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lifechurchgb · 8 months ago

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Out of Order - Women in Ministry Pastor Shawn Hennessy

Good morning. Welcome. So glad that you guys are here. I want to look at 1 Corinthians chapter 14 today as we do wrap up this series of messages that we've been in on the book of 1 Corinthians getting through what you're going through. And if you want to follow along, you can do that on the Bible app. If you don't have that app, you can scan this QR code up here and it'll take you there, download the app. Of course, if you want a traditional Bible, we've made plans for you too. Literally given away thousands of Bibles over the last decade. And if you want one, we have that as a free gift.

If you'll just stop at the welcome center before you leave, it is our gift to you. If you're watching us online, welcome. Love you guys. So glad that you guys are with us. And love you guys, and so glad that you guys are with us in this beautiful... Summer is finally here. It's beautiful outside. If the weather were like this all the time, then we'd be overcrowded and overtaxed. So enjoy it while you got it.

I love when we do series based on biblical books. I think it lets us help you to dig, to drill down past the pages and into the content, the context, the meaning, the meat of that particular book. And I think a lot of people go too fast when they read scripture. They're in a hurry. It's almost like it's a homework assignment. It's like, "Let me check this off the list." Some people will read a whole book of the Bible in one sitting.

And over 30 years, what I've learned is that I really need to slow down. Sometimes I'll get stuck on one scripture and it'll just be like jerky in my teeth where it's just there and God won't let me move past that because it must mean something. It's beautiful that... Scripture is like a kaleidoscope that depending upon the angle of your life at that particular time, it can say something different to you at that particular time and yet still be the one constant absolute truth that we have in this world.

I know that like I don't know about you, but when I read other kinds of literature... I am a reader. And so there are times when I'm reading a different kind of book and I'll get two or three chapters in and I'll forget who the person in the book is. I'll be in chapter 3 and I'll go, "Wait a minute, who is Jimmy?" And then I'll have to go all the way back to chapter 1 and I have to go, "Oh, I've been thinking for two chapters that Jimmy was Johnny." And so it kind of changed the whole book. So sometimes you just have to slow down. So that's what we're doing in these kinds of series, and I hope that you have learned a lot over the last two months, and I hope that today is no different.

I wonder if you've ever skipped a step. Sometimes instructions can be confusing, can't they? Have you ever tried to build a piece of IKEA furniture? What are these instructions? It's one sheet of paper with pictures but not enough words. And sometimes the guy in the picture is scratching his head like he's confused because sometimes the instructions can be confusing. Sometimes all the instructions can be crushing. When my son, Isaiah was little, he saved up all of his money and he bought the Lego Death Star. And so I tried to help him build it. And the keyword there is tried.

It is 4,016 pieces. The instruction manual is 324 pages, and the Death Star is built in sections. And if you skip a step, you have to take all the pieces off and you have to start that whole section over. Can I just say it is not easy to take two Lego pieces apart. There are dentists who love Lego because how many of us have broken our teeth trying to take two pieces of Lego apart? In fact, they have a special tool for taking Legos apart, but they don't put it in any their sets. You have to go on their website and you have to buy this sold separately.

I wonder if you've ever skipped a step. I want to talk about that today in a message we're calling out of order. Let's pray. God, we love you. I mean, that could be the whole prayer, honestly. We love you. But we love you because you loved us first. God, before we ever loved you, before we were ever committed to you, before we ever started serving you. You loved us, you were committed to us, and you've been serving us our whole lives. And so today, I pray as we submit ourselves to your word for a few moments, that your word would multiply in our hearts and our minds that we'd be changed, that when we leave here, not only would we be enlightened, but that we would be changed. In Jesus' name. Amen.

You ever going to use something and discover that there's a sign that says out of order? I was in a place the other day and they had one of those soda machines that only God could have given us. It is all of the different kinds of soda and then all the different variants of what that soda may be. There's Coke and Diet Coke, and Coke Zero. And if you want a Coke Zero, you can have a Coke Zero orange or a Coke Zero lime or Coke Zero lemon or a Coke Zero grape or a Coke Zero cotton candy. There's like 5,000 different variants of what you could have.

And when I see one of those machines, I get so excited. So I went over to the machine and the only thing that it dispensed was water. I've spent my whole life trying to avoid drinking water. And the lady came out and she put a sign on the machine and it said out of order. I was so disheartened, so discouraged, so distraught. And when you see that sign, it doesn't necessarily mean the entire machine is broken. Clearly that machine was still functioning. It would distribute the one thing that people didn't want.

What that sign might mean is that there's just one piece, a switch or a hose that needs to be repaired or that needs to be replaced. But if you just replace or repair that one thing, everything starts working again. Paul is talking about that here in relation to the church. The idea that one piece being broken can make the whole thing out of order. Listen to this. He says, "What then shall we say, brothers?" When you come together, everyone has a psalm or a teaching, a revelation, a tongue or interpretation. All of these must be done to build up the church.

If anyone speaks in tongues, have it be two, three at the most and they need to speak in turn and someone has to interpret. But if there's no interpreter, the person speaking tongues should remain silent in the church and speak only to himself and God. Two or three prophets should speak and the other should weigh carefully what's said. And if the revelation comes to someone who seated, the first speaker should stop.

And while they were saying this is because there were prophets who were sitting in the congregation who were examining what the other people were saying prophetically. So if the person standing up was speaking prophetically and he was speaking out of turn, it was the responsibility of the elder who was in the congregation to speak over the person who was speaking prophetically and bring correction to that person so that that person didn't bring confusion to the people.

For you can all be prophesy in turn so that everyone may be instructed and everyone may be encouraged. The spirit of prophets are subject to the prophets. For God is not a God of disorder, but he is a God of peace as in all the churches of the saints. And what he's saying here is that he's addressing a church that's out of order. The church in Corinth was out of order, but Paul knew that they all knew people from other churches that he had started. And so saying, "Listen, Cat, the church in Corinth say they're in order. The church in Ephesus, they're in order. They are no different than you, and you are no different than them." And so if these churches can be in order, if these churches can have peace, then you need to be in order and you need to have peace.

And then he says, "Women are to be silent in the churches. They're not permitted to speak, but they must be in submission as the law says. If they wish to inquire about something to ask their own husband at their home, for it's dishonorable for a woman to speak in the church. Did the word of God originate with you? Were you the only ones that it's reached? If anyone considers himself a prophet or a spiritual person, let him acknowledge that what I'm writing to you is the Lord's command. But if anyone ignores that, he himself shall be ignored.

So my brothers be eager to prophesy and don't forbid speaking in tongues, but everything must be done in a proper and orderly manner. Now, when God asked me to talk about this, I said, "Fool, you must be tripping. There's two more chapters. Why? Why could we close on this?" Sometimes I wonder why God always asks me to talk about the difficult passages because this passage is one of the most misunderstood portions of scripture in the entire book, and it has caused so much division.

Entire theological and doctrinal systems have risen up because of this portion of scripture. But I want to start today by saying be careful when you interpret things through your own narrow experiences. When I graduated from my undergrad, I hadn't taken a job yet because I'd been walking through the process of playing in the Canadian Football League. And so for a period of time, I went and I worked on Pastor Sonny's parents' ranch that is half in Montana and half in Wyoming. And they had a group of ranch hands, guys who'd spent their whole lives doing this stuff. Guys who were born wearing snap front shirts, belt buckles, and having Copenhagen in their back pockets.

I mean, their diapers had dip rings in the butt. I'm just saying, these guys had been doing this their whole life and they were the biggest bunch of narrow-minded, opinionated, sarcastic jerks I had ever met in my entire life. I'm just journeying here just for a minute. And it was these guys' goal to demean me or to diminish me. Because of their insecurities, they would talk down to me or they'd talk real slow.

Gosh, I can't stand when people talk slow, when they slow down. Anybody ever slow down talking for you? You know they're making fun of you. You know they think you're dumb. I'm just saying, "I'm Shawn. I'm here to encourage you today." And right away when I got there, they gave me a nickname. The nickname they gave me was Crawl from the Pauly Shore movie, from Son in Law. To this day, I can't stand Pauly Shore. "Hey, buddy." I can't do it anymore.

They constantly tried to make me feel stupid because I didn't just know how to do this stuff like this one thing that they were experienced at because they'd done it their whole lives. But listen, I wasn't stupid. I was highly educated and accomplished athlete and very well-spoken. Now, I'd never mended a fence or branded a cow, but these guys had never flown on a plane. They'd never traveled more than a hundred yards from their area. They'd never even read an entire book. I'm just saying you need to be real careful when you try to elevate your experiences over others.

These are the same guys who thought it was ridiculous for someone to drive a Ford or wear Levi's because their dad and his dad, and his dad's dad, and his dad's dad before him had always driven Dodgers and worn Wranglers. They were living their lives through their narrow experiences. But you can't live your life in a vacuum and you can't view scripture in a vacuum. And so many people have been looking at this passage of scripture through a vacuum, through a narrow view, and it's caused so much division. And Paul is talking about three things here.

A lot of people have made it about one, but he's really talking about and confronting three things, the tongues, prophecy, and women speaking in church. And all these issues have divided the church. Speaking in tongues, for example. Speaking in tongues is a gift. And not everybody has that gift. It's one of the gifts that Pastor Dallas talked about last week, one of those special abilities that are inside of us. And Paul really talks about nine of them in various places in his letters. And here, just a few chapters after what Pastor Dallas talked about last week as Paul is addressing these three things that we're dividing the church then, and quite frankly are still dividing it now.

He starts with tongues, which he says he does more than anyone else, and it's this beautiful gift. Scripture tells us that it is the initial evidence of what's called the baptism in the Holy Spirit. In Acts chapter 2, after spending this extended period of time praying and seeking God, the Holy Spirit descended upon them and they spoke in what's called other tongues, but those tongues had a purpose and Jesus tells us what that purpose was meant to be. He said, "When the Holy Spirit comes upon you, you will receive power." Why? To be my witnesses.

So the primary purpose of the Holy Spirit's presence in our lives is for us to point people toward Jesus. But like Pastor Dallas said last week, some people have used that power to point people to themselves. When I was in my undergrad, we used to have to go to chapel every day, five days a week, and then church on Sunday. And like today, worship was really powerful in those times. It was a Pentecostal Bible college, so it was very free-flowing, and sometimes the music would crescendo and you'd really feel the power of the Holy Spirit.

And then sometimes the crescendo would scoop down and you'd come into this lull in the music where it was maybe just a keyboard and it was quiet, and it was a time for people to reflect and to meditate on Jesus. And you could really feel the presence of the Holy Spirit in those moments. And about once a week there was a guy, same guy who just as it got quiet and as people really started to really feel the presence of the Holy Spirit, he would put his head down, and he always had the same intro, "Thus saith the Lord God of hosts. Yea thou, thee eyes [inaudible 00:15:56]." And I'd say, it's like, "God, I didn't even know you spoken King James anymore. I didn't even know you ever spoken King James."

But he would always give these long and tirades of thees, and thous and thuses." He just became a joke to the people because when you would walk by his house, there's a 50-50 chance you're going to hear him yelling at and cussing his wife out or that it was kind of known that he had a little bit of a problem with alcohol. But once a week he would, "Thee, thou," It wasn't the Holy Spirit. That was emotion. That was a guy that was trying to point attention away from the Holy Spirit and point attention towards themselves. There's always been people that have been abusing God's power, disruptors, providers.

I mean, we've had Pentecostals who have been trying to diminish non-Pentecostals because they don't speak in tongues. Years ago I was at this meeting of denominational leaders of a huge denomination in America of the mainstream church, and the guy who was in charge of the meeting, he called it to order and he said, "Brothers, we need to pray for the Baptists."

So I might not should have been there anyway. So I raised my hand up and I said, "Brother so-and-so, did you just say that we should pray for the Baptists? It feels like we should be praying for the lost because why are we praying for the Baptists?" He said, "Because, Brother Shawn, they don't speak in tongues." "Huh? Well, do you have to?" "Well, you can't go to heaven, folks, [inaudible 00:17:45]." I said, "For real? I never even read that. I've read the whole book. It must been like when I was reading Gresham and I forgot who Jimmy was. I must have forgot that you had to do this to get that because dang, I don't hardly never speak in tongue."

I said, "Then why are their churches bigger than ours? Why are their marriages better than ours? Why are their finances better than ours? They may not be speaking in tongues, but it feels like God's blessing everything that they do." This is the last time that I was ever invited to one of those meetings. That's all I'm saying. But we've also had non-Pentecostals, demeaning Pentecostals because they thought that they were weird and that they were going to have these out of control services.

So before I was in Green Bay, I used to just travel and preach in a different church every week. And one time a guy invited me to come preach a revival thing for him, which really just means four nights of church in a row, but they feel like it's going to be something. And so I didn't know this guy, which I didn't normally speak for people that I didn't know. And so we were on the front row. I remember it. He was about to intro me. He leaned over to me and he said, "Hey, I don't want you talking about none of that Holy Spirit stuff."

I said, "Hey, I didn't even know the Holy Spirit was stuff. I thought he was God. You don't want me talking about..." So I spent four nights trying to figure out how to not be filled with the Holy Spirit. It was because sometimes we want to diminish or demean what we are not. And so knowing that, Paul says, "I get it. Some of you have the gift of speaking in tongues. I love it. I speak in tongues all the time, but it needs to be done with a purpose to point people to Jesus." And so he said, "In the church, I'd rather speak five intelligible words to instruct others than 10,000 words in tongues."

And so he said, "If you're going to speak in tongues, you either need those tongues to be interpreted so everybody can understand and benefit, or you need to keep them to yourself. You need to sit down and stay silent in the church because there are tongues for you and there are tongues for others."

Then he talks about prophecy. And he says, "Bro, I love prophecy. If you have the gift of prophecy, please use it." In fact, he says, "He who prophesies speaks to men for their edification, encouragement, and comfort. The one who speaks in tongues, prophets himself, but the one who prophesies, edifies the church. I wish you could all speak in tongues, but I would rather you all prophesy. He who prophesies is greater than the one who speaks in tongues, watch this, unless he interprets those tongues so the church may be edified."

And prophecy is interesting. It can only be quantified in one of two ways, waiting and weighing. Waiting to see if it happens and weighing it against God's word. And there's been all kinds of false prophets throughout time. I mean, you could find them all over YouTube today, people sharing prophecies or making predictions that'll never come true when all they're doing is misleading people.

And so Paul says, "Guys, I love prophecy. I love that some of you have that gift and I want you to use it, but I don't want you to abuse it. So I need you to do it in its proper place and in its proper time. Otherwise, I'm going to need you to sit down and stay silent in the church." And then he addresses something that just might have become the most divisive issue within the church community, women speaking in church. And this is one that's obviously close to my heart, not only because I have a wife who speaks in church and a daughter who's called to do the same, I also have a bunch of spiritual daughters at this church who God has given a voice to. Pastor Shelby, Pastor Stephanie, Pastor Jessica, Pastor Tara, Pastor Megan.

I also have a spiritual sister who has written a program that has literally transformed the lives of thousands of people in Pastor Becky. And so this one for me is a non-negotiable. For me, this one is an impasse. If you don't speak in tongues, that doesn't bother me one bit. If you don't prophesy, homie, we can roll together. We can do ministry together for the rest of our lives. But if you are against women in ministry, if you are against female pastors, you and I cannot agree to disagree.

You and I cannot do ministry together because your outlook and your vision is too narrowed. And we have a subculture within the church at large that is trying to silence women, and it is ungodly and it is unbiblical. And so I don't want to read your books. I don't want to listen to your podcast. I don't want to speak at the same conference as you. I don't want to be friends. I don't want to sit next to each other at Lambeau because you are using God's name in vain.

And they're using this verse... And I wish somebody would see this online and send me a message and challenge me to debate about it because their evidence for this argument is this scripture, and it is non-contextual. They're saying, "Well, Paul said that women should be silent in church." And the problem with their viewpoint is it is lazy theology. And they are taking these words out of context because they're viewing them through a vacuum.

Whether that guy was a believer or not, he would be a masochist. Whether that guy was a believer or not, he would be a misogynist. And so that guy took his problem with women with a hurt or a wound that some woman gave him somewhere along the line, and then he stood behind a pulpit and had the nerve to act like it was God. I wish you would. I'll throw my iPad across this room.

You say, "You're a little bit worked up." Yeah, I am. You ever get that stroke vein in your neck? You say, "Why you worked up?" How do you know that what you are saying is right and what they're saying is wrong? Why? Because I have read every single word that Paul has written in this book multiple times. And time and time again, Paul not only endorses women in ministry, he places them in ministry.

In 1 Corinthians 11, Paul talks about women's right. This is two chapters, three chapters before. He talks about women's right to prophesy in the congregation. Three chapters before he's endorsing women in ministry and endorsing women speaking in ministry. When Paul was living in Corinth, he lived with Aquila and Priscilla, and he assigned Priscilla, the woman to teach Apollos, one of the most well-known preachers in the world at that time who happened to be passing through Alexandria. And Paul said, "Homegirl, I need you to correct this cat because he's off-target theologically."

So Paul assigned the wife, not the husband to correct the preacher man. When the church in the harbor town of Cenchreae needed a leader, Paul chose Phoebe, and he assigned her to be the deacon over the church. Not a deacon, the deacon. And the Greek word used to describe her position is diakonos. It literally means minister. It means pastor. Phoebe was clearly the leader, the minister, the pastor of that important church in a strategic town because Paul not only endorsed her, he also placed her.

Now, not only did Paul endorse and empower women in ministry, the Apostle Peter. You know the disciple that Jesus said he'd build his church upon and the gates of hell would not prevail against it, who the Catholics believed was the first ever pope? On the day of Pentecost, Peter said, "In the last days, God says, I will pour out my spirit on all people, your sons and your, uh-oh, daughters will prophesy. Your young men will see visions. Your old men will dream dreams. Even on my servants," wait for it, "both men and women, I will pour out my spirit. And in those days, they men and women will prophesy."

Luke, the writer of the gospel and the acts of the apostles and Paul's constant ministry companion in his gospel recorded what's called the Song of Mary. And in doing so, he affirmed Mary as a teacher of theology and social ethics for the entire church, for as long as his gospel shall survive and be read. Now, if Paul, Peter, and Luke aren't authoritative enough for you, when Jesus was resurrected, the first people he appeared to were women, and he sent them to the men to spread the same message that he's told us to spread the most important message that will ever be spread, that he is alive.

Do we really think in our passage from 1 Corinthians, do we really think in our passage from 1 Corinthians 14 today that Paul is overthrowing all of this? Can we really assume that Paul would be sitting in Priscilla's house where she housed and fed him for 18 months and that he'd be writing these words and insulting her by telling her and her fellow women doing ministry in that community that they can do ministry, they could play the piano, they can work with the kids, they can cook meals, but they can't speak?

The same Priscilla who he had already assigned to prophesy in the temple. Can we really think that he has just now thrown all that out? Only if you're viewing it through a narrow lens. So the question arises, how can we understand the text? Like any other text, we have to zoom out. We have to look at the context, the culture, and the community that these words were written into.

Corinth was the largest, most diverse city in Greece. People came literally from all over the world to live and work there, but they lived in pockets. And those pockets were based upon their nationality and upon their language. It's like old-school New York City, or when I was a kid, Detroit used to still be segregated into pockets. You used to have the Polish part of town. You used to have the Italian part of town. You used to have the Mexican part of town. Used to have the Puerto Rican part of town. That's why I said Mexican. It wasn't a Latino part of town. You had a Mexican part of town, you had the Colombian part of town, you had a Cuban part of town, you had Chinatowns, all that stuff.

Listen, if you wanted some good egg rolls, don't go to Polish part of town. They got dope pierogies, but they don't got good egg rolls. But don't go to Mexican village looking to get pierogies because when you get there, you're going to get the most bomb burrito you've ever had in your whole entire life at Xochimilco's downtown Detroit. That's a free advertisement in Jesus' name. Greatest burrito you'll ever have in your whole entire life. So when you go to Detroit this year to Ford Field to watch us beat the Lions, make sure you go to Xochimilco's in... Don't I sound like a radio commercial right now?

I'm just saying at Corinth, it was the same thing. They were all connected, they were all segregated, they were all in pockets. And the women and children almost never went outside their pocket, which meant they had almost no need to learn or speak Greek. I mean, even the men would've only learned functional Greek just enough to be able to function in their jobs. Plus less than 10% of people in the first century Mediterranean world were literate. Less than 10% of the people in the Mediterranean world at that time knew how to read or write.

So everything was processed orally and it was often processed orally in real time. So even now at universities in the Middle East, students often will lean over to each other during lectures and ask each other questions to better understand the professor's information. In fact, when the professors will turn his back to write on the board or whatever, it is common that the students, a roar of the students will begin to break up because they take that as their opportunity to be able to ask each other questions. And it's not because they're being disrespectful, it's because they're being respectful enough to try to understand the information that's being given to them that was worked so hard at by the professor.

So in first century Corinth, when they went to church, the challenge of comprehending what the speaker was saying in their second, maybe their third language, especially taking the speaker's accent into account, it was beyond challenging. So when the speaker said something that wasn't understood, people, especially the women who were more social and had their kids sitting around their feet would inevitably lean over to each other and it would start to murmur or they would start to chatter to one another saying things like, "What did he just say? Or what does that word mean?"

And the chatter would begin to build, making it impossible to hear the speaker. So one of the senior elders inevitably would stand up and in a desperate voice, he would shout, "Let the women in the church be silent." And when they got calm, the speaker would proceed. That's what Paul was proactively trying to do here. In fact, the Greek word that Paul uses for speak in verse 34 is the word laleo. It literally means to chatter.

So he's saying, "Ladies, before we even get to the church where incidentally men and women were sat separately, there was a six-foot divider in between them, and they were sat separately so that the men wouldn't be distracted by their kids so that the men could focus better so that they could retain the information and share it with their family, which guys start retaining the information so that on the way home, you're not talking about the NHL Stanley Cup or you're not talking about cars or something that your wife has already tuned you out about."

What if you got in the car and you had retained some of this information and in the car on the way home, you started regurgitating the things and you guys talked about this so that it would stick with you. I'm just saying, I'm just saying, Father's Day is next week, and can I say we have a dope men's ministry? The men's thing is so... Like Called to Greatness, I wish I would've been a part of that when I was growing up and developing and seeing these men rise up and seeing these men become leaders within this church and within their family, it is dope.

And it is time for us as men to take the information and grasp our responsibility and to be able to regurgitate it, feed it to our little baby chicks that are in the car because they're going to imitate whatever it is you do and talk about whatever it is you talk about. And so Paul was saying, "Ladies, before you even get to the church, if you don't understand something, don't lean over and chat with each other, it's going to be a distraction. Wait, till you get home and ask your husband." Not because the husband was superior to her, but because he just by the nature of his job, understood more of the language than she did.

Now, that context in and of itself should be enough to let us know that Paul isn't saying that women can't lead or that women can't preach in churches or that women can't be pastors. But just in case it isn't, Dr. Kenneth E. Bailey, one of the most revered theologians the world has ever seen, who spent over 30 years as a professor at elite universities across the Middle East, including the prestigious University of Jerusalem, published a groundbreaking paper establishing the fact that in verses 34 and 35, Paul was likely being sarcastic. He was actually quoting and confronting an errant Corinthian slogan like he did in 1 Corinthians 6:12, 7:1 and 10:23. Remember the one I talked about a few weeks ago that all things are lawful?

He was doing that same thing here toward a Corinthian slogan, women should be silent. That was being propagated by this new Christian group who started out trying to guard themselves, particularly the married men from the overly sexual culture that pervaded Corinth. And so they were trying to keep married men from being seduced by sexual women within the Corinth community. And so they were telling the men that these women, these hussies, they should be quiet.

And I'm sure that the intentions were good in the beginning, but just like all other intentions, it didn't take long before it became a sexist group who blamed women for their temptations and shortfalls and insisted on a strong subordination of women where they were suppressed, where they suppressed all women because of the promiscuity of some. But you need to be real careful when you try to elevate your experiences over others.

And Paul's sarcasm is actually proven and supported in the following verses. It's like, Paul was like this. "Oh, oh, I get it." Oh, women shouldn't speak, they should be silent in church. Watch this. Did the word of God originate with you? Are you the only ones it's reached?" Listen, if anyone considers himself a prophet or a spiritual person, let him acknowledge that I'm writing to you something that's from the Lord's command. But if anyone, watch this ignores this, what he just said, if anyone ignores this, he himself will be ignored.

I mean, see how much richer scripture becomes when we zoom out, when we don't rush, when we don't hurry, when we don't look at it through our own narrow viewpoints. He wasn't saying that we shouldn't speak in tongues or that we shouldn't prophesy or that women can't minister in churches. He was saying, "You can do all of that. You just have to do all of it in order." I mean, we're all out of order in some way, aren't we? I mean, for me, I've spent most of my life being in and out of order with food, with my eating.

For some of you, it's your anger or your attitude, or your anxiety. For some of you, it's alcohol or how you use prescription drugs. For some of you, you work too much so your family is falling apart. I mean, no matter what it is, it's normally because we're looking at our lives through a narrow viewpoint. Like for me, somewhere along the line, I determined that I thought that food would make me feel better. Maybe you thought alcohol would chase away the memories or that you working 12 hours a day, seven days a week would give your family a better life. And those thoughts are out of order.

But the good news is they may not be completely broken. It may just be one piece, and if you just replace or you repair that one thing, everything will start working again. I wonder where are you skipping a step? Where are you functioning through a narrow viewpoint that's got you out of order? I wonder if you'll do the hard work of figuring out where you're skipping a step of finding that one piece or that one part that's broken and replace or repair it today. I hope so. Because if you will, everything else will start working better.

Would you close your eyes all across this place? Salvation is just the idea of fixing one thing. There's one thing that's dominated your life. There's sin in your life, and the minute that you confess that and profess that Jesus can change you, everything else, doesn't get perfect, but it does get better. I wonder if you're here today and your life is a bit of a wreck. You've been trying to figure out how to navigate through being a good man or a good woman, and you've just tried everything else. And so today you found yourself here and you thought, "I need Jesus."

I want to give you the opportunity to receive him into your life, to welcome him into your life, to make him your Lord and Savior. Lord just means that he has all authority and Savior just means that you acknowledge that he rescued you. So doing that really requires two things, confession and profession. Confessing that you have unresolved sin in your life, and then confessing that you believe that Jesus can eradicate you of that. And so I'm going to give you the opportunity to do that in just a moment. We're going to do two things.

First is in a minute with every head bowed and every eye closed. I'm going to ask for people who don't have a relationship with Jesus, but want one to raise their hand and make eye contact with me. Once you do that, you put your hand down. That's your act of confession. Then I'm going to say a few lines in a prayer. I'm going to pause, and when I pause, I would like everyone in here to repeat what I just said. And if you are part of those everyone and you repeat it and you mean it in your heart, the Bible says, "You will be saved."

So if you're here and you say, "Shawn, I don't have a relationship with Jesus, but I'd like one." If that's you, with nobody looking around, would you raise your hand and make God contact with me? Thanks, thanks, thanks, thanks, thanks, thanks, thanks, thanks, thanks. Anybody over here? Thanks, thanks, thanks, thanks, thanks. Did I miss anybody? I already went long. I'm not in any hurry. Thanks. Thanks.

Okay. I'm going to ask everybody in here to say these words. Say, "Jesus, I've got sin in my life. I don't want it. Please take it. Please forgive it. Come into my life. Be my savior. In Jesus name, amen." Secondly, before we go, maybe you're here and you say, "Shawn, I'm a believer. I'm a Jesus guy, or I'm a Jesus girl, but there's something in your life that's out of order. For me, a couple of months ago, I was in my prayer time and I felt like the Lord said, "You've spent 50 years of your life being out of order when it comes to food. I need you to stop. You're better than that. You are smarter than that. You are stronger than that. I don't want you to live your life in the insecurity of being fat anymore. Stop."

After I was sad because my friend insulted me. I said, "How?" God said, "Just stop eating sugar. It's poison for you. It doesn't work for you. Just stop eating sugar." And so two months ago, I just did that. I just said, "Okay, fine." It became a spiritual thing for me, honestly. I said, "Okay, God, I'll take out the sugar." Now, was I going to go to hell for eating sugar? No. That's ridiculous. Am I going to be kept out of heaven because I'm fat? I mean, listen, the Bible says we're going to get a new body. Why am I wasting my time working out now? It's ridiculous. And God was like, "Don't be dumb. That's dumb. That's out of context."

And so I just thought, "Fine, God." That is one thing that was robbing me of my affection. And so I don't know what your thing is. It could be sugar. It could be anger. It could be lying. It could be exaggerating. I don't know what that thing may be, but I can guarantee you that some of you have some things here that aren't going to send you to hell, but that are wrecking your marriage and that are affecting your kids, or affecting your parents, or affecting your job. And so my question is, do you have anything in here in your life that is out of order? And if you do, I want to pray for you.

So if that's you, would you just pop your hand up? You got anything in your life that's out of order? Wow. Yeah. God, for my courageous friends, thank you, God, that they're willing to acknowledge that there's just a tweak. It's not a complete remodel. It's just a tweak. One thing that needs to be repaired or replaced that give them the courage to do that. Give them the strength to do that. Give them the foreknowledge on how to do that, Lord, that you would bless them and keep them, that you would make your faith to shine upon them and that you would give them peace. In Jesus' name, amen.

#pastorshawn #womeninministry #femalepastors #pastorsonny

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nicklloydnow · 11 months ago

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“Cave, 66, is one of the world’s great singer-songwriters – from the howling post-punk of the Birthday Party and the Bad Seeds to the lugubrious lyricism of his love songs (Into My Arms, Straight to You and a million others I adore) and the haunted grief of recent albums such as Skeleton Tree, Ghosteen and Carnage. He is also a fine author (see his apocalyptic novel And the Ass Saw the Angel), thinker (his book of conversations with the Observer journalist Sean O’Hagan, Faith, Hope and Carnage), agony uncle (at his website, the Red Hand Files), screenwriter (The Proposition) and now visual artist. Which is where he started out half a century ago.

(…)

Cave became famous as one of the bad boys of rock – a ghoulish junkie with a feral live act, equally fixated by the Bible and Beelzebub. But he is one of the nicest people I have met. In 2008, I turned up knowing sod all about him. I tell him that he was so generous with his time and nonjudgmental about my ignorance. “Really?” he says, surprised. “That’s good to know. I tend to have a low opinion of myself back then. I see a cutoff point around the death of my first son of a change of character. But it’s not as black and white as I thought.”

(…)

Does he feel culpable for the death of his sons? “I think it’s something that people who lose children feel regardless of the situation, simply because the one thing you’re supposed to do is not let your children die.” He comes to another abrupt stop, almost as if he is dictating notes. “Forget that. The one thing you’re supposed to do is protect your children.”

(…)

Does he feel culpable because drugs were involved in Arthur’s death? “There could be some element of that, yep. Look, these things are in our DNA, they’re inherited. I don’t want to make any assumptions about Arthur, who was just a young boy. It’s not like he was into drugs … On a fundamental level, it’s against nature to be burying your children. And there can’t help but be feelings of culpability.”

(…)

Cave says one way in which he has changed is that he appreciates life more. In the past, he has described learning to live again, refinding happiness, as an act of defiance. But he no longer thinks it’s an appropriate word. “Defiance has a fuck-you element to the world; we’re not going to let it get us down. That sounds a little too heroic now. I’m pretty simple-minded about things. It says something to my children who have died that I can enjoy my life now. It’s what they would want. I think it’s a softer relationship we have to the world now.”

Rather than a two-fingered salute to fate, it goes back to culpability and his Christian (if questioning) faith. “Look, this is extremely difficult to talk about, but one of the things that used to really worry me is that Arthur, wherever he may be, if he is somewhere, somehow understands what his parents are going through because of something he did, and that his condition of culpability is not dissimilar to mine. And I think that’s the reason behind a lot of what I do. It’s to say it’s OK. I mean it’s not OK, but we’re OK. We’re OK. I think Susie feels that, too.”

He stresses that he is not just talking about his personal tragedies. “What’s it saying to all those who’ve passed away in their multitudes if we lead lives where we’re just pathologically pissed off at the world? What does it say to those who have left the world to be in a perpetual state of misery and fury and depression and cynicism towards the world? What legacy are they leaving if that’s how we manifest the passing of that person?”

He thinks people sometimes misunderstand what he is saying about loss. It’s not that there is more joy in his world than there was – far from it. But when it comes, it tends to be more intense. “Joy is something that leaps unexpectedly and shockingly out of an understanding of loss and suffering. That’s how Susie and I are. That’s in no way saying we’re not affected, or we’ve somehow gotten over it, or we’ve had closure or even acceptance. I think closure is a dumb thing. Even acceptance is, like: ‘Just give it a few years and life goes back to how it was.’ It doesn’t happen. You’re fundamentally changed. Your very chemistry is changed. And when you’re put back together again, you’re a different person. The world feels more meaningful.”

He knows plenty of people disagree with him. “I get people, mothers particularly, occasionally saying: ‘How dare you suggest there is joy involved in any of this?’ People are so angry, and they have every right to be enraged by the fucked-up cosmic mischief that goes on, and it’s deeply unfair. But it’s not personal. It feels like it is, but it’s just the vicissitudes of life.”

(…)

“Conservatism is a difficult word to talk about in Britain, because people immediately think of the Tories. But I do think small-C conservatism is someone who has a fundamental understanding of loss, an understanding that to pull something down is easy, to build it back up again is extremely difficult. There is an innate need in us to rip shit down, and I’m personally more cautious in that respect without it being a whole political ideology that surrounds me.”

Is he a Tory? “I’m not a Tory, no.” Has he ever been? “No. No, I’ve never voted Tory.” And is he really anti-woke? “The concept that there are problems with the world we need to address, such as social justice; I’m totally down with that. However, I don’t agree with the methods that are used in order to reach this goal – shutting down people, cancelling people. There’s a lack of mercy, a lack of forgiveness. These go against what I fundamentally believe on a spiritual level, as much as anything. So it’s a tricky one. The problem with the right taking hold of this word is that it’s made the discussion impossible to have without having to join a whole load of nutjobs who have their problem with it.”

He hates dogma, whether religious or political. His work has always embraced uncertainty. “People don’t like me to say this, but I do feel it’s in my nature to constantly be redressing the balance of my own ideas about things. My mother was exactly the same – she always saw the other side. It was incredibly frustrating. You’d be angry about something and she’d go: ‘Yes darling, but …’”

Like his mother, he has never shied away from the trickiest “buts”. When he talks about his appalling loss, he also knows he has been lucky. Not only has he been able to express his grief in his work, but it has also fed his creativity. Even at its bleakest, he has found it cathartic. “Making art is in itself the great expression of joy and optimism, in my view. That’s why we need it. Music, art, reminds us of our fundamental capacity to create beautiful things out of the fuckeries of life. Even when I’m making The Devil Kills His First Child, I’m not depressed, I’m like: ‘Wow! Look at the head!’ It’s a joyful occupation, no matter what. And when I’m singing a very sad lyric, it doesn’t mean I’m sad inside.””

#nick cave

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funshinebf · 1 year ago

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having divorced parents and one parent that abused you while the other was actually really awesome is so wild cause its like. yes i had a bad childhood yes i had a good childhood. my dad always seems to feel so guilty for me and my brother being so messed up but its so hard to explain how bad it was at my moms. and even still i have the problem of having a complicated relationship with my mom so any discussion of things shes done to me make me feel bad like its unfair to her. like i love my mom and i always will but she has improved so much over the years, and not living with her has improved my life. i could never cut her off and i dont really want to anyway, but sometimes im jealous of people who can go no contact and not look back. i think its also more complicated cause i have two sisters that are much younger than me so its like i can see all the places my moms improved from my childhood in how she raises them. i think parents are destined to fail their children in some areas. i think even the most well meaning parents will still make mistakes and be human. but being human itself makes harming people and being harmed inevitable. its just the reality, everyone you know will let you down in some way or another. but i think the world looks brighter once you start to accept this. it sounds like im being cynical and negative, but i think it makes me quicker to forgive people and continue moving forward. if i can understand their motivations for what harmed me i can forgive them. but when i dont understand why they would do that to someone i start to feel truly wronged by it. if i cant find a good enough reason to justify harming someone then i cant forgive it and i cant get rid of the scars it leaves. i cant forget it. i could never do that to someone. how could anybody do that to someone. my intrusive thoughts alone send me into a guilt ridden trance as soon as they form, i could never understand being able to hurt someone so purposefully. for what? amusement? what could someone possibly gain from that? what could they gain that would erase any of the guilt? i think my least favorite type of person is the person that recognized that ive been hurt before, and targets me because of it. i hate when i share my weaknesses with someone and they use it to manipulate me and harm me even more. its happened more times than id like to admit. usually im not too burdened by my scars. the weights on my shoulders have settled into a dull ache. but then, like tripping over a pebble and splitting my brain on the curb, all it takes is one person with ill intentions to send me into another state of constant aching. i want to be stronger. i want to be less trusting. but how could feeling less love be beneficial? when such simple, unassuming kindnesses from others send me into a joyful daze? i love the world, i love people, i love the glimpses of warmth in a vast, cold sea. if i dont let myself feel things then i cant enjoy things either. so i let myself stay soft, and trusting, and far too genuine far too early. i wouldnt trade the love for anything else. if i can continue to feel love then i can handle any pain. anyways im high as all fuck and in therapist mode really badly so im gonna stop spilling my guts on a public website full of people i want to like me and not think im weird. like yeah okay idgaf about EVERY tumblr users opinion but like i have friends on here and potential friends and irl friends that see my posts. i want them to like me because i love having these connections, no matter how brief. im doing it again im just gonna hit post and hope for the best

#my post #long #ask to tag #uhhhh #almost tagged this as just 'disorders' and nothing else

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treadmilltreats · 2 years ago

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Letting life get to you

I remember one day while I was at work, one of my guys from the back came in complaining of clients and factory delays. He was so upset and was just really letting it get to him. I couldn't help but laugh, and he turned to look at me like he thought I was nuts.

He wanted to know what I thought was so funny. I explained that I had just written a blog about being happy and that all the stuff that happens with this business or my business means nothing when it comes to my inner happiness.

Yes, things are going to go wrong. Clients are going to yell, but none of it will affect my happiness. This is not what makes my life complete. Yes, we all have to work for a living, but it's not who you are truly.

It's not the end all to be all, it is what you have to do to pay the bills, and if you happen to love your job it's that much easier but it still doesn't give you all your happiness.

So if it's a bad day, am I going to let it affect my joy? Oh hell no, I am going to laugh it off and go on with my happy self, piss on you! You will not steal my joy!

People, so many of you take life so seriously, you need to laugh, because life is way too short, so put it in perspective.

I'll never forget this one day when me and my girlfriend and I were riding our bikes on the boardwalk. It was a beautiful midweek day, and we both happened to be lucky enough to be off and enjoy it. There was hardly anyone on the boardwalk. The wind was blowing, the ocean was blue and flat, and it was just the most perfect day to be at the beach.

We were driving side by side just talking about how lucky we were to be here and enjoying this day, when this older lady came from the other direction and screamed at us, "SINGLE FILE!!!"

She was so angry that we weren't riding a single file on the bike path. Her face was red, the veins were coming out in her neck, and she had her fist in a ball waving it at us. Yes, she was that pissed off!!

Well... I started to laugh so hard I almost fell off my bike. Really? It's a beautiful day. We are alive and healthy to be able to do this. Is this what is going to set you off? Really? Because we are not riding our bikes in a single file line? When there is nobody on the beach?

I laughed for a good 20 minutes because I felt sorry for her for being so angry about something so minor. You have a problem, and dear God, I don't ever want those problems.

So today, my friends, I am here to tell you to enjoy every second you are given. Be fully present in the moment, laugh loud and often. Let the stresses of work go, and let the stresses of life go, because worrying about them changes nothing! Nothing!

Tell me one time that your worrying affected the outcome of something? Never! So why waste that emotion? Let it go, be happy, break out of your single file life, and laugh!!

I promise you, things will look so much better when you do.

"Be the change you want to see,"

@TreadmillTreats

"Be the change you want to see"

@Treadmilltreats

"And just when the caterpillar thought his life over...he turned into a beautiful butterfly"

**Now released my latest book**

The Blessing in Disguise.... revealed

https://www.amazon.com/Blessing-Disguise-Revealed-story-faith/dp/1074340493/ref=sr_1_19?keywords=the+blessing+in+disguise&qid=1561392004&s=books&sr=1-19

***Now available***

My 1st book The blessing in Disguise

Selling on my website:

Http://www.treadmilltreats.com

And on Amazon.com

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#treadmilltreats

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#Oprah

#TylerPerry

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bellmo15-blog · 2 years ago

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Games That Nintendo Totally Wants You To Forget

Greatings and salutations my followers. Mobell the Spectacualr here for another lazy click bait and hyperbolic… I mean well researched discussion for you all today. Today’s topic is one I’m sure you have seen been thrown around online a lot and because I gotta trend surf for that ad revenue I’m gonna throw my metaphorical hat into the ring and tell you about a bunch of Nintendo games that Nintendo totally wants you to forget about. But before I get into the content your reading this for I just want to derail for a few seconds and tell you that if you do enjoy this journal about a topic I haven’t even started talking about yet then don’t forget to follow me because 100% of you who read my stuff aren’t even followers of mine and I demand you do because I say so and I like big numbers and feeling like my content that I totally don’t just copy paste from other websites means something. Also I just want to say that this video is also sponsored by todays sponsor Generic VPN. ALSO also don’t forget to share and spam this journal to your friends and every Discord server you’re on because I gotta get that clout!

All right, now that we are done I guess I can finally get into talking about the topic like I really should of a minuet ago instead of dragging out my intro. And our first game that Nintendo totally wants you to forget about is…

Splatoon!

“Wait, Splatoon is one of Nintendo’s most popular IP’s right now? Why would Nintendo want us to ‘forget’ it exists?” Well yes random person you are right! BUT it’s not the franchise that Nintendo wants you to forget. It’s the previous games in the franchise! How you ask? BECAUSE SPLATOON 3 EXSISTS!!! You see, often when a game gets a sequel it will often include new mechanics and improvements that will make it a way better game and give you literally no reason to bother going back and playing the previous game because it doesn’t have the new stuff that makes the newer game fun and makes going to previous games hard! And let’s be honest people, and I mean completely and 100% honest, the original Splatoon was released on what’s objectivlly Nintendo’s worst console the Wii U and they TOTALLY want you to forget about that!

… What’s that? What do you mean there’s DLC for Splatoon 3 that let’s you return to Inkopolis Square from Splatoon 1? And makes Spike the guy you go see to order new gear that other players have? … Uhh okay, bad exsamlpe! Maybe instead we move on to…

F-Zero

Now this is one that I know for certain Nintendo wants you to forget! F-Zero! No new game in 2 decades. Now how is that NOT Nintendo wanting you to forget it exists?!?!

… Wait, what do you mean “How could I forget that Captain Falcon is in every single Super Smash Bros game?” AND they re-release the first two F-Zero games on Nintendo Switch Online? Oh dam. Okay umm, how can I save this… Okay, here’s one they DEFIENTLLY want you to forget!

Oh but before we move on, allow me to break the flow of this list for just a second to tell you about today’s sponsor, Generic VPN! Your internet privacy doesn’t matter to just about anyone nowadays and our sponsor is one of those people who will spy on you…. I mean, help keep your privacy actually private for once! By using a complex internet systems that tracks your location so that we can sell your data to other countries, you can even change your location to get access to region exclusive movies and shows so everyone knows you only watch that one Disney movie for that one scene. Be paranoid about your internet privacy today!

Jak and Daxtar

Let’s see, no new game since the late 2000’s, the newest game they did release was seen as terrible and no news of a new one since then! They is no way you can… Oh come on! What do you mean this isn’t even Nintendo? This feels like it should be a Nintendo game! I mean the whole plot and focus on lore is just ripped off from Zelda isn’t it!?!? Okay fine, I got one more! And there’s no way anyone can argue that THIS is a game Nintendo wants you to forget!

Bayonetta

Yes people, Nintendo wants you to forget that Bayonetta exists! And before you come up with the excuse they just released Bayonetta 3 and that one spin off, let’s look at how Bayonetta 3 ends shall we? Oh and, spoilers ahead you nerds! Bayonetta dies!!! Now THAT is a key sign that they want you to forget about her! They don’t want to work on this franchise anymore! And what better way to ensure that then by killing off the main character!

And that about does it ladies and gentlemen! A whole bunch of game from the big N that they totally want to forget ignoring the fact that if they really did want us all to forget then they would be actively trying to erase all traces of those games from the internet and not even bother referencing them whenever a new Smash game comes around. Now I’m off to go harass them into making a new Ice Climbers game and saying how The Legend of Zelda isn’t good anymore as if my own personal opinion is suddenly objective fact while figuring out how I can drag this video out for 20 min’s while also sucking the Nintendo Gamecubes dick all for that sweet, sweet views and money!

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deviantartdramahub · 2 years ago

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You have the nerve to say this -> Status by Morothias on DeviantArt. Aren't you the one who claimed to be Jellybeanism who happens to be a completely diffrent person! I thought it was a bit weird when I saen that username on Yahoo Answers, talking nothing like you do on DeviantArt. I thought nothing of it at the time, but now, I see why you changed your name. Here is how I know. First of all, let's take a trip down memory line. Copying and pasting somebody else's comment or note or complaint is easy, uh, not that I do that myself of course. Why would I when all I have to do is read whatever the person I'm talking too, or whoever is talking about me for whatever reason. And then think of a reply and job done, however, BirdThatWhispers on the other hand; Nah...his ideal solution would be to come up with a fabricated lie using old complaints made by other people about him. Comments or notes or anything that gives him the advantage to use against his current victim(s) so he can manipulate people into thinking he's being honest. BirdThatWhispers will try passing the blame on to somebody else so he can go after women or children for sexual fetish roleplays, and this is all on a website designed for artists and art enthusiasts. What a "nice guy" huh, and I mean that in a STRONG and VERY sarcastic tone of voice, BirdThatWhispers is a twisted and sick individual altogether. His limits don't stop there either, he would do that kind of crap with 12-year-old girls or boys who don't know any different. And what is the big fetish he enjoys the most? Spanking them at bedtime with a wooden hairbrush on their bare behinds.... what a freak BirdThatWhispers truly is...and I'm not kidding, I have a screenshot of him doing a roleplay with a 14-year-old girl. Does that sound anything like what that creepy prick told you, Eve? I bet you anything it wasn't. But the point I'm making here is, YOU'RE the same! You said so yourself, you can't handle the pressure, and while you "burst" into a rage against whomever, me in most cases, you can't bring yourself to shut up and read what the person is saying to you! Like you, he bullied somebody who had a condision. Like you, Bird didn't care and continued to attack. And also like Bird, you took a username that somebody else had, and pretended to be them so you could get money... money that is meant for people who suffered in that quake... I mean, do you have no shame? Do you enjoy making fun of people have condisions too like BirdThatWhispers, aka AnimeCitizen, aka whatever the fuck he goes by now....huh? Do you? You think was making fun of that prick Armstrongy85 because I thought he was a "cool person", fuck no! I thought and still do think he's a nasty pace of work liek you, a bully who thinks he can just log on and talk shit to people because they won't listen to him! And let's not forget, I've had some nuppty, you, in other words, give me empty threats because you actually believes a I'm just going to roll over accept defeat. Well, as much as I love bursting your bubble, Evie, I'm doing it again now. Nah, I'm not gonna stop or give up, I don't need a DA account to show the World what a horrable peace of shit you truly are! This isn't over, Evie... It's NOT OVER BY A LONG SHOT!

I have yet to see anything from either side of this conflict which could ever be considered proof. One side has a list of supposed alts, and has dedicated their profile to talking about what they consider to be an utmost pressing issue, but I'm sure they know the first thing that would be asked of them by a court (which includes this Tumblr group, which aspires to be a court) is how they came to think all the users they speak of are the same individual. To this day, this question has not been answered? Will today be any different? Only they have the power to make it that way. On the other hand, the accuser in turn has been accused of being a sexual deviant. But based on what?

I'm not sure who is a nice guy here, but each side throwing around claims isn't nice, and tragically the one provable thing here is digital artists being needy enough with money that they fall into what many would call this clash with humanitarianism that has been alluded to here and elsewhere. Yet it would be convenient for all of them to come here to explain themselves since all the claims about each other hold equal water.

#Eve #Soderlund

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callmearcturus · 3 years ago

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How to Read Whomstve in 2021

Hey Arc, what are you doing?

I'm getting into this thing called Whomstve—

You mean you're back into Homest—

SSSSSSHHHHH don't say its name!

It's Complicated.

So if you don't know, here is the abbreviated version: I started reading Whomstve on the day it ended, the day of the final [S] Act 7 animation, because I watched it on a whim and said "man this music is fucking rad, I should finally try to read this," and then I did.

Then, a few years later, after the completion of the story, Hussie and their compatriots released The Home/stuck Epilogues, which were bad. They were very, very bad and in a specifically very hateful, vindictive way, and they essentially decimated the fandom. Many people left within a month. Most were gone in a year. And they were right to, in my opinion.

(You know how Game of Thrones was the cash cow Cultural Moment and then the finale happened and it fucking vanished from popular consciousness? It was like that, except imagine GOT had a decent ending and people kept enjoying it and then three years later they released a new ending that ruined the show. That's the Epilogues.)

Fast forward to about…. the end of September, 2021. A full 900 days after the Epilogues Happened, I was struck with a thought:

Man. I miss Jake English.

And now, three or four weeks later, I'm into Whomstve.

Okay why "whomstve" tho?

I think my friend Asherinn started this, it was our little way to bitch about the epilogues without winding up on the Tumblr search. Now, to me, Whomstve very specifically means "Home//stuck, before the (Not Actually) Post-Canon content." It's the story I loved.

What I found surprising is that… and this shocked me a lot, trust me: Whomstve is still good. I've done the relisten and it's good, actually. I'm stunned, actually.

When the Epilogues happened, one of the predominate emotions myself and others had was a sense of "were we wrong? was it always bad and we just didn't see it?"

Hi. I'm here. And no, it was good once. And that part still is.

Now you're gonna tell me how to get into """Whomstve"""" right?

Yeah, p much.

I have a few thoughts on this. I'll try to be concise—

Actually I'm impatient, just tell me what to do.

Fine, the short version:

Read Acts 1 through 3, either on the Home//stuck website or using the Unofficial Home//stuck Collection.

Switch to Lets Read Home//stuck starting with Act 4, and continue on from there.

Switch back to the website or UHSC when you run out of LRHS. It'll get you most of the way to the end.

Stop at [S] Act 7 or [S] Credits. Do not read the Epilogues.

Hit me up for fic recs.

Now, the long version.

ONE: Whomstve is best read and understood in archival format, and anyone who tells you differently is incorrect.

For clarity: the "live read" is having read the comic as it was updating. The "archive read" is having read it as a complete, finished story.

I am 1000% certain that being in the fandom during the live update cycle of the story was very cool and very specific and frankly an experience that will never be repeated. I know and respect that.

However, if you have heard shit about how HS is difficult to understand or even impossible or that it doesn't make sense— this is because the Live Read is vastly inferior to the Archive Read when it comes to your reading comprehension. Many of the complaints people have about the story are solved by experiencing it as a complete story, when you set the pace of your read, and you don't have literally months of downtime between updates in which people spin so much conjecture and theorycraft that their actual understanding of canon is hampered.

So. To appreciate the story, forget all the memes and shit, all the fandom history around it, and just read the fucking story, and it will be great. I promise.

TWO: Okay but should I skip to the trolls.

Act One and Two are not very interesting, compared to the rest of the story.

There, said it.

Unless you imprint on the first hero of the story, John Egbert, you can feel free to just fucking speedread the first two acts of the story. Here, I'll summarize what happens:

It's John Egbert's birthday. He has three best friends, Dave Strider, Rose Lalonde (you'll love her), and Jade Harley. They are destined to play a video game named SBURB that unbeknownst to them will end the world. (Kinda, don't worry about it.) By playing the game, they ascend into the game's world. Each of them have to join the game, and the circumstances around them doing so become increasingly complicated. Through Acts One and Two, John enters the game, then Rose enters the game, whilst we learn about each of the kids and start to learn hints about the greater mythology of SBURB.

It's reading through Acts 1 to 3, but like. Briskly. Act 4 is where shit pops tf off.

(Hell there is an in-canon recap I can link you if you REALLY wanna go fast.)

Wait wait you want me to read THREE FUCKING ACTS before it gets good?

No. It's good. It just doesn't get great until Act 4, imo. You know how The Magnus Archives was never a bad show but that fucker took tf off in season three and four? Yeah, that.

Oh and this is important to understand.

Yeah. Trust me, it'll go quick.

(oh and important to note: this isn't even accurate because pages have varying amounts of words. a page can be a 500 word conversation between characters, or it can be a two sentence joke, or it could be an animation. i looked for a word count chart and failed to find one. I strongly suspect Acts 1-3 are even smaller than this chart conveys. anyway.)

THREE: You mentioned that you "listen" to HS above.

I feel like this is extremely and useful, especially because I know a lot of my followers are into audio-media like podcasts.

I have properly read HS three times. I have listened to Lets Read Home//stuck probably about 7 times. It is my preferred way to experience the comic. I think starting with Act 4, you can and possibly should just put on LRHS and experience the story that way.

Why not Acts 1 thru 3? The production values and voice acting from Act 4 and onward are extremely fucking listenable, and occasionally they are even better than just reading the comic. There are no truly Bad performances, only about two I would call mediocre, and more than 15 I would call really goddamn fucking good, and about three I think deserve fucking acting accolades. Also the Hivebent Narrator's voice is hot, I'm sorry.

Isn't it a different experience than reading the comic on the site? Yes, but in a good way. A few years ago, HS as a property was acquired by Viz Media, and a lot of little things in the comic have been altered and lost due to this. Most of the comic was coded in specific languages, and to preserve them, Viz has uploaded a lot of shit to Youtube, which…. loses something very real to the story. So if you are gonna lose something, why not also gain something by listening to Lets Read Home//stuck?

(Hilarious aside: I just tried to run [S] Cascade on the official site to grab a screencap and the fucking embed crashed. GOOD JOB VIZ. God.)

Also if you have not experienced LRHS's Rose Lalonde from Act 4 onward, you are missing the fuck out bc that is an oscar-worthy performance of one of the best characters in the story. I'm not kidding.

But it's not complete! I would say LRHS has covered…… over 80% of the story. And they are still actively updating, actually. They fully plan on finishing the comic and I really believe they will do it someday.

Do you have another reason to use LRHS? Yes. The biggest reason:

The trolls.

The trolls are recurring characters. Several are major cast members. They all have Typing Quirks. Some are readable, like Karkat's:

CG: SO I GUESS TODAY IS FINALLY THE DAY YOU FUCK EVERYTHING UP.

Some are...

GC: R34LLY TH3R3S L1K3 TH1S WHOL3 CONSP1R4CY 4BOUT TH1S

I cannot read this shit. When I read HS for the first time, I installed browser extensions to literally remove the quirks. But with LRHS, it's fucking read to you, and by people who know what they're doing.

I cannot recommend LRHS enough. I even have ripped MP3s of the whole thing and its in an audiobook on my phone. Yeah. Yep. That's sure a thing I just admitted to. (If you want 'em lemme know.)

FOUR: I don't want to listen to Whomstve, I want to read it, and I'm upset it's not well preserved.

Someone has Done The Fucking Work of archiving the entirety of Home//stuck.

Two downloads, and you will have a self-contained browser on your computer that will let you read all of it. It's very neat and clean, it has helpful configs to change how the font looks if you have issues reading it (however nothing to remove quirks, sorry) and it maintains the multiple games and special animations in the story.

To use it, you DL the main file, then you DL the asset file. It's easy, it's safe, I have a copy on my computer.

FIVE: Stop with either [S] Act 7 or [S] Credits.

This is a matter of opinion, which ending you prefer. Just, whatever you do, do not:

Read the Epilogues

Play the visual novels

Touch literally anything that says "meat" or "candy"

And that's Whomstve! Hit me up for fic recs when you're done.

SIX: Things to know going in.

Like with all media that was made over a decade ago, some shit has not aged well. There is frequent use of the r-slur, until very suddenly it vanishes from the entire comic because presumably Hussie realized it wasn't a funny word. There are a few characters with uncomfortable racial coding, and one that is literally just an fucking Moonspeak Asian joke. She's a minor character really deep in Act 6, I can tell you how to fully avoid her, just hmu. There is one unfunny use of the term "f*g", but the context is a mitigating factor imo. There is also the trouble of Home//stuck trying hard to be "aracial" as in none of the kids have a canon ethnicity. It's as much of a cop-out as you expect, but its something that imo is heavily explored in the fandom. That doesn't excuse it in the canon though, obviously.

The Ultimate Riddle: Why do you care about Whomstve?

That's difficult to answer.

Let me explain one of my favorite things about it. Maybe that'll help.

In Act 5 Act 2 (yep) there is an animation called [S] Jade: Enter. It comes pretty deep in the story, and if you watched it without any context, it's impenetrable. What the fuck is that dog? What's that door? Why is there a meteor? What is fucking happening?

But if you have read Whomstve up to that point, you reach [S] Jade: Enter, and you are given a fucking clusterfuck of a story beat. There is a moment I fucking shrieked to myself because at that point, I understood the language of HS enough that the Thing that happened was simple, fast, thoughtless, but in that single instant explained everything that had gone wrong up to that point in the story. Suddenly I understood jack everything.

This is Whomstve's midterm exam. It's a story that slowly, lovingly, patiently teaches you an entire language of symbology and mythology and mechanics, all so it can show you a dog and a glowy thing, and it can make you shriek in terror because the ramifications are that. fucking. exquisite.

And then Act 5 ends with [S] Cascade, which is simultaneously your final exam and reward. You have been again slowly, patiently taught what feels like an entire language, and for your time and attention, the story gives you a spectacle that

I literally cannot even put into words for you. If I sat you down and showed you, the uninitiated, [S] Cascade, it would be just visual noise. (Honestly, wanna watch it? Go for it. You will not understand what is happening but the music fucks. Enjoy the spectacle.) But if you reached that point organically, it's a fucking present that genuinely, truly wants to reward you for your effort.

So my point is this: the time put into reading this fucking monstrosity of a story is rewarded in a way that no other piece of media has ever rewarded me. I have never so thoroughly felt like I was being given something by a story as thanks for my time.

Also its funny. Also the art can be incredible. Also the music is NOTHING BUT THE FUCKING HITS. Also the gay delight of Rose and Kanaya's conversations in Act 5 Act 2 is unprecedented. Also when you find out why Karkat is talking to John backwards you're going to die. Also Almost Everyone Is Queer and they are all really complex, deep characters, even many of the ones they tried to just make a joke. Also if you're a good person you deserve to experience [S] Synchronize/Unite. Also the slow slow slow slow fucking burn of the story of Dave Strider will fuck you up. Also Jake English is one of the greatest, most complicated, incredible characters ever rendered in fiction. Also you will want to know what your classpect is.

Also there's a lesbian vampire alien who uses a chainsaw that turns into lipstick when not in use. She hooks up with a snooty, hilarious know it all witch girl who's handle is literally tentacleTherapist. Come on.

Whomstve is good. Give it a shot. I'll have fic for you after you're done.

Wait wait a minute wait, wtf does [S] mean?

Oh. Sound. It means the page has sound. Usually it means there's an animation.

#whomstve #i'm going to bed now #if you try to talk to me about how i just Didn't Get The Epilogues i will block you

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olderthannetfic · 3 years ago

Note

I recently had someone comment on one of my fics that they loved it and have read it like once a month for the past few years. Which wow, what a comment! Except... how was I to know? Before this, they'd left no kudos, no bookmark, no comment. Just a view number. Like, I'm grateful for the comment, but it just blew my mind at the thought that others too might enjoy my writing, but who leave nothing.

And this person, who apparently has been reading this for years, whose account has been in service for years... didn't think to give any signal that they liked it before now. Did they forget? Or is this what the silent hundreds of readers do?

Like, am I insane? Greedy? Writing into a void? Views mean nothing - it could be bot views, after all. Kudos is just a button away, same with bookmarks, comments a few keystrokes (but harder, I get it)... please feed your authors.

I'm yet to reply to them. 'Thank you for finally letting me know' feels a tad facetious 😅

For many readers, their relationship with fic is about them and their feelings about these characters. It might be about their friends they share recs with. Coming back to the author and forming a connection there is a distant concept.

Does it suck for you, the writer? Absolutely! But it's a pretty common mode of interacting with fic all the same.

I found Plaidadder's fic on an old website, and it didn't occur to me to reach out, that I recall. It's only years later that I noticed her on tumblr and mentioned that I've been using those fics to explain the entire concept of fic to people for decades.

Granted, AO3 makes it easier to just leave a quick comment.

So do feed your authors... but also be aware that there are plenty of lurkers who just never thought to comment because that's not how they do things normally.

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storiesforallfandoms · 4 years ago

Text

she ain’t a gold digger ~ machine gun kelly

word count: 2417

request?: yes!

“Hi, please write a MGK imagine where the reader joins him on tour and he loses his wallet and when they decide to go out to a club one night, she asks him to get something from her bag and he sees his wallet in there. He accuses her of stealing and they get into a fight and she storms off. One of the guys confesses that they found it in their suitcase by accident and just slipped it in her purse to keep it safe but forgot to tell him and he apologizes profusely to reader and after some persuasion she forgives him”

description: when his wallet goes missing and he finds it in her bag, he lets the tabloids bullshit get to him and causes a fight he regrets

pairing: machine gun kelly x female!reader

warnings: swearing, angst

masterlist (one, two)

The hotel room was basically overturned when (Y/N) walked in. Colson was tossing things from his suitcase, frantically searching for something.

“We’ve only been here like five minutes, is it really time to pull a full Motley Crue on this room?” she teased.

“I can’t find my wallet,” Colson said, running his hands through his hair in frustration.

“What?”

“It’s not in my suitcase, it’s not in any of my pants - the ones in my suitcase or the ones I’m wearing - it’s not in my carry on or my jacket.”

(Y/N) crossed the room to kneel next to Colson. She put a hand on his shoulder and squeezed reassuringly. In a more calm manner, she looked through the things Colson had messily thrown about the floor. She helped him to look for the millionth time through everything, coming up empty yet again.

“Okay, don’t panic,” she said. “You had it at the airport because it was with your passport. We can call both this airport and the one we just departed from to see if it’s been turned in. In the meantime, we can lock your cards so no one can use them.”

Colson nodded, but (Y/N) could see the panic in his eyes. She cupped his face and made him look up at her. “Hey, it’s okay. We’ll find it, and if we don’t we’ll replace it the best we can.”

~~~~~~

Despite the stress he was still feeling, Colson decided to join (Y/N) and his friends at the club that night. He was glued to his phone the entire ride there, and once they got to the club (Y/N) took it and shoved it into her purse.

“Relax,” she told him. “We’re here to have a good time.”

“But what if someone calls about my wallet?” he asked.

“Then they’ll leave a message. I highly doubt anyone is calling you at almost midnight, though.” (Y/N) laced her fingers through Colson’s and pressed her body against his. “Please baby? For me?”

Colson sighed but (Y/N) could see the smile on his face. “Fine, but you’re paying for my drinks tonight.”

He had to admit the night out was what he needed. Besides the panic over his wallet, Colson had also basically worked himself to death the past few months. Between recording and filming, and now the tour. He was just grateful that his manager allowed (Y/N) to join them on tour. He’d be out of his mind without her.

(Y/N) pushed through the crowd to where Colson and his friends were and passed Colson his drink. He smiled and pulled her down onto his lap. (Y/N) giggled as Colson pressed a kiss onto her neck.

“If you guys are gonna fuck, do us the curtesy of going to the bathroom,” Rook called over the music.

“Please, I’m more classy than that,” Colson responded. “I’d fuck her in the coat closet like a gentleman.”

(Y/N) rolled her eyes and stood. “I’m gonna go dance. Enjoy your boy talk.”

Colson watched the beautiful curved figure of his girlfriend strut to the dancefloor. He finished his drink in one mouthful and went to follow her.

They danced together for so long that Colson had forgotten all of his worried for a brief period of time. He gazed lovingly into the face of the love of his life as she grinded her hips against his. She wrapped her arms around his neck and sheepishly smiled up at him.

“Wanna get out of here?” she whispered seductively in his ear.

“More than anything,” Colson responded. “I’ll get our things. Meet me at the front doors.”

(Y/N) smiled and winked at him as they went their separate ways. Colson pulled out the coat check tickets to get his jacket and (Y/N)’s purse, and passed it to the girl working there. As he shrugged on his jacket, he got the overwhelming urge to check his phone to see if anyone had called about his wallet.

He promised (Y/N) he’d have a good time, but she didn’t have to know he checked. He would just look and see if there were any missed calls then forget until morning.

However, when he opened (Y/N)’s purse to get her phone, he noticed something on the very top: his wallet.

Why does she have my wallet? he thought. And why wouldn’t she tell me that she had it? She knows how worried I’ve been about it.

He tried not to overthink anything before talking to (Y/N) first. He made his way to the front of the club where (Y/N) was waiting with a joint hanging partially out of her mouth. She looked over at him and smiled as a puff of smoke rolled from her lips.

“Are you ready to go?” she asked. When she noticed Colson’s serious look, her smile fell. “Babe, are you okay? Did something happen?”

He found his words stuck in his throat, so instead of speaking he just held his wallet up.

“Holy shit! Is that your wallet?” Colson nodded, still unable to talk. “Where did you find it?!”

“In your purse.”

(Y/N)’s eyebrows furrowed in confusion. “What? How did it get in my purse?”

“I don’t know, you tell me.”

She looked up at him as she took another puff from the joint. “What does that mean?”

“It doesn’t mean anything, I’m just asking a question. This is your purse after all, the only people who touch it are you and me. Obviously I didn’t put the wallet in there so that leaves one person.”

(Y/N) crossed her arms and raised an eyebrow at him. “Say it Colson. Fucking say it.”

“Did you take my wallet (Y/N)?”

“No! Of course I didn’t!”

“Then why is it in your purse?”

(Y/N) rolled her eyes and turned away from Colson. She started to walk away, but he followed her.

“If you took it, I just want to know why,” he said. “I’m not upset, I know there’s likely a good reason for taking it and not telling me.”

“I didn’t fucking take it!” (Y/N) snapped, spinning around to glare at Colson. “I know how this looks, I know it makes no sense, but I fucking swear to you I did not take your fucking wallet. I don’t know how it got in my purse, I don’t know why it’s there, but I did not take your goddamn wallet!”

“Then why the fuck is it in your purse?!”

(Y/N) let out a frustrated groan and buried her head in her hands. “Why can’t you just fucking believe me when I say I didn’t take it? I don’t know how it got in my purse, but I didn’t take it.”

“It just doesn’t make sense to me, (Y/N). How else would it have gotten there? You’re the only one who even touches your purse, none of the guys have had access to it. You knew when and where I had my wallet last, and now it’s showing up in your bag.”

“If I had taken it, why was I trying to help you find it? Why did I tell you to shut down your cards so no one could use them? Why was I helping you to call the airports and turn over the entire hotel room another two times looking for it? Why would I go to those lengths if I just had it instead of telling you just to replace it all?”

“I don’t know, (Y/N), maybe you were just making sure you could get whatever fucking money you could from me without me realizing.”

(Y/N)’s face fell and her eyes started to well with tears. After being together for a year, she thought he would know her better than that. She thought he wouldn’t believe the bullshit tabloid websites were publishing about her being a gold digger and just dating Colson for the money. She thought he would knew she loved him with her entire heart because of who he was, not because he was a famous rapper.

Apparently she was wrong.

Without another word, (Y/N) turned away from him and walked towards the line up of taxis that were waiting outside of the club. Colson watched her go, his anger starting to subside and be replaced by guilt. But he couldn’t go after her, he wouldn’t. He needed some time to think about all of this, to let her think about it as well. Neither one of them were going to get any answers if they kept fighting and hurting one another.

Colson entered the club again, order two more strong drinks and finding his way back to his boys. They all looked at him with confusion as he sat down where he had been before.

“Dude, I thought you left,” Baze said.

“I thought so, too, until I found my wallet in (Y/N)’s purse,” Colson muttered. “We got into a fight and she left.”

“Why were you fighting about that?” Rook asked, his eyebrows furrowing together.

Colson waved off the comment, not feeling in the mood to relay the entire fight back to his friends.

“Wait, did I not tell you I put the wallet there?” Slim asked.

Colson nearly choked on one of his drinks. He coughed and turned to look at his friend. “You fucking had it?”

“Yeah man, it somehow got in my carry on,” Slim responded. “I found it when we were waiting for our luggage. I put it in (Y/N)’s purse cause I knew it would be safe there. I could’ve swore I told you that, though.”

“You didn’t,” Colson said. “God fucking dammit, I’m an idiot.”

“What did you say to her, man?” Baze asked.

“I...I insinuated that she...she’s only with me for my money and she stole my wallet so she could get it.”

The guys chorused disapproving noises at the same time.

“Kells, (Y/N) is literally the realest person I’ve ever met,” Rook said. “She ain’t a gold digger, and you definitely shouldn’t think that she is.”

“I don’t,” Colson sighed. “I was just pissed. God, I’m a fucking idiot.”

“Bro,” Slim said, leaning forward to look at Colson, “go after your woman and apologize.”

Colson nodded and quickly stood from his seat. The cab ride back to the hotel felt incredibly slow. Of course, he had left his phone in (Y/N)’s purse so he couldn’t even call or text her. There was no guarantee that she was even at the hotel, and that thought had Colson’s anxiety so much higher.

He desperately searched his pockets for the hotel key as he approached the room. When he couldn’t find it, he realized it was likely he had left that in (Y/N)’s purse, too. He sighed and began knocking on the door.

“(Y/N)?” he said, his voice soft. “Baby, can you let me in? I think my key is in your purse.” When there was no movement, he added, “I’m so sorry, (Y/N). I should’ve listened to you. Slim admitted to putting my wallet in your bag, turns out he had it all along. I...I should never have thought it was you. I shouldn’t have said what I said. Can...can you let me in, please?”

There was silence. Not even signs of movement. Colson’s heart began to race as he realized the likeliness that (Y/N) had left. He had no idea where she could’ve gone, and now he didn’t even have any way of reaching her.

The door suddenly opened and (Y/N)’s tearstained face looked up at him. She didn’t say anything as she turned away and walked back into the hotel room. Colson followed in silence, unsure of what else to say. He just wanted to hold her and apologize forever, to do anything and everything she wanted to make things better.

(Y/N) got back into bed and laid with her back to Colson. He stood there in the dark, just looking at her.

“(Y/N), I’m sorry,” he said, his voice almost a whisper.

“You called me a gold digger,” (Y/N) responded, her voice equally as small. “After almost a year together, you called me a fucking gold digger.”

“I know - ”

“We’ve talked about how much those tabloid stories get to me, how upset they make me, and you really had the audacity to bring that up and not believe me when I said that I didn’t take your wallet.”

The fact that her voice wasn’t angry, but rather sad, made everything so much worse. Colson winced at her words, feeling a lump form in his throat.

“I know,” he repeated. “I don’t know why I said any of that. I didn’t mean it, I know you love me. I just...I have no excuses. I am a total fucking idiot and you have every right to be angry with me. I know I’m sorry won’t cut it, but for now that’s all I can say. I really am sorry.”

There was another prolonged silence. (Y/N) didn’t even move from her place on the bed. Colson had accepted the fact that she probably hated him and was preparing to go stay with one of the guys for the night, when he heard the bed shift and (Y/N)’s soft voice ask, “Did the guys give you shit?”

Colson smiled to himself. “Yeah, they did. They called me an idiot.”

“You are one.”

“I know.”

Through the darkness of the room, Colson could see (Y/N) lift the blankets and gesture for him to join her. He quickly kicked off his shoes and threw his jacket somewhere on the floor. The minute his body connected with hers, he felt relief wash over him. He hugged her tightly, never wanting to let her go.

“I love you,” he whispered, kissing the top of her head and repeating the sentiment over and over.

“And I love you, as in you - Colson Baker. Not Machine Gun Kelly, not the man with the money. I love the real you.”

“I know you do. I promise I’ll never doubt that again baby.”

(Y/N) relaxed into Colson’s arms, still a bit hurt from what he had said but happy to have him there with her. Finally, after some time, the two drifted off to sleep.

#machine gun kelly #machine gun kelly imagine #machine gun kelly x reader #colson baker #colson baker imagine #colson baker x reader #mgk #imagine #one shot #request #fanfiction #fanfic #fandom

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