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sungie · 4 years ago

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hello love so excited to see your req box open☺️❤️ could you possibly do jealous megumi or inumaki when they see you talking to your ex?

a/n: ahhh hello!! <3 omg thank u for requesting i had a lot of fun writing this one // AJKJD;AJFD it’s so funny to me bc normally i don’t like jealous people blame my aquarius BUT um ,,, say less ,, mayhaps jealous fushiguro would be okay

(*ﾉ▽ﾉ)

masterlist

[𝐟𝐮𝐬𝐡𝐢𝐠𝐮𝐫𝐨 𝐦𝐞𝐠𝐮𝐦𝐢]

“Can I ask you something?”

Fushiguro’s voice is unusually strained. His words sound strung around the edges, yet there’s still something strangely vulnerable about what he's implying.

“What’s up?” Despite your nonchalance, you’re relieved he's broken the silence. It was clear something was wrong ever since he'd closed himself off, an irritated frown pulling at his lips. When you originally asked him about it, he shrugged it off as being tired, but you knew Fushiguro. It was obvious that he'd only responded to you out of polite necessity.

There's a brief pause as he struggles to find the right way to go about this. And then he's sighing, his gaze setting in resolve. "Who was that?"

You turn, casting your gaze toward the retreating figure. He's upset about that?

Fushiguro shifts in his stance.

"Oh," you blink, "you don't have to worry about it."

It's clear Fushiguro doesn't like your answer, and he glowers at his feet. "They seemed to know you well."

You can't help the amused breath of air that leaves your mouth. If you didn't know any better, you'd think Fushiguro were jealous. There's a bitter tinge to his voice, one that's all too clearly matched with his prickly attitude. You're not quite sure how Fushiguro manages to appear extremely disconnected while also obviously upset.

"I guess so." You chew on your lip, gauging his reaction. "They're my ex."

Fushiguro’s head snaps up. His eyes widen, disappointment quickly clouding over his expression. And then as quickly as it comes, a practiced stillness glides across his features and erases any trace of emotion, carefully preserving a mild, disinterested facade. "Oh."

You stifle a laugh. "Oh?'

Fushiguro sighs, rubbing the back of his neck. He leans his head against the wall in exasperation. "They still like you." The moment the words leave his mouth, he scrunches his face like the very thought leaves a bitter aftertaste, citrine and unwelcome. "It's so obvious."

"They don't."

"They do."

"And how would you know that?"

"Because they made a fool of themselves," Fushguro sends a pointed look your way, almost as if you're the one he's irritated with. "Like, they'd do anything to get your attention."

"Fushiguro," you start.

"It's so stupid," he mumbles, dropping his gaze, "it's just like how I"--

You tilt your head. "How you?"

His mouth parts in realization, and he sighs. "Forget it. It doesn't matter." He sticks his hands in his pockets, lips drawn to the side as he processes. It's something you've seen him do often.

Except, you're not expecting to witness regret flicker across his face. It's gone as soon as you see it.

"Would you?" When he looks back at you, a trace of desperation fills his voice.

It's almost as if your next words hold the answer to some long, puzzled over question that only he knows the words to.

"Would I what?"

"Go back," Fushiguro mumbles. "Would you go back to them if you could?"

"No."

Fushiguro blinks. "You didn't even think about it."

“I don’t need to think about it.”

"They'd take you back," he says helplessly.

"Do you want me to?" You tease, shaking your head. "I don't have feelings for them."

Fushiguro can't look away. It's at this moment where it seems as if there's no disconnection between what he's saying and what he's expressing.

"So, I still have a chance." It's murmured softly, phrased so delicately that it feels like a question and a realization all at once. You're not even sure if he intended for you to hear it.

"I told you, Megumi. You don't have to worry."

As soon as you say it, Fushiguro flushes. It's not just his ears--his entire face. "I'm not worried," he mutters hotly, assuming a haughty expression and turning away. "I don't know why you'd think that."

[𝐢𝐧𝐮𝐦𝐚𝐤𝐢 𝐭𝐨𝐠𝐞]

Inumaki’s upset. His violet eyes turn perfectly dead-pan with no trace of the gleeful recognition that normally lights across his expression whenever he meets your gaze. Neither is there any trace of indifference. In fact, upset might be an understatement. He looks furious.

It started off as a pout when he met your eyes from across the grounds. He’d waved, arm thrown over his head in an exaggerated sort of way. He’d tilted his head, too, physically whining about why you couldn’t finish up and join him and the others already.

That was before your sparring partner slammed their polearm into your stomach, sending you sprawling to the ground. It’s harsher than supposed to be, and you cough, clutching your ribs. You’re not hurt, it just stings a little.

It was then that you’d risked a glance at Inumaki, and witnessed every fluctuation of emotion that crossed his face. Even from here, it’s easy to tell exactly how angry he is. And judging from his reaction, you’re all too aware that he’s finally noticed who the person is that just violated sparring rules.

Inumaki’s usual reaction when you fall during training is that of amusement. He likes to tease you, as long as you’re not seriously hurt, especially since he knows that everyone means well.

But this is very different.

You grimace, trying to somehow communicate that it's fine, but --

“Konbu.”

It’s the rudest greeting you’ve ever heard from him. And it’s directed at the person sparring against you.

“Toge,” you hiss, “go away.”

Inumaki turns his gaze to you. His eyes soften, and he crouches down next to you, tilting his head to the side. “Salmon?” He presses a hand against yours, the one clutching your side.

Are you okay?

You nod, gratefully accepting the other hand he offers to help you stand.

Except, when you try to resume training, Inumaki doesn’t let go. His hand remains slipped into yours, and he even interlocks your fingers with his for good measure. His hand is trembling.

“Inumaki.”

He meets your gaze quickly, stopping himself from stepping forward. And then his anger defuses, and he sighs, tugging at your arm. He gestures toward the tree a few distances away, the same one you usually relax at with everyone in-between meals, missions, training, whatever.

You shake your head.

Even though you can’t see his mouth, you know he’s pouting. Except this time it’s not just out of wanting to spend time with you. It’s a childish pout, an angry pout, and you’re all too aware of what it means.

He doesn’t understand why you're letting your ex get away with this.

But it’s when you pry his hand off yours, that Inumaki glowers at you.

He wraps his arms around your waist, gentle enough to avoid pressing against your ribs, and he pushes you away from the sparring grounds. And more importantly, away from your ex who he visibly bristles at.

“Stop, we’re not finished --”

“Salmon, salmon,” Inumaki mumbles in sympathy, but even you can detect the obvious glee behind his voice, as he presses his cheek against yours.

You want to smack him.

He lets go when you’ve reached where he wants to go, and he gazes at you with bright eyes.

“You didn't have to do that, you know.”

Inumaki looks at you blankly. A sarcastic eyebrow raises.

You sigh, already knowing why it bothers him so much. “I’m still mad at you.”

Inumaki just shrugs, tugging at blades of grass and letting them blow away in the wind. He rests his head atop your lap, gazing at the leaves breezing back and forth.

#fushiguro x reader #inumaki x reader #fushiguro megumi x reader #inumaki to/ge x reader #fushiguro imagines #inumaki imagines #inumaki to/ge imagines #fushiguro megumi imagines #jjk imagines #/honeycomb

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scover-va · 2 years ago

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Generally when you reblog things I feel like I ask for ???/Carla/Chandrelle a lot. So I’m going to switch it up and say Rust for the ask meme

My favourite old man!!! And my favourite, dare I say, babygirl

Favourite thing about them:

His fucking CHAPTER oguhgguughggugh i could talk about him and his experiences for HOURS OGUGHGUGUH. Hi. I am NOT normal about him. Tho genuine, less vague answer is probably just. Like. His personality? Like he is SUCH a good dad and i just wanna see him and Weasel Kid bond post-game yknow??? But also like. His entire life is the wastes, people wanting to kill him and his son around every corner, yet he still tries and avoid violence whenever possible?? I dont know if it's more of a genuine pacifist thing or if he doesnt want his son to experience all this death, but like. I kinda wanna lean towards the second option considering how quickly he resorted to killing and shooting on sight when Rocky wasnt there. And I know thats mainly bc of trauma and determination to get to his kid but. I mean. Shooting Jeremiah in the chest was NOT necessary. Anyways also hes silly and goofy and I love him <3

Least favourite thing about him:

Maybe not about HIM specifically but like. I wish the mind control serum was explored more?? Like it kinda feels like a useless plot. Yes it triggered Carla's hardcore mod, but unless she or Sado were in contact with Reggie and Jeremiah somehow, then that mod could've just...been triggered differently. And like. It's mostly Sado's actions that drive him to that brink of insanity. I cant remember if Jeremiah told him to go to the inn, but the ONLY reason i can see the MC Serum being important is just to get him to the inn. other than that. He joins in on the ritual because he thinks it'll get Rocky back. He's already a player character, he doesnt NEED to be controlled by the player. And also I think the potential of him being the dead body up during Junior's lil assistance section of VG2 is unexplored

Favourite Line:

Not even the full line, but. Mayhap. I quote it all the time. (Full line is something like "Can't fit in there. Someone smaller, mayhap" idk I'm not pulling up the game to find it) Mayhap mayhap mayhap. Hes so silly I love him <3333

brOTP:

Again, I think he and Weasel Kid should have a father-son dynamic, as seen in one of my fics. They both lost what the other is, and I just mmmmm!!!!

OTP:

My number of Rust ships is. Low. Admittedly. But him with Bryce and/or Lazarus <3

nOTP:

Obviously The Hex has like 10 fans, and the number of Rust ships is. Low. But I'm just gonna say the obvious notps; Weasel Kid, Sado, or Rocky. Thank fucking god this fandom is small because weirdos would use Lionel's voice line about never figuring out Rust and Rockys exact bond as an excuse for proshitting. So. Yay small fandom moment <3

Random Headcanon:

I dont know how random BUT while in the Wastes, he's fairly thin and doesn't eat much, only eating up to half of their food rations, often less, saving the rest for Rocky. But he had slight muscle to make up for it, because I'm sure carrying around supplies and a bigass shot gun all day every day + walking all day every day at least builds up SOME muscle. Once he gets to the inn, however, he loses his gun and doesn't walk around too much. After all, the inn is MUCH smaller than the wastes. So, he ends up losing muscle. Not to mention he's probably eating less (especially after the possibility of fully coming to terms with what happened to his son), so. He grows thinner. Though he DOES go down a road of recovery (probably with Bryce's help tbh, knowing how Bryce is) and ends up regaining some body fat! He eventually gets healthy enough that he slowly develops a bit of a dad bod :-) I wanted to draw out this hc but couldn't get the anatomy to look right so I forgot about it, but I am VERY happy I get to ramble about it now <3

Unpopular Opinion:

There are like 2 or 3 other people who talk about Rust enough for ANY sort of 'popular' opinion to form. So. That sucks. Does him being the skeleton in the GameWorks base count? Can I say he's smart just not conventionally smart? Like he can hotwire a car and picked up some German thanks to a certain nuclear sandworm and can aim with perfect accuracy despite having poor vision, but he can't read or do math or write or-

Song I associate with them:

I. Have an entire playlist for him. Whoopsies. ANYWAYS. Grief from The Devil's Carnival (ive never listened to the musical i just found it in a playlist a while back) and Still Here by Digital Daggers. Mostly Grief tho. But like. It's from Sado's perspective about Rust. If that makes sense

Favourite Picture of them:

His steam emoji <33333

It looks even goofier on my phone bc of how blurred it is

#the hex #rust mcclain #other characters mentioned but im not listing em all #scov.txt #hey did i mention i love rust /j

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idfuann · 3 years ago

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I see you like Doctor who. So may I present to you with the idea of Time Lord!Joel with his crazy group of companions. Mayhaps Aleksi, seen he joins the latest, being also a Time Lord but he just isn't aware of it??

oh my god, anon, oh my god

listen, i would've thought niko as the obvious choice to be the time lord out of this group but i'm not opposed to joel either.

i got so many IDEAS right off the bat.

joel has always loved earth and the music on earth (the people can be annoying, though). one day he finds himself in a underground venue watching a band competition, he's enjoying it and the band that's currently playing is kinda good, but oh come on, not again - why does the drummer of the band have a fucking dalek piece in his drumset??

so of course joel, even if he actually doesn't want to deal with it, deals with it. maybe not in a good way, as he just marches to the kid as he's taking apart the set and grabs the piece out of his hands and then demands to know where he got it from, but he still deals with it.

the kid has bought it online (supposedly) and doesn't know where it came from (supposedly) but all of his friends are looking kind of embarrassed and scared and joel's like

ok cool now can you tell me the truth about where you got this alien item so i can go back to space with my spaceship

and the guitarist of the band is so amazed by the information of aliens and spaceships that he just spills the beans. apparently they had found half of a dalek somewhere in some abandoned warehouse and it's now in his garage

and joel is like 😑 god humans are stupid

so anyway, they deal with the dalek without any worse incidents (thankfully) but the guitarist is really wants to see his spaceship and joel is like, oh fucking fine, this once

so he has a group of fucking kids following him to his tardis like a huddle of ducks

"do you have a pool in here????" <- first thing joonas says when they step inside, probably

so joel shows them space but just this once, okay, you're all just kids and they all agree, though the guitarist makes him promise he comes back when the band is big and famous

it's a week later for joel when he next visits earth, but more than seven years has passed on earth

he parks at the same spot he did before, on the venue parking lot, and is straight away faced with a poster on a familiar sounding band. was it blind channel the kids had called themselves??

and he's like, no fucking way, and the date on the poster is that day and there is already a line outside and joel goes fuck it and goes to check it out

and it is them, and they have found themselves a fifth member! how crazy is that!

and joel is meaning to just watch the show and leave without them noticing him, but as he's trying to sneak back to where his tardis is parked, the guitarist is standing outside with a cig in his hands, leaning on the tardis' wall

"i knew you'd be back"

"i promised, didn't i?"

so he agrees to come backstage to see the others, because why the hell not, and at least they are adults this time

and they tell him all about what's been going on while he was gone, about meeting the new member (aleksi, he calls himself) and about the success they made in some tv show

aleksi apparently has heard the story of joel, but he seems to believe it only now

and the guitarist asks if he'd show them planets this time as well and joel can't bring himself to say no to company, so he shows them planets this time, he shows them old festivals and the future, and he brings them back to earth just in time for their next show

(and maybe aleksi has a wrist watch with gallifreyan script on it.)

#i have so many brainworms about this now #and i'd write a complete fic but anon i feel like there would be only me and you excited for it #so enjoy this at least #blind channel

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blueheartedmayor · 3 years ago

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Uno reverse card

Behind closed doors for Dante and Moira :3c

Behind Closed Doors (I reblogged it once for all three accounts but it's accepted here too. It'll be super slow though.)

@xshatteredreflectionsx

It was a formal gathering, but one a little different from the ones Damien would have to attend. It was hosted by a dear patron, and the atmosphere was light and cheerful. It was a breath of fresh air for all the guests. Anything was better than those stuffy events where every answer is a move on an unseen chess board.

In fact, Moira was enjoying herself. As Damien's plus-one, she was an outsider to the group, yet had found herself tugged onto the dancefloor by an older gentleman who was surprisingly agile for his age. Damien watched on from the bar, amusement playing on his lips, before the host approached him.

"I didn't think you would ever bring a guest to one of my parties, Damien." She claimed the bar stool beside him. "Here was me thinking you would never share that secret with me." Of course, she was only teasing him, knowing that the reason was not as nefarious as she was making it out to be.

"I do know that, Margaret. And truthfully, I've been meaning to bring Moira to one of these for some time. She's simply been very busy, and I would hate to distract her from her work. It's taken a lot for her to get this far."

They both turned their attention to the dancefloor in time to see the lawyer of the hour being spun around in an ungraceful, clumsy manner.

"You two met through work, I take it?"

"No, no. She's an old friend from university. The first friend I'd made for myself, by myself. I don't know where I would be without her. She has seen me at my best, and at my worst. She taught me how to live beyond the confines of the world I grew up in. She helped me see that there was still good in people; that I wasn't 'odd' like I always thought. She even bore witness to me being intoxicated for the first time, and relentlessly made fun of me the morning after when I couldn't lift my head off the table." His smile was sweet and more sentimental. "If I'm honest, there's no one I'd rather have by my side, and that's even beating my own sister out of that position."

"She sounds like a keeper."

"I suppose you could say that. She's my best friend, and she means more to me than anyone else in the whole world." Dark brown eyes were focused on the attempted dancing. No one had fallen, and that was a miracle. But he missed the way Margaret gave a breathless laugh and rolled her eyes. Oh dear...

BONUS:

"Permit me the opportunity to avoid some sort of 'story' to set the scene as is the norm here. Not only would it be forced, it would be wholly fake. I think it would be better to be honest with you directly. I wouldn't dream of speaking any of this out loud to anyone.

I loved her. I'm sure the choice of story prior to this showed as much. But I was a fool who was oblivious to the meaning of the messages drumming in his heart. I grew up in a loveless family environment. Love stared me in the face and I didn't do a thing about it. I felt this - this warmth in my chest when I was with her. I didn't understand fully what it meant. Instead, I channelled it into something platonic - or fooled myself into thinking it was familial, as was the case with the only friends I had ever known. Everything would be alright, if she was there. That's how it felt, anyway.

Choices were a luxury for me. I knew I wanted my life partner to be my decision, and no one else's. Mayhaps that was why I didn't see the obvious. There were so many risks in a relationship that had to be secret to the whole world. I was already scared of losing her friendship if my parents met her and deemed her 'unworthy'. It would have increased tenfold if that relationship had differed.

Now... Nothing would ever happen. Even if - even if somehow I can undo these disasters that have happened to her, it won't change what I did. I don't deserve her forgiveness, and I definitely don't deserve her love - if she even still saw me that way. And even if she did... I'm not even sure I have yet regained the ability to feel love. Regaining your own sense of self and your humanity is a slower process that simply snapping out of a trance. That's a tale for another time, I'm sure. Or, maybe it won't be.

To get back on track... If there was one thing I wished I could do, it would be to go back with a message. Not to warn myself of the manor. Not to tell Moira to feign illness to guilt me into leaving early the morning after... But I would go back to the university days. I would tell myself to run away with her. My family would not have been able to hunt me as I had feared they would. I could have disappeared, became a nobody, and learned to live as - well, as someone ought to. Mayhaps feel a proper sense of freedom for the first time in my miserable existence.

All I can do is try and find a way to liberate her. I know it won't magically undo a century of torment that was caused by my hands. I know it won't set everything right. But at the very least it will allow two people to feel like they can try and get their lives back on track."

#xshatteredreflectionsx #( :D )

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milkacchan · 5 years ago

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Request for @bnhakaminari : Hi! How are you? May I please request Bakusquad x Omega!Reader headcanons? Maybe she's like their only omega? 🥺 It doesn't have to be female pronouns if you don't want! Also, I'm sorry if this request is weird! Thank you so so much and I hope you have a nice day/night!

Idk if you wanted poly so I did poly bc I physically can not resist poly

And it's not weird bc I really do love me some omegaverse.

Mayhaps I'll do a part 2 nsfw

• Baby GURL you're the only omega

• And thank god you are their omega

• Because all of them are Alphas

• Which can be hard to deal with

• Bevause while theyre friends, really good friends, they're still Alphas and that can get messy sometimes

• None of them are particularly aggressive with their instincts but if we have to list it it'd go

1. Bakugou

2. Mina

3. Kirishima

4. Denki

5. Sero

• In order for them to be genuinely aggressive it has to be deep rut or someone is trying to hurt their omega

• But tensions can get high since it's a bunch if alphas together all the time, they can but heads

• You're drawn to Sero and Mina first

• Sero's just really calm and down to earth and he's funny

• He's easy to be around and he smells /great/

• Its just strong enough to be calming but not overwhelming

• Mina kinda just started bothering you when you transferred in because you were pretty and you were a girl.

• Actually, Mina saw you when she was with Sero and she was like, 'that one. I want that one.'

• And Sero was immediately on board like yes we want thay one

• Your room is right next to hers

• This ends in her just being an annoying neighbor but you don't really mind because its mina and how could you not love her

• Then without really anything being said you're integrated into the Bakusquad and it's great

• Kirishima is bubbly and smiley

• Denki is just happy theres another girl

• and you're pretty so win

• Bakugou seems a little skeptic at first- unsure of where this is going but he's civil and quickly warms up to you

• Its unspoken that they take on a protective role

• Someone's giving you shit? At least one of them are there to back you up. Most of the time its Bakugou. It doesn't matter where in the room he is, he's by your side in seconds to ward off whatever BS the person in front of

• You're feeling sad? They're all there cuddling you so you feel better. They turn your ass into a burrito.

• Denki is already pulling out the memes

• You're super excited about something? They listen as you ramble warm smiles on their faces

• They'll play with your hair, massage your scalp until your purring against it

• They have a way with you and it's obvious to everyone around them

• They are MAGIC at calming you down

• If you're upset or frustrated at a training exercise, they each have their own ways to help.

• Kiri is a softer alpha in general. Along with Sero they were both raised in house holds where they were taught being an Alpha doesnt excuse being aggressive or wreckless.

• Seros mother was a beta

• Kirishimas mother was an Alpha who was raised with Betas.

• Kiri is often holding your hand in public if you get anxious

• Or letting you lean against him when you're tired or upset

• Most people think the two of you are established but you're not

• Sero absolutely gives you his jacket if you get cold

• Minas super cuddly and touchy all the time regardless of why so more often than not she's clinging to you

• That is if she's not busy making googoo eyes at you

• Need a laugh?

• Need a laugh so hard you're wheezing and struggling to breathe?

• Five minutes. That's all the time Denki needs.

• Crackheads tm

• What's even better is when yall get together when you're both sleep deprived

• It concerns the rest of the group

• and they're curious as to why you two are curled up on the floor laughing so hard you're crying over a picture of CHEESE

• But that's what happening

• Bakugous way of showing he diesnt hate you rn is

1. Buying you food occasionally

2. Helping you train

3. Offering to study with you

• But he can be really soft too

• Like that one time you just weren't having a good day and he carried you mid breakdown to your room

• You had your legs wrapped around his waist, face buried in the back of his neck as your arms were wrapped tightly around his chest

• Being the only omega in the group, they dote on you even before they ask to offically court you

• Oh you wanted that food? A few dollars short? Dont worry baby Bakugous got you

• You want to listen to a song? Kaminari "Everyone shut the FUCK up so she can hear," Denki

• You want attention? You genuinely dont even have to ask they know

• AS I SAID BEFORE THEY WILL PLAY WITH YOUR HAIR AS MUCH AS POSSIBLE

• ESPECIALLY UNTIL YOU'RE PURRING

• S c e n t i n g

• You realize they all pretty much smell the same as a result of scenting

• And the omega definitely comes out when they scent you (even before courtship)

• They take turns scenting you

• Each time your eyes flutter close and your grip their shirt as your cheeks burn

• But it's so nice

• And you've never really been scented

• And you're leaning into the touch, Keening at them, just completely content with your place

• And they're fawning over it

• They love it

• Thus enters this weird phase where yall might be a thing but theres no offical courting

• but theres hands and scenting and you're pretty sure Mina almost kissed you the other day

• Its a lil confusing but thays okay

• When I say you're unaware that the four Alphas are a thing

• I mean you're obliviously unaware

• You just thought they were affectionate friends

• Because some friendships are very affectionate

• And then, they ALL bring you small courting gifts and

• At the same time

• And it clicks

• Fuck they're all wearing necklaces

• THE SAME NECKLACE

• Oh

• OH

• "You want me to be everyone's omega,"

"If you're okay with it, and you like all of us, then yes."

• and obviously you're okay with it

• who wouldn't be.

• Its 10/10 lemme tell you

• you help ease tension sometimes

• Using your own pheromones or gentle touches just like they do w you

• They have uncovered another way of calming you down

• Food.

• "She's mad again," Denki whines

"Give her an apple or sumn,"

"No, you dumb bitch. Chocolate,"

"Why don't we just take her out to eat??"

"BINGO."

• They steal kisses whenever they can

• and I mean

• WHENEVER

• Onviously if youre not okay w PDA they'll lean of that ut other than that your lips are not safe

• When you go through your first heat with them, it KILLS them.

• The top floor is used for omegas when they go into heats

• Which isnt super often because if suppressants (which most omegas take,) but sometimes the suppressants get salt

• Alpha ruts are contained to their own dorms, they don't have a separate floor

• But anyway, your suppressants wear off :)

• And they learn that your heats are particularly painful

• Because they can smell the distress and frustration in the fucking stairwell

• And they /cant/ help and it /sucks/ because they want to help /so bad/

• Expect lots of kisses and hugs and cuddles when your heat is over

• And Denki crying because he missed you

• And Eijirou holding your waist as you lean against his chest

• Listen just expect a lot of affection and love in general

• Lots of touches and kisses

• Lots of sharing scented clothes too

• They'll scent just about anything you ask them too, not questions asked

• And they melt when they see you using whatever it is

• They're best alphas tm

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katierosefun · 4 years ago

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no one asked for it, but a list of...things i’ve been reading / watching / listening that isn’t star wars, and this def. isn’t the content anyone asked for, but i need some kind of posting system to get this out of the way otherwise i will just sit in a pent-up ball of energy, so...no one asked, but a list of things i read / watched / listened to in april 2021 and super enjoyed and etc:

kdrama: penthouse

i’ve talked a little bit about this kdrama here, but when i tell you i’ve become mildly obsessed with this kdrama...i’ve become mildly obsessed. it’s about these rich families and everything they’re doing to achieve power/stay in power. the characters are all so very complex, and i honestly can’t describe too much more of the kdrama just because it’s so bonkers, but if you like a good revenge plot, this is...def. the kdrama to watch.

movie: your name

ngl, i cried a lot watching this movie. like, i think i cried...at least three times? basically, this movie is about these two people who keep waking up in each other’s bodies, and things get even more complicated from there. this movie really utilizes the japanese myth of the red string of fate, and it’s really lovely. i didn’t think i’d care for it, but i fell in love. also, the soundtrack is amazing. also, just...there’s something so beautiful about two people just being tied together by some twist of fate. very romantic, also very much a coming-of-age story too. i am honestly so blown away by it, not to mention the beautiful animation.

podcast: me & au

i’ve talked about this podcast ad nauseum here, but like.......ugh no the way this is literally one of the cutest audio drama podcasts ever. it’s just about two fanfic writing gals, and it’s really cute. also really very gay. also really cute. i literally have listened to the last episode 4 times because i can’t get over how adorable they are.

documentary: paris is burning

so i actually watched this documentary for a class, and i’m glad i watched it. this documentary goes into the drag queen scene in 1980s new york. like, idk i don’t really know transgender history, and i feel like it’s just important to learn. i honestly felt kind of sad watching this documentary, mostly because you see a lot of folks talking about their dreams of wealth and comfort, while you, as a 21st century audience member, know that that’s just...really hard for trans folks to procure. there’s some more complicated history behind this documentary, i think, but overall i think it’s an important piece to watch if you want to learn more about your queer history and also just how the black and latinx community really contributed and made up a lot of the queer world we know today.

music: oh boy. so much music.

i mean, y’all know i have to mention fearless (taylor’s version) for the obvious reasons, but i’ve genuinely enjoyed?? this?? version?? i was afraid that it wouldn’t feel the same and that i’d want the nostalgia factor, but like...the nostalgia factor is still there. and taylor’s voice has def. improved, and like,,,now i can’t really listen to the old fearless? mayhaps blasphemous, but i really enjoy taylor’s matured voice, and just hearing her now handle the notes that she might have struggled with as a teenager just makes me :’)) because wow, look at how far she’s come.

i’ve also been really in love with girl in red’s debut album if i could make it go quiet, again for the obvious reasons. it’s really a wonderful debut album, and i’m so in love with girl in red’s sounds because she can really go from soft and quiet to just hard-hitting, clashing sounds but in a good way? my favorite track has to be did you come? just because of how much it just slaps. it’s bitter, but it’s the kind of bitter that makes you feel like....satisfied. idk how else to explain it lol. i’m also a big fan of midnight love, because it’s quiet, but it’s also...very sad. very much a song you’d listen to at 2 am alone in your bedroom.

but i guess my fave for the month has to be this lovely playlist of all the classical music in barbie movies, specifically the ballet ones. listen......listen, let me just re-live my childhood, okay? barbie movies slap, actually, and i’m really glad that it got me to appreciate this music more.

and, last but not least...i’ve been mildly obsessed with from the new world, which is, yes, another classical piece, and yes, it was also in a barbie movie, but it was also used in the kdrama penthouse, and i’ve been mildly obsessed with all of the parts, because ooooh boy, you want to feel like a princess dancing alone in a ballroom as the world burns? you want to feel like you just murdered some elite in their bedroom? bro--

and i’ve also talked about this piece, but i’ve been mildly obsessed with vivaldi’s winter, just because...okay yeah no penthouse has somehow renewed my love and interest in classical music, and i’ve already discussed how this piece unleashes some feral feeling inside of me, but like...BRO WHY DOES THIS PIECE SLAP SO HARD. i know this is hardly news and this is hardly a rec because this piece is so well-known, and you’ve most certainly heard it at least once, but like...........no i’m about to become insufferable with my love for classical music again send help

and those are all my main recs for the month of april! clearly, my brain’s been going nuts. i will be back at the end of may for......more of this nonsense, if people are so willing to read my rants about things that aren’t star wars related lmao

#caroline recs #one (1) person asked for this and that is kira and you shall now recieve #it's like 11 am and i should actually get started with my da lmao #i did one (1) other task before this so i'm counting this as a warranted break #but anyways yes thank u you will probably see more of this nonsense later this month asdfdsf #to everyone's surprise: i watch things that aren't just star wars related!

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roc-thoughtblog · 4 years ago

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Sense and Sensibility Readthrough Part 7.5

Or, where I was gonna start chapter 11, but needed to talk about why I thought Willoughby's observation was wrong.

And then, of course, I turned it into something really long, so that's taken up my reading session today. (I still haven't finished writing my thoughts on Narrative Voice either, because it has gotten loooong.)

Anyway.

"Brandon is just the kind of man," said Willoughby one day, when they were talking of him together, "whom everybody speaks well of, and nobody cares about; whom all are delighted to see, and nobody remembers to talk to."

Elinor is right, here, that Willoughby is demonstrably wrong in his assessment of Colonel Brandon's social activity. It's not merely the fact that Elinor herself has taken an interest in Brandon enough, but simply the fact that Willoughby's claim that nobody remembers to talk to Brandon, is predicated on Willoughby himself dismissing the existence/value of the Middletons in general. It's not true that Brandon is not spoken to, it's that he's not spoken to by an arbitrary class of people whom Willoughby thinks matters, such as Willoughby, Marianne and Elinor, which he himself is a part of.

> "That he is patronised by you," replied Willoughby, "is certainly in his favour; but as for the esteem of the others, it is a reproach in itself. Who would submit to the indignity of being approved by such a woman as Lady Middleton and Mrs. Jennings, that could command the indifference of anybody else?"

We know the Middletons speak to him, because Willoughby himself admits it, but we also know from his own words that they don't count, only Elinor does. In fact, he considers them a negative. Social noise. Detractors by association even, a bad or shallow crowd. I wouldn't be surprised is he considers servants here also. After all, Marianne has already said as much in her statements around being 27, and we're lead to believe they share perspective on most things. Were it to be that Colonel Brandon was comfortable and sociable with the Middletons' maids and butlers, I think Willoughby would still consider him an unfortunate case.

And importantly, we know that the Middletons don't restrict themselves to just speaking with him, they also do care about him and his problems. Elinor has referenced that Sir Middleton clearly knows about whatever has troubled his history, and does have an investment in seeing the man socialise. Mrs. Jennings, for all her misplaced enthusiasm, does have an interest in his romantic life or woes as it may be. Just because these cares are aligned with their own interests of socialising and matchmaking, doesn't invalidate them. (Can't say much for Lady Middleton but the narrative has ventured that Lady Middleton specifically is a little cold outside the topic of her own children.) And, you know, who knows what other friends Brandon may have. We aren't him. He was even a Colonel, he must at least have military mates.

We see the Middletons as very flawed individuals because the narrative has framed them this way. Sir Middleton is ignorant, Lady Middleton is self-absorbed and Mrs. Jennings is shallow; on this line we're also expected to dismiss their value as individuals and friends at least slightly, the same way Willoughby and Marianne do.

But really, we can turn that assessment straight around, on Marianne in particular. She can be considered narrow-minded and dismissive. Arrogant perhaps, maybe even cold to people who are unfamiliar to her. As self-absorbed as Lady Middleton, perhaps, or as shallow as Mrs. Jennings. She's not so different, but she gets a pass inside the story for being young and pretty, and out of story for being the protagonist. It's easier to dismiss her flaws because they are presented, but not highlighted. But, again, we can turn that back around for the Middletons! If perhaps Brandon were the protagonist, would Mrs. Jennings have the same cheerful warmth as Mama Middleton? Maybe Lady M does care, but is simply detached like Elinor? There is certainly nobody in the story as genuinely generous and well-meaningly sociable as Sir M.

How might the Dashwoods appear then? Elinor might be cold, disinteresting, even if she shows some care. Marianne, pretty but vain and shallow; friendly, but mayhap just as likely to ask somebody to sing a song she just heard, or to bulldoze somebody with her opinions. Mama Dashwood might even appear as self-absorbed in her own family as Lady M; she made a point not to socialise beyond walking distance.

Either way, my point being, they are not so different. Watch Willoughby or anyone, including herself, give Marianne the time of day if she were older or dumpier! Or a servant! Is my statement here to mean that noone will give her attention? No, actually. Plenty of nice, genuine, and flawed people will anyway. Just that Willoughby and Marianne themselves, and anybody with that particular flaw of pride, would not.

So, yeah! Willoughby's observation was incorrect, and very myopic really. Such is youth, except come on man, Marianne is 17 but you're my age. You should know better! Man's definitely coasted on some social privilege his whole life and it shows.

"I do not dislike him. I consider him, on the contrary, as a very respectable man, who has everybody's good word, and nobody's notice; who, has more money than he can spend, more time than he knows how to employ, and two new coats every year."

I think Willoughby genuinely considers himself to not dislike Brandon. After all, he doesn't hate him, and he knows he has no reason to dislike him. I think Willoughby is the type of person who genuinely considers themselves to not dislike anyone, because, again, he has no reason to. They don't matter to him in that way.

But I think his general attitude speaks for itself. After all, he does find Lady Middleton and Mrs. Jennings thoroughly disrespectable, even by association. He considers Brandon a respectable man, but only in the ways in which he considers Brandon to have potential to be amongst people like himself and Marianne. He otherwise has everything callous to say about the aspects of Brandon's personality and circumstance that keep him from joining what he perceives as a more lively and acceptable strata of sociability. He certainly takes no issue with Marianne's actual open dislike of the man. (Though, come to think of it, that may be at least in part Mrs. Jenning's fault for setting her on him through thoroughly inappropriate real-person-shipping.)

I do think Willoughby has a great, mostly unvoiced disdain for Brandon's crowd, and I think that disdain extends to Brandon himself for having just enough potential to escape it, but not doing so. I get flashbacks to cases like in To Kill a Mockingbird (and uh, real life...) where people don't think they're racist, but also quite obviously don't think anything of the black community, and also look down on anyone who associates with them, like the guy has to always pretend he's drunk, and Atticus Finch himself. Disliking other people is a bad thing that other people do! This case is probably nowhere near as serious, but it comes from similar places on basic levels. Exclusivity, tribalism, elitism, prejudice, ostracisation, from where deeper, deeper problems take root.

STATUS! That's a word that could have been useful to me but I haven't used.

Anyway, I take this perspective because it's not as though I wasn't there too at one point, though absolutely nowhere near the extent of Marianne or Willoughby. I certainly didn't hold those conscious opinions, but I still felt the pressure to define the boundaries of people I should befriend, and I did unjustifiably dismiss people who I thought were dismissable by arbitrary social standards I didn't even understand. And for what? After all, I was exactly the same type of arbitrarily dismissable person! I was a weird kid! Weird kids are not socially prestigious material!

It's strange how easily ingrained that arbitrary-social-boundary-drawing is. Seriously, where exactly are children getting it from? Answer’s probably obvious but I’m already going too long.

I think, it's a very important thing to unlearn. If not least because it's a source of very deep societal problems, it can also potentially be another thing that leads somebody into a situation of, "everybody speaks well of, and nobody cares about; whom all are delighted to see, and nobody remembers to talk to." Not because noone cares or wants to speak to them, but because they've arbitrarily blinded themselves to people who do! There will of course be Willoughbys and Mariannes who don't care about you and think little of you, but at the end of the day they're a minority, and in terms of social interaction they're really no different from every other Middleton who might genuinely care.

It's ironically a fate that will most likely to hit hardest a Marianne or Willoughby who falls from social grace. After all, if they lose whatever privilege of personality or appearance, wealth or youth that keeps them afloat, they'd have noone to care about them or to talk to! Just lots and lots of Middletons, or probably worse. And befriending those people would involve, gasp, lowering your social standards! Descending to the level of people whom you have implicitly thought to have been beneath you this whole time! And now you've become a Brandon, who is old, and most unfortunately boring, and who only interacts with the Middletons, who don't count.

What a terrible fate!

Final Thoughts: So yeah, I think Willoughby was wrong, and also I think he's more than a little disdainful. He's definitely the kind of guy who has always had the luxury of arbitrarily making his choice of social affiliation, and has never had to challenge his prejudices. If he thinks nobody wants to talk to Brandon, well, on top of not being correct, he's also quite satisfied to play his own role in Brandon's perceived ostracisation. Not saying you are obligated to socialise with people whom you don’t have any interest in, but man, there’s no reason to do ‘em like that.

Wait, I've definitely used both the words pride and prejudice in this tangent. Hmm.

Anyway, making friends, and especially connecting with them, can be hard, but Brandon at least seems to be doing fine. The kids just have a superiority complex.

#Sense and Sensibility #Jane Austen #readthrough #novels #Colonel Brandon #john willoughby #Marianne Dashwood #but also if you need someone to talk to and care for a few minutes #you can send me a message #can't promise to stick around because i'm an internet voice with my own life to get to but sometimes you just need a little to scrape by #1700 words #yep i went long

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wiinterrose · 5 years ago

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( xavier serrano , male , he/him, 23 ) omg ! i was walking yonge street downtown , and you’ll never guess who i saw . 𝐌𝐈𝐂𝐇𝐀𝐄𝐋 𝐅𝐋𝐎𝐑𝐄𝐒 ! i just saw a post about them on sixsecrets ! i think it said something like “ 𝐌𝐈𝐊𝐄𝐘 𝐅𝐋𝐎𝐑𝐄𝐒 𝐒𝐏𝐎𝐓𝐓𝐄𝐃 𝐋𝐄𝐀𝐕𝐈𝐍𝐆 𝐅𝐀𝐌𝐎𝐔𝐒 𝐀𝐂𝐓𝐎𝐑'𝐒 𝐇𝐈𝐆𝐇𝐑𝐈𝐒𝐄 𝐀𝐓 𝟓 𝐀𝐌 : 𝐑𝐎𝐌𝐀𝐍𝐂𝐄 𝐎𝐑 𝐘𝐄𝐓 𝐀𝐍𝐎𝐓𝐇𝐄𝐑 𝐅𝐋𝐈𝐍𝐆 ?” . isn’t that wild ? i guess it makes sense through , since they’re apparently 𝐃𝐔𝐏𝐋𝐈𝐂𝐈𝐓𝐎𝐔𝐒 and 𝐂𝐔𝐍𝐍𝐈𝐍𝐆 . but i’ve heard they’re also 𝐎𝐏𝐓𝐈𝐌𝐈𝐒𝐓𝐈𝐂 and 𝐂𝐇𝐀𝐑𝐈𝐒𝐌𝐀𝐓𝐈𝐂 ! i’ll just stick to giving them the benefit of the doubt . i mean , it’s not like i know them personally — they’re a famous 𝐏𝐑𝐎𝐅𝐄𝐒𝐒𝐈𝐎𝐍𝐀𝐋 𝐃𝐀𝐍𝐂𝐄𝐑 / 𝐘𝐎𝐔𝐓𝐔𝐁𝐄𝐑 ! you know , i’ve actually heard rumors that ██████████████████, but they’re just rumors … i think . i dunno . if you happen to run into them , tell them i’m their biggest fan ! ( ollie , they / them , 21 , est )

𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐒𝐓𝐎𝐑𝐘

— mikey was born and raised in winnipeg because i think it’s funny when characters are from winnipeg. if you’re from winnipeg i’m so sorry. definitely was born on the coldest day of that year ( so like some point in january )

— but because of those long, cold harsh winters, mikey found himself in a dance studio a lot. his aunt was a dance teacher and with rather absent parents who meant well but both had long hours at the local hospital, he spent a lot of time with her. he fell in love with dance pretty early on, always having a certain fluidity and grace even when he was young.

— random but he also played hockey up until he was like 16 or whatever because he’s canadian and i’m not stupid. it happened. he can still skate tho. in a slightly different life he probably would have been a pretty good figure skater huh 🤔🤔🤔 but anyway...

— also feel like it makes sense that he did gymnastics. and trained in classical ballet.

— he went to university of toronto for college, studying kinesology and dance, and danced at one of the prestigious studios in the city.

— his big break moment was when in his sophomore year at ut, he made it onto the second season of world of dance in early 2017 ( lets pretend that show has been on longer than it has bc i don’t want it to be the first season of it sldk ). he made it all the way to the finals and quickly become a fan favorite along the way. though he ultimately placed second and missed out on the million dollars, that was the beginning of many doors opening for him. ( for those who, might have the vaguest clue what i’m talking about : i’m highkey feeling like, michael dameski style which is an idea i had after i named him michael so don’t @ me for him having the same first name ).

— millions watched that show, including some prominent agents and scouts who were able to help him launch a professional dance career : something he never thought he’d see himself actually doing. his first big gig was making the dance team for some singer’s north american tour, and he ended up not returning to ut to pursue a professional dance career full time. since then he’s danced in a few music videos for some uber famous musican ( same one he went on tour with or not idk ?? also a wc ?? maybe ?? ), a tv show, couple movies, and other various gigs around the city. he works part time at a studio when he has time, and has been honing his choreography skills as well.

— he makes enough dancing, but certainly not enough to make him RICH. no, that come from an impromptu vlog he did while on tour with aforementioned singer. having already garnered a following from world of dance, he soon rose to youtube fame as well, something he never could have predicted. i feel like his videos are very just, day in a life with various random challenges mixed in, and various workout and flexibility tips. he also still does pieces and duets with other prominent dancers just for fun too. his natural charisma and attitude really just carries him through easily lmao.

— mikey developed a bit of a habit of sleeping around when he left for college, all the newfound freedom was just intoxicating and well. he was hot so. it wasn’t like it was hard alsdkjf. that stuck around well into his blossoming dance career. nothing that was enough to be scandalous, but he made his way around. and then a year and a half into this unforeseen new life, he met matthew glass.

— he’d had a couple serious relationships before, one in high school, one his freshman year of college but neither of them could hold a flame to what he felt when he was with matt. perfection wasn’t something mikey believed in, but he almost did with what they had.

— it was like for over a year and a half he lived in this insane dream, and then mikey and matt broke up and he was devastated ( behind closed doors and with curtains pulled tightly shut ).

— he then proceeded to broadcast how perfectly fine he was doing by going back to his old ways and sleeping around obsessively, this time with very little regard as to how many headlines he was making. as far as coping mechanisms go, i guess sex is better than alcohol ?? not to say he wasn’t also drunk at times l o l.

𝐌𝐈𝐒𝐂

— mikey is a... how do u say... im gunna write manwhore bc it’s accurate so pls don’t take offense. inch resting bc i’ve written smut like once in my eight year rping career but that’s what he decided he was gunna be and who am i to deny that.

— very bi. very much does not care. if the world didn’t know he was before, it definitely does now lmao. he hasn’t come out in the sense he’s like posted a video about it and said “i’m bisexual” but it’s pretty obvious from the media and maybe he has gotten asked in interviews and has just shrugged and been like does it matter ?? i’m sorry he’s not the vocal bi ally we need. perhaps we will work on that.

— hasn’t dated anyone since matt bc he’s highkey lowkey still hung up on him but no one needs to know that right. outwardly, he’s very much the same : seemingly happy, but he’s a lot more careful with his heart and letting people close to him. if anything he’s become a bit of a two-way mirror, always seeing out but never really letting people see in, just what they want to see.

— probably goes without saying but extremely flexible. idk if any of you know who juuse saros is but apparently he can twerk in a split and i’m not saying mikey can but like. he just might be able to...

— straight up does not get cold. never wears more than a hoodie, probably danced shirtless in the middle of winter just fine. at least being from winnipeg is good for one ( 1 ) thing.

— i feel like people call him flower. idk guys. maybe im just thinking too much abt hockey goalies.

𝐏𝐄𝐑𝐒𝐎𝐍𝐀𝐋𝐈𝐓𝐘

— he tends to be extremely underestimated as he comes across a bit dumb and generally has a pretty positive outlook on life which people confuse for him being naive when that isn’t the case. but he’s found he can use that it his advantage and that sometimes, people will tell him things they think he can’t understand but he hears and remembers everything. it’s helped him out of a few difficult situations before.

— i feel like he has a bit of ethan dolan’s personality & dumbass energy idk guys...

— live in the moment kind of dude. his motto is probably like : you just gotta know what you want to do next. i mean looking back on his life it’s been pretty crazy and that’s only solidified his outlook that like, you really can’t control too much. just let it go where it takes you.

— people do like him though and they like talking to him for whatever reason. generally has pretty trustworthy vibes but he’s more slippery than he comes across. he’s a selfish person at heart and always has his own best interests in mind, even if it doesn’t seem that way at first.

— extroverted. i think ??

𝐀𝐏𝐏𝐄𝐀𝐑𝐄𝐍𝐂𝐄

— 6′1″. chocolate brown eyes. curly brown hair. he has a lithe but extremely fit build due to his career. his core strength is especially impressive.

— he has a monochromatic lineart tattoo of a rose on his left forearm / wrist and a butterfly ( again monochromatic & just lineart ) on his right shoulder. small scar at the base of his neck by his ear from an unfortunate hockey accident.

— needs glasses but usually only wears contacts unless he’s in his apartment late at night.

— he’s not overly fashionable, going more for comfort than how he generally looks. on a regular day, he’s probably got the whole... college athlete look going if you know what i mean. a big fan of mirrored aviator sunglasses. wouldn’t know what dressing up meant even if it slapped him in the face.

𝐖𝐀𝐍𝐓𝐄𝐃 𝐂𝐎𝐍𝐍𝐄𝐂𝐓𝐈𝐎𝐍𝐒

first and foremost i want to say that i like to vibe and brainstorm with people to come up with unique connections between our characters but here are a few ideas:

— the singer whose tour he danced on — singer whose music videos he’s been in — mayhaps even actors for that tv show / movie he was in ( v small role but whatevs. maybe they just Vibed yknow ) — flirtationship 😔 — always ye ol good hookup l o l — we keep running into each other idk maybe we should talk ??

TAKEN CONNECTIONS PAGE HERE

𝐎𝐎𝐂

hey guys, i’m ollie. my intros are either written really eloquently or a big mess bc im trying to rub together a couple braincells at 1 am and whatever comes out, comes out. no need to guess which category this one falls into lmAO. anyway, i’m a slow plotter bc i’m easily overwhelmed trying to do too many things at once but i swear i will try to get to as many people as i can. and yeah this entire character is inspired by my love of world of dance don’t @ me... if u made it all the way down here u should watch this bc 😳 & mikey has the same athleticism and strength.

#sixhqintro #( so....#this be a hot mess !!!!#but..#he's here lmao #hmu )#( im going to sleep soon bc it's almost 2 am and i have work tomorrow lmao )

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btsrmono · 5 years ago

Text

Trial & Error | chapter 2

Main Pairing: (jimin): student/idol x (main): foreign student

Side Pairs: main x taehyung,, main x (nct) jaehyun

Part 1

CHAPTER 2

A good few weeks had passed and you only made a small group of friends. They didn't seem to be anyone you’d ever grow close to though they were nice people. You mainly stuck to having Jinsoul as your best friend in Korea. You guys hung out all the time and she helped you study Korean, boosting your skills in communication. You were really grateful and thanks to her, you seemed to meet a lot of new people outside of your school. Based off of what you’ve observed, Jinsoul was very popular.

"What are you doing tomorrow?" she had asked.

You looked up from your notebook to her lying at the foot of your bed. "I don't know, probably nothing or hanging out with you, as usual. Why?"

"Well, I was invited somewhere and I don't want to go by myself." Jinsoul was always doing something crazy like auditioning to become a trainee or going to a party and there you were, always getting dragged to places you didn't want to go because of her.

"Um, maybe I'll take a rain check this week," you replied, not really feeling in the mood.

She laughed while slightly rolling her eyes. "It's not what you think," she informed you. "I actually have a date."

You completely stopped focusing on your literature homework and wondered what she'd possibly want you to go on a date with her for. "You're... asking me to .... be a third wheel? Are you really that nervous?"

"No, I'm not asking you to be a third wheel, but yes, I am very nervous."

"If you're not asking me to be a third wheel then what would you consider someone tagging along on a date?"

"You're not a third wheel because you're a forth wheel," she answered quickly.

You wasn't exactly sure what that was supposed to mean but you wasn't really up to questioning her.

"Please?" she begged.

".... I don't know, Jinsoul."

She sucked her teeth. "Jimin is going to be there," she uttered, making you completely freeze. A sly grin showed on her face. "You can't lie, I know you like him, it's written all over your face whenever you see him."

"I-I don't like him, I barely- I don't even know him," you stuttered. And it was true, you didn't like him. Did you think he was cute? Yeah. But you saw the way he flirted with other girls at the bus stop or at parties so you instantly was never attracted to him in that sense.

"Y/n," she pleaded. "I'll never ask you for a favor like this again. You said you owe me, remember?"

You sighed, considering it. "Well whose the guy that has you so hooked?"

She smiled, biting her lip shyly. "Jacob."

"Jacob?" you asked, shocked but not shocked. You could always tell she had a little something for him but from what you knew, he wasn’t single.

"Yeah." She sighed, the smile quickly fading. “I already know what you’re gonna say--”

"Doesn’t he have a whole girlfriend?" you cut her off.

Her shoulders slightly dropped. "That was a long time ago.”

“They were just making out at the bus stop after school last week.”

“Exactly. A long time ago!” You looked at her skeptically as she sighed heavily. “They just broke up, y/n. He's a really sweet guy, believe me. And I like him a lot. You'd find out for yourself if you go on this double date. And who knows," she added, "maybe you and Jimin might have a connection you never knew was there. You both lowkey have a thing for each other, if it's not obvious to you, you're blind." She then laid back down into a comfortable position on my bed. "Think about it, he's always staring at you."

You wasn't going to deny that but you always thought that maybe the boy just had staring issues. "If I say I'll go can we make a deal that you'll shut up about this for the rest of the day?"

Her eyes widened. "Of course! A million times, of course," she exclaimed. "Thank you, y/n!!"

~~~

Only 20 minutes into the date and everything was just completely awkward. At least between you and Jimin. Jinsoul and Jacob were hitting it off just great. A little too great. You and Jimin were both completely ignored and all you two really did at that point was watch the two flirt and giggle, completely immersed into their own conversation.

You looked out the booths window on the left side of you, watching people walk on by as your thoughts began to wonder, one hundred percent bored out of your mind. At that moment, you thought about home and how much you missed it. Those days, you were so caught up in your new life that you tended to neglect your past, not even caring to call back your friends due to your busy schedule and the time zone differences surely didn't help. It was hectic and even if they didn't think so, you felt sorry.

But alas, your thinking was interrupted when you heard Jacob suggest for him and Jinsoul to go play in the restaurants arcade. She then giggled, agreeing as they both stood up, not even caring to look back at you and Jimin. You guys were practically invisible to them and you were starting to get nervous. You had never been alone with Jimin, not that it was a big deal but there was just something about it that made you sweat.

You looked over at him just to find his eyes already glued to you with a smile on his face. But then he slowly turned away. And just like that, you guys sat in an awkward silence for a good solid minute or two, neither one of you saying anything or even checking your phones when, suddenly, he spoke up.

"I... sorry if this sounds weird but I just wanted to let you know that you look really pretty today."

This caught you off guard , causing you to hesitate and only sweat a little more. "Um... thank you," you said shyly. You had no idea what was wrong with you, you’re not usually like this with boys but something was different about Jimin-- not in a good way but not in a bad way either. It was just that he seemed intimidating.

He let out a chuckle. "Are you okay, y/n? You're not usually like this. This isn't the you I'm used to seeing."

You shrugged your shoulders, unsure of what to say. "I'm sorry," you apologized. "I just find this all to be a little awkward, you'd be lying if you said you didn't too."

"Yes, it's true," he admitted. "This is very awkward. The things we do for our friends, huh?” he chuckled. “But breaking the ice is the way to make this a little more natural, no?"

Nodding your head, you agreed. But the only problem was that you didn't know how to break the ice.

“What state are you from by the way? I wanna hear all about it.”

You kind of laughed. “It’s funny this hasn’t really come up in most of my conversations with people here. They just hear ‘America’ and it’s all they need.”

He shook his head, giggling a bit. “My love, haven’t they told you I’m not most people?”

“Well,” you sighed, clasping your hands together. “I’m from New York City.”

Jimin’s eyes lit up upon hearing this. “Whoa, the Big Apple. Very nice place, I’ve been a few times.”

“Oh, have you?”

“Eh, not to brag or anything. But let’s just say I’m well travelled.”

You laughed at his obvious cockiness. “It sucks I’m not from some place a bit smaller, I wish I could tell you about places you don’t know much about.”

“Are you kidding me?” he asked you, surprised by this statement. “Do you know how many people would kill to live in New York?”

You knew he was right but you couldn’t help but to feel this way. “I know,” you sighed. “But when you grow up there it just feels so... I don’t know.” You tried to think of the right words to describe your experience but you just couldn’t. “While I appreciate the diversity of people, everyone there is kind of the same in a sense.” He looked at you, truly interested in what you were saying. “We all strive to do our best in school to get into a top University and get a good job just to impress our peers and family... Nothing is authentic and we’re all miserable, really.”

He shook his head, showing that you had his full attention.

“You would think living in a place like New York would allow you to freely show your creativity and do what you want but, no. That’s what people move to New York but for people that live there, we don’t see the big dream when it’s been our whole life.” You began to think about all of the missed opportunities you had while trying to live for your parents instead of yourself. You began to think that maybe it was just you.

“I don’t know,” you continued. “I just feel like everyone is shallow and I’m living a cliche.”

He nodded. “Funny enough, I know what you’re talking about. It’s the same here. Luckily, I was able to pick my career path but it’s still pressure.”

You somehow knew what he meant. You saw the way everyone around you acted. It didn’t seem any easier to you than New York. Mayhap's the pressure in Korea was even worse. “I see,” you said. “Everyone here are such hard workers. I know it must be tough.”

He shook his head, agreeing with you, somber thoughts seeming to fill his mind as his eyes wandered off. “You okay?” you asked.

His eyes snapped back to yours. He paused before taking a good look at you, a smiling creeping back up on his face. “Of course I am, y/n.”

Luckily, Jimin was a talkative person who knew how to easily lighten the mood as he went on to tell you horror stories of what went on in his dorm. You got really comfortable around him pretty quickly. He was a fun person who was really chill and easy to get along with.

".... and that, my friend, is why you must always fill your ramen cup up to the indicated line." You laughed after hearing his story on how he almost blew up the dorms microwave. "I mean, I'll tell you," he continued, "Jin hyung was so mad, it was almost scary."

Eventually, time started going by slow and Jimin began to run out of stories. You both had finished your food and neither Jinsoul or Jacob bothered to come back. You guys had officially been sitting there for a little over 2 hours, the waiters even asking if you guys were ready to pay the bill--more than once--to which, Jimin ended up paying for.

You sighed, finally pulling your phone out for the first time in which felt like forever. Your cell lit up with multiple notifications that you didn't even feel like checking. You just wanted to occupy yourself with something.

As you scrolled through your Instagram timeline, you could feel Jimin's eyes on you. "What?" you asked him nonchalantly, still scanning your phone.

"It's funny," he started, "us two being here."

You quietly chuckled, finally looking at him. "What?"

"Were you dragged here?" he curiously wondered.

"'Dragged' is an overstatement, but yeah, she did kind of beg," you admitted. "Why? Weren't we both?"

"No. When he said you’d be here, I didn’t have a problem with coming."

You awkwardly paused before making a small "tsk" sound, scolding yourself mentally. He turned around to survey the area to which you found yourself staring at him in quiet awe. You wasn't going to lie to yourself by saying that Jimin wasn't your type but you had to remember why you were there to begin with. It sure as hell wasn't because he asked you to.

At that moment, you took a second to check the time. It was currently 9:31pm. You looked back up at Jimin whom was already looking at you. "It's getting late," you stated. "My parents will start to worry. I should get home soon."

He nodded his head, quickly agreeing. "Yeah, that's totally understandable. I should walk you."

You paused, unsure of what to say. You weren't exactly expecting him to offer something like that so it took you off guard a bit. "Um... that's okay, Jimin. I can walk alone, the bus stop is only a short block from here."

He sighed as he slowly began to make his way out of the booth standing. "Can you at least allow me to pay for a taxi home?"

You then proceed to stand as well, smirking slightly. "A taxi? If you insist... But please let Jinsoul know where I went. I will text her as well but I'm sure she's not checking her phone anytime soon."

He smiles, tilting his head a bit. "Totally. And you know something, I really had a good time with you."

You surprisingly had a good time too. And it was then that you felt that maybe, just maybe, Jimin and you would become friends.

A/N: Yayyy so we got a little more of Jimin! Next chapter, a small (kind of big) shock comes to this small group of friends. Stay tuned!

(p.s. Jacob is below! Him and Jinsoul would make such a cute couple haha)

PART 3

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petekaos · 5 years ago

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oh, i like ur perspective on ramking! i'll rewatch their parts later to analyze it in another light. king does seem the type do take care of everyone, from his plants to juniors... i guess it's hard to be in the position of someone being taken care of - which can have tons of explanations. besides, seeing how romantic relationships can go wrong, he might not want to risk what he has w his junior. when i think bout this, i believe i might do the same thing lol we, humans, so complex...+

i forgot to mention this before, but i'm SO glad for tharafong! they both seem more mature? i don't mean to say others r childish, but the fact fong was dealing with his mom being sick+helping w their shop and thara is working at a hospital gives me the feeling they carry more burdens and responsibilities. i might be wrong on this, but sometimes i look at them and see two adults who could be on their 30s haha. also, i feel like they only have few moments when they can be themselves... +

now that i know bout s2 i'm so excited to see where they're going. honestly i am surprised in a good way with my engineer. not gonna lie, i wasn't expecting much. but now i think we might actually be watching a tv show deals with adulthood and relationship problems in a serious and mature way. - emo sis (ps: i am doing fine, thanks)

hiii my friend!! yeah, it wasn’t particularly obvious at first but i’m just, like, so in tune with ram and king from discussing them 24/7 and having my own lil headcanons about them that i have that perspective on them dhsnfhd but yeah! he’s just... scared to be loved and scared of risking what they already have by jumping into a romantic relationship when it might be too soon for him. we gotta consider the fact that they’ve known each other... maybe a month? and they have been very vulnerable with one another but they haven’t know each other that long, bottom line. and honestly, i am kind of glad we get some conflict and some time of king stepping away to sort out his feelings instead of just straight up avoiding king. i don’t wanna call it angst because i feel like it’s truly necessary to their growth as characters and the growth of their relationship!

yeah absolutely, i do think thara and frong are amongst the most mature people on the show when it comes to the amount of responsibilites they carry and all the trauma they’ve gone through. it really doesn’t feel like they’re undergrad college students sometimes honestly, it really truly seems like thara is a full blown doctor and frong is doing his masters in business or something. i really can’t wait to see them become even more comfortable with one another, they truly are quality :’) (s2 with ramking and tharafrong as main couples mayhaps..........)

ah i feel you! i wasn’t expecting much from my engineer at all either, at least not in terms of this. i thought there were way too many couples, but they all give them a fair amount of screentime and they all... bring something different to the table. you learn lessons from each one of them and i think it’s important to see the parallels and differences between them. it’s not a perfect show by any means and a lot of the decisions made by the writers frustrate me sometimes but it does offer mature takes and i do think it is quite a decent show for what it is!

#(s2 with ramking and tharafrong as main couples mayhaps..........)#emo sis anon #rahul answers

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chrysalispen · 5 years ago

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xix. all white with wreath and spray

AO3 Link here

splitting into two parts for length, the next part will be up in a day or two

===

Aurelia’s booted feet crunched through the thin layer of powder snow as she adjusted the bundle of fallen wood on her back. Given the conjurers’ tenuous peace brokered with the elementals, the city’s inhabitants were rationing: they were to collect only those things which nature had already shed, and that bounty in itself was limited. Despite the fact it was mid-morning, the Shroud was as still and quiet as an open grave.

Winter had come to the wood, and with it, the hardships borne of poor harvests across all of Eorzea.

The forest’s predators, deprived of their seasonal food sources, soon became a common danger on the roads, and with the Greenwrath so newly quelled the forest was still volatile and hazardous. The city council had done as much to prepare the townspeople and the land itself for the cold months as they were able in the time they had, but their efforts had still fallen short and the outbreak of flux among incoming refugees had strained Gridania’s supplies further. Many people had been forced to winter in unfinished houses or had taken up with friends and neighbors in what space was available.

J’nehda’s ‘storms’ had more trouble yet to presage, so it seemed.

“Are you not cold, Miss Conjurer?”

She glanced over her shoulder. Keveh’to was shivering visibly, his tail wrapped close about one leg when he wasn’t moving, looking quite put out indeed. He had also drawn his shortbow, though either of them had yet to see any game worth the marking.

“Hm? No, I’m well, thank you.” She wore a fleece-lined doublet, leather breeches, a pair of old cotton gloves, and knee-high doeskin boots beneath one of Miounne’s traveling cloaks - along with, of course, the ubiquitous oversized head covering intended to conceal her third eye. Overall, it was far lighter attire than the heavy parkas and thick boots most Gridanians had donned. “Do you want to borrow my cloak?”

He squinted at her as though she’d asked him to wear one of her dresses. “I’m fine too,” he said, somewhat defiantly. “Just… not used to the snow, is all. We rarely get it this far south.”

“I suppose that makes sense.”

“Garlemald is very cold, I hear.”

“Yes, it is.” She bent forward with a soft grunt and dropped her bundle to the ground in favor of the medium-sized branch she’d sighted half-buried under snowfall and dead leaves. “We measure snowfall in fulms, rather than ilms. And it stays on the ground a good long while.”

“How long is ‘a good long while’?”

“Mmm... I should say usually around six, mayhap seven months- er, moons out of the year? ‘Tis longer on occasion, should the season prove particularly brutal.”

“Seven moons of winter?” Keveh’to echoed, horrified. “Seven moons of snow and ice--”

“Aye. And barely any light. And gales that could tear the skin off a gigas.”

“How do you survive it up there?”

“We almost didn’t.”

“By the gods, no wonder you lot want to spread out over the whole bloody star. I’d be keen on beachfront property myself if I lived in the depths of the fourth hell.”

Aurelia began to laugh. “You’re not wrong.”

The Miqo’te’s consternation gave way to widened eyes and an embarrassed flush when he realized what he’d said.

“Er. I- that... wasn’t the most, er... tactful... way I could have phrased that, I suppose. Sorry.”

She raised one booted foot and kicked the side of the branch. The blow dislodged a wet clump of white powder, shaking it onto the leaves below like confectioners’ sugar onto toast.

“You’ve no need to apologize. The capitol is bloody awful. If I had my say I would much prefer Ala Mhigo. It’s hot as blazes in the summer, but at least you don’t run the risk of instant frostbite.”

“What is Ala Mhigo like? I hear the refugees talk about it sometimes when they think other folk aren’t in earshot. Curious. Like they don’t want none of us overhearing.” He fidgeted, hopping from one foot to the other, and she couldn’t tell if he was uncomfortable or simply trying to ward off the chill. “...You don’t have to talk about it either, you know, if you’d rather not.”

“In truth, I’ve naught of interest to share.” Aurelia shrugged. “There is precious little I could tell that you wouldn’t hear from the refugees and you’d learn more of their native land from them than you would from someone like me. Ala Mhigo was my childhood home but I’m the first to admit I saw very little outside my father’s villa, and that was by design, I'm certain.”

“Mm,” Keveh’to said, absently. “Mayhap you’re right.”

A not-insignificant part of her hoped he was simply attempting to make conversation. She was reluctant to face the censure she was sure she would see in his eyes did he chance to speak to the refugees as she had suggested, but what else was there to say? Most of her memories of Gyr Abania were very personal and very limited.

“...We should be getting back.”

“Do you need me to carry that?” he asked.

“I can do it.”

“But-”

She cast him a brittle smile before lifting the branch and tossing it in the bundle with the others, then rearranged the hempen wrap so that the weight was equally distributed and none of the larger pieces would fall before folding the corners, grasping the fabric, and hoisting her burden back over one shoulder.

They trudged back towards the city, the only sound to be heard the crunch of dead leaves and powder beneath their feet, before Keveh’to finally said, “Forgive me, Aurelia. I didn’t mean to pry.”

“I know you didn’t,” she said. “I am sorry. Perhaps I do feel a bit nostalgic.”

“For this?”

“Of course not, but... “ She adjusted the weight she carried on her back and paused. “...there are things I miss. Small things, you know. Luxuries that one takes for granted.”

“Such as?”

“My garden, for one.”

“Your... “ He trailed off, but she saw the light go on behind his eyes when she glanced back in his direction.

The laugh she granted him was a light and silvery thing, spilling across the snow like a sunbeam. “You heard correctly. I had a garden back in Garlemald."

Aurelia would have said 'home,' did the utterance of that word not stick so securely in her craw. Garlemald was many things, but a home had never been one of them.

"A proper garden, then? Like with roses and such?"

"Yes. It belonged to my aunt, really. But she would much rather look at the flowers than grow them herself. I feel a similar sort of… I don’t know. Peace? Serenity? As close as one can get to those things when I’m about the woods gathering.”

“...all right, now I get it. I thought it was passing strange you would be as interested in botany as you are."

"Mhm."

"But if you had a- ...but wait, how’d you have a bleeding garden ‘n all, if the weather’s like this all the blasted time?”

Aurelia shrugged as if the answer was obvious. “Magitek.”

“I don’t follow.”

“There was a greenhouse on my uncle’s grounds. It had heat lamps set to cycle every eight bells, and an environmental control system that- …ah,” she stammered, seeing his blank and uncomprehending stare, “never mind.”

Keveh’to did not respond. Aurelia could feel his confused gaze still boring into her back as they continued up the hill onto the path.

She flushed, thinking that of course her attempt at explanation would have made little sense to him. Most parts of the star had no access to magitek so it was still a rare and fantastic novelty without the Empire’s borders, and Eorzea’s smallfolk most certainly would not have access to such wonders.

Even in Garlemald a self-sustaining greenhouse to preserve perennials was very much a luxury, one afforded only to the wealthy: usually, albeit not always, peers of the imperial aristocracy. But she had loved her aunt Marcella’s greenhouse. Its unique heating system had originated as a student project, one of many annual exhibition entries at the Magitek Academy. Quite often, winning projects were put to practical use whether by the government or by the creators themselves, and in this instance the student's work had been noticed by her uncle. He had gladly improved upon his prototype for the commission.

Her uncle Janus had bragged that the unit was one of a kind because the young man had elected to join the imperial army upon completing his studies, no doubt to build weapons for the legions afield. ‘Twas hardly an uncommon story, he had said with a shrug. There was more profit - and personal glory - in innovating warmachina for imperial conquest than in customizing heating systems for a rich man’s rose gardens.

Aurelia could not take comfort in his explanation, saddened as she was. That a man capable of creating daily wonders for the purpose of preserving living things would be able to turn his obviously brilliant mind towards such callous and violent ends - it defied her understanding.

As was the case with most of her recollections of her years spent in the capitol, even the relatively pleasant memory of her aunt's flowers was bittersweet.

“I… I think I’m a bit chilled after all,” Aurelia lied. She plucked the hood of the cloak from her back and draped it over her head until the top half of her face was all but concealed from view. Frost spilled forth from her lips in a white cloud. “Let’s hurry along. I’ve a mind for some tea.”

She swallowed back the harsh lump she could feel forming in her throat, unwilling to grant it any further leave for expression.

~*~

Miounne was waiting at the staff entrance upon their arrival: wiping her hands in the fabric of her apron, eyes fixed upon the pair. Aurelia shrugged the heavy bundle from her shoulders as if it were feather-light and raised a gloved hand in greeting.

“Welcome back, you two. A decent haul this morning?”

“Decent enough.” She lifted the first branch from the top of the pile and dragged it to the stump they had been using to roughly cut the scavenged tree falls for firewood. “I know we’re a bit late returning, but the Sergeant thought he saw something fit for the stewpot. We’ll have this set up for you in just a-”

“Ah… one moment, if you please,” Miounne said, and Aurelia’s outstretched hand froze in the act of reaching for the wood-axe. “I’ll get one of the lads inside to cut the wood.”

“Not that I’m complaining,” Keveh’to frowned, dusting a thin layer of snow from his lapels, “but is there some reason why we can’t just go on and do it ourselves?”

“Your presence has been requested. Or rather, Aurelia’s presence has been requested. E-Sumi-Yan asked that I send you along to the Fane as soon as I could.”

...The guildmaster?

Cautiously she studied the woman’s face. She didn’t trust unexpected summons of any sort, never had- but, she realized, Miounne was smiling. Whatever it was, it couldn’t be that unpleasant. “Did he happen to elaborate?”

“No, but I don’t doubt he will explain himself in full when you arrive.”

All… right then. She glanced at Keveh’to.

“I assume he’s allowed to come along.”

“Of course.”

Few souls had braved the outdoors this morning- owing largely, Aurelia suspected, to the snow. This part of Eorzea was quite temperate, more so even than Mor Dhona, and snow was a rare enough occurrence that people tended to take to their hearths upon the slightest dusting of white upon the stones.

In truth ‘twas less the weather she found refreshing than the empty streets. In the wake of the increasing food shortage the people of Gridania - already rather inclined towards isolationist behavior - spared few quests and even less coin for Miounne’s adventurers while treating refugees and prisoners of war with barely concealed contempt.

But tension aside, the city was as quiet as the forest. No one accosted or addressed them as they made their way down the snow-lined paths. The only sounds were birds and the soft rhythm of their breathing, and the quiet crunch of their footsteps upon ice and loose gravel.

Even the Fane seemed all but deserted. The sight of the tree filled her with the same dread it always did - but there was a measure of relief as well, for Brother E-Sumi-Yan stood before the entrance holding a neatly wrapped paper parcel in his youthful hands.

“Good morning, Aurelia. Mother Miounne told me she had sent the two of you on your way,” he said, beaming at her. “Come, let’s sit and take tea here by the brazier. ‘Tis a most bracing morning, is it not? I'm afraid all I have in my larder at the moment is chamomile tea, but I was preparing to break my fast. Both of you are welcome to join me if you haven’t already partaken.”

There was chamomile tea with mint, and spiced frumenty, and even- to Keveh’to’s undisguised delight- venison sausages. E-Sumi-Yan speared three onto each plate alongside a small slice of tomato and three coarse-cut pieces of wheaten apiece.

“Twelve,” the Miqo’te said, his voice trembling, “that’s real bleedin’ honey, too.”

She felt her mouth water as she stared at the plating. It was as much food in one sitting as either of them had had all week, and she suspected the guildmaster had been well aware of it.

“Where did you...” Aurelia began.

“From my own cold pantry, never fear. I rarely have guests and eat very little on my own, but seeing as this is a special occasion I can hardly be stingy.” He gestured to the unadorned smooth stones about the brazier. “Please. Sit. Eat. I have a matter I must needs discuss, and by its nature, it concerns you both.”

Gratefully she began to dig into the meal, with Keveh’to doing the same at her side. She ate neatly and carefully, trying to make it last. After so long with only a small cupful of oats a day, the Guildmaster’s spread was like unto the feasts at her aunt’s dinner parties.

Her minder - possessed of no such sensibilities - wolfed down the sausages practically whole, his tail slapping cheerfully against the ground.

“What did you wish to discuss, E-Sumi-Yan?” she asked, curling her fingers around the warm teacup after a long and contented sip.

The fresh-faced Padjal - who ate as carefully as she did, his attention to social etiquette equally conscientious - likewise balanced his cup upon his knee. “Your basic lessons have progressed with remarkable speed,” he began. “In truth, you have taken more quickly to mastery of your own aether than many who have spent the entirety of their lives beneath the Twelveswood’s boughs.”

Aurelia flushed despite herself. How long had it been since she’d heard genuine praise from anyone that hadn’t seemed perfunctory, or given under duress?

“I... thank you,” she said, unable to meet his calm grey eyes, and hastily took another sip of her tea. “It has been no simple task, as you know. I am sure I have much still and more to learn.”

“I quite agree. But I think it is time you continued your studies- in the field. I’ve a mind to send you to the Arbor. There are outlying settlements there in need of our aid.”

“Truly? I had not thought that any of the current Hearers would be willing to, er...”

His answering smile was serene. “Take you on as an apprentice conjurer?”

“....Well, now you mention it, yes, precisely so. I realize the rank and file would have no idea, but the Hearers must surely know the truth. I can't imagine any of them would take kindly to a Garlean woman as an apprentice.”

“You are, unfortunately, correct in assuming that few would be willing. However, the individual overseeing the region where I would send you has little choice but to accept you.”

Keveh’to scoffed. “That bad?”

“Bad?” E-Sumi-Yan laughed. “You misunderstand, Sergeant. No, this is simply a matter of life events necessitating a change. His apprentice is due to be wed in the next two moons and he is aging out of the field himself, and at present I have no other novitiates better suited for the position. I would have you assist him with the villagers’ needs as well as those of the forest. He will require aid whether he is desirous of your help or not.”

Aurelia grimaced.

“I need hardly say this does little to inspire one’s confidence.”

“I do not doubt you will face difficulties initially. That said, I think you will ingratiate yourself to them in due time. Our people are insular and often slow to trust outsiders to the Twelveswood, that much I will allow. But they are not so foolish as to ignore a helping hand indefinitely. No matter the form it takes.”

With a sigh she set the cup back in its saucer and placed it in the empty place sitting on her left. It made a soft, chiming rattle against the stone.

“You are asking me,” she said, “to subject myself to their likely censure.”

“Yes,” E-Sumi-Yan replied. He didn’t bat an eye, nor appear the least bit sorry for it. “I think it will not be as dire as you fear. Truly, this might even be a valuable lesson for all concerned. Yourself included. And you will have Sergeant Epocan there if-”

This time it was Keveh’to’s turn to flinch.

“No offense, Guildmaster,” he said. “Due respect and all that, but... you know full well how most of your folk feel about Keepers.”

“It will be made clear to the Hearer that you are there on an official assignment,” he said, in a tone that brooked no argument. The Miqo’te’s shoulders hunched defensively, but he didn’t retort. “At any rate, preparations are being made. The Elder Seedseer has given her authorization and asks that you accompany Aurelia to her new position. If the powers that be feel she is not a flight risk, I see no reason to delay the process.”

The woman in question had turned her gaze to the snow-covered clearing, watching two small sparrows clean themselves in the powder with a flurry of their little brown feathers.

“Well,” the Garlean said at length, once she realized all eyes were upon her. “Suffice to say: I have precious little if any say in this affair, being a captive audience in every meaningful sense. So, I will keep any further observations to myself. Should you believe my current skillsets might be put to better use elsewhere, then that is sufficient and I will abide by your judgment -- and that of the Elder Seedseer’s as well, I suppose.”

His small brow wrinkled at her reply, noncommittal as she knew it was.

“Aurelia, this isn’t the army. You do have some say in whence you go.”

“Again, whether or not I might mislike the assignment does not factor into such matters. You have my compliance regardless.”

“Be that as it may-”

“Guildmaster, your thoughtfulness in asking for my input is appreciated, but you and I both know it is unnecessary.” Her slim shoulders lifted and dropped, as if the outcome made no difference to her either way. “I shall await orders.”

“I will send word along when all is made ready,” E-Sumi-Yan said at length.

He did not speak his reservations aloud. That he sounded none too pleased warranted no comment.

#reborn by fire #chapter 19 #aurelia laskaris #garlean warrior of light

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nighttimepixels · 6 years ago

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You're doing amazing my dude! I was looking back through your art tag today and I'm just.... blown away by how /gorgeous/ your animating style is. Skeleton Sisters and the Architect is also??? Absolutely fantastic to read????? I'm so gay for each and every one of the ladies. Since Alpha hasn't gotten much love yet(and because I have a huge soft spot for that smart sassy spitfire) might we get some headcanons on how she'd act on a date with an s/o? Or mayhaps gifts she'd give?

jaksjdflks thank you so, so much Anon, you’re so sweet?? (⁄ ⁄@⁄ ▽ ⁄@⁄ ⁄) I try my best on all of it, to keep developing and putting out better content, so... it means a lot to hear that ;v;

And heckin’ bless you for being interested in Alpha content-!! She doesn’t get as much love as some of the others so I’m beyond stoked to hear someone’s interested in her (ง •̀ ヮ•́)ง✧

I’ll put the answer below the cut to save dashes ♡

Okay, the answer to this totally depends on the ‘which date and when does this occur’, but I’ll go ahead and say this is a more lighthearted first date; Alpha, smooth and sassy operator that she is, has managed to score a date, and potential s/o knows that she’s genuinely interested to some degree (so this isn’t a ‘oh we’re just hanging out!’ misunderstanding situation, heh).

Also, disclaimer - I wouldn’t do this for most of the girls (as obviously the fic will involve their dates, so I don’t want to just spoil what’s to come!), but Alpha’s circumstances are a bit different for spoiler reasons, so this one’s the exception ;Dc

At this point, Alpha has developed her fully-detailed and full-sized robot body - she spends more time with friends in the physical realm after all (unlike her male counterpart, Q, who has a whole digital world/people/friends that he is based in/lives with). So she’s taking s/o out on a proper real-world date - no reality bending shenanigans (yet- you can bet she’s started working on VR that can digitize you and interact that way). Here’s how that might go:

Starts by arriving just five minutes early to pick you up; while she’s a casual person and would likely run a little late on average more than early, she’s not only intent on making a good impression, but also sneakily hoping to surprise you just a little early so she can see your fluster and get to banter with you while you finish getting ready.

She’s dressed well - robot body and all, a mix of casual but clearly dressed up too, obvious effort put in without looking try hard. Excellent fashion taste, frankly. Also, whatever cologne/perfume she’s wearing is subtle but freaking absurdly attractive. You literally have to stop yourself from leaning in to smell it.

From there she’s escorting you to her car - one she designed and built herself, wholly electric and renewable, and has the coolest design and vibe without being ostentatious.

Secretly, she totally made a playlist specific for this date, but won’t mention it - it plays in the background, both suited to your shared tastes and appropriate for energy level throughout the date whenever you’re in the car ;Dc

First up is some activity you have interest in, or would well suit your interests even if it’s a new thing; I won’t specifically say what as it’d depend person to person, but it could range from anything like: special show at the aquarium where you get to interact with the animals, blacklight minigolf, a two-person escape room, one of those delightful interactive science museums that’s an adult playground basically, or even something like a pottery class where you get to work together and drink wine or etc etc ;D

The first activity key is something fun, but something you can be close to one another with, involved in the activity, but still have conversation (thus she’s not picking a concert/movie/comedy show/etc for this first one).

Next up, once you’re delighted and possibly just worn out enough to have worked up an appetite, she drives you to dinner ;)c the sun’s setting, she’s picked a place that’s right up your personal alley, and has a great view. A lot of time is spent here, lingering well after the food’s done, having coffee/tea/another drink, so on, and just having great convo.

She walks you then, not back to her car, but to this little hole in the wall bakery - picks up an order, but doesn’t show it to you. Winks and takes your hand, escorting you onwards. Makes some jokes about the mystery of it but doesn’t answer any questions-

From there, she makes a couple other curious stops, doesn’t show you what she’s pickin gup; but the route you take is really picturesque, and easy walk through a lovely part of town that’s meant to be walked through, especially at night as the lanterns shift the atmosphere and so on.

At last you get back to the car, the playlist transitioning slightly, better setting a intimate but not too crossing-the-line mood; probably has a mild jazzy vibe.

You head a little out of town until she pulls out onto a back road, unlocks a barrier, and continues down the road - if you try and get answers she just grins and winks at you-

Finally, she pulls to a stop - but the windows go black (high tech car and all) before you can see. She gets out first, telling you to close your eyes before she opens your door for you - keep em closed - and she takes your hand at last once she opens the door and you’ve complied, heh. She then sweeps you off your feet, startling you- but laughs and tells you to keep em closed-

She walks for a bit, and finally you’re set back on your feet - a few seconds pass and you’re allowed to open your eyes-!

You’re on a picturesque lookout, an old abandoned observatory behind you - no telescope anymore, but the dome still remaining. Alpha recently purchased the land, and wanted to show you most of all-

She gestures in the direction opposite the building, and you can see for ages, on just the other side of the mountains from the glow of the city - the starry night sky stretching above you for ages, as unimpeded as you’ve ever seen it. The things she picked up are revealed, including dessert, a chilled artisan version of your favorite drink, a specially bound book that appears to be of constellations and their meanings (and, if you’re into astrology, she’s also had it hand tailored to include information on the history and rise thereof in relation to the stars - if not, then it’s just focused on a layman’s view and potential interest in them.)

You spend the rest of the date with her, eating the dessert (your favorite), enjoying the specially selected drink and flipping through the pages of the book, and Alpha continues making jokes with you as she points out constellations and talks more with you on all kinds of topic, the atmosphere growing closer all the while~

And, Alpha being the slick lady she is... well, she’s already been friends with you for a while at this point; don’t be surprised if you wind up thoroughly kissed under the stars, her jacket over your shoulders, and a soft playlist that set the mood just perfectly playing in the background. ♡♡♡

#night answers #lilytale asks #lilytale alpha #this smooth ass operator #she knows what she's about #also she's not the type to date unless you've already established a good friendship with her so you've definitely got a rapport going at th #she knows how to lay on the charm ;Dc #definitely lots of room for tailoring as she'd make sure your activities/tastes were well suited #Anonymous

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breselin · 6 years ago

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:) Talk about Sephiroth's wing? We know about the power absorbing etc, but I'd love to hear about things like; when would he show it & to whom? Is he sensitive about people reacting to it? Or is he like 'whatever' & would only use it for battle related means? When did he learn to fly & does he enjoy it? Is the wing soft & could anyone with his permission touch it & if so, would he feel that? So many questions but I'm curious!

OOC: Ah, yes. One of my favourite topics.

Wings for Sephiroth, with very obvious backgrounds [ alone his theme-song of ‘One Winged Angel’ should give it away ], are very important for his character. Not only does he have the single black wing he is mainly known for, but also, throughout his other forms, carries multiple wings at once. The notably largest amount to be found in his ‘Safer Sephiroth’ form where he has six wings, and the seventh one in place of his arm.

The single black wing specifically refers to the ‘a fallen angel’; making it quite fitting for his person and his whole backstory.

THAT AS AN INTRODUCTION, as for the wing itself?

For a first to be noted: It is highly unlikely that people know that he has a wing and can use it as per his own wants and needs. If they have not seen him in battle, or have/had access to secured and closed off data of the ShinRa faculties [ many that are destroyed now as well, also by his own hand ], it is very implausible that someone is even aware of an organ like this for him.

That being said: He doesn’t show it to many people, as there is no need for it in itself, mostly we see the wing in battle after all. The people who did demonstrate otherwise were actually Angeal Hewley and Genesis Rhapsodos, with the latter even talking to Zack about it and how he believes the wing is the sign of a monster, with Zack disagreeing and proclaiming it to be the wing of an Angel [ didn’t help, but Zack tried ]. Sephiroth on the other side, for all the moments we saw him use the wing, has literally no negative thought about it. It is what it is for him, a part of his body he can use, as it apparently makes him a lot faster from his already unnatural speed. If people were to react negatively towards it? Let them, it’s just a ‘whatever’ like you said. If they stare or ask questions, he might answer depending on how his mood is in that very second and you can be lucky.

He also does not use it abundantly, does not show it often; it is mainly a battle-related ‘item’, as he apparently learned to fly even before that, albeit sources call it differently here and there. From the main-game: when his body was immersed in the lifestream, he ‘gained the ability to fly/float even without his wing’. Even with knowing that, we see him multiple times in Crisis Core flying or willing the air to his liking and needing no wing for such whatsoever, it is one of the skills he has as a 1st Class Soldier. Also, this specific show was done by Square Enix, the Final Fantasy XR [ it is basically virtual reality ] showing him literally standing mid-air without the need for his wing, still debatable as it is set after his time in the lifestream, but I still wanted to show it.

If someone were to request seeing it? Say after they had been in a fight-situation, but on his side, with him and would like to make sure it was a ‘real thing’, then he would usually ask them what for and if they can’t trust their own senses. It really depends on how ’close’ someone is to him to be able to have him show it outside of battle or in a more ’leisurely’ surrounding or in fact just have him indulge people.

If you are his partner and would like to see it, he wouldn’t deny it. Interestingly enough, he wouldn’t bring it up either, seeing it as more or less useless to be aware of so his partner’s knowledge would be accidental as well. Nevertheless, specific people in his life are important so he would question the why, but probably figure it was mere curiosity about him and - yeah - mayhap about how the feathers feel and how the wing itself feels. If it’s soft, warm or yet painful for him to the touch? Also it literally emerges from his back in a very brutal and quick motion. It’s not a slow procedure, takes barely seconds and breaks easily through any sort of clothing in the process of doing so. One would wonder if it’s painful for him [ spoiler: nope ] and would likely just be curious. Like said, if it’s his partner or a VERY close friend and comrade requesting it, he would find that humorous but oblige [ likely also mildly complain about destroyed clothing or turn it into a tease that he needs to take off his shirt, ngl, he’s that much of an ass ].

If it’s a person he’s not close to in that way - and it’s easy to figure out with him if a person is - then he would deny it. It’s not for them to behold, it doesn’t have to interest them, but those people also likely wouldn’t ask. It would be a surety for a bad end.

The wing itself! - indeed has parts that are very soft. The feathers are very fine, albeit surprisingly large. The picture above is an image of a teaser we have from how he [ possibly ] looks for the remake, and that is literally the only picture we have from him for that whole release. It’s easily visible how large the singular feathers are, yet how delicately crafted. Most softness of feathers comes from the downy barbs and afterfeathers, as well as from the outer edge of the vane, so it’s easy to say they are very light and tender in his case, especially looking at the upper wing coverts. He wouldn’t let anybody touch his wing, it applies the same as for even showing it in the first place, so yes, permission is required or he’s gonna tear off that arm that tried to touch him. He doesn’t actually feel much in it, aside from the parts that are literally called a ‘wing’s wrist’ where nerves and veins run through and tendons would bend the wing. The feathers also apparently loosen like normal bird’s feathers, so it’s easy to find them around when he was there and used his powers. If they are picked up then or not doesn’t matter for him in the slightest.

There’s a very select amount of people he would allow that close to himself. As of right now, I can list possible candidates and those that are surefire.

People he would allow to come close and even let them request certain things are his partners - Cecil @furnezh; Mateus @daemonczar and Mannimarco @lichsent. And that’s pretty much the most obvious pick. As for others, there are literally only two people who would be allowed to touch them right now, that being Y’shtola @culturedconjurer due to our plotting and talks, as well as Zack @atlaslain due to the relationship they have. Everybody else is pretty much not permitted.

As for people who saw them/might see them? Literally, the cast that is in Dissidia has seen them at some point, given that he summons his wing there more often than not for pretty much obvious reasons of speed-equality and the means to overcome them. He would still only let two people touch them löl. There are a select few of the cast of Kingdom Hearts, given that he appeared there as well with his wing. RP-wise? Jane @uccisore would be allowed to in specific times, same for Lust @hariolor. Thranduil @edhelaran actually might see it, same as Legolas @edhelgund - given their circumstances and that a lot of their meetings are around wars and conflicts. That’s literally all that comes to my mind spontaneously.

TL.DR: He only summons his wing when it is absolutely needed, in case of doubt always consider: Is your muse fast enough to keep up with him or are there enemies around quicker than him? No? Won’t see the wing.

#★ [ headcanon ]#★ [ asks ]#★ [ body headcanon ]#[ thank you ♡~ ]#[ this got long but was fun 8 > ]#[ i should really work on one of these things every day or the likes to get them down ]

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fae-fucker · 6 years ago

Text

Review: The Murder Complex

by Lindsay Cummings

An action-packed, blood-soaked, futuristic debut thriller set in a world where the murder rate is higher than the birthrate. For fans of Moira Young’s Dust Lands series, La Femme Nikita, and the movie Hanna.

Meadow Woodson, a fifteen-year-old girl who has been trained by her father to fight, to kill, and to survive in any situation, lives with her family on a houseboat in Florida. The state is controlled by The Murder Complex, an organization that tracks the population with precision.

The plot starts to thicken when Meadow meets Zephyr James, who is—although he doesn’t know it—one of the MC’s programmed assassins. Is their meeting a coincidence? Destiny? Or part of a terrifying strategy? And will Zephyr keep Meadow from discovering the haunting truth about her family?

Action-packed, blood-soaked, and chilling, this is a dark and compelling debut novel by Lindsay Cummings.

There’s a video on YouTube where Sasha Alsberg and Lindsay Cummings try to promote Zenith and their favorite books by speculating about what sort of books Andi would enjoy reading.

Lindsay, being the humble creature that she is, says that Andi would enjoy this book. Why? Because Andi would recognize Meadow’s methods as similar to her own? Because Andi would enjoy reading an edgy “thriller” because she too is edgy? Or even because both Andi and Meadow are beautiful waifish white girls with silver hair who don’t particularly mind killing people?

Actually, no, you absolute fool. Sasha speculates on why Andi would enjoy this book (because of the title and how both Meadow and Andi have … uh … something … in common) and tries and fails to give Lindsay a way out. Lindsay admits to not listening, occupied with her book, which she lovingly strokes while staring into the camera.

I think this says a lot about Lindsay herself, Andi’s personality (or rather, lack thereof), and most importantly, the content of this here book.

This review contains spoilers and discussions of potentially triggering topics.

The Writing

I don’t have much to say here. Zenith was far, far worse when you just compare the prose. It’s simple, bare-bones, and straight to the point. Perfectly mediocre and not memorable at all. It flows well enough, and if it weren’t for uuuh everything else in this book, I’d say it’s a quick and easy read.

It does get very melodramatic and edgy at times, but that is to be expected, and since the melodrama mostly avoids getting too purple or lasting too long, I will officially give Cummings the “I could read your book mostly without cringing at the words” award.

The story is told from Meadow and Zephyr’s POVs, and I’d have to disagree with other reviewers who said that their narration was too similar. I mean, it wasn’t spectacular and they definitely had some overlap in expressions, but I could tell that Cummings was making a conscious effort to make them distinct and for me, it worked (mostly past the first half of the book where both of them just mope around and sound very similar), so I commend that.

The Characters

Now, while Andi OH SHIT FUCK I DIDN’T MEAN TO DO THAT THAT WASN’T A BIT I LITERALLY JUST TYPED ANDI INSTEAD OF MEADOW

Now, while Meadow and Zephyr are distinct, that doesn’t really mean they’re good characters, yea? Honestly, they’re pretty much the only ones who get any type of development and the only ones who can, paradoxically, turn off their edge and just be normal people every now and then.

Meadow is supposedly this Strong Femail Charactor who does Bad Things for Good Reasons. And … I mean, yeah? Like, I don’t remember ever feeling like she obsessed over a man, and her motivations were always either keeping her little sister safe or surviving or figuring out the mystery around their society and how it ties into her own family. As far as YA heroines go, Meadow isn’t terrible. But she’s not exactly interesting, either. She’s always collected and rarely loses her cool, she displays few emotions outside of anger, and is generally cold and downplayed to the point of having barely any personality traits. I guess it’s sort of on purpose? But there are ways of making a character subtle and still interesting, and Meadow just feels like somebody packaged a Strong Femail Charactor right out of the factory without slapping some paint on her first. Idk, I guess if this is what Lindsay was going for then she did a good job, but personally I prefer my protags to be a bit more … more.

I will apologize to Meadow for calling her Andi, though. Andi is a lot more smug and obnoxious and has fewer reasons to be.

Zephyr is a harder to define because I’m pretty sure he’s intended to be more colorful than Meadow, but he comes off as even more generic than her. He’s a convincing enough teenage boy at times, because he lusts after Meadow like a puppy and thinks in super dramatic and poetic prose about how perfect and beautiful she is. But outside of that, he just sort of exists and the plot happens to him? He has no consistent personality traits and no flaws that he has control over. He’s partially brainwashed to murder on command and he’s like, sad about it, for a second, but accepts it pretty quickly and swears to help Meadow out for … reasons? Idk I guess he’s in love with her or whatever. The blurb implies he wants to keep her from discovering the truth but he pretty much helps her from the start.

He’s perfectly non-threatening — a boy next door type if next door was a war zone. Most of the time I wonder how many hands he needs to count all his braincells. One? Or mayhaps two? Whatever happens he just sort of rolls with after a chapter or two of angst and he ends up feeling like he’s a crutch for Meadow, a non-character there to fill the role of the snarky sidekick whose personal conflict is a minor subplot, which is admittedly fairly unusual in YA, but for a co-protagonist isn’t ideal, as one might imagine.

Koi is Meadow’s overprotective older brother who wants to beat up Zephyr for reasons and refuses to chill. And yes, that’s his name.

Periwinkle/Peri is Meadow’s younger sister and Meadow’s Moality Pet. And yes, that’s her name.

Meadow’s dad is an abusive asshole dad who is Too Hard On His Children but whose lessons Turn Out To Be Helpful in the end. No, it’s not his name but I can’t remember what it is and can’t be assed to look it up because he’s just Meadow’s dad. Oh and he likes torture? While Meadow acknowledges her dad is fucked up he’s still treated as this wise authority figure who gives good advice and is only a result of his environment. Society is evil, so that’s why he treats his children like shit and teaches them how to murder good. It’s to protect them, see?

Talan is Zephyr’s best friend and teenage sex worker who lost her child and now is vaguely suicidal but it’s supposed to be charming and quirky??? Talan is the only major character to die brutally for shock value and she seems to welcome it. Tbh she was the only interesting character in the whole book so I actually felt bad when she was killed off like that.

And then there’s a bunch of other characters but what’s the point of me telling you about them since they’re all generic as hell and only exist to spout exposition at Meadow and her boy toy.

There was another character I liked well enough, but only because she was the only PoC and her name was Sketch, which is a pretty neat name, but she didn’t have much of a personality except “snarky hardass” and was basically a Deluxe Edition of an existing “snarky hardass” character. She appears only in the late chapters of the book and is there to get brutalized for the sake of our two white protags. She didn’t die though, so there’s that?

The Plot

Alright, alright, I guess I have to write something.

I honestly have no fucking idea what the plot was. The blurb pretty much tells it all: Meadow meets Zephyr, they fall in love (?), Zephyr goes all Terminator on her ass and she’s like ??? and then uh … turns out Meadow’s family/dead mom are involved in the Murder Complex, which is the thing that’s making Zephyr and other random people kill others when remotely “activated” and so now they gotta find out what the heckity heck is going on, I guess?

It’s a clear enough plot but the motivations are a little weak, especially on Zephyr’s side. One would think he’d like to get rid of the whole “murder on command” thing in his brain but he seems to be able to fight it off easily once he meets Meadow and he’s more focused on helping her for reasons.

Yeah, I’m … I’ve already forgotten large chunks of the story so that should tell you something.

The “Worldbuilding”

O SHIT HERE COMES THE JUICY PART OF THE REVIEW.

*clears throat* Here we go:

The Shallows, Night Siren, the Initiative, Catalogue Number, Commandments of the Shallows, Creds, the Perimeter, the Silent Hour, Before, Rations Department, Pirates, the Dark Time, the Pulse, the Pin, the Red train, the Blue train, Wards, the Leeches, the Graveyard, the Survivors, Rations Hall, Initiative Headquarters, Wards of the State, the Gravers, NoteScreen, Evaluator, the Catalogue Dome, the Pit, Cred Orb, the Furnace Room, the Library, Sellout, the Hospital, the Believers …

Holy shit I don’t think I’ve gotten all of the Important Names yet and I’m already tired.

Y’all. This is the worst case of worldbuilding laziness I’ve seen in a while, and I’m someone who absolutely hates worldbuilding and will let authors get away with minimal effort. This? This is awful. And the thing is? I get it. I might’ve forgiven this because coming up with names is HARD and we humans usually go for the obvious anyway so this makes some amount of sense.

The problem is the fact that there are some words and concepts that are PERFECTLY REGULAR (i.e. the Hospital is literally just a fucking hospital) but still capitalized for no goddamn reason other than it being an attempt at sounding all sci-fi and dystopian without any actual effort. Everything blends together and the concepts are so generic and so MANY that it just becomes noise and you’re forced to simply roll with it and stop trying to actually imagine what anything looks like or where it’s located or how it works.

*takes deeep breath*

Speaking of how it works, let me tell you about the main premise. Basically, there was a war, a big war that tore the US apart like Lisa tears apart Johnny. Those who survived the war were infected with a plague, creatively named the Plague, that threatened to wipe out the population. One 20-year-old scientist cured the Plague, along with literally everything else, including death. Thanks to “nanites”, humans can no longer die of natural causes. This leads to overpopulation, and to stop this, the person who invented this all-cure comes up with another absolutely brilliant idea: let’s make MORE humans, but these humans have brains that are programmed to kill on command. Who gets murdered is chosen at random each and every night in a lottery, and survivors have to clean up dozens of new corpses every morning. (Meadow mentions the death rate is now 300 people per month.)

Yeah. I know. The same brilliant scientist who CURED DEATH not only fails to reverse the effects of their own invention, but decides that factory printing brainwashed humans who are then released into the world to also consume resources along with their victims is the best course of action?

Also, there are old people in this book. How are they still aging? How do you cure death but keep the aging? Why do you kill random people for shits and giggles instead of offing the semi-sentient sacks of flesh that the old people are bound to become as their bodies grow and decline but refuse to die? Surely you need young people to work in your factories? If resources are scarce, why keep old people alive past the point where they can contribute to society? If you have the technology to make remote controlled brains, why can’t you yank those bad boys out and just put them into robot bodies?

Why did nobody consider sterilization? I know this is a dangerous and sensitive topic that a white author probably shouldn’t touch with a ten-foot pole, but if you’re ok with writing indiscriminate murder and pretend that shit wouldn’t become very racist very fast, then you could do the same with sterilization. You can’t tell me that the nanites are so good they could grow you a new uterus. Evidently they’re not good enough to heal bullet wounds or stab wounds or else your little “murder complex” wouldn’t fucking work, would it?

I’m not saying these are “better” options than murder lottery, because these are all terrible things, but I am saying that they’re definitely more logical and profitable if you’re an evil government. Compared to making new people from scratch to kill your already existing people, anyway.

There are also implications of this all being a lie to control the population so that the “Initiative” can remain in control, along with the usual shitty YA dystopia thing where it’s implied that Earth is fucked and we’re out of resources.

This whole thing is a mess of half-assed concepts that are never explored but just sort of jammed together into an incoherent mess. There’s a big war, there’s a big plague, there’s senseless murder, there’s an evil government, there’s child soldiers, there’s brainwashing, there’s a rebel Resistance, there’s climate change … There’s even an Aptitude Test or whatever that never comes back despite being very angsted and exposited about in the opening chapters. It’s like Lindsay read all the YA dystopias that came before and couldn’t pick a gimmick and just went for all of them.

Oh I haven’t even mentioned the funniest part of all this: the swearing. As with Zenith, Lindsay has no problem describing gory murder and calling female characters “sluts”, but actual human curse words like shit and fuck? Don’t be silly. This is CHILD AND PUBLISHER FRIENDLY. Shit is now “skitz”, “fuck” is now “flux”. Can you imagine reading this fluxing bullskitz? WE NEVER EVEN FIND OUT WHAT THESE WORDS MEAN OR WHY THEY WERE REPLACED, SINCE THIS TAKES PLACE RECENT ENOUGH THAT MEADOW REMEMBERS GOING TO BASEBALL GAMES.

Oh and there’s also ChumHead, which, you guessed it, is never explained.

I guess now we know who to blame for “fike” and “starshined”. Oh and there are swears related to the stars in this book as well. I think Lindsay needs to get off that SJM juice.

The Edgy

Allow me to feed quotes into your gaping brain mouths. Not a lot of them because most of my notes are just me going WHAT at the concepts and the names more than the phrasing.

Every night, I stay awake for as long as I can to keep my nightmares at bay.

Scars are trophies in the Shallows. They show we know how to cheat death.

In a paragraph before this one, Meadow mentions that nanites heal everything but leave scars behind for reasons, and it happens to everyone. So why would they be a status symbol?

It’s the moon. The moon that reminds me of the moonlit girl.

My moonlit girl. She’s the cure to my nightmares, the one thing that helps me feel safe when I can’t even trust my own dreams to harbor me.

Spoken like a real teenage boy, Zeph. Would you like some tissues with that spunk?

I hold the door open for [Talan], but she shrugs past me and opens the other one. Always independent. Never taking help from anyone.

Hi is this a Feminism?

I find two leather thigh sheathes and strap them to my legs. I slide two knives into them and stand, slinging the bow over my shoulder. […] Feeling angry. But feeling strong.

Convenient sexy makeover includes leather knife pockets and a cool but completely-impractical-due-to-the-existence-of-enemy-guns crossbow. I also want to mention that the book calls crossbow ammo “arrows”, when they’re usually referred to as bolts, but go off.

The Conclusion

The Murder Complex is a book that straddles the line between mediocre and bad. Its biggest flaw is how boring and shallow its ideas and characters are. Which basically means its biggest flaw is everything about it. I can’t say it was so bad it’s good, but I can’t exactly call it terrible because I’ve read far, far worse. It’s mediocre writing about bland characters angsting and murdering their way through a convoluted plot that’s based on worldbuilding as solid as half-eaten ham standwich found in a rainy alleyway. It’s not fun or entertaining to read and there’s nothing to get outrageously mad about.

In the end, I don’t think you should pick this up unless you’ve somehow read every other book in the world and this is the only one left. Don’t waste your time on this, not even as a joke. Don’t make my sacrifice be in vain.

#book review #repost #the murder complex #i'm pretty sure i'm the only person who's ever read this book

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