#i love you and cherish you and i'm probably gonna cry now :''''')

[bengals-barnesbabe]

Legacy

Tee Higgins x Ochocinco!Daughter

Description: Tee's been dating one of his idol's daughter behind his back. What happen's when the reader breaks her dad's number one rule? How will Ocho react when he finds out?

a/n: I need to start writing shorter, but I physically can't. I hope it meets your expectations ♡

Word Count: 3.6k

Warnings: overprotective father figures, language,

Main Masterlist

♡.﹀﹀﹀﹀.♡

Over the last seven months you’ve been happier than ever. You got a promotion at work, finally moved out of your dad’s house and met him. You’d never felt a love like this, he made you feel things you couldn’t have imagined. He didn’t just care about you, he cherished your love, encouraged your goals, and helped you feel safe. Tee made you feel seen in the world, in his world filled with countless others that would give anything for his attention.

Falling in love with Tee Higgins was easy, hiding it from Chad Johnson was the hard part. 

Every Memorial Day weekend your dad throws a small family kickback. At first it was his way of welcoming the summer since us kids were out of school, now that we’re older he does it so we have an excuse to spend time together. This year it’s gonna be in Miami at his new condo and of course he invited all of us, including any plus ones that we wanted to bring. Funny enough Memorial Day falls on the 7 month anniversary of you and Tee being together. The coincidence of the two dates lining up is chilling. 

Your dad was the stereotypical black father growing up, he didn’t want his daughters dating anyone until 35. While that rule was broken days after him stating it, there was one he would lay his life on the line for. 

‘No daughter of his shall ever date an athlete, but more specifically a football player.’

Real funny coming from him, the legendary NFL wide receiver. It’s also funny that your boyfriend and your dad played for the same team with the same number. Yea you’re pretty much dead if he finds out.

Thankfully there may be someone that can help you.

Calling ‘Future Rich Wine Auntie’…

“Hello?”

“I'm in a crisis.” You huff.

“Oh look it’s my poor little sister crying for my help once again, what did you do this time y/n?” She snickered.

“Jicyra, you’re two years older than me.”

“..and wiser and more stable (financially and mentally).” She mumbled that last part, not very well though.

“Hey!”

You could hear her smirk though the phone. “It’s true, I’m not in my 2nd year of residency making no where close to the current average in your field.” Well she didn’t have to rub it in.

“I know but- look we actually do have a problem.”  

“I knew it, you broke your dishwasher.” She cackles.

“Oh my god, I did not break the dishwasher. Why do you say shit like that? I’m talking about Tee and dad.” You rolled your eyes.

“Oh.. wait you still haven’t told him?”

You sigh. “Not that it’s Tee, he knows I’m dating someone.” 

“ Just rip the bandaid off, no harm no foul.” 

“That’s easier said than done, Cyra.”

“Look all I’m saying is you’re making a really big deal out of nothing. Dad ain't gon do shit, plus he considers Tee a second son half the time.”

ੈ♡˳

After getting off the phone with your sister, you started to devise a plan to tell Tee about the party, but you didn’t get far when he ended up walking through the door less than 10 minutes later. “Baby, where you at?”

“In here!” You forced a smile onto your face as he engulfed you into his fresh cucumber scented body. Probably showered at the facility. “We need to talk.” You both sit.

His face dropped and he slowly released you. “What’s up?”

“It’s not bad, it’s just we need to change our 7 month plans a bit.” You kissed your teeth.

He lets out a breath of air he didn’t know he was holding in, “that’s it. Damn baby you had me thinking this was it.” 

“No, no of course not.” You lean over and plant a brief kiss on his lips. “I would never break up with you like that, or ever. Especially if you didn’t even do anything wrong.”

“I mean there was that one dream you had.” His mouth twitched up.

“I’m a very vivid dreamer, I can’t help that. And blame that bitch from the club who tried to get in your pants.” 

“Ok what’s this about then?”

“Remember those end of school parties I told you about?” He nods. “Well my dad has invited us to his next one. It’s memorial day weekend in Miami.” 

His face shifts in realization, “I guess it’s time to tell Ocho.” He surveys the way you chew on your lips and wont meet his gaze. So he grabs your hands, pulls you into his arms and kisses your head. 

“Hey, I got you. Everything’s going to be fine, knowing your dad he’ll make a joke about it, maybe threaten me then we can have good time.”

You look up at him, “you think so?”

“I know so, baby.” You smile and pulls his lips to yours.

ੈ♡˳

You arrive at Miami Dade two days before the party and without your boyfriend, due to him having an early practice the next day. The 3 hour plane ride gave you lots of time to think of a way to break your big news to your dad without him popping a blood vessel or setting anything on fire. You decided to just break the news to him as gently as possible, give him small details then let Tee speak for himself. Sure is putting all the pressure on him a bit harsh, yes. But he asked you out in the first place, so who’s fault is it really? 

A little over a year ago.

It was your first official week in Cincinnati when Danielle, a long time friend of yours, suggested that you join her at a party that the guy she was seeing was throwing. Being so new to the city, you took her up on the offer so you could meet people. When you got to the party, it was covered in orange and black jerseys and it dawned on you that this wasn’t just some party.

“Dani, did you bring me to a Bengals victory party?”

The dark skinned woman removed her coat and smiled. The number 1 printed on the white fabric made you scoff. “I knew if I told you he was a football player, you’d find an excuse not to come.”

“You’re dating Ja’Marr Chase?” The bright smile painted on her lips couldn’t be wiped off even if tried.

“Yes, it's been 3 months and I really like him, so please just stay.” So you let the woman lead you further into the party.

Let’s be clear, your dad’s dumb rule didn’t cause your destain for the football culture, it was the fact that your entire life was centered around the sport. Dad’s a legend to the team, brother played just like him and it’s all anyone ever talked about. You stayed away from sport all together, it didn’t help when you majored in Biology to be a physical therapist, but you weren’t actually watching them play.

The party wasn’t as bad as you expected it to be, granted you spent most of the time standing by the bar carefully nursing your drink, but the vibes were nice. You’d already met most of the players on the team through your dad and work, so you weren’t surprised when Tee came up to you.

“Dr. Y/n Johnson, I thought you said I’d never see you outside the office.” He smiled discreetly looking you up and down.

“Uno’s dating my best friend.” You said nodding towards the couple on the dancefloor. “She dragged me here without telling me it was for y'all. But I guess congratulations are in order, AFC champs.”

“Oh you know, just another thing to be thankful for, just like you in that dress.” 

“Flattery will get you nowhere Higgins, but buy me another drink and maybe I'll bite.”

“Anything for a few more minutes with your fine ass.”

ੈ♡˳

Minutes at the bar turned into hours on the phone then days just to see that charming smile, so yea flattery got him the world. 

Your phone buzzes knocking you out of your daydream.

Mean Ass Bitch: I've been in the airport pickup line for 10 minutes, where you at bitch?

LOML T💜: missed you when i got home mamas, call me when you get there 

You bite your lip hiding the grin that he put on your face as you click on his contact. It rings once before you hear that deep southern drawl come through. “There goes my baby.. How was ya flight baby?” 

There isn't a moment when you don’t feel the warmness in your chest and butterflies in your stomach when it comes to this man. The charm may have gotten him in the door, but it was his goodhearted, loving nature that gave him the key.

“Hi..it was good, I managed to get a nap in so that was nice.” 

“Only the best for my baby. How you feelin? I know your nerves been goin crazy.” 

Just as you were about to answer, you spotted your sister, your very mad sister. “Hold on babe, J looks like she wants to kill me.”

“All good, we can't have that. Call me when you can, I love you.”

“I love you more Tamaurice.” You smirk as you get to her car.

“You the only one allowed to say that, wouldn't be gettin away wit that shit if you weren't so beautiful.” His tone lacks the seriousness he implied as his light chuckles come through the phone.

“Sounds good to me, byeee.” You can’t help laughing as you hang up and put your bags in Cyra’s Audi. 

“I hope you ain’t laughing at me dying in this damn heat waitin for your slow ass.” She mean mugged as you ducked into the car. 

“Nah, it’s because you're dressed like goddamn big bird in that damn sweat suit.” You teased.

“I will kick you out of this car, quit playin’ bitch.”

“Okay, okay,” you sigh as she pulls out of the airport traffic. “So how’s my gorgeous real estate queen big sis doing?”

“You know what, I’m good. Charmin’ rich people outta they money for some last leg beach houses that’ve seen one too many hurricanes. I’m very excited to get on this boat with a glass of champagne and just relax.” You nod along as she turns the radio on. “How’s the Tee and dad situation going?”

You take a deep breath and sink further into the seat, “I’ve decided to just let his presence speak for itself. They already know each other, but ‘Tee the wide receiver’ is very different from ‘Tee the man that’s dating his daughter’. I’ll try and ease the idea of him before he gets here, there’s no way I’m taking all the heat from this.”

She scoffed, “you just gon’ let your man take the fall?”

“He has said he’d do anything for me, so it probably won’t be that bad.” You shrugged.

“Yea ok Y/n, I can’t wait to see this blow up in your face.” 

ੈ♡˳

Walking into your dad’s house felt like going through a time capsule, he only bought it a few months ago but the walls and shelves were filled with pictures of us as kids and football memorabilia. “Dad she’s here.” Cyra sings taking your bag down the hallway that you hope has the rooms.

You find him in the kitchen arms deep in hamburger meat. “Uh oh Docta Johnson in the house. Come here and give your old man a hug.” Shaking you head, you humor him as much as you can without touching his hands.

“How you doing old man?”

“I’m alive, I’m happy and I’m excited to meet this boyfriend of yours. Where he at, did you tell him to wait outside? Baby you know I’m good.” He smiles as wide as he possibly can.

“I’m glad to hear it, but he’s not here yet. He has work so he’ll be flying out tomorrow night.” 

He smirks. “At least he has a job.”

Your jaw drops, “that was one time and you said you wouldn't bring it up again.” He chuckles as a frown builds on your face.

“I’m just playing, but this guy already sounds ten times better than what his name.. Jackson! Yea he was a leech.” 

“Okay, that enough boy talk. Want some help there?” You ask gesturing to the mountain of meat on the marble counter.

“I would love some, you always were the better cook. But don’t tell your sisters I said that.” He nods with a hushed voice.

You chuckle walking over to the sink. “You just did.” His brows furrowed. 

“What do you mean?” Chade and Jicyra tapped his shoulders from behind him. He eyes whitened out.

“What I meant was that Y/n’s good with protein heavy meals. Cy you make a mean salad and Chae you make the best cookies.” He smiled.

“Nice try, I do be throwin’ some flour around tho.” Chade remarks.

“Whatever, we’re off to buy some supplies for the party. Bye!” Then its just the two of you, in the kitchen seasoning about 20 lbs of meat and forming it into decent sized patties.

“So is there anything else I can squeeze out of you about this fine young black man? He is black right?”

You scoff, “what if he isn’t, what’d you say?”

“None, nothing. Your hair look too good for you to be dating a white man.” Your jaw drops for the second time today.

“I can’t. I don’t know why I’m helping you.”

“Aww my poor middle child.” You shove his arm causing him to get raw meat on his shirt. 

“Ok, I deserved that.” He nods, side eying you. “Don’t even try it.”

“You no fun. Come just tell me something about the guy.” 

You bite. “Fine, yes he’s black. He’s tall, kind, smart, sweet and I guess he’s pretty athletic.”

He hums, “athletic huh. What we talkin here NBA, NHL, FIFA?”

“I ain’t giving you no more, you’ll see him tomorrow and I’ll let him speak for himself.” You finish your part then walked out of the kitchen.

“I can read in between the lines Y/n! If Ja’Marr walks in this house tomorrow, I’m beating his ass!”

If he only knew how close he really was.

ੈ♡˳

You ended going out to dinner with your sisters when they got back. It was fun it being just being them, you could gossip and chit chat all you wanted without Ochocinco lurking around. Before bed you and Tee talked all about each other’s day and all the nerves about him meeting your dad. He reassured you that there was nothing he couldn’t handle and nothing your dad could say that changed how he felt about you. It felt good going to bed knowing your boyfriend had no worries about your relationship changing at all.

The next day was pretty chill, dad was too busy with the last minute preparations for the party. So you spent most of your time at the mall with your siblings. Your brother pretty much just groaned about the heat and the amount of time you spent in stores, but you reminded him plenty of times that he could go off on his own and he chose to stay. With that said the four of you had a pretty nice time. Until the ride home, when you could not get away from the Tee questions.

“Don’t you think its weird that they shared the same number and team?” Junior spent 20 minutes just going over the similarities between them like you hadn’t already known how odd it was.

“Jr leave her alone. How’s his stamina though?” Chade was the youngest, as anyone could probably tell with her bluntness.

“No sex questions please, this is a rental and Jr’s not afraid to blow chunks.” Cyra joked.

“Yall act like I don’t have sex.”

“Ok so would like to know what Matt and I did at your New Years Party?” Chade smirked. 

He eyes just about fell out of his head. “You and Matt? Matt my best friend? YOU AND MY BEST FRIEND FUCKED AT MY PARTY?”

That was the end of the questionnaire.

ੈ♡˳

The second you pulled into the driveway you noticed two things: your dad’s SUV was still absent and there was another random car by the curb. 

“Who’s that?” Cyra shrugged in response and just motioned you to get out. Normally someone would’ve taken offense to be thrown out of a car, but then your favorite person in the world got out of the other car.

“Damn, he is tall.” Jr’s comment was deaf to your ears as you ran over to your boyfriend.

“Hey babygirl.” He smiled wrapping his arms around you.

“What are you doing here? It’s only 4 and you weren’t supposed to land until 9. You know what I don’t care.” He lifts you onto the trunk of the vehicle so you’re eye to eye and guides your lips to his. Another feeling you could never get tired of, his plump lips against your glossy ones. Your arms wrap around his neck in an instant to pull him closer into you. You love being able to relinquish all control and just let him move you how he sees fit. He pecks your tropical scented lips once more before helping you down.

“Well that is an image I’m never getting out of my head.” Jr shakes his head and takes your bags out of the car. 

“Let’s go in the house so Y/n can properly introduce us to her beau.” You stay glued to his side as you make your way into the condo. 

As Junior rounds the corner to the bedrooms he stops in his tracks and the bags drop onto the floor.

“JUNIOR MY PERFUME!” Chade shoves him and grabs her bags. “Oh shit.”

Cyra being in no mood for their nonsense, pokes her head down the hall. “What the hell is wrong with you- hi daddy.” You shoot her a panicked look. She responds with an equally panicked shrug. The situation is impossible, there’s only one way to the living room and its to pass that very hallway. 

“This is not how this was supposed to happen.” You whine at the lowest voice you could manage. Which didn’t end up being that low in the end.

“How what’s supposed to happen?” Your dad’s voice bellows out. Tee squeezes your shoulder as the man walks into your view.

“Surprise?” 

He sighs. “Damn, I owe Junior some money.” 

“I’m sorry, what?” You blink. All of sudden your brother bursts out laughing and starts dancing around your father.

“I told you! He had his mind set on you bringing either Ja’Marr or Burrow ‘as a wildcard’. I’m ten thousand dollars richer people.” 

“You bet ten racks on who she was dating! Dad I thought you were smarted than this.” Cyra expresses dumbfounded like the rest of you.

“Dad what the fuck? Is that why you wanted to know if he was black or not?” You rolled your eyes before walking past the man into the living room.

“Y/n it wasn’t like that-

“I don’t care, I’m just glad you lost your money to the dumbest person here.” 

His forehead creased, “Was that her way of calling me the new dumbest person?” Both of your sisters nodded. “Got it.”

Then Tee, still standing at the doorway, clears his throat. “Ocho.”

Your dad turns back towards him and pulls him into a ‘bro-hug’. “Well if it isn't the younger taller version of myself. I should’ve known it was you, not because of that but you didn’t exactly take your eyes off of her when she came down to that practice.”

Tee chuckled. “Couldn’t help it, man. I would’ve talked to you the last time you came to practice, but I was under strict instructions not to. When the love of your life tells you something, I make it habit to listen.” Chade nudges you as your face heats up.

“Love of your life huh? Glad to know she’s in good hands, and you have no excuses not to go for my records now. You got a physical therapist on speed dial.” They laugh together.

“See, I told you you were worried for nothing.” Cyra joins you on the couch. 

“Yea I gues you were right.” You mutter bringing a smirk to her face.

“I’m sorry what was that? Did The Dr. Y/n Johnson just admit that she was wrong.”

You pressed your lips together and got up. “You heard me or do you need an audiologist? Cause I can’t help you in that area, you’re just getting old.” You walked over to Tee, quickly grabbed his hand and ducked when a pillow came flying your way.

“Im only 2 years older than you bitch.” You cackled running down the hall to your room.

“Hey, no funny business in my house!” You shut the door and laid back against it trying to calm down while Tee sat on the bed studying you.

“What?” You walk over and stand between his legs.

“I like this side of you.” He sucks in his bottom lip scooting back on the bed.

“Yea, well I know a side you like even more.” You saying climbing onto his lap.

His hands go around your hips and cup your ass. “Oh I like this Y/n very much.” You push him back and place ghost kisses on his lips.

“Woman if you don’t- You go to give him a peck but lightly bite his lip instead. “Fuck.”

He closes the distance between you, sucking in your lips and licking into your mouth. 

Yea you had nothing to worry about at all.

♡.﹀﹀﹀﹀.♡

a/n: reblog if you like, comment or request any scenarios you'd like for me to write for our octopus lover♥︎

[duchessonfire]

CEGAN BINGO OFFICIAL MASTERLIST

This @ceganbingo has been a wild ride since it got started in April/May. A huge thank you to @ex0rin for coming up with this wonderful card and a huge thank you to everyone in the Cegan community who has supported me throughout this event.

This is my official masterlist, with an unofficial masterlist to follow someday because I aim on blacking out this entire card because all the prompts created by Cara are DELICIOUS. (Also, not gonna lie, I should have probably planned my squares better but it's okay because I GOT A BINGO IN TIME):

A Thing for Pathetic Losers (E, 42k, 3/3, no apocalypse AU, complete on AO3):

Carl has a thing for pathetic losers. Negan fits the bill until he doesn't.

Squares: Feminization, Daddy Kink, Leather Jacket

All That's Left After the End of the World (E, 116k, 9/9, Dead City AU, complete on AO3):

After Judith and Rick died during the fall of the prison, Carl has been separated from the original group for 15 years. Now a prostitute at the Easy Stay Motor Inn in Virginia, he believes he has finally found a life that suits him. That is until a strange man and a child walk in one day. Takes place in the Dead City-era but can be read without having seen the spin-off.

Squares: Free space (scars), Size difference, Whistling, Jealousy/Posessiveness, At least cry a little, Bruises, Hair pulling, Kneeling, Dirty talk

Strawberry Mama (E, 10k, 1/10, No apocalypse AU, WIP):

Carl is 24 and raising Judith and RJ by himself after the deaths of their parents. He has one eye, no degree, no prospect, basically no income, and now Shane is threatening to get a paternity test for Judith to boot. With so much stress in his life, the last thing Carl needs right now is for Judith to sneak out of the house so she can go see Negan, her country star idol touring around Georgia.

Square: Biting

Total: 168k written, 13 squares, 1 bingo

Special shoutout to @ladyshallots @jdeanmorgan @livefasteattrashh @lovelythunderstorm @reallygreatblogname222

@honestlydarkprincess and @stunt-lads for their cheer and support on and/or off Discord.

All my love and gratitude as well to everyone who sent me messages on Tumblr about my fics/commented on AO3. I am so so grateful to all of you, including but not limited to: @haggravated-lassault @obsesja94 @giantgnasher @besosderuina @candyvan

@nunc-spes-spei @pinkponydean @gwaylion (I'm sure I'm forgetting some people, but just know that I cherish, read and re-read and re-re-read all messages and comments sent to me!!)

Until next time ~

[lizzaneia-elizalde]

Another yandere set 2 ask, from yours truly! This is another one inspired by the yandere set 1 asks regarding fatherhood…

How would each of the yanderes’ react/behave during their darling’s labor and post-labor?

I wanna know who’s panicking, composed, excited, etc.

Sorry I got baby fever right now…

Yandere men and their darling in labor and post-labor

Assuming the reader this time is AFAB, or is in an A/B/O situation! By the way, i'm so sorry if i'm moving so slow with the requests! I've been busy lately so i'm trying my best to write.

"Why don't you just close the requests?" True, but some people use the ask box to talk and chat to me without compromising their anonymity. So, I hope you can be patient! I don't really like rejecting asks, so I probably will answer all of them. I know, I can reject them or not answer. I'm working on it lol. Especially that there's a lot of asks like these, which includes all the yandere OCs in a set... It's a bit exhausting. I kind of regret it, but hey, we're here already lol.

I added a section of... You'll know if you read HAHA

YAN! DELINQUENT

Liam will definitely panic. He's sweaty, he's smiling, he's about to blow off his top from the way the nurses were so nonchalant with your labor (It's normal). Can't they see you're about to die (You're contracting)?! Oh god, you can't voice out your pain without you talking (The midwives are not dumb enough to not read body language)! He will swear up and down that no more babies. NO MORE! It's already painful enough seeing you get swarmed by other people, let alone touch you.

Post labor Liam will be calm, fussy, and overprotective. Well, more overprotective than usual. He has a 70/30 chance of fainting, and will praise the gods if you delivered safely.

But, if you died... He will let out a gut wrenching cry by the foot of your bed. The baby won't even be noticed by him as he clenches his chest, sobbing and heaving his heart out. It will take more than days to calm him down, and have the heart to take care of your child. He will love the child, since he knows the child is innocent. But a big, gaping you-shaped hole in his heart is carved painfully in place.

YAN! BULLY

Uno will be the quiet panic-type. He sure is calm... On the inside. He's about to scream and rip the heads off of everyone who's touching you even a smidge wrong. NO MALE HANDS! NEVER! He's never been like this, ever. Even in your wedding, pregnancy, he never panicked. So why now? He's biting his cheeks to the point it bled, and you swore every single nurse and midwife in the delivery ward were yelled at by Uno.

Post-delivery Uno will calm down and act like nothing happened. "See? I know you can do it, nerd." Yeah sure. As if you can't see the blood stained teeth from him biting his cheeks. For the first time, he'll cherish a person other than you. He's so soft that it's new to you too.

If you died, Uno will turn the whole hospital up and down. He'll ruin everything, blame the midwives and nurses for not taking care of you enough, the hospital for lacking the resources to make a safe delivery.... And unfortunately, your child for killing you off. I'm gonna be honest, Uno will be the type to blame the child for your death. So, be healthy, darling!

YAN! NSFW ASMRTIST

Rose would be composed. He knew you were gonna be fine. Of course, nervousness will still be there, but he had enough trust in this hospital that he hopes you and your baby will be fine. That, and all of those breeding roleplays was his fault so he had to be composed since he brought it upon himself.

Post-delivery Rose would be relieved. He's right. And the cute little bugger is so small. He fits just by 3/4's of his arm. Wait, why is the baby so small? Are they really this small? But you were eating quite a lot... He's also a big guy, so the genes..? Is it from you? Or just recessive? He will have many questions. All those pregnancy asmr roleplays didn't really help.

If you died, Rose would feel like the whole world collapsed on his feet. What do you mean you died? He swears you would be okay. That you will be alive and well. He suddenly feels an immense guilt eating him up. Should he have panicked more? Should he have ensured the personnel that you're going to be alright? He sinks to his knees, weeping. He will swear on your body to take care of the baby well.

YAN! ISEKAI'ED ADVENTURER

Aeron is definitely skeptical. Sure, this world has magic, but it doesn't have the technological advancement of the modern world. It's also a world where he can't be with you in the delivery room. So all he could do is pace around the hall as he hears your cries of pain. He'll also cry with you if the delivery was too long for both of your likings.

Post-delivery Aeron will burst through the door and will go to you first. "Are you fine? Do you feel lethargic? Do you feel weak?!" The nurses have to pull him off of you so you can have the baby latch on you. He'll pout, but grips his arm as he watches you and the baby with a fond smile.

If you died... Aeron will regret everything. He knew he should have found a way back to the modern world. Maybe you could have delivered safely. He shouldn't have had a baby with you. A demon king's child will be too much on a mage's body, with all of those mana mixing. The whole hospital will be engulfed in demonic power as he suffocated everyone except his kid. He'll disappear with the child, forever retreating to the Demon realm to raise the kid alone.

YAN! PLAYER

Amor would be excited. He never thought he'll finally get a kid of his own after years and his past life. His parents spoiled him a lot, his guardian angels (gods) spoil him too. And this kid? A product of you and him?! Gods above! That's like, such a blessing! He'll be persistent in asking the nurses and midwives if the kid is there, if you're alright... OH god are you okay? All of these other people touching you... He feels the bile rising up to his mouth. But he knew these people are just doing their job, and then--

Post delivery Amor would be all over you. He'll kiss your face, your lips, your forehead, immediately buy you food you cannot have, and spoil you rotten as you recover. And his kid? Oh his kid is so cute! Look at them. So pretty and small... Is that his nose? Oh they got your eyes! His hair color and your hair texture... Oh they're the perfect mix!

This is one of the rare times were you are guaranteed on not dying... In the backstage, Amor shook the gods on putting so many blessings on your body to make sure your delivery will be safe and easy. That the child will be healthy. So, no deaths at all.

YAN! PARASITE

Acheron will be overly cautious one. He will have you deliver in your home, in his lab, where he transformed it to a delivery ward. He trained in birthing too, so he's as good as professional midwives too. He will be there for you, ensuring that the pregnancy will end well. Because honestly, technically speaking, this child is from this body of his and yours. Not your original body. So he's a bit conflicted.

Post-delivery Acheron is smug. He knew he could handle the delivery well. The baby is healthy, and he's planning on how to make the kid a parasite too. Which can earn your ire or approval, depending on what you want. But now, he's content, and actually loved this little kid, despite knowing the biological composition of the kid.

If you "died", Acheron will be filled with regret too. He wasn't skilled enough. He should've listened and admitted you to a hospital. He'll have to extract the parasite from your body and dump the body, and then find another body for you to inhabit. He'll have to nurse your parasite form to healthy levels first before letting you wriggle into a body. He will be a bit cold to the child though, but a bit more time with him will calm him down.

YAN! EMPEROR

Callisto will only have the best midwives. He'll be overbearing, making sure you WILL be alright. He will, for the first time, be religious and pass by the church to pray that your delivery will be safe. He will force himself in the delivery room. No matter what anyone says. He's the nervous type, biting his nail and barking orders if something even went wrong just a bit.

Post-delivery Callisto will be proud. He's not the type to freak out, he'll just feel the calm washing over him as he showers you with kisses, saying "you did so well", "thank you so much", "Take your time recovering", etc. The baby, he's more or less concerned since he knew the baby will be fine.

If you died though, he'll storm out of the palace, then to the church, and blasphemize the whole place. If he's the chosen one, then why did you die? Why did the love of his life slip past him? After hours of desecrating the church, he will be hell bent on revenge, making the church the enemy. His kid will be not loved, unfortunately. He will neglect them, only providing the bare minimum. Don't get him wrong, the kid will be the heir, but they have to prove himself.

YAN! COLLEGE STUDENT

Alpheus would be the type to be suddenly so overwhelmed with worry. Since he's never been one to feel, the sudden feeling of panic, dread, and worry settled in his stomach. He would probably lay down on the hospital floor, clutching his belly as he rocks back and forth. The nurses and midwives would have to fuss over him before you to the point that you're getting annoyed. He will have to be separated from you, or else he'll probably goes to shock when he hears your pained cries.

When you're done, he goes to your side, crawls beside you, and becomes a clingy mess. He'll apologize, kiss and nuzzle you. He can't believe he subjected you to such a painful ordeal. One child. Just one is enough. He can't have you (and himself) be in this situation again. But the baby is worth it.

When you die, Alpheus will for the first time, cry from grief. It's his first time experiencing something like this, that it overwhelms him. He CANNOT father your child. Unless some divine intervention happens and he'll be fine again. The child will go to his parents, and they'll hope that he'll recover, for the baby's sake and yours up in heaven.

YAN! DEEP SEA CREATURE

Viper's not a worrywart. Since you can't exactly go to the civilization to deliver your eggs safely in time, he would have to let you birth on what's akin to a nest. He'll be there with you, his hands all over your body as he whispers encouraging words to your ears. use his tail as a pillow, who cares. As long as you're comfortable and safe, everything will be fine.

Post-delivery will have Viper give one of his rare smiles. He massages you gently, telling you that you did great, feeding you food, and then fixing the clutch of eggs you birthed. He will have you asleep in no time to rest your weary body as he fusses over the eggs and making sure none of them are wrong.

If you actually died during the birthing process, there will be only two outcomes. If you came to him willingly and you weren't forced to love him, he would take care of the eggs diligently, not wanting to waste your life. If you didn't, let's just say a little cannibalism goes a long way with eggs. Viperfish caviar, anyone?

YAN! HUNTER

Orion will panic throughout your pregnancy. He really thought that he's gonna be the laidback type, knowing you'll be fine and whatnot. But noooo. Now he's here, pacing back and forth in the delivery room as he watches your face wince and cry from the pain. Oh, he almost can't take it anymore. He's begging you to get an epidural. He's really doing it. If you refused, he would shut up and look at you like a puppy kicked. But who cares about him rn? You're giving birth!

Post-delivery Orion will have him faint lol. He'll already wake up when you are cleaned up with the baby also cleaned up. He'll zoom past the nurses and midwives then go to you, where you held the baby up to your breasts to feed. He'll feel a much more overwhelming love in his heart, and he cries his heart out. If it's a clutch of eggs, he'll be starry eyed as he watched the eggs float in an egg incubator, eyes filled with adoration and gratefulness to you.

If you died, he'll be more or less in denial. No way, right? No way you just died like that after giving birth to your precious child/children. You just left them like that? You're so heartless. But deep down, he knew it wasn't your fault. And he goes home that day, eyes hollow, but filled with grief and love for your baby/ies.

YAN! KING

Soma would be pissy. Nobody should talk to him, or he'll blow his top off to them. You were giving birth! Can nobody understand that?! This is a crucial time that it needs his 101%, no, infinity percentage of his attention if that makes sense. He'll also break the rules and be inside the delivery room, letting you hold his hand and even break it. May it be from the pain or from you wanting to exact revenge. Who cares? He'll let you break it if it meant your comfort.

post-delivery Soma would be a lot calmer, and he'll immediately order the people to make you more comfortable, and treat you to make your recovery as fast as possible. Your kid will be given the best amenities, and made sure to have the best upbringing. Hell, he'll have the kid enrolled already and they only got birthed lol.

If you died, he'll be in a stormy mix of emotions. First, grief, second, denial, third, anger, and fourth, relief. Soma knew that what he did to you was wrong and not normal. He doesn't regret it at all. But now that you died when he himself did this to you... As he carries your baby in his arms, he somehow felt relief that you're gone from his clutches, and probably off to somewhere safer than by his side. He will take care of the baby, and he will slowly turn to normal.

YAN! GOD

Technically speaking, Liviticus can just spawn a kid. With the right genetic mix, etc. So it's up to you if you want to go with the nuances of pregnancy. He will be calm. Like, calm calm. It's almost unnerving how he smiles and leads you to an almost fantasy like ward (a forest) laid you down on the delivery bed (a comfortable circle mattress by the foot of a gigantic tree trunk) with helpers in tow (fantastical beasts), and guides you to a safe delivery. You weren't in pain, just a dull ache in your system as you push your child.

Post-delivery Liviticus will have him shower you with the most dazzling display of flowers and sprites dancing around you. The whole forest, and somehow the whole world feeling festive as they made this day a celebration, getting a divine message that the God's child is born. Everyone is ecstatic as they gave thanks to you, and worship you, and give blessings to you.

Again, unlikely to die. Considering your mortal body is dead, and now you're a goddess/god, you cannot die no matter what.

YAN! PROSECUTOR

Yuta was a nervous soon to be father, but he's more or less calm. He's following procedures to a tee, almost robot like. But in reality, he's on autopilot. He already panicked enough internally that he's robotic in your delivery day. You're already worried enough, why would he burden you with his whims and wiles too? He can't afford you getting your mind off of the baby at all. So, he's acting all calm and collected as he held your hand, wishing for everything to be over.

Post-birth Yuta will have him finally break down. At first, all of the personnel around him and you will be shocked as he slumps down to his knees. He doesn't even know why too. Until the tears fell, one by one and he's sobbing from relief. He'll thank you a thousand times, prostrate in front of you, and be spoiling you once you're good to eat. He's truly grateful.

If you die, Yuta will also fall to his knees and sob, but this time from grief as he lost his trusty partner, his true love. Why did he kill all of those people for? Just for you to die? He misses you a lot. He wants to hold you, kiss you again... But all for naught. Mysteriously, the people who helped you give birth died in random patterns. He'll also include others to put the suspicion off of him. But who cares right now? As he cradles your baby and watches the whole midwifery section burn and ensure that no mother dies from giving birth, he sighs, and wishes you were there with him.

[hatsunemitskislobotomy]

“𝘯𝘢𝘯𝘢𝘮𝘪—”

“𝘪 𝘩𝘢𝘷𝘦 𝘵𝘰 𝘭𝘦𝘢𝘷𝘦.”

“𝙠𝙚𝙣𝙩𝙤.”

“𝙡𝙤𝙤𝙠 𝙖𝙧𝙤𝙪𝙣𝙙, 𝙡𝙤𝙤𝙠 𝙖𝙧𝙤𝙪𝙣𝙙 𝙖𝙩 𝙝𝙤𝙬 𝙡𝙪𝙘𝙠𝙮 𝙬𝙚 𝙖𝙧𝙚 𝙩𝙤 𝙗𝙚 𝙖𝙡𝙞𝙫𝙚 𝙧𝙞𝙜𝙝𝙩 𝙣𝙤𝙬—”

❀° ┄───╮

in which your author (who has not written anything of substance in AGES) falls down the hamilton rabbit hole once again. is this an original thought? probably not. is it gonna hurt? y’all can be the judge of that 🫶���

╰───┄ °❀

her heart dropped as she sat on their shared couch. he just stepped out, a phone call— he promised that it would’ve been quick as he pressed a loving kiss to her cheek, it wouldn’t have been long before they would’ve been back to lounging around enjoying each other’s company. lord knows he needed it.

so why was he getting back into his work clothes?

“nanami…” she got up, he darted around their shared flat. seemingly unaware of her increasing alarm.

“they need me out there.”

“it’s halloween— you just got back!” a sense of dread crept up on her as she tried to reason with him but it fell on deaf ears.

he was always stern, stubborn. she cherished those parts of him but it seemed as if they were working against her tonight.

“they need me out there.” he repeated refusing to meet her pleading gaze and he buttoned up his blue dress shirt once more.

“i need you.” she argued

he finally met her gaze, his stoic one softening for a split second.

“i can’t be selfish, i have a job to do. people to protect— it’s what i swore to do being a sorcerer.” he swallowed taking her hands in his, rubbing his calloused thumb over her knuckles.

“those students i’ve told you about, they’re out there fighting, giving it their all. they’re just children.” he whispered.

“i have to help.” he pressed a chaste kiss on her forehead before pulling away.

and he had almost got her with his sweet words as he’d always do to coax her out of a bad mood when he’d take on overtime without warning.

but she wasn’t as forgiving this time. not when she felt as if she’d regret it letting him walk out that door.

“nanami— kento so help me god if you walk out that door, don’t bother coming back.”

his cool demeanor crumbled.

“darling…”

“no! you’re devoted to your job, you’re devoted to those kids! when will you be devoted to me? when will i be more than an afterthought?” her words cut through, bitter and raw.

“y/n you’re being selfish—” he countered, an attempt to bridge the growing gap between them

“because you won’t!” she snapped back, her tone thick with emotion as she pushed through.

“when will you stop acting like you don’t have a home to return to— that you don’t have someone waiting for you? do you even love me?” she shook her head at him, the bitterness of the words left their mark on her tongue as his eyes widened, the silence loud.

she knew her words were hurting him, but her anger was fueled by resentment. towards his job, towards his sense of duty leaving her neglected. it seemed like she didn’t even matter sometimes and it crushed her— so what if she was selfish? so what if she was unfair?

“of course i love you.” he murmured trying to step forward

“i don’t believe you.”

he swallowed before shaking his head. one, two steps and he was already invading her space again.

“darling…” he pulled her in, taking in her warmth as his lips found hers. she wanted to deny him the intimacy that made a mockery of what they once had but he held her firm. she wanted to deny it all but she couldn’t.

he had made up his mind, now he was just saying goodbye.

he pulled from her gently, his lips grazed her wet cheeks.

how dare he make her cry?

he whispered, "i'm sorry," his voice filled with regret. the weight of his duty and the anguish in her eyes collided. "i promise, once this is over, we'll have all the time we need."

she stared at him, torn between anger and love. "promises," she scoffed, a mocking bitter smile playing on her lips. "don’t make promises you can't keep."

he winced, the truth of her words cutting through him. "i'll make it up to you, i swear."

yet the unshakable dread clawed at her conscious. as he walked towards the door, he cast one last lingering glance at the woman he loved. the echo of her shaky breaths reverberated in the room, drowning in the silence of their shattered connection.

as the door closed behind him, she crumbled on the couch, her sobs the only thing now comforting in her time of need.

damn that nanami kento, the love of her life.

leaving her feeling utterly

𝙝𝙚𝙡𝙥𝙡𝙚𝙨𝙨.

❀° ┄───╮

y’all i haven’t written anything that wasn’t a bummy ass paper for school in ages pls be nice 😭😭😭

╰───┄ °❀

[edensrose]

˚◞❀˳ a proper farewell

god that title sounds dramatic as fuck so let me just clear things up immediately: no, I'm not leaving tumblr, I will still be very manageable to reach and interact. what I am drifting away from is the tolkien fandom — and since this place, despite my hardships, has meant so much to me - I decided to give it a proper little farewell, to the people who made everything count. along with a little explanation for my decision while shedding light on my experience. ( I'll try to be brief )

I joined the tolkien fandom while writing for thranduil, it's here I gained my following in the fanbase and things went quite smoothly. however, upon beginning to write for mairon, then melkor and then later the ainur — I saw an increase in hate anons. something I have experienced before, natural of a multi fandom blog, but never to this degree. initially I assumed it was because I was simply growing larger as a blog, and perhaps that is the reason — but from what I noticed, I was battling with a bunch of chronically online people who simply could not handle my love for. . . "problematic characters"

I never understood it, really. I never saw other ainur blogs getting the hate I did - I guess I'll truly never know. had I done something? was my writing just not good enough? were my vibes off? over the time I've been called things like two faced, fake, a romanticiser of abuse, lazy for not filing out requests, been told I shouldn't write reader inserts, told to kms and other graphic incidents ( such as people sending death threats and actual gore to my inbox ). this branched from burner accounts to anons, and I could just never understand why me. a quick gander at the #clownon tag and you'll find some of the instances in which I've been harassed.

I genuinely thought my writing was the issue.

which demotivated me from writing for quite some time. could I have turned anon off? sure, but that would have meant that the anons I'd frequently interact with would most likely not come around anymore. it meant a decline in requests, it meant just a crippling factor to my blog in general, so I chose to ignore. but it got hard to eventually. I was bullied for liking a god with big wings just because for crying out loud.

I've tried to fake being okay. fake being strong and unwavering about the hate, but I just couldn't anymore. and that's okay.

it wasn't all tears and hardships though. I have made very good friends through the tolkien fandom, many of which I consider close. from @bluezenzennie to @kiatheinsomniac — @a-contemplation-upon-flowers , @cilil , @someoneinthestars and so so many more. it'd take me forever to tag and honestly my heart is squeezing so much listing these few down already. they made fandom fun, whether it was our silly little play fights or collabs or you name it. those of you that have spent time to tell me about your day on anon or send in the nicest of things. I haven't forgotten them, and I cherish them, but it's time for me to go

am I sad? fucking of course. a part of me found so much comfort here and in these characters. I've spent hours on end developing lore for aus or designing aesthetics for writing — just writing and pumping out content or blogs, everything and anything I could do. and while I don't regret those times - the way I've been treated in response hurts. which is why I've made this decision.

I'm growing as a person too. I'm writing a book now, I've got an oc blog to promote that book that I'm working hard on ( @valentine-cafe ) , things are looking good. does this mean I'm just gonna disappear? of course not. I plan on staying around, getting back into request writing ( for other fandoms ) and still interacting and supporting my tolkien moots and friends. will I be writing or creating content for tolkien? probably not. at least not in the foreseeable future. the characters I once loved and cherished have now been ruined for me. I've been made to feel embarrassed for loving manwe and namo to the degree that I have, and I don't see myself being able to write for ainur without thinking of all the shit I've gotten for doing so.

regardless, I'll be here still. and while I might not be your local valarfucker anymore, I hope to be your rose still 🩷 thank you so much for two and a half years, I love you all dearly

[darkfictionjude]

I'm so sad for Percy. He really is the embodiment of the middle child syndrome, isn't he?

1). While Percy loves his mom a lot (and probably more than he loves his dad), it's obvious that she prefers Orla, even now (perhaps even more now she is dead, and can be idealized further than she already was in life). And Percy is in denial about this favoritism, as it became clear on the most recent update. Perhaps because he can't accept it, or it would break him.

2). Victor obviously prefers Sally. There is little to discuss further on this point. Percy is not welcome as Sally is on the financial situation of the family, and for good reason, since he doesn't seem to be responsible enough. Now, that may be our limited perspective on the issue and on Percy's behavior tampering with our judgment, but I think Victor must have a similar impression, to some extent, and leaves Percy out anyway.

3). While Sally is not a parent, he has been clearly parentified. And Sally has made his favoritism for MC so painfully clear, that Percy cannot do anything but denounce it. Even if Sally's perception of MC is problematic (as he infantalizes MC, and doesn't truly see them as an individual), MC is still more blatantly cherished.

4). MC doesn't have a favorite, but I think that's mostly out of not having opinions on most things rather than because they don't love some members more than others. That said, it would make sense for MC to trust on Sally more than on Percy. Although, it seems possible to build a closer relationship (very slowly) with Percy in game, yet I doubt it would ever be enough as to make MC one of the closest people to Percy. That boat has sailed long ago.

The other aspect is that Percy is also not actively hated by other family members. He is dismissed, or corrected in a condescending way by Sally (although I think Sally is somewhat condescending with all of his siblings, since he infantilizes them all, MC is just ten fold what Percy experiences). But he is not hated. And MC is actively despised by Prudence. And Victor I think does hold some affection for MC, but is not as much as he may have for the other children. Yet, in his case, he still paid a lot more of attention to MC given MC's issues, that he paid to Percy.

As for MC, I think Percy is conflicted. He is wary, he is jealous, he is intrigued but not invested. There is affection there, and maybe some unaware yearning for closeness (which he may very well deny to himself and to the world if ever made explicit by anyone, including himself). But he also has many reasons to keep distance and to distrust MC.

Percy, ultimately, fades to the background. And I think that's tragic. So far his existence seems lonely. But I think this comes from him not having any close relationship within the household, so I do think he may have them elsewhere in town. Yet, that's more of a hope than an actual theory.

You’re gonna to make me cry nonnie what the fuck it’s literally midnight here

This really does a good job of putting it all into a comprehensive list. It makes me feel bad every time I write scenes of sally showing so much affection for mc and not for Percy.

I did like the part where you said that Victor in some way cares for mc. It is interesting and complex how a parent can seemingly care for a their child but not exactly love them (or at least not love them in a healthy).

Percy is the jokester but his life is pretty tragic I think he would trade positions with mc if he could just to get that attention and care

[theteapotofdoom]

If you don't mind, can I ask, what are your top 10 (or top 7) favorite media (can be books/ manga/ anime/movies/tv series)? Why do you love them? Sorry if you've answered this question before......Thanks....

Oh, anon you have NO IDEA how happy this ask makes me, because there's probably nothing I love more on this earth than talking about the things I like!!! Nothing brings me more serotonin than sharing my favourite stories with other people!!! Let's go!!!

It's also a hard question because I just ... like things very easily. I have my favourites for sure, but there are A LOT of stories that I love and that made me who I am today. I also tend to hyper-fixate a lot so I will be completely obsessed with a piece of media for a few months and then it will go dormant for a year and then it comes back and so on ...

So with this list, I'm trying to narrow it down to the big ones, the stories that I return to the most and that had a real impact on me. It's also very hard for me to mix all the media together because I don't necessarily expect the same thing from an anime as from a movie so it's hard for me to compare them. But I'll do my best!

The list is under the cut because I'm gonna ramble a lot about all things and it's gonna be a really long post.

EDIT: Okay so I've been struggling with this list for weeks now because every few days I think of new things that I like and that I want to add to this list ... so to keep it as a top 10 and not a top 100, I've decided to not include any movie in this list, except for franchises (when the story is a continuation told through at least two or three movies). Basically, with this ranking, I focused on long-form stories.

My reasoning is that since I already have a really hard time ranking my favourite movies without including other types of media, it's easier to separate them and make another top ten of my favourite movies later down the line if anyone is interested. (Also not to sound like an insane person, but I feel like I have a completely different set of criteria for liking a stand-alone movie than for liking any other type of media so it's better this way)

1 - The Lord Of The Rings (movie trilogy) - Yes, I said no movies, but this trilogy is a mini-series to me. This one is just so deeply personal to me. I first watched the trilogy on DVD (extended edition) when I was 9 and it just blew my tiny mind and shaped my creativity for so many years. I read the books when I was a little older and I cherish them dearly, but the movies are so much more personal to me. I mean, what can I say that hasn't been said already? Everyone adores this trilogy. Just like many people all over the world, I consider these three movies comfort movies. I've watched them a thousand times and I will watch them I thousand more. No matter where I'm at in my life, I can just put on The Fellowship Of The Rings, The Two Towers or The Return Of The King and I will cry and laugh as if I'm watching them for the first time. Like ... my best friend and I were so obsessed with these movies as kids that we started calling each other Merry and Pippin and we still use the nicknames TO THIS DAY as adults. She is still saved on my phone as Merry and I'm still saved on her phone as Pippin. And it's not just the movies, it's the making of, the behind-the-scenes, the cast, just ... the pure love and optimism and dedication that went into this project ... the sheer honesty of the story ... no dark subversion, no sarcastic wink at the camera ... just love. If you haven't watched these movies yet, treat yourself! Get your hands on the extended edition, and watch it as mini mini-series rather than a proper trilogy of movies. You'll love it!

2 - Fullmetal Alchemist (manga)/Fullmetal Alchemist Brotherhood (anime) - I'm kind of cheating here by lumping the manga and the anime together but this is a short list so I'm doing the best I can! Again, what can I say that hasn't already been said about FMA? Everyone knows it's great, everyone knows it's the best anime of all time, everyone says it ... AND YET I still feel like it's super underrated. It's not, but I can't help but feel like it is. In my humble opinion, Fullmetal Alchemist is not just the best manga/anime of all time, it's simply the best story of all time. I'm still more emotionally attached to the LOTR trilogy, but FMA is just perfect in my eyes. The themes, the characters, the story ... I had never been so satisfied by a story before and I haven't been since. Every character arc is masterfully handled, and the story doesn't shy away from insanely dark and realistic topics while still maintaining a sense of hope and optimism. The magic system is one of the best I've ever seen. The story is so layered that every time I rewatch it (which is a lot) I notice new details. The world is incredibly rich but the plot always knows how to stay focused on the things that matter and we are never lost. Every single day I'm closer and closer to starting a YouTube channel just to talk about FMA nonstop. Long live Arakawa our queen!

3 - Les Misérables (book and musical) - Okay we're getting a little more specific here. I don't know if this one is surprising or not because if you've been following me for a really long time (like ... six or seven years) then you MUST remember when I was a Les Mis blog. I wasn't creating content or anything, but I was so deeply obsessed with Les Misérabled back then, it was the only thing blogged about for two or three years I'd say. Although I don't talk about it as much these days I still love this story so deeply. I will still cry if I think about Jean Valjean for a little too long, I will go feral if I see Enjoltaire art on my dash, and I will still re-read part of the book and listen to the songs. Basically what happened is: for my 18th birthday, my parents took me to London to see the show on West End, and much like the LOTR trilogy ten years before that, it ROCKED MY WORLD AND BLEW MY MIND! I bought the live recording of the show, did a deep dive into the fandom on Tumblr and I was hooked. I even watched the 2012 movie but we don't talk about it because it wasn't great (except for George Blagden doing THE MOST of all times with the little screen time he was given and carrying the Enjoltaire ship on his back like a king). After that, I read the book and it made me love the story even more. The novel is so rich and deep and such a delight at every turn, I adore it as much as the musical. It probably sounds obvious to a lot of people since Victor Hugo is literally one of the most famous writers in the whole world but like ... the character writing in Les Misérables is beyond anything I've ever seen. I can only ever dream of writing characters as good as these.

4 - My Hero Academia (manga) - Here were are ladies and gentlemen ... the one that everyone was waiting for! I think it's fair to say that MHA is the story that most people associate this blog with. I'm specifically talking about the manga here because although I still have a lot of fondness and affection for the anime (especially the early seasons) I can't help but feel like Studio Bones dropped the ball a few times these past few years (with the way they rearranged the MVA arc, the censorship of some of the most impactful scenes, and the whole Blue Sky debacle). Besides, I wholeheartedly believe that Horikoshi is currently the most talented manga artist in the industry and his illustrations always have ten times more impact than what we get in the anime. Once again, what can I say about MHA that I haven't said already? This blog is just one big essay about MHA and Shigaraki at this point. And yet, my relationship with MHA is a lot more complicated than with the other entries on this list. I don't think that MHA is a perfect story, FAR from it. I think that there are a lot of missed opportunities and wasted developments, and it also suffers from a lot of classic shonen tropes when it comes to some of its female characters. But when it hits? It really really REALLY fucking hits. When MHA is at its worst it's just kind of mid, but when it's at its best, it's just transcendant! The MVA arc, the AFO/All Might fight, the Deku retrieval arc ... it has so many iconic moments that I will think about for years. And of course, the man, the myth, the legend: Shigaraki Motherfucking Tomura. Best fucking character of all time, a success in every single way, a tragic figure, a threatening villain, a likeable antihero to root for, a chaotic gremlin and a sexy babygirl ... the man can do it all. No matter how MHA ends, I will always be grateful for Shigaraki (and for many other great characters like Deku, All Might, Iida, Toga, Ochako and so on). MHA was also the first fandom I ever created content for and it deadass changed the trajectory of my life. So yeah :)

5 - LOST (tv show) - I feel like almost everyone on Tumblr has a special attachment to an early 2000's live-action TV show with hundreds of episodes ... LOST is mine! As I'm writing this list, I'm realising that I have a similar relationship with LOST than with MHA: I don't think that LOST is a perfect show, it dropped the ball a few times and I understand a lot of the criticism against it ... but when LOST hits IT REALLY FUCKING HITS so I will always defend it. And just like MHA, LOST has a lot of detractors who never properly watched the show and throw a lot of bad-faith criticisms at it. Like I said, I fully admit that the show has problems, but some of the complaints I hear sometimes are just ... straight up not true and very easy to debunk. This show can be messy at times, but if you get into it, it will literally stay with you forever. The plot has issues but the character writing is pretty fucking stellar 99% of the time, I can definitely nitpick about some things, but it's honestly absurd how compelling everyone in the cast is. Pretty much everyone in the main cast (of like ... 15 people!) can be your favourite character and I wouldn't be surprised. At its core, LOST is just a very human show. The story of a group of strangers forced to live together on an island after a plane crash, forming relationships, overcoming their past traumas, and slowly being wrapped in a plot that's bigger than all of them. I go crazy if I think about it for too long. One day I will make a video essay about LOST and you will all see.

6 - Les Légendaires (comics) - Are you all ready for some niche content??? Honestly, I don't even know how to properly get into this one because I highly doubt that anyone reading this even knows what Les Légendaires is (except if you're French). Les Légendaires is kind of a funny story because pretty much unknown all around the world, but it is absolutely HUGE in France, probably one of the popular young adult comic series of all time. The series has been ongoing for 20 years and has sold millions of copies. Like, I cannot stress it enough, it's an absolute juggernaut with many spin-offs and sequels and a large fanbase. From age 11 to 16 I was OBSESSED with it. It's your classical fantasy story with a group of adventurers going on many different quests and forming bonds and relationships and fighting evil, but it's so perfectly executed, that it's kind of insane. The author is very open about taking inspiration from many stories (mostly mangas and animes) that he grew up with, so it's a wonderful mix of many different styles and genres of fantasy. The five main characters all start as classical fantasy tropes, but every single one of them is developed and challenged throughout the story. Everyone gets just enough focus and attention to be a main character in its own right. Just like with LOST, every single one could be your favourite character and I wouldn't be surprised! The series also did a wonderful job growing up with its audience, the first four volumes are more whimsical and child-friendly, but the series gets darker and more mature through the years (all the way up to the "Cycle d'Anathos" arc which is SO BRUTAL but also one of favourite story arc in a comics/manga ever, it's a masterclass). I kind of grew out of it now (mostly because the main story is over and we are now in spin-offs and sequels territory) but I still casually keep up with the evolution of the story from afar. Looking back on it, it definitely has a lot of flaws that I ignored when I was a teen, but I cannot understate the impact that it had on me growing up. I'm still very fond of it!

7 - Critical Role Campaign 2 (D&D podcast) - Honestly, I didn't think I would bring up CR in this list, but as kept thinking about the stories that had a real lasting impact on me ... The Mighty Nein saga just kept popping up in my head again and again. So here they are :) Critical Role was such a surprise for me, something that I never expected to impact me the way it did. I had heard of it, I knew what it was and that it was popular ... but when I watched the first episode of campaign 2 on a whim one afternoon (mistaking it for the first episode of campaign one, but the best mistake of my life honestly) I was just IMMEDIATELY sold and into it. I fell hard and fast for this group of chaotic friends. It's hard to compare CR2 to the other entries on this list because it's a story but also it's a D&D game with a lot of improv and impulsive player decisions, so it feels weird to compare it with like ... a fully produced anime or TV show. It's hours and hours of content, and I don't adore all of it, to be honest. But the characters? GOD the characters!!! The dynamics!!! The relationships! The developments!!! The appeal of this very very very long format is that you truly get to see the main characters evolving in a way that feels more organic than anything I've ever seen. I will think about the relationship between Caleb and Beau FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE and it's only one facet of everything that this campaign has in store. I've tried getting into Campaign 1 but it just doesn't hit the same for me (although I do love the animated series!!). Campaign 3 is also great, probably my second favourite so far, but the characters of campaign 2 all hit perfectly for me. CR2 had a HUGE impact on the way I think about characters whenever I'm writing these days and I will always be grateful for that.

8 - A Series Of Unfortunate Events (book series) - This book series will always have a special place in my heart, even if I don't talk about it as much these days. When I was a child, A Bad Begining was the first novel that I read on my own from beginning to end. No one else in my family was reading it, it was something that was my own special interest. To this day I still remember how engrossed I was in the mystery behind these books, with the secrets behind Lemony Snicket, Beatrice, VFD, The Great Unknown, and the Bombinating Beast ... it was just so thrilling to follow the Baudelaires in each new adventure while slowing realising that there was an even bigger mystery behind everything happening to them. I honestly believe that these books don't get enough credit as mystery novels for kids, each volume is its own stand-alone story with its own setting and colourful characters, while also giving the reader a new piece of the bigger puzzle. The tone was also so unique, it was funny and thrilling, but also creepy, unsettling and profoundly sad most of the time. Even beyond the terrible things that happened to the Baudelaires, there was also a deep feeling of nostalgia and melancholy in the narration and it made the reading experience unique. And of course, the playful writing style is so memorable! A full page with just the word "never", the deep black pages when it's dark all around, and sentences written twice when we're told that Klaus is so tired that he just read the same sentence twice. I loved these books as a kid and I still love them as an adult, their creativity of style and unique world-building inspire me to this day.

9 - Undertale (video game) - You know, even with all the crazy memes and fandom drama and AUs that came with it ... Undertale is such a wonderful, wonderful, wonderful story. I vividly remember every single thing I felt when I experienced it for the first time (I'm kind of cheating here because I didn't play the game first, I watched the Jacksepticeye let's play in almost one sitting, cried my eyes out, and went to buy the game and play it after that). It's such a unique yet universal story, so charming, so clever and so moving. The way it uses the most basic game mechanics as a narrative tool is honestly inspiring. It's the story that confirmed to me that, narratively, choosing kindness and compassion over violence will (almost) always be much more satisfying and compelling to me as a resolution. Like ... that scene at the end of the neutral ending when you defeat Flowey and you're given the choice to kill him or spare him? When Flowey practically begs you to kill him because he simply doesn't understand how you could possibly not do it? When you are given this choice at least five times in a row because Flowey DESPERATELY needs you to confirm his idea that in this world it's "kill or be killed"? When he just says "I don't understand" again and again when you keep sparing him? That shit is engraved in me forever. This is part of my identity. And I'm not even gonna get into the absolute masterclass that is the final fight of the Good Ending when you get to save Asriel and your friends because I will cry. Love that funky little game. Love my best boy Papyrus.

10 - Night In The Woods (video game) / Bojack Horseman (TV show) - YES I KNOW I'M CHEATING! But listen, I told myself that I would only do a top-ten and I deadass could not choose between the two, so here we are. I also figured that it would be a good duo to end on because NITW and BH actually have a lot of similarities. Depressed cartoon animals desperately trying to become better people while also hurting all their close friends ... yeah. Beyond that, NITW and BH are also very different stories with different tones, different mediums and different themes of course. NITW is a 9 hours indie game and BH is a six-season Netflix show (with therefore a lot more time to explore the issues it chooses to deal with). But both of these stories have had an incredible impact on me. And another thing that they have in common is that ... well, it's still hard for me to properly explain why they mean so much to me. I mean, it's kind of obvious in a way! These are stories about trauma, grief, depression, addiction, loneliness, growing up, moving on ... things everyone deals with at some point in their life. These two stories are acclaimed and beloved by a lot of people and I'm just one of them. As I said, I can't properly explain in what way I relate to these stories, but it's here and it's with me forever.

HERE WE ARE WE DID IT! God, there were so many other things I wanted to talk about ... Shinsekai Yori, Watchmen, Mystic River, Sherlock Holmes (the novels thank you very much), all of the Hercule Poirot stories ... and of course all the many movies that I wanted to talk about.

If you read this post all the way through, you are braver than the Marines, but also: what are your favorite stories? Feel free to share your preferences as well! :D

[mikavlcs]

If it really is the end of This I want you to know that you and your writings mean a lot to me.

You call yourself an 'amateur', yet you come here and write literal masterpieces.

You call yourself an 'amateur', yet you are something everyone cherishes, me included.

You call yourself an 'amateur', yet so many people were able to find an escape from their shit-hole of experiences and torments through you and your creativity/creations.

You have no idea how much I'm going to miss you if this is really good bye.

You have no idea how much you affected my life with your writings and posts in general.

You have no idea how much I'm going to miss our threatening sessions every now and then (I say this with love<3)

You have no idea how much I appreciate you taking the time to write something so-so... beautiful and then share it with us.

If this really is good bye know that I'll miss you and that you helped me through a period of a lot of anxiety and depression and I couldn't be anymore grateful to have stumbled on your account.

Since writing is something you genuinely enjoy, I hope you continue to do it for as long as you feel like it and that you don't let anyone get in the way of what you do<3

I love you and respectfully tell your father to visit a rage room, heard it does wonders. (I don't mean to disrespect you in any way with this comment btw)

(if this is it)BYE MIKS IM GONNA MISS YOU <3

THIS IS SOOO. crying in class rn.

why is this one of the sweetest messages i’ve ever gotten…thank you sm and i’m really glad that my dumb stories were able to help you through times. your rbs have brightened my days (yes, even the ones with the threats).

(and no the comment about my dad isn’t disrespectful. that probably would help lol)

i’m try my best to not let this be goodbye because if it is, then who’s gonna threaten my life whenever i say sorry??? exactly. so i’m gonna try being positive and say that this isn’t goodbye but either way, thank you alex. i love you too<333

[eyesupchilsy]

Orchid, camellia!

orchid ⇢ what’s a song you consider to be perfect? I'm gonna give you my holy trifecta here but just know I have more songs that are "perfect" but these three are the songs I'd throw in the playlist first

Say Yes To Life is just THE feelgood song for me. Whenever I fall in a slump or like I'm having a trip up this is the song I put on. It's a very good "it's gonna be fine just take the leap" reminder and I think that's why I find it so perfect. I also use it as a turn up for the party song cause the 2nd half of it makes me cry happy tears and cry and just everything. I don't think there is a song I've heard that makes me feel SO MUCH as this one does. Overall it's just perfect in all those aspects and I cherish it dearly.

If you know me you know I'm a huge believer in love and romance and soulmates and that's exactly what this one is to me. It keeps me hopeful and waiting. To me the song also is very much the feeling of being in love and falling in love and just that whole excitement. And the lead up and then part where he goes "I wanna be loved, I wanna be whole again so tuck my hair behind my ears and touch my soul again" KILLS ME every time cause it hits so freaking right. Overall it's a beautiful song like the lyrics and beat and just everything just screams perfect. I could cry.

This song is one of the probably most near and dear songs to me, like this whole album to me has always been the only no skips album in my life. I think rarely anyone in my life knows how important each one of these songs is to me. Gold Steps will always be my safe haven whenever life seems like I'm in over my head. The lyrics in my mind are some of the most relatable ones I've had to myself and the music too. This is a song that 19 year old me needed and now 26 year old me couldn't live without. It was the first song I was ready to ink onto my skin and to this day I'm still waiting for the perfect way of doing that to pop up.

Also idk if yall wanted to read all that but enjoy I just really like talking about music and stuff and rarely get to do it.

camellia ⇢ what were you like when you were younger? do you think you’ve changed a lot? When I was a kid i used to be a little ball of sunshine bouncing off walls like a permanent sugar rush situation. But life happens and people happen and so shit dims your light. I like to think I'm finding my way back to that person now however cause I know old me is somewhere in there still. Being assigned Daniel Ricciardo in any quizz or "who do i remind you of" game helps a lot too ngl.

[snapbackslide]

i wasn't gonna do a commentary on this one bc 1. it's spittin chiclets & 2. i forgot i even used to do these 😭 but i'm creating a new layout and i put the interview on while i worked, then interesting things started being said... so... commentary szn is back baby

(warning: it is very long, because.. well. it's matt.)

1h 30 into the video......... for reference................

first of all i didn't even know this interview was being made at all, i literally just stumbled on it tonight. AND i was not prepared to open old wounds. that day, that lunch hour, my break was almost over but i extended it by 30 minutes so i could cry in my car. i couldn't believe it. now i laugh about it.

man, i was going to be so dedicated to nashville. i knew he wanted to stay there for life and i was gonna make my peace with never seeing him in a habs jersey, if it meant he got to win a cup in a city he loves, that loves him back.

"i got paid to go away", "it killed me", "i called them and begged them not to do it, literally in tears", "i read it on twitter before i got the call" ah, man. how wonderful. how. wonderful.

and that's two teams he was in love with that treated his exit like crap! and this time he really didn't want to leave. to think at the time i believed that old ass gm was the worst thing about the management.

but if there's any silver lining to all this is that he doesn't seem too bothered about the colorado situation, and he's still friends with landy. that's... that's something that little old me, at like 18 years old wasn't doing too well with :') my my how times have changed.

"i'm an absolute mess, i've cried more than i have in my whole life, i'm not a crier", "the owner called me and i just started crying on the phone with him", "my son heard me say out loud i'm not a predator anymore, and he started crying, so then i started crying"...

can we. can i. can i not have to hear this from another fave again. like. seriously, is it possible for my faves to just. be happy. be cherished where they are. not have to cry over their careers and circumstances. is that possible? wtf.

that hurts me deeply. and i can't believe it's happened to both my top two.

side note: i wish he'd say what the other teams were but i know he wouldn't 😭😭 i just wanna know if the habs called... i don't think they did... i know berg wanted him, but hugo... if they got rid of toffoli cause of age and speed or whatever 🙄 yea they probs didn't even try. and if it wasn't the habs then i don't wanna know who called at all actually 😂 it would probably feel awful tbh. imagining him elsewhere, again. i'm so glad he picked dallas. and i hope i never have to see him in another jersey again, UNLESS IT'S MONTREAL. okay. side note over.

1h 40 .. ha ha .... "no it was not them" about minnesota 😂 and for that, we STAN. thank you. bc if it was.............. 😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂

so this was mostly about nashville and the buyout, seemingly. and again, as a 17 year old getting into this sport, it's crazy to me to witness all this. i'm very sentimental and nostalgic. i struggle with letting go and the passage of time. to think back to my old self, at school, in my old bed at my old place, listening to songs i don't listen to anymore, the night he got traded from colorado, to imagine all this happening now...

the reason i latched onto him so hard at 18 (after going through a period of not being able to stand him... lol talk about enemies to lovers) is both the fact that i see myself in him so much, AND that he reminds me that men like him exist. he's also sentimental, he's also christian, the way he feels about music, it's so similar to me. it's so comforting.

he said he still isn't over it and i get that. and i also get people thinking it's weird that he compared it to grief, but if that's the way he sees it then i don't think we should judge. especially since he consulted with a therapist, and defining it that way is what helped him understand it and navigate it. and i love him for being so vulnerable. i love him so so much.

i'm always gonna be on his side. and there's a part of me now at 26 years old that is so sad and worried because i don't know how much longer i'm going to be able to watch him play hockey. and i don't know if my dream of seeing him as a hab will ever happen. we got so damn close. and i can't believe soon enough i'm going to watch all of my faves retire.

and that's why i'm latching onto the younger guys on our team, i guess. looking towards the future helps. it's a lesson i'm taking with me in my life as well. i felt so old at 25. then i turned 26 and realized just how young i still am.

and i'm kinda getting off track now but with the new year starting, and with matt talking about how he's really cherishing every single day now, that's how i wanna live my next year. every day is a blessing from God. i'm genuinely so happy. i'm so excited.

every new interview of him is legit like candy for me. and i can't wait to watch him win a stanley cup.

[sapphicsunfox]

Its so painful to just accept that she hates me. I think I coped deluding myself into thinking that haha she couldnt truly hate me. There was love there. It cant just die. And even if she didnt love me, there has to be at least something other than hate?

But she despises me. She says i made her miserable. And i know its valid and of course that might be true. Maybe i did make her miserable. I was a lot to handle, i was shaken, i was hurt, i didnt have any tools, i was suicidal. And I regret the colateral damage i caused to those who cared about me. And im sorry i didnt give you enough time, and im sorry i dumped my sadness into you. Im sorry i didnt tell you enough times how much I loved you. Im sorry i took you for granted cause breaking up with my soulmate was unfathomable. Im sorry i didnt try harder, that i didnt ask harder. I wanted to love you right. All i wanted was to love you right cause what was the point of loving if you dont feel loved back? Im sorry i didnt know how to handle it ans caused you pain. Im sorry i didnt communicate better. Im sorry for the times i was scared and it hurt you. Im sorry i didnt express better. Im sorry i made fun of a show you liked. Im sorry i didnt take you on more dates. Im sorry i didnt ask for more clarification when you said you wanted a break. I got scared. I thought i lost you (i did). I never wanted to lose you.

I know now it doesnt matter. I can be sorry all i want, i can better myself and learn and improve and become a bettee person, but to you ill always be The Toxic Ex. And im sorry about that, too. You also were that for me, for a while. It took me a long time to accept youre the person ive loved the most and i couldnt hate you. Not when i was so happy you loved me I cried when you said for the first time. Not when i couldnt hold my smile when i looked at you. Not when i wanted you to come live with me so your mother wouldnt hurt you anymore. Not when i wanted to travel the world with you and have a dog and a rat. I wanted to be your family. I wanted to cherish you. I loved you.

I love you, still.

So it hurts that you genuinely hate me and i made you miserable. But youre allowed to. Its not my place to change your mind, to make you talk to me. To message you. You have your life, you have a boyfriend. Youre probably not even living in this city anymore. I dont wanna let you go, i dont want it to end like this. I want us to talk and make amends. Hell, even as friends. I dont care. I just want to make sure you know i loved you with all i had in me. It was very broken, but it was all yours.

But you despise me. You think my art is shitty. You think im shitty. I think you were the love of my life. I cant hold on to this tiny hope that maybe, maybe if we talked- its gonna destroy me. Its destroying me already. I wanna throw up, im anxious. Im hurt. I wanna make things right.

You blocked me the second you came across my shitty art, and i respect that. I have to, for you and for me. Im sorry I even thought about messaging you. Im sorry for the messages i drafted. Im sorry for the messages i sent. I was desperate, to be honest. I never wanted to lose you. You were my everything, but all I did was made you sad, right?

I hope your boyfriend treats you right. I hope you find happiness and joy. Selfishly, I want you to think of me and wonder what if. I want you to wonder if you should send a message. I want you to stalk my socials just to know how I'm doing. But I can't keep being selfish. We deserve better than this one sided thing I have going on. And im sorry I didnt get to make amends. I wish you had apologized, too. I'd hold you. I'd cry, probably. Always been a bit of a crybaby. I'm so vulnerable when it comes to you.

If you see me on the streets, I hope you say hi.

I love you. Im sorry.

Maybe in another life.

[afterth0ughts]

dear maine,

it's late at night or early in the morning. i should be asleep, but i was planning on watching some lecture videos. i can see the lights on in your room, but you're probably asleep.

i think about the times you told me you want me in your life forever. we could get married or not, whatever i wanted, but you just wanted to be in my life. i think about you saying that and then i inevitably start to tear up. i inevitably think about us at night.

and i want to hit myself because this is what i wanted. i agreed we needed to break up and i took the coward's way out and had you break up with me because i didn't want to be the one to break up. but i digress. i am just as responsible for this.

but i guess it hurts and it's all me. forever felt like the walls closing in when we were together. i miss you now that we're apart. i miss you so much. and i just think about how you said forever and i cry and want to scream.

you deserve someone better than me, someone who will love you and cherish you, who will share your interests and you won't have to pull teeth to find something on netflix you both can watch. they'll be as neat as you are and your house or apartment or whatever will be tidy. you won't have to nag them.

sometimes i unfairly think that if you really loved me, you would be willing to fight harder. i don't even know what precipitated this last end - i was trying so hard. and now that i think about it, i just need to know. i need to ask. maybe i will in the true morning.

if i were a better and selfless person, i would leave it alone. but i'm not. i wish i were. i wish i was good enough. i'm going to look back on this in 10 years and be angry, probably. he couldn't love me enough because i couldn't clean. he couldn't love me because i don't like kissing. he couldn't love me - and this one is entirely valid - because i get frustrated easily. i snap too much. laid out like this, it seems so stupid, but the weight of it broke after 1.5 years.

he couldn't live with me.

right now i miss him and i want to retreat and i want to curl up under a large tree and fall asleep and sleep forever, i want to disappear. i want him to miss me.

i see now we were doomed and are still doomed. and this is no longer a letter to ben that would never be sent, but a truth. that happened somewhere between the tears.

i don't think i can watch lecture videos now, but i don't want to close my laptop and be alone in the dark and cry. i love you, ben. as soon as i think about getting back together, my head says no we can't do this again because we are doomed. and i know you wouldn't take me back. you shouldn't.

i need you here to give me a hug and tell me it will be okay but that's not fair to you and i'm not gonna ask that of you. and you just came out so i guess you're not asleep.

when the rationality doesn't win, there's a small girl within me that asks why didn't you love me enough.

none of this is fair to you and i just wish i were a fox napping underneath a tree.

why am i such an easy person to leave. i must be easy to leave. if i weren't, maybe someone would have stayed.

[darkempress86]

I had to give up Coco today. I'm heartbroken. She didn't want to go. I miss her so much. I've been crying off and on all day. Chad called during one of my crying sessions. He knew I was crying immediately. He said, "I know what today is, and I'm so sorry. You've got this baby girl. I know you're hurting right now, and it's probably gonna keep hurting for a while. But I'm here for you, and God has you. He's holding you in his hands, and I'm holding you in my heart. I love you so much. You're so strong, and I know you're going to be OK."

What did I do to deserve this man? He's incredible, and I love him so much 💗

This was the last picture I took of Coco, with her head over my heart. I'll cherish it forever 💔

[ihuglenael]

Happy birthday, little star!

Halo bubub! 🤍

Hari ini berat ya? But you made it through to this second. Aku minta maaf karena lagi-lagi dunia jahat sama kakak. Aku minta maaf karena dunia udah ambil senyumnya kakak di hari dimana harusnya kakak senyum tanpa beban. Aku minta maaf karena dunia gak kasih kakak kesempatan buat nikmatin hari ini dengan sepenuh hati.

Tapi makasih banyak karena udah lewatin hari ini meskipun mungkin air mata kakak yang mendominasi. Aku izin peluk kakak ya? You did well, you did very very very well.

Bubub, 7.305 days has passed. Congratulations on entering a new age. I know there's going to be a lot of worries coming as we age, and 'fear' is probably the word that describes your feeling the most. Well, I'm not gonna lie, leaving our teen phase and entering our 20s is a scary thing, indeed. But I'm sure, this is one form of getting out of the comfort zone and you know, we'll soon find a new comfort zone as we get out of the previous one. So, I want you to trust yourself more.

Hidup ternyata bukan hal yang mudah dijalani, ya? Pasti gak sekali dua kali kakak nangis, kecewa, marah, kesel, sedih. Apalagi kakak udah hidup selama tujuh ribu hari. Udah berapa banyak emosi yang kakak rasakan selama itu? Pasti banyak banget ya? Then, that means you're alive. Your heart lives, and you live a good life.

'Good life' disini berarti kakak sadar betul bahwa kakak adalah manusia, manusia yang memang ditakdirkan untuk menjadi perasa. Mungkin juga ada beberapa kesempatan dimana kakak menahan semuanya dan berpura-pura baik-baik aja, dan tentu aku gak akan bilang kalau itu salah. Your feelings are valid, apapun perasaan yang kakak rasakan dan bagaimana kakak menyikapinya. Maka dari itu, terima kasih sudah memanusiakan diri kakak sendiri.

7.305 hari, udah lama banget ya? Coba kakak tengok sedikit ke belakang, tapi aku mau kakak skip hal hal jelek yang udah kakak lewatin dan fokus sama hal-hal bahagianya aja walaupun hal kecil dan sederhana, okay! . . . . . . ⏳ . . . . . . udaah? Gimanaa? Seneng gak liatnya? Semoga kakak seenggaknya senyum sedikit inget masa masa itu, tapi aku harap kakak enggak ada niatan buat kembali ke sana karena hal yang udah lewat pastinya gak bisa diulang. But don't worry, sekarang kakak liat ke depan lagi, ada banyak lemabaran kosong yang belum kakak isi. Mulai hari ini, kakak bisa isi lembaran-lembaran itu dengan banyak hal menyenangkan. Aku gak bisa kasih garansi kalau isinya bakalan bahagia terus tapi aku harap hal sedih dan jeleknya cuma jadi hiasan yang mengingatkan kakak bahwa kakak memang manusia, si makhluk perasa.

Hari ini udah mau berakhir, tapi sinar kakak gak akan pernah berakhir. Hari ini hari spesial kakak, tapi aku yakin, in any day you will remain stand out and you will shine brighter.

Kakak, makasih ya udah lahir ke dunia dan ketemu sama aku. It's a pleasure for me to meet kindness, warmth, love, and happiness in the form of you. You wouldn't understand how grateful and proud I am to be your cherished one, and if I had to go back in time, I'd still choose this path. The path that led me to meet you. Even in the next life, I won't hesitate to choose the life that has you in it.

I'm sorry if the world is too evil and it drains too much of your tears. But I hope you'll continue to move forward and live your life with all your heart. Now hold my hand, we'll get through everything together. I will always take care of you and keep you company as long as I am given the opportunity by the universe and as long as you allow me to.

Please always remember that you're allowed to cry, laugh, sad, happy, doing nothing, and being passionate. You're loved by many arounds you, especially me. Thank you for being you, thank you for being alive.

Once again,

Happy birthday, little star. May you keep shining bright wherever you are.

Written with love, yours.

[brummiereader]

@justrainandcoffee what a beautiful love story, Flor 😭❤️!

I can't believe I'm at the end of their story already 😭. This chapter was filled with so much hope and everlasting love ❤️.

I gotta admit, I was a little worried what Collins was gonna say to Maggie 😬. I get why he said what he said to the children, but I was nervous he was gonna do the same to his wife, and I don't think that would have been the best idea.

Maggie, he's not dead." Collins said, looking at the ginger woman who was crying silently in front of him. But apparently, his last words took her by surprise. Yeah, probably not the best way to say it Collins 🤦🏼‍♀️. You can't just say "he's not dead" 😂. I reckon I'd have the same reaction as Maggie 😳.

And if he had to shit on the Geneva convention, then Collins was sure that he will. Eeeh 😬, this little internal thought from Collins got me a little nervous!

You wouldn't have happened to have a certain Scottish actor in mind when you was writing Charles 👇😍???

Either way, i loved this part! And you did an absolute fantastic job with his dialogue. Had me giggling at his casual description of Will taking down the German plane 👌.

"Come home, Will." 😭 a tiny little line, but it broke my heart. The most tragic part about this is, there's only a small amount of sea separating them. So close but so far. I still find it beautiful how she goes to sea, and thinks of him. I'm a huge fan of mutual pining in stories, so add that with the separation war created...*😘.

I'm relieved he managed to get his beautiful poem to her. It doesn't surprise me that he'd give up his cherished watch to make sure she knows he's safe ❤️.

He got his soldiers welcome home! Arghh my heart could burst 🥰! And now we know how PI came into their lives ❤️. I absolutely adore the fact you had him keep his return a secret and surprised Maggie and the kids with his arrival. It just adds to the romance this whole series oozes! It's like a movie. One I'd definitely pay to go watch 😍.

"Just in time for the lunch," Maggie joked, but still crying. "I'd never miss it, my love." I love that these were their first words to eachother, such a husband/wife thing to say 🥰!

The kind of silence that screamed "I love you." What beautiful words to end this series with, Flor. And not only that, but you had them enjoying the sea view that was separating them, finally together in each others arms .

Absolutely loved this little mini series. One I know I won't forget ❤️.

The sun always rises again (Farrier x fem!oc) Part III - FINAL.

Masterlist || Part I - Part II

Summary: Maggie hears the news from Collins || Farrier is now a prisoner of war but he's not ready to give up yet. He promised to return home and that's what he is determined to do no matter what it costs. || Farrier meets a new friend.

Warnings: Hurt/Comfort. Happy ending. I did research on the second world war, but probably some events written here are inaccurate. I invented Farrier's fate (the real "Farrier" was never captured, so...)

Words: 2.5k.

Thanks to those who reblogged and commented this story. Love you, girls. I enjoyed this new journey.

1940

Collins felt the chill wind in his face when he was arriving at the Farrier's house. In his mind he had the right words to tell her, but not to the kids.

How do you tell them that his father wasn't coming? They were really young and like Daisy, that pretty girl said, they needed to have hope, too. Even him.

It wasn't sure that William was indeed dead, but Collins calculated the distance and assumed that he landed in enemy territory. So almost probably he was captured. He needed to speak to his superiors but the Farriers were priority to him in that moment.

The Geneva convention offered his friend protection, in theory. That, if the Germans respected what they signed, which Collins wasn't sure but it was best that to think the worst. If so, they could set free with the condition that he wasn't going to attack them again. Or probably Farrier, if he survived, was going to wait till the end of the war. Farrier had a combative spirit but also he wasn't so reckless like he was years ago before meeting Maggie. He loved his profession, but the love he had for his wife and kids couldn't be compared to anything.

Collins was a strong man, but the idea of being in a concentration camp was so awful that he didn't want to think about it.

And he didn't know that the war was barely beginning.

Both kids, but especially Edward, were happy to see his father's best friend there. The boy loved his godfather and for him it was always nice to see him there.

Collins lied to them, he had to.

"Your dad is coming in few days," Jack said while he was ruffling the boy's hair and had Clara in his arms. "I'm here just to say hello and to see how big you two are. He speaks about you the whole time!"

"How the battle went?" Edward asked.

"Everything ended well," he responded smiling to them. "Where's your mom?"

"In the kitchen! She's baking us a pie!" exclaimed the girl.

"She's the best, isn't she?" Edward looked at his godfather and Collins could see his friend's eyes in that boy. He nodded.

"She is, Ed."

.

Maggie has seen him already and she knew that all her anguish inside her the last few days had an explanation now. Collins entered the kitchen with his hat in his hands and avoiding her gaze. He asked the kids to wait outside so inside that warm place were just the two of them.

"Maggie, hi."

"Jack, it's good to see you. After all these years… I-" her voice was trembling but she managed to talk "I'm really happy to know that you're fine. I prayed for you, too."

"You're very kind, Maggie. I.. he asked me," Collins wasn't going to pretend that his friend didn't know why he was there and not her husband, so playing dumb wasn't in his plans. "William told me to come here and take care of you and the kids. To help you. Temporary. Maggie, he's not dead." Collins said, looking at the ginger woman who was crying silently in front of him. But apparently, his last words took her by surprise.

"What?"

"He's not dead."

Jack explained to her what happened after he was forced to water landing and was rescued. Her brown eyes looked at him like asking Jack the real events. But Collins wasn't lying.

"The convention protects Will. Him and thousands of soldiers and other prisoners of war. Because the Germans and Italians, want the same as us. The other side of the coin, of course, but they don't want their men being harmed because they need them. And we need ours."

"Will is alive then? Is it not a joke?"

"Of course it's not, Maggie."

The woman hugged him and sobbed against his shoulder. Being a prisoner of war was an awful destiny for everyone, but it was better than being dead in a distant land with no one near you to left you a flower. Or being under the sea, being one with the ocean for the eternity.

Collins didn't tell her about his own fears. Hitler was doing everything in his power to conquer the world and apparently he was succeeding. And if he had to shit on the Geneva convention, then Collins was sure that he will.

Hope.

.

William Farrier was cold despite the season of the year. He was afraid that his feet were already frostbitten, but it didn't seem the case, maybe just the sensation. He massaged them to activate the blood circulation again.

That was the second week there. With France invaded by the Nazis and already surrendered to Hitler, Great Britain was the only country that was facing Germany. For now, at least.

He was still in the France that weeks ago wasn't enemy territory but now it was. Around him, Farrier saw other soldiers all of them sharing a small space, sleeping in the ground or not sleeping at all.

Farrier never talked a lot and it wasn't the exception now. The conditions were they where were bad, but it could be worse. The news arriving from Germany were disgusting and incredibly cruel.

If something good the leaders of different countries did, was to sign that convention. Without that one, he could be dead by now. Especially considering the damage that Farrier alone caused to the enemy.

Yet, despite the cold and hunger he kept in mind that it wasn't bad. Although it was.

The convention stipulated that officers of his ranks weren't obligated to work for the Germans, but he was. And hundred of other men, too.

William still had Maggie's picture in his pocket and was probably he most valuable treasure along with the watch she gifted him. If anything, Farrier trusted Collins with his whole soul and knew he was helping his family but he missed them a lot.

"Who's she?"

A bearded man with a thick Scottish accent approached Farrier and asked when he saw him with Maggie's photo in his hands. William noticed a scar on his nose that reached almost his left ear.

"My wife."

"Very pretty."

"Yes, she is. And a good woman as well."

"Any little beans?"

"Two. Ed and Clara."

"Family can cause problems sometimes but is in this days that we miss 'em, innit? I'm Charles."

"William."

"I know," Charles said. "The pilot. Yer a fuckin' hero, mate. We saw ya, phew phew. And them fuckin' boom! Ya sent 'em to hell in thousand pieces."

Farrier smiled "I guess, yes."

"Ya don't deserve this shit."

"You either, Charles. No one deserves this."

.

The beach was a good place to be. Two weeks passed since Collins returned and even when he was in his house now, after Maggie promised him that they were going to be okay, the pilot called them almost every day to see if they needed something.

"They're negotiating," Collins said to her once. "They went to make an arrangement with the Nazis to free the prisoners of war."

And apparently it was true. But until now they had no news.

Her kids were playing at the seashore while she was sitting in the sand watching the waves. She could see herself in Edward and Clara. The innocence of believing Collins words. There was a time when she believed her mother's words and the promise of being a family again. It didn't last long, but while it last her words sounded well for her.

She remembered the first time in that pub when she saw him. Just eight years ago, and yet it seemed to be an eternity. If someone promised her that they have the power to change the past and never meeting him and in consequence, avoid this sadness in her heart now, she'd rejected the offer. Not even in those dark days she could accept that kind of thing. She loved William. He was the best thing she had and together they built a nice family. Those kids existed because they were together and loved each other and that was invaluable.

"Come home, Will."

She didn't realise she was crying again until she felt two pairs of arms hugging her. She hugged both children and the three of them remained in silence until the sun started to hide.

.

Those days, Farrier hurt himself and sent him to the temporary hospital that was built there. A nurse was bandaging his arm when he looked at her.

"May I ask you something, miss?"

"Mrs," she corrected him "Mrs. Thompson."

"Mrs. Thompson, I need to know what are the chances to send a letter to England now."

Mrs. Thompson saw him like he was asking her to kill Hitler herself. "Very low, Mr. Farrier."

"But not impossible."

The woman looked at him for a moment before closing the curtain around his stretcher giving them some privacy.

"What do you want?"

"Just send a letter to my wife. My kids."

"London?"

"Sussex."

The nurse low her voice and whispered to him "You're asking something almost impossible. They confiscated a lot of letters. This an occupied zone now. But it can be done anyway, illegally."

"How much?"

"You have nothing, soldier."

"I have this watch. It has to have some value. You can sell it, I need to communicate with them."

Farrier took off Maggie's gift the one he had with him from the beginning of the war and gave it to her and the nurse examined it. She nodded. "I will bring you a pen and paper. But be brief, the thinner the envelope is, the better."

Two days later the letter was going to England inside the box of medicine that a fisherman had. They allowed the old Frenchman go after checking he wasn't a menace.

Maggie received it five days later. It was the first sign that she had in a lot of time that he was still alive and she couldn't help but cry. It was brief as a poem, but clear. According to his words, it was true that he was hold as prisoner but was fine. Maggie asked herself if he was lying to make her feel better, but just the news were enough for her.

"I'm waiting for the moment to be with you again. I love you, my beautiful wife. Forever. Remember my promise, I'm coming home even if it takes me a bit while to do it. I love you, W.F."

Collins heard about the letter as well because Maggie called him almost immediately. The next weeks to add hopes to that letter, he knew that finally the negotiations were having some good effect.

July was almost beginning when finally Collins received the call he was waiting for, he almost jumped from his bed. And the news reached the media as well. Radio and newspapers were announcing it:

"… The immediate liberation of French and British men held as prisoners in France."

Paris was the price that France paid for it.

_

Epilogue

A dog with only three legs started to follow him as soon as he arrived there. Farrier looked around to see if that maybe his owner was near but it didn't seem to be the case.

He stopped for a moment to pet his head and the dog started to jump around him. Too precious to be a street dog, but Farrier was convinced he was.

An old woman approached him.

"Welcome back, sir. You're one of those soldiers that Churchill brought back, aren't you?"

"Yes, ma'am."

"God bless, Winston. You're lucky, sir. Very lucky," then she looked at the animal who was now sat down next to his leg. "The dog likes you, it has no home. Just a fleabag. He's lways eating what he finds."

"I'm taking him with me, then."

"Good decision, sir. And thanks for your services."

Both Farrier and now his dog, walked the familiar streets. It seemed to be a lifetime since he was there. Some people stepped outside just to see him go. Some clapped, others cheered him. Kids asked him questions that he didn't want or know how to answer.

He asked himself if in every city and town it was the same towards the men returning home.

Home. Four letters that have a meaning that he could explain.

He didn't call his family, he wanted to surprise them.

He finally could see the white walls, the green grass, and his kids' toys outside the house. Ed's bike was next to the tree and the door was open. Farrier looked at his dog and nodded. The animal was the first one to approach the house.

"Mommy! Mommy! A dog!"

Clara saw him and petted him but it was Edward's voice who alterted the girl that someone else was just in the door.

"Dad! Dad!"

Edward ran towards the man and hugged him. Clara, took some seconds to recognise him, but when she did, she did the same as her older brother.

Maggie standing under the door frame with a plate in her hands, was crying not believing her eyes. There je was again, as he promised.

"The dog needs a name," he said to his kids once they let him go. "He's yours now."

"Really?!"

"Of course. He needs a bath and food, I'm sure you can do that."

"We can, dad!" Edward took his sister's hand and both of them ran outside followed by the happy dog that soon was going to be named Pi.

Finally the matrimony was alone.

"Just in time for the lunch," Maggie joked, but still crying.

"I'd never miss it, my love."

"Oh, Will…"

Maggie put the plate she had in her hands aside and touched his face. He had beard now and his hair was longer. But that was his caring husband, it was him.

William and Marguerite finally kissed eachother. His hands found her waist and he brought him closer to him. How much he missed her.

"I love you," he said touching his forehead with his.

"I love you, too, Will. You fulfilled your promise."

"I did it. And I'm not going anywhere now."

He kissed her again. And Maggie lost herself in his touch. Later that day, they were going to rejoin in ways that now in the kitchen and with their kids around they couldn't do.

Or with Collins watching.

His friend knew he was going home because his superiors alerted him, even if Farrier didn't say anything to his family, all the rest obviously knew he was back in England. So Jack drove there to finally see his friend again.

Men shouldn't show affection those days and yet, the moment he stepped in and both men saw each other again, they hugged for a long time.

"Thanks, Collins," William said.

"No need, Farrier." Then, Jack saw at Maggie was again hugging her husband and smiled.

Sometimes family is a matrimony, their two kids, the husband's best friend and a three legged dog.

The lunch there was shared with all of them together. Even Pi.

The afternoon, Collins stayed in the house with the kids giving the couple the opportunity to be alone in the beach.

Maggie spent almost a year and a half alone sitting on the sand contemplating the sea and now was doing the same only that this time, William was again with her.

He was kissing her neck. Their fingers interwined, resting on her stomach, while she was sat between his legs.

No one said anything. The sound of the waves accompanied their reunion. Silent as Farrier was, but was that kind of silence that if you listened carefully you could hear a lot.

The kind of silence that screamed "I love you."

[mads-istired]

the fact that people on this website know my name, REMEMBER my name, and use my name when talking about me, aND ADRESS ME WITH MY NAME literally fucking warms my heart so much like I beam so hard that I’ve had people ask me why I’m smiling so much, and I’m already a smiley person... and its literally just my name. wow, i love you all so much