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oceanicwriting · 2 days ago

Text

drink.

summary: for months theodore nott has been waking up on the shores of the black lake, disoriented and unable to remember how he got there. you thought he would never discover your secret, but one night everything changes irreparably and secrets of darkness meet the light of his eyes.

pairing(s): theodore nott x vampire!fem!reader

a/n: this story has a lot of context! i got really inspired in the first half because i love the whole vampire-obsessed-with-theodore-nott thing and i couldn't help myself hehe. i hope you like it. any phrase in cursive without dash are theodore's thoughts.

+18 smut, mention of blood, violence, public sex, blow job, standing, missionary, masturbation (mostly m!receiving), cursing

ㅤㅤㅤ if you had to describe theodore nott in one word, that would be perfect. his features that resemble those of a greek god are overwhelming, making you lose any sense of reason when he is paralyzed in front of you. anyone would believe that this is the interest of any human about him, but you are a nocturnal monster, and there were other things that interested you more.

ㅤㅤㅤ you breathe heavily, feeling the liquid you suck being transported to every part of your insatiable body. your head is spinning from the sensation that silences the hunger you had controlled during the week, weakening your power over his dormant mind. some lucid part of your brain forces you to separate, disappearing into the shadow of the trees and cleaning the remains of blood that have fallen on your chin.

ㅤㅤㅤ from your position, you can see how the strong frost hits the boy's bare chest, messing up his hair and tensing every exposed muscle. his lips have turned purple from the lack of a coat, the same color that the tips of his fingers and his bare knees adopt. maybe you should have dressed him before taking him there.

ㅤㅤㅤ where am i? what...? you try to keep listening to his thoughts, but it is a practice that you do not master and you can not hear beyond that. what you have no doubt about is the labored breathing you hear from your spot, accompanied by the accelerated gallop of his heartbeat and moans of pain originating in his arm. the simple smell of his blood turns your stomach upside-down.

ㅤㅤㅤ when he has gotten up, he steps on the mud, careful not to slip. his blue gaze scans everything around him, but nothing catches his attention, setting off for the comfort of the castle.

ㅤㅤㅤ as he disappear among the dark shadows of the night, you let your body fall against the ground, savoring the metallic taste that his blood always leaves in your mouth. that begins to feed the hunger that accumulates at the bottom of your stomach, and all that remains is to wait for your human characteristics to return back to normal.

ㅤㅤㅤ —theodore is fucking a hogsmade vampire. —draco malfoy’s voice, one of your most frequent food friends, rises over the professor’s voice—. and he doesn’t want to tell any details.

ㅤㅤㅤ your heart starts to pound in panic, going over the past few weeks and all the ones before, assuring to your anxiety that you always did everything perfectly. if he knows something, it's because someone else told him, but who would? no one has seen you or even listened.

ㅤㅤㅤ —why should i tell you? —theodore replies. his voice comes out much louder, as if you have a filter to hear him more clearly than anyone else—. do you guys need stories to jerk off to when you’re alone? because of course i’m fucking a vampire.

ㅤㅤㅤ you frown, knowing he was lying. any bad liar would start to show a racing pulse, and you could hear his without a problem.

ㅤㅤㅤ —look —he says, forcing you to turn over your shoulder to see how he shows the mark of your fangs on his forearm—. what else could it be?

ㅤㅤㅤ you try to read his thoughts. however, you can’t. his body language shows that he is as confused as he is fascinated by the unmistakable mark of a vampire on his pale skin. his friends are shocked by the revelation and make dirty jokes about theodore’s fake sexual experiences. so stupid.

ㅤㅤㅤ —and what is his name?

ㅤㅤㅤ theodore, turning his head to look at his friends, locks eyes with you. so cute and naive.

ㅤㅤㅤ —you will never know.

ㅤㅤㅤ and neither do you, you think.

ㅤㅤㅤ your vampire lineage dates back thousands of years, being one of the most famous and well-known in the entire magical world. although no one really knows your true nature, because your father was banned from all stories, diaries, or writings after falling hopelessly in love with a human witch. before turning her into one like him, wanting to leave the decision of being a full vampire to his children, they had four beautiful half-vampire creatures.

ㅤㅤㅤ beings of your kind have always been classified as an inferior race to full vampires, but your father had taken it upon himself to teach you how to handle your abilities since you were little. of course, you weren't as good as him, who at your age could read the thoughts of any living being, change shape, manipulate minds, and more.

ㅤㅤㅤ —hey, where are you going?

ㅤㅤㅤ you turn, watching your roommate light the candle on her nightstand. you clap loudly, drawing his attention and, in the blink of an eye, your eyes turn bright red like a ruby.

ㅤㅤㅤ —you think you saw me, but you didn’t. now you’re going to go get a glass of water from the bathroom, go back to bed, and sleep until the next morning —you say, your demanding voice clashing with every part of the room.

ㅤㅤㅤ whenever your skill accomplished its goal, you felt a tingle at the tip of your fingers, and this time was no exception.

ㅤㅤㅤ when you reach theodore’s room, and even meters before you arrive, you can feel the calm beat of his heart. it’s so slow that you can’t help the smile that appears on your lips as you imagine him sleeping so peacefully. you close your eyes and focus your energy on awakening his mind, but not his dream.

ㅤㅤㅤ —come to me.

ㅤㅤㅤ in less than a second the door emits a soft click that reveals the tall figure of the boy. you don't have time to stop and contemplate him, controlling his walk to the exit and looking over your shoulder every now and then.

ㅤㅤㅤ arriving at the foot of the black lake, protected by the full moon night, you stop to look at theodore nott. his pale skin shining against the reflection of the stars in the water, messy hair that moves with the wind, a slightly swollen face and eyelashes resting on the highest points of his defined cheekbones. he looked so appetizing that the idea of drinking all his blood was tempting.

ㅤㅤㅤ you force him to lie down on a thin layer of grass, and you settle with your legs on either side of his waist. you take two deep breaths, feeling your fangs lengthen to bury themselves in the same wound as always. the delight of his blood filling your mouth makes you close your eyes to fully enjoy his refined taste. you were so enraptured by the sensations of his blood in your mouth that you can't understand how theodore wakes up and pushes you against the ground.

ㅤㅤㅤ —don't move. —you look at him, feeling his body imprison yours and gently push a wooden stake into your chest—. you...? what the fuck?

ㅤㅤㅤ although his frown shows how angry he is, his pulse only indicates that he is as scared as you are dismayed.

ㅤㅤㅤ —theo... —you try to deny what he has seen, but the drop of blood running down your cheek was as real as the color of your reddened gaze.

ㅤㅤㅤ —since when do you do this? —he asks. you try to answer, but the scent of his blood only awakens an animal that theodore would never be able to control—. answer me.

ㅤㅤㅤ you could have gotten into his mind to force him to sleep in less than a second, but there was a mystical force that prevented you from getting back into his head.

ㅤㅤㅤ —i’m sorry. i’m so sorry.

ㅤㅤㅤ you can hear theodore’s heart skip a couple of beats, taking advantage of that moment of doubt to hit the stake and push him. your hands intertwine to form a fist that hits the back of the boy’s neck, who falls unconscious at your feet. now, what would you do?

ㅤㅤㅤ since that night, you haven't been able to stop thinking about theodore. he had found a way to break your power with an enchanted stone hidden in the pocket of his pajama shorts. your father would have told you that you should look for another food to prevent something like that from happening again. however, forgetting the brown-haired boy's blood was an impossible task.

ㅤㅤㅤ during the two weeks that you were away, drinking animal blood at night, theodore hadn't said anything. you had seen each other in classes, meals, the common room, and the library, but he didn't seem to register you beyond the normal. will he not question you again?

ㅤㅤㅤ it's likely that if you had listened to your father's inner voice instead of your starving heart you wouldn't be battling with the shadow of the boy who had just poisoned you with a garlic potion. yes, you went to look for him once again. and yes, theodore nott had just made you fall unconscious in front of him.

ㅤㅤㅤ when you wake up, the first thing you feel is a cold breeze hitting your face. your limbs still feel paralyzed by the effect of the potion, disappearing minutes later.

ㅤㅤㅤ —it took you a while to come back. —it's his voice, strong and clear. as you sit up, you can see him with the stake pointing straight at your heart and another swig of potion in his free hand—. i even thought you had gotten bored. i don't want you to move, okay? i have no intentions of killing you, if that worries you.

ㅤㅤㅤ you knew he wouldn't do it because of his weak grip on the stake. didn't he know you could stand up, take the wood from his hands, and kill him to avoid trouble? you had a thousand ideas of how to do that, but you don't move.

ㅤㅤㅤ —at least, not if you don't give me reasons.

ㅤㅤㅤ does that sound intimidating enough? you look at him, noticing that he hadn’t said anything else since his last sentence. were you perhaps listening to his thoughts?

ㅤㅤㅤ —doesn’t this look familiar to you? —he asks, circling you as if you were the one with the lowest chance of survival—. sure, you’re a lot more subtle about getting me here, but i still haven’t mastered the psychic techniques of magic.

ㅤㅤㅤ you were hungry. you were so eager to taste some blood that hearing theodore’s veins pump makes your head hurt. if there was a quick way to end all this to feed yourself, you would do it.

ㅤㅤㅤ —you want to know what happened, right? —he shows a small ring on his finger—. i have to assume, because you didn’t take it from me last time, that you don’t know a memory stone when you see one. even though you took away the one that prevented you from entering my mind, you didn't realize that i had this one right here.

ㅤㅤㅤ it was such a small stone that it seemed incredible to you how images could be reproduced there. theodore didn't remember it, but that small transparent stone had everything that had happened that night printed on it, and those marks on his arm were enough proof to understand the whole situation.

ㅤㅤㅤ you wish you had something to say, but you had your mouth completely closed for fear of saying the wrong thing. you search for something that can calm your anguish, and when you hear his heart pumping calmly, something lights up inside you.

ㅤㅤㅤ —why my blood?

ㅤㅤㅤ you weren't going to lie. you could do it and find a way to escape, but the bravery of facing you with such serenity dangerously attracts you to him.

ㅤㅤㅤ —your blood is... delicious. you have disgusting habits, smoking and drinking every weekend don't do your body any good. but that liquid is always as intact as can be.

ㅤㅤㅤ she's cute.

ㅤㅤㅤ —have you done this to anyone else?

ㅤㅤㅤ you can notice that his grip on the stake is weakening a little and you take the opportunity to get up, making the boy alert. your body moves on its own, now understanding what had just awakened inside you. ㅤㅤ

ㅤㅤㅤ —why do you ask? jealous? —you ask, laughing softly. his laugh is precious too—. after all, it seems that nott is the only one in hogwarts who is fucking a hogsmade vampire.

ㅤㅤㅤ all the sounds that reach your ears fade into the background when you hear his heartbeat again. hunger has begun to ache throughout your body, and you could assure that you would become a monster if you did not feed yourself right then and there.

ㅤㅤㅤ —did you hear that...

ㅤㅤㅤ —i have other powers, besides manipulating people. —you take his hand, effortlessly lowering the stake. you could hear the string of thoughts exploding in his head so clearly that it was impossible not to smile—. there is no one in this place with the blood i want. maybe that's why i drink yours or...

ㅤㅤㅤ theodore had heard all kinds of stories about vampires. he knew they were ruthless, callous, and murderous beings of darkness. he knew they would use any means to achieve their goal, but when he sees you, he can't make that connection. how can such a beauty be so bad?

ㅤㅤㅤ —have you ever thought that i might like you? —you say, looking at him tenderly and caressing his arm—. what should i do to get you to let me drink you, theodore?

ㅤㅤㅤ nothing. fuck me. no, that would be too much to ask. his thoughts are heard loud and clear, making your skin crawl from the mixture they have with his lust-tinged eyes. at that moment, you can hear his heart beat faster, pumping blood to hidden parts of his body and feeding your desire to drink.

ㅤㅤㅤ —do you want to drink my blood?

ㅤㅤㅤ the question has you nodding frantically, lighting a fire that’s stoked by those sea-blue eyes. that’s so hot.

ㅤㅤㅤ —maybe we can make a deal —you say, squeezing his arm and forcing him to crash into a tree—. you let me feed whenever i wants and you... you can brag about how you’re sleeping with a vampire. and this time, you wouldn’t be lying like a brazen man.

ㅤㅤㅤ theodore grabs your neck, twisting to slam your back against the tree with a force that makes you gasp. you hadn’t seen that coming.

ㅤㅤㅤ —you think it’s that easy?

ㅤㅤㅤ you laugh, running your hands down his chest and saying—: i can smell your desire. you don’t have to play hard to get with me.

ㅤㅤㅤ theodore breathes heavily, and you can hear the blood running through his jugular, throbbing. can she really? you know his brain is filled with questions, fear, and a desire that builds up in his member. you had to play along.

ㅤㅤㅤ —come on. aren't you a little curious about what a vampire can do in sex?

ㅤㅤㅤ yeah, of course i'm. theodore can't say anything, because his thoughts are taking over his answers.

ㅤㅤㅤ —are you afraid to find out? —your hands travel to his pants, unbuttoning them and letting them fall—. tell me, theodore, do you want to try what a vampire really does?

ㅤㅤㅤ —isn't that obvious? —he answers scathingly, smiling so close to your face that your hands must cup his cheeks—. why do you keep playing if you know the answer?

ㅤㅤㅤ his lips stick to yours as if they had waited their whole lives to touch you. both of you felt so desperate, needy, and eager that it was impossible not to battle back and forth. so sweet that it's impressive. a smile slides down your face, tasting the exquisiteness of his mouth with such impatience that theodore must calm his own internal fire.

ㅤㅤㅤ you pull away, noticing theodore is pushing himself to reach you, but you cover his mouth. your hands descend with you from his shoulders to his waist, looking into his eyes from your new kneeling position. one of his large hands caresses your face roughly, pressing one of his fingers to your lips. shit.

ㅤㅤㅤ —you're so fucking hot.

ㅤㅤㅤ your hands pull down his underwear, stealing a heavy sigh from you as you realize how big and thick he is. one of your hands grabs his cock to hold it in front of your mouth, being embraced by your hot tongue that elicits a hoarse growl from the boy. then you begin to put him in your mouth slowly, unable to take it all and having to use your hand to cover what's missing.

ㅤㅤㅤ at first, you have a hard time adjusting to the feeling of his thick member scraping against the walls of your mouth, but when you begin to take it in slow and easy, everything becomes simpler.

ㅤㅤㅤ fuck, so soft. theodore rests his hand on the tree, enjoying the way your mouth sucks and kisses his cock. he was fascinated with the way your tongue moved over his member when it was buried deep in you mouth. he liked the way your hand moved when your lips weren’t hugging it. what he adored the most, always stealing a soft moan from him, was when you watched him while licking his glans with a devilish eroticism

ㅤㅤㅤ —so good —you say, choking soon after when you take his cock again.

ㅤㅤㅤ this time, your mouth moves quickly, listening to theodore sigh, moan, and grunt. your tongue works magic to embrace his length as best it can, bringing a perfect movement that not only causes shameless sounds in him but in you.

ㅤㅤㅤ —ah... so perfect. s-so cute. —theodore's hand caresses your face that moves against him—. i won't feel bad at all for doing this to you.

ㅤㅤㅤ then his hand tangles in your hair, holding your head to begin thrusting his hips. the simple collision of the tip of his hardened cock with your throat makes your eyes fill with tears, gasping and losing balance.

ㅤㅤㅤ you had to admit that the way he sinks, deeper and faster, was exciting. your hands must tighten on his legs to support the back and forth that theodore has established. he moves with incredible dominance, trembling with pleasure and rumbling from the heat of your mouth.

ㅤㅤㅤ —just like that. a-a little more. you're doing so well.

ㅤㅤㅤ it's pathetic to think that hearing him speak turns you on, but it does and you strive to help his pleasure by using your hand at the base of his cock. so close. theodore sighs, then you feel it, a tremor that mixes with your cry muffled by the semen that hits your walls.

ㅤㅤㅤ theodore tries to get out of your mouth, but your hands hold him still, unloading all his semen inside your mouth. the smile that draws on his face is so magnificent that it lightens a little the suffocation that the viscous substance causes.

ㅤㅤㅤ —you taste good —you whisper, getting up from the floor.

ㅤㅤㅤ —i bet you're not just talking about my semen.

ㅤㅤㅤ a mischievous smile escapes your lips and you feel the boy's hands tighten on your hip. he looked so cute after the orgasm as if a glow had passed over his face to highlight every bit of his beauty.

ㅤㅤㅤ —when are you going to fuck me? —you ask, gently removing his clothes from his torso—. i want you to fuck me. i want you to sink into me, theodore. i can’t wait any longer.

ㅤㅤㅤ it’s a request he doesn’t plan to refuse, rushing his hands to grab the articles of clothing you wear in between kisses filled with laughter. not before long you’re half-dressed, pressed against the tree and burning to be touched. it’s so perfect that it hurts.

ㅤㅤㅤ —have you ever fucked a vampire? —you ask, over the soft movement of his lips against yours.

ㅤㅤㅤ —you’ll be my first —he answers with a smile that widens when you jump to wrap your legs around his waist, feeling his member getting harder between you—. proud of that?

ㅤㅤㅤ you nod, moving your hips against him.

ㅤㅤㅤ —you have no idea.

ㅤㅤㅤ you could get addicted to the way he kisses you. he had this thing about biting your lips just enough to pull you against him. yes, you wanted to kiss him every day, just as much as you wanted to feed off of him.

ㅤㅤㅤ theodore adjusts himself to support your weight on his arms and lowers his free hand to the growing wetness of your panties. so perfect, wet and ready for anything.

ㅤㅤㅤ —i need to be inside you —he whispers, his voice heavy with desire. he drops one of your legs onto the floor—. now.

ㅤㅤㅤ a stifled gasp escapes your lips when you hear the sound of your underwear tearing into a simple rag that falls to the floor. your hands tangle in his hair, as he adjusts himself to push the tip of his cock against your tight entrance without warning. it’s so slow and perfect that it feels like pleasurable torture.

ㅤㅤㅤ —ah, theo —you sigh, pulling at the end of his hair at the pain that crosses the line into pleasure soon after.

ㅤㅤㅤ —just a little, angel. r-relax a little more.

ㅤㅤㅤ it feels so good. the last portion of his member pushes inside you with a searing, arousing heat that travels throughout your throbbing body. he was so big that you can feel your muscles contract. then, theodore begins to move with soft shallow thrusts that tickle throughout your body.

ㅤㅤㅤ when his movements have sped up, making you whimper because of the wood scraping your back and the crash of his pelvis against you, a deadly sensation runs through you. deeper, harder, needy, and hungry. all that and the mixture of your juices has created a constant sound that clouds your senses.

ㅤㅤㅤ there are so many stimuli that it is impossible not to enjoy it. constant blows from the boy, wind crashing against your nakedness, heart beating desperately and sexual sound of his member pushing to the possible limit. how could all this be more perfect?

ㅤㅤㅤ —theo, m-more.

ㅤㅤㅤ he looks at you, capturing your lips, while his free hand goes down to your clitoris. at the slightest contact of his cold fingers, massaging and pressing, you feel a wave that tickles to the depths of your being. the moans that merge with the contact of his lips is so pleasurable for theodore that he can feel his cock tremble. it can't be now, it can't be so fast.

ㅤㅤㅤ theodore grabs your leg, still moving, this time more gently. you smile, playing with his hair as he lifts and lays you down on the wet grass.

ㅤㅤㅤ —you look gorgeous.

ㅤㅤㅤ and mouthwatering. the thought manages to get stuck at the back of your mind, igniting something much stronger than your pleasure. it was hunger. a desire to bury your teeth in the throbbing vein of his neck and drain every last drop of his blood takes over you. you pull his arm, pressing your lips together until a small wound brings blood to your mouth.

ㅤㅤㅤ —i can't take it anymore. theodore, please —you plead, him tasting his own red liquid as he sucks the pain from his lip. you feel the little drop change everything inside you, and you can see theodore's gaze widen—. p-please.

ㅤㅤㅤ for fuck's sake, she'll be the end of me. his lips trail down your chest, beginning to move his hips again and chuckling softly at the way your chest bounces.

ㅤㅤㅤ —why the rush? are you that hungry, little vampire?

ㅤㅤㅤ the repeated movement of his hips colliding with yours quickens your breathing, and you gasp at theodore's wet attack on your chest.

ㅤㅤㅤ —just keep waiting for your prize.

ㅤㅤㅤ you look at him, knowing he means to drink his blood, but your fangs had already grown seconds ago.

ㅤㅤㅤ —who said i was going to keep waiting?

ㅤㅤㅤ damn. theodore moans at the pain of your teeth, piercing his flesh, feeling the blood gush into your mouth from the way you suck effortlessly. the mere taste makes your eyes turn bright red, and you can hear the boy's breath hitch. for a moment, he's completely still, panting, but soon he moves carefully again.

ㅤㅤㅤ the sensations mix inside you in a hellish way. his deep thrusts have intensified their power inside you from the pleasure of his blood running down your throat and the boy's soft moans. that mix was enough to clench your muscles tightly.

ㅤㅤㅤ —so pretty.

ㅤㅤㅤ your legs hug his hips, helping you find his rhythm in the air. theodore moans at the feeling of your mouth drinking, while your interior embraces his cock tighter and tighter. and it happens. you feel it like a wave charged with joy, but when he touches that same spot again, it is impossible to control the cry that arches your back.

ㅤㅤㅤ —r-right there. that's it... —he doesn't waste time pushing himself once more to that same spot as if he knew exactly what to do to touch it.

ㅤㅤㅤ what a sight. you try to take his arm again in the middle of your muffled moans, but theodore doesn't allow it. his mouth curves into a smile that you can't enjoy too much because his lips find yours in a messy kiss, panting and full of a lust that neither of you had felt. when he pulls away, he tastes his own blood as if he can understand what it does to your wet core.

ㅤㅤㅤ —shit...

ㅤㅤㅤ and it's enough because your entire body convulses under his power, while theodore moves about two more times to leave a line of semen on your abdomen. you both look at each other, catching your breath before you can feel his blood hit your nose.

ㅤㅤㅤ —i need to feed —you say, stopping your instincts from taking over—. please.

ㅤㅤㅤ theodore drops down beside you and extends his arm, giving you free rein to drink as much as you want. the thing is that you now found something even more addictive than his blood and you don't know what will happen with it.

#theodore nott #theodore nott x y/n #theodore nott x you #theodore nott x reader #theo nott #theo nott x y/n #theo nott x you #theo nott x reader #theodore nott smut #theo nott smut #theodore nott scenarios #slytherin #slytherin boys #wizarding world #harry potter #oceanic fav ૮꒰ ˶• ༝ •˶꒱ა ♡

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vmlnrzmp4 · 20 hours ago

Text

nsfw

cw: reader's first time going full way, 3 different positions, porn w plot, no use of condom(don't be silly, wrap the willy.) a/n: i usually don't give cw, trying to keep the smut a surprise. i have proof read it, but i think there might be some errors. feel free to correct me.

the air around was charged as the shuffling, heavy pants and moans filled the room. it was another one of kaiser's and yours pathetic dry humping session.

his head leaning on the head-rest while his hands gripped your hips, urging your movements to go faster and faster and faster—till the both of you come undone.

you leaned in to rest your head on his shoulder, the room filling with exhausted panting.

"so good angel," he kissed your temple, "so good."

but a word taunted you in your head. you faced him, meeting your eyes with his, "mihya...am i boring?"

"what are you saying angel?" he raised his eyebrow, clearly confused where that came from, "if this is about sex then no, you're not boring."

it had happened a day ago. you had gone out with your friends. sitting in a public cafe, talking about each other's sex life without a care, shamelessly—no matter how many people stared in surprise and disgust.

shortly after you and your friends were kicked out, the first thing they did was to drag you into a pharmacy. they told you to not to worry about the prescription. you wordlessly agree, taking the small rectangular box of birth control pills—so that you can stop with the boring sex life as your friends described it.

was it boring? sure you and your boyfriend never went any further that that and orals. but so lost in enjoying them, you never thought it would be considered boring and you got self conscious. what if he thinks like them? you worried.

"hey," kaiser cradled your face, his voice so gentle, "where did that come from?"

"tell me," you asked firmly, "do you ever wish to go further than this?"

"all the fucking time," he answered without hesitation, tucking a strand of hair behind your ear, the lovely guesture contrast to his lewd words.

the silence that followed didn't take much time as you started unbuttoning his shirt. just when you were down to two, he gripped your wrist, "are you sure?"

"yes." your response was quick.

he smirked, giving you a go-ahead and you went back to undoing the buttons, not bothering to even take off the shirt off his shoulders as you ran your fingers on his chest to his abs.

you reached his belt, undoing it—him helping you take it off, discarding it somewhere on the floor unconcernedly. he then pulled over your shirt off, unclipping your bra, also throwing away your shorts alongwith your panties.

he asked you if you were sure again. you nodded but he needed words.

"i want this."

"that's my girl," he presses his face in the crook of your neck, "ride me."

the next moment you found him in you. you didn't move however. he didn't let you. telling you that he had to take care of your tits first, running his hands around them.

"i wanna move," you whined, your hands that rested on his shoulders dug into his skin. it didn't pain him. even if he did, he considered it pleasure.

"patience angel, wanna be a good girl for me, don't you?"

you hummed a yes, "i wanna...but i want to move."

"beg."

"please," you pleaded, "i wanna move, mihya...i wanna feel you more...so badly, please."

he smirked, the corner of his lips tugging upwards in a shit eating grin as he coos at you, nodding at you to proceed.

it took you a bit by surprise when he moaned. yes, kaiser moaned. sure, the little pathetic sessions before had him grunting. but nothing compared to how he moaned now as you kept bouncing on his cock.

but other than that, the sight in front of him was to behold. you were getting there, he could tell by the way your bounces fastened and became irregular, following a certain pattern. his hands gripped your hips so tightly as he helps you bounce, the bed creaking and creaking.

the creaking finally stopped as the two of you reached peak and you slowed down, riding out your high.

"angel," he called out softly, "think you can go one more time?"

"yes, god, yes yes!" so lost in the moment, you threw the shame out of the window, letting arousal take over you.

he positioned you beneath him, as he littered kisses down your neck, collarbone—down to your tits, his tongue circling around your nipples without breaking eye contact.

your eyes roll to the back of your head as he aligned his cock in you. your leg over his shoulder, the other one spread out by his grip as he pounds into you with no mercy, "god," he breaths out, "look at you angel, so beautiful." oh how can his words be so lovely when he's fucking the sweet moans out of you.

"w-wait," you halt him.

"angel?"

"...kiss me, please?" and oh how could he say no? he leaned down, capturing your lips with his into a sweet kiss with simultaneously fucking you. he leans lower, biting into your shoulder, making you hiss.

"mihya...so—" you got interrupted when he hit the spot just right, letting a moan surpass your lips, "so c-close."

he chuckles at your pityful words, stopping and before you could even ask why he did so—he flips you around with a swift motion as his grip on your hips tighten, manhandling you to raise your ass upwards, your face squished in the pillow.

he pounds into you mercilessly from back. the room filling in with his moans, your muffled whimpers, the slapping sounds of the skin and creaking of bed. it was so so lewd.

"fuck angel...im not gonna last any longer. you close?"

you barely managed to choke out a muffled yes. at that, his movements grew erratic, though he didn't slow down.

he knew you came when he hears a loud cry of his name muffled. he thrusts into you a few more times as he cums inside you. pulling out, a groan escapes his lips as he sees his release dripping from your pussy.

he lays besides you, gently urging you to face him as he kisses you. he kisses and kisses. slow, fast, biting, licking. all of it, still having a gentle touch to it.

"you did so good angel," he pecks your forehead, "so good for me." he litters more kisses on your face, pulling you into his embrace, telling you how good you did, whispering sweet nothings.

"let's clean up yeah?" he exhales, "then i'll run to the store real quick."

"no need," you say.

"no need?" he questions, "what d'ya mean?"

"i um...brought plan B."

he lets out an airy laugh, "you were prepared, huh?"

"well..." you go on telling him about the conversation you had the day before. how your friends described their sex life. and when it came to you, they said what you and kaiser do was boring. he laughs at that, pulling you closer, calling you a dummy. he was thankful for it nonetheless.

"c'mon let's shower," he says, tho there was a tease in his tone, "another round?"

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hvnlygrl · 1 day ago

Note

jj and his gf who has really bad sensory problems, especially at night when they're going to sleep her shirt always bothers her and she gets so fusturated but jj always knows what to do for her

or with loud noises!!! i feel like he'd be the type to practically whisper you to sleep at night because he knows sometimes all the noise is just way too overwhelming

it’s all too much (can’t get enough).

pairing — jj maybank x fem!reader

word count — 1.7k

warnings — overstimulated reader, reader has a panic attack, fluff, super comforting jj, talk of diagnoses and doctors, mentions of throw-up. hurt/comfort.

synopsis — when everything gets to be too much for you, jj becomes the only thing you can stand, and the one thing you crave more than anything.

notes — this is such a wonderful request as someone who struggles with this on a regular basis and relies on my own bf to calm me down and be my peace and my center to ground myself. i love this sm! i hope you enjoy <3

you weren’t sure when it started; the constant overwhelming feelings that consumed nearly every waking moment you had throughout the day. one doctor said it was normal for a girl your age, especially given the things you’d been through, another said that it was due to an anxiety disorder, and one (though you knew this one was totally full of shit) tried to blame it on obsessive compulsive disorder with a hint of autism.

you had no clue when it got this bad, but you knew that it was reaching the point of becoming unbearable. being in crowds, or anywhere where the background noise was louder than the noise in your mind, made you feel like you needed to puke. clothes that were too tight or too loose, too coarse or too soft, too thick or too thin, drove you nearly to the brink of insanity. it was, as you described it, as if you were completely uncomfortable in your own body at all times.

hearing people hum, sing, tap, or breathe drove you up a wall, and that was on your best day. it was the thing you hated most about yourself, honestly. you hated that you were so easily agitated, and that you couldn’t help the outbursts that came with it.

throughout your school years, as it worsened, you lost friends one by one, until all that was left were the pogues and your boyfriend, jj. not like you needed anything more than them, but still.

you had no idea how jj could put up with you being this way, especially for so long, but you were extremely grateful for him. part of you, deep down inside your heart, was petrified that one day he would have enough and realize that he could do so much better, but for now you were willing to bask in each and every moment you got to have with him.

jj, however, felt the same way about you; he was terrified that you’d wake up one day and realize how broken he was and how unfixable his soul would forever be.

you were both idiots, admittedly, because each and every one of the pogues could tell just from the way that you looked at each other in docile moments that there was absolutely nothing either of you would take in place of the other.

since your relationship started with jj, your anxiety got significantly better, with fewer outbursts and a generally happier state of being becoming your new normal. he grounded you to reality, kept you sane and helped you accept yourself for what you truly were. with jj, you never had to hide anything, never had to mask any emotions or thoughts (no matter how dark or upsetting they may be). you knew he would never judge you for anything you felt or thought, having dealt with his own fair share of breakdowns during his time alive.

when you were crying to the point of hyperventilating over your crop top shirt being too constricting, he would give you his flannel to change into. when your shoes became too tight around your toes, he would pull your favorite slippers from his bag. when your food was too slimy or too crunchy, he’d swap dishes with you. anything to keep you happy, and anything to let you have as close to a normal experience as possible.

jj was a saint, truly. everything he did, he did through his love for you, never once questioning whatever was bothering you, simply just finding the best fix or alternative to calm you back down. it was beautiful.

however, as much as jj could do, he couldn’t always fix the problem. some things were still too far beyond anything he could ever understand, and in those cases, he would just hold you, doing his best to keep you contained and feeling as safe and comforted as possible.

panic attacks were nothing new to you, a weekly occurrence since you were a small child. they stemmed from severe ptsd from your childhood, you knew that. that knowledge felt like it should be enough to be able to push through them when they happened, but it never was.

a sharp pain in your chest, your internal temperature reaching record-breaking highs, your head spinning and full of loud disturbing thoughts, your breathing becoming erratic and your body trembling. you felt like you were going to puke and pass out all at the same time.

the first time it happened around jj, he thought he was going to have to bring you to the hospital or call an ambulance.

the two of you had gotten into a slight, meaningless disagreement over something completely irrelevant. he got a little too loud and before you knew it you had a hand clutching your heart, panting like a dog at the park as you backed as far into the nearest corner as you could. the walls shifted around you, inching closer and closer with every rapid breath you took. you tried to take deeper breaths, attempting to slow your heart before it exploded in your chest, but you couldn’t. you began crying, eyes wide with a thousand yard stare, seeing everything and nothing all at once.

jj watched you for a moment, in terror as he panicked, completely unaware of what was happening or what he should or could do about it. “y/n? what’s happening, baby?”

“i-i-” you struggled to catch a breath that would reach your lungs, “i can’t-”

“are you-what do i do?” he moves toward you, hands extended out warily, “what can i do, baby?”

you turned your head up toward the sky as you slid down the wall until you reached the floor. your eyes were pinched shut, as tight as you could get them, as if that would be enough to throw you back to reality. your arms wrapped around your knees tightly, one hand gripping the other as they wrung themselves together. “water,” it was a whisper, your vision full of black spots when you opened your eyes. this one was particularly bad for some reason, bringing you to the verge of passing out. “please.”

“water,” jj repeats, immediately jumping at the opportunity to help you, “uh, uh,” he searches frantically for a cup from the cabinet, realizing that all of the cups are dirty in the dishwasher, “shit!” he goes to wash one before remembering that you had put a few bottles to cool in the fridge when you’d gotten home earlier that day. “stupid,” he cusses at himself as he sprints to the fridge, rummaging through it until he finds one, perfectly chilled just for you.

he returns, finding you taking deep breaths while humming to yourself softly. it’s rhythmic, though a song he’s never heard before. it’s the song your dad hummed to you when you had the same attacks as a child, he’d hold you, placing a cold washcloth on the back of your neck as he hummed, telling you to rub at the inside of your palms softly to the rhythm. it was an old trick his own mother had done for him when he was a child, and it worked like a charm for you most of the time.

jj returns with the water, moving slower when he approached you, “i got your water, baby,” he speaks softly, his voice tender yet still slightly panicked. “can i get you anything else? do you want a hug or-”

“can you get me a washcloth, please?”

he nods and immediately moves toward the bathroom.

“wet it with cold water,” you call out to him, just loud enough for him to hear it.

jj follows the instructions, wringing it out in the sink before bringing it back to you. he sits on the floor next to you, mimicking your pose as he watches you intently.

you take a sip from the bottle before you drop your forehead to rest on the tops of your knees, the washcloth resting on the back of your neck. you continue taking deep breaths as you hum the tune once more, drawing shapes and massaging the insides of your palms.

after a few minutes, your breathing returns back to normal, your heart rate dropping back to an acceptable rate again. once you feel alright, you turn to look at jj, his concerned blue eyes tugging at your heart.

“are you okay? did i do something? i’m so sorry-”

“it was a panic attack,” your voice is soft, filled with shame as your gaze flutters between his eyes and his necklace. “i get them a lot. sorry you had to deal with that.”

“no, no don’t be sorry,” he places a ringed hand on your shoulder, “that wasn’t your fault, baby, don’t be ashamed of that. i’m just glad i could help you. i know what to do for next time, don’t even worry about it, okay? i was just really worried about you.”

“i know, i’m okay now though,” you nod, your heart warming at his words, “thanks for taking care of me.”

“of course, y/n,” he scoots closer to you, letting you rest your head against his shoulder, “you’re my girl, i’ll always be here to take care of you, babe.”

you smile, though he can't see it, “i love you, jj.”

“i love you, y/n,” he repeats, placing a tender kiss to the top of your head. “anything else i can do for you?”

“i could use a nap,” you huff softly, “that took a lot out of me.”

“yea, i’m sure it did,” he affirms, “let’s go take a nap then.”

jj helps you up from the floor, an arm slung over your shoulders as you both make your way down the hallway and into the bedroom. he pulls back the covers for you, turns the fan on, and the lights off. he even brings your water that you forgot to grab from the living room and places it on your nightstand.

jj slides into the bed beside you, allowing you to get comfortable on his chest as he lies on his back. he rubs a hand on your back, humming the tune you sung earlier softly, putting you right to sleep. he silently prays that you’ll rest as much as you deserve, and that for as long as you’ll have him, he’ll be able to help you more than he could today. he also vows to never be the reason you feel like that again if he can help it.

-> back to masterlist

taglist — @rubiehart @ji4ra4l1f3 @baebankz @sarahsangelicdoll

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dawn-moths · 3 days ago

Text

thinking about tomura being tenko’s older brother where they’re perhaps ten years apart. you and tomura first meet when you’re both eighteen, start hanging out as friends, but you’re only vaguely aware he has a sibling when sometimes he says he can’t hang out that particular weekend because he has to “babysit the brat”.

after a while, you’re able to convince him to show you a picture of his little brother. you’re curious if they look alike, and other than a few features like their eye and hair color, you can easily imagine how tomura looked at that age, too. him and tenko look startling similar to each other even with that many years between them.

“sorry…” tomura grumbles through the other side of your phone call one afternoon. “tenko’s soccer practice got canceled and now my mom’s making me watch him while she’s at work.”

he sounds annoyed, almost embarrassed by the fact that, even at eighteen, he has to obey his mother’s requests, but is ultimately contrite about his last minute change of plans having to effect you so often as well.

“it’s ok,” you assure him with your usual chipper tone, fully understanding the responsibility he has. “but, y’know…” you remind him, “if it’s ok, i could always come over and we could hang out while you’re watching your brother?”

you try and hide your eagerness the best you can. the truth is, you’ve been wanting to meet the mini-tomura for quite some time now. tomura always describes him as annoying, as a needy little brat that whines until he gets his way, but the words are never spit with scorn and there’s something soft in his eyes that always gives away the fact that he actually does care.

tomura usually just brushes off your offer, promises to reschedule with you, so you’re prepared to be let down, but that time, after a short pause of contemplation, tomura clears his throat and says, “i mean, yeah, ok. that’s fine i guess, if you want…”

“ok!” you beam, already grabbing your keys. “i’ll be over soon then!” you hang up, grab your bag, and jump in your car.

any time you’ve been over to tomura’s house (which has been few and far between, since your place tends to be the designated hangout given you usually have the house to yourself most of the time) tenko hasn’t been there. he’s been at his aforementioned soccer practice or a friend’s house or some other activity that’s kept you from meeting him.

you’re so curious it’s overwhelming, and as you pull up to tomura’s house he’s already perched on the front step, gazing at his phone until he hears your car approaching. you park by the curb and scamper up to greet him, giving him a hug as per usual, and though he’d sounded sort of defeated on the phone earlier, seeing your smiling face now makes him feel a little lighter.

“hey,” you grin, momentarily holding both his hands in your own down between your close bodies. sometimes you're reminded how adverse to any kind of physical touch tomura used to be when the two of you had first met. even something as simple as a light, playful nudge would make him flinch, cause him to keep a bit more of a distance for the rest of the day.

but over time, you're not sure exactly why but, something changed.

and it was actually him who came to comfort you that time. you'd been upset, had planned on staying in your room alone until the ache decided to pass. but then you and tomura had started texting. he'd sensed something was wrong so he'd called. he'd heard the heartbreak in your voice, told you he was on his way, and not ten minutes later he was sitting beside you on your bed with his arm around you as you'd talked to him about what had happened while you'd cried.

ever since then, he'd gotten more comfortable with your casual, familiar touches, though he still found it easier to touch you than to be touched by you.

“hey,” he returns, then adds with that hint of that sarcastic humor you’ve come to love so much, “you ready to meet the little demon?”

you laugh, unable to not be amused by his melodrama. “oh, c’mon,” you say, lightly batting at his arm. “he’s only eight, he can’t be that bad!”

all tomura offers in response is a muttered, “yeah, well…” before inviting you inside.

as soon as you walk through the door, a little dog comes bounding towards you, running in energetic circles and barking as his tail wags with both curiosity and excitement. you proceed with caution around the corgi, wanting to reach down to pet him but hesitating around the unfamiliar animal.

the few times you'd been over before, tomura had let his dog out into the yard so he wouldn't end up jumping all over you, so this is the first time you're meeting him up close instead of catching glances of him through a window.

"ugh, sorry..." tomura mutters as he reaches down and scoops his dog up, the canine's tail continuing to wag even more once he's secure in tomura's arms. "i forgot to let him out back..." he then seems to realize something, his eyes widening a bit as he does a double take back at you and asks with a little more guilt in his tone, "you're not afraid of dogs, are you...?"

you wave off his concern with a swish of your hand and a crooked smile. you tell him you're not, you were just a little surprised is all.

"it's mon-chan, right?" you ask, slowly reaching your hand out for the dog to sniff.

"yeah. mon-chan," tomura confirms, readjusting his grip on the wriggling animal. "he's super friendly. just, well..." he gives a half shrug as a small grin cracks at one corner of his mouth. "he can be a lot."

"hey, mon-chan..." you coo, your tone turned sugary sweet, and the dog gives the back of your hand a few friendly licks. "awwww, you're cute, aren't you? what a good boy..."

but before you can dote over the dog too much, something catches your attention from the corner of your eye, causing you to shift your view towards the living room that sits off to the side of the main entrance.

and, lo and behold, there he is.

little tenko and his sweet little face that reminds you so much of the older brother you’ve become so fond of.

“hiiiii,” you greet the little boy with a soft voice and a smile. you know kids can often be wary when meeting new people, so when tenko just stares at you with those big, dark eyes you’re not surprised.

“hey,” tomura grumbles to his sibling. “don’t be rude. say hello.”

tenko then seems to snap out of his cautious trance, looking at his brother then back to you before saying, “is this the girl you’re always talking about, nii-san?”

tomura feels his cheeks heat and his ears burn as he sputters out something that sounds like half an excuse, half a scolding before telling tenko to go watch tv and behave. tenko obeys without any trouble and as you pass by through the living room you can see a popular superhero movie playing on the screen.

you travel down the short hall to where tomura’s bedroom lays at the very end, and once the door is shut he seems to become a little less tense.

“i’ll need to make him lunch in about an hour,” he tells you. “but until then…” he flashes you a suggestive smirk and you know exactly what’s coming.

it's one of your favorite things about hanging out together, the way it relieves the tension, lets you two unleash parts of yourself that you rarely let other people see. and tomura's been surprisingly good at it from the start. you wouldn't have guessed at a glance how skilled those hands could be, how coordinated given his usually lax, nonchalant nature...

he tosses you a game controller and you catch it with ease. “wha’dya say we pick up where we left off?” he asks, a hint of darkness to his voice that you now recognize as cold, hard competition.

you feel a look of confidence spreading across your face at the challenge and you reply in a tone befitting of a worthy opponent, “you’re on.”

the next hour passes quickly as you play your guys' favorite co-op game together, leaving you just two points from tying with tomura, and amidst your laughter and playful taunting, there’s a slight squeak as the door creaks on its hinges, little tenko peeking through the thin crack and observing, letting out a quiet gasp when he realizes he's been spotted.

“i’ll be out in a sec,” tomura tells his brother, already knowing what that expectant look means. tenko seems to linger, casting you another glance, and you convince tomura to pause the game.

“c’mon,” you murmur, giving him that guilt-tripping stare that he hates you for being so good at. “let’s go make him lunch and then we can finish this after.”

and it’s that suggestion of we, that suggestion of together, that has him pausing the game and setting his controller aside, standing from his bed to open the door to his little brother and following him down the hall to the kitchen, you close behind.

tomura takes out a tupperware from the fridge and has just popped it in the microwave when his phone buzzes from his pocket. "it's my mom," he states. "gimme one sec." he steps out of the kitchen and begins to wander towards the living room, his voice growing more distant as you hear him pick up the call. you hope everything is ok. but, for now, it's just you and tenko standing in the kitchen, the eight-year-old gazing up at you with that big, curious stare while the microwave counts down the seconds behind him.

"can i have lemonade?" he asks once you meet his eyes and give him a friendly grin.

the microwave beeps and you go to take his lunch out of it. "sure," you answer. but then, a little bit more suspiciously, you ask, "does tomura usually let you have lemonade?"

tenko nods, not giving anything away as you finish plating the other items of his lunch while tomura remains on the phone in the living room. from where you stand, if you glance just slightly around the entryway, you can see him sitting on the couch, leaning forward a bit while he continues to speak with his voice low. you just hope his mom won't be mad that he invited you over while she wasn't home.

it's not like you hadn't been over before when his house was empty, but given this is the first time you've met his little brother, you just hope you're not overstepping somehow. not to mention that, unbeknownst to you, tomura's mom had begun badgering him about meeting you before the end of summer. as soon as she'd caught onto the fact that her eldest son had been hanging out regularly with a girl, she couldn't help but become curious as to what kind of girl she might be.

a bit distracted by your thoughts, you just nod and say to tenko, "ok, sure, you can have some lemonade then."

once his chicken tenders and apple slices and animal crackers are promptly arranged on his plate and a glass of lemonade is poured, you carry tenko's lunch to the table and take a seat across from him while you wait for tomura to conclude his conversation, trying to keep your growing anxiety at bay at any possible problems that may be arising due to that phone call.

you try to listen in, though mostly hear the standard, vague, "yeah. uh-huh. alright," responses from tomura until—

"are you my brother's girlfriend?"

you blink at tenko, taken aback as you sputter over a response to that, wondering for a moment if you merely imagined it. then, once your nervous giggling and bashfulness begins to dissipate, you clear your throat and say, "did tomura tell you that?"

tenko takes another bite from one of his apple slices and says, "no. but he talks about you all the time. he says you're his friend, but i hear him talking to his friends at night when he thinks no one is listening."

you stare at tenko with an intensity you don't realize you're wearing on your face at first, the suspense eating you alive. eventually, when tenko doesn't seem like he's going to offer more, you lower your voice to something closer to a whisper, your gaze darting back to where you can barely see tomura sitting in the other room, still on the phone, and ask tenko, "what do you hear him say?"

tenko, his big eyes moving up and to the right, contemplates that for a moment as he finishes chewing and swallowing his next bite, then tells you, "i don't know exactly. i can't hear what his other friends are saying, but one time i heard nii-san say that you were special." you feel your cheeks heat and again glance over at the back of the boy you've become so fond of so quickly. "he said something about not wanting to ruin anything," tenko continues, reciting the words as if he doesn't quite grasp their meaning. but then, tenko's mouth splits into a mischievous little grin that reminds you so much of tomura, it's honestly a little scary. he says, seeming to find amusement in his next words, "one time, i heard him say you were like his guardian angel or something..."

a childish little giggle bubbles up from tenko's lips, almost as if he finds a cruel kind of pleasure in knowing his older brother's biggest secret, but this information just makes your heart all the more warmer towards tomura.

you'd spent the last couple of months suffering inside your own head about it all— about whether you really meant something to tomura, about if he cared for you as much as you did for him or if you were simply just convenient and would be discarded come any significant distance put between the two of you—

suddenly tenko seems to retract, perhaps sensing your discomfort, so you take the opportunity to clear the nerves and giddiness from your throat and change the subject.

"so, tenko," you begin, trying to straighten out your crooked smile. "tomura tells me you play soccer. do you like it?"

tenko gives a shrug at first, taking another bite of an apple slice that's had the skin peeled and cut to resemble rabbit ears. then he says, "i guess so. but i like watching movies more."

you ask him what kinds of movies he likes, recalling the superhero blockbuster that had been playing on the tv when you'd first arrived, and feel a spark of endearment as tenko's face lights up as he delves into telling you all about his favorite characters and their cool powers.

"wow! you sure know a lot!" you commend him with a beaming smile, and at the compliment tenko's face begins to turn a little red. "do you and tomura ever watch movies together?"

"not really..." the younger sibling sulks, pouting as he peels the remainder of the skin from his apple slice. "nii-san is usually playing video games in his room and my mom says i'm not allowed to play them because they're too violent..." then, before you can tell him that's too bad but one day he'll be old enough to play the same games as his brother, tenko perks back up and tells you, "but sometimes... sometimes nii-san lets me into his room on nights our mom works late and we play mario kart together."

you have to force yourself to stifle a laugh at that. i mean, it's just completely adorable, isn't it? the thought of tomura, who tries so hard to play it off like he couldn't care less about his little brother, like he's nothing more than a nuisance to him, a pest, an inconvenience, does actually take the time to bond with him anyway. at least, when no one's looking.

you tell tenko you also like mario kart, then lean in and add in a playful whisper, "but i bet he doesn't tell you about all the times i've beaten him, does he?"

tenko regards you with blatant skepticism. "no way," he says, as if he's never been more sure about anything in his life. "there's no way you can beat nii-san. he's too good! no one can beat him!"

now you laugh openly, causing tomura to glance over his shoulder just to make sure there isn't too much chaos ensuing in his brief absence, but tenko just looks confused.

"well," you reply, amusement trailing off the end of your words, "he is pretty good. i'll give him that. but unbeatable..." you quirk up one brow and wear a slight smirk for a moment before allowing your features to fall back to normal. then you tell tenko, "just give it time. one day i bet you'll be able to beat him. i believe in you!"

"you behavin' in here?" tomura suddenly appears in the entryway, slipping his phone back into his pocket as he casts his little brother a warning look.

"your girlfriend says she beat you in mario kart, is that true?" tenko blurts out, and you have to force yourself not to tease tomura when his cheeks visibly darken at the mention of you being his girlfriend.

"everything ok?" you ask to defuse the situation a little and put tomura back at ease, but then his look of bashfulness morphs into a look of slight surprise at the sight you and his little brother getting along so well.

quickly, he snaps out of it, and replies, "yeah. she was just checking in," before seeming to notice something awry about the picture here, specifically on tenko's side of the table.

"hey," tomura lightly scolds his brother. "you know mom only lets you have lemonade on the weekends." you immediately begin to apologize, saying that when he asked you thought it would be ok, and feel embarrassed that you let yourself be manipulated by a child, but tomura assures you it's fine before returning to interrogate his little brother who, admittedly, looks very guilty now.

"did you lie to her?" he presses, and for a moment you're afraid he'll make tenko cry. tenko denies it at first and you observe with growing anxiety as the argument between them ramps up a bit.

it isn't until you reach over to place a hand over tomura's, which has been firmly planted on the tabletop as he leans in over his brother, that he seems to simmer down a little.

"one time will be ok, won't it?" you ask him, not wanting to ruin the moment you'd just shared with tenko, feeling like you'd gained a little more of his trust. you use your secret weapon, the one thing tomura can never say no to whenever he sees it— that sweet, pleading stare you give as you gaze up at him, the look that makes his stomach flutter and his head haze over with thoughts he'll be revisiting later once he's alone.

"fine," he concedes, some of the rigidity that had captured his limbs leaving him as he steps away from the table. he looks directly at his brother and concludes with a warning, "but just this once."

you're relieved, and tenko appears to have returned to his prior state of unfazed contentment, but tomura still seems impatient about something.

"c'mon," he says, beckoning you up from the table to follow him back to his room. "we still have a game to finish."

you give tenko a parting smile before humming out an amused, lilting little note, trailing after tomura as you chirp out a mischievous remark of, "are you gonna actually help us win this time? or am I gonna have to carry the entire round again?"

he lets out an incredulous, albeit amused, chuckle, surprising you by throwing his arm around your shoulders and tugging you in closer to his side so you almost stumble down the hallway. "oh, just you wait..." brazen, he murmurs in your ear, his voice low and dark, now allowing the butterflies in your tummy to unfurl their delicate wings and take flight, "by the time we're done with this round, the other team isn't even gonna know what hit 'em..."

and, with that, you once again return to the confined space of his only slightly disheveled bedroom, the tv screen still bearing the scores from your last game. although, admittedly, as you continue to sit side by side, knees nudging one another here and there when things start to get a little too desperate or rowdy, you can't help but find yourself a little more distracted and self-conscious than usual.

because you swear you catch tomura glancing at you in between rounds from the corner of your eye, something softer, something warmer than you're quite used to possessing his crimson gaze.

it's a side to him you've rarely gotten to see, but you hope he'll learn to wear it a little more openly around you as time goes on.

besides, when his little brother had asked if you were his girlfriend, he hadn't quite said no, now had he?

#word count: 3600+#helloooo this has been in my drafts since the summer time oh my gosh #this is just a fluffy lil sfw piece btw #dont know if i'll end up expanding on it but i just think the thought of tomura and tenko being siblings is so cute T^T <3 #also I imagine this is like a friends to lovers type thing with tomura #and like you’re just on the cusp of actually dating but haven’t like done anything other than really hug and hold hands a little bit yet #like maybe it’s the summer before you guys are going off to college and you’re spending a lot of time together #and he plans on telling you how he really feels about you before the end of summer #anywaaaaaaaayyyyyy just wanted to finish this lil idea up because. yeah. its been sitting in my drafts for forever.#and i miss him <3 #drabble #tomura x reader #tomura x y/n #tomura x you #bnha x reader #bnha x you #bnha x y/n #mha x y/n #mha x you #mha x reader #shigaraki x reader #shigaraki x you #shigaraki x y/n #boku no hero academia fanfic #my hero academia fanfic #tomura shigaraki x reader #tomura shigaraki x you #tomura shigaraki x y/n

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peri4stral · 2 days ago

Text

For Sweets

Pairing: Bsf! James Potter x F! Reader

Word count: 9k

Synopsis: You and James have been best friends for ages, but when you go to the potters for Christmas break, certain feelings come to light.

Warnings: MDNI! Mentions of the reader having familial problems, few uses of Y/N, eventual smut, reader is described as shorter than James, porn with a lot of plot, oral (f! receiving), unprotected piv, no pull-out

The pub you and your friends frequent is not far from campus or your flat with Marlene. You two decide to walk despite the chill in the air; Marlene never seems to get cold. A contrast to you, who began to shiver the moment you stepped out of the comfort of your flat. The walk is unexpectedly pleasant despite the cold that nips at your nose. Snow has just begun to fall, clinging to the pavement and dusting your hair when you hear a distant whooping.

Down the street opposite you, you see the familiar faces of Sirius and Remus. You immediately notice the lack of James as you hear Sirius whistle and holler. “Oi, lovelies! Are you not freezing your knickers off?” he yells far too loudly as he approaches.

“My blood runs hot, Sirius, you know that,” Marlene laughs as she runs up to him, giving him what you assume is a bone-crushing hug.

“S’pose I was talking about our lovely Y/N. James would kill me if I let his Sweets freeze!” The sound of the nickname James had given you back in your first year of Hogwarts feels foreign coming from a mouth that isn’t his.

“I’m fine, Pads, don’t you worry about me,” you reply, though your teeth chattering leaves Sirius unconvinced. With a peck on the cheek, he gently plucks the hat off Remus’s head and places it on yours. “There, all better!” Sirius grins, clearly proud of his chivalrous deed before he links your arm with his and continues on your path to the pub.

“I thought James was coming?” Marlene asks, looking back between Sirius and Remus. You’re glad that you weren’t the one to ask. There’s no need to give your friends another opportunity to pick on James and your friendship.

“Monty called him just before we left. James said he’d meet us at the pub,” Sirius shrugs. “He’s probably making sure everything is in order for when we go home.” He squeezes your arm a little tighter.

Before you know it, you find yourself at the familiar table, back to the door as you sit across from Marlene. Sirius is off grabbing some drinks for the table and Remus is setting up a game of billiards.

The leather beneath you is cracked and worn by the patrons over the years, and your fingers trace the stitching of the seat as Marlene gushes about Dorcas.

“I just don’t know, I mean I think she might like me, honest! But what if she’s just being friendly?” Marlene puts her head in her hands, exasperatedly.

“Marls, it doesn’t sound like she’s just being friendly! You said she was being all touchy,” you point out. “Friends aren’t just like that!”

“Well, what about you and James?” Marlene raised her eyebrow. You became aware of the clamminess of your palms. “You’re constantly all over each other!” She sounds more accusatory than you’re prepared to address.

“That’s different!” You assert.

“How is that any different?!” Marlene looks very pleased with herself as your eyes go wide.

“It just is!” You say a little too loud. “James and I have been best friends for years.” Marlene starts to open her mouth to say something, but her eyes focus on something behind you.

Before you have a chance to look, you feel a warmth radiating from behind you as the hat Sirius snatched from Remus for you is pulled over your eyes. “Guess who,” a cheerful voice chimes.

A smile spreads across your face before you move the hat back up your head. “Jamie!” You playfully chide. You stand and wrap your arms around his shoulders, acutely aware of his scent that reminds you so strongly of home.

“Hello, Sweets,” he says, wrapping his arms around your waist. You can feel Marlene’s eyes burning into you before you return to your seat and James takes his next to yours.

“What did Monty want?” Sirius asks as he returns with drinks and beckons Remus back over to your table. He had just finished racking and made his way over.

“Just making sure we’re still coming,” James smiles at the table.

“He worries too much,” Sirius says, taking a swig. Remus leans over the table and takes a bottle.

“Who’s up for billiards?” Remus challenges before the table breaks out in cheers.

The next few hours are spent laughing and drinking with lots of Marlene getting flustered over the game. Despite the stress of upcoming exams, you allow yourself to fully melt into the moment. The atmosphere is something you wouldn't trade for anything: your best friends, full of love and laughter.

A couple groups of students linger towards the end of your night along with a few older patrons you have come to know as regulars. You look up at the clock, noting the time. Not too late, but with your final two exams less than 48 hours away, you figure it’s time to call it a night.

“Oi, pretty lady!” a man calls drunkenly across the pub. “What does a guy gotta do to get a date with you?” He comes up to your table and leans over you. “What d’ya say sweetheart?” James takes a swig of his drink.

“Well, as much as I’d love to, I should actually be getting home,” you explain in the kindest tone you can muster. You begin to stand to walk to Marlene but the man follows your movements. You can smell the alcohol on his breath. “Come on, baby,” he says as you pull on your jacket and try to ignore him. “I don’t bite!”

“Mate, she’s not interested,” Sirius barks across the table. The man is clearly about to say more, but closes his mouth as Remus appears behind Sirius. Remus, despite his gentle nature, is very visually imposing and much taller than the man, who scoffs, and walks away.

“I’m about ready to head out, what about you, Marls?” you ask, trying to ignore the feeling gnawing in your stomach.

“Yeah about that…” Marlene begins. You look at her with wide eyes.

“You’re going to see Dorcas again?” you jeer. “I guess I’ll just have to walk home all alone!” You sigh dramatically.

“You know I’ll always walk you home, Sweets,” James says tenderly as he slips on his jacket. It glides elegantly over his toned arms and you can't help but admire him. “Only if you’d like of course,” he says. You almost think he sounds nervous.

“Yeah, of course. I’d like that,” You say snapping yourself back into the moment.

“Well, Padfoot, Moony, it looks like it’s time for Sweets and I to head out. I’ll see you later?”

“Yeah, don’t have too much fun,” Sirius quips, and Remus elbows him. You try to ignore the comment and instead, turn to Marlene.

“Say ‘hi’ to Dorcas for me,” you say as Marlene gives you her signature bear hug.

You and James slip out the pub door to find the snow still falling. Looking beside you as you start down the road you see the snow gently landing in James’s dark curls. You look at him a moment longer, tracing the lines of his face with your eyes.

“Enjoying the view, Sweets?” James startles you and you avert your gaze immediately.

“I was just thinking,” you begin, now looking at your feet. “Thank you for walking me home,” you look back to see him smiling kindly. He reaches out a bare hand to hold your gloved one; he and Marlene seem to share that kind of warmth.

“You don’t even have to mention it, Sweets. I meant it when I said I’d always walk with you. I enjoy the company,” his tender smile shifts to a cocky smirk. “Besides, you would be oh so bored without me!” You roll your eyes, but you know he’s right.

✫✫✫✮✫✫✫

“Jamie, you can’t walk home in that,” you motion to the window. The snow hasn’t stopped since you walked to the pub hours ago, and the streets are now coated in thick blankets of white while the snow comes down heavier and heavier.

“It’s not very far. I’ll be fine, Sweets,” James says reassuringly, though your years of friendship and the tell-tale tousling of his hair tell you that he is dreading it just as much as you are.

“No, you won’t,” you assert. “You’ll stay the night. It’s not like it’s the first time,” you say without waiting for a response, though you notice the tension melt from his shoulders. You don’t mean to sound bossy, but there’s no way in hell you’ll let your best friend walk out in that weather. “I’ll get some blankets and take the couch.”

“Absolutely not!” He protests. “I’m not kicking you out of your bed!” He steps closer and you take an involuntary step back.

“You're not kicking me out, James, I’m offering,” you tell him.

“Well I’m declining,” he says smugly. Merlin, that smirk.

“James, please,” you say exasperated. Something shifts in James. The smug look is replaced by something softer.

“What if we just both take the bed?” James asks, finally done protesting. Your heart pounds a little harder. It shouldn’t be weird, you and James have been best friends for years. You shared a bed when you were younger, what’s different now?

He is. He’s taller and broader in a way that makes your heart leap into your throat. His boyish charm was replaced long ago with something that makes you dizzy. You’re different. Your desires even more so.

“Fine,” you concede.

“Which side do you want?” James asks as you enter your room.

“This one,” you answer as you walk to your side and begin to turn down the blankets and sheets. James does the same, and you can almost imagine this as the norm. You observe his form clumsily turning down the sheets before he looks up.

“D’you want to have a pillow in between?”

“Only if it would make you more comfortable,” you answer almost too quickly. “I’m gonna brush my teeth,” you say as you grab some clothes to change into and walk to your bathroom. As the tap runs, you wet your brush you begin to zone out. Thoughts of James plague your mind. You imagine what it would be like to crawl into bed with him and fall asleep wrapped around each other like you'd wanted for so long. You know it is a futile thought, James sees you as one of his best friends, nothing more. Why is that not enough for you?

You finish up and pull out an unused brush for James. After slipping out of your jeans and jumper, you put on your shorts and T-shirt. “I left a brush for you on the counter,” you say as you reenter the room.

“Thanks,” he says with a smile. “D’you maybe have a shirt like that I can borrow?” You look down at your baggy T-shirt and feel heat rush to your face.

“Yeah, let me grab one,” you walk to your closet and pick out a shirt that you think will fit. He disappears into the bathroom with the shirt and you slide into bed. When James reappears, you roll to face the door as he strides towards the bed. The shirt did not, in fact, fit. Your eyes trace over his body, from his blue plaid boxers to the bit of toned waist that your Queen shirt doesn’t cover.

“Should I get the light?” he asks before slipping into the bed.

“Yeah, that’d be great,” you say. He fiddles with the switch and as the room goes dark, lays down facing you. Soft moonlight filters in through the blinds as you stare into each other's eyes, inches apart.

“You excited to go back home?” James asks, referencing your trip to his parent's house for Christmas. Home he called it. It had been your haven so many times throughout your years at Hogwarts.

“Of course,” you say, a smile spreading across your face. “I can’t wait for Effie’s cooking, Merlin, I swear there’s nothing better.” James chuckles at your enthusiasm. You just smile at each other for a moment before you yawn.

He matches your yawn. “Y’gave it to me,” he mutters through it. You fight your heavy eyelids but soon enough your eyes fall closed. You listen to James’ breathing as it slowly evens out. You roll over, back facing him, and quickly drift off to sleep.

✫✫✫✮✫✫✫

The early morning light filters through the window. Your eyes just barely flutter open to see the barely risen sun poking over the horizon. It looks cold outside. With that realization, you notice the warmth that surrounds you. You remember the events of last night and recognize James’ arm draped around your waist. The warmth is nice. A stark contrast to the cold you know waits just outside of your blankets. You feel at peace enveloped in James’ arms. You’re too tired to think about it fully.

✫✫✫✮✫✫✫

Your eyes open to the sound of the kettle whistling and a distant mutter. “Shit, shhh,” you hear faintly. You blink the sleep from your eyes and roll over to see the spot where James had slept empty. You're suddenly freezing, remembering the warmth of James wrapped around you.

Pushing that thought to the back of your mind, you pull on your pink fuzzy socks and a jumper. You leave the shorts you slept in on and step out of your bedroom door. Marlene’s is still closed and you hear careful clattering of dishes from the kitchen.

As you walk down the hall, James comes into view with a tea towel slung over his shoulder as he stands in front of your hob. The floor creaks beneath your feet as you approach and James turns, his curls bouncing as he does.

“What’re you making?” You ask noticing him still in your too-short shirt from the night before.

“Bangers and mash,” he says with a shrug.

“For breakfast?” You cock an eyebrow.

“You really need to go shopping,” he replies smoothly. “It’s what I could make with what you’ve got.”

“I didn’t even realise we had enough for that. Marls was s’posed to go days ago,” you walk into the cramped kitchen and observe the two mugs laid out on the counter. “For me?” You ask.

“Yeah, I figured this was the least I could do to repay you for letting me stay,” James says, motioning to the meal he’s cooking.

“Jamie, you really didn’t have to do all this,” you say grabbing your mug. “It wasn’t a problem,” you insist.

“Well still, felt like doing something nice,” he smiles sweetly.

“You’ll be giving your mum a run for her money with the way it smells,” you say as you sit in your dining area and watch James finish. “Plates are up —” he already knows where they are as he reaches into your cupboard and pulls out two.

“Is Marlene home?” He asks. You peek around the corner and see her door closed.

“Think so. I wouldn’t count on her being up in time for breakfast though,” you say with a fond smile. James chuckles and sets a plate down in front of you. He places his own across from yours and sits.

“What’s that?” James asks pointing to the comically tall stack of books and loose papers.

“Why’d you have to remind me,” you groan. “I really should be studying for my last final exams.” With elbows on the table, you place your head in your hands and massage your temples. You were stressed. You tried to deny it to enjoy your time with your friends but eventually, reality always creeps back in. You were stressed.

“I could help if you wanted,” James offered. “If you’d rather study alone I understand. I’d be shocked, of course, I mean, I’m a great study partner but, if you’d rather be boring-”

“James,” you cut him off. You imagine he could ramble on and on if you let him. The cocky smile drops from his face slowly. “I’d love for you to help me.”

The smile quickly reappears, this time with a softer undertone.

The two of you pick at the food James made slowly, plates being pushed farther and farther across the table as books consume the space in front of you. James was right. He is an excellent study partner. Though when you weren’t busy studying the pages in front of you, you were studying his features; sharp yet gentle in the same way he is.

Everyone knew James was a troublemaker, back in Hogwarts and still today. Not everyone knew that James is one of the smartest people you’ve ever met. He easily picks up any challenge thrown at him and promptly masters it. Yet somehow, he doesn’t let it get to his head… too much.

✫✫✫✮✫✫✫

Hours of flashcards and practice quizzes later, you’re wrapping up, much more confident than you were before when Marlene finally emerges from her room. It’s well past noon, but this is typical for Marls. If she doesn’t have to be up, she won’t be. What’s not typical for Marlene, is Dorcas following after her in a skirt clearly from last night, and one of Marlene’s jumpers.

You’re closing your final textbook when James shoots you a look as Marlene guides Dorcas to the door with a hand on the small of her back. They’re giggling about something as they put on their shoes and you raise your eyebrows at Marlene. She returns the look and walks outside with Dorcas.

The door closes and in a second you and James are at the peephole fighting to see. His height gives him the advantage. “Shhh!” he flails his hands motioning to be quiet and you give up fighting him.

“What are they doing?” You whisper-shout.

“They’re just talking,” James says, face still pressed against the door. “They’re smiling. Wait, they’re laughing.” Not being able to watch drives you crazy.

“Jamie, please just let me see!” You whine.

“Just wait, Sweets,” he says calmly. Oh, wait, hold on. " It’s silent for a few seconds. “Merlin,” James says, breaking the silence as he pulls away from the door. She actually did it.”

“What!?” You push James away from the door finally and take a look for yourself. Marlene’s hands are on either side of Dorcas’s face as you watch years of pining all pay off. “Blimey! She actually did it!” You echo James. You look away after Dorcas rests her hands on Marlene’s hips. You and James look at each other, mouths agape, dumbfounded.

The doorknob rattles a bit, and you and James scramble back to the table, trying to look as nonchalant as possible. Marlene closes the door, smiling. She takes off her shoes and looks up at the pair of you. “You guys can stop pretending y’know. I heard you against the door,” she shrugs.

✫✫✫✮✫✫✫

Euphemia Potter opens the door with a wide grin that matches her son’s and wastes no time pulling him into a crushing hug. This type of aggressive affection seems to run in the family. The house smells of incense and vanilla; Effie must have been baking. James goes to Fleamont next, Effie takes hold of Sirius, and finally you.

“How are you, my dear?” She asks warmly. “I trust James had been behaving himself?” She gives a sly smile and heat rushes to your face.

“Of course, Mrs. Potter. Jamie is always a gentleman,” your eyes glide to James, who is facing you from across the foyer when he sends a wink your way.

“Let me take your bags, dear,” Fleamont offers. You smile and hand your things over.

“Thank you, Mr. Potter,” you say.

“Oh, don’t bother with the formalities, dear,” Fleamont chuckles. “You’ve been around enough you could be our daughter.” You feel that warmth in your chest that the Potter’s always bring out.

“Why does she get her bags carried?” Sirius whines.

✫✫✫✮✫✫✫

“Now that you’re home, I hope you’d all like to help with the tree!” Euphemia’s eyes gleamed as you sat around the mahogany table. A table that has seen countless meals with the Potters and honorary Potters. A table that is worn with years of stubbed toes and bumped hips. With memories.

“Oh, Euphemia. Trust that this will be the best-dressed tree you’ve ever seen,” Sirius says, dramatically planting his fingertips against the wood.

As serving plates fly around the table and conversation blooms, you can’t help but feel a certain bitter-sweet bliss. The warm and inviting environment of the Potters is something you wouldn’t trade for the world, but that lack of warmth in your family tends to make the holidays hard.

James catches your eye. “You okay?” He says across the table as the elder Potters and Sirius engage in some talk of him and Remus.

“Yeah,” you say. “I’m just glad to be home,” you flash a grateful smile and James returns it with his upside-down smirk.

✫✫✫✮✫✫✫

The boxes fly around the room, organising themselves on the ground as James and Fleamont carry the questionably tall fir through the halls. Sirius immediately goes to open the ornaments, his eyes reflecting the glimmer of the baubles. You open the box of lights to test if they still work. They don’t, of course, not completely. You run the strand through your hands, searching to find a visible problem.

The problem, it seems, is a single shattered bulb. You unplug the lights and reach onto the table where your wand was left. “Illuminatis,” you pronounce. Your wand produces a faint yellow light as the pieces seem to reassemble. You lean across the shag rug and plug the lights back in.

“Always knew you were the smart one, Sweets,” James says, standing in Sirius’ way, as the lights illuminate the room, eyes locked onto you. You roll the lights into a ball.

“Glad you finally caught on, Jamie,” you call back, walking the lights to the tree. You see in your periphery Sirius fake gagging and James giving him a firm clap on the back. You feel the heat rush to your face again. Effie helps you string the lights up. The scent of pine envelops you as you pass the string of lights between yourself and Effie, slowly working your way up the tree. You struggle on your tiptoes, attempting to reach the top with needles poking everywhere when James appears behind you, plucking the ball of lights from your hands.

“Here, love,” he strings up the last of the lights.

“I’ll start with the tinsel!” Sirius cries out, nearly toppling over an armchair in the process. He removes the tinsel draped around his neck in a makeshift scarf and pushes you and James away from the tree. “Everyone stand back,” he spreads his arms wide. “Let me work my magic.”

You slump onto the sofa, James beside you, arm casually slung around your shoulders and you find yourself appreciating the domestic feel of it all. Watching Sirius meticulously place his tinsel while leaning into James’s embrace. You could get used to it.

“Oi, when will you let us take a turn?” James complained as Sirius moved on from the tinsel to the ornaments.

“I have more of an eye for this, Prongs, we know this,” Sirius mumbles while placing a golden bauble. Euphemia hurries into the room with a platter of ginger snap cookies. James lunges towards them before she sets them down and even Sirius takes a break from his precise decorating to snag a cookie.

James sits huddled over the cookies when Fleamont and Euphemia sit on the other end of the sofa, Monty’s arm around Effie’s shoulder. Your stomach flutters at the thought of you and James growing up to be them before the reality of your friendship twists in your heart. You barely notice Sirius’ spectacle of placing his final ornament.

“Monty d’you want to place the star?” Sirius asks.

“You kids do it this year, Monty smiles affectionately at Sirius and you, James still hunched over the ginger snaps.

“M’lady,” Sirius bows as he hands you the star. “Would you Like to do the honours?”

“Y’know you can be such a gentleman when you try,” you say with a smile. You take the star from his hands and walk to the tree. As you approach, you realize again just how tall the tree is. You step up on your toes again, stretching your arms as high as they can reach, just barely unable to reach it. You feel James’s presence behind you and his hands on your waist. Your hands instinctively go to push him away, a flush of embarrassment washing over you. “I could just use a stool, Jamie,” you protest.

“But I’m right here,” he says, his breath warm against your ear. “And the stool is all the way over there. Just trust me, Sweets.” you move your hands away and reach up with the star again. He only lifts you a few centimetres, an honestly unnecessary gesture, but James has always been good at being close to you. Just enough to make your heart skip.

When James sets you down, you both step back to admire the tree. “You do have an eye for it, Sirius,” you say, sitting back on the sofa. James follows you like a shadow, snagging another cookie before sitting next to you.

You all sit for a long while, basking in the light of the tree and the warmth of the fire. Effie goes to bed first. Monty sticks around awhile, telling stories of his Hogwarts days, before eventually joining his wife.

“Well, I think it’s time for me to surrender to sleep,” Sirius yawns. “You coming, Prongs?”

“Sounds good to me,” James says, catching Sirius’ yawn. “G’night, Sweets,” James says.

“Night, boys, I think I’ll stay a little while, ” you say as they begin to walk to their rooms. You hear Sirius’ footsteps start up the stairs, then, James’s footsteps padding across the hardwood floor. He grabs another cookie.

“My before-bed cookie,” he explains with a wink. He follows after Sirius and you giggle a bit to yourself before you’re interrupted by your own yawn. You fall asleep in the light of the tree.

✫✫✫✮✫✫✫

You wake up to the sound of footsteps pattering in the kitchen. You don’t remember grabbing a blanket, but you throw the one covering you off and make your way to the kitchen. You see James standing in front of the sink, in nothing but his plaid, red pyjama pants, filling a tall glass of water.

James turns around, adjusting his glasses to focus on you as you enter in your shorts and tank top. “What’re you doing up?” James whispers.

“I heard you in the kitchen,” you whisper back. “I was on the couch.”

“I know, I gave you a blanket,” James shrugs. “I didn’t want you to get cold,” “Well, there's the fire too,” you quietly say back.

“I know, I put another log on it,” he steps towards you. “I really didn’t want you to get cold.” You couldn’t help but grin at the man standing before you. It’s so easy to love him. Even when you try not to, you love him. “Why’d you fall asleep on the couch?” James’s grin turns into a face of genuine curiosity.

“I just wanted to be in front of the tree…” you admit. “My family’s never been the type y’know. I just love you all so much, ‘n it makes me so happy to spend the holidays with you,” your nose stings with tears threatening to form.

“Sweets, I-” James starts. “We love you too.” Heat flushes your face with words left unspoken. You take a step forward without registering it, and he follows suit. “Do you want to talk more about it?” Another step.

The moonlight filters through the window across the kitchen. He looks so beautiful. You think to yourself as you take another step forward.

She looks so beautiful. James’s mind flashes with thoughts he shouldn’t have of his best friend. He takes a sip of his water and takes another step.

You take a step closer and by the time he sets his water down, you’re practically chest to chest. The moonlight reflects off of his glasses. You look past them into his eyes, trying to decipher them. The same innocent look in his eyes that you always saw in moments like this shifts to a look you’ve not seen before; a certain darkness to his hazel eyes.

His brows furrow in what looks like some internal turmoil before every muscle in his face relaxes. You take a step closer and James opens his eyes, looking between your eyes and lips. He lifts a tentative hand to your face, brushing a thumb along your cheek. You tilt your chin up at him, rising to your toes ever so slightly. He lowers his face. You can feel his warm breath against your face.

His breath hitches in his throat, as you lean closer together. It’s so quiet out. The soft fresh snow outside muffles any sound surrounding the house. All that you can hear is the thumping of your heart against your ribs, and every thought in your head screaming at you to kiss him. James bends down before you can debate it any further.

He presses his lips to yours cautiously, almost scared. Every voice in your head stops at once, leaving only the feeling of his lips on yours. While he holds your face in either hand, you wrap your arms around his neck, deepening the kiss. You tug on his curls slightly, earning a deep moan against your mouth. He presses his forehead against yours. “Fuck,” he whispers. “You don’t know how long I've wanted that,” he smiles giddily, his glasses crooked.

“Jamie,” You breathe. That’s all it takes for him to be back on you. With lips anchored to your own and a hand tangled in your hair, his other hand trails down your body. From gently tracing your jaw he slides his hand down your neck, fingers brushing against your collarbone.

His hands find the crook of your back, massaging gentle circles into your skin. You bring your hands to his shirtless waist, scratching along his sides, feeling his toned abs and the heat of his skin. You shiver at his movement around your waistband. You feel his hand move to the fabric of your red thong. He runs his fingers under your waistband, just to feel you squirm.

“Jamie, stop teasing!” You whine. He only smiles against your lips before he moves his grip from your waist to your hips. He grips your ass and lifts you in the air, wrapping your legs around his waist. He sets you on the island countertop, the cool marble of the counter stings against your ass.

Your hand which was wrapped around his neck, instinctively reaches for his hair, tugging at a handful of curls. He pulls away and throws his head back with a groan. James has wanted this for so long. He has thought of this moment a million times in a million different ways. Never before did he think it would feel this good. He rubs circles onto your hips with his thumbs while moving his lips to your neck.

“You taste so sweet,” he breathes against your skin. You tilt your head to the side and let out a breathy moan. You pull him closer with your legs, craving some form of relief from the heat rising through your body. You feel him smile against your neck. “Have some patience, Sweets. We have all the time in the world now.”

You scratch your nails down his back while your face is buried in his hair. You gently move his face to meet yours and pluck his glasses off. You turn to set them on the counter and when you turn back to face him, you kiss him again. Slower, more innocently.

The innocence is soon gone when you run your hands down his chest, stroking your nails down his abs, resting on his waistband. He looks down at you, eyes dark. “James,” you whisper.

He’s on you in an instant. His tongue licks along your bottom lip, waiting for an entrance, which you gladly oblige. Your core presses against him, with nothing but the thin fabric of your shorts separating you.

James and you are so involved with each other, that you don’t even hear Sirius enter. Sirius walks around the corner of the kitchen rubbing his eyes groggily, not noticing the sight before him. He reaches into the cupboard, grabs a tall glass, and turns on the sink. It's not until his water is almost full that he hears it. Lips on lips and heavy breathing.

He turns around slowly, water still flowing. He wipes a stray hair out of his face to clear his vision. A vision of James and you, snogging on the kitchen counter. His water is overflowing now, he stares in shock, James finally fucking did it. Sirius had been telling James for months now to make a move. And he finally did. Sirius stops the sink, takes a sip of water, and walks back upstairs, a proud smile gracing his features.

You open your eyes, from the creak of a nearby floorboard. You pull apart from James, looking around for the source of the noise. “Is Sirius up?” you ask James.

“No, he was dead asleep when I came down.”

“Wonderful,” you smile blissfully and return your lips to his. You tug at the hair at the nape of his neck, earning another deep groan from his throat.

“Fuck, Sweets,” he moans. “D’you even know what you do to me?” You giggle slightly, looking up at him with wide eyes as he stares blankly. “You don’t do you?” You go silent. “I’ve wanted this for so long, Sweets. Wanted you for so long,” James holds your jaw in his hand, ensuring you’re looking at him and only him.

“Why didn’t you say anything, James?” You ask while lost in the intensity of his eyes.

“Guess I was scared. I didn’t want to ruin what we have,” James looks almost shy. “I care about you too much, Y/N.”

“What changed?” you ask. “Why now?”

“It was killing me, Sweets. Watching you talk about other guys, the idea of you move on without me. I couldn't let that happen without giving it a shot.” your tears threaten to spill, but you keep yourself collected.

You reach your hand to his face. “I’m glad you did,” you stroke your thumb across his cheek and lean in, tentatively brushing your lips against his. You close the space between you, nipping at his lip.

You feel his hands wrap around the backs of your thighs and lift you off the small counter. You cling to James’s shoulders as he carries you, giggling into the crook of his neck. Your breath tickles his skin. His hands feel warm against your marble-cooled ass as he walks you over to the mahogany dining table.

He sits you down at the head on the large table, talking care to be quiet. He presses between your legs and lifts one from behind the knee to get closer to you. He slowly lays you on the table, still holding your leg up.

You begin to roll your hips slightly against his bulge, seeking relief. James groans, throwing his head back and you pull his face back down to yours. “James, I need you,” you breathe heavily. James responds with nothing but a smirk.

He kisses you again, quickly this time, before moving to your neck, leaving clumsy dark marks in his wake. He makes quick work of your shirt, playing with the hem a bit as he looks back into your eyes. “Is this okay?” He asks.

“Yes,” you say breathlessly. “Jamie, please,” you beg. He begins lifting your shirt off your chest while you sit up a bit to make it easier. You lay back down, chest exposed to your best friend, who pulls away enough to take in the sight of you. You reach up to feel his arms planted on either side of your head. You feel heat rush through your body as he stares at you with a piercing intensity.

“Merlin, you’re so beautiful,” he says, knowing words can’t convey the intensity of his emotions. He lowers himself back to your neck, where he begins placing urgent kisses. His lips graze against the sensitive skin behind your ear, his warm breath tickling your skin. He slowly trails his lips down your body, leaving darkened marks behind across your neck and chest. He inches closer and closer to where you need him most.

He’s kneeling on the hardwood floor, head level with your cunt when he looks up at you with a ravenous look in his eyes. He loves seeing you like this. “Do you want this?” James says hooking his fingers beneath the waistband of your shorts.

“Yes,” you whine. Your shorts bunch up as he pulls them off along with your thong and tosses them away from you. James raises his gaze to your eyes with a sultry look in his. He hooks his arms under your thighs, spreading your legs open wide. He sucks and nips at your inner thigh, darkened marks left behind to prove he was there. He kisses closer and closer to your heat causing your back to arch slightly.

After what feels like an eternity, James dives in. He dips into you, licking a stripe through your folds. You let out a carnal moan and James runs a hand up your thigh, to your stomach. “I want to hear you, Sweets, believe me, but we’re in my parents’ dining room,” James says, savouring your taste.

He slides his tongue through your cunt again. “You taste so sweet, love,” his voice reverberates through your pussy, sending shivers down your spine. He flicks his tongue across your clit repeatedly, arms hooked securely under your thighs.

“You’re soaked,” he admires. He licks through you again, now pumping his fingers into you. You arch your back, a moan ripping through you that you try to muffle, hands tugging on his dark curls. His long fingers curl inside you, hitting exactly the right spot while his tongue ravishes you.

He swirls and flicks his tongue around your sensitive bead, fucking you with his fingers all the while. Erotic curses and stifled moans slip past your lips. With every tug on his hair from your desperate hands, James would moan, sending vibrations through your core. The knot in your stomach that you'd only ever dreamt of James Potter tying, began to tighten.

“Jamie,” you hiss.

“Hmm?” He moaned into your cunt. The knot tightens.

“James!” You cry out. He pulls away immediately. The climax that was just about to wash over you, drifting away.

“Sweets, are you okay?” He looks at you concerned. You brush some of his sweat-stuck hair off of his forehead, smile, and nod.

“I need more of you, James,” you plead. James licks his lips and tastes you again, savouring every drop.

“Are you sure, Sweets? If you’re not sure then-”

“Jamie,” you interrupt. “I want you to fuck me.”

James stands and wraps your legs around his waist, then your arms around his neck as he lifts you off the table all in a smooth motion. You giggle as James walks you to the staircase, hikes you up a bit, and carries you up the stairs. He walks past the door to his room, with Sirius’ beside it, down the hall a bit to your room.

He playfully but still gently tosses you onto your bed. While he turns around to close your door, you inch up to the pillows, not-so-patiently waiting for him to return to you. When he turns back to face you, his cock twitches in his pants. He’s sure he must be drooling at the sight before him. He removes his pyjamas and boxers at once, thick length finally freed.

He strides across the room to you, placing himself between your legs, he rushes to kiss you again. Frantic, sloppy kisses are all over your neck and chest when he positions himself at your entrance. He looks into your eyes again, waiting for confirmation. You eagerly nod your head. He slides the tip of his cock through your slick, brushing against your clit, sending a wave of pleasure through your body.

He pushes his cock into you gently at first, stopping before halfway, giving you time to adjust to him. His eyes are on you, checking for any signs of discomfort. You nod again, wanting him to keep going. He pulls out a bit and sinks back into you. He does this a couple of times before bottoming out with a groan.

He pulls out and buries himself into you, eyes locked on yours. His hands steadying himself on either side of your body. He’s so gentle, almost irritatingly gentle. He pumps slowly in and out of you, every whimper or whine you release is encouragement for him. He begins to push in deeper and faster, interlocking your fingers with his and pressing your hands into the bed. You grip his muscular arm with your other hand, nails digging into his skin to leave marks.

He takes your leg, lifting it to get a better angle as he pounds into you. The new angle makes your thoughts blur and a wave of pleasure washes over you. “James, ohh fuck!” You cry out. He pulls all the way out, leaving you gasping and clenching around nothing. The sight drives him wild.

He grabs your ankles, placing one on each shoulder. He strokes himself a couple of times and lines himself up at your cunt. He sinks back into you, his brows furrowed in pleasure. With your legs over his shoulders, his cock hits exactly the right place deep inside you with each thrust. You’re completely at his mercy as he pounds into you relentlessly. You feel your orgasm approaching when James slides out again.

He deftly flips you around so you’re lying on your stomach and he pulls you backwards onto your knees. He leans over your back, kisses your neck and shoulders, and then sits back on his heels.

He presses a few kisses to your lower back while gripping and squeezing your ass. You look over your shoulder and see James, beautiful as ever, glowing with a sheen of sweat and lust. Your admiration is interrupted by his sudden thrust into you. A guttural moan tears through you.

James continues gripping your hips, pounding into you at a merciless pace, fucking you dumb. He only slows to fuck you deeper. You arch your back and James moves his hands onto your ass, gripping and moving you against him. Unintelligible curses and moans flow freely from your mouth, emboldening his movements.

He reaches his arms around your body, lifting gently until your back is flat against his chest. His lips move to your neck, one of his hands to your hip, and his other to your tits. He’s so close to you. In every way someone can be close. You’ve never felt such bliss.

His hand snakes around your waist, moving to your clit, rubbing urgent circles on your sensitive bead. “J-James! ‘m so close,” you falter with each slam of his hips.

“Fuck,” he moans. “Say it again,” he says with each thrust.

“James! ‘M gonna cum,” you cry out his name again. He pushes your chest back to the bed, joining you as he presses his body against your back.

“You’re gonna make me cum, screaming m’name like that,” he thrusts deeper somehow. His lips return to your neck and his fingers to your clit.

“James, I w-want you to cum inside. I want all of you,” you say between moans. He groans against your neck and pushes your legs a little wider with his knees. He continues the abuse on your clit as his pace grows sloppy. His cock repeatedly hits the perfect place inside you.

You’re close and you both know it. James fucks you until you’re in pure ecstasy. The wave of your orgasm crashes into you, washing away everything but James.

James pumps into you a few more times, slower but harder and deeper. You feel his warm cum release inside you. He slows his pace and stops, his chest still pressed over your back. He kisses up your neck to your ear.

“You okay?” He whispers. You nod in response. “I’ll be right back, love,” he presses a kiss to your cheek and gently pulls out of your pussy, your combined fluids leaking out onto your leg. You hear the door open and close. In a blissful haze, you lay down on your side, and shiver at the sudden cold air against your body. The door opens and closes again. There’s a weight on the bed, a kiss on your cheek, and a sudden tickle of a washcloth on your legs.

James cleans you up and peppers kisses all over your body. He helps you under the blanket and joins you, of course. Your back is leaned against his chest and his hand snakes around your waist, rubbing gentle circles into your skin. “Are you sure you’re okay, Sweets?” He asks again. You turn around in his arms so you’re face to-face with him.

“I’m really good, Jamie,” you smile at him, moonlight barely illuminating his features. Your hand reaches to his cheek. You press your lips to his softly but passionately and smile into the kiss. You pull apart and cling to his shoulders like he was keeping you alive and he pulls you tighter against him. You drift into a comfortable sleep wrapped in his arms.

✫✫✫✮✫✫✫

You roll over to get the sun out of your eyes when you smell him. A homey cinnamon scent. “Jamie?” You say groggily, eyes not yet fully focused. When they focus, you see an indent in the pillows and sheets where James had been. You extend your arm and hope to feel some warmth you’d hoped he’d left behind. Instead, it’s cold.

You wonder what time it is, so you look at the clock on your nightstand. One of James’s T-shirts sits folded on top of the clock, covering the time. You sit up and lift the shirt off the clock, revealing a pair of his trunks and a note. For Sweets. The note read. You dress yourself in James’s clothes and a pair of trackies. You walk down the hall and to the stairs.

Monty and Effie sit at the dining room table. “Do you want this?” James says hooking his fingers beneath the waistband of your shorts. You remember James's words from the mahogany table the night before.

James and Sirius sit on the couch, watching the telly. Worried about if or how James wanted to go about telling your friends what happened, you sit politely next to James with a respectable amount of distance between you. You look at the boys and see James frowning slightly. He wraps his hands around your waist and pulls you toward him, draping his arm around your shoulders. You lean into his embrace, no longer worried.

Sirius clears his throat. “Finally!” He covers his jab with a cough.

“Oi, I did it, didn’t I?” James rebuts.

“Only after I begged you to stop moping and make a move!” Sirius cries out. You can’t help but smile at the bickering of two of your favourite people. They continue back and forth for a while when the doorbell rings. They don’t stop bickering.

You hop off the couch and hurry to the door, where you see Marlene standing out in the snow. You pull the door open and erupt into your ecstatic greetings. That was one of the best things about practically living with the Potters, Marlene's parents’ place is only two doors down.

“Happy Christmas Eve!” You yell together. “How have you been, darling? Has something happened?” She asks eyeing you.

“W-what do you mean, Marls?”

“Well, I mean…” She tugs at the waistband of James’s boxers poking above your trackies and the sleeve of his large shirt.

“Right…” Heat rushes to your face. Marlene looks at you with an inquisitive smile on her face. “We slept together, is all,” you shrug trying to remain nonchalant despite the butterflies in your stomach when you think of last night.

“Darling, you shagged the man you’ve loved the entire time I’ve known you!” She almost shouts. You rush to shush her, not wanting the whole house to hear Marlene’s theories.

“I don’t love him, Marls,” you insist. “I mean I do, but I’m not ‘in love’ with him!” The look on her face is incredulous. Marlene’s eyes flash behind you.

“Speak of the devil!” Marlene goes to embrace James.

“Only bad things I hope,” James stands behind you, hand snaking around your waist. “You should say ‘hi’ to Mum and Dad,” James tells Marlene with a hand stroking along your arm. She narrows her eyes but goes to greet the Potters anyway.

Once she is down the hall, James’s lips are on your neck. He wraps his arms around your waist and pulls you close to him.

“Jamie?” You ask, turning in his arms to face him. “What are you doing?”

“What do you mean, love?” He brushes some hair out of your face.

“Us? I mean, what are we doing, James?” You’re looking into his big hazel eyes and suddenly the smile on his face drops.

“Well, I thought… That y’know,” his usual confidence seems shattered. “We’ve been circling each other for so long, I just thought maybe it was time.”

“James,” you say seriously.

“Yeah?” He looks like a deer in the headlights.

“I think it’s time too,” you reach your hand to his face and tenderly kiss his lips.

✫✫✫✮✫✫✫

You take off your trackies and James’s shirt, leaving you in only his boxers. He turns down the comforters and climbs into bed, with a spot for you already carved out. You climb in and face him. Your breasts are pressed to his chest and you feel his gentle breath on your face. You fall asleep listening to the sound of James’s even breaths in his arms again.

✫✫✫✮✫✫✫

Christmas morning comes with a gentle light through the curtains waking you slowly and softly. The warmth of James next to you creates a perfect cocoon of bliss. Your eyes flutter open and when your vision unblurs, you see James, lying peacefully asleep.

You roll over and start to sit up when James’s arm finds your waist. His muscular arm effortlessly pulls you back to him. “Mmm, five more minutes, Sweets?” he mumbles. You roll back to face him and play with his hair mindlessly while admiring his features.

When you both decide to get up and go downstairs, it’s been much longer than five minutes. The sun had already risen despite the clouds that darkened the sky. You trample down the stairs hearing the commotion of the elder Potters and Sirius.

“The lovebirds are finally awake!” Sirius yells when you trample down the stairs. Euphemia squeezes Fleamont’s hand, sharing a knowing look.

“What time is it?” James asks.

“Past 9, Prongs. It’s well past time for gifts!” Sirius exclaims, shoving a box in James’s arms as he sits down. He places a box gently in your arms, he always has a soft spot for you. “Now which ones are mine?” He rubs his hands together mischievously.

“Sirius, grab that one with the candy canes,” you say pointing to a gift beneath the tree. “It’s yours.” James hands a gift to each of his parents, and you all begin to unwrap.

Sirius opens his with a gasp. “You got me Bowie?!” He squawks, holding his newest album, ‘Let’s Dance’. “You are so lovely, y’know that?” He leans over holding your shoulders. You shrug and smile with the satisfaction of a gift well-gifted.

The morning ends with a mountain of gift wrap on the floor and smiles all around. You gather your gifts and walk upstairs. You open your door to find James already sitting out your bed, with a small box laid in his lap.

“I have one last thing for you, Sweets,” James reaches out to hand you the box, which you take as you sit next to him.

“Jamie, you didn’t have to do that,” you playfully scold.

“I know, but I really wanted to,” he says with a wink. You open the box to reveal a small charm bracelet. Not only any charms but miniature candies. Sweets. You hold the bracelet in the light, admiring each charm.

“Oh, Jamie!” You wrap your arms around his shoulders. “The sweets! I love it! Do you think you could put it on for me?”

“Of course, Sweets.” You stick your wrist out and he clips it shut, his thumb tracing small circles on your skin. You admire each charm decorating your wrist.

“Merlin! Are these little lemon drops?” Your mouth is agape. They’ve always been your favourite, since back in Hogwarts. The little yellow pearls that earned you your nickname.

“Yeah, of course! It wouldn’t be a bracelet for my Sweets without lemon drops,” he says with a genuine tone. You breathe out a laugh. “What’s so funny?” He asks.

“‘Your Sweets’” you quote. “I’ve just wanted this for so long, it doesn’t even feel real,” you shrug.

“It’s real, Sweets,” he reassures. “It’s never been so real,” he takes your hand in his. And you raise your other to his cheek, bracelet charms jingling with your movement. You meet each other's lips, savouring each moment. “Happy Christmas, Sweets.”

“Happy Christmas, Jamie,” you smile against his lips.

dividers by: @enchanthings

#james potter x reader #marauders fanfiction #harry potter #x reader #james potter #background wolfstar #background dorlene

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slaaverin · 2 days ago

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Your post on Jikooks love had me crying, that was really beautifully put.

I have been unable to really express why their love draws me in, why I think it’s so true and beautiful

You’re right, it is hard to put it into words that do it any sort of justice. There isn’t a simple way to describe it, to simplify what it is we’re seeing. It’s too much, too large, and yet it’s also not. Because they simply love, they love each other. I know they are on the world stage and are only accessible to us because of that, but they just love each other. So much so they do allow us to see them, because they are entwined in a way, but it’s also purposely done sometimes, because I imagine they want us to see them sometimes, and be in control of that. I get it.

The kind of love they have I actually don’t think we see anymore, the only famous equivalent maybe is Tom and Zendya, the best friends type of love, where that person is your everything. It’s rare I think, that sort of love, but Jikook have it. I’ve seen posts from people who can’t imagine this sort of love, I think that’s where the doubt comes in for many people. But they have it, and it’s real.

It’s all in the way they look at each other, the love in their eyes, still ever present. The flirting, the need to touch, the support, the championship of one another, the bickering, the unwavering strength and devotion they have. Who has that anymore? As I said it’s rare

Their love is just so beautiful, and I am so grateful to them we get to witness a small fraction of it, because then, maybe the world can heal a small amount.

Beautifully written anon 👏🏻

I know they are on the world stage and are only accessible to us because of that, but they just love each other. So much so they do allow us to see them, because they are entwined in a way, but it’s also purposely done sometimes, because I imagine they want us to see them sometimes, and be in control of that. I get it.

As you said their love is a rare thing and I would imagine that if I held a love such as theirs, I would inevitably feel a pull to share it. When people are in a certain type of love they kinda want to scream it from the rooftops sometimes, I guess from the sheer joy of it.

We've got so much footage of them over the span of 10 years, so many close-ups and moments, it would be inevitable for us to not notice something, and they must be aware of that. This is a huge part of themselves, and it is engrained in many bits of their lives, so it would be very hard to hide. Lying and hiding also takes much more effort than being yourself, so I guess they took the best out of both worlds.

Jimin & Jungkook have shared a lot since the group came to be, it became natural for them as it did for the other members. They are people who, on top of being their job, like to be giving to others. So I feel in a way it is it an act of generosity for them to be so open about it.

I think they know about their fans, the jikookers, and how supportive we are. They know their relationship makes a lot of people happy. And they want their fans happy. The support is pretty encouraging for them to being themselves even more.

It might be a self-centered thought, but I've felt AYS was a gift specifically to us. A loving, thankful gesture (of course it was for themselves first).

It was nice how they let themselves be open, but also could control the narrative with the show. It worked brilliantly.

I think you are right, a small part of the world is healing thanks to them 💜 they fill our hearts with warmth and joy and love, and they give such good examples for people to follow. It is truly inspiring.

I'm always in awe because they shine so brightly and intensely, I feel humbled to witness their journey as humans. And I'm glad they get to share this beautiful love in this lifetime and truly get to enjoy it 🥺

Thank you for your beautiful words anon 💜 I think we understand each other 🫂

#jikook #kookmin #jimin #jungkook #ask

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yurinaa-world · 2 days ago

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could I request dr ratio, aventurine x reader that's like Ryo yamada from bocchi the rock? (She's like a bassist and lives with a wealthy family but never has any money because she spends it all on instruments. She occasionally eats weeds to get rid of her hunger. Despite her expressionless exterior, Ryo is an eccentric girl with a mischievous sense of humor, coming across as a person who likes to mess with others. She's fairly tactless and is happy to be called a weirdo.) Thank you!!

"𝓘𝓯 𝓽𝓱𝓮𝔂 𝓫𝓸𝓸 𝔂𝓸𝓾, 𝓘'𝓵𝓵 𝓰𝓲𝓿𝓮 𝓽𝓱𝓮𝓶 𝓪 𝓫𝓸𝓷𝓴 𝔀𝓲𝓽𝓱 𝓶𝔂 𝓫𝓪𝓼𝓼"

💫𝒞𝒽𝒶𝓇𝒶𝒸𝓉𝑒𝓇𝓈: Veritas Ratio & Aventurine x Gender-Neutral reader

💫𝒮𝓎𝓃𝑜𝓅𝓈𝒾𝓈: with a reader that's like Ryo yamada

💫𝒲𝒶𝓇𝓃𝒾𝓃𝑔𝓈:

💫𝒱𝑒𝓇𝒾𝓉𝒶𝓈 𝑅𝒶𝓉𝒾𝑜 "𝑀𝑒𝓂𝒷𝑒𝓇 𝑜𝒻 𝓉𝒽𝑒 𝐼𝓃𝓉𝑒𝓁𝓁𝒾𝑔𝑒𝓃𝓉𝓈𝒾𝒶 𝒢𝓊𝒾𝓁𝒹"

ugh! You're like a complete and utter toddler, it’s like he’s your babysitter and your lover. He loves you, he’s, even though you almost make him sigh at your antics. The sass gets worse and more unhinged whenever you try to mess with him.

he even goes as far as to grab the top part of your hair and shake you around a good couple of times or even rub and mess up your hair, so you start whining about it.

Did I tell you he can tell through your exterior? The way your hands move, if your eyes scrunch up or even your cheeks are a more different colour than it usually is. (He probably has all the information in a notebook and memorizes it in his head).

Watching you gaze at him, and acting so nonchalant about what you're actually doing. You should know better. All while he’s reading a book. Truly now shame in the slightest of your actions.

even when he wraps his one arm around since his hand is occupied. But that doesn’t stop him from seeing your flirty gestures and how they seem to be getting bolder and bolder by the minute. Shameless

💫𝒜𝓋𝑒𝓃𝓉𝓊𝓇𝒾𝓃𝑒 "𝒯𝒽𝑒 𝒮𝑒𝓃𝒾𝑜𝓇 𝑀𝒶𝓃𝒶𝑔𝑒𝓇 𝑜𝒻 𝐼𝒫𝒞 𝒮𝓉𝓇𝒶𝓉𝑒𝑔𝒾𝒸 𝐼𝓃𝓋𝑒𝓈𝓉𝓂𝑒𝓃𝓉 𝒟𝑒𝓅𝒶𝓇𝓉𝓂𝑒𝓃𝓉"

mischievous? That’s utterly right up his alley of course! What’s the point in not having some little fun? There’s no point in just sitting around! He’ll do anything with you, no matter how risky it may be—as they say the higher the risk the higher the fun.

It makes it even better when it’s you, such a serious look on the outside, truthfully mischievous with pranks that people wouldn’t imagine coming from you.

He takes good care of you for sure. No eating actual weeds—maybe fake ones replacement for the real thing to be more healthy and sustainable for you, or just something delicious, to celebrate your wins for the day, and gift along with it. Can you guess what it is?

weird. He hates that word dearly, it’s such a subjective word to describe someone like you. If you're weird then he’ll also be called that. Weird is weird, even if he wears expensive things and indulges in luxury. You can’t say it’s fine either.

if you liked this, consider tipping me on ko-fi! it'd mean a lot!

#✧*:･ﾟ✧:･ Yurinna's Writing :･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧#aventurine x you #aventurine hsr #honkai star rail x you #honkai star rail x reader #star rail #star rail x reader #hsr x you #hsr x reader #honkai star rail #aventurine x reader #hsr dr ratio #dr ratio #dr ratio x reader #honkai dr ratio #veritas ratio #veritas x reader #hsr x y/n

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nerdygaymormon · 1 day ago

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I understand this may sound almost childish but how do you handle your emotions when upsetting discourse takes place in a meeting?

Just got out of Elders Quorum and while most of the discussion was held with good intentions, it started to dip into good ol’ Holier than Thou ‘but not really’ and more particularly referencing a Seminary Q&A panel question with the answer of ‘Mastery of self’ comparing Being LGBTQIA+ is just as much a matter of Self Mastery as any other struggle (Cis/Hetero attraction and porn brought up as The Same)

While I had suspected it to take that turn, I knew I was too emotionally charged in the moment and didn’t speak up for the sake of not rocking the boat in turbulent waters so to speak, despite having several ideas to deepen discussion (as well as time running out) . Especially with the debate as to come out then and there to Make a Point. But more importantly and impactful of the point of “Let’s Ask Questions” instead of Push out Guidance

There were some more compassionate voices that soothed it somewhat but I don’t know how to handle it as of the moment. Should I bring it up again in the future?

Do you think it’s just an age/experience thing? Where as I get older I’ll have a better grasp on myself?

Oof, that's tough.

The idea that they're comparing being queer to being cis/hetero is rich because the LDS Church encourages people to act on being cis/hetero and rewards them, while telling queer people that being queer is alright as long as you don't act on it. If queer people were treated the same, had the same teachings that we'd be rewarded in heaven, then that would be an apt comparison, but this is not the reality we live with.

It's especially hard to be in discussions like this when you're not out of the closet. For one thing, people feel free to share their hot takes when they don't think there's any queer people present. Another is that being in the closet makes it difficult to speak in response, being able to speak openly as a queer person gives you a certain power.

When I was in the closet and those types of lessons happened, especially when I wasn't expecting a discussion on LGBTQ topics, sometimes I just didn't have the spoons to speak up. I would keep my head down, or at some point I would get up and leave the room.

Even as someone who is out, these types of impromptu conversations in a lesson are difficult. Once, instead of speaking up as the lone queer person, I instead spoke to the bishop afterwards about the comments made and the problems with them. He asked what I wanted done to correct the situation and offered several proposals.

To be a queer Latter-day Saint means to be resilient. Here's a few ideas on how to build your resilience:

Build a group of friends you can talk to about these things. Other queer members are good for this, and they can be online or irl. It helps a lot to be understood.

Counter the negative things said about queer people, even if it is just you telling affirmative things to yourself. Do not let negative words go unchallenged because the subconscious has a way of accepting those things.

When I hear things like that, I think to myself these 3 questions: Does that sound like the God I know? Do these words fit with the two great commandments about love? Do I resemble the queer people they're describing? So often the answer to all 3 of these is a resounding NO and I know I can ignore what they're saying.

Think about ways you can respond in the future so that you're prepared. One that I love is if the question is asked "What is something evil that people today consider good?" Raise your hand immediately and without waiting to be called on blurt out "Homophobia and queerphobia" as that makes it uncomfortable for others to say gay marriage or being queer is evil. Here's a few more phrases you can have ready: "These are real people you're talking about, would they feel welcomed and loved if they were here today?" "When I face my maker, I don't think it'll be said that I loved people too much, so I'm going to err on the side of love." "I'm commanded to love my neighbor not my church."

Being in that situation can be anxious and stressful. Learn some breathing techniques that can help calm your body..

I think one thing that makes it difficult to be in these situations as a closeted person is often we haven't experienced queer joy. Being queer shouldn't be defined by only pain or trauma. Queer joy is different than Pride, by which I mean it's not a big celebration, but often is small things such as having a queer friend, eating cake at the wedding of a gay couple, the satisfaction at seeing queer people in a leadership role, learning about queer history and the many ways queer people have worked to make life better, when you embrace the freedom to dress and be yourself, when someone gives you a compliment related to you being queer, and so on.

If you have access to therapy, I recommend it. If you're a college student in the US, your student fees likely cover access to see a therapist on campus. If not, perhaps your insurance will cover sessions with a therapist. The university where I work offers therapy to the community at a discount rate, it's a way for those who aren't licensed to get hours while being supervised by a professor.

Straight Mormons cannot effectively teach what queer Mormons actually experience. Those who aren't close to a queer family member or friend cannot speak knowledgably. Unfortunately most LGBTQ Latter-day Saints have been pushed out and aren't available inside the church and collectively the church is poorer for it.

Here's a novel thought, I wish they would focus more on presenting the actual message and teachings of Christ, what a different world this could be.

#queerstake

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miwiheroes · 2 days ago

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so i truly believe that byler will be endgame. but one thing that still confuses me is the talk between mike and el in the grocery store. what was the whole point behind it and how does add up to mike liking Will if he's trying to explain that he loves el in some weird mike way? you get what i mean? it just doesn't make any sense in my head. so do you have any explanation for that whole conversation?

Hi! Thanks for the ask

I actually really think this scene is a very queercoded scene. So now Mike is actually trying to apologise to El for the things he's done over the past season. He's trying to tell her that he loves her, but he physically can't bring himself to say it. When I first watched this scene, I originally thought that makes sense since he's just a teenage boy and their relationship is played with some humour anyways. But now that we have season 4, it feels like this is a bigger issue than just this scene.

The reason for him not saying I love you to her is literally so hard for me to articulate, since I personally have never had internalised homophobia, but the best rendition i can ever really get is literally from a video by the Daniel Howell from epic duo Dan and Phil (yes, really): So if you're interested in why he can't say it to her due to internalised homophobia, watch this video at from timestamps 18:08 to 18:44.

I honestly don't believe it was him being too scared to admit it, I think it was him being to scared to say it. As if he'll know he's lying as soon as he says it. And I know this because he tries to get her her to say it instead. As if the words are dirty in his mouth.

It's a pretty strange thing to do to write such a conversation in a heavily frustrating manner as this one. It's meant to frustrate the viewer, it's meant to mirror what Mike's feeling. And how is that a characteristic of an endgame couple? It also just shows that they simply aren't on the same page. They don't really get each other.

When El doesn't understand, Mike tries to drag it out as long as possible until they get interrupted. When they do get interrupted by the walkie talkie, he POUNCES on that shit, very happy for an excuse to get out of it.

As for the details of the conversation itself, they are very interesting.

Mike describes the feeling of being 'in love' as something that 'old people say to each other'.

This shows that he views being in love as something that is just part of growing up. He views his relationship with El as something he has to do in order to not be a kid anymore. He emulates his parents' relationship, which might I add, is loveless. So he copies what his parents do, which is saying 'I love you', despite not meaning it.

Right after saying this^^ he says that you eventually get girlfriends, so it's pretty clear that he thinks that in order to not be seen as a kid, he needs to get over Will and just be with a woman. Mike is in a relationship for reasons other than love, just like his parents.

ALSO THIS WHOLE CONVO IS PROOF THAT HE AT LEAST USED TO LOVE WILL DGASJHD

In his words, he describes love as something that 'makes you crazy' and tries to get El to understand through that. And may I harp on about the fact that Mike says to Will they should just go CRAZY together hello??? And Will, in that scene, instantly understands and agrees. It just shows that he views his feelings about Will as love, at least subconsciously, but this time is viewing it as something he needs to grow out of and replicate with El.

This is not even a parallel, it's more like a perpendicular. It literally showcases the exact difference between the two relationships through using the same words.

So yeah, that's what I think of that conversation between Mike and El. All in all, Mike can't actually say the words 'I love you' because they feel dirty to say when they aren't truthful, so he tries to get El to say it. She doesn't understand what he's saying because they aren't on the same page about anything. He tries to explain in terms he understands; his subconscious feelings about Will and the way that his parents say I love you to each other. He views his feelings about Will as childish and sees being with a woman as part of growing up, no matter if you're actually in love, all because of his parents.

<33

#byler #byler endgame #byler nation #mike wheeler #will byers #stranger things #byler evidence #byler proof

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dragonflight203 · 3 days ago

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My latest DC Comic read is Batman: Fear State Saga.

I picked this one up because Jonathan Crane is the main antagonist and I love the awful little man. I wanted to see how the comics portrayed him.

I can’t say this is good comic, but I enjoyed it. The only apologies I can make for the length is that I enjoy characters that are awful people and this comic is filled with them.

Comic

Title: Batman: Fear State Saga

Author: James Tynion IV

Artist: Jorge Jimenez

Year: 2021

Overall Opinion

An interesting premise that falls flat but nonetheless has very interesting character moments.

The plot in general suffers because it doesn’t challenge Batman. For him, this is just another night of dealing with Gotham’s bullshit. That’s a valid angle in is own right, but the narrative plays out as dramatic moments that don’t land. You can’t have a grand success if you never feared defeat.

There are, however, fantastic character interactions. Any page Jonathan’s on is generally a good page. I also enjoyed Sean and Simon, but I suspect those are more controversial.

The Peacekeeper-01 and Miracle Molly shorts are also very good, probably because they’re introspective rather than grand plots. Characters seem to be Tynion’s strong point.

Art

In general the art work is fantastic. No complaints there.

There is a puzzling portion of Batman #115 where the art style notably changes. I think it might be because the focus is on Molly, but if so it didn’t work. It had me flipping pages forward and back to figure out what was going on.

On the other hand, I really enjoy how in the Miracle Molly short the art style for Mary’s life differs greatly from Molly’s. Good use of the medium to emphasize the storytelling.

General

Main Story

-I love the prominence of women through this story.

Most of the other DC comics I’ve read so far have only had one or two prominent women, typically in background supporting roles.

So having multiple women in this story, interacting with each other, is very refreshing. I hope more current comics follow this trend.

-“I believe in the new Gotham City” is a catchphrase throughout that strongly reminds me of “I believe in Harvey Dent”.

And just like the Harvey, the new Gotham City is doomed to failure because of the faults inherent in its foundations.

Gotham needs to avoid any movement where the motto starts with “I believe”.

-Bat symbols replace swear words. While cute, it’s also silly. This is the 21st century; just put the damn swear words in.

-The FBI acquires Jervis’ tech when he’s comprehended.

This feels vaguely likely a conflict of interest. It certainly gives the FBI a good reason to want Jervis to break out.

-Arkham is outright called prison. So much for a mental hospital...

Montoya: “He was a prison guard in the most corruptprison complex on the east coast! The word ‘Arkham’ is shorthand for ‘poorly run prison’!”

-The term “bat-family” doesn’t seem right in universe. It works as a meta term, but I don’t see the characters – especially not the members themselves – referring to the bats as that.

At best I’d prefer a term like “bat clan”.

-I also feel they were poorly used.

There are numerous group of the bat family and they’re frequently referenced throughout the story.

However, we see them actually doing very little. They don’t even get proper introductions. So having dramatic shots where everyone is present doesn’t feel earned. Why should we care about them in the context of this story?

They should have gone all in with giving the bat family roles or cut them out.

-Batman gets a few speeches that feel out of place.

There’s the one where he and Molly talk on the way to the Unsanity Collective base about how Batman feels and the one at the end with Jonathan about change.

I like the concepts! However, they feel “high level”, rather than personal. It’s how I would expect someone to describe a story rather than their life.

I’ll certainly take this over an emotionally constipated Batman, but I think they could have used a rewrite to make them more natural.

-Why is Jervis barefoot in Arkham? Why is everyone ALWAYS barefoot in Arkham?

-The Unsanity Collective feel odd in this story.

They wipe away traumatic memories so people can become their best selves. That on its own is debatable – there’s an argument to be made that your memories make you who you are.

And Batman does challenge Molly on this when she tries to use the bomb to force it on everyone! He manages to talk her out of it because people can improve even with traumatic memories.

But he also allowed the Unsanity Collective to operate freely before the story and continues to do so after. He doesn’t consider them a threat to the city.

If Batman fundamentally agrees with the Unseen Collective I can maybe see him permitting to operate on the principle that people can choose their own paths, but I’d expect more tension with them than we see. It just seems out of place that Batman allows them to operate so freely when they’re mind wiping people. That can be so easily abused.

Shorts

-The Peacekeeper-01 comic doesn’t quite fit between Fear State #1 and #2.

#1 ends with Sean freaking out and #2 picks up directly from there. The Peacekeeper-01 comic ends with Sean peacefully walking away from his father’s pub.

-The Peacekeeper story does an excellent job of showing how deeply rooted corruption is in Gotham.

Sean watches his cop father beat to death another cop to prevent him from supporting the DA in taking down the (corrupt) commissioner.

Later they go out for treats and his father explains how controlling evil to keep it manageable is a good and honorable thing.

Fighting against corruption so ingrained into society is an uphill battle.

-The Miracle Molly comic hits hard for how mundane it is.

The antagonist is real life – a spouse you’ve disconnected from, in-laws you don’t get along with, an unfulfilling job…

There’s no one thing that pushes Mary over the edge. It’s just the unforgiving daily grind. And I think nearly every adult can sympathize with that.

-It’s a strange choice to put Poison Ivy’s origin story in Gardener’s comic.

I’m curious if this is the first telling of it in current continuity, or if it conflicts with an existing telling.

Plot

-Simon Saint on Crane’s work: “It’s difficult to imagine creating a society trained to expect trauma – whose fear has become so ingrained and irrational that your theory could tip them over.”

Yeah, that’s Gotham. I’d call that Gotham on an average day, really. You don’t need to set this after the Joker war.

-“A-Day” – The gas attack on Arkham that Jonathan used to break out – is frustratingly vague.

It’s blamed on the Joker, but Jonathan uses it to fake his death. Given Jonathan told Simon that his absence from Arkham would need to be hid from Batman to prevent his interference, it’s not unreasonable to assume Simon was involved.

So did Simon do A-Day? Or did Jonathan take advantage of Joker’s attack?

If Simon performed A-Day and used Joker as the fall man, I doubt Joker is pleased. You’d think he have something to say about it. But he never shows up in the story.

And is Arkham gone? If so, will it be rebuilt?

It’s implied at the very end that Arkham was destroyed in the attack, but it’s never made explicit.

-There is something very funny to me that Simon’s solution to masked vigilantes is licensed superheroes.

Obviously the police can’t handle Gotham’s costumed criminals. Some kind of superhero is necessary. It’s just a matter of who they report to.

(Has Gotham forgotten that SWAT exists?)

-Taking over Oracle’s broadcast is a nice escalation of the plot. It shows old tricks aren’t the solution to this problem and that the villain is capable enough to beat the bats’ tech expert.

However, it’s never made clear who took over Oracle’s broadcast.

I initially presumed Simon, but given how badly he falls apart I don’t think it was him. Also, there’s some evil laughter in one of the later broadcasts that isn’t really Simon’s style.

That leaves Scarecrow. It fits his MO of spreading fear but I’m skeptical he has the technical finesse to pull it off.

This point is just.. dropped about halfway through. You’d think Oracle’s tech operations being compromised would be a major plot point throughout, but apparently not. There’s not even any resolution on if its fixed.

-Simon’s positioning of the peacekeepers to the public is clever.

He acknowledges Batman’s achievements – he took on the mob and much of the city’s corruption.

However, with his rise came the rise of costumed crime and he wasn’t enough to handle that. Hence the need for the peacekeepers.

(Again, is there a reason Gotham can’t implement a SWAT team? In some continuities they’ve had one.)

-The program's barely started and Simon's already creating a secret Peacekeeper. That's not promising.

-Batman gives Montoya a run down of the entire plot.

This would be more impressive if the story showed how he knew any of it. How does he know the Magistrate planted the bomb? Or that Peacekeeper-01 is dosed on fear toxin?

-You’d think Montoya’s line here is foreshadowing, but it’s not: “The people need to believe in something – all together. It’s the only way to break them out of this…”

Waste of a very good story hook. That would have been a great resolution to the story – inspiring people to overcome their fear by giving them something stronger to believe in. It’s always been a theme in Batman stories that he’s meant to inspire hope.

-Bruce is furious at Simon for giving Scarecrow power. Interestingly, if not for that he could have seen a future for them in Gotham.

Batman fighting magistrate robots: “There is no future for the magistrate in Gotham city. There might have been if you hadn’t been so careless.

“You gave one of the most dangerous minds this city has ever seen more power than he’s ever had before.

“This city is Scarecrow’s laboratory now. We’re all his test subjects.

“Are you listening, Saint?!

“I will make sure that this city knows whose fault that is…

...Even if it kills me.”

I wish this was followed up on more. What place could Batman see for the magistrate in Gotham? Did he welcome the additional support but oppose the execution?

-In Bruce’s mind, he sees himself as Batman.

Minhkhoa, however, sees himself in a suit – but still wearing the mask.

-The Unsanity Collective built a machine that absorbs trauma and didn’t expect Scarecrow to attempt to steal it?

They might actually be insane.

-Sean I know you’re being mind controlled but please don’t let the mad scientist experiment on you just because he called you a hero.

-The Unsanity Collective being vulnerable to Scarecrow because both of their mind tech is built off of Jervis’ work is well done. Both of those facts are established well before the reveal.

Also, as much as Jonathan wanted credit at the start of this story for his work I feel Jervis should also be submitting a claim. Everyone is using his work. Man could be rich if he got royalties.

-Jonathan shows off his plan to Batman, then promptly throws a hissy fit when Batman attempts to interfere. Jonathan, how did you expect that to go?

-Sean shooting Jonathan is rather funny. And then casually saying he’ll kill Simon, take his position, and possibly keep Jonathan around if he survives.

Everyone wants Jonathan and no one wants to actually deal with him.

Understandable.

-The resolution with Simon is very abrupt. The bat family just show up on his ship and say he’s being arrested.

Given how major a player he’s been in the story, I think this should have been fleshed out more.

-Poison Ivy is very calm about reuniting with herself.

That feels very convenient and because the plot demanded in it. Why would “Queen Ivy” whose all cynicism want to reunite with innocent Poison Ivy?

-Batman is wrong about Sean in their final fight: “Heroes save other people. You’ve only ever wanted to save yourself.”

Sean literally lost an arm and a leg saving two nurses during A-Day. He’s a shitty person, but I do think he genuinely wants to do good. He’s just… Had extremely poor guidance on what good is and is only starting to realize that.

He went from his corrupt cop father for guidance to Silicone Valley tech bro Simon to the Scarecrow. Jonathan is not qualified to mentor anyone in ethics.

It’s an odd thing for Batman to say, as this story pushes the narrative that people can change and choose to do better. Ghost-Maker is a primary supporting character. Sean has already shown willingness to sacrifice himself for others and Batman dismisses him outright.

-It’s a solid twist that Molly wants to set off the bomb as an Unsanity bomb.

The resolution, however, falls flat for me. Batman gives Molly his communicator so she can hear all the positive press about the night wrapping up. This is supposed to be touching but I don’t feel it.

I think it’s because of Batman’s lack of inner turmoil. This has been a long night, but it hasn’t challenged him internally. He still holds the same beliefs at the end of the night that he does at the start; it��s just been a longer night than usual of putting down crime for him.

To make it work Batman would also need to be swayed by the positive news. Perhaps Molly could have spent the night trying to sway Batman to the Unsanity Collective’s vision. He debates her, but is visibly wavering. When she tries to set off the bomb she tells him she knows he sees her vision; he shakes his head and puts the communicator on speaker. They listen to it together and Molly dismantles the bomb.

Batman’s the viewpoint character, so he should experience some growth during the story. Molly’s a good vehicle to do it and the bomb’s a fantastic opportunity. The writing just didn’t take advantage of it.

-Batman WOULD NOT take off his cowl in public. I’ll assume Molly knows his true identity, but Jonathan and Sean are RIGHT THERE and they do not.

-Jonathan agrees to behave when Batman takes him to the asylum so they can speak on the way over. Rather sweet. The Rogues want their bonding time, damn it.

Even more touching is Batman giving Jonathan a mask when he asked. I suppose Batman understands the importance of them.

I would love to hear the therapists opinion on it.

-How the fuck can Molly do time for other members of the Unsanity Collective? Does Gotham even pretend to follow the rest of US law?

-I’m glad Poison Ivy calls Garten out on creating a seed of her. That was an extremely creepy violation of her autonomy.

-Batman says Jonathan hasn’t evolved, but that isn’t true.

Jonathan normally uses fear toxin. He doesn’t use any for this entire story; he uses tech Jervis developed that Jonathan adapted for his own purposes.

I appreciate that Batman is trying to encourage Jonathan to move past his obsession with fear or at least redirect it, but he can do that while acknowledging what Jonathan has already accomplished.

Characters

Jeremiah Arkham

-Simon bribed Jeremiah for private conversation with Jonathan. Huh. Disappointing.

Ethics aside, you’d think Jeremiah would know this would end terribly. No ‘private conversation’ with a Rogue can have a happy ending for Gotham.

-According to Jonathan, Jeremiah is also always listening.

Given Jeremiah runs Arkham Asylum, that’s just practical.

-Credit to Jeremiah: He put Sean on probation for beating the shit out of Jervis.

Strike against Jeremiah: He should have fired Sean on the spot.

-So is Jeremiah dead or not? It’s never stated if he died during A-Day.

Jonathan Crane

-Jonathan thinks Jervis is smart! “He is a strange man. Childish, but roughly six times smarter than any of the usual costumed coterie in Gotham.”

-To create a fear state Jonathan will require “a good deal of burlap, straw, and rope.” Lol. Obviously Jonathan will be doing his lab work in costume, who doesn’t?

-Jonathan wants credit for his work. He’s sick of others using his research and taking the credit.

I wish more had been done with this. Given it’s the intro for the saga, you’d think it be a theme throughout. Maybe what drives Jonathan to turn against Simon, or at least referenced again at the end. But no, this is the only mention.

-Jonathan never sits in the conversation with Simon. He stands, walks around, crouches, leans over the table, but never sits.

It’s probably just artistic choice, but I read it as never viewing Simon as an equal. Sitting would imply this is a business conversation between two men of the same statute and Jonathan never considers Simon on par with him.

-I love that Jonathan has different speech bubbles when he’s the Scarecrow. That’s some extreme compartmentalization.

-Jonathan’s foremost priority is science, but if it incidentally causes some good he’s not opposed. It’s just not a priority.

Scarecrow on putting Gotham into a fear state: “But I hope on some level you recognize the truth. That what comes next is me at my most altruistic. That’s not why I’m doing it, of course. I’m doing out of scientific curiosity. But I sincerely believe Gotham will be better on the other side.”

-I’m cackling. Even before he goes Scarecrow, the papers are already refusing to publish Jonathan’s papers on fear.

-Jonathan’s speech to Minhkhoa is quite passionate. He also looks like a dork during it.

I want to see this man in an anime. You’d know he’d have the time of his life going over the top anime style.

-Of course Jonathan likes to refer to a straw man of abstract fear as a scarecrow.

-Jonathan may actually believe what he tells Sean: “I’m not a bad guy. I’m a doctor. It’s the city that’s bad. And I have the cure.”

Sean: “What’s the cure…?

Jonathan: “You are, my boy. You are.”

I think Jonathan may be genuinely fond of Sean. Not as a person, per se, but as a successful experiment.

If nothing else, I’m sure he’ll cackle with glee and second hand pride when he watches Sean give Batman hell in the future.

-Jonathan enjoys his games with Batman. All the Rogues do.

Jonathan: “I’ll admit, I forgot how fun this is. Keeping you outfoxed… I try to stay above the fray when I talk to my Arkham compatriots… But I can’t lie. It’s a fun game.”

-Jonathan bounces right back after failures. A true scientist – he just found one more way to not achieve his goal.

Jonathan as he’s transported to an asylum: “No. The fear was always there. I was just trying to do something productive with it. Next time I’ll do a better job.”

-Of course he tested his fear bomb on the handlers Sean assigned him because he’s a ‘responsible scientist’.

Jonathan, you awful little gremlin of a man.

Sean Mahoney

-I’m probably one of a handful of people that genuinely like Sean. Even the narrative seems to expect you to dislike him.

He’s objectively awful at the start– he defends his father’s corruption and he beats the shit out of Jervis when he’s an Arkham guard.

However, he does save the two nurses during A-Day. And he says throughout that he wants to save Gotham.

For most of the story Sean is malleable. He follows his father, then Simon, then Jonathan. He slowly becomes disillusioned with each,

It’s not until the end that he really comes into his own and starts to define himself. (Was he ever deprogrammed from Scarecrow’s influence?)

I think there’s potential there. Most likely as a villain, but I could see him as a hero with some work. Well, a lot of work.

-Sean: “I’ll show them. I deserve this! I paid my dues! This city owes me!”

Even on fear toxin, that’s a worrying level of entitlement. Maybe especially on fear toxin. Sean’s deepest fear… is not getting what he thinks he’s owed?

Simon Saint

-Simon is awful. It’s like he objectively knows what the right thing is, but can’t bring himself to follow through on it.

Simon: “We must have compassion for Sean, because he’s a young man being manipulated by a monster. We are a force for good in Gotham city. We want to save him, because we want to save everyone, and bring order to this city. But should that not be possible…

“The Peacekeeper-X armor’s adaptive nanotechnology cost 500 million dollars more than what Peacekeeper-01 is working with. Your weapons will tear through Sean’s armor like it’s tissue paper. And if this goes south, that is precisely what I expect you to do.”

-Simon is crying as he orders the Peacekeeper-X armor destroyed, but does it anyway.

Then he tries to delude himself Ricardo might be alive.

Does this man have any experience with combat?

-Simon does not handle stress well.

Simon after Ricardo’s death: “Gotham city is insane. It is filled with dangerous criminals, and they all should be destroyed. This city should be wiped off the face of the Earth!”

Simon as Sean and Batman fight: “I don’t understand. I spent so much money. Why isn’t this working?!”

Misc

-I can see why Ghost-Maker is so popular. He’s quite funny and plays off Batman well.

-Shout out to Montoya for being sensible. She knows how dangerous Jonathan is with his words and wanted him gagged.

-Garten doesn’t do much, but I enjoyed her. She’s another character that’s well aware of how she’s viewed and accepts her.

I do not, however, trust her. That business with Poison Ivy was not aboveboard.

#dc #batman: fear state saga #jonathan crane

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