#i lie down to go to bed early -> i get an idea -> its 3am

[irishyuri]

another average night

[cleo-fox]

Daylight

Summary: Despite your best efforts, Sunday morning doesn’t go as planned…and you couldn’t be happier about it.

Pairings: Loki x Female Reader

Warnings: Smut, 18+, Minors DNI, shower sex, fingering, vaginal sex, soft sex, sex that causes you to be several hours late for work, Loki being a (respectful) horn dog.

Series: Overtime (I don't have a masterlist for this yet, but the first fic is here). A/N: This started out as a scene in Overtime that kind of took on a life of its own. You don't necessarily need to read Overtime in order to enjoy or understand this fic, but you'll have more context if you do. Anyway, it was fun revisiting these two idiots--I've got a few more ideas for them up my sleeve, so there will be more in this series at some point.

The sunlight wakes you the next morning.

It’s the same sunlight as always, but it looks different coming through Loki’s window and streaming across his bed. It looks better, you think, splashed across his sheets.

Or maybe it’s the addition of your hand clasped with his resting on those same sheets. Or perhaps it’s the sight of your clothes and his, discarded on the bedroom floor in a pool of sunlight, combined with the fact that you’re still wrapped in his arms. Maybe all of that is why it seems better.

That seems more likely.

You lie still for a moment, simply enjoying the feeling of his arms and the heat of his skin against your bare back. You are reasonably certain he’s asleep from the steady rhythm of his breath on your neck, but you’re not about to disturb the sleepy calm of the morning to confirm that. 

The clock on his bedside table says it’s just after six. Before last night, you would have said that this was a reasonable time to get up—early enough to ensure that you’re in the office by eight, which would hopefully give you enough time to meet this evening’s deadline, but not so early that it makes you question your life and your choices.

But that was before. Now…well. You suddenly find that your priorities look very different from the comfort of Loki’s bed.

You decide that you didn’t really see the clock. Neither one of you thought to set an alarm last night. Sleeping in was inevitable. That’s not your fault. No harm, no foul.

You close your eyes and allow yourself to fall into a light doze, warmed by the sunlight and Loki’s embrace.

Sometime later, you’re woken by the soft brush of a kiss against your neck.

“Did you sleep well?” he murmurs against your neck.

“Yes, though I did have a bit of a late night,” you say. “Someone kept me up.”

“Really? That was rude of him.”

“Very.”

He’s noticeably—achingly—hard. His lips brush against your neck again. “Perhaps he might make it up to you?”

Your intention is to open your eyes, roll over, and allow yourself to be ravished. But in a development you can only describe as tragic, you happen to catch sight of the clock on his nightstand.

7:38 am.

“Shit,” you say. “It’s almost eight.”

Loki is predictably unconcerned about this. “We don’t have any official hours to keep,” he says, his hand skimming along your ribs and down the curve of your waist. “We have all day.”

“Yeah, but we���ve got a ton more to do,” you say, trying to ignore how good he is at kissing your neck or how his hand is drifting down your hip toward the aching pulse between your legs. “We really need every minute.”

“That is true,” he says solemnly. “Perhaps we ought shower together to save time.”

You can’t help but smile. “I kind of feel like you have another agenda.”

“I’d never,” he says.

“The raging hard on pressing against my ass would suggest otherwise.”

You can almost hear him smirk as he gives his hips a teasing little thrust against you. “I contain multitudes.”

You wiggle out of his embrace and slip out of bed. You intend to look back and give him a coquettish look and say something sharp and teasing, but instead, the sight of him takes your breath away. He leans back on his elbows, looking everything like the sort of lounging god you would see depicted in marble at the Parthenon, all chiseled, sharp muscles and clean lines. His cock stands fully erect and deliciously thick, flushed with wanting.

“I can’t help but notice that you didn’t reject the offer,” he says, seemingly fully aware of the path of your gaze. His hand drops to his cock and he strokes himself casually, which very nearly sends your sprinting back to bed.

“You’re right,” you say, trying to keep your cool as you throw him your most beguiling look. “So you should probably hurry up.”

You turn and start walking toward the master bathroom. You don’t need to look over your shoulder to know he’s following you, his gaze hungrily devouring every inch of skin, eyes dark with purpose.

You walk into the master bathroom and are immediately confronted by several flagrant violations of the residential handbook. The TVA is many things, but it is not the sort of place that deviates from set floor plans, nor is it the sort of place that deviates from those plans to install a rainfall shower and soaking tub—in marble, no less.

You think of the stark, vaguely institutional aesthetic in your own master bath and you can’t decide if you’re annoyed at his rule breaking or jealous that he could get away with it.

“I’m not even going to ask if you got approval for this setup because I know you didn’t,” you say as you reach in to the shower to turn on the tap.

“Do you think of anything other than that cursed personnel manual?” he asks as he comes up behind you, his arms snaking around your waist and his lips again finding your neck as he draws you to him.

“First of all, it’s not the personnel manual, it’s the residential handbook, which you specifically agreed to abide by when you signed off on your lease.”

He turns you around so you face him and draws you close, a wicked gleam in his eye, “Oh, I’m going to make you forget all about those ridiculous rules.”

“That’s a pretty tall order—oh.”

His hand is slipping between your legs, stroking your already slick folds.

“I think I’m quite capable of inspiring other passions,” he says, rolling his fingers in a broad circle over the hood of your clit

You loop your arms around his shoulders. You can already feel your knees starting to tremble, but you know he won’t let you fall.

“Bold claim,” you say, “I’m going to need more evidence.”

“Oh, you’re going to get a lot of evidence,” he says softly. He curls a finger inside of you, pressing his thumb against the hood of your clit. “You will have no doubts by the time I’m done presenting my argument. You will be weak-kneed with evidence.”

You shudder as he rocks his hand slowly. He’s touching you enough to stoke the flames of desire, making your hips rock helplessly toward his hand as you try to create that extra friction and pressure that you know will send you flying over the edge. But Loki is meticulous—perhaps even ruthless—about not giving in. 

“Not yet,” he murmurs softly when your latest attempt is thwarted. “Slowly.”

Your pleas become louder and more frequent, but his answer remains the same: slowly. You whimper and beg, but he is resolute.

Steam has fogged up the mirrors and is curling around you when your orgasm finally begins to crest. You suddenly find yourself grateful for his pacing as the intensity builds to a level that makes your knees shake.

“That’s it,” he breathes as you tremble in his arms. “You can come for me now, lovely.”

Like magic, the coil inside you snaps at his command and you cry out as your cunt shudders around his slowly thrusting fingers. Your arms looped around his shoulders are the only thing keeping you standing.

“Beautiful,” he murmurs, pressing a soft kiss against your temple as you sag against him. “Beautiful.”

He gives you a moment to get your bearings before leading you into the shower. He sits down on the marble bench, spreading his thighs wide and pulling you into his lap so you straddle his hips. The spray of the water hits your back as he kisses you again, slow and hungry.

You love everything about this. The heat of the water on your back. The closeness. The way his thighs are spread wide. How his cock presses against your bare cunt. The noise he makes low in his throat when you start rubbing yourself against him.

“Need you,” he mumbles against your neck. His hands squeeze your hips and you reach between the two of you to line his cock up at your entrance.

It occurs to you that you could take the opportunity to tease him, to make him beg for you, but pretending that you have any control over your aching need for him is several degrees beyond impossible. So instead, you slowly ease yourself down onto his cock while he groans against your neck, dragging his lips down to the curve of your shoulder.

The feeling of him inside you is still so new that it feels just a little unreal. After all that wanting and yearning and thinking that he was too handsome, too divine, too out of reach to have, he’s suddenly yours and it’s absolutely dizzying. 

You pause for a moment, eyes closed, savoring the feeling of unyielding fullness, of connection. Of him.

“All right?” he asks softly.

You open your eyes and his look of sweet concern makes your heart swell. “Yeah,” you say, a lazy, satisfied smile tugging at your lips. “I just—I needed a moment. You feel—” You pause for a moment, searching for the right words, sifting through the effusive and flowery and the things that are true but too early to say. “You just feel really good,” you say.

It sounds wildly inadequate, but he seems to understand, to hear all of the unsaid parts that you’re keeping close to your heart. He could turn away, say it’s too much too soon, that you haven’t even said what you are yet, much less committed to anything serious, but he doesn’t. Instead, he leans forward, drawing you into a slow kiss, his hands framing your face, tracing the curve of your cheek and jaw with the kind of reverence that makes you want to say everything you feel.

“You’re perfect.” He says it in between breaths, with such a disarming sincerity that you can’t bring yourself to try and deflect, to name a flaw or even make a joke.

Later, he will tell you that he was struggling with a similar battle, trying to reconcile how new this was with the depth of feeling that was already blossoming in his chest. He will tell you later that he couldn’t believe you were his, just as you couldn’t believe he was yours, that there was something about you that felt right in a way that made him feel like he knew even then.

But right now, he simply kisses you with a fervor that makes your toes curl and your hips start to move.

It’s only the second time that you’ve done this, but there’s a strange blend of both the new and the familiar. The shape and feel of his body pressed against yours is new, but the way that he moves, the way that he touches you is as though he’s loved you for centuries.

The rhythm you fall into is slow, despite the excuse that this shower was to save time. His hand slides down your stomach, his fingers finding your clit to add another layer of bliss to the feeling of his cock inside you. Despite your slow pace, your ascent rushes in fast and brilliant as a comet blazing through the night sky. Your back arches, almost as though you’re presenting yourself as an offering to him as you come undone in his arms. Loki watches you with a kind of breathless wonder, brow furrowing in pleasure, his lower lip caught between his teeth at the tight clench of your cunt around his cock.

Your legs are rubbery with pleasure, but you keep going because you need his release as much as your own. You need to feel him empty himself inside of you, to hear the low groan he makes as he unravels, to see the way his eyes flutter shut. You want crescent moon marks on your hips from where his hands gripped you too tightly in that final ascent, physical proof that you can make not just a god forget himself, but Loki specifically. Loki with all his masks and tricks and artful poise; Loki laid bare below you, free from all artifice and glibness, raw and real and just as he is. All the parts of him that make you think that down this path lies something wonderful (not that you’re ready to call it love. Yet).

But Loki is nothing if not predictably unpredictable and he seems determined to make you work before granting you that little glimpse at the heaven that is the god of mischief coming undone beneath you.

“Let me feel you come again,” he murmurs as soon as you catch your breath.

“Is once not enough?” you say, trying and failing to sound cool and calm, like you’re not completely wrecked for him.

“Hardly.” His eyes flash in a way that makes you shiver as he urges your hips into a faster rhythm. “I am not so easily satisfied when my need has been so great.”

You can feel the coil in your hips beginning to tighten again.

“I’ve burned for you for years, my love,” he says, his voice going a little shaky. “Would you deny water to a man dying of thirst?”

You shake your head, your words lost to the oncoming wave of your undoing.

“Then do not deny me your pleasure, I am desperate for you.” He’s panting, barely holding on to his composure. “Now come for me again, let me feel you.”

You are so far gone that it only takes a few more strokes to make you come undone and the first shudder of your climax takes Loki with you.

You savor his pleasure more than your own release, memorizing the sound he makes, the way his lips form a silent plea in the shape of your name until he slides a hand up your neck and pulls you down to kiss him.

His kiss is fierce and hungry at first, but it ebbs to something slower and sweeter as he empties himself into you. He sighs as you tangle your fingers in the wet tendrils of his hair.

It’s a long moment later when you finally break the kiss, resting your forehead against his.

“I don’t think we saved any time,” you say.

He doesn’t even open his eyes. “I cannot overemphasize how much I do not care about being late in these circumstances.”

You grin. “Not even a little?”

He kisses you sweetly on the mouth before opening his eyes, his lips curling into a slow and satisfied smile. “I would be late every day for the rest of my life for just a few seconds of that.”

His words spark something warm in your chest and you try to hide it with a wry look. “I’m not sure that you’re getting the better end of the deal.”

He kisses you softly. “You don’t know how good you feel.”

“You’re one to talk,” you murmur against his lips and he smiles as he deepens the kiss.

The warmth of his body pressed against yours and the feeling of him smiling as he kisses you is a kind of luxury you’ve never imagined. It takes you a while to untangle yourselves, but you can’t find it in yourself to move any faster.

The actual showering part of your shower is slow and unhurried and you find that Loki’s hands are equally gifted at these mundane tasks. His fingers have a knack for finding every stubborn knot in your neck and shoulders, which he explores leisurely under the pretext of washing your back. The press of his fingers unwinds the tension in your shoulders, loosening up muscles that have been too tense for too long.

“You are way too good at this,” you say.

“Just one of my many talents,” he says, dropping a kiss on your shoulder. “Though perhaps I ought to stop—I wouldn’t want to make you late.”

“I’m so relaxed I’m going to ignore that little bit of sass.”

He chuckles against your shoulder. “You’ll forgive me.”

“We’ll see.”

The sweet, almost chaste kisses he’s been pressing against your neck and shoulders are gradually growing slower, more insistent. When you feel the tip of his tongue draw a quick, teasing line on your neck, you know that you might be in trouble.

His hands slide to your waist, drawing you close enough that you can feel that he’s hard again. 

“I’m sensing some ulterior motives,” you say.

“A bold accusation,” he mumbles against your neck, pressing himself more firmly against you.

“We can’t have sex again,” you laugh.

“Mmm, we could,” he says in between kisses. “There’s nothing stopping us from having sex again.”

“We are already running late—”

“I thought I was very clear about my feelings on timeliness in these circumstances.” He nips at your earlobe and you shiver. “And would you really deprive me of the utter bliss of coming undone inside you?”

“It’s more like rescheduling than depriving you of anything.”

“I’ve waited so long, darling.”

“We just had sex like…less than an hour ago,” you say through a laugh.

“Ah, but the days before that were so terribly long,” he says.

You turn to face him, thinking this will make things easier for you. This turns out to be a grave miscalculation because now you have to contend with the fire in his eyes and the twin flame that it summons low in your hips.

Fuck. 

You are definitely going to have sex again.

His eyes glitter like he knows and he slowly walks you backwards until you’re pressed between him and the shower wall.

“You are absolutely incorrigible,” you say as he peppers your neck with slow, decadent kisses. “I can’t believe you talked me into this.”

“Funnily enough, I don’t think you’ll be complaining about my mouth in about thirty seconds.”

And with a wicked and hungry grin, he slowly sinks to his knees.

It’s 10:48am when you finally walk into the office.

Even though you are now several hours later than you intended and the stack of files is no less imposing, you feel nothing but a pleasant glow of happiness as you take your seat. Loki sits down in the chair next to you and this time, he sneaks his foot underneath your desk and hooks his ankle under yours.

He catches your eye and smiles. “I can be a little more obvious now.”

You put on your most exaggerated expression of mock seriousness. “Only a little. This is a workplace, after all.”

He adopts a similar expression and nods. “Of course. I imagine there will be paperwork as well.”

“There actually is a form we’ll need to file with HR,” you say.

Loki frowns. “Wait, you’re not being serious about that, are you?”

“Yep. We’ll need to file it by next Friday.”

He sighs and throws his hands up in the air. “Is there anything that this place hasn’t managed to weigh down with the burden of unnecessary bureaucracy?”

“I see we’re in a good mood this morning.” Mobius has arrived, cup of coffee in hand. He nods at Loki and looks at you. “How long has he been raging against the machine?”

“Not terribly long,” you say as Loki rolls his eyes.

“It’s not raging against anything,” he says. “I just fail to see the point of some of this organization’s operational practices.”

Mobius raises an eyebrow at you. “You told him he has to fill out a form, huh?”

“Got it in one,” you say as Loki scowls.

Mobius chuckles and takes a sip of coffee. “You should hear him during performance evaluation season. I get entire monologues. It’s like Hamlet meets HR.”

Loki’s scowl deepens and you have to bite the inside of your cheek in order not to laugh.

“It looks like you made good progress, though,” says Mobius, looking at your completed stacks of files. “I took a look at what you pulled earlier this morning and there’s some good stuff.”

“Oh, good,” you say, hoping he doesn’t think much of the fact that neither one of you was in the office earlier this morning. “What time do you think you’ll need the rest done?”

“Right, about that,” says Mobius. You steel yourself for bad news. “I took a look at what you pulled so far and I think I’ve got what I need.”

You blink at him. “Wait, really?”

“Yeah, you’re off the hook,” he says. “Go enjoy the rest of your weekend.”

You look at Loki, who looks just as pleasantly surprised as you feel.

“In fact, you can take the rest of the week off,” says Mobius. “Triple overtime, right? You earned the time.” 

“This feels like a trick,” says Loki. “What’s the catch?”

“No catch,” says Mobius. “You did good work.” He takes a sip of his coffee. “However—”

“And there’s the catch,” says Loki.

“There’s no catch,” says Mobius. He gestures at you with his coffee cup. “I’m just going to need you both to turn in the relevant paperwork to HR by next Friday.”

Loki sighs, though you can tell he’s fighting a smile. “There’s absolutely no privacy here.”

Mobius raises his eyebrows. “You’re playing footsie under the desk. It’s not exactly rocket science.”

You look at Loki and shrug. “He’s got a point.”

“You’re taking his side?”

You roll your eyes and stand up. “Well, you can sulk about it if you’d like, but I’m going to go enjoy the rest of my weekend.” You share a sly, secret smile with Mobius. “I’ll see you next week, Mobius.”

It takes Loki approximately twenty seconds to catch up with you.

“And you say I’m incorrigible,” he says as he falls into step beside you.

You smile at him. “I think you’ll get over it.”

“I’ll consider it.” He catches your band, fingers twining with yours. “What are your plans for the rest of the week?”

“Hadn’t decided,” you say, biting back a smile. “Did you have any suggestions?”

“Well, I’d like to start by going back to bed.”

“To sleep?” you tease. 

“Eventually.” He licks his lips. “And since our respective schedules have been cleared for the week, we’ll be able to take our time.”

The hunger in his eyes is still so new and intoxicating that you can’t help the shiver that works its way up your spine.

You give him a slow smile. “Lead the way.”

[g0dlyunsub]

hey!!! Ugh I just love your account! I have a request for Spencer Reid x fem reader!! Can you do one where he is always working and it makes the reader upset bc he is cancelling dates and coming home late and kinda neglects her feelings and doesn't really notice how much it affects her and how sad she gets and then he misses their anniversary dinner and she breaks and tells him that it makes her upset when he's gone all the time and he just feels so awful bc he's so in love with her and never wants her to feel that way because of him and apologizes and reassures her and makes sure she feels loved!!

ty for the request and i loved the idea for this one!

wishful thinking.

pairing :: spencer x fem!reader

warnings :: angst with a fluffy ending; very mild makeout session at the end :3

word count :: 2.4k

author’s note :: i kind of giggled at the ending as i was writing it, but i’m pretty proud of how this one turned out!

accompanying song :: neverthere by xander

spencer’s phone is quite literally the bane of your existence.

you know what to expect whenever it rings, so you hate when it actually does – its earthquaking vibrations and trilled beeps tear the happiness straight out of you.

it’s the second date in a row that he’s had to pass, and you wonder if you should just stop trying so hard. was it selfish to want to have him all to yourself, to have him seated right across from you, sharing your laughter as you pass him his plated pasta? were you expecting too much, imagining a serene life with him ten years down the road, perhaps with kids or pets of your own? was it unfair to think that you could craft a lie, telling him your stomach hurt really bad, so bad that you would have to curl up on the floor and pray he’d stay by your side just this once to comfort you?

all you ever wanted was spencer. more specifically, you wanted spencer during your first three dates, when he’d silence all of his phone calls, and wave them off like nothing even though you insisted he take them. maybe if you didn’t bring up the importance of taking work calls, none of this would have ever happened. maybe it was all coming back to bite you for your non-confrontational nature, since you could never plead him to actually stay.

but he’s your boyfriend… and that’s all that matters, right? after all, he has lives to save – people whose names are called out during prayers day and night by their loved ones as they cling on to the sliver of hope that your boyfriend and his team promise during the darkest hours. granted, spencer would drop everything if you were in a similar situation, but none of your problems have actually been life-threatening. but a girl can dream, can’t she? your first anniversary date was when spencer promised to make amends, a formal compensation for all of the past dates that he missed and left you feeling empty on your shared bed, stains of mascara chalked up on your dry cheeks.

“i’m so sorry, honey, i’ve just been… called in for work,” spencer stands, dusting the napkin that was folded nicely on his lap. you watch as he takes a sip of his glass of water, then walks over to you to plant a kiss on your forehead.

he runs his fingers along the velvety texture of the sleeves of your dress, and you offer him a weak smile.

“it’s okay, duty calls, right?” you feel the tears surfacing and you have to fight yourself to not blink. it’s too early to cry.

“i-it’s a really bad one this time, and i hate to do this on such an important day-” spencer begins to apologize frantically, and his face marks an expression of genuine concern with his brows furrowing and lips twitching.

“it’s okay. you need to go, i understand.” you state plainly, and you immediately feel shameful – your words are too assertive and snarly for how you normally respond.

spencer pauses briefly, fidgeting with his fingers, before he gives a slight nod in your direction. he then walks over to the couch, grabs a book, and tightens the clasps on his bag. 

“i’ll be back as fast as i can,” spencer utters quietly and walks out of the door. when the apartment door locks with a click, you break down immediately.

at first, the tears fall one by one. but then, a salty stream evident of pure emotional wreckage makes its way into the slight gap of your lips, and it’s an unstoppable domino effect. your shoulders shudder and heave as you struggle to catch breaths in between, and you splutter cries of your boyfriend’s name. 

maybe it would’ve been better to just stay as conversational partners, to exchange updates once in a while when he’d actually commit to a time. it was your fault for getting your hopes up high, and all of this – fanciful dinner and dressing your best for the occasion – was wishful thinking. you just didn’t want to admit it.

“y/n?” 

you look up to see spencer in front of the doorway, and his bag that was barely holding on to his shoulder drops to the floor with a thud.

you quickly look away, brushing the tears away with one arm and sniffle before choking out a response.

“i thought you left already, why are you here?” again, your words come out icier than you had hoped and hit you with a sharp pang of guilt.

spencer narrows his eyes ever so slightly as if he’s scrutinizing you, observing your body language. it doesn’t take a genius to know that you’re upset.

“i was going to. realized i forgot-,”

he clears his throat when you raise your eyebrows and proceeds, "i misplaced my wallet."

he slips out of his loafers, shoving aside his pair of converses that lie adjacent to your pretty pair of heels. he walks over to you, and you realize that you’re still seated at the dining table. you must look so stupid right now, waiting as if he’d just be returning from a bathroom break.

“i need to head out, but i promise… i promise we’ll talk about this really soon. we’ll have the anniversary dinner and-”

“did you even try?” you blurt out, and you look up at him with your puffy eyes glazed with tears.

a deathly silence clouds over the entire apartment, and you’re thinking of two options: leave the apartment and go run to a friend’s place, or confront him and see whether making amends – again, wishful thinking – would be possible.

“y/n. please believe me when i say that i’ve tried to, i’ve tried-”

you slam a hand to the table before standing up, your face twisting into an expression of outrage.

“no, because then you would’ve silenced it. you would’ve cut the call, just like you used to.” you fire your words at him as your hair sticks to the drying tears on your cheeks, and you begrudgingly wipe at your face. 

a slow sigh escapes from spencer’s lips, and he looks at you with those eyes – the eyes that seemingly warn you, saying you don’t want to go there. not right now.

but you double down on him, the rage fueling your words as you lash out. 

“it was just this one time. i only wanted you to stay for dinner just this one time.” you helplessly drop your hands to your sides, the tears landing on the floor with soft plops.

“i know. and i’m terribly sorry.” spencer bites his bottom lip and takes a step toward you. but you take a step back, and maybe that pulls a string between the two of you, because you can see how his shoulders tense up.

“look, can we talk about this when i get back? i’ll make it up to you, i swear.” he combs through his hair, the stress almost palpable as it leaks from his shaking fingers.

while you know he has to head out again, the way he so easily brushes off the conversation like it’s something he doesn’t even want to think about feeds into your disbelief. soon, however, your anger subsides into a tired frown. 

“i don’t know, you might come home late… when i’m asleep or something.” you look at the wall where a photo of the two of you is framed, and you weakly smile at how happy you seemed then. 

“i’ll give you a call, is that okay?” he searches your face for any signs of approval, but you’re zoned out thinking about the past, of how everything used to be.

“whatever, just go.” you wave him off and walk to the couch, where you lie down and turn against him to face the plush fabric.

spencer sighs, and his hand looms over your head momentarily before he grabs his wallet from the table. you hear a faint sorry trail from behind as he leaves the room, and your nails claw at the arms of the couch before the darkness cradles you once again.

it’s 10:30 pm, and you hear the doorknob click again. you had just cleaned up the dishes after eating dinner alone and left his portion in the fridge. you were now changed into your pajamas and getting ready for your night routine.

you peep out of your bedroom door to see spencer, his suit all wet. he looks at you as he takes off his shoes, and a sullen expression paints his face. did it start raining after he left? you realize that you were mostly cooped up in the bedroom since his departure, so you wouldn’t have known.

bravely looking up at him in the eye, you state: “you came back early.” you hate how unwelcoming you sound in his own home.

he pauses before he sets his wet bag on the floor and removes his blazer jacket to throw over a chair. 

he approaches you, hands in his pockets and hair twisted in matted curls. 

“hm.” he grabs a towel from the closet and makes his way to the shower, brushing past your shoulder. you feel an icy shudder spread through your spine after he closes the bathroom door.

was he giving you the silent treatment right now? 

you hear the water start from the bathroom and you sink into your bed while turning to twist the lamp lights on.

after all that torturous waiting you went through, he was giving you the silent treatment?

fifteen minutes later, a knock reverberates from the other side of the bedroom door, and even though you don’t respond, spencer steps in. he’s changed into a t-shirt and black pajama pants, and he drops next to you on the bed.

“i’m taking the week off.” 

the sentence startles you, and it’s something so unexpected you choke on your own saliva.

“what, what do you mean you’re taking the week off?” you ask him, finally turning to face him in the eyes. his brown irises blaze into your own.

“i’ve been pushing off everything you wanted to do with me — things that I wanted to do with you — and i’ve just been…” he turns away to play with the wrinkles on his pants as he speaks, picking out the dust that lies embedded between the folds.

he pinches the bridge of his nose and lets out a deep sigh. he continues, “i don’t know if it’s all worth it.”

silence casts a blanket over the two of you.

“spence,” you say after a while, and hesitantly lay a hand on his thigh.

“nothing’s more important in the world to me than you. you and your happiness. i know you love this job and i know you love helping people. you’re such a kind hearted man, and it’s why i fell in love with you in the first place.”

when spencer gives you no response, you confess: “spence, i get jealous sometimes.”

this time his eyes widen, and he looks at you.

“you do?” he asks softly, peering into your eyes and you cave instantly. 

“of course i do. it’s… everybody wants you, spencer. we all need you, whether we realize it or not.”

he scoffs.

“but i only want you.”

his voice is raspy yet mellow at the same time, the smoothest stream of sweetness seeping through your eardrums. god. you can never stay mad at this gorgeous man, the same man that made you cry on numerous occasions just counting the past week.

“you need to do more than that, if you… you know.” you quietly murmur as you fidget with the hem of your nightgown.

“i know,” he speaks with a hushed tone. “i told hotch, and i told him it was going to happen whether he liked it or not. the demands of this job are… tough, but i don’t want to miss out on all the things we planned together. i won’t.”

you start bawling right when he delivers the last word, and all the tears that you were holding back spill over your flushed cheeks. your boyfriend immediately leans in to console you, pulling you into a tight embrace as his chin rests on top of your head. 

it’s okay, he murmurs reassuringly. you ease into his touch, and you realize how much you missed this. how much you missed spending time with him.

his left hand tugs lightly at your soft hair while his right rubs your back in smooth circles. 

“i missed you,” you speak with a hushed voice, looking up into his eyes as a glassy coat of tears blur your vision. 

he cups your face with his hands before whispering, “i missed you too.”

you continue to blabber words of love-stained anguish but he cuts you off short, pulling you in for a short kiss on your lips, which are now tainted with your tears.

“you taste… salty,” he whispers, giving you a slight smile as he brushes off the rest of your tears that weigh down on your eyelashes.

“it’s because of you, silly,” you drawl as you taste the salty residue of your tears.

yeah, spencer responds hesitantly. but he’s wearing a small smile, tilting his head to one side as his eyes emit a glint of tranquilizing peace.

he reaches into his pajama pocket and takes out a piece of candy. you curiously watch as his fingers quickly remove the wrapper, revealing a glazed cherry-flavored sphere. 

“may i?” he asks, and his faint voice is a gravitational force that you can’t resist.

you briefly respond with a lazy hm? before he plops the candy into your mouth and kisses you again. the sweetness explodes like fireworks with his warm breath, and the sticky layer of sugar melts like acid on your intertwined tongues. you let out a satisfied hum when you pull back, and it’s undeniably attractive the way spencer licks the corner of his lips.

a tear falls from your eye again, and this time, it’s not out of sorrow.

[yorshie]

Hello, fellow raccoon here 🦝 If it’s not too much trouble, could you write about sharing a bed for the first time with the Bay!verse turtles?

Ah! Another raccoon! Thank you for the request, I had a lot of fun writing this one! I went with head canon style.

Bayverse x reader, SFW other than bedshare, set in 2023 so turtles are 24-25

Tags: @jackalope-in-a-storm @tmnt-tychou

MICHELANGELO

This sweet turtle got his nest all ready when he heard you were finally spending the night. Brought in your favorite snacks, hunted down all his extra pillows from around the Lair, and restocked his mini fridge in case you got thirsty.

So when the time finally came and you go drop your bag off in his room, there is not a free spot to be found. His bed is a mountain of pillows and blankets, the small coffee table shoved in front of his tv has everything from pizza, microwavable food, and what looks like three different flavors of cookies piled on top of it.

Not gonna lie, its a bit intimidating. You might even have faltered, if sunshine boi wasn't right behind you with your toiletry bags, happy go lucky energy rubbing off until it felt like the spotlight wasn't directly on you.

the rest of the night is spent in typical Mikey fashion, a.k.a. a game and movie marathon. His brothers occasionally wander past his open door to say hello and to see what the two of you are up to. They might have a bet running on how much Mikey smothers you and how long you'll allow it. Even Splinter is in on it, thought the old rat refrains from making an appearance so his youngest doesn't feel like he's doing something wrong. He wants to marry his sons off eventually, after all.

When you eventually get tired and it's time to delve into the towering abyss of pillows that have taken over his bed, Mikey's territorial side makes an appearance. The door gets shut and locked to avoid anyone that might think it's a good idea to pull a prank (none of his brothers would but Mikey is paranoid because he is the prankster), and he wastes no time diving in after you for some cuddles.

oh. ok, maybe there's too many pillows, because now he can't find you! He's lost his significant other! Cue a mini chase where most of his bounty ends up in the floor in his search. You are not getting out of cuddles. No amount of wiggling or hiding will save you.

the actual cuddling is quite nice. Mikey's warm and his bicep makes for an excellent pillow. He likes to lay face to face, with your head tucked under his chin, limbs entangled and churring up a storm that you knew would have his brothers wincing in second hand embarrassment if they ever heard all the turtley noises he made when it was just the two of you.

He definitely snores, though. And farts in his sleep. Fact of life, don't get mad, because we all do it sometimes, most of us just aren't a mutated turtle man with a noxious gut fueled by pizza and sour patch kids. Dutch oven him with his own farts as payback.

in the morning you'll definitely wake up first, though as soon as you start to move Mikey will be alert. Call it sixth sense, but all the turtles are hyper aware of their own personal spaces and who's in them. I hope you weren't planning on getting an early start that morning, because now that Mikey's awake he's ready to continue the movie that you getting sleepy paused the night before. While getting more cuddles and eating breakfast in bed, of course.

LEONARDO

he internally started creating lists as soon as you accepted his sleepover proposal. Panics a little and moved the date once to make sure his sheets are washed the day before. Everything in his space has to be perfectly so. If someone interupts his cleaning and prepping, they better expect to have their head bitten off. Will have a literal panic attack if you arrived early.

You, of course, notice nothing out of place when he presents his room for your inspection. Yes, you read that right. This turtle will practically sweat as he waits for your verdict on whether the nest is good enough. No, he doesn't realize what he's doing. If you pick up on it don't tell him or else he might start panicking again.

The two of you will actually not spend too much time besides sleeping in his room, most of your time will be hanging out in the main living area. This serves two purposes: as the eldest Leo wants you to get along with all his brothers, and two, the thought of his bothers coming by his room to say hi to you absolutely drives is reptile brain crazy. So you'll eat and hangout with everyone else, and try not to laugh at the subtle teasing you know your turtle is going through with the whispered jokes and laughter that seem to stop every time you turn around.

When it gets late enough and everyone starts peeling off to do their own thing, you'll have to let Leo know you are ready to go lay down. Hilarious if you think He's going to suggest it's time to head to bed to you, he's trying his hardest not to think of the words "you" and "nest - BED! he meant bed!" in the same sentence.

when you finish your nighttime routine and make your way back to Leo's room, don't be surprised to find him on a makeshift pallet on the floor. There is no way you couldn't have seen this coming, but don't worry, there's an easy fix. Simply get in his bed, close to the wall, and start shivering. Loudly. Ham it up. In no time flat you'll have a turtle sneaking up next to you to keep you warm, though at first he will be hesitant. Cuddling you in the privacy of his own room with the expectation of sleep is very different from just chilling with you.

despite Leo trying to be a gentleman during the beginning, leaving you a bit of space and trying his hardest not to crowd you, by an hour in he will be wrapped around you. As he slowly gets tipped closer and closer to the edge of sleep, the more loose he will become. And once he gives in and gets used to the cuddles, he will never want to stop.

He clicks and chirps in his sleep sometimes. You woke up thinking there was a baby bird or something in the room, only to discover the high pitched noises were coming from him, before he transitions into deeper churrs from his chest right in front of your eyes. If you keep very still and quiet he might not wake up, but he will be traumatized if he does and discovers he makes these noises

There is very little chance of you waking in the morning before Leo. This turtle gets up early, but maybe just for today he can slip back next to you, after morning training, just to feel close to you for a bit longer. When you wake up you could just spend the morning talking, he won't mind being lazy as long as it's with you

You'll most likely be the one making breakfast if the other brothers aren't up yet, as Leo is banned from making anything other than tea or using the strict guidelines Mikey placed next to the microwave. But, he is an excellent sous chef, and after you're both fed he will be quick to suggest an activity so the two of you can hang out longer. Just know he's already weighing his chances of getting you to spend the next night as well.

DONATELLO

Dee had about 50 reminders set in the days leading up to your first sleepover, and a mental list he was practically grappling with in between projects. Anytime he'd focus on what was coming up too much, the butterflies would start going haywire in his stomach and he was likely to drop whatever it is he's holding at the time

Needless to say, he was in a bit of a panic by the time you showed up. Technically speaking, logically speaking, he knew his bed and room where both clean. And he knew you liked spending time with him, so why the anxiety? Why the nerves? He's so nervous, he doesn't even realize you've arrived, moved around his habitual pacing to set your bag on his bed, and now you're simply watching him with fond curiosity.

He shrieks when he finally notices you. Practically has a heart attack and knocks over at least four stacks of meticulously arranged cds and various technological components. Eventually joins in your laughter after he's calmed down enough to see the humor in the situation.

Just this once, Donnie has cleared his timetable of various projects to focus soley on you. That isn't to say that before he's blown you off or ignored you, but by now you are well aware how hard he has to work to contain his wandering mind, al lthe little tips and tricks he uses to keep his focus on the here and now and not bouncing from idea to idea.

The two of you will not be spending too much time out in the main area. The time it takes the two of you to procure dinner is more than enough brotherly interaction for the tall turtle. Not to mention, it turns almost awkward as the other's try desperately to not make prolonged eye contact with anyone else. They learned a long time ago not to tease the brother that controls all their devices and the access to the wifi.

Once Donnie and you are comfortable back in his room, the true hang out will begin. You'll play rock-paper-scissors to pick a movie, Donnie always lets you win, but he gets to pick the music that plays in the background. If you want, he'll access his computer and set up the program to make the lights in his room dance to the beat. Curled up in his arms, it is the easiest place to fall asleep, surrounded by fluttering lights that mimic being underwater.

Donnie may not actually sleep, but he stays with you the entire night. If you wake at all it might be to the idle scratching of pen on paper as he writes, his hand moving in your hair or along your back, or to his soft breaths caught in a light doze, a soft churr rumbling in his chest. If you're also the type to burn the midnight oil, you both might stay up talking long enough that the morning slowly creeps up on you before you both pass out.

Splinter often stops by the Lab in the morning on his way to meditate, if only to wrap a blanket over his son's shoulders and move his glasses to a safe spot. It's an ingrained habit, so much so that it doesn't even register that you spent the night until he quietly opens the door. He takes on look at the two of you holding each other close, and turns away with a smile.

Dee can cook, but most likely he'll order from the diner one block above their preferred manhole cover, and the two of you will sneak out for eggs, bacon and pancakes before secreting it away in his room so you don't have to share.

RAPHAEL

If the two of you are close enough for a sleepover, Raph is going to be the calmest of his brothers about you being in his personal space. Sure, he'll clean up, make sure all his dirty clothes are in his hamper and all the drawers actually shut on his dresser, but don't expect much in the way of fanfare.

He doesn't care where you wanna hang out in the evening, as long as you're comfortable. If you're out in the Lair proper however, get ready for some brotherly jockeying. Mikey almost can't help teasing Raph about having a guest over for the night, but the bigger brother will take it in stride as long as its only Mikey. Donnie tends to stay out of the limelight when it comes to teasing, but you better hope Leo doesn't so much as raise an eye ridge in Raph's direction. To be fair, the blue turtle is likely only drawing attention to how soft for you Raph is, but the two of them earning a trip to the Ha'shi might put a bit of a damper on the sleepover.

Leo's right though, Raph is completely soft for you. You want something to eat? He'll go get it for you without even a huff. You want popcorn for the movie? He'll bring back soda as well. You ask how much he can bench? He'll toe the line between showing off and making sure he can actually handle the weight. You neck hurts from having to crane around him to watch the movie? He'll lay on the ground and let you splay across his shell. You blink at him and sleepily ask to be carried? You're already up in his arms before you can even finish the sentence.

When it comes time to sleep, Raph will insist you take the inside of the bed, close to the wall, but he's thought ahead and gotten you your own pillow so you don't have to share with him. Yes, technically its from Mikey's room, but don't worry he disinfected it with a shit-ton of Lysol and Frebreze and washed the cover. This doesn't mean he doesn't want to cuddle, but of all the things Raph understands in his life, the very first few are the difference in size between the two of you, just how much he weighs, and how strong he is. So he'll tuck you against the wall and lay out on his stomach in one of the few positions that makes it hard for him to tip over. There's just enough room between the lip of his shell and the mattress for you to slot yourself against him, and he'll take the opportunity to slide his arm around your waist and bury his snout in your hair.

He'll hold you there throughout the night, breath slow and even. If you wake, be prepared that any movement will rouse him. He can't exactly help it, and he tries not to make you feel guilty over it, but you can always make out the green shine of his eyes peering down to make sure you are ok before he drifts back off again.

This turtle churrs sometimes in his sleep, but it's not the cute or soothing churr of contentment. No, someone parked a diesel engine in his man and is revving it like he's driving up an inclined gravel mountain road. The only way to get him to stop is to poke the thin strip of skin along his side, repeatedly, until he snorts and shifts. 50/50 chance the shifting will stop the churring. If not, you'll have to repeat the process.

In the morning, he'll dip before you wake, and come back to the room with warm pastries and whatever he's seen you drink in the morning. If you want your breakfast right away however, you might have to bribe him with turtle smooches as he tries to steal back his spot and catch up on the cuddles he's missed being a good boyfriend. Yes, he's holding you hostage, unless you want to try climbing over him. You might succeed if you make him laugh.

At some point in the day, after breakfast and whatever morning routine you keep, Raph will ask you what you want to do. If you want to go home, decompress, he'll take you home, but if you want to stay again and hang out some more you'll get to see the sweetest, softest smile break across his face.

[emotionalsupport-ljh]

Breaking and Entering

You don't want Jihoon to worry.

Fluff (a miniscule amount of angst) - woozi x fem!reader

A hell of a lot of words for a sick fic :D Described as "princess treatment" by my friends 😌

AO3 link

Word Count: 3.1k

////////////////////////////////////

Before you even open your eyes, you feel a scratch in your throat that burns like hell. You reach for the water on your nightstand and take large gulps trying to soothe the pain. As your eyes open, they droop heavily and take a moment to adjust to the early morning sunlight that makes its way past your curtains. A chill suddenly attacks the uncovered parts of your body. You duck back under your comforter only to have an oppressive heat come in waves that cause sweat to cling to your forehead. On top of all that, you can’t breathe out of your left nostril. You’re terribly sick.

As you lament in your miserable state, a notification brightens your phone and you have to shut your eyes. You blink them trying to get used to the light, but all it does is give you a headache. You brave through the pain to turn your brightness down and check the notification. It’s a text from your boyfriend, Jihoon.

Jiji: good morning babe~ 😘

You: Good morning!

Jiji: what are ur plans for today? work?

You: No

You pause for a moment before continuing your response. You wonder if it’s a good idea to tell him that you aren’t feeling well today. On one hand, he might want to know that kind of stuff so that he can take care of you. On the other hand, it could cause some unnecessary stress in his already stressful life. Also, with his busy schedule, he probably wouldn’t be able to do much. You decide ultimately that this illness would probably be over quickly, and you don’t want to make Jihoon worry about nothing a little cough medicine and tea would fix.

You: I'm going to take the day off to relax and be lazy lol 😏

Jiji: that sounds nice

i wish i could do the same 😮‍💨

You: Busy schedule today?

Jiji: yup 🙃 but im excited for our date later this week

You: Me too!

Jiji: i have to go to work

text me later

You: Will do! I love you 🩷

Jiji: love u too~🖤

Putting your phone down and taking the chance to move from your bed to at least retrieve some relief in the form of medicine or warm tea, you feel your muscles ache in a way that makes you never want to move again. For now, you stare at the ceiling with the resolve to get over this silly little cold. You fall asleep soon after and stay asleep for many, many hours.

When you finally awaken again, the chill in your bones still hasn't subsided, no matter how many layers of sheet and blanket cover you. You have to force your eyes to open against the deeper sunlight now pouring through the cracks in your curtains. You power through the discomfort to get them to adjust to the brightness. Again, you reach a hand out for your phone and see that it is afternoon and that you have some missed texts from your boyfriend.

Jiji: hey~

wuts up

Jiji: taking an afternoon nap huh

text me when u see this

The messages were all sent about 45 minutes ago. You feel a little bad about lying, but it only strengthens your resolve to get better and put the whole lie behind you. You text back like normal, hoping that he has the time to read and respond even for just a few minutes.

You: Sorry! I fell asleep watching anime

It doesn’t take too long for a reply to pop-up. You had been dating Jihoon for months now, but you still got butterflies every time he texted you. Even now, aching all over and dripping from your face, he makes you feel a warmth you swore would make you even healthier than you were before.

Jiji: oh rub it in my face 🙄 lol

dont get too far without me

You: I would never!! 😫

How’s it been today? You're not too stressed, right?

Jiji: eh

im coping lol

nothing im not used to

You: Don’t push yourself too hard ok? 🥺

You're doing such a great job!!!!!!

Jiji: thx lol

i gotta go. love u~ 🖤

You: I love you too 🩷

You decide to try to come up with the ultimate healing game plan for the rest of the day. You plot out your meals and activities to maximize the time you can spend getting better. Or at least you try to as you come to realize that sleeping an extra 4 and a half hours without getting out of bed means that you’ve yet to relieve yourself. This kickstarts your game plan as you rush to the bathroom.

You power through the aches in your body to finally brush your teeth and put your hair in a manageable bun for the day. You put on your sweats and some socks to keep warm and make your way to the kitchen where you heat up some soup and make a mug of herbal tea. You take medicine and take it easy all day. The change in scenery from your bedroom to the living room not only motivates your mind to change, but also it motivates your body to move. You swear you already feel better.

Unfortunately, the next two days look the same, and you do not, in fact, feel any better. Even with minimal movement throughout the days, you still manage to leave a mess of dirty dishes, clothes, and tissues strewn about the apartment. You are miserable and finally starting to come to terms with it. The delusion of your ability to heal quickly and on your own was finally starting to dissipate. You thought seeing a doctor was a waste of time, but you start to see the necessity of an appointment the more time you spend with a scratch in your throat and a headache hammering your skull.

The worst part, however, is not the pain, nor is it the constant sweating or the need to breathe through your mouth. No, the worst part is that today is Jihoon’s one day off; you are supposed to be ready to go on a date.

It's a little late in the morning when you wake up. You thrash in your bed frustrated that you are still sick and very tired. When you check your phone, there are no new messages. It isn't unusual for Jihoon to sleep in on his days off. You dread having to tell him the truth that you had been sick all week and couldn’t go out tonight. You could anticipate his response: a string of crying emojis and then a laugh where he says he’s just kidding and he’s fine as long as you get better. He wouldn’t really be okay with it, but he would say he is. He would be really disappointed; he isn’t very good at showing his true emotions, but you know he feels them so deeply. You don’t want to cause him any undue stress or heartbreak. At this point, it unfortunately is inevitable.

You grab your phone and hover over Jihoon’s contact, trying to muster the courage to send your good-morning-text and your confession followed by a long apology and promises to make it all up to him one day. You don’t expect your phone to ring, brandishing a very familiar sweet smiling selfie with the name “Jiji” underneath. You are startled then you take a deep breath, clear your throat, and answer.

“Good morning, my baby,” a sleep-rasped voice calls out from the other side.

“Good morning,” you try to answer in a normal voice, doing your best to hide your congestion.

“You sound different. What’s up?” Jihoon caught on immediately.

You whine a little over the phone, only prolonging the inevitable. There’s only silence from the other side. “I’m sick,” you say, then blurt out, “I’ve been sick for the past three days. I really, really tried to get better, honestly. I’m so sorry, Jiji. I can’t go out tonight.”

Your heart beats quickly in your chest, maybe from the nerves of finally coming clean, maybe from the extra exertion on your sick body. The five seconds it takes for Jihoon to respond feel like five hours. All he says is, “Oh. Okay.” After that, he hangs up the phone, leaving you stunned and with a horrible pit in your stomach.

You’re in shock. The kind of shock people feel after breaking a limb or recovering from a disaster. It pushes every other feeling out of your body. You do your morning routine in a fugue state. When you sit back in your bed, it all hits you at once. Tears stream down your face almost unconsciously, and you lay down with your face in your pillow. Eventually, you fall asleep again, too tired from the illness to continue to cry or feel anything.

Jihoon makes up his mind quickly. After abruptly hanging up the phone, he immediately gets up and goes through his own routine faster than ever, even taking 30 minutes off of his normal workout just to have more time for his own plan. After coming home, he does something a little out of character. He goes to the kitchen to cook something that isn’t chicken breast and white rice.

This surprises his roommates. Soonyoung tries to help him with the big pot of what was so far just stock and vegetables. He gets distracted easily, and it takes him a long time to cut up an onion. Jeonghan takes a picture of Jihoon and sends it in the group chat asking if this is normal behavior for Woozis. Seungkwan tries to taste it before the dish is ready and whines when his hand is met with a smack from a wooden spoon.

“This isn’t for any of you. Leave it alone,” Jihoon says in a stern voice.

“Wait, what? Then who is it for?” Soonyoung raises an eyebrow at him.

“Y/N, my girlfriend. She’s sick.”

The mood in the apartment changes. Now, Jeonghan is texting more furiously in the group chat about how Jihoon cares so much about his poor, sick girlfriend. Seungkwan now insists on tasting the dish the whole way through the cooking process to make sure it’s suitable for such refined tastes as his and yours. Soonyoung calls his mom and asks what the best thing is to cure illnesses. It becomes a whole big thing that has Jihoon a little bit annoyed but also grateful his friends care about you almost as much as he cares about you.

Jihoon’s morning and the better part of his afternoon off of work are then filled with surprise visits from Mingyu, Jun, and Seokmin who bring an array of dishes that could feed you for a month and Minghao who brings a special tea blend that he uses when he's feeling sick. Vernon sends a playlist of chill music for you to listen to while you recover, and Wonwoo writes a list of movies he recommends you watch to rest. Chan makes a special delivery of his grandma's famous kimchi, which has the rest of the boys groaning that they don't get any this time. Joshua sends the best essential oil wax melts so you can indulge in some aromatherapy. Finally, Seungcheol makes sure that Jihoon tells you that he can send anything in the world to your house using his card whether it be medicine or a treat from your favorite bakery or even a new designer pajama set to make sure you are at maximum comfort levels.

As he makes his way over to your apartment, Jihoon feels silly carrying a bunch of bags filled with various gifts from everyone on top of the soup he made that seems to pale in comparison. He curses Jeonghan under his breath for telling everyone his plan to bring you supplies, effectively making him the delivery boy because he is the only person who has the passcode to your apartment. He tries to call you on his way over, now adding his phone to the pile he was juggling. It rings a few times and then goes to voicemail. He tries again and meets the same outcome. He assumes that you’re resting; being sick for multiple days sounds exhausting which is why he is so willing to bring over everything he (and the others) could possibly think of to make you feel better.

Jihoon reaches your front door and knocks loud enough that you would be able to hear it from your room, but soft enough that you wouldn’t wake up if you were resting. He waits a beat before just typing the code and letting himself inside. He makes his way to the kitchen and sets down the various bags on the countertops. Only once his arms are empty does he realize the state of the apartment. He slowly takes in the dirty dishes and various random stuff left on the floor. The trashcan is full, and tea bags litter the countertops. There are tissue boxes everywhere, each one full of used tissues.

He walks slowly to your room and, opening the door, he almost couldn’t make out your sleeping shape on the bed. You’re curled up into a ball under many layers of blankets on one side, and on the other was a pile of clothing. There’s more clothing on the floor. Jihoon goes back to the kitchen and takes a deep breath. He meticulously puts all the food everyone prepared into the fridge, rolls up his sleeves, and decides to start there. He makes a list in his head of all the things he could realistically do in the few hours you would be asleep.

The next moment, Jihoon is elbow deep in soapy water scrubbing dishes and wiping countertops. He finds all the cleaning instruments and proceeds to sweep and vacuum. He fills a trash bag with tissues, tissue boxes, and food containers. He gently tiptoes around your room, gathering up the clothes from the floor, which he assumes are dirty, and putting them in the wash. The clothes on the bed, which he checks are clean, are now folded and put in a hamper for later sorting. He even has time to reheat his soup and make a pretty plating of it paired with some rice and a cup of some of Minghao’s herbal tea.

You awaken when you hear dishes clanking in the kitchen. Someone is in your home. You freeze until the noise stops and begin to get up from your bed. With your legs swung over the side of the bed, ready to stand and possibly defend yourself, the door opens slowly and in walks Jihoon with a tray of dishes.

He looks surprised, then flashes a big smile, then says, “Good, you’re awake. It’s time to eat.”

All you can do is stare at him in disbelief as he sets a tray of soup and rice and tea on your lap. He sits cross-legged in the empty space beside you and scrolls through his phone as if it's the most normal thing in the world.

“W…what’s all this?” you stutter out, utterly confused.

“Lunch,” Jihoon answers nonchalantly.

Looking at him beside you, you realize that there is indeed empty space on your bed for him to sit where there was once a pile of clothes. Tears appear behind your eyes when you look around at the spotless floor of your bedroom. You look at your boyfriend as one tear falls.

“Did you…”

“Yeah, it was a real mess in here.” He turns to look at you and uses his thumb to wipe the one tear from your cheek. “Start eating. I bet you haven’t eaten all day. How are you supposed to get better if you don’t eat?”

He was right. You take a spoonful of broth and bring it to your lips. It tastes wonderful. Alternating between tea and soup and rice, you feel fuller, and the heat from the meal eases your throat just a little more. Jihoon looks at you and sees how happy you look to be having a meal that wasn’t microwaved from a package. You are already almost done with the meal after only a few minutes.

“See, you were hungry, huh?” He teasingly shakes his head.

You lightly push your boyfriend's arm. You make a face, suddenly feeling awkward to be around him. “I thought you were mad at me.”

“What? Why? Because you lied to me for days and didn’t let me take care of you? Or because you canceled our date on the day of because you assumed I cared that we went out somewhere?” he starts sarcastically, “I actually hadn’t thought about it all day.”

“I’m serious, Jiji!” you try to whine but end in a cough. He’s laughing at you as you get a little frustrated.

“I’m seriously not mad. I wish you would’ve told me, but being mad won’t fix anything.” His smile is soft, and he’s looking at you with love in his eyes.

“I’m really sorry. I just didn’t want to worry you. I didn’t know it would last this long. Honestly, I don’t know what I have, and you probably shouldn't be sitting so close to me right now.” You weakly try to push Jihoon away, but he sits like a rock, not budging at all.

“I’m fine,” he chuckles, “The plague couldn’t even keep me away from you.” He leans to kiss your forehead.

All your muscles relax as the last few bites on your plate disappear. Jihoon takes the empty tray in one hand and uses the other to guide you to your feet with him. He wordlessly walks you both out of the room. You see that not only is the entire apartment clean, but there are small gifts left out on the coffee table.

“What is all this?” you ask your boyfriend as take a seat on the couch, waiting for him to put the empty plates and bowls from the tray in the sink.

He takes a seat next to you and rubs the back of his neck with one hand and avoids eye contact when he answers, “The guys heard you weren’t feeling great, so, of course, they had to help out, too.” He goes through and shows you the wax melts, medicine, and self-care products. He also tells you about your new stock of homemade meals from the best cooks in the group. You get really excited about the kimchi from Chan’s grandma. He sends you Vernon’s playlist and Wonwoo’s recommendations. He even shows you the text Seungcheol sent him about using his card for whatever you might need.

Everything is perfect for the rest of the evening that was supposed to be a fancy, romantic date night. It turns out that watching movies and listening to music while snuggling and talking is the best medicine for illness and the most romantic date you have ever been on.

[castiwls]

Hii

I was wondering if you could so something with a dean x reader where one of them gets attacked by a djinn and their fantasy involves the other person?

djinn - d.w

pairing; Dean x fem!reader

synopsis; A Djinn's coma causes Dean to come to a realisation

warnings; none

notes; Idk how i feel about the ending of this one

masterlist

Dean groaned as he squinted at the light snaking through the gap in the curtains. Throwing an arm over his eyes he turned pulling the covers up with him. How much did he drink last night? He hadn’t had a hangover this bad in years.

Deciding sleep was the best idea he pulled the cover higher and closed his eyes. The room was quiet for a few minutes as he lay still, his head still throbbing. 

“Dean. Come on you need to get up. You're going to be late.” Someone reached over and pulled the cover down despite his protests. A hand shook his shoulder briefly before he felt a dip in the bed. The hand which had previously been in his hair moved upwards and began carding through his hair slowly. “Dean, come on.” 

Dean frowned slightly. He knew that voice. “Y/n?” He opened his eyes slightly and stared at the person beside him in slight shock. You smiled at him, your hand continuing its movements. “You need to stop drinking at night.” Your voice was still quiet but there was a hard edge to it. “You promised you’d stop.” 

What was going on? This wasn’t normal…at all. Sure you’d been on his case about his drinking habits for ages but you’d never been this nice about it. Normally you’d just make some snarky comment about how he was drinking himself to an early grave before pushing him to bed.

He rubbed at his eyes sitting up slowly. He slowly took in his surroundings as his body seemed to finally wake up. This wasn't the motel. His eyes darted around the room for a moment before landing on you. You looked…different.

You looked happier. The stress lines which seemed to be prematurely forming were gone and those dark bags which seemed a constant under your eyes were gone. Satisfied that he was up you stood from the bed. “You have an hour till you need to go.” 

Dean frowned clearing his throat. The headache seemed to be subsiding. “Go where?” At his words, your frown deepened. A look of concern crossed your face. “The garage. You said you would cover a shift for Bobby remember?”

Dean quickly nodded. “Yeah, yeah sorry just not with it this morning.” You shook your head before leaning down to press a quick kiss to his lips before turning and walking out of the room. 

Dean felt his cheeks heat up at the affection. While he couldn’t lie that he enjoyed it, the action also caused warning alarms in his head.

You and Dean weren’t a thing. You’d always just been his best friend nothing more. He slowly stood and walked over to the drawers pushed up against the wall and pulled a few open till eventually he found his own stuff. He’d never seen this house before in his life yet as he looked around the room it seemed that he had lived here for a while. The bedroom alone had pictures dotted around, things he had no memory of.

The last thing he remembered before waking up here was being in a barn on a hunt with Sam and the real you. He rubbed his neck as he racked his brain. What had you all been hunting?

Suddenly it hit him. A Djinn. “Fuck. Fuck.” He kicked the leg of the bed in frustration. That son of a bitch had managed to get the jump on him. He needed to get out of this dreamland fast. 

After calming himself down and getting dressed Dean made his way through the house. As he’d gotten dressed he’d been thinking of a plan. He had to wake up his actual body somehow and then get out of the barn. So far though he had no idea how to do that.

His only hope was that you and Sam would realise that he’d been grabbed and go after him. 

After a few moments, he found himself standing in the doorway to a small kitchen. At the sound of his steps (fake), you turned to face him. “There’s coffee in the pot.” You gestured to the counter beside you before you went back to cooking. 

Was this really his fantasy? Yeah sure, maybe his feelings for you weren’t exactly platonic but he didn’t realise they went this far. While he knew he had to wake up part of him didn’t want to. For the first time in years, you looked calm. You seemed the happiest he’d seen as you moved around the kitchen, humming softly.

“So, um.” He cleared his throat as he leaned against the counter. “Any plans for today?” He cursed himself internally at how awkward he was being but he had to at least act like he had an idea of what was going on.

You pursed your lips for a moment before coming over to him. You stopped in front of him before speaking. “Not much. Probably just more wedding planning I guess.” You shrugged not noticing his expression. “Oh yeah, I was gonna ask if you were happy with the quote for the venue. They need a response by tomorrow.” You stepped back before reaching for two plates from behind him.

Dean stood still as he digested what you had just dropped on him. You were getting married. To him. 

“Uh yea. Yeah, it was nice.” He nodded. You smiled as you turned with two plates. “Great I’ll call them later.” 

Dean followed behind you as you walked over to a small table. He was getting married.

What else was different in this ‘fantasy’

You frowned stepping over a pile of you didn’t even know what. “He has to be here somewhere.” You whispered as Sam shone the flashlight around the old barn.

“Over there” Sam shined the light to a corner of the barn. You could just make out the shape of a person strung up. You and Sam had managed to get rid of the Djinn relatively easily, the hard part was finding his hideout. The creature hadn’t exactly been willing to talk.

You’d only managed to figure it out due to Dean mentioning to you before he left that he was going to a barn a few miles from the motel.

You both rushed over and began to untie him. “Dean! Hey Dean.” Sam shook his brother harshly for a moment. Dean let out a quiet groan before his eyes slowly opened. “Wha-where.” He stumbled over his words for a moment before rubbing at his eyes.

Y/n crouched down beside Sam and reached out to place a hand on Dean’s arm. “Are you ok?” 

Dean nodded. He slowly pulled himself to his feet stumbling slightly. You quickly reached out to steady him. Dean’s eyes flew down to where your hand rested on his arm.

His heart picked up slightly at the touch before he cleared his throat and looked back up to where you were looking back with a concerned expression. He cleared his throat trying to push the woozy feeling in his stomach away.

As the three of you walked back to the car he found his gaze falling on your left hand. Dean had never been one for marriage or even crushes for that matter but for the first time in his life, he felt himself longing for something which seemed so far out of reach.

[lupinqs]

CHAPTER TWO ━━ Silence and Static

☆ ━ pairing: hopkins!paige x oc (dani callan)

☆ ━ word count: 4.5K

☆ ━ warnings: nothing really, paige is just kinda emo lol

☆ ━ links: my masterlist, take me to church masterlist

☆ ━ author’s note: sorry this is such a filler and it’s boring but it’s meant to serve as a basis for paige’s perspective after her and dani’s fall out

THE START of senior year has a bitter taste that Paige wasn’t prepared for. She’s envisioned this time in her life in so many different ways—dominating on the court, coasting through classes with Dani by her side, enjoying the final months before the world outside St. Louis Park opens up to them. But reality always has a way of shattering things, leaving Paige to pick up the pieces of what’s supposed to be the best year of her life.

The ache in Paige’s chest is a constant reminder of what she’s lost—or more accurately, what’s been torn away from her without any explanation. As she sits at the edge of her bed, staring at her phone, Paige’s fingers hover over the message icon, the urge to text Dani overwhelming. She doesn’t know what she’d say; she just wants to talk her. But the memory of her and Dani’s last conversation stops any true thought or idea of communicating with the brunette. She was so hostile, so cold, so different from Dani—who’s always been warm and kind and true. And now Paige stares at the last message she received from the girl and it hurts her eyes to even look at.

Dani ❤️‍🔥

i’m going to camp, won’t have my phone

sorry

It was sent in early June, and that was it. No further explanation, nothing to ease the anxiety that had gripped Paige the rest of the summer afterwards. And now, Dani and Paige are both back, and yet, the aforementioned is more distant than ever before. The silence between them has grown thick, suffocating, leaving Paige alone with her thoughts and the static of unanswered questions buzzing in her mind.

With a heavy sigh, Paige tosses her phone aside and forces herself to get up and get dressed. She goes through the motions: pulling on her favorite UConn hoodie, tying her shoes, grabbing her bag. But everything just feels off. The hoodie’s too heavy, her shoes too tight, and the backpack weighs down her shoulders more than it should. It’s as if the world has shifted slightly, leaving her out of sync with everything around her.

As Paige trudges down the stairs, she finds her dad and Drew in the kitchen, the two of them already busy with their morning routine. The smell of bacon and maple syrup fills the air, though it doesn’t bring its usual comfort to Paige.

“Senior year, P!” her dad, Bob, chirps, grinning sideways at his daughter as he packs Drew’s lunch box. “You excited?”

Paige forces a smile. “Yeah, sure.”

Bob’s brows furrow slightly at her tone, sensing the lie beneath the surface, but he doesn’t press. Instead, he just hands Paige a piece of bacon, which she gladly accepts. “I’m sure you’ll have a good time,” he replies, clearly trying to be reassuring.

Paige nods, sending him a short smile before making her way over to Drew. He sits at the table, eating his pancakes. She ruffles his hair a little, and then kisses it lightly, saying, “Have a good first day, ‘kay? Better tell me all about it when you get home.”

Drew will be in first grade and he’s been bustling with excitement to start back up in school since it ended, having had a wonderful kindergarten year. Paige adores her little brother’s innocence, his love for learning. It clenches at her heartstrings a little bit, though—it feels like he’s growing too fast.

Drew sends his older sister a grin, saying with his mouth full, “I will, Paigey!”

She smiles back, this one reaching her eyes a bit more, before mumbling her goodbyes, Amaya sending a text telling Paige she’s here. No, Paige does not have her license yet—no, she doesn’t want to talk about it. She heads out the door, the morning air crisp. It does little to clear her mind. She smiles a little at her sophomore friend as she gets into the passenger seat, greeting her. Amaya grins back, though she’s clearly unhappy with the fact summer’s over.

When they arrive, the parking lot is already half-full, students milling about in groups, laughing and talking and probably complaining about the fact that school’s back in session. Paige isn’t offended when Amaya leaves her side to go to her friends in her own grade, bounding over to them happily. Besides, the blonde has already spotted Thaliah Sommers and KK Adams near the entrance, the pair waving at her with tired smiles.

“Hey, P,” KK greets. “Senior year, yeah?”

“Seems like it,” Paige replies, glancing at the building, lips pulled into a tight line. She doesn’t even bother trying to fake another smile, expression brittle at this point. Her friends don’t seem to care; they both look more than exhausted, their summer sleep schedules most likely not mingling well with the early arrival time.

“Can’t believe I have a first period,” Thaliah grumbles, wiping at her eyes. Truthfully, the girl looks as if she’s just rolled out of bed—sporting a sweatshirt and sweatpants, face bare. It seems as though senior year has made them all careless.

“Yeah, but at least you get out after fourth,” Paige reasons, shaking her head as she thinks of her own schedule. “I have all these random free periods between my classes, so I gotta stay here all day. I’ll prolly just end up bothering Coach during ‘em.”

“I’d hate that,” Thaliah agrees, scrunching her face up as the three of them begin to walk into the building, recognizing that class starts in a few short minutes.

Inside, the familiar sights and sounds of the first day of school surrounds Paige. Lockers slamming shut, freshman looking lost, teachers already reprimanding students. To her disappointment, Paige doesn’t feel a single ounce of excitement as she takes in her surroundings, instead only feeling an unfamiliar sheen of anxiety graze over her skin. She knows why. Lately, everything that’s wrong with Paige has led back to the same thing. Dani has always been her constant; though, now, it’s in a far different way than it was before. Dani seems to be the source of all of Paige’s problems, all of her recent negative feelings, the new emotions she’s been experiencing. The absolute lack of Danielle Callan has rocked Paige’s world more than most would believe possible.

And Paige has no idea whether it helps or not that her first class of the day is AP Lit—the only class she and Dani will have together the whole school year. When they were signing up for classes last spring, it was Dani’s idea to take it together. Dani had always planned to take it, but when she found out that none of their friends had that same idea, she needed someone. And that someone—always—was Paige. The blonde was hesitant, because, truthfully, she’s only ever heard bad things about the class. The teacher’s good—Paige knows that, she had her for English her freshman year—but, according to some of Paige’s older friends that have since graduated, the class is apparently a shit ton of reading and too difficult for her own good. Yet, because it was Dani, Paige had agreed. And the thought of spending that hour with Dani every single day was enough to make the thought of tackling Shakespeare and Faulkner bearable (especially knowing that Dani would be there to help her). But now, as Paige steps into the typical flamboyant English type of classroom, the reality of what happened over the summer hits her like a tidal wave.

Dani’s already there, sitting in the middle row, her light brown hair pulled up into a messy bun. She looks tired, shoulders slightly hunched and dark circles under her eyes, gazing vacantly at her desk. Paige’s heart twists a little at the sight. It’s not as if Paige hasn’t seen Dani at all since their fight—she has. They live right next door to each other, of course she has. But it still hurts all the same. To be completely cut off with little to no explanation by your best friend who you also happen to be hopelessly in love with is fucking painful.

Paige hesitates in the doorway, her feet rooted to the ground as her eyes stay on Dani. She wants nothing more than to go to her, to sit beside her like they always have, to pretend that everything is okay, even if it’s not. But something in Dani’s posture, in the way she keeps her eyes downcast, warns Paige to stay back and keep her distance.

“Oh, Paige!” Mrs. Donovan, the AP Lit teacher, calls out in excitement as her eyes land on her student. She grins brightly—a bit too brightly for the early hour, Paige can’t help but think—and gestures to a desk. The one that’s— “You’re right behind Danielle!”

Dani doesn’t look up at the sound of her name, doesn’t bother to acknowledge Paige’s presence at all. The blonde swallows hard, forcing herself to move. She slides into the seat Mrs. Donovan gestured to, the one right behind Dani, her heart pounding against her rib cage. From this close, Paige can see the tension in Dani’s shoulders, the way her fingers tap anxiously against the surface of the desk. Paige can only imagine how Dani’s feeling—but, still, she’s usually mostly accurate. Dani’s always been more introverted, and new schedules, new routines, and new people tend to make her anxious. Paige can tell she’s feeling that way right now. Because, despite everything, Dani is still Dani. And Paige will always know Dani. The blonde wants to reach out, to say something—anything—but the words only stick in her throat.

As the bell rings and Mrs. Donovan starts the class, handing out syllabi and talking about what to expect for the year, Paige’s mind strays far from the discussion. Instead, she finds herself staring at the back of Dani’s head, thoughts and memories circling through her head with unwarranted clarity.

JULY 2013

THEY’RE ELEVEN years old, and the summer sun blazes over them as Paige and Dani sit on the swings at the park near their houses. It’s a place they’ve been coming to for years, one of their constants. In fact, it’s actually where they first met.

The air is thick with the scent of freshly cut grass, mingling with the sweet aroma of the cherry popsicles the girls devoured earlier. Paige’s legs pump the air lazily, the tips of her shoes grazing the ground, while Dani swings a bit higher, her hair flying out behind her like a banner in the wind. The worn-out metal creaks with each swing, a familiar sound that blends into the background of their laughter and chatter.

“Race you to the top!” Dani suddenly shouts, voice filled with a reckless enthusiasm that usually belongs in Paige’s instead. Without waiting for a response, Dani leaps off the swing, her feet hitting the ground with a soft thud, making a beeline for the jungle gym.

Paige’s laugh bursts out of her before she can help it, and she scrambles to follow, heart pounding with the thrill of the chase. “No fair, you started first!” she calls, her words trailing behind her as she races after her best friend.

They reach the platform that hovers above the slide, the same spot where Dani broke her arm years before. Paige remembers it vividly—how Dani had cried, the way her elbow was bent all weird, and how Paige had held her hand the entire car ride to the hospital. The spot is a little scarred now, but it doesn’t stop them from sitting side-by-side, legs dangling over the edge as they survey their world from above.

From this vantage point, Paige can see so much more. The neighborhood spreads out before them like a patchwork quilt, each house a different square, each tree a different shade of green. The sun casts long shadows, making the world below them seem like a dream, distant and hazy. There’s a stillness in the air, a peaceful quiet that Paige—for once—isn’t the one who breaks.

“P?” Dani asks, her voice quiet, almost hesitant.

Paige hums in question, keeping her gaze out before her instead of on the girl next to her. There’s something in Dani’s voice that makes her brain short circuit a little, a seriousness that doesn’t belong in the carefree world around them. “Yeah?” Paige asks, trying to sound light, though a small knot of worry forms in her stomach.

“Do you ever think about the future?” Dani’s words hang in the air between them, heavy and laden with thought.

Paige turns to look over at her now, eyebrows furrowed in surprise. Dani’s never been the type to dwell on what’s ahead—in fact, she says it scares her too much to even think about it. Instead, she usually submerges herself in now, living in the moment, seizing the day with both hands.

“What d’you mean?” Paige replies, voice soft, almost afraid to shatter whatever fragile thing Dani is holding onto.

Dani shrugs, her shoulders rising and falling with a casualness that doesn’t quite reach her eyes. “Like… what we’ll be like when we’re older,” Dani elaborates, bottom lip pulled between her teeth. “We’re starting middle school now, and I always hear things about friends drifting apart. I just wonder if, when we’re older—like high school or something—if we’ll still be friends. Or if things will have changed.” Dani keeps her eyes out on the horizon, expression thoughtful as Paige gazes at her.

Paige feels an odd tension in her stomach at the thought of losing Dani, of the possibility of their friendship fading away. It’s too painful, too much that would be taken at once, to even consider. Dani is Paige’s constant, her anchor in a world that sometimes feels too big and too overwhelming for the eleven-year-old. The idea that they could ever grow apart feels like a betrayal of everything they’ve ever promised each other.

“We’ll always be friends,” she says with confidence. Because, in what world could they not be? “Nothing will ever be able to change that, ‘kay?”

Dani finally looks back at Paige now, her expression softening, a small smile tugging at the corners of her mouth. Slowly, the seriousness begins to seep out of her. “Promise?”

Paige doesn’t hesitate, reaching out to hook her pinky around Dani’s. It’s a childish gesture that fits the friendship between two young girls. But this time, it’s true—a vow that they’re both determined to keep.

“Promise,” Paige echoes, squeezing Dani’s pinky with her own.

As they sit there, side-by-side on the playground, the world feels small and manageable, just for a little while longer. And, here and now, Paige allows herself to believe that nothing with ever come between her and Dani—no matter what.

PAIGE BLINKS, the memory fading just as their promise did. It hurts all over to think about the fact that she was so sure that nothing would ever come between them, that their friendship was absolutely unbreakable. But now, here they are, strangers but not at all, bigger walls being built between them each and every day.

The weight of that lost connection presses down on Paige’s chest, making it hard to breathe. Her lungs flare in and out. She wants—needs—to do something, to find a way to bridge the gap between them. But she just doesn’t know how, the silence and static between them far too heavy. And the fear that she might never get the chance to again is almost enough to make Paige’s lungs go out completely.

Mrs. Donovan’s voice drones on in the background, but Paige can’t focus on the words. All she can see is the back of Dani’s head, the way her highlights illuminate her brown hair at certain angles, the way she shifts uncomfortable in her seat every now and then, probably feeling the weight of the blonde’s gaze tearing into her back. It’s almost as if an invisible barrier has been built between them, one that Paige can’t tear down no matter how hard she tries.

Finally, the bell rings, signaling the end of class. Paige watches as Dani gathers her things quickly, avoiding eye contact with the blonde as she hurries out of the room. Paige lingers there for a second, heart sinking slightly as she watches Dani slip out the door, her back rigid, her steps quick and purposeful.

Paige feels a mixture of relief, dread, and—oddly enough—excitement. Relief that first period is over, dread at the thought of facing Dani again. But, at the same time, excitement about seeing Dani again. Because if this is the only time Paige can see her, if AP Lit is truly all Paige will ever be able to get out of the brunette again, she’ll take it. As pathetic as it sounds, she’ll take as much—or as little, she supposes—of Dani as she can get.

THE FOOTBALL game is the first big event of the back to school season, and Paige stands there in the student section with Thaliah and Amaya. It’s not like Paige has any particular interest in football; of course, she’s always preferred basketball. But she’s been in need of a distraction, something big and exciting enough to pull her out of the unfamiliar melancholy that’s settled over her, and it seems like a high school football game under the lights is the perfect choice.

The student section is alive with energy, the kids screaming and chanting things that they probably shouldn’t be as the game kicks off. Paige does her best to lose herself in the excitement. She screams along with her friends, sweating slightly under the setting sun, grabbing a Hawaiian lei excitedly when KK offers her one. It’s beach theme tonight—Paige tried to fit into it, wearing sunglasses and some beach button up with a white crop top, the lei helping to add to it.

But as Paige’s eyes drift along the players, along the field, along the track—her eyes land on her and it’s almost as if any and all excitement that had settled inside of Paige is whisked away, just like that. Dani stands on the sidelines, between the line of football players and the cheerleaders, her camera clicking away. It’s not like this is a new thing—Dani did this last year, for yearbook, and Paige shouldn’t be surprised to see her doing it again this year.

The Callan girl has always been passionate about photography, and it’s one of the many things that Paige has learned to love about her through the years. Paige knows that Dani has a way of almost losing herself in the click of her camera, finding beauty in the smallest details, the most mundane moments captured and crafted into something beguiling. Dani used to show Paige all the photos she’d taken, scrolling through the storage on the camera. The two of them would huddle over the device, and Paige would help her best friend pick the best photos for whatever project she was working on in yearbook.

And then, of course, there’s the other memory card that Dani has—the one that Paige knows is labeled “P.” It’s simple—all of the scattered photos that Dani has taken of Paige over the years, all put together on one little storage device. Dani told Paige several times that it was her greatest piece of work, merely because Paige was the star of it. Yet, for a while, Dani didn’t let the blonde look into it, keeping the memory card hidden away. But, eventually, Paige’s curiosity got the better of her and she’d found the card and scrolled through the photos. There were some from when Dani first got into photography, when they were much younger, with chubbier cheeks and more crooked smiles. A good amount was the photos Dani got of Paige court-side, some for the yearbook, some just reserved for the two of them. And then there was the candid ones—Paige remembers scrolling through them, and the look in her own eyes that stared at Dani from behind the camera… God, she remembers thinking that it seems she was whipped from the very beginning.

Paige’s heart clenches at the thought of that memory card, and wishes she was a photographer so she could have one of Dani. She’s got a fair few—or, well, a lot—of photos of Dani on her phone, but it’s just not the same. Faintly, Paige wonders what Dani’s done with the “P” card. Maybe she threw it away, crushed it into tiny little pieces, tossing it into the trash like she did her and Paige’s friendship. Or maybe—maybe—she’s kept it. Paige hopes it’s the latter; she imagines Dani, late at night, thinking of Paige like Paige has been thinking of her, and then going through the photos of her, wishing she could take back everything she said.

Paige almost rolls her eyes at her own thoughts. She’s almost sure Dani threw it away.

And then, the blonde is pulled out of her own head by the sound of the crowd erupting into a series of cheers, the band beginning to play. She glances at the field, then at the scoreboard, realizing she’s just missed a touchdown. Thaliah and Amaya and all the students around Paige are jumping up and down, chanting for Hopkins. Paige joins in, trying to drown herself in it, doing her best to put her mind to rest and just have some fun—she’s always been so good at that; she wishes it wasn’t so hard to do recently.

When the final whistle blows, signaling the end of the game, Hopkins pulls through with a narrow win. The crowd is excited for their first victory of the season, screaming those “start the buses” and “who’s your daddy” chants that Paige has always found ridiculously hilarious. Eventually, everyone begins to disperse, and Paige stands with Thaliah and Amaya, the three of them following the rush of students leaving the bleachers.

Amaya quickly tells Paige and Thaliah that she has to go to the bathroom, rushing towards the building. The other two girls stand around patiently, people watching their peers. Unsurprisingly, it doesn’t take long until Paige’s eyes once again find Dani’s frame. The brunette is packing up her camera gear, hauling a small duffel on her shoulder.

Thaliah follows the blonde’s gaze, nudging her gently. “You should go talk to her,” she says encouragingly, nodding towards Dani.

Paige shakes her head, her voice barely above a whisper. “She doesn’t want to talk to me.” It’s true; she remembers their last conversation—the cold look in Dani’s eye, the forced indifference, the river she rushed to drown Paige away.

“You’ve been miserable,” Thaliah says, point-blank. Paige’s eyes shift to her left, where the tanned girl stands beside her, brows furrowing in almost offense. “Don’t side-eye me like that—you know you’ve been miserable. And I think you’ve got nothing to lose these days when it comes to Dani, so you might as well just try.”

Paige doesn’t answer, eyes merely locking back onto her best friend. Without thinking, almost like her legs are moving of their own accord, the blonde starts walking towards Dani. She doesn’t know what she’s going to say, doesn’t know if Dani will let even let a word slip out of her mouth. But Thaliah’s right: it’s worth a shot. Paige can’t leave without even trying.

As she approaches, she watches Dani glance up, eyes meeting Paige’s. It lasts for only the briefest of seconds before Dani plainly averts her gaze, eyes anywhere but on the blonde walking up to her. Paige feels her heart stutter against her rib cage, threatening to sink at the sight, but, nevertheless, she keeps going, only stopping when she’s a few feet away from the brunette.

“Dani,” Paige murmurs, her voice soft, almost pleading. It’s all she can say; she doesn’t know what else to say.

The basketball player watches as her best friend’s body goes rigid, her hands stilling on her camera bag. It takes a second, but eventually Dani looks up, meets Paige’s gaze, brown on blue. There’s an unnameable emotion swirling within the Callan girl’s irises, and Paige wants nothing more than to step closer, to look deeper in them, to decipher exactly what’s going on in her best friend’s head. But she doesn’t. Paige stays rooted in place. And, for one, stupid moment, she believes that Dani might actually say something, that maybe this could be the first step in their repair.

But it doesn’t last.

“Dani!” multiple voices echo the name from the pair’s right. Paige turns to see Beau Hudson, still clad in his football gear and eyeblack, grinning and waving at Dani—his girlfriend, the blonde thinks, sickly—beckoning her over. He seeps with the same overconfidence he’s had the twelve years that Paige has known him, and it makes her blood boil over slightly. By his side is Serena Corren—a cheerleader that also happens to be Beau’s best friend, who’s famously known for her sharp tongue and dismissive attitude—also grinning and waving. Serena and Beau stand with a group that’s more than excited and impatient for Dani to join them.

Paige’s stomach twists at the sight. It’s clear that her best friend has integrated herself into this new crowd, one that Paige has always found superficial and unkind.

“I have to go,” Dani mutters to Paige, not meeting the blonde’s eyes. She slings her bag over her shoulder before hurrying off to her new friends, leaving Paige standing there, aching all over.

Paige watches Dani go, feeling like the weight of the world is pressing on her shoulders, weighing her down. She wants to scream, to cry, to do something to make Dani see that they don’t have to be like this, that they can fix whatever has gone wrong. But she can’t. So, instead, she just stands there, staring, missing her best friend.

Yes, Paige misses her. God, she misses her so much that it fucking hurts—it hurts her insides, her outsides, her bones, her skin. It makes her feel all wrong. Every part of her aches with the absence of Dani Callan, the loss of everything they’ve had. She misses Dani’s smile, the gleam in her eyes when she’d look at Paige, the giggles she’d let out whenever the point guard made a stupid joke. She misses the way Dani used to make her feel—alive, whole, like she could do whatever she wanted, whenever she wanted, as long as Dani was by her side.

But now all of that’s just—gone. And that’s clear as day as Paige watches Beau Hudson wrap his arm around Dani before pressing a firm kiss to her mouth.

She’s going to be sick.

Paige feels a hand on her arm, a head resting on her shoulder. It grounds her a little. Thaliah mumbles, “It’s gonna be okay, P.”

Paige doesn’t have the heart to say it, but she knows that’s not true. There is nothing okay with the fact that Dani is slipping—or, she supposes, has already slipped—through her fingers. There is nothing okay with the loneliness and pain that comes with it.

Paige doesn’t really know if anything will ever be okay again.

[justananxiousweirdo]

CAN YOU DO JOOST X AGGU X READER FLUFF HC / IMAGES?? PLEASE IM OBSESSED

YESSS OFC I CAN (hopefully)

Side note: I appreciate everyone who’s been interacting with my channel. I love you guys :)

Joost x Aggu x Reader HC

Joost absolutely loves cuddle time. Anytime you or Aggu are laying or sitting back Joost always jumps at the chance to lay with you. Your and Aggu’s camera rolls are filled with pictures of Joost snuggled into either of your sides. He loves to lay his head on your or Aggu’s chests. Whenever he lays on Aggu Aggu will play with his hair soothing Joost to sleep.

Aggu’s the type to play a claw machine or carnival game a thousand times if you or Joost see a prize you like. That man will be concentrated as fuck trying his hardest to get you or Joost some stuffed animal that probably costs five bucks but Aggu spent thirty just playing the damn game over and over again.

After begging the boys to bake with you over and over they eventually gave in. You cheered as the three of you headed out to grab a few missing ingredients. As soon as you got back home you raced to preheat the oven and get started. Within five minutes all hell broke loose. The kitchen was an absolute mess, they’re was flour everywhere, Joost had dumped a bowl of dry ingredients over top of Aggu’s head because he thought it would be funny. In retaliation Aggu poured the rest of the bag of flour on Joost, but the second you tried to scold them they both declined to team up against you. Both boys decided to grab the closet dry ingredient to them and completely covered you. For the rest of the night the three of you had a food fight and got no baking done.

They both have a million pet names they use. They have nicknames both in English and their native languages. Aggu usually calls you shantz, liebe, Prinzessin, Shöne, or mein leben. He usually calls Joost babe, prinz, Süße, Kuschelwanze, or liebling. Joost usually calls you perziken, liefde, or Schatje. He usually calls Aggu Aggie, honing, or knap. If you don’t speak German or Dutch it took a lot of begging from you for them to tell you what the nicknames meant, obviously you had an idea but you were never certain until they finally told you.

They’ve both made songs for you and each other that they’ll never release because they like to keep some things private and they think it’s more meaningful that way. And if you make music as well you do the same for them.

They’re both the type to ask for five more minutes. You’ll wake up and not want to just lie in bed all day so you’ll try to stand up just for both men to hold you down muttering something along the lines of “five more minutes” or “its too early”.

You three have a lot of movie and game nights. Either you three cuddle up on the couch watching a movie (that took twenty minutes for the three of you to agree on) with blankets and snacks. Or you all let out your competitive sides and get out some cards and poker chips, kisses are also accepted as a form of currency in your guys’ game nights. After all it isn’t about the money it’s about totally destroying your boyfriends in every game you play. They always accuse you of cheating, but that’s never the case, esp when Joost runs out of Monopoly money fifteen minutes in and pays rent with small kisses. Who are you and Aggu to disqualify the blonde from playing?

You three always have the most fun on dates, you go to a fancy dinner, a walk in the park, get some ice cream, that sort of thing. It’s almost always a simple date but you three somehow always manage to make it the funnest night ever. Every date tops the one before it.

Haters definitely get to Joost, he doesn’t like seeing comments talking about how much people don’t like him so sometimes after Joost has been scrolling through those kinds of comments he goes to you and Aggu for comfort, after all you two are the only two who make him feel truly loved and safe.

After Joost got disqualified from Eurovision he made it your three’s hotel room as fast as possible and just collapsed on the floor crying. When you and Aggu made it home to see a puffy eyed and red faced Joost you both knelt on the floor next to him doing your best to soothe him until he could speak. As soon as he said what happened Aggu threatens to march down there and beat the shit out of the people who hurt his boyfriend.

The last two are a little sad but I hope I did good. I don’t get to write a lot of fluff because I don’t think I can do it very well but I’m such a sappy person, a true hopeless romantic.

[marleyybluu]

Four and Counting

husband!Oscar Diaz x fem!black!reader

Word count: 4.4k (oops)

Warnings: everything is fluff, the cutest couple alive, another pregnancy, hints at abortion (but supportingly?), Oscar being the cutest fucking husband, self-indulgent asf cant lie like I want be in love like this

if i missed any lmk

AN: yall do not know how long this mf has been in my drafts omg I finally finished. This fic is just drowning in love. No smut 🤷🏾‍♀️. A bit rushed in certain places but it all fits pretty well in my opinion. this is not the end of the series but its like the end of the main chapters. there will be lore on the couple obvi, updates on the kids and the family as a whole bcus i am obsessed. hope yall enjoy.

You didn't know how it happened, you blinked and soon there were four. You had four kids running around your home filling it with innocent joy and laughter, and the occasional attitude. It was a full house and a busy life, but it could be enjoyable. You'd become a stay-at-home mom. At first, you weren't sure if you'd be able to manage, you loved your job a lot and worked extremely hard for it but with your growing family, your kids needed you more.

With Oscar opening a second restaurant you thought it'd be a good idea to bring up what's been gnawing away at you and he tells you that he's behind you no matter what path you choose. You put in your letter of resignation and bid your co-workers a teary-eyed farewell with promises to visit as much as they can. You had to admit it was a nice break, you didn't have to wake up as early, you weren't on your feet as much and the house was nice and quiet for a few hours when your children were either in school or at daycare. But then you had baby Rosie and your house had returned to a screaming, hollering mess.

She was a loud one and very expressive, babbled and cooed to anyone who would listen. "And then what happens after that?" You say laying next to her gently stroking her hair. She kicks her feet with excitement and responds in her usual baby language. "Oh my goodness." You respond. You could do this all day. You hated to admit it but you missed the baby stage so much and you were grateful for your little one. You'd been lounging around all day, only getting up to shower when she had fallen asleep and the occasional time when you needed to grab her bottle.

You pepper her chunky face in kisses and she squeals with happiness. "Que hermosa." You giggle. You two are so wrapped up in your world you don't even hear when the door unlocks and Oscar strolls in, he decides to check in on you since everything at the restaurant was going fine today. He notices the obvious vacancy of your presence downstairs and stumbles into the kitchen thinking you were feeding Rosie but he was wrong. He hears his baby's infamous noises from upstairs and smiles following the sweet noises. He creeps in on you two.

His head lolls to the side and rests on the door frame. He'd seen you like this many times (clearly) and it never got old. The way you lovingly interact with each child at any stage in their life, it was sweet to witness you give the same sweet eyes to Rafa at his big age as you did when he was a baby. Just a gentle reminder that he chose the right woman to marry, the best one to make a mother.

Rosie turns her little head and screams when her eyes land on her father. "Hola, mi corazoncito." He coos entering the room matching the same excitement as his baby which causes her to become even more riled up. He scoops her up and holds her in the air and all you can do is watch and grin like the Cheshire Cat. He brings her down and kisses her cheeks. "Cómo estás, mi mariposa?" He asks Rosie and she nuzzles her forehead in his cheek. Her nonverbal way of saying she missed him. Oscar takes his place next to you on the bed. "How are you, mama?"

You pucker your lips and he smiles dropping a kiss. You pout at how quick it was but quickly subsides when he gives you a forehead kiss. "I'm good. Sleepy. Hungry. Missing you."

"Missed you too, that's why I came home. And I brought some food from work."

You squinted. "Who cooked it?"

He chuckled. "Jason."

"Yes!" You fist pump. "Jason makes the best fucking food I swear."

Oscar's head seems to tilt even more, he's insulted by your statement but you smile sheepishly placing an encouraging hand on his shoulder. "Not as amazing as you do." He rolls his eyes and kisses your temple. Rosie babbles as her little reminder that she's still in the room. "No one forgot you chica" He affirms giving her some more smooches. "Let's go get mommy her food."

You sit up and stretch; some much-needed cracks are heard via your aching bones, and when your arms come down, you feel much looser and less tense than before. "It's okay, iré contigo." (I'll come with you.)

The three of you plop down the stairs and you part ways as Oscar heads to the kitchen while you shuffle to the living room and drop onto the couch, your lounging was short-lived when the doorbell rang. You huff getting back up on your feet. You swing the door open with a mean mug on your face until your eyes land on your mom and your features immediately soften.

"Hi, Mommy." You smile reaching out for her. "Hi sweetie, how are you?"

"I'm great," You pull her inside and close the door behind her. "What are you doing here?"

She shrugs off her jacket and hangs it up on the rack nearby, her shoes slip off her feet and she places those next to Spooky's on the mat. "Came to visit, figured you'd need some... company..." She trails off and— not so subtly— stretches out her neck to see if she can spot the baby. "Mhm." You say crossing your arms, you call bullshit.

"She's in the kitchen with Spooky."

And just like that, your mother leaves you in her dust. You hear her high-pitched, "Hiiiii GG's babyyyyy, helloooo." And you can't help but smile. Your mom always seemed to become happier with each grandchild you produced.

You begin to feel left out when you hear all the commotion in the kitchen so you decide to join them. Your daughter has your mom's nose in her small fist while your mom blows raspberries in her little tummy, she erupts with laughter and you catch a glimpse of Oscar with nothing but heart eyes for his baby girl. You sneak over to him and slide your arms around his abdomen, he drops his arm over your shoulder and draws you close. He plants a kiss on your head. The microwave beeps behind you signalling that whatever was in there had finished heating up. Your eyes widen when the aroma of cheese hit your senses. "Is that lasagna?"

He nodded. "Yeah. He made a little dish for you, told him you've been craving it lately."

You squeal with excitement as you take the hot dish out of the microwave, you set it on the counter and danced over to the drawers in hot search for a fork, your successful in finding one and greedily stick it inside the soft noodles that were jam packed with delicious ingredients. You take one bite and practically faint at the taste.

"Just needs one more thing." You think out loud, you hustle over to the pantry and grab a bag of barbecue chips, you snag a handful and crack them in your hand, sprinkling them on top. Oscar stands there... confused.

"Girl, what the hell is that?" Your mom asks equally appalled.

You shrug and take another bite. "It's good though." You muffle with a full mouth.

"I love you." Oscar sighs and you laugh at his adoration for anything you do, you blow him a kiss before taking another bite. You don't see it but your mom has her eye on you with a very interesting theory brewing in her head. Your husband's phone rings and he excuses himself to answer it leaving you alone with your mom and Rosie, who is quiet and happy on her grandmother's chest, her little eyes slowly closing with sleep.

You try your best not to make too much noise while you reach for more-

"Are you pregnant again?"

You nearly choke on your saliva at the ridiculous question. You quickly shake your head. "No!? Are you nuts? I just had her and she is the last one." You assure but your mom isn't believing it. "This little concoction says otherwise."

You roll your eyes. "I just... like pasta and chips... together."

It did sound ridiculous.

"Since when?"

"Like... a month ago..."

She sucks her teeth. "Mi amor, I'm telling you, I think you're pregnant."

This was insane, this was an insane conversation to be having. You were one hundred percent sure there was nothing and no one in your belly-- just the mere thought of having two under two was giving you the heebie-jeebies. "I'm just saying-"

You groan like the irritated teenager you once were, "Ay Mama, no más charlas de bebé, por favor." (No more baby talk, please.)

She agrees to ease off the topic but it remains in the back of her mind.

-- --

Later that day after Oscar's gathered the others from school, you sneak out of the house to do some grocery shopping. It was a bit of time for yourself, a time when you didn't have to keep your eye on your tiny little humans. You go through the aisles for the essentials and when that's done you browse for treats and snacks for your kids (that you and Oscar will eventually munch on as well.)

You cautiously approach the next aisle that is stacked with condoms, contraceptives and pregnancy tests. You meant to move, your hands ready to push the cart forward but your feet are firmly planted on the floor. You sigh and turn in, quickly grabbing a box and dumping it in the cart as though it's not for you. "She better be fucking wrong." You mutter to yourself.

-- --

With all kids fed, bathed and in bed before twelve it allows you to have the bathroom to yourself for a while. You wedge the knuckle of your index finger between your two rows of teeth, you stare at the box and sigh. "Please prove her wrong." You whisper to no one in particular. You pop open the box and rip open the wrapping of the test. One original and one digital. You sit on the toilet and do what you've done a hundred times, you pee on the sticks and set them aside until the timer goes off.

You clean yourself up and wash your hands, you know better than to just stand there and watch the sticks waiting for that fate-sealing answer but you go against yourself and stare. You're in a trance until there's a knock at the door, it startled you and you clutch your non-existent pearls for dear life. "Que?"

Oscar asks, "You good? Didn't need company tonight?" He's referring to your commonly shared showers which, now that you think about it, is probably one of the reasons you're in this predicament again!

"No, it's not that. I'm just..."

You huff and unlock the door swinging it open with displeasure on your face, your arms crossed as you nod over to the tests on the counter. His eyes follow your actions and pop out when he sees them. "How-"

"Mom said it was weird that I ate the lasagna like that."

He chuckled. "Didn't want to say anything." 

You whine saying, "It's not funny, I just thought it was a change in my palette or something, I mix random foods all the time. I-" You searched for every excuse you could find. Oscar's face softens at the worry in your voice. "I just had Rosie." You sigh sounding depleted. You turn your back to the tests when you hear that all too familiar sound. You squeeze your eyes shut, if you don't look you won't know the answer and you can go about your merry way. Your husband offers to look for you and leans over. You hear the quietest gasp he's ever uttered and you know. You spin around to look at them yourself.

Positive. Both of them show positive.

You look up at Spooky and he's already looking at you waiting for your reaction so he can curate his own. "How do you feel about it?"

You shrug. You truly didn't know, you didn't even have words. Your throat was dry. You pick up one of them and look at it. And you feel nothing. Empty. Just waiting for a sense of gratitude to come across and for some reason, you can't seem to produce it. You put the test down and leave.

Spooky's still standing there with his heart in the pit of his stomach. Maybe he should've listened to you, that two was enough, and then three and four. He's after you, right on your heels as you enter your bedroom. You sit on the bed and fall back onto the sheets, you cover your eyes and shake your head at yourself and him. "I just had Rosie." You repeat to yourself. And then it happens. A tear slips and as quick as you are to wipe it, he knows you like the back of his hand— your breathing gets choppy and choked, you sniffle. The bed dips beside you and the sound of the sheets ruffling as he lays down.

"Háblame." (Talk to me)

You take a deep breath. You can be honest. "I don't know how I feel. I'm not sad but I'm not happy. I just hoped Rosie would be a little older. They all have good age gaps and- Oh god, what if they don't want another sibling? And Rosie and I spend so much time together, they just got used to her-- Emilia was so clingy when I had her, she felt so left out and-and-"

Oscar presses his hand over your thigh. "Cariño. Respirar. Por favor.

You breathe shakily. "It's okay not to know how to feel. If this is not what you want... I'm here for you, your moms here... the kids are here. We have more than enough, Sí?"

You nod. He reaches over and pulls you into him, you rest your forehead on his chest while he rubs smooth circles on your back. "We have some time for you to think about it right? It's your world mi amor, we're just living in it. I got you no matter what."

"Spooky."

"Mhm."

"Thank you."

He smiles and kisses your head. "It's my job baby."

— — You'd been hiding your belly from everyone, even the kids. It was easy for the most part because you only wore baggy clothes and they made you look a little large anyway but then there were not so subtle signs— like the heavy breathing from doing just about anything, and your walk? Oh, your walk was not normal no matter how hard you tried. So you decide to come clean to your kids and other close family during a little gathering that Spooky's brother, Cesar, was hosting. Cesar was the only person who knew and you two asked if it'd be okay to announce it tonight.

He was fine with it, excited actually.

Your hands shake. You were cautious in deciding on having this baby, it took you a while to feel anything. At first, it was uncertainty, did you want another? Would you be crushed if you didn't have it?

But as the weeks passed you couldn't help but fall in love with the growth, the bigger you got the giddier you became. Modelling in front of the mirror any chance you got, and when all the kids were asleep you'd talk to your belly and giggle with every shift they made.

"Listo?"  He asks and you nod confidently. Oscar whistles over to Cesar giving him a thumbs up. Cesar turns down the music to gather everyone's attention. "I just want to thank everyone for coming out, it's been a while since we've all been in one place, right?"

The crowd mumbles in agreement. "But it's great to see everyone in good health and good spirits—" He raises his Corona bottle and the crowd follows with their drinks (including the kids and their juice boxes) "Salud." He smiles.

"Salud." The crowd repeats. You clear your throat and enthusiastically say, "Oh let me see if I can get a picture. Everyone gets in."

They shuffle into one pile as best they can, you grab your phone and hold it landscape, you press record and say, "Alright everybody in... great, now saaaay... Y/n and Spooky are having another babyyyy!"

There were collective gasps, the word "what!?" Being thrown around in every language. "Excuse me!?" Your mom hollers. You unbutton your cardigan and turn to the side having worn a tight dress on purpose. "Surpriiiiiise." You sing out.

"I FUCKING KNEW IT!" Jasmine screams stretching her arms out for you, you gasp and playfully smack her hand. "Not in front of my kids, puta!"

She tells you to shut up and hug her, your mom joins in and soon the children and in that moment it hits how loved and supported you are by everyone around you. This was your village and it was a damn good one too.

Oscar's friends dap him up and congratulate him. They hug you as well and whisper that they hope it's another girl. They loved spoiling your daughters. Anything they asked for the boys were sure to buy it no problema.

"Well, actually," You begin to say. "We know what we're having."

Rafa, your oldest comes up to you. "Is it a boy?" His eyes gloss over with the hope that you would say yes, he'd been hoping that Emilia (your third) was going to be a boy but he lucked out. You had an idea. You hunch over to match his eye level. "You see that cake over there." You whisper and he nods. "Papi and I were going to cut it, but I think you should get the first slice."

He shrugs and you walk him over to the white cream frosted cake. You and Oscar help him hold the knife and carefully slide the blade into the spongey treat making one incision and you help him make another. He pushes the knife under to take the slice out and plops it on his plate, he reaches for a fork when he looks down to see the inside was blue.

Nobody spoke. Nobody moved with the understanding this was his moment. He looks up at you. "You're having a boy!?"

You nod with tears spilling over and ruining your makeup. "I am."

He puts the plate down and hugs you tightly and that's when the crowd goes wild. "Thank you, Mommy." He sobs which makes you cry even more. "Oh, you're welcome sweetie."

— — Nine months had sped past you and it seemed as if it was just yesterday that you found out you were pregnant. Now, you lay on a hospital bed, covered over by a few blankets to help with post-partum shivers, your jaw rattling and fingers dancing involuntarily. But that wasn't your main focus.

Oscar hovered over you staring at the sleeping newborn in your arms. He made the cutest noises while he nuzzled against your chest. Your finger ghosts over his nose and he reacts by moving his head and sighing. "Are you sick of me already, mi hijo?(my son)" You joke nudging him with your nose. "You get used to her." Oscar chimes in and you suck your teeth hitting him as hard as you could. "Cállate culo."(Shut up, ass)

"Hitting me in front of my son?"

"And I'll do it again."

He smiles and leans down to kiss you. "You know I like you a little feisty, mami."

You sigh, so in love with your new baby, in love with your husband— just filled with overpouring affection. You can't stop staring at your new son and your husband couldn't stop gazing at either of you. He'd been in this room over and over and he swore up and down you made it look so easy, that you looked like a goddess bringing new air and life into this world. Even though you thought you looked like a monster from the swamp.

Oscar tells you in a loving tone. "You're doing an amazing job, seriously, you... you're just amazing."

You blink rapidly to keep tears from spilling over. When you met this man he was so rough and tough, such a brute that it seemed impossible to get him to even admit that he liked you, but under all that fake-cold persona, was the gentlest giant and the biggest sweetheart you'd ever met—a man who spreads nothing but positivity around you and your children.

"I'm so happy, I met you." He mutters. You were his wife, the mother of his children and his best friend rolled into one and that's all he wanted out of this life. You look up at him with glossy eyes. "I'm happy I met you too."

You share a kiss as a tear slips out, you just can't hold them back any longer. He kisses your forehead as his thumb swipes over your cheek. Your attention is drawn back to your son when he begins wiggling in your hold, you press your nose against his hair taking a whiff of that fresh baby smell. As you soak in the presence of your child, your husband's phone buzzes against the fabric of the diaper bag, he looks over and your mom's name catches his attention. He looks to you for some sort of permission and your brows furrow together. "It's okay."

He rushes over to answer, and just then your nurse walks in with a smile on her face. "Just came to check on mommy and baby." She announces.

"Ok... yeah, I'll meet you guys downstairs... bye." Oscar hangs up and looks over at you. "Your parents are here, with the kids. I'll just be back okay?"

"Mhm." You hum. He gives you a quick kiss before he speeds out of the room. The nurse smirks as she helps you adjust yourself into a somewhat comfortable sitting position, asking you if you'd like your son to be put back in the bassinet to which you respond yes and she gently takes him. "I apologize if this is forward but... I've seen a lot of couples in here and let me tell you, I've never seen anything like you two. He is so attentive."

You giggle. "Thank you. I just got really lucky with him."

A few minutes had passed and she had finished her check-up letting you know that she'd be back in a bit for another check-in. Once she left that's when your family, quietly, barged in. Oscar approaches you first with a sleeping Rosie in his arms and you happily reach for her and coddle her in your arms. Rafael, Elliana and Emilia gently charged over to you, shuffling off their shoes and finding their places on the bed with you. You greeted them as best as you could, with restricted movement all you could do was reach for their faces. Your parents and Oscar stand in the background of it all observing you in your motherly nature and Oscar can't fight the grin that has been plastered on his face since the day he met you.

"Baby." Emilia chimes in drawing everyone's attention to her now. "Yeah, mira, mommy had the baby."

Rafael seemed enamoured by the presence of his new sibling. He loved his sisters, you knew that, but by the looks of it-- this would be a special bond. "Rafa, would you like to hold him first?" Oscar asks.

He nodded eagerly and readied himself by sitting up straight and folding his arms. Oscar removes your son from his bassinet and carefully places him in Rafa's arms. The baby was a bit squirmy, upset that he'd been disturbed but with the soothing 'shhhh' from his mother's lips he settled down. Your two girls surround their brothers with curiosity.

Emilia giggles. "Hi, cutie."

"He's so tiny," Eliana mutters. Your parents finally make their way over to you after letting you have your moment with the kids. They congratulate you and your dad holds up a Chipotle bag and you beamed. "Thank you, this hospital food sucks." You whisper.

They attempted to take Rosie from you but you assured them it was fine, having missed her snuggles anyway. "Want me to feed you?" Your husband asks and you snicker shaking your head. "Está bien papito, I'll eat when I'm ready. But thank you."

— — After all the kids had their turn holding the baby their attention spans had turned to you and their father, telling you everything that had happened since you left the house.

"And then Ellie licked the cookie and put it back in my bowl," Rafa whines and you hold back a laugh. "Eliana you do not do that, that's gross."

She shrugs and nuzzles closer to her grandfather on the couch who is causing a ruckus with all his snoring. Your mom nudges him awake and he hits his famous line, "I'm not sleeping, I just closed my eyes."

"Think it's time for us to go." Your mom says. "Um.." Rafa chimes. "Is it okay if I stay?"

"I- yeah, I guess so." You answer. Oscar says that you'll keep Rosie since she has now found a new sleep space in his arms. Your mom carries a sleeping Emilia and your dad carries Eliana on his back. They say their goodbyes and are out the door.

— —

The room is so quiet you could hear a pin drop. Rafael had fallen asleep on the couch while Rosie, who'd only woken up to ear and fell back into slumber, lay under her older brother's arm. You sigh contently as you gaze at them.

"Did you ever think when we met at that laundromat, that we'd be here?" Oscar mumbled as he held your baby boy, tracing his finger along his little nose. You turn to him. You shrug.

"Maybe with one kid... two.... But not five." You joked. He chuckled.

"Did you?"

He nods. "I knew you were gonna be my girl from the moment I picked up that sexy red bra you dropped-"

"Spookyyyy." You gasped gently hitting his arm.

He laughs. "Que? Man, once I saw those cups I started barking."

"You are so fucking stupid."

He shrugs. "I know. But I'm stupid in love with you."

You playfully rolled your eyes at his corny, yet sweet, line.

"I'm stupid in love with you too."

if you liked this fic feel free to like this fic. comments and reblogs are appreciated. hopefully, I'll be back a whole lot sooner. peace and love

tags: @darqchilddaydreamz @realhotgurlshit @skyesthebomb @librarian1002

Who might be interested: @miyahmaraj @bigenergy777 @educatorsareslutstoo @missdforever

[mostly-marvel-musings]

Hi, I am slipping into your Kinktober requests again, if that's okay with you! I'd love to request something for Hugh Jackman this time, as I keep seeing more and more of him, and I'm happy to drool over that fantastic man with your stories! 👀

Kissing down every inch of your body they possibly can, showing how much they love you. + "Don't be shy baby, I love the way you moan my name.

I'm preparing to melt into a permanent puddle of goo here as I'm happily waiting to see what you'll come up with here. Again, thank you for everything you share with us, and I'm looking forward to reading it all! 🤍

Kiss away your insecurities

A/N: Thank you for requesting this, my darling! Hope you like it :) Special thanks to @stark-ironman for helping me with this idea 💛

Pairing: Hugh Jackman x F! Reader

Warnings: 18+ smut themes, angst, floof. Body image issues, self-doubt and negative talk.

.

You were still out of breath.

Heart pounding wildly against your ribcage thanks to the activities you and your boyfriend were up to ever since he got home. Even though the shared sounds of passion had died down, they were now replaced with your louder insecurities, forcing you to curl away from the man and head to the bathroom to clean up.

Hugh frowned as the door slammed shut with a little more force than usual. Concerned, he knocked on it asking if you were okay.

“Uh, yeah. Fine.” You responded, blinking back tears that began rapidly gathering. Your inner thoughts screamed you didn’t deserve all of this.

“Mind if I join you for a quick shower, darling?” Hugh called again after hearing the water running. Something you had a habit of doing every time you were overwhelmed with emotions.

“Actually I’m going to be right out. You know I have the—the thing early morning.”

Cursing yourself to have to lie, you scrubbed your body forcefully, glad the tears streamed down with the hot water and your shaky voice was somewhat covered.

As you stepped out of the bathroom, you were met with a concerned Hugh, arms crossed over his chest.

“Are you okay? Did I do something wrong?”

“No! Why would you think that?” You faked a laugh, going around him to get dressed for bed. Knowing fully well you weren’t fooling your boyfriend.

“Because you’re avoiding me.”

Giving him your most reassuring smile that you could muster, you shook your head as you slipped into one of his well worn t-shirts, getting onto your side of the bed.

“No it’s just, I have to wake up early tomorrow and I wanted to get a quick shower in. I’m fine. Really.”

He was silent for a while as he joined you in bed, watching you fluff the pillows before you turned away from the man to switch off the bedside lamp.

“You can tell that to someone who believes your lies, darling. Tell me what’s wrong. Please?” He tried again, switching the lamp back on and reaching out for your hand.

“Would you just drop it, Hugh?” You snapped, hating yourself for it as you turned the lights out again, pulling the blanket over and hiding yourself in its fluffy depths, hoping it would somehow cover your imperfections.

Your mind was still flooded with all sorts of thoughts about the way you looked, and how any day your little daydream would end and Hugh would realise what a mistake dating you was.

What was he even with you? You were far from perfect. You had curves that no matter what you did wouldn’t go away. You got trapped in your own head quite a bit, you were moody, and ten thousand other things that would push you away from the ‘ideal girlfriend’ title.

You lived in constant fear that he’d wake up one day and decide he was done with you. Then what would you ever do?

.

The next morning you woke up before Hugh did and went for a run, hoping it would clear your head.

It worked until you got a few heads turning in your direction, it wasn’t uncommon considering who you were dating; it was still overwhelming sometimes. You heard giggles and judgemental scoffs, possibly they were commenting on the way you looked.

It made you want to disappear. A sense of your deepest fears winning made you rush home, discard your jacket and ready to retreat into your room for the rest of the day. That was until your eyes fell on the breakfast spread that lay waiting on the table to your right.

“Morning sunshine! I thought I’d whip up your favourite breakfast today since you—hey, what’s wrong?”

You didn’t realise you had teared up again until Hugh rushed to your side with worry.

“Why are you with me?”

“What do you mean?” He frowned.

“I mean why are you with me? I don’t deserve any of this. You could be with anyone you want, I don’t understand why—”

He stepped in your line of vision, silencing your little ramble before gently wiping your tears away and leading you to sit on an armchair.

Wordlessly holding your hand against his chest, he took a deep breath in, gently coaxing you to follow. When you did, you could feel your erratic breaths returning to a normal slowly but surely. Just his presence on difficult days like these was calming.

“Talk to me?” he nudged, hands still clasped reassuringly.

“I just feel like you could do so much better than this…than me. You’re so—I mean, I am—”

Struggling to complete the sentence, you couldn’t help the crack in your voice as you avoided his gaze, shifting nervously on the chair.

“Beautiful? Kind? The best thing to have happened to me?” Hugh tilted your face to meet your eyes again, his own shining with all the love and adoration reserved just for you.

You wanted to believe him, so badly, yet the voices in your head got loud enough to make you doubt every single thing.

“I won’t allow you to talk much less think such lies about my amazing girlfriend, you know. She’s lucky her boyfriend immensely enjoys demonstrating just how much she means to him.”

You smiled at that, much to Hugh's relief, shaking your head.

"If you'll allow me to show you, my love."

With that he picked you up, leaving no room for any further protests from your side. Kicking the bedroom door shut with his foot, his lips descending onto yours in a kiss that effectively quieted down your fears and filled you with a renewed sense of assurance.

As the kiss deepened, your anxieties melted away, giving way for all the love that you held for this man, who by a miracle from the universe, was all yours. When you eventually broke the kiss after what felt like hours, he continued demonstrating all that he'd promised, making sure to whisper words that held such honesty, you wholeheartedly believed them.

This was nothing like you'd ever experienced before. This was more than just sex, it was worshiping, cherishing and much more. He held you close, accepting every curve, every scar, every last freckle as his own, showering you with all his love. You hadn't felt so loved, so respected, so seen, ever before in your life.

When you were filled to the hilt with his manhood, a moan that you trying so hard to suppress, escaped. Quickly covered your mouth with a hand, you quieted down, embarrassed.

"Don't be shy baby, I love the way you moan my name."

"I'm afraid I'm too loud." you whispered.

Hugh tutted, interlacing your fingers and firmly locking your hands over your head, securing them in their rightful place as he began moving in your sopping heat.

"Not loud enough. Let 'em hear. Let 'em hear who's making you feel good, sweetheart."

Hot and breathy against your ear, his honeyed voice was enough to turn your insides to mush, encouraging you to not hold back anymore.

Soon, the walls of the house echoed with your shared sounds of passion, the intensity of them evident as you reached your highs together. Bodies trembling with wanton need as you drew the most sinful moans out of each other, fully alive in the moment.

As your climax crashed over you, it seemed to wash away any lingering negativity and uncertainty you had previously felt, making you sure of your dreams being actualized.

[thetriplets3]

Can I send a request? Maybe reader x matt cuddling and reader lays head on stomach or switched around? Just cuddling fluff pls I need it

if you want more fluff/ comfort written send as many requests as you want to my inbox its open (and empty)

❝𝐡𝐞𝐫𝐞❞

it's been a week to say the least. between work and school i haven’t had a second where my mind wasn’t occupied with the next thing i needed to do. i haven’t been able to sleep, tossing and turning unable to get comfortable as i let my worries eat away at me. i’m exhausted. constantly running around doing a million things at once just trying to please everyone.

what made my week even worse was that matt and his brothers went home to boston so i was only able to call and facetime him and we couldn’t talk for long because of the time difference with me getting home from work so late and having to be up early in the morning. it sucks. all i wanted when i came home from work was to see matt and be with him and i couldn’t.

with a heavy sigh i straighten up from being slumped against the steering wheel finally deciding i should go inside and get ready for bed just to repeat the same cycle tomorrow. fumbling with the lock i groan, eyes heavy with exhaustion i make my way inside haphazardly discarding my shoes, jacket, and bag by the door. my sore tired feet carrying me to the kitchen to grab a glass of water. i sit on one of the barstool scrolling through my stories as i drink my water. i can’t help but feel sad when i see matt and his brother’s stories. they must’ve taken a trip to vermont, matt’s favorite place. it warms my heart seeing him there knowing how much he loves it there but i wish i was there with him. refilling my glass of water i shut off the lights and head to my room.

opening my bedroom door i still. in front of me i see my room dimly lit up by the tiny string lights the litter my walls and matt under my covers with a big soft smile adorned on his lips. my mouth forms a gentle pout at the scene in front of me as my eyes begin to water. just what i needed was here.

“hi sweetheart”

“what are you doing here? i thought you were just in vermont?

“that would be nick on my story. i knew you had a long week i wanted to fly back early and be with you. now you gonna come cuddle or just keep staring?”

“ah ah gotta change no outside clothes on the bed you know this. i’ll be quick”

changing into comfier clothes i make my way to the bed, to matt whose propped up against my headboard with my duvet lifted eager for me to crawl under and join him. he waste no time and pulls me towards him letting me get comfy. i lie my head on his stomach with my arms wrapped around his torso holding on as if he’s disappear if i let go. one of his hands rests in my hair gently massaging it while the other dances up and down my back relaxing me even more.

“i missed you so much you have no idea how happy i am that you’re here. i love you baby”

“anything for you honey i love you. get some rest i’m here i’m not leaving”

taglist: @antisocialties @iluvmatt @dwntwn-strnlo @fake-coolbeans @opheliaofficial07 @angelcake-222 @oneirophobic @strniolo @lollibumblebee @ssturniolo @20nugs @strniolo @luvsturniolo

[xothatnerdykid]

love you like oxygen

Your pro hero boyfriend has barely been home the past few weeks because of his hectic schedule, so you decide to surprise him when's patrolling one night and steal some of his time (as well as a few kisses). Aizawa Shouta x fem! reader. Sliiiight NSFW (definitely suggestive, bordering on foreplay). 1.3k words.

Dating Shouta could be hard sometimes. His life is a constant juggle between being a UA teacher by day, a pro hero by night, and a single dad to 23 kids on top of being your boyfriend. So, of course, you understand it can be challenging to find some quality time with him.

Although you’ve only been together for less than a year, you don't really go out on dates anymore. Because when you used to eat out at quiet restaurants or take a walk through the park, he usually couldn't make it through the whole date without getting an urgent phone call about school or his hero work, and then having to excuse himself. Eventually, you get so tired of having to finish your dinner by yourself or go home alone that you start spending most of your free time waiting for him in his apartment.

Most days he gets home at a somewhat reasonable hour, all things considered, and you happily spend your time together eating the dinner you cooked for him and just lounge around and talk until you fall asleep. Then you like to lie in bed in the morning and watch him gear up and get ready, even helping him shave or share a coffee together before he has to kiss you goodbye while you start getting ready for work, too. It’s nice, you think, to share all these mundane moments of everyday life with him.

But he’s been coming home so late the past few days that you’re usually already asleep. And the only thing you wake up to is a plate of breakfast on the table and a little text telling you to have a great day. 

After two weeks, you decide you’re tired of missing him and get off work early to surprise him. 

You briefly wonder if it was even a good idea to come looking for him when he’s out on patrol, given the hectic (and dangerous) nature of his work. You didn't want to get in the way or distract him too much from anything important he might be doing, especially not if it meant putting anyone at risk.

So you call Hizashi to ask if he might know where your boyfriend is, and you tell him about your little plan. He says it should be fine if you catch him by the time he’s usually on break, and he helps you track Shouta’s patrol route for the night. You thank him before you hang up and head out. 

_________________________________________

Although you had meant to surprise him, you suppose he’s just too good at his job to let you. You startle a little when he catches you, and you turn around to face him. He’s hanging upside down from a fire escape with his goggles obscuring his eyes. 

You don’t doubt that it’d be an intimidating sight to anyone else; this tall, imposing man, blending in so well with the dark and moving so quickly and quietly in the shadows. But seeing him silhouetted against the glow of the city lights with a small smirk playing on his lips just makes you realise how much you miss him. And how much you want to show him that. 

"Fancy running into you here, stranger." His deep, raspy voice comes out teasing and flirty. 

A warmth spreads over you at the sound and you take a step closer. “Hey there, hero. I could say the same to you.”

"And to what do I owe the pleasure of this lovely surprise?"

You smile softly, reaching up to touch his face, tracing his jawline. “I was hoping you could help me with my little problem.”

He chuckles, his upside-down grin nearly disarming. "Whatever it is, I’m all yours.”

“You see, my boyfriend hasn’t been coming home for the past few days and I've been feeling a little lonely lately because of it.” You pout a little.

“Is that so?” His hand finds its way to the small of your back, pulling you a fraction closer. The simple gesture, tender and affectionate, sends shivers down your spine. You lean into his touch, the feeling of his hand against your skin comforting. “Do you want me to keep you company then?”

You nod, dipping your head slightly so your lips softly brush against his. The anticipation builds like an electric charge in the air. His closeness is intoxicating and you feel your heart race, each beat like a drum echoing your desire for him.

“Like I said,” he breathes, his thumb lightly grazing your lips. “I’m all yours.”

Your hands trail down to his eyes to pull his goggles down, and you smile at the look on his face. “There you are, handsome.” 

You grab his jaw and kiss him like you’ve been wanting to all week, molding your lips against his with a burning desire to be closer. Your hands find their way to the nape of his neck, fingers tangling in and fisting his unruly hair until you feel him groan.

"I've — missed you," you murmur against his lips between kisses, savoring the taste and warmth of his mouth.

"Kitten, you have no idea how much I've missed you," he growls, his voice low and husky. You reach for him again, but he pulls away. You’re about to ask why when he flips himself right-side up, landing effortlessly on the ground to tower over you. 

“I haven’t been able to stop thinking about you all week.” He pins you against the alleyway, both his palms flat against the surface beside your face, and he draws you closer until you're flush against him. “Thinking about all the things I want to do to you.”

Your breath catches in your throat when you feel his knee slowly creeping up between your legs, and he crashes his lips into yours once more. 

The taste of him is deliciously exhilirating, the sensation of his skin against yours a heady concoction that sends your senses into a whirl.

"Then why — don’t you—" You try to gasp, “Stop — thinking — and just —”

Unable to form a coherent thought anymore as he kisses you senseless, you reach behind you instead to touch his hand and trail your fingers up his arm, over his chest, and down his abs, feeling his toned muscles through the fabric of his shirt. You hook your finger through his belt to pull him closer. 

Feeling his hips slot against yours knocks the air from your lungs. 

“Shouta,” you can’t help but whine and roll your hips against him, desperately seeking friction. 

His hands grip you tighter as he groans into your mouth. He stops to look at you — your dark, blown out pupils, chest panting and face flushed with desire — and grabs your jaw, smirking. “You know I can't resist you when you're like this, right, kitten?”

You smile slowly through the haziness of the desire clouding your mind. 

“Tell you what. Why don’t you go back home first,” He leans in to press a lingering kiss behind your ear, stroking your hair. “And I promise I won’t be far behind?”

“You’re no fun,” You protest petulantly, fingers clutching at his shirt. “Can’t you take a day off from saving the world just for one night?”

He smiles at you softly. “I’m sorry, love, for today and all the days before that I haven’t been around much,” He takes your hands and brings it up to his mouth, looking into your eyes as he kisses your knuckles. “I intend to be plenty fun when I get home later. How’s that sound?”

Your cheeks warm at his words and all the things they make you imagine. “Don’t take too long, then.”

“I won’t. I’m counting down the seconds as we speak.”

With one last stolen, tender kiss, Shouta watches you leave before he heads back out into the night. The ache of having to say goodbye again is softened by the sincerity in his promise of making up for lost time and the eager anticipation of being in his arms soon.

(The noise complaint you get from his neighbor the next day is a small price to pay, and it makes him laugh a little when you show it to him, so…even just for that…)

[everythingmp3]

𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐬𝐰𝐞𝐞𝐭𝐞𝐬𝐭 𝐬𝐞𝐜𝐫𝐞𝐭

Tess Servopoulos x fem!reader

AO3 / part 1

after spending the whole summer apart, you finally get to reunite with Tess. nobody has any idea what you are up to as you spend a whole week together.

authors note: thank you to everyone who gave me such lovely feedback on crossing lines! a few people asked for a continuation, so I went back to this story and I am really glad I did bc it’s close to my heart and I had a lot of fun developing it further. this one is heavy on the romantic aspect bc I wanted it to be joyful and light and to function as a kind of escape for anyone who might need it! I put a lot of thought and time into this, it’s a labour of love, so I really hope you guys enjoy reading it <3

warnings: minors dni. smut (both giving and receiving), large age gap bc reader is in her early 20s Tess is in her early/mid 40s

word count: 25k

as predicted, the two weeks that Tess stayed in your hometown went by in a flash.

fourteen days sounded like a decent amount of time, but the number of hours that you actually spent together one-on-one was very limited. you tried your best, some evenings you´d go over to the place where she was staying and got lost in the heat of the chemistry you had, during those moments it was pure bliss, Tess was a devoted lover and made you feel wanted in ways you´d hardly allowed yourself to dream of before, but you could not stay the night more than a few times, since the excuse of “sleeping over a friend´s house” would have made Joel suspicious if used it too often. it frustrated you that you were so restricted in your movement with her, that you couldn´t go out and get lunch because you knew too many people around town who also knew him, it was hard not to grow frustrated those days because you wanted nothing more than to spend entire days with her, free of the anxiety of who might see or judge you.

one rather nerve wracking event happened a week into her stay: Joel suggested that you should all get dinner together. it was not as unbearable and awkward as you´d have expected, but still, it was hard to sit across the table from her all night pretending like you didn´t wanna touch her or kiss her or look at her with more than polite interest. for her it was just as hard to keep her gaze on him when he talked, while you were so close, your skin glowing beautifully, the memory of its feeling against hers clouding her mind with desire. towards the end of the dinner Tess excused herself to go to the bathroom because she had to catch a break, the heat of the summer day mixing with the heat of her need for you, leaving her a total mess by the end of the night, even more greedy for the taste of you the next time you both found yourselves alone. the one perk of being unfree in your expression of affection was how violently you made up for it when you reunited, more than once you´d sat on the edge of your bed at night, touching the bites and marks she´d left on your inner thighs, your chest, all the places where nobody would be able to see, a satisfied grin on your face when you pressed down on the sensitive spots and felt a slight pain, the lingering impact of her lips, her teeth, her hunger. 

at times it did feel strange to lie to your father´s face, especially when he came home from hanging out with her, talking about what they´d done and seen, blissfully unaware of the things you two had done the night before; the constant sneaking around and hiding of your true feelings did make it harder at times to fully enjoy the feeling of being so obsessed with each other, that early stage of no amount of touch being enough, and yet you still soaked up all of the warmth and joy you could during the few times where you could just lay in bed together and forget about the outside world. 

the morning she was going to drive back home, you told Joel you were “seeing a friend for breakfast” and then spent a very emotionally charged hour with her, which looking back almost embarrassed you a little because you´d sobbed quite violently in her arms once it was time to say goodbye. you usually didn´t cry in front of others but you couldn´t help it that day, you´d grown so comfortable around her and she´d made you feel so seen for who you really were, that being separated from her for weeks on end seemed like a nightmare. she put on a slightly braver face, holding your hand and kissing your tear stained cheeks as she told you in an earnest manner “we´ll see each other at the end of August, alright? you´ll come visit and we´ll do whatever we want, but in the meantime you should enjoy your summer. you better have some fun stories to tell me when we see each other again, okay?”, followed by a brief moment of silence and a tentative nod from you, trying to cling to the knowledge that you´d eventually reunite. 

the days after Tess´s departure you tried your best not to let it show that it had affected you, but you knew you weren´t concealing it well, so you pretended you were a little under the weather and spent some time in bed, sulking and being dramatic about your lovesickness. 

almost immediately after Tess was back home you two developed a routine. it was clear as day that she was not a great texter so you called each other about every other day, mostly at night because then neither of you were in a rush, laying in bed and catching each other up on what you´d done that day, her offering some gossip about coworkers, you offering some about people from high school you´d run into, asking more personal questions that you hadn´t thought of before, comforting each other whenever you´d had a rough day, teasing each other a lot, making the best of your less than ideal situation of being miles and miles apart.

generally, your calls were calm and relaxed but during one of them, when it had gotten particularly late and her voice was even raspier and lower in your ear than usual, the sudden silence on your side and your labored breaths gave away what you were trying to do, she paused for a moment before she asked “are you getting off to my voice right now?” which made you stop immediately, but after a brief laugh she added “no come on, it´s okay, let me help you out there”. from the moment you had first kissed her, you had never been shy with her about how much you liked her but in moments like that it did take her a moment to believe it, that you were truly that into her, enough to get turned on just from hearing her speak. it was both endearing and thrilling to her, to be lusted after that overtly.

she´d never talked anyone through it over the phone but Tess liked a challenge, so she thought about what you might want her to say and continued speaking, telling you how pretty you looked when you´re all worked up and desperate, what she´d do if she was there next to you, her tone soft and sultry, so she didn´t have to keep doing it for long, after a while of getting into it she could hear a sound that signaled to her that you were done, a sense of cockiness swelling up in her. a moment after you said “you should feel really good about yourself”, she smiled which you could hear from the way she spoke, of course she knew what you meant but she liked teasing you, “oh yeah? why?”, “why? Tess. I miss you so much that I´m doing shit like this” she laughed then, “well, we´re in a similar spot then”, “are you saying you jerk off thinking about me?” you teased back, “take a wild guess sweetheart”. 

that night you had various feverish dreams about her, inspired by what had happened over the phone mere minutes before you fell asleep, which left you spaced out and distracted the next day, haunted by the visions you´d had of her mixed with the actual real life memories that were utter torture to think of. it happened pretty often in the following weeks that you had to ask someone to repeat themselves because you were busy thinking of her; Tess on the other hand was eyed curiously by a few of her friends and colleagues because they sensed an unfamiliar ease in her, she smiled more than usual, she was less irritable and snapped at people way less frequently than before, to a point where her closest friend straight up asked “okay. who is she?” over dinner one night because she knew that Tess could only be magically changed like that by a pretty intense infatuation. 

towards the end of summer it was thankfully rather explain to Joel why you wanted to go back to college early, you made something up about getting into the groove of things before classes started and he was just glad to see you eager to get back to your life there because the year before you´d sometimes seemed a little fed up with everything. as long as you were happy he was happy but of course, the true source of your happiness might have changed his mind in that instance. lucky for you, he had not caught on about the fact that your enthusiasm had absolutely nothing to do with your academic life. the plan you and Tess had come up with was a simple one: you´d fly back to your college town and from there you could take a train to Tess´s city that would take about two hours, which meant you´d get there in the early evening if everything went according to plan. 

she told you she´d park just down the road of the station and the moment you spotted her from a distance it reminded you of the first time you´d met: she was leaning against the passenger door the exact same way, but this time a bright smile crept onto her face as soon she saw you walking towards her. what she did then was very typically Tess, she didn´t walk or run over to you but let you come close to her, those subtle displays of dominance that suited her well, watching your slightly tired but utterly joyful expression as you approached her, waiting until you were only a few feet away from her to finally stand up and open her arms. the second she did that you dropped your bags and swung your arms around her neck, immediately nuzzling your face against her neck and making a sound of excitement as she picked you up with her familiar strong grip, lifting you from the ground for a second, wrapping her arms tightly around your back as you breathed in her scent, her hair soft against your face, the fragrance of her shampoo reminding you of the times you´d been in bed with her and had gotten an intoxicating whiff of it. “my sweet girl” she said as she kept holding you. neither of you wanted to let go, so you stayed like that for about a minute, wordlessly embracing and touching, eyes closed, melting into each other, instantly as comfortable as you´d been the last time you´d been that close two months prior. eventually you let go and faced each other, somehow there was an agreement that you´d wait to kiss until you could do it properly, passionately, in private, so you held her hand instead and waited for her to speak, beaming at her, overjoyed by the thought of having a whole week with her ahead of you, trying to soak up the bliss of that long awaited reunion, the sun casting you in a golden glow that matched the warm feeling you both felt in your chests. 

she looked at you with soft eyes and touched your cheek with her free hand, caressing you the way she´d done countless times before, you breathing out deeply as you leaned into it because that simple gesture alone put your whole body at ease. “you´ve had a long day, right? are you tired now?” a subtle sound of concern, you smiled at her, still processing that she was actually in front of you again, somehow even more beautiful than you  remembered, her hair slightly ruffled from the breeze, her face bronzed and freckled from the weeks of sun before, “well I was tired until like a minute ago, but now I´m wide awake”. she grabbed you by your waist then, enjoying your flirting, holding onto you, “good, that´s what I hoped. so how about we go home first, you can freshen up, relax, and then we can go get some dinner, how does that sound?”, “perfect, ideal” you said, leaning in to kiss her cheek while whispering “I missed you, so much”, an obvious statement but you felt the need to remind her, her hands lingering on your back as she let you press your lips against her face, “I missed you too. I´m glad to have you all to myself this week”. she took your bags from you and put them into the trunk, joining you in the car a few seconds after and it felt good to be back in that seat next to her since that was where your whole relationship had started, where you´d spent the first few hours of knowing each other, it reminded you of the fun you´d had with her during the beginning of summer, the nervousness before you dared to go for it, so it was a cute full circle moment, to be right back in that same spot.

“ah I missed this, your shameless staring” she said, grinning as she pulled out of the parking spot and felt your gaze fixed on the right side of her face, you´d gotten comfortable and were eyeing her with clear desire, unwilling to mask any of it. “well, you might get sick of it by the end of the week”, she shook her head, “no, never. oh by the way, here, I thought you might need something like this”, she directed your attention to the drink holders between you, which held two of the refreshments she´d seen you go for most often. “didn´t know which one you´d prefer right now so I just got both”, it was one of the things about her that had won you over from the start, her way of paying attention to even the smallest things, her way of reminding you that she cared about the details, “oh thank you, that´s really sweet”, you said as you took a big sip of one of the cold drinks, but Tess never wanted any praise for her little acts of service because she saw it as the most natural thing in the world, so she changed the subject. 

“so, be honest, was it weird? lying to him about all this?” she knew that it was no small thing, to lie to Joel that blatantly about going back to college when you were actually visiting her for a whole week, so she made sure you were still fine with it. “oh it was okay. we get a little pissed off with each other when we spend so many weeks in one house, so I think that helped with me not feeling too bad”, she nodded, an amused expression “right, I get that, good to have some distance now I assume?”. “yeah for sure. but not just because of him, I was honestly just glad to be leaving home now”, that intrigued her, “oh yeah? how come?”, a sympathetic tone, you thought about it “I don´t love spending that much time back where I grew up. now that I have my own life, coming back there sometimes makes me feel so out of place and weird.. like running into old friends and seeing all the places I used to spend my time, it can get suffocating after a while, all those memories and old feelings”. Tess made a sound of agreement, “yeah I get that, I avoid going back to my hometown, I used to do it more when I was younger but I only do Christmas now, that´s it. sometimes you just outgrow a place and it feels odd as hell to return, huh?”, you nodded, “exactly yes”, she hardly ever talked about her family so you knew it meant something for her to share that information, you didn´t press her further, still, it made you feel understood and seen in a way.

“so, this might be a good moment to say thank you for letting me come here” she tried to wave it off but you insisted “no, really! I can´t tell you how nice it is to be able to leave early without having to go back to my everyday life already. you´re kind of saving my life by giving me this in between, I already feel lighter right now, like I can breathe out again”, she grabbed your hand, squeezing it a little, “well I´m glad, I want you to let go of everything and just enjoy this week okay? I´ll take good care of you” she meant it, she felt protective over you and wanted nothing more than to offer you an escape from whatever might be weighing on you, “oh, I´m sure you will”, you said, a suggestiveness to your words that made her laugh then, “okay, I wasn´t just talking about that kind of care but sure, that too”. there was palpable tension between you, you could both feel it as you kept glancing at each other, Tess was wearing something you hadn´t seen her in yet, the temperature was warm but not too hot so she´d opted for black pants that hugged her body perfectly paired with an oversized navy t-shirt that left her forearms exposed, you were also dressed in something that was unfamiliar to her, which left you in a similar state of wanting to get your hands under the fabric already. a charged silence hung between you as she pulled into her street and interrupted your shared moment of fantasizing, “this is it” she announced, pointing at her house as she looked for an empty spot.

“okay wow...” you said, clearly stunned. the street was picturesque: tall buildings, beautiful architecture, five story houses with little iron balconies out front, a row of lush trees on either side of the street that cast pretty shadows onto the sidewalk. the area seemed both urban and peaceful, it was very close to the center of the city so there were little shops and cafes further down the block that were busy during that time of day, she was pleased by your reaction, the nervousness about having you stay with her was fading by the second. “you know what. I think I should just drop out and come live here, be your trophy girlfriend” you joked as you both exited the car and you got a good look at your surroundings, she laughed as she got your bags for you, charmed by your enthusiasm, secretly into the idea of having you with her for good  “enticing offer, truly, I´ll think about it”

as you walked up the stairs to her apartment, you noticed how nice even just the hallway was, the ground floor had mosaic tiles, the stairs seemed about a century old, sturdy and almost like something you´d find in an old library, you turned to Tess who was walking behind you, “is it possible that you´re hiding the fact that you´re kind of rich?”, which she could only laugh at, “I wish. rent-control, baby, that´s the reason I´ve been living here for ten years, I couldn´t afford places in this area if I moved here now. but feel free to believe that I am secretly rich, I don´t mind”. 

by the time she let you in, you were slightly out of breath, steading yourself against the wall as she dropped your bags on the floor and closed the door, giving you only a brief second to recover before she grabbed your face with determination and kissed you, deeply this time, her hands holding your face as she pushed you further against the wall, eager, kissing you in a way that was not elegant or pretty but messy with all the pent up tension, her taste still familiar to you, even after all those weeks, hot and slightly sweet against your tongue, your skin tingling where her knee brushed yours as she had you against the wall, a series of desperate but pleased sounds leaving both of you until you eventually got dizzy with the heat of it and separated, smiling bright while you stood there breathing even heavier than before.

“so” she said, her lips a deeper shade of pink than before, “I think I should give you a tour of your home for the week now, right? be a good host”, you nodded, smiling to yourself, realizing that you hadn´t even taken a look around yet. Tess lead you to her bedroom first to drop off your stuff there and it was just what you´d imagined it to be: minimal but elegant, nothing showy, no bright colors, but an impressively large bed for one person with very comfortable looking sheets, the same dark wooden floor you´d already noticed outside the room that gave her whole space an expensive, chic feel. there was not much clutter at all, she was obviously a neat person, you could tell that she took good care of the few belongings that she cherished, no clothes over her chair, no trinkets on the dresser, nothing left laying around where it didn´t belong. still, the room had a distinctly warm and inviting feel to it, you could already imagine how well you´d sleep in there and she was glad to read the enthusiasm in your expression; Tess was only human, so naturally she´d worried about what you´d think of her place, if you´d feel comfortable staying there for a while, but those thoughts were quickly replaced by relief when she saw no hesitation on your part as you moved around, quite the opposite, you seemed elated.

Tess quickly showed you where the bathroom was but didn´t have much to say about it, so instead she lead you to the room that took up most of her apartment: her living room that was connected to the kitchen, a bright open space, one that made it easy imagine her throwing dinner parties there, which she probably rarely did, but still, the understated chicness of the place lent itself to fantasies. the thing that struck you most about her apartment was that it got a ton lot of beautiful natural light, it had tall ceilings and big windows, so during that early evening hour you were spoiled with a glow of orange-golden sunlight, two windowed doors opening up to her balcony, which looked like a lovely place to spend summer nights. it was very obvious that the apartment belonged to a person who was not that easy to figure out just by taking a look around, it fit her personality, that you wouldn´t have been able to guess much about her just by judging the interior design, other than the fact that she had good taste. 

eventually Tess reached the end of what she had to show you, so she got comfortable on the couch and patted the space next to her, looking up at you with an inviting smile, but as you stepped closer you shook your head and lowered yourself onto her lap instead, your arm around her neck as she put hers around your lower back to steady you, glad about the fact that you still seemed just as physically comfortable with her as you´d been in June. 

you held onto her as you smiled at her, taking a look at her pretty eyes from up close as you said, “I just realized I haven´t asked you a thing about the stuff that matters yet. so, how are you, really? is it still stressful at work? you mentioned something last week, I was kinda worried” you purposely put on the tone that a wife using to comfort her tired spouse after a long day at work, it charmed her, she thought about it for a moment as her hands wandered up and down your back.“oh I´m okay, sweetie, really, it´s getting better now. for a minute they were just giving me more and more shit to do because I get things done faster than the others. maybe I should start slacking off a little.. but yeah it´s good to have a break now. the thought of you coming here kinda kept me going last week” that made you feel warm but also evoked some sympathy, you exaggerated a little with your pity as you answered  “poor thing” brushing a strand of her hair out of her face, eyeing her with tenderness, “I wish I could have been here and cooked for you or something, helped you out a little” she smiled imagining it, “hm, I´d have liked that”. “well I´m here now, I´ll help you relax this week, don´t you worry” your hands on her shoulders then, squeezing a little, gently massaging her muscles there for a moment, a pleased sigh from her as she shut her eyes, “god, I forgot how sweet you are..” you stared at her, tilting your head, “forgot?? I guess I´ll have to leave more of an impression this time”, a grin as you said this, still moving your fingers over the fabric of her shirt, she nodded, already fully back under your spell again, “feel free to overdo it, yes”. 

she didn´t have to tell you that twice. you moved your legs to go from sitting on her to straddling her and leaned down to kiss her neck, gently at first, but quickly getting lost in the sensation of her scent, her soft skin, feeling her struggle to stay quiet and still under you until her patience wore thin and she needed more, so she tugged at the bottom of your shirt to signal to you to let her pull it off. the moment you leaned back again, she did just that, pulling it off and throwing it to the side before she grabbed you and kissed your chest, a low humming sound of pleasure, your hands around her neck as she put her lips to the soft skin right above your bra, biting it lightly because she couldn´t keep her desperation for you inside. you did her a favor and removed your underwear, so she could do what she really wanted, to get her mouth on your tits, messy and needy as she moved you from her legs to your back onto the couch, leaning down and covering your whole chest and stomach in wet kisses, overcome with all the desire she´d kept at bay during the time she had to manage being separated from you, your breathing interrupted by satisfied sighs. you spent about half an hour just making out on her couch like that, grabbing and biting and caressing each other in a feverish state of “I missed you” passion, and yet, holding off with actually fucking because you both knew you´d want to really take your time and do it properly later that evening, perhaps also because you liked the idea of getting hot for each other during dinner, having that leftover bit of anticipation, drawing it out a few more hours to savor the intense longing you´d both gotten so used to. 

eventually, you suggested that you should probably go take a shower and get changed. you were eager to look as good as possible in her presence, so she showed you where she kept her towels and left you to it, getting herself a drink from the fridge and opening the balcony door to sit there with a breeze against her face as she smiled to herself, unable to hide how giddy she was over the fact that she finally had the girl she wanted back in her life,  many days and nights to look forward to.

once you were out of the shower you wrapped yourself in a big towel and went back to her bedroom to get dressed, still high on the surreal feeling of being in her space, daydreaming about becoming part of it, not just for a week. as you looked at all the tops you´d brought with you, none of them stood out to, so you got an idea and stepped closer to the door to call out to Tess, “what is it?” she answered from the living room, “come, help me with something”, so she did what she was told. Tess didn´t walk into the room but stopped in the door frame for a second to take in the sight of you in your underwear and jeans “damn, I could get used to this” she said, looking you up and down, her arms crossed, you smiled at her, a sudden tingling sensation on your exposed skin where her gaze was resting.

“can I wear one of your shirts? please?” you asked, batting your eyelashes at her but you didn´t even have to convince her, she loved the idea of seeing you in her clothes, “sure, yeah, come here” she said, waving you over as she walked to her closet and opened the doors for you, “nothing´s off limits, pick whatever you want” so you started scanning the various fabrics as she watched you, absentmindedly tracing your upper body with her fingers, all the parts of you that were yet to be covered, the softness of your freshly showered skin making her space out until you said “okay, let´s try this one”. 

you stepped in front of the full length mirror next to her closet and pulled the black long sleeve shirt that you´d picked out over your head, it was light enough for summer nights and fit you well, you fussed with your hair as she stepped behind you, she could tell that you were trying to find a fault with your appearance, so her arms found their way around your waist, pulling you back into herself as she looked ahead at the reflection of you both, her head resting on your shoulder, “you´re so pretty” she cooed before leaning in and lightly kissing your neck, turned on from the sight of you in something that was hers. you smiled and closed your eyes as she started feeling you up, “we won´t make it to dinner if you keep doing that” you sighed, so she laughed and restrained herself, letting you go and walking over to her bedside table to touch up her perfume, hearing you utter “god that smells so good..” the second it hit your nose, because even just a hint of her signature scent was enough to make you feel dizzy. Tess looked pleased, well aware of that effect, recalling the times you´d basically licked her neck with pure greed, not acknowledging your comment but announcing her plans instead “okay so, there´s this great Thai place about fifteen minutes from here, it´s my favorite spot, so much so that I actually never take people there because I like that it´s my secret thing, but I´d like show it to you”, you smiled, “so, I´m an exception?”, she nodded “absolutely yes”, somehow you could tell that she wasn´t just saying it to charm you, that you did occupy a special place in her life. “sounds good to me, I´m starving so I´ll be very easy to impress”, “okay great, come on then”. you both exited the bedroom and collected your things before stepping out, both giddy with the excitement of having a proper date night for the first time since getting together, no time limit, no rush, total freedom. 

the atmosphere that night was idyllic, it was that distinct late summer feel, a warmth that was pleasant but not too heavy, the sun setting earlier than those bright weeks in June, casting the sky in a muted blue, little accents of orange from the glow of the streetlights, the sound of people chatting and getting drinks after a long day, a collective sense of slow ease in the city as you linked arms and started walking. usually, Tess kept her head down when she made her way through those streets, she was the type to just zone out and wear headphones all the way to her destinations, never looking at her hometown with much generosity, lost in a dull routine, but your presence was changing things for her; she found herself falling back in love with where she lived because she saw how much you were enjoying yourself, it was rubbing off on her, the way you looked around and pointed out all the details she usually passed by without thinking twice. for years Tess had refused to be present in her life, after a few very painful years she´d decided to just give up on excitement, on chasing thrills and had numbed herself as best as she could, pushing herself into a state of hardness that left her cut off from most strong feelings. she told herself it was better that way, to remain detached and untouchable, but you had come along and were helping her come out of that state. you´d given her a reason to feel again, to come back into her body, to be in touch with her senses and the world again, for the first time in ages she felt completely present, glad to be exactly where she was in life. as she thought all of this you could feel her pulling you closer, shoulder to shoulder, you´d missed it terribly all summer, those casual intimacies with her. 

during your walk to the restaurant she gave you the inside scoop on a lot of the places you passed: her favorite spot for coffee, a cinema that she frequented, a bar that she might take you to later that week, the entire time you were listening intently, buzzing with the joy of being let into her life like that. 

the place was located in a small alley that branched out from the bigger street you´d been walking down, so it was quiet and secluded, the kind of place that didn´t need a bunch of fancy decorations to lure people in, a lowkey but cozy vibe, a few lanterns hanging outside, little candles burning on the tables, vases with little fresh flowers around the room. you decided to sit inside because the doors were open anyway and a few couples were already sitting out on the terrace, so a table indoors would offer a little more privacy. the room was dimly lit and a delicious smell was stirring your hunger, a few workers busy behind the bar with making drinks, soft music playing over the speakers as a kind waitress showed you to a table placed two menus in front of you.

“so, go ahead and tell me what´s good here” you said, leaning your head on your hands while looking at her expectantly. “well I have my usual order but how about we share a few things so you can try more of them? we can take whatever we can´t finish home”, that sounded good to you, so you ended up deciding on both a noodle and rice dish, some homemade spring rolls, dumplings with chili sauce, and two peach iced teas, which she advertised as the best you´d ever have. 

as you waited for the food she pulled your hands over the table, holding them as you both stared at each other lovingly. “I honestly can´t believe I´m actually here now” you said, “yeah me neither” she agreed while you both interlaced your fingers, almost like you had to touch the other person to be sure you weren´t dreaming. “can I be real for a second?” you asked, “please, yes”. you laughed to yourself before going on “I honestly went kind of insane this summer because of you”, Tess smiled then, not having expected that “should I apologize?”, of course she didn´t feel sorry at all, you shook your head, “I just need you to know how serious I am about this. like I have truly never felt this way, it was all day, all night, I couldn´t think of anything else to be honest”. usually Tess was not one to admit her intense feelings to others, especially not romantically, but in that moment she didn´t feel scared to do it, she wanted you to know that it was not one-sided, that obsessiveness you were describing,“yeah I was going through something similar, people caught on very quickly about what was going on with me, which says a lot because I´d like to think of myself as hard to read. but yeah, apparently it was written all over my face when I thought about you” you liked the sound of that,“really?”, “yeah, someone straight up asked me who “she” is because it was so obvious”, you were thrilled by the idea of someone as calm and collected as her being so shaken up by you, “and what did you say?” you inquired, leaning forward.

“oh the truth of course, that I´m having an affair with my friend´s college age daughter”, her dry delivery of that made you laugh then, “affair? that sounds scandalous”, she kept looking at you, “well I hate to break it to you but this kind of is sweetheart”. she was right of course, but it did slip your mind at times how odd your involvement might seem to others, since it felt so right and natural to you. “so, is that a turn on for you? that this is kinda fucked up?” you teased, looking at her with a challenging grin as she leaned back and eyed you in a way that brought color to your cheeks, a pregnant pause on her part before answering “no comment.”, a smugness to her expression that gave away what the actual answer was. 

once the dishes were in front of you, she had a lot of fun getting you to try everything first, she wanted to watch your reaction before joining you in eating, and she was not disappointed, you clearly loved all of it, after a full day of travel a meal like that was exhilarating, the sauces were seasoned just right, thick and savory, the dumplings tasted divine, soft and pillowy, practically melting on your tongue, the iced tea was perfect, a great contrast to the heat of the spicy meal. Tess had a thing for watching you eat, her way of loving you was largely based on wanting you to feel good, in every sense of the word, so seeing you take pleasure in something, whether that be her touch, her words, her attention, or the things she gave you to eat and drink, it all made her feel like she was doing a good job; to her being your lover meant more than just having sex with you or spending time with you, she thought of it as her responsibility to make sure that her presence was actively bettering your life, your well being, so a dinner like that where you said things like “this might be the best meal I´ve had in years” made her heart swell. at her core, Tess wanted to feel like she had a purpose, and despite how closed off she might have seemed to those around her all her life, she´d always been the type to go looking for that kind of fulfillment in devotion to another person, the kind that is so deep and visceral and sacred that it almost seems sacrilegious to speak of it to other people. it seemed unthinkable for her to try and explain to someone else what you meant to her. 

after you both put your utensils down and sipped the rest of your drinks, she had something on her mind, “can I ask you something?”, a gentle tone,“sure yes”. she thought about how to word it for a second, you leaned your head on your hand as you waited for her to speak. “you weren´t with many people before me, right?” you shook your head “no”. you saw no point in lying to her, you wanted her to know you and she was glad that you trusted her. “well, I was just wondering, is it strange for you sometimes, that you´re having these experiences with someone much older? you can be honest with me, really, I can handle it” the seriousness with which she said that touched you, it was clear that she wanted to make sure that you were comfortable, that you knew you could talk to her openly.

 “it´s sweet of you to ask but no, not at all. I was actually thinking about this recently, the fact that I feel more like myself around you than with the people I tried to date in college. it just never clicked, I always felt like I was putting on an act, you know? but with you it was so easy from the beginning. I never felt awkward or weird around you, it was freeing in that way. i mean, it still is, so no, it doesn´t feel strange” she could tell that you meant it and it put her at ease, you played with the straw of your drink as you added “I do sometimes have thoughts about my age too, because I never want you to get bored or anything, since I´m less experienced in many ways”, she sensed that there was a hint of insecurity in there and she was puzzled by it “okay that is nonsense, really. trust me, I have been with “experienced” women and that doesn´t mean shit, some of them had no idea how to treat a partner or how to be a decent person in general. they could learn a thing or two from you, believe me, you´re a dream to be with”, you smiled at her, charmed by that answer, reaching out to caress her forearm, “also, just to add to your question, it should be pretty obvious to you that I don´t care about your age because you´re fucking hot”, she laughed then, shaking her head, flattered by your ever so shameless way of lusting after her “okay, sure, let´s not act like saints here, I also wouldn´t have invited you to my place if I didn´t wanna fuck you”, she said it that way on purpose to mess with you a little, grinning at you as your face briefly got colored in shock. “okay I see, that´s how it is” you responded, but of course you didn´t mind one bit, it felt good to get back into that familiar thing of trying to catch each other off guard with out of pocket comments.

eventually she got the bill, she wouldn´t have let you pay even a fraction of it in a million years, and you both made your way back outside. by that time it was dark and the air had gotten chilly, so she made sure to wrap her arm tightly around you as you walked back to her apartment, but before you could reach her place her attention got caught by something. “oh, I forgot about this place”, you followed her gaze and saw that she was looking at a shop across the street, “they have this really fancy ice cream, it´s a little overprized but worth it. you want some?” she asked, “yeah sure!”. it was hard to pick because the flavors all sounded uniquely delicious, but you eventually settled on salted caramel while she got a dark chocolate raspberry mix, conveniently there was an empty bench right next to the store, so you sat down and got comfortable while tasting the desert and nodding at each other in approval as the intense flavor spread on your tongues. 

“yeah this is it” you said, immediately going in for more. she had her arm behind your back on the bench and watched what was going on around you for a while, before her attention was drawn to your mouth. you had no idea what she was thinking as you licked the ice cream but the sight of your tongue swirling around like that, the undeniable erotic quality of those movements, it made her rethink her attitude towards getting head from you. previously she´d almost always been the giver, you´d gotten her off here and there and you´d made it clear to her that you´d enjoy doing more for her, but she had yet to take you up on the offer, perhaps because she was scared of being vulnerable in that way, but as she kept watching you devour the slowly melting ice cream, your lips glistening from it, she couldn´t help but feel a heat between her legs as she imagined how it would feel to have your tongue on her, to have you savoring her taste. Tess was not one to lose her composure easily but she was getting impatient, she felt a violent need building up inside of her that was bordering on the unbearable, so she cleared her throat before announcing “I think we should go home.”, a weight to the words that made you turn to face her, the moment you locked eyes with her you could tell what she was actually saying, which was I need to get my hands on you right now. so you kept your answer brief “okay” and let her pull you up. 

both of you were quiet and walked significantly faster than earlier, there had been a build-up of desire for weeks, countless dreams of each other, countless hours of aching for each other´s touch, and in that moment it came crashing over both of you in full force. the hours before it had been on a low simmer but in that moment it boiled over and you were struck by a need for each other that was so deep and intense that you almost had trouble breathing as you hurried up the stairs to her apartment. 

the moment the door was shut behind you, she dragged you to her bedroom and you couldn´t help but smile from being wanted that desperately. she barely managed to switch on her bedside lamp before she turned back to you and kissed you hard, her hands on the sides of your face, a whimpering sound from you as you felt your whole body burning up for her; you both started fumbling with each other´s clothes immediately, almost ripping them off until you were left in your underwear, allowing yourselves a moment of admiring the other person´s physique in the dim light, your eyes drawn to her broad shoulders, her strong upper arms, the way her hair was falling down over them in waves, her eyes drawn to your stomach, your hips, that space right above your thighs she was dying to grab. you quickly pulled each other close to kiss again, feverishly and sloppier than before while she pushed you towards the bed, you were grabbing each other all over, wherever your hands landed, a force to the way your fingers dug into each other´s flesh that got you more and more worked up, it was pure bliss to finally have it back, that dizzying passion.

Tess backed you up onto the mattress, you were flat on your back then as she climbed over you and pinned your arms down at your sides, her fresh musky fragrance clouding your mind as you looked up at her and sighed “don´t hold back, please”, she always had to be careful with leaving marks while you were in your hometown, but now you were free, so she lost no time and abandoned restraint, kissing you all over your neck, sucking and biting the soft skin that she´d missed so terribly, your skin various shades of red in certain places, soaking up the sounds you were making, a mix between sighs and moans, not too loud yet but definitely getting there as she moved down to your chest. during the times you´d fucked before you´d always done it in a rush, worried your time was running out, but in that moment it was completely different, after she left your neck raw from having her way with you, you both hastily got rid of your underwear, you climbed on top of her, flush against each other, chest to chest as you made out, her hands roaming all over your body, switching between squeezing and caressing, yours next to her face as you got lost in the heat of the full body contact, the overwhelming sensuality, doing things that you hadn´t thought of doing before, kissing her arm all the way down, taking the time to taste every part of her that you´d spent so much time staring at, which was driving her insane, feeling your soft lips tender on her hand, briefly taking her fingers in your mouth, a low sound of pleasure from her as you messily licked over her stomach, her tits, leaving a trail of spit until you reached her throat and eventually put your lips back to hers, obsecene with it, open mouthed and moaning as your tongues met, your hands in her hair, both moving your hips as you kissed, increasingly desperate to do more, to release the tension that had built up at your core; without even consciously trying to, you ended up in a position that allowed you to rub up against each other, you still on top of her, grinding against her as your wetness mixed with hers and got you both to a point of pathetic whining very quickly, your palms flat on her chest for support as she stared at you in awe, her hands firm at your sides, both of you suddenly overcome with the need to sigh sweet things to each other, a constant echo of, “you´re so pretty” , “I missed you so much”, “you feel so good”, wrapping each other in the comfort of those words as you felt yourselves throbbing from the constant friction, the slick feeling of the other person´s heat against your own, the divine sensation whenever you found just the right angle and rocked back and forth like that, moaning in unison. eventually you locked eyes as you felt that you might cum at the same time, so you leaned down and breathed into each other´s open mouths as you finished, too far gone too kiss properly, remaining like that and clinging to each other out of breath. 

Tess was gripped by the need to have you on her fingers, to feel how soaked you were from the inside, so she pushed you onto the empty space next to her, urging you to lay back and get comfortable as she moved her hand down between your legs and felt how soaked you´d gotten, a breathy, “fuck..” as she used the mess to slick up her fingers, a needy, almost pained sound from you then, “you feel so good” she praised as she slowly pushed two of her fingers into you, addicted to the feeling of your velvety hot flesh as she went knuckle deep, an almost animal-like possessiveness in to her physicality then that rendered you defenseless, entirely at her mercy, trembling with the thrill of being taken by her as she leaned down to kiss your chest, fucking you slowly to really feel it, the way you were throbbing, rocking against her hand. Tess sighed against your skin as she felt you turning into an utter mess for her, “fuck, right there”, you cried as she found the spot she needed to target, your hands gripping the sheets, your head pressed into the pillow as she sucked on your neck and made you almost black out with the double arousal from being both fingered and kissed, both your lower and upper body on fire from the feeling of her all over you, the ache at your core deepening each passing second from her relentless pressure on your sweet spot, your legs wide open for her even though you felt the need to press them together, “always such a good girl for me, hm?” she praised as she saw that you were trying to be easy for her, “so fucking pretty like this”, she knew what her words were capable of doing to you, especially when she kept her voice low and whispery, so she used it to drive you over the edge, her mouth close to your ear, her breath warm against your face as she had you trapped beneath her, working at your throbbing core, feeling you clench around her fingers as she kept whispering to you, about how hot you sounded, how many times she´d fantasized about doing exactly that, how nothing else made her finish lately when touching herself, your nails digging into her back as you felt yourself coming undone, “it´s okay, I got you” she assured as you tried to let go and let yourself cum around her fingers, eventually unable to hold off any longer as the climax shook you to your core, more visceral than the one before, biting down on her shoulder to stifle the sounds, which made her groan in pleasure, the feeling of your teeth digging into her flesh like that, an unexpected thrill to the pain, she´d have let you draw blood if you´d wanted to. for a moment she refused to let go, even though you were clearly spent, and kept her hand on the mess she´d just made, moving her hand up to your clit to tease you during the aftershocks of your orgasm, which you didn´t mind, it felt good, to be overstimulated, to be pushed into a state of total surrender to her touch, her impact, softer and quieter moans from you then as she watched you, mesmerized by the beauty of your face when you were lost in pleasure, “my angel” slipping out of her mouth as you eventually pulled her hand up to lick it clean for her.

once you found your words again you leaned closer to her ear and whispered “tell me what to do, I´ll do whatever you want”, an eagerness to your tone that hit her right where she was weakest. nothing satisfied Tess more than having you surrender to her, having you waiting for her instructions, desperate to please by letting her do whatever she wanted, but in that moment a different urge came over her, she ran her hands up and down your spine as she responded, “you still wanna taste me?”, which made you move your face change in an instant, conveying your clear “yes” with an intense look, it was like she´d awakened a hunger in you that you´d kept at bay, but now that she was giving you the green light, you felt yourself salivating at the thought, “please, yes”. she nodded, giving you a light slap on your thigh, motioning for you to get down to her legs, “go on then”. 

even though you were switching roles of giver and receiver, she was still going to be the dominant one, and you wouldn´t have wanted it any other way. you your placed your hands on her warm thighs as you got down between them, kissing the soft inside at first, the part of her body you´d admired so many times, finally yours, as she leaned back and tried to let go of the slight tension she felt. it was made easy by your tender way of going about it, it turned her on immensely, the contrast of your style versus hers, she knew you needed her to be rough and greedy with it, while you knew that she needed you to be devoted and eager, it got her good, the feeling of looking down at a pretty girl between her legs, visibly aching for her taste. you briefly got lost in the haze of covering her thighs in little kisses and bites, almost worshiping her in a way, but you could feel her growing impatient, her hands moving to your hair as she uttered, “enough teasing, baby”, urging you to give her what she wanted. you kept your hands hooked around her legs as you put your tongue to her cunt, hit by how wet she´d gotten from your fucking before, licking it up in broad strokes before you pushed your face closer, your tongue between her folds then, her grip on you tightening, “that´s it” she praised, “keep going”, so you took the cue and turned it sloppier and more intense, sliding your tongue up and down in a steady rhythm, moving your face with the motions to add more force, “fuck..” you could hear her moan as her head fell back and her back arched up a little, it was completely overwhelming for her in the best sense, she was too prideful to be very loud but she could have moaned pathetically right then if she´d let herself, it had been a while since anyone had eaten her out and you were doing it so passionately, so clearly not just for her pleasure but your own too, that she wondered why the fuck she had denied herself that kind of heaven, her eyes shut, her body on fire, her mind full of only one thought “I love her, I love this girl, I lover her so much”,  a sudden rush of adoration for you that could have made her cry from the overstimulated feelign of being fucked while she felt it; meanwhile you were also weak with the weight of your arousal, you could feel yourself growing wetter and needier as your whole lower face got coated in her cum, it was exactly what you´d dreamed of so many times, to finally return the favor, to show her how good it felt to be taken care of in that way, drunk on the taste of her, knowing that you´d stay down there for hours if she told you to, comforted by the feeling of being trapped between her thighs. 

eventually she could feel a familiar knot tightening at her core and pushed your head further against herself, her fingers rough in your hair, which got a sound out of you that was whiny and pathetic, dumb with lust as you felt her forcing you closer with that move, keeping her hands there and not letting you move an inch as she struggled to remain quiet, “just like that, don´t stop”, the praise was all you needed to get perverse with it, your spit mixed with her juices leaving her skin and yours a total mess as you devoured her, switching from licking to sucking on her clit to give her a final push, an immediate low groan leaving her lips, breathless by that point, her hips moving upward as she felt the beginning of an orgasm spreading through her whole body, building up to a hard release as you kept your lips on her, nails digging into her flesh as you let her rock against your face as hard as she wanted, soaking up every little noise she made as she came, every move of her muscles, high on the knowledge that it was your doing, her unraveling. once she was left slack and intensely flushed, you slowly moved your face away and gave her thigh a last indulgent bite before moving up to look at her, your hand on her chest as you laid down next to her, the room silent except for your shared attempt to breathe steadily again. a few moments later a smile spread across her tired face, turning her face to see your prideful expression. 

“you´re a freak, hm?” she teased, brushing a strand of hair out of your sweat-stricken face. “oh, you´re just now noticing?” you said, grinning at her, “maybe. I should´ve let you do that sooner, god..”, she shook her head, still coming down from the high you just gave her, gazing up at the ceiling for a moment as you traced patterns on her skin with your index finger, staring at her in awe, the blush on her cheeks, her messed up hair. “hm, agree. but you know, we can make up for lost time this week”, she nodded, “oh, we will, yes.”, moving her body over to trap you, her arms by your sides then, looking down at you before kissing you, not a care in the world about the fact that she could taste herself on your lips, covering your face in kisses, eliciting quiet sighs and giggles from you. after she pulled back she put her hand flat on your slightly bruised chest,“we should take a shower, I think”.“we?” you asked, in slight disbelief over the fact that she was willing to be that vulnerable; fucking was one thing, getting cleaned up together was another, and it was true, usually Tess did not do that with the women she was seeing, but she could not stand the idea of leaving you in her room as she showered, or waiting for you as you did, it was different with you. “yes, we, I´m not done with this yet”, she said while gesturing at your exposed form, so you smiled “okay, come on then”, still somewhat weak as you peeled yourself off of the bed and waited for her to lead the way.

Tess´s bathroom was tiled in a dark green color, so at night it had a cozy and slightly cave-like feeling , as opposed to the white tiled ones you were used to, you noticed this as she turned on the shower and made sure the temperature was fine, before you both got in and stood facing each other, your hands loosely resting on each other´s waists, barely a few inches apart. 

a few seconds after the hot water started running down your skin, it hit you both at the same time, that getting showering together was somehow more exposing than having sex because your bodies weren´t in motion or in a particularly sexy pose, you were both just standing there, vulnerable, your bodies visible for what they were in their natural state. Tess could tell that you shared some of her sudden shyness and got an idea, before you could reach for any body wash, she did it herself and told you “turn around, let me do that for you, baby”, which she didn´t have to say twice. she put some product in her hands and rubbed them together to create some foam before gently moving her palms over your back, lightly kissing your shoulder for a second, and you could feel yourself relaxing into her touch immediately. the vaguely citrusy and herbal scent started mixing with the steam of the water and gave the shower a spa like feeling, she moved her hands all over you in deliberate gentle motions, enjoying the sensation of your soft skin coated in the creamy soap, almost hypnotized by it, she could have kept doing that for a while, so she made a mental note of offering you a massage sometime. “that feels nice” you sighed as you leaned back against her a little, and she couldn´t help but move her hands to your chest then to pull you even closer, her hands briefly over your tits, the hint of a moan leaving you then, which didn´t escape her, so she kept her fingers there for a moment, a smile on your face as your head rested against her shoulder, “I think I´ll pass out if you actually try to do anything right now”, your body was already exhausted from before and you felt the heat sinking into your limbs, leaving you relaxed but also hot enough to a point where you suspected that extreme arousal might actually make you lose consciousness. Tess smiled too then, “well we don´t want that, do we”, but as she said that you abruptly turned around and put your hands on her neck, staring at her as you pressed yourself against her to transfer some of the soap onto her, the feeling of it somehow more intense than you both expected, being chest to chest while water and foam were slicking you up, so you leaned in to kiss her, only briefly, but she pulled you back in the moment she could feel space between your lips again, she had no desire to stop as she felt you submitting to her force but it didn´t take long for her to lose her breath, so you both ended up standing there panting, desperate for air because the room was all fogged up. 

both of you laughed then, “we´re fucking losing it” you said, hugging her as you closed your eyes and felt her wet chest against yours, “yeah I´m done for, we need to get out before we overheat and die”, so you both rinsed off together and stepped out, wrapping yourselves in big towels.

as you dried off and stood on the shower mat, your gaze fell to the sink, “two toothbrushes?” you exclaimed, exaggerating a scandalized tone, “is this the point where you confess to me that you´ve had a girlfriend all along?”. Tess shook her head, “yeah you figured it all out, I´m just using you to cheat, sorry” her tone dripping in irony, you couldn´t help but smile then as she pointed at what you were referring to, “that´s a fresh one for you, genius, because I know how easy it is to forget shit like that”. of course she was right, you could recall countless times of cursing yourself for not having packed something small but important like deodorant or toothpaste and you were charmed by her considerate ways, the idea of her wondering what you might need before you´d come to her place.“that´s really cute, thank you” but ,as always, she didn´t wanna hear it, so you quietly joined her by the sink and kept looking at her with soft eyes as you both brushed your teeth. Tess was facing the mirror but she could feel your gaze on her side profile and let herself enjoy it, not turning to you, just soaking up that quiet moment of intimacy, the sensation of having your undivided loving attention.

once you were both dressed in comfortable nightwear and back in bed you couldn´t help but smile to yourself as got comfortable under the covers, you were content to your core, thrilled by the fact that you were finally gonna sleep next to her again. you felt a delicious sense of satisfaction over the fact that nobody had any idea what you were doing, that it was your secret, in a sense it made you feel powerful, to have your joy all to yourself like that, without any witnesses but her. Tess looked down at you, pride bubbling up in her over the fact that you clearly loved your situation, “happy?”, she asked, knowing the answer, you nodded, moving yourself closer to her, “yeah this is perfect. god this mattress is like a cloud, my bed is not nearly this nice”, she smiled, her hand on top of the blanket that you´d pulled up to your shoulders, “well, I have a hot tip for you then, when you eventually get your own place, splurge on your bed instead of fancy decoration or furniture. trust me, your back will start hurting soon enough”. you laughed, “okay, noted. sweet of you to assume I´ll make enough money to have my own apartment, with the housing market as it is.. let's see about that one”, she smiled, “you have a point, yes. but I have faith, if everything fails, something tells me you won´t have trouble finding some older richer woman to take you in”, you joined in on the joke, “right, I´m getting great practice here. except for the rich part of course”.

she leaned down to kiss you, more tenderly than before, light kisses that didn´t burn but calm you, she liked having you under her, so she stayed like that for a moment until she got more comfortable next to you, sinking further down into her pillow. you remembered something then.

“I saw a book on your nightstand earlier”, “yes..” she said, a hint of apprehension in there, “what is it?” you asked, looking at her expectantly. “I actually haven't picked it up in ages”, her tone less unwavering than usual, “yes, I´m listening”, you could tell she was dodging the question. “okay but don´t you dare laugh”. “laugh?? what.. is it some trashy romance novel? weird erotica?”, she shoved your arm then, “no! is that what you think of me? really?”, you shrugged, “hey I have no idea what you´re into”. you were expecting something embarrassing but it turned out to be the exact opposite. she reached over to grab the book, holding it out to you so you could read the title yourself, you recognized the name on the cover. “Mary Oliver? you think I´d make fun of you for reading one of the best poets of all time? Tess come on, do you think I´m an asshole?”, she was relieved, for some reason she´d felt shy about admitting a more private interest of hers to you, “no of course not, I don´t know. I guess it just doesn´t really fit my image, does it?”, “your image? you really don´t want people to know you feel things deeply, hm? a bit too late with me, hate to break it to you, love”, she smiled then, at the casual use of the word “love”, and because it was true, there was no need to pretend around you, you´d already seen her at her most romantic and vulnerable, so she opened up a little. “it´s actually the one book I´ve had the longest. one day when I was in my late 20s I was going through it, like truly the worst fucking day ever, and for some reason ended up in a bookstore. I was just browsing, kind of losing my mind, and then came across this collection. I guess I liked that the poems were hopeful without being corny or overwrought. I kept going back to it whenever I was kind of.. I don´t know, lost?”. you gave that confession a few moments of respectful silence before saying, “that´s really sweet”. it was touching to you, that she was so shy about the fragile parts of herself, the ones that she had probably kept to herself for most of her life, concealed by her very convincingly tough aura.

“actually, could you maybe read me some of those”, you asked her, which made her turn to face you again, “what, like a bedtime story?” slightly confused, “no, just.. I like your voice. I like hearing you speak”. “yeah I am well aware, ever since a certain phone call a few weeks ago” she said with a smug expression, “oh shut up, this isn´t about that, I am trying to be sincere. I am asking you to read to me because I-” you almost slipped up and said “because I love you”, you saved yourself before the words could come out, but your abrupt pause was a giveaway, she knew what you´d thought, and it hit her, but she let it go, though she wouldn´t forget it, “because it would soothe me” you said instead. “okay, okay let me see if I can find some favorites. come over here” she said, pulling you closer, your head against her side then as she had put her arm around your back. 

“I don´t have any practice of course, so bear with me” she prefaced, but the moment she read the first few words out loud, you were sucked into it immediately, the slow rhythm of it, the humm in her chest that you could feel because you were pressed against her, the deliberate pauses she made, it was deeply relaxing to listen to, so you closed your eyes. after a few verses she stopped, unsure if you´d want her to continue, but you urged her “hm you´re good at this, go on”, so she did, remembering the parts of certain poems she´d held close to her heart when she was younger, a sweet contrast, to be sharing something with a lover that she´d often turned to when she had been at her loneliest. a few minutes in, Tess could feel your drifting off, your breathing became slower and your head became heavier, so eventually she quietly put the book down and stayed like that, her fingers lightly running up down your spine as you fell asleep in her embrace. for a while she did not allow herself to move because she loved the feeling of having you nestled against her like that, but eventually her eyes got heavy and she switched off her bedside lamp, moving herself down to lay her head near yours, your breath warm against her face as she joined you in a dreamless sleep. 

all the intense impressions from the day before had made it so that you both slept through the night without any interruptions, so by the time you first woke up the next day it was already around 9 am. for a while you laid there half-conscious, sprawled out comfortably over her large bed, your arms stretched out on either side, which eventually signaled to you that you were alone. reliably, Tess had gotten up before you, you were well aware by then that she was not the type to sleep in late, even on her off days, so you forced yourself to wake up for good and join her. 

as you walked into the living room, slightly self-conscious about your disheveled appearance, she had her back turned because she was busy with the coffee machine, so a few seconds into watching her you cleared your throat, a bright smile on your face as she turned around, “oh hey! perfect timing, I just got done with this” she said, pointing at the table. the first thing that caught your eye was a vase filled with beautiful flowers, the kind that almost looked like they grew in the wild, dainty but colorful, shades of lilac and pink, they hadn´t been there the day before. “wow, those are stunning. wait, you were outside already?”, you asked, she nodded as she came over to you and gave you a light kiss on the cheek before urging you to sit down with her, “yeah, I wanted to make this a little nicer than just.. you know boring old toast. we have this bakery around here, I don´t often get stuff for myself but I thought you´d like it. oh and these yeah, I recall you liking flowers so, they stood out to me”. she said it all so nonchalantly but it was really special to you, that she´d gone out of her way to do all that because you´d have been fine with much less, you still felt a bit of sleep in your eyes as you looked at what was in front of you, “drink something first” she ordered, pointing at the three glasses of water, juice, and coffee in front of you, so you did, as she went on to explain what she´d bought. “okay, so, this one is a croissant with pistachio filling, it´s kind of what they´re known for, but I really like the white and dark chocolate swirl one so if you want we can share”, you agreed, watching her rip them both in two, placing the halves on your plate and watching you closely as you tried them, “oh wow, that´s fucking good” you said as the intense sweet flavor hit your tongue, she leaned back, satisfied, successful in her attempt to start your day off in an ideal way. 

“you know, it´s kind of unfair that you always get dressed before me” you bemoaned, gesturing at her outfit as you both ate, “you always look better than me in the morning”, she shook her head, her mouth still half full as she mumbled “bullshit. that´s your warped perception, trust me, most people would prefer waking up to that” a wave of her hand in your direction as she said this. “well, not everyone has good taste, so” you joked, grinning at her, “right, and you do?”, she couldn´t deny that it felt good to be accused of upstaging you in the looks department even thought she vehemently disagreed. “clearly, look at this, I´m spoiled as hell”, she couldn´t really argue with that, still, she wondered if you actually thought you looked worse than her in that moment, because she had a hard time keeping herself from letting you finish your meal uninterrupted. she´d have liked to go over to you to slip her hand under your shirt, to feel your skin that was still warm from sleep. 

for a while you both leisurely emptied your plates and cups and talked about whatever came to mind, enjoying the feeling of a slow summer morning, of sharing a domestic kind of intimacy. “so, what are we doing today?” you asked her eventually, eager to do whatever she wanted, your eyes glimmering with excitement at the thought of still having the whole day ahead of you. “well, I have an idea, but I´m gonna need you to hear me out...” she seemed slightly unsure, so you wondered what was gonna come “sure, tell me”. “okay, so, about 45 minutes outside of the city there´s this really beautiful hike but not the boring kind, trust me, it´s not just an endless fucking trail, it´s this forest landscape with a bunch of little rivers and a lake, I went there a lot when I was younger, and since it´s a weekday I doubt we´d run into many people. also-” you interrupted her then, “you don´t have to convince me Tess, I´m down, let´s do it. do you think I´m that unathletic, that I´m scared of a hike?” you said, smiling and giving her a questioning look, she smiled too then, “well I guess I´ll see what we´re working with once we´re there, right?”. “you´re scared you´ll have to carry me once I get tired, huh?” you teased, “oh, you´d like that wouldn´t you” she said, “probably yeah. but don´t worry, I´ll manage. in fact, maybe I´ll have to support you in the end, you know, since you´re..”, “old?” she finished the sentence for you, acting offended, “I´m not 70 sweetie, so let´s see who has to take a break first” she challenged you, leaning forward as she said it, you returned the energy, “won´t be me”, even though you knew she could probably triumph over you in terms of endurance, something told you she wasn´t the type to ever admit that she felt weak, both emotionally and physically. 

after breakfast you spent some time on the couch, you half on her lap, her hands on you, a soft lazy exchange of touches and kisses until it was around 11:00 and you mustered up the energy to get ready as well. 

by noon you were in her car, sharing a bottle of ice cold water because it was already warming up by that hour, the windows down and the radio playing as you found all kinds of things to talk about: classes you were gonna take in the new year, jokes from her side about you probably being a teacher´s pet considering you talent for charming people her age, you grilling her about details from work, gossip she could share, trying but failing to get her to spill some stuff about exes of hers, whether you fit her usual type, if she even had one, but Tess was steadfast in her refusal to share any of that, leaving you to tease her with speculations like “I bet there was some hot intern at work you had a thing with. maybe you fucked in the office or something, is that it?” until you reached your destination and quit the banter. 

she hadn´t over-promised, the area was absolutely stunning; trees as tall as buildings as far as the eye could reach. you were at the beginning of a path that had a slow incline and would lead you to the top of a hill, the thick row of trees would offer enough shade for it to be an enjoyable hike and the little patches of flowers and plants you had never seen before offered enough to keep your eyes busy. 

the first half hour passed very quickly, both you and Tess kept pointing out things to each other, stopping every now and then to inspect certain kinds of berries of particularly colorful kinds of flowers, her teasing you by ripping out some leaves and running them over your skin to catch you off guard with the sensation, getting a high pitched squeal out of you that made her bend over in laughter and earned her a kick to the shin from you. you liked watching her as you made your way deeper into the forest, it was hot to you, seeing her physically exhaust herself, her leg muscles straining whenever there was a steepness to your path, her breath heavier, her face dewy from the heat, she could feel your eyes on her as you went a little quiet and she liked it, knowing that you were checking her out, so eventually she stopped, leading you to a tree and backing you up against it as she grinned at you, waiting for you to follow your instinct, which you immediately did, pulling her in for a kiss as she slid her hands under your shirt and enjoyed the thrill of feeling you up in public, kissing your neck as you felt the bark of the tree against your head, your hair getting caught as you shut your eyes and sighed from the sensation of her sucking on the skin right above your collarbone until she pulled away and left you flushed and disheveled, acting all innocent as she said “shall we continue?” pointing at the path and walking away from you, a shake of your head as you tried to slow your breathing and to forget about the fact that for a second there you´d hoped that she might actually fuck you in public. one day, you thought, one day she´ll cave and do it.

about an hour in, you both felt a rush of gratitude as you reached an area that made you gasp in awe, “oh wow”, you said, as you looked at a river that was wide enough to swim in, a truly picturesque scene, and because you were both sweating and ready for a break by that point, you looked at each and realized that you were thinking the same thing. “should we?...” you asked, pointing at the river, Tess thought about it, “god that would feel so good right now, wouldn´t it? you know what, let´s do it, we can go in our underwear, it´ll dry fast if we sit there for a few minutes after”. “oh I was just talking about taking our shoes off and getting our legs in there” you said, surprised by her bold idea. “oh no, all or nothing baby. come on, it´ll be fun” she nudged you playfully, so you gave in because it did sound delicious in that moment, to cool your hot body, the sound of the rushing water practically luring you in. “alright, fuck it, let´s do it” you put your bag down and unzipped your shorts as she did the same. 

as you stood there after getting rid of your shirt, Tess leered at you, pointing at your bra “I think you should take that off too” a smug grin on her face, you put your hand on your hip and raised your eyebrows, “right, so some stranger who is walking by can creep on me?”, she shook her head, grinning, “no. so I can creep on you.” emphasis on the I as she pointed at herself. you suppressed a smile and challenged her, “I´ll do it if you do it”. Tess sometimes forgot that you admired her body the same way she did yours, so your request surprised her but she just shrugged, “sure, okay”, moving her hands to her back to free herself of the last piece of fabric on her upper body, you doing the same thing, slightly shy once you were left topless, your hands over your tits as you looked at the water, dipping a toe in to gauge the temperature.

“oh fuck thats cold” you cold feel goosbumps forming on your skin and she was definitely bolder than you, immediately wading into the water, knee deep within seconds, braving through the initial shock, teeth clenched until she got over it, waving you in, her body mesmerizing, strong and almost god-like in the light of the midday sun. “come on, its fine, you can do it” she encouraged, endeared by the way you held your body then, arms clasped around yourself for comfort. you tensed up as you took a few steps in, Tess lowered herself in the meantime, submerging her whole body except for her head in the cool waves, “trust me sweetheart, this feels great”, so you just took the final step and mirrored what she was doing, a gasp as you felt the cold all over your skin, a few seconds of discomfort until you felt the utter satisfaction of being one with the elements like that on a warm summer day. “come here”, she ordered, so you swam over to her, feeling her pull you closer underwater, your hands around her neck then, your legs loosely wrapped around her back as you both stayed like that for a moment, the water running over you in a steady stream, the sound of birds and rustling leaves hanging in the air, a scene straight of of an Impressionist painting, shades of green and blue all around, accents of reflected sunlight on the surface of the river, you right in the middle, it was like you were truly outside of your lives for a moment, which was visible on your faces before you leaned in and kissed. 

after a while you pulled back and felt the sudden urge to try and push her underwater, so you put your arms on her exposed shoulders and applied some force but she just looked at you, patient, smiling, unaffected, “nice try” she uttered, somewhat condescending; she was clearly not going to be overpowered and you knew it but it was a thing you liked to do sometimes, testing her strength to get a little turned on by how impossible it was to match it. eventually, you gave up but before you could think about swimming away she did what you had tried to do but she did it successfully, pushing you under the surface, not too hard but keeping her hands on your head for a few seconds as you shut your eyes and felt the silence of being totally engulfed by water, a feeling you hadn´t experienced in years, which admittedly wasn´t all that unpleasant. after she let go and you came back up for air you immediately splashed water onto her face, shaking your head as you wiped your eyes and adjusted your soaking wet hair. “you know” you said, staring at her, out of breath, “you could fully drown me right now and nobody would ever know. I didn´t tell a soul I´m here, so, you could get away with it”, she was moving her arms through the water in a soothing motion as she returned your look, amused by your strange remark, “well fuck, you got me. this whole thing was just an elaborate scheme to get you out here and kill you”, you kept standing where you were, water dripping down your chest as you responded “yeah I figured, that´s your thing right?. kidnapping fantasies”, she shook her head, “okay easy, a little too far”, but you weren´t done yet, “no? you don´t like that? thinking about tying me up and-”. before you could even finish the sentence she pulled you down and put her hand over your mouth to shut you up “okay, you´re fucking insane”. Tess reacted that way partially because you´d struck a cord, she didn´t have violent sexual fantasies but she did like the idea of restraining you, which got her riled up as you joked about it.

the whole ordeal ended in you both being half submerged in the waves and laughing, holding hands as you both laid down on your backs to float on the water, the sun warming your front side as the river cooled the back, a delicious contrast, about fifteen minutes of peaceful silence and bliss, your fingers interlaced so you wouldn´t drift away from each other, more relaxed than you could remember being in ages. 

after you got out of the water you laid down in the grass by the shore, waiting for your skin to dry off before you could get dressed again, the breeze gently caressing your nearly nude bodies. 

eventually you both sat upright, looking around at the scenery as you started talking again. 

“can I ask you something personal?” you said after a while, your head resting on your knees as you looked at her from the side, Tess was ripping out single strands of grass absentmindedly as she looked back at you, “another question about perverted kinks I might have?”, you laughed, rolling your eyes at her, “no.”, “go on then”. “did you ever consider the whole getting married and having kids thing? when you were younger I mean”. 

Tess had a joke on her tongue about not being the type of woman that people would love to bring home to their parents, but she decided to be earnest, sensing that you were actually interested. “kids definitely not. and marriage, hm.. well, when I was in my 20s I was busy just surviving and figuring my shit out, so I never thought about it back then, but sure, when I was in my 30s and people around me started having kids and settling down, it did cross my mind sometimes. but if I´m being totally honest, I think that wouldn´t have been the right way for me. maybe if I´d met the right person, but not a huge white wedding..” she shook her head at the thought, you were listening with deep interest, “maybe an elopement or something, I do like that idea. but also, I witnessed a good amount of nasty divorces in my time, truly awful shit, so I think this is actually a pretty fortunate situation to be in at my age” she motioned back and forth between you two, smiling conspiratively, you nodded, returning the smile. “that makes sense, I mean look at my parents.. that shit was not good”, she made a sound of agreement “yeah exactly. but what about you?”, she leaned closer then, tapping your leg. “me?”, “yes, what´s your stance on all that, you´re young, you still have time”. you sat up then, leaning back on your hands, staring off into the distance as you thought about it. “god I don´t know...”, Tess was still looking at you, “well I think you´re gonna make some lucky woman lose her fucking mind”, she chimed in, you stared at her then, “stop, no, I´m with you right now and I like it this way, I don´t want to imagine some potential future wife”. it struck Tess then that she´d implied the obvious, that you two were not going to be with each other for decades to come, so she softened a little as she realized that you did not like that thought at all, turning to humor to lighten the mood again. “well, you know, if your dad is still single then, I´ll make him take me as his plus one to your wedding.” your expression lightened then, touching her thigh for emphasis as you said, “well, if you want me to cheat on my wife on our wedding day, sure, go ahead and do that”. Tess pulled you towards her then, kissing your cheek before you laid your head on her chest, “sure, if you ever need a reason to break off an engagement, just call me, I´ll come be your homewrecker”. 

a while later you both felt your bodies growing weaker from the heat of the sun and lack of food, so you made your way back down the trail and stopped at a place to eat lunch. not many words were exchanged during that meal because you were both starving and recovering from moving around way than you usually do in a day. by the time you were back in her apartment she announced, “okay, either I´ll have to make myself the strongest coffee ever or we have to take a nap. you decide”, it was an easy decision, “yeah, let´s sleep for a while I´m exhausted”. 

as she laid down on the couch you went over to her record collection and looked for something that would be soothing as background music, something that could lull you to sleep. she had at least 40 records to choose from, all kinds of genres, mostly from the 70s to 90s but also some modern ones you recognized.“this is impressive” you marveled, as you turned some of them over, inspecting the slightly aged but beautiful covers, Tess already had her eyes closed and felt herself drifting off as she said “thank you. I mean, I´ve had some time to collect those, I think I got the first one at least 25 years ago”, you smiled to yourself then and couldn´t help but say what was on your mind, “so some of these are older than me huh?”, you could hear a groan from across the room, “oh that´s just perfect, really, very romantic of you. how about you pick one and get over here already”, she responded, unwilling to admit that she liked your teasing, so you made your choice and let some soft tune play as you laid down on top of her, her arms around your back, the side of your face positioned on her in a way that allowed you to hear her heartbeat. 

it was a sweet feeling, to lay there with the balcony door cracked, a soft gust of wind every once in a while as you drifted in and out of sleep for about an hour, until you were both awake again but didn´t move yet, enjoying the quiet intimacy of the moment, because it was all you´d wanted for so long, to have the luxury of time, to spend some of it in comfortable silence, only communicating via light touches and caresses. 

later that day you went outside one more time to go stock up on groceries for the week, Tess urging you to get whatever you might want to have at hand in the following days, asking you about which of her ideas for dinner you liked best, so you ended up spending a lot of time just walking around the isles and figuring out each other´s tastes, scanning the liquor shelves together to decide on what would be best to share on her balcony later. it hit you while watching her prepare dinner that night, not on your phone at all during that hour because you loved watching her move around the kitchen, that it felt like you´d lived together for a while, since it all fell into place so naturally. you tried to remain in the present moment but there was a slight pain you felt in your chest whenever you remembered that your situation was only temporary, that you hadn´t actually moved in with her, that you were a guest and would not get the chance to spend that many days in a row together again for a good while. Tess had similar thoughts as she felt you admiring her from across the room, pushing up her sleeves on purpose to show off her arms as she worked her way through the recipe. it was in her nature, that deep desire to center her life around someone else, to devote her energy and time to the needs of another person, she´d never loved living on her own even though she let other believe that she did, it gave her too much time to talk down on herself, to obsess over her shortcomings, to sit with herself long enough to get tired of her mind and go to sleep much earlier than needed. Tess did not thrive in isolation, she needed her alone time and space to unwind, certainly, but that night it was so clear to her, that she was meant to share her life with someone, that she was never happier than when she could tell that another woman was glad to be in her presence, glad to be taken care of by her, that she wanted to live with someone, with you, and would miss having you there quite intensely once you´d have to leave. thankfully, you both got yourselves out of that mood rather quickly once she was done cooking and you helped her set the table, a simple thing, yet so delightful to you, the sight of two plates, two glasses, the reminder that you were part of a union now. 

you ate dinner on the balcony and spent another hour after that sipping on the drinks you´d bought earlier, a few candles on the table, the faint sound of people on the street below you, an atmosphere that made it very easy to forget the time and stay there together on the wooden bench you´d put a blanket over until it was about 11:30 pm, your eyes getting heavy from the booze and the outdoorsy activities earlier that day. for a moment you both rested against each other out there, almost falling asleep because the night air was the perfect temperature, but eventually you both managed to go brush your teeth and fall into bed, heavy and satisfied as she pushed you over to be big spoon, the warmth of her body against your back enough to make you fall asleep within minutes, comforted by her grip on you, even when she was exhausted, that same firmness to her touch, her determination to have you as close as possible.

the next day Tess was clear about the fact that she´d have to show you all her favorite spots downtown, after spending the day before outside of the city, so she took you to two cafes, one for the sake of the coffee the other for the sake of their lunch options, so up until 2 pm you were busy just sitting around in the sun, trying all of her usual orders, approving of them, a little jealous that she had access to that many nice spots, you could imagine studying in those cafes for hours. “maybe during finals season you can come visit for a weekend, I can watch you do that” she joked as you told her that, “you´d like that? just watching me type on my fucking laptop?”, she shrugged, smiling as she ripped a piece off the pastry you were sharing, “I´d enjoy watching you do pretty much anything, sweetheart. also yes, I think it would be hot, you being a nerd right in front of me”, teasing you a little, “my grades aren´t high enough to qualify as nerdy I fear”, she pretended to be shocked, “no? well, we can work on that”, “we? you´d help me how exactly?”, “I don´t know. quiz you, promise you a gift for when you come back with perfect scores”, “okay, I do like the sound of that.”.

that day was a little fresher than the day before so at night you had the idea of taking a bath together, which quickly taught you the lesson that sex underwater only sounded good in theory and was a mess in practice, so you settled on sitting across from each other in the tub with your legs touching, every now and then leaning in to kiss, you putting your lips to her knee after, which was an unexpected tenderness that hit her right at her core, the sight of you bending your head down to places a few soft kisses on her leg. 

on your fourth day with her, it rained from morning til night, so it was an easy decision to stay in bed til noon, to be lazy and stay in your loungewear and order take out, putting on a film while relaxing in the living room as it kept pouring outside, chatting about anything and everything, coaxing more and more personal information out of each other, longer, more intimate stories about your lives, passing the time on the couch, switching between various states of undress, paying no attention to what was playing on the TV. later that night you both got the sudden urge to go outside and get a drink, so you put on some nice clothes, stood in the bathroom together as you fixed your hair and felt a shared giddiness over the prospect of walking arm in arm to the bar she´d picked out, the streets still smelling of wet earth, the moon almost full, people hurrying to their dinner dates or back home, that buzz of the night time in a bigger city. you´d both come to realize that you shared a love for date nights, the cozy darkness, the intimate feeling of sitting in the corner of a crowded room somewhere at that hour, slightly buzzed, faces flushed, hands innocently resting on each other´s thighs as you spoke, you´d both miss it, having a reason to randomly step out of the house at 10pm. you´d miss the feeling of walking up the stairs together a few hours later, tipsy, laughing at each other for almost missing a step and stumbling, grabbing each other´s arms for support. it was a light, effortless kind of joy that made you glow, your faces permanently stuck in a smile while you washed your faces together and helped each other out of your clothes, clumsily feeling each other up before you fell into a deep sleep. 

on Friday you were ready to move around again after you spent majority of the day before being lazy, so you did whatever came to mind as you walked around the city together. after spending some time at the local park and getting lunch, you came across a pretty large thrift store and decided to just take a look around, but it quickly turned into you getting an idea: you wanted to find her clothes you thought she´d look hot in, so you picked a few shirts here and there, both longsleeve and shortsleeve, a jacket you thought that would suit her, until she eventually told you to slow down with the makeover quest, amused by your enthusiasm over styling her. it moved her in a way, to see that you knew her well enough by then to skip over any clothes that were too feminine, briefly wandering over the the men´s section to check out the bigger vintage tees, it contrasted the feeling she´d often had as a young girl, being pressured by others to dress more like a “lady”, something was healing about it, to have you picking out styles for her that actually matched her taste.

she was reluctant at first but after enough begging and kissing her she gave in and changed into some of the things you´d handed to her, unable to deny that you had an eye for her physique and what would suit her, what she´d feel comfortable in. you practically gawked at her as she looked at herself in the mirror. “you know, maybe I fucked up here, you look a little too good, I don´t want other girls to start hitting on you” you mused, your eyes traveling up and down her body, which got a laugh out of her, “I think you need to chill a little with all that praise, I´ll start believing you eventually” she wasn´t going to admit it, but she did enjoy it, the fact that you never held back with compliments, that you almost made her feel shy or blush at times, which was something that usually never happened to her.  “well you should, I´m not just being nice” you insisted, as she came over to you and let you inspect her from up close, “you know, I also have some ideas for things I´d like to see you in” she said, a smile as she lightly traced your bare arm with her fingers, “oh you don´t have to convince me, I´ll try on whatever you want” you said, a smugness to your expression, “anything?”, you nodded, “hm, good to know”, her tone gave away what she was thinking. “what kind are you into? lace? satin? see through?”, she shook her head, not expecting that bold of an answer but enjoying the back and forth, “I´m not telling you that”, “you should buy me something”, you said, batting your eyelashes at her, “buy you lingerie? you want the sugar mommy thing, is that it?” she teased, “jesus how do you even know what that is Tess..” you said, slightly unnerved, which was funny to her, “baby I´m not ancient, I know things. but sure, yes, I will gladly buy you something pretty, although I only really give a fuck about what´s underneath”. 

the rest of that day passed very quickly, the way the whole week had, by Saturday morning you couldn´t believe that you´d already spent that much time at her place because it felt like you´d just arrived the day before, like you were at the beginning of your stay, but to your dismay, it was already coming to an end. 

the days before Tess had been the chef for dinner or you´d gone out to eat, so for your final night at her place you decided that you´d prepare her something. there was a pasta dish that you´d perfected over the years because it was your comfort meal, so you told her to sit back and relax as you assembled all the ingredients you´d need, but she wouldn´t, she leaned against the kitchen counter instead and watched you, enthralled by the sight of you carefully picking herbs off their stems, tasting the sauce over and over to get it to the exact spice level you wanted it, your face shiny from the effort, your cheeks flushed from the steam of the pasta water, all of it turned her on but she tried her best to not get in your way and touch you too much, only giving you the occasional hug from behind here there, whispering sweet things about how good you looked working with your hands, breaking a sweat. 

one thing that you´d done the entire week was to switch between sitting across from each other and next to each other during meals at home because both of the options had their own appeal; sitting next to each other was sweet and intimate, legs touching as you ate, easy access, stealing touches here and there, sitting across from each other was sexier and more charged, since that´s the way you´d sit on a first date, that unavoidable eye contact, the almost confrontational nature of being in your direct line of sight, the ability to lean back and steal glances while the other person wasn´t aware of your gaze, or pretended not to be because it felt good to be looked at like that. 

on that last night, you sat across from each other, inside because the weather had gotten a little too fresh to eat on the balcony. as soon as Tess took the first bite, you realized that you liked it a lot, the roles being reversed, you watching closely for her reaction, hoping for signs of pleasure, which came, an approving nod from her as soon as she swallowed, “no notes”, she said, smiling, charming you, a satisfied look on your face as you joined her in eating. what Tess didn´t know, was that you´d picked up on certain preferences of hers over the week, so you´d added things to the sauce you usually wouldn´t have added, because it was more important to you that it would be to her exact taste, you couldn´t haven cared less about your own feelings about the meal, which was a beautiful thing, to be so preoccupied with pleasing someone else that you forgot about yourself in the process. you could understand why she was always so eager to be of service, you saw the appeal as you watched her clear the plate, not leaving one piece of the pasta untouched. 

after you were both done, Tess quickly realized that she didn´t want to waste any of the remaining hours you had left being unable to touch you, so she suggested that you should move to the couch, grabbing some chocolate from the kitchen, breaking a part off to offer it to you as a palette cleanser before getting comfortable next to you. by then, you knew how you liked to sit together when you wanted to talk properly, your legs on her lap, her hand on your thigh as you sat there, eyeing each other until you broke the silence. “I can´t believe this already our last night..” your tone quiet and earnest, she nodded, “yeah, me neither. feels like it has only been a day or two, honestly, the time passed way too fucking quickly” you cracked a smile then, moving some of her hair out of the way to place your hand on her neck, a lovestruck look. 

during the week neither of you brought it up because it would have been a mood killer but since it was the end of the week Tess felt comfortable asking you “so uhm. did he reach out to you at all while you were here?”, apprehension in there, you knew of course who the “he” in question was. a shake of your head, “no, thank god. probably because I told him I´d call this weekend, I guess I´ll do that tomorrow”. she nodded, absentmindedly caressing you, “hm, good, that´s good. didn´t hear from him either. be honest, did it cross your mind at all?” she genuinely wanted to know if you´d just been good at bluffing or if you´d actually forgotten about the potential horror of being found out by him during your stay with her.

 you thought about it, “surprisingly no, I didn´t think about it, at least not consciously. I guess because I was just glad we had this time to ourselves and I really didn´t want to ruin it for myself by worrying” she agreed, “yeah same for me, I kind of forgot about it til just now to be honest” you shared a moment of silence, contemplating the issue. “looks like we´re both great at compartmentalizing hm?”, you joked, grinning at her, Tess couldn´t help but laugh then, “you´re not wrong there, we´re pretty fucking shameless if you really think about it. the next time he calls me I´ll make small talk and act like I didn´t just spend the week…”, “fucking his daughter?” you completed the thought for her, purposely putting it that way. Tess shoved you then, pretending to be scandalized, “wow, you have such a way with words. I was gonna say that I spent the week having the time of my life” she countered, exaggerating a little, trying to get you to feel bad about your crass comment but you knew her too well, “bullshit, you didn´t wanna say that”, she nodded, amused, “maybe, but it´s true. besides, you´re right in the sense that that is of course the one thing he´d focus on. jesus…”.

you could tell that she was getting sucked into a spiral that she´d managed to stay out of all week, so you leaned closer and took her face in your hands, your tone gentle and sweet, “hey, it´s fine, relax” placing a few kisses on her face before reminding her “he won´t find out, no way. how would he?”. she couldn´t argue with that, you´d both been careful and you were both more than decent liars, so she relaxed again, soothed by your touch. “right, yes. but still, we´re kind of fucking insane for this” she could smile again by then, you did too, only shrugging in response, not a care in the world over potential danger, you were simply too happy. she gave you a kiss then, a proper one, to forget all about the previously discussed subject and it worked, within seconds she was too busy pushing you back against the couch cushion and pulling your shirt over your head to think of anything else but the feeling of your warm body in her hands. 

later that night, after you´d spent a good amount of time just laying in bed with the window open and talking because you didn´t want your time to be cut short by sleeping too early, you had something on your mind. you rolled over onto your side, placing your hand on her stomach as you looked at her, “Tess” you said, an unusually timid tone which was endearing to her, “yes sweetie, what is it?”, she moved herself up on the pillow a little to signal that she was listening. “well, I was just thinking, my roommate isn´t coming back until next week..”, “okay. and that means?”, she said, not catching on yet, eyeing you curiously, so you just put it out there. “well, I was wondering if I could persuade you to stay a night...”. she was confused for a moment, “what, in your dorm?”, you nodded, a shyness to your demeanor all of a sudden, waiting for a response. she laughed to herself, “well, wouldn´t that be a little fucked up, someone my age hanging out in a dorm?”, you shook your head, “oh no, I have seen so many odd boyfriends coming and going, nobody would even blink an eye at you, really I mean it”. she smiled then, staring off into space as she considered your proposal, muttering “well, I´d have to take Monday off work..”, so you doubled down, increasingly desperate to prolong your time with her, your hand on her forearm then, a strong grip as you pleaded with her. “please, come on, just one night. I could show you around, it would be fun, I could let you get an image of how I live, now that I got one of how you do”. you had a point there, she couldn´t deny that she liked the idea of getting a glimpse into your life like that, “hmm” you could see that she was close to cracking, so you got up and climbed on top of her, bending down to kiss her neck lightly as you kept whispering “please”, which gave her vivid flashbacks to how you´d first come onto her that night you´d first gotten together, the way she´d been broken by the sound of your begging, and it was working yet again, she sighed and held onto your back as she finally caved and said “okay, okay yes. fuck it, let´s do it”, a shudder going through her from the feeling of your hot breath against her skin, your weight on top of her, until you finally let go and looked at her with the face of someone who´d just won a battle. “you´re fucking killing me here, lady” she said, shaking her head, grabbing your waist as you kept sitting on her legs, a bright red blush on her cheeks, “am I?” you whispered, pleased with yourself for getting under her skin. secretly, Tess loved it, that you often pushed her buttons, that you weren´t discouraged by any of her moments of reluctance but took them as a challenge, she never got frustrated by your teasing because it was too delicious, to be played with like that, to be guided towards certain pleasures she´d deny herself if it wasn´t for you insistence. 

the next morning after having breakfast out on the balcony for the last time, basking in the sun with your legs crossed over each other´s, she helped you pack your things. as you were checking around her bedroom to see if you´d missed a piece of clothing or something else, she grabbed a shirt of hers that you´d worn to bed a few times that week and handed it to you, “here, take this too”. you hesitated for a moment as you reached for it, “really? you won´t miss it?”, she shook her head, “not at all. besides, I like the idea of you sleeping in my clothes when you´re not here. I´m not being that selfless”, you laughed, “okay, well in that case I´ll gladly take it”. 

as she opened her apartment door you took a dramatic final look around, a gentle squeeze on your shoulder as she said, “hey, don´t act like you´ll never see this place again, you´ll be back”, “you think so?” you asked, “oh, I know.” she proclaimed, confident, so you smiled and clung to that sound of conviction as you both made your way downstairs and headed towards her car.

the drive was not that long, about 3 hours, a little slower than by train but not long enough to actually be exhausting. you drove an hour, then stopped for coffee, drove another, then got some mediocre lunch and walked around for a bit before passing the final hour with you feeding her individual pieces of candy as you got comfortable in the passenger seat and handled the job of choosing songs that fit the mood, every now and then getting a rise out of her by touching her where you knew she liked to have your hands the most, while she was trying to keep her eyes on the road. 

around 3 pm you reached your destination, she´d of course picked you up in your college town once before, so she had no trouble finding the street you lived on. the semester wasn´t going to start until a week later, so the streets weren´t that crowded even though it was a Saturday, you could tell that about half your fellow students were back, while the other half was probably still either still back home or somewhere savoring the last few days of freedom before things would go back to business again. 

Tess vaguely recalled some of the buildings as you walked up to your dorm, but she found herself liking the atmosphere more than she´d expected, her own college town had been more urban, so it was interesting to see a campus that was more on the isolated side. 

once you were in your room, you opened the window to let some fresh air in and sat down on your bed as Tess inspected the details of your space, trying not to feel the slight burn of self-consciousness in your chest as you watched her curiously inspecting the details of your space, but for once she didn´t have anything to say, she was genuinely absorbed in the attempt to figure you out, to see how you liked to live, how you made yourself feel at home and comfortable. after a few minutes she joined you on the bed, the two of you sprawled out as much as the rather small bedframe allowed you to be, arms and legs touching in various places as you laid there, staring at the ceiling, relaxing after the drive. after brief moment of comfortable silence you could hear her laugh to herself and utter “god..” while shaking her head, so you turned to look at her, “what? what is it?”. she turned her head too then, “it´s just. this is pretty fucking mid-life crisis-ey of me, isn´t it?” her hands in the air, vaguely gesturing around, “ending up in a dorm room again at my age. I think I can´t deny that that´s pretty cliché mid-life of me”. you laughed, endeared by her moment of self-deprecation, “well if it makes you feel better, people my age have actually recently coined the term quarter-life crisis, so we´re kind of in it together”, she laughed too then, “what, really? that´s a thing?” you nodded, she considered it, “well, I think the takeaway there should be that we´re all in crisis at all ages, huh”, you nodded, reaching for her hand, lacing your fingers through hers, “exactly, that´s the enlightened take. so, no need to feel bad about yourself or question your weird behavior, if it´s gonna be ongoing, right?” you joked, “sure, I can just mess around with a girl in college and free myself of the knowledge that it´s technically kind of pathetic” you gasped as she finished that sentence, overly dramatic, “pathetic?? ouch”. Tess pulled your hand up to kiss it then, patting your head afterwards, “not on your part, baby”. 

after about 45 minutes of regaining some of your energy, you both made your way outside again and you gave her the promised tour of all the places you usually spent most of your days at: your lecture halls, the buildings where you had your seminars, the dining hall, the little park that was located in the middle of your campus. the thing that made it easier on your part was that you that yours was an impressive one as far as college campuses went, large historic buildings, a lot of nature surrounding your area, a rather idyllic vibe to it all. Tess seemed to have a genuine interest in everything you showed her, which warmed your heart. she kept asking you things that you didn´t even consider telling her about because they seemed minute to you, but to her it was a delight, to finally get to know the structure of your daily life, she couldn´t remember the last time she´d been so eager to get a picture of how someone moved through the world, and it hit her as you showed her around, how you´d awakened a curiosity in her, a deep need to know as much as she could about the person she felt so devoted to. 

as you walked down a particular path you often took after classes, you pointed towards a wooden bench under a large tree that was still in bloom, “oh see, this is where I spent many miserable afternoons, just listening to music and feeling sorry for myself, it was great”. Tess laughed as she went over and sat down, looking around to see the view you´d had all those times, “I hope those days are over now”, you joined her, stretching your legs out and sighing, “you think you magically fixed all my issues?”, you teased as she put her arm behind your back, “all of them? jesus, care to tell me what that endless list entails?”, she joked back in a low tone, “oh you know. general melancholy, loneliness, self-pity, being into women that could be my mom, the usual” she shoved your leg then, “you´re disgusting”, but you could see a hint of a smile out of the corner of your eye. 

“but for real, I don´t have to worry about you, do I?”, it felt good, to know that she felt the need to make sure you´d be fine on your own, you assured her, “no, I´m much better now than last year. but feel free to maybe worry a little, I don´t mind that..” you said, grinning at her. “oh and you´re gonna have to get better at texting, because I can´t call you during lectures or while I´m at the library”, she laughed, “so I can keep you from actually learning something?”, you shook your head, “I´ll only do it during the boring ones. promise”, “right, sure, I´ll see what I can do about that”.

“would sexting encourage you?”, Tess made a face of disgust then, “no? you think that´s my thing, typing sleazy shit into my phone?”, you knew she was not the type for all that but the image was funny to you, “okay jeez, guess I´ll find other ways to fantasize”, “I can send you audio messages of me reading some book, that should do the trick”, she teased, “fuck off. I never should have told you about that, it really went to your head that I love your voice”, she smiled, leaning closer to you then, whispering in your ear as she held your face, “do you?”, you sighed, defenseless against her, a shiver on your neck as she kept fucking with you until you eventually pushed her off and tried to get your face to a normal temperature again, a satisfied expression on her face as she backed off because a few people were walking by.

“last year this place was my depression spot, but this semester I can sit here and think about you instead, how does that sound?”, you said after a few moments of silence, “better. much better” she did like that image, “or you know. you could focus on your academic goals, just a thought”, and as if she´d summoned her by mentioning it, you spotted a former professor of yours from afar as she was walking in your general direction. 

at first you thought she might pass you by but you locked eyes and smiled, so you tapped Tess on the shoulder, “she was my prof last year, I think I should say Hi”, but you barely got the sentence out before she already stood a few feet away and greeted you, so you stood up to get a little closer. “hey, good to see you!”, you returned the politeness and exchanged a few words about what you´d done over the summer, she´d been one of better professors you´d had, actually good at teaching and always eager to get to know her students, asking what was wrong if anyone ever seemed out of it during class, so it was easy to make conversation. 

“you´re not taking any of my classes this year, right?” she asked, signaling disappointment, you shook your head “no, sadly not, but maybe next semester”, “right, well I´m sure we´ll see each other around still”, Tess was observing the exchange with keen interest and as your professors´s eyes wandered over to her you said “oh yeah, I´m here with a.. family friend, to show her around because she lives nearby”, Tess gave a brief nod and smile, amused by your choice of words. “then I´ll leave you guys to it, have a lovely time! see you around!” she´d used your name at the end of that sentence rather affectionately and Tess watched her with a hint of judgment in her eyes as she walked away, immediately shaking her head as you sat back down on the bench, laughing to herself, “wow”. 

“what?” you asked, confused by that reaction “she was fucking flirting with you”, “huh??” you said, unsure if you´d heard her right, “oh come on, it was so obvious”, you protested, “Tess, she has a husband and two kids”. “that doesn´t mean shit”, she wouldn´t back down, “it doesn´t??”, your expression one of disbelief then. “no. married women are freaks, trust me, I´ve had my experiences”, you couldn´t believe that she was insisting on it but then it dawned on you that she was jealous because they were both women around the same age, because she maybe thought that she fit your type, so you decided to mess with her, flattered by the wave of possessiveness that had come over her just from watching you be polite to someone who shared some of her characteristics. “well, in that case I seem to have a good back up plan if you ever decide to dump me”, grinning as you said this.

she immediately shook her head, her index finger moving back and forth in the air, a show of protest, “oh no, if this ends, it´ll be because of you, I´m not going anywhere, so you´ll have to do the breaking up if you wanna get rid of me”, you returned the energy, “well I won´t do it either, so, I guess we´re stuck with each other?”, she smiled, leaning back and closing her eyes as the clouds parted and let the sun through, her face turned towards the warmth, “seems that way”. 

the rest of the afternoon you spent getting lunch and coffee at a place you often went to, sitting in the sun and people watching, letting the time pass while you walked around, stopping here in there to walk into stores or buy a cold drink. naturally, you ended up back in your room with nothing else to do but get rid of the clothes you´d sweat through while walking around all day and getting your hands on each other, clumsy at first since you had gotten used to her much bigger bed, but you made it work, her hand between your legs as you made out, getting you worked up and soaked before she got down between your thighs and ate you out like she hadn´t done it in weeks, even though it had just been a day, messy and desperate, her hands pulling you down onto her face again each time she could feel you moving away, pushing your legs open if you squeezed them together, doing her best to turn you into an absolute mess, turned on from your desperate whining, your fingers in her hair, the taste of you all over her face, she´d never get tired of it, having you in your most vulnerable state, all to herself.

the thing that you realized while living with Tess was that she was a spontaneous lover, she didn´t have specific times of day where she needed it the most, she wasn´t a morning or a night person, it was unpredictable and you loved it that way, that she sometimes got random bursts of intense desire during the day, it was one of your favorite things about being around her so much, that you´d sometimes just be relaxing on the couch together and somehow end up having the most mind blowing sex at a random time like 5 pm. she realized while you were living with her how much she loved it, not planning hook-ups, but just responding to desire whenever it called to her because she had someone close by who wanted her, all the time, the reciprocal thing of “if you´re in the mood, I´m in the mood”. your week together had given you both a new relationship to your sexuality, it had become more playful and free but also more intense because the deep emotional bond was there. she never came hard with hookups because as much as she did not want to admit it, Tess was absolutely the type to need that loving component to really lose herself and get off in a truly satisfying way. 

you kept laying there for a while after, you fully undressed and she in her underwear, touching and caressing each other as you rested your eyes for a moment, before you got up to shower and get changed before going out for a drink. 

you knew where to take her, there weren´t many bars to choose from but one was a safe bet, it was the one that your roommate and you frequented most nights because it was not too overpriced, not too far away from campus, and had a veranda that was ideal for the warmer seasons. you and Tess stayed there for about an hour and a half, debriefing your day, you asking her for her honest opinion about your college, the vibe she was getting, her admitting that she was actually kind of jealous of you because being there had made her feel nostalgic for that time of her life even though it had been rough at times, she swirled the ice around in her drink as she thought about how to put it.

“the thing you´ll understand when you´re closer to my age is that even though you did suffer in your younger years and in college, you´ll still miss it, the specific feeling of being young but old enough to do whatever you want, living with friends, doing stupid shit for fun that would feel weird at an older age. I am not saying you have it easy, not at all, but just. try to soak this up” she said, gesturing around at the other people sitting outside, “you should try to enjoy your last year, really, don´t let me distract you from all of this too much.”. you smiled at her the entire time she spoke because you really liked it when she was more earnest, she always put things in a way that made sense to you, and you were grateful to have her perspective, you pulled her hand over onto your lap then, “I will think of you a lot, but yes, I´ll try to make the most of it, thank you for caring about all that, really”.

Tess patted your hand, “you should do shrooms or something, really get the most out of your student life” she joked, “oh sure, yeah, great advice”, “wait, you never told me, are you a party goer?”, you narrowed your eyes at her, “didn´t I tell you about how much of a loser I was last year? my friends dragged me out a few times but other than that, no”, she laughed then, leaning back and eyeing you with a hint of intrigue, imagining something, you could tell, so you asked, “what?”.

“oh I was just thinking about how you might look when you´re drunk and dancing with people”, she liked the image, you in some dark room with colorful lights illuminating your smiling face as you moved in unison with another girl, or multiple girls, it did turn her on, she couldn´t deny it.

“well, I wish you could find out” you said, smiling at her, leaning your head on your hands, “if I do end up going out, I´ll probably send you drunk texts and pictures, so there´s that” you added, amused by the idea of her receiving some overly affectionate messages from you at 2 am, she was too, “sounds good to me. what kind of drunk are you? touchy? the one that ends up crying? aggressive?”, you laughed, “I think I´m an emotional drunk, just showering everyone in compliments and random confessions of how much they mean to me, how pretty they are, etc.”, “okay damn, you´re making me jealous there”. “yeah with you it wouldn´t end well, I´d embarrass the fuck out of myself”, she knew what you were alluding to, the fact that “I love you so much” would probably slip out multiple times, “I´d like to see that to be honest” she admitted, you threw her a playful look “one day maybe”. 

around 10 pm you were back in your room, after a slightly tipsy walk back, and tired to make it as homely as possible by lighting a few candles and pulling the curtains half shut, leaving the window cracked, so you could hear some of the faint nightlife noise, laughter from a drunk group of people here and there, a few birds still singing at that hour, nothing city-like about it, no cars honking or sirens blaring because your town was rather secluded. Tess was soothed by it, the change of scenery, and you could tell as you saw her laying there in your bed with her arms behind her head, her eyes closed and a faint smile on her sun-kissed face as she waited for you to join her, her freckles visible even in the dim light. you snuggled up to her because there was not enough space for you both to spread out the way you had in her bed, but neither of you minded, it almost felt the way sleepovers had felt as a kid, being huddled up like that, she felt younger in that moment and she liked it, it was

comforting to be so far away from everything that tethered her to her usual routine, in the middle of someone else´s life.

you laid there with your arms wrapped around each other, your face against her chest, the blanket only pulled up to your waist because it was warm enough, both quiet for a while until you spoke up. “so. when are we seeing each other again”,your tone deeply serious, which was endearing to Tess, the fact that she was still there and you were already thinking about your reunion, clearly anxious about how long it would be until then, she thought about it as she slipped her hand under your shirt.“hm, let´s see, I can´t really take off work again in the next few weeks, but weekends are always good. and I know you should probably try to settle in here before coming back to my place, so how about the weekend after next one?”, you nodded, “okay, yes. oh wait, I don´t have classes on Mondays, so I could stay a day longer, I don´t mind if it´s a work day for you, we still have the morning and I´ll take a late train so we can have dinner too. or is that stressful for you?”, “no, that´s perfect, let´s do it. two weeks, that should be fine right?”, she said while glancing down at you, your grip on her suddenly tighter as you thought about the time you´d spend apart, you sighed, “should be, yeah. but I´ll still miss you”, she caressed your back in a soothing motion then, “I know, me too”. 

that night you both woke up multiple times but you weren´t bothered by it because you just used the few minutes you were awake to change positions to lay more comfortably again and to give each other some sleepy kisses on the shoulder or back or whatever body part was closest, hands always finding their way back under the fabric of your clothes, a lazy sensuality to those little windows of time where you were awake during the night. 

the next morning you grabbed breakfast at a place around the corner because you knew Tess was a coffee freak and would love their seasonal menu of various cold brews and you were right, she was blissed out sitting there with you in the morning sun. “you´re trying your best to make me come back here, aren´t you?” she said after she´d gotten up to order herself a second beverage, you just smiled, “maybe. is it working?”, she laughed, running her hands through her hair and taking in the surroundings, she had to admit she´d come to like it there, “kind of yeah. who knows, maybe one day I´ll get a spontaneous burst of recklessness and come surprise you”, your eyes lit up then, “please do that, I´m not kidding.” you loved the idea of living your life, going about your day, while knowing that there was always a slim chance that she might randomly appear at your doorstep one evening, she could tell, so she´d at least consider it, “okay, I´ll see what I can do”. 

your last few hours together were marked by that beautiful feeling of seeing a town right before it wakes up, the sun golden but not hot yet, only a few people besides you out on the streets, both you and Tess could appreciate the feeling of being in the middle of the city on a busy night, but for your farewell it was ideal to just sit there together and soak up the quiet, warm, almost dreamlike scenery. 

what you´d both realized during the course of your week together, was that neither of you were afraid to hold hands in public, to be affectionate and obviously romantically involved. you´d never even had the discussion if it was okay, most likely because you were both so aware of the limited amount of time you had together, that you wouldn´t let fear of judgment keep you from pulling your hand to your face or her from kissing your cheek when you were close enough to do it. there was a relaxed, natural feeling to your tenderness with each other, it was never awkward or clumsy, both of you had the instinct to reach out, all the time, whether you were sitting next to each other, or standing in line somewhere, or laying in bed, your hands always seemed to find their way to the exact spot where the other person wanted it, it hadn´t taken long at all for you to give each other exactly the kind of intimacy you needed. Tess had often been accused of being aloof and distant, even with women she was having sex with, so it surprised her to find that it wasn´t just an intrinsic issue, that she wasn´t fundamentally unromantic or fucked up, that she´d just been waiting to meet someone who brought that side of her out without force, which was a central thing about your appeal to her, the way you loved her without pushing her to give you more of herself than she was willing to, because you trusted that whatver she would offer would be more than enough.

in return, you loved that she was so calm in her obsession over you, it was clear that she was deeply into you, but she left you space to breathe, Tess knew that you didn´t need her to smother you to feel loved, and it created this deeply peaceful bond, one where both of you felt held and seen without ever feeling caged in, quite the opposite, you´d never felt freer than when you held and kissed each other, felt each other there at night or in the morning. 

around 11 am you walked Tess to her car, both of you walking much slower than necessary, eventually reaching the spot where she´d parked and unsure what to do, now that it was time to say goodbye. 

she put her bag in the backseat and came over to where you were standing, a parallel to how you´d greeted each other at the start of the week, her resting against the passenger door, you facing her, a silence, a shared moment of unwillingness to part ways, something somber and fragile in both of your expressions. you nervously shifted your weight as she looked at you, the way the light was hitting your face, the way your neck was bent, that space right above your shoulder where she´d placed countless kisses the days before, suddenly overcome with utter devastation over the fact that she´d return to an empty apartment, that she´d sleep alone again, that she wouldn´t feel you moving next to her in the night, that she wouldn´t spend her afternoons on the couch with your head in her lap. Tess couldn´t stop listing all the things she´d miss and without realizing a few tears had formed in her eyes, you caught it, looking at her while she was so lost in thought that she didn´t even realize until you stepped closer and touched her arm, a hint of a smile on your face as you asked, “hey, are you crying?”, unsure if you should comfort her or delight in the fact that she was so affected by the idea of your absence. 

she was slightly embarrassed and adjusted her posture to seem more secure as she briefly dabbed the corner of her eyes, “no…” a very unconvincing tone, because she knew you knew. you put your arms around her waist then, leaning in to kiss her temple, staring at her until she collected herself and met your eyes, her hands around your neck as she said, “listen, I know I am not the best at making speeches, but I need you to know that this whole week has been a dream, really. I can´t remember the last time I had this many good days in a row.” she was deeply serious about it, so you were too as you answered, “me neither. thank you isn´t enough to be honest, there was literally not one moment that I didn´t enjoy”, Tess could tell you meant it, and it made her feel good about herself, because that was all she´d hoped for, that you´d leave her place feeling better than when you´d come there, and she´d succeeded, very much so. 

“so, in two weeks then?” you said, a gentle smile, still holding onto her, “yes. be good in the meantime, eat well, sleep well, have some fun, all that. okay? none of that shit from last year” there was something parent-like about the way she´d phrased that, so you couldn´t help but say, “yes, mommy” which earned you a light slap from her, she wouldn´t let you get under her skin with that word, she was too stubborn to admit that it kind of turned her on. “shut up, I mean it! if you don´t look healthy the next time I see you, we´ll have a problem, miss”, you liked her slightly stern way of caring for you, it was a hot contrast to her softer side that you´d brought out, “okay, noted. I guess if there´s a serious issue I´ll just come to your place for a day, that should fix whatever´s wrong with me” you said in a low tone, playing with a strand of her hair, doing your best to make her feel weak in her knees. Tess had gotten used to it and grown to enjoy it, your shameless way of toying with her. 

“sure, if there´s an emergency, I´ll play nurse” she teased, gaining the upper hand again by giving you a deep kiss that left you flushed and frustrated over the fact that you´d have to wait fourteen days to do that again. “I´ll fucking miss you.” you uttered, shaking your head, you knew it was time to let go, because otherwise you´d stand there til nightfall, but you had one last thing to say, a stillness to you as you told her, “I love you.” the warmest smile on her face that you´d ever seen, a brief moment of her basking in the light of those words before she pulled you in for a final hug, whispering “I love you too.” as her head briefly rested on your shoulder, her arms tight around you, both of your eyes closed, your hearts beating slowly in unison. there was nothing stressful about that confession because the feeling of loving each other had been so palpable between you all the days before, neither of you were shocked or surprised, you were just full of warmth, flooded by a deep sense of ease, the kind that fills your body with a sensation that evokes the visual of a river of gold, running slowly through your core, spreading to your face, leaving you tingling all over, close to sighing from relief, from joy, from everything you´d come to cherish about your connection. 

for a few seconds you stayed like that until you squeezed each other´s hand and separated. once Tess sat behind the wheel, she pulled the window down, so you could lean in and rest your arms there for a moment, looking at her all doe eyed as you said, “call you later tonight?”, her hand on your arm, “tomorrow. gotta build up some suspense, sweetheart”, that familiar grin of hers as she pulled down her sunglasses. “sure, alright, let´s do that. I do hope you dream about me tonight though” the threatening tone of that statement amused her, “there´s a pretty good chance of that happening, don´t you worry, baby”. eventually you got up, giving her car a light slap on the hood as she started the engine and threw you a final glance, driving off with the window still down, wind in her hair, looking in the rearview mirror to confirm her suspicion, that you´d keep standing there, that you wouldn´t immediately turn around and walk away, a sudden urge in her chest to turn around, to fuck up her work schedule and tell her boss that she´s sick. 

for a good few minutes you just stood there by the side of the road, leaning against a lantern, unable to move on with your day, to go back to your own routine without her by your side. the initial pain that you both felt in your return to being alone was slowly but surely overshadowed by a deep feeling of gratitude, because you realized at the same time that you´d given each other a deeply precious gift; it was undeniable that it would have been ideal to lead a life where you could live together, where you could spend all your time together, neither of you would have ever denied that, you´d both dreamed about it, but your unique situation gave you both the gift of returning to your daily lives on your own with a completely different feeling and outlook compared to before, even though nothing about your circumstances had changed. Tess knew then as she was driving back home that she would not feel the same sense of dread every morning, that she would not dissociate as much as she always had before, that she´d move through her life with an unfamiliar sense of optimism, knowing you were out there and waiting to see her again. she knew that being at work would feel different, simply because she could spend the minutes she´d usually spent zoning out, thinking of you, what you were up to, how you might sound during a call later that day, what you´d want to tell her. 

you felt the exact same way as you walked back to your dorm with a dreamy look permanently frozen on your face because it dawned on you that your senior year of college would not be as hard as your junior year at all, you knew then that it would be easier to get up and move around, to look at the days ahead of you with hope, because regardless of was about to happen, you had someone out there who´d listen to your worries, who´d help you navigate your through it all, who´d always get your spirits up without even trying hard, hearing her voice would be enough to feel better after a rough day, making her laugh would be enough to feel useful, to feel like your presence mattered and helped other people move through their own lives a little easier. your love for her was reviving in a way, you felt stronger and more capable than before, you felt safe and secure knowing that life could shake you up however it wanted and you wouldn´t be scared, at least not the way you´d been before, because she´d be there, always, even if it was just a text or a call, you wouldn´t be lonely anymore, neither of you would be.

you had left each other with the most beautiful thought to hold close to your hearts:

someone out there loves and sees me for who I am at my core. someone out there prays that everything goes well for me. someone out there is waiting eagerly for me to come back to them, and I will. again and again and again.

[jamespotterismydaddy]

Darling

sejanus x reader

A/N: after the blurb i wrote, i knew i had to do more hehe so its the full oneshot

WARNINGS: SMUT!!, pussy slapping, spanking, size kink, sweet boy being rough, brat taming

WORDCOUNT: 1,341 words

You’re a terrible little brat. Sejanus knows it from the moment you walk in in your tiny little sundress. It’s not even hot outside.

“Hi, baby.” You say sweetly.

“Hello, darling. I didn’t think you were gonna be here for another hour.”

“I just missed you.” You whisper out, walking over and looking oh so innocent with your hands behind your back. You place yourself in his lap.

“I missed you too but you know I gotta study.” He sighs as you play with his collar.

“Okay.” You reply but don’t get up.

“You’re distracting me.”

“I’m not.” You start running your hand up and down his chest.

“Can you wait in my room, sweetheart? I won’t be too much longer.” His hand trails up your back and down to your waist. He would never be able to focus with you here.

“I don’t want to wait. I want you now. You’ve studied enough.” You say petulantly.

“There’s no need to be this way.” He says gently as he runs his fingers through your hair. “Can you go and wait for me please?”

You roll your eyes and get up with a huff, storming off to his room and leaving him thinking about what could’ve made you act up like this.

He continues studying, but stops fifteen minutes early in hopes of being able to talk it through with you. When he walks into his room, you’re laying on his bed on your tummy with your skirt riding up so much that it barely covers your ass.

“Tell me what’s bothering you, sweetheart.” His voice is so kind, it almost makes it difficult to do what you’re about to do.

“You’re bothering me.” You don’t even look at him as you speak, kicking your feet back and forth that are adorned with cute frilly socks.

“I can’t fix it if I don’t know what i’ve done wrong.”

“Maybe i’ll go have a chat with Coryo. I’m sure he could attend to me.”

“Coryo? No, I can take care of you. You’re my girlfriend.” He looks a little hurt by the comment.

“I think he might take even better care.”

It dawns on him and Sejanus realizes what you’re trying to do now. You want to bring out his jealousy, make him fuck you good but he’s not going to give in that easily. Though, he’ll let you think that.

“Lie on your back.” He murmurs and you smirk to yourself.

“Maybe I don’t wanna.” You say as you twirl a pierce of hair.

He walks closer to you and you flinch when he smacks your ass. Sejanus never hurts you. He treats you like you’re a goddess to be worshipped, not like some brat to be tamed. “Turn over and lie on your back. Now.”

You nibble at your lip, starting to rethink your decisions as you obey him.

“Lift up your skirt and spread those legs.” You listen quickly as he gazes over your glistening thighs. “Look at you, already wet and with no panties on. Were you touching yourself when you were waiting for me?”

“No.” You lie and immediately clench your legs together when he slaps your cunt. You look up at him with shock.

“Don’t lie to me.” He says as he spreads your thighs back open with strong hands.

“I-I was… touching myself, Sej. I’m sorry.” You want so desperately to cover yourself but at the same time, you don’t want him to stop.

“You just can’t be patient, can you? My needy little slut.” He’s never called you that before. “You never listen, baby. I’ve got to do something about it.” He says sternly. “I know what it is… it’s this sweet little cunt’s fault.” He rubs his fingers through your folds before pulling his hand away. “I think it needs some punishment.”

“Ah!” You whimper out and try to squirm away as he gives your pussy another slap but he’s so much stronger than you.

“It’s okay, baby. I know what you need, so be a good girl and take it.” 

He spanks you again, hitting your sensitive pearl and making you writhe. You keep whining out as he slaps it a few times in a row, too quickly for you to count.

“Sej, it hurtsss” You plead with him. He hates the idea of hurting you but he knows this is what you need. And even with the begging and whining, you’re still soaking his fingers with each hit.

“Shh shh… my good girl.” He continues to slap your poor pussy until it aches. You try to close your legs again but he holds them open. “Don’t hide from me.” He gives a firmer slap to your puffy folds and you’re humiliated by the arousal that continues to leak from you.

He gives a few more softer smacks before stopping. “It’s okay, you’re all done now.” He rubs his fingertips on your oversensitive pearl and is surprised when you cum almost right away. You look up at him with watering eyes, the heat rising to your cheeks. “Oh, sweetheart.” He takes you into his arms, cradling you. “You did so well.” He coos. “How’re you feeling?”

“I um… good.” You say truthfully and you’re still aching for him.

“Do you still need to be fucked, baby? Because I won’t be gentle with you.” He says the filthy words so tenderly.

You nod timidly.

“On all fours then.” He says, helping you shift around and propping some pillows under your hips. He takes in the sight of you, so needy and beautiful. “Beg for it.” He commands as he starts to stroke his thick, hard cock.

“Please… please fuck me, Sej. I need it so bad.” You push your hips back to try and entice him and all it does is earn you a spank on each cheek.

He chuckles. “Since you asked so nicely...” He slowly starts to push himself inside you and it never gets easier to take him. He’s so thick and long and you whine out at the perfect stretch, feeling him all the way in your tummy.

He lets you adjust to his size before beginning to thrust in and out of you. Usually he’s so slow and loving, but today, he’s fucking into you like an animal.

“God, you just suck me in. Such a perfect little pussy.” He smacks your ass again as he gives you a proper pounding.

“Sejanus… Sejanus.” It’s all you can say.

“Yeah, not thinking about Coryo anymore, are you? Not when your boyfriend is fucking you like this.” His right hand firmly grips your hip while the left hand goes to pinch your sore pearl. You scream out from the pain-pleasure. “Didn’t realize till now what you needed. Just wanna be my cocksleeve, huh?”

“Y-Yeah… need you so bad.” You murmur out in agreement, clutching the sheets as he drives into you deeper, pounding you into the bed.

“I know. I'll take proper care of you now, hun.” He keeps rubbing your pearl, knowing how close you are so he takes his hand off your hip and presses down on your tummy where he can feel his cock inside of you.

You scream out in response and cream around him. Your pussy clenches so tight that he only gets a few more hard thrusts in before he fills you up with you cum.

He huffs for a second. “God, baby you did so good for me.” He rubs your back as you calm yourself down. “C’mere, love.” He pulls you into his arms so you can rest your head on his chest. “Was it too much?” He asks, holding you as close as possible.

“No, it was perfect.” You whisper into his skin. He presses a kiss to the crown of your head.

“I love you, baby. I’ll never do anything that I think you wouldn’t like. You can always tell me just what you need.” He promises, fingers running through your hair.

And you know truer words have never been said.

taglist (comment to be added): General: @valeskafics @urmomsgirlfriend1 @girlwith-thepearlearring @darylandbethfanforever9 @lovellies @juhdoche @papichulo120627 @watercolorskyy @ophelialaufey @aerangi @ravenclawprincess33

[witchthewriter]

𝐃𝐨𝐦𝐞𝐬𝐭𝐢𝐜 𝐡𝐞𝐚𝐝𝐜𝐚𝐧𝐨𝐧𝐬 𝐰𝐢𝐭𝐡 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐒𝐡𝐚𝐝𝐨𝐰 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐁𝐨𝐧𝐞 𝐜𝐡𝐚𝐫𝐚𝐜𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐬

⤷ gender neutral, ambiguous race, and any size reader. Requests are open, thank you for reading!    

Warnings: book & show spoilers

a/n: I’m trying to write the characters as a mixture of the book and show. Some of the characters act quite differently in the books and it’s a bit difficult to pin point their personality, but I hope I do them justice. Thank you for reading xx

ᴹᵃˢᵗᵉʳˡᶤˢᵗ      

𝑺𝑭𝑾🌿  

𝐁𝐚𝐜𝐤𝐬𝐭𝐨𝐫𝐲: Everyone is settling down into their own homes. I don’t care what is canon and what’s not.

𝐊𝐚𝐳

・Likes things to be in their place. If they aren’t where they left them than he goes into a bit of a tizzy

   “Y/n! Y/n I specifically left them right here and they aren’t right. Here. Where have they gone??”

  “No, you moved them because you thought they were too vulnerable sitting there. Look in the third shelf down to your left.”

*Does what you tell him to do* *is embarrassed* *thanks you but not above a whisper*

・You have a lot of nice things in your home, but the most expensive things are usually the jewels and the jewelry that Kaz has gifted you

・He has a lot of the same clothing, so when you open his side of the closet there’s just ... black ... oh and grey

・His cane is never too far from where he is

・Despises the idea of getting a pet

・And you have to beg and beg

・But none of it worked

・So you had to come up with a plan. It was quite manipulative but hey, how else would you have caught Kaz’s attention?

・The dog you have now was once a puppy who had “accidentally” followed you home

   “How did it follow you home? We live in Ketterdam, there are a million homes here.”

“I guess it liked...me...”

・He ordered it out

・But you didn’t listen and somehow, the pup had wiggled its way into Kaz’s heart

・He swore he wasn’t going to pick up any poops, but that too was a lie

𝐀𝐥𝐢𝐧𝐚

・Once settled in, she comes to realise that she really enjoys the finer things in life

・Big bed, silks, many many pillows

・A big bath with hot water straight from the tap

・She adores a long hot bath, lots of bubbles, with lavender and chamomile, candles, and a good book to read - or just to lay there and soak

・She hates waking up early, but is the first one to crawl into bed (she just really likes being in bed)

・Has her own drawing nook - a desk near a big window where she can get natural light. Many types of pencils, quills, inks, etc. She draws people, memories, landscapes, dreams

・Her drawings are framed and are all over the house

・There’s also a library; a room with a cosy corner that has all kinds of books; fiction and non fiction - historical, religious, fantasy etc

・Oh and she adores having the fire going. She wants it on even if it’s barely even cold

・But she hates chopping wood, so when you tell her that it isn’t cold enough for a fire, she’ll go outside and use The Cut to get the wood.

・Loves when you braid her hair; loves it even more when you give her head a lil massage too

・She fusses over you whenever you’re sick. Making you soup, remembering remedies from her upbringing in the orphanage.

・If you burn yourself, cut or have any other injuries, she is constantly checking on it to make sure it doesn’t get infected

・She doesn’t mind doing the laundry - if it means you’ll fold afterwards

・There are a lot of different oils, perfumes, bath products, hair products all over the bathroom

𝐍𝐢𝐤𝐨𝐥𝐚𝐢

・Yes, he is used to being treated like royalty

・But he’s also experienced life on a ship - and that isn’t pretty (at all...it’s quite awful)

・Yet he has seen his destiny as being a ruler, so the biggest change in both of your lifestyles is ... you

・You would have to learn how to live during court

・You couldn’t just leave your chambers in your pajamas (I mean ... you could but drama would start at court most definitely)

・Both you and Nikolai obviously share the same chambers, and actually you both have your own wing in the castle (So I guess you could just stay in your pajamas if you wanted)

・It’s basically having your own home - or huge apartment

・The majority of the decor is white with gold trimmings and accents. Nikolai said you could change whatever you want

・The castle is never quiet, and there are always people coming and going, but your chambers are very very quiet.

・Nikolai doesn’t snore but does talk in his sleep

・It’s nonsensical, but it’s usually about the dreams he’s having

・You have servants that come and clean up after both you and Nikolai

・When Nikolai is finished for the day, he trots up to your shared wing and slumps against the door once it’s closed

・He sighs undoing his buttons, but you like to be the one to do that

𝐈𝐧𝐞𝐣

・Still very quiet around the home, so you get used to seeing her in different parts of the house in a small amount of time

    “I swear, sometimes there’s two of you!” You once grumbled, while cleaning up a broken tea cup because she popped up out of nowhere

・Doesn’t like loud sudden noises, so you live a bit from civilisation. Not too far though.

・She gets on really well with cats

・You’d end up adopting two kittens that were the only survivors of a litter

・They were tiny, covered in fleas and skinny as can be. But you both fed them, bathed them and made sure they survived

・One is called Umbra, and the other Sol

・You both take on the styling of the home. Inej quite likes the cottage-esque look. However she does want to honor her heritage and there are a lot of colourful cloth that drapes across the ceiling

・Inej had Jesper insert a rod that holds a long silk cloth so that she can practice her acrobatic skills

・Jesper visits as often as he can, and is usually found hung over in the spare bedroom

・As does Nina, who likes to ask what’s for dinner hours before dinnertime (usually an hour after eating lunch)

・You own the land, with Inej’s name not involved - you didn’t want her to feel tied down. And that she could leave whenever she desired

・Although it’s Suli culture to be travellers, Inej said she did want to be apart of the deed and you were more than happy to change it

・Inej doesn’t sleep very often; she knows when her body needs it but other than that, she really cannot get to sleep

𝐌𝐚𝐭𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐚𝐬

・Loves the feeling of a cosy home

・Has actually gone off to cry because living with you in such a lovely, warm, safe environment made him overwhelmed with happiness

・I have this feeling that you would be the type of person to rescue animals and Matthias has to put on this ‘No we barely have enough to feed ourselves, we can’t look after these animals,’ but his stance changes so quickly

・So you have about five dogs so far

・But you still go into town and feed as many as you can

・Matthias thinks he’s in charge, but after a few months together he comes to realise that you will always be in charge

・He actually really enjoys gardening

・Has those well-planned and established herb gardens. The ones that are held in perfect square timber raised beds

・Matthias absolutely threw himself into gardening. Bought books about it, spoke to the elders in town about how to perfectly grow herbs. He was both fascinated and in need on something to focus on after the tragedy he had endured

・You encouraged him, but said he had to promise not to make a mess inside.

・Is a very loud snorer, and hogs the bed, as well as the sheets. It’s just easier to sleep underneath him - not that he would notice. Once his head hits the pillow almost nothing can wake him until morning

𝐆𝐞𝐧𝐲𝐚

・Safety; that’s what she wants, that’s what she desires most

・A place that she can let her guard down and not have to worry about being used

・She doesn’t like uninvited visitors, and has special locks on all the doors so no one can break in

・When you introduced the idea of a guard dog, she was apprehensive.

  “What if it can sense ... the darkness in me?”

“There is no darkness within you, Genya.”

・So you got a Cane Corso, a beast of a dog. That scared even Genya the first time she saw her.

・Is a very light sleeper, but once getting your pup, Genya let it sleep on the end of the bed

・Even now, after your dog, Neith, has grown to full size, she still sleeps at the end of your bed (you know exactly when she jumps up and when she leaves because the bed moves...significantly)

・When days seem especially difficult for Genya, you like to leave little notes around the house, reminder her of all the things you love about her

・She likes to wake up before you and move the hair from your face and just watch you sleep

・Isn’t the best at cooking, so you usually take up that job. But she does bake pretty well. Very good at making tea cake 

・Knows a lot about healing so you have a lot of herbs, spices, flowers, vegetables that aren’t for eating per say, but for when someone is sick or wounded 

・Genya hated mirrors for a while, until you helped her get over the change in her appearance. You helped her on the road to confidence and self love. 

・You’re both still involved in helping the Grisha so you see Zoya, Nikolai, Tolya, Tamar etc 

・Genya doesn’t really like having people at the house though. It’s her sanctuary where there are no reminders of The Darkling or the nichevoya

𝐌𝐚𝐥

・Wants a simple life

・Doesn’t care for anything fancy, so you’d be the one to arrange everything

・I can see him as a farmer

・Out in the country, living off the land, but never taking too much and giving back

・We know from the books that he ends up running the orphanage with Alina, living a simple life. Looking after kids who need a home - and I think he would do that whether he was with Alina or not (and in this case...obviously not)

・He would be content with a slow life with you

・But he also wants to be of use to the community; to give back

・So you spend your days finding jobs for people who need them - with the help of Nikolai. You do the paper work while Mal meets the people and waits with them until a horse and carriage arrive

・You also have a huge vegetable garden that you allow the community to use as they please

・In thanks they give you something; knitted blanket, baked bread etc

・You have cows, goats, sheep and horses

・There are stable hands that tend to the horses. Usually the young people from the village (both boys and girls alike)

・The milk isn’t just for you and Mal but you go into town and give it to the people who need it most

・You don’t live far from the village. In fact you can see your neighbours just by looking out the window. They may look far, but really it’s only a ten minute walk

・You also teach people how to read and write

・Mal is absolutely head over heels in love with you

・Always makes sure you feel protected and safe

・Is actually very sensitive and feels things deeply. That’s why sometimes he has to take time to process his emotions alone

𝐙𝐨𝐲𝐚

・We know that Zoya is destined for greatness, hence she would end up living in a castle

・But if not a castle than a quaint chateu will do

・Is a stickler for mess

      “There is no reason for there to be so much untidyness!”

・Has a lot of pictures/drawings/paintings of her family up around your home

・She always needs the bed to be made every day; if you’re the last to get out of bed than you have to make it

・You see a different side to Zoya; yes a softer side but also the undone, sloppy version of her. She actually didn’t let you see her like that until a month into living together

・If you snore she makes you sleep on the couch

・No. pets. She’s the one who wears the pants in this relationship and her decision is final

・Until you start feeding an old cranky cat who doesn’t stray far from your home. You name him, but keep him a secret and sneak him inside when Zoya is away

・She pretends not to notice and lets you have your hidden pet

・Although you’d think there would be servant or maids, that’s not the case. You and Zoya split the chores equally; she doesn’t want another person touching her things

・She actually colour co-ordinates her clothes; they’re in colour order and when she’s especially stressed she’ll do the same for yours

・When clothes are folded, they have to be folded neatly- 

・Is a very, very good cook. She makes these pastries with goats cheese inside that are to die for 

・Has a vanity with ridiculous amounts of make up. When she has a bit to drink she always wants to give you a makeover 

・Takes her coffee and tea very strong 

     “What’s the point of polluting it with milk and sugar?”

・Is the last to fall asleep and the first to wake, but she stays in bed for 20 minutes because she likes being so close to you 

・Whenever guests come over she is the perfect hostess. But if they overstay their welcome she won’t hesitate to tell them it’s time to leave

𝐉𝐞𝐬𝐩𝐞𝐫

・IS SO DRAMATIC WHEN GETTING READY

   “This outfit worked better in my head”

・Wanted to have multiple mirrors in the bedroom so he could “see himself at all angles” but you told him “the fuck we are”

・He relented ... not without whining

・But Jesper’s clothes do end up EVERYWHERE

・He’s awful at picking up after himself in the clothing department

・But he does keep the bathroom really clean ???

・Even if it’s shaving or after a bathe, he’ll make sure it’s exactly how he found it

・Hates weird smells so he sprays perfume everywhere

・Liked the thought of living in the city to be close to the rest of the crows, so you accepted

・But you made him promise not to do anymore gambling -

・Your home is like an escape for Jesper

・Likes to go shopping with you. He likes picking out things so that you can match (you’re against it at first but ... also submit to it)\

・He always knows how to make you laugh, so whenever he forgets to do a chore he can wiggle his way out of it

・Will do all the grocery shopping and any errands you don’t want to do

・Also loves candles, especially scented ones but has been banned from having them burning unless you’re home too ...

・Moves around a lot in his sleep and has whacked you a few times

・Misses you whenever either of you are away. Keeps a piece of your clothing to smell

𝐓𝐡𝐞 𝐃𝐚𝐫𝐤𝐥𝐢𝐧𝐠

・Although he spends a lot of time at the Little Palace, he wanted a place where it was just you and him. Where he wouldn’t be disturbed by questions or problems.

・A lot of his focus is on his plans, but he keeps maps and the like all in one room

・He wants to keep the bedroom for ... bedroom activities. As well as all the other rooms for their proper uses

・Aleksander doesn’t want his ambitions to hinder your domestic life

・He hates overhead lighting

・Prefers candles or lamps

・Always buys you new clothes, new shoes, new accessories etc. Wants you to have the best of the best 

・And he gets headaches very easily so you have tinctures and remedies on hand as well as around the house

・He prefers the quiet, and too much noise overwhelms him

・Pets aren’t really his thing ... maybe a bird though, but it wouldn’t have to make much noise

・He does love horses though. And would spend hours on them if he could. Just galloping away, far from his troubles.

・Has a maid that comes and cleans the house

・The only time you’ve seen him truly peaceful is in sleep, but that’s only when the nightmares haven’t started 

・He wakes up a lot during the night and doesn’t want to wake you. But you’ve told him whenever that happens he’s more than allowed to wake you up. Being in your arms help him go back to sleep

・100% lets you steal the blankets, without ever complaining 

・He’s more likely to remember things than you are, so he makes/buys you a calender and writes down everything you’d need to remember 

𝐍𝐢𝐧𝐚

・Isn’t very tidy. There are a LOT of food crumbs (especially in the bed)

・Her hair is actually very long, she just keeps it up and out of the way, so you get to see Nina with her long hair down

・But you also find a lot of Nina’s hair ... everywhere

・She does like when you give her head scratches - a lot of golden retriever energy

・You’ve actually been collecting it to prove to her how much she sheds

・Is always hungry and asks if you want to get food nearly every hour and a half

・She’s not that bad of a cook, but you aren’t much better. So a lot of your food is bought rather than made

・Always makes sure you’ve had something to eat though, especially after a long day or after a big gig with the crows 

・You, Nina, and Inej have a close friendship; so Inej likes to ... appear ... in your house

・Most of the time it’s because of an injury. So you keep your storages stocked up just in case.

・But other times it’s for a sleep over! Eating, all sleeping in the loungeroom, telling each other stories and secrets

・You invite Jesper and Wylan aswell... and have asked Kaz but he always declines. Well actually he doesn’t even decline he just doesn’t say anything or show up 

・Is a heavy sleeper when you’re in the house. But when she’s alone she can barely sleep

・Always kisses you when you walk through the door and before you leave. It’s become a ritual and if it isn’t done then it’s bad luck

・Learns your little quirks. Like if you like your sandwiches cut diagonally or straight 

・Nina is very romantic

・She loves going on little dates with you. And always makes sure you have time for a date. At least once a month. Even if it’s just going out to eat and then taking a walk underneath the night sky

[ryleektv]

Lorenzo Berkshire Headcannons

Part 3

warnings: language, mean enzo (per usual tbh), some NSFW (i'll put a divider before it), manipulation to the max

can you tell he's my favorite yet?? 😭

WC: 660

• runs. gets up ungodly early on completely random days to go running in the mornings and brag about how healthy and fit he is all day

• like there is no schedule to it, he just gets that 3am urge to get his shit together and decides to go running the next morning

• actually good at it though (i run and trust it is not easy 💪😔) and takes long as showers afterwards because bud cannot stand the feeling of being sweaty 

• if he is dating you and actually likes you, like straight up in love with you (i fear this is next to impossible but we going with it) you will get the best treatment of your life, you will not ever be in a better relationship

• you're getting genuine royalty treatment, gifts, constant love and affection, the whole nine yards

• but if bro doesnt actually completely like you, you're getting love bombed to another astronomical level

• down bad - taylor swift. its him.

• will embed himself in every single part of your life simply to know that when he eventually breaks up with you (or becomes bad enough to force you into breaking up with him.. that way you take the blame) you will not be able to do anything without thinking of him

• i've seen a few people talk about that and i fully stand by it

• walking to hogsmeade? lorenzo's bought you your favorite things from every one of these stores. 

• eating dinner?? lorenzo personally molded your food taste to match his so now you cannot eat your new favorite foods without it being all about that first time he made you try a bite of his. 

• trying to sleep in your own bed in your own room?? dont you dare forget all those times lorenzo snuck in just to lie next to you until you fell asleep, talking about the bullshit future he convinced you would happen.

• you dare have sex with another man?? lorenzo did it- you- better and you both know it. 

• watching your favorite movie? he claimed it was his favorite too after you two watched it together and then proceeded to watch it specifically with you about a million times after

• simply trying to hang out with your own pet?? too bad it liked lorenzo better (bro even has the poor cat love bombed) 

• "you used a fork once... turns out forks are fucking everywhere" type shit

• in conclusion, you will barely survive the breakup and he's planned it all out 

• also knows damn well you'll probably come running back because he made all these moments with your favorite things good memories, so now you're constantly associated with these good memories of him that he made to wash out the bad moments that way you'd be more likely to forgive, forget, and come crawling back after a few weeks (at the most) 

18+, MDNI

• firm believer in the fact that he's a switch but you wont know that unless you're in a committed relationship with him (or you get him drunk enough tbh because as i've said before, buddy gets drunk and overshares like crazy) 

• otherwise everyone just thinks he's dom because no way in hell is he subbing for some one night stand 

• you get him all wrapped around your finger and actually manage to fix him up enough to date him for real though, bro is a MESS

• sex drive is through the ROOF

• it's almost abnormal. none of his friends are getting busy THAT often 

• does not give half a shit though

• king of foreplay that ends up borderline better than the actual sex 

• man is a master with his fingers but also the biggest munch known to man?? heavenly combination. 

• not an asshole when it comes down to this type of thing though and will make sure his partner is satisfied. 

• wont sit there rubbing the inside of your thigh for a half hour thinking he's doing something!!!!! what a relief!!!! 

pls feel free to send in any requests because i need some ideas and i really feel like writing something