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entropictome · 4 years ago

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Holiday Hot Pot

S:Final Fantasy XIV No plot or purpose. Just one man, his friends, family, his overwhelming grief and their very late Starlight. [mentioned non-WoL OCxThancred] 5754 words [ More FFXIV Content ]

“You look like shit.”

Moth’ir was missing his characteristic shades so all four occupants could clearly see the viera’s tactless comment send his eyes rolling. Five if the infant in his arms wasn’t soundly asleep. His comeback was snappy as always. “Thanks, kid. Thought I’d take a page from your book for a change.”

The Burn’s reaction was immediate. His rage coiled in his arms as he quickly changed stance. Ever one to turn to violence before reason. His voice rose as he started “,Why are you always-”

The rest was swallowed by a mitten plopped against his mouth. His smaller─but no less dangerous─companion shot him a long suffering look. Keeping The Burn’s temper under control was like trying to keep a lit match from igniting firedamp in a coal mine. Most folks had no hope but to abandon the mission to begin with. Ibuki was the sole exception. Though she could give him a good and proper dressing-down, it didn’t take much besides a sigh and disappointed look to upend his rampage before it started.

The anger didn’t go away, it just receded, but it allowed the pale and dark scaled auri to turn their attention back to their long missing friend. The three gathered around him with varying levels of interest. Leaving Havhen to flail helplessly as their presence was quickly forgotten in that of Moth’ir’s. Whom was obviously the more respected between the two when it came to their present company.

“You’ve been gone for months without word! We were really worried!” Ibuki stated, nearly whining with the intensity of her sincerity.

“We would have come sooner but there were a lot of things to take care of,” the Xaela man spoke apologetically. “There were so many festivals and trying to keep the bar staffed with so many people wanting days off and of course the Basement-”

Ibuki elbowed her much taller compatriot and cut his further worrying off by enthusing “,but Bukidai has dealt with all of it marvelously well so you don’t need to worry.”

“Oh?” Moth’ir looked at the Xaela with an appraising look. Though, paired with an easy grin, it was unlikely he was being serious. “Food baskets?”

“All delivered as of yesterday,” Bukidai, who was serious, assured him. “Thanks to our volunteers.”

“Volunteers is it? Did Mr. Auberdine show up?” Moth’ir asked and chuckled lightly when he saw Bukidai’s surprise.

“Ah, yes. Though we had to ask him to leave-”

“Because he was trying to convince everyone that volunteers deserved two baskets for their trouble.” Moth’ir interrupted, leaving Bukidai startled once again. “Did that every year. A few others too. Reason why I started delivering them my own damn self if I’m honest.”

“Every year?” Bukidai’s horror was indication enough that Mr. Auberdine had thrown one of his characteristic fits before he allowed himself to be let go.

“Grew up as a wealthy merchant’s son and then his family landed themselves in dire straights with bad investments,” Moth’ir shrugged. He was sympathetic but the sympathy was for Booker, not the man. “He’s remarkably less worse than he was but he’s never quite gotten over the idea he deserves more than everyone else.”

Bukidai sighed and shook his head. “Regardless, I think we can make do with our other volunteers if they want to pitch in again.”

“If you say so,” Moth’ir said dubiously. Bukidai held unto hope for dear life but Moth’ir had been divested of that a long long time ago. “Take care with old U’leh. Greying Miqo’te lady, very unassuming. She likes to troll through some of the donated items in Spring and Autumn for cakes to raffle off at her little charity parties.”

“She raffles off donated cakes?” Bukidai was aghast then pulled himself off the topic for another. “Spring is an awful long time away. Aren’t you coming back?”

“If you need to break out, we’ve got you,” Ibuki rose her sweater’s sleeve so she might flex her otherwise deceptively pudgy arm. Havhen─who had been watching their interaction with keen interest and was not familiar with Ibuki’s playful personality─shot Moth’ir an alarmed look over her shoulder.

“Contrary to whatever belief you might have, I am here of my own free will,” Moth’ir stated firm enough that they knew he meant it. He had certainly come of his own accord anyway. Staying was less than thrilling since he didn’t much care for the sole physician in this strange hospital. Divulging why was far more personal than he was comfortable sharing but he did add a “More or less.”

“More or less?” The Burn attention had been momentarily bought by the possibility of fighting.

Moth’ir gave him a stern look “,I’m staying.”

It was the right thing to do. More than that, it was where Thancred had left him. Left them. The four of them descended into an awkward silence. None of whom seemed particularly thrilled with the prospect.

Ibuki, hopping from one foot to the next, tried her best to break the quiet. “Is the baby yours? Bukidai said you left because you were feeling sick and had suspected but we didn’t know for sure.”

“Ibuki!” Bukidai chastised her.

Moth’ir gave him a solid kick to the shin. Which might have actually hurt had he been wearing anything but his slippers. He gasped and proclaimed with played up scandalization “What a gossip!”

Havhen was likely the only one of them who noticed the slight hissing. Something which indicated an actual irritation from Moth’ir he hid by dramatizing it.

“Is it a boy or girl?” Ibuki asked before throwing her arms up and blithely gesturing “,you know, for now.”

It was a joke that three of them understood better than the other two. Though she wasn’t aware of Havhen’s case. She had quite nearly forgotten they were there at all. Which was more or less in their favor as they were busy taking mental notes. Specifically on Moth’ir’s face after Ibuki asked her question. Moth’ir had settled into fatherhood like a round peg in a square hole. He’d fallen in but the corners weren’t right. Fairly typical of new parents but he’d taken his ineptitude as immediate failure and the guilt had landed him here in Havhen’s care. He’d only just been able to acknowledge his daughter directly at all.

Moth’ir visibly braced himself before muttering “,it’s uh... she.”

“She’s so cute! Can I hold her?” Ibuki thrust her arms out exuberantly. Either not noticing the stumble or too polite to point it out. Moth’ir handed her over mayhaps a bit too eagerly but the fact he’d been carrying her without needing to was progress. Havhen made a note of it.

Holding a baby was something Ibuki had enough experience in that she hadn’t needed coaching. Utterly doting, she looked fairly natural cooing down at the fussy bundle who had begun to stir due to the commotion and movement. Moth’ir struggled not to look miserable watching the pair, ears flattened against his head. Grief that went unnoticed now that all attention was on the baby.

“What’s her name?” Bukidai asked pleasantly.

“Doesn’t have one.” Moth’ir said flatly. Bukidai looked to him with confusion but Moth’ir waved him off and continued. “Her dad thought I should name her but I’ve been preoccupied and just... haven’t.”

Havhen distinctly remembered the white haired hyur had mentioned he’d wanted Moth’ir to name her because it might help them bond. And something about having already named two girls but that hadn’t been meant for Havhen’s ears. The concern of Moth’ir’s friends weren’t at all alleviated by the explanation but Bukidai had enough sense to recognize Moth’ir’s agitation. He simply nodded and smiled, if a bit awkwardly. “I’m sure it will come to you soon.”

Moth’ir brushed him off, glanced over at the window and the dwindling light outside. Whatever he’d wanted to see there caused him to sigh. He postulated “,You three didn’t really have a plan once you got here, did you?”

Said three exchanged glances that said they hadn’t and then all four heads turned to Havhen. The physician shook their head and crossed their arms in front of them. “Absolutely, not! This is a mental care facility! Not an inn!”

“It’s not like you’ve got any other patients and there’s not exactly a line waiting,” Moth’ir stated sternly.

“Nevertheless there are professional standards I have to adhere to,” Haven pushed back with just as much authority.

“It’s a madhouse,” Moth’ir exclaimed incredulously “,You’re already a joke and a half!”

“Not a madhouse!” Haven corrected him with a great deal of passion. “Those facilities garner their reputation by focusing on containment and are as like to cause as much─if not more─damage to their patients had they just left them alone. This facility is for study and treatment with the intent of rehabilitation.”

Havhen was a generally genial person but this was a subject they were particularly staunch on. Moth’ir, on the other hand, was just normally stubborn and exceedingly opinionated. Where the standoff would go was any one’s guess but it wasn’t likely to be clean. With that in mind, Ibuki interjected “,that’s actually quite fascinating! I’d love to get an interview with you on the subject for an article. Mor Dhona isn’t that far from Ul’dah, I’m sure some of my readers would love to know more.”

“You’re a reporter?” Havhen asked, scrutinizing the pastel garbed auri woman closer. “Publicity would be nice but your ilk are so fond of twisting things on their head for greater attention.”

“Well, you’re in luck because miss Bunji is far more partial toward fluff pieces,” Bukidai noted with a fair bit of amusement.

“Oh! I’m so tired of writing hard hitting news! Everyone is so wary of talking to me now but I don’t mean to find bad things! I’m just very good at tripping into them,” her sudden outburst sounded surprisingly sincere considering it’s absurdity. It had also upset the baby who she quickly went about soothing. “Oh! I’m so sorry, dear thing. It’s okay! Nothing’s wrong! You’re not running a money laundering business out of here are you?”

The last question was aimed at Havhen who simply held their hands up defensively. “If I was I wouldn’t be struggling to make rent.”

“You’d be surprised,” Ibuki sighed as she gently rocked the baby back to complacency.

Havhen considered the three newcomers and nodded approvingly. “Alright. You can stay for a short while.”

There was a short lived celebratory movement before Havhen added: “Under the condition you do chores around the building and submit yourselves for an interview of my own.”

Moth’ir balked. “Nevermind, everyone can go sleep outside.”

Havhen crossed his arms and said firmly “,if she’s going to write about my organization she might as well get the best understanding of what I’m trying to do.”

“I think we can handle some housework and questions,” Bukidai offered, trying to hearten Moth’ir whose grimace only deepened in return.

Moth’ir threw his hands up and shook his head but went to his next order of business “,Regardless, your kitchen stock is atrocious. Scribbles, go out and see what food stuffs you can pick up for tonight. It’s Starlight and almost sundown so don’t expect a lot.”

“You can count on me!” Ibuki chirped despite his sentiment and snapped off a salute unfamiliar to Havhen.

“You,” he pointed at The Burn “,there’s some weird creatures out of town. Ask around the adventurers, see what all is edible and how, kill it and bring the proper bits back.”

The Burn grinned and smacked his fists together. “I can do that.”

“As long as you can ask politely and don’t pick a fight,” Ibuki said to him as more of a warning than anything else.

“You’re with me in the kitchen,” Moth’ir nodded toward Bukidai “,let’s prep and you can see if you have any more ideas about what we have on hand than I.”

“And me?” Havhen pointed at themself.

“You’re on baby duty.” Moth’ir gestured dramatically toward his daughter, still in Ibuki’s arms who passed her off to them.

“Alright kids, we have a short amount of time and very little to work with. Let’s move,” Moth’ir gestured and his people went to do as they were asked.

Havhen and the child watched them all scatter. Before today Moth’ir had been antagonistic and withdrawn around them. This commanding man and the willingness of his peers to follow his direction was bemusing. Both attitudes were entirely alien from the way he had been with his beau. At least when he didn’t think Havhen was looking. Assuming different personae to suit different groups was normal enough but, when all was said and done, some of Moth’ir’s faces would likely have to die to save the host.

“It should be an interesting night for us, I think.” They cooed gently to the nameless girl.

--------------------------------------------------------

Havhen had hoped they might be able to observe something that would give them clarity on Moth’ir in the process of the night. What they happened to see was utter chaos. Babies need care and Moth’ir’s child was particularly fussy without any seeming need to be. A fact even her wet nurse had noted. Then there was the utter mess that Moth’ir and Bukidai were making in their kitchen. Which was adequate enough by Havhen’s standards but not theirs.

The Burn returned first. A bit bloodied for his trouble. He’d gotten a handful of strange looking material he all swore was good for eating in a variety of ways. Havhen had some doubts but Moth’ir took him at his word.

“Who did you piss off?” Moth’ir asked passively after getting a proper look at the viera’s nose.

“Some weird frogs, some newts, wriggly things, you know,” The Burn gestured toward his assorted meats as if the question in itself was inane.

“I said: who,” Moth’ir reiterated, pointedly.

The Burn crossed his arms and stood defiantly. Which unraveled under Moth’ir’s steely gaze and he finally yelled “,it was some roegadyn, okay? Didn’t like the way I asked and wouldn’t listen so he started punching. He was asking for it.”

Moth’ir shrugged and shook his head. He wasn’t exactly pleased but the disappointment didn’t stick. He said to The Burn “,Thanks for the bits, kid. Since you’re here, try and keep that one out of our hair.”

Moth’ir gestured toward Havhen, saying to them: “And you? Good luck.”

It was a particularly perplexing series of statements that cleared itself up over the course of a brief conversation. Havhen came to the conclusion that The Burn would make a good case study if he’d allow it. Alas, it was unlikely that The Burn would avail himself to their care so Havhen was forced to deal with him on a social level. Which was an exceedingly unpleasant task. He was combative, sullen, and downright rude without any self awareness. A hungry malboro would have made better company.

Luckily, Ibuki returned not too long after. If her strength had been in question, it was not now as she managed to juggle a notable number of boxes. Of which she was more hampered by the awkwardice of their distribution than their weight.

“What did you do? Buy the whole market?” Bukidai exclaimed as he started offloading her parcels.

“There’s a lot more in the market than food, you know,” Ibuki retorted. “I just got things that they said were edible and looked good.”

“Is that a whole dodo?” Moth’ir asked as he eyeballed what she’d brought in.

“Yup! The man said I could have it cheap because it’s Starlight,” she said as she divested herself of her last package. Arms free, Ibuki turned to Havhen and stretched them out to them “,let me see the baby!”

They could hardly deny her after she asked so passionately.

“More likely that the seller misjudged his buyer’s needs and wanted to offload it quickly,” Moth’ir commented looking the bird over. He’d found little wrong with it all the same.

“Oh! Oh!” She hopped back around to face him after having secured the baby in her arms “,I was thinking maybe a hot pot would be good?” Ibuki’s suggestion sounded more like the favorite child pleading a favor of an otherwise stern parent.

“I think I saw a burner for one,” Bukidai added with a questioning note. Indirectly asking why Havhen would have one to begin with.

“I’m quite particular towards hot pot dishes, myself,” Havhen explained “,I should have noodles too.”

Ibuki looked enthused for all of a second before she schooled herself back and asked “,like, spaghetti?”

Havhen gave her a sympathetic look and patted her and the shoulder “,I’m not sure I’ve had pasta in a hot pot. Personally, I’m preferential toward glass noodles but I have udon too.”

This suitably reignited Ibuki’s excitement. She nearly launched herself at Havhen, might have had it not been for the babe, asking “,you have a lot of stuff from Othard here, actually. Have you gone to Kugane?”

Havhen suspected the woman might be a tad homesick but unfortunately had to shake their head. “Not myself. The matrons of my clan told me stories of Yanxia from when we’d travel before the Garlean occupation. I believe it’s a short boat ride between?”

Moth’ir audibly hissed. A thing so uncharacteristic that it completely silenced the room a second and then was immediately moved on from. Moth’ir’s friends assuming it had been unintentional; like a sneeze. They hadn’t been told that Havhen had just happened to be Moth’ir’s long lost sibling. That their clan had once been his. At least, before they’d left him to die as a small child. But Havhen did.

They gave him an apologetic look. Divulging details about their clan hadn’t been their intent. It was an act which Moth’ir had very clearly expressed wanting nothing to do with. Their conciliation did little to quell the absolute rage that Moth’ir was having trouble keeping from his face. Cooking did though.

Havhen and Ibuki settled into chatting idly about Othard while the babe slept in her arms. The Burn─whose chaotic nature had been hard contained just moments before─sat calmly watching Ibuki. A man who was seeing his girlfriend in a domestic light for the first time and wasn’t sure what to think. Havhen rather thought he looked awed. The dining table they sat at and the kitchen were hardly separated. Only a partition that covered perhaps half the room from view. With The Burn preoccupied, he could hardly stop Havhen from observing Moth’ir.

Havhen had thought Bukidai might be in charge of the hot pot, seeing a Xaela would surely know more of the concept than a Eorzean born miqo’te. He was no doubt talented but it was to Moth’ir’s beck and call that he scurried. Ibuki mentioned to them that the pair had come to Kugane some time ago and that’s when Moth’ir had picked up some new techniques. Havhen was fairly impressed that anyone could simply “pick up” traditional methods from one trip but there was a great deal they did not know about Moth’ir.

Ibuki and his hyur “friend” had both spoken about Moth’ir’s prowess as a craftsman. The man had asked him to make a dress for their child and what he produced was of a higher quality than Havhen had expected. The act of putting the dress on the baby had helped Moth’ir acknowledge her and he’d since made several articles of it’s ilk. They had encouraged it because it seemed to be a source of catharsis for him. In the kitchen, Moth’ir seemed just as at home as he did with a sewing needle. Though these two fields were not the limits of his capabilities, Ibuki confirmed they were two specialties of his many interests.

He also seemed to be cooking more or less as a stress relief at the moment. As evidenced by the increasing number of plates Bukidai was producing.

“This is actually pretty early for us.”

It was a lovely little spread. Maybe more geared toward ten people than five. Ibuki had gotten her hot pot. Her eyes glittered despite the fact some of the ingredients used were… questionable in texture. It did look appetizing despite knowing where some of it had come from.

“Do you usually make so much food too?” Havhen eyed the spread and glanced to Bukidai.

“Uh…” Bukidai sheepishly responded, rubbing the back of his neck and then taking a moment to remove his neck tie as he’d suddenly become cognizant of it. “Yes and no? Traditionally, we cook a lot more but we also share with the neighborhood.”

“They do that at the end of every moon but Starlight is supposed to be special,” The Burn noted dully.

“Must be profitable in Ul’dah,” Havhen suggested without having any real clue.

“Oh, it’s all free though.” Ibuki commented cheerily.

“Who knew you were such a philanthropist?” Havhen remarked, turning around only to find Moth’ir missing. They stepped into the kitchen and found him sitting behind the partition. His head between his knees and both hands resting on the back of his neck.

“Gimme a moment.” He’d murmured, completely devoid of any venom he’d usually summon. He could only turn with a facsimile of it when Havhen sat beside him but the comment he’d expected to have to beat off never came. They simply sat there quietly.

Bukidai pretended to busy himself with the spread once again. Shooing Moth’ir’s clockwork toy off the table. He remarked “,that thing has a mind of it’s own.” A statement that started Ibuki and The Burn on a discussion on whether it had been set to follow the babe─since it was never far away from her─or if it was actually possessed. For that matter, where was the other one? None of the three had seen that one in a while. They only made indirect mentions of the man whose countenance both automatons shared. Neither Ibuki or The Burn knew what his relation was to Moth’ir though they’d seen him from time to time. Only Bukidai had any clue.

Bukidai who much preferred this to impeding on Moth’ir’s privacy any more than he already had.

They sat like that for a long time. The three younger ones chatting amicably amongst themselves while the miqo’te siblings sat out of view. After a bit, Moth’ir had gathered himself enough to pull himself to a more relaxed position. Havhen gave him a moment before risking a quiet remark “,they sound like family.”

Moth’ir only hmm’d at first. When he managed to speak, his voice was quiet too but the lack of force was from the palpable exhaustion that colored the tone. The kind of exhaustion unrelated to sleep. He replied “,Maybe they are. Ul’dah is a long way from the Steppes, Hingashi and wherever the hell The Burn fell out of.”

“Ul’dah is a long way from the Twelveswood too,” Havhen said gently as they could “,but you seem keener to keep your distance.”

“So many questions,” Moth’ir spat but even this indignation lacked fire.

“When one cannot find answers they are often left with nothing but questions,” Havhen replied pleasantly enough. It still pissed Moth’ir off.

The Burn was yelling about something but Ibuki and Bukidai were laughing. At his worst there was a request he calm down because he was disturbing the baby. Words which were also choked with laughter.

Moth’ir let them hang there. Content to sit and listen and not at all up to acknowledging what was a valid statement. He was supposed to be getting better after all but sometimes Havhen and their questions made him want to disappear into the swamp.

“If you don’t celebrate on Starlight, what do you do?” Havhen asked him, trying another angle.

Moth’ir sighed with his whole body. He tried to say “stuff” but all he managed was a weak roll of his wrist.

“You and your man must have some traditions?” Havhen offered.

Moth’ir snorted. The idea of Thancred being any one person’s was cute to him. Even after the hyur had confessed all those things to him before he’d left. Before Moth’ir had had the ability to say it back. Words that he so desperately wanted to say back. They pooled in the back of his throat and begged to be released so Moth’ir did something uncharacteristic of him and spoke about him. If just to speak of him at all. “Thancred’s not usually home when the holidays come around. ‘Specially not these last couple years but when he is it’s just a drink and then sleeping in.”

“Festive,” Havhen said with a chuckle.

Admittedly it didn’t sound like much but it had meaning for him. Maybe Thancred too. A tradition started nearly a decade ago. A rare occasion when Thancred hadn’t had any luck with any fair maiden despite his “silver tongue.” Too inebriated to make it to his lodgings but just sober enough to crash against the backdoor of Moth’ir’s home and workplace. Thancred almost looked dignified sitting there, looking like a misplaced gift from Nymeia’s Saint after Moth’ir’s very long and miserable day.

Thancred somehow talked him into one single drink for the occasion despite Moth’ir’s distaste for alcohol. So they might be on equal footing or some line of the sort. Though Moth’ir wasn’t anywhere near as intoxicated by the time he’d managed to dump Thancred in his bed. Then they’d passed out in a sleep near as deep as death itself. An act remarkable for the both of them.

All their important moments seemed to be in that bed. Very few─if any─had a thing to do with Thancred’s typical salacious activities. It was another sort of intimacy only available to them in the privacy and relative safety of Moth’ir’s room. Honestly and vulnerability that they’d not allowed themselves anywhere else. And yet...

“I didn’t realize you lived together.”

Moth’ir rolled a hand dismissively again. “Some of his stuff is at my place but I don’t think he lives anywhere anymore.”

“Too busy doing what he does.” Havhen said with some meaning. Near everyone who paid attention to the daily happenings around them had some conception of the Scions of the Seventh Dawn even if they didn’t know each member. Savior’s of the realm and at their center the indomitable Warriors of Light.

But Thancred was quite faliable. It was one of his charms.

“I don’t want to go back.” Moth’ir said so quietly Havhen almost didn’t hear him.

Havhen lightly bumped his shoulder against Moth’ir’s. “His life is largely here in Mor Dhona now, isn’t it?”

Moth’ir crossed his arms over his knees and pressed his eyes there to shut out the pressure from behind his eyes. He’d had some conception of Thancred’s work but it was something alien and distant. He imagined it was much the same for Thancred and Moth’ir’s work outside the Tavern. They’d known each other in a way that no one else did─that no one was supposed to─but they’d lived separate lives save where they let it intertwine. A special and private part of themselves tailor made for each other. It had worked. Might have continued to work but then Thancred had taken him from this hospital to the Rising Stones.

He’d met the women who’d given Thancred a shave and a haircut and found he’d liked them both despite that. Hadn’t recognized the man with the sun and stars before he spoke because he’d been missing the goggles and shroud he’d seen him in before. Lightly roasted Thancred with a Seeker woman with whom he shared new material to his friend’s chagrin. One of them would tell him if anything happened to Thancred while he was on the field. Thancred had assured him of such before he’d left.

And he’d liked that. He liked the idea that he’d be one of the first to know. He liked that Thancred had shown him context to the part of his life that had been a thin outline. But Moth’ir could never go back to waiting and wondering and subtext and half told stories they were too tired to finish telling because living it had been too much. He liked knowing and he liked being here and he knew he could never ever go back to that room. It’s privacy and false safety be damned.

He’d fooled himself into thinking he’d feel differently once he returned and started to go around the usual rounds but here he was. The same comedy routine fit like a glove but it was a glove that weighed as much as a buffalo and he was so tired. More than that: “They don’t need me,” Moth’ir said, choking back something that might have been a sob. Though he didn’t know why or what he was feeling exactly.

“It’s gonna get co~ld,” Ibuki’s voice came from beyond the partition.

Bukidai’s voice came after, raised suspiciously “,alright! alright! But make sure you don’t eat everything!” His added emphasis that the couple had had a habit of scarfing down an absurd amount of food returned to a normal pitch but the reaction to it was no less raucous.

Havhen shook their head in agreement and said “,Maybe once, but they do seem to have themselves covered now.”

“Wish I did,” Moth’ir breathed. Drawing himself up and closing his eyes, trying to center himself once more.

It was quiet between them again. The only sound coming from Ibuki singing over what was assumedly a well done meal. But Moth’ir broke the silence by turning to them and stating “,I never wanted children.”

Havhen cocked an eyebrow at him but let him continue on his own without prompting. So Moth’ir continued. “I did when I decided to keep her but I never wanted children. I don’t know how to do this and I don’t… how do we do this? I don’t know how to name kids.”

Havhen considered the distance Moth’ir had kept himself from his family and friends. They considered that he carried internalized feelings of guilt as if his abandonment was due to his own fault. The way he shied away from his daughter and the way he tormented himself for having done so. They wondered if “I never wanted” simply meant he hadn’t thought he should as if he was not worthy.

Moth’ir could simply have been asking for their opinion but the emphasis on “we” seemed like more. They did not know if he meant as keepers or as a clan. They weren’t sure if offering their typical naming conventions would be much use to him. Havhen offered a smile and said “,Oh, I’m not sure it’s all very complicated. You just pick something you think sounds nice or has meaning to you.”

Moth’ir sighed, clearly unsatisfied by that answer. Answers to a question that wasn’t the one he wanted to ask would never be sufficient.

“I think picking a name of someone important to you is suitable as well. As a tribute of sorts,” Havhen tried again despite the futility.

Moth’ir’s eyes stared upward as he considered various people whom he’d had some attachment to. It was an ordeal when one specifically kept people at arms length with few exceptions. “Can’t just name her Menphina, can I?”

“I mean,” Havhen shrugged and said flippantly “,your fellow Eorzeans might find that blasphemous but it’s your daughter.” They received a gentle elbow to the ribs for their trouble.

“Moth.”

“After your mother?” Havhen asked.

Moth’ir eyed him warily. Karga clan was very distinctly something that was his and his alone. It was never far from his mind that Havhen had only ever had their gods forsaken clan. He did not know what they saw when they thought of him and his siblings and his mother together. They all had meant the world and more to him and he misliked the idea of someone belittling that.

Havhen continued to smile at him warmly as he tried to assure him “,I think it’s a lovely name. And, from what your brother has told me, a woman deserving of such dedication.”

Moth’ir only knew that Moth’wo had trusted Havhen with the health of his brother. He’d not had a clue said brother and they were related by blood. How close the two actually were was a mystery to him. He hadn’t even ventured to ask so he had no choice but to accept the comment at face value. Or at least he had no energy to grill them about it.

Eased somewhat he turned his attention inward. He reiterated the name Moth in a whisper. More for himself than Havhen’s benefit. Making it real. Making her real. He closed his eyes and used it as a point to center himself.

Havhen ventured to tap his shoulder to grab his attention before holding their arm out, hopefully offering a hug. Moth’ir regarded them irritably but leaned his shoulder against theirs and allowed himself to be pulled closer. Havhen lightly pressed his head against Moth’ir’s and so they sat. Silent while idly listening to the other three while their minds were elsewhere. For their part, Havhen was busy committing the moment to memory. A small victory for them that may mean nothing but a memento of their brother when he left them for good but that in itself would be enough.

“Hey, you think she can eat some of this meat?” The Burn’s voice asked from beyond the partition.

Moth’ir snapped to, breaking Havhen’s precious moment. On his feet and away in a second. “You feed that baby anything and I swear I’ll kill you with my bare hands.”

Havhen let themself linger for a moment. Wrapped their arms around their knees and listening to the new argument. Havhen had been walking with Moth’ir’s ghost for over a decade. They’d been convinced of his death by their mother and it haunted them. But then he’d returned alive; so very much alive. That life had been a messy and painful one. Whether he cared to know or not, Havhen’s had been much the same. The mystery of what laid before them could very much be more of the same but that wasn’t the important part. That they were alive is what gave those lives meaning. Nothing more, nothing less. Which is why they allowed themselves a moment to linger and not a moment more.

A life must be lived.

And there was a hot pot they needed to get to before it was gone.

#My Writing #heirsofdiscord #Final Fantasy XIV #Moth'ir Karga (FF)#Thancred is technically here but also is he?

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yunohawkeye · 4 years ago

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-rolls in- Hello! A pumpkin here! I have literally just started following you! I noticed you like OP and FFXIV!! Could I request a fluffy scenario with an au-ra WOL with Aymeric. Them coming back from another adventure, sleepy cuddles?! If that's okay! (I'm also about to binge your masterlist) thank you!

Sorry for the long wait! But here you go!

I also just realized that I wrote it for a female WoL, not a gn one. I’m sorry! If you’re uncomfortable with it I’ll change it!

Pairing: Aymeric x unnamed WoL

Warnings: None

Wordcount: 961

It was already late at night, the cold Ishgardian weather slowly getting under her skin. Tugging her scarf closer to her face, she hastened her step. It wouldn’t take long until she was reaching her destination: Aymeric’s mansion.

The light of the moon was engulfing the streets in a mystical shimmer as the icy winds flew mercilessly through them as she walked. Seeing how peaceful the city seemed at the moment, you could almost forget it faced the threat of being eliminated by a giant dragon not so long ago. Her thoughts wandered back to the times where she fought side to side with her friends, against Nidhogg, against Thordan and the Heavensward. It all seemed so long ago.

Lost in thought she didn’t notice how long she had been walking, only realizing where she was as she was standing in front of an impressive door. The sense of familiarity overcame her as she looked up the massive wall.

Before she was able to make another step forward the door opened, revealing a face she knew all too well. Aymeric’s retainer, who was seemingly glad to see her, inviting her inside.

“It’s a pleasure to see you here, Miss. Unfortunately Master Aymeric isn’t back from his duties yet.”

Pausing in her step, she looked at the elder man in front of her, “He’s still in his office?”

With a nod he answered, “Yes. But it shouldn’t take long until he returns.”

The Warrior of Light looked in the direction of the Congregation of Our Knights Most Heavenly with a worried expression before uttering her next words, “I’ll be back later. Could I ask you to prepare some tea? Hopefully we’ll return soon.”

The retainer returned her smile with one of his own before seeing her off, leaving her out in the cold again. A shudder went through her as she tugged the scarf even closer. Ishgardian weather was cold normally but the icy wind on this clear night was harsh, even for her standards. She sighed and started to make her way to her lover’s office wordlessly and hastily.

She went even faster as she was nearing the Forgotten Knight, knowing she’d soon be inside the warm walls of the Congregation, her horns already slightly covered in snow.

A sigh escaped her lips as she found herself standing in the entrance hall, finally shielded from the unyielding winds and enveloped in warmth. But she didn’t spend much time basking in the absence of snow and immediately went for the door behind which her love was sitting at his desk, probably buried in work like always.

The temple knight guard already knew why she was here and made way, opening the door slightly. She thanked him with a nod before she entered completely, gaining the attention of the black haired Elezen.

Aymeric’s gaze softened the moment he laid eyes on her, smile turning sheepish as he saw her worried but also stern expression.

“Don’t even say it. I know I shouldn’t stay at work for this long.”

She returned his statement with a warm smile on her lips, “You never stop working if it helps people, do you? Well, I’m clearly not the one to judge when it comes to that.”

The Elezen was about to stand up, but was stopped by a simple hand gesture and her walking over to him. She took his head in her hands and pressed a loving kiss onto his lips.

A content sigh escaped Aymeric and his whole body leaned into the AuRa in front of him and he wasn't able to stifle the disappointed noise that came out of his mouth when she broke the kiss.

She stroked his cheek with her thumb, looked directly into his piercing blue eyes and whispered, "I missed you."

"I missed you, too."

He lifted his hand up on top of hers and pressed a kiss to it, tugging slightly on it and signaling her to come closer. She complied without any form of resistance, letting herself be lead onto his lap where she sat down, her other hand supporting herself on his chest and her legs hanging off the chair.

In this position she was eye-to-eye with him which rarely was the case.

She leant her head against him, exhaustion slowly taking over her body as she murmured, "I love you, you know?"

Pressing a kiss to her forehead, Aymeric answered with warmth in his voice, "I know. And I hope you know I love you, too."

The AuRa now wrapped both her arms around him and snuggled deeper against him, a sigh of comfort escaping her lips, "Of course I do."

Aymeric held her close with an arm around her waist and let his other hand trace around her body, caressing her horns and scales and tucking hair out of her face.

He looked at her now sleeping frame and was mesmerized by her beauty but he also knew that once she was asleep, there was no waking the AuRa up again for some time.

She really did sleep like a rock.

So he decided to just give in and put up with some back pain tomorrow to let her rest without worry for once. Here, there was no threat of Gobbuls or Svarogs that could attack her in her sleep. Right now she was in the arms of the man she loved, able to let herself be completely vulnerable and didn't have to sleep with one eye open at night.

And Aymeric wanted to treasure every second of it. He gave her forehead a little peck again and continued to watch her, until his own tiredness caught up again.

Yes, a little bit of back pain was worth this. And you couldn't convince him otherwise.

#ffxiv #final fantasy 14 #final fantasy xiv #ffxiv aymeric #aymeric #aymeric de borel

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thejackalsden · 5 years ago

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Alright - much as I didn’t want to do this, there are some changes coming to the MultiMuse as of today. Those are found UNDER the cut due to length of the post. If you don’t read it and wonder why something’s different, well then there’s no excuse.

The purpose of this post, however, for the part easily visible; I AM ON HIATUS. I’m dealing with...well, a lot. Some of it I don’t even know how to explain without being on a tirade, but just know, I’m on HIATUS until possibly sometime in July. We’ll see. Maybe sooner, maybe the end of this month, I legitimately do not know, I’m afraid.

Onto the less fun bits.

Regarding my muses there are changes hitting almost all of them.

Axel/Lea from Kingdom Hearts

Until @aeternai is ready, he is in an indefinite frozen state. I’m open to discuss writing with him, but it will be very, very few and far between. His mental state to write in, is rough. He will not actively be displayed on the blog, as he is not an actively available muse.

Gladiolus Amicitia from Final Fantasy XV

Another not often used Muse. He will be available as necessary for interactions in threads already happening; I.E. making guest appearances in my other muse’s FFXV verses. He is not available for shipping. I have tried, and he does not conform readily to any ship. There is one hidden on the blog for him, but unless prompted, it will not make an appearance, and instead will be side mentions and vague. Maybe an occasional drabble. All in all, he will make small appearances, nothing major, and is not available for most interactions. Will not actively be displayed on the blog.

Lunafreya Nox Fleuret from Final Fantasy XV

Similar to Gladio, she will make guest appearances where needed. Very rare, must be explicitly asked for before interactions. She is tied heavily to Cloud’s FFXV verse, so there will be side mentions. Will not be actively displayed on the blog.

Loki Laufeyson, a MCU & Mythos Hybrid

Due to the lack of interest for him, but the strength of the muse, he is still available. However; he will not interact with female muses. It is nothing personal as a mun, just how the muse works and has been developed over the years. No readily displayed on the Blog, but feel free to ask for him, he’ll still show up in the rules.

Lúcio Correia dos Santos from Overwatch

MY FROGGY BOI - He is obviously not going anywhere. I adore Lucio, I would love to write more as him, but he does fall under the secondary muse for this blog; due to the fact he is very selective at times. Feel free to ask for him, though!

Gabriel ‘Reaper’ Reyes from Overwatch

I thought I could maintain him on this blog, but due to the mental space that muse puts me in, both Gabriel & Reaper, I will be removing him from the blog. The old content from him will remain in place, but please don’t expect anything new for him, nor will he be accessible through Asks. Anything from here on regarding him, will be deleted, I’m just cannot write him.

Subject Delta from Bioshock

Due to there being no interest, he will be removed from the blog, loathe as I am to say that. I adore him as a muse, there just isn’t much I can do with him, I fear. He may make a reappearance in the future.

Princess Zelda from the Legend of Zelda Franchise

She has not formally been announced or introduced, however she will remain on the blog for use. I need to get her pages up still, but they are coming I assure you. I think she’ll be based more out of Ocarina of Time, or she’s going to be removed from any timeline and have remnants of each of her reincarnations. One of the two, we will see - that way any Zelda game is fair game, providing I do my research...

Angela ‘Mercy’ Ziegler from Overwatch

Has...admittedly mutated. Angie is a MAIN muse on this blog now. She has multiple verses; Overwatch, Apex Legends, FFXIV (Tied heavily with my Cloud’s), and a FFXV verse that ties in heavily with the Crownsguard, my Gladio, & my Luna. Do not hesitate for anything regarding this Muse. She is always awake; though if you’re looking for instant ships, sadly keep looking. Her main ships take priority; found in both @countrywestern‘s McCree, @grimesucker (She loves her trash boy okay?), and @zestirix (Ignis most definitely, I think Ardyn too, still working on that one) - but those ships will take priority. I’m not against shipping (Give this woman love damn it, let her love you) but it takes chemistry and a connection with the muns as well.

Cloud Strife from Final Fantasy VII

Ah, my sassy trash son. Another MAIN muse on this blog. However he is single ship with @griefandpunishment‘s Squall (If you don’t like reading Strifehart, I recommend unfollowing because these two get stupidly mushy sometimes) - the ship has been 5 or so years in the making (if not more, I legitimately don’t know how long it’s been) but all ships aside from this will be either platonic, or enemies at this rate. However, he also has multiple verses; VIII, XIV (Tied heavily with both Angela’s and Squall’s), XV - ties in heavily with my Lunafreya, and more! Feel free to ask for the sassy medic, though I assure you he has no interest, sexually or romantically, in any other muse besides a certain moody gunblader. Sorry.

Neova Lerouxisx, an Original Character

My baby is shifting to a Main muse. I have put too much work into her to have her sit idly. I’m going to try and get some interactions going on her, so we’ll see. There isn’t a universe she can’t fit in to - and she readily has verses for most Final Fantasy’s, Apex, Overwatch, LoZ (Tentatively) and more! Just ask, please!

Now to end with some FAQs regarding my decision, to nip in the ass any questions that may crop up. Some of them deal with questions I’ve dealt with from when I had anon on, others I’ve had asked to my face SO moving on.

Anubis, why are you doing this?

My blog, admittedly, is a mess. I have all this muse for certain ones - even more than what’s upon this blog - but I have found myself craving something....more. One offs are fine, but I thoroughly enjoy my threads that have heft and length - as if you couldn’t tell. That is easiest to achieve, and maintain, with 3 core muses I have chosen. I never have an issue with any of those three, and it’s easier for everyone involved. Plus it makes it so no one is waiting months for a reply from one of my lesser used or the ones I struggle to maintain, like Reaper.

Why are you removing -insert muse-?!

Short answer? My blog, my sanity, I do what I want. Long answer? Please see above and reread as many times as needed for it to stick, thank you.

I have caught grief since I started this blog; I know some adore the muses here, and some don’t. I cannot, realistically, keep putting myself in dangerous headspaces to write. Not with what I’m dealing with IRL. I have since stopped trying to appease the masses, and am shifting this wholly to my entertainment.

Lawl, it’s just writing, who cares?

As a writer who takes pride in what they do, and how they write, and to whom characterization means everything; how dare, first off. If you are a writer who doesn’t care, you are not a writer worth my time anyways. Elitist? Perhaps.

Or perhaps I know what I’m willing to put up with, and what I expect out of my writing partners - especially knowing what I put in for their replies. It’s the least I could ask for, this understanding.

Why is Cloud single ship?

Why does Cloud do anything Cloud does, let’s be real. He has a genuine connection with that Squall. They have been together for years and apparently gravitated back together. I get along amazingly with that mun, I can ping ideas off them any given day - and they understand my molasses speed some days ^^’ It’s why I’m beyond comfortable wrapping Cloud in a bow and handing him to her.

Plus, Cloud licked Squall so, y’know, it’s his.

#Out of the Den #About Anubis #{ This is kind of important won't lie #Some muses leaving #some shifting to single ship #some shifting on priority #It's a mess I tell you #But for my sanity it's gonna happen }

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zhauric · 5 years ago

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Character Profile (Music Edition): Asande Stormborn

For many of us, music is a source of inspiration for our characters, so I want to know what songs inspire and/relate to your muse! Choose between 10-15 songs, compile them into an album and tag some friends to share the beat!

*I am twisting this into something of my own creation. For Asande, this list is in chronological order and basically a story, background of her life from past to current. Please note some of these vids are NSFW due to nudity and violence. Lyrics are also a given. Mainly the Rihanna ones other than the first two.

Hate That I Love You - Rihanna and Ne-Yo

This is the beginning of the true shaping of Asande when she fell in love with the previous captain of her ship, Gareth Coldren. She felt he was everything she wanted and at the same time hated the fact she was in love with someone once again after being betrayed by her former love.

Loyalty - Kendrick Lamar and Rihanna

Loyalty was (and still is) big for Asande after her being betrayed previously. She wanted to know all that Coldren was loyal to. Was it her? Was it the treasures and gil? Was it to pirating? Where did she fit in the hierarchy.

Kiss It Better - Rihanna (Partial Nudity Warning)

Speaks to her lust and passion especially for the man she had fallen for at this point of her life. Despite the arguing, the fighting the desire and need overrides that and her passion controls the demands of her heart and mind.

Just Give Me A Reason - Pink and Nate Ruess

Things begin their change and she feels torn. is the love a lie, is there a reason for her to stay because she’s no longer feeling things are how they were and this she’s not wanted where she wishes to be.

Stay - Rihanna and Mikky Ekko

She feels they are going in circles. She feels he is her savior and he has a way to make her feel there is nothing and no one else for her.

Love The Way You Lie - Eminem and Rihanna (Domestic Violence Warning)

The toxicty of the relationship grows and she deals with physical abuse on top of mental and verbal. She walks a line closing her eyes to it, suppressing herself to it though the threat of her moving on is growing.

Devil In Me - Halsey

She feels a part of her waking inside. A part, a fire that Coldren has always known existed but has kept buried making her a shell of herself but she is coming to the realization.

I’m Gonna Show You Crazy - Bebe Rexha

Asande’s breaking point. She is told who she should be, what her worth is by someone else’s measure and she’s no longer wanting to be in a box of someone else’s creation.

Without Me - Halsey

The point Asande has finally had enough and takes her life into her hands instead of leaving it in the hands of another. To find who she is and to no longer be abused and used to someone else’s design while realizing all she did for Coldren to achieve while she remained stagnate.

Dancing With A Stranger - Sam Smith and Normani

The period after a relationship that held meaning in her life. The need to feel someone near her again has her reaching out to those she doesn’t know whether to hang around or to warm her bed.

Bad At Love - Halsey, I’m A Mess - Bebe Rexha, Sorry - Halsey

These three are grouped because they speak to Asande’s mindset at this point. She thinks love isn’t for her, that she is too broken, a mess and her walls are built guarding her heart from such for the better of any seeking more. In her mind at least.

Bitch Better Have My Money - Rihanna (Nudity and Violence Warning)

Asande begins unloading her frustrations in her pirating and sets a tone for her captainship to make certain none of the crew doubt her resolve and that is the captain they need and wanted all along.

Nightmare - Halsey, Nice For What - Drake, Bad Guy - Billie Eilish

This is where Asande is beginning to break all shackles, all confinements and assumptions of who and what she was supposed to be. She is embracing who wants to be and not caring about the thoughts of outsiders or imprisoning herself to the social norms. She is basically saying fuck that box you think to put me in *smiles*

Drink To That - Rihanna, Glamorous - Fergie and Ludacris

Embracing the party life and the materials that come with the path of being a pirate that seeks the thrill of adventure and chase of gil. Shrugging off whispers behind her back and any have ill content for her to live her own life.

Pretty Girl Rock - Keri Hilson, Break Up With Your Girlfriend, I’m Bored - Arianna Grande

Her confidence in who she is on display in how she carries herself including definite cockiness. She knows what she offers to watchful eyes and holds her head up high. Also despises being bored which she will openly tell anyone.

*No need for any I tag to do it in the format I have and I added more songs than originally asked on the meme. Just an idea that came upon me while putting it together. Probably won’t do the same for Kaelivh though *smirks*

Tagged by: @yokasaris @captainkurosolaire @yuki-yukichan My thanks.

Tagging: @divine-ruin @nihil242 @ivyffxiv @nocturnedreaming @seina-kurokiba @niomemizune @esme-selah @herd-of-halla @thorcatte @unabashedrebel @halcyonic-aether @silvernsteel @mteshi-ffxiv @carmen-ffxiv

#character prompt #asande stormborn #ffxiv highlander #ffxiv rp #music inspiration

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braden-ffxiv · 7 years ago

Note

jesus christ, is all of your blog just salty shitposting? get over yourself, just because you want to rp an edgelord doesnt mean you have to preach at everyone else to take it like a bitch, fucks sake dude, have some self awareness

Hello! I’m not sure how you may have come across my blog, but I’m sure you found something that’s kinda strayed from its original intent. I do tend to tag everything I post that isn’t explicitly IC or related to my RP content, to try to differentiate things for people not interested, but I know sometimes I miss other stuff. Sorry if that’s upsetting. This blog definitely began as a pretty discreetly IC and IC-related blog, but it’s kinda shifted gears as a place I can sometimes vent, sometimes post stupid stuff at @sun-storm , sometimes express thoughts on issues I see people talking about without having to intrude in a public space at all.

Self-awareness? That’s a river in Coerthas, right?...

You know, normally I wouldn’t even bother to answer something like this, but I’ve had a pretty rough couple of days, so I think I’ll take this as an opportunity to try to spread some positivity.

I hope people are having a good night tonight. I wanted to thank @synne-tove for the nice message earlier, and @neekaxiv for being rly cool. @elezendad always brightens my day with funny asks or politics posts or other wholesome funny things. @sagolii-snowflake has the coolest pirate catlady ever. Even cooler than mine.

Y’better watch whatcher sayin’ there, pal...

@bride-and-bride draws really nice pictures of her pretty, cute lizardlady and is generally an all-around swell person that I really like, too. @sonataofsteel who I only see so often, but has one of the coolest characters ever. @zevet-xiv is also very cool and tolerates both my stupid ffxiv people and my stupid politics posts and that’s really nice. I don’t know @lichface outside of notes I catch from stuff @sun-storm reblogs from me but she seems really swell too. @captain-rezalways posts goofy shit that makes me laugh. @garlean-nonsense always pops up on my phone when they post because that’s a really cool collection of garlean dorks.

Certainly not cooler than me, though... sorry love.~

All the people in the Thavnair discord are absolutely lovely, too. There’s too many to mention. @ayyymeric is obviously really great. I’m also glad the server gave Silly Noot a fun place to be nerdy about Thavnairian stuff, like she always likes to do. Everyone else, too.

obligatory shoehorning of my own thavnairian character here, he’s handsome

Ofc I’ve already mentioned @sun-storm twice and I’m gonna mention her again because she deserves it.

I’m missing lots of people. I just kinda went down my activity feed and looked at people I knew and mentioned them. There’s lots more. I don’t want you to think I didn’t think about you if I didn’t put you here. I did. You’re great. In fact, send me a message or a discord or an ask or sth and I will tag you in this post, or another post, or something, to let you know how great you are. That someone is always thinking about you, even if it’s just lil ol me.

I was going to end this with a quote, and that quote was going to be a quote of the quote from American History X about ending essays with a quote, but I figured that might be a little bit too silly. So instead I’ll just say to all of you, to the edgelords and the guards, the courtesans and their lovely benefactors, the garleans and the dirty savages, and everything in between. Smile and be happy.

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mai-takeda · 7 years ago

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Honest Q&A - Mai Takeda

What is your full name?

"Mai Takeda."

What do your friends call you?

“Just Mai. I mean it's not like my name is long or anything. Short and simple."

What is your favorite animal?

“Oh wow now there is a loaded question. You know, I don't think I even have a favorite. Maybe a kitten? But puppies are soooo cute too. Then you can't forget birds. I think I'll take what is a kitten for a final answer, Alex. Wait, why did I just call you Alex? Is that your name? No? Oh--oops!"

Where were you born?

“Ul'dah. We came here after leaving Doma so I was born right in these lands. My family really tried to keep the tradition of our homeland with me so I still know a good amount and then there are the books. You know how I love books, don't you? No? Well, I love books. I can't get enough of reading. I--” Mai suddenly clutches at her skirt and with a deep and heavy sigh. "Sorry. I can ramble sometimes. This whole interview thing has me a bit nervous. Next question!"

Do you have any children?

Mai's eyes widen for a moment then she suddenly begins to burst out in laughter. Her upper body shakes with the amusement of the moment and she begins shaking her head in response while wiping away a tear from her eye. "Dawn Father no! I haven't even been on a date yet!"

Is there a person/people you love?

“My family. I have my mother here and--" Her words trail off a moment. Her head dips for several seconds while she steels herself to answer. Pushing her shoulders back she looks up again. "And my father and brother who went to help the resistance in Doma b--but we haven't heard from them."

Mai smiles warmly suddenly and a reddened flush comes to her cheeks. "There is someone that I like though. I think, well, I think she's amazing and wonderful. I didn't even know I could like someone like this but I do." The smile dips suddenly. "But I may not be the one for her since there is another. Can we go to the next question please? I promise to be truthful."

What is your favorite colour?

“Oh thank the Dawn Father. An easy question. Red followed by pink. I can't get enough of either really! I just like bright and cheerful colors. There is enough darkness in the world."

What is your full occupation?

“I am a scribe. I tend to find work with merchants. When I can't I may go help my mother with her basket weaving but right now scribing is my main gil collection. It isn't a lot but it is keeping an inn roof over my head and soup in my bowl. Sometimes that's all you need!"

Despite her words Mai clutches at her skirt tightly beneath the table, invisible to any looking upon her.

Are you good at physical fighting?

"Well, not really. I am trying to get better with a sword. Smallish because well, look at me. Not like I'm winning any records for being the tallest woman any time soon!"

Which form are you best at?

"If picking up my feet and running was a form it would be that one!" Giggles softly with a bright smile. "I am still learning so no real physical form for me. I would put more gil on my ability to get out of a physical fight then me putting up my dukes."

What about magic?

"Now we're talking! Magic, the aether, all of it! Oh how amazing!" Mai's face fully brightens with excitement. "The way the magics weave whether one definition or another is--is--is, well, magical! It's such a beautiful thing if you can feel it coursing through you and channel it in the way you see fit. Having that touch with the elements, the aether. To feel it at your very fingertips! Can you imagine that!? I have been studying the various forms of magic for so long and using it in my own private practice because, well, I don't have a teacher.

I can't afford one."

Stops suddenly realizing the last words she spoke and bites her bottom lip in embarrassment.

"Scratch out the last part for me? Please? I--I don't want anyone knowing that. My mother doesn't even know and if she reads it," Mai falls silent with the excitement dropping from her expression.

Which type are you best at?

“I..I think I would say I have a blend of two different aspects right now though I have been working on healing more. I just hate seeing people hurting and not being able to do something about, you know? It makes me feel helpless and I refuse to be helpless. I want to help people and do what I can to prove I can be something more."

Craftsmanship?

“I find scribing to be a craft and I can basket weave. I do think I may look into weaving cloth. It would be good to make my own clothes after all! I see soooo many beautiful gowns and dresses that I wish I had."

Any other skills?

”Rambling! That counts! Okay, okay, I would see research and reading. I have to train myself so I end up pushing myself in those areas so I can have the knowledge I need. Smart idea, right?"

Are you an only child?

"No. I refuse to believe I am. I believe my brother is out there and he will come home to mother and I and we will be a family again along with father. So no. No. I'm not an only child."

Where do you see yourself in five years?

“Hopelessly in love while standing beside my partner and love to make this world better somehow? Is that too much of a dream for me to believe it is reality? Some would say yes but, meh, what do they know!"

Have you ever almost died?

“Of embarrassment, sure! Anything else? Nope."

Do you have a secret, not just a secret, but like a really big secret hardly anyone knows?

“I wish!"

Salty or sweet?

“Chocolate! Anything else is a lie!"

Do you like yourself?

“Oh by Twelve yes! I love myself. I mean I don't want it to sound weird but how can I love another person if I don't love myself first?" Mai's eye widen and she raises her hands, palms out. "Not saying I love anyone! I have never been in love! I mean other than what I just said about loving myself. And, well, loving my family. But I haven't fallen in love with anyone! Not saying I can't or won't fall in love because I know I could and hopefully will! I mean if someone loves me then I will love them back, right? I--" A red flush burns on her cheeks and she slaps her hands on over her mouth to stop from talking.

Do you believe in the Twelve?

"Yes," she answered behind a muffled mouth still not dropping her hands.

Are you religious?

Drops her hands and sighs feeling relaxed again. "I have been raised on the Dawn Father though growing up in Ul'dah I know and believe in the Twelve. Am I religious? To a degree but not a priestess or anything of the like. I don't think I could live like that. I'm not sure really."

Do you carry prejudice with you?

“Dawn Father no! There is beauty in everything and everyone in some shade or another!"

What do you consider entertainment?

"Hearing Taly sing!" she blurted out before again slapping a hand over her mouth. Breathing deep she let the hand drop. "Erm, I like reading, watching plays and sometimes just sitting in a city or town and watching the people. Seeing them interact, their dresses and everything is mesmerizing to me."

Favourite drink?

“Doma mint tea," she says sighing in contentment just thinking of it.

Do you have any family traditions?

“No..not sense my father and brother left," she says softly barely even audible.

Are you a good person?

"I would like to believe so. I try to be. If I think I'm not then I will just try harder!"

Thank you for answering my questions.

"Thank you for having me! I mean I know I can ramble sometimes so this couldn't have been easy. I bet I can wear that writing instrument out of yours with all my babble rabble. I just don't know how to stop myself sometimes. I get on a subject and I keep going and going and going and going. It's like endless! I think someone should make a sign when they hang around me that says, 'Mai stop!' and hold it up any time I ramble. Otherwise I'll just keep on going and going and going--"

Interviewer holds up a hand signaling for Mai to stop and her mouth clasps shut.

Tagged and thankful to the great @aurelle-ffxiv

Tagging @aethersent @divine-ruin @nihil242 @hellcrypunch @lihzeh @entrexlace @lalaliya @hearthsinger @talysings Sorry if you did it already! I tried to hit some different and new faces for me. Well some are new! Others just have to get use to my pestering :-p

#mai takeda #rp meme #ffxiv rp #balmung #meme

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angry-healers · 7 years ago

Text

Sometimes I wish AST wasn't as pretty as it is

Sorry, this is long and I don’t think it breaks rule 1 (correct me if I’m wrong)

So, I have a friend who is really bad at mmos who started playing XIV a few months ago. All fine and dandy, but he is not the best at mmos. He is one of those “I will do what I want for attacks and if people call me out, they are the problem” type people when it comes to these games, which is 100% frustrating because he’s not like this when it comes to most other things.

For the most part, I didn’t play with him and I assumed that he must have been learning decently considering he said that people on Primal had invited him to play with them and they had been showing him the ropes and it was really helping him. At the time, I played on Aether.

Cue some drama with my FC happening that’s totally irrelevant to this story (but could probably be submitted as a story anyways) and I move to Primal because I was done with that. Get settled with different friend, end up in nice FC, everything’s good.

So, new-to-xiv friend is like “aww I wish you would have moved to my server, we could have played together.” Feel kinda bad at the time, but I decide to see, “Hey, maybe he’s gotten a bit better since the other games we played together. People change. I’ll give him a chance.”’

He starts talking to me about how AST is his main and how he’s in love with it. At the time I have not much to say due to personal salt, and I just listen, thinking it’s good that he is enjoying himself.

Something comes up about how he plays AST as a DPS class more than a healer though, and at first, it doesn’t click. DPSing on an AST? Absolutely fine and all, and I encourage healers to at least try dpsing before they decide theyre 100% against doing it and let the end decision be theirs alone. I tell him that’s a good mentality to have and I’m glad he’s not afraid to try DPSing, especially because it’s much easier now to dps and heal.

Then, he says it. “Oh, I don’t heal. I just DPS. I play this as a DPS class.”

I can’t help but feel a bit confused a bit by this and I ask him “You don’t heal? How are you getting through dungeons without healing?” and he simply states that he just doesn’t go to dungeons. Weird, because he’s somewhere around 55, I think 58? I ask him how he leveled and he simply says that he grinds fates.

Well, his own thing, I shrug and tell myself. He’s not in the DF and he’s not inflicting it on people, and that’s all I can really ask of him without getting into a fight thats not worth it, because going into dungeons and refusing to heal wouldn’t fly in any group. And I wouldn’t blame anyone who refused to put up with that.

Flash forward to a bit later.

At some point, he brings up AST again and I’m almost afraid to ask, but I figure “I’m a sucker for this stuff, let me see what he says.”

At this point, he is healing. I’m relieved to hear that he picked up actually trying to heal, but it all slips away into nothingness fairly soon. It isn’t long before he’s slamming the other 2 healers because they’re not AST. I let out an audible groan, but whatever. He’s just being proud of what he is and maybe he just enjoys AST as his preferred healing class. I steer the topic somewhere else because I don’t need another speech about how I’m a WHM and I’m inferior.

Eventually we get to the topic of training, and I say I’m thinking of just spamming palace. He says he’s interested, I make a cross world party, and try to queue us in to 51-60. No bueno. He doesn’t have a 1-50 clear.

I tell him we need that out of the way, and he asks me if I can add a friend to go. I open up recruitment again, tell him to tell them the pass, and spend 50 minutes waiting while he makes small talk about whatever. I’m fine with wanting to chat about other things, but I’m just like “Dude, it’s been a while, is she joining?”

He explains how she doesn’t want to do palace and the two were just catching up. At this point I’m holding back my anger, but I try to be the good friend. I end recruitment and go to queue us with randoms.

Immediately he declines without telling me. When I figure out it’s him, I ask why. Apparently, he doesn’t like randos. I figure I’m 99/99 and I can easily do this, so I make an attempt. The two of us go in.

First 2 sets of floors are fine until the near end where I notice the following: He isn’t putting on diurnal. I tell him “Hey you should put that on,” and he just ignores me saying this.

We get through the 2nd set and go into the 3rd.

He still isn’t putting on Diurnal.

I bring it up again, and he just ignores me. Ok, maybe he just dislikes diurnal. Maybe he prefers nocturnal just that much.

4th set of floors. Alright. I can do this, I tell myself.

We hit 50. I tell him, “Oh, nocturnals unlocked. You should put that up.”

At this point, he’s apparently had enough and tells me to stop telling him how to heal. I’m so shocked I’m not even mad. I’m just completely in awe. I have to ask it at that point, “You know what your sects are for, right?”

At this point he’s practically yelling at me over mic how sects are worthless, how he doesn’t need them, how they’re wastes of MP, and why shields and regens aren’t beneficial to his healing style. He also takes the time to explain to me how he doesn’t “heal low content anyways” so he only keeps benefic 2 on his bar and if I “don’t like it,” then I can find some other idiot to babysit me.

At some point in the floor he hits a luring trap.

Sweet, sweet karma.

I watch him die. I don’t even try to hide it.

He whines that I wasn’t doing my job of protecting him, the healer, and I say "Huh, a sect and aspected benefic would have probably helped keep you alive while you dps them down" and I voluntarily take aggro before they can disperse. I purposely die and say “I have FC stuff to do now.” and I just drop call right there.

All I can say is why?

Needless to say, friend or not, I blocked his ass on XIV and I avoid talking to him about any MMO as much as possible now.

My fave thing about not blocking him on discord tho? He “forgave” me for this incident as he sees it as “no big deal, since it was clear I didn’t know what I was doing either.”

I knew exactly what I was doing.

(submitted by anonymous)

================

As long as you didn’t state actual names, it’s a-okay!

Also you don’t need a friend like that. I have friends who are similar. They’re really shitty in MMOs but fine in real life so I just don’t play MMOs with them. Games tend to change people. And your ‘friend’ seems to think FFXIV is like WOW or DnD where you can actively choose a path and play method for your class. A lot of F2P mmos are like that, especially those where potions are more high value than an actual healing class such as Elsword, Revelation Online and Blade&Soul. Those games also have leveling options that are mostly in the field rather in dungeons (well, except for Elsword but yeah).

If the first thing that came out of my friend’s mouth is “I don’t heal” or “I main X sect” or “sects are useless” I would literally go to their house, kick down their door, smack their face and throw their PC out the window.

-- Mod Mhi

#healer discourse #final fantasy xiv #healing horror stories #submission #notes from mod mhi #long post

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