#i lie in bed and all i can think is 'what if the floor falls down right below me'
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Telling myself daily affirmations but instead of 'I'm confident' and 'everything will work out okay' its 'my floor wont cave in while I'm sleeping' 'cracks in brick walls are normal' 'houses suddenly falling down is more common in shoddily built new homes, not places that are 30 years old' 'my bedroom is structurally sound' 'the furniture in my room isnt so heavy that the floor will cave in' 'the noises are temperature changes, this is normal' 'my window wont shatter if it gets too windy' 'my house is structurally sound'
#ive always had a fear of multi storey houses and bunk beds and exposed beams and just things that could fall on me#but for the past week its been crazy#i lie in bed and all i can think is 'what if the floor falls down right below me'#maybe i should tell my therapist about this lol#I'm trying to tell myself that its fine and i trust engineering and the beams are strong but also.. what if structural mould?
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summary: the world crumbled before you could experience the touch of another. Joel does his best to keep you innocent for as long as he can.
pairing: Jackson!Joel Miller x afab virgin!reader.
warnings: 18+ mdni. established, undefined relationship. PUSSY RUBBING. fluids galore. just the tip. perv!joel. unspecified age gap. fingering. dirty talk. overstimulation. male masturbation. FEELS. Joel is a conflicted old man. reader is able bodied. no Ellie. w.c. 2.9k
an: i watched a porn clip and instantly went rabid thinking about jackson!joel.
-> follow up to a glimpse of heaven but it's not necessary to read the first part.
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Like most of Jackson, the house you share with Joel is quiet and calm when night falls. Rain softly patters against the window as you lie in bed, wide awake. Another night of fruitless sleep under your belt.
You huff irritatedly, your hand collapsing against the mattress as you bitterly kick your bedspread onto the floor. Your oversized shirt clings to your body, your skin dewy from the exertion, and you're close to crying. Your limbs are wrought and overworked after hours of touching yourself with no orgasm to show for it.
Your hand won't cut it; it isn't enough. It can't reach all those sensitive spots that make you float among the stars.
Warmth pools in your abdomen as you think of one that's the perfect size.
A hazy hue of yellow light pours under your bedroom door as it spills from the room across the hall.
Joel.
It takes a long time to get to know someone, but they tend to meld with your soul once you do in one way or another.
From the start, Joel was intimidating. He was so frayed around the edges that you were afraid he'd completely unravel in the middle of your journey. He didn't seem to care for your company as the two of you traveled across the plains to Jackson, hesitation poisoning every fiber of your being, but you kept on with the strange man since no one else was willing to trek across the states. You desperately needed a new life, a fresh start away from the Boston QZ, and Jackson sounded like the perfect spot.
Over time, Joel opened up, conversing little by little as you drove for miles across the now barren US. Usually, after you had a close call with raiders or the lone gunman, he'd go silent, the weight of protecting someone other than himself sinking further into his soul, consuming that much further.
What you never expected was for him to be your first touch.
Sweltering tension slowly grew like a wildfire. Catching each other's curious stares, lingering fingers, and salacious banter until, one night, he slid a cautious hand into your panties. He claimed your untouched sex when you confessed over a roaring fire and a bottle of whiskey that you'd never been with another. His weathered hands were gentle as he sunk his fingers into your core, watching with rabid fascination as you came for the first time, gasping from his touch.
The following day, as he drove you across the interstate with the sun slowly rising, he made sure you knew that wouldn't happen again. "I'm much too old. Don't wanna waste your time with a mean ol' grump like me."
You didn't bring it up again.
One month after settling into Jackson, picking bedrooms, and deciding who would do which chores, Joel had his first taste of you.
It wasn't supposed to happen.
You chewed your dinner slowly in the modestly sized dining room across from Joel. You were so lost in thought that he was concerned enough to ask what was wrong.
"What does it mean when a man eats you out?" you naively pondered, causing him to choke on his veggies.
Joel had never looked so red before as he took a long drink of whiskey. You instantly apologized, explaining that you overheard a group of women conversing while you tended the communal garden.
He raised a hand, curbing your frantic rambles. "S'ok. Figured you'd be learnin' things. Just didn' think I'd be the one you'd ask."
"But I trust you."
His jaw twitched at your words.Ā Ā
Later that night, Joel fell to his knees at the edge of your bed and tossed your legs over his broad shoulders. "Never tasted a pussy so sweet," he mumbled against your glistening folds as you ran your fingers through his graying curls. You came multiple times on his tongue, grinding his whiskered jaw while he hungrily lapped at your soaked folds like he was dying of thirst.
You didn't bring it up again.
It's warmer in Jackson now. The sun hangs longer in the sky. Snow boots and jackets are stowed away until the next freeze.
You slink from the warmth of your bed and pad sockless across the hall. Lightening flickers brightly under the starry sky. The night rain storm slowly whirls through the city, soaking everything in its path.
Joel's door is open. A soft smile tugs at your lips; it's his way of saying he's still up. He keeps it ajar while he reads before rolling onto his side and bidding goodnight to the world.
Three soft knocks alert Joel from the guitar-building manual he's currently reading. Dread clouds his mind for a moment, wondering why you'd be knocking on his door at this time of night, but he takes a deep breath and grounds himself in the softness of his bed.
"Yeah?" he calls out. His tone is rough around the edges after a long day on patrol.
You poke your head around the door with a timid smirk. He looks at you over his reading glasses before marking his spot and laying his book on the side table.
You don't say anything as you stride into his room. He notices your oversized shirt swaying at your knees before you climb into his bed and curl against his side like a cat.Ā
He drapes an arm around your shoulder, unconsciously pulling you closer.
"'Nother bad dream?" he questions with a low rumble.
You shake your head. "Can't sleep."
You nuzzle your face into the crook of his shoulder and feel him nod, understanding the endless struggle for a night of peaceful sleep. It's improved since moving to Jackson, but the dreams never end.
Silence fills the bedroom except for the soft pitter-patter of rain against the roof. Joel leans against the headboard, sighs through his nose, and lets his thoughts drift. He's content to sit with you in his arms for as long as possible, even if that makes him selfish.
He wonders if you hope to find someone to settle down with, someone less ridged and mentally maimed, someone less him.
The thought drives a stake through his heart.
He'd be crazy to say he didn't love being around you. Your laugh and lopsided smile took the first brick out of his impenetrable fortress when you spied a deer and her calf frolicking in an open field in Kansas. From then on, it became easier for him to let his walls down.
When you came to him with those big doe eyes and urges about wanting to know what it's like to be touched and desired, he gave in each time despite his reasoning.
He would masturbate each time after getting his hands on you, also thinking about the early days when he'd catch glimpses of you changing or the time he first saw you naked while showering at the YMCA.Ā
He's still trying to figure out what to make of you. Friends? Lovers? He certainly didn't mean to fall head over heels. Love had no place in his heart, but he'd be a fool to say he wasn't extremely fond of you.
"Can you make me feel good again?" your lithe voice broke the silence.
Joel stops breathing. Your question doused him like a cold bucket of water. He knew this would come back and haunt him.
His hand curls tight around your shoulder as he wrestles with the devil on his shoulder. "Told ya we shouldn't keep doin' this, Sweetheart," he reasons, trying not to break your heart.
"But I can't make myself feel as good as when you've done it. I've tried!" You whine, burying your face into his chest.
"S'not that I don't wanna," he admits, soothing your soft cries. "S'just, you're too precious to do that wit' someone like me."
You lift your head and brazenly brush your lips against the exposed skin of his collarbone, earning a low groan as he curls a large hand around the back of your neck. He tugs you away from his skin, your lips still forming a tight 'O', and pins you with a stern gaze.
"Joel, it hurts." Your watery eyes and trembling bottom lip are his downfall.
"Lay back, Sweetheart, and spread your legs," he orders with a husky tone.
You don't make a noise; too afraid he'll stop if you do. Your cunt beats against the gusset of your panties as you lay on your back, spreading and bending both legs at the knee, just like he taught you.
A warm breath fans down your face as he shifts down your body before kneeling between your legs and tracing teasing fingers over your covered mound. His nails lightly scratch along the worn cotton, making you suck in a frantic breath. He slips a practiced hand beneath the crotch of your panties and deftly explores your folds, gently rubbing small circles on your clit after wetting his fingers with the arousal that's pouring from your cunt.
"Oh, she's achin' real bad, huh?" he groans as your opening clenches beneath his wandering touch.
"Joel, please, I need-" You gasp, hips wantonly grinding against his hand, desperate for any type of friction.
The muscles in his jaw ache. It's only natural you'd be wanting more.
Before he thinks twice, Joel draws his cock out from his sweatpants. Your stomach cramps at the sight as it smacks against his belly; he's massive.
His cock hangs heavy between his thighs like a solid, dangerous threat. It weeps from the dusky tip, shiny liquid dripping from the crown as he squeezes his hand around the girthy base peppered with dark gray, wiry hair.
"Got somethin' that'll make you feel good, sweet girl." he grits, tapping his cock against the covered crux of your pussy. It thwaps devastatingly against your clit, forcing a gasp from your lips as mind-numbing pleasure races up your spine and leaves you staring dumbly up at him.
"S'that what you need? Need my cock to keep 'er from achin so bad'?" his cock is searing as it lies in wait atop your panty-clad mound. You swear you can feel his blood pumping steadily into his shaft.
He cautiously thrusts his hips, sliding his length along your cotton-covered mound. Your slick arousal seeps thru the material, wetting the thin cotton and creating a sensuous touch as he glides along your cunt.
He shoves your shirt up over your chest, exposing your breasts to his hungry gaze. He licks his lips, "Such'a beauty."
Your cheeks flame at his words. Having such a man say things about you makes you lightheaded.
Joel groans as your panties practically are now see-through from your combined fluids staining the cotton, "Oh, baby." You whine at his pet name. "I got ya. Keep those legs open, just like I taught ya. S'good girl."
He keeps a steady pace, sawing back and forth over your extremely soaked mound. Your puffy pussy lips stick to the soaked cotton, leaving nothing to Joel's imagination. He glides easily along your slit, your juices smoothing his path until your arching your back and chanting his name like a prayer.
Watching you orgasm under his touch is enough to drive him wild. He throws all sense of logic out the window. He's okay with being selfish again.
"Let's get these off, yeah." He hooks two fingers under the elastic and slides your panties off before his words register in your euphoric haze. "Feel even better without 'em."
He swallows hard at the sight laid out before him. The sheets splay and curve around your naked body, making you look like an ethereal being sent to test his limits.
"Gonna give 'er a kiss, Sweetheart," his deep timbre vibrates your body as he draws close and touches the bulbous tip of his cock to your exposed folds. Blood rushes to your cunt instantly, bordering on the edge of pain. You cry out from the intense contact, and arousal slips freely down your crack as he traces his cockhead up and down your soaked slit.
"How's she feel?" He anchors his head, looking down at you from under his lashes.
"S'nice," you half whisper, half moan. The wanton bliss slowly consumes you the more he rubs against your sticky folds, keeping a hand locked around his girthy base, his crown glistening with your combined arousal.
Your eyes tear open, back arching like a bow, when he cants his hips and taps his cock square in the center of your cunt.
"M'not gonna fuck you, sweet girl, wanna keep you whole," he declares, holding true to his word despite the overwhelming need to claim you.
He can't be the one to sully you. "Ain' much left'a this world that's as sweet n' pure as you."
Your core quivers as his dusky, throbbing crown glides along your glistening seam. He tentatively explores uncharted areas, brows furrowed with concentration, fighting with inner demons who want to claim, corrupt, and mold you for only his touch.
His name leaves your lips with a mess of desperate, frustrated moans, "Please, Joel."
He snaps out of his haze. He's done almost everything he can to keep you safe and protected in this new way of life. He'll be damned if he doesn't grant you anything you ask for.
"S'hurtin' somethin' fierce, huh?" He grunts, angling his hips until his cock lines up with your fluttering hole. "Bet she needs somethin' big'er than fingers to ease 'er throbbin'."
His cock catches on your opening, forcing a hiss through his clenched teeth. As tight as you are, he can't stop from pushing into your warmth. He blocks out any sense of reasoning that's shouting from the back of his mind as he slowly nudges his cock into your weeping, inviting hole.
Joel goes brain-dumb momentarily, watching in immoral awe as your core ever so slowly swallows his fat tip and breaches your quivering hole, forcing a raspy whine from your throat.
So warm, safe, and wet.
Joel's never felt anything like you. He wants to bury himself, slide his cock as deep as he can, claim every inch, endlessly fill you with his cum, and keep you only for him.
You frantically reach for him, hands clutching the air as he rubs a callous thumb over your clit while keeping a steady hold on the base of his cock.
"S'all she's gonna get," he states, returning to his senses and hissing when your cunt tightens. "S'just the tip."
A soft begging whine bubbles from your lips as you extend your arms, needing something solid to hold before latching onto his wrists.
Your hips move on their own, desperate to feel his length completely shunted in your velvet warmth, but brute hands envelop your hips and pin them to the bed.
He shakes his head, salt and pepper curls fraying across his forehead. "Don' be greedy now." He tuts, narrowing his gaze down at you.
A garbled mess of nonsense tumbles from your lips as your fingernails dig into his muscular, hairy forearms.
"I know. S'big, huh?" He lands a solemn thumb on your clit, rubbing tender circles around the tiny bud. "Stay wit' me, sweet girl. Wanna feel you come on my cock."
Your mind spins. It's all too much, and yet, not enough. Your head tosses from side to side, and you're frantic to survive, breathing hard and fast, waiting for the drop to come and, at the same time, never wanting it to come.
"Don't I deserve it? Keepin' you safe all this time." Joel muses, stroking his cock in time with his teasing thumb. His eyes never leave where he's splitting you open. He's barely penetrating you, but it's enough to know if he had, you'd be struggling to take him.
"Come on, Sweetheart. Let go f'me," he urges, his touch growing faster. Severe, tightly drawn circles tease you closer to the edge.
Your stomach flips. A heaviness settles in your throat, your heart lodging in the tight confines, your blood pumping faster and faster. A lithe whine slithers free, escaping into the dimly lit room and burrows into Joel's mind.
His jaw clenches, and a dark growl rumbles from his chest, "Thatta' girl. Make'a fuckin' mess'a me."
Your dripping hole quivers and throbs around his swollen tip as you come with a silent scream, body locking taut, trying its best to engulf his length entirely.
Joel curses, jerking his length with long, steady tugs and rubbing his weeping, cream-covered tip around your soaked folds before his spine goes straight, and he yanks his cock from your core, curling in on himself and spilling his seed all over your belly with a deep, gravelly moan.
You sag into his sheets, spent with a shiny thin layer of dew and white ropes of spend painted across your abdomen.
"Shit." Joel curses, breathing heavily as he holds himself by his hands, which press into the mattress by your head, keeping you locked beneath him.
You hold his studious gaze. His dark eyes ruminate, tinged with mood, as his gaze drills down into your very core, threatening to demolish your soul. You resign that this was nothing special. Just another night you won't talk about again.Ā Ā
Joel eases off of you with a grunt, his bones aching from the tension despite the brief, pleasurable relief, and tucks his cock back away into his sweatpants. He shuffles to the bathroom momentarily before returning with a damp washcloth.
He wipes the cloth over your belly and between your thighs, cleaning the combined arousal from your skin before chucking the rag into the hamper with a sigh.
"I know," you mutter, grimacing as you roll onto your side and sit up, tugging your shirt down. "I won't mention it again."
A solid, warm hand on your shoulder stops your retreat. "Stay," Joel whispers with soft, yearning eyes. "I wan' you to stay, sweet girl."
feel free to scream at me -> š
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#joel miller#joel miller x reader#joel miller x you#joel miller smut#joel miller fanfic#pedro pascal
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snip, snip, snip
synopsis: giving a trim to your boyfriend turns into something more. wc: 2.7k pairings: choso x reader. geto x reader. nanami x reader. content: MDNI. smut (unprotected sex, cowgirl (choso), bow pose (geto), oral - fem!receiving, fingering, creampie, messy kisses) just lots of nsfw š + not proofread as usual a/n: missed yāall!! have no idea what i wrote but i hope you enjoy reading this as much as i enjoyed writing it.
š¼ ā. šā. š¼ Ėļ½”š āš¼ ā. šā. š¼ Ėļ½”š āš¼ ā. šā. š¼ Ėļ½”š āš¼ ā. šā. š¼ Ėļ½”š āš¼ ā. choso kamo
"owwā¦ fuckā you hear choso cuss from the bedroom. āare you okay?ā you check in from the bathroom just having finished your night time routine. he walks in rubbing his eye, a tiny pout playin on his lips āi think thereās something in my eye, it hurts,ā he whines.
ālet me see,ā you say. he bends down and moves closer to your face. you notice the whites of his eye are turned a shade of light red, probably from all the rubbing heās been doing. he hisses as you spot a short strand of hair in his lower lid and pull it out. āitās hair,ā you place it in his palm. āprobably from your bangs,ā you add on. his pout grows and he stares at the strand in silence for a minute before he asks ācan you cut them?ā
he sits on a stool in front of the mirror, a bashful smile on his lips. you place a cloth on the floor to catch the hair and wrap another around his neck.
you quickly brush his hair and separate the bangs. he grabs your waist and pulls you in closer when you start cutting his bangs. distracted by the night gown under your robe he starts squirming to get a closer look.
āchoso!ā you yelp when you feel him kiss over your clothed boob. āsorry,ā he bashes his eyelashes at you. āsit still or iāll mess upā you scold him.
he scoffs in return. you reach up to snip a few stray strands of hair that are in front of his face, and align them with a cute pout of concentration on your face. his eyes remain fixed on you, silently observing your every move, while his heart is filled with an array of intense emotions that overwhelm him. his grip on your waist tightens.
your eyes slowly shift from his freshly trimmed bangs to meet his gaze and a gentle smile curves up the corner of your lips. he pulls you closer ā his hand deftly undoes the knot on your robe.
the fabric falls open, revealing a blue silk slip with lace detail covering your cleavage and his breath hitches. your heart begins to race at the anticipation of his next move.
"choso.." you feel his hand inch higher under your slip. you squeeze his shoulders when his finger trace your flimsy panties ā a light sheen of your need coats his finger. you unwrap the cloth from around his neck, and he quickly stands up. he taps the back of your thighs, signaling you to jump into his arms.
he walks over to the bed and sits down with you on top. āfuck me,ā he whispers as his lips brush over yours. your slipās moved up and bunched around your thighs as you start grinding on his hardening cock.
he hums into the kiss ā satisfied by the little bit of friction. you move a hand to in his hair, tugging at the strands to stop his movements.
he pulls back with a grin. you kiss a path from his jaw down to his neck and suck at the flesh on his throat. he lets out a deep groan as you wrap a hand around his throat and push him to lie down on his back.
you quickly push down his pants and his dick springs out and hits his abdomen. his tipās a little red with pre-cum leaking. you rub the pre cum up and down his dick ā prepping it to be inside you.
his breathing grows erratic and he tries to keep his moans quiet. you lace your fingers with his, near his head and he turns to give it a sweet peck. you both gasp in unison as you slide down his slicked length. his other grips your waist tighter ā probably leaving a bruise.
your wetness makes it easy to move up and down his cock. āyou can be loud baby,ā you groan breathlessly and he immediately lets out a whine as if he was waiting for your permission.
at this angle his cock was hitting all the right spots in you. he wraps a hand around your throat and pulls you down for a messy kiss. his tongue laps at yours and he sucks at your bottom lip before finally letting you go.
he pulls down the straps of your slip still shielding your boobs from his lustful eyes. he gulps at the view from below. silently thanking whatever higher power led you to him and allowed him to experience this moment of utter bliss and pleasure.
you place your hands on his chest and pick up the pace. pussy clamping down on his cock ā creating a circle of white around his length.
he notices you slow down as your thighs burn from the movement. ācome on, baby. donāt stop now,ā he urges you. his hips buck up into yours and you moan in surprise āahh fuckā. his hands move under your ass to help you keep going.
your head falls into his neck as he keeps fucking into you from underneath. āiām closeā he pants. you bite his shoulder as your orgasm rushes through you, too blissed out to warn him but he notices anyway. his hand moves from under your ass to rubbing your back. soothing you from your high.
and he comes right after with a loud moan of your name. you hum satisfied at the feeling of his cum filling you completely.
suguru geto
heās sitting on a stool facing the bathroom mirror as you stand behind him, trimming the ends of his hair.
and when you finally move in front of him to cut his front pieces, he keeps trying to put his hand under your shirt. you smack his hand away and he sits there with a pout and you immediately feel bad.
āsorry,ā you say meekly. he doesnāt respond instead he looks down at his lap. āsuguru,ā you call out to him but he ignores you.
āsuguru,ā you try again but he doesnāt reply. you sigh and continue your task. you move behind him once youāre done and he smiles at you through the mirror, āthank you for the haircut, babyā.
a little confused at the change in his mood, you lean down to give him a quick peck when he looks up at you expectantly. his tongue pokes out and traces your lips and over your chin. you giggle when his tongue moves towards the underside of your jaw. you walk back to the bedroom and he shrugs off the hair and follows you. he spreads your legs and lays atop you. his tongue meshes with yours and your boobs buck up into his chest. he smiles against your lips, pulling back to admire your sprawled out figure.
he bunches up your shirt and places it in your mouth. "can you stay like this for me?" he asks in a hushed tone. you nod and he laughs under his breath as he hears a muffled yes. he places kisses over the expanse of your body and moves between your legs.
he holds eye contact as he pushes your panties to the side. you shudder when he spreads your lips and inserts a finger in you. his gaze moves down to your hole sucking him in desperately.
he leans to peck your clit once and then twice. his lips wrap around your clit, sucking it in slowly as he inserts a second finger into your needy cunt.
one second youāre whining at the way his mouth is making you feel and then before you can register the retraction of his mouth and fingers, you yelp a surprised whimper when you feel his hand come down at the flesh of your ass.
as you come down from the shock of the slap on your ass, you realize that heās got you laying on your stomach.
you guess you shouldāve known smacking his hand away earlier would have its consequences. however you didnāt mind this. his hand rubs soothingly at the reddened skin of your ass before another smack resounds throughout the room and you groan in slight pleasure.
āyou like that, huh?ā a lilt to his voice. āharder,ā you mumble into the sheets. and he abides with your request. after all heās gotta give you, whatever you ask for.
after two more hard spanks he moves over your legs. his hands rub at the flesh of your ass while he lines himself up with your hole. he rubs his cock head at your glistening pussy before he pushes in.
you gasp when you feel his hands pushing your legs up to hold himself steady as he starts fucking into you from behind. he keeps up a fast and hard pace that has your brain turning into mush. he gently puts your legs back down and you whimper at the mix of pleasure and pain you feel from having your legs up for so long.
he grabs your hips and slides a pillow under your stomach. you peek over your shoulder to catch a glimpse of him. his chest covered in a sheen of sweat and his breathing hard . you reach a hand behind which he immediately intertwines with his own.
he leans down on top of you, his weight heavy and comforting as he slows down the pace of his thrusts. your hairās sticking to your face and your lipās parted with drool slipping out of the side of your mouth. he chuckles at your fucked out state and gives you a quick peck.
he shifts his weight onto his other hand as he moves your joint fingers under your stomach and picks you up so youāre hovering over the sheets. āclose sugu- ahā you moan as the angle has the head of his cock pressing against your g-spot. he kisses you deeply ā tangling tongues together. you lull your tongue out every so slightly and he takes it as his cue to suck on it.
your tongue between his lips as he bobs his head and his thrusts have you turning into a blubbering mess of hmphās and ohās.
āgo ahead and come for me, pretty girlā. he groans lowly in your ear. a rush of pleasure washes over you and you slump forward in his grip. he lets you lay back down on your stomach. he slows down his pace even more so you can ride out your high comfortably.
finally he pulls out and you turn around to lay on your back. his head falls back as he pumps his cock a few times and releases over your abdomen with a loud moan of your name.
kento nanami
you grow tired after hearing nanami complain several times about his recent grown out beard. āthey gave me a weird look,ā he huffs. ādo you think it makes me look weird?ā he asks you seriously.
āi think it looks sexy. but if you want i can make it lighter for you.ā you offer and he nods promptly.
so now youāre sitting on the bathroom counter with nanami between your legs and his arms placed on either side of you.
he hands you the trimmer with a shorter guard, allowing you to trim most of his beard but still maintain some facial hair. you turn on the trimmer and start from his ears and work your way down with a gentle but firm pressure. with unwavering focus, you move the trimmer under his nose, over the corners of his mouth and under his chin as the hair falls to the floor.
he keeps his eyes on you the entire time. the way you squint your eyes to focus better. the way your face muscles tense when you reach higher. your lips parting slightly when you move the trimmer under his nose. his heart fills with love at seeing you do this for him with so much care and attention.
you finish it off with a clean edge and pull away to grab a razor. you get back to work and apply a lather of shaving cream and remove any hair you couldnāt get with the trimmer. you pull back and admire your handy work, āhow does it look?ā you ask him with a sweet grin.
in return he kisses you. you squeal as the shaving cream covers your face. you both laugh as you help each other wash off the shaving cream.
you wipe your face and then his with a towel and he feels overwhelmed with the love he has for you. he wraps your legs around his waist and carries you back to bed.
he flops you down on the bed and wastes no time in ridding you off your clothes. he quickly moves between your legs and slides off your shorts. he sees the confusion on your face and grins āgotta reward my sweet doll for such a good job, donāt i?ā
he pulls your legs over his shoulders and gets to work. you gasp when you feel his freshly trimmed beard between your legs. he starts by tracing your outer labia with his tongue and moving to your inner labia. his tongue pokes under your clitoral hood and then presses over your clit.
your hole still untouched. he teases his tongue around it until he hears you whine ākento, pleaseā. he dips his tongue in and youāre almost instantly clenching around his tongue. āoh, sheās needy today,ā he speaks to your pussy in a hoarse tone.
he replaces his tongue by inserting two fingers into you. plunging in and out, curving slightly to push against that spot. his tongue moves over your clit in languid teasing licks, making you squirm and tighten your grip on his hair.
āstay still sweetheart,ā he tuts at you. having had enough of his teasing, you tighten your legs around his shoulders and pull his head further into your cunt.
with a grip on his hair, you start grinding against his face bringing yourself closer to your high. he removes his fingers from your cunt and dips his tongue once more. excited to have you clenching his tongue as you cum.
āahh ken, fuck iām so close,ā you mewl indirectly asking him to help you. his thumb alternates between rubbing circles and flicking your nub. soon you cum with a scream of his name. almost suffocating him between your legs, but he doesnāt mind.
he continues lapping at your cunt as you come down from your orgasm. you shudder as his tongue moves over your sensitive nub once more. he sucks your clit into his mouth, on a mission to make you cum again.
your hips grind against him involuntarily but this time he holds you down with a bruising grip. his head bobs as he continues sucking and lapping at your clit.
he holds your gaze as your expression changes to tethering the edge of overstimulation. his favorite view. his free hand moves over to your boobs ā massaging and teasing your nipples.
you grab his hand move it higher and up to your lips. he squeezes your cheek once and then youāre poking out your tongue and licking his palm. you hold his hand steady and suck in the two fingers that were in your cunt earlier.
you hum around his fingers and try to match the pace of his tongue on your clit. you look into his eyes, ignoring your gag reflex and push his fingers further into your mouth ā you decided to add a third finger.
nanami pulls away and bites your inner thigh as he grinds into the bed trying to get some relief. oh how he wishes you were sucking his cock instead. he plunges his tongue into your hole again and moans at the thought ā making your hole spasm around his tongue.
unable to contain himself, nanami, continues bucking his hips into the bed as you keep sucking his fingers greedily.
your second orgasm washes over you and you almost bite down on his fingers at the blissful pleasure. as if on cue he creams his pants and groans into your thigh.
ācanāt believe youāve made me cream my pants more than once,ā he chuckles from his place on your sprawled out thigh. he peppers kisses as he moves up your body, purposefully rubbing his freshly trimmed beard causing you to giggle sweetly. he grabs your face and gives you a bruising but loving kiss.
š¼ ā. šā. š¼ Ėļ½”š āš¼ ā. šā. š¼ Ėļ½”š āš¼ ā. šā. š¼ Ėļ½”š āš¼ ā. šā. š¼ Ėļ½”š āš¼ ā.
a/n: reblogs, likes, and comments are highly appreciated!
Ā© SONARSPACE 2023 | DO NOT COPY, TRANSLATE, OR REPOST MY WORK ON OTHER PLATFORMS!
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never ending night
bruce wayne x femwife!reader
word count: 1.7k | divider by @saradika | requests are open!
CW: pregnancy, pure fluff NOTES: hello hi iām ailĆs and iāve been meaning to start a blog where i can post some one shots that iāve been thinking of as a way to motivate myself to finally write down my ideas so this is it. iāll be double posting my stuff on ao3 (which you can find in my bio) and will eventually make a masterlist as well as a navigation post with a list of fandoms/characters i write for. also, english isnāt my first language.
It was close to three in the morning when Bruce finally joined you in bed after a long night of patrolling and fighting bottom of the barrel criminals all night. He showered in the bathroom on the first floor of the manor to avoid making too much noise and waking you up, but when he finally walked in your shared bedroom, you were already awake, sitting up against the headboard.
āDarling, what are you doing still up?ā Bruce asked you as he reached his side of the bed.
The room was dark par for the moonlight filtering through the gap between the curtains, meaning your husband had yet to notice the state you were in.
āDick had a nightmare,ā you answered, voice barely above a whisper due to how tired you were. āIt took me two hours to get him to fall back asleep and when I finally came back here, this little one started kickboxing me and keeping me awake for another hour,ā you continued rubbing your round belly in hopes of soothing your baby to finally catch some sleep.
āIām sorry I wasn't here to help,ā Bruce apologised, planting a kiss on your temple as he held you close to his body.
āItās alright, Gotham needs you,ā you dismissed, not at all angry.
āStill, youāre six months pregnant. Youāre growing our child inside your body, you need all the rest you can get,ā he softly argued. āI would've come home earlier but all the amateur criminals came out tonight.ā
āBruce, itās fine,ā you brought your hand up to his cheek and he leaned his head into your touch. ļæ½ļæ½ļæ½Youāve already been cutting your patrols shorter since we found out about the baby. As long as you keep coming back home to us, alive, then Iām not mad.ā
Not knowing what to say ā his gratefulness for having someone so accepting of his duty as Batman was almost overwhelming, even after all those years ā Bruce kissed your palm while staring at you with the same look full of love that he has been sporting since the first time he met you six years ago.
āHowād I get so lucky to fall in love with the most understanding and selfless person I know?ā He asked while grabbing your hand on his cheek, wrapping his fingers around yours and squeezing them gently.
āNow thatās a lie,ā you rebutted, a loving smile on your lips, lowering your joined hands on the bed. āYouāre more selfless than I am. Youāre the most selfless man in the world.ā
āLetās not start this never ending argument again,ā Bruce chuckled, now his turn to hold your face as he brought you in for a kiss.
You happily sighed against his lips, the feeling of home that overtook you every time you tasted them was a nice welcome in this interminable night. But the kiss was cut short as you felt your baby kick again and you let your head fall back as you groaned.
āSheās still kicking?ā Bruce asked you, he couldn't see the movements under your skin due to the darkness of the room and your hand on your belly.
āWe don't know it's a she,ā you reminded him instead of answering. You had both decided to wait until the birth to know the gender.
āAnd Iām telling you, I know it's a girl,ā your husband repeated for what could be the hundredth time.
You also secretly hoped it was a girl, but Dick really wanted a little brother. Bruce and you were still in the process of warming him up to the idea of a little sister and it was slowly starting to work.
āAs long as she doesn't come in my room,ā your eight year old son had said last week, with his arms crossed over his chest and a pout on his lips.
āI doubt sheāll be doing that for the first few years, chum,ā Bruce reassured him, fighting off a slightly amused grin.
āAnd the baby will have its own room with its own toys,ā you added.
āWill I still be able to play with the baby?ā Dick asked after a moment, uncrossing his arms and a hopeful look filling up his blue eyes.
āOf course you will, bubs,ā you said, your fingers threading through his black hair that fell over his forehead.
āBut only with her toys at first, some of yours are not suited for a baby,ā Bruce pointed out, ever the overprotective father.
Bruce had lowered himself down under the blanket so he could be laying head levelled with your belly, his hand now replacing yours over the bump.
āHey trouble,ā he whispered to your child and the baby kicked again, making him smile lovingly at the movement he felt under his hand. āYou shouldn't be awake this late at night, you know.ā
āYou're one to talk,ā you commented, tone almost reprimanding.
āShe doesn't know that,ā Bruce looked up at you as he defended himself before his gaze fell back on your belly. āMommy is really tired,ā he continued talking to your baby, his hand now rubbing soothingly over your round stomach, āand she needs her rest to do all the work so you can come out all healthy and beautiful. Well, you're definitely gonna be the most beautiful baby if you end up looking like your mother, but that's not the point.ā
You smiled at the cheesy comment and your fingers found their place in Bruceās hair, brushing through it and nails occasionally scratching his scalp.
āYour brother Dick can't wait for you to come around,ā he carried on. āSaid he will teach you all sorts of acrobatic tricks once you know how to walk. And he asked Alfred if he could help paint the nursery when we finally decide on a colour.ā
āAnd I keep telling you we should do soft green,ā you argued.
āIām not changing my mind from primrose pink,ā he told you with a sly grin.
āThe room wonāt be pink, even if itās a girl. And thatās final,ā you firmly said. Your husband will not be winning this one argument, no sir.
Bruce sighed, rolling his eyes before focusing back on your belly. āI hope youāre not as stubborn as your mother,ā he whispered to the baby, as if he was having a private conversation with them and that you werenāt there. āDonāt get me wrong, itās one of the many reasons why I fell in love with her, but I wonāt be able to say no to you even when I have to, so it would save me a lot of reprimanding from Mommy if youāre not as tenacious as her.ā
You smiled to yourself as you continued listening to your husband talk to your unborn child as you threaded your fingers through his hair, enjoying the softness it had after a shower. Bruce usually gelled his hair to appear more professional when he was working in the day, and then it would get all mixed up with his sweat under his cowl when he was working as Batman. When he would come back to you after the day was over, you would refuse to touch his hair until he had showered, the texture of the gel and sweat too gross on your fingers for you to ignore.
As Bruce continued talking to your baby, his voice started lulling the two of you to sleep. The baby hadnāt kicked in over almost ten minutes now, and the peace you had waited for so long to arrive made you aware of how heavy your eyelids were. You slowly lowered yourself down the bed, getting in a comfortable position with Bruceās help where you could finally lay your head on your pillow and it didnāt take long for sleep to catch up on you.
At the sound of your soft, barely audible snores, Bruce turned his head away from your bump to find you asleep with your free hand raised next to your head on your pillow, the other one still tangled in his hair.
He planted a soft kiss on the exposed skin of your belly, eyes closed as he took a moment to absorb the fact that a baby that was half you and half him would be joining your world in a little more than three months. Bruce wasn't known to cry, the only time you ever saw him cry was as you walked down the aisle at your wedding, but tonight, a lonesome tear rolled down his cheek and fell on your stomach, where your child was growing, because Bruce never believed he would ever get to experience again the amount of love he hadn't felt since he was eight years old.
As he observed you, sleeping soundly with his child coming to life inside you, after you comforted Dick back to sleep, Bruce, for a moment, felt overwhelmed by all the love in his life. When he became Batman, he crossed out the idea of ever having a family (other than Alfred), of settling down with someone he loved and who loved him back.
But somehow, the universe put you on his path, as a miracle or a guardian angel or simply as an anchor to life outside of Batman, he didn't know. You walked into his home, into his life, to remind him that he, Bruce Wayne, was also deserving of love, of family, of happiness. Then Dick came along, rather unexpectedly but still no less welcomed, and Bruce started entertaining the idea of having children with you. He definitely wasn't opposed to it, but it wasn't something he wanted to jump right into, especially with Dick having just entered your lives. You were both young, he in his early thirties and you in your late twenties, you could allow yourselves a couple of years just the three of you (four with Alfred) before expanding the family.
So it was rather shocking when two months after you and Bruce had officially adopted Dick that you found out you were pregnant. It both took you by surprise but after talking through it together, you couldn't be happier. And the two of you haven't stopped being happy about this new little addition ever since.
Bruce rose up from his position next to your belly, your limp hand fell from his head as he did so, and he laid on the bed next to you. He delicately kissed your forehead, then your nose before falling back on his pillow and whispered āI love youā as he curled around your body, his hand resting on your belly as he fell asleep.
#ailis writes#requests are open#bruce wayne x reader#bruce wayne#bruce wayne x fem!reader#bruce wayne x wife!reader#bruce wayne x you#batman#batman x reader#batman x fem!reader#batman x wife!reader#batman comics#christian bale batman#battinson#bruce wayne fic#bruce wayne imagine#bruce wayne x y/n#bruce wayne fanfiction#bruce wayne fluff#batman x y/n#batman imagine#batman fic#batman fanfiction#batman fluff#batmom#reader insert#x reader#fem reader
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Money, Money, Money! | sub!izuku midoriya
wc: 1.3k+ words | masterlist
dom!gn!reader, sub!pro-hero!izuku, sugar daddy x sugar baby relationship (reader is the sugar baby), degradation, bondage, financial domination, shoe humping, use of vibrator toys, gagging/choking, not really proof read
note: anon wanted the character to be changed to delu for context
AND GOD DAMN AM I PROUD OF THIS ONE
"Do you like it, baby?" izuku lifts his head up, his hazy, glassy eyes staring at the way the new outfit you just bought today looks on you. it looks incredible but he isn't able to voice that thought out, not when you've attached a ball choker around his head and in his mouth which prevents him from saying anything.
You smile when he nods eagerly, taking your sweet time to pose for him so he could see the entire outfit. Though you take longer than usual to do so, just so you could tease him.
You walk towards him, each loud step of your shoes on the floor making izuku's heart race at what going to happen next.
When you've reached him kneeling on the floor in front of the bed, you lick your lips at the delicious scene in front of you.
Drool is dripping down izuku's mouth as it drips onto his legs and even on his leaking cock. a vibrator toy sits attached to his hard dick, waiting to be turned on. his hands are tied behind is back and you dont even need to tie his legs apart, izuku is obedient enough to do that himself. His body is fully revealed to you and if you were to see him from behind, you would be able to see a vibrator toy in his ass too.
You coo at him. "look at you, already leaking like a whore when i haven't even touched you yet." Izuku whimpers but you see the way his dick twitches at your words, his face flushing a bright red. Heās been in this position for a hour now and his dick has been hard almost the entire time. everytime he moves, his dick bumps against his stomach and he can't help but let out a moan each time.
"what? don't lie, you really are a whore for me." You stand in front of him, looking down to stare at the hearts in his eyes. "after all, you let me do all sorts of stuff to you." You chuckle before remembering something.
"oh right! i almost forgot about the toys on you, let me just grab the remote it came with." You reach for the nearby remote before reading the instructions carefully. You just bought the toy today for him and you were eager to test it out, wanting to see all the reactions it would emit from izuku.
"they both came together so i assume they're connected somehow." You quickly scan the paper.
"it says here.. that if i press this button-" You press a button and izuku sudden jerks forward, his eyes widening and tears immediately prickling his eyes. He whines and shuts his eyes. You can hear the sound of vibrations and when you glance at the one attached to his dick, you see the way its vibrating.
Holy shit. You assumed it was going to work well since it costed quite a lot but you didnt know it would work this good. Izukuās face scrunches up and you realize you started the vibrations on high but you don't move to lower it.
A muffled gasp escapes from him as the toy in his ass immediately hits a spot in him that makes pre cum spurt out of his dick. You watch in amusement as izuku quickly falls apart at the feeling of being played with from both sides. He can't think properly on whether or not he focusses on the pleasure coming from his dick or his ass.
Drool escapes through the openings of the choker and he stares up at you with glassy eyes, pleading you to take it off. And so you do, you want to hear all the adorable noises he lets out obviously.
Though when you move towards him to do so, you purposely bump your leg against his dick, pressing it against his chest. Izuku lets out a cry at the friction.
Youāre then surprised to see cum shoot of his dick, staining his chest. You watch in shock and disbelief but izuku is quick to apologize now that the choker is off him.
"s-shit [name] ah!" Izuku whimpers when his dick immediately becomes hard again and he realizes you haven't turned off the vibrations. If anything, he feels you increase them, making him widen his eyes.
"wait! i-i didn't m-mean ngh to c-cum!" You narrow your eyes at him and you suddenly grab a fistful of his hair to yank his head back.
"but you did cum anyways, didn't you? without my permission too like a brat." Izuku hisses at the pain and shuts his eyes. He slowly nods, not wanting to disobey you.
He feels you let go of his hair and stare down at him with narrowed eyes. Youāre looking at him like heās some dirty plaything for you and while he is, fuck do you look hot doing it.
You feel some movement against your leg and you stare down, seeing his dick move against your leg. Izuku must be doing it subconsciously because when he follows your gaze, he gasps and stutters out another apology but you quickly cut him off.
"what, you want to hump my shoe or something? you want to be a dumb whore for me?"
Izuku bites his lip but he then nods eagerly and you let out a small laugh. Itās addicting, really. The feeling of having such power and control over someone who could easily overpower you. He could break out of the bondage right now but you know he won't. You know he wants to be a good boy for you.
You stick your foot out in front of his leaky dick, presenting your new fancy leather shoes that izuku assumes are really expensive.
Well he knows they were expensive actually, he bought them for you for you twos anniversary recently.
With almost no hesitation, Izuku begins grinding his dick against your shoe, groaning at the friction of the rough material against his sensitive member. He canāt help but lean forward to lay his cheek on your thigh and stare up at you as he falls apart from your shoe. You feel the way his dick vibrates from the toy attached.
āF-Fuck ah! Y-Your shoe feels s-so good, baby.ā You giggle and lean down to wipe the drool from the corner of his lips, making his eyes flutter.
Since heās still sensitive from his first orgasm, his second one quickly approaches and heās quick to warn you. He lets out a groan as he stares up with you with glassy eyes and you already know what heās asking for as his mind is probably too foggy to even ask or think properly.
You play with the remote in your hand before turning the toys to its highest setting, making Izuku let out a choked whimper.
āGo on, baby. Youāll be a good boy and cum for me right? You finally asked for permission this time.ā Izuku nods rapidly as his pace against your shoe speeds up even more. He suddenly lets out a cry as cum shoots out of his dick and stains your shoe along with your lower leg.
You feign a pout. "my shoe is all ruined now!" Though izuku doesnt seem to care, only continuing to rut again your shoe even though he just came for the second time. The pleasure must've gotten to his head, you think as you watch in amusement. You glance down and see as his cum drips down your shoe and onto the floor underneath.
You use a finger to tilt his head upwards towards you, a small grin on your face. "but you'll buy me a new pair right? you'll be a good boy and do that for me, wont you?"
Izuku stares up at you dumbly, hearts practically in his eyes. He nods eagerly.
"anything for you, [name]."
ty for reading to the end! ā¤ - chaepink
ā°āā¤ masterlist | rules
#chaepink.nsfw#dom!reader#sub!character#dom reader#dom fem reader#sub!mha#sub character#sub izuku#izuku x reader#midoriya izuku#izuku midoriya#sub midoriya#midoriya smut#midoriya x reader#sub bnha#bnha smut#bnha fanfiction#bnha x reader#bnha#mha x y/n#sub mha#mha x you#my hero acadamia x reader#my hero academia x reader#izuku mydoria#dom gn reader#fem dom reader#mha smut#mha x reader#mha fanfiction
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Guidance pt2
Agatha Harkness x Rio Vidal x Reader
Word Count: 2.7k
Notes: slight angst, abandonment issues, spoilers for Agatha All Along,, large time skip from part 1
Summary: Rio shows up at your home centuries after your last meeting, asking for your help to free Agatha from a spell. You're reluctant to help her as her presence reminds you of how she and Agatha abandoned you.
An: See... minutes later as promised. Hope you enjoy. Likes, comments, replies, and reblogs are much appreciated šāāļøšāāļøšāāļø
Part 1 | Masterlist
You sit up abruptly, your hands reaching to cradle your face. Your heart beats rambunctiously in your chest. The memory of Agatha and Rio haunts your dreams.
You can't stand how sweet it is. How fresh it feels even after centuries have passed. You swing your feet over the side of your bed deciding to abandon sleep completely.
Your feet pad against your wooden floor all the way to the kitchen. You turn the light on, and stop in your tracks as you notice a pizza on your counter.
You hadnāt ordered any pizza.
āLong time no see, sweetheart.ā
You didn't hesitate to shoot a ball of fire in the direction of that voice. The voice that whispered in your ear, the voice that praised you, the voice of one of your mentors.
āAw, didn't miss me?ā
You turn to face her, but sheās crafty. Her dagger is already pressed against your neck. You can feel her breathing in your ear. Her presence just as warm as you remembered.
āWhat do you want?ā
She puts a little pressure on the dagger, āWatch the tone, pumpkin.ā
You grew frustrated with her games. You threw your head back, head-butting the woman causing her to drop the dagger. You took the opportunity to pick it up. With her back on the floor, you straddle her waist and hold the dagger against her throat now. Tiny flames sparked in your pupils.
āWhy are you in my house, Rio?ā
The woman can't help herself, āI just missed being under you like this.ā
You glare at the woman, replacing the dagger with your hand around her neck, āI should put you out of your misery right now.ā
āKinky,ā she squeezes out.
āThis is the last time I'm asking, what do you want?ā
āA-Agatha.ā
You release your hand from her throat, āWhat about her?ā
Rio rubs a hand over her throat soothingly, āSheās gotten herself trapped in a spell of the Scarlet Witch.ā
āWhat does that have to do with me?ā
Rioās hands get comfortable resting on your hips. You think about shaking her hands off of you, but you don't.
āShe doesn't remember who she is. She thinks she's some woman named Agnes. I need your help to free her,ā this is the most serious she has been this encounter.
āYouāre literally Death. You don't need my help, you never did,ā you spoke pointedly.
Her hand begins to climb from your hips up and under your shirt. It wasnāt sexual, just intimate.
āThatās not true,ā she whispers, eyes locking on yours.
You scoff, but are unable to look away from her, āIt feels pretty accurate.ā
āI never stopped needing you,ā Rio admits.
Your gaze softens for a moment, āDonāt lie to me.ā
You get off of her, opting to lean against your kitchen counter. You needed to put distance between the two of you.
āY/n, Agatha needs us,ā Rio pleads with you.
āWhere were you when I needed you? Where was she?ā
Rio closes her eyes briefly, āWe took you in.ā
You furrow your brow in anger, āIs that all? You took me in, made me fall in love, and then you left me.ā
Rio shakes her head, āNo, you left us.ā
Your eyes burn at her words, āI would've never left you.ā
Rio shoots back, āIām pretty sure you did. You left us, Agatha and I got into a fight over whoās fault it was. It was the last time we spoke.ā
You shake your head, āNo, I went out to collect firewood. I got a little turned around on the way back, but eventually I made it . When I got home the two of you were gone. I waited and waited and you never came back.ā
āImpossible, we searched the whole forest looking for you before we started fighting,ā Rio argues back at you.
āBullshit,ā you say through gritted teeth.
āYou think weād just abandon you after everything,ā Rio sounds hurt by the accusation.
You want to comfort her, but you fight the urge, āI donāt think, I know because it happened.ā
āHelp me save Agatha, she will tell you the same,ā Rio wagers.
āFine,ā you relent.
Rio takes your hand in hers and soon you are no longer in your house. Youāre outside standing in front of a house youāve never seen before. Rio is dressed in what seems to be a bad detective get up. Youāre still in your pajamas.
āThis is Agathaās place,ā Rio says going up and ringing the doorbell.
When the door opens you see one of the most powerful witches that you know in a baseball tee and jeans. Her hair is in a ponytail and her demeanor is nothing as you remembered it to be.
āAgnes, I thought we could talk about the case some more,ā Rio says to the woman.
Agnesās eyes cut over to you, āAnd who is this sad sack?ā
āY/n here, is special forces. Sheās here to help us look beneath the surface. Isnāt that right, Y/n?ā
You nod silently, observing Agathaās state. She was always mischievous. Part of you hoped to see cracks of her shine through, but you couldnāt sense your Agatha underneath Agnes.
Agnes stepped aside to let you in.
You whisper to Rio, āWhatās wrong with her? I canāt- I donāt feel her.ā
āSheās trapped somewhere deep in her mind. Iāve tried to get her out, but Iām missing something,ā Rio says.
You watch as Rio interacts with Agnes. The magic of the Scarlet Witch seems tedious to undo. You stare deeply into Agnes, traveling down into her psyche, trying to find any piece of Agatha.
āDoes she just sit there and stare?ā
āItās part of her process,ā Rio deflects.
Agnes leans forward to match your stare, āLook any harder and you might find yourself a carrot, bunny.ā
You startle, at the old nickname.
āExcuse me?ā You say and you see a far away look in the womanās eyes. She shakes her head.
āNothing, sorry about that. This case, itās got my head all scrambled,ā she says to herself.
You try to transport yourself back into your coven days. Head always buried in a spell book of some sort. You shift through the knowledge, hoping to find something that sticks.
Your eyes shut as words begin to fill your head. Latin words that you don't quite know anymore. They feel right so you begin to chant them under your breath.
āWhat is she saying?ā You hear Agnes question.
āNothing important, let's get back to the photos.ā
Agnes shakes her head, āShe's speaking gibberish, I think she's unstable. Mam, mam I'm going to need you to stop.ā
Agnes gets in your face. Her hands shake your shoulders, but you just begin chanting louder. Your eyes begin to glow white as you look into her.
āSheās possessed, dear god,ā Agnes tries to pull her hands off of you, but you keep them there.
āAgatha,ā her name falls gently from your lips. āYouāve been lost, but Iāve found you.ā
You can feel her. The witch underneath this costume. You reach for her in your mind. The layers begin to peel back and Rio watches as the character falls off of Agatha.
Itās like theyāre traveling through the decades. The room seems to be shaking, as if there was an earthquake. Until finally thereās nothing left but Agatha.
Her eyes are wide open as she sits in front of you bare. Your hands still holding hers onto your shoulders.
āY/n?ā The disbelief in her tone lets you know that this is your Agatha.
Her eyes dart over to Rio, a scowl grows on her face.
āHello, my love,ā Rio winks at the naked woman.
Agatha lunges at Rio, but you pull her back into your grasp.
āI donāt care if you guys fight each other, but I need to know this first. Rio tells me that I left the two of you, but I remember you leaving me.ā
Agatha looks at you with a crease in her brow, āWe would've never left you, bunny.ā
āTold you so,ā Rio says.
You shake your head, āI don't understand.ā
Agatha holds your face in her hands and you let her. Her thumb swipes across your cheek tenderly.
āBunny, we searched for you, for hours. We couldnāt find you, we couldnāt feel you. Even when I went to look for you after our fight, I couldnāt feel you. I could never trace your magic,ā Agathaās voice falters towards the end.
āHow did you find me?ā You question Rio.
āThe old fashioned way, sweetheart. I looked you up.ā Rio gets closer to you and Agatha. āI couldnāt feel your magic either."
āI still donāt understand. I went home that day, neither of you showed up. I wasnāt gone for that long. I just got a little turned around,ā you mumble to yourself more than them.
āWhat do you remember?ā Agathaās finger trails up, tapping on your head.
āI went to get firewood, I was walking.ā
Agatha responds, āDo you remember for how long?ā
āIt felt like less than an hour,ā you try to pull the memory forward.
Rio hums, āWhen did you get turned around?ā
āI don't know.ā
āYes, you do. Find it,ā Agatha pushes you.
A sensation stirs in you, almost feeling like youāre being buried alive, āI canāt.ā
Rioās kneeling down beside the two of you. Her eyes focus on you, āYou can, Y/n.ā
That feeling starts to intensify. You can feel dirt falling over your body. Itās suffocating you. You try to push Agatha off of you, but she stays in place. Rio has her hand on your knee trying to provide you with comfort.
Thereās an intense flash of white light. All of a sudden youāre in the forest again. The soil is cold underneath your feet, and the night breeze tries to get into your cloak. Rio's cloak, why were you wearing her cloak?
āWhere are we?ā
You didn't expect to see Agatha and Rio at your side. Agatha now fully clothed, but her clothes were outdated. You all were wearing wardrobes of centuries past.
āI don't know,ā you say, casting a fire ball in your hand.
āWell wherever we are I still don't have any magic,ā Agatha grumbles.
āWhy is this so familiar?ā Rio reaches out to touch the trees.
Your eyes land on a cabin, one that was very familiar to you, āItās home.ā
They look at the cabin for a long minute.
āIt is not,ā Agatha says eyes narrowing.
āWhat do you mean?ā
Agatha gets closer to the wooden structure. She pushes the door and it opens. Inside is the place you remember waiting for them for. Youāre sure of it, that this is the home.
āAgathaās right, close but no,ā Rioās eyes wander around the room.
āThis is it,ā you say firmly.
They both look at you. Rio speaks first, āThis plant, itās the wrong color and in the wrong place.ā
āThe blanket on the chair, the stitching is wrong,ā Agatha feels it in her hand.
The details are small, but incorrect all the same. Your confusion only multiplies at the realization.
āBut, I waited here,ā you repeat it a few times, feeling like your breath was stolen from your lungs.
They are by your side in an instant. Agatha has her arms wrapped securely around you.
āWeāre going to figure it out, bunny,ā Agatha speaks to you, but her eyes are on Rioās hoping that she could explain this.
āI think, we might be in a different dimension ,ā Rio says.
āHow would we be in a different dimension?ā Your frustration bleeds through your words.
āYour power,ā Agatha says as though she has connected all the dots.
Rio nods along, āYouāve crossed a dimensional barrier.ā
āHow?ā You still were in disbelief.
Rio shrugs, āI donāt know, but Iām certain this is not our Earth. There are souls here that I know I have reaped.ā
Agatha looks at Rio for clarification, ā A green witch can travel planes?ā
Rio tilts her head from side to side, āSort of, but not exactly. Most of them can travel through the soil. Itās more state to state, or maybe even out of the country, but this isā¦ unheard of.ā
āYou said most,ā you stop her.
She smirks, āWell, Iām Death; The Green Witch, I am able to travel the planes of the multiverse.ā
āThis would explain why we couldnāt feel you."
The realization hits you like a bullet to the chest. They didnāt leave you, you werenāt abandoned. The only reason you arenāt together is because they physically couldnāt get to you.
āTake us back,ā your voice was delicate.
Rio obliged, putting the 3 of you back at Agathaās house.
The moment youāre back youāre apologizing to the women, āIām sorry. I thought you left, and didnāt want me. I spent all this time, hating you for leaving me, but you never did. I shouldnāt have believed that you would. Iām sorry it broke you guys up. Iām sorry that-ā
Rio doesnāt let you continue. Her lips smash against yours hungrily. Thereās nothing careful or patient about the kiss. It's as if you are her sustenance in that moment. She was unwilling to part even as your lungs screamed for oxygen. You questioned if you really needed it as much as you needed her lips on yours.
Rio only relents when she realizes that you were running out of air. She pecks your lips once more before letting you catch your breath.
Agatha goes to make a snarky remark that dies on her lips as Rio grabs her face. Rio rests her forehead against Agathaās just breathing in the womanās air. Sheās waiting for something, Agathaās permission.
You watch as Agatha scans the other womanās face, potentially trying to remember all of the details. She nods ever so slightly and Rio doesnāt waste another second.
Your pupils dilate at the image before you. The hunger, the longing, the love you can see it all as they mix into each other.
āDo not be sorry, itās no oneās fault,ā Rio speaks as her lips leave Agathaās.
āBut-ā
āCome here bunny,ā Agatha turns from Rio to give you her attention.
You follow her instructions and shuffle over to her. Your eyes canāt help to dart to her lips. You wonder if you could taste Rioās lips by kissing her.
āItās nobodyās fault,ā Agatha takes a hand and runs it through your hair.
You sigh, āWeāve spent so much time apart because of me.ā
āWeāre together now and thatās all that matters,ā Agatha counters.
āYour magic,ā your fingers intertwine with hers.
āIāll get it ba-ā
This time itās you that cuts her off. Her lips are softer than you remember, and there is a faint earthy presence in her kiss. You take the opportunity to shoot some of your magic into her hands.
Instinctively she begins to absorb the power. It hurts you a little, but youāre too focused on the feeling of her tongue against your bottom lip. You open for her like you always have.
She moans into your mouth. You push further into her, weak as your magic slipped through your fingers.
You donāt want to stop kissing her, but if she takes anymore of your power, youāll die. You want to push the boundary, but Rio doesnāt let you. She pulls you out of Agathaās grasp severing the line between her power and yours.
āThat was so reckless,ā Agatha scolds you. āYou couldāve died.ā
You shrug, āYou wouldnāt have taken it from me if I offered.ā
Agatha scoffs, āBecause itās dangerous ā
āIām fine, Rio interfered so everything is fine,ā you brush her off.
āI would say stop fighting, but I kind of like when you two argue,ā Rio smirks.
You smile at her, āI feel like thatās my line.ā
āPut me back under the spell, now,ā Agatha pretends to be annoyed.
āYou love it,ā Rio pulls Agatha into a hug.
Agatha tugs you into the both of them.
āI donāt, but I love you.ā
For the first time in centuries, you felt yourself breathe a little easier. It was surprising how quickly you all picked up where you left off. The bad blood trickled down into playful teasing. It was as if the universe was just better when you were with Agatha and Rio.
#lowkeyerror#agatha x reader#agatha harkness x reader#agatha harkness#agatha harkness x rio vidal#rio vidal#rio vidal x reader#agatha harkness x rio vidal x reader
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INSECURITIES THEY FIND ATTRACTIVE
notes: lmao I was bored, NOT proofread so ik itās kinda wonky lmao
wc: about 200 each
warnings: cursing
!! all of these āinsecuritiesā are beautiful and unique! Iām just using some common insecurities, just bc they are listed doesnāt mean you should be insecure! You are perfect they way you are <3 !!
SMALL BOOBS
He loves your boobs. They are just so cute! He doesnāt care about the size of them, besideās smaller the chest, bigger the heart! He thinks theyāre just the right size, he can perfectly hold them so thatās a plus! Heāll still take a nap on them, boobs are boobs, no matter the size.
NAGI, RIN, OTOYA, sendou, chigiri, ness, niko, reo
STRETCH MARKS
Pls he thinks itās the most sexy thing ever. Heāll trace the lines up and down with his index finger, telling you how cool your marks are. It truly baffles him that you donāt like your stretch marks.Ā Ā He thinks they make you look badass, like a lightning scar.Ā
SHIDOU, BACHIRA, OLIVER, KARASU, REO, yukimiya, barou
THICK THIGHS
The gravitational pull couldnāt keep him away from your thighs. His head nuzzled into the soft flesh, while his hands rub and squish them. After a long day, or really whenever he feels like it, heāll plop his head down on your thighs and falls right asleep.Ā
ISAGI, RIN, NESS, reo, nagi, otoya, barou
Bunny/buck teeth
Omg he literally cannot function- heāll just stare at your mouth while you talk with a big olā grin on. He just thinks itās so cute! Or whenever youāre concentrating and your teeth poke out, he think his heart just might burst. If he ever catches you talking down about yourself heāll just have to show you how much he loves them with a kiss.
BACHIRA, KURONA, NESS, YUKIMIYA, charles,Ā
PUDGE
Pls he literally thinks it the best. Youāre just so soft and squishy! Youāre his personal teddy bear! His favorite part of you is your tummy. The butterflies he gets from looking at is it is crazy. He loves resting his head on your tummy while your pet his head. He loves it when you were tighter clothing so he can see your cute little pudge.Ā
REO, SENDOU, SHIDOU, KURONA, bachira, nagi, barou, ness
BEING SKINNY
He thinks itās so funny how loose his clothes fit on you. He thinks your body is so pretty and delicate. he likes hold slender hands and kiss them. He loves the feeling of holding your hands in his. He goes around smuggly telling people heās dating a supermodel.Ā Itās not good to lie buuut, you totally could be a model š¤
CHIGIRI, KAISER, hiori, otoya, rin, sae, ness
THIN THIGHS
He thinks they are just the perfect! He thinks itās cute how big his pants are on you, since his thighs are humongous. He likes to have you sit on the bed while he sits on the floor between your thighs. His cheek will be squished against you, as you combs through his hair. Itās one of his favorite things.Ā
ISAGI, CHIGIRI, OTOYA, SENDOU, kurona, hiori, karasu, ness, kaiser, saeĀ
MUSCLES
ā¦he really wants to be dominated by you. Like manhandle, please, he is practically begging you. He thinks your muscles are so fucking hot. Seriously, he thinks itās the sexiest thing about you, it makes him feel all sweaty and nervous watching you flex your muscles.
KARASU, HIORI, SHIDOU, NESS,Ā reo,Ā
FRECKLES / BEAUTY MARKS
You cannot and will not stop him from kissing every mole you have. He thinks they make you unique, he loves connecting each birth mark to one another like constellations. Heāll give your āconstellationsā dumb names too and create a whole story for them. He loves kissing all of your freckles<3
OLIVER, KURONA, BACHIRA, NESS, SHIDOU, isagi, barou, karasu, (sae too but less cute cus yk, itās sae)
pls reblog/comment! Luv to hear what yāall think! And remember you are a sexy and gorgeous, donāt forget pooks<3
Made April 18th 2024
#merlucide#blue lock#blue lock x reader#bllk x reader#bllk#blue lock x you#isagi x reader#chigiri x reader#bachira x reader#kurona x reader#hiori x reader#karasu x reader#otoya x reader#shidou x reader#charles chevalier x reader#Bllk charles x reader#reo x reader#nagi x reader#kaiser x reader#ness x reader#barou x reader#sae x reader#oliver aiku x reader#sendou x reader
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Alastor x Reader - Chest Fluff
Details: Established relationship, honeymoon phase, light teasing. You discover Alastor's chest fluff! Warnings: None, this is pure fluff - literally. No pronouns used. No use of Y/N. Not beta read as usual. Author's note: Iām fully convinced Alastor has chest fluff. I donāt have any proof except I think itās CUTE. Word Count: 992
Youāve always loved cuddling Alastor. Itās the closest form of intimacy you had gotten so far in your budding relationship. And he was so, so comfortable.
Looking at him, youād think he was all sharp edges and pointy teeth, but lying on his chest, as you were right now, you could swear this man was secretly a pillow.
Both of you were lying on a chaise longue in his room, soft jazz playing in the background. While he was busy reading over some papers, heād allowed you to indulge in some cuddles, so long as you didnāt disturb him.
But you just couldnāt help yourself. You nuzzled your face into his shirt, his overcoat discarded on an armchair, and sighed.
āYouāre so soft, Al.ā
He peeked at you from behind his papers, a lazy grin on his face, and raised a brow at you in question.
āIām serious, itās like youāre a plushie. Or maybe youāre actually an alpaca demon instead of a deer. Itās as if youāre all fluffy or something.ā
Alastor let out an amused laugh.
āHa! Maybe itās because I am.ā
You raised your head to look at him. Now itās your turn to cock an eyebrow at him.
āWhat? An alpaca demon?ā Another laugh escaped him.
āGoodness, no! Thatās a stupid notion, my dear.ā He let his papers fall to the floor and gave you an amused smirk.
āItās winter, darling. Not only do I have to deal with shedding my antlers, I also happen to grow a bit of a thicker coat of fur.ā
His brows furrowed a bit in annoyance as he told you of his situation. He was obviously displeased by it, but by god, if you werenāt intrigued. You made a mental note to squeal about how openly he talked about it with you later. But for now, you needed answers.
Your gaze shifted down to his chest, now noticing that it did seem a bit fuller than it used to.
āCan I see it?ā - āI beg your pardon?ā
Your eyes widened at your impulsive request, as did his. Only now did you realize that that would include him dropping a layer. Youāve never seen one another in a state of undress, except perhaps in your night clothes. And even then you had both always been fully dressed.
But you made your bed, now you had to lie in it.
āU-uhm, I meanā¦I kindaā¦wanna see it..?ā You stammered. You could feel your face heating up under his gaze, while his grin only grew wider. You were sure he was enjoying how flustered you were getting.
āWell, since you asked so nicely! Only because itās you.ā A dark glint flashed in his eyes as he said it. He then nodded to his shirt, challenging you to undo the buttons. āGo on, darling. Donāt be shy now.ā
You sat up in his lap, head reeling and ears buzzing as if all your blood had risen to your face. You couldnāt believe you were doing this. Your shaking fingers undid his bowtie first, neatly folding it and placing it on the back of the chaise. Then you reached for the first set up buttons, so close to his neck. You could swear you heard a soft chuckle as you undid them.
Your eyes flit up at him for a second, before quickly snapping back down as you caught him watching you intensely with narrowed eyes and his wicked grin.
āStop looking at me while I do thisā¦āĀ
āNo~.ā Alastor teased.
If you could bush any further, you would.
You decided it was enough after three more sets of buttons. Now no longer focused on the task at hand, you spotted what looked like fur peeking from the gap in the shirt.
Without thinking, you spread his shirt open, even startling Alastor with your bold move. Eyes wide, you gazed at what you could only describe as soft looking brown fluff right in the middle of his chest.
If you had looked up, youād see Alastorās smile twitching. Now he was the one being stared at so thoroughly, and it unnerved him. He suddenly feltā¦exposed? Insecure, maybe? No, not him, never!
He stiffened up as he felt your fingers slowly moving through the tufts of fur, essentially stroking his bare chest.
The fur was dense and soft. Certainly made to keep him warm during the cold seasons - and possibly to serve as a pillow for yourself.
You thought it was so cute. It didnāt go at all with his reputation as the big bad Radio Demon, so itās no wonder he keeps it a secret. A secret only you knew now.
āWow, itās really soft, Al! No wonder youāre so comfy all the time.ā When you looked back up at him, you could see the faintest of blushes along his cheeks. You were sure your own blush was still there as well, but you felt reassured knowing that he was also affected by your intimate position.
You batted your eyelashes at him in an attempt to butter him up some more. He probably knew what you wanted to do next anyway.
āCan I..?ā
He let out a theatrical sigh, but opened his arms to welcome you in.
āFine. Since youāre being oh so sweet, my dear.ā
You hummed in satisfaction and slowly laid your head down into his chest fluff. It smelled so much like him. You could hear his heart beating much faster than it had before and you grinned to yourself.
You let out another hum as you felt his arms come to rest on your back, his chest rumbling as he spoke.
āI hope you understand that this is to stay between us, darling?ā
āMhm~.ā You agreed as you closed your eyes. Thereās no way you would ever share this knowledge with anybody. This was just one of the many little secrets Alastor carried with himself. And this one was only for you to know.
#alastor x reader#alastor#hazbin hotel x reader#alastor hazbin hotel#alastor hazbin hotel x reader#hazbin hotel#my writing#I'm obsessed with his chest fluff help
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ā® tags. (18+), fem!reader, bf!geto, established relationship, domesticity and fluff, reverse comfort if you squint, cockwarming, petnames (baby).
ā® wc. 1.5K
ā® notes. guys...I swear I didn't mean to do this smut, I swear this was going to be fluff,,
"Hey."
Suguru calls out to you from the door of the shared room, his shoes absent, his white shirt unbuttoned āhis chest exposed to your eyes, very few scars, the one or two moles and a marked abdomen, along with a path of curly, dark hairs ending where his pants beginā as he carries his uniform jacket on his forearm.
Your eyes filled with life, you've been waiting for him all day.
"Come here," you call him softly towards the bed patting the mattress, setting the cursed techniques book aside to focus on him.
Suguru shuffles his steps across the floor of the room, his shoulders are slightly down, his hair as he approaches you can see it getting more and more disheveled, loose strands sticking out from every corner of the perfect bun that once existed.
"What happened?" You question him, Suguru was at that point crawling his body to the mattress like a worm. His face remains just above your bare thighs as he looks up at you from below with eyes full of love, your fingers comb a lock back behind his ear. "I only missed one day and this is your state, huh? You missed me that much?"
Suguru rolls his eyes, then closes them, letting himself be dragged down by the weight of exhaustion. His long arms wrap around your waist and you lie like that for a while, so silent you think he's fallen asleep until his raspy voice shakes you, taking you by surprise.
"I'm tired."
"You want to talk about your day?"
Another grunt. "It's just that being a teacher is harder than I thought."
"This is only your second week." You speak in the same sleepy tone as he does, almost as if you're seeking not to wake him up.
"Satoru makes it look so easy," he says, still with his eyes closed.
"You know this is fun for him. He doesn't take it as seriously as you do." You try to comfort him, still massaging his skull.
You get a glint from his brown eyes as he opens one eye for you, squeezing the other.
"Baby."
"Hm?"
"I'm getting hard." You stop yourself from stroking him all at once, he moans. "Don't stop. I'm sorry."
"I thought you were tired." You were confusedā¦ this wasn't unusual but still, you couldn't help but frown somewhat incredulously.
"And I amā¦ but I'm so stressed lately, I'm late from killing curses and you're not here, I get up early and you're not in bed and, ugh."
"Hm?" you insist.
"I've been thinking about you all day," Suguru sighs.
You swallow, nervous because you know where this road leads āyou've lived it a hundred times alreadyā your caresses become a little unsteady in his hair and Suguru notices, drawing a smile in his unconscious. Your skin feels very sensitive to his touch, his warm fingers hugging your skin where the pajama top can't cover.
"What have you been thinking?" you venture to ask.
"You know exactly what I've been thinking," he murmurs, scrunching his face against the warm flesh of your thighs. "About you, about your hugs, about your mouth, about your kisses, about your hands on meā¦"
Suguru opens his eyes wide, smiling without showing his teeth and your heart, never able to have adjusted to his effect, leaps. He leaves the comfort of your lap to get up, Suguru throws his shirt on the floor and settles on the bed to wrap his arms around you from behind, you arrange your body so that the two of you form a perfect arc.
You knew what that position meant, but as if Suguru thought you were in doubt, he adds, "Let's get some sleep."
Are you sure?" It was six o'clock in the evening, sleep now meant waking up like wide-eyed owls in the wee hours of the morning. It meant making coffee to keep you awake until you had to go to work again because there was no way you could fall asleep again.
"Just a little bit," he says, not mentally reasoning the same points you are. You let it go because he really feels exhausted and you know what it means to him in that state to have your him keep you close.
Suguru settles in better behind you, his strong arms holding you close to his body, impossible to escape even if you wanted to. His face is hidden in your neck and the warmth of your boyfriend after so many days of being away feels good, his hands are on your tummy making circles that lead you to close your eyes.
Suguru moves closer to you, and though his breath on your skin makes you want everything more than sleep you try for at least a couple of long minutes, until you feel his arms stir like snakes in your body and move up to your breasts and squeeze. You lie still, wondering if he did it out of inertia until he does it a second time.
You groan, inevitably pushing into him, bumping into an erection that digs hard against your ass.
His calloused fingers search for your nipples on the fabric finding them instantly hard. Suguru sighs deep in your throat, squeezing your body a little tighter, the tips of his pearly teeth grazing your flesh.
"I thought you were sleepyā¦" you moan, throwing your head back, giving him the space he needs to suck on your skin.
"Shh," he shushes you with another insensitive squeeze to your nipples, Suguru didn't used to be so rough, but his actions only hid behind the desire when he missed you.
His fingers enter through your top and fiddle with your nipples, playing with them back and forth. You both continue the game for a while longer, him squeezing and tugging at them, you rubbing against his hard cock directly ruining your pajamas thanks to the non-existence of your panties.
"Put it in," you barble full of ecstasy, you feel him grinning near your collarbone.
"Already?"
"Yes, hurry."
"Are you wet?" he doesn't let you answer as he keeps talkingā "Let me seeā¦ No panties," suguru emphasizes. Without asking permission, he reaches through the elastic of your shorts and positions himself with his middle finger between the soggy folds of your pussy. He rubs your clit, you blindly reach for his erection in an awkward position where you throw your arm back but he stops it; ceasing to knead your breasts to make it prisoner against your back.
You moan, wanting to touch him too, but all prayer is half-hearted the moment his hooked fingers expand your pussy. Suguru is fucking it with his digits, you are obscenely wet, you soak him to the knuckles, staining your own thighs in the process and the room fills with the sticky 'click click click' sounds along with the chorus of needy moans.
Suguru kisses your wet temple.
"I missed you," he admits, increasing the rhythm, his wrist beginning to cramp.
"I missed you more! Suguru.. stop, I don't want to-!"
You try to stop him by pushing his hand away from you but this doesn't help much.
"Condom," he says through gritted teeth.
"We don't haveā¦" you hate yourself at that moment for forgetting to buy but he hates himself more.
Reluctantly Suguru pulls his fingers out of you.
"Fuck it," Suguru growls. You hear him unzip and pull down his uniform pants, just enough to pull his cock out. "Let me fuck you like thisā¦" he asks, taking your cheek and pulling it apart, exposing your ass and pussy from behind, Suguru spits on his hand and fucks the swollen tip of his cock for a while, just watching you dripping and squeezing around nothing. "I'm gonna pull out.." Suguru promises falsely.
"Hm," you nod looking back spreading your legs wider for him.
You feel him at your entrance, rubbing all over your wet slit with his even wetter head. Suguru taps your sensitive clit with his stiff cock and slides in one shot inside you before you have time to beg him.
You can feel him trembling and it's desperate. He doesn't move and you want to scream.
"Babyā¦" you call out to him, looking back up at him and he tastes the desperation in your broken voice.
"Let's sleep like this." Suguru wraps his arms around your waist again to the same innocent position as before, only now you can feel it throb and fill you to a point where you can't breathe.
"Babeā¦" you call out to him again, this time he spanks you lightly.
"Don't move, you're going to make me cum."
"Suguruā¦" You whimper a third time and he mischievously gives a deep thrust of his hips.
"Stay still. Let me feel you." He returns to his original spot, massaging your breasts and tugging on your nipples, you moan.
"I love you," you sob, trying to distract yourself from the fact that you needed to stimulate your clit, that it was throbbing and that you clearly weren't going to be able to sleep.
For a brief flash you imagine if you could make yourself cum silently.
#wr#wr.geto#geto x reader#geto x you#geto suguru x reader#geto suguru x you#geto suguru smut#geto smut
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Rafe having caught his dads maid stealing
He gives her two options :a) he can tell ward or b) he can f ck her unprotected whenever he wishes
Iām gonna have fun with this! >:)
A/N: I love sleazy frat boy rafe :D
TW: SMUT! Power Dynamics! Degradation! Blackmail! Breeding Kink! Manipulation?? Classist Idealogy! Curtain bangs Rafeyyyyy
Pairing: Rafe Cameron x Maid!Reader
-
āWell, well would ya look at this. I could take you for a desperate whore, but I didnāt take you for a desperate little thief.ā Mocked Rafe, watching as the little housemaid his father hired looked at him with wide eyes. The diamond tennis bracelet Ward bought for Rose that he hid in his office just about to slip into her bra. Heās so fucking glad he decided to snoop on the little kitten thatās been slinking around his home, tidying up in the skimpiest outfits with her ass always showing and tits always ready to burst out. Leaving her sweet perfume scent in every corner and invading his senses every time he passes through. Safe to say sheās been the picture he fucks his hand to almost every night, imagining her laid out in his sheets or bent over Wardās desk as he pounds into her hole and breaks it in for his cock. Heās definitely taking the opportunity to make that happen, her falling right into the palm of his hand.
Rafe watches as her pretty eyes fill with tears, her long faux lashes making them look so damn erotic. He wants to see her cry; he wants to make her cry. Not because heās caught her steal but heāll revel in the little opportunity anyway. āRaf-Mr. Cameron please,ā she begged, the expensive bracelet gripped in her hand before she sets it gently down on the wooden desk. āIām-māso sorry please donāt tell your father.ā She cries to him, tears now running down her cheeks and ruining her dewey makeup as Rafeās gaze cuts into her. His eyes darkening at her pathetic display, heās gonna have a load of fun with this.
He stalks from the door entrance around Wardās desk to her slowly. Like a predator who knows heās about to catch his prey, ready to devour her whole as she shrinks under his intimidating gaze. Sick smirk displayed on his handsome face as he stops in front of her. She bends her head down as tears fall from her eyes onto the floor. Sheās so fucked, she knows it. She just couldnāt help herself! It was so pretty! Sheād never be able to afford it on her salary and someone like Rose didnāt deserve to have such a nice piece of jewelry. She envies their lifestyle, every time she comes to work all she can think about is what sheād do just to have a taste of this life. Itās everything compared to her nothing of a shack back on the Cut.
Rafe grabs her by the jaw, forcing her face to look back into his as he lowly tells her, ālook at me.ā He watches as her scared eyes look into his, worry and anxiety swirling around them and her long lashes now clumped with tears. She whimpers under his grasp and gaze, her hands coming to fist in his polo as he smirks down at her. She can see the lust displayed in his eyes; she can see the way he wants to devour her whole. Rafe is the prettiest boy sheās ever seen, no doubt about it. Heās only a couple years older than her and sometimes when sheās in bed laying awake at night she slips a hand between her legs with him in mind. āShh, donāt cry,ā he whispers lowly, squeezing her cheeks to squish her perfect lips. The glittery gloss she had slathered on them making her pout look so enticing he wants to kiss her and shove his cock down her throat all the same.
āWhatās the matter, huh? Donāt like being caught? Donāt like me knowing what a dirty little thief you are?ā He mocks, the whimper she let out as she began to shake her head side to side making his cock throb painful in his khaki shorts. āNo? Youāre really trying to lie to me right now? Right after I caught you trying to sneak that very expensive bracelet into your bra like some easy bought whore? You must think Iām fucking stupid, baby. But fuck- if ya aināt so goddamn beautiful.ā He drawled the last part, squeezing her cheeks together even harder and watching as drool began to leave her lips and drip down her chin. What he does next makes the heat building inbetween legs almost intolerable.
Rafe brings his tongue out, licking the drool that dripped down her chin with the tip of it all the way to her lips. Pressing a soft kiss after and smirking when she whines and flutters her eyes, manicured hands fisting tighter in his shirt as she leans her body into him. He chuckles before telling her what he has planned. āHereās whatās gonna happen. I either tell my dad that our sexy little maid has been stealing from him, because god knows this isnāt the first time.ā She whines louder at that, pushing her fist into his abdomen and she begins trying to plead. Her whining incessant and making Rafe remove his grip on her face to smack her cheek slightly. āHey! Ssh! Listen to me or else you wonāt like what happens.ā He threatened her, voice low and nasally as his large frame towers over her. She subdues and submits, one more sad whimper falling from her lips as her eyes show her submission. His grip returning to her cheeks.
āAtta girl, thatās what I like to see. Already such a girl good fāme.ā He rewards her with a soft, yet longer peck to her lips as her eyes flutter close from his touch. This is all sheās ever wanted and even if the way sheās getting it scares her to no end about the future of her stability she falls into the dark hole that is Rafe Cameron all too willingly. He pulls back, eyes having stared at her the whole time. Satisfaction settling deep in his chest at her willingness to submit to him. Heās most definitely using it to his advantage. Heād be an idiot not to, sheās everything he wants and heās gonna have her one way or another. āYour second option is letting me fuck that little cunt, however I want. Wherever I want. Anytime I want it. I wonāt tell my dad and youāll get some good orgasms out of it. Whaddya say?ā But he already knew the answer, he could see the resolve settling deep in her eyes. Her head nodding immediately as she leans forward to hopefully capture his lips with hers. All he wants to do is fuck her and she gets to keep her job? Itās a win-win in her mind, making money while fucking the finest boy on the island.
Rafe chuckles at her eagerness, holding her in place with the grip on her face as he shakes his head mockingly and tuts at her. Little did she know he didnāt want to just fuck her, he wants to fill her up over and over again till that little tummy swells with him. He wants to own her, keep her under his thumb. He knows what she wants, she wants everything he can provide for her and heās more than willing to do it. Someone as precious as her doesnāt deserve living on the Cut āno. She deserves to be showered in luxury and decked out in the crĆØme de la crĆØme. Heāll give everything to her, the one exception heās willing to make when it comes to a Pogue. Heās gonna make her the sexiest little Kook, ācause regardless of where she comes from he knows she got it deep in her blood.
āOne more thing,ā he small smirk turning into a wide, sick smile as he holds her gaze. She hangs onto every word heās saying, waiting for him to continue. āYouāre gonna let me fuck you raw. Wanna feel every inch of that tight little cunt and māgonna fill you up so much it sticks. You got that?ā His words leave her stunned, sheās not on birth control and she stuck on the way he said he wants to make it āstick.ā He canāt possibly mean? I mean.. what other way could she ensure that all this luxury ends up in her lap. Itās the perfect opportunity to milk him for all heās worth and sheād be stupid to waste it. She nods her head as much as she can in his grasp, Rafeās satisfaction morphing into triumph. Her knew her little gold-digging ass wouldnāt waste the opportunity heās giving her. Heās gonna make good use of her compliance thatās for sure.
He chuckles at her and smacks her cheek once more, grabbing her and pulling her face to his as her dominates her mouth with his and shoves his tongue down her throat. Pulling back after a minute or so as a string of their mixed saliva stretched erotically between their lips. āMhm, thatās what I thought.ā He says with complete confidence, letting her face go and moving his hands to grip her pert ass in her small little spandex shorts. He smacks her ass harshly with one hand, burying his face in her throat as she leans her head back and allows him to press rough kisses to her skin while her hands fisted in his shirt release and reach around his back to pull him in closer. Moaning while he gropes her and licks a long strip up her neck, then chin to her lips smothering them with his own once more. He pulls backs then turns them around quickly, him now in her previous place as her turns her back to face him and shoves her forward. Smacking her ass once more as he tells her ..
āAlright. Get to my room, want you naked and on the bed by the time I get there.ā
-
āCan-canāt! No more! Da-daddy no more!ā She cries out, tears soaking his sheets while he pounds into her from behind. Rafeās standing at the edge of the bed while gripping her hips. Heās holding her up, her lower half lifted with his strength as he manipulates her on his dick. Her upper half flat on the bed as she cries into the mattress. Theyāve been going at it for hours, heās grateful no oneās been home all day because with the way sheās screaming heās sure they can even hear her back on the Cut. The sheets are soaked from the amount of times heās made he cum, the last few times he managed to make her squirt a waterfall. Mixing with all the cum heās fucked into her thatās now dripping down her thighs and squelching around his dick. His stomach and thighs still wet from her arousal and his balls dripping with them. It was all so fucking good.
āShut up.ā He growls at her, he meant it when he said however he wanted. He meant it when he said he wants it to stick. Heās addicted to her pussy, her body and everything about her. She feels so much better than he imagined. Her perfume mixed with her natural scent is driving him insane, every ridge and piece of skin under his fingertips feels like itās meant to be in his hands. āTold you, I want it stick. So youāre gonna keep taking this dick.ā He groaned out to her, pounding into her abused cunt even harder and watching as his cum mixed with hers created a milky ring at the base of his dick. His trimmed bush soaked from their love-making, strings of their arousal clinging everytime he pulls back. A deep smirk settles on his face as he realizes heās branded her from the inside.
Sheās crying and squeaking from every harsh thrust, she feels utterly broken in and her mind has thoughts of only him. Heās fucked her dumb and she canāt imagine doing anything else except taking his dick for the rest of her life. Sheād known he was a good fuck if the bragging from Kook girls sheās heard at bonfires on the Cut was anything to go by. She feels so happy sheās finally getting a taste of it and she wants to cry at the thought of never getting it again. One of the hands that she used to gripped the sheets reaching back as she desperately seeks his affectionate, praying he intertwines his fingers with hers.
Rafe cooes at her flailing hand knowing exactly what sheās seeking and deciding to take pity on her. He immediately pulls out and shushes her whine at the empty feeling before manhandling her to lay on her back, immediately getting on his knees on the bed with his thighs spreading her legs out and pounds back into her with a sickening squelch. She reaches one hand behind her to grip the sheets while the other begins tapping against his pelvis to make him take pity on her. Hah! Like heād ever do that.
āYouāre crying for me to be nice to you and now youāre trying to stop Daddyās kindness?ā He tsked at her before grabbing her hand that was tapping at his stomach and intertwining their fingers, pressing her hand into the mattress above her had while her other one comes to scratch down his tanned back. Rafe leans down to give her soft pecks to her face as he grinds into her in hard, yet slow strokes. Her whines turning into mewls as she spreads her legs wider and welcomes the new speed. āYeah, mālittle slut just needed to be treated nicely, huh? Sāalright baby I forget little girls like you need their Daddyās to be sweet.ā He cooes at, his chest pressed to hers as her grinds into her nice and slow. He thinks this is the perfect time to tell her everything heās been planning since she agreed to be his.
āAfter this, māgonna move you in here. Donāt care what my father or Rose or whoever else has anything to say. Māgonna give you everything you want, gonna give you the life youāve been waiting for.ā He stops himself to let out a long drawn groan when she clenches even tighter at his words, her legs wrapping around him as the hand scratching down his back moves up to grip his his stringy strands of hair that are damp with sweat. Her lowered eyes looking into his and hanging onto every word with her long lashes clumped together from all the tears she shed, biting her swollen lips as she urges him to continue.
āYeah, yeah. Meant it, baby. Meant everything about making it stick. Wanted you from the moment I saw you, and now I finally have you and mānot letting go. Gonna take you out the Cut and bring you where you rightfully belong. With me and spoiled.ā She moans out at that and lifts her head up to close the distance between them, shoving her tongue in his mouth which is welcomed by him. Showing him how grateful she is, how much she wants that. She used the hand that was in his hair to wrap around his back and use it as leverage to push herself up and keep their chest pressed together as she begins fucking herself onto his dick. Her reaction to his words saying everything he needed to know.
āNo more cleaning houses, baby. One day this is gonna be all ours. Just you nāme.ā
-
A/N: I use to clean houses + offices so this hit home tbh :,(. Wish I had a sexy rich boy to save me from it ahhh! Enjoy! Please send in more request! Iām getting to the ones I have ASAP! Just so busy with school and work! š°šøš
#rafe cameron imagine#rafe cameron smut#rafe cameron angst#rafe cameron fanfiction#rafe cameron#rafe obx#drew starkey imagine#outer banks#rafe outer banks#drew starkey#rafe fluff#rafe smut#rafe cameron x reader#rafe x you#rafe x reader#rafe imagine#drew starkey x reader#drew starkey smut#rafe fanfiction
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Fun With Friends || Larry Johnson || Sal Fisher
Synopsis - A game of truth or dare turns into something more with your best friends Sal Fisher and Larry Johnson. {NOT a Sal x Larry fic!}
Warnings - NSFW.
Notes - Characters are aged 18+!
Word Count - 5k.
{Caffeinate Me}
You were sitting in Larryās bedroom in the basement flat of Addison Apartments with both Larry and Sal. The three of you were smoking, drinking and generally just having a good time. It was four in the morning and there was no sign of anybody going to sleep when Larry piped up, āletās play truth or dare.ā
You rolled your eyes at him playfully. It was such a childish game and yet, you couldnāt help but say yes to him. Sal looked to Larry in confusion and asked, āhow do you play?āĀ
āYouāve never played truth or dare?ā Larry asked, watching as Sal shook his head while he tightened the loosening prosthetic to his face. You sighed to yourself at this movement. You wish Sal felt more comfortable around you to remove his prosthetic after all, youād been friends for years. However you didnāt want to make him uncomfortable by bringing up the subject. Larry went on to explain the game to Sal, āitās simple, really. We each ask each other, ātruth or dareā and whichever one they pick, we give them! Y/N, letās go first, show him how itās done.āĀ
āAlright,ā you shrugged. āLarry, truth or dare.ā
Larry thought for a moment, stroking the small hairs on his chin. āErm, go on then. Give me a dare.āĀ
Now it was your turn to think. You thought hard, looking around the room for potential dares when your eyes settled on the whisky bottle in front of you. You leaned over to Sal and whispered in his ear so Larry couldnāt hear. When Sal nodded, you pulled away and looked at Larry with a grin. āWe dare you to drink that whisky, without stopping, for ten seconds.āĀ
āThatās it?ā Larry chuckled, grabbing the half-empty bottle of whisky from the floor.Ā
āI donāt think you can do it,ā you said playfully, folding your arms.Ā
Larry opened the bottle of whisky and gave it a sniff before responding. āWell prepare to eat your words.ā Larry smiled before he began to chug the bottle of whisky and you and Sal counted down from ten. This was more so to try and put Larry off, but that man was determined to never break a dare. And just like that, his ten seconds were up. When he pulled away from the whisky bottle, Larry made a face of utter disgust but with equal amounts of playfulness. āTastes better with lemonade thatās for sure,ā he chuckled as he wiped his mouth with his sleeve.Ā
You were half impressed with your friend and nodded slowly. āWell, I didnāt think youād be able to do it.āĀ
āSoā¦ What happens if you fail a dare?ā Sal asks, cocking his head to the side.Ā
āYou shook your head and laughed. āNothing Sal-ā
āYouāll just be known as a chicken forever and weāll lose all respect for you,ā Larry interrupted jokingly. You pushed Larry in the side, causing him to fall off the bed and onto the ground with a drunken giggle.Ā
āI think Iāll take a truth then,ā Sal said, smiling underneath his prosthetic.Ā
Larry stood up and sat back onto the bed next to you while flashing his friend a toothy grin. āAlright Mr Straight Aās. Did you ever cheat on a test when we were at school?ā
You could see Salās eyes widen through the holes of his prosthetic. He wanted to lie and say no, but what fun would the game be if he lied when he was supposed to tell the truth. So, he nodded. āOnce, yeah. It was on a physics test.ā
āWhy did you do that? You were great at school!ā Larry laughed, pouring himself another glass of whisky and lemonade for the three of you.Ā
āThat can be another truth for you and Iāll tell you,ā Sal smirked, winking at his best friend before turning to you. āOkay, Y/N. Truth or dare?āĀ
āTruth,ā you said, not even hesitating.Ā
The two men looked at each other and Larry nodded, signalling that he had a truth for you. āDo you have a favourite best friend?ā He asked, pointing between himself and Sal.Ā
You chuckled and shook your head. āNo. I love you both equally.āĀ
āCome on Y/N, thatās no fun!ā Larry pouted, watching as you took a sip of your drink.Ā
āNext time, ask me a better question then,ā you remarked. āOkay Larry, itās you again. Truth or dare?ā
āI pick dare,ā Larry said immediately.Ā
āErm,ā Sal thought before raising up a finger, signalling he had a dare for Larry. āTry to lick your elbow!āĀ
āSally, thatās a shit dare,ā you said, smiling widely at him.Ā
āItās all I could think of,ā Sal said with a shrug, smiling back at you awkwardly.Ā
But once again, Larry wasnāt one to break a dare and so, he attempted to lick his elbow. He failed miserably. You and Sal burst out laughing. āHa ha ha, so funny. Larry canāt lick his elbow!ā Larry said sarcastically, returning his arm to his side.Ā
āNo, no, itās not that. It was just the look of pure determination on your face!ā You squealed, leaning towards Sal and pulling the same facial expression that Larry had pulled. Salās laughter echoed through the room whilst Larry pouted at the pair of you.Ā
āAlright alright,ā Larry said in an attempt to get you to stop mocking him. āSal itās your turn, truth or dare?ā
āTruth, again.ā
āAre you crushing on anyone right now?ā Larry asked, watching as Sal lifted up his prosthetic slightly so he could take a large gulp of his drink.Ā
When he had finished drinking, he placed the glass on the bedside table and nodded shyly. āBig time.āĀ
āOh my God!ā Larry exclaimed. āWho is it? Why havenāt you told me?!āĀ
Sal found himself shrugging, āI didnāt think it was important to be honest with you.ā
Larry looked confused. This was major news and he wanted to hear more about it but you interrupted, a frown on your face. āIf Sal doesnāt want to tell you who his crush is, then leave him alone.ā
Larry stuck his tongue out at you before asking, ādo you know?āĀ
āNot a clue,ā you said truthfully, shaking your head.Ā
āHmm, fine. But one day Sally Face, your secret will become common knowledge to me,ā Larry said, his voice joking threat. āYour turn Y/N.āĀ
āI think Iāll go for dare this time,ā you grinned, nodding your head feeling confident. The last two dares had been easy ones, ones you would kill for, so you thought your two best friends would go easy on you. But no, Larry had to be Larry.Ā
āI dare you to take off your shirt,ā Larry said with a sly grin.Ā
You looked between your friends, shock laced your face. āMy shirt?ā You asked, tugging at the bottom of your shirt anxiously. Larry nodded, a mischievous grin on his face while Sal gulped down a lump in his throat. There was no way you were actually going to do the dare, right? You sighed and began to slowly remove your shirt, exposing your bra to your two male friends. Both of their eyes widened and Sal was thankful for the prosthetic covering his face because he was undoubtedly bright red.Ā
āHuh, I didnāt think youād actually do it,ā Larry said, biting his lip as his eyes raked across your chest.Ā
āDidnāt want to be known as a chicken,ā you replied, trying to act calmly as you took a sip of your drink. You sat awkwardly looking down at your chest before glancing at your friends. āWhat? Neither of you have seen a bra before?ā You joked, but they both shook their heads. You were slightly taken back by your friends answers, but just nodded your head and covered your chest with your arms before returning to the game. āAlright Larry, truth or dare?āĀ
āTruth.ā
You didnāt confer with Sal this time. After his little confession of never seeing a bra before, you had the perfect question. āHave you ever had sex with somebody?āĀ
That wasnāt the sort of truth question Larry was expecting you to ask and he was slightly taken back by it that he ended up choking on his drink. āW-What?ā He stuttered, wanting to make sure he had heard you right before confessing that he had indeed, never had sex before.Ā
āYou heard me, have you ever had sex?ā You repeated your question again, this time more slowly.Ā
Sal looked down at his feet awkwardly, tearing his eyes away from your half-exposed body as Larry shook his head and answered. āNo. Iāve not. I mean, Iāve kissed girls but never actually had, you know, sex.ā You smirked somewhat triumphantly. It felt as if you had gotten revenge for your dare, but little did you know this just meant Larry was about to ramp up the game.Ā
āAlright Sally Face,ā Larry slurred, the alcohol getting to him now. āTruth or dare.ā
āDare,ā he said stoically, although he already feared what his dare was going to be.Ā
āI dare you to take off your prosthetic and show our lovely Y/N here your face,ā Larry said.
Your eyes widened at Larryās dare for Sal and you shook your head. āSal, you donāt have to do that-ā you started, holding your hand out to touch his shoulder gently in a reassuring manner. But Sal was already removing the straps on the back of his head. When his prosthetic fell off onto the floor, Sal didnāt look at either you or Larry. He kept his head down and his eyes on the ground before downing the rest of his drink. Thatās when he looked at you, flashing you an awkward and yet somewhat apologetic smile. You leaned in closer to your friend, pressing a soft kiss to his scarred cheek. āYouāre beautiful, Sally.ā
āY-You think so?ā He asked through a slurred stutter. You pushed some strands of blue hair away from his face and nodded, a soft and gentle smile gracing your lips.Ā
āThatās cute,ā Larry snickered. āI dare you to kiss now.āĀ
āBut I was going to pick truth-ā
āI picked for you,ā Larry shrugged.Ā
You sucked in a deep breath and looked at Sal, a silent way of asking him for permission. He nodded to you, indicating that he was okay with it although he was shaking slightly from anticipation. You were so beautiful to him, and even more so with his prosthetic off. He could see every inch of you and he was loving it, and to know that you werenāt scared or repulsed by him just made his heart sing. You shuffled closer to Sal and wrapped your arms around his neck before pressing your soft, wet lips against his chapped ones. Sal didnāt know what to do with his hands, but he settled on placing them on your bare waist gripping ever-so-slightly. Meanwhile, Larry watched the two of you share a sweet, yet clumsy kiss. You stayed like that for a few moments, allowing yourself to get lost in the feeling of his lips on yours before you pulled away. As you did, Sal smiled softly at you, licking his lips. He had been rendered speechless.Ā
Larry spoke up once again, a mischievous smile on his lips. āNow, I dare you to kiss me.ā
You turned your head to look at him, eyes wide. You looked at Sal before looking at Larry once more, nodding sternly. You moved from Sal, shuffling across the bed to Larryās position. Before you even bent down to kiss him, Larryās hands were already on your waist pulling you down on top of his body. The kiss with Larry was more forceful than the kiss with Sal, but it was equally as clumsy. Larry became a little more suggestive as his hands moved along your hips, stroking them before sliding up your back to unhook your bra. A gasp of surprise tumbled from your lips as your bra slipped down your arms and off of your chest, leaving you completely bare to your best friends.Ā
āBut what about the game?ā You asked, pulling away from Larryās lips to look between him and Sal.Ā
āFuck the game,ā came Larryās response as he kissed you again. His tongue poked into your mouth and swirled around, savouring the taste of whisky and lemonade on your breath. Both Larry and Sal felt themselves harden at the sight of your exposed chest and Larry couldnāt hold himself back. His hands moved from the top of your back to your chest, pawing desperately at your tits. Then, his lips moved to your neck and Larry began to suck and bite at the soft flesh separating him from your jugular vein. You turned your head to the side to give Larry better access to your neck, taking the opportunity to look at Sal. A soft whimper escaped you as your eyes met Salās and you had to bite your lip to stop yourself making any more noise. You could feel the wetness growing between your legs at both Larryās movements and the way Sal was watching you intensely. As Larry continued to kiss up and down your neck, you used your forefinger to beckon Sal towards you. He hesitated but slowly made his way over to your side. You turned the top half of your body to face him, still sitting on top of Larry and grabbed Salās shoulders, pulling him towards your lips again. This time, the kiss was much fiercer. A whimper of surprise left Salās lips as he welcomed the kiss, your tongue trailed his bottom lip begging for entrance. Larry looked up from your neck to see you making-out with Sal and in response, bit down hard on your neck.Ā
āLarry!ā You shrieked softly between Salās lips. Salās eyes widened at the sound of your voice, the mixture of pain and pleasure evident in your tone only seemed to turn him on even more. His cock twitched in his jeans, begging to be released. Your lips moved against Salās desperately wanting a reaction from your best friend. Larry continued to palm at your chest as he sucked on your neck, flicking your nipples between his fingertips.Ā
You pushed Larry away and quickly manoeuvred yourself off of his body and grabbed the waistband of his sweats, pulling them down slowly to reveal his grey boxers. His cock strained against the tight fabric and you could see a wet patch starting to form around his tip as the result of the pre-cum. Larryās breath was shallow as you finally took off his trousers, eyes gazing up and down your body. He felt slightly embarrassed that you were seeing him in his boxers, but he wasnāt complaining. He had thought about this moment countless times. Once Larry was completely naked and gasped at the coolness of the air against his cock, you turned to Sal and smiled sweetly at him. āYour turn.ā
Sal gulped and nodded, allowing your fingertips to grace across his crotch as you unzipped and unbuttoned his jeans almost effortlessly.Ā āPlease Y/N,ā Sal whispered, his voice barely audible.Ā
As you began to slide his jeans down his muscular legs, you raised an eyebrow at him and asked, āwhat?ā
āIf weāre really doing this, I donāt want to be teased for my first time, please,ā he moaned. Salās boxers were looser than Larryās, but you could still see his distinctive hardened length twitching at your touch. You finally tugged off Salās jeans and boxers and threw them across the room to meet Larryās sweats.
You looked between the pair of them and smiled sweetly. āWho wants my mouth first?āĀ
Ā The pair looked stunned and looked at each other, silently deciding. After a few seconds, Sal nodded and Larry spoke up. āMe.ā You looked at Sal, making sure he was okay with being second, but he just shrugged. As long as he got you, he didnāt care. That was all the confirmation you needed to start moving back towards Larry. You teasingly lowered your mouth around him and looked up with your eyes to see Larry staring down at you. Once your lips touched the head of his cock, Larry couldnāt stop the moans. āOh fuck,ā he hissed, watching intensley as you lowered your head between his legs and wrapped your mouth around his length. Your mouth was so warm and wet around his hard dick that he wanted to cum immediately. Larry couldnāt help but grab your hair and keep your mouth still around him for a moment while he got used to the feeling of your mouth. Once he felt he was ready, he pushed your head further down, causing his cock to hit the back of your throat. You gagged slightly, but took his cock expertly. Sal was watching you the entire time, his hand hovering over his own cock desperate to relieve the itch he was feeling. Larry looked at Sal and grinned as he began to thrust in and out of your mouth. You closed your eyes as you began to suck, swirling your tongue around the tip and licking up the droplets of pre-cum oozing from the head. āOh God.ā
You opened your eyes and looked up to see Larry in a state of complete bliss. His eyes were now screwed shut and his mouth was hanging open for the silent moans to leave his throat. You looked at Sal, mouth still around Larry, and held out one of your hands. Sal looked confused and tilted his head to the side, but found himself moving closer to you. From what you could see, Larry and Sal were quite similar in size but Larryās cock was much fatter whereas Salās was thinner. Your hand wrapped around Salās skinny length and you began to pump experimentally as you continued to suck on Larry as if he were nothing but a lollipop. Both of the men were moaning your name in perfect harmony, it almost made you laugh at how easily you had gotten them in this state.Ā Ā
After a few more moments, Larry gasped. His eyes shot up and he jerked his cock out of your mouth. You looked at him in confusion but he quickly answered your silent question. āI was going to cum.ā
āI think Iām nearly there myself,ā Sal whispered, biting his lip.Ā
You removed your hand from Salās cock and looked between the pair of them, shaking your head. āNot yet. Neither of you.ā
Sal couldnāt help but groan as your small hand moved away from him, a cry of desperation leaving his lips. āWhy not?ā Sal asked, bucking his hips up in the air.Ā
āWant you cum inside of me. Both of you,ā you said, eyes narrowing. Both Larry and Sal widened their eyes at your words and looked at each other.Ā
āY/Nā¦ Are you sure?ā Larry asked, earning a nod of approval from you. Sal didnāt say anything, just watched on in surprise as you began to take off your pyjama pants and underwear. Was this really happening? This was a dream come true for both of the men in your presence that they almost had to pinch themselves to make sure they werenāt dreaming.Ā
Once you were completely naked, you looked between your best friends. You werenāt as nervous as you thought you would be but maybe it was the alcohol coursing through your veins. You couldnāt be sure though. You lay down on the bed and spread your legs wide, waiting for one of them to make the first move. Of course it was Larry. He pressed his lips to your lower leg and trailed up your thigh, stopping right before your cunt. You were about to look down to see what he was doing, when you felt cool air against your folds. Larry had blown on you and it had sent a shiver of pleasure up your spine, causing you to open your legs further. Larry grinned devilishly at you before plunging his tongue against your folds. You gasped and cried out, grasping at the sheets below you. Larry was relentless against your cunt, lapping and sucking like a dog starved. You never would have thought that this was his first time eating pussy, but it was. Sal waited patiently, watching and licking his lips as the sight of your legs quivering over Larryās shoulders.Ā
āDoes that feel good?ā Larry asked you as he began to nibble on your clit. You couldnāt form a coherent sentence for the life of you, so you just nodded excitedly. Your hands made their way to his long, brown hair and tugged lightly. This made Larry groan and another wave of pleasure spread through your body at the sensation.Ā
āI think she likes it,ā Sal mused, more so to himself than to Larry, but Larry heard and nodded. His hands grasped your hips, hard enough to leave bruises but you didnāt care. You pushed Larryās head further into your cunt and revelled in the feeling he was giving you.Ā
āOh Larry!ā You cried out. āIām going to cum if you keep on going like that.ā
āItās that easy to make you cum?ā Larry teased, but you didnāt hear him. Instead, you came. Harder than you ever had before. Your hands on Larryās hair tightened and you let out a yelp as you squirted over Larryās face, and that man didnāt waste a drop. He slurped you up like a cold drink on a summer's day. When you came down from your high, Larry was laying on top of you, staring into your eyes. āOh you look so hot when you cum Y/N. Doesnāt she Sally Face?āĀ
Sal nodded and let out a shaky breath. āYeah. Yeah she does.ā Salās hand was now wrapped tightly around his cock as Larry slicked the tip of his head against your soaked folds, lubricating himself.Ā
āI already know youāre going to feel so good,ā Larry mumbled to you, pressing his lips against yours as he slammed into you. You let out a choked cry and threw your head back against the mattress, eyes meeting Salās.Ā
āLarry, wait!ā You whimpered, attempting to stop his hips from moving. You were being stretched and were fuller than you have ever been before that it hurt, but it hurt so good. Larry halted his movements when he saw the tears in your eyes.
āAre you okay? Did I hurt you?ā He asked, panic lacing his voice.Ā
You shook your head and smiled at him. āNo Iām okay, justā¦ Just give me a minute to adjust before you carry on.ā
Larry nodded in response and Sal came over to your side to begin literally kissing your tears away. āYouāre okay,ā Sal cooed, his hand stroking your head gently. You wanted to reply, but you couldnāt and thatās when Larry started moving again.Ā
Larryās pace was brutal. Fast and snappy, just like him. He had been craving this moment since he learnt what sex was and now that it was finally happening, he was going to give it everything he had. Your hands flew up from the bedsheets to Larryās back, scratching down his skin and definitely leaving marks. Moans tumbled past your lips as Larry continued his strokes, his eyes never leaving yours with each movement he made. It was romantic, in a weird way. Sal continued to pump at his cock as he watched Larry pound into you, eagerly awaiting his own turn. āFuck you feel so fucking good,ā Larry growled as he dipped his head against your neck and began to bite yet again.Ā
āLarry, oh God Larry!ā You cried out, almost screaming. It was a good job that Larry lived alone and in the basement, because you definitely would have woken people up with the noises you were making. The bed began to creak and you feared for a second that it would break from the sheer intensity of Larryās thrusts, but it held. The headboard, however, began to slam against the wall which only spurred on your arousal. Sal tilted his head to the side as he watched Larryās cock emerge from your cunt before disappearing again, a sheer coat of wetness ringed around the base of his cock from your arousal and it was obvious that you were close to cumming again. Larry was close also, but he wanted to hold on for you. He wanted to give you one more orgasm before he finished inside of you, so he pulled his cock from your pussy and slipped two fingers inside of you with ease. He began pumping ruthlessly, your breasts bouncing from the force.Ā
āYouāre making it so hard not to cum right here and now,ā Larry grumbled. It was then that he felt you clench around his fingers and he knew that you were cumming. You tried to vocalise it, but you had definitely been fucked dumb and could only nod. āOkay. Iām going to cum now, okay?ā Larry said to you in a soothing voice. You looked at him through glossy eyes and opened your mouth to beg for him but all that came out was a loud shout as Larry slammed back inside of you, continuing his ruthless pace. Your walls fluttered around Larryās cock and within seconds he was spurting hot ropes of cum inside of you, moaning your name repeatedly as his head fell against your neck. His hips slowed down to a halt and after a few seconds, Larry pulled out of you. His hands caressed your face and hair as he pressed his lips to yours in a slow, passionate kiss. Then, he sat up and turned to Sal with a grin on his face. āYour turn.ā
You lay on the bed completely breathless as Larry rolled off of you and Sal climbed on to you. āY/N, you with me?ā Sal asked.Ā
āYeah,ā you breathed out. āIām with you. Please Sal.ā
Sal smiled softly at you before slowly inserting himself inside of you, stretching you in a different way to Larry. His pace was slow and sensual, loving almost. As if pouring all of his emotion into making love to you. Salās lips were on yours in an instant and you immediately kissed him back. Your hands wrapped around his neck pulling him as close as possible all while Larry lay on the bed next to you and poured himself another whisky and lemonade. āGod I love you. I love you so much,ā Sal whispered against your lips. Your eyes widened at his confession, but you couldnāt say you were totally surprised. You let out a gasp as the tip of Salās cock stroked your cervix and you fell apart immediately.Ā
āSally,ā you whimpered breathlessly, hands locking through his blue hair. Sal pulled away from your lips and rested his forehead against yours, eyes staring into your soul as he continued to thrust his hips against you. The pleasure felt too good that tears began pouring from your lower lash line.Ā
āShh youāre okay,ā Sal cooed, pressing his lips against your forehead. You smiled at him in reply and pressed a hand to his scarred face.Ā
āYouāre so beautiful Sal,ā you whispered, causing him to tear up.Ā
āIām glad you think so,ā he let out a breathy laugh and bit his lip as he sped up his pace slightly.Ā
āTouch my clit,ā you whispered to him. Sal trailed a hand down the front of your body and rested it between your legs, fingertips fumbling across your clit clumsily. Although he didnāt know what he was doing exactly, it felt good. āDonāt stop. Please donāt stop.ā
āI wonāt stop,ā Sal reassured you. āI wonāt ever stop.ā At those words, you felt your third orgasm approaching. You prompted Sal to move his fingers faster across your bundle of nerves and he did, finally pushing you over the edge. You cried out his name with a sob as you gushed around him, wetting the bed sheet and a bit of his torso. Sal smiled lovingly down at you as he felt your pussy clench around his cock. āCan I cum? Can I cum Y/N, please?āĀ
āYes Sally, please cum,ā you begged, continuously nodding your head. Sal sped up his pace again, the headboard snapping against the wall once more. His eyes rolled into the back of his head and with a loud growl, he came. You felt his cock twitch inside of you, swear you could feel his creamy load filling you up until you physically couldnāt take anymore.Ā
Panting, Sal kissed your cheek and your lips before whispering to you. āI love you Y/N.ā
You let out a sob at his words and pulled him close to you, not allowing his cock to slide out of you just yet. You could feel him softening inside you, felt his and Larryās mixture trickle down your thigh. It was definitely a feeling that you could get used to. Eventually, Sal moved and lay down next to you on the bed. He stared at the ceiling before he looked at you. You were already asleep, snoring ever so softly. Sal watched as your chest rose and fell with each breath you took, completely enamoured by you.Ā
āItās her, isnāt it?ā Larry asked quietly, looking at Sal over your naked body.Ā
āHmm?ā Sal asked, biting his bottom lip as he turned his head to face his best friend.Ā
āThe person youāre crushing on. Itās Y/N, isnāt it,ā Larry questioned, although it was more of a statement than an actual question. He already knew the answer.
āOf course,ā Sal mumbled, laying down and throwing an arm over you. He was careful not to wake you with his movements.Ā
āIā¦ Think I love her too,ā Larry confessed, gulping the rest of his drink before laying his head down on the pillow and closing his eyes. Sal didnāt respond, just hummed in acknowledgement. There wasnāt much he could say after all. Neither of them knew where they stood and they wouldnāt until you woke up. Did this mean something? Or was it simply just fun with friends? They would ask you in the morning, but for now, they let you sleep peacefully between them.
#sally face#sally face fandom#sally face x reader#sal fisher#sal fisher imagine#sal fisher imagines#sal fisher x reader#sal fisher x you#sally face imagine#sally face imagines#sally face one shots#sally face smut#sally face oneshot#sally face oneshots#sally face one shot#sal fisher smut#larry johnson x you#larry johnson imagines#larry johnson imagine#larry johnson x reader#larry johnson#larry johnson one shot#larry johnson one shots#larry johnson oneshot#larry johnson oneshots#larry johnson smut
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š©šš¢š«š¢š§š : boyfriend's best friend Hwang Hyunjin x fem reader
š¬š²š§šØš©š¬š¢š¬: you should've left your boyfriend sooner considering the man of your dreams, his best friend, has always been there for you... but the faithful event you were hoping for finally occurs and you find yourself at his house, in his arms, in his bed.
š šš§š«š: angst?, smut, fluff, aquaintances to lovers
š°šš«š§š¢š§š š¬: cheating (but not really, you'll see), reader is in a toxic relationship, explicit descriptions of sexual acts, unprotected sex (it's sexy but use protection babes), fingering, pretty vanilla.
š°šØš«š ššØš®š§š: 6.4K
I have a thing for sex while it rains, it seems... and like this I post something after months. I'll work this storyline in the future too for Hyunjin, but for now, enjoy!
It's strange how sometimes we believe to be in the right place to later find out we were living in a lie, a product of our fervid imagination, just to not accept reality and the fact that life, or even our past self, played a good and structured not-so-funny prank on us.
These lies we tell ourselves most of the time are a response to our awful experiences, but they can become harmful in numerous types of ways, and we should learn that instead of letting us be tempted by sweet beliefs. When we find ourselves facing reality it's hard to accept it, it's ugly, but ugly things are part of life and we should try and accept them nonetheless, they may reveal themselves as lessons or the best things that happened to us, with various meanings to that.
What pisses people off the most is the "waste of time". And that's how you feel too, like the rest of humankind, angry because you wasted time. You would very gladly prefer to be in the denial stage of the whole thing but it's so evident that you can't even pretend to be doubtful, to question what you saw, to give him a chance to explain himself.
The car is still cold even if you already reached the destination that popped in your mind right after what happened, salty tears adorning your eyes as they cross your freezing cheeks, collecting under your chin, falling on your scarf. The same damn scarf he gifted you after your first two weeks of dating, the one you didn't even like at all, the color you hated, a dull pattern over itā¦ the urge to pull down the car window and throw it outside in the middle of the parking lot soon becomes reality. Wind starts to rise a bit, and you see it dance on the wet concrete for a while before a car passes over it and plasters it on the ground.
Ironic, right? You feel a bit bad after the impulsive gesture, but he didn't hesitate to make you feel the same, so, "screw it".
You shouldn't even be here. You should go to your own best friend, sitting on her way too low couch with its broken springs and cry your eyes out as she yells at you her usual "I told you so!" and "You're an idiot, I knew it from the start!" even if what you really need is comfort, and not to be scolded like a twelve years old while she offers you chocolates and tissues like in some chichƩ romcom.
That's why Hyunjin's place is just few meters and five floors away from you now. You're actually hesitant to get out the car but when you see your boyfriend's text appear on your screen, asking where are you, it's suddenly not so difficult to take your things and rush to take the elevator, and when you send Hyunjin a message telling him you're in front of his apartment he's quick to open the door. He doesn't say a thing, he doesn't even dare to, he already knows.
He delicately takes your hand in his and guides you inside with a saddened smile, his eyes soft as they watch you attentively trying to search for your tears. God, he wants to kiss them all away, he never wants to see you like this ever again, but he thinks it's probably not the last timeā¦ is it? Either way, he'll do anything he can to make the redness of your eyes disappear.
"Go sit on the couch petal, relax for me, hm?" he says in a hushed tone to not provoke your impending outburst. When you're finally hugged by his cushions you feel his presence behind you, his hands going on your shoulders to free you from your heavy coat and bag that he places on his forearm. When he reaches for your scarf his fingers are suddenly met with the cold skin of your neck and a startled "oh!" escapes from him because of the unexpected touch, making you giggle. If only you knew how his heart starts beating faster whenever he hears you like thisā¦
"Where is your scarf? You always wear it, were you in such a rush to leave it at your place?" he's now lowered near your face, breath tickling your cheek as he adjusts your jumper on your shoulders ć¼ the stained one you only wear at home, you didn't even change, how embarrassing. He touches you like frail porcelain and little bumps start to rise on your skin where traces of his touch linger, you wish his fingerprints could bruise your skin.
"I threw it in the parking lotā¦" you explain, looking at him trying to not make your lips touch while doing so.
A laugh that comes from his chest slowly builds up as he lifts himself and reluctantly distances from your face to go place your belongings on the hanger at the entrance. If only he knew how your heart twists in excitement whenever you hear him like thisā¦
Hyunjin doesn't come back to you immediately. He always makes sure you have enough time to think by yourself first, to gather your words, to decide if you want to cry or yell, and then he sits beside you and goes along with anything you've come up with. It's always been like this until today, every time you came to his place after something happened between you and his best friend, every time he had to gather your broken pieces and try to put you together again. He doesn't know he's always done that beautifully though, making a breathtaking mosaic out of you, making you so splendid and wonderful anyone could say he's your creator.
You hear a distant rustling in the kitchen, the clicking of the bottles in the fridge as he closes it with a thud, two glasses colliding it seems, and his slippers sliding on the floor, approaching you.
"You're lucky petal, I have your favorite today." he proceeds to place the glasses on the way too elegant coffee table and pour the drink with all the calmness in the world. Time with Hyunjin stops. You think that every second spent with him is never wasted.
"I like this clip, it compliments your hair color." he says suddenly, snapping you out of your trance. How could he notice such a thing?
"Really? It's the first time I wear itā¦" you still mumble a bit, too shaken to let your voice take its natural timbre. Hyunjin laughs again, handing you the drink and carefully sitting so as to not spill everything on his expensive carpet. His body is completely facing yours, knee against knee.
"It's not true!" Hyunjin takes a sip and giggles at your confused expression.
"You had it the first time we met, too. It was perfect with your dress and necklace. Do you really not remember? You looked beautifulā¦"
What Hyunjin refers to is a random saturday evening of autumn. What day it was, what you were wearing, what you did before meeting in front of the restaurant, you can't rememberā¦ but what you can vividly recall is the stinging sensation of the first cold breeze of the season on your cheeks, how crunchy multicolored leaves swirled on the sidewalk, and the city lights beginning to be turned on a bit earlier than usual. Now that you think about it, it was around this period. You remember what perfume you wore, paying attention to what type of impression you wanted to give to your boyfriend's group of friends that you were about to meet for the first time, and you even remember what mascara you decided to use.
But what remained tattooed on your bones the most are the first ten seconds of Hwang Hyunjin taking possess of your vision, because you felt incredibly sick.
If you close your eyes and concentrate you can almost feel the same emotions, when your stomach swirled like it was a washing machine, your head light, and your legs almost giving in making you trip while standing still.
You felt incredibly guilty, disgusted with yourself, disappointed, a monster. Why the hell your first thought was "he's my soulmate" and not something along the lines of "nice, my boyfriend's best friend" you still don't know. Call it destiny, call it sixth sense, you immediately tried to suppress it all.
It didn't help that Hyunjin's slender fingers delicately took your hand to kiss your knuckles with his oh, oh so beautiful lips like an ambassador of chivalry itself, his siren eyes looking up at you sweetly but confidently, making you blush like crazy ć¼ you later blamed your flustered expression to the restaurant's excessive heating.
On top of that, your boyfriend decided to sit at your side leaving Hyunjin in front of you, so you had his ridiculously handsome face in sight for the whole night as you ate your stupid california rolls and tried to elegantly slurp your noodles ć¼ for as much as something like that is even possible.
You talked, a lot, even if you felt your face heat up at every strangely seductive giggling sound he made together with the little bumps his shoes would land on your naked ankles, toying with your heels from time to time. You had so much in common, and after that you only felt complete when he was near you.
Your boyfriend did catch on with the new dynamic though, so unfortunately considering how jealous and a bit possessive he is, you and Hyunjin didn't see each other as often as you expected after that, but you really didn't grasp that it was because he wanted you apart at first, just a series of unfortunate coincidences.
Hyunjin parted from you with a tight hug, lingering his hands on the smaller of your back, adjusting your shawl over your coat and twirling a strand of your hair behind your ear, the moment never fully leaving your memory. He wasā¦ perfect, really just perfect, and you couldn't help but feel nauseous when you got in the car with your boyfriend to let him accompany you to your apartment, the thought of another man being more suited for you making you feel like you were cheating. You only felt relieved when you talked about all his friends during the ride and he revealed that Hyunjin is "a bit of a player, y'know, he flirts with everyone and he has those french manners, but he's always been like this." so you thought that maybe your feelings would slowly fadeā¦ but they always, always rested down the bottom of your heart, even if you pushed them away forcefully, almost violently.
No one knows you two meet up from time to time now, because one time you found yourself crying in a corner on his shouler. No one knows that you always seem happy and carefree only because you talk with Hyunjin, because he comforts you when you need it without complaining. Not that it needs to be a secret, but you both are well aware that it may result suspicious to meet with your boyfriend's best friend late at night, best friend's girlfriend from his side.
And the fact that you two always seem to attract each other like magnets, so close, with instant connection, it doesn't let thoughts stray further from the idea of something tender existing between the two of you, everyone can see it.
It's just that it's prohibited. Or, to say it better, you were too caught in your lies to even contemplate the idea of leaving your boyfriend and Hyunjin simply didn't want to betray his "friend". But when you started to message him asking for advice, when you later had long calls together, when you crumbled in his arms crying almost weekly, he wasn't so sure about having a best friend anymore.
"Iā¦ you really think I was beautiful?"
Your question comes from the heart. The mixture of the memories of that night and his proximity makes heat rise on your face, shyness visible from the automatic action of your teeth catching your bottom lip and your gaze straying from his face to linger on the glass in your hands. The bubbles of the drink fizzle on the surface and for a moment or two that's all that can be heard in the room.
"You're always beautiful, y/n. I told you many times." he says cautiously, putting down everything to wrap his hands around your wrist.
"I don't know how he doesn't make you feel like you are, I don't know why he treats you like this but, petal, you're an incredible woman," he lowers his head to look into your eyes as he tries to explain himself further, "smart and strong. He's an asshole and you should stop doing this to yourself."
Does he know? Does he know what your boyfriend did? Probably not. Hyunjin would never hurt you, he would've immediately told you. You want to make sure though, in case everything that involves Hyunjin is a lie too.
"Why are you his friend then? Why do you keep coming to our house and have dinner as we fake not knowing each other like we really do? Why do you keep on hanging out with him? If you really think he's terribleć¼"
"Because I want to protect you."
His reply is fast, cutting you off. His stare bores into your eyes and drinks in all of your feelings, like he can see them displayed in front of him. A few seconds of silence fill the room and you suddenly gulp down your drink until the last drop, sprinting up from your seat and escaping his intoxicating presence that's almost engulfing you.
Hyunjin doesn't say a thing. He waits, he can sense that something big happened this time and fuck if he's going to kill his "friend" after this. You were never this silent, you usually would storm inside and throw yourself on himā¦ for as much as he dislikes seeing you like this, he's grateful for your presence, for the feel of your body against his, the trust you put into him. He doesn't do all this just to be a rebound, he already knows part of him is yours and vice versa, so he's simply waiting. Everyone considers him being a romantic man, but really, he just believes in destiny. When Hyunjin first saw you every cell in his body started to boil, goosebumps rising down his nape, the world destroyed itself and was reborn before him, it's impossible that it didn't matter at all.. That was the day he realized he didn't know what "love" meant before.
He watches your silhouette get near the big windows that face the road, little droplets of water striking them. The sound of the rain reaches your ears only when you notice the detail, and soon you see how much water is actually coming down from the sky, your scarf already soaked and dirty laying alone between various cars. You take a deep breath, thinking about your next words, a way to tell Hyunjin what happened without sounding pathetic as you concentrate on the mesmerizing foliage outside, reds and oranges and yellows decorating the city landscape.
"He accidentally left his phone at home since he rushed to his office, I don't exactly know whyā¦" you started to explain, hands fidgeting with your rings, heavy breath obstructing your throat, "and I heard a notification so I went to check right?"
Hyunjin slowly gets up and approaches you, his warmth radiating behind you now, hands resting on your shoulders and caressing them as he listens and slowly gets closer and closer until he's hugging you.
"So, petal? What was it about? Did you find porn?" he tries to guess, but when you shake your head as a 'no' a cold chill goes through his back. Oh, oh noā¦
"Itā¦ it was a message, a very sexual one, coming from a saved contact, I don't even remember the name." you pout, looking down almost in shame even if you're not the responsible one. Maybe it's the shame of having a cheater as a partner.
"I opened the chat Hyunie. They've been sexting for months and from what I could grasp they even met few timesā¦" you can feel tears start to form on your waterline again, a deep ache inside your chest rises when you finally say it out loud. One thing was to acknowledge it, another was to tell everything to the man you've secretly been in love with for a year already. What were you doing exactly all this time?
"Am I really not good enough for anyone, Hyunie? She'sā¦ she's so different from meā¦ Am I really a disaster as he says? Why would he do that to me? I've always been a good girlfriend, I even ignored all those mean words and his being immature and the shitty sex!! I put aside my needs to make him happy thinking I was the problem!" you turn around to face him and you're met with his serious expression.
You expected to find him at least slightly surprised by your sudden show of emotions, but he's calm, he radiates calmness. Hyunjin sighs and looks in the distance behind you for a second, blinking ever so slowly, his touch traveling up to cup your cheeks and wipe your angry tears with his thumbs.
That's the final stroke, the gesture that makes you sob and bury your face in his chest to hide.
You aren't broken yet, it's almost as if Hyunjin is physically holding you together. He's trying to smooth the new sharp edges that formed around your heart to not let it be isolated, while hugging you he's working hard to let it be still approachable to receive and give love, he's trying with all he has to prevent a horrible plague that's trying to approach you.
You hold his shirt between your hands, tightly, you're afraid you'll ruin it but you can't stop, you need to ground yourself and try to be strong, but it's so hard to not let him sway you around the room, lullying you as he hushes you and lets his fingers comb your messy hair.
"Leave him."
You freeze.
Did he really say that? Hyunjin never said it out loud. He did make you understand his vision about the situation, he did suggest it with hidden phrases, but so explicitlyā¦
"It's time to let him go, don't you think?" he presses his lips on your forehead, continuing to mumble his real feelings, "You don't need someone who mistreats you petal. You deserve better." he closes them in a kiss that leaves a mark on your soul, making you gasp.
"Hyunjin?" it takes a lot of strength to look up at him. His eyes seem less gentle, brows forming a frown that's not his usual playful one, a bit scary even. The mole under his eye is contracted and his mouth is curved in disgust, just enough for you to understand he's furious.
"Why donāt we put an end to this farce? He didn't even deserve you in the first place, you don't love him, stop doing this to yourself y/n. There's someone who's the right one, for sureā¦" his tone is desperate, but you want him to say it clearly. You can't help it, if it's to be sure or to satisfy a need you've been having for a while you don't know, but you want him to say it loud and clear.
You know that if he says it now everything will change and it'll be scary as fuck, but if that's a premise for a better lifeā¦ maybe it's not as scary as you think, it's Hyunjin after all, the man who's looking at you in adoration.
"And what man could possibly want me at this point?" your voice is shaky and uncertain as you tease the confession out of him.
Hyunjin looks away and smiles, a bit frustrated. He wipes another tear away from your cheek and then places his hands on your waist.
"Me?" he fakes the question, smiling softly; "Be mine y/n."
Breath gets caught in your throat as he finally says it. It's wrong that you waited for it, it's wrong that your first instinct is to say yes without thinking about it.
"Hyunjin Ić¼"
"Ooh don't say you don't reciprocate, petal. I know you too well." he interrupts you, his hold a little tighter. Hyunjin tilts his head to the side, few strands of black raven hair following the motion and slightly covering his eyes. He's beautiful now, even more than in any other moment you've ever been with him. Hyunjin is the most beautiful man in the world and he wants you.
Your phone starts ringing. It's a strange moment to realize your ringtone is kind of cringe, cutting the tension weirdlyā¦ but you can't laugh, not right now. Both you and Hyunjin know who it is.
He's right. You should put an end to all this and start to think for yourself, about what you really want, need. This is not wrong. To love yourself isn't wrong, and Hyunjin makes you feel like the person you want to be.
"Do you want to pick up?" Hyunjin takes his hand under your chin again and directs it up to make your eyes meet his, gaze frenetic as he tries to not look at your tempting lips. Everything will depend on what you decide now. And you think quickly, under pressure, and you don't know if it's a good idea or not but you shake your head and hold him tighter, hiding again.
"Y/n, please look at meā¦"
The phone eventually stops ringing and silence overwhelms you when you can hear his fast heartbeat right against your ear. And it's because of you, it's for you, your heart starts to adapt to his and you almost feel pain in your chest. It's too much, too muchā¦
Ah, that's it.
You get on your tiptoes to pull him down by his collar and make your lips crash together.
Hyunjin drags you towards him as if you kissed thousands of times before, immediately, tongue slipping into your mouth as you grant him access, making it run along yours. You hold his shoulders trying to search for your lost balance and he's quick to walk you towards his bedroom, he isn't even slightly hesitant.
The desperate sighs you two let out add into the sound of your first kiss; it's a relief, something you didn't imagine to need so badly. Hyunjin pushes you further into the room until your legs meet the mattress and you fall on it guided by him, a knee starting to press beside you as he cradles on the bed on top of you. He can't stop kissing you.
Hyunjin clumsily reaches the lamp on the nightstand to turn it on and oh, oh if this is even better than any fantasy he's ever hadā¦ seeing you panting with that flustered expression, your legs already crossing beneath him, jumper half lifted up, your hair all disheveled since you quickly reached for your clip and threw it somewhere in the room. You just look breathtaking in his eyes, even more than any other moment he's ever thought about it. He has to let you know. You didn't think he'd turn on the light but maybe you can put aside your shyness for once if it means having this type of gaze reserved to you.
Your hands try to reach his shirt to pull him out of his trance and he resumes his kissing, hands flying on your sides as they slowly, painfully slowly slide down until he's hooking your pants. Hyunjin lowers down to press chaste kisses on the little part of your cleavage that is exposed, going down to your stomach, then your belly, until he darts his tongue out to lick a stripe just above your groin, leaving a longer kiss there while he proceeds to undress you.
The way you feel embarrassed when you remember you're wearing plain, white cotton pantiesā¦ but it's honestly sending him haywire. The fact that you didn't expect to end up like this, a confirmation that you didn't plan anything to happen, it's making Hyunjin even harder in his confines. You're so wet your juices dampened the fabric, making it almost transparent, and he sighs at the faint outline of your cunt now puffy and pulsingā¦ and he still has to touch you properly.
Hyunjin is honestly the same. You can't see it but waves of excitement run over him so violently he physically trembles and his legs give in from time to time.
āI'm gonna fuck you so good you won't dare to come back to himā¦ā it's whisperes, almost as if he's accidentally thinking out loud but it makes you clench. Hyunjin's fingers start to tease you on top of the fabric, seeing the wet patch getting larger and larger. You can't believe this part of him existsā¦ how many things do you still have to learn about him?
Hyunjin keeps on touching you there but this time he starts flicking, snapping his fingers where you're most sensitive, the tingles that start to make you jolt are strong and they make your breath sharp.
āH-Hyunjinā¦ā your stuttering voice slightly higher as you call for him, he rolls his eyes back.
āHyunjin pleaseā¦ā you can't help but pant, wrapping your hand around his forearm to try and make him slow down. Is this what those stupid magazines talked about? That sex feels better when you do it with someone you love? So fucking true.
Hyunjin feels on cloud nine. He starts paying attention on your neck tenderly but still with open-mouthed kisses as his fingers subtly slide your panties to the side. āYeah petal, let me hear you, let meā¦ā his words get lost as he concentrates. Ah, it's uncomfy for him. Hyunjin lifts your legs and carelessly slides your underwear off with a hiss, his eyes closing like they've been blinded by the vision of the Virgin Mary for a second, then maniacally staring at your bare cunt, digits caressing your wet folds mere seconds before plunging into your entrance.
You can only let out a choked moan and push your head back onto his soft cushions, that smells just like him. You're completely surrounded by his presence when his scent is all around you, his fingers move smoothly to work you open and his mouth is now latched around your nipple, his forehead pushing your jumper further up. When the hell did heā¦
āIs it good?ā his voice displaying signs of fatigue, urgency and need buried deep inside him. You know his fingers are long but God if they can reach otherworldly places. It's not the in-and-out motion but the brushing of your g-spot that makes your legs close around his sides and poke his ribcage with your knees; he doesn't mind, your tits keep him occupied enough to make him mindlessly keep going. Hyunjin decides that prefers your chest covered in love marks over any art piece he's ever seen these past years, so nothing can disturb his work in progress. Maybe the work itself.
āāS good Hyunie, Hyunā¦ā it's difficult to breathe, it's difficult to think straight as the bumps of his fingers touch your insides so precisely, as if you've always done this and he already knew your body by memory.
āDid his fingers ever make you feel like this? Hm?ā
The question makes you sigh along with a moan. You shake your head.
āDid he ever kiss you like I do?ā and Hyunjin kisses you again as the movement of his fingers fastens. His teeth catch your bottom lip and his tongue slides against yours before he sucks it, drool making it shine where you two meet; passionate and euphoric, it feels like experimenting fireworks. You follow his lips when he detaches, but he just smiles and starts pressing his thumb on your bare clit. āTell me, petal.ā
āN-noā¦ā
Hyunjin feels it, the way you start clenching around him, hard. He almost can't move anymore. So he whispers, just above the squelching of his palm spreading your wetness.
āWanna go to Heaven with me, y/n?ā
How, how can you say no? You need Hyunjin, even more than oxygen right now, he already has you completely. Your hands hurry on the button somehow miraculously keeping his pants together, and you reach his zip and pull the fly, that struggles to slide down ć¼ he's too full.
āWanna try how a real man makes you feel?ā
You nod almost too eagerly and he chuckles within a whiffle. Hyunjin deprives you of his fingers despite your whines of protest and spreads your juices all over his face, tongue swirling on his hand. A low groan comes out from him, his touch moving to your hips where he squeezes, plush skin bending under his grip. It's all in contrast with the look in his eyes as he stares at your face, your reactions, as if you were the most adorable thing he's ever seen.
You're so distracted that when you feel something poke your inner thigh you gasp, and can only stareā¦ his cock springs free from his confines altogether, long, slim and leaking, underside vein pulsating under the pads of his fingers as he pumps himself few times, precum dripping on your groin. Hyunjin's eyebrows are knitted together as he grinds between your legs, his still sticky hand moving your lower body closer so that he lifts you back up to wrap his arms around you, hugging you ever so gently.
His full lips kiss your cleavage and he curses under his breath because of his choice to not take all your clothes off but there's not much time anymore. You close your fists on his shirt, the lines of the fabric changing their shape under your hold while you wait for him, subtly writhing impatiently.
āHyun please hurryā¦ā not once in your life you've been this desperate for a man to fuck you. It's not because of the wait, not because you're horny, it's just that it's Hyunjin.
āSay it.ā his eyes are darker, but they shine with the yellow-ish light in the room. He clears your forehead by adjusting your hair away.
You know what he's doing and it's nothing different from what you did before, in the living room, so you're more than willing to satisfy his request. You try to regain a bit of composure and steady your breath before speaking up, his head twitching together with every movement of yours.
"I want you, Hyunjin. I want you, please.ā
A big bright smile spreads on his face as his head drops low, in disbelief. Hyunjin didn't imagine those words would have such a strong effect on him but here he is, blushing and trying to hold back a giggle. When he looks back at you he's serious again, eyes piercing into yours.
āI'm going in, hm? I wanna hear you scream my name through it all. Is that clear petal?ā
What you'd give to hear him call you petal until the end of time, he says it and it's like dripping honey, he says it and you melt. The warm pool of pleasure in your belly tightens again as you say a shaky āyesā. You're his delicate, fragile petal.
His tip rests just before your entrance for a second while he takes a deep breath, breaching you gently. It's not a big stretch but his veins are already making your eyelids flutter and your lips part. Inch by inch, Hyunjin makes sure you feel his cock going deep, concern showing on your features as he doesn't come to an halt. He does, eventually, but the time he took to do it seemed eternal. āOh my- Hyunie-ā
āBet my dick feels better than his,ā he smirks between the kisses he's leaving under your jawline, āI bet mine's longer too.ā
His comments only add fuel to the fire. He's bigger, he's better, the curve of his cock lands exactly on the spot that makes you black out. As you remember that you're technically still in a relationship your phone rings again. It's a distant sound, it's in another room, covered by yours and Hyunjin's sighs and moans, but he hears it too. Hyunjin stops every movement, hips against yours as he's fully inside you. He lifts himself up just enough to check on you. You look at him too.
You don't exchange any word, there's no need to, because you both arch your lips upwards and meet mid-air for another kiss, tender but messy as he moves backwards to get a starting point to his thrusts. The ringtone eventually dies making room to the faint dripping of the rain outside.
You feel warm, squeezing his cock just right and he's sure he will never let you go, never let you change your mind.
āPussy ās so tight petal, was made for me, ām sure,ā and he starts moving with consistency, picking up a pleasant rhythm, āyou're so fucking perfect.ā
His necklace is cold against your skin as he keeps on holding you flush against him, as well as your rings leaving icy lines on his back when your hands slip under his shirt and hold onto his shoulder blades. Hyunjin throbs inside you, drawing loud moans out of you that someone will for sure complain about. He thrusts harder, faster, every second that passes and you can only call for his name, yours being whispered by him against your skin making you shiver.
āWaited so long, so fucking long-ā a guttural sound interrupting him, āsince that time at the club, wanted to make you mine.ā he mumbles, words hardly making sense but you decipher them anyway and when you realize what he's talking about the confused memories of it flood your mind. You, swaying your hips in front of him, grinding your ass on his crotch following the music; Hyunjin's hands right under your breasts guiding you together with him, his breath fanning on your neck, drying your tears completely as those three drinks made your head light enough to not care about any problem you complained about minutes before. It was just you and Hyunjin, all this would've happened sooner if a series of coincidences didn't happen.
āYou would've let me take you in the bathroom, isn't that right?ā Hyunjin asks, not losing concentration even for a second. āI wanted to bring you here, and fuck the sadness away. Every time, y/n, I wanted to tell you to forget him and be with me.ā
You feel him stretch his arm between your bodies, and you feel your swollen bud stimulated again, you both whine against each other.
āāM with you now Hyunie, want only you, ām yours babe.ā
He's so fast now, the snapping of his hips moving you up and down the mattressā¦ your words affect him on a visceral level.
āI choose you, I'll leave him for you-ā
āFuck!ā he's close, so, so close and your walls tightening more and more and more are making him go crazy. Little beads of sweat decorate his forehead, a caramel-like smell coming from him as the crown of his head dampens and some hair stick to his forehead.
His tip keeps abusing your sweet spot, the kiss you share is feverish, your nails dig into his skin and his hold bruises your soft one. Both your bellies contract and before you can process it you're coming, white pois pattern creating over your blinding vision. You say his name out loud, dragging it together with your last moan as the hardest orgasm ever washes over you. Hyunjin pulls out just in time, copious white ropes of cum landing on your stomach like dripping art. Hyunjin loses track of space and time for a few moments as he comes down from his high, then takes you close to him when he lays next to you. Your heavy breath fills every other sound in your ears as you get comfortable hiding in his muscular chest. Your body spasms, all energy left your body already and your chest rises and falls frantically.
Hyunjin caresses your cheek and kisses your hair. It's peaceful. You just had sex with your boyfriend's best friend and it feels peaceful. It starts to feel a bit cold so he grabs the soft sheets near him and covers both of you.
āWhen will you tell him, petal?ā
The question floats in the air for a while. You start playing with his necklace, making it dance between your fingers. He starts to worry a bit, when you don't answer him, but he decides to be patient, like always.
āAfter we eat something, I'll send him a text.ā you seem resolute, and he's convinced. āCan I stay here tonight?ā
He's a bit taken aback, his eyes narrowing in surprise: āWasn't it obvious? You'll stay here from now on anyway.ā and he says it so naturally, you think he's thought about this moment a lotā¦ it makes you smile.
Hyunjin rolls to the side briefly, taking some tissues to wipe yours and his stomach since his sticky cum was still there, and kisses the tip of your nose adjusting your jumper back to its original place before sitting on the edge of the bed and taking his phone, after finally freeing himself of his shirt. His back is slender yet defined, long, his spine making a beautiful curve. Your eyes travel from his nape to his glutes, the ones of a dancer. There's a doubt still in the back of your mind, you need to make it disappear.
āAre youā¦ sad, that you can't be friends with him anymore?ā
He doesn't even bother looking at you to answer, he keeps scrolling on the delivery app searching for something you may want to eat, the words he's about to say seeming obvious to him.
āWe haven't been friends for a while already. I understood he's not the guy I met years ago, he changed, and I don't like to be around him anymore. Don't worry petal, it's not entirely because of you, I already wanted to part from him but you came into our lives so I endured it some more to stay with youā¦ and it was worth it.ā one of his hands shifts position behind him and taps the covers to signal for you to hold it. Your fingers interlace and he looks at you over his shoulder, slowly turning around, his body twisting slightly as he leans back again and kisses you sweetly yet still with some need.
Your breath is now steady, you're relaxed and it feels like Heaven, just like he promised.
"Pizza?"
You giggle and he follows.
āI love you y/n. I love you.ā
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Can you do a Choso x reader where Choso manipulates the reader to marry him? Choso treats the reader like a princess, making her fall in love with him, but then one day as Choso and reader were on a date...reader talks to another guy making Choso jealous. So he brings her home punishing her for "cheating"
Cheating on me, darling?
Warnings : smut , heavy smut, unprotected sex, Noncon, Kidnapping, physically and emotional abuse, biting, torture, size difference, blaming of cheating ....
( All characters are aged up/18+)
Minors Do Not Interact
Read the warnings carefully....if you don't like my stories block me not report
Choso kamo. He's my college friend. I know him from my college. We're good friends until that night came. I was returning home from college. That night was too late. I don't know what where and it happened but I felt a cloth on my mouth and I fully fainted then and there.
When my eyes opened again I was in a room. Then I saw someone. When he came infront of me I saw it was Choso. I asked him why I was here and what happened. He told me some boys followed me and put a cloth on my mouth and I fainted. But Choso was on the way and he saw me he helped me and took me to his home. I was shocked. Didn't even suspect his lie. Then he proposed me... told me how much he loves me... and manupulate me. And dumb me got manupulated by him!
Today we planned for a dinner. Actually He was the one who planned for it. It was in a fancy restaurant. Choso wore a white shirt, rolled up sleeves, black pant and black tie. I wore a maroon long sleeveless dress. Then we went to the restaurant.
It was a great place. I loved that. And Choso was so happy too that he made me happy. We were having dinner when we were talking with each other. When I suddenly saw my old school friend there. He was working there as waiter. He was my childhood friend. I talked with him a bit. But Choso didn't like that. But he didn't show that to me. Our dinner was done and we left for our home. Choso drove us home but still didn't tell me anything.
We arrived at our house. I unlocked the door. Suddenly felt a push from behind and sound of locked the door. When I turned around it was Choso. He was looking at me with anger. "What happened?" I asked. "So you are cheating on me...huh?" He said with grinded teeth. "What are you saying?" I asked. "That shitty friend of yours.... you're cheating on me with that shit?" He asked. "Choso I think you're misunderstanding something " I said. "Oh..so I'm wrong now? Should have teach you a lesson in time.... but it's not too late yet" he replied with a smirk.
He grabbed my hair and dragged me towards his bedroom. I groaned in pain. He threw me on his bed and locked the door. Took off his shirt and threw it on the floor then started crawling towards me on the bed."please stop" I said and tried to push myself backwards but he grabbed my leg and pulled me towards him. I gasped. He was still smirking."stop?... Where's the fun then? The fun part is about to began ~" he whispered and crashed his lips on mine.
I tried to push him away but his grip was too strong. I can't even move myself. He was kissing me too roughly. I couldn't breathe. He grabbed the hem of my dress and pulled it over my head. My boobs bounced out. He looked at those with lust in his eyes and didn't waste any time, crashed his mouth on my breast licking, sucking and teasing the nipple and squeezing the other one with his hand. I moaned in the sensetion. I grabbed his hair and tried to stop him by pulling it but it didn't even effect on him. "C-choso stopppp" I scremed but he didn't stop.
Then he took off my pantie. He looked at my pussy. He rubbed his finger on my clit and whispered " so wet. You naughty little slut, getting wet for me huh?". Then he licked my pussy. I couldn't help but moan loudly. He smirked at my reaction and undo his pant.
His dick sprang out. It was too big and too thick. Fear grabbed me by my neck. " C-choso no no no... P-please no... s-stop" I begged but didn't even listen to me and slammed his whole dick inside me in one slide. I scremed. He didn't even give me time to adjust his size and started thursting in and out roughly. I was throughig my legs with pain and begging him to stop. And he was liking it so much. His thurst became harder and harder. I clenched around him tightly and he moaned loudly " ughhhhhh....ahhh s-so...ahhhh....so f-fucking tight " he started rubbing my clit with his thumb and I bite his shoulder scratched his back to control myself. With a few more thurst I came. He was still thursting roughly. I felt his cock pulsing inside me. I tried to push him away with all of my strength." Ughh...no no no no...ahhhhhh... I don't want this ..." I moaned. He grabbed my throat and chocked me down to the bed. " Shhh.... shut up and just fucking take what I'm giving you." He screamed. Within a minute he came inside me I could feel his seed inside me. He pulled out. My vision blurred out.
"Don't ever again forget about the consequence of trying to cheat on me, darling " he whispered in my ear.
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#jjk#jjk smut#smut#jujutsu kaisen smut#tw noncon#fem reader#choso smut#choso kamo#choso x reader#jjk choso#jujutsu kaisen choso#kamo choso#Choso#yandere jujutsu kaisen#yandere#yandere choso#manipulation#manipulative#obbsessive#obssesive#possessive#Choso noncon#dark content#dark blog#dark romance
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į”£š© FRANCESCA
FEATURING: beast dazai osamu
SUMMARY: fate will always find a way. {wordcount: 22.1k; fem!reader; romance & tragedy}
AUTHOR'S NOTES: wow guys i can't believe it's over. i won't lie this chapter was an absolute monster to write, i cried and rewrote several times, but i think it came out the way i was hoping. i'll leave some more notes at the bottom so as to not spoil, but i hope you enjoy, it's been such a crazy ride, ily all lots. as always, reblogs appreciated
GENERAL WARNINGS: mcd. dissociation. explicit mentions of past self-harm & suicide attempts. dazai describes his scars as "gross" and "ugly". implications of child abuse. suicide. i believe that's all, if there's any i'm missing, pls let me know, this is a heavy chapter obviously.
SEE: UNREAL UNEARTH SERIES MASTERLIST READ: BADLANDS SIDE A
ā... You said you have a brother?āĀ
You look up from where your head is resting on Dazaiās chest, peering at him with furrowed brows. He raises his eyebrows, hoping the curiosity on his face comes across as innocent. In his defense, it mostly isāDazai only wants to know because heās wondering if heās correct in assuming the mentions of your brother were in the present tense because heās still alive.Ā
If thatās the case, then thatās another first in this universe, he thinks. As far as Dazai is aware, in every other universe, your brother has been long dead by the time Dazai meets you and if thatās changed, it had to have been because of something Dazai unwittingly did, otherwise what else wouldāve led to such a drastic change from the norm.
He doesnāt recall if you ever mentioned anything of significance about your brother in any of the other universes. The most he remembers is that in some, he passed away when you were sixteen and that he was involved with some shady business. You claimed that it was something to do with underground rings but if Dazaiās right in assuming that he is still alive, then Dazai thinks that the underground ring business was a cover for Port Mafia business, because the only thing that so drastically changed in the years your brother would have died was Dazai coming into contact with the Book and upending the Port Mafiaās operations.
āI do,ā you say, shifting to prop your chin up on his shoulder, you lean in to brush your lips against his jaw and Dazaiās eyes flutter shut, lifting his hand to caress the small of your back. āWe donāt speak anymore.ā
God, Dazai doesnāt think heāll ever get used to this. He lifts his free hand to cup your cheek, watching as you lean into his touch. He lifts his shoulders up off the bed to tilt his head down, pressing a chaste kiss to your lips. He can feel you smile against his and he swears his heart is in his throat, hand sliding to hold the back of your head as he lets his fall back against the pillows. You settle back against his chest and Dazai cards his fingers through your hair as his mind spins.
Itās been two weeks since the event, and while the upcoming conflict with the House of the Dead and their allies has been eerily quiet, Dazai thinks it might be for the best because things with you have not been quiet. The past two weeks have been tense and strained, once the fog of the night the two of you spent together finally disappeared, the realization of your situation hit you hard.Ā
Itās been cycle after cycle of you shutting yourself off from himācurling up in the corner of his bedroom and staring out the window before sending yourself into a steep spiral of fear and paranoia. You havenāt dared to leave the headquarters in two weeks, even when Chuuya and Atsushi and half the Black Lizards offer to escort you, too scared to even step out of his apartment and go down to the lower floors. Sometimes you lash out at him, angry and accusatory; other times, you just cry, terrified sobs that rip Dazaiās heart right out of his chest, and he can only hold you until it passes. And it does pass, it always passes, and he gets a day or two with you like this, peaceful and pleasant. He can pretend that the two of you are just a normal couple in love with each other and not have to face reality.
He hasnāt been much better off. Every day that passes, the corners of the pages of the Book edge further into his vision. He knows itās comingāhis face-off against Dostoevsky, the first trial he has to face to ensure you can live in this universeāand he knows he canāt let himself falter even once or make a single mistake. Heās good at putting up a front around the executivesāalthough heās sure that Chuuya and Kouyou are realizing just how anxious Dazai really isābut he has to keep his hands beneath the table to hide the way his fingers tremble. He thought he would have more time to prepare for this, he doesnāt know why the timeline sped up so much in this life.
He tries to distract himself from the growing fear by keeping his attention focused on you because you need him right now. Desperately. Heās never seen you like this before. And itās his fault, he knows it. In most of the other universes, you never knew his enemies were hunting you down; and in the ones that you did know, youād been eased into a life with him already, youād known what you were getting into. He threw you into this life without any regard for how it might affect you, like tossing someone who doesnāt know how to swim into stormy waters.Ā Ā
Guilt claws at his throat again, as it always does when his mind drifts to what heās dragged you into, so he forces his mind back to the conversation at hand. Another welcome distraction from the anxiety, a way to keep his fear at bayātrying to figure out who your brother is, a mystery that he hasnāt solved in any other universe. Itās easier to actively avoid the creeping fear than to face it upfront, especially when heās not sure heāll be able to overcome it.
āWhy is that?ā he finally asks, and then after a moment adds, ā... Iām sorry.ā
āItās fine,ā you say, but he can hear the strain in your voice and Dazai understands that itās entirely not fine, and if your brother does happen to be part of the Port Mafia, Dazai is going to put him through the most excruciating and uncomfortable missions before forcing him back into your life because how dare he make you feel this way. āItās been like this for like six years now. He cut off contact with me, I donāt know why, he never explained. He still sends me money but I donāt care for any of that, I just want to see him.ā
Interesting. Six years ago. When he usually would have died in all of the other universes. Dazaiās mind spins as he tries to narrow it down. So many things happened that year. The Dragonās Head Conflict, the incident with Verlaine-
The incident with Verlaine.
No.
Dazai shifts a bit and you instantly shoot him a disgruntled look, the apologetic smile he gives you in return is only half-hearted. He ghosts his lips across the top of your head before wrapping an arm tighter around you, fingers rubbing absent circles against your bare skin.
Of all of the events that occurred after Dazai came in contact with the Book, the incident with Verlaine had been the one that changed the most. Dazai had gone out of his way to ensure that the Flags survived the incident so Chuuya would still have people after Dazai finished the final stage of his plan, just like how he made sure to put things in place for Atsushi and Kyouka, Gin, pushing Akutagawa to the Armed Detective Agency. Everything would fall into place after the final stage, everyone could have their mostly happy ending.
Everyone but him.
His mind drifts a bit at the thought of his original plan, the phases that heād enacted to ensure the preservation of this worldālong, happy lives for you and Odasaku. Dragging you into his life shattered that and he still hasnāt figured out how exactly he needs to adjust everything to account for this.
You brought me here. I need you here with me. Donāt go off somewhere I canāt follow
Your words ring through his head. His eyes slide shut and the reminder of Phase Five flashes before his eyes. He can feel a headache coming on already, his throat swelling with frustration. No. Nowās not the time to focus on this.Ā
The incident with Verlaine. The Flags. Is it possibleā¦?
It doesnāt necessarily have to be one of the Flags. Heās sure that dozens upon dozens of subordinates managed to live in this universe with the Flags still around, Doc especially, butterfly effect and all, but Dazai canāt help but hesitate, a gut feeling drawing him to them. You didnāt recognize Albatross or Piano Man, obviously it canāt be Lippmann. That only leaves Doc and Iceman. Doc doesnāt have a family, Dazai remembers the man mentioning it offhandedly after he was wrangled down into the infirmary for a checkup a few years ago, but Icemanā¦
āNah, Iceman aināt gonna be around this weekend, his kid sisterās graduating uni. Heās going to the ceremony. Hit me with whatever you needed him for, Iāll get it done.ā
Albatrossās words from a year and a half ago echo through Dazaiās head. He fully sits up this time, eyes widening, ignoring the way he jostles you around. You scowl at him and shift into a sitting position yourself but Dazai is already fumbling for his phone. You claim you havenāt seen your brother since you were sixteen, and Dazai supposes that doesnāt entirely fit in with the fact that if his theory is right, Iceman went to your graduation, but he also supposes that the man didnāt necessarily have to make himself known to you to attend your graduation.
What other pieces is he missing?
Dazai should have recognized Iceman in the picture on your wall, shouldnāt he have?Ā
Not necessarily, he thinksāyou and your brother had been young in the picture, no older than ten and fourteen, and Dazai doesnāt even deal personally with Iceman anyway. The man reports to Piano Man, and Piano Man reports to Dazai as the middle-man. He hardly sees Iceman more than once or twice a year, if even that.Ā
Andā¦
Oh.
Dazai exhales, realizing that Iceman being your brother might explain more things than just some oddities in this universe. His mind races as he tries to mentally flip through the pages of the Book, remembering some of the stranger universes out there. Some are so distinct from this one that there are hardly any similarities to this oneāuniverses where the world is still being torn apart by the Great War, universes where you and he had been born hundreds of years prior during an era of warring feudal lords, universes where the world is entirely flooded and universes where the world has become a wasteland.
But there are other universes so similar to this one, with just a few distinct differences, that Dazai struggles to understand what makes them turn out so outrageously different. Everything is functionally the same until the two of you are thirteen or fourteen, where itās as if the timeline abruptly branches off into countless routes for no apparent reason. Sometimes, he ends up with Odasaku rather than Mori, but in that same universe, you somehow end up with the Port Mafia. In other universes, he ends up with the government as a member of the Hunting Dogs, you end up with the Port Mafia too in that one. Sometimes you have an ability that manifests, sometimesālike in this universeāyou donāt.Ā
He never understood what causes the timelines to go down these routes when everything else is fundamentally the same. He assumed that he was somehow the root of it: it was a decision that he unwittingly made that caused the abrupt branching off of the timeline, but he was never entirely convinced of it because he couldnāt make sense of how him ending up somewhere other than the Mafia led to you joining the Mafia, or triggering the manifestation of your ability.
It makes a lot more sense if you already have a connection to the Mafia that he was unaware of.
That would leave your brother as the variable affecting where you end up, and whether or not your ability manifests. Not Dazai.
āWhatāre you doing?ā you complain, flopping back onto the bed and tugging at his shirt as he puts together the mystery thatās been plaguing him for almost seven years.
āGimme a second,ā Dazai murmurs, only half-listening as he shoots a text toward Piano Man, telling him to summon Iceman back to headquarters from where heās been dealing with a slippery target abroad for months, not bothering to wait for a response as he tosses his phone back onto his dresser and returns his attention to you, significantly more pleased than he was moments before.
The best way to test his theory is to drag Iceman back to base and see the manās reaction to you being here. Is it smart? Maybe not, but Dazai doesnāt really care.
āWhatās got you so happy all of a sudden?ā you ask, eyes narrowing a bit in suspicion.
Dazaiās lips tilt upward as he leans down, half-rolling on top of you as he ghosts his lips against your forehead, nose, and then your lips before resting his head on your chest. āIām spending my day with a beautiful woman.ā He tilts his face up to kiss your jaw, relishing in the giggle you let out. āOf course, Iām happy.ā
āYeah?ā you ask, nuzzling your face into his hair as you wrap your arms around him. Dazai thinks that if he died now, he would die in a state of blissātucked away in your arms with no threat of the outside world to weigh over him. You trace over the thin cotton shirt heās wearing, drawing absent patterns over with the tip of your finger, up his chest to his shoulder, trailing down his arm.
āMhm,ā he agrees, eyes fluttering shut momentarily as he basks in your touch. He glances back down again when he feels your finger brush over the bandages covering his forearms, hesitating for a moment.
He peers up at you through his lashes, watching the curious expression cross your face as you look down at them, not noticing that heās caught you staringāhe knows what youāre thinking, how could he not? Heād known this was going to come sooner or later, that one day youād wonder what was beneath the rest of the bandages. Youād never looked at him differently for it in any other life, but Dazai canāt help the lump that rises to his throat as he prepares for you to ask.
You donāt.
Instead, your gaze lifts back to his and you lean down to press your lips to his forehead. He hums lightly and tilts his head up, waiting to see if youāll say something, but you only lift your hand to brush your fingers through his hair.
āArenāt you going to ask?ā he murmurs, eyes sliding shut again as you trace your fingers over his face, drawing along the slope of his nose down to his lips.
āI donāt plan to, no,ā you say lightly, smiling as Dazai nips at your finger when you press it against his lips lightly.
āWhy not?ā he asks, gaze lidded as he looks up at you again. He almost frowns, wondering if you donāt want to see whatās beneath the bandages, but that would be ludicrous and makes him feel a bit insecure, so he waits for your answer instead.
āBecause I figure youāll show me on your own when youāre ready,ā you tell him and the lump returns to his throat, bigger this time as he catches sight of the soft expression on your face.
Heāll never get used to it, he thinks again, breathless.
āWhat if Iām never ready?ā Dazai questions quietly, watching your face carefully for a response.
Youāre entirely unbothered by the prospect.Ā
āI hope one day you will be, but if youāre not, thatās okay,ā you say as your arms tighten around him, leaning down to bury your face in his hair againāhe can feel you smile against the top of his head.
His lips part to respond but no words leave them. Instead, he lets out a sigh and takes one of your hands into his, smoothing his thumb over your palm. āWhat did I do to deserve you?ā he says more to himself than anything else as he lifts your hand to his lips so he can kiss your knuckles.
His eyes flutter shut for a second as he considers what to do, but before he can make a decision, he feels you shifting a bit behind him. He glances back at you, brows furrowing in confusion when he catches the sudden conflict plaguing your expression. He twists around to face you, lifting his hand to cup your cheek, frowning at the downcast look in your eyes as you lean into his touch.
āWhatās wrong?ā he asks you, wondering if he said something wrong but he has a feeling that itās something running deeper than that. He keeps his voice soft as he searches your eyes for an answer. You donāt respond at first, and Dazai feels significantly more concerned, shifting to his knees to kneel on the bed next to you, tilting your face to make you look at him. āTalk to me.ā
ā... I have orientation in a few days,ā you finally say and Dazai instantly knows what has you suddenly on edge, swallowing thickly. āFor school. On Friday. I canāt not go.ā
He runs his thumb along your cheekbone, hoping that the small smile on his face does not convey the nerves that eat at himāhe doesnāt need to stress you out any more than you already are. A part of him wants to curse himself for being so selfish; none of this was supposed to happen. You were supposed to live out your life happily without this weight hanging over you; you were supposed to go to school and graduate, not be so scared to leave the bedroom that you hardly even want to go anymore.
God, the guilt is suffocating; it takes all of Dazaiās self control to keep himself grounded here with you and not lose himself in regret.
āSounds exciting,ā Dazai hums, careful to keep his voice light. āYouāll meet all of your new classmates, you better not forget about me.ā
He finds a small victory in the way your eyes turn up slightly at his comment, but itās only brief, returning back to that downcast expression that makes Dazai feel sick to his stomach. He brushes his lips between your brows before pulling back to look at you again, the tips of his fingers running through your hair.
āIām scared,ā you admit softly, āwhat if-ā
āDonāt be,ā Dazai cuts you off, doesnāt even let you finish the what if thatās been haunting his thoughts since he came in contact with the Book all of those years ago. If you voice it out loud, heās scared that itāll shatter the dam thatās been holding back all of the fear threatening to consume him. āYou have nothing to be scared of. Nothing will happen to you.ā
āYou canāt promise that,ā you say, trying to look away, but he forces you to look at him again. His heart feels like itās in his throat when he sees the way your eyes have welled with tears, one spilling over to trickle down your cheekāhe leans down to kiss it away, trailing his lips up to the corner of your eye before hovering over you.
āI can,ā he corrects gently. He tells himself the same thing he told you the night he decided to see you againāhe has the knowledge, power, and resources, and Dazai is never as motivated when he has you as an incentive. Already, his mind is racing, making plans to get his own men into the building, trying to figure out what would be the best course of action to maybe have Chuuya pose as another enrolled student so he can keep someone close to you. āI can.ā
You donāt look convinced, your bottom lip wobbles as you look up at him doubtfully and Dazai is instantly leaning down to press his against yours. Softly. Gently. Itās an innocent kiss, a plea for you to trust him to protect you because he will protect you.
āDo you trust me?ā he asks and then falters instantly, reminded of the argument the two of you had two weeks ago. He amends the question and instead asks, āDo you trust me to keep you safe?ā
You stare at him for a moment and for a terrible second, Dazai thinks you might be about to say no, but after what feels like an eternity, you nod, and Dazai lets out a breath that he didnāt even know he was holding. He has to go talk to Kouyou, and the Black Lizards, and Chuuya. He doesnāt give a fuck if he turns this into the Mafiaās biggest operation since the Dragonās Head Conflict, if thatās what it takes to keep you safe.Ā
Dostoevsky wonāt winānot this time.
When he comes back to the penthouse after spending nearly the whole day trying to work out plans for your orientation on Friday, he can already tell that youāre teetering off of the edge. Dazai lingers in the door frame for a moment, the corners of his lips turning down and all thoughts of the upcoming operation fizzling away as he lets out a soft puff of air, studying you.
Youāre sitting on the edge of the bed staring out the window blankly, hands sitting loosely in your lap. Youāre still wearing the pajamas heād left you in this morning, but there are stains on the front of itāhe wonders if you tried to cook something but gave up halfway, it would explain the sudden influx of dirty dishes in the sink.Ā
You look beautifulāyou always do, even when youāre littered with stains and half out of itābut you look so fragile that it makes Dazai sick to his stomach. Heās never seen you look so fragile before than he has the past two weeks. Youāve always been willful, the most fearless and headstrong person that Dazai has ever known. Seeing you like this because of him, nonetheless, breaks something in Dazai that he didnāt even know was still capable of being broken.
āIām back,ā he says quietly, so as to not startle you, but you donāt react to his words anyway.Ā
In fact, you donāt acknowledge his presence or even blink as he brushes his hand against your shoulder before coming to kneel in front of you, eyes searching your face. His throat tightens as he reaches up to cup your cheek and itās only then that your gaze tracks down to him, but he can tell from the distant look in your eyes that youāre probably not even really seeing him.
āWhatād you try to make earlier?ā he hums, resting his free hand on your knee, drawing absent circles over your skin.
You stare at him for a moment and when your lips part to respond, he can barely hold back the sigh of reliefāif youāre still responsive, maybe he can catch it before you steep down into your spiral, he just has to figure out how. He needs to distract you, obviously, drag you back from the ledge as youāve done for himānot himāso many times before.Ā
āā¦ Cupcakes,ā you finally tell him softly. āThey burned.ā
His lips curl upward into a smile, hand sliding up your thigh to grab your hand, lifting it to press a kiss upon your palm. āWe can try to make them together later, hm?ā he offers. āIāve never made them before.ā
ā... Okay,ā you respond quietly after a few seconds of silence, and Dazai considers it a wināor, well, he does until you start speaking again: āI donāt think I should go on Friday, Osamu. Maybe I should just unenrollā¦ at least until things calm down, then I can figure it out. Iāll just start later. Itās fine. A lot of people do it.ā
Dazaiās eyes slide shut. He holds your hand to his face and rests his forehead against your knucklesāthis time he canāt hold back the sigh that slips from his lips. This is his fault, he did this to you. In a world where youāre supposed to be free of the dark, fulfilling all of the dreams you couldnāt because of him in other lives, youāre too scared to even start school, wanting to drop out rather than step outside his penthouse.
God, what has he done?
He drops your hand back to your lap and looks back up to you, hand sliding from your cheek to the back of your head, fingers intertwining with your hair as he looks up at you. Your expression hardly shifts, watching him absently as you wait for a response, but he doesnāt know how to convince you yet so instead he gives you a soft smile that heās sure doesnāt meet his eyes, but he doesnāt think you notice in your distant state.Ā
āCome take a bath with me,ā he says, half a request, half a plea as he squeezes your thigh gently. āThen weāll talk, yeah?ā
You avert your gaze from his again, but you nod, so Dazai considers it another win. He stands up quickly, helping you to your feet before guiding you into the bathroom. Youād do this for him sometimes in the other universes; when he goes through really bad slumps and can barely bring himself to eat or move, youāll coax him out of bed and into the bathtub, bringing him a tray of breakfast and letting him rest against your chest as he soaks in the hot water and picks at his food. Sometimes it brings him out of the slumps, sometimes it doesnāt, but it never fails to make him feel less alone so he figures itās about time heās able to return the favor to you.Ā
He hums a familiar jaunty tune as he leans over to get the water running in the tubāhot, you always like the water just a bit less scalding than he usually has itābefore turning to you. He crosses the bathroom in three long steps, standing in front of where youāre still leaning against the counter. He cups your cheeks and purposely smushes them so he can lean down and place an obnoxious kiss right upon your squished lips. You donāt look amused by his dramatics, but your eyes are tracking him nowāanother win. Heās on a roll now, maybe heāll be able to pull you out of this before it spirals.
āLet me help you get undressed?ā he proposes, smiling as he lifts a finger to his cheek and waits for your response.Ā
āOkay,ā you agreeāa quicker response than the last āokay,ā a good sign.Ā
Dazai doesnāt waste time as he presses his lips to your forehead, fingers curling around the hem of your soft cotton shirt. He carefully pulls it up above your head, placing it on the counter behind you. Youāre not wearing a bra beneath it, so Dazai only lets his hands settle on your hips before he props his chin up on the top of your head.
He lets out a soft breath, eyes tracing the smooth skin of your back in the mirror before he lets them flutter shut. Just as heās about to kneel down and slip off your shorts and panties so he can get you in the tub, he feels your arms wrap around his waist, and oh. Dazaiās throat tightens as you lean your head against his chest and press your bare body against his clothed one; one of his arms curl around you, large palm splayed against your lower back, while the other cradles the back of your head.
Dazai would do anything for you. Build empires or burn them. Heād gift you the sun and the moon and the stars. He can feel your body trembling against his and he knows that heād rot in the depths of hell if it meant keeping you safe. Thereās no length he wouldnāt go to, no depths he wouldnāt stoop to. His arms tighten around you and he presses his lips back to the top of your head, letting out a shaky breath.
Fyodor Dostoevsky will die. Agatha Christie will die. Both of their organizations will burn. Anyone whoās a threat to youāwhether itās ten bodies or ten thousand, he doesnāt care.
āCāmon,ā he says softly, āletās get you in there.ā
He feels you nod against his chest and with much reluctance, his arms drop from where theyāre wrapped around you as he kneels in front of you. He kisses your navel as his fingers curl around the hem of your shorts; he pulls them down until theyāre loose on the floor around your ankles. When he scoops you into his arms, your eyes widen and he tosses you a playful wink before easing you down into the tub.
Once youāre mostly submerged in the water, you draw your knees to your chest and prop your chin on top of them, staring ahead. Whatever light had managed to return to your eyes fizzles out almost instantly and Dazai bites back a sigh, intent on getting into the tub with you and distracting you from the thoughts plaguing your mind. He slips off his jacket and drops it onto the floor, pulling off his tie haphazardly. He reaches up to unbutton his shirt and-
Oh.
Oh.
Dazai has made a fatal mistake.
His vision tunnels in on the bandages peeking out from the sleeve of his shirt, envisioning the mess of ridged scars that stain the skin beneath them. Slowly, his gaze draws back to you. To the tub. To the water. If he wants to get in with you then-
You donāt seem to notice his sudden predicament, too focused on whatever spot on the wall youāve been staring at since he set you down, but Dazai thinks that his world might be on the verge of collapse because he loves you, he does, but he doesnāt know if heās ready to take off the bandages. Not yet. Maybe the fear is irrational, maybe itās notāyouāve already done things in this universe that youāve never done in any other, and heās terrified that when you see the deep, ugly scars that litter his skin, youāll look at him differently.
Shit.
His eyes slide shut, trying to figure out what to do.
He could leave the bandages onāhe could, but theyāll become soggy and loose and theyāll probably slip off anyway, not to mention itāll irritate his skin. And heāll feel gross after. And heās sure youāll take notice of the fact that he wonāt even take the bandages off to take a bath with you. Heās evaded it pretty casually up until now and the conversation yesterday morning, but this would be so glaring that there would be no denying that heās actively trying to not let you see beneath the bandages. Yes, that is what heās doing, but he doesnāt need you to be aware of that, though distantly, he notes that you probably are already at this point.
Or he could justā¦ take them off. Heās going to eventually, he knows that; heās not going to hide his body from you forever, but he thought heād put it off for as long as possible. But maybe this is for the bestāit happening now. Him putting it off for as long as possible is exactly what he tried to do with telling you about his position in the Mafia and that obviously blew up in his faceānot only did it not happen on his own terms but it happened in the worst way possible. At least now, he can control the situation.
It is with great reluctance and severe anxiety that he finally starts unbuttoning his shirt. He fumbles a few times, fingers feeling extra clunky, but he pushes through because his comfort doesnāt matter right now, helping you does. He reminds himself of that over and over again. He can hardly even count the number of times that youāve put aside your own comfort for him in all of the other universes, even in this one; he shouldnāt even hesitate to do the same for you. His shirt hits the floor and Dazaiās heart leaps to his throat, the first plate of his armor shed. His pants are next, and Dazai feels sick with nerves as his fingers brush the pin holding the bandages of his left arm in place.
Just do it.
His fingers work to unfasten the pināhe tells himself that heās being ridiculous. That this is you. He wears his bandages like armor, a shield to hide himself from the rest of the world, but youāve always been exempt from the ārest of the world.ā Youāre you, the woman heās loved since he laid hands on the Book when he was fifteen, the only person in the world who has accepted him for all of the good and bad and-
āHow could I accept any of this?ā
Your words from two weeks ago ring through his head and Dazai freezes from where heās about to unwrap the bandages. Doubt sweeps through himāfear, cold and debilitating because he really doesnāt think he can handle your rejection. Not now, not ever, especially about this.
You wonāt reject him, he insists again and forces himself to continue, but instead of looking down at the scars that line his arm, deep and discolored, lumpy to the touchāgross, he thinks again, uglyāhe looks at you. Youāre still staring ahead, oblivious to his rising anxiety and Dazai uses it as motivation to keep unwinding the bandages, letting them fall to the ground carelessly.Ā
First, his arms, then the bandages around his calves and thighs, his abdomen and chest, and finally his neckāhe grimaces as his fingers graze the rough scar that circles his neck, one of the more prominent ones that mar his body, a reminder of his near-successful attempt at fifteen after he first got his hands on the Book and couldnāt cope with all of the knowledge of the different universes. With the knowledge of Odasaku. With the knowledge of you. He was fifteen. Lonely. In the worst mental state of his life, desperately searching for a reason to live and only finding more and more reasons why he should die. Heād found out he was just as isolated from the world in every other life as he was in this one, just as emptyāand that the only people who could fill the gaping hole in his chest died because of him in every other universe.Ā
He was fifteen. It had been too much.
Itās still too much.
His gaze tracks down to the floor again, a heavy feeling settling over him. Heās second-guessing himself again, heās feeling guilty again. Heās tired.
Heās so tired.
When he moves forward to join you in the tub, heās hardly present; his body is moving on autopilot and itās only when his toes dip into the hot waterāa few degrees short of his liking, but the perfect temperature for youāthat heās finally drawn back to reality. Heās already in motion, so he canāt stop himself from joining you in the tub, but he is very hyper-aware now of the scars on his body, making an active effort to not let them brush your skin so as to not draw attention to them.
Luckily, his tub is large enough that you can sit comfortably between his legs without being too squeezed between them, so the deep scars that are littered across his inner thighs are not necessarily pressed against your outer thighs. Butā¦ the scars on his chest and abdomen are not as easy to evade, nor are the ones that line his wrists. His fingers brush your shoulder from where he was about to pull you back to lay against him and wrap his arms around you, eyes fluttering shut.Ā
Thereās no way you wonāt notice them when you lay back.
The largest scar that mars his body runs from his shoulder to his opposite hipāhe doesnāt remember how he obtained it. It was from before he found himself in Moriās hands, and everything before his time with the Port Mafia is vague and blurry, if not entirely blank. Either way, itās deep and ridged, discolored. Gross. And thereās no way for you to lay against him without feeling it rough against your skin.
He barely withholds the sigh that nearly escapes his lips, but he forces himself to close his fingers around your shoulder to pull you into him. He reminds himself that your comfort comes before his insecurity, youāve put your own wellbeing to the side for him so many times beforeāit should not be so hard for him to do it once for you.
For better or for worse, you donāt react when your back lays flush against his chest. For better because you didnāt have an adverse reaction to feeling the worst of his scars against your bare skin. For worse because he thinks it might only be because youāre still half spiraling into a dissociative state. He presses his lips against your shoulder, wrapping his arms around your body, and instantly he flinches because he realizes that heās just rubbed the scars on his forearms right against you and that has seemed to catch your attention. For better or for worse.
Heās frozen when he feels you shift against him, head turning down toward where his arm is tucked against you. Heās angled it so that you canāt see them, hidden in the water and against your skin, but youāre undeterred and Dazai can hardly bring himself to breathe when he feels your fingers curl around his wrist, gently easing his arm off of you to cradle it between your hands like itās something fragile, turning over so you can look at scars that litter his skin.
He canāt see your face. A part of him is glad, still plagued with the terrible fear that youāre going to see the scars and be disgusted, but the larger part of him wants to know, wants to see you, wants to-
His breath hitches when you bring one finger to his skin. Soft, gentle, you trace your finger across the ridged lines. Dazaiās lips part to speak, he has the distinct urge to say something, to explain even though you havenāt spoken a word, but he doesnāt know how to explain the emptiness that has plagued him ever since he was a child, that only became even more exacerbated once he made contact with the Book. He doesnāt know how to explain that he was so desperate to feel something that he resorted to this to distract himself from the void. He doesnāt know how to explain that the only reason he never actually killed himself was because he knew he had to survive to ensure you and Odasakuās survival in this universe.Ā
But he doesnāt have to speak, because all of the air in his lungs whooshes right out of them when he feels you lift his arm up out of the water to your faceāyou brush your lips against the pulse point on his wrist before settling back against him, wrapping his arm back around you and covering his hands with your own.Ā
Dazaiās cheeks suddenly feel wetāit was a simple action, short and sweet, you didnāt even say anything, and he doesnāt know why it affects him the way it does. He should have expected this, right? Youāve never looked at his scars and found them off-putting, youāve always accepted him for how he is but-
āHow could I accept any of this?ā
āNo amount of time or charm would have made me accept this easily. Accept you easily.ā
Again, your words shatter his thoughts and Dazai has to force himself not to physically react. As if you can sense his distress, you shift in his arms a bit to tilt your head back to ghost your lips against his jawline before settling back against his chest, eyes fluttering shut. His arms tighten around you, heart steadying in pace to match yours. He rests forehead against the top of your head, shivering when he feels you nuzzle your face into his skin, nose brushing the wretched scar that mars his neck.
āOsamu,ā you finally say, voice soft. He hums in response, waiting for you to continue. āWhat I said the night of the eventā¦ā
Dazaiās throat spasms. He swallows thickly and tries to play off your words with another soft hum and a brush of his lips against your temple. Heās careful to keep his voice light as he speaks. āYou had every right to be upset, I-ā
āIā¦ have had a lot of time to think the past two weeks.ā You donāt even let him finish his sentence and Dazai is suddenly frozen, no air gets to his lungs as he waits for you to speak. āWhat I said that nightā¦ it doesnāt reflect how I actually feel. I said them in the heat of the moment.ā
āā¦ Yeah?ā Dazaiās voice is too raspy, too quiet, the vulnerability in the single word is so palpable that it almost makes him want to curl in on himself. Without his bandages, without his masks, he feels as if heās been stripped bare to his core, his rotted heart laying in your gentle hands, thumping erratically as he awaits your judgment.
āThe past few months Iāve spent with you have been the happiest Iāve been since my brother left,ā you admit, lacing your fingers with his. āNo matter what happens, I wouldnāt give this up for anything. If I could go back in time and redo all of this, Iād still choose to meet you that night at the club, and every time after that.ā
Heās grateful that youāre not looking up at him now. He stares ahead at the wall blankly, tears streaming steadily down his cheeks. His chest is warm, breath a bit shaky, and he thinks he might be holding you too tightly but you donāt complain.
āNothing will happen,ā Dazai promises you, voice cracking. āNothing.ā
āI know,ā you say quietly, and he can feel the small smile on your lips as you kiss his neck gently, right over his scar. āI trust you.ā
āIām so nervous,ā you laugh as you smooth out the dress shirt youāre wearing. Dazai watches as you keep glancing at yourself through the window of the elevator leading down to the first floor. He smiles to himself as he leans against the wall, observing you. āAre you sure I look okay? I donāt even know what the dress code is for this thing, they didnāt say in the email. What if people are just wearing jeans? Iāll look dumb all dressed up.ā
āYou look beautiful,ā Dazai murmurs, lifting his hand to tuck a stray strand of hair behind your ear. āYou worry too much.ā
āIām not the best at making friends,ā you say, voice quick and riddled with anxiety. Dazai raises an eyebrow, lips quirking up because he thinks that might be the silliest thing heās ever heard you say. āI hope I can at least find a few people to talk to. I hate going to events where I donāt know anyone. I wish you could come with me. What if they all hate me?ā
Dazai has an answer to that question, but he doesnāt think youāll like it, so instead he hums softly, fingers brushing your cheek and smiling lightly to himself as you lean into his touch. āI wish I could come with you too. If only to make sure you donāt forget about me when you find yourself surrounded by all your new friends.ā
Dazai wishes that he could tell you that youāre worrying over nothing. That in every other universe, you were quite literally the center of your class. Brilliant, beautiful, kind, Dazai sometimes struggled to get you away from people because you always had someone wanting to grab coffee with you. Struggled even more to understand why you wanted him when you could have any man of your choice. But he canāt say that, and heās definitely not going to be pleased if he suddenly loses all of his time with you to a bunch of undeserving nobodies, so he resigns himself to just making you feel better.
āDazai Osamu,ā you giggle as you turn your attention toward him. āNothing in this world would ever make me forget you.ā
Dazaiās cheeks heat up, lashes fluttering as he averts his gaze from you. You grin at him and hook your arms around his waist, tilting your head up to look at him. He leans down to press his lips against yours, letting out a pleased sigh against your lips when he feels you kiss him back, smiling against him.
Youāve been better the past few days, a bit more excited over starting school, spent all of yesterday trying on new clothes for him to pick out something to wear for today. Dazai, on the other hand, has been a nervous wreck, although heās been doing his best to ensure you donāt realize that.Ā
Everything has been put in placeāChuuya should be waiting at the train station already, Albatross will be driving you there, the Black Lizards are going to escort you into Tokyo, and Mishima offered to have his men do sweeps of the streets to scope out for any enemies before your arrival. As long as everything goes according to plan, itāll be fine. The riskiest part will be the train station with how busy it is, itāll be easy for you to get separated from your escorts, but so long as Chuuya gets to you, no one will be able to touch you.
āEverything will be fine,ā he unintentionally says out loud as he separates his lips from yours to kiss your forehead.
You look up at him, eyes searching his face for something, and he prays you canāt see his growing anxiety. Finally, you say without any doubt, āI know.ā
Dazai lets out a soft breath as his eyes slide shut, reaching out to intertwine your fingers with his as the elevator comes to a stop at the first floor. He leads you out of the elevator and across the vast lobby, various lower-ranked members still linger around the room, but much less than there usually is considering heās sent almost all of them out to ensure everything goes according to plan. For a moment, Dazaiās head throbs painfullyāthere are so many variables. He starts to question his decision of making this such a large operation but he knows that this is the only way.Ā
He knows Dostoevsky. He knows that heāll leap onto this opportunity. Keeping this a small, secret operation would do more harm than help when Dazai is sure that Dostoevsky is about to use the full force of the Three Deaths, the Pale Flame and the House of the Dead to make his move. Heād be shooting himself in the foot if he didnāt use all of his available resources to keep you safe.
āCan I ask a silly question?ā you suddenly ask, playing with his fingers as the two of you walk across the lobby.
āAsk away,ā he says.
āDo you think there are other universes out there?ā
Dazai almost laughs, but he refrains. āI do,ā he agrees, and then smiles a bit to himself, repeating words spoken to another him by a different you, a joke only heās privy to. āString theory, multiverse. I think the worldās a lot bigger than just ours.ā
āYeah?ā you ask, looking up at him, a soft expression on your face. āDo you think weāre together in all of them?āĀ
This time Dazai does laugh, squeezing your hand gently when you jolt in surprise, giving him a dirty look. āIām sure of it,ā he says, trying to push away the smile that keeps threatening to rise to his lips.Ā
Your smile softens at the edges, gaze averting from him, but before he can ask whatās wrong, you ask: āDo you think thereās maybe one where things arenāt so hard?ā
Dazai suddenly has no inclination to laugh, smile falling and throat swelling. He doesnāt know how to respond to that, but luckily, he doesnāt have to.
Kouyou and Piano Man are waiting at the entrance of the building, both having remained behind to guard him while most of the Mafiaās other forces are elsewhere. Kouyou doesnāt look pleased, Dazai can see it in the way her brows are furrowed and her lips are tight, but Piano Man still has the same easygoing expression on his face that he always has, gaze focused on you.
āLippmann told me to pass along his regards,ā Piano Man sighs. āHeās been lamenting all morning not being able to be here himself to send you off. The struggles of celebrity life, I suppose.ā
You laugh. Dazai can tell from the way your lashes flutter that youāre flustered by the comment. āItās not a big deal, really. Itās only orientation. Iāll be back in a few hours.ā
āItās exciting though,ā Piano Man sighs whimsically. āWe never have normal things to be excited about around here. Itās only ever bloodbath after bloodbath. Itās a nice change of pace.ā
Dazaiās smile tightens and thins, eye twitching at Piano Manās blase reminder of their occupation, noticing how you cringe a bit. Piano Man catches wind of Dazaiās irritation and his casual smile widens a bit.
āSorry,ā Piano Man hums, sounding not at all sorry and entirely amused. āBut honestly, if you think this is bad, wait until your graduation. Iceman didnāt let any of us attend his kid sisterās graduation, weāve all been dying to see what oneās like. Iām sure Lippmann and Albatross are already plotting out some type of party.ā
āI havenāt even started yet,ā you complain, but you look a bit giddy and Dazai canāt help but let his gaze linger on your soft smile, one rising to his own lips as he observes you. āItās so far out. Itās a three year program.ā
āI think they plan on making it the grandest event of the year, so itās never too early to start planning,ā Piano Man says easily, tossing you a wink before focusing his gaze on Dazai. āSpeaking of Iceman, heās on the way back now. Should be back in Yokohama in the next hour or so. Are you going to deign us with the reasoning as to why heās been called back so abruptly?ā
āNope,ā Dazai says dismissively, letting go of your hand to press his hand to the small of your back, leading you out of the building and toward the sleek, black car waiting for you.
Albatross instantly is rolling down the window, grinning wildly. āThere ya are, doll. Cāmon, letās get out of here. We gotta make it to the train in ten.ā
You suddenly look a bit nervous, turning back to look at Dazai as Tachihara steps out of the car and holds the door open for you to slide in the middle seat between him and Hirotsu. Dazai tilts his head, questioning as he lifts his hands to cup your cheeks gently. āWhatās wrong?ā
āNothing,ā you say with a sigh. āI just wish you could come.ā
Dazai leans in to kiss your forehead one last time, hands settling on your hips, ignoring all of the gazes of his subordinates watching the two of you. āI know, I do too.ā
Dazai thinks that the next six hours are going to be the worst of his life, only able to sit back in the meeting room with Kouyou and Piano Man and watch the CCTV, unable to do anything if something happens to go wrong.
āStay with Hirotsu and Tachihara,ā he finally tells you, voice taking a more serious tone. āTheyāll stick with you the whole time. Chuuya is at the station already, went early to scope things out, heās going to meet you there.ā
āMkay,ā you agree, giving him one last long look before making your way into the car.
Tachihara nods deeply at Dazai before entering the car and shutting it behind him. Dazai feels a weight on his chest as soon as youāre out of sight, and he stands there waiting for the car to pull off.
It doesnāt.
After a few moments, the window rolls down, and Dazai watches fondly as you lean over Tachihara to prop yourself outside of it.
āIāll see you later,ā you say, leaning out the window of the car with a soft smile. For the first time in weeks, you look alive. Your eyes are shining, your lips curved upward, and Dazai falls in love with you all over again. The smile on your lips takes a more teasing edge as you push yourself out the window a bit more to grab his tie and drag him closer so you can brush your lips against his and whisper, āI love you.ā
Dazaiās eyes shoot open, lips parting to speak but no words leave them, your words leave him caught off guard and dizzy, hardly even registering in his head. You let out a giggle and before he can even think of formulating a response, you let yourself fall back into the car, urging Albatross to start driving already.Ā
āTo think Iād ever see the day that the infamous Demon Prodigy is ever rendered lovesick,ā Kouyou hums, fanning herself as she watches Dazai curiously. āYouāre actually happy now, arenāt you?āĀ
āRefreshing, isnāt it?ā Piano Man sighs. āNow, we donāt have to worry about being shot in the head if he has a sudden mood swing.ā
Dazai looks to the side to give Piano Man a look so withering that it has him instantly giggling to himself.
āOr maybe we do,ā he sings, retracting his words. āCome, letās go back inside. Itās gross out today.ā
Piano Man instantly starts making his way back into the building. Dazai sighs as he casts one last long look to where the car is disappearing around the bend in the direction of the train station, gaze lingering before he turns his attention back to Kouyou, whoās still watching him with a contemplative look. Dazai is suddenly reminded of her late lover, who the old boss had killed after Kouyou tried to escape with him, and Dazai wonders if sheās feeling bitter.
As if she can hear his train of thought, she shakes her head and says, āIām glad youāve found someone, boy.ā Then hesitates before adding, āFor all of our sakes, I hope it lasts.ā
Dazai doesnāt respond to that. Instead, he frowns and turns to make his way inside, but he doesnāt get more than a few steps before heās freezing midstep, the sound of a familiar engine roaring down the street in the direction of the main tower reaching his ears. At once, everything tunnels around him, vision blurring and body stiffening. He canāt even bring himself to turn around. Distantly, he hears Kouyou asking him whatās wrong, reaching out to touch his shoulder.
He swears that his bones creak and ache as he physically forces himself to look over his shoulder, unfocused vision falling upon a familiar head of fiery red hair skidding to a stop in front of the building. Chuuya doesnāt even bother to turn his motorcycle off or prop it up, it thuds hard against the ground, metal screeching against the pavement as he rushes toward them.
āChuuya,ā Kouyou asks, as confused and caught off guard as Dazai feels. āWhat are you-ā
āGet him inside,ā Chuuya shouts. āGet him inside now.ā
āWhy are you here?ā Dazai speaks the words so quietly that he doesnāt think anybody hears him. He feels Kouyou grab his wrist, Chuuya reaches them and pushes Dazai from behind, but their touches only feel like faint tingles. His chest suddenly feels cold, numbness spreading from his core to his limbs. āWhy are you here?ā
āTolstoy just blew up our main port, Dazai,ā Chuuya hisses, and just before Dazaiās shoved into the safety of the building, a bullet whizzes past his head, lodging into the sign behind him. Only a graze, but it stings, and Dazai can feel the blood seeping through the bandages of his left eye, sticky and uncomfortable. āThis is happening now. I thought I could make it before they left. All cell lines are fucking down. That rat bastard Dostoevsky did something.ā
No, Dazai thinks, head twisting to the side to look back toward the road you disappeared down with Albatross, Tachihara and Hirotsu, but before he can even force any words from his lips, heās pushed into the building, listening as Chuuya gives sharp orders to immediately lock it down.
Dazai shakes his spinning head, body on autopilot as heās ushered to the elevator and up to the most protected floor of the building. He tells himself to think, that now is not the time for him to start slipping up, for him to freeze. Youāre out thereāin dangerāhe has to think, he canāt afford to make a single mistake.Ā
āYou have to go. Chuuya, youāre supposed to be at the station,ā Dazai says, finally focusing his attention on the one person who is not supposed to be here. The one person he trusted to protect you.Ā
āYouāve sent three quarters of our forces out on a protection detail for her. Sheāll be fine,ā Chuuya spits, eyes wild as he turns to face Dazai. āYouāre here in this building alone with a handful of men, Ane-san and Piano Man. Youāre the one in danger right now. I told youāyour head is mine to take one day. Iām not fuckinā letting you go off and get yourself killed because youāre hyper-focused on your girl.ā
āGet to the train station,ā Dazai repeats, voice low and cold and entirely too steady compared to the way his mind is falling apart.
Itās happening.
Itās happening.
He knew this was going to happen. He knew it. He knew this was coming. He knew Dostoevsky would take this opportunity to make his move, thatās why he had everything planned so carefully. Thatās why he sent everyone out. Thatās why Chuuya was supposed to be with you, because Dazai isnāt Dostoevskyās target. He never is. You are.
Chuuya ignores him, stepping into the executive meeting room. Dazaiās blood pressure spikes. Fear begins spreading through him, cold and debilitating. The mindkiller. He needs to focus, he canāt let himself freeze up. Not now.
āChuuya,ā Dazai says. āThatās a direct order. Go back to the train station now.ā
At that, Chuuya finally turns a furious look into him. āMe not being there isnāt going to make a difference. Me not being here might. Youāre all but fucking defenseless and Tolstoy and Nabokov are coming now. We donāt have time to argue about this. Hirotsu and Tachihara, Atsushi and Kyouka, all of the fuckinā Black Lizardsātheyāre all with her or at the train station, sheāll be fine.ā
If Dazai was any less riddled with fear and rage, he might laugh or maybe even cry, or bothāhe feels close to hysterics, reallyābecause of course now, of all times, is when Chuuya decides to grow a fucking brain for himself.Ā
āAnd if youāre wrong?ā Dazai doesnāt even want to speak those words, but Chuuya leaves him no choice. āIf she dies because the dog thought himself smarter than the master? What then, Chuuya?ā
Chuuya all but snarls at him, taking a step forward, but before he can say anything else, Kouyou clears her throat.
āBoys,ā she calls quietly, eyes trained on one of the screens streaming the cityās CCTV feeds
Dazai follows her gaze.
On the top left corner of the wall of screens, one of the live footage is flooded with staticāgray, shifting into a deep purple before a familiar symbol flashes onto it. The coldness in his chest spreads so quickly that Dazai almost shivers, dread anchoring his feet to the ground.
Dazai doesnāt have to look at the screen to know whatās coming next.Ā
Oda Sakunosuke is a patient man.
He is. He really is. Itās just that Ranpo Edogawa enjoys testing the boundaries of said patience. He bites back another sigh, watching as the manāman, he questionsācomplains loudly about an āentitled motherā who had the nerve to ask for his candy to calm her upset child down. Oda has half a mind to step away out of embarrassment, acutely aware of all of the eyes on them, but he knows that if he steps away even for a second, Ranpo is going to find himself lost and then Oda is going to have to track him down again.
Oda sighs, stuffing his hands in his pockets as he tilts his head up to look at the ceiling, listening to the announcements over the loudspeaker, signaling the arrival of the next train. Two minutes until it pulls into the station, an hour to get to Tokyoāgives him plenty of time to go back over the files for the mission. Should be a quick in-and-out case, probably wonāt even have to stay the night in the city; a string of ability-user murders in Tokyo that have the TMPD in shambles trying to figure out, so they reached out to the Agency to come take care of it.
Oda doubts itāll take more than half a minute for Ranpo to put the pieces together once given the known evidence by the TMPD, but the issue will be actually getting the ability user in custody. From what Ranpo theorizes, he has some type of invisibility ability that makes him slippery.Ā
With Oda there, itāll be an easy grabāwith his ability, speed and reflexes, few people can outmaneuver himābut itās just a matter of when he decides to show himself.
Oda frowns when he notices that Ranpo suddenly stopped rambling, gaze cutting to make sure that he didnāt wander off again, but heās hardly able to turn his head halfway to the side before his ability is activated. Everything blurs out around him, watching as a girl a few years younger than himāpanicked and not looking where sheās goingācrashes right into Oda while heās already off-balanced reaching for Ranpo, sending the both of them hurdling over the edge of the platform and into the tracks just as the bullet train comes barreling into the station.
Odaās jaw tightens as heās flung back into reality, surroundings reappearing. His head snaps over to where the girl had appeared from and he catches sight of you just as youāre about to throw yourself out of the crowd, eyes wild and anxious. He watches you trip, hands darting out to steady you before you crash into him; you look up at him, eyes wide and a bit starstruck, lips parting to speak but no words leave them.
āAre you okay?ā he asks, voice a low monotone as he helps you stand back up straight on your own feet. His head tilts to the side curiously as he watches the way you stand a bit closer to him, eyes peering around as if youāre reaching for someone. āHm?ā
āOh!ā you suddenly say, looking up at him with a wobbly smile. āIām sorry. Sorry. That was so rude of me. Iā¦ got separated from my friends. Itās really busy today, isnāt it? Itās not usually so busy.ā
Oda hums, looking around curiously. It is a bit busier than it usually isāFriday trains are usually busy, but midday like this, people are usually at work. The late night trains are the ones typically packed and impossible to get on, people leaving from work and traveling for the weekend. Todayās not a holiday either, as far as heās aware.
āIt is, isnāt it?ā Oda says, scanning the crowd once more before letting his gaze settle back on you. āYou look rattled, is everything okay?ā
Your smile wavers at the edges, and Oda frowns, eyes trailing over to Ranpo, whoās already frowning, green eyes squinted and trained on you.
āIām justā¦ not used to traveling alone! Iām nervous,ā you answer, a blatant lie, but you donāt seem like a threat. In fact, you seem more scared than anything else. āI want to find my friends.ā
āIs someone bothering you?ā Oda asks carefully.
You hesitate, smile straining. Your eyes flicker around again, seeking someone out and Oda can see the despair in them when you donāt find whoever youāre looking for.Ā
āIām okay,ā you say finally, nodding. āIām trying to get to Tokyo. I have orientation today for grad school. I donāt like traveling alone.ā
Oda tilts his head to the side, he takes a step closer to Ranpo than you as an experiment, watching as you immediately match his step, sticking close to him as you continue seeking out your āfriends.ā You donāt seem like a threat, and his ability has yet to be triggered, but it wouldnāt be the first time underground organizations use civilians as decoys to set up traps for the Agency. He spares another look at Ranpo, knowing the man mustāve figured out whatever is going on, only to find him staring at you with a tight jaw and an uneasy expression.
āWhat school are you attending?ā Oda asks in an attempt to calm your nerves and hopefully get some answers out of you.Ā
You look at him, a bit more clarity in your eyes and smile more steady as you say. āWaseda,ā you say, brighter now, more relaxed. āTheir school of political science.ā
āYou tryna go into politics?ā Oda asks curiously.
You nod. āOne day, hopefully,ā you say with an easy smile before giving him your name. āWhatās your name?ā
āOda Sakunosuke,ā he greets. āNice to meet you.ā
āYouāre heading to Tokyo too?ā you ask curiously, and Oda doesnāt sense any ill intent behind the question so he answers.
āYes,ā he says. āGoing there for work.āĀ
āOh? What do you do for work?ā
Oda pauses for a moment, choosing his words carefully on the off-chance this is some sort of setup, before saying: āIām trying to write a novel.ā
You light up. āReally?ā you ask, delighted. āThatās so impressive, what about?ā
āā¦ Humans. The human experience,ā Oda answers, glancing back at Ranpo again with furrowed brows, but the man hardly budges, gaze pinned on you.
āOh yeah?ā you ask, the smile on your lips becomes a bit teasing. Oda finds his own lips twitching up in amusement. āWhatās your take on the human experience then, Oda Sakunosuke? Will your story have a happy ending?ā
āI havenāt decided yet,ā he tells you honestly, and then tilts his head to the side and asks curiously, āHow would you end it?ā
You click your tongue as if to chide him. āShame on you, Oda Sakunosuke, trying to poach ideas from broke grad students,ā you say, voice taking a dramatic lilt, but thereās a light to your eyes that hadnāt been there before, so Oda thinks his plan at least partially worked.
āAlmost grad students,ā Oda corrects, matching your tone as he lets his eyes drift around again, trying to pinpoint what exactly had you so frightened before running into him. āTake pity on an old man plagued with writerās block, wonāt you?ā
āI suppose I can grace you with my boundless wisdom,ā you quip, and Oda snorts to himself, eyes drifting back down to you as you grin up at him. After a few moments, your smile falls a bit. āI think a happy ending is nice to imagineā¦ We like to indulge in such fantasies because real life is never so easy. I think if youāre going for an accurate telling of the human experience, a bittersweet ending would be more realistic.ā
āBittersweet?ā Oda questions.
āBittersweet,ā you agree. āI think many people die content, or even happyā¦ I donāt think many people die without regrets. So, I think a story on an accurate telling of the human experience should have a bittersweet ending to reflect that.ā
āHm,ā Oda hums, considering you in a new light now, the way your eyes are a bit sadder, the smile on your lips soft on the edges. He finds himself far more into this conversation than he expected to be, so absorbed that he hardly even realized that the train has finally pulled into the station. āWhat about you, then? Do you think youāll die with regrets?ā
āWhoās to say?ā You shrug with another bright smile. āI think if I were to die right now, Iād die with one regret. But Iād be happy.ā
āOnly one?ā
āOnly one,ā you confirm. āIā¦ wish Iād met someone sooner. Thatās all. What about you, Oda Sakunosuke? If you died right now, would you die with regrets?ā
āCountless,ā Oda says quietly. ā... But I think I would also be happy.ā
āSee.ā You wink. āBittersweet.ā
Odaās lips flicker up into a ghost of a smile, lips parting to speak, but suddenly someone is calling your name frantically, loudly from across the train platform. You light up, head twisting in that direction and Oda follows your gaze to where a young man with short orange hair is waving his hand, perched up on a garbage can, looking around for you.
āThatās one of my friends,ā you say, looking relieved. āIām going to head over to him. It was nice meeting you, Oda Sakunosuke.ā
āNice meeting you too,ā he replies.
You toss him another wide smile before turning to leave, but before you can even take the first step, Ranpo finally moves, fingers curling around your wrist to stop you in place. Oda looks down at him, alarmed, and you look back, surprised.
āYou shouldā¦ be careful,ā Ranpo tells you, more serious than Oda has ever seen him before, and Oda feels a sinking feeling in his gut as Ranpo lets go of your wrist.
You look a bit disturbed, but you nod. āI-I will. Thank you.ā
āWhat was that?ā Oda asks, voice low and concerned as he looks down at Ranpo, whose brows are still furrowed. He still looks uncertain, and Oda doesnāt think heās ever seen Ranpo Edogawa uncertain before.
Dread weighs heavily on Odaās chest, his gaze turns back to where youāve started to quickly make your way across the platform along the yellow line in the direction of your friend, who has finally caught sight of you and is rushing toward you, looking too panicked for someone whoād just found someone they lost.
āSomething is wrong,ā Oda murmurs more to himself than Ranpo, and at once, he activates his ability.
The world slows and grays out around him, but his gaze remains focused on you. He watches.Ā
One second passes, you take another step forward, your friend is still too far away.Ā
Another second passes, another step forward.Ā
A third second, and something is shimmering right next to you, a gold circle to your left, swirling with patternsāan ability.
A fourth second passes, and you turn, eyes wide and fear painted on your face as a gloved hand darts from the circle and wraps around your wrist; your friend reaches down to his waistband, revealing the gun strapped to his side.Ā
A fifth second passes, and youāre gone.Ā
His ability fades away, leaving him back reeling in reality, ready to act on what heād seen. He rushes forward, heart racing in his chest, and he can hear Ranpo giving chase after him.
One second passesāyouāre still too far away, youāve made it across half of the platform already, Oda knows he wonāt get to you in time, but he tries anyway.
Another second passesāRanpo is yelling for him, Oda ignores him.Ā
A third second passesāthe swirling gold circle appears to your left, and Oda knows that itās too late.
Oda Sakunosuke is fast, but this time, he is not fast enough.
Chuuya knows that this is his fault.
The sickening scene taking place on the screens set up in the executive meeting room has his stomach turning inside out. He has to manually force himself to breathe, slow and steady, because if he doesnāt, he wonāt get any air to his lungs. Next to him, Kouyou stands stiffly, gaze trained on the damning video and on his other side, Piano Man looks resigned, head turned to the side, attention focused on the blacked out windows looking over the city.Ā
Chuuya canāt see Dazaiās expression from where heās standing, and heās glad for it.Ā
Youāre sitting at a table with Dostoevsky. Itās a small, square table in an equally small, unassuming room. Tiled walls, a thick steel door, no windowsāitās an abandoned office room down in the lower floors of the metro, emptied out besides the table, two seats, and you and Dostoevsky.
A small room. Unassuming. Enclosed and suffocatingly confined. Cold and damp. There is no sun, no warmth, and no life.
Not a place where anyone should die, much less someone as bright as you.
āAh, there we go!ā Dostoevsky smiles as if this is all some big game to him and Chuuyaās temper spikes, blood simmering in his veins and eye twitching as he glares at the Russian. āThe cameras should now be connected.ā
Chuuya did not hold you in high regard for a long time. He thought you were a pretty face, but more than that, you were a distraction. You showed up one day and suddenly Dazai couldnāt focus on anything but you. He evaded important meetings, and the ones that he attended were spent either zoning out or tapping away at his phone talking to you. It left Chuuya as the one to pick up the slack, so yeah, he certainly did not hold you in high regard, and heās not entirely sure when it began to change.
Or, maybe thatās a lie.
He thinks back to the day he ran into you coming out of the elevator, when you dragged him around half of the city looking for a very particular brand of white chocolate for whatever sugary concoction you wanted to make Dazai; and the way you pouted and begged and pleaded with him to try some when you make it for Dazai to the point that he wanted to agree, if Dazai wouldnāt have tried to blow his head off for intruding on his time with you.Ā
He thinks thatās when his view on you started to shift, because itās not often that Chuuya is treated like an actual human being, a twenty-two year old with a love for fine wine and music, instead of the mafia executive he is, a weapon of war that can bring down nations. As irritated as he was having to take time out of his day to babysit Dazaiās new plaything, he found you made for good conversation and that it was nice talking about things other than missions, politics and violence.Ā
You like talking about music with him and you ramble a lot about conspiracy theories and historyāhe thinks heās learned more about the classical era of Europe and the Sengoku period the past few weeks joining you on outings than heās learned in his entire life. Chuuya thinks you might be the first real friend heās made since the Flags. You have more life in you than anyone Chuuya has ever met before, and Chuuya thinks itās fucking sick that youāll be drained of it by the likes of a soulless bastard like Dostoevsky.Ā
Chuuya also thinks, again, that this is entirely his fault.
āI had a nice talk with your lover, Dazai,ā Dostoevsky says with a facetious smile. āSheās quite enchanting. Itās a shame that she ended up with the likes of you.ā
Chuuya thought heād be able to make it in time. He really thought he did. He thought heād be fast enough to get back before you took off with Albatross, Tachihara and Hirotsu; he thought heād be able to drag you with him and Dazai, lock the two of you up in the most well-protected room in the headquarters to wait out the assault of Dostoevskyās tripartite alliance; he can still hear the gunfire now as they bombard the lower floors of the building. Chuuya should be down there helping his subordinates but he canāt bring himself to move, staring at what his decision had caused with a heavy heart and more guilt than his mind can come to terms with. It was never his intention to leave you out there to die.Ā
He wouldnāt do that to you.
He wouldnāt do that to Dazai. No matter how much he canāt stand the asshole, he wouldnāt fucking do that.
āI have offered a deal to her, Dazai,ā Dostoevsky muses, head tilted to the side as he looks up at the camera in the corner of the room, thin fingers wrapped neatly around your wrist. āA fair exchange. But I leave it in her hands, not yours. Either way, I will get what I want.ā
How the hell does that work?Ā
Chuuya lets out a shaky breath, gaze flickering over to Kouyou, who stares at the screen with a tight expression, brows drawn together and lips cut downward. He can hardly bring himself to look at Dazai, but he forces himself to shift to the side, looking down to where Dazai is sitting in front of the wall of screens, eyes trained on where youāre sitting with Dostoevsky.
Dazaiās expression is eerily blank, more so than Chuuya has ever seen it before. It makes his throat swell, the air to his lungs catching in his windpipe. Heās seen Dazai distraught beforeāthe night on the roof years ago when he was drunk and screaming at Chuuya to just let him jump. Heās seen Dazai upset beforeāa few months after his sixteenth birthday, before the Dragonās Head Conflict commenced, when he returned to headquarters with an expression so haunted that Chuuya didnāt dare utter a single snarky word to him.
Heās never seen him like this before. Visible eye entirely void of life as if whatever part of him that had been reanimated by your arrival in his life has been killed off. As if he knows exactly whatās about to happen, as if he knows thereās no stopping it. But Chuuya can see the way the corner of Dazai is pinched, the way his face, while blank, is hard, and Chuuya knows Dazai well enough to know exactly what that means: that if thereās any chance of preventing this, Dazai is going to do whatever it takes.
āFair exchange is a funny way of saying Iāll die either way,ā you say softly. Your voice is bitter; youāre not looking at Dostoevsky or the camera, instead your gaze is set on the wall next to you, an unreadable expression on your face.Ā
Dostoevsky turns his attention back to you, eyes curious. āI am no liar, I gave you my word that youāll leave this room alive, myshka,ā Dostoevsky hums, lips curved up into an entertained smile. Chuuyaās eye twitches at the pet name. āGo on and tell Dazai what I ask for in exchangeā¦ I am quite curious to see how far heās willing to go for you.ā
How far?Ā
Even Chuuya knows the answer to that, and from the expression on Dostoevskyās face, he must know the answer too.
Ah, Chuuya realizes, his own question now answered. How does that work? Dostoevsky tells you the deal, and you have to make the decision of whether or not to tell Dazai. If you tell Dazai, thereās no lengths he wouldnāt go to fulfill Dostoevskyās demands if it means saving you. And Chuuya suddenly understands why Kouyou looks so grave, because thereās only one thing Dostoevsky wants: Yokohama and the Port Mafia out of his way. Dazai out of the way.Ā
Dazai would hand it all to him on a silver platter if it meant saving your life. Yokohama. The Port Mafia. Heād let Dostoevsky put a bullet through his head if it meant youād get to live.
āDazai,ā Kouyou begins, and her voice wavers. Chuuya doesnāt think heās ever heard Kouyouās voice waver in the seven years heās known her. āYou cannot-ā
Kouyou doesnāt finish her sentence. Doesnāt need to. They all know what sheās going to say, and Chuuya doubts that Dazai is listening anyway. He looks at Kouyou from the corner of his eye and she meets his gaze, a heavy expression on her face.
āYou gave me your word that Iād leave this room alive. What happens when I step outside?ā you ask with a sigh, looking back over to meet Dostoevskyās eyes. āYouāll get what you want from Dazai and kill me anyway.ā
You look tired and Chuuyaās stomach weighs down with guilt again. God, what the fuck has he done? You were on your way to your fucking grad school orientation and Chuuya signed your goddamn death warrant. You had so much ahead of you. You never belonged in this shitty world, and an instinctual part of Chuuya wants to curse Dazai for it, for dragging you into this and putting you into this situation.
But even as the thought crosses his mind, he tosses it away, because how the fuck is he supposed to condemn Dazai for clinging to the only damn thing that makes him happy as if Chuuya doesnāt do the same? His gaze turns back down to Dazai, frowning when he sees that heās no longer staring at the screen intently. Heās leaned back in his chair, still looking at the screen but his eyes are glazed over, as if heās not fully present.
As if heās given up.
āSo meticulous,ā Dostoevsky murmurs, he reaches to brush his knuckles against your cheek. The noise that Chuuya lets out is close to a snarl when he sees the way your lips tighten in disgust as you turn your face away from him only for him to pinch your chin between his fingers to force you to look at him. He glances down at Dazai, only to find that heās hardly even reacted to whatās happening. āYou are very intelligentā¦ I would have loved to have a woman like you at my side.ā
āPeople like you are fated to be alone, Fyodor Dostoevsky,ā you reply, lips curved down as you stare at him. āWhat a terrible fate. Iād always prefer a short and fulfilling life than a long and solitary one.ā
Your gaze draws back up to the camera as if youāre desperately trying to convey something to Dazai: I donāt regret this. If I had the choice, Iād do it all the same.
Chuuya doesnāt even think Dazai can understand it in the state heās in.
Chuuyaās stomach twists and turns, he has to take a step away, breathing in a shuddered breath as he pulls his hat off to run his fingers through his hair. He presses his hand to his face, trying to calm himself down, but his ears are ringing and the black coffee heād downed before heading over to the train station is threatening to come right up his throat.
And if youāre wrong?Ā
Dostoevskyās hand drops from your face, but his other remains wrapped around your wrist. He smiles as if telling a joke that only he understands. āMaybe in another universe you and I can work together.ā
Dazai jolts at the words and Chuuya looks at him again, watching the way he draws in a sharp, shuddered breath. Chuuyaās lips part. He doesnāt know if heās trying to speak or force himself to breathe, but his eyes land on Dazai just as the man finally breaks.
If she dies because the dog thought himself smarter than the master?
Itās brief. His expression crumbles and he quietly wheezes for air, hand flying to his chest as if trying to claw his own heart out, as if his brain has only finally registered what was happening. Kouyou and Piano Man are too focused on you and Dostoevsky to notice, but Chuuya thinks if he stares any longer at the screen, he might fall apart. His expression smooths out again immediately after it shatters, his eye takes that distant look again, as if heās totally separated himself from reality.
āIs that your decision then, myshka?ā Dostoevsky asks, voice deceptively soft. Chuuya has to drag his eyes back to the screen, teeth grinding together when Dostoevskyās hand leaves your wrist to cup your cheek, running his thumb over your bottom lip.Ā
To your credit, you donāt look scared and for a second, Chuuya doesnāt know what the fuck youāre doing. Dazai would do anything for you, give up anything, you have to know that. All you have to do is say what Dostoevsky wants and Dazai will do it no matter the cost. The irrational part of him, the one riddled with guilt and regret, almost wants you to just say what Dostoevsky wants, tell them and maybe they can figure something out, buy enough time to get you out of there.Ā
(Another part of him, deep down, knows that itās hopeless. With Dostoevskyās hand in contact with you, your fate is sealed. No one will get there fast enough to get you away from him before he can trigger his ability.)
Chuuya realizes, a bit dully, maybe you do know that and maybe thatās exactly why youāre not saying anything. Whatever Dostoevsky wants of Dazai is not something that you can allow him to give up.
Chuuya also realizes, chest sinking, that Dazai probably knows you well enough to know this too. To know that youād give up your life for his. He looks over at Dazai, the vacant look in his eye and the hopeless air about him. He knew this would happen the moment Chuuya showed back up on base, desperately trying to get him to go back to you.
A crash against the heavy metal door leading to the room that you and Dostoevsky are sitting in shocks Chuuya out of his thoughts, gaze snapping up as Dostoevsky lets out an exaggerated sigh.
āIt appears our time is up,ā Dostoevsky hums. āWhat a pity. I would have liked to talk with you more.ā
What then, Chuuya?
Chuuyaās vision spins as Atsushi and Kyouka burst into the room youāre being held in. Atsushi, half-transformed, throws himself at you, trying to get you away from Dostoevsky. Kyouka, with her cell to her ear, commands Demon Snow to sever Dostoevskyās hand from where heās touching you, trying to sever the physical connection between the two of you before he can activate his ability.Ā
Behind Dostoevsky, a gold swirl appears, a hand reaching out to grab his arm.
For a moment, Chuuyaās chest swells with hope, breath catching as watches raptly.
And they do it.Ā
Dostoevskyās expression twists as Demon Snow cuts through his elbow, severing his lower arm from the rest of his body, Atsushiās arms wrap around you as he tackles you away from the Russian onto the ground. Dostoevsky is dragged backward into the gold swirlāGogol, the teleportation abilityāand Kyouka and Atsushi focus their attention on you.
He watches with bated breath, waiting as Atsushi fumbles to shift you into a more comfortable position. He leans forward, eyes a bit wild and nails digging into the palms of his hands.
Kyouka kneels next to Atsushi, blue eyes wide, and Atsushiās expression crumbles as he finally turns you over in his lap. Chuuyaās breath slows, he takes a step back as he shakes his head.Ā
What then, Chuuya?
Blood stains the corner of your lips, eyes empty, body limp in Atsushiās arms. No one is faster than the triggering of an ability. Chuuya knew this. How many people have tried to kill him only to be thwarted in a split second by Tainted Sorrow? Still, he had allowed the hope to claw its way up into his chest, clinging to the thinnest thread that maybe, just maybe, his decision wonāt have cost you your life, and in an instant, that hope is stripped and Chuuya is forced to face the consequences of his actions.Ā
Next to Chuuya, Piano Man lets out a shaky breath, turning away from the screen and pacing over to the window. Kouyou makes a soft noise in the back of her throat, eyes sliding shut.
Chuuyaās eyes drag from the screen back down to Dazai. Dazai stares ahead blankly, eye so black and void of light that if Chuuya didnāt know any better, heād think he was staring into the eye of a corpse.Ā
Dostoevsky mightāve been your executioner, but Chuuya had been the judge to impose the death sentence.
Onto you, and onto Dazai.
You thought that you would be scared of dying.
Your mind is distant and dazed as you fall backward to the ground, familiar hands wrap around one of your arms and your waist as youāre dragged away from Dostoevsky. You taste iron in your mouth, red tints the corner of your vision, you donāt feel any pain but from the way your limbs become numb and heavy, you know whatās happening.
Maybe youāre just in shock, mind unable to comprehend whatās happening, but you donāt think thatās it. Youād known what was going to happen the moment you were pulled through that ability into this room, the moment Fyodor Dostoevsky told you the only way youād make it out of here alive is if Dazai offered his own life in exchange.
Dazai wouldāve done it. You know he would have. He wouldāve accepted the deal and laid his life down for yours in an instant, but you couldnāt let him do that. Heād face pushback from his executives, they might even lock him up to prevent him from following through, and then heād have to live with the fact that he had the chance to save you but failed.Ā
You couldnāt force that choice on him.
Your vision blurs and tunnels, eyes fluttering shut, but your body jolts as someone flips you around, hazy gaze focusing in on someone kneeling next to you, whoever is holding you in his lap. Two vaguely familiar wide swirls of violet, gold, and blue hover above you and your surroundings start to bleed out, the white tiles of the walls around you and the two people whoād barged into the room disappear, the violets and golds and blues spread across your vision, melding into a sunrise painted across the early morning sky.
The hand on your body falls limply to the ground next to you, the tips of your fingers brushing through soft white sand. Your head tilts to the side, something warm trickling down your cheek from the corner of your eye.Ā
You let out a weak breath, your vision clouds red and for a second, you swear thereās a figure laying next to youālips curved up into a small, sad smile, dark eyes soft as he reaches out to brush a strand of hair out of your face. Dazai wears tan instead of the black youāre used to, both eyes uncovered as admires you. You can feel the ghost of his touch against your skin, warm and familiar.
Osamuā¦Ā
You can hear the commotion around you, more people bursting into the room. You can feel your body weakening, but all you can think of is him.
Maybe in the next life.
Dazai doesnāt know where he is. Doesnāt know when he is. Doesnāt know what heās doing. Doesnāt know who heās with. Doesnāt know who he is.
Every step he takes, every second that passes, his surroundings become more and more indecipherable. He can hear the vague sounds of Chuuya, Kouyou and Piano Man talking around him but he canāt make out what theyāre saying or whatās going on. He finds himself walking but he feels like heās trudging through slush, as if time has slowed around him and heās trying to impossibly push through it.
āPull yourself together,ā Piano Man murmurs as Dazai mindlessly moves forward, unsure of where heās even being led to.Ā
Every time his eyes slide shut, heās faced with the image of you in that room with Dostoevsky, the sight of his fingers on your skin. He turns to look at Piano Man and for a moment, heās lost, wondering how a dead man is standing before him. His lips part to speak but no words leave them, the black walls fade into the vaguely familiar tan and brown walls of the Agency, the coat he wears lightens and Piano Manās face morphs into Yosano Akikoās as she tries to snap him out of the stunned stupor heās left in after finding your body in your apartment. Heād figured out Christieās plot, but heād been too late, and his mind had been entirely unable to come to terms with it. Because Dazai never fails, everyone relies on him to know what to do but-
But when it comes to you he just canāt win. No matter how hard he tries, heās never enough. Heās never quick enough. Never smart enough. Never enough.Ā
ā...ey, hey, boss, are you even listening?āĀ
Dazai blinks, gaze focusing back on Piano Man and he notices that heās in the elevator, heading down. Chuuya and Kouyou are watching him carefully but Chuuya doesnāt meet his eyes. Dazai realizes Piano Man must have said somethingāasked somethingābut he doesnāt know what.
āWeāre heading down to the first floor,ā Piano Man finally says again. āThe onslaught from Tolstoy and Nabakov ended-ā Of course it has, Dostoevsky got what he wanted. āAlbatross and-Albatross and the others are on the way backā¦ We must be there to meet them.ā
Dazai doesnāt respond. Doesnāt think heād be able to if he wanted to. His brain is slow, still hasnāt comprehended what happened, still doesnāt entirely know where he is. The pages of the Book keep piling around him, endless and suffocating. He jumps from one reality to the rest, each time seeing the same scene in different fonts. He sees Piano Man and Kouyou exchange a look with one another but Dazaiās gaze is already pointed ahead again, staring through the reflective surface of the elevator doors.
Dazai doesnāt even recognize himself.
They still talk around him but all of the words sound muffled and faraway, like heās underwater and theyāre speaking above the surface. As Dazai stares into the doors, he swears he can almost picture you standing next to him, tucked beneath his arm and leaning into his side as the two of you wait for the elevator to reach the first floor. You smile up at him, he watches it through the reflection, heart in his throat as you lean up on your tiptoes to brush your lips against his jaw and he swears he can feel the ghost of your lips, the warmth.
But then the elevator doors slide open and the illusion of you is shattered.
Dazaiās breath shakes as he forces himself forward but heās careful to keep his expression flat, ignoring the lines of subordinates already awaiting his arrival. They kneel as he walks past but Dazai hardly takes notice of them, eyes trained ahead.
And then-
And then Dazai sees it.
Hirotsu is holding you, your body is limp and lifeless. Dazai stops dead in his tracks. You look small in his arms and Dazai feels bile rise to the back of his throat, threatening to burst from his lips. Even from a distance, he can see the blood staining the corners of your lips and eyes, can see the way one of your arms dangle loosely from your body, can see how youāve been entirely drained of life by Dostoevsky.
He wants to move forward, wants to pull you in his arms and shield you from all of the prying eyes around you, hates the way everyone is staring at you, wants to scream and curse the gods above who play with human lives like theyāre some sort of game, who are laughing at Dazai for thinking he could get away with defying fate.
Most of all, heās tired, and he wants to be with you.
The crowds of subordinates whoāve gathered on the lower floor of the building whisper amongst themselves. Some of them, who havent seen you around the base with him, are trying to figure out who you are. Others, who know exactly who you are to Dazai, let out low murmurs as they watch Dazai carefully, waiting for some type of reaction from him. A few, likely those whoāve spoken to you personally, lower their heads in respect.
Dazai tries to make himself take another step forward, pull you away from Hirotsu into his arms, hold you close, stop them from taking you away, but his feet are rooted to the ground.
One voice rises above the whispering crowds.
āWhat the fuck?ā
Dazaiās gaze slides slowly to the side, watching as a vaguely familiar figure pushes to the front of the crowd, walking in the direction of you and Hirotsu. He blinks slowly, not recognizing who it is until Chuuya and Piano Man start moving toward him, both with furrowed brows and concerned words.
Ah, he realizes. Iceman.
Dazai had called him back to headquarters from abroadābut why? The cogs in his mind move slowly as he tries to remember why he brought Iceman back, why the man is having such an adverse reaction to the sight of-
To the sight of you.
Dazaiās eye shifts back to you, all of the air pushes out from his lungs when he notices the way your head has fallen to the side. Your eyes are shut but your face is tilted toward him and you look so-
You look so dead.
Everything around Dazai begins to tunnel and crumble. The buildings around him blurting into indistinct blobs and all of the crowds of his subordinates melding into the background. Icemanās arrival, Chuuya and Piano Man trying to settle him down, it all becomes white noise as Dazai stares at you blankly.
How did this happen?
Heād-
Heād done everything right, hadnāt he? Heād done everything to make sure you would be protected. Heād clawed his way to the position of boss, annihilated all of the Mafiaās enemies to ensure that Yokohama would be safe for you. Heād sacrificed everything, how did it still turn out like this?
The white noise, the buzz of people around him, it all slowly shifts to laughter. The sight of Hirotsu holding your body turns into Dazaiāa different Dazaiāhunched over your limp form screaming his throat raw in your apartment. It turns into him sprinting through knee deep water with Yosano Akiko at his heels to get to your lifeless form floating face down in the water of the same beach you met him at. It turns into Chuuya catapulting himself through the air, desperately trying to get to you as you fall because Dazai can do nothing but watchāhe fails. It turns into Mori stepping out of the hospital room he was treating you in, Dazai canāt hear what heās saying but he knowsāthen Mori turns into Fukuzawa, Fukuzawa into Ango, all the same grave expressions, all the same fate.Ā
It was never the Port Mafiaās enemies that were at fault for your death. Wasnāt Mimic or an affiliation with the Mafia, like it was for Odasaku. Wasnāt Dostoevsky. Wasnāt Christie.
It was Dazai.
Dazai is the reason you die in every universe.Ā
The only way for him to save you from your fate is to stay away from you, and he couldnāt even do that. The only chance for him to give you a normal lifeāa long lifeāsquandered because of his own selfishness.
The laughter gets louder, more manicāthey laughed at him when you stumbled into him at the bar, when he tried to stay away, when he gave in to meeting you again. They laugh louder now that things have played out exactly as they knew it would. Dazai danced along perfectly to their marionette strings, as they knew he would from the beginning.
Fate.Ā
Fatefatefatefatefatefatefatefatefatefatefatefate.
The word thatās haunted him since he was fifteen years old tears apart his mind, claws open his rotted heart from the dark crevice itās slipped into the past thirty minutes. His vision goes spotty and his head feels light. He knew better. He knew this would happen. He knew-
āThatās my sister.ā Again, Icemanās voice rises above the laughter, a broken gasp that jolts Dazai from his spiraling thoughts. āThatās my sisterāwhat the fuck?ā
Ah. Dazai suddenly remembers why he called Iceman back to headquarters. Remembers laying in bed with you a few mornings agoāyou were in his arms, warm and happy and alive, and Dazai was excited, figured out the mystery thatās been plaguing him for years. He put together who your brother was, wanted to give you the chance to see him again. Wanted to do something good for you.
And now-
Iceman whirls around, eye wild and expression feral as he focuses on Dazai. Dazai doesnāt know what Chuuya and Piano Man told him, but whatever it was has the man unhinged as he pushes Piano Man hard out of the way to throw himself at Dazai.
āWhat did you do?ā Iceman roars. āWhat did you do?ā
He reaches for the gun at his side, pulls it out and clicks off the safety in a split secondāquick and efficient, as expected of the Port Mafiaās best assassin. Around Dazai, other members of the mafia raise their guns in defense of the boss, Dazai only distantly has the mind to raise his hand to order them to lower their weapons.
Chuuya stops Iceman before he can steady the gun at Dazaiās head and pull the trigger. He wrangles the larger man to the ground, using his ability to keep him down, yelling at him to calm the fuck down and explain himself. Iceman clearly has no intention of doing that from the way he futilely tries to throw off Chuuya and go for his gun again.
Dazai watches absently until Kouyou ushers him back into the building, not even giving Dazai the chance to hold you one last time. His chest caves in as soon as youāre out of sight, breath weak and ragged. Kouyou pinches his arm hard.
āPull yourself together, boy,ā she warns. āYou cannot let them see you weak.ā
Dazai wishes that Iceman had pulled the trigger.
Iceman has never been a good brother.Ā
He was four years old when you came into his life, and when his mother tried to introduce him to his newborn sister, heād turned his nose up and pouted, upset at no longer being the only child.Ā
He was nine years old when his mother died, sacrificing herself to save a child in Motomachi Shopping Center when a drunk driver barreled down the sidewalk. When you tried to cling to him and cry, he pushed you away to mourn by himself, angry and grieving.
He was eleven years old when his father started to see his mother in you, taking out the bitterness he felt for her decision on you with cruel words and crueler hands when he would come home drunk after a long night of gambling away all of his money. A good brother would have stepped in to protect his little sister, but Iceman chose to turn a cheek and plug his ears when you would curl in bed at night and cry.
He was thirteen years old when he came home to you physically hurt for the first time, blood trickling down from a split lip as you curled in the corner of your shared room. Iceman had already started involving himself with the underworld by the point, so it only took a few sniffles and your fingers curling around his wrist for him to stay up all night, waiting for his father to fall asleep so he could press a pillow to his face, smothering him to death and leaving the two of you homeless without a dollar to your name.
He was fifteen years old when he officially joined the Port Mafia, desperate to get a roof over your head. Sixteen when he killed his second man. You never asked questions when he came home covered in blood and wounds, even though you definitely should have. He lied and told you heād joined an underground fighting ring to try to make some money for you. You took care of him in a way that he never did for you, patching up his wounds with an easy smile and tender hands.
He was eighteen when he met the rest of the Flags after making a name for himself as one of the Mafiaās best assassins. He stopped coming around as much, spending his time at bars with the Flags, afraid that one day youād figure out what heās been doing for money, afraid that you would start to see him as a monster instead of the brother you still loved for whatever god forsaken reason.
He was twenty when he cut you off. After his near death experience at the hands of Verlaine, Iceman realized his life was much too dangerous to keep you in it. To provide for you and give you the life you deserve, he had to abandon his name and leave you behind, otherwise you would forever be at risk of people trying to kill you to get to him.
The best thing Iceman ever did for you as an older brother was cutting you off to let you live a long, fulfilling life away from the dark. Away from him.
And for what?
Iceman sighs as he fumbles in his pocket for another cigarette, already on his second pack of the day. He tilts his head back against the tree heās leaning against, the muddy ground staining his pants. He lights the cigarette and takes a long drag, tilting his head down as a heavy feeling sweeps over him.
And for what?
Itās been two and a half weeks since he came back to Yokohama.
Two and a half weeks since your death.
Your death, the words still make him sick to his stomach, make him feel as if the world is collapsing around you. Iceman had always been sure of the two of you, heād be the one to go first. The thought of outliving youāhis little sister, the one person in the world heād sacrifice everything to protectāwas never even an option in his mind.
Heās spent just about every waking hour with you, trying to make up for the times he didnāt while you were still alive. Youād always hated the dark; he used to bitch and complain when the two of you shared a bedroom because you couldnāt sleep without a night light, and now he feels sick to his stomach thinking of you stuck out here in the dirt alone and in the dark.Ā
The Flags have tried to drag him away, Lippmann pleading with him to come inside and sleep and Piano Man trying to coax him back with promises of drinks and fine food, but Iceman refused to budge. Chuuya sometimes joins him, brings a nice bottle of wine, cracks it open and after three glasses, starts choking over air, apologizing and begging for forgivenessāsometimes to Iceman, sometimes in front of your headstone.Ā
Iceman enjoys their companyāhe doesābut he thinks he prefers to be alone with you.
Which, unfortunately, seems to be a rare occurrence.
He sighs as he hears leaves crunching on the path leading up to your grave, gaze drawing to the side. At first, he figures it must be Chuuya dragging himself back to your grave, ready for another round of drinks and regret, but he pauses when he recognizes the long black cloak and red scarf donning the figure making his way over to your grave.
His fingers twitch down to the gun holstered down to his side, resentment and anger simmering dangerously beneath the surface.
Dazai Osamu kneels in front of your grave for the first time since your death. He did not attend your funeral. Didnāt come to see you laid into the ground. Didnāt pay respects. Heās spent two and a half weeks holed up on the top floor of the centermost building of headquarters with only Chuuya and Kouyou as company.Ā
Iceman thinks he has some fucking nerve, being the reason that youāre six feet under and not even bothering to come see you.
His first reaction is to make himself known, rise to his feet and pull out his gunāan offense worthy of execution in the eyes of the rest of the Mafia, pulling a gun on its boss, but Icemanās self-preservation was thrown out the window the moment he came back to headquarters to see you dead in Hirotsuās arms and Dazai Osamu standing there like an emotionless statute as if he didnāt cause this.
But he hesitates when he sees the expression on Dazaiās face, lips trembling and visible eye glassy. Iceman doesnāt think heās ever seen the boss in such a sorry state beforeāhis bandages are yellowed and grimy as if he hasnāt changed them in weeks, his coat is wrinkled, scarf dirty, lips chapped and cracked. Dazai Osamu is a man that most people see as untouchable and unflappable, and even Iceman, riddled with grief and fury, canāt help but pause at the sight of him breaking.
āI thought I could stop it,ā Dazai breathes out. Iceman startles a bit, irrationally thinking that the man is talking to him, but settles down when he realizes that heās talking to you, eyes slid shut as he kneels before your headstone. āI tried so hard. I tried so hard to stop it.ā
Icemanās eyes lower at the sheer pain in Dazaiās voice, the hoarseness of grief that has his throat red and raw, has him stripped him bare to the bone. From where Iceman is sitting out of sight, he can see the way Dazaiās fingers are trembling in his lap, shoulders shaking.
āAll of this was for you,ā Dazaiās voice wavers as he speaks, cracking over his words. āAll of it was for you-I donāt-what am I supposed to do now? Shit. What do I do? Itās all gone to waste, I knew it. I knew I shouldnāt have-ā
The noise that escapes Dazaiās throat is more belonging of a wounded animal than of a human. He curls over at his waist, blunt nails digging into the marble of your headstone, forehead resting against the cool stone.Ā
Iceman squeezes his eyes shut, throat swollen, letting out a full body shiver at the sound. He forces himself to his feet, fingers enclosing around the grip of his gun, and makes his way over to where Dazai is kneeling. The man stiffens when he hears Iceman approach, straightening and tilting his head to the side to look at Iceman from the corner of his eye. His mouth dries a bit when he sees the tear streaking down Dazaiās pale skin.
āAre you here to kill me?ā Dazai asks, voice raspy and throat sore. Thereās a mocking edge to it that makes Icemanās jaw click, as if Dazai is purposely trying to antagonize him. āGo on then, I left Chuuya behind. Thereās no one to stop you this time.ā
āYou think you deserve to go see her already?ā Iceman asks coldly.
He stares down at Dazai, watching as the facade cracks at Icemanās words. The corner of Dazaiās lips twitch downward and his eye goes a bit hazy as it tracks back down to your headstone. He takes in another shuddered breath and Dazaiās shoulders finally slump over, lashes fluttering.
āI knew this would happen,ā Dazai finally croaks out, voice weak and wavering. Icemanās lips tightens at his words, flicking the safety off on his gun and pulling it from his holster. āI knew this would happen and I still sought her out.ā
āEven a blind person couldāve seen how this would turn out,ā Iceman spits out, pressing the muzzle of his gun to the back of Dazaiās head. He doesnāt even flinch, doesnāt react at all. A part of Iceman wonders if this is what he wantsāto be put out of his misery. āThis is on you.ā
āI know,ā Dazai says hoarsely. ā... I know.ā
Iceman knows that you loved Dazai Osamu for whatever fucked up reason. The same fucked up reason you probably still loved Iceman even after all of the bullshit that he did, and didnāt do, during your childhood. He forced Chuuya to get him the tape after heād calmed down, watched the way you sat there with Dostoevsky, accepting your fate. Heard that you were given a choice, and the choice you made. He hadnāt been able to understand it at firstāyouāve always been so full of life, excited for the future even at your lowest, he couldnāt fathom what couldāve possibly made you so accepting of death.
So he dug further, got Piano Man and Lippmann and Albatross roped up in his schemes. Heard the way you would act with Dazai, how happy you were and how happy he was. Forced Piano Man to get him tapes from around the base; he saw the way you looked at him and the way he looked at you.Ā
You loved Dazai Osamu, and Dazai Osamuāa man that everyone had been convinced was incapable of emotion, a demon without a heart or consciousāloved you.
He takes in the dark bag beneath Dazaiās tired eye, the glassiness and lack of life within them, the sickly pallor of his skin, and the dirtiness of his clothes. His nails bleed from where he dragged them against the marble of your headstone and he can see a murky redness staining his yellowed bandages, peeking out from where his coat rode up his arm.
Iceman has not been the only one grieving you.
āArenāt you going to kill me?ā Dazai finally rasps out. Less of a question, more of a beg, a far cry from the cold and brutal mafia boss that Iceman has come to know, and Iceman knows that Dazai Osamu died in the same moment you did, only a walking corpse remains in his place.
Iceman scoffs, holstering his gun. āNah,ā he says. āWhatever youāre doinā to yourself. Thatās worse than death.ā
āā¦oss. Boss.ā
Dazaiās gaze drags from the photo on his desk to where Chuuya has entered his office, tilting his head to the side as he waits for Chuuya to say whatever he came here to say. Chuuya hesitates and Dazaiās jaw tightens in annoyance. Heās been like this since you-
For three and a half weeks. Heās been like this for three and a half weeks. Constantly hovering, afraid to leave Dazai alone for too long. If Chuuya isnāt hovering, Kouyou is. Dazai can hardly get a moment alone and itās becoming increasingly hard to continue the preparation for phase five, the final part of his plan. Everything is set in place, if all goes according to plan, tomorrow morning will be the long awaited moment.Ā
In a little over twelve hours, heāll be able to be with you again at last.
Four hours until Atsushi is to go to the Armed Detective Agency with the files that will antagonize Akutagawa into attacking the Mafia headquarters. Dazai expects that by three in the morning, the Agency would have managed to fully infiltrate the building, and Atsushi and Akutagawa will be clashing on the roof of the headquarters.Ā
By dawn, itāll be time.
But one major obstacle remains.Ā
Dazaiās gaze draws back to Chuuya, whoās still standing in the door of his office, becoming increasingly more irritated by Dazaiās lack of a response. As long as Chuuya is around, Dazai is going to have trouble following through with the final step. The executive will do whatever it takes to prevent Dazaiās death, so Dazai needs to get him out of the way.
āChuuya,ā Dazai hums, āWh-ā
āWeāve captured Gogol.ā
Dazai halts, fingers pausing from where theyād been thrumming against the desk as he thought. His gaze sharpens as he tilts his head to the side, āIs that so?ā
Gogol. Gogol. The one who captured you, handed you to Dostoevsky on a silver platter. Dazai mightāve been the cause of your-
Dazai mightāve been the one at fault for all of this, but that doesnāt mean he can let your executioners get off scot-free. He rises to his feet, the pads of his fingers pressing into the dark wood of his desk. For a moment, he doesnāt move, his ears ring and his eyes slide shut. Dazai didnāt think heād get the chance to handle either of themāheād resigned himself to accepting that he would have to forfeit personal vengeance to ensure that at least Odasaku will be able to live out his life in this world.
But nowā¦
From the corner of his eye, Dazai swears he can see you barge into his office from his apartment, a wild smile on your face as you wave around the TV remote, claiming you found a good movie for the two of you to watch. Itās only for a split second, but Dazaiās heart leaps from his throat, breath catching. He hasnāt dared step foot in the apartment sinceā¦ everything happenedāitās too big now, too empty. Your coffee mug still sits on his kitchen table, clothes strewn across his room from where youād been having a fit trying to find the perfect outfit for orientation.
āDazai.ā
Chuuya speaks and the mirage of you is gone. Dazai lets out a heavy breath before shaking his head and making his way toward Chuuya. Neither of them speak again as they make their way into the elevatorātheyāve hardly had a full conversation with one another sinceā¦ since Chuuya chose to disobey ordersāheading down to the belly of the headquarters where Gogol will be held. Dazaiās mind spins, lashes fluttering as he thinks.
He knew that Dostoevsky would be well out of reach, that he would have to leave your justice for when the Russian makes his real move in the hands of Odasaku, Akutagawa and the Agency, in the hands of Chuuya, Iceman and Atsushi. Thereās no way that Dazai would be able to get his hands on the man in a timely manner, and Dazai canāt risk being in this world any longer than heās already been. The longer he remains, the more Odasaku is at risk of meeting the same fate you did, and then all Dazai has done and sacrificed over the past seven years would be for nought. The only chance he had to protect the two of you squandered because of his own selfishness and incapability.
But Gogol. He hadnāt dared hopeāDazai lost any semblance of hope the moment he saw Chuuya show up at the Port Mafia headquartersābut he couldnāt help but want.
Kouyou and Piano Man are already waiting in the torture chambers when Dazai and Chuuya finally arrive. Gogol has silver shackles around his wrists, military-grade ability nullifying cuffs that the Mafia had stolen from a government shipment a few months back, and when he sees Dazai, he laughs wildly as if heās just been told a hilarious joke.
āItās really you,ā Gogol cackles. āDostoy thought for sure youād have offed yourself by now.ā
Dazai hums, but otherwise doesnāt react to the words. He supposes that theyāre not too off the mark, Gogol is only unlucky in that he managed to get himself captured the day before itās meant to take place.
āAre you going to kill me?ā Gogol coos. āAvenge your pretty little thing? Not many people manage to catch Dostoyās attention, yāknow? I was so curious about her.ā
Dazai tilts his head to the side and smiles thinly, a cold one that makes Gogol look impossibly more entertained.
āI hear that you enjoy freedom,ā Dazai says more to himself than to Gogol, but finds a bit of sadistic pleasure in the way Gogol hesitates. āWhat makes you think Iād ever give you the mercy of death? The ultimate freedom?ā
Gogol does not respond, so Dazai continues, āSo long as you liveāand you will liveāyouāll never take another breath of fresh air or feel the wind against your skin ever again. My men will ensure you live to a ripe old age. They will feed you when you try to starve yourself, force water down your throat when you refuse to drink, theyāll heal you when you try to kill yourself to free yourself of this prison. For the rest of your life, until you rot of old age, youāll be caged in the basement of this building. A bird clipped of its wings, trapped forever behind gilded barsā¦ I think thatās quite the fitting fate for you.ā
Dazai relishes in the way that Gogol freezes at his words, but even that is not enough to heal the gaping wound in his chest caused by your absence. The pleasure is hollow, like the hole you left in him. Dazai is so tired, he just wants to get back to his office so he can finish finalizing the last step for the final phase.
He just wants to be with you.
Dazai turns to leave, motioning for Chuuya to join him, but as soon as he turns his back, Gogol is speaking again, letting out another manic laugh: āArenāt you curious as to what the deal was? I can tell you.ā
Dazai stills, Gogol laughs louder.Ā
āIt was a life for a life. Your life for hers. I thought Dostoy was crazy for it, I mean, who would think a random girlās life would be equal to that of the boss of the Port Mafia,ā Gogol snickers. āBut looking at you now?āĀ
Dazaiās jaw tightens, he looks over his shoulder as Gogol doubles over laughing and then says quietly, āHer life was worth ten of mine.ā
He doesnāt hesitate this time as he walks back toward the elevator, ignoring the way Gogol howls with laughter even as Piano Man has his men drag Gogol back into the most secure cell in the Mafia headquarters. Chuuya follows behind Dazai dutifully, and itās only when they reenter the elevator does he finally speak.
āYou sure you donāt just want him killed?ā Chuuya asks, voice a bit stunted and awkward.
Dazai doesnāt respond. āI have a mission for you.ā
āHah?ā Chuuya demands. āNow? Whatāre you talking about?āĀ
āA meeting with Goldoni of the Family in Rome, heās insistent that itās done in person. Itās essential that it takes place as soon as possible. Iāve booked a flight for you, it leaves in two hours.ā
āTwo hours?ā Chuuya hisses. āWhat are you planning, Dazai?ā
Dazai doesnāt respond again. Instead, he turns his head to the side, looking at Chuuya dead on. āThatās a direct order, Chuuya.ā
Chuuya draws back as if heās been slapped, but he doesnāt speak up after that, and Dazai knows that heās won. By the time Chuuya lands in Rome, everything will be overāthe last step of the plan will be complete. His eyes flutter shut as he leans back against the wall of the elevator; he feels a type of contentedness that he hasnāt felt since he watched you drive off with Albatross, Hirotsu, and Tachihara.
Soon, he sighs to himself softly, eyes reopening to focus on his reflection. He swears he can see you again, feel the ghost of your touch against his skin as your fingers lace with his. All he has left to do is talk to Odasaku, and then he can be with you again.Ā
We can watch one last sunrise together.
āI had someone once, yāknow?ā Dazai Osamu says, expression distorted and eyes distant, drawing to invisible figures sitting at the stools with them. Oda stares curiously, watching as he opens and closes his mouth, as if trying to figure out what to say. āIt was hard. Without you and her, everything was so much harder. I tried so hard to do things right, to protect this world; I did what I could, but I couldnāt stay away from her.ā
Dazaiās words disappear with his ragged breathing, dozens of emotions crossing over his face as he stares at his lap. Oda doesnāt speak, trying to put together whatever piece heās missingāfigure out who this her is that Dazai is referring to so that he can understand whatās going on. He keeps his gun steady, pointed at the boss of the Port Mafia in case this whole thing turns out to be a trap even if heās slowly starting to doubt it.
āI didnāt get to say goodbye to her,ā Dazai says airly, talking more to himself than to Oda. āShe said sheād see me later. Told me she loved me. I didnāt say it back. Do you think she knew, Odasaku?āĀ
The man in question chooses his words carefully when Dazai looks at him, black eye wide and imploring, much like a child seeking out advice from a trusted adult. After a few moments, Oda finally says, āWomen are a lot more intuitive than men. If she said it, Iām sure she knew you felt the same.ā
Dazai lets out a quiet laugh, a soft smile on his lips and a fond, but faraway expression on his face. āYou always know what to say, Odasaku,ā he murmurs softly, saying that odd nickname again. Oda frowns, but Dazai only continues. āShe was good. A lot better than meā¦ Deserved better than me. She was so smart, Odasaku, I think you wouldāve liked her. She got into one of the best grad schools in the country, yāknow? Was on her way to orientation when-ā
Dazai stops talking suddenly, takes in a sharp and stunted breath, eye going a bit wild as if he canāt even force out the words. Oda is suddenly frowning, recognition sparking in his head as he remembers you, the sharp girl from the train station that heād failed to save; the one who's been haunting his mind since the moment that golden swirl appeared and dragged you away. Ranpo had deduced it was mafia business rather quickly, but Oda couldnāt convince himself of it because he couldnāt figure out how someone like you was affiliated with the mafia.
Thisā¦ It would make sense, wouldnāt it? Still, Oda couldnāt imagine you with someone like the man sitting before him, or maybe he could, he reconsiders, watching the adoring expression that paints the mafia bossās face as he talks about you, the smile on his lips and the enamored look in his eye, the pride. Oda doesnāt think heās ever seen a man look so entirely lovesick before.
Dazai looks at him curiously, must have caught the spark of recognition on his face. āDo you know her?ā
Oda pauses, trying to figure out what to say. He doesnāt know if he should admit to seeing you in the moments before you were killed; Dazai Osamu is clearly not stable, fickle and capricious with his emotions, Oda worries that the mafia boss might abruptly turn on him, become hostile when he realizes Oda could have saved her but failed.Ā
āYou did,ā Dazai breathes out, excited suddenly, eye lit up like a child who has been told Christmas is coming early. āYou knew her, you did, didnāt you? How did you meet? Wasnāt she incredible? Tell me.ā
Oda inhales slowly, testing the words on his tongue before he says: ā... I met her at the train stationā¦ that day.ā Dazaiās smile wobbles at the edges, a glassy look in his eye like heās looking right through Oda. Oda continues speaking quickly, āShe was brilliant. She gave me a good idea on how to end the book Iāve been writing.ā
Dazaiās smile softens, the childish appearance disappears as he looks down at his drink. āWill you use it?ā
Oda responds honestly, āI think I will.ā
Dazai looks as if heās been given a precious gift and for a moment, Oda hesitates, gaze lingering on the expression that is somehow both sorrowful and content at the same time.
āItās almost dawn, isnāt it?ā Dazai says, a bit distantly. Oda watches carefully as an unfocused look clouds Dazaiās black eye, his head turning to look out the window of the bar. āShe loved sunrisesā¦ I promised her we would watch one more together.ā
The sun breaks the horizon in the distance, Dazai smiles wistfully as the colors spread across the morning sky. Endless pink clouds dance in the dawn, orange paints the skies; he stands at the edge of the roof where you sat with him that first morning, leaning your head on his shoulder as you watch all of the shapes the clouds make.
āDoesnāt that one look like a cat?ā
Dazai hums in agreement as his gaze traces the sky; heās never been able to see all of the figures you point out in the clouds, but he likes listening to you talk. Sometimes, youād spin stories as you rest on his chest, and heād doze off to the sound of your voice. He wants to look down to where youād normally be sitting, but heās afraid that if he looks, heāll find you disappointedāsad eyes staring at him as if you know what heās about to do.Ā
Worse, heās scared that if he looks, you wonāt be there.
Distantly, he can hear Atsushi and Akutagawa still arguing with one another, shouting questions at Dazai, but it all sounds distant and muffledāhe couldnāt make out the words if he tried. Heās hyper focused on the sound of your voice in the billowing wind; he can almost imagine that each brush of the gusts against his skin is your touch.
He waits, even as he hears Atsushi creeping toward him, trying to get to him before he lets himself fall over the edge. He promised you one last sunrise, and it would be remiss of him to not stay long enough for you to watch your favorite part.
āShe loved sunrises,ā Dazai repeats again, this time for Atsushi and Akutagawa to hear. Atsushi halts at the words and he can hear a wavering ābossā escape Atsushiās lips. He closes his eyes and he can picture you in front of him, a soft expression on your face, lips curved up, and a dreamy smile tugs at his lips. āIāve waited for this moment so long. Iām pleased, I really amā¦ I just wish things had turned out differently. I wanted her to live, and I wanted to read his novel when he finished it, but I guess what I want doesnāt matter anymoreā¦ Itās enough to know that they were able to meet here.ā
āPlease wait,ā Atsushi cries out, and Dazai can hear him moving again, stumbling as he tries to get closer. āDazai-san, wait!ā
āAtsushi-kun, Akutagawa-kun,ā Dazai says. He opens his eyes again, watching as the sun finally crosses the horizon in its entirety, basking the world in an ethereal morning glow. His breath catches, and Dazai sees you again standing before him, haloed by the light. He reaches out hesitantly, but draws his hand back before his fingers can graze you, not wanting to taint you with his touch. āIāll leave the rest to you.ā
Dazai takes a step forward closer to you. He ignores Atsushiās screams and Akutagawaās shout. His eyes slide shut as he falls, the wind whistling in his ears and ripping the air from his lungs, but Dazai feels at peace for the first time in weeks. A smile curls to his lips, he swears that he feels your arms wrap around his waist, the familiar weight of your head resting on his chest.Ā
Dazai hopes, maybe a bit irrationally, that there might be a universe out there that he missed, one where the two of you are able to live out your lives. Maybe if heās lucky, Odasaku will be around too. Heāll have finished the novel with your help, just like in this universe; and Dazai will pout and whine whenever you push him out of the room to brainstorm with the older man, but heāll always smile as soon as heās out of sight, content, happy. Heāll get to read the novel once itās publishedāyou refuse to let him get any peeks until itās done and you yell at him and Odasaku when Dazai tries to guilt him into showing him itāand heāll get to be with you.
Heāll get to be with you.
Find me again. Next time, Iāll make it right.Ā
I promise.
GUYSSSSSS WATERLOO IS OVER I'M ACTUALLY GOING TO CRY. this series has been my baby for so long i don't even know what i'm going to do with myself now that it's over. :(
some notes to share with u guys:
fyodor's ability. SIGH. the past few chapters fucked up my plans, so we're going to imagine that that his ability is still the kill on touch for the sake of my sanity. or maybe he used someone else's ability to kill her. who knows. i had this scene set in mind from waterloo day one so i didn't want to change it.
THE ODASAKU-READER CONVERSATION WAS ACTUALLY SO ANTICIPATED, i had the idea from side a when dazai chose to bring her to his grave, and then i was like ... wait, what if in side b... and i think it's a neat tie in to the beast movie too, because if i rmr correctly, he sought out fyodor later on and i think witnessing reader's capture & not being able to prevent her would give him even more of a reason to go after the man.
uu!chuuya hurts my heart truly. he really did care sm about reader the more he got to know her, and he blamed himself so much for her death. and then dazai uses the fact that he disobeyed orders and got her killed against him to make him leave so that dazai can kill himself. poor man will never not blame himself for everything
ICEMAN AS READER'S BROTHER. look, i know a lot of you wanted odasaku but it just didn't fit. she would've recognized his name in side a
badlands!reader -> i fear she is dead and gone, as you all probably have come to terms with by now at the end of the uu. but i want to add in HOW she dies because it's touched on in this chapter & i posted an ask about it a few weeks ago.
in badlands universe, fyodor isn't actually the one to kill reader, it's agatha christie when the order of the clocktower finally makes their move on yokohama for the book. for this, i also have to get into christie and what i think her ability might be - obviously we know it's based on "and then there were none" which is the mystery novel that involves 10 people w various accusations against them being killed/dying according to a nursery rhyme. i dont know exactly how i want the ability to be executed, but i know for the purposes of the fic that involves 10 ppl dying in various ways according to how they died in the book. christie targets various ppl that have been close to the agency/pm and reader is one of them. so over the course of 10 hours, the 10 people start dying. it takes to the 5th hour for them to realize that this is an ability user and not coincidences because by that point 2 ppl affiliated with the pm and 2 ppl that have close ties with the ada die and the two organizations approach each other about it, and obviously ranpo figures out during that meeting that it's an ability targeting ppl affiliated with both organizations. and that's when dazai starts getting a really bad feeling, tries to call her but she doesn't pick up, and then ends up ditching the meeting to go find her but </333 he doesn't get to her in time. her death is the death on the 5th hour and it parallels emily brent from the book: injected with cyanide after drinking poisoned coffee. dazai finds her in their apartment </3 he is too late to save her.
also a fun side note about badlands: reader and dazai were, in fact, engaged.
anyways, i love you all, thanks for sticking along the ride with me
(ćā” āæ ā”ć)
#dazai x reader#dazai x you#bsd x reader#bsd x you#dazai osamu x reader#dazai osamu x you#bungo stray dogs x reader#bungo stray dogs x you
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Hello :)
May I ask you for an eating out session with Togame Jou, Yamato Endo and Hayato Suo?
coming undone.
featuring:Ā Togame Jo x f!reader, Hayato Suo x f!reader
contains:Ā established relationships, cunnilingus (ofc), orgasm denial/control from Suo, dom!Suo, aftercare
note:Ā all characters are aged up to 21+!
MDNI | 18+ content
word count:Ā 2.3k
masterlist
a/n: ty for this request!! unfortunately i haven't read the manga so i don't think i'd do Endo justice bc i don't know him that well (he has got some SERIOUS drip tho ngl) but i hope you enjoy Togame and Suo!!
Togame Jo
Your day has been shit.
You trudge through your front door, dropping your bags and jacket on the floor and trudge over to your bed, falling face down onto it with a groan. Itās not even 7pm but youāre ready to go to sleep and hope that when you wake up tomorrow, you never have to put up with a single customer again.
You know you should get undressed but your body aches from standing for a full ten-hour shift and youāre so emotionally drained, you just want to rot where youāve landed.
āWho do I need to fight?ā Togameās voice floats from somewhere behind you. Heās only half-joking.
You sigh in response, not even having the energy to vent.
Togameās hand smooths across your back, feeling your stress knots. He gives a sympathetic tut. He hates seeing you like this, hates that you hate your job but thereās no other jobs going. Every time you tell him about another shitty customer, he has to physically restrain himself from tracking them down.
āWhat do you need, baby?ā he asks, his deep voice soft.
āJust want to lie here,ā you mumble into the bed covers. āFeel like shit.ā
Togame looks over you, feeling your sore limbs and he desperately wants to smooth the stress from your brows, wash the worries from your mind. He knows what to do.
With easy strength, Togame moves you up the bed, gently turning you onto your back. You let him, flopping over with another heavy sigh.
āSorry,ā you mumble. āIām not good company right now.ā
āYou see me complaining?ā Togame grins down at you.
The corner of your mouth upticks despite yourself. You fling an arm over your eyes, sitting in easy silence for a few minutes. Itās not long before you feel the mattress shift beneath you as Togame pushes his body between your legs, leaning over you. You feel his lips on your cheek before moving down to your neck, pressing soft kisses.
You donāt move, letting Togame lick a lazy stripe across your collarbone.
āHow about I make you feel better, hmm?ā he hums in your ear.
Just from Togame kissing your neck, you know youāre already wet, but you really donāt have the energy to do anything right now. You pull away your arm from your eyes.
āIām sorry, Jo,ā you tell him. āIām too tired. I donāt think I can cum tonight.ā
Togame thumbs your bottom lip, easy smile on his face.
āYou donāt need to do a thing,ā he says. āAnd thereās no pressure to cum, okay? I just wanna kiss your pretty little pussy for a bit.ā
You feel your lips tugging into a smile.
āOkay,ā you relent, with a playful roll of your eyes. āGo ahead.ā
āThanks, baby.ā Togame grins. āAlways so good to me.ā
He pushes up your dress to your waist before lying down on his stomach between your legs. He doesnāt take off your panties, not yet. Togame likes to take his time, especially with the things he enjoys most.
Togame sucks small bruises into your inner thigh, replacing the marks heād left a few days ago. Your legs are lazily laid out, not enough energy to even pull them back for him but Togame doesnāt mind. He slings them over his shoulders, your calves resting on his solid back.
You feel his hot breath on your clothed pussy just before the heat becomes solid, his tongue pressed against the thin fabric. Togame brushes his tongue up and down your panties, just on the other side of your clit, the warmth of him teasingly sweet. Togame loves feeling you get wet through your panties, loves knowing he can make you soak them through. He presses wet kisses against the fabric, tasting you more and more as your body responds.
You lie there, sighing softly, enjoying the feel of Togameās mouth even through your panties.
Needing to taste more of you, Togame eventually hooks his fingers under the hem and tugs them down, repositioning so he can move them down your legs. Theyāre not even fully off, still dangling around one of your ankles when he returns to your dripping pussy.
Togame presses his mouth flush to your mound, his tongue dipping between your folds. He moans into your pussy as he finds a well of your slick, lapping his tongue in and out of your hole for more.
āMmm,ā you moan lightly, your eyes closing. Youāre motionless, no energy left in you as Togame lazily makes out with your pussy.
His strong nose nudges your clit as he pushes his tongue deeper inside you and your hips buck on instinct. Togame pulls back to suck on your lips before licking his way back up to your swollen bud.
He could spend forever between your legs. Heās not even trying to make you cum, too lost in exploring you with his tongue, in mapping and memorising every inch of you. He latches his lips around your clit as he flicks his tongue over it and you make your first real moan of the night.
Togame smiles against you. Heāll never get bored of hearing you make that sound. But he knows youāre tired and sore. He knows youāre not in the mood for anything rough or fast or hard. And heās more than happy with that ā this is always more his pace.
Togame laps at your hole again, gathering more of your arousal on his tongue before returning to your clit. You move only slightly, only enough energy to whimper, your fingers barely grasping the bed sheets. Togame continues his languid strokes of his tongue, resting his temple on your thigh as he sucks slowly on your clit.
You can feel your orgasm building, your body responding to Togame even when youāre too tired to lift your arms. Togame can feel it too, in the slight quiver of your thighs.
In the quiet evening of your shared bed, amongst your low whimpers and his lazy moans, Togame makes you come undone against his tongue. Itās not the kind of orgasm that seizes you, that makes you see white and curves your spine. Itās the slow kind. One that sends ripples of pleasure right through to your fingertips, that coats your boyfriendās mouth and chin in your juices.
Togame rises up, not bothering to wipe his face, but by the time he crawls up to kiss you, youāve already fallen asleep.
Hayato Suo
Youāre lying bent over the bed, your wrists bound in front of you and tied to the headboard. Suo hums as he ties your ankles to the feet of the bed, making sure the binds are snug but not too tight. He takes his time, knowing the anticipation is killing you, and thatās half the punishment.
When Suoās done, he presses a soft kiss to the back of your thigh ā making you jolt ā before rising to his feet. He cocks his head, raking his eyes over you with a smile.
You look so pretty like this, all splayed out for him, not an inch of you he canāt see or touch. He has to resist the urge to smooth his hand over your skin, to stop himself touching you just yet.
āYouāve been bad,ā he says, his voice light but thereās a hard edge to it. Just the sound of his voice makes you shudder.
āY-yes, sir,ā you manage to stammer out. āIām sorry.ā
Suo chuckles darkly.
āYes,ā he muses. āYou will be.ā
You close your eyes, goosebumps springing along your exposed skin.
You had been teasing Suo all day when you were both out with your friends ā your hand just slightly too high on his thigh, bending over slightly too long in front of him, your kisses slightly too lingering. You couldnāt help yourself. Suoās always so in control, so sharp-eyed heās one step ahead of you. Seeing him struggle to keep his composure as you teased the life out of him was just too damn satisfying.
And now youāre paying for it.
Suo trails his fingers in a featherlight touch across the back of your thigh. You squirm under his touch, desperate for more, and Suo tuts at you.
āYouāre going to stay still and behave,ā he instructs. āUnderstand?ā
āYes, sir.ā
āGood girl.ā
Thereās a long pause. You swallow, not able to see what heās doing. Itās thrilling and a little scary at the same time but you trust Suo more than anything. You wait, almost patiently.
You bite down a squeal as you suddenly feel Suoās tongue on your pussy. He licks a long, deep stripe from your clit to your hole before sliding his tongue inside you. You whimper lightly, keeping as still as possible like he told you too.
Suo pulls your cheeks apart to give him better access, fucking your tight hole with his tongue. You feel him hot and wet inside you, rubbing against the nerves at your entrance to make your thighs quiver involuntarily. You desperately want to move, to push your hips back against his face, but Suo has you tied down firmly. All you can do is lie there as he slides his thick tongue in and out of you.
By the time Suo moves down to your clit, he finds it dripping with your arousal and throbbing under his touch. Even the lightest lick is enough to make you gasp, your legs pulling against the restraints as your thighs clench.
Suo listens to you, to your moans and the way your body moves, keeping his strokes focused on your clit. His hands move to the flesh of your ass, grasping you firmly as he sucks on the sensitive bundle of nerves.
āCan I ā ah ā can I cum, please, sir?ā you whimper against the bed sheets, your orgasm impending and coming quicker than your lust-addled brain can process.
āNo.ā
Suo pulls back, your pleasure quickly replaced with frustration.
With what little movement you could make, you sink back onto the bed. Suo continues to touch you, stroking your back and the sensitive spot on the back of your thighs, but he doesnāt lick you again. Not yet.
When you donāt complain, instead remaining silent - albeit a bit pouty - on the bed, Suo smiles and squeezes your ass.
āGood girl,ā he praises.
Suo returns to your hole to flick his tongue over it, gathering your slick. Your taste is addictive and Suo has to fight not to get lost in the moment, not to close his eyes and give you exactly what you want. But youāve been teasing him, almost making him lose control, and he canāt have you getting away with that.
You start to stir again under him as he eats your sensitive pussy. Suo sucks on your lips, slides his tongue in your hole and licks fat stripes between your folds. He teases you, licking you deliciously but never going where you really need him to.
Your clit throbs with need, Suo assaulting you with pleasure without bringing you to the apex. Itās only when your juices are dripping down his chin and youāre half-sobbing on the bed that he moves down to your clit again.
You make an almost feral moan as he latches around your swollen bud, his soft, hot tongue stroking against it in the way he knows drives you crazy. Suo uses his thumbs to pry your lips apart, gently freeing your clit from its hood. He carefully laps at it, so exposed and sensitive that even the lightest lick is enough to makes your thighs shake.
āF-fuckā¦ā you breathe raggedly. āIāmā¦ oh, fuckā¦ C-can I please ā ah ā please cum, sir?ā
The desperate plea in your voice makes Suo smile. Still, he pulls back and says, āNo.ā
You bury your face in the sheets to stop from screaming. Your pussy aches, even the air on your lips enough to make sparks of pleasure run through you.
Suo stands and slides two fingers inside your sopping pussy. You moan and try to buck your hips, held down by the restraints. Suo slowly pistons them in and out of you but he doesnāt curve his fingers, doesnāt seek out the bundle of nerves inside you that he knows will make you cum. Heās just keeping you going, keeping your pleasure sustained without taking you over the brink.
āP-please, sir,ā you sob. āPlease, I need to cum.ā
Suo hums thoughtfully.
āYou are begging very nicely,ā he allows, fondness in his voice. āHave I punished you enough?ā
You try to speak but Suoās fingers are addling your brain, making it hard to think. You desperately nod instead.
āAre you sorry?ā
āMāsorry,ā you moan. āWonātā¦ do it ā uhn ā again. Promise!ā
"Then you can cum, sweetheart."
Suo withdraws his fingers, leaving you feeling empty, but itās soon replaced by his tongue. You moan, long and low with satisfaction as he softly sucks on your clit again. Youāre so oversensitive that any stimulation would have done but the feel of Suoās deft tongue is enough for an orgasm to rip through you.
You cry out, half-sobbing, as pleasure wracks your body. If you werenāt tied to the bed, your legs would collapse from under you. You fist the bed sheet so hard your knuckles turn pale, a seemingly endless tidal wave running through your body. By the time your orgasm starts to fade, youāre breathing hard against the sheets, sweat coating your body, your throat hoarse from moaning.
Suo unties your restraints, pressing kisses against your skin as he does so. When youāre finally free, he scoops you easily into his arms before sitting on the bed, his back against the headboard and you over his lap. He strokes soothingly down your back and legs as you curl up against him, his heartbeat against your cheek.
āYou feel okay, my love?ā he asks, voice soft.
āMhm.ā You give a small nod. āMāokay.ā
āYou were such a good girl,ā he assures you, pressing gentle kisses against your forehead and temple. āI love you so much.ā
You snuggle up tighter against his chest.
āI love you too.ā
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One Mistake - Aemond Targaryen x Sister!Reader.
Warning : typical inscet Targaryen, angst, mentions of an affair, harsh language, mention of blood, miscarriage.
You looked at your husband with the knife still at his neck, your tears flowing freely. You ignore the screams of your mother and sister asking you to stay away from Aemond, you are really angry now that Aemond has crossed the line.
"What are you waiting for? kill me nowā you could see Aemond smile a little and it made your stomach turn, how could he be this calm when there was a knife at his neck?
"You think I can't do it, huh? You're wrong husband, I really can" once again you pressed the knife deep into his neck which you guaranteed might have hurt him because you could see the change in his expression a second ago.
You continued to stare at him sharply and angrily, but suddenly you dropped the knife in your hand. You may be angry and disappointed, but you still love him. he looked at you in shock and you ran out.
You ignored everyone's whispers and stares as you ran towards your chambers, you no longer cared what they said. As soon as you enter your chambers, you throw everything and scream.
You ignore the knock that comes from outside the door, you feel empty, you feel weak, your husband, the person you love has a child with someone else. A bastard, news that you can deny as strongly as possible, but it turns out that today the woman, Alys, brought their son and you saw him. A son that Aemond longed for was in her arms.
Suddenly your world was destroyed, the dreams you had created together with Aemond suddenly collapsed. You kept crying and screaming until your throat felt hoarse, You decided to stay in your chambers, you wouldn't come out to anyone. even your mother and your twin sister.
āMy love? can you let me in?ā You hear the soft voice of your mother who has been begging you to come in for three days, but you still hold on firmly and don't let her in.
you can hear her breath before she knocks again, āyou should at least eat, I'm worried about your health love.ā You remained silent, you hadn't even touched the food she brought you yesterday.
when night falls, your mother still continues to persuade you to open the door. This time she was accompanied by your sister, Haelena. āy/n.. please open the door, talk to meā but they noticed that your chambers door was no longer locked.
When they opened the door to your room, your mother screamed hysterically when she saw your current condition. You are lying on the floor with blood coming out from between your legs, there are also bloodstains on your mattress, there are visible tear marks on your cheeks and soft sobs are also coming out of your mouth.
"M- mother.. what happened?" that's all you can ask, Haelena ran out to call the Maester while your mother shouted for Aemond. You slowly closed your eyes making your mother panic even more and suddenly everything went dark.
You lie on the bed, your mother and sister always visit and even accompany you. It's been almost two days since you were unconscious after that incident, the incident where you lost your first child who you didn't even know was growing inside you.
When you find out that you have just had a miscarriage, you feel very useless, you feel broken, and feel empty. you blamed yourself until your mother told the Maester to give you medicine to help you sleep.
You growled as you felt extremely dizzy, you blinked your eyes and looked around you. until your eyes fell on Aemond who was standing near the fireplace, he looked at you with a blank but sharp gaze.
āWhat are you doing here? I don't want to meet youā you spat at him as he walk closer to your bed. You were shocked when you felt his big hands grip your cheeks roughly, you looked at him with tears in your eyes.
ābecause of you, I lost my child. because of your stupid and childish attitude, I lost my heirā
You looked at him in disbelief and anger, tears rolling down your cheeks now. You let go of his hand with all the strength you have, you're angry, you're furious. Not only does he blame you but he also doesn't realize that the reason they lost their child was because of him.
ļæ½ļæ½ļæ½my fault? you blame me?! Don't you think Aemond!? why am I like that? you cheated and got that whore pregnant! you have a child with someone else! and you can still blame this on me?! Are you crazy!?ā
you screamed in his face, your breathing was very irregular because you were angry. your eyes are red from crying, you can't understand how he could blame you?
āWhat?! now you can't talk huh? what I said is a fact! You got her pregnant and hoped I would forgive you because I love you?!? I'm not that stupid! I'm not like Haelena when she found out Aegon had many children from his whore, I'M NOT LIKE HER!ā
Aemond just remained silent and continued to stare at you, he had no intention of replying to you and you hated that. you turned your head around when you heard your mother's voice āwhat is this? y/n darling? why are you screaming? you must rest"
You looked at him and smiled a little, before finally taking the knife that was on the left side of Aemond's body. Aemond was shocked and you pushed his body, he fell unguarded.
"I'm sorry if I was never the best daughter for you mother, I will always love you" before your mother and Aemond could take the knife in your hand, you had already slashed your neck.
Aemond captured your body, you could hear your mother's voice calling all the guards to immediately bring in the Maester. Aemond looked at you in shock and fear, you smiled and gently stroked his cheek. "I hope you are happy Aem, sorry I couldn't be a good wife for you" then your eyes close and slowly your hand fell from his cheek.
āno, no, no! don't you dare close your eyes! y/n! Forgive me! y/n! please come back!ā Aemond shouted while hugging your body which was starting to get cold, he cried and whispered sorry repeatedly in your ear. when the Maester came, he told you that you were gone. and that night was the night Aemond lost the only person who truly loved him, you.
tag list - @danytar @looneytun3s @hangmanscoming @yazzzmints @julessworldd @eratosmusings (italic means that i canāt tag you)
#hotd#hotd imagine#hotd aemond#aemond targaryen#hotd one shot#aegon ii targaryen#prince aemond#aemond one eye#aemond x reader#aemond fanfiction#aemond fic#aemond x you#prince aegon targaryen#aemond x oc#hotd x reader#hotd fanfic#alicent hightower#haelena targaryen
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