#i mean logically speaking becoming a teacher when you don't like kids is just the most nonsensical choice a person could make

[indi-glo-archive]

why would mr. farouk become a teacher if he doesn't like kids

[blueskittlesart]

i get that people’s first reaction for the religious thing is often negative—being raised irish catholic i experience the same knee-jerk reaction—but that’s because we as adults are approaching the ideology from an adult perspective. we have our own associations with both religion as a concept in general, as well as the social phenomena around religion (and for this post specifically we’re talking about christianity more than anything else). kids don’t have that experience, and so while it might feel really uncomfortable to an adult listening to them speak with such a casual incorporation of it into their worldview, they truly wouldn’t see why that could be. and it’s only when it they’re older and it becomes the only point of perspective or logic for them that it’s truly a problem

EXACTLY. if you don't have a lot of experience with very young children it may be hard to conceptualize, but especially preschool-aged children are still learning LITERALLY EVERYTHING. like, I said the word "collision" when two of my kids ran into each other the other day and then had to have a like 10 minute conversation about what that word means and why I said it. Everything in the world is a new experience for them, including morality, storytelling, and social interaction. there's a specific, scientifically documented developmental stage (usually between ages 2.5-3) where they learn for the first time that they can lie. before that stage, they genuinely don't understand the concept that something can be fake, and it often takes even longer for them to understand that other people, especially adults, can lie to THEM, too. everything in their world is true unless proven otherwise, which can be a scary way for adults to hear religious concepts addressed, since among adults that kind of rhetoric very often goes hand in hand with radical beliefs or conspiracy thought. but for a child, it's just an age-appropriate way to conceptualize religion.

children of that age are also very self-centered in their thinking and largely assume that their lived experience is the same as everyone else's, and that anything outside their own little world doesn't exist. we almost all assumed as kids that our teachers lived at school. I once had a kid with lesbian parents ask me where my 'other mom' was. children I babysit for will very often be upset that I don't inherently know where things are in their house, because to them it's the most obvious thing in the world. they're still developing empathy and the ability to think from someone else's perspective doesn't exist yet. again, irt religion, when that kind of sentiment is expressed by an adult it's usually a supremacist or evangelical who believes that all other religions are inherently evil and their religion is inherently good, but that's not what it means when a kid expresses self-centered thought about their religion. it just means that they haven't yet learned that other people view the world differently.

[bibibbon]

UA teachers suck and UA sucks as a school

UA literally just sucks. Honestly this school has failed so many people especially izuku in particular.

Maybe it wouldn't of actually earned this title if we got more academia arcs but from the canon stuff we have so far it sucks!

No bullying policy?

So you see a student outright bullying another student and you decide to do nothing?!?!?! The student then doesn't even get any concequences for his actions?!!!!?!?!

Exposing students to the whole world after a villain attack?

So right after usj you have the sports festival and you don't even decide to delay it because UA's security measures have to look like their on top and apparently that's the logic behind it. Also, reminder that the UA sports festival is MORE POPULAR THAN THE OLYMPICS. So watching 15-18 year olds use their quirks to harm eachother is alright???! Like aren't you basically using minors for other people's entertainment?!?!

I mean realistically speaking you could of tried to delay the festival or just make the first years not do it that year. Just have them do tournaments with only heros present so you actually protect students safety and don't have people and villains watching/witnessing their weakness

Lying to the public about students being psychologically fine?

We never saw the phycological evaluation that the students did after the training camp incident and saying all students were psychologically fine was such A big lie considering you had a GROUP of students go and try and rescue another student because they couldn't trust the teachers enough to handle the situation which idk about you but that says A LOT.

Chaining up bakugo?

Look I hate bakugo I really really do but muzzling a whole student and making him a whole public disgrace has to be illegal? ...Right. like if bakugo wasn't going to cooperate then just disqualify him and make todoroki the winner and save yourself from attracting villains to kidnapping the kid.

Acknowledging that your entrance exams are badly done but then not changing them?

Seriously, we get aizawa talking and talking about how useless and illogical the entrance exams are but then nedzu does nothing... ABSOLUTELY NOTHING ABOUT IT. aizawa had a point about the exams favouring people with offensive quirks but can he really talk about that when all he does to teach his class is just play sick and twisted logical ruses on them? Also shouldn't the exams focus on different aspects of heroism instead of defeating villains?

Aizawa and his teachings being accepted?

I don't know about you but aizawa being a teacher is wild to me. Like this is the guy who actively does NOTHING to help his students but trains a student that's not even in his OWN CLASS!! He then goes on to not even read his students files which contain some very important information that could explain some or majority of his students behaviours that he isn't bothered to understand!!!! Also the amount of expulsions he has even if they are on paper they are literally a death sentence to students as it permanently destroys their records and ruins their chances in finding any normal job let alone becoming heros. He also only points out the problems with his students and then does nothing to help LITERALLY NOTHING!!

Is therapy a thing in UA?

No like this is actually a serious question because if you're telling me that hound dog is a therapist then I might as well leave because how is he a therapist when he offers nothing and is cannonically seen as threatening by all the students?!?!? Also were 1A or 1B even offered therapy after what they went through?!?! Like some of 1A literally showed some clear trauma responses and UA does nothing about it. Oh and this isn't even mentioning what hound dog done to izuku ( izuku is a gag and so is his pain) oh and what about mirio did he get any support after nighteyes death

Midnight in the anime?

We all have our own problems with midnight but her in the anime is totally different then the midnight in the manga. In the anime she continually flirts with students and you get it she does stuff she isn't supposed to. In the manga its a bit different but there are some scenes like the final exam arc where it's a bit weird

[tr1ppykay]

I hope you know that there’s always a place that you’ll be welcome, even if you’re thrown away from other places due to your identity.

You’re a bi genderfluid man, and anyone that tries to change that (other than you) or take the piss out of your identity can try to parry the crowd of bees I just guided towards them

hi thanks, this means a lot. logically i do know that there are queer spaces welcoming to me, its just that *finding* them is a complicated issue. i tend to socially isolate because of trauma- growing up, my ADHD symptoms were mocked by both my peers AND authority figures in my life- i was severely bullied by other kids for being weird, and my parents/teachers regularly treated me as an annoyance/burden/mistake. I default to assuming that everyone always wants me to leave because of this. so when i try to meet other queer people like me irl, and the handful of assholes decide to tell me I should leave because "women" who like men or "women" who decide to become men aren't welcome, it reinforces those thoughts and sours the whole experience. its equally a me-problem and a problem of how people like me are perceived in queer spaces. if had no trauma, I would be able to shrug the assholes off. but then again, if there were no exclusionary assholes, people with similar trauma to mine would be more welcome- and i don't think queer people should have to fully heal from trauma to feel safe in their own community.

my experiences with ableism, antimasculism, and SGA-superiority all come together to create the perfect cocktail that leads to most queer spaces excluding me. I think my anecdotes speak to this specific intersection between my identities as a neurodivergent bisexual transmasc.

[arcplaysgames]

GUYS I FINALLY GOT DOJIMA TO MOMENTARILY PULL HIS HEAD OUT OF HIS ASS. I ain't pickin' no namby-pamby soft options with you, Dojima, if you need to be bullied into doing the right thing, so be it.

After he reads a whole book to Nanako, he reveals the phone call at dinner was about his wife's murder and its more dead ends. Like. God, it's fucking rough. But at least I feel like Dojima is moving to a more truthful place, where he can admit he is looking into this for his own sake and not really Nanako's.

That said, he is still not remotely the Hierophant and its annoying me tbh. Whateverrrrr not all of the Arcana assignments can be perfect.

Oh hey its student council girl that you only really get to know in Boy Route. Sup. Wow, she was a first year in P3P and now she's a senior, so it REALLY hasn't been that long since P3P. That's wild.

Lmao she reveals that she got her speech written by Mitsuru. Of course she did.

kanji no

also EDOGAWA!!!!!!! EDOGAWA!!!! Out of all the teachers, he was my favorite by far. Weird fucking occultist nurse dude.

RAISES EYEBROWS

I kind of already know the broad strokes of this story, but it's interesting that my starting persona is Izanagi and the game is giving me an unskippable primer on the topic. Izanagi and Izanami were the parental gods of Japan. Izanami died during the creation of fire and wound up in the underworld Yomi. Izanagi went to get her but set his comb alight (a bamboo comb, huh) to get a look at Izanami and saw she was all gross and dead, he fled and put a boulder over the entrance of Yomi. Izanami (imo rightfully pissed) told him she would kill 1000 people a day. Izanagi said he would create 1500 a day.

gee i WONDER if this will be RELEVANT LATER.

The hotel they got booked at is.... moderately sketchy.

i'm making faces rn. See, this kind of shit wouldn't have flown at Gekkoukan.

RAUCOUS APPLAUSE

My heart beats for this dumbass. I think in a previous scene, Yosuke accused Teddie of speaking in commercial lines and YOU KNOW. YOU KNOW. He really does. He goes through life like he's just living in a charmed sideways version of life. lmao what if Teddie's whole thing was that he was the personification of that commercial glintz. Like, he literally can do the sparkle-shine thing on command and can charisma-check anyone into doing what he wants. It's a fun theory and frankly more than I have right now.

If Teddie is just "what happens when the commercial becomes aware of real people and loved them" I will be tickled. I mean, "I did a lot of sit ups so now I have a human body" really is some TV magic logic.

lmao is the "eh we don't give a shit if underaged kids come here" club!

lmao kanji has a bad crush on naoto. aw, buddy. we can wingman you if you want, bruh.

coughs

i wouldn't know shit about that lmao

rise you have no idea how close you came to getting absolutely fucking got that night, trust me. that boss fucking sucks XD

oh my god they are completely toasted

oh yeah this seems totally safe for teenagers to play without adult supervision and, in fact, many miles away from the guardians. yep.

i love just the idea of someone suggesting this to the SEES dorm and how it would be shut down fucking immediately, first by Mitsuru, then Yukari, then Akihiko. Hell, if Shinjiro or Akihiko just walked by right now they would rat out these kids immediately and shoo them home. It truly is a completely different group here lmao.

Shout out to Naoto fucking silently observing all this shit. Hilarious.

I'M GONNA NEED A PART TWO, FUCKING IMAGE LIMIT. BRB.

[thejustmaiden]

Jaken = Rin's Dad?

Okay, is this how a daughter treats their so-called father?

Most definitely not.

Rin and Jaken's relationship clearly screams of your typical sibling rivalry punctuated with cute and silly moments of playful bickering.

Yes, Jaken may technically be her main provider, but that doesn't necessarily equate to him being more of a father than Sesshomaru. If anything, he demonstrates more of a brotherly love towards her. As we all know, parents (which Sesshomaru embodies more based on real life patterns and parallels) will leave their older more capable children in charge of looking after their younger brothers and sisters. In this case, that would mean making Jaken responsible for watching over Rin and protecting her if need be. Ah-Un offers protection, too. Think of it as Jaken as the big brother and Ah-Un as the family dog who are babysitting while Sesshomaru as the parent of the household is away at work or taking care of business. I mean, they literally fit that description to a tee and I'm dying at the accuracy of it all! 🤣👌

[Quick! Someone write up a modern au where Sesshomaru finally gets out to have a nice date night but everything goes wrong in the most spectacular way. Like maybe Rin and Jaken catch a ride on Ah-Un to go spy!]

I recently revisited some episodes from The Final Act, and I couldn't believe how many moments like this there were where Rin got after Jaken or when she would "put him in his place" so to speak. Obviously, all of it is mostly harmless. I was only surprised by how often it occurred, not to mention how Jaken would just stand there and take it. Towards a supposed father figure, Rin's behavior is downright unacceptable. There's a certain level of respect a child is expected to show their parents/guardians, and that's just not what I'm witnessing here between them. Like at all.

Rather their dynamic has the nature of some sibling relationships like I mentioned above. So I really wish fans would stop pretending otherwise, because based on what we know of father-daughter relationships- healthy ones at least- they don't appear anything like what Jaken and Rin have. If you could please provide me other examples of where we've seen similar portrayals in fiction or in real life, then perhaps I can get on board.

Look, that doesn't have to mean that because Jaken isn't her father then Sesshomaru must be. They can both be her caretakers without necessarily filling that traditional father role. I'm just saying that if we're going to start assigning titles to characters, let's make sure we are accurate and truthful in our assessments. If you're going to label anyone Rin's dad, then it needs to be Sesshomaru. Jaken doesn't have precedence over him in terms of fatherly attributes, that just wouldn't make sense.

After all, this isn't about what you want to see, this is about what Rin very likely sees. It's safe to assume that she views Sesshomaru more like a father than she does Jaken. She knows she's safe with him (broadly speaking lol) and that he'll come for her no matter what. That sense of security and comfort is what a child seeks and what they should always feel in a parent's presence. She trusts and even idolizes him, just as a young and innocent child tends to do with their parents. At that age, parents are perfect and could do no wrong in their child's eyes. Idk about you, but this describes perfectly how Rin is around Sesshomaru.

Rin adores him and will follow him anywhere- yes, even into danger! That's what the innocence and unconditional love of a child will bring them to do if necessary. Fortunately, at the end of The Final Act we learn Sesshomaru takes Kaede's advice when he realizes that leaving Rin with her in the village is in her best interests. That way she'd be able to lead a more normal and safer life alongside other humans. Remember, Sessrin shippers, that doesn't mean he wasn't still a part of her life and didn't witness her become a young woman over the years right before his very eyes. Therefore, if they eventually do become romantically involved, then most if not all of those gifts had intimate and seductive intentions and it essentially constitutes as child grooming.

I understand from a Sessrin shipper's point of view why it'd be so much easier to claim Jaken as the father. In doing so, they diminish Sesshomaru's role in her upbringing. By refusing to acknowledge the real role he had in helping raise Rin (short periods can be crucial and impressionable too esp. in a child's early years so yes they did assist in raising her not only Kaede), these shippers are better able to justify how their filial-like relationship evolved into a romantic one. So yeah, I get it, if I were a Sessrin shipper I'd probably do the same. It's one of the more plausible arguments available to them, after all. "Let's pin Jaken as the father to fend off antis!" is the best chance they've got, but even so, it's still not good enough. But if you insist Jaken is indeed like a father to Rin, then Sesshomaru is most certainly one too. Who says she can't have two fathers anyway?

The thing is however much you want to deny or downplay what Sesshomaru truly means to Rin and vice versa, nothing will ever change or hide the truth of the matter. Please, stop acting like they're only traveling companions and nothing more. Some of y'all even go so far as to say that they're like strangers. Knowing potentially little about a person is not equal to a lack of love and affection. Making big assumptions such as this to defend your ship is actually doing you more harm than good. Let me elaborate.

According to your reasoning, if that's all Rin ever was to him was a companion and Sesshomaru had no real attachment to her, then what precisely is the basis of your ship? Recall that Adult!Rin doesn't exist yet, thus we have no real idea what she will be like or if she's even alive. So how can you make comments like that but then go on later to say "they have such a unique and unbreakable bond" or "only Rin can be the mother because she's the only human he ever cared for" if all that time spent traveling together didn't amount to much in the first place like you claimed to believe beforehand? Do you see how your rationalizing is confusing?

Contrary to what some of you may think, I'm not just saying all this because I'm an anti and I'm obligated to disagree with you, or whatever other excuse you want to tell yourself. Believe it or not, I'm attempting to give as unbiased and objective of an analysis I can based on widely accepted interpretations of family dynamics, development, and any history we know of.

Of course I respect that at times fans will perceive things differently since that's bound to happen. What's hard for me to wrap my head around however is the unwillingness of some fans- not exclusively Sessrin shippers- to apply basic common sense and sound judgment to their observations and deductions.

Looking at all our facts, then taking the small handful of scenes Sesshomaru and Rin do share together into account, one can logically conclude that their dynamic is akin to one found in a typical parent-child relationship. If you still fail to recognize Sesshomaru as a parent to Rin, then that's fine too. In the end, that won't really change the fact that he'd still take on a role resembling an adult figure overseeing a young child's care and protection. Be it as a vassal, guardian, what have you. Plus, nobody is saying here that Sesshomaru doesn't make mistakes regarding Rin's general well-being, but so do all parents. Overall, I think the majority of us agree that Rin is in good hands. Whether it's in his direct company or in his occasional supervision from his frequent visits to the village.

In other words, it doesn't really matter what exact title you assign him in relation to Rin, as the distribution of power is all inherently the same with any and all adult-child relationships. That bond never changes once you've established it either, seeing as it's a special kind of connection one can only form with a child and a child alone.

I was a teacher for a few years, and speaking from personal experience, you don't need to be a parent, per se, to take on a role of authority in a child's life. I know without a doubt that I could never and will never view any of those kids I taught in a sexual/romantic light later down the road; yes, not even once they become grown-ups who are independent and more than capable of making their own decisions. Those of you who disagree are usually missing the whole point though, because we're not trying to dictate what Adult!Rin can and cannot do like many tend to accuse of us doing. This isn't a question of taking away from her autonomy nor does it fall under "purity culture," which is why people shouldn't continue jumping to these outrageous conclusions and really listen for a change. You're deflecting from the real issue here when you choose to misinterpret what we're saying by ignoring the problem we're actually referring to. You cannot present a valid counter-argument if you persist in twisting our words.

Bottom line: once these kids become old enough to pursue a sexual/romantic relationship, of course they have that right if they're ready. All we're trying to say is you guys ought to stop pushing forward this it's-completely-normal-to-want-to-bang-your-adoptive-dad-since-you're-an-adult-and-can-do-as-you-please agenda and not expect backlash. Ship it if you want, but please stop acting like their romance would be the epitome of a pure and healthy relationship.

Sesshomaru may not wear his heart on his sleeve, but it's foolish to presume he didn't actually care about Rin during their whole time together just because he didn't openly express his feelings until the very end. Surely everybody can comprehend that people handle and process their emotions differently. The way Sesshomaru chooses to is completely valid for the most part, so let's cut him some slack regarding this already.

What I'm trying to get at is that any child whose life you played an influential role in will always be a kid in a lot ways to you even when they're old and wrinkly. Just as they will always picture you as the loved one who guided and protected them when they were most vulnerable and couldn't always fend for themselves. Can't we relate this to children we know personally and apply it accordingly?

Finally, I want to end on this note. Could you kindly take a look at these two images below for a second?

The reason I ask is because of something I recently read that's relevant to the topic. There was this pro-sessrin tweet I saw that stated Rin trying to take care of Sesshomaru when they first met is what a mom would do for a child, which in their opinion, translates to Rin being more like a mother than a daughter if anything.

First off: are you freaking kidding me????

Seriously, so now children aren't allowed to tend to their sick or injured parents?! Parents are apparently superhuman and shouldn't be offered a helping hand from a child, even if they mean well and want to help their parent who's in pain?? Now this Twitter user was mostly being a smartass, but at the same time, it was evident they genuinely thought they offered a valid enough point that warranted no further explanation or clarification.

Secondly, by saying this Sessrin fans don't seem to realize that in actuality they're contradicting themselves and proving the point we've been trying to make all along. Glancing at the first picture and moving down to the second, the role of the one being cared for and the caretaker is reversed. So then by their own logic, Sesshomaru IS in fact like a father to Rin.

What it comes down to is the names you give to the roles these characters play aren't as crucial as the dynamic they share. The specific characteristics of that dynamic are what define the importance of said role, not so much the name in the role itself. So real father or not, Sesshomaru and Rin clearly mean a lot to each other. Close relationships are defined and solidified by the devotion and belonging they have to one another, not solely by the duration of time spent together and their proximity.

Well, that's a wrap! I hope you guys got something outta this blog, and that you enjoyed or found some portions of it interesting. I would love to hear your thoughts on the subject from this fandom, but only engage in conversation if you plan to be respectful. Thank you!

[autumn-foxfire]

I've noticed that a serious problem in the fandom is that people refuse to look at an abuser and say that they're suffering while still thinking of them as an abuser. It's easier to either make them worst than they actually are and make them enjoy the suffering of others, or pretend that they aren't doing anything.

But people rarely hurt others just for the sake of it. More often than not, the way we treat others comes from our own pain:

We have Overhaul as an example, who wanted a world free of quirks, felt repulsed because of his own and wanted a world without quirks, and this manifested on him hurting Eri. Endeavor, who was suffering because of jealousy and wanted to be no. 1, and this manifested on him hurting his family. Bakugo, who wanted to be the best, and proceeded to hurt Deku when threathened. And then we have characters like Uraraka, who loves seeing people happy and who doesn't like to impose people, because of her parents. Aizawa, who is very strict as a teacher and it seems to me that it was because of his experience with Oboro. All Might, who decided to become the Symbol of Peace because of the chaos in the past...

The idea is that once you say that x character is an abuser or perpetrator, then you are crazy or people get offended, because it takes the whole suffering away for them. People mostly relate to the victims, and seeing abusers as the ones who get hurt is kind of controversial. If I say that Endeavor was suffering, the amount of people that will probably come after me is going to be terrifying. I don't even have to give my reasons because most aren't going to listen, and therefore my opinion will be useless. So, when you give the public this man, Dabi, who is attractive, charismatic (the video, I guess), related to this person who was an abuser (Endeavor), and then telling his lifestory, it feels anticlimactic to call him an a perpetrator. And then people start saying that you can be both a victim and an abuser, which I understand where do they come from, I mean, you can be a victim and then become a perpetrator, but oh my God, how much I disagree when others say that you can do it at the same time when it comes to these situations from the manga...

Looking at the LOV vs heroes battle and saying that the LOV are the victims, or saying that Dabi is both a victim and a perpetrator at the same time, takes the whole meaning, official meaning of being a victim and a perpetrator in a situation, that are terms that heavily depend of the context in my opinion. There's also people who say it in an abstract tone, and those are the only ones that I can actually understand. But maybe because I've became too logical, guided by the rules when it comes to these types of words that have such a big influence in the real world because the meaning changes depending of the person, that I disagree so much. I know nothing, but I prefer looking at it objectively because that's how I think we should act when it comes to something that could be, potentially, a crime. When thinking like that, I inmediately enter a zone where my first thoughts are "right now, your feelings do not matter", something that could make me look pretty cold, and... I guess that it's naturally hard for people to do that when you are so emotionally invested on someone. Some people are going to assume that I didn't experienced something related, even. And then they start projecting and... ah, it's a disaster. I really think that humans should stop thinking that just because you didn't experienced something, you can't talk about it. Knowledge isn't completely empirical. Like, have you ever heard of being rational--?

If you are the one hurting others or the one who's going to hurt others, then I think that by logic, you are the perpetrator. You include what happens on the outside, and it may change things.

But once you include what's happening inside of you, your reactions and emotions, it changes the whole meaning for others.

I guess that's why things get so simplified on Law--. When you add what makes us humans, it becomes a huge problem.

I think Twice battle is also a huge example of this... You could say that Hawks was the perpetrator, but once you add the reasons of doing it and the context (protecting the civilians), he becomes a victim and Twice is the perpetrator. But people saw the perpetrator suffering and that changes everything, because the general idea is that they don't suffer at all. Twice became more emotional than Hawks, and it translates into him being the victim and Hawks being the perpetrator, regardless of the context. Throw the fact that people sympathized with Twice and it becomes a disaster.

I don't believe that people are bad from birth and it heavily depends of your experiences as a kid. I think that we are all victims of something, and then, some people become abusers. That's just life...

... Maybe I should just write an analysis about it instead xD

Many people do tend to have a black and white view of victim and perpetrator from what I’ve seen in fandom.

As you said, many can’t seem to grasp that abusers much like Overhaul and Endeavor had genuine reasons why they did what they did and it wasn’t based on the need to cause their victims suffering, rather their suffering was an after-effect that they ignored in order to focus on their goals. What many people I think also fail to understand that having a reason for your actions doesn’t excuse what you’ve done and while many seem to grasp this with Endeavor and Overhaul, they don’t seem too when it comes to the League of Villains.

I’m not really sure why this is the case though my guess is because they are victims in the past unlike Endeavor, who’s past is unknown and irrelevant,  or Overhaul, who still had the family support behind him though he may not have had the most conventional of upbringings.

I would say I’m like you, to be honest. While I acknowledge the league and their past, I view it as mostly irrelevent when it comes down to stopping them unless it can be used as a way to speak them down. Knowing their situation certainly makes me understand why they’ve done what they’ve done but it’ll never excuse them in my eyes. I guess I would be considered cold too.

It’s certainly an interesting topic of debate to think about. Many people do act more with their hearts then their heads and that’s neither a good nor a bad thing (it depends on case by case situations), at least what I’ve seen in the fandom, and while I love the empathy most in fandom have, I feel like they sometimes take it way too far for the League. Especially when they don’t show the same empathy for the League’s victims.

...I think I’m just rambling at this point T-T

[mysticalmusicwhispers]

aditya is going to be grounded forever and ever and ever once he gets caught lmao. indus might even throw a slipper at him 😔someone please help him (not yao he's going to make it worse. or maybe yao can give him nice doodles and presents as a way of consoling him. he probably won't feel bad but at leas he will try to make his friend less sad lmao. and iran would help!! even as they're like "wtf you're SUCH A BAD INFLUENCE" @ yao. their combined efforts would likely make aditya very happy!!) the poor baby will not be having any fun for a Very Long Time :(

HM i think nyo china should live in a place of residence that makes me want to eat the rich whenever i walk past it, filthy capitalist that she is. but should that be the penthouse apartment of a high-rise condominium or should it be a lovely landed property? or maybe she has 2 houses an apartment for yao and sometimes herself in the suburbs of their primary school and a rich people house in the city that is near the elite high school she WILL get yao into (but this might mean moving yao away from his friends in middle school 😔) . decisions are hard. but yes she definitely buys her way out of trouble with her neighbours all the time

"you should follow his example in the things he's a model at not in things he does badly" i CHOKED i don't think i've heard a more chinese parent quote than this for the past 3 years they would totally say this and of course their disgruntled kids would complain that yao is um not the most respectful of the law dhwkntke

ALSO HIS POOR TEACHERS... I CAN'T BELIEVE THEY HAVE A CLUB THAT'S SO SAD OH MY GOD

hmm i think that like. even without a mentor's guidance yao will probably become less unruly and wild as he ages, as a process of growing up and becoming less focused on causing Chaos (he's directing that feralness to like. making an actual plan to take over the world probably), because society's tolerance for buckwild bullshit decreases as you get older and older, and the likelihood that he'll miss out on awards and other accolades if he continues this sort of behaviour, which his ambition won't allow for. BUT what i think won't change is the fact that he's an arrogant asshole and he becomes more and more so as he grows up with a lifetime of academic and extracurricular excellence. so im just saying imagine said sub in high school absolutely tearing apart one of his assignments. like just covering the whole thing in red-inked ruthless rebuttals and giving him a c. yao has never gotten a c in his life and is both humiliated and impressed because the sub is RIGHT, and they managed to outlogic him (which up till now only his friends + nyo china could probably yao doesn't associate with dumb people). and then he progresses amazingly in that class during the sub's remaining time with them and gets nyo china to let the sub teach him when they land a job. like i feel as though he would greatly benefit from an older mentor who won't tolerate his bullshit and would challenge him to reach new heights and this might be person!! (this thought is kinda unrefined and doesn't fully explain the Vibes but i need a nap now + it's not really Baby au anymore it's Slightly Less Baby au fhwinfkwg good afternoon to you and good night for me!)

They’re so sweet omg ☺️ Yao and Iran giving Aditya little presents... I love it. Their small gang of bastards has to stick together after all. Also yeah RIP India; at least they still have time to interact at school, but at-home hours is rough. (also, Yao’s neighborhood is moderately far from Aditya’s, but what about Iran? o-o I feel like they’d live a bit closer (?), maybe a couple streets away, and Iran isn’t on Indus’s blacklist yet............ (but then again, Indus probably banned any of his friends coming over lol). Also, Yao makes a plan to somehow get into the house across from Aditya’s and flash morse code at night with flashlights so they can talk, and hopefully it entertains his house arrested friend! Iran is dragged along for the ride and just goes with it lol. Jury is out on whether they get caught.)

Nyo China’s many houses.... :| she would do that oh my god. Also I think (?) there was a whole crackdown a while ago in China on people who were buying houses they didn’t live in, so they could get their kids into good schools in that residential area.... that radiates her vibes and I hate it. Miss China, how does it feel living in a penthouse, or just being rich in general O-o I LAUGHED at “decisions are hard” that’s everything about nyo china. “hmm yes I can’t choose which house I actually want to live in so why not just buy all 5??? yep, sounds like a good idea!” O_________O can’t relate

lol thank you; I was trying to channel Chinese parent energy and I’m glad it came through! The kids are grumbling that Yao could just be 100% awful or 100% academically stellar, but no, he has to be a genius AND a delinquent (just choose one, god) also yes they have a lil club just for them! Only people who have the honor of suffering get to join :)

And to your last paragraph, HELL YES IT’S CANON NOW. “Yao doesn't associate with dumb people” I’m crying omg. Yao takes all honors/gifted classes and doesn’t speak to anyone who doesn’t 😭 The big red C glaring at him from the top of his (once beautiful) essay stabs him viscerally in the chest and he needs to take a few days before looking at it again in order to recover his strength ego. He reads through all the comments and each one shreds his ego even more lmao; they’re not even mean comments but he just knows the sub is Completely Correct and sinks into a low like he’s never had. But yesss @ the whole episode pushing him to do better in order to keep up his Academic Excellence, and maybe impress the sub whom he now views as superior and whom he actually has respect for.

May I propose the sub is miss Vietnam o-o... she probably should be in the gang of ancients (as the only other kid who can rival Yao in Logic and fistfights, but isn’t friends with him like the other ancients because he sucks and she doesn’t like his bs) but shhhhh.... we can make a spin-off AU and nobody needs to know... lol anyways, I feel like if the substitute is Vietnam, she and Yao would have some sort of antagonism (not too tense but not friendly bickering either) at the beginning; Yao really wants to impress her and do better in class but Vietnam just. Does not like how he’s an asshole, especially to other people he thinks are below him sksksk. But they slowly warm up to each other especially as Yao gets ~reformed~ ever so slightly, and then it turns into friendly bickering and Long Debates on various intriguing topics (Yao always plays devils advocate in those :|). But yeah I definitely think she’d be a good candidate ig, since she doesn’t take bs even from the star pupil who is also an ass. And she’s a sub at first, so it gives her a little bit more room to throw hands whenever she wants instead of having to control herself lol

[inkshro0m]

Logan's Secret Emotion - A Platonic LAMP Oneshot

cba to get rid of the big gaps so.... sorry bout that😅

--------

Logan found it very hard to express his emotions. He kept them all to himself in his big brain, the one that's stuffed with knowledge and facts. Or that's what Virgil, Roman and Patton thought...

Patton felt as though Logan found him annoying. The nerd seemed to ignore him or he just had an annoyed expression etched out on his face. Patton always tried to make him feel loved and cared for, and only wanted to express his friendship! Maybe he shouldn't be so bubbly and friendly all the time...?

Roman felt as if he was too... him for Logan. Said man usually rolled his eyes whenever the prince-like man would sing his sentences out, enthusically commenting on the weather, or something like that. Honestly, Roman could be who he is. If who he is is a man who is so extra he could become chewing gum (extra?? the chewing gum???...yeh, that metaphor was wEiRd- hi, future kat here.... pls ignore this =_=) and is just... loud, then too bad for Logan, he wasn't changing.

Virgil felt like Logan just hated him. He was probably too edgy and too emo. The smart guy probably thought he was too anxious for his own well-being and needed to stop, and maybe he just found him too annoying because he was in his way. Then again, Virgil thought that everyone feels that way about him.

One Wednesday morning, Logan received a notification, which is quite rare for him. He usually only got notifications from the news or something.

He was currently solving questions in his favourite problem solving book, 'The Ultimate Trivial Pursuit', smothered in his favourite unicorn onesie, with a coffee sitting out in front of him, slowly cooling down. He rested the book on the table and picked up his phone, opening it up to display one of his best friend- Patton -'s name, along with some tumblr notifications which he just swiped away. He read the text with slightly intrigued eyes following the words displayed before him.

Hey Lo! Sorry to bother

you, but I was just wondering

whether you would like to

join me, Ro, and Virge at

Sanders' Cafe at 12pm?

You don't have to of course,

just wondering! xx

Hmm... did he want to go? Who was he kidding, of course he wanted to go! He loved his friends with all his heart! And yes, he had a heart.

Salutations, Patton. You are

not bothering me. I would

appreciate the oppertunity,

thank you.

What Logan didn't know was that that single message caused an excited squeal to errupt from his beloved friend's mouth upon seeing it.

Three beady eyes had been eagerly watching the three dots slowly bouncing up and down, anticipating for a response. They all felt as though they needed to hang out with Logan more, it felt like he was growing apart from them. Leaving the nest.

Logan had started to get ready as soon as he'd replied, leaving his favourite book and coffee to go cold. His friends were more valuable.

Quickly slipping into his black polo and blue jeans and messily tying his tie around his neck, he was stumbling around the room, way more excited to see his friends than an ordinary person would be. He picked up his comb and brushed his bird nest of hair... how it got this tangled, he didn't know the answer to (which is quite rare). Then, he cleaned his teeth for 2 minutes because body maintenance is important.

Meanwhile, the other three were slightly nervous (even though it is just their friend). What if he was bored or didn't actually want to be there. Roman was the least worried; he didn't really care about what Logan was thinking. Patton just wanted Logan to have a fun time, and Virgil was just his anxious self. What if he was just going because he felt he had to?

Logan was already rushing out of the door and almost tripped down the three steps at his porch... oops. That was just enough to remind him that there are probably people watching... so he just carried on being as fast as he could because why should he have to wait any longer? He tugged at the car door, only to remember that he left his car keys on his bedside table when the door refused to open... dammit!

Sprinting back into his two-story house and up the staircase, he snatched up his keys and went back out to lock the front door (which he'd stupidly forgotten to do the first time). He, more orderly than last time, got into the car and started it.

To check that there where no cars coming, he looked out the window to find a little boy sitting on his bike, wide-eyed. Oh... so there was someone watching...

The embarrassed man just gave him a small smile, just to assure the boy that he was fine. Logan was well known for his stoic manner and teacher-like personality in his neighbourhood, so this must have been pretty weird for the boy... oh well. He can't go back now (both of them can't).

The boy's eyes followed Logan as the car rolled down his driveway. This was awkward. Once the man was sure there were no cars coming to stop him from seeing his friends, Logan pulled out onto the road and sped off towards the cafe the 4 friends where supposed to meet at. Wait... what if they were pranking him? What if they weren't going to come at all? No. Patton wouldn't do that. Neither would Virgil. Roman? maybe, but not Patton nor Virgil.

With anxiety in his eyes, Logan stepped out of the vehicle once he'd parked it and walked, normal pace, into the cafe. His glasses-shielded eyes darted around the room, looking for 3 familiar heads... Bingo! Phew, they weren't pranking him. A tiny smile (you could hardly even see it) made it's may onto Logan's face, all anxiety washed away. He was going to see his 3 favourite people! Those people's heads turned his way when he made it to the table they were sitting at.

Patton's eyes widened upon seeing the necktie-wearing man, despite expecting him. "Hey Lo! I'm so happy you came!", he excitedly greeted, genuinely meaning what he said. The bubbly one hasn't seen the other in over 2 weeks, and that's a long time for him!

Still with a smile that was unnoticable, the formal one slipped into the booth beside Virgil and nodded, "Salutations, I appreciate being able to see you too". He looked around, secretly happy to be with these people again.

Virgil was on his phone, but he'd nodded at Logan because he doesn't want to be rude and be hated even more. Also, speaking wasn't his strong point.

Roman waved, "Greetings, pocket watch! How have you been doing? We haven't seen you in so long". There was slight sarcasm in his tone, obviously a little annoyed that Logan didn't spend more time with them but it wasn't really his fault, they'd need to invite him first. 'Pocket watch' ignored the nickname and the tone, he was used to this sort of thing from the flamboyant man. "Adequate, thank you. What about you? Have you all been doing well?", he looked around the table.

The usual answers came: A grunt from the emo, a "Great!" from the bubbly man, and a "Very well" from the actor.

Logan let his lips twitch upwards to show he cares at least a bit.

"Well, shall we order our drinks? Or are we going to just sit here in awkward silence?", Roman suggested, chuckling a bit after the end of that sentence.

Patton stood up, quite quickly may I add, "Oh yeah! I'll pay for it all; my treat!", he giggled. Everyone reluctantly agreed, knowing there was no point arguing as the dad figure would always win.

Three of them stood up, Virgil staying behind because he doesn't like doing things in groups, he'd go after they'd figured out what they wanted. The emo noticed that Logan's phone had fallen out of his pocket as he'd gotten up, so he picked it up and set it on the table for the teacher-like man to pick up once he comes back. The phone's screen lit up upon contact, revealing several notifications from tumblr. Huh... Logan has tumblr? 'Didn't expect that', Virgil thought. Maybe he'll follow him, his posts must be interesting - seeing as he's very intellectual and smart. He checked the username: '@logical-crofters'. 'Man... he's really obsessed with that jam, isn't he?', Virgil snorted. The darkly-dressed man opened up his own phone and quickly followed him, before the others called him over to choose what he wanted.

Slipping his phone into his pocket and leaving Logan's on the seat, he rushed over to the others to pick a hot chocolate. He'll read his posts later.

Once everything was ordered and everyone was sat down, Logan noticed his phone, causing a confused expression to make its way onto his face. Virgil noticed this, "It fell out your pocket", he simply stated. A nod came from Logan, letting him know he understood.

About 5 minutes later, everyones drinks got delivered to their table. Patton sighed, relaxed, as he smelled the lovely scent of his sweet hot chocolate, which had whipped cream and marshmallows mounted on top of it. Mmmmmm...

Roman happily sipped on his iced tea; it was so refreshing!

While Logan drank his black coffee, Virgil quietly tried to start up conversation, which was a rare sight to see. "So... Logan, I didn't know you had tumblr", this caused the addressed man to almost spit his mouthful of coffee all over Patton, but luckily he's not that careless.

He looked over to the man who'd spoken, "You saw that?". The anxiety that had gone away a while ago had come back, making him fear what the other thought.

"Yeah. When I picked up your phone, I saw the notifications. I haven't read any of your posts yet but I've followed you", he stated, letting him know the details.

Logan let out a squeak that sounded like an 'oh'. 'Please don't read them, please don't- What if he reads them? What if he shows the others? What will they think of me?!'

"Hey, is everything okay?" Patton layed his hand on the almost-panicking man's forearm, bringing him out of his over-working mind. Logan's eyes had been dialating, telling the others that something wrong was obviously going on.

Logan's eyes finally went still, focusing onto the man who was currently comforting him. "Yes, yes. I am fine. Just, Virgil-", he looked at the man he'd addressed, "please do not read my posts..."

Virgil wore a look of confusion. 'Why wouldn't he want me to see them?', he queried.

"Why?", Roman, who'd been quiet this whole time, spoke Virgil's thoughts.

What was he supposed to say? Logan didn't want to let them know why, or his secret would be out! "Just...", he sighed, causing the other three to raise their eyebrows, even Patton. The necktie-wearing man was bright pink, wondering whether he should let the others know what he'd been hiding.

Too late. Virgil was already getting his phone out and clicking on '@logical-crofters' on tumblr. The owner of that account hadn't noticed until a small gasp came from beside him, causing everyone else at the table to whip their heads towards the sound. 'Great', Logan gave up. Virgil knew... he'd definietly tell the others.

Virgil's thumb wouldn't stop scrolling. These posts... they were so sweet! Oh my goodness, Logan, you are so adorable!

Some of the posts read:

"My three best friends: Virgil, Roman and Patton, are the best people in the whole galaxy. I'll bet on it. Virgil is so considerate of other people and is an interesting person over all, he is also fascinated by space, as am I. Patton is, though I don't like to admit it, very funny and adorable... in a friend way. He cares about others so much and does his best to make everyone feel alright. Roman is very creative and a great guy to be around. He is so dramatic, but in a fun way. He tries to agrue with me, which is funny because we all know that I'll win, but he tries his best."

"Patton is so loving and it warms my heart :')"

"I had a long talk with Virgil today and I have found out that he is interested in space!"

"Roman was great at performing as 'Evan Hansen' from 'Dear Evan Hansen' today. The musical was so moving."

Patton and Roman had scrambled their way under the table between them and Virgil to look at his phone with wide eyes, excited to know what Logan was holding from them. Their beady eyes watched the emo's thumb slowly scroll through the posts, reading the compliments and sweet messages talking about them so passionately.

Meanwhile, Logan groaned and stuffed his face into his arms, not before taking his glasses off because... we wouldn't want smashed glasses now, would we?

About 3 minutes had gone by and Logan was contemplating whether he should just leave because this was just way too embarrassing. Suddenly, a pair of arms were thrown around him and squeal sounded, way too close to his ear. Ouch. "Oh my gosh, Logan! I didn't know you felt this way about us, I thought you didn't like us or something but this just proves me wrong!", what it sounded like to be Patton practically shouted into the embarrassed one's ear.

"So you did like the performance! I knew it!", Roman exclaimed. Logan could just see the dramatic pose that man was doing.

There was silence from the darkly-dressed man, which caused Logan to slowly lift his head up, put his glasses back on, and look around. His eyes landed on the silent one. Were... were those tears?

"I- no one's ever said anything like that about me. So... nice", he finally spoke, eyes watering from joy and happiness. He looked up at Logan, a smile creeping up onto his lips. "Thank you, Lo"

This definitely wasn't the reaction he was expecting. "Uh- I... I was just speaking my thoughts. You all mean a lot to me... I know it doesn't show but... it's true", Logan was so suprised he could hardly even speaking in an orderly manner!

All three beloved friends shared a look, one that Logan didn't understand. Oh no...

They all looked back at him..."No thank you. Please-" He was cut short because there were 3 pairs of arms squeezing the usually serious one so hard he was sure that his eyes would pop out, and that's pretty hard to do. "Guys, I can't... breathe...", Logan was pleading now.

They all let go after one more squeeze from Patton, allowing Logan to breathe once more. The dad giggled, "You're so amazing, Lo".

To this, Logan adjusted his glasses and regretfully said, "I believe the correct phrase for this is: 'no you'".

Virgil snorted and Roman burst out laughing. Patton just couldn't resist another hug and Logan was fully smiling. This was very unexpected, but he loved it. They all knew how much he loved them. No more awkward conversing. No more secret emotion...

--------

originally written on wattpad

[noblest-roman-of-them-all]

So, here's the thing. I feel like I have a pretty good relationship with my Anxiety. I've taken several Psych classes, I've taken several Bio classes. I understand the mechanics behind Anxiety fairly well.

But the thing is is that when Anxiety really kicks in...it really pulls you down to a very...instinctive line of thinking.

The Biology class I'm taking right now, the exam that I have tomorrow, those things aren't threats to my physical health. Those things...can't actually hurt me. But knowing that doesn't keep my Anxiety from seeing them as a threat.

Which is what sets off things like magnifying and catastophizing. Those things, for me at least, lead to avoidance. As Virgil puts it, "Can't be a bad video if you never make one."

But avoidance also makes it worse because it becomes this loop of fear of studying and failing anyway and fear of not studying and subsequently failing.

I was anxious to the point of nearly throwing up just trying to open my class, and when I thought I'd trying a compromise of folding laundry and listening to a suggested study video, I could literally feel my heart rate spike and my breathing quicken.

Logically speaking, in that higher area of brain function, I know that I'm still learning these things even when Anxiety is making it difficult to focus and I feel like I'm not retaining anything, I know that I am because when I go review later, I recognize things. I'm fully aware that the professor has said as long as we consistently score over 70 on the exams and turn in work that we'll pass. And I've done that thus far and have even done some extra credit work. I know that even if I don't do as well on this test as I want, that I'm going to be okay. I know there are ways I can bring my grade back up.

But the Burnt Out Gifted Kid Syndrome (which is just an extension of Imposter Syndrome if you ask me) in me does not like that idea. And...it's really a hard thing to reconcile with.

I mean, one day your in third grade being told that you have all this potential because you're reading at a college level according to standardized tests, but then nobody does anything to help you nurture that and your left to your own devices (or in my case, I was actually given less work because I was getting too far ahead of my classmates) and suddenly your motivation is gone. You still cling desprately to the image of the Smart Kid, even though...nobody really seems to think that much of it anymore because they're not doing anything with you for it. So...why bother putting in the effort?

Then you get to college and suddenly your family expect that Smart Kid from elementary to come out again, except this time everyone's reading at a college level, and...it turns out maybe you're not that special after all.

But thing of it is...I didn't "lose" or "waste" my potential. I was a child. I was a child that wanted to learn and then was told to stop. I didn't lose my potential, it was taken from me, however inadvertently it may have been, because in all reality, I didn't have the most experienced teachers in the world.

They certainly didn't pick up on the autism.

The thing of it is... is yeah, sure. Maybe I fail this class and it takes me longer to get where I'm going...it's not going to be the end of the world. I will be okay. I am more than the Smart Kid. And...as much as I would like them to, I don't need people to approve of my Creative aspirations.

No matter what happens tomorrow, I'll be okay.

Y'know. I'm fully aware that I'm both magnifying and catastrophizing right know. I know that's what I'm doing right now.

But I can't make it stop.

[omglr]

trollercoaster

You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!

You both like socialism, feminism, and feminist.

You: hi

Stranger: Abortion is the literal definition of the slippery slope. First they say aborting a fetus is okay and them they move onto late term abortions and everyone is accepting it! Soon they’ll say aborting babies is okay and then say that a mother has the right to abort her teenage sons. Soon, they’ll be aborting all adult men because the end goal of feminism is genocide. That’s why I call them feminazis, because they literally advocate for eugenics and the murder of an oppressed group that gets blamed for everything (men)

You: ha

You: hey dude

Stranger: feminazis are cancer

Stranger: hi

Stranger: the war on masculinity is also a slippery slope

You: ha

Stranger: first destroy gender norms and patriarchy

Stranger: then they want to destroy men

You: dang you need some better boots boy

Stranger: feminists are our oppressors

You: like, these ideas aren't getting much traction with me

Stranger: are you a feminazi?

You: maybe you just live in a rainy hilly area

Stranger: shut up bitch

Stranger: im a man

You: yeah dude, it seems like you've got it rough

Stranger: why are feminists so mean?

Stranger: what did i ever do to them?

You: like, those are some wacky problems that aren't really hurting you

Stranger: yeah they are its a slippery slope

Stranger: they’re going to kill all of us

You: sliperry slopes are logical falacies boy

Stranger: no

Stranger: its the truth

Stranger: birth control is a gateway drug to murdering all men

You: dude, the world is collapsing cause of capitalism

You: not ladies

Stranger: lol are you a commie

You: yeah dude

You: and i hate nazis

Stranger: good for you. you should hate feminists

Stranger: they are literally fascists

You: ha

You: na dude, i'm like more into hating actual facists

Stranger: they are fascist, they want to take away our free speech

You: lol

Stranger: and they dont want our men to just be men

Stranger: feminazis are misandrists

You: you must be trollin boy

You: you sound histarical

Stranger: im not a troll

You: well that's just sad then

Stranger: and lol im hysterical?

Stranger: well you’re a woman

Stranger: so you’re even more hysterical

Stranger: are you on your period?

You: lol

You: yeah bro

Stranger: lol!

You: and you're the one raggin' on me

Stranger: you’re a man hater, all feminazis are

You: lol

Stranger: im just defending masculinity

You: its pretty offputing look honestly

You: you ever get head?

Stranger: no because i am a mgtow who doesnt need females in my life!

You: have you considered going your way into oncoming traffic?

Stranger: lol real men commit suicide the right way only girls attention whore like that

You: or joining the navy ?

Stranger: i once shot myself in the head

Stranger: twice

Stranger: didnt even die

You: tyler durden was gay

Stranger: lol @ all the girls who overdose or walk into traffic

Stranger: just looking for attention

Stranger: whos tyler durden?

You: yeah attentions seakers are pathetic

You: you're tyler durden

Stranger: no?

Stranger: im a real man

You: fight me then

Stranger: lol i dont hit women

Stranger: despite me being a mgtow i still care about chivalry

You: i'm not a woman

You: i'm you

Stranger: the f??

You: yeah b

You: i'm just a projection

You: of your inner desires

You: baby fight me

You: fight me

Stranger: no dude thats pretty gay

You: c'mon

You: just suck my tit then

You: c'mon baby

Stranger: wtf i thought you were a dude??

Stranger: are you a trap?

You: no b

You: i'm your mom

Stranger: because sometimes i want a trap to go my own way with

Stranger: just two bros except she looks kinda femme

You: be the trap you want to see in the world

Stranger: but she wont divorce rape me or get pregnant

You: i'll accept you my child

Stranger: no, im a masculine manly alpha as fuck dude!

You: yeah

You: bet you couldn't drink rubbing alcohol

You: you sound like a pussy my child

Stranger: bet you i can

Stranger: i’ll drink a bunch of rubbing alcohol right now

Stranger: prove it to you that im a real man

You: ok baby

You: then you'll fuck me?

Stranger: no, thats gay

You: its not gay i'm you mom

Stranger: you sound like a pussy fag

You: you speak to your mom with those fingers?

Stranger: beta white knight

Stranger: i fucked your mom

You: you finger bang your mom with that mouth?

You: c'mon girl

Stranger: shut up bitch

Stranger: i am not a girl!

You: do you believe in love?

Stranger: love is for incels, im a chad

You: cause i got something to say about it

Stranger: i pump and dump traps everyday

You: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GsVcUzP_O_8

Stranger: whats that

You: its a hot song

You: to fuck too

You: yeah

Stranger: i heard that song before

You: yeah

You: on the radio?

Stranger: idk where

You: when you were a baby?

Stranger: maybe

You: maybe baby

Stranger: i have a fucking awesome manly memory

You: but you were a kid once

Stranger: nah i was a man when i was 6

Stranger: alpha as fuckkk

You: and isn't that where it all started?

You: where did they touch you?

Stranger: i fucked my teacher when i was 11 lol

You: oh boy

Stranger: yeahhh

You: that was rape

Stranger: no

Stranger: she let me

You: yeah, no

You: she raped you

Stranger: lol a woman cant rape a man

You: that's rape of a minor

Stranger: and besides i liked it xd

You: stilll... she should go to jail

Stranger: men always love sex

You: and you should go to therapy

Stranger: lol its every dudes fantasy bro

You: you sound all fucked up my dude

Stranger: dude wtf??

You: yeah man

Stranger: im not fucked up you are

You: i'm not your mom

Stranger: why tf you support feminism?

You: i'm your friend

You: and i think you need helpo

You: like

You: professional help

You: this is serious

Stranger: i think we chatted before

You: oh probably

Stranger: you’re the really gullible guy who believed everything i said

You: oh totally

You: i must be

You: i believe it

You: i am just real gullable

Stranger: yes totally

You: cool

Stranger: so bro

Stranger: wanna have a barbecue

You: yeah boy

Stranger: hang out, do some bro stuff

You: i'll bring a six pack

Stranger: thanks bro

You: and give you the number of a therapist

Stranger: lol dudes dont need therapists

Stranger: we dont talk about our emotions like girls do!

You: we gotta work on your approach with the ladies man

Stranger: naaah im mgtow now

You: like, that was rough

You: dude, if this is your way

You: its not a good way

Stranger: yeah its a good way

You: it's not to late to deescelate

Stranger: independent free of women

Stranger: m g t o w

You: no man, you are a slave to women

You: you've given them all the power

Stranger: lol says the beta cuck on the plantation

Stranger: no bitch i dont give them power

You: man, you have

Stranger: i just ignore them bitches and gold diggers

Stranger: i fuck traps instead haha xd

You: to come off so hostile at every moment of your life

You: to deny yourself love

Stranger:

Stranger: im a fucking dude bro

Stranger: i aint denying myself love

Stranger: love is for pussy beta fags

You: its cause you dont wanna get hurt

Stranger: real men pump and dump

Stranger: redpilled as fuckkk

Stranger: men dont get hurt

Stranger: men dont cry

You: yeah dude

Stranger: we’re fucking amazing

You: i'm glad you are just trolling bro

Stranger: not a troll bro

You: cause this otherwise would be unhealthy

You: no you must be

You: cause otherwise it would be so so so sad

Stranger: but really its so fun to pretend to be a sensitive fragile dude

You: like what a sad creature

Stranger: i know right!

You: like god-damn gollem

You: with no ring

Stranger: i love doing this its like literally they get offended by everything

You: yeah

Stranger: men are really dumb

You: i'm surprised you didnt mention venezula

Stranger: oh righttt

Stranger: well the character im playing isnt a capitalist anyways

You: oh yeah?

You: what is he?

Stranger: feudalist :p

You: ha ha

Stranger: anyways i think im manlier than you and i finished my rubbing alcohol

You: that legit made me laugh

You: ok dude

Stranger: well you think im kidding

You: the feudalist part

Stranger: oh

You: ok, maybe call 911?

Stranger: well i wasnt going to admit to being a fascist after i told you feminazis are the real fascists

You: yeah, i mean, it wouldn't stop a nazi

You: probalby

You: "like, feminists are nazis, but also like... i support the kkk"

You: anyway, you ever listen to riot girl music?

Stranger: no not really

You: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CKAtmRhsF30

You: oh wait

You: this isn't it

You: ....

Stranger: true tho

Stranger: what even??

You: https://krecs.bandcamp.com/track/all-women-are-bitches

You: there we are

You: i don't know what was up with that first one

You: anyway, Fifth Column was pretty cool

Stranger: oh

Stranger: not really my type of music tbh

You: fair enough

You: what kind of music you like?

Stranger: idk honestly

You: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=j3V1SKM0uVo

You: here's a weird scifi mashup album

You: with a robot socialist agenda i think

Stranger: im not a socialist haha

Stranger: or even anti-capitalist at all

You: i mean, its hard not to buy in

You: in for a penny, in for a pound

Stranger: nice try but im not going to become a commie

You: idk, i mean you say that now

You: but someday you might have to renounce your ways

Stranger: im pretty content being a class traitor, thanks tho

You: lol

Stranger: i love licking the boots of female ceos just as much as male ones :)

You: good for you

You: i mean, after the revolution we'll all have boots

You: and we can take turns

Stranger: no thx boots are oppressive

You: no dude they got good grips

You: to prevent slippery slopes

Stranger: literally foot binding and patriarchy in disguise

Stranger: lol

You: oh, i see what your into now

Stranger: boots are just heels under a different name

You: bondage and heals

Stranger: ?

You: they'll have bdsm after the revolution

Stranger: im not into bdsm haha

You: why not?

Stranger: because bdsm is inherently oppressive to women

You: you're so normy

Stranger: reinforces misogynistic stereotypes

Stranger: ikr

Stranger: patriarchy literally

You: women on top

Stranger: no, thats still misogyny

You: matriarchy

Stranger: but honestly

Stranger: men who have that fetish are honestly sooo misogynistic

You: yeah

Stranger: puttig women on a pedestal isnt any better

Stranger: bdsm is misogynistic

You: and like often into cops and normy shit

Stranger: no revolution

Stranger: i love cops

You: ha

Stranger: they protect and serve us 💕

Stranger: buuuutt

Stranger: 50% of cops should be female

You: thats what your sub should be doing

Stranger: sub?

You: your submissive man servant

Stranger: i dont have one

You: never too late

Stranger: thats pretty gay tbh

You: he give good head

You: and does the dishes

You: and he's there by choice

Stranger: lol matriarchy and gynocentricity

Stranger: feminazis r oppressin men

You: in your case its a gaytriarchy

Stranger: im a girl

You: oh yeah?

Stranger: yeah

Stranger: im not like other girls

You: you a swerf?

Stranger: yeah i think sex workers rights are dumb

You: gross

Stranger: they should be sex slaves

You: double gross

Stranger: swerf and terf

You: gross x infinity

Stranger: grossssss

You: so what brought you to these terrible opinions?

Stranger: well i watch fox news

You: no further info required

Stranger: :)

You: you watch the OA?

Stranger: whats that

You: netflix show

Stranger: nope

You: its pretty good

Stranger: ehhh not my type of show

You: there are men in it

Stranger: gross

You: they go there own way

Stranger: that sounds nice actually

You: yeah

Stranger: i wish all men would go their own way

You: wish they would leave faster

Stranger: is it wrong to want all men dead?

You: if you are pulling the trigger probably

You: but if its like an accident

Stranger: no, i mean like i want them to just conveniently disappear

You: yeah

You: that sounds normal

You: but also, don't we all have little secret prayers

You: for a goddess to strike our enemies down

Stranger: its pretty late

Stranger: i should probably get going

You: yeah

You: ok, have a good sleep

Stranger: good night!

You: :)

Stranger has disconnected.

[earthsiders-media-blog]

I Do, I Don't, I Do, I Don't, I Do, I Don't!

It’s 4.30 am and I’m a little frustrated and annoyed. I huff and sigh as I watch my husband walk out of the bedroom. Seconds earlier, I’d felt a twinge of delight as he took the time to ask me about my morning. I was replying enthusiastically, when mid sentence he suddenly disappeared out the door. Why does he always do this?  I can laugh at myself these days as I listen to this question go through my mind. In the past, my thoughts came with far more pain, exasperation and a strong desire to be angry with my husband. Early in our marriage, this pain would also have further negative repercussions for my family. It came with compound interest so to speak. It would become the reason I could justify: Giving my husband the “cold shoulder” or “silent treatment” later in the day. Getting angry at him for the way he was speaking to the children. Getting angry at our children for not listening Slamming a door and walking off down the road Back then, I did not know why I reacted so intensely to my husband’s behaviour. I did not realise my reactions were more about my own subconscious beliefs. I did not know that he was showing me hidden parts of myself.  The parts I avoided and chose not to hear, feel or look at.

Looking back now it doesn’t surprise me at all. Who really wants to feel into their true thoughts? Thoughts like: I am not worthy of being heard I don’t matter I am not important to you Everything else in your life is more important than me It was much easier to keep pretending I was ok and be mad at him.  

It took me a long time to find the courage to face my true thoughts, to own the fact that I was the one causing my own pain.

On my worst days, I believed my husband thought I was an annoying and boring interruption to his day.

It took me about 20 years to fully believe that my husband loved me. It didn’t happen until I started to fully love myself. My road to self-love was originally driven by the idea of being a better wife. With this aim in mind I bought a copy of a book called Passionate Marriage. Reading it changed how I perceive love, forever.

Passionate Marriage, written by Dr Schnarch centred around a concept called differentiation, which means: “Your ability to maintain your sense of self when you are emotionally and/or physically close to others. The endpoint of differentiation is being willing and able to trust yourself in the company of others.”

This concept blew my mind and scared the shit out of me at the same time. Wasn’t it my job to care for everyone around me? Wouldn’t I be a bad mother and wife if I cared for myself? Wouldn’t I lose my friends?

I learned that couples practicing differentiation were extremely honest about their emotions and grew even closer as they matured.  I learned that deeper intimacy and passion was, in fact, possible as one aged.

 For a kid who had grown up hearing jokes about marriage being a sexless prison sentence of life long suffering, this was more than just good news. It was awe inspiring and incredibly reassuring. I knew it would take a lot of courage but my quest to be differentiated had begun. My first stumbling block didn’t take long to arrive. I learned that logically understanding something and doing it were two very different things. At that stage I still found it extremely difficult to ask my husband for his time.

It would bring up fears of being rejected and disappointed. I would need lots more practice (over ten more years) and a few more tools before I could totally be myself in the company of others. My biggest changes occurred when Faster EFT (Emotionally Focussed Transformation) came into my life. I began to really understand what was driving my negative mindset and I was able to change it on a deep cellular level. I could truly make peace with memories from my childhood in which I had felt rejected, not heard, misunderstood, disappointed and betrayed. This deep inner work combined with Dr Schnarch’s concept of differentiation was the perfect recipe for me. Now, not only do I logically understand the concept of differentiation (trusting in myself), I have the mindset to actually implement my desires calmly and peacefully without fear.

It’s now Wednesday 4.30pm, 12 hours since my husband left for work this morning. Soon, he will be home. Thankfully, he is no longer blamed for my negative mindset and inability to process my emotions.   I will greet him with a big hug and kiss. I will tell him how much I appreciate his hard work. I will tell him I love him. Later I will remind him how much I love it when he replies to what I am saying in the moment and gives me his full presence. My relationship with my husband is still my greatest mirror. I appreciate that he can still trigger my old negative behaviours. I am still a work in progress, I am grateful for all the books, teachers and tools that have brought me to a greater understanding of myself. The young woman who walked down the aisle towards her beloved 22 years ago was a brave soul. She barely knew herself. She had no understanding of the wounds she would need to heal or the learning curve she was about to embrace. She was totally unaware of the courage it would take to keep lovingly committing to life with her husband. Today, I love this young woman. My love for my husband continues to deepen everyday. I am so proud of myself and the life we are creating together.