#i love weaponized forgiveness that's just such [chefs kiss] good writing

[holydivers]

theo is such a funny character he went completely batshit and then he got better and was like “wow that was fucked up i deserve to die for that someone kill me” and elsa was like nope you can’t get out of it that easily you have to stay alive and deal with the burden of knowing what irredeemable shit you’ve done you don’t get a redemption arc OR closure. so now he’s just fuckin chilling in a castle basement hoping someone kills him while also trying to find a way to become completely invulnerable bc the mercy of death is too good for him and all his friends are like dude what the fuck

[unhealthyfanobsession]

nesta rhys bonding over being the eldest sibling and the pressure that comes w it? this one might not be to everyone’s taste but they’re my favs (forgive me) and i like them getting along. also your rhys is SO GOOD ugh chef’s kiss. you make me love him again queen. YOUR POWER.

I’ll let you in on a secret … writing my version of Rhys is my guilty pleasure so here you go:

Nesta loved to read, which meant that every description started to feel stale at some point and there were certain phrases that peaked her annoyance by even entering her own brain. One of those overused phrases, for Nesta, was when an author described a tense moment by saying that the air grew thick.

Nesta hated that phrase.

So right now, as Rhysand of all people stared down at her with gaping lips that for once did not know how to formulate words, Nesta refused to acknowledge that the air had, in fact, grown thick.

Really, she knew, it was her throat constricting in shock.

When Rhysand offered to teach her to use the Illyrian bow, Nesta was convinced it was some scheme Feyre cooked up to try and make them “bond.”

But Rhysand had been determined from the start. Careful and steady and respectful. He never mocked. Didn’t even tease. He just gave precise correction as he drove her to pick the massive weapon up again and again and moved the target back farther and farther.

After weeks of slow progress, when Nesta drew her elbow back and released the massive arrow as an extension of her body until it slammed directly into the Center of the target at the very farthest corner of the training ring … it left them both slightly in a state of shock.

Bodies tense.

Jaws dropped.

Air thick.

“It wasn’t because of Feyre,” Rhysand blurted. Nesta rose her brow, gaze still fixed on the target. “Why I wanted to teach you myself. It wasn’t because of Feyre.”

“You said it was because you were better at the bow than Cassian and Azriel.”

“And I am,” Rhys preened, “but only because I practiced the most. They preferred other weapons.”

“Why did you prefer the bow?” It seemed impractical, for a High Lord who possessed magic that moved faster, farther, and with more power than a bow. Close up sword and combat training always made sense, but why would he need distance?

“I promised my sister I would teach her when she was older.”

Nesta swallowed, once again refusing to think of the air as thick. Rhysand barely ever spoke of his sister. Nesta didn’t even know the female’s name, she realized.

“I am a very poor replacement for that promise, I imagine.”

“She would have liked you, actually, I think.”

Nesta gaped. “That may be the nicest thing you’ve ever said to me.”

He smirked, “Astrea was … strong willed,” he smiled. “Opinionated. She hated Illyrian society but craved the opportunity to prove them all wrong. What you did in the blood rite … she would have killed to do that.”

“I’m sure she would have if…”

“If I hadn’t signed her death warrant.”

“That is not what I was going to say.” It was strange, this pensive, maybe even self-deprecating side of Rhysand. Nesta squared her shoulders, “No mistake should carry the consequences that ours did.” She swallowed, “And no child should have to be responsible for their family.”

Rhys’ eyes went dark. “Our mistakes were very different, Nesta Archeron.”

“Were they?” Nesta set the bow down, pulling at the straps on her wrist guard. “Because it sounds to me like we both failed at a job that should have never been ours - protecting our younger siblings.”

“It’s different,” Rhys’s voice was still quiet, eyes turned down, “because I had the power to stop it.”

Nesta whirled around, eyes narrowed in confusion. She never imagined he’d meant …

“I hate that you let Feyre go into those woods, Nesta. I hate what she had to do. I hate it with everything inside of me, but you were just a spoiled girl who didn’t know any better. I was a Carynthian warrior with the power of a future High Lord. It is not the same.”

“I was just a spoiled girl who didn’t know any better,” Nesta agreed. Long last defending herself or her actions to anyone. “But you didn’t know any better either. No matter how important you may think you are in your own mind, Rhysand, you can’t stop death.”

The High Lord let out a low chuckle. “And you can. Ironic, how these things work out.”

“I can’t stop death either,” Nesta shook her head. “I can just … delay it.”

“Long enough,” Rhys looked up to the blazing sun shining over the training ring. “Long enough to save the sister you couldn’t save before. I will never get that chance.”

“You saved your brothers.” Nesta wasn’t sure why she was comforting Rhys, or why he was being so … decent to her, but she knew from too many nights with her head laid on Cassian’s bare chest as he told quiet stories from his childhood, that she spoke the truth.

“It’s hard,” she said when he only shrugged. “Being the oldest. It feels like you are responsible for everyone else, and even if it doesn’t feel that way everyone acts as though it should. As though you are another parent. The expectations … everyone forgets that the same steel is welded to our siblings’ spines and they can take care of themselves. Or maybe sometimes they can’t, but there was never anything that either of us could have done that would have changed any of this.”

“She definitely would have liked you.” Rhys smiled, and for a second Nesta understood what everyone went so stupid eyed for. “You and her and Amren together would have been the end of me.”

“Don’t worry,” Nesta clapped him on the shoulder, “Amren and I are still working on our many plans to be the end of you.”

[alextriestowritestuff]

Elite S3 reactions (Episode by episode/overall thoughts +SPOILERSSSS)

So I know I post writing stuff but I have *EMOTIONS* about this show and no one to share them with so please ignore this post, if you don’t watch the show/don’t care. Includes spoilers so you’ve been warned.

Ok, I’m going to go episode by episode then do my overall feelings. I’d love to know anyone’s thoughts about the show so feel free to reblog! I just watched the show in 10 hours straight but alot goes on so I might not be able to remember every single conversation in a episode. Multiple characters have a lot going on at once. For reference, I don’t speak Spanish-I watch the show with English subtitles. 

-3x1: Carla

-Pretty solid start, we pick up a couple weeks after we left off. I felt so DUCKING bad for Carla the entire season and I understood why she lied in court about accusing Polo. Malick is introduced-am I the only who doesn’t like people who are persistent in asking other people out? Like my no is a no. Don’t annoy me, this is the kind shit people pull and pressure others into a relationship. It’s not endearing to me. So I automatically didn’t like him. 

-Lu gets kicked out but can someone tell me where she lives throughout the season? I figured she lived with her mom after her dad kicked her out but at the last episode, in the airport, she says both her parents have disowned her? Where has been living? Maybe she saved up money unlike Valerio idk. 

-3x2: Samuel and Guzman

-Samu is trying to get Carla back. I didn’t dislike them as a couple last season but I knew they were using each other, so I didn’t allow myself to get too close to them. But now I ship them. I wanted them together this season. Yeray is introduced-um, I still think he’s irrelevant. I did think for a moment that he was going to hold his money over Carla’s head so she’d stay with him but he didn’t even think for one second that was why Carla was trying to get with him (because her asshole dad pimped her out ugh) . He was only helpful when it came to the contract at the end.

-Deadass, I was going to exit out if Valerio had slept with Rebe’s mom. I thought that entire scene was pretty much sexual assault and it was creepy. He needs to go to rehab lmao.

-Polo trusting Guzman again was a dumb bitch move. So here’s how I feel about Polo. V unfortunately, I love him. He’s one of my fav characters. I know he’s a killer but Idk I think it’s the actor or something because he’s so pretty (the entire cast is beautiful) that I forgive everything he does?? Also I hated Marina by the end of S1 so he did me a favor. What I wanted from Polo was to embrace the fact that he was the villain. Like the times he threatened Lu by taking away the scholarship or (tried) to threaten Samu. Those scenes I was like hell fucking yes, no more wallowing. But noo this boy wanted forgiveness. Dude. You’re cute but you still killed someone, jesus. I would be so ashamed/guilty to be hanging out with the brother of the person I killed. He played himself there big time. The tweets were interesting way of revenge and ofc Caye used that to her advantage. She’s a leech but I thought she used the fact that she had the murder weapon (as leverage for Polo to stay with her) waaay more. 

3x3: Cayetana and Valerio

-Strange couple but eh, better than incest. So in this episode, Samu makes a deal with the worst detective ever (every season, she fails to solve a case lmao) and I don’t blame him. He’d do anything to get Nano back, it’s why he tried to get Polo arrested for an entire season. It’s shitty that he did that to Rebe but I understand why. Before this season, I thought Rebe was irrelevant because she wasn’t really fleshed out but after this season, I grew to like her a lot. It hurt watching her and Samu get close because everytime she said something like ‘you’re the only good thing in my life’ I was like girl, he’s the reason why you’ve lost everything ugh. It was uncomfy and sad to watch. 

-Ander and Omar. I liked them-didn’t like what Ander did last season but he did confess and was forgiven. So Omar’s whole cheating thing came out of left field and it wasn’t! Even! Properly! Confessed! to! Ander!!!! Oof. Ander SUFFERED this season. But I’m glad the writers chose cancer over HIV because there’s so much stigma attached to that disease and the LGBT community and I’m tired of that narrative. 

3x4: Lu

-I’ve always respected the hell out of Lu. Yes, she’s been a bitch for the past 2 seasons but she was always upfront about her actions. She didn’t like you, she let you know. This was her shining season and I loved her Valentine reversal. She looked hot, she really looked out for Nadia/Ander this episode (and the entire season). She could’ve revealed the cheating but she didn’t. I feel like S1 Lu would’ve so she’s come full circle. She said NO to Guzman which was everything. Oh speaking of which, I actually like Guzman. He’s really developed as a character in terms of temper. I like that he wanted to move on from hating Polo. But when he’s with Nadia, he irritates me. 

-I don’t have Muslim parents but I have Muslim cousins. My parents are immigrants. They’re not extreme like Nadia’s but like I feel Guzman goes out of his way to make Nadia’s home life worse. He’s knows her parents are conservative but he’s strides in the store and tells them about how their daughter can’t study. Should Nadia had said something? Yes but how could she? She has responsibilities to her parents. Her 2 other siblings have been kicked out. Nadia claims that her religion is important to her but Guzman repeatedly disrespects it. I couldn’t be with someone like that. It wasn’t cute that he offered to work so Nadia could study-which we saw him do ONCE. It’s overbearing. Also Nadia just forgives him so easily, it’s like dude, do you not care? So I like Guzman-he’s actually a good friend to Ander and formerly, Polo but my god, he’s so disrespectful when it comes to Nadia.

-Also I liked the threesome, not as good as Christian/Polo/Carla but not bad.

3x5: Ander

-Best episode this season, hands down. I loved the opening song and sequence. The scene where Polo’s parents catch him with Valerio and Caye really got my gears thinking-I was like if I were a parent (don’t want kids but ya know, if I did), how would I react to that? I’d like to think that I’d be very accepting of my kid (given they’re not hurting themselves or others) in terms of sexuality, religion, etc. But I was like hmmm, being polyamorous?? Not one I would be prepared for. But if the kid is happy, I guess. That was random but those were my thoughts. 

-Rebe finding out it was Samu who sold them out hurt like a bitch. BUT MY GOD THE BLACKLIGHT REVEAL!! Ugh the best. I had to pause, I was so shook. And Malick and Omar reveal to Nadia. Jesus. I loved her reaction but it was immediately undermined by the next episode when she forgives her brother. Like I get it, they’re siblings. But she should’ve held it against him longer. Omar got 0 consequences for cheating this season-not from Ander or Nadia. Tf.

3x6: Rebeca

-Carla is on drugs. Yikes. Again, her dad was pimping her all season so I get it girl. Also anyone else think the adults are stupid in the show?? All of their parents are business people but one bad financial move, they’re on their asses and almost bankrupt? Happened with Guzman’s dad and now Carla’s. Do they not invest in other things? Idk have a savings account?

-Also Samu and Guzman being friends. Top tier content. Chef’s kiss. Full circle and character development to the max. Ngl I felt a little bit of homoerotic tones there?? Just me?? I would ship them over any other couple if they got to together for just one night. 

-Nadia sharing the scholarship with Lu. Ugh. Everything. Loved that.

-Ander lying to Omar about having an affair. Ew. I know he was trying to push Omar away but like he was the one cheating? So either call him out on that or just break up with no reason. Don’t make yourself look bad dude. Ugh but the both of them sobbing at the end of their breakup...my heart shattered. That was GREAT acting. 

-Polo saving Carla. We all liked that. 

3x7: Nadia and Omar

-FUCK Ander’s mom for expelling them. I went to private school-there’s rules in place for parents who have money so they don’t manipulate the administration. Polo’s moms needed to let their son fight his own battles. Also Ander’s mom calling Guzman to come over to talk to Ander was really strange. She just expelled him. I know he’s Ander’s best friend but idk, she just expelled him. And they don’t even talk about it at Ander’s house. Again, this is the Guzman I like-the loyal/good friend. Loved the convo between him and Ander. 

-I liked Carla’s honesty to Yeryay and that they could possibly be friends. I always knew he idealized her for standing up for him on social media so I’m glad they acknowledged that. 

-Also Lu’s comment to Nadia that she looks like a pistachio was everything. And her ‘People are watching’ line in the previous episode is great too. 

-KEVIN FUCKING MCHALE made a cameo. Hell yes. And ofc, great speech by Nadia and Lu. Polito’s last conversations really did a lot for me to symphatize with his character (He didn’t have to do much because I still liked him despite his murdering). He got his moms to face the fact that they can’t throw money at every problem and that he is a killer. This scene and the beginning scenes of the next episode is what made me at peace with his character. I knew he was going to die but like this is what he needed for some sort of redemption. 

3x8: Polo

-Not the best ending for such a good season. But the first 15 minutes which are the convos and events that led up to Polo’s death was good. I never suspected Lu for a second, I really thought Valerio (Had some decent motive-more than Nadia, less obvious people like Samu and Guzman) had done it. But when I rewatched the trailer, you see that the writers told us it was her all along. Her line about the ELITE gang being family and that she’d protect them was a clue. She had the least interaction with Polo himself throughout the season so I never had time to even suspect her. Really brilliant. 

-Them touching the murder weapon is powerful. This was the only way to end things. I figured by episode 6ish that everyone was working together based on their answers in the flashforwards. And I half laughed because no sane police force would allow the witness/potential suspects to hang out together before interrogation. At least not without police watching them. 

-I do think it’s odd that Samu asked Rebe to ask her mom to get rid of Polo because he literally betrayed her and she talks to him (although mad) despite that. OKayyy. I really thought we were going to get the Samu and Carla get-together but guess not. I feel cheated by that because they clearly wanted each other all along. 

-The endings weren’t the best. I do appreciate that Omar made the right call in the end and I’m glad Ander is in remission. Oof my gripe though was with Nadia and Omar’s parents. So Lu goes to the airport and admits hey my parents disowned me and they’re like of course, we’ll be your family. AND I WAS LIKE ‘WHAT ABOUT OMAR??’ Y’all were so willing to kick him out and they never really made amends. So like I get that Omar’s dad is trying by acknowledge that Ander is Omar’s boyfriend but I mean during Omar’s mom’s dinner, he had no right asking him about his studies. He didn’t move out. Y’all kicked him out. How do you think he’s doing, trying to find a place to sleep? Jesus. Also the mom isn’t all good. Again, if I were a mom, I don’t understand how I could live without knowing if my kid is okay since they’re not living with me. My mom is a single mom-I know there’s no man in the world, not my dad, no one that she would chose me over. If my husband kicked my kids out, no questions, the husband is going to the curb or I’m going with my kids. Idgaf. The mom should’ve stood up. It just made me so angry that they were like poor Lu, no family but they mistreated their own child. 

OKAY so overall thoughts...I thought this was a really good season. I’d say 1st was the best, then this one, and then second (Ngl I don’t remember the 2nd one too much okay). I liked that it was more angsty and more character focused then the whodunnit? part that we’re used to. The entire cast has such strong acting and I’m going to miss whoever isn’t returning for S4. I’m going to miss Polo as well goddamn. 

Best moments of the season: Lu saying/doing ANYTHING-I have feelings, bitch. Her friendship with Nadia and other characters. Carla standing up to her pimp dad. Ander being in remission (his acting was great too). All of episode 5. Kevin McHale cameo. 

Worst moments: Polo asking Guzman if he would ever be forgiven?? And I know he did end up forgiving him but like bro, just because I don’t want to harbor hate for the rest of my life, doesn’t mean I forgive you for killing my sister whatttt. Omar never confessing to Ander about the cheating. Like no consequences and his character was just demolished this season. Still don’t know where Lu lived this entire season lmao. Anything Ander’s mom did to the students ugh.

Overall, I liked this season. It felt more mature for a high school TV show. I’m not super invested into any particular ship so I don’t feel cheated like most people. It takes me a while to get into ships but once I do, I get really invested. The only ship I was really disappointed in not seeing was Carmuel because Carla went through alot this season and Samu clearly wanted to be with her. And that’s all I had to say lmao.

[yfere]

Shipping Calculus! Live updates from C2E64

They say that fire exposes a person’s priorities, but we here at the lab believe that a gaggle of overly friendly moaning demons can also do the trick. Thank you to @softazelma, @fyeahthominho, and @alarnia for helping with data entry! Masterpost here.

+500 to The Mighty Nein/Totally Not Anachronisms. Beau invented the phrase “Don’t shoot the messenger,” and also ravioli, with her hidden chef talent. Caleb, having wheeled and dealed with the rich assholes of the Empire, naturally invented the game of golf during his year at the Academy. And Moro watched only half of the first season of Stranger Things. Don’t spoil her, okay?

+150 to Caleb/Astrid/Eodwulf “FOR FUTURE REFERENCE, JESTER, I’ll have you know that Eodwulf who I have never mentioned to you and who was not mentioned in the letter was buff and muscular and strong and so talented whoops that’s not even a physical description anymore but did I mention he was impressive? So if Marion Lavorre meets a black haired blue eyed incredibly eligible and attractive and gifted heartthrob of a man that’s the one you’re looking for BEWARE.” Okay, Caleb. Gone are the days of being content with all the love being directed at Astrid, I see. All right.

+0 to Jester/Beau Well, if an indirect kiss involves drinking from the same water glass, is it an indirect flirt if you both flirt with the same person? Moro became the unlikely receptacle of both these gal’s affections this episode, between Beau’s loud and enthusiastic appreciation of Moro’s criminal hustle, and Jester making sure Moro knows that Jester thinks she’s cute (and that she’ll kill her for lying to them). Beau as usual hyping up Jester’s awesomeness to everyone (in this case Caduceus) who will listen. Shockingly, this episode Beau seems to have acquired the ability to actually fool Jester into thinking she’s fine, which resulted in point loss and meant Caleb instead had to pick up the slack to gracefully get some help for the poor beat up monk. (For him, that’s +6 to Caleb/Faking Injury for Friendship)

-30 to Fjord/Shortcuts Just as when Captain of the Ball-Eater, Fjord is ALL ABOUT running into clear danger if it means shaving one or two days off of a trip. Into the eye of the storm! Into Ground Zero of the Calamity! We care for speed here, not safety!

+18 to Caleb/Jester and speaking of Caleb having a Thing for strong people, how he continues to single out Jester as the Strongest Woman, who even is Yasha, which creates a perfect combination of #ItPaysToBeADamselInDistress and #LovesToBeAKnightInShiningArmor between the two of them, as Caleb begs for assistance getting a horse on his moorbounder of COURSE Jester can do this alone, Jester squashing Caleb adorably and staying there for….a length of time while at Moro’s (I guess Caleb is the type to have people sit on his face huh), and Caleb very effectively pulling his “Oh no, I am so weak and delicate I must have a fainting couch to rest upon for a spell” to Jester’s delighted crowing over how weak he is. Caleb as usual thinking Jester’s out-of-the-box thinking with an aerial view is The Best Thing Ever. Jester wanting to get in on the Healing Caleb Action Caduceus has been hogging with a Cure Wounds, what do you mean Fjord is injured too? (#ItReallyDoesPayToBeADamselInDistress). Caleb’s Worrywarting directed at full strength at Marion Lavorre. +4 to Yasha/Cockblocking for Jester bringing Yasha in on the horse moving action. Point loss for Caleb’s Worrywarting creating Jester Worrying and making her lose sleep. Nein! Not okay!

+17 to Beau/Yasha because as we all know mutilating corpses with Beau is a sure way to her big gooey heart. Also, Beau adopting a Striking Pose after striking the enemy dead, and the Gay Power of that alone probably making Yasha’s rage drop, as she struggles to pick her jaw up off the floor and reorient towards combat.

-10 to The Mighty Nein/The Neighbors as they apparently carry a couplea severed heads in plain view all across town on their way to the Xhorhaus before storing them. According to the local Mighty Nein Neighborhood Watch, this is only the third or fourth weirdest thing they’ve done.

+24 to Caleb/Caduceus as Caduceus continues as always to think Caleb is the solution to all problems always with his cool magic and his alarms, though +5 to Cockblocking for both Jester and Beau who tragically remind him that there are other people out there who can also do things. The slip into nearly calling Caleb “Mr. Clay” instead of “Mr. Caleb” is of note, and someone needs to investigate what he’s been writing in those hearts in his journal pronto. Caduceus making Caleb his #1 priority in battle, #ItPaysToBeADamselInDistress, with his ray of enfeeblement, healing, attacks, and physically standing over the wizard in a defensive stance to protect him! Batting away attacking bats (while Caleb crawls around collecting guano!). Points taken away because poor Caduceus forgets for a moment that the next brightest thing after his own pink hair is Caleb’s. It’s still romantic if you’re saving people from trouble you sent their way, right? Right? Points gained for asking if Caleb is okay after the fight, and for them both being very dark, between advocating for decapitation and threatening Moro and her employee with decapitation, simmer down a second Caleb.

+10 to Caleb/Vulture Culture. Between Frumpkin’s new shape and getting Those Good Spell Components, our dear Caleb, covered once more in gore and shit and Death, is his happiest self. Hopefully he didn’t ruin his new fancy threads.

+2 to Beau/Hosting as Beau practices Manners and Decorum with a “no, sir” to the attacking demons (#CustomerService). Some mixed messages by following this up with pummeling them to death, but An Effort Was Made.

+4 to Caduceus/Nature as he found a new mushroom! Which will definitely not be a bad mushroom in any way.

+90 to Caleb/Cat-Shaped Creatures. There’s the usual spying Frumpkin rigmarole, but it says something about your love for cats when you’re willing to forgive, nay, even love, suspiciously dog-like behavior of gross licking for affection—so long as it’s coming from a cat. Caleb cleverly disposing of troublesome corpses and feeding his favorite members of the M9 at the same time. Caleb also adorably taking Jannick out for a little run on the Fields of Death, and all the Moorbounders coming in clutch as fighting machines (with some wonderful light-based assistance from Caleb, Support Catster Extraordinare), and somehow remaining unscathed during battle.

+45 to Fjord/Jester. Lips. Made. Contact. With. A. Cheek. That is very cheeky of you Fjord, if I do say so myself. Jessie is said, not once but twice, and Jester gets to be her true #LovesToBeAKnightInShiningArmor self as she saves Fjord repeatedly by murdering the demons attacking him, only getting slightly annoyed that he gets in trouble immediately after she saves him the first time. Seriously though, the amount of Goopy Feelings Jester has for saving this poor man….well, #ItPaysToBeADamselInDistress. Point loss for poor Jester failing to look as cool as the knights in the novels as she falls flat on her face with the handaxe strike, but she makes up for it by pounding the creature to death with her spiritual weapon instead, that was totally intentional. Point gains for Fjord being very Pleased with anything and everything Jester got up to, Jester pumping up Fjord’s accent and impersonation skills, contributing to Corpse Interrogation with her own Disguise Self, and the Excellence that was the fake Insta-Death spell the two of them threatened Moro with.

-8 to Nott/Yeza “Tell Veth I love her” does not make up for fucking ditching your husband without a word, Nott, you absolute asshole. Please talk to your spouse.

+13 to Caleb/Fjord/Jester In another great week for this triad, they all prove to be Excellent at Delivering Deceptive Threats, though Caleb is as per usual a little too serious about his contributions (though the other two are uh a bit more on the serious side as well this is a Bloodthirsty Throuple) The Epic Triangle Of Saving Each Other, as Jester rescues Fjord and Fjord hustles to rescue Caleb, followed by Jester’s healing action. Fjord taking joy in Jester falling on top of Caleb, and the both of them being very good about letting the Totally Actually Injured And Not At All Faking dramatic wizard take a short rest for Beau.

+1 to Fjord/Caleb. Most of their points this week were more applicable to Caleb/Fjord./Jester, but the instant “Moro, you got to die” when Caleb Can’t-Switch-Tasks Assassin Wizard suggests it is still very fun. Fjord sort of leaps to Caleb’s suggestions this episode, the ultimate yes-and-man.

+6 to Fjord/Detective Work as he steers the party clear of the Bad Tar Pits, they might have landed in quite a sticky situation otherwise

+20 to Critters/Detective Work, as the cast very loudly run through the Totally Natural Conclusion to the clues provided in the last ep, they Definitely Solved This Themselves, they had No Help From The Internet.

+14 to Fjord/Caduceus. Fjord offers to “loom” over Caduceus’ shoulder and points out that he looks “fleek” like damn, Caduceus, the boy is making an effort for you! As usual they are On The Same Wavelength and good cop/bad cop Moro and co. like pros, no discussion or even a conspiratorial glance required, they know what the jig is before anyone else. Fjord advocating for sending Moro money because that was Caduceus’ plan, no one is allowed to argue. Also being excellent interrogators of corpses together. Fjord is a huge fan of Caduceus’ magical food powers, #MagicalCrush, would “not turn down” Caduceus’ healing, and he kills some bats Cads was slapping around. Unfortunately without the bats Caduceus proceeds to slap a bunch of points out of the ship by saying he “doesn’t care.” That is cold.

+7 to Jester/Caduceus as they do a little awkward dance on the steps to make it around each other, and spending hours annoying everyone else in the party by talking about Cleric Things. Caduceus being impressed over Jester totally lying about being able to talk to dead horses, and Jester going wild over HOW COOL the Corpse Interrogation was. The Clerics Cuddling for comfort when the enemies first attack, since that was definitely what Jester and Caduceus were doing no questions here. Points taken away because Jester’s enthusiasm for Corpse Interrogation sort of glosses over how Caduceus “feels dirty” over the whole affair, they are apparently not too compatible in this area.

-5 to Nott/Yasha as Nott makes a sincere and successful effort to apologize to Yasha for sticking her like a pincushion and trying to be Nice and Supportive with memory games to help Yasha remember the “drow.” But points are drained away into the negatives as Nott goes a little too hard with the interrogation over Yasha having potentially killed people to make orphans (“that’s a cool name” and “Orphie” is terrible and does not make up for this nonsense), and Yasha’s well-received but still terrible allowance of Nott’s alcoholic predilections. They are a wonderful trainwreck to watch.

-20 to The Mighty Nein/Names. As of right now, there appears to be one (1) member of the Mighty Nein in Caduceus Clay who did not at some point either change their name or have some type of Name Angst over what someone else has named them. Though making faces at ‘Ducey might come to count for something, in time.

+11 to Nott/Jester Speaking of Disguise Self Shenanigans, how Nott is the Moro to Jester’s invisible bugbear, making them the logical pairing of the Corpse Interrogation Caper. Jester’s adorable confusion over her nickname being “Little Sapphire” which leads to Nott instantly screeching about how beautiful and perfect Jester is, that lovable dumbass. Nott using the word “shiny” to describe Jester, which seems technically a little odd but says loads about Nott’s affection for the gal, as this is the #1 lover of Shiny Valuable Things in the party speaking.

+8 to Jester/Yasha as Yasha in her sweet soft way also points out how Jester is very pretty and brings up Fluffernutter as a potential badass name that some of the people in her tribe might have been named for. Jester, for her part, directing Worrywarting in Yasha’s direction over how she was recognized and trying to give Yasha control over what they do next and what Yasha wants, though dear Yasha who cannot assert herself to save her life only manages to tentatively say she wants to know what’s going on before saying she’ll do whatever the group wants. (They! Want! What! You! Want! Yasha!)

-6 to Jester/Curtains, which surprisingly don’t taste as good to tieflings as they do to moths. Further experimentation required to determine how delicious they are to goblins, firbolgs, half orcs, aasimar and humans.

-101,019.01 to Critters/Child Poverty. TAKE THAT, CHILD POVERTY! This is how much was raised at the end of the stream, and a deserved kick in the face to all Child Poverty ships everywhere #AntiChildPoverty

[seenashwrite]

Notes From Nash: Season 15 Episode 2

We're back! And by that, I don't mean back for episode #2, I mean we're back in the little town, same little town we were in for the majority of episode #1. And as far as how ep #2 compares with ep #1.... um.....  

The writers ain't in no damn rush to advance the plot or further character development, are they? So this is basically ep #1 all over again with some guest star overload as a substitute for those two very important aspects of storytelling I just mentioned.

[stares at date]

They've got *how* many eps to wrap up the show? 

Hoo-boy.

Spoilers below the cut.

Changing it up from last time (see link at bottom), I thought I'd go in order of the ep this post. All right. Let's roll.

From the mom who gets 86'd in the opening------

And, PS: That's not disemboweled. Don't use the word if you (a) don't know what it means and/or (b) won't let make-up/effects do their job.

-----to the rest of the people, I care nothing. There was no point giving all these extras lines and whatever little backstories, I give no fucks. Mainly because, gee, I don't know, I signed up for a show about two brothers goin' out there and gettin' after it, and thus far we've gone about two inches and gotten nothing.

Are we still in this little town?

More questions, borrowing from the dialogue some here:

"Remember when we did the thing with Amara?"

"God's sister?"

"And the soul bomb? And here's how it worked? Remember? Because you participated? REMEMBER?! I'm not just saying this for the benefit of, oh wait, no one, because the chances of brand new viewers coming into the game this late is virtually nil, so everyone - including us, here, in this scene, our characters - already know this backstory, ergo the only reason for exposition anvils is to benefit those viewers, who - as we've already established - likely don't exist. So let's run through this for the benefit of, I have to assume, the writers who don’t actually, you know, watch the show as evidenced by--- well, we’d be here all day."

Nope. No, no. Those aren't questions I had. Because I've been watching the show for a good while now. This exchange should’ve been something to the effect of - “I was thinking - remember how we did the soul bomb, with Amara? Do you think you could pull off something like that? To trap them?” and then Rowena responds with uncertainty but will give it a try, etc. I mean, the writing in this ep is thus far pedestrian.

There's still no explanation for why these ghosts - especially these super notorious ghosts like Ripper and Lizzie and who-fuck-ever - were lingering so close together that they were able to be trapped by the stupidest ex machina spell in the writing world. And what of the others? The entirety of hell escaped. We've seen, what, maybe 20? Could there maybe have been a throw-a-way line to Belphagor something like “Did you corral the worst douchebags together”, or “Is there a bar in hell where the worst douchebags hang out or something”, or “this is just our luck that the worst douchebags landed here” or WHATEVER, just SOMETHING to acknowledge they (the writers) recognize that Convenient Super Bad Ghosts Are Convenient.

IT'S KETCH, BITCHES!

I love this character. What a breath of fresh air that snarky piece of ass has been. I hope he doesn't get killed. He will. Because we can't have anything good. But there is some good, which is the Ketch-Rowena flirting. Honestly, I'm fine with Rowena getting action from anyone. She's awesome and she's earned it. Ketch is primo catch, though. (I'm not sorry for that sentence. I am, but I'm not.)

The repeated use of Belphagor's name pleases myself and my podcast co-host. Should you wish to know more about that demon, please do check out our podcast. Don't look him up first, trust us. That they have chosen this particular demon's name is just *chef's kiss*, though I do hope it's not a foreshadowing for how the rest of the season is going to go. Okay fine, I'll spoil it: he's a shit demon. He deals in poo. Literally. I'm not lying. Go forth to the podcast @youtotallymadethatup​ - just about every post links you to where you can listen. /shameless self-promo

IT'S AMARA, BITCHES!

Let's hope that wardrobe does her better than that ill-fitting black dress this go 'round, she deserves better.

"You're the darkness, I'm the light."

STOP IT. STOP. FUCK. STOP.

Are we still in this little town?

Blah blah blah Castiel Dean angst repeating essentially what's already been said at the end of 14 and last week blah. "You know what's real? We are." Not if it's an alternate timeline, my love. 

I keep forgetting just how many spaced-out chains you need to have strewn about your standard meat packing plant and/or factory, well played, set dec and props. That.... that was sarcasm.. (Look, I got no beef with the crew, they're just playing the cards they've been dealt, and their hands are garbage, just a pile of same ol' same ol' stereotypical, unimaginative stuff, so bless them. I hope every single one of them has a job lined up next year, truly. They have more than paid their dues and earned it. Lord knows especially since certain parties took the reins, good night nurse. I've digressed. )

IT’S KEVIN BI----

This is dumb. This is actually dumb. In case you didn't see my half-time post, and I quote:

That is *three* in under twenty minutes. Like, it’s episode 2. You’re blowing your wad. Pace yourselves. AND MAYBE SOME STORY ADVANCING, THAT WOULD BE AWESOME

This bullet thing could be hella interesting. It *could* be. I wonder if it will be. 

These ghosts are painfully uninteresting. The guy playing the Ripper is horribly miscast. This needed to be someone who... who.... I dunno, is a good actor. He's not. Sorry, Pops. I mean, even Osric (who is an excellent actor) couldn't elevate that scene.

This episode is painful.

Are we still in this little town?

Ketch got knocked out, left alone with ghost, deffo gonna get possessed. 

Are we still talking to these ghosts? Why? Why is Kevin thinking he can go up against them alone? I'm not exactly sure what threat they are to him, can't he just disappear and whoosh somewhere else? I missed something, I must've missed something. It doesn't matter, none of this matters.

Okay, Belphagor says there's at least a hundred. Still, what would that be, like 1/2500000000th of hell? Why are the Winchesters, of all people, and now Rowena concentrating on this stupid little town----

Are. We. Still. In. This. Little. Town.

---why in the fuck aren't the most renowned hunters of modern time and their angel friend and the powerful witch friend and the friend with immense tactical knowledge regarding weaponry for supernatural shit not at the bunker strategizing and planning and... and... and.... I just.... 

Lookit, I've said this before: especially in fantasy/sci-fi stuff, if you are logical in every possible place you can be, if you nail the simple shit, then the audience is exponentially more likely to buy into the fantastical stuff, and also to be more forgiving (or not notice altogether) when you inevitably whiff, because nobody's perfect, of course. But this show in later years has notoriously screwed the pooch on the easy stuff, and here we are, in some needlessly convoluted mess right out of the gate in the last season ever.

::sighs::

Oh, look. Because of course he's possessed. You left him alone with a ghost. I'm neither a professional writer nor a psychic, I'm just thinking "What is predictable as possible?" and saying that. You try it. It's worked for me so far.

"I tried to heal him it didn't work" - well maybe he's still residually possessed. Or maybe you suck. Sorry Cas, you don't deserve that. It's not you. It's not me, either. It's them. It's the writers. I don't know what this line is about unless they're teeing up Cas to be even more neutered than he already is. I legit don't know, I can't think, I'm so irritated right now. 

"Nothing to hold you anywhere" - what? Really? Seriously? So what are you and Dean? Y'all ain't his family? Let that little badass haunt the bunker. He'd be the most awesome research assistant ever. Now THAT is a good plot point, have ol' Kev be home base, helping coordinate whatever's coming. Oh here we go, swishy swishy hand, magic hole, nobody knows why this demon can do all this shit, and Kevin's gone. Why? WHY. My idea is better. No way Osric would blow your guest star budget, it appears to be shaping up to be immense, especially with all the money you've saved so far on location(s). 

Shoulda kept him rest of season, let him assist, then his final reward is getting into heaven for reals when Cas (they'll probs kill him, tho) or Amara (maybe, seems too obvi a choice tho, and she doesn't give a shit about beng a ruler, we knew that back in whatever season that was) or Jack (because why not, it's the most ridiculous idea, since he's got the mind of a toddler, meaning it's something the writers would think is a great idea) or Billie (wild card guess) is the new God. Or have him brought back to life, fuck, I don't care.

So is the bullet trapping Chuckster on earth, is the question, and if so what kind of all-knowing deity puts a weapon in the hand of a potential enemy that could render him even a *touch* weaker? Where's the long game, there? What could any possible reasoning be? 

Okay, well, the scenes between Emily and Rob have been the best part of the episode, as well as the interaction with Ruthie and DHJ. Everything else fell flat. J2M seemed to be bored and phoning it in, and it's not often that can be said about any of those three.

I swear, if the preview shows that we're still in this little town for episode #3.... wait, is that the crypt from ep #1?.... are.... are we..... 

ARE WE STILL IN THIS LITTLE TOWN

What have we learned? Other than Chuck, no character development. The plot remains that some ghosts-interchangeably-used-with-souls from hell are trapped in a confined area, and it was via a tenuous spell provided by a demon whose motivations are unknown, and there's something up with that bullet wound. We knew those already.

(There's possibly something wrong with either Cas or Ketch -- or else that's something that will be completely forgotten was ever mentioned -- but we don't know either way and we don't know what it is, therefore we didn't learn anything; if this does ultimately turn out to be something, then we'll count it as a learned item for that episode.) 

So, minus learning that Chuck is weakened somehow and that at least for right now Amara’s not exactly in his corner, we're in the exact same place story-wise that we were in last week. 

And looks like we'll be back there again next week. 

See you next week, I guess.

=================================

Past posts, from newest to oldest (and I sometimes do addendums if a response warrants)

Episode 1

.

[victorluvsalice]

Forgotten Vows Friday: Favorite Moments, Part IV

It's my BIRTHDAY! :D And much like the 13th was the perfect day to talk about the darkest moments I love in this series, I think today is the perfect day to talk about the brightest moments -- aka, my absolute favorite favorites. I don't think any of you are going to be surprised by this list:

1. Forgetting You, Chapter 9: Splatter Gets What He's Owed -- Victor punching Jack Splatter and rescuing Alice from the burning Mangled Mermaid -- Okay, first of all, I like this chapter in general because it was one of the first I did after getting some solid writing tips from reading the first book of the Riverworld series (namely, "I do not want to write like this"), and I feel it represents a big jump in quality in my storytelling. And this particular moment -- oh, it was satisfying to finally give Splatter exactly what he deserved for hitting Alice! (Which is, uh, kind of why I kept doing it. XD) Not to mention I threw myself into properly describing the burning Mermaid and Victor's rescue of Alice, and I feel it turned out beautifully. (I still like "If the exterior of the Mangled Mermaid was a glimpse at Pastor Galswells's favorite vision of Hell, the interior was the full Time-Of-Judgment-Featuring-Dante-And-Virgil experience.") Not to mention I liked letting Victor play the hero for Alice, as she was going to be playing the hero for him for much of the rest of the verse!

2. Forgetting You, Chapter 24: Confrontation At Moorgate Station -- Victor punching Bumby during the brief moment he broke free of his control -- Speaking of satisfying moments where someone gets what they deserve. . .ooh, this felt good to write after Chapter 22! Bumby obviously deserves worse, but that moment where it becomes clear he never truly broke Victor -- well, Alice wasn't the only one bouncing up and down in delight. XD

3. Forgetting You, Chapter 25: Into Londerland -- Alice shoving Bumby in front of the train -- Obviously I have to include what is also one of my favorite moments in Alice: Madness Returns itself. I was so worried that he was going to get away scott-free, and then Alice took matters into her own hands, and it was great. And I think I did a good job in translating the moment into text, particularly Bumby's shock as Alice turns to face him as her Wonderland self. (Which he definitely saw her as, thanks to my Alice having a natural talent for a certain disguise spell. . .) Not to mention the exchange right before she shoves him:

"Could you kill a fly?" echoed in her head, the Dollmaker trying to get in one last shot from beyond the grave.

I can kill a lot more than that, she replied, and used her free hand to give Bumby one good, hard shove.

Eeee~ So good.

4. Remembering You, Chapter 13: Taking Back The Crown -- Victor defeating the Bumby Heart within the Wall, and regaining his memories -- Again, more satisfying moments against Bumby -- or, at least the remnant of him still left in Victor's head. The whole fight against the Wall, with Victor wielding Alice's weapons against the Ruin, was great to write, but the final battle? Victor clawing his way back from the edge of oblivion thanks to remembering Alice's eyes? The memory of getting the fork from Ms. Plum becoming the initial form of the Vorpal Fork? Victor staring the Heart down as it starts panicking? The "MY! NAME! IS! VICTOR!" line right before he stabs it?! *chef's kiss* That was so good, both to write and to read afterward. :D And then afterward, designing the first form of his Otherland -- the sweet little forest where his memories come back? That was a great way to destress after the fight. Just what Victor and I needed.

5. Remembering You, Chapter 14: So Kiss Me – Victor and Alice's first kiss -- It's their first kiss I'm not supposed to pick this? XD More seriously, this was a sweet and wonderful moment to finally write. And it probably helps that I took some inspiration from one of my favorite Disney movies, Enchanted -- you know how Victor picks up Alice and spins her around a bit? I had in mind Giselle getting spun around by Prince Edward when they reunite in Robert's apartment. (Yeah, I know, wrong couple, but I still thought it was a cute moment!) After so much time spent with them either pining but shoving down their feelings, or being utterly oblivious, or being in love but struggling past lingering mental issues. . .damn, it just felt good to have them finally smooch.

6. Fixing You, Chapter 7: Heck Though Ain't It Grand – Alice's reunion with Lizzie in the Land of the Dead -- I know this was one of the two "big moments" everyone wanted to see in the series, and I was more than happy to deliver. Mostly because it was a moment I wanted to see myself. Setting up the surprise of Lizzie being Burtonsville, not in Oxford, was a lot of fun in-universe, and the actual moment when the two sisters saw each other again – even I "awwwed" internally when they flung themselves into each other's arms. :) It was just so heartfelt. . . The follow-up hug between Alice and her parents when they finally reach the Ball & Socket is great too. Just – I know this is the thing Alice has wanted most ever since the series began, and I was thrilled to give it to her. (And this leading to the final defeat of that damned Jabberwock was a great bonus! Call that an "honorable mention" on this list.)

7. Fixing You, Chapter 10: The Grand Wonderland Tour – Victor and Alice's tour of Wonderland – Yes, the entire chapter. This is the other big thing everyone wanted, and, again, more than happy to deliver. This whole chapter is probably my favorite in the whole series, just because I had so much fun coming up with stuff for Victor and Alice to do in all the various domains! It was like a "greatest hits" of every fun "Victor and Alice in Wonderland" scenario I've ever thought of! :D Personal favorites within the chapter itself are the mine cart ride in the Village of the Doomed (it was fun going back to AMA, coming up with a special suit and dress for the mains for the "domain," and it was very interesting to look up stuff on early roller coasters!), Victor and Alice building a sand castle in the Music Fish's "Choral Coral" spot (that's my personal favorite bit in the Deluded Depths when it comes to the scenery, and it brought back fond memories of being on the beach and watching Mom make sand sculptures), the battle against the Army Ants (more fun with AMA stuff, and a good opportunity to show the pair's battle skills – not to mention, I love the way they got the Ants to back off in the end), and Victor and Alice's race through Cardbridge (again, my favorite level in A:MR, and them just getting to play like kids in this beautiful world was -- I swear, I was smiling and squeeing so much writing that bit. . .). But the whole thing was fantastic, and I think well-worth the wait!

8. Fixing You Chapter 16: Round Three: The Conglomeration. . .and Thirteen – Victor redeeming Thirteen, and the full creation of his Otherland afterward -- I like the whole sequence in Silent Burtonsville (Victor going Hysteria to kill the Colossal Nell when she threatens Alice is definitely an “honorable mention” moment), but the final confrontation definitely makes favorite. Victor and Alice finally recognizing just what it is he's struggling with, and Alice convincing Victor that the only one who sees himself as a monster is him, leading to him forgiving himself. . .ooooof. It just hits you right in the feels, doesn't it? The moment of him hugging his corrupted self, whispering that he doesn't hate him? How could you not sniffle, seriously? And then, after Thirteen's redemption back into Desire, the whole bit where Victor starts getting into what he actually wants his Otherland to look like. . .once again, had so much fun doing the descriptions! I was as enthusiastic as Victor about the whole thing! And Victor's joy at seeing the Living Dead Forest come to life outside the window? So much squee, seriously. Love it.

9. Fixing You, Chapter 18: A Day For A Glorious Wedding – Victor and Alice's wedding – Again, this is their wedding, I wasn't supposed to pick it?! XD I'm pretty sure we were all VERY READY for this to finally go down by the time it happened, and I was just thrilled to finally put it to paper. I mean, I'd had Victor's reaction to Alice's dress stored away in a "notes" file for ages, but to actually get them in front of that registrar, do the vows, go back to Houndsditch and have that cake. . .it did my heart good, seriously. Especially that moment when Victor hears Alice say her vows back to him, and all he can think is that he didn't want to cry. . . Even if it wasn't necessarily the most "romantic" way to get married, I still just wanted to sweep them up in a big hug and weep for a while. XD And then the reception afterwards in the Land of the Dead, with Victor and Alice getting a surprise party from their dead loved ones, Victoria finally getting a chance to see the place, June reuniting with her mother and meeting her brother, and the kids giving Victor his pictures back? I don't think I could have ended that story any more perfectly.

10. A Wedding, A Wedding, We're Going To Have A Wedding, Chapter 7: In A World Of Our Own – Victor and Alice's Wonderland reception – Honestly, the whole fic is a win for me (as probably evidenced by the way it kept growing chapters), but the last bit, which was a complete last-minute "oh hey, if I did a Land of the Dead reception for Victor and Alice, I should do a Wonderland one too!" is just – so full of fluff, I swear. I wasn't expecting it to be so squee-inducing and squishy when I first came up with the idea, but. . .Alice's Wonderland and Victor's Otherland merging like they do, with the inhabitants of both their minds teaming up to give them a party? Showing once and for all they've stopped beating themselves up about stuff for the most part? Awwwwww. . .the bit that really gets me, though, is the very last part:

[. . .] Victor turned to offer Alice his arm as the various citizenry hurried off through the combined woods –

Then paused. A playful grin crossed his face. "What?" Alice asked, raising an eyebrow. "What are – Oh!"

Alice automatically grabbed for his neck as he suddenly scooped her up into his arms. "Oh," she repeated, trying to get her bearings. "Er – any particular reason for giving me a lift?"

"Well, you're my new wife," Victor told her, adjusting his grip. He nodded at the join between their two worlds, the Vale of Tears and the Living Dead Forest mingling in perfect harmony. "Aren't I supposed to carry you over the threshold?"

Oh, he was such a sap – and she loved him for it. "You are," she confirmed, snuggling into him. "If you would, Mr. Liddell?"

"My pleasure, Mrs. Van Dort."

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHH – no I DON'T know why that affects me so much but it FREAKING DOES. It just – ooof. *flops* Best way to end anything about their wedding, I swear.

And that covers it! All my favorite moments in the Forgotten Vows Verse! :D Hopefully you guys saw a few of your favorites in here as well. . . I'll see you all in the New Year! With any luck, we'll get some more content for this world, and maybe even a few more favorite moments. :)

[meishamoved]

"I think the greatest power is belief, for what is a god without it?"

Book: The Gilded Wolves by Roshani Chokshi

Genre: Historical Fantasy, Fiction

Read for: characters/rep, dialogue, lyricality

Synopsis: Pictured.

TL;DR: Enjoyable; the 1st half left me wanting more, while the 2nd half left me wanting a sequel.

One of those rare books I had grand expectations for and, in small ways, it fell flat. Let's start with the not-as-good & work our way into the wonderful.

The narrative, especially in the beginning, felt clunky & disjointed, lacking a certain flow & finesse. I had to read passages repeatedly to truly understand what was going on. Further, the world & its systems seemed an incomplete picture, which is something I hope is elaborated on in the subsequent books.

The actual heist, while interesting in theory, lacked the sort of excitement/anxiety one expected to feel when implemented. This quality is restored in the second half, however, where I feel Chokshi hits her stride with the plot & seals the deal with an epic cliffhanger.

Onto the great stuff, because it's fairly great & enables me to forgive the above.

I may not be IN LOVE with the story YET, but I'm IN LOVE with the writing style. Chokshi is masterful with language & this book is ripe with picturesque phrases & magical metaphors. I'll share examples as my clumsy syllables do her no justice:

"...dusk-touched clouds, purple-bellied and dream-swollen..."

"She tasted impossible. Like candied moonlight."

"If you get in the way of a woman's battle, you'll get in the way of her sword."

You can see her wordplay is breathtaking & just *chef kiss*.

The use of the 7 deadly sins was exceedingly clever & the critique of colonialism, significant (seriously, read the author's note). The magic system, though somewhat underdeveloped, was also neat.

Yet, I'd say my favorite element was its characters. They were diverse, loveable, & multi-dimensional, each offering something unique to the story. Their dialogue was engaging & the bisexual rep made my queer heart soar.

So, though all was not golden, this aspect certainly was.

"...a broken heart made a fine weapon, for its pieces were exceptionally sharp."