#i like this idea of this but not sure about the execution

[tsunodaradio]

to be honest ⛐ 𝐀𝐀𝟐𝟑

“i’m sorry i had a machine hooked up to me and i couldn’t lie.” 

ꔮ starring: alex albon x girlfriend!reader. ꔮ word count: 1.4k. ꔮ includes: romance, fluff fluff fluff. inspired by and references the Does Alex Albon think he is No. 1 at Williams? | The Lie Detector video, secret (not for long, sucker) relationship. ꔮ commentary box: this idea has been clanging in my head for two weeks now, i fear 🐈‍⬛ 𝐦𝐲 𝐦𝐚𝐬𝐭𝐞𝐫���𝐢𝐬𝐭

Alex had asked—begged—you not to watch the lie detector test video. 

You agreed, but not without teasing him about divulging some embarrassing secret. You figured it was something along those lines. Maybe they made him choose his favorite cat or reveal his ridiculous pre-race routine. Either way, your boyfriend seemed pretty serious about not wanting you to see that particular piece of content. 

Except it’s been impossible to avoid. 

Your algorithms are unsurprisingly fine-tuned to anything and everything Alex. Clips of his radio messages on Instagram reels, edits of him to Hamilton songs on your TikTok For You page. You’re idly scrolling through your Twitter feed when one particular post catches your attention. 

It’s not even the concept of a reveal that catches your attention. No, that was to be expected. 

What did they mean—Alex asked for it not to be mentioned? 

It’s one thing to keep you from watching. It’s a completely different situation to ask everybody else to stay mum, as if purposefully keeping you out of the loop.

That would make no sense. You try to shake the thought out of your head, try to go back to doom-scrolling, but it nags in the back of your brain. Alex wasn’t the type to hide things from you. The two of you were a secret to the rest of the world, sure, but there were no secrets between you. 

Right? 

You set your phone on Do Not Disturb. You scrub the kitchen clean. You take a scalding hot shower. None of it helps. 

By the time you’re back on your couch, red-faced from the heat of your bath and something else entirely, you make an executive decision. It’s easier to ask for forgiveness than permission, you decide. Alex has given you grace for much worse. 

You pull the video up.

The guilt you’re feeling ebbs at the familiar lilt of Alex’s accent. My heart is gonna be, like, two hundred.

He’s not even on the screen yet, but you can imagine the way his boyish smile would curve around the words. He’s not due to visit until much later, so this six-minute video will have to tide you over the feeling of missing him. And your curiosity. That, more than anything. 

For a moment, you nearly forget why you’re watching. It’s so easy to be distracted by Alex’s sheer expressiveness, by the way he’s always just a bit breathless when he’s laughing. You want nothing more than to reach into your phone and will him to be seated right next to you, alleged reveal be damned. 

Have you ever sat on the toilet so long, your legs fell asleep?, he’s asked, and you simultaneously snort with on-screen Alex. 

Many a times, he answers, and it’s registered as the truth. But it’s more because that’s my time to watch TikTok.

You’re all-too aware of that habit. The petty arguments of you slamming on the bathroom door, demanding for your turn, only for Alex to shout back that he’s finishing part 32 of some movie cut up into several videos, and he’ll be out soon, he swears. It’s the type of domestic image that paints how comfortable the two of you have been this past year, even if there was nobody else to see it. 

Did you have a celebrity crush growing up? 

Yes, on-screen Alex responds. When prodded, he adds rather sheepishly, Erm… Emma Watson. 

You knew that, too. When you first found out, you made Alex sit through the fourth movie so you could tease him relentlessly. Fed up, he had tackled you down onto the mattress during the Triwizard Tournament’s Second Task. The ensuing makeout session had been both heated and playful. A part of you can still feel it thrumming beneath your ribs, months later. 

You’re scheming how to orchestrate another Harry Potter marathon just as two things happen at once. 

First, the Alex on-screen gets asked—baited, more like—with a query of And does your girlfriend compete? 

Then, your front door swings open. The man himself calls out like he always does, “Honey, I’m home!” 

It’s an inside joke, one you can’t really dwell on. Your attention is halved. 

You’ve started out of shock, and your phone is playing on full volume. Just enough for your boyfriend to hear his own sputter of My—my what? from what you’d been watching. 

There’s the sound of something crashing in the entryway. Later, you’ll discover it’s Alex having dropped his duffel bag in his own panic. 

He’s at the mouth of the living room in the next second, but you’re too busy going slack-jawed at the scene in the challenge. The polygraph shoots up. The examiner shakes his head amusedly. The man on the screen fucking laughs, goading Alex, So there it is! You’ve got a girl, Albono?

“You’re watching the video!” Alex shrieks accusingly. 

In return, you screech, “You told everyone about me?!”

Alex darts forward. You mentally curse his racer reflexes and his long legs as he throws himself on top of you. He’s blissfully unaware of his own weight, and so you feel winded amid your attempts to fight back. 

“I didn’t—tell about you,” he argues, his arms flailing as he tries to wrestle your phone out of your hands. “That’s all I said!” 

Which is a damn lie, of course. You don’t even see your screen anymore, but you can hear the video playing out. 

Alex being asked, Would you say this is your soulmate? 

Alex, without missing a beat: Yes. Without a doubt, yes. 

The Alex on top of you groans. He buries his face in the crook of your neck like he might be able to run and hide from his answer, especially as the examiner declares, He’s not lying. 

You relent, hitting pause and casting your phone aside. It lands somewhere by the foot of the couch. “I can’t believe you watched it,” your boyfriend petulantly murmurs against your skin. 

“I can’t believe I’m your soulmate,” you shoot back, and he pinches your side in retaliation. 

“Seriously,” he huffs, adjusting his positioning so that he’s not crushing you too much. “What happened to trust, huh?” 

“Slow down, Gabriella Montez.” 

“Stop being a nerd. It makes me want to kiss you.” 

You’re giggling as Alex rolls off you, flopping to the other end of the couch. He’s all lanky limbs and furrowed brows, his glare fixed on your phone like Sky Sports has personally wronged him. You reach out to rub his ankles, and he instinctively relaxes as if his body is fine-tuned to respond to your touch. 

“I’m sorry for watching the video,” you say. 

Alex frowns. “You’re not sorry.” 

You’re not. 

He heaves out a long-held sigh. “I had to do this whole thing,” he grumbles absent-mindedly. “Hid my Instagram story from you and all that…” 

“You what?” 

“Anyway. Anyway.” Alex clears his throat, his frown curling into a thin pressed line. It’s a rueful kind of grin, one that doesn’t quite reach his eyes. His tick for when he’s guilty. “I was going to tell you.” 

“I bet you were,” you hum. 

You’re not mad. Not really. You know he’s been itching to go public, has wanted you in the Williams hospitality suite for God-knows-how-long. That laminated ID card that would proudly proclaim Guest of Alex Albon.

“They still don’t know you,” he offers. This time, he’s reaching out for you. Preemptively trying to soothe some imagined annoyance. Alex tugs you gently until you’re resting between his legs, his face burying in the back of your hair. 

“All they know is that you exist,” he adds, “and they don’t have to know anything else.” 

You feel a pang in your chest, one put there when you’re reminded of just how lucky you are to have somebody so patient. Someone so willing to set aside his wants for your comfort, your peace of mind. 

“Okay,” you say, voice now softer that Alex has his chin hooked over your shoulder. “It’s alright.” 

“I’m sorry I had a machine hooked up to me and I couldn’t lie.” 

You laugh. “As long as you promise to never lie to me,” you note, nudging his ribs lightly. He lets out an exaggerated howl. 

“I would never,” he grumbles, and you know—you know that’s the truth, too. 

You tilt your head slightly, catching the complicated expression on Alex’s face. There’s that hint of insecurity, that touch of guilt, that flash of impatience. But all of it eases up when you lean in, and you kiss the doubt away. 

“I believe you,” you breathe against his lips, and he’s already smiling before he pulls you in for more. ⛐

BONUS —

[ohnoitstbskyen]

You are still doing it. You are still doing the thing. You are uncritically accepting the framing and understanding of Jesus developed by Christians in Christian texts for Christian audiences, and what i am trying to ask people to do is to just for one picosecond adopt a hostile reading of those texts, or literally any frame of understanding of them other than credulity!

"Wow, I'm reading this book about Dienetics and L. Ron Hubbard sure is a swell guy! He was a revolutionary against the galactic tyrant Xenu! Sure, his followers have done some bad things in his name, but Ron was a radical progressive!"

For just a moment, please understand Christian theology and Christian texts and Christian narratives as what they are: propaganda literature, written by and for members of a cult to reinforce and justify their own moral and political belief systems.

Literally not one single word of the Bible is written in Jesus' own hand, all of it is writing ABOUT the man, after his death, by other people with an agenda for how they wanted his martyrdom to be meaningful politically and spiritually. It is a text with hundreds of authors, all competing for authority.

If there was a historical Jesus, he did not heal the sick, did not turn water to wine, did not feed 5000 people or walk on water, and was not resurrected after being dead in a cave for three days. And because we know that all of those stories about him are, generously speaking, fucking fairy tales, we should also be able to accept that the rest of the stories about him are not credible historical reportage either, and understand that "Jesus" is a literary creation who bears at best passing resemblance to whatever real man may have inspired him.

Please be willing to read the Bible with the same frame of skepticism that you would use for any other piece of beatific cult literature. The Bible makes Jesus look like a swell guy because it is religious propaganda designed to glorify a martyr and rhetorically justify structuring power around his (purported) dogmas.

Once we adopt a skeptical or hostile reading of the Bible, and once we understand Jesus as a literary creation, maybe then we can treat him like one and have him play a villain in a TV show.

Maybe then he can be used to narratively embody a critique or satire or mockery of his pop cultural persona or his movement in history or the religious dogma that is ascribed to him, just the same as we do with so many other historical and religious and folkloric figures. And maybe we can do it without credulous cultural Christians jumping in to be like "um actually this is factually incorrect, Jesus was historically an uwu cinnamon roll smol bean, it says so in my favourite fanfic!"

The eschatology espoused by Christ in the Bible is and remains fucked up, by the way, I will not yield on this. Human life on Earth is not a gauntlet of noble suffering whose misery is justified and paid for by a reward in the afterlife. Being oppressed and abused does not make you spiritually more pure it just fucks you up and usually makes you a worse person. And the meek shall not inherit the fucking Earth, the Earth will be strip mined and left a scorched wasteland by capital holders unless the meek stop sitting prayerfully in their holy misery and start [redacted] some fucking executives' houses.

"Render unto Caesar" how about render unto the oppressor a mouthful of their own broken teeth actually, Jesus, how about that? Maybe it kinda sucked how you made a virtue out of material inaction against oppression, maybe "turn the other cheek" is dogshit advice for making a better world on Earth. Maybe the idea that the suffering of the poor shall be repaid in the kingdom of heaven has turned out to be a really effective way of justifying keeping the poor fucking miserable.

Rich men can't enter the kingdom of heaven? Oh wow, I guess I'll enjoy my epic moral victory over Jeff Bezos as the AI data centers cook the atmosphere and drink the lakes dry. Truly, the most noble thing an oppressed person can do is die about it!

I'm not even a fucking atheist, i don't think religion is inherently either good or bad and I don't think Christianity is evil or poisonous. I am just so desperately bored with the special little moral exception carve out that is constantly given especially to Jesus specifically, sheltering him from ever being portrayed as anything other than a really swell guy who is sooooooooo tragically misunderstood, and who can never be held responsible for any bad things done in his name, but always be credited with the good things. I am sick of people considering it somehow taboo to mock or be rude about a fucking cult leader.

"If they introduce either of them, I hope they are straight up villains. I am tired of Jesus Was A Nice Guy Actually interpretations of that particular prophet, it lets Christianity off the hook far too easy."

That is certainly a challenge because, just as Tv Tropes explains in their page for "Jesus Was Way Cool" (a.k.a: this trope), he is God in human form who routinely mingled with and was willing to forgive those who were considered outcasts even to the church primarily through the pen and not the sword

9 times out of 10, you will look like a asshole because you're demeaning what might essentially be the most universal "Greatest Of All Time" to ever exist

See this is the shit I'm talking about. It's this shit right here. I am so tired of this exact thing.

"Jesus was so nice" he was a cult leader who claimed to have the divine power to define and forgive human sin, and you live in a culture which is pathologically obsessed with worshipping him, even while the religion he founded has slaughtered and persecuted untold millions of people over the course of two thousand years in his name.

I'm not particularly atheistic as a person, but I feel vomit well up in my throat when people uncritically and without a hint of irony take it as Literal Gospel that Jesus Was Nice Actually, and that it would somehow be unfair to him to use him in fiction to embody literally any of the bad things that his religion has done.

I dunno man, maybe the apocalypse cult leader's eschatological teachings are partly to blame for how the followers of his religion obsess over sin and purity in the eyes of God? Maybe his claim to be an instrument of universal divine justice on Earth is partly to blame when his followers abuse and murder non-Christians as enemies of that divine justice?? Maybe some of the things Jesus said and did have a causative impact on how the followers of his teachings behave??

But no, I'm just talking crazy talk here. Everyone knows that the things Jesus said and did can never be to blame for any bad thing that Christians do, but they can always be credited for all the good things that Christians do.

Only the good things, because Jesus Was Nice. He was the universal Greatest Of All Time. It says so on tv tropes dot org

[idontknowreallywhy]

Me: *Working from home, barely restraining self chewing on desk from overwhelm and the consequences of overcommitting and all the deadlines and the tendency towards executive function failure exponentially worsened by burning out 9 months ago but being unable to take a proper break since to recover*

Colleague who I spoke to over a year ago about ND things and how cool it would be to have an informal support group for people who get it: “Hey! We should set up that support group we talked about! Have you got any time?”

Me: *chews on desk* “uh definitely up for this but maybe not for a couple of months”

Them: “shall we put something in for July?”

Me: *squeaks quietly* “ok!”

10 mins later

Friend: “hey, I’m really struggling with these many horrible situations in my life, could we meet up tomorrow to chat I’m gonna explode?”

Me: *already panicking at amount have to do this weekend* “I’m so sorry we are out and about all day doing the things.”

Friend: “even just an hour would be great”

Me: “ok I’ll try”

10 mins later

Other friend: “hi!! It’s such lovely weather, shall we get together and take the kids camping tomorrow night?”

Me: *who hasn’t had a decent night of sleep in a fortnight but really likes camping and supports this idea* “ummmm… I love idea but I just can’t this weekend”

Me, RSD sufferer: *Curled up in the bathroom trying to remind myself the rejection panic pain is just psychosomatic, I am a nice person, but I really need to get a grip because I have already missed so many deadlines on the thing I am supposed to be working on today and my very lovely boss is getting a bit stressed cos it’s causing her issues she is trying to protect me from*

Not even sure why I’m posting this other than to say some days this whole neurodiversity thing is just unmanageable. I am burning up and I have no idea what to do about it.

[keepmovingbuckley]

ok im back on my shit so hear me out for ONE SECOND. lower ur tomatoes for a bit, you can boo me at the end

the last alarm isnt horrible. its bad, yes but not atrociously horrible. if it were a longer than 40minutes episode, it wouldn't have been this bad. sure, killing off a main character is a shit kove in the first place but making his funeral episode about a b plot turned a plot is worse.

its missing a lot is scene, the off-screenification for this one is WILD. imagine instead of shit hot pile of garbage we got a longer episode. lets say we cant undo the actual problem (killing off bobby) but we could've gotten(and tbf i feel like writing fics about these myself):

athena's case about the dead kid to reflect HER grief (not ours btw, which was probably the main idea of it anyway but it came across at a jab at us). it wasnt bad by itself but very poorly executed.

chim's regrets and anger, actually see him on that run. how he got on that roof. show us that scene where he called for bobby's body to be released. i just know he DIDN'T keep it together.

buck's therapy sessions that turned him into this non-buck like figure that this episode portrayed. or even better he'd internalise it and NOT go to therapy at all and thats how he gets so robotic. he's shoving everything deep inside.

eddie's shock. we already didnt get a scene with him finding out, so at least, if he's THIS LATE to LA, WHY is he this late. no money? problems with his parents? chris? he's moving in slowmotion, hes devastated for not being there yet talks about scones.

ravi was ready to become a criminal for them. its his first funeral like this, he's trying to keep it together by asking eddie about the funerals he attented. extend that fuckass scene.

hen is so... weirdly uplifted. fine, but why? for someone who almost nearly died too, whose captain died she acts weird. could've given us a scene where she goes the "live for the one that saved u"

geralt wouldn't have been this bad if he had less screen time. he was also hurting, he tried to make them not feel better but understand he's not there to replace bobby. EVER. so by expanding everyone else's screentime, his wouldn't be so annoying.

the last alarm had bad writing because of all the scenes that are missing. its everything happening off screen that makes it shit. bc if you expand it, it would solve some problems.

i liked it bc i filled in scenes in my head when i watched it live but im pretty sure i cant rewatch it or my rating would go significantly lower.

you can get ur tomatoes now. also i did ramble a lot and might repeated myself but im not rereading this is emotional rant typing not prose

[odyssean-flower]

chapter 19 part 2 (rough)

im making good progress 👍

“Can Lady Furina really ban you from entering the city until sunset?”

“Technically, it isn’t a ban, but an executive order from the Hydro Archon for me to remain here and ‘enjoy a romantic countryside date with my wife. I cannot defy such an order, unfortunately.”

“I had no idea that she can order you around like that...”

“It is a power she rarely uses. She knows full well the importance of my role, after all.”

“Clearly, she is not above using it for frivolous matters.”

You and Neuvillette were walking down the small road that led to town. It was early in the morning, and only birdsong could be heard. The mountains looked blue and hazy in the distance.

Today, you would be serving as a tour guide for Neuvillette.

As to how things turned out this way, it was all thanks to an early morning letter from the Court of Fontaine, stamped with the Hydro Archon’s seal (you supposed you shouldn’t be surprised that Furina knew where your family lived).

According to Neuvillette, Furina had been terribly pleased to learn that he was staying overnight with you, and was so encouraged by his “passion befitting a loving husband” that she had decided to “assist” your relationship by clearing his schedule for the day and forbidding him from returning to the city or the opera house before sunset. In addition, she demanded a souvenir (edible or not) as a toll.

You suspected that Neuvillette was holding some things back from you, but decided not to pry.

“If she just wanted a souvenir, she should have just said that instead of all this banning nonsense. She seems to have learned nothing from that half-hour long lecture you gave her,” you groused, feeling annoyed on his behalf. You had told him you would understand if he wanted to return right away to argue against Furina, but he immediately shot that idea down. She was still his superior, and besides, he very much looked forward to your tour of your hometown. You had no idea why—surely he saw how boring and ordinary it was when he got here. Though, you would not deny the sense of relief you felt when you heard him say that.

“I am surprised that she didn’t threaten us with that photo,” you continued, swinging the dark blue umbrella in your hand. You had taken it with you as a precaution. It was supposed to be a balmy, sunny day today, but the weather was always unpredictable. (When he saw you bringing it with you, Neuvillette had an awkward expression on his face and looked as though he wanted to say something).

“Ah, did I not tell you? I had her destroy it after that meeting, and reminded her of the consequences of blackmail,” Neuvillette said.

“You did? That’s a relief, then,” Though it didn’t exclude the possibility of her deciding to reveal your marriage to all of Fontaine.

“It is the least I can do to make up for my inattentiveness. You need not worry, Madame. I shall spare no effort in protecting our privacy,” Neuvillette said, giving you a smile of comfort. You returned it, but was unable to hold his gaze for too long before looking away.

Truth be told, you were glad for the letter. It distracted you from what happened before that.

I can’t believe I was pressing my face up against his chest...!

Just thinking about it made you want to crawl into a hole somewhere. What other embarrassing things had you done in your sleep? You simultaneously wanted to know and didn’t. You hated how much it bothered you.

There was one other thing. You couldn’t forget the distressed face Neuvillette made—it was the first thing you saw when you woke up. You had never seen him look like that before...but then again, this was the first time he had to share a bed with someone else, if it was true that he had never engaged in any romantic dalliances before.

I doubt I gave him a good impression...

The expression disappeared quickly, and he acted like his usual self afterward, so maybe you were overthinking it. But it nagged at you.

You gave him another peek. Since you were going to be outside for the better part of the day, Neuvillette had opted to eschew his capelet. Without it, he seemed a lot less imposing, though still overdressed compared to you in your plain dress and hat.

Embarrassingly, the image of his willowy body in his loose sleepwear last night flashed through your mind. More specifically, the exposed, smooth skin at the base of his throat.

“Is there something on your mind, Madame?” Neuvillette asked. You then realized you were staring at him and quickly swiveled your head to face the front.

“Nothing at all,” you said quickly.

Though you couldn’t see his face, you could sense him raising his eyebrow. “I do believe I have known you long enough to know when you’re lying to me.”

Damn it, he got me. Let’s just get this over with. You smiled weakly, then glanced up at him. “I do have a question for you. It’s something that has been bothering me since this morning.”

“What is it? You know you can ask me anything.”

“Well then...” you took a deep breath. “Did I drool in my sleep? Or snore?”

Neuvillette blinked. He stopped walking. “What do you mean?”

“Please just answer the question.” You were already regretting this.

“...No, you did neither of those things,” he answered at last.

You held back a sigh of relief. “That’s good to hear,” you kept your tone as casual as possible. “Okay, now that that’s settled, let’s keep going.”

You marched forward resolutely. A few moments later, you heard the sound of heels striding quickly after you.

“Why did you ask me that question, Madame?” Neuvillette asked. He leaned down, peering at you worriedly. His cheeks were slightly flushed, or maybe it was just the trick of the light. “I do apologize for watching you sleep, it will never—”

“I’m not concerned about that,” you interrupted. Astonishing even yourself, you meant it. Probably because I would have done the same thing to him if I woke up first. Not that he needs to know that. “I just, um, didn’t want to disgust you or anything. People divorce over these kinds of things, I read.”

Neuvillette looked stunned at that. He placed a comforting hand on your shoulder. “Please be rest assured, Madame, that I shall never divorce you over such frivolous reasons. No matter if you drool, snore, kick in your sleep, or—”

“Okay, okay, I get it! I’m not actually worried about you divorcing me,” you laughed. Neuvillette could be surprisingly dramatic sometimes. He had that in common with Furina, though you doubted he would be happy to hear that. “If only all husbands could be like you.”

“I’m not sure that I deserve such praise, but thank you,” he smiled at you.

After that, the two of you chatted about nothing in particular as the morning sun rose higher and higher in the sky.

[blazinghotfoggynights]

I slept on it and spent all day thinking about it before deciding to say my piece.

I know Minear has turned out trash in the past. Every show has a slump.

This season has been a dumpster fire. I began pointing out the plots and subplots that were subpar years ago. Maybe season 5 or 6? I don't even remember.

We had to deal with the HenRen and Mara saga. Great idea! Could have been executed better.

That girl Buck dated when he delivered the sperm donor baby on his couch. OMG! The sperm donor arc. How could I forget?

Marisol. Zero chemistry. How do you stand next to Ryan Guzman in tight jeans and look bored? How?

Hen going to med school just to...what...say,"Nah, I'm good."

Eddie dating dead wife doppelgangers then running off to El Paso with NO JOB, buying a house, with NO JOB, selling his very expensive truck, with NO JOB, to buy a Prius and drive Uber. All to bring back the son he has every legal right to just yell at to get in the car and shut up for the entire ride back to LA because he can be mad at home. I don't know about you, but my parents didn't let me run off for months just because my panties were in a twist. They would have dared my grandparents to try to keep us apart.

Buck. Where do I even start? Dumped by a guy when he impulsively asks him to move in. Sleeps with that ex when he is obviously spiraling. Moves into the house of his missing best friend. (Missing because that story...just no.) Ex who obviously knows Buck so well and loves him so much he gave him basketball tickets for their anniversary is still hanging around.

That's like giving me golf clubs. If you do that, I know you are just choosing to be a d-bag. I'm going to pawn them and buy myself something nice. (In case you are on that guy's intellectual leve, I HATE golf.)

Then Athena has just been breaking laws for how many seasons? 3 now? More? This character that was originally a moral compass is now just busting through laws when they get in her way? What? She has been given the most awful stories to work with. They seem hastily thrown together by a high school writing student with 30 minutes left before class starts and he has to turn it in. She brings it every time though, so kudos to one of my favorites.

Now for Bobby. I don't give a crap what anyone says, the character of Bobby Nash was completely disrespected. In turn, Peter Krause saw a character he did an amazing job of portraying, bringing out the nuances of a complex character so expertly, he wasn't so complex at the end. We got Bobby and understood him. Six Feet Under was one of my favorite shows, so I'm used to Peter...ahem...exiting...early. (Great show BTW. If you haven't watched it, highly recommend!)

Could I see Bobby sacrificing himself for his team? Absolutely.

But that entire story was a mess. We all have learned to suspend disbelief when any 911 version is on, but this? I can't roll my eyes enough.

And if you are going to send off the character that brought the 118 together, shouldn't his whole "family" be there? Tim acted like Eddie Diaz didn't exist. Buck picked him up offscreen, but Tim damn sure made space for a guy who gave Bobby, Hen, and Chimney hell and the guy who did it twice.

You honestly think we believe the 118 suddenly forgives, respects, and likes Gerrard? Did Minear forget he wrote their hatred for the man in multiple episodes just this season?

[supernova41st]

Don’t worry Darling ⊹ .

Medic x Nosocomephobia!Reader

Now playing • My Elixir—Sons of Raphael ♪

A/n: Trust me this was a request but I CANNOT find the question for this one. It followed the idea of medic x paranoid reader and I liked the idea so I decided to make it reader with Nosocomephobia (fear of hospitals) I hope I executed them well. <3

Warnings: None

Divider creds ~ @saradika

Meeting

𓄼 Hospitals have always irked you since you were a kid. Something about the ambience, smell, and atmosphere of them made you uncomfortable. You could handle blood and violence, but hospitals? Hell no.

𓄼 Now, when you signed up to be a mercenary you did prepare yourself for some medical stuff to occur, however, nothing could’ve prepared you for whatever Medic was on that made you so terrified. He was like the embodiment of everything you didn’t like about hospitals x10. And after finding out his way of doing his procedures it only made you more nervous..

“Hang on—I have to be alive for the whole thing??”

“Now now (Y/N), no need to worry, as long as you play your part the surgery will be swift!”

“Don’t you have anesthesia to give me or something?”

“Ha! No. I’m afraid that is out of our budget”

“..Okay, um.. will it hurt?”

“Hahaha!! Oh my, you.. you’re quite comical my friend, hah… yes.”

𓄼 You began to dread the day that was coming, you could barely handle dentist appointments! Now some creep you don’t know basically rummage around your guts for a few hours? This was going to be hell, you just knew it.

𓄼 During that fateful day, you decided to press through. You did nearly everything you could do to get over the anxiety of it all. Breathing, Counting to 10, Naming 5 things you see, etc. And as soon as you laid onto that operating table..

Thud!

“Goodness! Are you alright—….”

𓄼 You passed out. Yeah, he didn’t even lay out any medical supplies, the texture of the operating table against your skin was already too much to bear.

Headcanons

𓄼 You’re both victims in this situation (maybe one more than the other). He tries his best to make sure you don’t pass out every time you see him, but if anything his attempts make it worse.

“Why do you have a syringe?? I thought we were just checking up on how the uber device was working!”

“It’s nothing, darling. It’s simply some Midazolam, I went out to purchase it just for you! Now if you’ll just hold still..”

𓄼 You passed out as soon as he the needle graced your skin. I mean.. at least it kinda worked?

𓄼 Even when you get use to his appointments (meaning not passing out as much) he’s still more gentle around you.

𓄼 He’ll warn you about what he’s about to do and will give you a heads up on if there will be anything startling involved. He also makes sure to bring nitrous gas to help you calm down if needed.

𓄼 He feels guilty about it, but he enjoys talking you through giving you shots. Not in an arousing way, but he enjoys the idea of you being comforted by him. And god, he loves it when you hold his hand, he’ll sometimes worry that he’d be too focus on you holding onto him than injecting you.

“It’s alright, (Y/N), deep breaths..”

“sigh Okay..”

“You’re almost there, you’re doing very well, my love.. and done! See? As I said, only a pinch”

𓄼 If the smell of his clinic disturbs you, then he’ll also remember to light a candle at least an hour before your appointments. He’d specifically choose lavender to help soothe your nerves.

𓄼 He’ll also play some classical music in the background, not only does it calm your nerves but it also helps him focus. He’d remember your favorites and play them more often then other..

“You’ve been playing that one a lot lately”

“How could I not? It has a very nice tone, and I’ve grown tiresome of the other ones”

“Aww, you sure you’re not playing it just for me?”

“Hm, who’s to say”

[thegreyjester]

(SORRY FOR THE BAD IMAGES! I’m terrible at pictures!!)

Book Review: AMERICAN PSYCHO How to Make a Killing in Business… and Life by Patrick Bateman (aka Robb Pearlman)

The summary offered by the book: Looking for the best way to get that coveted reservation at Dorsia? The dos and dont's of choosing a business card? How to provide deep-dive backstories on the importance of pop music groups like Genesis or Huey Lewis and the News? Need advice on how to slash the competition, deal with the challenges of letting work bleed into personal life, or dispose of your rivals? Filled with iconic images of the American psycho himself, this compendium of "tips" draws upon the dark, campy humor of the 2000 hit film. Patrick Bateman's How To Make a Killing in Business... and Life is the perfect gift for fans of film, horror, and humor.

Now... if you were expecting a super-serious book that gives more introspection about Patrick's thoughts or character... it's not. The book is composed of three things. Quotes from the movie/book, edited images, and tips that make references from the story.

Really, the Foreword accurately describes what type of book you are getting into, here:

I LIVE IN THE AMERICAN GARDENS BUILDING ON West 81st Street on the 11th floor. My name is Patrick Bateman. You may have heard of me. But did you hear that I'm utterly insane? Here's the thing: you're not terribly important to me, but I know that I'm important to you. Important enough for you to buy this book. I guess I should thank you for that. So, because I understand why you'd want to be me, here's what I'm going to do: I'm going to tell you how to be just like me. But before we get started, you should know that there is an idea of a Patrick Bateman. Some kind of abstraction. But there is no real me.

Now you have an idea of what this book is like, it largely just quotes/regurgitates quotes from the movie as tips.

Page 10 talks about his morning routine—nothing new is added. Page 14 is what he told Jean when she offered him ice cream. The 19th page is the bold-striped shirt talk he had faked before Kimball entered his office. Page 20 is the continuation of 19.

However! That is not to say that the book just blatantly copies everything! Sure, while it is heavily quoting the movie/book (the Killer Tunes segment on pages 73-74, 78, and 80, to my immense disappointment, just blatantly quotes the novel and book, with few tweaks), there are original things from this book, one of my favorite being this:

Like a slaughterhouse processing tons of meat annually, corporations can churn through dozens of employees every fiscal year, It can be practically impossible to remember everyone, let alone care enough about them to notice when they're gone. Your colleagues, however, should all know who you are. But if a colleague mistakes you for someone else—even if that someone is an idiot—don't take immediate action. Rather than biting their head off, gather enough embarrassing personal and professional ammunition to humiliate them at a later date. This means disarm them with charm until you're ready to stick the knife in. (Pg. 49)

Personally, I think the book gets better on pages 41 and onward. However! That doesn't mean if find what was before it, or after it unfunny! I personally loved these:

It's not the '80s anymore, so you can totally lean into the whole Yale thing. (Pg. 29)

If a colleague has wronged you, shoot them! An email, ha ha. If that doesn't work, report them to HR. (Pg. 53)

Remember, nobody will ever truly understand who you are or what you do. And since they won't know the difference between mergers and acquisitions and murders and executions you might as well slap them in the face with a whole lot of fantastical-sounding truths about yourself. (Pg. 95)

Now, before writing this, I read a review of the book from Amazon, and I understand their grievances. I can see where they're coming from. This book has multiple glaring errors, especially for fans who know the original text and love the movie well. That being said, I still find it very amusing to read. Especially on certain parts. So, if you're looking for a deep commentary on or a faithful rendition of Bateman or an analysis of the movie/book, this book would leave you disappointed. But if you're after a quick laugh, you might find it here.

Also, Also. My favorite picture from the book is this. He's such a goober.

44 out of the 116 pages (Including the Killer Tune segment) are actual text, discounting the images and the quote segments which have bigger and different fonts/colors.

Publisher: Rizzoli Universe

Rating: 4 stars | ★★★★

Reasoning: They could've done so much more! Personally, I utterly loved it when they strayed a bit on different subjects (Patrick's a member of an HOA/condo board and I freaking utterly adored the secretary segment, which I’ll post if someone asks) or occasionally made a reference. But I really wished they had done something different for the Killer Tunes segment! Like, like, a new take on the music or even different music altogether! Hell—even a subtle change like in the apartheid talk in the WAR AND PIECE segment. Patrick literally said it wasn't the 1980s anymore! GAH! I both love it and hate it! But I'll definitely use some parts of it for fanfic ideas. Anyway—that's my (un)professional review!

[lemotmo]

Hi!!!

So about the dead baby, the show was directing us to believe that the mother was right, that her baby was alive. The mother made her case make sense to Athena and the audience, to the point where the obvious assumption was that she was right. But then the show threw us all for a loop and said that her baby is actually dead, that he died in that fire 8 years ago. I think the show is doing the reverse for Bobby - the show is constantly showing that he's dead. Nothing the show has done hints to Bobby being alive at all to the characters.* No cryptic messages over the phone, no doubt from the characters, none of them are in the denial stage of grief, etc. Bobby is truly dead in the show to the characters, which is when I think the show will throw us for a loop again and tell us that Bobby is alive.

It's a direct parallel in that the baby and Bobby are theoretically exact opposites - the mother thought that her son was alive and taken, but in reality was buried in an empty grave. Bobby on the other hand is thought of as dead and is buried in an empty grave, but in reality is actually alive and taken. It's clever in that it keeps the audience on its toes - it's not an obvious parallel to Bobby, so they can keep the illusion of death for another episode.

The plot itself was well executed, I just hate how it was in the Funeral Episode because that should have focused on everyone's grief. I agree that we got a good look at Athena and Chimney's grief and anger, but everyone else's kinda fell to the side, because this episode was trying to do too much in too little time. (Still have hope for 8x17 and 8x18 to cover that though!) Had they done the baby plot in 8x17, and focused a bit more on the characters in 8x16, I could see it having a much more positive take.

*Now the audience is a different story - the fact that we didn't see a body, that his body was held by the government for 2 weeks, and only let it go so early because Chim was calling over and over again, the funeral being held in the Hall of Resurrection, the bridge jumper in 8x08...it's all very suspicious in my eyes, but not everyone's.*

Hope you have a Great Day!! (Now, that the synopsis is out for 8x17, I have a better idea of the episode and have new speculation, and I will send that in an ask later, because this one is already really long and it is late here!)

Yep. It's all a little too much to not mean anything. I agree.

It was indeed a bad move to put all of this in the funeral episode, but I think they were short on time. They still have so many other loose ends I'm pretty sure they want to neatly tie up by the end of the season. So they decided to put all of the baby story in the funeral episode and it just didn't work. Bobby and his connection with everyone on the 118 was almost treated as an afterthought, except for Chimney. That was not the right move for an important send off like that.

I do think we shouldn't underestimate the GA. Most people are quite good at picking up when something is 'not quite right' or 'not adding up'.

I had a great day! Hope you are having a wonderful day as well!

[saras-almanac]

BuckTommyWeekend Day 1: Alternate First Meeting

Title:  This seat taken?

Fandom:  911 (ABC)

Pairing:  Buck/Tommy

Summary:  Buck and Tommy meet at a restaurant for the first time. For the prompt: Alternate First Meeting for @bucktommyweek

Notes: There’s so many potential first meetings for these two both within canon and outside of it. I’m behind on writing for this weekend so just went with one that’s a bit quicker, but will probably expand on in the future before posting to AO3. (And/or might do more potential first meetings because there’s so many options and not all of them will lead to them actually being together at that specific moment in time, but it’d be fun…)

Buck sat at the bar, pretending to check his phone while he glanced over at where Josh and his date were sitting. Josh was seemingly having a good time, plus his date was pretty cute, so maybe this would be a win for him. Buck hoped so.

“This seat taken?”

Buck startled and looked over and saw a man—a very attractive man—stood next to him, inclining a hand toward the stool next to him.

Buck shook his head. “N-no. It’s all yours. I mean, if you want it.”

The man smiled and sat down. “Thanks. Just need to wait for my order.”

As he sat down, Buck noticed a logo on the side of this man’s jacket, one that looked incredibly familiar as it was on Buck’s own work clothes.

“Woah. Is that an LAFD jacket? Are you a firefighter?” Buck asked excitedly.

The man smiled. “Yeah. Work at Harbor station now though. Mostly flying planes and helicopters rather than running into any burning buildings.”

“That’s so cool. I’ve always thought being able to fly a plane, like pilot one, would feel like you have super powers,” Buck said. “Does it feel like that?”

“I suppose that’s a good way to look at it,” the man said. “I’m Tommy, by the way.”

“Evan Buckley,” Buck said, reaching out a hand. Tommy shook it, even at the awkward angle since they were sitting so close together. “So when did you learn to fly?”

“A while ago, back when I was in the Army,” Tommy said.

“Have you always been air support for LAFD?” Buck asked.

“No,” Tommy said. “I was on the ground or many years, but just felt like I was missing it. Transferred to Harbor five, six years ago now. I really missed flying so it was a good choice.”

“I bet,” Buck said. “If I could fly, I’d probably never want to be on the ground.”

“Well, I can give you a tour of the place if you’re interested,” Tommy offered kindly. “Show you some of the toys, how things work.”

“That would be awesome,” Buck said. “But I don’t want to trouble you. I mean, you’re just waiting for your food and I’m talking your ear off about work. I-I’m sure the last thing you want to do is talk about your job after just getting off a shift.”

“I wouldn’t offer if I didn’t mean it,” Tommy said. “And I could have always ignored you or told you I didn’t want to talk about work if I wanted.”

“I guess,” Buck said. “I forget sometimes that not everyone likes talking about their job.”

“So then I guess I have to ask, what do you do?”

“Oh, um,” Buck rubbed at the back of his neck. “I’m a firefighter.”

“No kidding,” Tommy said with a laugh. “Which station?”

“The 118,” Buck said proudly.

“Now you’re fucking with me,” Tommy said. “I transferred to Harbor from the 118.”

“That’s crazy! So you do you know Cap? Captain Bobby Nash?” Buck asked.

“Yeah,” Tommy said. “He was just getting settled there when I transferred.”

“What about Hen? You’ve got to know Chimney. I think he’s been there since it was built.”

Tommy smiled and his nose crinkled and Buck had never seen anything more adorable in his entire life. “Howie and I go way back, from before he was called Chimney. And Hen, she’s one of the best firefighters I’ve ever worked with.”

“They’re the best,” Buck said. “It’s so crazy that you know them too!”

Buck glanced over at Josh again. He’d be furious with himself if he got distracted by this god-like man sitting next to him when his friend needed him. Still seemed to be going well.

“I don’t mean to pry, but I do have to ask,” Tommy started, “You’re not stalking those men, are you?”

Buck whipped his head over to look at him. “What?”

“It’s just, I saw you watching them when I first got here. And now you’re looking over again. Just checking things are… all right,” Tommy said.

Buck felt himself blush a bit because he was the world’s worst undercover wingman. “Okay so one of those guys is my friend, Josh. He’s had some rough luck dating and he was feeling a bit nervous, so I offered to come and hang out at the bar while he was on his date. Just in case anything happened, he’d have back up or whatever he needed.”

Tommy blinked. “You’re giving up your night to sit alone at the bar just in case your friend’s date turned out to be an asshole?”

“Yeah. I guess,” Buck said.

Tommy smiled at him, shaking his head fondly. “That’s really sweet of you.”

“I’m just helping out a friend,” Buck said, feeling uncomfortable. “I’d do it for anyone.”  

Before they could talk any more, a waitress came out with Tommy’s food, stealing his attention. Their chat was less than 10 minutes but Buck felt like he could have spent hours talking with Tommy. He tried not to be annoyed that his food came and he was going to leave—the man had probably just gotten off a shift, probably a twelve or thirty-six hour shift, based on it being night. Tommy deserved to grab his food and then head home to eat and crash.

It didn’t mean that it didn’t suck though. But it’s fine. Buck would go back to checking his phone and keeping an eye out for Josh.

Tommy placed a hand on Buck’s shoulder. “Well, it was a delight to bump into you and I enjoyed our conversation. You made the end of a long thirty-six hours speed by as I waited for my food.”

“I’ve been told I do that,” Buck said, completely distracted by the weight of Tommy’s hand on his shoulder.  

Tommy laughed like Buck had told the funniest joke he’d ever heard. He removed his hand and smiled. “And I’m serious about giving you a tour if you want.”

“I’d like that,” Buck said. “Um, should I call the station?”

Tommy smiled again and shook his head. “It’ll be easier if you just let me know directly. I can make sure there’s time and be the one to give you the tour.”

Tommy reached down to grab the pen sitting on top of his receipt and then scribbled his number on a napkin. “Take care, Evan.”

Hearing Evan come out of Tommy’s mouth was surprising, but surprising in a good way—in a way that Buck wasn’t going to think much about right now. “Yeah. Yeah. Uh, you too, Tommy. I’ll—I’ll text you.”

“Sounds good.” Tommy grabbed his bag. “Oh, and good luck with the rest of your date.”

With that, Tommy laughed a little and then walked out, leaving Buck sitting there, carefully holding the napkin and wondering exactly what was happening with fate right now. Maybe his luck was turning around.

[ricky-mortis]

Curtwen Week Day 4: Haunted

[seaofreverie]

Sparks will be real in 50 days.

[psychopomp-namine]

.

[miladydewintcr]

Has anyone talked yet about how Morrigan is literally named after an ancient Celtic triple goddess? Three distinct, powerful women who sometimes come together as one being.

I didn't notice exactly what they'd done with her on my first Veilguard playthrough (and tbh I am kicking myself over it now) but I do feel better about her merging with Flemeth, knowing that? Bc a triple goddess is 3 separate goddesses, that work well together.

And looking at it from that perspective, I feel like Morrigan hasn't become her mother at all, which is one of the main criticisms I've seen for her Veilguard story arc (Completely valid take ftr!! I also thought that too on my first run!).

I think, too, that this is why Kieran couldn't ever be in Veilguard (ignoring the fact he doesn't exist in some world states). Unlike Flemeth, who deliberately coerced her child into doing the dark ritual, who thrust her directly into danger, who placed such an inordinate amount of weight on her shoulders, Morrigan did the exact opposite with Kieran. She kept him away from everything in Veilguard. Knowing he has an old god's spirit inside him (just as she herself does now!), knowing he could probably help, she still kept him the fuck away. She kept him safe.

That was all Morrigan imo. There was none of Flemeth, in that.

[puppppppppy]

Gripped with ideas but….. the panelling………….

[readymades2002]

rewatching gravityfalls since its the topic du jour and running into the exact same hurdle i did when it was airing which is simply aggressively not caring about ford and his associated stuff