#i mean it practically already is there isn't enough time in oct to do all of the spooky shit u wanted

[tiikerikani]

Stop what you're doing and go to the book launch

2024 Oct 10 – Bar Loose, Helsinki

Honestly, this was better than them having a thing at book fair (best fair), because more of the band can show up and the extremely short notice meant that the audience would be a manageable size.

The only fans who queued outside before they let us in to the bar were people like me, Tall Blonde (whose arm was in a cast), Regular Groupie (coming in from whatever part of the country she actually lives in — the real "stop what you're doing" groupie energy), and the wheelchair-bound woman (and her husband) who's always at the accessible gigs here. People gradually showed up as they got off from work.

Appropriately the bar had the (presumably) Spotify playlist with their songs on, and I was trying really hard not to sing along too dramatically...yet ;) Drinks were happy hour prices too. Senpai allowed himself a couple of beers, maybe because this is more of a speaking engagement even though they were to perform a few songs.

Insert usual book talk content

The book is in fact also a ribbon campaign product (despite no pink), hence releasing on the same day their participation was announced. This just means that 1€ goes to charity for each copy sold except the preorders...

Teemu is wearing The Pendant with another ring on the cord.

One thing the author found remarkable (and possibly quite unique) about the band is really just how incredibly wholesome they are, and not just how they're always in neat, tailored outfits. We usually associate rock bands with personality clashes, drama, on-stage fights, and other petty behavior — in whose story this band completely lacks, despite how large and diverse the ensemble is. They all get along and nobody resents being there, and they have democratic principles and expectations of conduct that they are committed to.

I mean just look how much fun they're genuinely having, especially the fellas without their instruments. (Couldn't resist singing a tiny bit.)

The song is kind of forever associated with that time I went to Köyliö and had cried to it traveling to Turku and back and eating too much Hesburger.

Then they played Onnellinen mies which I didn't film because they always invite everybody to sing along and I do.

Naturally people wanted another song. "We could play what we always play? We already played it downstairs [for warmup] but we could play it again." (So that's the secret, if you don't hear it in a set, which is only when they don't have a lot of time, they will have played it amongst themselves.)

I only filmed from the second verse onwards because I noticed they were doing something really nice with the harmonies in the chorus and I… kind of want to steal it?? Maybe it's my pianist bias but it just isn't quite the same without the piano part.

(nooo he threw me off by not taking the full 8 beats before the last line)

For the rest of the evening they let people have books (and stuff) signed. I had brought my copy so I could ask Senpai to write a message in it. It's not quite as personalized as it was last time but that's okay. I told the author that he didn't need to translate his note for me (I know enough Savonians), but he gave it his best shot anyway 😅

Merch Table Guy (who'd proofread the manuscript) had this demo CD (and some stickers) from Senpai's previous band. He also has albums from other band members' other/previous projects. I think he must either have been a fan from the very start or just enjoys tracking down this sort of thing on Discogs, or both.

But yeah! That's what he looked like in his pre-beard (pre-singer) incarnation 😂

I let the autograph table have a look at the miniature of myself with the book. ("Painting these figures is kind of my main hobby right now, my other important hobby is skipping choir practice to see you guys." —no really this has happened too much.)

The Spotify playlist had resumed and the bands playing later in the evening in the club downstairs had started setting up. Minne sinä meet came on and I'd had a couple of drinks so I gave it my 100% voice. (But not within earshot of the band. Should I have?) You, dear reader, know how much the song means to me, but nobody in the room knows that.

But a couple more words before I go

— You know, I've been having a rough week, and I really... — I hope this helped a bit? — It's exactly what I needed.

[Concert write-up archive and master calendar]

[nancychi]

oct 29

i've been questioning my faith a lot.

The past couple of years have been a whirlwind of everything and nothing. My mind has been trying to process it all but I guess when I try to put it into words it doesn't know how to properly process it. Blogging has always been my gateway of figuring out why I feel a certain way, but i've halted it since probably 2017. & honestly, since then I don't really know what happened in my life. I'm not sure if I use to write more for myself or for my readers. In a way, knowing that other people are reading what i'm trying to process gave me a sense of purpose... cause I mean common, my brain already is thinking everything that i'm trying to put down into words. So maybe my goal will be to get back on here. I don't even know how to write anymore. My grammar probably sucks, and my spelling? Don't even be surprised. I write like I talk. And the way that I talk isn't much more sophisticated in any way. It's simple - and my brain can't seem to learn anything new. I'm currently 33.

In many ways, when I reflect on my life right now, it's ideally good. I have both my parents alive and well. My immediate family members are generally living with everything we can ask for. Money, cars, families, comfort, health and whatever the world thinks is the meaning of success. As for me, I have the most ideal life that I can ask for. I work probably 20 hours a week on a "busy week," make way more than I ever thought i'd make, can eat whatever I want and work out everyday. I have all the time in the world to watch tv, hang out with my friends, travel practically whenever I want. My biggest worries currently are probably thinking that I can never afford a house in San Diego, getting audited, my business taking a bajillion years to open, and of course not being married and having kids, or even being close to it. Which, I guess can seem pretty tragic to some people LOL. But, maybe i've convinced myself that I have enough that those things are just secondary.

In all this, i've been a been weary. Maybe being by myself more recently has reminded me of how lonely this life can be. Even though I am surrounded by all the greatest people, I at times still feel so alone. This I know is rooted in not being close to God. I remember specifically the moments I fell in love with Jesus. When I felt like nothing in the world or the universe can tear me away from. Throw me on an island I would say, and all will be well. He was actually living in me and alive within me. I heard his voice so clearly. My heart and soul felt fulfilled and satisfied in whatever situation I was in.

But now. Now I feel like an empty shell. I first felt this when I questioned if the Spirit was still in me. I then began to notice myself questioning things of the bible. Truths that I use to hold so dear and close to my heart, I began to find myself doubting. I also found myself minimizing the gravity of whatever the gospel was saying. & this scares me. Which is so ironic... cause I probably feel scared and want to cling on because I do have the spirit inside me right? RIGHT?

I've also recently started going to a new church. Kairos. It's everything that i've been looking for in a church. A smallish but big enough church where missions is a priority, prayer is being practiced, community isn't just a weekly food gathering and the leadership seems so in tune with the Spirit. BUT it's been wrecking me a little. This past week I went to a bible study for young adults. Going to these groups have truly humbled me. like.... did everyone go to seminary? Everyone seems so genuinely in Love with God. They all seem very grown in their walks as well. Like what, where are all the people that need to be reminded who Jesus is? Where are all the "Sunday church goers?"

ANYWAY, all this to say... we were reading Hebrews and in Ch 4 it talks about people that are being fed milk and solid food. And i felt like i've been drinking milk the past 7 years. I Also realized... in that same chapter that I don't think I knew the difference between Good and Evil anymore. My lines have been so blurred that I don't know what change in my life would look like if I were to be close to God. SO, this week I am going to challenge myself to pray more and really dig into the word again. I want to be changed. I want to be renewed. I want to have confidence when Jesus asks me who I am at the gates of heaven.

SO here I am... trying to make sense of myself and my faith. Praying for miracles in my life. Transformations in my heart. May my life look significantly different in a week, month, a year because of Jesus.

[coolspacequips]

Welp I chose between RP and solo tonight lol

RIP to Lance in my new vampire klance RP, what could be a more jarring sight than watching ur stubborn ass roommate waste away for a week only to find him puking up A LOT of blood in the middle of the night??