#i mean apart from on twitter i haven't seen any like ugly bitterness about this yet

[thank-your-lucky-stars]

i know how much robron being legally married meant to you (and others) and i just want to say i really like how positive your being even tho your disapointed! i was feeling a bit down about it but ppl being so positive has really helped me (: so thanks !

Oh bless you anon, this is so sweet!

I think it’s totally normal to be disappointed about something like this, but I think it’s sort of whether we chose to focus on this one thing we’re disappointed about, vs all the things we have to be excited about?

Like you’re right, them being legally married is something that is personally important to me for a number of reasons. And I’ll admit my tummy sort of flopped when I read the ceremony isn’t legal.

My disappointment is real and valid because we were sort of led to believe that it was going to be official (even if it didn’t seem realistic - more on that later!)

HOWEVER!!!!

We don’t know all the ins and outs yet. Hopefully more will be revealed on Sunday, or we’ll at least know more on Monday/Tuesday. Maybe there’s some way they will be able to make it legal before Aaron gets sentenced (I doubt it but I also don’t understand how it all works tbh!), or if not, hopefully they will address that it’ll be made legal as soon as Aaron is released (and like I said in another post, I literally don’t care if a big deal is made of it or not (obviously I’d like a big deal to be made lmao but it’s not something I *need*) - they can literally just arrive home one day and be like “btw we signed the papers today, we’re officially married!” and I’d be happy with that tbh!)

The reason I’d like it to be legal is because I want them to be Official Husbands™ lmao, I want if one of them is in hospital or arrested (lmao) or whatever, I want the Important People™ to address them as husbands; “Robert, your husband has been taken to hospital” etc. etc. - I’m just a sucker for stuff like that. 

But there are SO many benefits to being legally wed, which is why people fought so hard for same sex marriage to be legal in the first place, because you get rights being someone’s spouse that you don’t get if you’re “just” a partner (which is.....not right IMO, but that’s the way it is). Like if one of them was really sick, I’d like the other to be the first person notified, to be the person to make the important decisions.

I just love the idea of them being legally bound, so the next time they have a silly argument and threaten to split, it’s like “HAHA it’s not that easy, you’re tied together now!!” LOL 

But honestly....that’s just *why* I want them to be legally married. 

HOWEVER.

None of this takes anything away from what we will see next week. It is all still just as real and valid. I think some people are sort of mixing up peoples disappointment and reading it as them not seeing the day as “real”. And maybe some people don’t, maybe some people do see it as “fake”.

But I don’t.

Just because they’re not legally getting married Monday/Tuesday, it doesn’t mean it isn’t *real*.

Yes, the legal stuff is important, but it’s not everything.

And that’s what I’m focusing on; I’m focusing on everything else.

The fact that we will see our boys pledge their love and commitment to each other in front of their family and friends!

The fact that we will hear them make VOWS!!!!!! And we know they’re going to get choked up!!!

The fact that, at least now we know the wedding isn’t legal, we don’t have to worry about it not happening, or not being “completed”, or them not reaching “I do”. Because that’s what I was worried about, that they wouldn’t actually complete the wedding/be husbands at the end of it.

But that is sort of invalid now, because in this instance, it’s all about the vows. The legal/technical stuff will have to wait for another day.

And we KNOW they say their vows so....it’s all good?!?? 

So even though I’m disappointed it won’t be legal right now, there are also lots of pluses to it not being legal at the moment.

There’s the reason I just mentioned (the will they/won’t they aspect is gone), and there’s also the fact that it’s realistic?!? Because anyone who has gotten married will know you can’t just knock up a wedding overnight and have it all be legit. (I didn’t actually know this, so I’d have been none the wiser if it wasn’t for people pointing it out).

I half expected ED to magic up some new rules, or come up with a new explanation for it being legal, but I know people would’ve complained about this. So at least doing it this way, it’s realistic.

And at the end of the day, in this moment, the technical stuff can wait. Yes, it would’ve been ideal if it could all be done and dusted there and then, but what really matters is the boys, is Robert reassuring Aaron of his love and devotion and commitment, of giving Aaron the perfect send-off.

It’s a wedding in every sense of the word, and in every way that truly matters for that moment.

So, in a nutshell; yeah, I am genuinely disappointed that this won’t be a legal wedding. But any disappointment I feel is outweighed by the fact that, at the end of the day, OUR BOYS ARE STILL GETTING MARRIED?!?!?!?!

So it’s like....10% disappointment, 90% pure JOY and excitement!

Like we have SO much to look forward to be a be positive about, and I’m not going to focus too much on this one little technicality which will, fingers crossed, hopefully be addressed and ironed out soon enough anyway.

And potentially, it not being legal now could hopefully give us something to look forward to in the future?! Like if/when they do make it official (and honestly, I really really really hope they do, for the reasons stated at the start of this post), hopefully they can have another little gathering afterwards and maybe Adam could even make a best mans speech then :D

So I just really hope that everyone who is disappointed (and honestly, you have every right to be) just....keeps doing what I’m doing (and what others are doing too!) and just focus on all the good stuff instead! :)