#i like to think that this is how essek introduces her every time. and she spits on the ground every time

[astrid-beck]

that's MASTER astrid becke to you cunt

[flagsontheland]

For the seven characters ask: Fjord, Jester, Caleb, Veth, Essek, Caduceus, and Mollymauk?

taleweaver how does it feel to be my most favorite person on the planet today

Go grocery shopping with: Caduceus

- He'd introduce me to new foods I've never had before and also share new recipes with me and show me how to make them when we get home, but not before we've had a conversation that fundamentally reshapes my perception of reality in the produce aisle at Trader Joe's.

Have lunch with: Veth

- I can imagine having a fun brunch somewhere nice and spilling so much tea about people and talking crap. Also I feel like this is one of the activities where I wouldn't have to worry as much about her stealing anything lol.

Have coffee with: Caleb

- Caleb feels like he'd be one of those friends I catch up with once every month over coffee. We start talking about what we've been up to and then by the end we're talking deep stuff. And I get to hold Frumpkin in my lap the whole time.

Go thrift shopping with: Mollymauk

This was the one and only no-brainer for me. I just know Molly knows all the best thrift spots and he finds the best stuff and would get me to try on things that I wouldn't look at twice but then fit me amazing.

Explore a museum/art gallery/aquarium with: Jester

- I love going to those kinds of places but only with fun people and Jester would absolutely be perfect. We'd have so much fun and encourage each other to buy so much overpriced garbage at the gift shop. And she's definitely going to manage to deface at least one surface with her art.

Go the library/bookstore with: Essek

- I know Caleb probably should have been the go-to for this one but I think if he walked into any place with books I'd lose him. I think Essek would be so much better for searching and exploring together.

Have as a plus-one at a wedding: Fjord

- It depends on the context of the wedding but he's the one person I trust to conduct himself respectfully but also be somewhat fun lol.

Thanks so much this was so fun to think about!!

[jonthethinker]

Okay, Okay. Here is my personal pet theory about what the Luxon is.

What if the Luxon is the metaphysical equivalent of a Virtual Intelligence?

Everything we’ve learned about the beacons, from Caleb’s personal dives into understanding them to Essek’s illuminating yet heretical musings on them to whatever else Matt has thrown at us, has clearly shown us that a core feature of the beacons, the strongest narrative flavor, revolves around possibility.

These beacons supposedly freed the dark elves of Xorhaus, and later other “evil” beings from the chains of Lolth and the many other Betrayer Gods. But from what I’ve come to understand about the beacons, I have a very hard time thinking this was by the Luxon showing them the “right” path, but more so that it showed them many paths, all different to the one they already walked. I don’t think it gave them guidance, I think it gave them options.

And there’s this sensation I’ve gotten every time the beacons are used or discussed, especially when considering the many boons from gods and demigod’s we’ve seen, that this thing, if divine, provides so little compulsion to its user. It has no will, no desire. I can’t imagine the Sword of Fathoms not coming into the hands of someone without Uk’otoa thinking its every use will bring him closer to freedom. I think to the tomb that held the Deathwalker’s Ward, set to kill instantly any who sought to steal it from its resting place, and how I find it hard to imagine any unlocking its full power without either doing something specifically in service to the Raven Queen, or something she has deemed in her interest.

But these beacons, this Luxon, seems to be without a will of its own, without an intent, as we have seen with every other instance of a divine being. It can do as the divine have led us to believe they can, warping the very fabric of reality at its most fundamental levels, but it does not do so as a boast of its power or as a grand chess move in its Machiavellian schemes, it would seem. It doesn’t control or encourage. It simply introduces new possibilities. It’s not a lecture but a library, not a signpost but a map. And that’s not really what I’ve come to expect from a god.

So what if it isn’t a god? What if it’s another sort of remnant of the act of creation. A piece of the blue print. The command prompt of the universe. To bring more of the beacons together is the same as upgrading your PC with more RAM or a better graphics card; it increases its processing power, and so more of the universe is unlocked for you manipulate.

Even its role in extending the lives of the Krynn through consecution feels like a task being handled by a virtual intelligence, like an Alexa making a purchase for you or updating your schedule with a new reminder; it takes in souls as they depart their bodies, and then introduces them into a new body. It only does this when a soul has been consecuted, which can be assumed under my theory to be the equivalent of setting up your account on a new computer or website. If you’re registered, this service is available to you. It even feels like a computer’s solution to the problem of death; “Oh your hardware is failing? Let’s just upload a backup of your software on a new device.”

I don’t know if this is a particularly illuminating idea for anybody else, but it certainly feels like a handy metaphor for really wrapping my own head around the Luxon. Now to sit and wait for Matt Mercer to prove me horribly wrong.

[flurry-of-beaus-pop-pop]

Critical Role 2x71 Thoughts:

Life without Yasha is sad :( T-minus 15 episodes until she returns for good

Jester suggesting Beau and Dairon have a conversation in the hottub lmao

You can at least say thank you Dairon

Dairon needs to learn some manners 

Dairon really rubs me the wrong way. Like, don’t get mad at someone for not just giving you something that they’ve earned

I’m really liking that Dairon literally has zero standing in this conversation. Beau be on top. 

Beau clearly does not want Dairon to get involved in this, but feels like she has to make that decision, and that makes me mad. Stand up for yourself Beau 😤

When they’re closest ally (Essek) is the betrayer and they don’t even know

Beau doesn’t like the idea of Dairon being asleep is Yasha’s bed. 

Also, how are they going to explain Yasha’s absence

Beau is being so weird about Dairon lmao

Laura needing to refocus the camera while Travis just rolls his eyes in the background lol

Jester does a perception check and rolls a Nat 20, noticing that Dairon is sitting on top of the stares, Caduceus somehow also now knows this.. Taliesen does not do a great job at separating what Caduceus knows and what he knows. The same thing happened with Mollymauk. Noticeable incidents: Mollymauk somehow knowing that Nott was looking for Fjord’s letter when he would have had no way of knowing that, Caduceus suddenly knowing about Dairon as described above, and Caduceus knowing Beau and Yasha’s date without anyway of knowing

Dairon was doing so well and then they go and allude to the rest of the Mighty Nein using Beau 🙄 

The Mighty Nein introducing Dairon to the person that she’s literally looking for (Essek) and they don’t even know

The Mighty Nein putting in their shopping list with Essek lol

Awww Sprinkle loves Jester

Being a wizard is expensive, I am never going to play one lol

Their first teleportation and they don’t warn Yussa.. and they don’t have the fancy magic dodecahedron with them anymore. This is going to be interesting

Marion and Jester reuniting every time is so adorable

Literally half way through the episode and just now realized Marisha is sitting on the wrong side of the table since Travis and Laura are video-chatting in

I’m loving that Yeza was originally the one that suggests Nott show Luc the crossbow and Nott is completely against it, the tables have turned

Jester trying to make it clear that Nugget is not Luc’s dog, just a loaner. 

Beau talking about how they all take care of each other in a cycle and Marion describes it as friendship and Beau is like “oh I was going to call it unhealthy” lol

Beau wearing one of Jester’s dressed 😂

Luc loves water. Nott does not lol

Everyone wanting Fjord to have some kind of reaction to the water and  Travis is just like “nah”

Awww Jester telling her Mom about Yasha. Jester really loves Yasha 😭

Caleb handing Yasha’s gift to Beau because he knows

Beau referring to Yasha as one of her “dead friends” 😭 Beau thinks Yasha is dead and that breaks my heart

Yeza threatening Luc with Nott’s crossbow if he doesn’t eat his dinner lol

Nott/Veth really been planning to ditch the Nein since Day 1, it’ll be interesting to see if it actually happens after they finish business in Eiselcross. 

Uk’otoa is coming for you Fjord 👀 Very, very slowly

Oop, Essek makes an oopsie and everyone gets hurt. Was it actually an accident 👀 who knows, dun dun dun

[autistic-beshelar]

'm loving everyone venting about Molly! Thanks! And I want to ask you how you imagined the finale was gonna be? I have this whole fanfic in my head about Molly realising he had a four leaf clover stuck in his hair and upon noticing it he would give it to Yasha. Then the M9 would deal with Trent and Molly would finally know how terrible of a person the dude was. And then the M9 would introduce Molly to everyone else they met and visit every place they left better than they found it.

that's so sweet!

it's weird, because while like every other molly fan, i've had thoughts on his resurrection and a fic series i'm working on, but i'd never really... thought about the end of the campaign, or what it might be like?

(ETA this ended up so long im so sorry i have a lot to say apparently and this isn't even all of it)

my biggest and most important thing: they are a family. they belong together. maybe they'll go off on their own for a while, or stay with their families, but the nein belong together.

for fjord... he spent so long trying to be someone else, and while he's learning how to be his own person now, he deserves closure on that part of himself. he deserves a last conversation with vandren, and then to move on, to explore new places, to find new goals for himself. there is so much for him now, the open sea with so much life and promise. he buys a ship, a new ship, all his own, not one borrowed or stolen from another, and jester paints its name, decorates its quarters, makes it a home. he wrangles the nein (yes, even veth, yes, even essek) into joining him, and they set sail, all nine of them, the way it couldn't be the first time. he shows molly the ropes, teaches essek how to navigate, and watches his crew, his friends, his family, learning from him, placing so much trust in him, letting him guide them, and sees how truly happy they are to be here with him. usually, the crew is him, jester, beau, and often molly and yasha, but sometimes he will leave for a time, entrusting the boat to orly. sailing isn't all he has now, there is more to see, to do, there are things for him on land now too, but the sea will always be home to him.

for jester... she deserves her happy fairytale ending. i think for a while she stays with her family, seeing her parents happily together, finally properly introducing her boyfriend, and just spending time with her mum in a way that she didn't get to so much when she was young. and then i think she travels, just for the sake of exploring, with no defined goal other than to sow the seeds of joy and chaos everywhere she walks. and as she travels, she begins to write. stories were homes to her as a child, and they're homes even now, for someone with such a powerful imagination. she writes of her adventures, of her friends, she writes of mystical and fantastical things, half of them real. she writes and writes, words and illustrations filling so many books, she gives them to beau, to yasha, passes them off as silly little things, as though they aren't brilliant works of art. all of the nein read her stories - yasha out loud to molly as she plays with his hair, caduceus and calliope in the quiet of their garden, caleb and essek by the light of their bedside table. and in time the stories reach others, scattered journals are copied and bound into books, and one day jester wanders a quiet, nameless town, and in the window of a bookshop she's never seen, embossed on the cover of a novel, there is a brilliant green door.

for caleb... oh man, he is a teacher. that is so perfect for him, and i've been thinking about it ever since his talk with luc. i think there's something so powerful about being the person he deserved when he was younger, about stepping into that position of power and authority and being so kind with it. he's so passionate about magic, and i think it's beautiful to see him come so far - from someone burned and traumatised and so convinced he was irredeemable, to someone who can take comfort in soft things, someone who some days, almost, almost believes he can be good. i think out of everyone, except perhaps veth, he stays home the most. he still adventures with the nein of course, and if there is ever a whisper of artefacts or hidden knowledge or some expedition or other, the nein are with him in an instant to investigate it. but more often than not he is home, making the empire a better place, keeping the fire warm for them.

for veth... i want her to learn that she is enough as she is. i want her to learn that she doesn't have to choose between wife, adventurer, mother. she is all of these things. i want her to accept that her transformation was not a return to her old self but becoming someone new. i think she goes home, as she promised, and i do think she stays there for a long while, a few years perhaps, making up for lost time. and she'll pretend that she's fine with that life, with staying home, with being a wife and a mother. but that isn't all she is, and eventually, with yeza's help, with the nein's help, she will accept that. she'll no longer see it as two lives, two identities. she'll be able to kill fearsome beasts and explore strange new lands with her friends without guilt or fear, and at the end of the day she'll go home and regale her husband and son with extraordinary tales of her and her friends' heroics (that may or may not be exaggerated).

for yasha... i want her to be happy and loved. she's come SO far, from someone running from her past, drowning in guilt and so unsure of herself, to someone strong and bold. i love that ashley said she would do little odd jobs - i think she would do that, go around helping people as they explore. like most of the others, i don't think she would truly settle down. i like to imagine she does have a house somewhere - maybe inspired by the clays, she has a home somewhere green, surrounded by flowers, somewhere quiet and calm and peaceful. a little cottage maybe, for her and beau, just somewhere to return to and feel safe, somewhere she can rest. but i think most of her time would be spent travelling, seeing all the wonderful beautiful things the world has to offer, being with her friends who love her for exactly who she is, who showed her that she was someone worthy of being loved, who taught her that it's possible for her to love herself.

for caduceus... i think, for a time, he rests. he's tired. not done, far from done, but tired. i think he stays with his family at the grove, tending to all the things that are now so vibrant and alive, feeling the walls he was so sure would crumble. but after a time, he would feel that he is supposed to leave. the grove is wonderful, and will always be his home, somewhere he will always return to, and i think throughout his life - throughout the nein's life, and of course they will come to rest there, after everything - he will come home, to tend to the garden, to watch over the temple while his siblings roam. i think he travels, too, but not so much to adventure. after everything he's been through i think he deserves some peace, and quiet. he travels all the lonely winding roads, all the quiet humming spaces, sees all the life in all the hidden corners. while several members of the nein travel with him, it's yasha that walks with him the most, happy to go at his pace, eager to share in that peace and wonder.

for molly... there is so much for him now. he is no longer covered in eyes, no longer has that weight on him, even if he does hold memories of it, in darker moments. he is him but brand new, able to forge himself into whoever he wants to be, and the nein give him so much space and so much time for that. i think he stays with the clays for a little while - while the others deal with trent, yasha, so so scared to lose him again, places all her trust in caduceus to take care of him. and when they return (to find him with freshly cut hair the same colours as his coat, and a particularly proud looking clarabelle), they just spend time with him, all the time they missed and more. fjord tells him of their journey, jester showing him her journal, giving him meaning for it all, and all the time yasha holds his hand, unwilling to ever let him go. it's hard, being gone for so long, and while he is so, so (embarrassingly) proud of his friends for all that they've gone through, and how much they've grown, it's also glaringly obvious that he can't keep up. he almost has it in mind to leave - he doesn't want to hold them back, and he can't help but wonder if he's really the molly they want - it's hard to live up to a memory, after all. and there is so much he's missed. they tell him he's a moron, obviously. he is their friend, and there is nothing they won't do for friends, and waiting, staying, is such a small thing to ask. beau trains him, at his insistence - she thinks it's a joke at first, tells him that she'd be a terrible teacher, just as she was a terrible student. she's wrong, of course, and molly grows stronger by the day. he has so many adventures with them, sailing the seas on fjord's ship, sowing chaos with jester, fighting side by side with beau. there is not a single day that he isn't with his friends, yasha most of all. they are with him through everything, though good days, so many good days, and through bad ones too. molly has so much time - time the nein have given him, as he once gave to them - to live, to love, to wander, to form new memories and experiences. to be everything he never had the chance to the first time, and so much more.

for beau... she is so, so scared at first. they saved the world. they stopped trent. they've done... everything they've set out to do. what's left? what's keeping them together? when molly tries to run it reminds her so much of how she felt before, how she thought to run, to leave them before they could leave her. he returns the favour, reminds her that they are family, reminds her that she has worth, and the nein want her to stay, that they keep her, just as they kept him. (she almost believes him, and definitely doesn't cry). she does so many things - she goes home with yasha once in a while, somewhere tranquil, somewhere to study and research, she travels with caduceus, learning to appreciate a slower pace and all the quiet contemplation and companionship it can offer, she travels with fjord, his first mate, his best mate, allowing someone she trusts to take the helm and lead her on adventures. and she studies - long gone are the days of pretending to turn her nose up at books - she is one of professor widogast's best (and most irritating) students, learning magic not to weave it herself but just to understand it, just learning for the sake of learning. when she confronts her father, fjord and caleb are there as they should be - fjord to talk, to use his words and his charm to help, caleb in quiet solidarity, a hand on her shoulder, just standing with her as she tears down her mentor, her abuser, and comes out stronger for it, just as she had been there for him. finally, she can put that behind her, and she stays with the soul, as their greatest expositor (though maybe one who never does their paperwork), rooting out corruption, seeking the truth, exploring new horizons.

for essek... he spends a long time waiting for the past to catch up to him. it doesn't. it already has, in a way, if only in his own mind, the once unfamiliar guilt that weighs heavily on his shoulders. it never goes away, not entirely, but time heals, and so does the presence of the rest of the nein, always in his life, for as long as they can be. though he and caleb have different goals, they overlap so neatly, and though essek has a place in his own homeland, he spends far, far more time living with caleb. he continues with his research, caleb and beau poring over his notes, sharing his excitement and passion. he doesn't go on adventures near as much as the others, preferring to stay home, but he visits them, in all their different homes scattered across the land - jester in nicodranas, the clays at the blooming grove, veth and her family on the outskirts of zadash, beau and yasha's cottage in a little forest near felderwin. he has homes scattered across the land, so many places he is always welcome, and while guilt never entirely leaves, nor does the knowledge that one day, of course, all this will end, he finds peace.

i guess the reason i've never thought about the campaign ending is because for me.. it doesn't, not really. the mighty nein are family, chosen family. they stay together, they find homes in each other, and they leave every place better than they found it.

[bluemoontarot]

"Wait...so are rainbows real? Or was my Umavi fucking with me?"

Caleb stared at Essek for a long moment, trying to uncover whether or not the Shadowhand was joking or not. But when the Drow simply blinked at him, awaiting an answer, the wizard's face fell to shock.

"You have traveled outside the darkness of Rosohna many times...and you have never seen a rainbow?" He asked curiously. It was now Essek's turn to ponder whether or not Widogast was messing with him or not. Caleb, though intelligent and wonderful, had quite the mischievous streak when presented with an opportunity.

"I...no."

"You have seen...eclipses, shooting stars, meteor showers, the moons disappearing in their new moon phase, and many wonders of space...you have not witnessed a rainbow?" Caleb asked again.

"I have not...what is so important about this?"

Jester's gasp was dramatic enough to leave the rest of the Nein leaning back from her. She all but crawled over, taking Essek's hands in her own, slightly sticky from a pastry he noted.

"Rainbows are so pretty!! Essek I can't believe you haven't seen one oh my god!!! Caleb! Caleb make a magical one for him to see!" She squealed, eyes alight. She delighted in showing him new things, and Essek hadn't the heart to tell her that he had already seen the ocean, and a waterfall, and a sunrise. But it made her so happy to think she had introduced him to these beautiful parts of nature.

"Nein...I think Essek should witness it for real first." Caleb hummed.

"Oooh, you want him to like...see it raw before you make it all magical and cool." Jester nodded.

"I...r-raw?" Essek blinked.

Jester simply rolled back to the other's, literally rolling across the ground until she bumped into Beau and giggled. Turning to Caleb, Essek blew out a huff of a chuckle.

"So...rainbows?" He asked.

"Refractions of light after it rains...the sun had to hit the water droplets just right...but it creates an arc in the sky with every color of the light spectrum. It's an optical illusion of sorts too, no matter how hard you try...you will never reach the end of the rainbow or find where it "begins"." Caleb informed him easily. Essek nodded, a little interested now in the science behind it. Natural wonders were fascinating, and made people use their imaginations to explain them.

"Well...I hope we see one." Essek hummed, offering Caleb half of his bread roll.

---

To wish for a rainbow was to wish for rain, Essek learned, as after two more days of traveling on foot, it began to pour.

Relentlessly.

"Ach..I wish I could just teleport us there." Caleb groaned, holding his coat above his head. But alas, none of them had ever been to this small town before that held sacred texts and research regarding the first uses of residuum and pre calamity references to the substance. Essek didn't have to be here. But this evidence was to help in the trial against Trent. His argument currently was that there was no proof regarding a religious connection to residuum, nor was there an ethics guide to follow regarding it; therefore his experiments were not illegal.

Beauregard took that as a challenge and had found their destination within the week. Essek of course was involved because it involved Caleb. And he wanted to see Trent shrivel in a cell. If he had his way...

"You're clenching."

"I-I'm /what/?" Essek snapped his head to Beau.

"Your fists. What's up your ass dude?"

He sighed, "Ikithon. I just want him gone." He admitted.

"Same dude. Calm down, we'll be at the town tomorrow."

---

The town was small but lively, a group of half elves and humans in tune with nature it seemed. It was like Diet Clay's, not quite the Blooming Grove, but the same sort of atmosphere.

As Caleb and Beau did their research, Essek assisted Caduceus in procuring teas, herbs, and seeds for his home in the gorgeous marketplace they had. It was still raining, and Essek had taken to carrying the pink parasol Jester had painted for him. It saved him from being wet, but not from the wind.

By the time they settled in the tower that night, the poor Drow was slightly shivering, even if he was trying to hide it. A warmth draped over his shoulders and he turned to find that Caleb had wrapped him in his coat.

"O-Oh...um...thank you."

"Of course. You were shivering."

Caleb sat beside him in the salon, putting an arm around them. When alone, their affections were not so restrained, they had yet to put a label on what exactly their relationship was...but with each passing day; Essek was beginning to see where he wanted this to go.

Leaning against him, he allowed his head to rest on his shoulder, soaking in Caleb's warmth. "You found everything you need?" He asked.

"We found enough...it will take Beau and I a few days to translate everything...and we will need to take it to the courts so they can be translated by a neutral third party as well...and we'll need to then return the evidence here...but...it will be well worth it."

Essek nodded. "Good..."

They sat there in quiet, reading their respective tomes, curled up together, exchanging quiet kisses and sweet words that left Essek flushed and shy.

"I'd wish for it to rain every day if it meant I could keep your body and heart warm for the rest of time." Caleb murmured into his hair, Essek curled against his chest.

"Rest of time...I'd give up anything to have you with me for that." He whispered, arms going around his middle.

---

When they leave the tower, the rain had finally stopped. Essek and Caleb had decided to go and try the family ownes Cafe that was in the main square of town. As they stepped out, Essek relished in the fact that there was no wet wind slapping him in the face. A wonderful feeling.

They made their way up the hill towards the main square, the top of the hill allowing one to see over the trees surrounding the small town. Essek quite liked the view, so once at the top, he turned to take it in.

"...Caleb?"

"Hm?"

Essek tugged on his arm worriedly.

"What is that?"

"What is what?"

Caleb turned to see what had worried Essek so, only to see a vibrant rainbow in the distance, arching above them grandly.

"Oh...wow..." Caleb breathed, grinning. Essek took in his love's casual attention to mean that the colors in the sky were not a threat. "They remind me of a more organized aurora borealis." Essek said.

"Isn't it beautiful?" Caleb asked softly.

"Very much so...very bright against the morning sky...gorgeous even..." Essek whispered. A warm hand slipped into his own, fingers lacing together like two pieces of a puzzle.

"That is rainbow, schatzi..." Caleb murmured softly, taking in the slightly wide eyed look of Essek as he gazed across the valley at the natural magic of it. He squeezed his hand and leaned in, "Legend says there is gold at the end of a rainbow." He smirked.

"But...you said this is an illusion. We would be chasing a pipe dream." Essek reasoned.

"But on the off chance we find it...is that not worth it?" Caleb hummed.

"You are a dreamer, Caleb..." He sighed, smiling none the less.

"There is one dream I have...that the gods blessed me with making true." Caleb mentioned. Essek tilted his head, curious. He wondered if this dream had to do with magic, perhaps it was bringing Mollymauk back (who was still off sailing and "finding himself" as they put it), but his thoughts came to a halt when slightly chapped lips pressed against his own.

"Do not think so hard." He whispered.

"My dream was having you...and now I do."

Essek blushed darkly.

"Did you kiss me under a rainbow, Widogast?"

"Ja, and I'll do it again~"

Essek found himself laughing easily.

"Please do."

“Wait, so are rainbows real or was my teacher just fucking with me?”

- A Drow who has never been above ground.