#i love that finder makes honk noises..
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thinking about the experiments from lilo and stitch. so many silly designs,,
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Christmas Specials: Fishcake
CW: Some hint of dehumanization and references to Bahram’s depression/past breakdown at the end, some brief emeto references, but really this is just fluff. Oh, also brief unintentional ableism that Miah calls out.
Introduction | Siren Song | Cries | Here | Not Sure | Draw Blood | Fish | Signs | Stop | Something New | Help | Please Don’t Let Me Drown | Fish Food | Squeaky Toy | Fading | Fishcake
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BAHRAM’S NOTES
December 24th, 20XX 11:15 pm Mer in Residence: 71 Days
Miah showed up tonight with a Christmas present for me, and now I feel like a giant dick for not having anything to give her.
Christmas just isn’t a thing in my family. I mean, I have cousins who go overboard with it, kind of a fitting in thing, but my family never did. Baba does some kind of fast, but for Maman it’s just another day and for me it’s always meant mostly a day where I played video games all day because I didn’t have to be at school or work.
Oh, I need to call Baba and Maman tomorrow, note to self. She always gets worried about me right around the end of the year, what with how they figured out I was quitting school and everything.
I guess getting a phone call from a hospital leaves a bloody impression.
Anyway, Miah comes in with this big shopping bag in her hand, waving at me all bright and sunny and cheerful. She set the bag down long enough to berate me for - she assumed - having not taken my medicine on time.
For the record, she was right, but I didn’t tell her that.
Nearly drowning in saltwater made my lungs apparently terribly angry with me, so for the next eight days I’m on a run of antibiotics to handle a lovely case of bacterial pneumonia. Would’ve been far handier to get pneumonia right away, but instead I ended up in Urgent Care yesterday, paying 200 dollars and waiting two hours to see a doctor for less than ten minutes.
Dr. L says she’ll reimburse me the cost, but still.
Miah asked me how I was feeling, I said I felt fine, really, and then of course I had an awful coughing fit just to prove myself a wonderful liar. The coughing’s the worst part - every time I really get going, it’s like being underwater all over again. I can feel my lungs fighting to inflate, to take the air in, and I can hear how hard I’m working to get enough air to stop coughing at all. Miah can’t hear it, but she can see it all right, and she looked worried.
I signed, “I’m fine, it’ll stop, the doctor says it will,” and she frowned at me, but let it go, I guess. While she had her face turned away to greet the mer, I opened the pill bottle and dry-swallowed the meds really fast. Sometimes there are benefits to Miah not being able to hear things.
The mer - Kima, I can call him by his name in these notes, the ones only I see - was already at the side of the tank, watching us. He’s perked up a bit lately, since I started giving him live fish on the days Dr. L isn’t around and Miah brought him all these enrichment things. We’re doing what we can, but I know it’s still not enough.
Enough would be figuring out where his bloody family is and getting him back to them, but I just… I can’t even begin to explain, even to myself, the logistical nightmare of hauling a six-foot-long mer back to the ocean and finding someone who would take him back up north where his family likely is in the middle of bloody fucking December.
It’s the right thing to do, yeah.
But it’d just be too hard to pull off, not without losing… my whole taped-together life, yeah? Plus I’m still dealing with trying to figure out who exactly is my real employer at this point - who’s paying Dr. L - and what they want from the mer’s… thing he can do.
Miah glanced over at him and signed, “Don’t worry, I have something for you, too,” and Kima just looked back at her, head cocked to the side. She looked over at me and signed, “It’s a fish-cake.”
I have to admit, it took me a second to even begin to respond. My hands just… hung in mid-air, before finally I asked, “A what?”
“A fishcake. It’s like a fruitcake, but so much worse.” She leaned down to dig around in the big bag and pulled out a box, pausing to add, “I had to wrap it and box it or the car would have smelled horrible for days,” before she picked up and laid the box on my desk, opened it, took out something wrapped in layers of plastic, and unwrapped that, painstakingly slowly.
I glanced over at the mer, who watched with total fascination. Maybe he’d caught the sign for fish, he’s incredibly food-motivated. Which makes sense, of course, probably with his pod he’d spend a lot of his day eating and hunting for more, but
Bahram. Focus.
She was right - as soon as the plastic came off, I could smell it.
“How can you handle that? Isn’t your sense of smell… really good?” Ah, yes, I am always so proud of myself when I forget a sign for a word I want to say and have to sort of cobble together the spirit of it with other signs.
She looked at me with this sort of dry are you kidding me expression, then signed, “I’m deaf, B, not a superhero,” in a way that made me feel about ten inches tall.
“Sorry. That’s an awful smell, though.”
And it was. I like fish as much as the next man, but this was foul. She grinned at me and picked up the tupperware the fishcake was in using towels to protect her hands from picking the smell up too, I guess, and went over to the ladder up to the platform. Her back was already to me, so I couldn’t ask her the question I had, or tell her not to do that one-handed. Instead, I just sort of… got up and hovered uselessly while she climbed up without looking back, and then followed her up there.
The platform makes me… nervous, now. I stay closer to the ladder, farther from the water. I hope the mer, that Kima doesn’t think I don’t want to be close to him or something.
Miah took the lid off the tupperware and waited. Soon enough the mer popped up near us, interested in what we were doing on the platform.
I watched those nasal slits open wide when he smelled the fish. And I watched how his eyes went big and shiny with excitement. Whatever Miah had put in the foul thing, he wanted it.
She dumped it into the water - I didn’t see much, other than a sort of loaf-shape and a sense of texture I never want to think about again - and Kima tore into it. It was the grossest thing I’ve ever seen, and I have actually watched Kima eat raw fish that was living seconds before. I had to look away - and so did Miah, but she was laughing. She can’t hear herself, only feel the vibration in her own throat. Her laughs kind of sound almost honking, choked-off, just totally un-self-conscious noises she’s barely aware of.
I should tell her that I like the way she laughs.
Oh, I absolutely should not do that.
Maybe I should, though.
She grinned at me, still laughing, and signed, “This is disgusting!”
“It is,” I signed back, “And it’s your fault, don’t forget that!”
She was still laughing when Kima looked back up at us, fish bits smeared around his mouth, and she signed, “Merry Christmas, K-I-M-A,” to him. He stared back, signed yes, and then dove back under the water, present utterly devoured, leaving only gross little particles I will probably have to hose off the sides of the tank on cleaning day when the filters can’t quite pick them up.
Miah looked at me, and I just thought, you know, she’s really pretty even under the sun lamps, and nobody is pretty in that light. Then she signed, after this moment of stillness, “I bought you a present, too.”
“Me?” I pointed back at myself, blinking, surprised. “I don’t do Christmas, M, I’m sorry.”
She shook her head. “I know. But I still bought a present. Can I show you?”
“Um, sure.” I get nauseous when I’m nervous. For a second, climbing back down the ladder, I thought I’d just get sick all over myself. I was badly designed, my defense mechanism is just to vomit on myself to scare predators away, clearly my body thinks pretty women are dangerous and I have to embarrass myself until they stop looking at me.
Finally, though, we were back at my desk. The smell… lingered. I’ve since burned the candle Miah got me, and the sulfur from the matches and the scent of the candle itself have largely done away with it, but when we got back, it was still powerful.
She didn’t pull anything out of the bag, instead she just took a small card out of her back pocket and handed it to me.
I looked down at it. “Alborz?” I realized I’d spoken out loud, looking down, and looked back up quickly so I could repeat it in sign, so she could see. “A-L-B-O-R-Z? A gift card to a restaurant?”
She nodded, quickly, signing so fast I was having trouble keeping up. I guess… was she nervous, too? “It’s food like you grew up with, yes?”
“Yeah, more or less. I mean nothing is better than my mother’s food. But why-”
She reached out and grabbed my arm with one hand to stop me, leaned in so close that the smell of this super subtle perfume she wears was stronger, for a second, than the smell of fish. “B,” She signed, with heavy, slow emphasis, “Think about why I bought you this.”
I just looked at her. I didn’t get it at all, and told her so.
I’m so bloody dense.
She sighed, throwing her hands up in the air with an eye-roll and a smile, and then signed, “When are you taking me there?”
She had to repeat the signs three times before I realized she was asking me on a date.
So anyway, I don’t think I’ll sleep a wink tonight, and also I think I celebrate Christmas now.
Date-mas.
That was an awful joke. I’m leaving it there just to properly shame myself if I ever reread this.
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@astrobly @burtlederp @finder-of-rings @slaintetowhump @moose-teeth @misspelledwitch @whumpfigure @whumptywhumpdump @boxboysandotherwhump @whumpywhumpwhump @yet-another-heathen @fanmanga1357-blog @justabitofwhump
#mer whump#christmas specials#signs of the sea#depression tw#breakdown mention tw#emeto references#mer whumpee#fluff#angst and fluff#all comfort no hurt#referenced drowning#bahram anvari#miah kirsse
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Bring Them Home Ch 15 Smash
This fic is slow going with everything but going. Kept this baby as a draft until I wrote the next chapter :D
Alex, Michael, and Isobel bond and talk! Enjoy 💛
Read on AO3
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They get their 3 hours and a little bit more until Michael finally becomes the voice of reason.
"As much as I want to spend the rest of the day with you, I need to check in with Sanders and do my actual day job. Plus Izzy is nothing but greedy for all the attention on her."
Alex just gives him a look before dragging Michael back onto the bed and rolling to be on top.
"This is a once in a blue moon lazy day for me Michael. You give me another hour and then I'll be satisfied."
Their first hour was the nap after their call, Michael carrying a dozing Alex to his bed so they'd be more comfortable. The second was Michael thoroughly massaging Alex's full body after Alex does his at home PT routine. The third was them switching between kissing and talking.
Michael wouldn't mind the third hour becoming 2 straight hours of more talking and kissing. He also doesn't think he can move because Alex is pretty much the ideal weight for holding him down.
Then the small touches start. One hand moving to his neck as a thumb swipes up and down his throat slowly before it moves to sink into his curls. Fingers gently digging into his scalp as lips press randomly across his torso and above. Michael is in actual heaven as he loses time to Alex's devoting touches until his left hand cramps and he lets out a hiss from the pain.
Lifting up Alex gives him space to do whatever he needs, his face pinched in worry and flickers of guilt at seeing Michael cradle his hand.
"Do you need a heat compress or acetone for the pain?" Alex quietly asks but Michael shakes his head.
"It'll pass. Give it a minute."
Hesitantly Alex reaches for it and let's the tips of his fingertips rest ever so lightly on the ridges of the scarred skin that Michael barely feels as Alex traces it. Michael lifts his hand up to feel the pressure and warmth of Alex’s hand but Alex snatches it away.
“Doesn’t it-” Alex's voice was quiet and a bit hoarse. “I don’t want you to hurt. I was trying to-” He stops himself again with his words stuck as old guilt starts to consume him.
Sighing Michael sits up but keeps his hands to himself.
“You think we’re ready to talk about this?” He waves his left hand between them.
He gives Alex a good minute to breathe through what he’s feeling right now before slowly inching his right hand to the thigh resting next to his.
“I am but that’s cause I made peace with it a long time ago. If you’re not then we can put it on hold for another time but you didn’t do this to me, you’re not a monster or violent like him. I’m not gonna lie, it reminds me that there’s bad in the world, that it’s cruel and doesn’t care but,” His hand has traveled up and cups Alex’s cheek. “It also reminds me that there are kind people like you who somehow left me a medical kit even though I didn’t see you for a week because you were hurt too. That wanted me to get help and go to the hospital but found an alternative when I kept telling you no.”
Alex’s eyes fall closed as he leans into Michael’s hand.
“You’re lucky your antibodies are immune to human infection and diseases.” Is the only thing he can say.
“Pretty nice that my form of power boost is just 5 bucks a bottle too, though my personal brew is much better.” Michael raises his left and holds it in front of Alex. “You didn’t need to go and make us a matching set but of course you had to one-up me.”
All he gets is a soft noise from Alex who’s finally reached for his left hand, both of his cradling Michael’s like it’s precious as he brings it to his chest to lay right over his heart. The steady thump is a song he’s missed.
“You could’ve healed it but you didn’t want to. You wanted to remember the good and the bad.”
Michael snorts at that. “I mean Max only offered like once but it also would’ve become a thing if people found out. Even though I didn’t know how much your dad was actually watching us, I didn’t want to give him anymore reasons to start snooping around. Hey you think he knew before and that’s why he went psycho?"
He asks it like an actual question, one of pure curiosity because now with everything they know it might actually be true.
"Maybe but I knew regardless he'd do something to anyone I brought home. Sure it was like an open secret but I tamed it down around him, the eyeliner and punk was just the easiest way to be proud but on just the edge. It helped that he hated both."
Michael watches as Alex's face pinches again.
"Would you heal it now or like a partial one?"
Smiling Michael just rubs his thumb against Alex's chest.
"Don't know. Depends really."
He pulls Alex back down and holds him close, soaking up as much comfort and the feeling of safety, love, and peace.
Of course not 10 minutes later there's a honk and a mental nudge from Isobel.
"Nooooo." He groans and buries his face in Alex's hair.
Alex agrees and presses closer as their phones start ringing.
"How is she calling both of us!"
There's a knock at the door then the sound of intentionally loud footsteps that stop at the window of their room.
"I promised lunch."
"We could be having really kinky sex right now Iz."
"Oh that reminds me I need to find a new playmate. Alex we're going to a gay bar. I want to see if me going all obsessed over Rosa was a me thing or his and I need a wingman who gets me."
Michael makes a face and holds onto Alex tighter. He doesn’t want Alex going to any bar without him.
"In my professional opinion it might be too soon and you're technically still married but screw it let’s go have fun." Alex pauses and reconsiders his words. “Actually if anything Kyle might be more game then me. I may be out and proud but I kinda dislike people… and crowds now.”
He gives Michael a deep but short kiss and starts to wiggle free. Michael makes a valiant attempt to keep him in bed which is funny because earlier he was trying to head out for work and be responsible. He flips them over and tries to distract Alex with more kisses and he can feel Alex starting to give in when Isobel knocks on the window.
"We still game to blow up stuff or was that just the land around the cabin? Also will someone please let me in!"
They both groan and finally scramble out of bed to put pants on. Michael turns to face where the front door is and glares at it until it opens.
“It’s open.”
“Lovely. I’ll bring my stuff in.”
Michael slips down to slide on the sleeve then prosthetic for Alex before waddling closer to wrap his arms around Alex’s waist so he can bury his face in a very warm stomach.
“No bar without me. Someone’ll snatch you up.”
The vibrations and sound of Alex’s quiet laugh is nice.
“I was being honest about not really liking bars Michael and I'm only a tiny bit better about people. Have no fear everyone will be flocking to your sister.”
Silently Michael stands before climbing into Alex’s lap and latches onto him like a koala.
“Jesus I forgot how clingy you are.” Alex teases as his hands settle on Michaels sides. “Not that I mind.” He adds.
Leaning back to face each other, Michael gives him a dramatic pout. “You’re hot stuff and people will absolutely flock to you. I can’t stop people from looking but I can at least stop them from touching.” He eyes Alex’s neck hungrily and starts to lean down but a hand in his hair stops him.
“Ah and the marking thing. You sure you’re not a vampire?”
“It won’t be like-”
The unamused look Alex is sporting just makes Michael grin smugly. “You made it go around my whole neck. You gave me an actual hickey necklace Michael and it lasted for a whole week. No hickey necklace.”
“What about like two where everyone can see?” Michael questions and his eyes stare at the perfect spot. “I’ll keep them small.”
They roll over with Alex keeping him pinned down.
“You and I have a very different idea of what small is. No hickeys or marks until we go on another date.” He kisses Michael’s cheek before rolling off and leaving to go see what Isobel’s up to.
Michael mopes and gets dressed slowly. If the hoodie he has on is unusual for him well it’s Alex’s fault for leaving it in the room. In the closet and folded up top but Michael found it so finders-keepers.
“Michael you're staying 20 minutes so you can praise me while I break stuff with my mind." Isobel eyes the sweater and frowns. "Are you having a mental breakdown? That's the only time we wear hoodies." She comments and takes a step closer, ready to bring Michael into a hug for comfort which kinda confuses him.
"Um no. I'm good Iz. Just claiming one of my rights to wear something of Alex's." Michael pauses before taking his own step forward in concern. "Are you good? I know I haven't fully been there for you with everything but if you-"
Isobel rolls her eyes at him.
"I'm a big girl. It's been…. A lot but Alex and the others have helped in their own way. I do know breaking all this stuff will feel good so come on teach me how you do it." She says as she pats his shoulder then heads to Alex's backyard, Michael quickly following her.
"You're sure?" He asks. "I know we all have a tendency to avoid actually talking about our shit so if there's anything you want to then I'm here."
The tight line of Isobel's lips hold for a few seconds before dropping as she sighs.
"I'm still mad and hurt. Also sad because I- this whole mess started with him and I was just a tool he used. I was finally starting to feel like I could be myself but even that's a lie. First it was thinking I was the one who killed everyone and that sucked but finding out the actual truth was worse." Her voice wobbles a bit before she takes a deep breath to steady it. "I know I'm not okay and we're all dealing with our own shit but for once I don't feel totally alone. I'm gonna try and be a better sister to you because you've always been there for me Michael, you carried what happened that night with you for a decade so I wouldn't have too. I've let myself follow whatever Max decided because we got to grow up together and I thought he was right, that he was protecting us and the normal life we had."
She swallows and her eyes dart away.
"And he was but that meant you were left out because you never got our type of normal. So I'm gonna work on being there for you too and making sure you're included. Now let's go break stuff."
Michael grabs onto her hand and squeezes it. Isobel squeezes back and both their eyes are a bit misty but the smiles they wear are bright.
They see Alex a couple yards out, placing items from the box Isobel brought around his open backyard.
“Whatever you break you also clean up so I would suggest a tarp or something.”
Michael swaggers over and latches onto his side, nuzzling into his neck.
"Of course gotta keep the place clean. I'll go grab one." He leans to take a sip from Alex's milkshakes but it's moved away.
"You hate mint."
Michael blinks at him and can't help how big his smile turns.
"I don't mind it when it's from you." His eyes land on Alex's lips in an obvious request.
Michael's curls slap him in the face.
"Ow Iz why!"
"What? I'm just practicing my power." Her sickly sweet voice and eyelashes fluttering says anything but.
Michael rolls his eyes and pecks Alex's check. "You get thirty minutes and then I have to head to Sanders."
A hand slides into the back pocket of his jeans and he's pulled closer to Alex's side.
"Whatever you don't break or wanna leave to burn will be our bonding time."
Isobel's eyes light up at the offer.
"You really weren't lying about getting to explode shit! Like actual explosives?" She grabs onto Alex slowly and starts tugging him back to the house so he can show her.
Michael doesn't let go and they all walk back inside relatively easy for the three of them latched onto each other.
"More like I have the basic materials needed to make bombs which you would be surprised on how easy they are to make." Alex comments as Michael gives an understanding nod.
"Though I do have some minor explosives that are probably closer to fireworks which are easier to clean up after and that can easily be stated as such."
Alex slips out of their arms and goes to the small closet hidden behind the bathroom, the three of them bring all the goods to the living room.
"Does this mean I can use you as an excuse to come here instead of my mother's Fourth of July barbeque? I'm always stuck talking about nothing and everyone keeps expecting me to be pregnant. Do I look like mother material to you?"
She's settled in Michael's lap as they hold each other comfortably. Michael rests his head on her shoulder as he chuckles.
"Hmmm you're more Aunt material. You'd spoil my future kids rotten but also make sure they know how to talk circles around people the second they learn how."
"Their first words will be aunt Izzy or some variation of that. I'm not picky."
Her tone is casual but her eyes don't leave Alex who's gone quiet.
"I'm not saying a hard no to possibly being a surrogate but in a few years ask me again. I'll be back, just need to use the bathroom." She glides off of Michael's lap and out the door.
Michael doesn't pay her any mind and flops back to lay back on the bed.
The thought of having kids have been an off and on thing for him. Sometimes he doesn't because he's not even human and not the stablest person, being in the system didn't do him any favors. There's so much entailed with it that if he ever did he's worried the poor kid will turn out worse than him, that Michael won't have or be able to provide what they'll need. Then there are days he'd love to be that parent for someone who needs it, to be who he needed as a kid. Save at least one kid from a bad situation. Have the type of family he's sometimes let himself dream and barely hope for.
Sometimes it's just him raising a kid alone but other times Alex is there too, both of them sharing the love they have with someone else who might need it. Alex would never be like his father and would give their kid everything they needed no matter what but also make sure they have boundaries and morals and good life lessons.
"Would you want kids Alex?"
Michael voices once he's brought back to the present.
Just because he wants kids doesn't mean he needs them. He knows better than anyone that you gotta be committed and ready for that type of responsibility.
There's always the future but for right now he just wants to get his mom and people free, to deal with Noah, and to be with Alex.
"In another life… yes but I'm not sure about this one." Alex gets this nervous look on his face before sighing. "I'd have to think about it."
That's pretty much on par what Michael knew he'd say.
"Do you- I mean obviously you do but I'm not-"
Michael uses his powers to tug Alex to him. He takes Alex's hands and gives a light squeeze.
"I do but not now or for a while. I want to get my mom out and deal with the insanity of our lives first then enjoy being with you. I would like them in the far far future but I don't need them. I'm not letting some punk take all your attention until I've gotten my fill."
Alex clings to him and nods.
"Okay."
"As of now I love you and my meddling sister. You can come back in Isobel."
She walks in stubbornly with her head held high.
"I didn't mean to bring up future kids. You did that all on your own Michael and I'm sure you'll both be amazing uncles when Max and Liz figure their shit out. Max will finally have a reason to quit the force and stay at home to write like he's always wanted while Liz works on saving the world and all that jazz."
She grabs all the explosives quickly and carefully to do something with her hands.
“I mean who wouldn’t want an adorable hybrid of me though right, the world would all but perish under our reign. I’m sure i’d be a good mom though… with time and everyone else’s kids as a trial but like you guys said, now is a horrible time.” Her voice lowers to something almost hushed. “I’m sure plenty of kids need a home once i’m ready so all we need to do now is learn and be as prepared as possible.”
Michael smiles fondly at her as he stands and wraps an arm around her waist, pressing his forehead to the side of her neck.
“There’d be nothing stopping you once you decide your ready Isobel.”
Alex leans into her other side and they all just take a moment to breathe together.
“When we’re ready.” Alex voices with hope and it brings a smile to all their faces. “Does that mean we’re ready to go blow stuff up now?”
That gets a laugh.
“Come on all this emotional talk is ruining the mood. I’m ready to see how much control I need to learn to beat Michael!”
The three proceed to smash, break, and explode the contents of Isobel's boxes while enjoying their lunch.
Isobel is a bit shocked and proud of how much control Michael has on his power. A bit jealous too but she’s only just started. She finds it sickeningly sweet how awed Alex looks when he looks at Michael but the kind one he gives her makes up for it.
“How did I not see it?” She asks them. Her tone is light with wonder. That she never saw how much love just poured from them. It’s been a decade and she’s only finding out now.
Both Alex and Michael sigh but there’s less of a haunted look in their eyes.
“Shit timing and even worse communication.” Michael voices and then he’s at Alex’s side. “It’s hard to have something when everything’s going against you.”
Alex nods with his face set in a hard look before it clears.
“We kept it to ourselves cause it was safer but now there’s less bullshit to fight against.”
Isobel hurts from even the idea of what they’ve been through, the flashes she’s gotten from Alex flickering before she lets it all go.
“Well you’ve got someone else on your side.” she stands tall again, stronger and more solid with this certain topic worked through. "I'd happily melt anyone who's brain keeps giving you guys trouble. I'm sure I can make it look like an aneurysm."
She’s trying to be reassuring but the pained and overwhelmed look on Michael's face makes her feel unsure, like she's miss stepped somewhere.
It's only when Michael launches at her and holds her in a crushing hug, that his mind is so loud it's screaming at her by being in contact, that she understands.
Michael's always been so strong and never truly had anyone who he felt he could rely on, to truly rely on. Alex probably now with everything known but not really anyone else and that hurts Isobel all over again.
They should've been united from the start. They should've been together, able to rely and trust each other without doubt.
She holds on tight to him and lets out a sigh when Michael’s mind quiets, Alex’s presence closer being the obvious reason why.
Isobel is going to have a talk with Max about Alex and about Michael. Alex is right that they need to all work together to figure this mess out.
#malex#my work#moon writes#BTH#Look I can still write!#malex fic#Alex Manes#Michael Guerin#Isobel Evans
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