#i mean... no shame to people who best know a fish species for the food!

[fishyfishyfishtimes]

This is what the life of a (definitely living) fish blogger is like

[chasseurdeloup-retired]

Ten CCs of Sass || Ricky and Kaden

TIMING: A few days after Ricky took on an asanbosam and after Kaden’s mime stabbing PARTIES: @ricky-corderbro and @chasseurdeloup SUMMARY:  Best roommates ever.

Kaden was starting to lose track of time in this stupid place. It was hard to know when was what when there were no windows in the room and time seemed to move at a snail’s pace. But he was pretty sure he remembered the layout of the room. And this was not it. Everything was similar but slightly off somehow. “Regan?” he asked, knowing full well he didn’t see her or Blanche or anyone else babysitting him at the moment. Maybe he hoped they would pop up around a corner or something. Still, no answer. But there was a fucking curtain halfway open and another patient on the other side. Putain de merde, just when he thought this fucking hell pit couldn’t get any worse. They must have moved his fucking bed in the night and now he had a goddamn roommate. And better yet, his IVs were taped down so thoroughly to his arm, he was pretty sure getting them off was going to take a solid ten minutes and take off hair and maybe even a little skin. He was thoroughly stuck. Fuck.

All in all it had not been Ricky’s favorite week. While thankfully they’d put him under for the harrowing process of putting his ribs back together and removing a portion of one of them from his lung, the pain afterwards had been almost enough to make him wish the asanbosam had finished him off. Sleep had been an elusive target, and it was only after a nurse had come in and given him something to knock him out that he’d managed a couple of hours. Waking up though, had brought a resurgence of pain everytime his heart beat and he took a breath, and it wasn’t until he heard a voice asking for someone named Regan that he realized how fucked his day was truly about to get. He recognized that voice, even if the last time he’d heard it they’d been on a rickety boat arguing about saving lives. He also knew that that voice was attached to someone he’d promised to try to kill, even if he was in no position to actually take action on the threat, “Oh you have got to be fucking kidding me.” he rasped out, voice still not up to par, “Did I actually die? I must have. This has to be fucking hell if I’m stuck here with you”

Kaden’s brows knit together. Something about that voice sounded vaguely familiar. He turned to get a better look at his new roommate. “Putain.” He groaned. It was the fucking do gooder lifegarud boy who was probably some kind of monster. Or knew a few. Of fucking course they ended up in the same room at the same time. What a cherry on top of being stabbed by a mime a few times the other day. “You’re right about one thing, this is fucking hell.” Kaden wanted to throw something but there was nothing but the pillow in reach to toss and, uh, he didn’t want to have to call a nurse to come pick it up off the floor. “The hell happened to you, anyway? Have a run in with a perfectly innocent supernatural monster? Or did your dudley do-right routine finally screw you over?”

Through the haze of pain and pain meds Ricky could feel Kaden’s voice grating on his every nerve, “Jesus fucking christ. Of course it’s fucking you” He attempted to push himself slightly more upright and was rewarding with a white hot pain shooting through his chest, “God. Do you ever tire of the sound of your own fucking voice? I will reach into my chest, pull out one of the many fragments of ribs floating around in there, and stab you in the fucking eye with it if it’s going to net me a reprieve from your sanctimonious bullshit.” He resigned himself to staying laying down and sighed, “You know, fuckhead mcfuckstick, there are those of us capable of distinguishing between an animalistic monster that lacks sentience, and a perfectly harmless member of the supernatural community. I’m sorry you somehow failed Humanity 101”

This little shit really thought he talked too much? Kaden scoffed. “You should ask yourself that. I’m not the one ranting over there.” He started picking at the tape on his arm as the kid ranted the same bullshit grumbling he’d heard a million times before. More colorful than most, he’d give him that, but more of the same. “Fuckhead mcfuckstick, that’s a new one.” He shrugged and continued to try and peel the tape away so he could try and leave before things got any worse. “So how’d that distinguishing go for you? Broken ribs, you said? Sounds like you had a really wonderful encounter.”

“It seemed fitting, given that you are both a fuckhead, and a fuckstick, and I’m Irish so we add Mc to everything.” Ricky rolled his eyes and managed to find the controller for his bed, raising himself so he was sitting upright, “Well it went great. Since I very clearly distinguished that an asanbosam is not a contributing member of society and is instead an animalistic hunter. But these were things I knew before. But you know something about being an animalistic hunter don’t you?” His breath came short for a few moments and he stopped talking, breathing as deeply as he could and balling his fists to try to work through the pain, “We were ambushed. Broken ribs, punctured lung. But I lived so, that’s something. They’re not great ones to run into.”

Irish. Noted. Kaden was sure he’d have plenty of time to figure out what kind of monster he was sharing a room with. Unfortunately. “Asanbosam? Too bad no one was around to stake it. If only there had been an animalistic hunter nearby. Guess they were all at home.” Or stuck in a fucking hospital. “That or no one thought you were particularly worth saving. Shame, you clearly handled it so well on your own.” Still, sounded like the kid had it worse over there than he did. “You got lucky. Even with all that.” Not that he was glad he was okay. That wasn’t his concern at all. “Ran into one of those the other week, seem to be out in force with all the eternal darkness shit going on. Almost stole someone up into the trees.”

“I managed just fine. No deaths, so, that’s a win. It’s currently somewhere in the forest trying desperately to get the rosary I knotted around it’s ankle free. They’re particularly averse to religious iconography.” While most children had a childhood full of nursery rhymes, a solid portion of Ricky’s home education had been the various varieties of vampire that would inevitably try to attack him; he knew a fair few of them by heart. “Ah yes, there’s that good old Hunter “judge, jury, and executioner” mentality that we all know and love so much. Good to know whatever didn’t do a good enough job of killing you left you up on your high horse.” Ricky reached for his phone on the bedside table, scrolling through several texts in all capital letters before deciding that was a problem for later in the afternoon, “I always hated the idea of those fuckers.” He muttered, trying to find a more comfortable position that didn’t put pressure on, well, anything. “Iron teeth. Prehensile tail. They’re straight out of some dnd dungeon master’s nightmare. What the hell is a west African vampire doing in Maine, though?”

���Oh are they? Wow, gee, I never fucking knew that. Slayed my first vampire at age ten but wow, thanks for that riveting new information. Where would I be without you?” Kaden rolled his eyes. He just told the guy he’d encountered an asanbosam the other week, so he would’ve thought he wouldn’t go and explain the obvious to him but guess he was wrong. “Yeah well, sorry to disappoint you by my survival. But if you tell me where that fucking thing was I can probalby deal with once I’m out of here. Or get someone else to. You know, if you can lower yourself off that pedastool to cooperate with an animalistic hunter for two fucking minutes.” This was going to be a long goddamn day. God help him if was two. He wasn’t sure he could survive that. The tape on his arm must have been something akin to duct tape because it wasn’t budging. At this point he wasn’t sure he cared if Regan insisted he stayed the full two plus days. No way would he last that long. “They’re a pain in the ass. Species origin doesn’t really seem to be a barrier to entry in White Crest. I mean, for fuck sakes, the sky’s been dark for a few solid weeks now and you’re questioning how an African vampire got here? This place is fucking weird.”

Kaden’s abrasive voice was honestly on par with the subtle grinding and shifting of his ribs that he could still feel every time he breathed, “God. It just so fucking shocking to me that you’re top of seemingly everybody’s ‘kill him becore he kills us’ list. People skills like yours you should be in public relations. As to the where would you be? Fish food. We’ve gone over this. You’d be fish food.” Ricky let talk of killing a roommate fall silent as a nurse came in to administer meds and bring up his breakfast tray… which was seemingly full of things he didn’t want or couldn’t really eat. One insipid slice of ham seemed to be about the only thing he trusted, and he quickly ate it, keeping his face turned away from Kaden so there were no erstwhile glimpses of fangs, before pushing the tray and the rolling table away, “I don’t want the rest of that, if you’re feeling extra peckish.” He could feel the gentle wave of pain meds crashing on the beach of his mind and pulled his phone towards him, tapping out replies to texts as he listened to Kaden prattle on in the singularly sanctimonious way that he seemed to have cornered the fucking market on, “Yeah as long as there’s a fucking tree vamp wandering the forests near my home attacking members of my community I’m going to fucking question it. But in answer to the question that was sandwiched between the insults… it was the forests to the north of the Docks, bout half a mile before the bridge to Harris Island. It felled a tree right in front of my truck, blocked the road.”

“Yeah, yeah. And I thanked you already, alright.” Kaden bristled at the reminder that he was somewhat in debt to the other man for saving his life. Fucking hated that. Normally he made it easy enough for him to push that aside but then it would rear its ugly head. Still, he noted where that vampire was last seen; he’d be sure to kill it once he was out of there. Not long after, a second nurse came in to give Kaden his tray full of what he assumed was awful lumps of sadness pretending to be food. He wasn’t wrong. The food looked awful, alright, but that wasn’t what his eyes were focused on. No, his eyes went straight to the black and white striped shirt folded neatly with a beret on top and the red blood stains seeped into it. His eyes grew wide with confusion and his pulse picked up as he looked at the nurse. She gave absolutely no indication that anything was out of the ordinary and simply smiled and asked if there was anything else he needed. Kaden was stunned for a moment but it didn’t take long for him to flip the try, tossing it away from him the way someone might flick away a bug that had crawled onto them. He tried to quell the panic that was rising up in him. The nurse just looked confused, not like she was going to kill him on the spot. Which was good, but honestly he still wished he had a weapon in hand. Then she shook her head and looked around like she was unsure of what room she was in or what hat just happened. “Did I do that?” she asked, looking at the try and bending down to pick it up. “I’m sorry, I’ll bring you another tray. Is that your shirt?” Kaden shook his head. “Uh, no. Not-- No, that’s not my shirt. And you didn’t-- Sorry, I lost control of the…” He wanted to run more than ever, his hand reaching for the metal stand where the bags of fluids were hanging. It’d be a decent blunt weapon in a pinch. “Oh, that’s alright. I’ll be right back,” the nurse said, all the fallen food and tray in hand and left with a smile, like nothing ever happened. “Putain de merde, what the actual fuck?”

“It’s really hard to take the thanks seriously when it’s always tied to some sort of insane purge-and-purify human-centric rhetoric. Really sort of dulls the shine on that particular compliment.” He’d been focused on his phone and not on the speciesist fuck in the bed next to him when there was suddenly a ruckus that made him snap his head over to look at that side of the room. “What the absolute fuck you lunatic?” Ricky was so taken aback by the scene that he attempted to push himself out of bed to help clean it up, before bolts of white hot pain reminded him why he didn’t do that, “oh fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck oh fuck.” The nurse’s response to the whole ordeal was what really made him narrow his eyes, “What…. What the fuck is happening over there.” A tiny spot of red appeared on the bandage around his chest and started to grow fractionally, “Well that’s not good. But… that wasn’t normal. What the fuck landed you in here? I mean I had just assumed it was something along the lines of “finally got what was coming to him” but that was fucking weird.”

“Nothing, nothing, it’s--” he started. Kaden’s eyes darted back and forth between where the tray had just fallen and the door. He ran a hand through his hair, trying to slow his breath, bring his pulse back to normal. He let out a deep sigh, trying to rationalize that nothing else was coming in, no one else was there, it was probably safe. But Regan wasn’t back yet. What if something happened to her? Fuck. “Uh, shit. Don’t fucking laugh,” he told his current rommate as he rubbed his palms against the sheets, trying to dry the sweat off them. “I’m here cause I got stabbed by a fucking mime.” He thought about hitting the call button, get another nurse in here. But what if that didn’t help? What if that’s what brought another possessed person to send him more warnings and threats? Shit. He was more or less defenseless if someone came back for him. This is why he fucking hated hosptials (among all the other reasons). “So yeah, that striped shirt, it, uh-- Fuck.” He felt like such a paranoid idiot.

Ricky didn’t really think of himself as a cruel man. He tried to do right by his friends and his neighbors, be a good upstanding member of the community, and generally behave in a way that would make his mother proud of him; since she was his metric for what a good person should be. But the minute Kaden a) told him not to laugh and b) mentioned he’d gotten stabbed by a fucking mime, Ricky knew he was in a losing battle where all of his attempts to be good were going to falter in the face of a chance to ridicule his enemy. The laugh bubbled up inside of him and the piercing pain in his chest battled for dominance but he couldn’t help but throw his head back in laughter, shaking slightly in his bed, “Oh god…. Oh my fucking god…. I”m sorry I’m sorry… did you… did you… the great fucking hunter… bane of the supernatural… did you fucking get put in the hospital by a goddamn mime?!” His laugh turned into a painful cough and he bit down abruptly, a fang piercing his lip “ow fuck.” The laughter died down and he shook his head, “Ahh it feels good and at the same time fucking terrible to laugh. How… how did you manage to get stabbed by a fucking mime?! Was it even a real knife or was this just some A+ really top of the line pantomime that this fucker did?”

Well that was one way to quell the panic. Kaden could feel the anger rising up as the other man laughed. No, fucking cackled. “Shut it!” He looked down at the edge of the bed where his tray fell. Maybe there was still a shitty clementine or something he could chuck at Ricky’s fucking head. No luck. There was still a beret, though. It’d have to do. He scooped it up, scrunched it into a ball, and threw it across the room. He practically huffed as he stewed over on his bed, but a quick glance over to his roommate practically splitting his stitches and he saw it. It was subtle enough, but there was no denying those were fucking big ass fangs sticking out while he cackled. Well that answered that question he was pretty sure he already had the answer to: Monster. What kind, he’d figure out later. Couldn’t be undead if he had a heartbeat to monitor, he knew that much. And couldn’t be a wolf since he didn’t send all of Kaden’s hairs on edge. “Putain, yes it was a real fucking knife, connard! He was fucking possessed or cursed or some shit! Broke into the restaurant and just b-lined to stab me and wouldn’t fucking stop until he died.” It was goddamn karmic watching Ricky in pain over his laughter. Deserved at least that much.

“Oh no, Fuckstick McMimeChow, you have to deal with this fucking laughter because it is infinitely hilarious that a hunter got hospitalized by a motherfucking mime.” Ricky allowed the beret to hit him in the face if only because Kaden deserved at least that tiny victory, and as he held hit in his hands he took as subtle a smell of it as he could, but picked up nothing more than dollar store shampoo and dried blood, “Well… while you can make the argument that choosing ‘mime’ as your profession is in and of itself a curse… he was definitely human.” He threw the beret to the foot of Kaden’s bed, “but I’d wash your hands. There’s blood on that.” Pressing a slightly trembling hand to his chest; the pain was now greater than the mirth he’d received at Kaden’s attack, “That’s gotta be like… top three for shitty dinners. I mean I’ve had some bad fucking meals in my day and while I’ve had both a beer and a dinner roll thrown at me on separate occasions nobody’s actually stabbed me before. Did you kill this maniacal mime or did he just… I don’t know… suddenly expire after coming into contact with undiluted Blood of Douchebag.”

If Kaden had something else to throw, he would have. Instead all he could do was glower at the laughter. “Congrats, Detective pain in the ass, I figured that much out. Of course he was human. Problem was you didn’t see him. The look in his eye. It was like the lights were out but he was going through the motions anway. Really fucking determinedly, too.” At Ricky's evaluation of the beret, he looked down at his hands and decided to just wipe them off on the side of the bed again, in case there was any blood. “We barely got to wine let alone dinner. So yeah, I’d say so.” He sighed, thinking about the poor chardonnay that was the only thing that was murdered that night. What a waste. His head snapped to face his current roommate at his last comment. “Hey, I did not kill him! I mean I didn’t take it lying down, but I’m not a murderer, alright!”

“I’m really feeling like you’re not putting the same energy into this rivalry I am, Kaden. I come up with Fuckstick McMimeChow and you counter with Detective Pain in the ass? I’m a little hurt.” Ricky shot as withering a look as he could manage across the room, “Are you sure that was a curse/possession and not just… you know… people’s kneejerk reaction to being in your presence? I know I always get the urge to stab you repeatedly.” Watching Kaden wipe his hands on the bed he listened before chuffing a sigh of a laugh, “Wait wait wait… did you get stabbed by a mime on a fucking date? Jesus fucking Christ talk about just compounded shit luck. That’s just… woof. I don’t even have anything cutting or scathing for that… that’s just… that’s just rough.” Any pity he might have felt for the other man quickly evaporated however, “Oh yes. This old chestnut. I spend my life hunting things down but am somehow not a murderer. What is this… verse 78 now?”

“Sorry, what can I say. I don’t spend as much time thinking about you as you think about me.” Kaden rolled his eyes at the remark. “He came into the restaurant seemingly just to stab me. I know I’ve pisseed people off but that just doesn’t track, alright. I never saw the guy before. And yeah I was on a fucking date, alright. Shocking as it may be. Still not sure if it’s one of the worst dates I’ve been on.” He sighed at the remark. Of course, couldn’t get through one conversation without the bleeding heart bullshit. “Look you don’t have to fucking agree with me but don’t act like you don’t know where I stand. Murder is when you kill people and monsters aren’t people. Been over this.” There was a long stretch of silence and it seemed like they might be done snipping for the moment. Fine by him, but the whole place was too quiet. And he couldn’t bear to sit and watch this shitty infomercial. He waited a moment, maybe he could just sleep or something. But he wasn’t tired. “Hey, uh, I think you have the remote. Can you change the thing. The Price is Right is about to come on.”

“Jesus. And I thought my fucking love life was grim. You make me look like a fucking Casanova if that wasn’t one of your worst dates. Am I surprised? No. But still… blech. Poor woman. I’m just assuming you’re straight because I’m fervently praying you’re not gay. We don’t want you on our team. Please stay far the fuck away.” It was still a little surprising how robotic and immediate the return to the hunter party line was. There was almost a moment, for just the briefest of seconds, where Ricky had thought that they were actually on the road to… well whatever was one step above immediately homicidal. But all of that was swept away in an instant as they returned to ground zero. A zone which did not net Kaden any tv privileges. “Sorry.” He picked up the remote and plucked its batteries out, tossing the powerless shell to the other man, “Sharing is what people do.” He smiled a wide bright smile, every perfectly maintained fang shining in the horrible hospital lighting, “and I guess I just don’t qualify. Besides…. Price is Right with no Bob Barker? One of us is the monster here and it isn’t me.” This was going to be the longest hospital stay ever.

[hobbitsetal]

courtship customs from the world of Vex and Mute

@ofsaltandsmoke asked me about marriage and courting within my world and i realized that a) i have like seven kingdoms to talk about and this is gonna get long, and b) some of my other friends might be interested! therefore, a long and unduly complicated explanation, but under the cut, because manners.

Sarkine:

arranged marriages are common, but the people take an Elizabethan approach in that they believe the spouses need to be happy for the marriage to be successful, or any children will inherit discontent and strife. therefore, parents work to make sure their children will like their spouses and will typically seek their input on who they choose.

those of higher social status are typically more concerned with status and expected more to make the most of a situation than those of lower status. love matches and passionate souls who ignore conventions are not heard of, but are typically turned into cautionary tales.

affairs are horribly scandalous and are a source of shame for literally all parties involved. the dishonored spouse is a subject of pity, but any children they had together will be regarded with suspicion and people will assume the worst (naturally): children of a cheater are likely to be cheaters and liars themselves and therefore a really terrible choice in the marriage market.

courting customs, once the marriage has been arranged, include gifts of fancy goods and songs. richer families might arrange for spectacles, such as parades of horses and camels and a present of enormous rugs or tapestries. poorer families might give a precious barrel of water or a jar of preserved foods by way of demonstrating their ability to provide. the family who initiates marriage negotiations is expected to give the presents as a means of “persuading” the other family to accept the bargain, so the gifts can come from either the bride’s or the groom’s family.

in some wilder clans, those further out in the desert and farther away from cities, the wedding ceremony may involve kidnapping the prospective spouse and carrying them away to a tent in the desert for several days’ honeymoon. the rulers of the lands and provinces tend to uphold this custom as a nod to their nomadic roots and as another form of proving they can provide for their spouse–in this case, in the form of providing a dwelling place. this has the added benefit of giving the couple some privacy to discover the first delights of conjugal bliss.

Litoria:

being a land of farmers and small towns, rather than desert tribes and clinging to the banks of a river, Litoria’s marital customs have developed in different strains. a greater emphasis is placed both upon societal acceptance of a marriage and on the couple’s freedom to choose for themselves, a tension that illustrates Litoria’s traditional tendencies and the religious schism that occurred after their migration from Sarkine.

couples are typically expected to seek the blessing of their head of house, and the initiating suitor again must demonstrate to the head of house their ability to provide and their compatibility with the one being courted. the formality of this courtship depends largely on the family. some families get the gallachs involved and hearken back to the religious roots of courtship. other families leave the couple largely to their own devices, with the caveat not to disgrace the family by getting pregnant out of wedlock. 

social status is important partly as a testament to the suitor’s character. courtship customs probably most closely resemble 1800s America, with walking excursions, quiet talks in semi-isolated rooms, and spending time with the family as whole being expected. the heads of house frequently monitor the town’s gossip about a couple and what the people have to say about suitors.

while there are those who believe in the old religious tenets and believe children inherit their parents’ flaws, many others frown upon adultery simply for the social upheaval it can bring.

young couples may live in their parents’ houses after being married. most couples will carry on the business of one or the other’s parents, whether farming or mercantile endeavors, and living with the parents simplifies this business arrangement. children frequently build their own homes with the first five years of marriage, situating the homes at a distance that both allows for privacy and the continuation of the business partnership.

Terasi:

being a loose confederation of different seafaring clans who are loosely based from an archipelago off the coast of the Realm and of Sarkine, marriage customs differ wildly. some clans believe in conducting raids for their spouses. consent is not required. 

others conduct elaborate negotiations that frequently end in one or the other clans’ expansion. gifts of ships, goods, and slaves are common. these negotiations are delicate affairs that must take into account the pride of both captains, the size of their respective fleets, and the values of the fleets. a slave trader would do poorly to offer slaves to someone who trades extensively with the free-minded Realm.

physical health and craftsmanship are both highly prized, and an individual of extraordinary strength or skill may be able to command a higher marriage price than their clan alone could dictate. this is the best strategy small clans have for expanding their fleets rather than being absorbed into a larger one. many clans also seek omens to predict the success of a proposed union. storms or dead calms on the days of negotiations are considered bad omens. mild breezes, good fishing weather, or sunny days are considered good omens. some of the bloodier pirate clans might consider fog a good omen, as it conceals their ships during raids. the island towns put less of an emphasis on physical health, as it is frequently the less hardy Terasians who become land bound, and more of an emphasis on skills. these skills may include storytelling and people skills as well as tangible crafts, since tradesmen must rely on their gifts of gab to distinguish themselves from their compatriots. 

Sabline: 

 as a matriarchal society descended from Sarkine, Sabline’s customs combine romance and pragmatic provision. matriarchs frequently arrange matches, men are considered flighty and led by their appetites, and place an emphasis on physical capability and home skills. husbands are expected to know how to cook and clean and to perform strenuous manual labor so that the women are free to bear children, run businesses, and maintain social relations. 

extravagant gestures are expected as men compete to capture the women’s attention. displays of strength, intelligence, and romance range from over-the-top to subtle, depending on the woman they seek to attract. variety is also highly encouraged, as women insist on individualized courtships. 

men are also expected to be able to navigate the outdoors well, and to be proficient hunters. animal pelts are acceptable courtship gifts, as is meat. men are expected to build or cause to have built a home. the woman and her family are expected to furnish, decorate, and stock the house. the size and elaborateness of the house as well as the quality of the furnishings depends on the capability of the families. a miner may be expected to provide only a single-room hut, albeit one sturdy enough to withstand the bitter mountain winters. a guild leader’s son would be expected to provide a house with a kitchen, separate bedroom, and separate room for entertaining and business. social expectations run businesses and dictate families. 

business mergers are more likely to be conducted by means of an advantageous marriage, since businesses will be run by future children. 

The Realm: 

faeries are simultaneously freer and more formal with their love than humans. since magic flows through the Land and the people, Magic is an important component of courtship and those with dissimilar skills may not be able to pursue an otherwise suitable marriage. if one suitor’s skill with plants runs to a tree that cannot grow with his beloved’s trees (an invasive species, or one that would choke out another tree), the courtship will be ended. if the lovers are unwilling to end their romance, the parents or the local healer may invoke the local steadmaster. if their magic is compatible, or if one has little magic to work with, their courtship depends on personality. 

courtships may involve displays of magical ability or skills. they always involve singing, both because magic is invoked through singing and because parties and feasts involve singing. flirtations are accomplished in verse, from coy hints to bold and personalized ballads. 

while marriages are not dictated by parents, custom dictates that they must be blessed by the local healer or steadholder, as a final test of magical compatibility. young couples who marry without obtaining their blessing may be forced to move to a region where one or both may not be able to work with the local magic, lest their interference with plants and magic upset the local ecosystem. 

marriages among the nobility tend to be more political and center more around efforts to understand the flow of magic. magic, according to all known studies, is not purely a matter of genetics, but depends on the will of the Land and the mental fortitude of the people, and the power of the different noble families depends both on political skill and magical strength. a family whose magic has waned may remain a political force thanks to alliances and mercantile endeavors. love offerings therefore include everything from songs to woodcarvings to food to weapons, and love matches are more prevalent among faeries than among humans. 

Cratia: 

the nation formed of many nations, Cratia’s courtship rituals are even more varied than the other nations’, since they include all rituals plus family variations. strength and physical provision are recurring themes. 

intercultural relationships are a minefield of customs and traditions, and the success of these relationships depends on the individuals involved. some people care less for tradition than for their lovers. others want their lovers to learn their family traditions, or want to prove their devotion by learning their lovers’ traditions. many marriages blend different cultures, and a suitor may give a tiny carved ship as a courtship present while planning a honeymoon getaway. 

Quenten: 

the most isolated and most culturally unique kingdom, Quenten is notable for its steppes and its social stratification that is even more stringent than Sarkine. the higher up the mountainside a family lives, the more important they are. marriages cannot be proposed to one higher. Quenten is the only kingdom to use concubines. 

while one of lower social status may be taken as a spouse if they demonstrate unusual skill or intelligence, they are more likely to be considered a secondary spouse than a primary spouse. this applies both to men and to women. commonly, the nobility and the royalty choose lower spouses for their artistic, mechanical, or magical abilities, and marry a peer for political or social stability. peer marriages are contracted between parents or overlords; secondary marriages are usually left to the higher person involved. while a lower class may refuse a marriage, the higher person may be able to inflict repercussions. most marriages, however, are love matches, though the social dynamics can be tricky and fraught with jealousy and scheming. 

gifts are frequently based on the spouse’s skills. higher spouses are expected to compensate the lower spouse’s family for the loss of skill. the extravagance of the gift depends on the strata of the spouses involved. the higher up the mountain, the greater the gift. thus, a lady from the second level cannot take a laborer from the seventh for less than she would offer a craftsman from the third; the gift depends on her status, not her husband’s. peers must give gifts to each other of equal value, something sensitively negotiated by the parties involved.

[narutoocgallery]

I mostly want a full review of my character, You may publish if you like, i wouldn’t mind. :) Thank you!!

General

Name: Megumi Yoko

Age: (Part I) 12-13 (Part II) 15-17

Species: Human

Gender: Female

Sexual Orientation: Bisexual

Blood Type: O-

Birthday: October 18 (Libra)

Personality: Peace loving, Elegant, Irresolute (very hesitant), Diplomatic, Idealistic, Avoids head-on arguments ( Just like how she fights lol) and Mellow

Good Trait(s): Diplomatic, Tactful, fair-minded, Peaceful, Calm.

Bad Trait(s): Detached, Indecisive, avoids confrontations, will carry a grudge

Like(s): gentleness, sharing with others, the outdoors, sweets, swimming, warm water/weather, the sounds of moving water, and Harmony.

Dislike(s): loudmouths, conformity, Dry areas, large social groups, Snow, Given to many opinions, Difficult decisions and Short range fights.

Hobby(ies): Swimming!, and Sewing

Fear(s): thunder/lightning, abandonment (or being alone), being forgotten or not remembering things, and being buried alive.

Strength(s): Water Areas (Ocean, Lakes, Rivers, etc) Water style jutsus, and Swimming,

Weakness(es): Lighting style jutsus, Strong Fire style jutus, Dry areas, and heat

Personal Quote: “…well ya know…”

History: (Sorry if this sucks)

Megumi was born in the hidden mist village, her mother and father were respected ninja of the mist. After Marriage Megumi’s mother was shortly pregnant And became a stay at home mom. Megumi’s father kept being a ninja and was away from home a lot, this was normal. One Afternoon when Megumi was 6 years old Megumi’s home was broken into by rough ninjas

Megumi’s mother was out-numbered and she knew she had no chance to live though this but she wanted to save Megumi. She hide Megumi away and told her to not come out no matter What she heard, Megumi was hidden in a closet ( if the rough knew about her or not they left her.) Megumi’s mother was killed, her body was left on the floor to bleed out.

Once it was quiet Megumi peeked out to only see her dead mother on the floor in a pool of blood. Megumi sat down next her dead mother, she was covered in blood but she seemed to have zoned out. She didn’t Leave her mother’s body until her father came home and pulled her away.

At the age of 8 Megumi started growing scales on her feet/legs. This was a passed down trait in her father’s family that skipped him but got to Megumi. She tried her best to hide them from everyone

at school and in the village but it wasn’t hidden for so long. The kids at her school found out about her scales and she became out casted and labeled as a “Freak”. This made socializing with others hard for her. She didn’t make a real friend until she was 12 and got put into a team with Yachi and Takeshi who became her friends.

Megumi’s Father wasn’t around as much as he wanted to, He had many missions he had to do and had to be away for long periods of time. Megumi’s father loved her without question and that is why he did so many missions. He always left her in the cable hands of the village elders who treated her better than any kids at school. Megumi had a hard time calling the elders her friends but they were all she had at that time.

Looks and Appearance

Body Type/Looks: Thin and Pale

Height: (Part I) 147cm [4'10] (Part II) 155cm (5'1)

Weight: (Part I) 33.9 kg (Part II) 39.8

Makeup/Facepaint: None

Hairstyle(s): (Part I) Long, Curly Purple hair tied up in a ponytail. (Part II) Long, Curly purple hair that is wore down and ends at her mid-back.

Accessories: Small Gord that holds Water/(part II only) Poison water.

Scent: Wet Strawberrys.

Scars or Tattoos: has some small cuts on her left forearm. (It’s always covered)

Jewelry and/or Piercings: None.

 Traits: Her Feet/Cafs are covered in scales, these help her swim and stay longer under water.

Relationships

Parent(s):

Ryuunosuke Yoko (Father)

About: Ryuunsuke is a respected ninja of the hidden mist, He is well known for his powerful Water wolf jutsu that he kept in his own family.  

Tomomi Yoko (Mother)

About: Tomomi was a beautiful women and was much liked in her village; She was once a powerful Ninja but stopped when she got married to Ryuunsuke Yoko; Soon after their marriage, She becomes pregnant. She has her first child; Megumi. As Tomomi was at home; their home was raided by thugs against the mist village. Tomomi was killed; She managed to save her daughter.

Sibling(s): None-

Relative(s): None besides mum and pops.

Best Friend(s):

Yachi (+Teammate)

About: Yachi and Megumi were put in team together, Over the years of fighting together they became best friends. Megumi trusts Yachi more than anyone else in the Hidden mist village.

Friend(s):

Takeshi (+Teammate)

About: Takeshi and Megumi where put together in a team; Trust was low at beginning because of Takeshi’s quiet and miss-trusting looks. But slowly they began to trust and get along better, the more missions they went on and they got to know each other.

Sensei(s):

Yori-Sensei:

About:  Yori-sensei is the ring leader of Megumi’s Team. Not much is known about Yori, besides that Is powerful enough to go toe-to-toe with kakashi of the hidden leaf.

Student(s): Megumi couldn’t teach a monkey to breathe.

Crush(es)/Spouse/Bf/Gf:

Gaara of the Sand.

About: Gaara and Megumi didn’t start out liking each other. Megumi was incurably scared of Gaara after his fight with Rock Lee and even more so when Gaara’s demon was unleased. Megumi avoided Gaara for a long awhile. Her fear disappeared when she finally saw that Gaara wasn’t the monster he used to be.

Megumi ran into Gaara (and his siblings) why out on a mission with her team. Her fear of him was still their but he proof that he has changed.

Rival(s): Nah.

Enemy(ies): nah.

Pet(s): No pets

Favorites/Least Favorites

Food(s): Namagashi (type of wagashi, which is a general term for snacks used in the Japanese tea ceremony.) Taiyaki ( “baked sea bream,” is a Japanese fish-shaped cake.)

Drink(s): Green Tea, Calpis Water

Color(s): Blue, Black

Season(s): Spring

Time of Day: Afternoon (2:00am-6:00am)

Weather: Semi-Summer with Clouds.

Flower: Dahlia

Animal: Wolf/Dog

Ninja Information

Birth Village: Hidden Mist

Current Village: (Part I) Mist (Part II) Sand

Academy Graduation Age: 12

Chunin Promotion Age: 14

Rank: (Part I) Genin (Part II) Chunin

Ninja Status: Villager

Are you in the Akatsuki?: Nah

Bijuu [Tailed Beast]?: Nah

Teammates: Yachi, Takeshi (Talked about in relationships)

Sensei: Yori-Sensei

Nindo: “Fight to be remembered.”

Chakra Element: Water

Weapon(s): (Part I) Kunai, Water (Part II) Kunai, Poison water

Jutsu’s

(Part I)

*Water Wolf Jutsu - Family/Clan based

Rank: B-Rank

Range: Vary

*Water Style: Wild Wolf Fang Jutsu- Family/Clan based.

Rank: C-Rank

Range: Long Range

Water Style: Raging Waves (Rank-C)

Rank: C-Rank

Range: Short to mid range

Ninja Art: Hidden Mist Jutsu (Rank-D)

Rank: D-Rank

Range: All Ranges

Water Clone Jutsu (Rank-D)

Rank: D-Rank

Range: All Ranges

(Part II)

Water Beast Jutsu ( X headed water wolf)

Rank: B-Rank

Range: Long Range

Water Style: Marine Battle Formation Jutsu

Rank: C-Rank

Range: Short to Mid Range

Water Style: Mount of the Serpent

Rank: B-Rank

Range: Long Range

Water Style: Poison Rain Jutsu

Rank: C-Rank

Range: Long to mid Range

Water Style: Poison Dart Jutu

Rank: B-Rank

Range: Long Range

Water Style: Water Whip Jutsu

Rank: B-Rank

Range: Short to Mid Range

Water Style: Black Rain Jutsu (??)

Rank: ??-Rank

Range: Short

NINJA STATS

1 - 5: Horrible

6 - 8: Below average

9 - 10: Average

11 - 13: Above average

14 - 16: Talented

17 - 18: Gifted [This is Sannin level]

Strength in Jutsu

Ninjutsu [ninja techniques]: (I) 11 (II) 13

Genjutsu [illusion techniques]: (I) 7 (II) 8.5

Taijutsu [martial arts techniques]: (I) 9 (II) 11

Kekkei Genkai [bloodline traits]: (I,II) 0

Doujutsu [eye techniques]: (I,II) 0

Kinjutsu [forbidden techniques]: (II) 2

Fuuinjutsu [sealing techniques]: (II) 9

Strength in Missions

Intelligence:(I) 9 (II) 11

Wisdom: (I) 7 (II) 9

Strength: Physical: (I) 8 (II) 9, Water: (I) 10 (II) 13

Agility: (I) 9.5 (II) 12 (she’s good at running away lol)

Dexterity: (I) 8 (II) 10

Stamina: (I) 7 (II) 9.5

Constitution: (I) 1 hit O.K (II) 4 (Can take a hit but not many, She’s a distance fighter.)

Charisma: (I) 4 (II) 7

Comeliness: Cute as frick (I think she is.)

Chakra Control: (I) 10 (II) 14 (She needs the chakra control for 90% of her jutsu,)

Cooperation: (I,II) 10 ( This doesn’t change much.) 

P.S Please take your time <3

General: 

Generally fine, with a few points to consider.

 a)      Her personality you describe as ‘peaceful’ and ‘calm’, which doesn’t sound like someone who carries a grudge. Also, someone who is indecisive wouldn’t make for a very diplomatic personality, I think.

b)     You can’t really like harmony but dislike conformity, as the opposites usually go hand-in-hand.

 History:

Again, generally fine, the level of violence and adaption to family life is realistic to Naruto. I like the idea of growing scales on the body. It’s a distinctive character trait – it’s a bit of a shame that you decided to cover them up in the character design – maybe as she gets older she becomes more comfortable showing them?

However, I’m not sure she would get bullied that hard over them. Biologically exaggerated Kekkai Genkais have been shown to be not uncommon in the Naruto world, and just having some scales on the bottom part of your legs doesn’t seem all that weird in comparison to be honest.

Also, why does her father leave her in the care of the village Elders specifically? You said the mother and father were well-respected in the village, but it doesn’t sound like they were actually on the council or anything, meaning there would be more convenient people to leave her in the care of; after all, Elders are busy people (I assume by Elders you mean members of the village councils – if you just mean older people in the village, disregard this last bit).

 Looks and Appearance:

Why does she smell of wet strawberries?

The biggest question here for me is how the leg scales help her swim/breathe underwater? If she had webbed feet I might understand that helping her swim, but scales wouldn’t do that. Also, scales wouldn’t affect her ability to breathe underwater – or do you mean just stay under the surface of the water? In which case the breath-holding thing would come into play again; most ninjas are trained to stay underwater as cover and hold their breath for a long time anyway. I can’t really see how this trait would help that.

 Relationships:

Family and teammates look nice and varied. Maybe put a bit more thought into her parents’ personalities and values? Many of these would be passed onto their daughter as they raised her.

It’s good that your character is consistently scared of Gaara; that’s good and realistic. Maybe think some more about how their relationship would develop past ‘her fear of him disappeared’.

 Justus and Abilities:

Well-balanced; she’s not overpowered and you have a good spread of abilities and ability progression. I assume many of the jutsus you mentioned are made up by you so I can’t really comment too much on that.

 Overall:

You obviously thought and planned out a lot about Megumi Yoko and it shows. She’s neither overpowered not overly weak. I really like her, but I feel like you could make her stand out a bit more. With a very introverted personality, it can be easy for these kinds of characters to feel less well-defined than others. Looking forward to where you take her from here :)

[lifeofmarvvel]

The Song Sirens Sing Part 4

Summary: Peter Parker's life changes drastically when he joins a pirate crew. He learns new skills, meets new people, and has the time of his life. Then he meets a siren and his world once again turns upside down.

Word Count: 3718

Warnings: Uh, grumpy Tony who isn't the nicest but it makes sense in context

A/N: Sorry it's been a while since I last updated! Homework is killing me (yay junior year). This is honestly the longest thing I've ever written. And I thought -insert bug pun here- was long! This is like 1k more. It was a total of 9 pages on Google Docs. Enjoy!

Series Masterlist

Part 3

Nakia had successfully lifted your mood from that dreary day by the coral. She gave you answers to questions most people wouldn’t let you know about. For example, she had been to the surface a bit due to her job (which was one of the only secrets keep from you), and she was able to tell you all about it. She apparently saw humans quite frequently and told you what an odd species they are. Of course, this piqued your curiosity. And also drew you away from wanting to be a siren.

Everyone was still pushing you to train more so you could try again with a different ship. Well, mostly everyone. The twins and Clint supported your decision to take a break and gladly spent lots of time hanging out with you. Nakia encouraged it, saying it was better for your mental health that way. Natasha understood, but was slightly disappointed. She’d rather resume your lessons but gave you the space you needed. It was a shame. She was one of your closest friends, and she was actively avoiding you now. Oh well. If that’s what she thought was best.

“Zo,” Clint announced, mouth full of seaweed-wrapped shrimp. “Duu oou davva o ta dhe urfaks umellow?”

Wanda wrinkled her nose at him. “You are disgusting. Has anyone ever told you it’s impolite to speak with your mouth full?”

Clint swallowed his food and spoke again. “Well, considering we’re not very polite to each other in any way, shape, or form at times, I thought it was okay.”

“That’s not a good excuse,” Wanda replied.

“Yeah,” you chimed in. “Just ‘cause you and Pietro bully each other doesn’t mean the rest of us bully each other.”

He pointed an accusing finger at you. “I call your bluff. Nat bullies me all the time, and you personally have picked on me before.”

You shrugged your shoulders. “Okay, so maybe we decided as a group to bully you. But that still doesn’t mean we bully each other. What were you trying to say, anyway?”

“I was saying-” Clint cut himself off. “Wait, what do you mean you decided as a group to bully me?”

“Unimportant. Now tell us.” Wanda shrugged off his question with ease you wished you could have.

He let out a huff. “Fine. I’ll ask Nat later. As I was saying- do you wanna go to the surface tomorrow?” He pointedly looked at you, like he knew you were about to protest. Which you were.

And before you could respond to his look, Pietro spoke up. “What is so interesting that we’d have to go to the surface?”

You silently thanked Pietro. For once, he understood. “Well, you see,” Clint began to explain. “It’s something one of a kind. But we’d have to go to the shoreline, too.”

Before anyone could speak for you, you voiced your own opinion. “No way. The shoreline? You’d have a hard enough time getting me to go to the surface. But the shoreline!? Where the humans live? Nope. Nada. Hasta la vista. See you never because I’d rather go into hiding than be forced to come with.”

Your friends laughed at your actions. “Aw, come on, (Y/N). Is there any possible way to get you to come with?” Clint begged.

You hesitated. There were a few exceptions, but you doubt it’d be any or if Clint would even be able to guess any of them correctly. He, annoyingly, noticed. “That’s a yes. Now, let’s see. Hey, Wanda. My super great, amazing, wonderful- ha, Wandaful- friend who just so happens to be able to read minds. Could you help me out here?”

Wanda gave a little laugh at that. “Bribery does not work on me, Clinton.”

“It was worth a shot.” He shrugged his shoulders. “Give me a second, and I’ll have it figured out by myself.” You waited patiently, seeing what he’d come up with. Sure enough, he came to the realization that just telling you might help.

“Okay,” he said. “Might as well tell you. I wanna go because, first of all, the sunset looks prettier above the water-”

“Yeah right,” Pietro interrupted. “We all know you only said that because it might convince her.”

Clint turned to look at him quickly, raising an accusatory finger. He turned so fast, you were almost convinced he was the speedster and not Pietro. “Stop that! It’s not cool!” He turned back, this time looking more like himself. “As I was saying,” he said, agitated, “the second reason why I want to go to the surface is because I was promised I’d be able to try coffee by someone else- who shall remain unnamed- and we won’t be the only ones there.”

When you continued to look unimpressed, he continued. “Okay, third, I wanna go because I wanna talk to my friends and I want you to meet some of them.”

You pretended to be shocked. “You have friends other than us? Why. Clint, I didn’t know you were capable of such a thing. I surely thought that when you weren’t with us you would just sit around and cry.”

Clint huffed at you. “I’m really getting sick of this whole ‘pick on Clint’ thing you guys enjoy so much. News flash, it’s not fun for me. And yes, I am capable. They were my friends before I met you.” He crossed his arms across his chest.

He looked sincerely upset. “I’m sorry, Clint. I’ll try to do it less often if it’ll help you feel better,” you apologized.

He hummed while thinking for a second. “I’ll think about accepting your apology more later,” he said in a joking tone. “But really, I want you to come do some more stuff, meet more people. Even if you have to step a bit outside of your comfort zone to make it happen.”

Wanda and Pietro nodded, adding a bit of their own input. It seemed like all your friends were ganging up against you, trying to get you to go. When you finally appeared to be swaying back and forth between going and not going, Clint decided to use his last bit of persuasion.

“You know,” he said cautiously, “if you go, you’ll not only get to meet some of my friends, you’ll get to meet- and I quote you- ‘the mysterious Coulson’ I always talk about.

That definitely grabbed your attention. Meet Coulson? Yes, you were going for sure. “Alright,” you announced. “I’ll come with.” At your words, your friends all cheered. Who knew they’d be this excited about you going out for once. “What time should I be ready by?”

“The festivities will take place around dinner time and last after sunset. So I’d say around noon? It’s quite the swim,” Clint responded.

You nodded, taking in the information. “Thanks. I’ll try to be  ready by then, I guess.”

“No. I don’t care that they’re ‘civilized.’ I’m not going to let Pete go. You said yourself that he might get sick again if he so happens to the one that did it to him. And what if she’s there? I’m not risking it. We don’t need to lose a sailor, especially not one who’s so young.”

“But that’s the thing, Stark. I said might. So far, research has shown that when the sailor does see them again, there is only a one in twenty chance that he will get sick again. And you know what we do then? We give him the treatment again, assign him to a month in the middle of the country, and once it’s up, we send him on his way again. He’ll be fine.”

“Why do you guys even have a festival on the beach with mermaids, anyways?” Scott spoke up.

Shuri sighed. “I thought I already explained it. It’s part of our cultural festivities, and we’d appreciate if our guests could join us. But it seems you are too stubborn, so I might just have T’Challa ban your whole crew from our nation for such an insult.”

She got an automatic reaction in response. “No, no. That’s not necessary. I guess we’re all going, right crew? Zip-a-dee-doo-dah!” Tony said with forced enthusiasm. It was quite the spectacle. “But seriously, after tonight, we need to head back. We helped you with your business. We have to get back to pirating.”

“You’ll have to talk to my brother about that,” she responded. Almost as if on cue, T’Challa walked in to the room. “And look at that! That is my cue to leave. Goodbye, Avengers. Don’t let my brother harass you too long. I have some more improvements I need to work on.” She turned on her heel and walked out of the room briskly.

Well, there was no doubting it anymore. Two co-captains well into their life were frightened by a sixteen year old genius princess. Who’d guess that’d be a fact they’d ever have to expect? Tony was very glad he made the decision to head back to sea the next day. While it was nice to sit around and plan things for a while, he was missing his ship. And the sea. And not having to deal with humanity other than the however many crew members they currently held. Yeah, he was longing for that.

He got up slowly. If Spiderling was being dragged along, no matter how much he disagreed, he’d have to go inform him of such a matter. Zip-a-dee-doo-dah, zip-a-dee-ay. Wonderful feeling, wonderful day my eye, he thought.

You waited on a rock in the midst of buildings, waiting for the rest of your friends to show up. The ocean was alive all around you. You watched as fish, mers, and seahorses alike raced back and forth through the streets. If only Clint would hurry up. You knew he had a habit of oversleeping, but it was well past noon. Where could he be?

To your advantage, he showed up right then, almost as if beckoned by your thoughts. “Huh,” you whispered. Louder, you said, “Hey Clint, since when were you a mind reader”

“What?” He looked befuddled.

“I was just wondering where you were, and then you popped out of nowhere,” you replied.

He chuckled. “No, I’m not. I can promise you that. I was making sure I had everything,” he gestured to the bags he was carrying, “when I realized I had to make a stop to grab a few.”

You got up and swam towards him. “Well, now that’s all sorted out, everyone else is close, right? Let’s catch up to them.” You started to head off when you remembered you didn’t know quite where you were supposed to be going. Stopping in your tracks, you turned around.

Clint caught up, but he didn’t answer your question. With some insistence from you, he relented. “They all left beforehand.” When you started to sputter, he cut you off. “They already knew since they agreed to go before you did. And because they don’t trust me to get there on time. So, come on; we have to prove them wrong!” He took off, speeding ahead of you.

“Hey! Not fair!” you called after him before starting off yourself. As fast as the two of you went, you made it to the shoreline in no time. All you had to do was follow Clint. It’s not like trying to follow Pietro, after all. Clint was generally a lot slower than the speedster. Clint was waiting for you to catch up after he came to a stop.

“This is it,” he said, confirming your thoughts. From the looks of it, you were at a human dock. There were giant poles sticking into the ground, some covered in algae, but mostly looking rather sturdy and brown. What appeared to be the bottoms of ships floated along it. As you noticed this, you gulped.

You took a deep breath, trying to center yourself. “Okay. I guess I ought to give it a try.” You nodded at him, and he paused for a second before nodding back.

“If you ever feel overwhelmed, make sure to find me, Nat, Wanda, Pietro, or Nakia,” he said, swimming over to you.

“Nakia’s here?” you questioned. “Nobody told me that.”

Clint gave you a sheepish smile. “Uh, yeah. Sorry? Oops.” He grabbed your arm and started to pull you up to the surface with him.  

You had no idea what you were getting yourself into.

The dock was swarming with humans. Around the edges, mers laughed, joked, conversed, and even arm wrestled with them. It definitely was a party of some sort. You couldn’t believe your eyes? How did humans and mers get along so well? You had grown up with stories of the two species hating each other. How did this happen? A quick glance informed you of the twins joking around with a woman with a brunette angled bob, Nat was observing to the side, and Nakia was talking with a tall man who held himself with a sense of awareness.

Clint noticed your awe and confusion. “There’s an organization that works with mer and human interactions. They helped plan this, don’t worry. Actually, I should introduce you to a few of them. See if you’re interested in joining.” With your permission, the two of you took off.

He lead you towards the dock, carefully avoiding the other mers. He seemed to have one set person in mind. Eventually, he lead you to a man who, despite the heat, was wearing a suit and tie. The man had thinning hair, and looked as if he was always busy, but somehow gave off the feel of being everyone’s friend.

Sure enough, Clint swam right up to him, dragging you with him. Just in time, the man ended his conversation with the woman next to him. She moved on to talk to someone else, and he faced Clint. “Barton!” he exclaimed. “Long time, no see!”

“Sure has been, Coulson!” Clint replied, excited to see his friend again.

“Wait, that’s Coulson?” you asked, astonished. “I thought you were another mer! Clint! You deceiving little-”

“Alright, no need to go there!” Clint cut you off. “Coulson, this is (Y/N) (L/N). And (Y/N), well, you’ve already figure out who he is: Phil Coulson.”

“Nice to meet you, miss,” Coulson said, sticking his hand out. You shook the water off your hand the best you could before returning the handshake. “I doubt Clint has told you this, but I work for the Seafolk and Human Interactions, Education and Living Division. Or, SHIELD. We specialize in ensure humans and mers get along nicely. The annual Royal Festival of Wakanda is just one event where we do so. Granted, their culture was always more accepting towards merfolk, we just help it run smoother.”

Fascinated, you started asking him all kinds of questions. Who knew when he’d have to take off? Gone was your fear of drowning a human with your voice, at least for the moment. You definitely had no need to sing right now, and doubted you would the rest of the night.

He told you that they had a special program just for “superpowered” mers, as he put it. They teamed up with those willing to take down bad guys. Bad guys who had ships, spent time near the ocean, or even if they teamed up with a few humans to lure them to the beach and the mer took care of the rest. He assured results had shown it helped mers feel better about their more killer skills, and was carefully thought through.

“So, Miss, (L/N), will you consider joining our team?” he questioned.

“I’d be honored to,” you answered.

He smiled at you. “Great. Now, I should grab some more information for you. I’ll try not be get too sidetracked. Feel free to converse with others while I’m gone.” He turned and disappeared in the crowd. Taking up his advice, as Clint left a while ago to talk to Nat, you wandered around to find someone else.

Peter walked behind his captains as they approached the dock. It was swarming with people. He wasn’t sure why they were here. All that he had explained to him was that today was a traditional festival Wakanda held every year. Nobody told him what for, only what he had to be there, along with the rest of the crew.

All kinds of people were there, or rather, all the tribes were there. He also saw other foreigners, like their crew. Just here and there, and few enough for him to realize that Wakanda only let extremely trusted outsiders in, and it was an honor to be there. No wonder they kept a reputation for being a third-world country. When only a handful of people- who could be trusted not to blabber all their secrets- knew it wasn’t one, it was easy to do so.

He saw a few scattered around the dock, some in clusters, some not. He saw one white man making his way around the ranks of people, seeming to hold conversations with everyone but still moving quickly. He turned and started talking to T’Challa and the mermaid with a green tail. “This way, kid,” Tony said, redirecting his attention.

Peter’s head snapped back. “Aye aye, cap’n.”

Tony sighed. “Why is that everyone’s first reaction to me giving orders?” They continued their way through the swarm of people until they came across the banquet table. “Alright, stay in this area, okay? I’m hungry, so I’ll be here. Don’t wander off too far or you’ll get stuck.”

Peter confirmed he heard, and wandered off. He was wary about the mers. Everyone said they were evil creatures. Why did Wakanda interact with them so freely, then? He guessed it was in his best judgement to trust T’Challa. Seeing a quieter, shady spot by some trees, he walked over. Nobody was around; it was secluded and conveniently out of sight but not too far away from the banquet table to get yelled at. He sat down, admiring the water rippling in the sunset.

Lost in his thoughts, he didn’t hear anyone approaching until they spoke. “Hello?” the voice called out, startling him. He looked around before looking down and realizing it was a mermaid in the water. Well, actually two mermaids. One with brown hair and a red tail. The other had (H/C) hair with a (F/C) tail and looked about his age.

The red tailed one appeared to be restraining the other girl. “I noticed my friend here getting nervous when looking at you, so I’m assuming that means she thinks you’re cute and wouldn’t dare approach herself. So here you go.” She rounded on her friend. “I’ll know if you leave because,” she tapped her own head,” from now on I’m going to peek in more than usual. No funny business. You leave, I’m sending both Pietro and Clint after you.” Her friend gulped and nodded quickly. Satisfied, the red tailed girl turned and left.

“Uh,” the girl voiced. A slow turn let her face Peter. They made eye contact and memories came flooding back. He knew who this was. This was the siren that fateful day only a week or so ago. She looked as shocked as Peter felt. “Uh- I’m- uh- goodness gracious I’m bad at this. Sorry?” she said, but it came out as more of a question than a statement. She shook her head and started over. “Sorry for almost drowning you?” she offered again, still in a questioning tone.

Peter couldn’t believe his eyes. She was in front of him. He hadn’t imagined it. Her semi-question confirmed it. All caution towards the possibility of getting Siren Sickness again flew out the window. “You didn’t though,” Peter answered. “I’m here, aren’t I?”

She laughed softly. “Yeah, I guess so. I’m so sorry about the incident! It was my first sinking and there were so many expectations and I didn’t think it’d be someone my age. I thought it would be a grumpy old sailor dude who would’ve been better off gone but then it was-”

“Woah woah woah,” Peter cut her off. “No need to get in a hassle. I understand peer pressure and all that jazz. I just joined the crew the last time they stopped at my hometown a few months ago.”

She let out a breath of relief. “Thanks for understanding.” Peter gave a slight nod in response. “Oh, uh, I’m (Y/N), by the way.”

Peter smiled. Trying to avoid a cheesy comment, he instead said, “I”m Peter.” She smiled back at him. They launched into a conversation full of stutters, blushes, and lots of apologies. But Peter  didn’t mind. In fact, he could feel himself slowly falling for this girl. Who’d have guessed? And he was sure it was real feelings this time, unlike the ship incident. She wasn’t singing, after all, no matter how melodic her voice sounded.

“WHAT ARE YOU DOING!?!?!?!” an angry yell overpowered their conversation. Oh no. Peter knew just who this was. He mouthed ‘I’m sorry’ to (Y/N) before he felt a hand grab him by the collar and spin him around. Tony reared on the mermaid. “I don’t want to see you near him ever again!”

He ignored Peter’s protests and dragged him away. All the while, he was scolding him. “This is exactly what I was worried about! We need you, we can’t let you get sick again! How could you so carelessly do that?! The exact mer that hurt you!” He kept ranting, pulling him away.

Peter protested as they made their way through the crowd, hoping that someone might help him out. “But I’m fine! See?! We were perfectly fine and you ruined a great conversation! She told me she wasn’t targeting me and she regretted it!” His shouts fell on deaf ears (quite literally, when he saw a merman with a purple tail signing out of the corner of his eye).

Tony eventually stopped in front of Shuri. “I need you to check up on him again. He risked his life and I need to know he’s okay for tomorrow.”

Shuri looked in his eyes. “If you’re absolutely sure he needs it.”

“I’m sure.”

Part 5

[risenspectre]

         IMPORTANT  HEADCANONS  TO  CONSIDER  !

CAN THEY USE CHOPSTICKS:  

Under read more for length.

Nope. Not only does having just three fingers per hand make it hard, he also never used them. He prefers more practical utensils... or his fingers. He has good fingers. They can do many things. Pretty exciting things, too... like picking up mini pizzas or fish! Also, I tried to hold two sticks with three fingers, and it’s not something I’m used to. I need at least four, on most occasions. You know, sort of like, but not exactly like, this:

A turian doesn’t have two fingers on the top. Angara can do it, but it would be the bottom stick with two fingers on it.  turians probably can’t use normal chopsticks, and most turians might not really be able to use anything other than those sticks that are fused together like kitchen tongs. It’s doable and I’ve done it before, but I have thinner fingers than a turian. There’s a variety of ways to hold them, like this:

Anyway, I have brought the subject to the attention of a server. Most agree that most turians, if not all, can’t do it. Nihlus can’t do it. He’s never had to. I don’t know how we ended up here, with several paragraphs, and with picture, but here was are.

WHAT DO THEY DO WHEN THEY CAN’T SLEEP:  

Nihlus doesn’t sleep. Jk. Thought, he did have trouble sleeping as a kid, since his home wasn’t the most secure. People might come in to steal your stuff, steal your pets, steal you, move everything a little to the left from you. Rival mercenaries who felt slighted because someone was taking all the best jobs might try to make a point out of the partner and kids. He didn’t always have a krogan or human to hide behind, and his mom wasn’t about to be coddling him by letting him sleep in the same bed as her. Maybe the same room, but not the same bed. Little choice on what room to keep him in when there is limited space. Well, unless he sleeps in the garage...

Funny enough, this went to the server, somehow, but that was unintentional. He sleeps a little better when fully alone, and he also sleeps very well with someone he feels he can trust to protect him or not hurt him. Warmth helps him feel more comfortable. He is down for them big and warm krogan hugs.

Anyway, as he got older, and he went to boot camp, he had trouble sleeping in shared quarters. He’d try to remain quiet and keep an eye on what was happening, eventually falling into a light sleep. It was noticed, eventually, and they tried to do something about it. If they hadn’t, he likely would have done less well. He still didn’t sleep so well, but he was getting better. Eventually, slept mostly alright, on average. He had nightmares at times, especially after certain Spectre missions, but he could take medication and sleep when he had the opportunity. His average sleeping time could range from very low to just below average. Rarely more. He can only sleep in if he does it by waking up in between.

After he was shot, that ship flew. His sleeping pattern was also shot. He woke up at times planned in, but he wouldn’t sleep until late. He’d be checking his messages and respond to them. He’d exercise. He’d also play a few little games to keep his mind sharp. He’ll clean up and do other chores around the house and whatever other work needs done at the time. His VI will be a little on his case. He’s got no shame responding at very late/early hours to people, but avoids doing so to messages from his therapy and such. The time fluctuations are partly because he doesn’t take his meds very regularly. He should take them at least an hour before his planned time to go sleep, but he doesn’t. He might have sleep paralysis, nightmares, terrors, vertigo.

WHAT WOULD THEY IMPULSE BUY AT THE GROCERY STORE: 

It depends. Nihlus never got to have many snack as a kid, so I guess he’d impulse buy a candy or toy and then hide it. Not that there were any stores for him to buy from or that his parents even let him handle credits when he was six. When he was around twelve though, he might, but only small things, and only because the one taking care of supplies wasn’t telling on him. Never something he’d be caught with. Don’t wanna leave a paper trail. Good thing he barely snacks, even now. He takes some with him, but those are little things sort of like nutrient bars, but they’re nutrient bites.

Um... Anyway, back to the question. He might impulse buy something that’s on sale. Even if he knows it may have been marked up prior, he might be tempted if he can’t check if it was. Though, he’ll still compare the price to other items, so it’ll at least be cheaper than what he thinks is too expensive. He tries to be less careful about the budget, but it’s hard. It took a while to get him to buy more things he didn’t plan to get, since money wasn’t something he was certain he’d have for the formative years of his life. He tends to check before going to a store as well, so he knows what’s in stock and he can plan better. Checks less for clothing, though. He’s upped his budget since getting a good job, too.

If someone he likes enough said they wanted something or mentioned something they need, he might just get it, but he’ll rarely buy something special for himself on most occasions. Maybe a drink for himself? Some fancy food products he rarely sees? Some fancy soaps for a loved one? Jewelry for bae? Some flowers he thought looked pretty? That extra fancy coffee from that new place that just opened and looks legit for the team.

WHAT ORDER DO THEY WASH THINGS IN THE SHOWER:   

First, the essentials, so he can get out quick if something so happens to come up for which he’d need to cut his time washing short. Essentials are: Genitals, face, armpits, collar, behind. He goes over the arms, neck, fringe, chest, sides, back, legs, the essentials again. He scrubs his plates, too. Gets in the nooks and crannies. He’s usually rather fast, because he need to get to work.

Of course, that’s on a day most would call normal. He’s not injured, he doesn’t have something that needs cleaning more than usual or something that isn’t supposed to get wet. If his muscles ache, he’ll wash in the same order as usual. He was a little more careful with his head for a bit, even though the would had already healed by the time he’d woken up. When he has enhancements or other such things added and the wounds aren’t fully closed yet, he elects to dry wash more and will start with the injured area to get it out of the way.

There are times it takes a little longer outside of those situations. That’s when he zones out for a minute or so. He tends to immediately resume what he was doing once back to reality, and not even realize he was out, so it’s not much longer on most occasions.

At any rate, he just autopilots his way in and out the shower on most occasions, and sticks to a pattern, making it not longer than ten minutes and being able to cut it to two or three if needed.

WHAT’S THEIR COFFEE ORDER:  

Nih doesn’t care. If he’s getting coffee, it’s for an artificial, temporary, and irresponsible energy boost that leaves him more tired by the end of the day. Also, I don’t know much about coffee. He prefers it without milk, though. He doesn’t like milk. In some things, cream is fine, but not really in coffee. Milk isn’t good for him. Real milk, that is. The dextro kind, not real levo milk. He can’t digest lactose. Neither can other turians. Nut-based milk is fine, but don’t put it in his coffee. Put it in his alcoholic beverage, maybe. I don’t know, just give him an espresso or something.

WHAT SORT OF APPS WOULD THEY HAVE ON THEIR SMARTPHONE:  

Utility apps, for the most part. News, mail, job-related apps, weather, travel, shopping, health tracker things. Also brain training kind of games. Word games, puzzle games, some other genre mobile games. Image viewing and storing apps. Of course, this is different with the tool. He won’t use the same one for a mission as he uses in his personal life. It would make some things to easy for the wrong kinds of people.

HOW DO THEY ACT AROUND CHILDREN: 

He doesn’t, usually. He tries, but he is not great with kids. He tries to be less uptight. He’s never considered dealing with kids. Not until he had a ship with someone he felt good settling down with. Most turians he knew were very careful with human babies and children once the war was over, due to humans being so soft and not wanting to cause more trouble between the species. Some elect to not even touch them. Nihlus is less worried. His claws are usually blunted, anyway. He’s not sure how human kids will respond to him, but he’ll try if he has to. He’s at no risk of accidentally scratching them, on most occasions, he just doesn’t know how a baby human would respond to how a turian looks and sounds. Lucky for him, most human babies respond well enough to cooing. This extends to turian babies as well, since cooing is used to comfort those.

The first time he handled a baby, he held it at an awkward distance from himself and didn’t know what to do other than let the little bugger bounce on his leg. The baby didn’t do much, and the parent came to get them after just a short bit. He was less concerned the second time, and that was a human baby. Went to look for the parents, because he thought human parents didn’t usually abandon their young with no reason. You know, like most intelligent species in the milky way. Also, they kept crying until he picked them up.

Whether he wants children depends. However, he is worried his old ties might haunt him and thus them and his partner(s). I’ve discussed this on Discord before. He’s afraid he may fall into habits his parents had or mess up somewhere. He’s afraid his children will get in trouble. He’s afraid to make sure his children grow up able to fend for themselves, because he doesn’t know how much is enough. Growing up being able to fend for himself meant using weapons from an early age and having to fight for his home and safety. It meant aiming a gun at someone. It meant blood and fear. None of these things are what he wants his kids to deal with at that age. Yet he’s also afraid that he might coddle them or be too easy on them and they won’t be able to protect themselves. He’s not sure how much he wants to keep his past as Spectre, because he is still not sure if he would want to have kids while active as Spectre, away from his kids. It’s not the most pleasant job to talk of and he doesn’t want to encourage them to pursue that line of work. He rather his kids become something like doctors or artists. He might be jumpy and used to going outside the law to deal with things, so people better not mess with his kids. He just wants his kids to be safe, and happy, and to not need to struggle like he did and to not be ostracized like he was. He wants to make sure of it, but he doesn’t know how to do that when he’s a mess. It’s sort of one of the few things he’s afraid of messing up enough so to not do it.

WHAT WOULD THEY WATCH ON TV WHEN THEY’RE BORED & NOTHING THEY REALLY LIKE IS ON:  

He likely won’t really watch tv at that point. It’d require him to sit still for too long when he’s already not invested, so he’d just be paying half attention after about maybe ten minutes. Maybe less. After that, he’ll likely get to other tasks.

tagged by:  @n7soldiered​ Thanks! And apologies for the wait. tagging:  I don’t know who has already done this, so... um... @vakarianblues​ @autodiscothings​

[drferox]

20 questions with Dr Ferox #3

It’s that time of the week again where I desperately try to churn through a chunk of questions in the vain hope of shrinking my inbox. I will attempt to tag you in your question, but you know what tumblr is like, however if you asked on Anonymous you’ll just have to scroll through to see f your question is here. There’s also a cool cat picture. In no particular order...

@a-floral-ghost asked: What is parvo? I know it's a disease(?) That puppies get but I don't actually know what it is

Parvo in this contest refers to canine parvovirus, a horrendous disease of dogs which is very persistent in the environment but generally well prevented by vaccination. You can read more about it here.

Anonymous asked: Do dogs need to be bathed? I live in a rural area so a lot of people here only give a dog a bath when it's gotten in to something? Is bathing frequently vs infrequently vs never a big issue? 

Unless you are targeting a particular skin condition and using a medicated or therapeutic shampoo, most dogs don’t require a bath more than once a week, however many will go months or years without a bath with no problem. Grooming should still be done, because long coats can matt very easily and cause pain, but it’s not strictly necessary that every dog receive a regular bath.

Another Anonymous asked: Why do dogs shake/tap their feet when you scratch them in the right spot

Generally it’s a reflex. However if you already have itchy skin (often infected) and you start rubbing, you make the itch worse and the dog is compelled to scratch.

Yet another anonymous asked: We have an almost two year old female great dane (just over 1 year and 8 months) who is on the small side. She only weighs about 125 pounds and stands about 3 feet at the shoulder. She is my moms pride and joy but she refuses to get her spayed until she is 3 years old. I've read varying info about spaying giant breeds too early or too late. What is the general age a smallish Dane should be fixed? We have never had a giant breed before. Question tax, came for the stories, stayed for the knowlage

While I won’t give specific advice about any animal I cannot examine, at 3 years of age there will be no protective benefit for mammary cancer, though it will still prevent pyometra. Generally for a large, short-lived breed I would spay around skeletal maturity. There is a discussion here, and many of the reblogs are worth reading too.

@ happinessisnotalwaysfun said: It's ferret shed season! Ferrets don't cough up hairballs, and they can kill or cause big bills; but they still lick a lot due to discomfort. Ferretblr has lots of theory methods for helping - vaseline, pumpkin, raw egg, fish oil, ferretone - but no evidence. Is there a best way to help my catweasel digest fur safely? Any evidence, or suggestions?

I would generally use a feline laxative, but raw egg, fish oil and ferretone are probably not doing any harm. There’s not a lot written about this in ferret textbooks, but it does not get as cold down here so perhaps our ferrets are less fluffy. I would avoid vaseline because I generally avoid oil based products for animals, and I would avoid pumpkin because I don’t want to add that much fiber to the short gut of a possessed sock puppet ferret.

@taskmaking asked: I love your blog! I came here because of fantasy biology, stayed for everything else. I have a cockatiel who's pretty old (19ish) and he's flightless and blind apart from light/shadow. It's hard to get him to step up because he thinks your hand is attacking him. Is there anything I could do to make that easier on him?

Bird are not really my forte. Perhaps coupling the step up request with a sound or texture that he cal learn to associate with safety? Being blind is tough on a prey species.

@perryloveslamps said: Not sure what a question tax is but love your blog.   So my Doberman/Rat Terrier has 7-9 small 2cm fat polyps that we've had examined by our vet as soon as we find a new one and they always turn out to be fatty lumps. Now this YT Channel I watch (VetRanch) removed a small lump the same size within days of finding it because the Vet "Doesn't like lumps on Boxers."  Are different breeds more prone to fat polyps rather than cysts or tumors and visa versa? Thanks so much! 

Boxers are colloquially known in the veterinary community as ‘cancer factories’. They just get cancer very easily and very young. In particular they often get Mast Cell Tumors, which are sneaky bastards that can look like anything, and can easily be mistaken for a benign cyst or lipoma. The paranoia is sometimes too much to bear, so it’s not unreasonable to remove every vaguely suspicious lump of a boxer when they’re on the younger side and still have a good heart.

Anonymous asked: if it were at all possible, would you ever treat or study coywolves?

Sure, possibly, if the opportunity presented itself. But they are on the other side of the world and I’d rather be involved in species closer to home, like our own dingo, bilbies, whale sharks, tassie devils or (if one dares to dream) resurrected thylacines.

Anonymous asked: What's your personal opinion on big poodles? Not from a vet point, just what do you think of them? 

How very glad I am that you haven’t asked for a veterinary opinion when i have already answered that question.

Generally I think they’re treated a bit too much like toys and not allowed to be dogs by certain owners, particularly the smaller ones that are easier to carry everywhere. Which is a shame because there’s a real, proper dog under all that frou frou if you avoid turning it into a nervous wreck.

A presumably different Anonymous asked: i've wanted to be a vet since before i knew the word but it wasn't until a few years ago that i really fully grasped what it meant. i got into the aquarist hobby several years ago, and two moments really solidified my career choice. The first was when one of my fish fell ill and after a round of treatment, was entirely better. the second was when i tried everything i could think of to save a betta i had and it died anyways. it was horrible, i cried for hours, but i realized: i want this life.

Sorry about your little fish friends. I kept a lot of bettas when I was in  high school, they’re certainly addictive and do have personality. For a while I considered moving somewhere tropical to save on heating costs so I could keep more.

Anonymous said: Me and my aunt both have maltese dogs, but they're very different. Ours is a very sturdy boy with thick legs and a body built vaguely like a lhasa, he's somewhere around 6kg. Hers has a very different structure, she is much smaller (around half his weight I think) and lankier, with a very long, thin muzzle. It actually kinda looks like the differences you'd see between the different Poodles, so I was wondering, are there different breeds of Maltese too, or could one of our pups be a mix? 

I can only hazard a guess, but I suspect one or both dogs are probably a mix, and I would suspect the larger one. Lots of dogs that are small and fluffy enough just get sold as ‘maltese’ through pet stores because that’s popular.

@ sketchywyvern said: What is your favorite fur color/ pattern on cats?

While it’s hard to beat a bold mackerel tabby, I’m finding the karpati pattern particularly interesting lately.

@2goldensnitches said: Dr have you had to treat budgies before? Mine like it when I give them spinach, kale and clover to eat but are very picky about accepting pellets instead of seed, and they refuse to try fruit at all. I hope it doesn't mean that they'll get future health/dietary problems

It’s very rare for me to see a budgie in normal hours because there’s a clinic with a better bird set up nearby, and most people are unwilling to pay the after hours fee for a budgie. They are likely getting enough vitamins from the green leafy vegetables so I wouldn’t worry about the fruit, and as long as they are eating the pellets and not starving themselves I wouldn’t stress too much.

Anonymous (Anonymouse?) asked: Can pet mice get rabies vaccines? Even if they're of questionable origin, would it even be necessary?             

It would be off label use and potentially ineffective. I don’t know of any documented mouse rabies infection that occurred naturally, though I understand it can occur in laboratory conditions. To catch rabies a mammal basically needs to be bitten by an infected animal and survive the bite. The odds of a mouse receiving a deep enough puncture wound and surviving long enough to catch rabies is fairly low.

@badgerface890 asked: Would tail docking fix a dog's problem with obsessive tail chasing? Or would the fixate on the stump or something else?

Depends why the dog is obsessively tail chasing, and I can’t comment specifically on an animal I cannot examine. They may fixate on the stump, they may not be chasing the tail, just running in circles, or there may be a painful neuroma in the tail causing the behavior. There may also be a brain abnormality responsible for the behavior, or a genuine obsessive disorder that would be better treated with medication.

Anonymous asked: I know your opinion about overbred dogs (e.g. pugs and apple-headed chihuahuas), but what about cats? Munchkin cats look incredibly cute, but I can't help but think they have to have some serious joint problems. Is feline selective breeding as problematic as it is with dogs, or it doesn't really affect their quality of life as much?

Anonymous friend, i would dearly like to refer you to the search function of this website. You can even search for munchkin cat to see if this has already been discussed. 

Anonymous asked: Hello! I have recently gotten into the habit of feeding the crows that roost near my home ( they seem to thrive well on the dog food mixed with raw chicken egg and sides of fruit I give them) , and I was wondering if there was any advice you could give me to make sure I am feeding them good foods? Thank you!

I’m not sure which country you’re in, but Australian Ravens are the most common ‘crow’ here, and they are mostly carnivorous. Feeding dog food is probably not that bad a balance. Lots of people feed cheap beef mince which is too fatty and deficient in vitamins, causing nutrient deficiency in young birds. You can reduce this by using a low fat mince and mixing it with a insectivore bird rearing mix.

However, it’s generally inadvisable to feed wildlife as it makes them dependent on human support for survival and will change both their behavior and the local ecology. If you’re going to do it anyway I’d rather they be fed something that’s good for them, but question why you feel that wild animals need to be fed in the first place.

@reachyourlimit said: Have you ever encountered a dog with patches of ingrown hairs? My dog has 2 symmetrical patches ~2cm diameter on either side of her tail on her pelvis(?), they've been there for a long time, yet she doesn't care one bit about them. She's been to the vet for them, all she told us to do was keep them clean like I would for ingrown hairs on myself until they finally break the skin, but she'd never seen it before, she even took pictures to show other vets at the clinic later (question tax to come)            

They’re reasonably common on the feet, between the toes, of prickly coated dogs like staffordshire bull terriers and shar peis. They can get infected and be uncomfortable, but sometimes don’t bother the dogs at all. It’s odd to have symmetrical patches in a place where the skin isn’t rubbed a lot. It might be dysplasia (which is pretty harmless) instead of ingrown hairs, but if they’re not malignant, not a symptom of metabolic disease and not bothering the dog then it’s of low concern.

@ seriouslyy asked: Do you have any child/puppy behavior resources? A friend's uncle just got a new puppy, and their 6 year old is loving the puppy, chasing her, carrying her around, feeding her treats, and the parents just keep saying "aww look the puppy loves her" when she is clearly stressed and just bit the child. The child is rather spoiled (personal opinion) and the parents are just so excited their daughter is happy, and won't listen to my friend. So i'm hoping outside sources would help them understand.

Hmm, there’s not really a website I tend to refer people to. I usually have handouts in the clinic. ABC’s Catalyst program had some decent videos about understanding dog behaviour that are easy to understand, and you might want to ask @why-animals-do-the-thing for a list of resources. The last think anyone wants is a kid getting bitten.

And finally another Anonymous asked: Do you enjoy running this blog? I was looking at some of your super old post and feel kind of bad that this was supposed to be an escape but kind of became your job.

I have spend a long time avoiding answering this question because I wasn’t totally sure of the answer. I enjoy some parts of this blog, the interesting questions and discussions it generates. I love it when something is drawn based on something I wrote, whether it’s a throwaway comment or a story or a fantasy biology creature.

But I don’t like being treated like a personal Google. I don’t mind clarifying an answer, or discussing a complex topic, but when a question could have very easily been answered b a single, quick Google search it just feel a little...disrespectful I guess. I spend a lot of time on this blog. I’m not keeping up with the questions I get already. I spend even more time in my jobs and I would really, really like to get back to more fiction writing in addition to all the other life stuff I’ve got going on, so it’s really difficult not to be snarky at some of these questions.

But I do like the community. I like what gets created. So I take the good along with the bad.

I adore my Patreon supporters, but this blog doesn’t pay anything like my real jobs. If it did then I could afford to work a few days less per month to write more.

[jeanbaltsubsta-blog]

Online dating sites are bullshit

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7 No I went on these dating sites last year and what did I get in return, my bank account cleaned out from a dodgy site that kept taking daily subscription fees without my knowledge for months. .  I respect ppl and especially women who know what they want and say so.  Warren confirmed that these dimensions were indeed highly predictive of relationship success and could be used to match singles.  Sitting behind a computer screen is totally useless.

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