#i love aqours so much my brain is so big i seriously want to say all of it so much im like biting it back

[packedice]

im so glad the niconamas constantly playing this stopped ruining it for me eventually. seriously such a good fucking song we are heroes <3333

[sunflowerhanamaru]

Once you wake up, it'll be a new morning (4/7: pictures)

She should have understand, of course, when Chika had squeezed her so hard before boarding the plane to visit her parents. Riko had laughed, had said something like ‘we’re seeing each other in a week, you big baby.’ and Chika had choked off a laugh, had said ‘I can’t wait to go back to you.’ and had boarded the plane.

Riko had been barely out of the airport, walking to her car when her phone had rung with a call from Ruby.

“Riko! Is Chika with you?”

“No.” had said Riko. “She’s on her plane now. Is there a problem?”

“Don't…” Riko had only noticed how distressed Ruby sounded. “Don’t go home. Don’t check the Internet. Come straight to Maru’s and I flat, okay?”

“Okay.” She had said.

She hadn’t listened. She had sat behind the steering wheel and had opened twitter to find hundreds of notifications, all about Chika leaving Aqours. She had started the car, brain blank and had drove straight to her flat, the one Chika and her had spent weeks hunting for, to find an envelope on the table. She had opened it, her head swimming with thoughts.

The message is short, concise. Chika couldn’t keep going like that, she had to quit them. To quit her.

Riko’s phone is ringing urgently on the floor. Riko doesn’t pick it up. She doesn’t think she will ever be able to.

Riko had always loved fall. From an artistic point of view, because fall is the perfect season for vibrant palettes and warm colors, but also for the large sweater season, for the morning’s biting cold. Fall had been pretty in Germany but everything seems prettier in Japan since Riko came back; she’s glad she agreed to a walk in a park with Hanamaru and Ruby to admire it.

After so many anonymous years she isn’t used anymore to being recognised in the street, though, and she soon begs her friends to retreat in a teahouse.

“I don’t know how you manage with all those people watching you.”

Hanamaru shrugs, her hands draped around her mug. “It’s not so bad anymore in Numazu, we can’t really complain.”

“You do though.” Says Ruby, eyes glittering. “Hanamaru complains so much lately, she’s becoming a real old library lady. Sometimes she tells the cats to quiet down at home after a day of work.” She laughs, and Hanamaru rolls her eyes with a smile. “But seriously we’re never bothered by fans anymore.”

“Except the occasional weirdo who thinks he can flirt with Ruby.”

“Or the occasional book nerd who thinks he can flirt with Hanamaru.” Ruby is the one who rolls her eyes this time and Riko can’t help but notice how many of each other’s habits they have adopted. She wonders if Chika and her would be like that too if they never stopped dating. She forces herself not to think about it.

“The Internet is wild though.” Comments Hanamaru. “people are all over the place everytime we post something. Some people truly still don’t get that we’re dating. Like. They think we are… What’s the term again?”

“Maru’s still not good with social medias.” Jokes Ruby, earning an outraged ‘Hey!’ from her girlfriend. “‘best friends goal’ is the term. We live together, we hold hands, there’s literally sneaky pictures of us kissing floating around and some people think we aren’t dating.” She shrugs. “That’s twitter for you.”

Riko is still thinking about their conversation late at night and she stupidly decides to quickly search for her name on twitter.

The first tweet she comes across to is a text post tagged ‘chikariko’ She (stupidly, stupidly) clicks on it and finds a complete thread of pictures. On the first one, sixteen years old Riko is looking at Chika like she hung the stars up the sky. Riko’s heart aches.

Riko relives the four years of their Aqours’ life through pictures, from fansigns to live shows to candids. She sees herself growing up, and Chika growing up as well. The last picture of the thread is from a week ago: someone had saw them in the shop they had met in their day at the shrine. The Chika and Riko from the first picture changed so much, she thinks a little sadly, but the way she looks at Chika didn’t change though. Twenty-six years old Riko looks at Chika the same way she always did and she fears maybe she always will.

Riko clicks on the tweet’s poster username and waits for her account to load. She scrolls through personal discussions and random pics and stops when she reads Chika’s name. ‘Aqours’ Chika and You spotted hanging out.’ reads the tweet. The picture attached is a candid of her friends walking down the streets of Harajuku. Riko notices that You is wearing her new merch t-shirt. She opens the new thread.

‘Omg is that new merch? I need Dia’s shirt!’ Says the first reply.

‘Rings too?’ The second tweet contains zoomed in pictures of Chika and You’s hands.

‘You’s ring has a blue gem but Chika’s is pink??? My chikariko heart’ Riko scrolls back to the pictures and zooms until the gem, undeniably pink, takes almost all the screen. She hits the contact button and find Chika’s number, hopes she hasn’t changed in six years.

“Riko?” The phone didn’t even rang twice, notices Riko.

“Did they asked you to wear that?”

“To wear… Do you mean the ring?”

“Yes, Chika, I mean the ring, obviously.” It’s unfair to be so mad at Chika and Riko knows it but. It feels like Chika is mocking her, mimicking her old lovesick habits to sell some more show’s tickets.

“They didn’t.” Chika sounds rushed, and anxious, and sad maybe. “Riko, I swear they didn’t.”

“Why did you wore it then?” Asks Riko, and she hates how wavering his voice sounds.

“Because I miss you.”

“You said that already.”

“No, Riko. I miss you, you know? I miss you. I’ve been missing you for so long.” Riko closes her eyes. “I want to become friends again.” Chika is breathing a little harder in the phone. “I’m in front of your door. Could you open to me? I want to talk.” Riko looks at the door like she’s afraid it’s going to open spontaneously because Chika is on the other side. She remembers the time management booked nine rooms for nothing, the time where her door always opened for Chika. She shakes her head

“Not tonight. Tomorrow, okay?”

“Yeah, of course, sorry.” Chika’s laugh sounds self-deprecating and Riko hates it. “I’m gonna sit there for a while thought, if that’s okay.”

“Okay.” Riko stands to go sit against the door too despite herself. “I’ve missed you too.” She says, so quietly she’s not sure Chika heard it.

“We’re going to make it work, right?” Chika lets out a tiny sobs that makes Riko’s heart clench. “We weren’t only girlfriends. We were best friends, too. Tell me we can fix it.”

“We can fix it. I promise.” Says Riko. She wishes she was half as confident as she’s making it seem.