#i love greek mythology but damn the gods were asshats

[elderwisp]

Long ago lived a priestess named Medusa whose beauty put others to shame. She gained the attention of Poseidon and like many Gods, he demanded her favor. Out of fear, she fled to her Goddess's temple to seek protection. With no avail, the Goddess Athena took offense to the defilement of her temple and punished Medusa. Cursed to live in a secluded island for eternity, one look from her would turn anyone to stone leaving her to a life of total isolation.

Thus is the cruelty of the Gods.

(source)

[awkwardpariah]

Wonder Woman - Please Help

Ok, I don’t get it anymore. According to Rotten Tomatoes, 2017s Wonder Woman is holding around 90% from audiences and critics. Everyone on tumblr, reddit, and facebook apparently loves this movie, and I... I just don’t get it. I thought it was ok, like a C average. On par with the first Thor movie. But everyone else seems to think its this unassailable masterpiece, and I just don’t get it. I want to know what’s wrong with me to think that this movie kinda sucks at times. So I’m going to make my argument of what bothers me about it, and you fine denizens of the interwebs tell me why I’m wrong. Pacing - Easily the most noticeable flaw in the movie. The pacing of this movie is all over the damn place, and it often feels like the story stops cold just so we can get some glory shots of Diana kicking ass. Don’t get me wrong, those are the best scenes in the movie, but the tone shift is so jarring that I could hardly remember the point of what the characters were doing before hand. Action scenes are supposed to build on the story, either as a natural transition from two points of dialogue, or are self contained stories in their own right. If you want a great example of the latter just re-watch the fight scenes from Fury Road or John Wick; for the former, watch the fight scenes from the Avengers. 

Supporting Characters - The not-Howling Commandos that Steve Trevor recruits are completely useless to the plot and are given no opportunities to leave a substantive impression on the story. Yeah Charlie (the Scottish guy you forgot had a name) got a couple good scenes in revealing a soldier tortured by the horrors of war but it was a plot thread that went nowhere. Samir and the Chief got some humanizing scenes about the discrimination they faced, but they were just dead weight on the plot. And none of those secondary characters, for all the importance that is forced on them, are really all that necessary to the story’s resolution. I don’t like comparing franchises, but compare Wondy’s squad with the Howling Commandos. We get one shot where the racial inequities in the armed services from that era are addressed (”I’m from Fresno, Ace.”), but everything we see from those characters is just them helping Cap. They are supporting characters, but the story knows that we mainly want to see what’s going on with Steve and Peggy. Wondy’s backup squad constantly feel like distractions who’s personalities and backstories ultimately mean nothing to the story’s resolution.

Acting - Ok, now here’s where I’m a real asshat... I didn’t think anyone in this movie brought their A game, save for maybe Chris Pine, but then again he’s always so damn bland that I couldn't tell you the difference between him on a good day or a bad day. Gal Gadot’s Wonder Woman was just more brooding DC blandness, David Thewlis felt completely out of place (that might have been the point, but it didn’t work for me), and people just need to stop hiring Danny Huston. Robin Write did her best with what she was given, and frankly that wasn’t enough. Personally I would have liked to have seen more between her and Hippolyta so we get a better sense of their relationship and motivations. Loyalty to the Source Material - I accepted going in that I was not going to get the Wonder Woman I wanted, and that was basically Renae De Liz’s update to William Marston/Elizabeth Marston/Olive Byrne’s original version of the chracter. I pretty much wanted to see the Legend of Wonder Woman brought to the big screen, DCs version of Captain America: The First Avenger. I knew I wasn’t going to get that... and somehow they made things worse, and completely betrayed the character... so you mean to tell me, Wonder Woman and the Amazons, the symbols of the feminist ideal given form, were all the result of a pissing contest between two old men? Who the fuck signed off on that shit? The Amazons were created by Zeus (not Hera, or Aphrodite, or Athena) just to fight Ares? They were created to be servants at the beck and call to a god who (if you know anything about Greek mythology beyond what you’ve seen from Disney) is canonical one of the most patriarchal ass-hats in theology? And now Wonder Woman (SPOILERS) is the child of Zeus, purely created according to suit his will? I know its kinda weird that she’s basically a golem, but at least that origin made her existence the product of a woman who had agency over her decisions. Ugh. Ok, maybe I’ve lost my damn mind, but this movie just pisses me off to no end sometimes, mostly because everyone is so in love with it.