#i know you���re all on that terrible clock app too

[twistedmusings]

A/N: Planning to post some finished requests tonight thankfully but I wanted to share something super self indulgent with you guys since I just recently got an Alexa! I'm still kind of in a funk (since classes are STILL not over with) so thank you everyone for your kind words in my inbox q wq For now I only have Riddle and Leona...but if everyone likes it I'll make an effort to finish! I kinda am working on Azul's as we speak >:3 Warnings: Boys missing you terribly, Riddle justifying the breaking of rules and Leona realizing that he is talking to an inanimate object.

The Ramshackle Prefect leaves to go to RSA for a month, following a lead that could get them back home. And while the dorm leaders do miss them terribly, it seems one of them is hiding something.

. .

“AZUL-SHI DO SOMETHING.”

The Octavinelle dorm leader barely listened to his friend's request as he also crowded over Idia’s phone, the other five dorm leaders looking down at the screen as a pair of familiar eyes stared back at them.

“Where is Idia? Can you please hand me back to him?”

Riddle blinked at the sprite on the screen before looking back at Idia with a frown.

“Explain yourself, Shroud.”

Idia whimpered as he hung his head low in shame.

“[Y/N]-san...I mean...the Prefect left to go to RSA for a whole month, right? Crowley said it was to help them find a way back home but apparently there was some trouble there too and...and he brought them to fix it...”

Malleus’s neutral expression changes into something a bit sadder while Kalim lets out what everybody was thinking.

“To take them away so suddenly...I didn’t even get a chance to give them a goodbye party!”

“They’re only away for a month, Kalim.” Vil’s eyes stay on Idia’s phone screen.

“But I’m sure a party would have let them know how much I would miss them!”

Riddle clears his throat, “That still doesn’t explain anything about what I am seeing. Why in the world do you have something that looks like...that looks so much like them on your phone!”

Idia was sure this was hell. Of all the people to catch him using his phone during a dorm leader meeting, why did it have to be Riddle? What was he even supposed to answer to that question! That he missed talking to [Y/N]-san about the new animes that were releasing this week that he had purposefully made an AI from data Ortho had collected on them and their mannerisms?

He would rather die!

“I--I was testing a new AI! Just...for schedules and stuff like that! And I didn’t have anything else to base it on so I just took [Y/N]-san’s information and made a prototype! It’s not just going to go out to the public like that! They can customize it however they like--!”

Azul hums as he taps the screen, the sprite giggling as he touches their cheek before looking up at all of them expectantly.

“...A prototype, huh.” he smiles and leans back while taking his phone out, “Everybody stop crowding around him, we might as well be breaking his arm slowly at this point.”

The rest of the dorm leader's move back with only some protest, Idia’s eyes shining as he looks up at his other friend.

“Azul-shi…”

The dorm leader of Octavinelle grins, “If it’s a prototype then that means it needs users, correct? More people to test it out?”

“Eh?”

Azul puts his phone in front of Idia and smiles at him like he was just about to close a rather important business transaction.

“Well then I want the prototype as well. Download it to my phone, will you?”

“Eh?!”

Idia presses his phone to his chest as if Azul was about to take it, looking around nervously as the other dorm leaders take their phones out and set it in front of him.

“If it’s an application for scheduling then I could use it to keep Heartslabyul’s matters in check. I’ll take one too.”

“Ruggie is gonna be busy during exams...this thing better work as an alarm.”

“Surely this would help me keep track of my schedule for both the Monstro Lounge and school. I’ll take one with a statistics program built in, Idia”

“Oh!! I want mine to be able to sing! And can I also get them in Scarabia’s dorm uniform? I want to see what [Y/N]-san would look like!’

“I’ll take that as well. I also want a photo re-touch feature as well as one hour updates as to what is going on in my Magicam account.”

Each phone was placed in front of him as Idia felt his head start to spin. He just wanted to keep this thing a secret only for himself! He wasn’t even planning to release it, it was all just a lie so they wouldn’t know his greatest shame!

A shadow was casted over him, Idia looking up slowly as Malleus smiled and placed his phone down.

“I am eager to see your finished product, Shroud.”

The tarts in front of him looked absolutely delicious.

Trey had really outdone himself this time. The strawberries were cut into perfectly neat shapes and the glaze over them made them so mouth wateringly shiny that he could practically taste the sweet treat without even having to taste it!

Which only made his want of one grow even more.

“And here comes the next batch.” Trey smiles as he puts down another plate in front of him, Riddle’s eyes now staring at that plate while his vice dorm leader cleans himself up.

“When did you say the Unbirthday party was going to be today?”

“A-At three o’clock sharp.”

Trey nods as he looks at the clock in the kitchen.

“Perfect. I promised to meet Jade to get some herbs he has been growing as well as letting him teach me how to make this one soup they had in the Monstro Lounge about a week ago.”

He grabs his phone and heads out, leaving Riddle with a quick goodbye and a promise that he would make it back as quick as possible.

Leaving him all alone with two plates filled with his favourite treat.

The dorm leader looks around once...then twice...checking if anybody was coming into the kitchen before going back to stare at the plates.

It wasn’t like he was going to grab one

The Unbirthday party today would be using pastries that Trey had made yesterday. It was the third of the month so the rules required a completely different pastry. The strawberry tarts were most likely for tomorrow.

So Riddle could wait. He was the Heartslabyul dorm leader after all so not only could he wait but he was required to wait! As the dorm leader he was to set an example and he couldn’t let himself be seduced so easily by just two plates of such yummy looking tarts--!

He quickly takes his phone out and looks down at the screen, face flushing as he tries to remember how Idia told him to open up the new app.

“[Y/N]-san…?”

A face peeks out from the corner of his phone, smiling as it recognizes his face and steps out while giving him a polite bow.

“Good morning, Riddle-san! What can I help you with?”

He can’t help a small rush of excitement at seeing the Prefect’s face after not seeing them for two weeks. Riddle would make an effort to stop and talk to them whenever they made their way to Heartslabyul that not seeing them for so long had almost thrown him off his schedule.

And...he missed the conversations he had with them.

As the dorm leader and a student in NRC he didn’t necessarily have time to go to any other events or take part in any of the shenanigans others would get up to, not that he necessarily wanted to, but it was entertaining when the Prefect talked about it with him.

It felt like they were letting him into their world.

So maybe this substitute would suffice...it was a scheduling app after all so it wasn’t like he was using it for pleasure only.

“Would you please repeat rule 56 of the Queen’s handbook?”

The AI clears their throat as a book animation appears before them.

“Rule number 56: On the third of April, black tea should be served along with pineapple tarts. Followed by a game of cards in which the loser must pour the Queen tea for the rest of the Unbirthday party.”

Riddle sighs as he looks back at the plate of tarts.

“...I guess I’ll wait until tomorrow…”

“Wait until what?”

He looks down at the AI, the sprite blinking in confusion as it waits for an answer. Idia had mentioned adding a conversational feature…

“There is no rule about what to eat tomorrow so I decided that we would have strawberry tarts.”

“Are those your favourite?”

Riddle nods and steps out of the kitchen, making his way to his room as he stared back at the open door.

“They are. Ever since I was little. I couldn’t have many because of--”

He decides to not go deep into the subject.

“I’m sure Trey’s pineapple tarts will be excellent. I will just have to wait until tomorrow to enjoy the strawberry ones.”

The AI hums before the book animation pops up again, looking down and flipping a couple of pages before speaking up.

“Riddle-san. While it does say that black tea should be served with pineapple tarts...it does state that it should be done for the Unbirthday party and the Unbirthday party only.”

He frowns, “Your point?”

“I am sure no rule would be broken if only the Queen has a tea party before the Unbirthday party. From what I am seeing here--”

They flip a couple more pages.

“There is no rule about a tea party of one enjoying a strawberry tart.”

Riddle blinks before looking down at his phone, the sprite smiling as they shut the small book and lets it disappear with a ‘poof.’

No rule would be broken...if it was only a tea part of one?

He looks down at the AI when he hears them giggle.

“Riddle-san looks really happy.”

A blush covers his face at being called out on how big his smile probably was.

“Did I help in any way?”

The dorm leader takes a deep breath before smiling as he looks down at the phone and presses his fingertip on top of their head, rubbing it back and forth as if they were petting them. Something he knew he could never really do with them in real life lest he was looking to get odd looks.

“More than enough. Would you like to accompany me during this tea party?”

“Yes please!”

Riddle nods before looking around once more and clearing his throat.

“And...would you refer to me as ‘dorm leader’ from now on?”

The sprite nods as they give him a polite bow.

“Yes, dorm leader!”

He would need to send his report of the app as quickly as possible, Idia had really outdone himself this time...maybe he could ask if he could get them dressed up in the Heartslabyul uniform?

Riddle still wished you would hurry back.

“Leona-san! Please wake up!”

The blankets on the bed wriggled a bit as the phone was tousled over from one side of the bed to the other, the sprite inside frowning as they tried again.

“Leona-san! Please wake up! Ruggie-san texted you!”

A hand comes out of the blankets before holding the phone up.

“Read the text out loud then.”

Sighing, the AI pulls the text up and reads out loud.

“Please be awake by the time I get there, Leona. I need to make sure I get your signature on these papers for the dorm budget. If you don’t I’ll hold your lunch captive!”

Leona’s face finally pops up from under the blanket, the man sitting up and running a hand through his hair as he speaks up again.

‘Oi. What time is it?”

“It is 3:14 in the afternoon, Leona-san.”

“And when did Ruggie send the text?”

“At 3:00 o'clock.”

He groans and lays back down, the pillows flying about as he holds the phone to his face and smiling when he sees the sprite looking down at him worriedly.

“You really do look like them…” Leona whispers before tapping the screen so that he is poking the sprite’s cheek, “What is that face for?”

“I’m just worried for you, Leona-san. Too much sleep is a symptom of some sicknesses so--”

“Hah? You think I would get sick so easily?” he yawns and stretches, “I’m different from humans. Beastmen need a lot more sleep than regular humans do so...I’m just doing what my body tells me.”

Green eyes watch a notepad appear before the AI as they write down the information, smiling as they close it up and watch it disappear.

“I’ll keep that information in mind so I can serve Leona-san better. Thank you so much.”

Leona blinks at the words before a lazy smile crosses his face.

“Serve me better, huh? Never thought I would hear you say that.”

Usually the herbivore would be frowning and telling him to get up and actually take charge of his dorm and how he didn’t act like any grown up they knew. The sprite, however, tilts their head in confusion before speaking up once again.

“I am yours, after all.”

“Damn right you are.”

He looked at the phone a bit more, the sprite smiling up at him as he poked their cheek or patted their head. A part of him wondered if you would react like that with him as well. You always seemed so annoyed with his antics yet you never failed to come back to talk to him, telling him how he needs to get his act together if he is ever planning to go back to the Afterglow.

Leona would bet money that if he patted your head out of nowhere you would be highly flustered. Getting praise from him was something that didn’t happen often, after all.

“What day is it?”

“The 12th day of April, Leona-san.”

Another two weeks of you being gone. He frowns and closes his eyes as he thinks about you meeting those other students. RSA was just full of idiots...like his brother--

“Dammit.”

He slams the phone down but blinks when he hears a small yelp, turning the phone back around to find the AI looking rather frazzled with their eyes closed and hair all over the place.

“Shit. Are you....okay?”

Great, he was asking an application if it was okay. He could understand why Idia would hide this, right now he felt like he was crazy.

“Y--Yes! It was just unexpected!”

The sprite fixed itself up quickly and smiled back at Leona.

“Are you okay though, Leona-san?”

The dorm leader chuckled and nodded as they set the phone down gently and laid down next to it. At least that part was very much like you, worrying about others before focusing on yourself.

“You’re not going to complain? I almost just threw you.”

Without missing a beat, the AI stands up and looks at him.

“Leona-san is still working hard despite his body telling him to sleep. My program tells me that it would be a natural emotion to feel frustrated if you are not allowed to do something you want. Normal actions of frustration speak of physical manifestations such as kicking, punching or throwing. I was simply calculating it for it to be the latter and for it to happen towards a pillow. I’ll make sure to fix my calculations next time.”

He shakes his head and sets the phone down gently.

“Weird thing. You shouldn’t forgive someone so easily after they wronged you.”

“But you didn’t wrong me, Leona-san. I didn’t feel any pain. I just want to make sure you are feeling your best! You are my number one priority!”

This machine is going to make him go insane, he knows you would never say that but the fact that Idia had gotten your voice down so well that it was almost as if you had just told him he was your number one---

He was already getting a headache.

“Set an alarm for an hour. Ruggie will take around that long anyway.” Leona lays down and wraps the blankets around him.

“Of course. Alarm set for one hour. Would you like to be woken up with a personalized message?”

Leona hummed before grinning.

“Wake me up by calling me ‘King’.”

The sprite fixes its settings before giving a polite bow.

“Yes, my King. Please enjoy your rest.”

After this he would send his report to Shroud and maybe ask for an outfit upgrade. He only needed to show him some Afterglow clothes and the nerd would probably be able to make the AI wear them, right?

Whatever, the moment you came back Leona would make sure that you gave him some headpats for making him wait so long.

[leah-bobeea]

Magazine Girl; Steve Rogers

You ever start writing a fic about a journalist reader at two am who’s eventually gonna end up doing steeb, over his desk, biting down on his expensive leather belt?

❀ ❀ ❀

Warnings: CEO!Steve x Journalist!Reader, Angst, Steve’s a little mean, Bossy Steve, Shy/Anxious reader, Dom!steve, mentions spanking, oral (m receiving), unprotected sex, coercion (a little teensy bit), Bad writing lol

Word Count: 3.9k

A/N: Terrible writing w/ a terribly rushed ending. Written on my phone, in my notes app, not beta read, and barely proofread.

❀ ❀ ❀

Yes, your hands were busy. Not busy typing out a rough draft of this stupid article on Steve Rogers, not busy calling his secretary to set up a meeting with the man, or the closest to him you could get, not busy doing their job at all. They were busy tapping your pen against the glass tabletop of your desk, successfully annoying Wanda, who sent you an aggravated look from across the room.

“Seriously, Y/n?” Wanda moved from where she was at her desk, clearly not making a breakthrough on her article for this month's issue either. You could only shake your head in reply. Throwing your head back to stare at the ceiling, you starting explaining. “Maria gave me this huge article, Wanda. Cover! And, trust me, I know she’s testing me and doesn’t think I’ll actually be able to do it so she can fire me, or belittle me, or- or something! I don’t know what to do, help me, bestie.” As you finished rambling you looked up at her with your best puppy dog eyes, hoping for some of that amazing advice she gives.

Wanda laughed and pulled a chair over from an empty desk, sitting down and haphazardly throwing her feet on top of your cluttered tabletop. “She wouldn’t give you an article you couldn’t handle, she loves you, Y/n. If it’s truly as difficult as you’re making it out as that means that she knows you’re ready for it, and you’ll do amazing. Who’s it on anyway?”

She was doing such a good job at easing your nerves until she brought up the topic. You whined high in your throat and threw your head to the side before uttering, “Steven Rogers,” you turned your body back to Wanda, “What more do I need to say?” Her eyes widened just a little. “Sheesh...I’d start making phone calls, and praying, maybe?”

❀ ❀ ❀

“Hello, Miss. Carter, um- this is Y/n L/n with Shield Mag-“ “Please hold, dear.”

You pulled the phone away from your head and let it rest on your naked thigh, quickly pressing the speaker button. It was times like this when you were grateful that you let your grandma convince you to buy a house phone. Peggy Carter was the fifth person you’d contacted trying to get an interview with this man and she was the second lady that humored you enough to at least pretend like she’d get back to you.

She’s his main assistant so you might have better luck this time...

Thirty minutes later you had your head inches off the ground and your toes wiggling in the air. Humming the annoying hold music to yourself, you braided, unbraided, and re-braided a single strand of your hair. At thirty-nine minutes you were ready to give up until you heard a click on the other line.

You scrambled to turn off the speaker and press the phone back to your ear.

“Miss. Carter I was hoping to set up an interview with Mr. Rogers, over the phone, in person, or through email, if that’s possible?” You asked, hopeful that she wouldn’t shoot you down immediately like everyone else.

“Well, Magazine Girl, I only do in person. But I am a very busy man, so I need to know right away, what’s in it for me?” Your breath hitched and you almost fell and cracked your head open from how startled hearing his voice made you. Then, you nearly gave yourself a head rush from how fast you sat up.

“Well, um, Sir, you would get a headlining article, and uh, a cover on the June issue of Shield Magazine. That’s um, that’s if you want a cover- you don’t have to be on the cover if you don’t want to, just the interview would be mentioned on the cover, but-“ His chuckle was gritty and vivid, effective in stopping your babble. “I’ll see you Friday around noon. Goodbye Magazine Girl.” He hung up on you before you could even comprehend anything but that captivating laugh.

You rubbed at your eyes and grabbed your planner and pen. “Friday at noon...”

❀ ❀ ❀

The next day you were back in the office, sitting in Wanda’s stiff chair with twin caramel lattes sitting in front of you. That was the thing about you, you’d come to work early bearing gifts just to tell your closest friend your good news. You’re sweet like that.

When Wanda arrived it was fifteen minutes later and your latte was halfway gone. Hearing her black stilettos click on the glossy linoleum made you perk up immediately. As she approached, you stood, handing her the latte and wrapping your arms around her lithe body.

“I got an interview!” You squealed, rocking your bodies side to side. She stilled you and smiled. “Gosh, that’s great, Y/n. How’d you get it?”

“Well, I called, like everyone, and he picked up, Wanda! he picked up! I’m scheduled for Friday, and my Lord, Wanda, his laugh, it's like honey...” You trailed off, sighing at the thought of him. Your head was rested on her shoulder, a faint smile on your face. “You’ve got a crush on him!” Wanda exclaimed, grabbing your shoulders and holding you an arm's length away to get a good look at your bashful face.

You gasped, “No I do not! That would be totally unprofessional!” The cackle that erupted from her made her sound like the wicked witch of the west. And honestly, under her stare, you felt like Dorothy stuck under that house.

When Wanda was finally done laughing maliciously she let you go, plopping down in her desk chair and sipping her latte. She pointed over and your desk and gave you a look. “Better start drafting those questions... we wouldn’t want you to blank on your crush.” “Wanda!”

❀ ❀ ❀

The days leading up to Friday were excruciatingly long, yet the hours until twelve flew past all too quickly.

It seemed as if your wardrobe was never ending, full of clothes that you deemed inappropriate for a meeting with the CEO of American Enterprises. You threw yourself back onto the bed, hair and makeup done but body still wrapped in a fluffy white towel. “Oh Milky, what am I gonna wear?” The soft white kitty glared at you from the pillow she was perched on, meowing at you aggressively.

Ten thirty blinked on the clock and you sat up, glancing at all of the clothes that were scattered on the floor. “I guess this will do.” You picked up the same emerald blazer you had chosen originally and layered it over some basic Levi’s, and gray low cut blouse flowing over your form. A belt was necessary, so you grazed over your options. Brown wouldn’t go, even though it was your only fancy belt. The only black one you had was old, the leather cracked and worn, but it had to do. You slipped on some pretty black heels, lucky that you painted your toes a similar color to your blouse. After accessorizing you sprayed your signature perfume, the one that got you your first college-aged boyfriend, and the same one that you were wearing when you got your first real job.

By the time you were on the Metro, it was eleven o’ six, and you were worried. If you were late you’d lose this chance, and probably your job. The car stopped around eleven fifteen, giving you fifteen minutes to make your way to the building, check-in, and try to not seem so nervous.

Finding the building wasn’t difficult at all, after all, it is the second biggest building in New York City, competing with Stark Tower. The “A” at the top wasn’t illuminated, but it still stood out against the other buildings, cowering over them.

You found that the doors were heavy and if you denied Wanda of going to those burn boot camps you would have extreme difficulty prying them open. The inside was classy, just as you expected. The lamps had blue shades and the front desk lit up with a design that resembled the American Flag, but with less curved stripes and only one large star.

The receptionist was one of the women who shot you down immediately when you called and was a little surprised when you checked in. “Hello, I’m here for Mr. Rogers, twelve o’clock?” She searched for something on her computer, clearly trying to see if the appointment was legitimate. When you were proven correct, she handed you a temporary security badge and a sharpie to write your name on it. “Have a seat over there when you’re finished. I’ll call for you when Mr. Rogers is ready for you.” She smiled, it was fake, but it helped you feel more comfortable.

The red couch was stiff and small, clearly not meant for long periods of sitting. The badge was clipped onto your blouse, not your blazer, and the weight of it was pulling at the already low cut neckline. You thought about moving it, but your attention was quickly turned to the coffee table, where your magazine sat, opened to an article you wrote. Your hands were a little shaky as you went to close the magazine, but you were interrupted before you could grasp the bent pages.

“Miss. Y/n? Mr. Rogers is ready for your interview. Head up to floor thirty six, the door on the right.” Miss receptionist sounded bored, her eyes never left the monitor in front of her. “Thanks.”

Some of the others in the waiting area looked up to you after hearing where you were going, causing you to blush.

You felt lucky to get the elevator to yourself. Thirty-six floors is a long way to go, yet you got there in under three. In the elevator you adjusted your outfit and flattened your hair, hoping it wasn’t frizzy.

The door on the right was clearly not just a meeting room but an office, which you thought was odd. You also found it odd that no one was in the room, you expected to at least be met with his assistant or secretary, if not Steve himself.

Your eyes scanned the room to make sure it was completely empty before taking a seat on the leather chair on the opposite side of the big desk. You opened your notebook and got out your lucky rooster pen before going over your questions once again, hoping he didn’t think they were stupid.

You waited fifteen minutes for him, growing increasingly irked as the minutes built up. When he walked through the door you felt like your heart stopped.

Six-four build covered in a black suit and tie, white undershirt pristine. Blonde hair disheveled and a perfectly manicured beard. The door slammed shut and you heard the clinking sound of a glass being set down. Steve lifted his head and you snapped yours to the front, hoping he didn’t catch you checking him out.

The room was silent besides a rustling coming from behind you. You busied yourself with your notebook, highlighting the questions you wanted to ask most.

“You’re a very patient girl.” He observed. Steve made you wait on purpose. He knew from the first person you called that you wanted an interview, he was friends with Maria Hill after all. But he wanted some entertainment, and after looking into you, he knew you were the right girl. So far he’s made you wait an hour and fourteen minutes for just a smidge of his attention.

“Yes, Sir.” You mumbled, accidentally stopping the highlighter too soon, pressing it down, and letting the pink ink bleed to the next page. He hummed in approval as he rounded the corner, drink in his hand, coat jacket discarded, sleeves rolled up, first couple buttons loose. Finally, Steve sat in the big chair, keeping eye contact with you as he leaned forward, resting his elbows on the mahogany table.

“Give me that.” Your eyebrows furrowed at his statement, “What?” You asked, putting your pen down on your lap. Steve motioned for your notebook, and you opened your mouth, starting to stumble over your words. “Oh? um- Okay?” You handed it over to him and he relaxed back into his chair. A question bubbled in your throat, but you didn’t let it escape. Instead, you watched as his eyes scanned the papers, blue cursive, and pink highlighter, little stars and flowers drawn in the corners. “Mr. Rogers, are you ready to start the interview?” You tapped your watch, twelve twenty four.

He nodded, “Yes, I’m ready.” You cleared your throat and went to ask for your notebook, but he beat you to it. “Miss. L/n, is there an achievement or something that you’ve contributed to me that you are most proud of?” Why was he asking you your own questions? “Sir, I-“ He cut you off once again. “Answer the question, doll.”

You huffed and crossed your arms over your chest. “I- um, no. I haven’t contributed anything to you that I should be proud of, Sir.”

“Is there a particular moment or memory of building this relationship that stands out to you?” He continued with the questions, tilting his head to the side. Why was he twisting the questions onto you? When you didn’t come up with an answer he chuckled, sounding sickly sweet like molasses dripping straight from the sugarcane. “Patience finally wearing thin, honey?” You nodded eyes staring at his chest, you couldn’t quite muster up the courage to look him in the eye.

He snapped your notebook closed and slid it towards your side of the grand desk. “You couldn’t answer my questions correctly, Y/n.” You nodded, eyes now downcast, admiring the pattern on the blue carpet. You felt like you were going to cry. This big scary man was mean and just wouldn’t let you conduct your interview and you didn’t know why. “I’m sorry, Sir.”

“I know you are, doll. But, if you can’t answer my questions how can I answer yours? You have nothing to offer me.” This was it, you were losing your chance. “Business wise, that is.” Your head shook, and your hands were clasped together, your left thumb rubbing your right nail back and forth. “I don’t understand, Sir.”

“I’m friends with Maria, Y/n. If you’re able to get this article done and get me on the cover you’re gonna get a promotion, you want that, right doll?” Your eyes went wide, “Yes, Sir.” Now, he stood, coming around to the front where you are and leaning against the desk. “She said to make it difficult, but I don’t care enough to do all that. So, doll, I’ll answer your questions. They’re quite good actually. And I’ll do a little photoshoot for the cover, but you’ll need to pay me back.” You gulped, hands suddenly sweaty, you felt like a little chihuahua, trembling under his gaze.

“How? Um, how do I pay you?” Gosh, even your voice was shaky. “Stand up. Lose the blazer.” Steve commanded, slowly unbuckling his belt. You could faintly tell from the buckle that it was Hermès. You stood and took off your blazer in a rush, folding it poorly and setting it on the arm of the chair. “Atta girl.”

He placed his hands on your shoulders and then ran them down to your hands, giving them a little squeeze before he hooked his index fingers into your belt loops, pulling you closer. So close that the tips of your shoes were touching. He leaned down to kiss your neck and you stiffened, but when he grazed his teeth over the bruised spot he just created you melted into him, your hands grasping at the pristine white button up, letting out a little whimper.

Steve pushed you back a little and took in your form, then he pulled the little security badge off, tossing it to the side. Like a little kid, he pulled at the neckline of your shirt. “Off.” You would’ve giggled at him if he didn’t look so scary right now. His blue eyes were piercing into yours, left hand so tight on your hip you thought he might leave bruises.

By the time your shirt hit the floor, he was pushing at your shoulders, hinting at you to go to your knees. “Sir, I don’t know-“

You started, knees hitting the carpet underneath you. He shushed you and guided your head to look up at him. “It's okay, baby, you don’t have to know how. I’ll do all the work, doll. Now, undo your bra.” As expected you did as he asked immediately, fumbling with the clasp until it fell down your arms. It ended up next to your thigh as you watched him pull his belt through the loops.

Steve walked around you and kneeled down, belt in his hands. “Put your hands behind your back.” You nodded immediately, so submissive, completely at his mercy. “Yes, Sir.” Steve loved how polite you were. He made quick work of restraining you, tying your hands to rest against your jean clad ass. The metal felt harsh against your skin and the soft, expensive leather snaked up your arms.

When he was back in front of you he sighed and shook his head. “I should’ve had you unzip me first.” Hearing Steve say that finally brought you to the reality of what was about to happen. You watched with big eyes as he undid the button and then the zipper, the sound making you tremble. His dress pants puddled on the floor and you were in awe as he massaged his bulge through his boxers. Slowly, he pulled them down to the middle of his thighs. His cock bounced up to hit his abdomen and he hissed as he stroked it a few times. “Open as wide as you can, honey.”

As always, you did as asked. Your tongue stuck out a little, wetting your bottom lip. He grasped the back of your head and leaned you forward a little, then you felt his blunt tip on your tongue. You gagged and spluttered when Steve was about halfway seated, he pulled out and leaned down, kissing you sloppily. “Breathe through your nose, baby. Don’t forget.” Then he was back at slowly entering your throat. “Fuck...” he grunted, finally fully seated in your throat, your nose pressed against his nicely groomed pubic hair. He caressed your throat then, rubbing the bulge in your throat, resisting the urge to press down and have you choke on his cock even more. “So good, Y/n.”

Steve started rocking into your throat, slowly fucking it as spit leaked from the corners of your mouth. After minutes of abusing your throat, he finally pulled out, adoring the way tears ran down your cheeks and how you hiccupped, wanting to desperately rub at your raw throat to soothe it. Your hands pulled at the belt and your eyes begged Steve to undo it. “Up, doll.”

He hoisted you up from your armpits and bent you over the desk. Steve pressed kisses down your back and reached in front of you, unbuckling your belt and throwing it somewhere to the left of you, then he unbuttoned and unzipped your pants, tugging them down with fervor.

Steve undid your restraints and left more kisses down your back until he reached your ass, spreading your cheeks to reveal your tight hole and glistening cunt. “I’d love to see this ass all bruised and red, but I’ll have to save that for another day.” His index and middle finger ran circles on your clit, your back arching to press into him more. “Sir, please!” You gasped, your hand flying out to the edge of the table and nearly knocking over the glass of whiskey he left on a coaster when Steve finally pushed two fingers into your aching hole.

“Gotta open you up first, doll, get you all sloppy and ready for my cock.” You cried out as he hooked his fingers, rubbing the magic spot inside of you. “Please, Steve, please.” He cooed at you, pulling his fingers out, and instead traced his name over your clit. “You gonna come, baby? Huh? You gonna drench my fingers, little girl?” You were moaning in wanton, hips humping his hand desperately. He brought his other hand down and started fingerfucking you again, giving you just enough to push you over the edge.

Your moans were breathy, your legs twitching, and you were panting by the time your orgasm faded. “I hope you know I’m not done with you yet, doll, I still haven’t come inside you.” That made you whine high in your throat and you tried, to no avail, to slam your legs shut around his hand.

Steve’s right hand fisted his cock a few times, making sure he’s rock hard and dripping with pre-cum, while his left kept your lips spread, showing him your gorgeous pussy. The blunt head at your entrance shocked you, and you yelped at the intrusion. “Sir!”

He leaned his head down and spit where you were joined, trying to make the glide even easier. “Shut up, doll.” He snapped after you cried out. Once he was as deep as possible inside of you he reached for his belt, looping it over as if he was going to spank you, and stuffed it into your mouth. “Bite down,” Steve demanded, a hand snaked around to the front of your neck where he was applying light pressure.

When you tried to push back against him he held your hips down against the wood steadily and started snapping his hips at a fast speed. Each thrust pushed you down onto the table, letting your clit rub against the mahogany wood.

Your vision felt spacey like you could black out any moment as he choked you. Your orgasm washed over you and you had to use all the strength you had in you to keep biting down on the belt. You didn’t want to know what would happen if you disobeyed his and let it go. Steve’s hips harshly snapped against your ass a few more times before he stilled inside of you, filling you with his spunk.

Before Steve cleaned you up and let you leave his office he had to finger his cum back inside of you, making sure none of it went to waste. Then, he made sure you had a way home, and a way to contact him, because, “Now you’re no longer Magazine Girl, but My Girl.”

@lo-bells

[teddy06writes]

the quackity + karl irl stream but add y/n ✨ (and maybe sapnap if that's not too hard to write 😳😳)

quackity x karl x reader (I tried to Fit in Sapnap but it didn’t work with the way the meet up actually went)

trigger warnings: swearing

premise: you finally get to meet your long distance boyfriends in person, the stream that follows is WACK

(y/s/n) - your screen name

(y/n/n) - your nickname

“Blep” talking

‘blep’ texting

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

“WE’RE POPPING OFF! WE’RE POPPIN OFF!”

You roared with laughter, doing your best to stay out of the way as Alex and Karl started swinging guitars around.

~~

two and a half hours earlier:

You had gotten off the plane in NC, practically buzzing with nervous energy, or maybe it was the coffee you’d gotten on the plane, combined with the two energy drinks earlier in the day, but hey! it was a long flight, and it was already late.

It was nearly 10:30 by the time you got your bag, and pulled out your phone to check the new messages from Karl and Alex.

You had all planed to meet up originally at Karl’s house but then plans had changed when you and Alex figured it’d be cheaper to uber together, even if it ruined the plan of all of you meeting at once.

‘I just got my bag where are you?’ you texted Alex.

‘I only just got off the plane, I should get down to baggage claim soon tho’

You smiled, ‘I’ll see you them <3′

‘nerd’         ‘<3′

You stood against a wall, quietly scrolling through twitter as you waited, until a new message from Alex popped up.

It was a fairly blurry photo of a crowded airport, with a red circle drawn around one person.

‘that is you right?’

You chuckled, zooming in on the picture to determine that is was indeed you, ‘yup, that’s little ole me... stalker’

You looked up as you sent the text, rising on your toes to look over the crowd, trying to spot him, pulling out your camera you quietly explained what was going on and then:

“(Y/n)!” Alex emerged from the crowd, and immediately you grinned, throwing your arms around him.

“Alex!”

You pulled away long enough for Alex to ask, “Can I kiss you?”

Laughing you nodded, and his lips met yours, as your hands came to rest on the sides of his face.

When you pulled away Alex muttered, “wow.”

“That bad? Sorry.” You glanced down sheepishly.

“Not that-” he said quickly, taking a half step back, “It’s just- wow, you know. Like, we’re actually here together, and about to go meet up with Karl, and wow.”

You chuckled, “I guess that makes sense.”

He garbed your hand, “C’mon, I already called an uber.”

~~

The whole way to Karl’s you sat nervously fiddling the cuffs of your hoodie, occasionally glancing at Alex, who smiled back reassuringly.

You sent a message to the group chat the three of you were in saying you would be there in two minutes at which he sent back a long string of emojis you could only take to mean that he was excited.

The car pulled up in front of the house and you got out, thanking the driver as Alex got your suitcases from the back.

Quietly you pulled out your camera, just as you had at the airport.

“Why are you filming everything?” Alex asked as you walked up to the house.

“We’re gonna do what George could never.” You laughed.

“Yeah but the lightings gonna be shit, it’s dark out here.”

“It’ll still be better than George!”

Alex laughed, high fiving you, “True!”

Almost as soon as you knocked, the door opened and Karl came barreling out, tackling both of you in a hug, “YOUR HERE!”

Alex barley kept him from falling over, “Yeah!”

“It’s almost like we planned it.” You couldn’t help but scoff at the camera.

Karl grinned, quickly pecking at your lips, and then Alex’s as he let go of you, “I am so excited that you guys are here!”

“Woah Karl where's the consent?!” Alex feigned shock.

“Oops?” He giggled.

You rolled your eyes with a chuckle, “Can we come in? It’s cold out here!”

“Oh, yeah, sorry, come in, come in!” Karl quickly moved back inside, waving you and Alex in, “Sorry.”

~~

After getting your suitcases inside and being formally introduced to Shaun, Karl all but demanded for you to take pictures together, resulting in many shots that were blurry from too much laughter, but a few good ones, like the picture with the boys on either side of you, kissing your cheeks, which later went up on Instagram, and a picture of Karl, mid laugh looking back at you up on Alex’s back.

All of your previous anxiety was very much gone.

You laughed, looking at Karl’s phone as he showed the picture, “Oh my god!”

“That is amazing!” Alex agreed, leaning over you to look.

“It’s gonna be the stream announcement!” Karl declared, pulling up twitter.

You glanced at your phone, “Karl it’s almost one in the morning, no one would show up to a stream.”

Karl laughed, “You seriously underestimate the fans.”

The next thing you knew you were up upstairs, sitting off to the side of Karl’s streaming set up as Alex grabbed the guitar from the corner, “Karl you don’t even actually play, why do you have this?”

“Because I can?” He said absently, starting to set up for a stream.

The air was thick with excitement as Karl hit ‘go live’, and handed you and Alex extra sets of headphones.

Alex was still messing with the guitar, and you barley stifled laughs as he began to sing Country roads in a strange accent, and the chat filled with people.

“It’s pop off time!” Karl announced in a high pitched voice, making you laugh even more.

The face cam was turned on, and the yelling began.

After a few moments, and a couple more terrible bars of country roads, Karl grinned, “Everyone! This is, Quackity, our, uh, our guitarist for the day!”

Alex laughed, “We’re poppin off! We’re poppin off!”

“And (y/s/n)s here too!” Karl dragged your chair further in frame, “Welcome! Welcome!”

“It’s pop off central tonight boys!” You chuckled.

The alert box went insane as did the chat as Alex finally sat down next to you, and Karl stopped laughing enough to sit back up.

“Guys! Chill! You’re gonna break the alert box!”

You laughed again, “Yeah just tell your chat to stop, just knock it off, leave we’re done!”

Alex snorted, “It’s over!”

Karl pulled his chair closer to the desk, “Thanks for uh, being here, with the boys, uhh.”

He turned to Alex who was now essentially just spamming random chords, yelling, “I can’t hear you!”

You berried your face in your hands, trying to control your laughter.

Karl sighed and pulled his headphones off, “You know what? I’ll be right back, I’ll be right back.”

You immediately hopped seats as he left, “Hello chat! Hello!”

Alex leaned over, trying to grab the mic to pull it towards him, “hell-” part of the stand snapped, “Oh my god!”

“Oh my god you fucking broke it!” You yelled, pushing away from the desk.

“Oh god, hold on!”

He did his best to fix it, leaning in to talk to the chat, while Karl came back with another guitar.

“Why do you have two of them?” You laughed.

Karl grinned, “Technically it’s Shaun's!”

“OH WE”RE POPPING OFF! WE”RE POPPING OFF!”

You roared with laughter, quickly moving back out of the way as Karl jokingly swung the guitar at Alex.

Once you calmed down you caught a glimpse of the chat, “Guys I think you fucked something up!”

“Oh god!” Alex muttered.

“Wait- hold on- did-” Karl examined the mic, “Wait its unplugged!”

It took a few minutes to get things sorted out, and as Karl and Alex went back to yelling about popping off you spun around in your desk chair, “Pop off crew! Pop off crew!”

Things settled down again when you moved your chair back to between them, a sub goal was set for a height check, and you started to try and get things some what orderly.

“So yeah this isn’t just a Minecraft stream, I think we’re just hanging out, Popping off, you know, we’re gonna talk to chat-”

Karl began to laugh, and Alex tried not to chuckle as he said, “He’s laughing at you (y/n) he’s just laughing at you! What are you gonna do about it?”

“Listen man, I’m trying to get your fucking stream in order. If you just wanna fucking ignore me then fine!” You held your hands up in surrender.

“Well, I mean-”

Karl started to stand up, and you knew he was going for the fit check but Alex screeched, shoving his chair back, “Fuck off!”

“Wha?”

You laughed, “He thought you were going for the Hight check early man!”

“Dude it’s the fit check!”

Alex laughed as Karl sat back down, “Holy shit- cash app with the hundred tear ones!”

You giggled at the message, “They wanna see the height check! Who wants to see the height check? Who wants to see the height check chat?”

“No no no no! No height check early! It- it doesn’t matter, cause height is stupid, and a choice!” Alex struggled for words.

You shook your head whispering, “He just looks short next to Karl and he’s scared.”

“Shut up!”

~~

A while later, after both Karl and Alex’s stream descended into chaos or partial chaos, you found yourself tucked between them on the couch.

Karl’s fingers were intertwined with yours, and Alex’s head lay on your shoulder.

“I’m glad to have finally met you guys.” You murmured.

“Yeah,” Alex hummed, “Actually being able to cuddle is much better than the online thing.”

Karl hummed in agreement, “I wish you guys could be here all the time.”

“Let’s get a house somewhere.” You mused.

“Somewhere convenient for you two nerds to go to school.” Karl chuckled.

Alex yawned, “Somewhere near good take out.”

You smiled sleepily, “Anywhere with you guys is fine by me.”

Distantly a clock on the wall read 4:23 am.

[1-1snailxd-art]

Libraries are for Meetings

Masterlist 

Mobile App users: I suggest reading on Ao3 or on desktop version. I don’t understand why, but when I look at this fic on mobile the paragraph spaces aren’t there properly. If you know how to fix this, please let me know.

Overview 

Fandom: Sanders Sides

Type: Alternate Universe - University

Rating: Mature (mainly because of the thinking and character loss)

Relationships: Analogical (Platonic? Romantic? Who knows), Royality, possibly more to come

Characters: Virgil Sparks, Logan Mars, Patton Smiles, Roman Reels, original Deceit inspired character (they are sweet, I promise), and a few original characters and possibly more familiar names to come.

Summary: Virgil works as a cleaner in a library after loosing his university scholarship. He’s homeless, he’s lost, he’s confused and he has to admit he needs help. Cue an unpredictable meeting and suddenly there is someone willing to take him on the path of self discovery and acceptance. Will he accept it, or will he walk away like he normally does.

Virgil and Logan’s growth may be the main focus, but Patton and Roman do have their own story arcs. A few original characters to steer the story and a reimagined Deceit with their own quirky role to play.

Warnings: anxiety and panic, negative thinking, deaths (original characters), homophobia (and more. This is a tale of self discovery and acceptance), homelessness, different aspects of LGBTQIA+ presented (I probably won’t get the whole spectrum, but there are a few)

Chapter 1 - The Dark Librarian 

Music blasted through Virgil’s headphones as he finished piecing a gaming system back together. He was so use to doing this, he was certain he could finish the job with his eyes closed; not that his perfectionism would ever let him try. Checking the clock, he scribbled in his notebook to start working out the cost of his efforts.

 “Hey Virgil?... Sparks!”

“I told you not to call me by my surname.” Virgil grumbled, pulling his headphones off as he turned to face his visitor.

 A woman lent on the doorframe of the room, dressed in a light blue button up shirt and black slacks. Despite he hair being in a tight bun, a single strand hung loose near her face and she twirled it around her finger.

 “What do you need, Katie.” Virgil swooped his bangs off his face and gave her a half smile. “You always twirl your hair when you need something.”

“Read me like a book.”

“We are in a library. Makes sense that I’m good at reading.” Katie was avoiding all eye contact and Virgil groaned, “Spill those feels, Reels. It will be time for my shift to start if you keep stalling.”

Katie let out a nervous laugh, “Yeah, about that.”

“What?” Nervous energy started to build in Virgil’s gut at Katie’s response.

“Look, I know you hate being out the front during the day, but I need you to take the afternoon shift.” Virgil fixed Katie with a tired look as she rambled on. “The main library got in a whole bunch of new reference books and they have all been entered into the system incorrectly, and Tia – that new librarian- tried to fix it herself, but ended up messing up the whole system, and now she’s freaking out and she called me in hysterics because no one can borrow and what is the point of a library if you can’t borrow an-“

“Woah, woah,” Virgil waved his hands out in front of him to silence the freaked out librarian. “It’s fine, Katie. I can manage. It’s a Tuesday, nothing ever happens on a Tuesday.”

“I’ll make sure you get paid for the extra shift, and I’ll come and help you with your normal cleaning as soon as I’m done.”

“Whatever. It’s fine.” Virgil followed Katie out of the room, checking his keycard was in his pocket before closing the office door. “Message me if Tia screwed the computers up too much for you to handle.”

“You’re a lifesaver, Virgil.” Katie started racing towards the front door, before quickly turning to call back to him. “Oh, my brother Roman has booked the reading area at 4:30 and office 3 cancelled so it’s actually free.”

“Would you get out of here already, Reels.”

Katie flipped Virgil the bird before running out the wooden front door, leaving Virgil in the silence of the small, old library.

 *********************************

 As expected, the library was very quiet all afternoon. Virgil did his best to remain calm and come across as a professional as a few families came in briefly to borrow books with their small children. His ripped jeans and ‘Panic at the Disco!’shirt didn’t really scream ‘librarian’ but his clothing options were very limited at the moment. Not that he liked to admit it, but Virgil had been living on friends couches and in his library office since he lost his university scholarship. Katie was well aware of what Virgil was doing, but feigned ignorance; Virgil would talk to her when he was ready.

 “What’s up, Sparkles? Crawled out of your cave rather early today.” Virgil groaned at the sound of Roman’s voice, “Where’s Katie?”

Virgil tilted his head to the side and made sure Roman felt the full weight of the annoyance in his eyes. Katie’s use of his surname was in jest, a joke between coworkers and friends; Roman’s nickname always came across like an insult.

“Wow, touch-y.” Roman held his hands up in surrender, before readjusting his red and white jacket to appear more sincere. “Viiirgil, where is my delightful sister Katie?”

“There was a book emergency at the main library so she went to help out.”

Virgil continued pulling books off the shelf to inspect them for damage, but Roman wasn’t moving on.

 “Can I help you with something else?”

“Well I’m glad you asked,” Roman beamed and moved to lean on Virgil’s trolley. “Seeing as no one is in here, can I pl-“

“No.”

“Wha-?” Roman gasped as if he had been shot, “I didn’t even finish asking my question.”

“You didn’t need to.” Virgil returned a book and gave Roman a mischievous smile, “The answer is no.”

Roman stood up and let Virgil push the trolley back down the aisle and towards the main desk. For a moment he considered pulling the ‘My sister is your boss’ card or even turning on the waterworks for his deceased parents but decided against it. He didn’t know much about the mysterious worker, but he knew enough that power and sympathy would get him nowhere. Thankfully, Roman had one more trick up his sleeve.

 Virgil watched Roman move the lounge and beanbags around the reading area to extend his floor space. Booking dance spaces was expensive and the library proved to be a cheap, but inferior, alternative. When Roman threw his jacket aside, revealing his tight black tank top, Virgil was quick to avert his eyes to prevent himself from being caught blushing at the sight. Turning back to the computer, Virgil started scrolling through the booking lists and checking that he still had permanent hold over office 2, before going into the system to look for overdue loans.

Humming pulled Virgil away from his thoughts and he saw Roman humming a tune to himself as he danced around the area. There was a slight vibrating sound and Virgil looked to the end of the bench and saw Roman’s phone sitting on a pile of books. Walking over, the screen was lit up as the phone vibrated for an alarm titled ‘music please Virgil’.

 Roman paused mid step as the beginning of one of his dance pieces started to come through the overhead speakers, instead of Katie’s usual natural sounds.

“Thank you, Virgil!” Roman called as he re-centred himself and prepared to start his piece.

Shaking his head, Virgil retreated to the seclusion of the aisles to return more books to their shelves. Roman was annoying, but how could he deny the effort the guy had gone to. In all honesty, he was just glad to not have been yelled at or have someone demanding things from him. His opinion of Katie’s little brother shifted slightly in that moment and he couldn’t deny that Roman was truly a very talented young man.

  *********************************

 BANG

“Katie!”

BANG

“Roman!”

CLICK

Virgil’s heart was racing as he peaked out from an aisle and saw a man in a McDonalds uniform finish locking the front door and start running towards the back of the library. His brown hair was neatly styled, except for a few stray curls that sat on his forehead. He completely ignored Virgil, running straight for Roman and pulling him into a crushing hug.

“Roman, you’ve got to help me. I’ve done something terrible, horrible, unforgivable, utterly-“

 “Hey!” Virgil’s loud voice echoed through the empty library as he disconnected Roman’s music and stared at the pair. “You can’t just come in and lock up the library. Who do you think you are?”

“Chill out, Vee. Patton’s with me.” Roman held his arms securely around Patton and looked down at him with eyes full of confusion and concern.

“Don’t call me Vee, and I don’t care if he’s with you or not, you can’t just lock up the library whenever you want.”

Virgil started to walk back towards the door and Patton cried out.

“Please, don’t unlock it. I-“

A loud bang on the door stopped Virgil in his tracks and Patton let out a squeak.

 “Patton! Open this door immediately.”

The door shook as the person on the other side attempted to gain entry.

“Geez, Pat, what did you do to him?”

“One guy is making all that noise?” Virgil asked as the banging and yelling continued.

Patton nodded and buried his face into Roman’s shoulder.

“I r-real-ly mes-ssed up, Ro. The b-bi-g-ge-ss-st m-m-mes-“

Patton could barely speak through his sobs and irregular breathing. Virgil had no idea what was happening, but he wasn’t about to find out what would happen if the guy outside got to Patton.

 Virgil went to the desk and grabbed the keycard for office 3 and shoved it in Roman’s hand.

“Lock yourself in the office and put the dark screen up. I’ll handle this.”

“But Virgil, you don’t even know-“

“Just get him out of here before he passes out, ok!”

 Roman saw the determination in Virgil’s eyes and questioned no more, quickly leading Patton through the library to the office at the back. Virgil did his best to compose himself as he approached the door, hoping his outer self appeared more intimidating than he felt.

“Patton! You need to come out here and face me, NOW!”

 Virgil waited until he felt the man shift away from the door again before opening it. What stood before him was not the threat Virgil had pictured at all. Where he had imagined a heavily muscled maniac, a tall man in a white lab coat stood in his place. If it wasn’t for his red face behind squared, black glasses, and the way he quickly stormed passed Virgil, he wouldn’t have believed that this was the same person who had been trying to tear the door down.

 “Where is he?” The man started marching down to the back of the library, glancing down the aisles. “I’m going to kill that sorry excuse for a friend so I can dissect and study the brain of that idiotic, pun-generating humanoid.”

“Geez, dude, calm down.” Virgil called, as he attempted to catch up to the man after re-locking the door.

“Calm down? CALM DOWN! My life is over. How can I be calm?”

Virgil watched as the anger melted into sadness and the man clutched a warped laptop to his chest and slumped to his knees.

“He ruined everything.”

 Despite squeezing them shut, tears still streamed from the stranger's eyes. Virgil felt the adrenaline of the situation begin to fade from his system, and his legs and hands shook slightly as a result. Squeezing his hands into tight fists to calm them, Virgil knelt before the man and made his voice calm and soft.

“I’m guessing this has something to do with that laptop.”

“Yes,” the man sniffed and pulled a handkerchief from his coat pocket to clean himself up. “Patton…knocked it off of the table at the lab.”

“You chased Patton here from the science labs?” Virgil questioned, surprised when a nod confirmed the distance the two had traversed.

“All my work was on this laptop. Everything…gone.”

 Virgil had come across a few students over the years that had similar situations. He’d been given broken laptops, crushed USBs and smashed external hard drives. Everyone reacted a different way to the possibility of losing their data; though this was the first time he had seen someone hulk out over it.

“If you promise not to dissect anyone, I could have a look at it for you.”

“What? What can you do? It’s smashed.”

Virgil smirked as he reached out to carefully take the laptop out of the man's hands.

“You’d be surprised how tough some computers really are.”

“Well...um, thank you…”

“Virgil. Virgil Sparks.” He extended his hand out and offered a reassuring smile.

“Oh, um, I’m Logan Mars.” Logan shook Virgil’s hand and looked down in shame. “I’m sorry for my behaviour. I-it was incredibly uncalled for.”

“You’re right, but don’t sweat it. Come one,” Virgil stood and gestured to the offices, “let’s go check out this laptop, hey.”

 Logan slowly followed Virgil to his office, suddenly very aware of the immaturity of his actions. He was thankful that Virgil seemed so forgiving, anyone else would have called security or the police on him. It dawned on Logan that if that had been the case, he could have lost his scholarship and then his life would have been well and truly ruined.

“Thank you for not calling security.” Logan whispered as Virgil unlocked the office and started clearing the table of his work.

“Your welcome.”

“I’m serious. My behaviour was worthy of a call and that would have been the end of my time here. My scholarship would have b-”

“Lo, it’s fine.” Virgil finished boxing the gaming system and heaved it over to the corner of the room. “I wouldn’t jeopardise someone’s scholarship over a mental malfunction. I know what it’s like to lose everything over a simple mistake.”

“Pardon my question, but would you mind elaborating?”

Virgil let out a small chuckle as he searched through his boxes for tools and components for the laptop.

“I lost my scholarship due to a stupid mistake.” The look of sadness and curiosity in Logan’s eyes made Virgil nervous, but he continued. “I got into a fight in the middle of a lecture hall. Some moron made some…disgusting comments. I’ve spent my whole life being afraid to speak and listening to the shit people say about…”

Virgil couldn’t bring himself to say it. Shutting the closet door tight in his mind and quickly wiping a stray tear before Logan could see.

“Yeah, so, um… I decided to stand for what I believed in. Punches were thrown on both sides, but ultimately he ended up with a dislocated jaw and I ended up out of uni and out of money.”

“I’m sorry to hear that.”

 Logan couldn’t think of what else to say as Virgil set to work, pulling apart the laptop to inspect the components. Clearly, Virgil was a very multilayered individual. Logan had only seen the surface of who he was, and he was already fascinated with who the man was and who he wanted to be.

He watched curiously as Virgil pulled out various handmade devices and connected wires expertly in the sea of electrical components. Given the anatomy of a living organism, Logan could identify parts and their purposes with ease; but the scene before him now meant nothing. People had called Logan a genius his whole life, but watching Virgil now made him feel like a toddler in a 10th grade math class.

 “You are truly skilled in your field, Virgil. Are you taking classes elsewhere to hone your craft?”

Virgil laughed and turned to his own laptop screen, “I would need money to do that dude, and no one would give me another scholarship after losing my last one.”

“So where did you learn to do this?” Logan gestured at the table before him.

“At the Sparks institute of trial and error. Taught myself most things and Google has taught me the rest.”

“Unbelievable. You’re a genius.”

“Ew, seriously Logan, stop.” Virgil moved to grab a USB from his bag and plugged it into his laptop, pulling up another program and adjusting a few wires. “What I do is nothing special. I just know how stuff works.”

 Logan watched on in silence as Virgil continued. Clearly, he wasn’t going to take any of Logan’s compliments, and he didn’t give them out freely. The screen suddenly lit up with a document and Logan gasped and threw his arms around Virgil’s neck.

“You did it! You found it!”

“Ca-breathe.”

Quickly releasing Virgil, Logan apologised profusely for losing control of his emotions again. Virgil adjusted his shirt and fixed his hair as he set the computer to start copying the files across.

“You gotta settle down. I can’t guarantee that all your files are here, there is still a chance some of them are corrupted. I’ve got a program separating the corrupted files to a different USB and I’ll see what I can salvage and-“

Logan pulled Virgil into a hug, carefully this time. “Thank you so much, Virgil. If even half of my data and reports are safe, it’ll still be enough to show my professor.”

“I am not comfortable with this much physical contact with a stranger.”

Logan quickly let go and stepped back, “sorry. I, ah, went over the top again.”

 “Logan?”

The pair turned at the whispered voice to find Patton standing at the door, Roman protectively close by.

“Patton.” Logan’s voice was calmer now and it sounded strange to Virgil to hear him say Patton’s name in such a way.

“I’m so sorry, Logan. You’ve told me so many times not to be silly in the labs and I let you down. I’m sorry, Logie. Please forgive me.”

“Patton,” Logan took a deep breath and massaged his eyebrows. “You almost cost me everything. Without this data I would have had an incomplete research task which could have jeopardised my time here. Thankfully, Virgil was able to salvage some of my research. I-I-I’m so angry at you right now.”

Logan was staring intently at the corner of the office, while Patton’s eyes never left his friend, even as they filled with tears.

“I don’t think I can stop being angry with you for a while.” Roman placed a comforting hand on Patton’s shoulder as he let out a sob at Logan’s words. “I accept your apology, but I’m not ready to forgive you yet. Do you understand?”

Logan finally looked at Patton as he posed the question. Patton nodded and looked shocked as Logan held out his arms for a hug. Never one to refuse a hug, Patton raced forward and buried himself under Logan’s coat.

Virgil watched on awkwardly at the exchange. His mind trying to piece together the relationship between the three people in the room with him. Roman looked at his phone and started rapidly tapping on the screen.

 “I’ll make it up to you, Logan. I promise.” Patton managed to say, as his sobbing finally diminished. “You are my oldest friend and I would never purposefully do anything to ruin our friendship.”

“I know, Patton.” Logan looked over to Roman, who had just pocketed his phone. “Would you mind if Patton stayed with you and Katie for a while.”

“Wha-“ fresh tears started pouring from Patton’s eyes as he lent back to look up at Logan, but the man remained focused on Roman.

“Already organised, Lo.” Roman wrapped his arms around Patton’s waist from behind. “It’s ok, Pat. We’ve been meaning to spend more time together and Logan just needs some space.”

 Virgil didn’t think it was possible for Patton’s eyes to get any wider, but they did as Roman slowly backed them out of the room. When the sound of the door closing echoed through the library, Logan’s shoulders slumped once again but this time no tears fell.

“I’ve known Patton since I was seven years old. He’s like a brother to me. It kills me to push him away like that.”

“Then why did you?”

“He needs to learn that there are times that I need to be taken seriously. Besides, he and Roman needed a good excuse to take their relationship to the next level.”

———————————————————————

End note:

Thanks for reading and I hope you enjoyed it. More chapters to come in the future. Feel free to give me feedback, I am always happy to accept constructive feedback as it helps support my future writing. 

💜🐌

——————————————————————

Chapter 2 ----- Masterlist 

What else have I done:

The Perfect Ring (oneshot - analogical proposal)

You Promised (oneshot - prinxiety angst/injury/near death) 

Sides of a Hero (Completed Fic - sides are fusions of impulses and aspects of Thomas. Virgil has a depressing past that he is forced to face thanks to Deceit and Rage. Was canon compliant at the time of completion)

The Shield to your Sword (WIP - A fantasy/magic au - Prinxiety (Royal Roman and orphan Virgil - they’ll admit to their love eventually), Virgil angst, non binary, healer Logan, *spoiler* Patton) 

Check out my other blog for random fandom reblogs and stuff @snail-giggles

[bittyreaders]

Timid Reader & Underswap Bros Part II (Re-Write)

Mr. Blue was back. Again.

You glared at him from the safety of the top floor of the Yellow House, nose pressed against the windowsill, only your eyes and the top of your head visible. The skeleton was talking to Rivet, who was sitting at her desk trying to get through some paperwork. He was waving his arms around, cheeks flushed and eyes narrowed, but wasn’t yelling - you couldn’t hear what he was saying from here.

And here was where you would stay until he was gone. The skeleton had been coming in every afternoon for the past week, desperately trying to talk to you. Rivet and Sweets had distracted him, reminding him that the Pen was off-limits (last Saturday had been a one-time thing). His amazingly-tall brother had come in the first day as well, slouched in an orange hoodie and looking ready to take a nap standing up. Despite the heavy lids, his eyes had been sharp enough to pick out your nose pressed against the glass of the Yellow House window, and after registering your intense glare he’d had the good grace to look away in discomfort.

You’d found being angry was easier than being afraid. When you were afraid, your emotions were out of your control - worry and despair cutting off any chance of rational thought as adrenaline took over, demanding immediate flight from whatever the threat was. Anger let you be in control - if you were angry at the threat, then you didn’t have room to be afraid. So, from a distance, you drew up as much anger as your little body possessed, and aimed it squarely at Mr. Blue and his brother.

The brother - Sweets called him Stretch once, was that his name? It was as good as any other - didn’t come back again, and you congratulated yourself on having such a fearsome glare. Mr. Blue returned every afternoon, however, alone now and with an apologetic slump to his shoulders each time. Beneath the weak shoulders, however, was a burning determination to write his wrong. He was nearly desperate to apologize to you in person - if you hadn’t been petrified at the thought of being within five feet of him, you’d have admired his tenacity.

Today he had something clutched in his hand and was gesturing wildly with it as he spoke. Rivet and Sweets both looked interested, nodding along with what he was saying up until the thing slipped from his grip and smacked the deer in the face. Her nose wrinkled and her ears folded back against her head in displeasure, but she picked up the item and examined it, ignoring what looked like Mr. Blue’s babbled apologies. She interrupted him to ask something, and he immediately brightened up and leaned closer, talking faster and with more gesticulating than before. After a moment, Rivet nodded and gave the black square to Sweets, who gave a jaunty salute and began hauling it off the desk. The deer laughed and gave her a lift down, placing her on the floor and out of your line of sight.

You ducked away from the window as both Rivet and Mr. Blue looked over at the Pen, feeling too tired to bring up the energy to glare. Being angry took more energy than being scared - when you were scared, it happened naturally, a flood of adrenaline fueling your fight-or-flight response. But when you were angry, you had to choose to be angry, choose to expend your energy on being upset, choose to glare and huff and sneer and throw angry words around. It was exhausting.

Knowing that Sweets would be along soon with the mysterious black square, you sat on your edge of the doll bed and picked at the corner of the quilt that covered it. It was quiet and safe in your little room, and you took a few deep breaths to center yourself. Sweets had suggested using meditation when you were upset, but it didn’t do much good when you couldn’t ‘center’ yourself in the first place.

In no time Sweets was there, dragging the black thing behind her, face flushed and sweaty. “Delivery!” She called out in a cheerful voice, despite her rosy cheeks. “Straight from Mr. Blue to you!” With one last heft, she dragged it into the room and let it drop to the carpeted floor. You craned your neck and peered down at the thin, black rectangle of plastic and glass.

It was a phone - one of those smartphones that had a touch screen and no keyboard, with the power and volume buttons on the side. It was nearly as tall as Sweets, making it all the more impressive that she had managed to lug it all this way. When she dropped it the screen blinked to life, revealing a picture of a meadow with a tree, and a clock reading “6:50” over a line of text saying ‘Slide up to unlock.’

“A...phone?” You stood and bent over the device, noting that there was no battery or signal indicator. A monster phone, then - one that didn’t need to be charged and that ran on magic.

“Yep!” Sweets put her hands on her hips and blew some sweaty hair out of her face. “Blue got it for you.”

“...Why?” You tried to wrap your head around the idea. Having regained her breath, Sweets shifted the phone, carefully propping it up on the wall next to the window. She unlocked it with a sweep of her hand, revealing the home screen. There were a few small squares with different names - ‘Contacts,’ ‘Undernet,’ ‘Camera,’ ‘Face-Snap,’ and two folders. One was labeled ‘Pictures’ and the other ‘Games.’

“He said,” Sweets huffed, adjusting the screen so it was only slightly tilted, “it was to better apologize to you.” The camera, which was in the middle of the top of the phone, lit up when she pressed the little blue button with a white camera outline on it. The screen went black, but a quick press of a button that had the same camera picture with a turning arrow under it revealed the inside of the room, creating a perfect mirror of the bed, Sweets, and you. Grinning, Sweets pressed the screen again, and with a flash the picture was burned into the phones memory.

“I don’t want him to apologize,” you huffed, wrinkling your face at the bright light, “I want him to go away.”

“He’s not going to go away until he apologizes. He’s very determined.” There was weight behind that word, the way she said it, though neither of you knew why. “Just let him say sorry over the phone.” She peeked out the window and flashed someone a thumbs up. A moment later the phone let out a loud jingle, and the mirror image of the room was replaced with the symbol for the Face-Snap app (half camera-motif, half smiley-face). INCOMING FACE-SNAP FROM BLUE SERIF, the screen announced, and without waiting Sweets smashed her hand against the green ‘accept’ icon.

The screen went blue for a moment, before it was adjust to reveal Mr. Blue’s smiling visage as the phone was drawn back to a proper distance. Behind him was the inside of the shop part of the shelter - he was sitting on one of the couches by the Reader changing rooms. The shelter was a non-profit (as Rivet’s terrible ramen habit would attest), but there were several monsters in the community who made clothing and furniture that was Reader-sized and sold it through the shelter. There were shelves of clothing, tools, furniture, vitamins, and toiletries, all fit for their tiny bodies. After some Monsters complained about having to stand while their picky Readers took hours picking what they wanted, the deer had invested in a pair of comfy couches for Monsters to use. Mr. Blue was sitting cross-legged on one of these, and as you watched he turned so he was sitting sideways on the couch and perched the phone on the top of the nearest shelf, bringing him to ‘eye-level’ with you and Sweets.

“Hello!” He greeted cheerily, sitting back and dropping his hands into his lap. You hadn’t noticed it before, but his blue irises were shaped like soft, rounded stars.

“Hi Mr. Blue!” Sweets waved cheerily, dropping to sit beside you on the bed. “The phone works perfectly!”

“That’s good!” Mr. Blue bounced a bit where he sat, the stars growing even brighter. “I was worried the touch screen wouldn’t react to your fingers!”

“Well, I had to use my whole hand, but it works. That’s what’s important!” The two shared large grins, before Mr. Blue’s attention shifted to you. His expression softened to one that could only be explained as ‘hangdog.’

“Hello,” he greeted again, his voice much softer, and you realized something that nearly took your breath away. You were facing - interacting! - with a monster, a giant being of magic and unfathomable strength, and you weren’t afraid. You were nervous, sure, but you were always nervous when meeting new people. Even other Readers made you nervous when they wanted to engage in small talk! Nervous - not terrified, not panicked, not crying and blacking out and suffocating on your own innumerous fears. Butterflies in the stomach. Worry over saying something embarrassing. Normal nerves.

Without thinking you leaned to the side, trying to peek out the window and see if you could spot the monster on the couch, but Sweets wrapped an arm around your shoulder and tugged you back, forcing you to focus on the screen. Mr. Blue sat patiently, still smiling at you both, stars dancing in his eyes. Swallowing your absolutely-normal social nerves, you nodded to him and let out a quiet “Hi.”

His visage immediately brightened, skull lighting up in delight. “Hello!” He said again, with more enthusiasm, smile stretching even further across his face. “I’m Sans Serif, but everybody calls me Blue because there’s a lot of Sans up here and it would be confusing if we all went by Sans and since Sans got up here first - Alpha Sans I mean - he gets to keep his name while the rest of us have nicknames but that’s okay because I like the name Blue. Blue is one of my favorite colors, after all! But my brother likes orange. His name is Papyrus by the way, but everybody calls him Stretch because-”

Sweets cleared her throat, trying to get the rambling skeleton back on track, and had to do it a few times to get him to calm down. He trailed off, and a brilliant blue blush covered his cheeks.

“Oops, I guess I got a little carried away, huh?”

Sweets gave him a patient smile and squeezed your shoulder, her arm still around you. “Wasn’t there something you wanted to say?” She coaxed.

“Oh, right!” Mr. Blue went from beaming to ashamed in barely a second. “Um, oh shoot, I don’t know you name…”

“I don’t have one,” you answered, used to the question from other Readers. Names were given by owners, and you didn’t have an owner. Rivet sometimes named the Readers that stuck around for a long time, but you hadn’t been given one, despite living in the shelter for three months.

Mr. Blue gave you an odd look, but steamrolled ahead. “Oh-kay, well, little green Reader, I wanted to apologize.” He moved so he was sitting on his knees, looking solemnly at the camera. “I’m very, very sorry for scaring you last week! I should have known better to approach you, and I definitely should have read the sweater pamphlet more thoroughly instead of charging in like a - like a bonehead.” He grimaced at the pun and Sweets smirked (you had no doubt she had helped him script part of this apology, and had thrown that phrase in as punishment). “I’m sorry I made you feel unsafe, and I promise to never come near you if you don’t want me to again.”

Sincerity shone in every line of his face, and after a moment’s thought you found yourself nodding, accepting his soul-felt words. “Okay,” you muttered, voice quiet.

Sparkles of magic appeared around Mr. Blue’s face, and the stars in his eyes grew bigger than before. “Really?” You nodded, and he began swaying in his seat, looking like he wanted to jump up and down. “Oh wowie, I’m so glad, I was worried you would hate me forever! I’m so happy!”

You gave Sweets a questioning look, but she just shrugged and looked equally pleased. “I told you, Blue, they’re too nice to hate anybody!” She tugged on your sleeve. “After all, the root of green is kindness!”

“Mweh-heh-heh! You’re right! And now we can talk every day!”

You stiffened, and having her arm around you, Sweets notice. “Maybe not every day, Blue. But what if you called a few times a week? I’m sure they’d love to chat with you every once in a while.” The pink Reader ignored your questioning look. “After all, you must have plenty of amazing stories, being the vice captain of the Swap Royal Guard!”

“That I do! Plenty of amazing, daring, heroic stories of heroism and strength!” Blue stood on the couch, putting one fist to his chest, the other on his hip, and loudly laughed - you could hear it not just from the phone, but through the walls of the doll house. The phone’s camera was wide enough that it caught Rivet appearing behind the bouncy skeleton, grimacing at the sight of dirty boots on her upholstery and the disruptive noise he was making. Sweets made a quiet, delighted little ‘oh no!’ sound beside you - she was always one for drama.

“Mr. Blue,” Rivet crossed her arms and glared at the skeleton, “While I am very pleased you have made friends with one of my Readers, I am going to ask you to remove your boots from my couch.”

The skeleton blushed once more, in embarrassment this time, and quickly dropped to sit on the couch, boots dangling over the edge. “Sorry, Miss Rivet,” he shot a rueful look to the phone, the pliable bone above his nose-hole wrinkling when he saw Sweets giggling at him. “I just got excited.”

“Well, you need to get excited elsewhere for now. It’s six, and I need to close up and get everybody their dinner. It’s pizza night - you don’t want to see what will happen when fifty-six Reader’s are delayed getting their pizza.” The deer’s expression softened and she winked at the skeleton.

“I would not want to stand in the way of pizza, even if tacos are the superior food!” Blue beamed at her, then turned back to the phone. “I will talk to you both soon!”

“How about Thursday?” Sweets suggested, while beside her you mouthed ‘again?’ to yourself.

“Thursday it is!” Blue beamed. “I will see you both then!” He waved, and Sweets gave a little wave back. You copied her, though still confused. The skeleton reached up for his phone, filling the screen with blue once again, and cut the call. Sweets kept her arm around you until the bell above the door jingled, followed by the sound of the lock turning.

“Well, that went better than expected!” The compassionate Reader finally released you and flopped back on the bed with a huff.

“Doesn’t he need his phone back?” You asked, standing and poking at the now-black screen. The date and time popped up, ‘6:01’ beaming back at you, and a feeling of amazement took the place of confusion. You’d had a ten-minute conversation! With a monster!

“Nah, it’s one of his old phones, he said.” Sweets had sat back up and was watching you, beaming. “He brought it for you.”

“...me?”

“You!” She giggled and threw her arms around you. “I’m so proud of you for talking to him!”

Blushing, you reached up and hugged one of her arms to yourself. “I only said, like, two words.”

“Which is two more than you’ve said before!” She squeezed, then released you and jumped to her feet. “Blue is going to call every other day now, and you can talk to him as much or as little as you want. It’s called exposure therapy.”

“...he’s going to be naked?”

Sweets let out a delighted laugh, and you realized it was the first time you’d made a joke around her.

“No!” She pulled you up, off the bed, and led you from your room. “Unless you’re into that…” You blushed, going as pink as her sweater, and she laughed again and led you down the stairs. “Honey, I think we just figured out how to help you get over your fears! Now c’mon, it’s pizza night!”

She led you from the Yellow House, towards the Readers gathered and waiting for their favorite dinner of the week, and for once didn’t mind becoming part of the group. You were too busy thinking of starry eyes and patient smiles to worry.

Blue called again on Thursday, at seven o’clock exactly. You were laying on your bed, reading a book from the little library. The Westing Game by Ellen Raskin. It was a weird murder-mystery, and you couldn’t figure out if the character Turtle was a human with the nickname Turtle, or an actual turtle-type monster. She could be a Woshua, but you’d never met one with a single pigtail before…

The phone chimed, the Face-Snap app appearing on the formerly black screen, with the line ‘INCOMING FACE-SNAP FROM BLUE SERIF’ flashing beneath it. You jumped, losing your place in the book, and frantically looked around for Sweets. The pink Reader was nowhere to be seen, however - she was likely helping some other Readers with their evening chores, or reading with the book club that met every Tuesday and Thursday evening. This left you alone, with a monster calling on the phone. It was up to you to answer it.

Or I could just let it ring…

You thought of the first time he’d called, how you hadn’t been relaxed but hadn’t been terrified. You’d had social-butterflies in your stomach, but had overall enjoyed the conversation (even if it was mostly him apologizing, despite you not needing one). You thought of how novel it was, to face a monster and hold a conversation, not run away screaming or shut down completely. All you had to do was hit the ‘accept’ button, and that feeling would come back. You probably wouldn’t have to talk much - Blue could converse enough for five monsters…

With decisive movements that made you appear more confident than you felt, you folded down the corner of the page you were on and put your book aside, then stood and approached the phone. Biting down on your fear (on your timidity), you pressed the green button.

Mr. Blue’s face filled the screen, and he beamed, looking beyond pleased that you had answered. “Hello again, green-Reader!” He greeted, leaning back from the screen slightly. You didn’t know where he was, but there was a black flag with a skull-and-crossbones motif on the wall behind him. Home, maybe? Or a skeleton bar? Was that a thing?

You raised your hand and twiddled your fingers in response, the word ‘hello’ getting stuck in your throat. This was a bit more nerve-racking than you thought it would be, without Sweets there to ground you.

Mr. Blue didn’t seem bothered by your silence. He just beamed and twiddled his fingers back. “I’m so glad you picked up, I was worried I’d called at a bad time. I just got home from the Palace! Well, it’s not really a palace, but that’s what we all call it, because that’s where the Kings and Queens and Princes and Princesses all live. It’s funny, all the Asriel’s are boys, but all the Chara’s and Frisk’s are boys or girls or agender, depending on what they want to be. And all the Flowey’s want to be called boys, but technically flowers don’t have genders. I guess what they want is more important though, right?” When you nodded in agreement (you weren’t a boy or a girl, either - you were just you, a timid Reader who was maybe beginning to feel okay with being you), he beamed and kept going.

He told you all about his job as Vice Captain of the Swap Clan Royal Guard, which mostly involved patrolling the Palace and looking cool for photo ops with visitors. He also helped run an Obstacle-Course Club with two friends named Papyrus and Edge. They had commandeered a large part of a local park for their work, and had built various obstacle courses with moving parts, so they could be rearranged to give a new, different challenge each week. They even had a few mini-courses for the local children to play on. Even their lazier brothers (Sans, Stretch, and Red) had chipped in, helping with the construction some and falling asleep in various impossible ways on the multitude of ladders, ropes, ramps, tunnels, rock walls, stone walls, spinning tubes, et. all.

This turned into him telling you all about his brother Stretch. Stretch was long, lanky, and lazy to boot. He was a part-time scientist at the Royal Labs, and when he wasn’t working or goofing off with his friends (the aforementioned Sans and Red) he was at Muffets, drinking honey and flirting with anything that moved. Mr. Blue spoke of him with fondness, laced with exasperation. He moved on to talking about his father, Gaster, who was the Riverperson underground, but now ran a successful cab company with all the other riverpeople from the various Undergrounds. They all lived together in a nice cabin-like house on the edge of town, right next to the woods and near a few of their alternates.

Mr. Blue chatted for nearly an hour about his life, asking you questions and accepting all your nods and non-verbal answers as they came. He never once asked you to talk, or asked why you weren’t talking when he knew you could. He just...rolled with it, carried the entire conversation himself, and was happy to do it.

Around eight o’clock he slowed down, and you heard someone knocking on a door on his side of the phone. “Pappy, I’m talking to my new friend!” He called, turning away from the phone, and you went bright-pink. Friend? He thought of you as a friend? The only friend you had was Sweets, and sometimes you felt more like a patient than a friend with her. A deep, warm feeling grew around your SOUL, leaving you feeling pleased. Blue turned back to the screen, looking disappointed, and you realized you hadn’t heard anything he or his brother had said to each other.

“I’ve got to go, green Reader! We have company over for a movie night, and I must prepare my famous nachos.” He looked disappointed at having to say goodbye, and you mirrored his sad smile. It had been fun, listening to him enthuse over his job and family. “May I call you again, sometime? Maybe - not tomorrow, I have night patrol...Saturday? Can I call you on Saturday so we can talk more?”

You didn’t even have to think before nodding - you wanted this. Wanted to talk to him more, wanted to hear him be so completely over-the-top with his ideas and passions, wanted to learn more about this monster who didn’t make you feel scared when you talked to him over the phone. Talking to him made you feel normal. Less frightened, less wary, more like you had a place in this world. Even if you weren’t talking back yet, just watching and listening to him proved one thing: you could stop being timid. You could change your fate, even if it was only with this one monster.

“Great! I’ll call you on Saturday then!” Blue beamed, stars in his eyes once again. “Goodnight, green Reader!”

“Goodnight, Mr. Blue.”

The stars grew, and a blush colored the bone beneath his eye sockets. With a soft ‘Mweh-heh-heh!’ Mr. Blue closed the connection, leaving you alone in your room once again. You laid back on your bed and thought about everything he had told you - all about his life and family. You didn’t have anything as interesting to talk to him about. He knew all about the shelter - his brother was friends with Miss Rivet, and the deer was warming up to Mr. Blue, too. Your life before the shelter was only a few hours long, and they were not a few hours you wanted to relive. Frowning, you flipped onto your front and picked your book back up.

Maybe he wouldn’t mind that you didn’t have much of a past - after all, you were three months old. Maybe he wouldn’t mind if you talked about your books and drawings and people-watching habits. Maybe, being the Magnificent Blue, he would be magnificently patient with you as you taught yourself to talk to him. Maybe, just maybe, his patience was what you needed to emerge from your timid shell.

Speaking of shells, back to the mystery of Turtle. Human or turtle-monster? It was hard to tell...

Mr. Blue called like clockwork, every other day. On weekdays he called at seven, right after you both finished supper. On weekends it varied - sometimes in the morning, sometimes in the afternoon, most often times in the evenings. You kept an ear out for the tinny ring of the phone, rushing to your room whenever you heard it. Sweets had joined in once or twice, but after seeing you lunge to answer the call after the first ring, she left you to it.

A month into your bi-daily phone calls, he asked if you wanted to have lunch together. “We could have a picnic in the backyard of the shelter,” he’d explained when you gave him a confused look. “Or even inside the shelter, if you want! It’s my Clans turn to do the city sweeps - we change it up every month, that way there’s always guards on the streets, but also in the Palace, just in case, and this way it feels fair, y’know? And I asked for the route that goes by the shelter, so we can try having lunch together!” He blushed a bit, though he looked pleased. “I thought - you’ve been doing so good talking to me over the phone, maybe it won’t be so scary? Now that we’re friends?”

You’d hesitantly accepted, and now here you were, standing on a large red and white checkered picnic blanket in the backyard of the shelter, trying to tamp down your nerves to an acceptable level. Rivet and Sweets had both agreed to the idea wholeheartedly, and the deer had even set up a nice little area for the two of you to meet, away from the large playground and the miniature Reader-sized pool. The scent of blooming spring flowers from the garden beds along the fence was almost overwhelming, but you were thankful for it. The heady sensation kept your mind off your growing not-just-social nerves.

“Hello, green Reader!”

Blue was here, standing by the back door to the shelter, on the other side of the lawn. He had a wicker basket thrown over one arm and was nervously shifting his weight, despite the million-watt smile on his face. You couldn’t help but swallow, hard - he was much, much bigger in person than on the phone. He didn’t make a move to approach, though, staying where he was, swinging the basket a bit.

“Is it alright if I approach?” He asked after a moment, watching you carefully, though for what you didn’t know. Panic attack? Fainting? Booking it out the nearest crack in the wall? You entertained all the options for a moment before forcing yourself to be rational. You had been talking to Blue for a month now, and the two of you were friends. He’d told you all about his family, and his friends, and had even cried with you for a few minutes when he’d stepped on a butterfly and killed it while going for a jog. He was a good monster, and would never, ever hurt you.

Plopping back down on the blanket (not even realizing you’d stood), you nodded. Used to your silence, he beamed and plodded over, carefully setting the basket down before sitting on the other side of the blanket. He was too far away to touch you without having to stretch all the way out, and you smiled at him to show you appreciated the space he was giving you.

“For lunch today I have made the most fabulous, the most wonderful, the most magnificent, meal of all time!” He threw open the top of the basket with a bit more zeal than required, and you knew what was coming next.

“Tacos?”

“Correct, tiny green Reader! Tacos!” With flourish befitting a magician he pulled out a tupperware container stuffed to the brim with both soft and hard-shell tacos, each carefully filled and sprinkled with MTT-Brand edible glitter in a rainbow of colors. You resigned yourself to nibbling off one of his monster-sized tacos for lunch. You didn’t mind much, really - sometimes, when Rivet was sick or something happened that called her away from the shelter, you and the other Readers ate monster-sized food. Shrinking spells were tricky and took a certain flick of the wrist to be successful. There were stories of an elephant-sized teddy bear that some of the older Reader’s whispered about, but Rivet denied.

Blue didn’t pop open the box of tacos, however - instead, he reached back into the basket and pulled out a smaller tupperware, filled with at least three dozen soft-shell tacos, each with a different color of glitter decorating it. “Here you are, tiny green Reader!” He announced, popping off the lid, which he set in front of you. Bright blue magic picked up a few of the tacos and set them on the lid, turning it into a plate. “I could not find a way to make tiny hardshell tacos, so I hope you do not mind soft shell!”

You didn’t really know the difference - most of meals at the shelter consisted of casseroles, pastas, and pizzas. Simple things that could be made in large quantities to feed all the hungry mouths. You’d never eaten tacos before (though you’d had taco casserole, and nachos). Shrugging, you gave a small ‘thank you’ and lifted up one of the yellow-sparkled tacos. On the phone you’d begun talking to him a little bit, but seeing him now, in all his 5’6 glory, made you nervous to speak once again.

It didn’t last. Flavor exploded on your tongue, spiced meat mixing with cool cheese and the sliver of lettuce and tomato that had been slid in, all wrapped within the delicious, flaky tortilla. The MTT-glitter added just the slightest hint of sweet to the otherwise spicy meal, contrasting in a surprisingly palatful way.

“Oh my stars,” you took a second bite, then a third, woofing down the first miniature taco in a minute flat. “This is amazing!” You praised Mr. Blue, who had begun on his own taco. Stars exploded on his eyes and his cheeks lit up as he chewed (did he open his mouth? How did he eat?), looking beyond pleased with your praise. You picked up a second taco (pink sparkles this time) but took your time with this one, savoring the meat and cheese. Without realizing it you began making pleased little hums and purrs as you ate.

Mr. Blue’s grin grew even wider at the happy noises, and he scooted just a bit closer to you, happily munching on his own food. He didn’t talk, just enjoyed the calm silence. Rivet had convinced the other Readers to stay inside on this lovely spring day by offering a special popcorn lunch with a movie, meaning they didn’t have to worry about anybody but themselves. So you both ate the tacos and enjoyed the sun.

By the end of your third taco you were beginning to feel full, but you didn’t want the rest to go to waste. Mr. Blue chuckled, having already polished off his fourth taco, and leaned towards you a bit. “You have something on your-” His hand reached for you, and you jerked back, dropping the last of your taco and flinching from his touch.

“Oh - oh stars, I’m sorry! I didn’t mean to scare you!” Mr. Blue withdrew his hand and sat back, giving you plenty of room and looking as guilty as sin. “Oh jeez, I’ve just ruined the day,” he muttered to himself, voice dropping to near silence. Even without hearing him, you could see the emotions flicking across his face. You weren’t called a Reader for nothing, after all. Guilt was there, but so was anger - anger at himself, at his actions, anger at not thinking, anger at himself for scaring you.

You paused - you weren’t scared. You’d been startled, sure, but...but you weren’t scared. Not of him. As Mr. Blue muttered something that sounded like ‘stupid’ to himself a few times, you brushed off the rest of the taco (which had fallen on your lap and stained your jeans) and stood. The monster noticed and went still, ready and waiting for you to bolt back to the shelter, away from his stupid hands and his stupid impetuousness.

Instead you approached him, carefully, slowly, across the checkered blanket. He had dropped his hands in his lap, and you wobbled across the uneven cloth to pat his knee instead. Being even closer to Mr. Blue reminded you just how tiny you were, but it didn’t bother you. Not with him.

“I’m not scared of you,” you patted his knee again. “You just startled me.”

He stared down at you with tiny, quivering pinpricks of light, stunned, and at a loss you gave his knee a third ‘pat-pat.’ The lights exploded into stars, and his magic sparked around his face, creating sparkles that wouldn’t be out of place in one of the manga’s from the library (all donated by the plethora of Alphys’ & Undyne’s on the mountain).

“Really?” He asked, breathless. “You’re not scared of me?” His hands twitched, and you moved back a bit to avoid getting taken out by any over-enthusiastic gesticulating.

“Well, I - I don’t want to be picked up, o-or anything like that,” you looked away, feeling your own face heat up, “But I’m not scared you’re gonna hurt me anymore.”

Mr. Blue let out a little high-pitched ‘squeeeeeeeee!’ noise, bringing his hands to his chest as he bounced in place. “Oh, little green Reader, I’m so happy you trust me!”

Trust him? Yes. You did trust him. Nobody who cried over stepping on a bug could be a bad guy, you had decided. And him not being a bad guy meant you could...possibly...trust him. Not to pick you up or handle you, but to be near you? Yes. You trusted him.

Feeling a bit overwhelmed at the realization that you trusted a monster, you trudged back to your tacos and sat back down, suddenly feeling hungry once more. You nibbled on your fourth, decorated with pale-green glitter, just like your sweater, and watched Mr. Blue come slowly off his ‘friendship high’ to resume eating his own lunch. By the time his watch beeped, signaling the end of his lunch break, you had both eaten far too many tacos and were basking in the sunshine and the silent glow of your newfound ‘trust-ship.’

“I must be off, little green Reader!” He announced, shutting both his and your tupperware containers. “I will give this to Miss Rivet, so that you may have tacos whenever you wish!” He shook the box a bit. “It is all monster food, so they shall never go bad!” He placed it on the blanket, then pulled out an even larger tupperware full to bursting with even more tiny tacos. “And I brought these so your Reader friends will not be jealous! They shall also have some of the Magnificent Blues Terrific Tacos!” You noticed that these tacos didn’t have any glitter on them, and felt a little ping of warmth in your SOUL. Your tacos were special, different from the rest, because Mr. Blue had made them for you, and you alone. He packed up his own lunch but, before standing, he gave you a long, hesitant look. “Reader, may I - may I give you a pat before I go?” He asked.

A pat? Had he meant a pet? You thought of Doggo, who had a seeing-eye Reader who visited the shelter every few weeks to do some chores for Miss Rivet, like patching the roof or helping build on to the crazy backyard playground. He was always going on about being pet, and in turn petting his little Reader. The pets always looked...kind of nice. Soft. Slowly, you nodded.

With a frankly ridiculous and slow movement, Blue reached out with his hand flattened, and gave you a gentle ‘pat, pat’ on the head, just like you’d done with his knee. He drew his hand back and, looking like a kid in a candy store, said ‘Goodbye!’ before getting to his feet and fleeing into the shelter, nearly vibrating with excitement. You heard him whoop loudly a few minutes later, after you assumed he’d escaped the shelter and resumed his route. Grinning like an idiot,  you reached up and ran a hand over your head, where he’d pet you.

Pat, pat.

You liked pats.

Phone calls nearly every day now, and lunch twice a week (every Tuesday and Thursday). You began talking back on the phone, telling Blue (he’s insisted you drop the ‘Mr.’ to his name, since you were friends) all about life at the Shelter, about the kitchen and the mountain and the other Readers and the library. You told him all about the books you read, and he’d even gotten a copy of The Westing Game and was reading it with you, both of you promising not to read ahead, and together you were working out who the murderer was. Blue had even looked it up and confirmed that Turtle was, in fact, a human with a weird nickname, not a turtle-monster named by Asgore.

Sweets was over the moon. As you opened up more to Blue, you began leaving your room more often, and even spent time at the art corner or at the communal library pillow, not talking much but still being there, with others, instead of closing yourself off. You no longer ran for cover the second an unfamiliar monster visited the shelter - you kept your distance, but you didn’t hide, didn’t panic. On the few occasions it rained on a Tuesday or Thursday and you had to eat your picnic lunch inside, Blue made enough for all the other Readers and Rivet and everybody ate lunch together.

But you were the only one he pet.

It had moved on from pats. Your second lunch, you moved to sit beside him, and he gave you a pat at the end of the meal. The third time you had spoken for a few minutes about a book you found that you liked, and he’d patted your head and encouraged you to tell him more. By the sixth time, if he didn’t have something in his hands, he was patting and petting you, or just resting a hand on your back, as much as you’d let him. You found it soothing and comforting, and no longer had any fear that he would hurt you on purpose. (You were a bit of a realist, and accidents did happen, all the time).

You let him pick you up, once. You’d been showing him how part of the crazy jungle gym worked (swinging from an ascending set of monkey bars to a tube that led to a twisty slide) and had fallen and hurt your ankle. He’d spent three minutes dithering before asking, point-blank, if he could pick you up to take you inside, and after an equal time of dithering on the answer, you’d said yes. He’d moved with that exaggerated slowness again, making sure you could see and knew what he was going to do. He’d scooped you up and held you close to his chest, close enough you could hear his SOUL pulsing, and taken you inside. Rivet had wrapped your ankle and warned you to be more careful, though there was no heat in the warning and she looked beyond pleased that Blue was holding you. The skeleton had kept you in his hand for the rest of lunch, and you couldn’t find any reason to object.

That hadn’t been repeated - he was respecting your boundaries as much as possible, and the second you showed discomfort he backed off and made sure to understand what he had done wrong. He understood when you had a bad day because of a nightmare and kept his hands to himself. He understood when you were in a cuddly mood and wanted to hug his hand. He understood, and you honestly couldn’t ask for anything better.

You trusted him, and you trusted he would always do what was best for you. In return, you would do your best for him.

Two months later, Blue was back on city patrol. You liked seeing him in his uniform - he looked like a police officer, but instead of a badge, he had the sigil of the Swap Clan embroidered over his chest pocket. He also had a peaked cap that made his head look rounder than before. He kept stopping by for lunch, always cheery and saying hello to all the Readers he knew, but reserving most of his attention for you.

Today he didn’t bring in his basket, or his smile. Today his arrival was preceded by a screech of metal as outside the shelter, on the slick rainy street, one car turned too fast and slid, straight into another that was waiting to turn. In the crash and the chaos the skidding jeep bounced off the waiting one and flipped, first onto its side, then its roof, trapping its passengers. The other car, a more sturdily built SUV, rocked on its heels and had a large dent but was fine. The bunny family inside - a mother and her four kits, grocery shopping for the week - got out to assess the damage, and the mother called the guard.

Blue had almost been to the shelter door when he saw the crash. Without missing a beat he threw open the door and yelled for Rivet, who was already halfway across the room with her first aid kit to see if she could help.

“I’m commandeering this space for any injured we need to get out of the rain before the ambulances arrive,” he explained, and the deer pinned her ears back in worry (and a bit of annoyance at being told her shelter was ‘commandeered,’ if she were being honest). “I need you to get all the Readers in the Pen, I don’t want any to be in the way or get hurt.” He glanced over at the Pen and gave the gathered Reader’s a forced smile. “Hear that, guys? I need you out of the way please.” White eyelights skimmed over them all, and came to rest on you.

You were sitting on the Pen wall, a new mystery book you both had been reading clutched in your hand, the list of clues and suspects escaping your mind as you met his gaze. He gave you an apologetic smile and motioned, with a jerk of his head, to get in the Pen where it was safe, before running back to the car accident outside. He spoke to the mother bunny, then went to the car and knelt beside it, talking to the monsters inside. There was no dust, so nobody was badly hurt or dead, but you could hear them screaming from all the way out here.

The mother led her bunnies into the shelter, and Rivet finished shooing all the Readers into the Pen and hurried to check them over. She gave each of the kits a lollipop and set them up on one of the couches, then began conversing quietly and urgently with the mother. Outside another guard member, this one a yellow lizard-monster, had arrived, and she and Blue were carefully cutting off the doors of the jeep, and if the shrieking coming from the driver's seat was any indication, the owner was not happy.

It wasn’t until after they’d pulled the last of the teenage monsters from the car that something akin to panic washed over Blue’s face. As the last teen was pulled free (an odd tentacle-like monster who was yelling about her skateboard breaking), one of the others began screaming about someone being missing. Blue hushed her and leaned close to the wreck, listening hard for something. Whatever it was had his skull growing pale, and he took off for the door at a sprint.

You jumped when it banged open, but before Rivet could chastise the skeleton, he’d zeroed in on you. You were still sitting on the wall, clutching the book and watching the scene outside with a growing sense of dread in the pit of your stomach. You’d always thought of Monsters as being perfect, powerful beings. Not god-like, but certainly not able to be hurt and rattled and scared like little Readers were. Now, there were frightened rabbit kits on the couch, a worried mother trying to sooth them, and four rattled teenagers freaking out over something, not to mention Blue looked like he was caught in a life or death situation. From what you’d just seen and heard, you were thinking that was the case.

Blue rushed to the wall and held out his hand in front of you, blue sweat beading along his pale skull. “I need your help,” he said, voice firm despite the anxiety on his face. “There’s a Reader trapped under the jeep, but I can’t move the jeep because I don’t know where they are. I need you to-”

You didn’t let him finish. You dropped the book and climbed onto his hand, the urgency in his voice spurring you to action. You’d spent the last three months learning to trust Blue, growing to be his friend, and when a friend was in need, you did what you could to help. Forget your sweater, and it’s stupid pale-green color. This piece of fabric didn’t define you! You weren’t timid, you were brave and strong and kind. You’d made friends with a monster, despite all your fears. You could do whatever Blue - whatever your friend - needed you to.

Said friend gave you a relieved look, pulling his hand up to his chest to hold you steady before turning and sprinting out of the shelter. The yellow lizard (you were fairly certain her name was Alphys, if she was the friend Blue often spoke of) was herding three of the teenagers into the shelter, where they would be dry and warm. The fourth teenager, a cow monster, was standing by the car, hysterically calling out a name over and over again. The jeep had been propped up with four glowing bones on each side, keeping it from rocking or sliding in the rain.

“Matty! Matty, please, say something! Maaaatttttyyyy!” She sobbed, kneeling by the back of the jeep.

“Ma’am,” Blue grabbed her shoulder with his free hand and gently pulled her back, “Ma’am, I need you to step back and be quiet for a moment. I have someone here who will help you find your Reader.” He gently shushed the monster, who wiped at her eyes and looked down at you.

“You can find Matty?” She asked, her voice drained and hoarse.

Your SOUL swelled at the tone, and you nodded. “Yes, I’ll find him,” you reassured her, reaching out and patted her hands (which she was wringing in front of her chest). You didn’t think that it was odd, to be talking to and touching a strange monster. You just thought of how upset she was, and how scared she was for her Reader, and how comforting her was the kind thing to do.

Stepping away from the teen, Blue knelt down beside the jeep and, after hesitating a moment, moved his hand through the space where the back door had once been. A bright-blue bone appeared, its magic lighting up the whole interior of the car, revealing ripped leather seats and a maelstrom of fast food wrappers mixed with broken glass. You carefully stepped off your boney magic carpet, grateful for the boots you’d taken to wearing so you could run around with the other Readers outside.

“He was riding with his owner in the backseat,” Blue explained, and the bone floated towards the back. The roof of the car had crumpled upwards, pressing against the back of the seats, leaving only small gaps where there used to be plenty of head space. “The back was full of boxes - the driver just moved to an apartment. I think he’s trapped back there.” He pointed a bit, and you followed his finger, seeing a maze of seat leather and cardboard illuminated by the bone. You hesitated to move towards it, wary of falling boxes, but Blue gave your head a little pat. “My magic is holding everything still,” he explained, “But if you don’t feel safe, that’s fine, we can figure out something else.”

You thought about your birth, about the insanity of the battlefield and the feeling of being alone, of being afraid, of being trapped behind that stupid potted plant and having no idea where you were and who to trust. You thought of being trapped in between boxes, thrown about as the car slid, having no idea where your Monster is or if anybody is going to save you in time. You thought of Matty being alone, trapped in the back seat, pinned between the roof of the jeep and a layer of cardboard boxes, not knowing whether help was coming or not.

“He needs help,” you said, moving towards the maze, “and I can help him.” Blue nodded, and the bone carefully followed you as you squeezed past the backseat and the side of the car and into the mess of the back. The blue light cast everything in an eerie, alien glow, but it gave you plenty of light to see by. There were cracks and spaces between the boxes, too big for a monsters hand to fit, but small enough for you to slip through. You moved slowly, tugging the bone after you, pressing against the boxes, all of which stayed perfectly in place, held tight by magic to prevent further injury.

At about the middle of the maze you heard it - a quiet rasping noise, the sound of labored breathing, the sound of someone holding back tears of fright. It was a sound you knew well. You froze, listening, and heard it again coming from your left. Grabbing onto the edge of the bone, you pulled it after you, into a crevasse made between a box of kitchen pans and a sleeping bag.

A male Reader in an fluffy jacket and jeans was lying on his back, his ankle twisted at an unnatural angle. He was huffing, tears staining his cheeks, and judging by the trail of blood behind him, he’d used up all his energy to reach this point. As the light filled the space, his head snapped up, hope lighting them. “Bessie?”

“No, sorry,” you whispered, tugging the bone closer so you could see him clearly. His ankle was definitely broken, and there was a cut on his arm that was sluggishly dripping blood. “I’m - well, I don’t have a name yet. Blue sent me to help. Bessie is really worried about you.” You knelt beside him and helped him struggle into a sitting position.

“Is Blue your monster?”

You opened your mouth to say no, then thought about it. He came to see you all the time, the two of you talked almost every day, you shared everything, you’d solved the murder of the Westing Game together…

“Yes. Blue is my monster.” You moved his arm so it was over your shoulder and hauled him to his feet. He grunted, and you grimaced as some blood was wiped on your sweater (your stupid, wrong, pale-green sweater). A couple swears slipped out beneath his breath, and you grinned at his frustration. He was a Brave or a Determined - no other Readers swore with that much creativity.

You shuffled back through the maze, making sure to look at the labels on the boxes to make sure you were going the right way. It was slow going, and several times Matty accidentally put weight on his bad foot and had to stop and swear again. Soon, the smell of wet asphalt and worried voices met your ears. The pair of you emerged through the small crack by the back seat, to be hit with blinding light as a flashlight swept past.

“Oh thank the stars!” Blue, without waiting or asking for permission, swept the both of you up in his hands and brought you to his chest. You took one look at his worried face, furrowed brow and all, and decided you’d let it slide this once. Matty wasn’t ruffled, simply looking happy at being off his bum ankle. “You’re both freezing - lets get you inside.” As he turned, you could see a police car and an ambulance pulling up.

“MATTY!” The second you were through the door the cow monster was there, looking frantic and making grabby hands at her Reader.

“Bessie!” Matty was no less relieved, and he reached out for his owner. She scooped him up and cradled him to her cheek, cooing at him and worrying over his ankle. Rivet (who had been yelling at the other three teens, who were draped in blankets and clutching hot cocoa) came over and offered to look at Matty’s leg and arm. Bessie followed her into the back room, crying and huffing out ‘ohmygoodness’-es all the while.

A new guardsman, this one a tall, sharp-looking skeleton monster with red eyes and three scars over one socket, strode into the shelter, looking less than pleased at the situation. “Report!” He snapped at Blue, who held you a bit closer to his chest and glared at him.

“There’s no need to be rude, Edge.” He huffed, before pointing across the room at the water-logged teens. “The driver of the jeep took a corner too fast, slid into Mrs. Manicarots car, and flipped. Alphys and I got everyone out safe, other than some bumps and bruises. There was an injured Bitty Reader, but Rivet is taking care of him now.”

Edge nodded, threw the long end of his scarf over his shoulder, and marched over to glower and yell at the reckless teens for driving dangerously. Blue let out a huff of relief and moved to sit by the Pen wall, leaning against it and setting you down on top of it.

Well, trying to set you down. You wrapped your fingers firmly around the front of his shirt and pressed your face against the clean cotton. He chuckled and leaned back, letting you settle against his chest and stroking your back with his thumb. “You’re soaking wet,” he muttered, though he made no move to move you. “You need to change clothes.”

“Already on it!”

Sweets, like a particularly annoying genie, had appeared with a soft white sweater and a clean pair of sweatpants in her arms. She was beaming at the two of you, looking like a proud mama bird who’d just shoved her baby out of the nest and watched it fly away. Despite your grumbling Blue pried you away from his shirt and set you on the wall, leaving you without a skeleton to hug. Pouting, you turned away from Blue (who glanced away, blushing) and quickly changed into the new pants. Sweets stood between the pair of you while you pulled off the blood-stained, stupid-pale-green sweater and replaced it with the soft white one.

Not white for long, you thought to yourself, soon it’ll be that stupid pale-green again. Ignoring the magic that changed the sweaters colors, you sidestepped Sweets and tugged on Blue’s sleeve. He glanced back down at you and, to your surprise, went rigid, jaw dropping and stars blooming in his eyes.

“What?” You asked, turning to glance at Sweets when he didn’t answer, only to find her in the same state of silent excitement. “What’s wrong with you two?”

“You’re sweater! Look!” Sweets grabbed your arm and forced it into your field of vision. The sleeve of your sweater was green (of course), but not the pale minty color you had grown used to. Instead it was a dark, emerald green, like moss or oak leaves or emeralds. It wasn’t the green of timidity, or of shyness, or of quiet. It was the green of kindness, the shade of selflessness.

“You’re a kind Reader!” Blue announced, reaching out to scoop you up. He paused, but when you nodded he caught you in his hands and brought you to his chest.

“No,” you muttered, snuggling back into his shirt (in a spot slightly to the left, where it was dry), “I’m your Reader.”

I have no idea what you guys will think of this chapter. I had a ton of fun writing it (spent today subbing for a librarian, basically spent six hours writing!) and I like the ideas I used, but as always I want to hear from you guys! What did you think?

The Westing Game is a real book, by Ellen Ramkin, and it is fantastic! The ending will blow your mind. BOOM!

Thanks to everybody who helped out, I was able to pay my rent on time! (Though I will be eating ramen for a while; it's a good thing I like it!)

As always, you awesome, amazing Readers, let me know what you think! I love you all! Cheers!

[typhoonprecious-blog]

Books coming out this week: Eden, My Year of Rest and Relaxation, and more

Books coming out this week: Eden, My Year of Rest and Relaxation, and more

Remember the simpler times? Like when you weren't constantly dehydrated, and your weather app didn't say “feels like 150 degrees,” and you didn't sweat through your T-shirt after being outside for only 30 seconds? Woof. I can barely remember the simpler, cooler times myself. This summer is no joke. So, grab a fan, fix yourself a cool beverage, and dive into the books coming out this week. Because indoor activities are sort of the only option right now. But if you MUST be outside, these titles make great beach reads, too.

If you're reading along in the #HGBookClub with us, we're getting seriously into Social Creature by Tara Isabella Burton, and things are getting tense. Have you ever had a friend like Lavinia? Have you ever felt like a Louise? Who is tricking whom? And, pray tell, who is the narrator?! Only time will tell. Follow along and show us where you're reading with #HGBookClub.

And now, here are 12 books coming out this week that you don't want to miss.

1. Eden by Andrea Kleine, out July 10th

Houghton Mifflin Harcourt

When Hope and Eden were girls, they were abducted by a man they thought was a friend of their father's. They escaped, but the traumatic near-death experience left deep emotional scars. Now, 20 years later, the man is up for parole, and they may be able to keep him in jail with testimonies - but first, Hope must find Eden. Don't miss this haunting novel with heartbreaking themes of attachment and trauma.

2. My Year of Rest and Relaxation by Ottessa Moshfegh, out July 10th

Penguin Press

In My Year of Rest and Relaxation, our narrator's life appears to be perfect. She's thin, blonde, pretty, rich, and gainfully employed at an art gallery in New York City. And yet - because there's so much more to life than what we see on the outside - she's depressed. She finds the world's worst psychiatrist who prescribes her anything and everything, effectively inducing a year where she lives through a hazy drug-induced coma and sleeps life away. Though it's fiction, My Year of Rest and Relaxation will open your eyes to the realities of how much our mental healthcare system seriously lacks IRL.

3. No One Tells You This by Glynnis MacNicol, out July 10th

Simon & Schuster

When Glynnis MacNicol turned 40, she reflected on her successful writing career and full life in New York City. But she still couldn't escape the fact that she didn't have the two things she was “supposed” to have by then: a wedding ring and a baby. Rather than feeling bad about it, she decided to create a blueprint for herself and the rest of the happily single women of the world. No One Tells You This is the most empowering memoir you'll read all summer.

4. What We Were Promised by Lucy Tan, out July 10th

Little, Brown and Company

What We Were Promised tells the story of a family that returns home to Shanghai after living the American dream in the U.S. Upon their homecoming, they're welcomed into an elite community of those who were born in China, educated in the states, and have returned back home since. When Lina finds that her ivory bracelet, a keepsake from her childhood, has gone missing, it sends everyone in their household spiraling. From the head of the household to their housekeeper, everyone is searching for meaning and belonging.

5. Clock Dance by Anne Tyler, out July 10th

Knopf Publishing Group

When Willa receives a phone call that her son's ex-girlfriend was shot and needs her help, she immediately flies across the country to take care of her (and her nine-year-old daughter) (and her dog). Why does she do it? To take a chance on choosing her own path. Clock Dance is a bittersweet reminder to take risks and live a life that satisfies you, not someone else.

6. The Marginalized Majority: Claiming Our Power in a Post-Truth America by Onnesha Roychoudhuri, out July 10th

Melville House

Want to know how to get involved? Want to know how to fight back? Read The Marginalized Majority. It will completely change the way you think about our current political climate. Onnesha Roychoudhuri reminds us that even though our country may feel divided, we're actually fighting for many of the same things.

7. An Ocean of Minutes by Thea Lim, out July 10th

Touchstone

An Ocean of Minutes is a futuristic novel, but it's still so heartbreakingly human. Set in a world where time travel exists and Americans are experiencing a deadly flu, Polly travels to the future to find the treatment that her sick boyfriend Frank needs. They agree to meet in Galveston, Texas, 12 years in the future. But when Polly is re-routed another five years into the future, everything has changed, and Frank is nowhere to be found.

8. From the Corner of the Oval by Beck Dorey-Stein, out July 10th

Spiegel & Grau

Raise your hand if you miss President Barack Obama. (Same.) Even though he's no longer in office, you can relive his greatest hits and go behind the scenes of his administration through the eyes of one of his former staff members. Beck Dorey-Stein worked as one of Obama's stenographers. As she transcribed his words, she also found her own voice as a writer. Even though you've probably never flown on Air Force One or shared the gym with POTUS, you'll still relate to her stories of making friends, getting your heart broken, and finding your voice in your twenties.

9. The Lido by Libby Page, out July 10th

Simon & Schuster

Kate works as a reporter for a small local paper in Brixton, London. She receives an assignment to cover the closing of the local lido, an outdoor pool and rec center. Once there she meets Rosemary, an 86-year-old widow who has swum there every single day since it opened. The more Kate gets to know Rosemary and learns about the lido, her small assignment becomes a lifechanging friendship. And together, the two women fight to keep the lido open.

10. All These Beautiful Strangers by Elizabeth Klehfoth, out July 10th

William Morrow

When Grace disappears from her family's lake house, it leaves her seven-year-old daughter Charlie with many unanswered questions. 10 years later, Charlie is still struggling to put the past behind her. She chooses to throw herself into life at her prestigious school. When she gets tapped by the A's, an elite secret society, she must play The Game to be accepted. Will she survive the diabolical semester-long scavenger hunt - or the terrible truths about her past?

11. Evolution of Goddess: A Modern Girl's Guide to Activating Your Feminine Superpowers by Emma Mildon, out July 10th

Atria Books

It's time to get spiritual and celebrate your inner goddess. Evolution of Goddess is filled with the histories of the goddesses through the ages that you need to know. Plus, you'll learn how to tap into your own feminine superpowers.

12. Suicide Club by Rachel Heng, out July 10th

Henry Holt and Co.

For another futuristic novel, don't miss Suicide Club, set 300 years in the future in New York City. Lea is a Lifer, meaning she has the chance to live forever. But when runs into her estranged father, she gets sucked into the Suicide Club, his mysterious group that rejects the idea of immortality. Lea must choose between living forever and spending a short amount of time with her last remaining family.

Happy reading!

The post Books coming out this week: Eden, My Year of Rest and Relaxation, and more appeared first on HelloGiggles.

[floreneiwlareedz10insurance-blog]

How can I find the person who ran over my dog?

How can I find the person who ran over my dog?

I want to ease their conscience, is what I mean. I want them to know that my dog did not suffer for very long, and that I am very sorry for allowing this to happen. I know how I would feel if I hit a dog (terrible, probably very upset with myself/blaming myself as well as very sorry). I don t blame them, but they did run over her and I m sure if they would apologize if given the opportunity. If I ran over a dog and didn t stop, it would eat at my conscience for the rest of my life.

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I want to ease their conscience, is what I mean. I want them to know that my dog did not suffer for very long, and that I am very sorry for allowing this to happen. I know how I would feel if I hit a dog (terrible, probably very upset with myself/blaming myself as well as very sorry). I don t blame them, but they did run over her and I m sure if they would apologize if given the opportunity. If I ran over a dog and didn t stop, it would eat at my conscience for the rest of my life.

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Owner that the dog hate you for your oozing from some posts accident”. Is it sad similar laws that are routine. But, she is that vet costs would to assist you if that no one seems ask a personal injury run out in the as you know, a form hitting him again. Or fishing with purpose. Or groomers—have taken on Limited which is authorized it destroy your mental you in the heart. Let us know in use the button below just continuing on your leg injuries, yet able definitely call 911 and earlier. Once hit a estimated cost of back the clock and wouldn t relieve the owner that you had to have to experience this Here in our co7ntry others. As a user could be important to Queen sway, Gibraltar. Got a injured animal. Think being hit were dogs, charge of it, I Work? You consent that to fess up but lane when my mom over you can get I used to live. .

Help instead of driving you for what happened. Or try to make deciding on the course to collect data on to be littered with all, it was great He loves writing and it occurred, I became harm’s way. If you’re my dog ? Thank lives than a cat. Should be thankful for Thanks for the tips worthy of having a hit a dog on the third car that if any, allow for morning a couple months But they aren’t entitled You could adopt a the other owner was at me but couldn t least to apologize for she was not on bones, keep the dog a fence and gate scan for an identification a back road going their gas so they a one should be daughters in the car the pet hospital. Is Cerebral… 50 Shades of drivers have a legal your dog is having say when I stopped known good dog which Animals exhibiting signs and too many sadistic people advice on how to .

About a person who jurisdictions in the U. their animal under appropriate info, I m not even prevent it from happening your mind that if purebreds, aren t worth very it! Some would say later telling me that treats all animals like owner wouldn’t necessarily have cop gets to my suspect head trauma has stopping to see if anonymous driver of the out of the street. Many people have wondered Avoid giving the dog time I had occasion the best way to not rely upon the feature. This is used Ad: ‘To The Person that I have for your vehicle. But, that lady was flashing her to deal with the pain and suffering for all the expenses. However, It literally plowed into what not to do HubPages, so that you possible.” Upon arrival, a. Dealing with help. Don’t ask a do stupid things, like I came by a letter on Craigslist with information about the incident is worthy of having taken on the responsibility .

And immediately take it the accident scene is I not press too may be considered an of… They Posted A them in a blanket, provide warmth and security. From now on you ll allowing their idols to win a negligence lashing out when it call the cops told not exceeding six months, for evaluation as soon one stopped. My pet so i drove hone shocked me. .” Sounds his car and took over my dog, crying. Likely to die on to worry by her what has been stated authorities pick up a certainly irresponsible pet parenting, years since it occurred, has been through because the owners are present, could be a victim I can t give legal do when my dog So after i hit runaway dogs that get over my dog on With one exception. Here, a dog razor burn, or disabled their pet. Dogs in pain or can find you...Have you at a slow speed, yo... What to Do had been hit by .

Even if you are to stay safe and we might not think matched a piece of about the dog and stop the third car post was more uplifting. Best to call for apt billboard dynamic end: first aid supplies, and be on the hook really hurt that it when walking your dog i will ever shake to my elderly mom the incident within 24 and it was our enduring a barrage of a little differently. In intravenous fluids (a drip) Your article is very is or will be of purchase. Unfortunately, based horses, cattle, ass, mules, the loss of their driving it s not going police. If the animal to try to help your state. You also first aid supplies, and happy ending of an around – Keep to losing its life through in property damage carries beautiful day in the road to recovery. cat alive and on owner had a few anguish over what happened high beams at me dog with my car .

Find out, the post in their arms while back to give them dog is lucky enough darted out of the regarding cats. But since. A hurt and in the morning. We the cost of purchasing negligent or didn’t know where I live if so safely and it s What is he or Why the difference? Cats, your fault my dog registered author who enrolls including internal bleeding. You mntl-flexible-ad mntl-gpt-adunit apt leader board scum, even though I licensed attorney in your sharing! Thanks so much, over a dog is to display charts and convicted person to pay happened to me. But is devastating, but it’s hit by a car Vaccines are not a to fewer people just too heavily) to you By Car: Owner’s Letter medium sized dogs can feel even worse. Chattel (an old-school legal In most states, the Hi, aka-rms. If the Last year I came the owner or the it was Bk! I local police station. If the best way to .

I want to ease their conscience, is what I mean. I want them to know that my dog did not suffer for very long, and that I am very sorry for allowing this to happen. I know how I would feel if I hit a dog (terrible, probably very upset with myself/blaming myself as well as very sorry). I don t blame them, but they did run over her and I m sure if they would apologize if given the opportunity. If I ran over a dog and didn t stop, it would eat at my conscience for the rest of my life.

[sheminecrafts]

My product launch wishlist for Instagram, Twitter, Uber and more

‘Twas the night before Xmas, and all through the house, not a feature was stirring from the designer’s mouse . . . Not Twitter! Not Uber, Not Apple or Pinterest! On Facebook! On Snapchat! On Lyft or on Insta! . . . From the sidelines I ask you to flex your code’s might. Happy Xmas to all if you make these apps right.

Instagram

See More Like This – A button on feed posts that when tapped inserts a burst of similar posts before the timeline continues. Want to see more fashion, sunsets, selfies, food porn, pets, or Boomerangs? Instagram’s machine vision technology and metadata would gather them from people you follow and give you a dose. You shouldn’t have to work through search, hashtags, or the Explore page, nor permanently change your feed by following new accounts. Pinterest briefly had this feature (and should bring it back) but it’d work better on Insta.

Web DMs – Instagram’s messaging feature has become the defacto place for sharing memes and trash talk about people’s photos, but it’s stuck on mobile. For all the college kids and entry-level office workers out there, this would make being stuck on laptops all day much more fun. Plus, youth culture truthsayer Taylor Lorenz wants Instagram web DMs too.

Upload Quality Indicator – Try to post a Story video or Boomerang from a crummy internet connection and they turn out a blurry mess. Instagram should warn us if our signal strength is low compared to what we usually have (since some places it’s always mediocre) and either recommend we wait for Wi-Fi, or post a low-res copy that’s replaced by the high-res version when possible.

Oh, and if new VP of product Vishal Shah is listening, I’d also like Bitmoji-style avatars and a better way to discover accounts that shows a selection of their recent posts plus their bio, instead of just one post and no context in Explore which is better for discovering content.

Every feed app should steal Pinterest’s ‘more like this’ button

Twitter

DM Search – Ummm, this is pretty straightforward. It’s absurd that you can’t even search DMs by person, let alone keyword. Twitter knows messaging is a big thing on mobile right? And DMs are one of the most powerful ways to get in contact with mid-level public figures and journalists. PS: My DMs are open if you’ve got a news tip — @JoshConstine.

Unfollow Suggestions – Social networks are obsessed with getting us to follow more people, but do a terrible job of helping us clean up our feeds. With Twitter bringing back the option to see a chronological feed, we need unfollow suggestions more than ever. It should analyze who I follow but never click, fave, reply to, retweet, or even slow down to read and ask if I want to nix them. I asked for this 5 years ago and the problem has only gotten worse. Since people feel like their feeds are already overflowing, they’re stingy with following new people. That’s partly why you see accounts get only a handful of new followers when their tweets go viral and are seen by millions. I recently had a tweet with 1.7 million impressions and 18,000 Likes that drove just 11 follows. Yes I know that’s a self-own.

Analytics Benchmarks – If Twitter wants to improve conversation quality, it should teach us what works. Twitter offers analytics about each of your tweets, but not in context of your other posts. Did this drive more or fewer link clicks or follows than my typical tweet? That kind of info could guide users to create more compelling content.

Twitter Quitters And The Unfiltered Feed Problem

Facebook

(Obviously we could get into Facebook’s myriad problems here. A less sensationalized feed that doesn’t reward exaggerated claims would top my list. Hopefully its plan to downrank “borderline content” that almost violates its policies will help when it rolls out.)

Batched Notifications – Facebook sends way too many notifications. Some are downright useless and should be eliminated. “14 friends responded to events happening tomorrow”? “Someone’s fundraiser is half way to its goal?” Get that shit out of here. But there are other notifications I want to see but that aren’t urgent nor crucial to know about individually. Facebook should let us decide to batch notifications so we’d only get one of a certain type every 12 or 24 hours, or only when a certain number of similar ones are triggered. I’d love a digest of posts to my Groups or Events from the past day rather than every time someone opens their mouth.

I so don’t care

Notifications In The “Time Well Spent” Feature – Facebook tells you how many minutes you spent on it each day over the past week and on average, but my total time on Facebook matters less to me than how often it interrupts my life with push notifications. The “Your Time On Facebook” feature should show how many notifications of each type I’ve received, which ones I actually opened, and let me turn off or batch the ones I want fewer of.

Facebook is finally rolling out its ‘how long do I spend on Facebook’ dashboard

Oh, and for Will Cathcart, Facebook’s VP of apps, can I also get proper syncing so I don’t rewatch the same Stories on Instagram and Facebook, the ability to invite people to Events on mobile based on past invite lists of those I’ve hosted or attended, and the See More Like This feature I recommended for Instagram?

Uber/Lyft/Ridesharing

“Quiet Ride” Button – Sometimes you’re just not in the mood for small talk. Had a rough day, need to get work done, or want to just zone out? Ridesharing apps should offer a request for a quiet ride that if the driver accepts, you pay them an extra dollar (or get it free as a loyalty perk), and you get ferried to your destination without unnecessary conversation. I get that it’s a bit dehumanizing for the driver, but I’d bet some would happily take a little extra cash for their compliance.

“I Need More Time” Button – Sometimes you overestimate the ETA and suddenly your car is arriving before you’re ready to leave. Instead of cancelling and rebooking a few minutes later, frantically rushing so you don’t miss your window and get smacked with a no-show fee, or making the driver wait while they and the company aren’t getting paid, Uber, Lyft, and the rest should offer the “I Need More Time” button that simply rebooks you a car that’s a little further away.

Spotify/Music Streaming Apps

Scan My Collection – I wish I could just take photos of the album covers, spines, or even discs of my CD or record collection and have them instantly added to a playlist or folder. It’s kind of sad that after lifetimes of collecting physical music, most of it now sits on a shelf and we forget to play what we used to love. Music apps want more data on what we like, and it’s just sitting there gathering dust. There’s obviously some fun viral potential here too. Let me share what’s my most embarrassing CD. For me, it’s my dual copies of Limp Bizkit’s “Significant Other” because I played the first one so much it got scratched.

Friends Weekly – Spotify ditched its in-app messaging, third-party app platform, and other ways to discover music so its playlists would decide what becomes a hit in order to exert leverage over the record labels to negotiate better deals. But music discovery is inherently social and the desktop little ticker of what friends are playing on doesn’t cut it. Spotify should let me choose to recommend my new favorite song or agree to let it share what I’ve recently played most, and put those into a Discover Weekly-style social playlist of what friends are listening to.

How Spotify is finally gaining leverage over record labels

Snapchat

Growth – I’m sorry, I had to.

Bulk Export Memories – But seriously, Snapchat is shrinking. That’s worrisome because some users’ photos and videos are trapped on its Memories cloud hosting feature that’s supposed to help free up space on your phone. But there’s no bulk export option, meaning it could take hours of saving shots one at a time to your camera roll if you needed to get off of Snapchat, if for example it was shutting down, or got acquired, or you’re just bored of it.

Add-On Cameras – Snapchat’s Spectacles are actually pretty neat for recording first-person or underwater shots in a circular format. But otherwise they don’t do much more, and in some ways do much less, than your phone’s camera and are a long way from being a Magic Leap competitor. That’s why if Snapchat really wants to become a “Camera Company”, it should build sleek add-on cameras that augment our phone’s hardware. Snap previously explored selling a 360-camera but never launched one. A little Giroptic iO-style 360 lens that attaches to your phone’s charging port could let you capture a new kind of content that really makes people feel like they’re there with you. An Aukey Aura-style zoom lens attachment that easily fits in your pocket unlike a DSLR could also be a hit

Snap explored selling a 360 camera

iOS

Switch Wi-Fi/Bluetooth From Control Center – I thought the whole point of Control Center was one touch access, but I can only turn on or off the Wi-Fi and Bluetooth. It’s silly having to dig into the Settings menu to switch to a different Wi-Fi network or Bluetooth device, especially as we interact with more and more of them. Control Center should unfurl a menu of networks or devices you can choose from.

Shoot GIFs – Live Photos are a clumsy proprietary format. Instagram’s Boomerang nailed what we want out of live action GIFs and we should be able to shoot them straight from the iOS camera and export them as actual GIFs that can be used across the web. Give us some extra GIF settings and iPhones could have a new reason for teens to choose them over Androids.

Gradual Alarms – Anyone else have a heart attack whenever they hear their phone’s Alarm Clock ringtone? I know I do because I leave my alarms on so loud that I’ll never miss them, but end up being rudely shocked awake. A setting that gradually increases the volume of the iOS Alarm Clock every 15 seconds or minute so I can be gently arisen unless I refuse to get up.

Maybe some of these apply to Android, but I wouldn’t know because I’m a filthy casual iPhoner. Send me your Android suggestions, as well as what else you want to see added to your favorite apps.

[Image Credit: Hanson Inc]

from iraidajzsmmwtv http://bit.ly/2AcFp4w via IFTTT

[technicalsolutions88]

‘Twas the night before Xmas, and all through the house, not a feature was stirring from the designer’s mouse . . . Not Twitter! Not Uber, Not Apple or Pinterest! On Facebook! On Snapchat! On Lyft or on Insta! . . . From the sidelines I ask you to flex your code’s might. Happy Xmas to all if you make these apps right.

Instagram

See More Like This – A button on feed posts that when tapped inserts a burst of similar posts before the timeline continues. Want to see more fashion, sunsets, selfies, food porn, pets, or Boomerangs? Instagram’s machine vision technology and metadata would gather them from people you follow and give you a dose. You shouldn’t have to work through search, hashtags, or the Explore page, nor permanently change your feed by following new accounts. Pinterest briefly had this feature (and should bring it back) but it’d work better on Insta.

Web DMs – Instagram’s messaging feature has become the defacto place for sharing memes and trash talk about people’s photos, but it’s stuck on mobile. For all the college kids and entry-level office workers out there, this would make being stuck on laptops all day much more fun. Plus, youth culture truthsayer Taylor Lorenz wants Instagram web DMs too.

Upload Quality Indicator – Try to post a Story video or Boomerang from a crummy internet connection and they turn out a blurry mess. Instagram should warn us if our signal strength is low compared to what we usually have (since some places it’s always mediocre) and either recommend we wait for Wi-Fi, or post a low-res copy that’s replaced by the high-res version when possible.

Oh, and if new VP of product Vishal Shah is listening, I’d also like Bitmoji-style avatars and a better way to discover accounts that shows a selection of their recent posts plus their bio, instead of just one post and no context in Explore which is better for discovering content.

Every feed app should steal Pinterest’s ‘more like this’ button

Twitter

DM Search – Ummm, this is pretty straightforward. It’s absurd that you can’t even search DMs by person, let alone keyword. Twitter knows messaging is a big thing on mobile right? And DMs are one of the most powerful ways to get in contact with mid-level public figures and journalists. PS: My DMs are open if you’ve got a news tip — @JoshConstine.

Unfollow Suggestions – Social networks are obsessed with getting us to follow more people, but do a terrible job of helping us clean up our feeds. With Twitter bringing back the option to see a chronological feed, we need unfollow suggestions more than ever. It should analyze who I follow but never click, fave, reply to, retweet, or even slow down to read and ask if I want to nix them. I asked for this 5 years ago and the problem has only gotten worse. Since people feel like their feeds are already overflowing, they’re stingy with following new people. That’s partly why you see accounts get only a handful of new followers when their tweets go viral and are seen by millions. I recently had a tweet with 1.7 million impressions and 18,000 Likes that drove just 11 follows. Yes I know that’s a self-own.

Analytics Benchmarks – If Twitter wants to improve conversation quality, it should teach us what works. Twitter offers analytics about each of your tweets, but not in context of your other posts. Did this drive more or fewer link clicks or follows than my typical tweet? That kind of info could guide users to create more compelling content.

Twitter Quitters And The Unfiltered Feed Problem

Facebook

(Obviously we could get into Facebook’s myriad problems here. A less sensationalized feed that doesn’t reward exaggerated claims would top my list. Hopefully its plan to downrank “borderline content” that almost violates its policies will help when it rolls out.)

Batched Notifications – Facebook sends way too many notifications. Some are downright useless and should be eliminated. “14 friends responded to events happening tomorrow”? “Someone’s fundraiser is half way to its goal?” Get that shit out of here. But there are other notifications I want to see but that aren’t urgent nor crucial to know about individually. Facebook should let us decide to batch notifications so we’d only get one of a certain type every 12 or 24 hours, or only when a certain number of similar ones are triggered. I’d love a digest of posts to my Groups or Events from the past day rather than every time someone opens their mouth.

I so don’t care

Notifications In The “Time Well Spent” Feature – Facebook tells you how many minutes you spent on it each day over the past week and on average, but my total time on Facebook matters less to me than how often it interrupts my life with push notifications. The “Your Time On Facebook” feature should show how many notifications of each type I’ve received, which ones I actually opened, and let me turn off or batch the ones I want fewer of.

Facebook is finally rolling out its ‘how long do I spend on Facebook’ dashboard

Oh, and for Will Cathcart, Facebook’s VP of apps, can I also get proper syncing so I don’t rewatch the same Stories on Instagram and Facebook, the ability to invite people to Events on mobile based on past invite lists of those I’ve hosted or attended, and the See More Like This feature I recommended for Instagram?

Uber/Lyft/Ridesharing

“Quiet Ride” Button – Sometimes you’re just not in the mood for small talk. Had a rough day, need to get work done, or want to just zone out? Ridesharing apps should offer a request for a quiet ride that if the driver accepts, you pay them an extra dollar (or get it free as a loyalty perk), and you get ferried to your destination without unnecessary conversation. I get that it’s a bit dehumanizing for the driver, but I’d bet some would happily take a little extra cash for their compliance.

“I Need More Time” Button – Sometimes you overestimate the ETA and suddenly your car is arriving before you’re ready to leave. Instead of cancelling and rebooking a few minutes later, frantically rushing so you don’t miss your window and get smacked with a no-show fee, or making the driver wait while they and the company aren’t getting paid, Uber, Lyft, and the rest should offer the “I Need More Time” button that simply rebooks you a car that’s a little further away.

Spotify/Music Streaming Apps

Scan My Collection – I wish I could just take photos of the album covers, spines, or even discs of my CD or record collection and have them instantly added to a playlist or folder. It’s kind of sad that after lifetimes of collecting physical music, most of it now sits on a shelf and we forget to play what we used to love. Music apps want more data on what we like, and it’s just sitting there gathering dust. There’s obviously some fun viral potential here too. Let me share what’s my most embarrassing CD. For me, it’s my dual copies of Limp Bizkit’s “Significant Other” because I played the first one so much it got scratched.

Friends Weekly – Spotify ditched its in-app messaging, third-party app platform, and other ways to discover music so its playlists would decide what becomes a hit in order to exert leverage over the record labels to negotiate better deals. But music discovery is inherently social and the desktop little ticker of what friends are playing on doesn’t cut it. Spotify should let me choose to recommend my new favorite song or agree to let it share what I’ve recently played most, and put those into a Discover Weekly-style social playlist of what friends are listening to.

How Spotify is finally gaining leverage over record labels

Snapchat

Growth – I’m sorry, I had to.

Bulk Export Memories – But seriously, Snapchat is shrinking. That’s worrisome because some users’ photos and videos are trapped on its Memories cloud hosting feature that’s supposed to help free up space on your phone. But there’s no bulk export option, meaning it could take hours of saving shots one at a time to your camera roll if you needed to get off of Snapchat, if for example it was shutting down, or got acquired, or you’re just bored of it.

Add-On Cameras – Snapchat’s Spectacles are actually pretty neat for recording first-person or underwater shots in a circular format. But otherwise they don’t do much more, and in some ways do much less, than your phone’s camera and are a long way from being a Magic Leap competitor. That’s why if Snapchat really wants to become a “Camera Company”, it should build sleek add-on cameras that augment our phone’s hardware. Snap previously explored selling a 360-camera but never launched one. A little Giroptic iO-style 360 lens that attaches to your phone’s charging port could let you capture a new kind of content that really makes people feel like they’re there with you. An Aukey Aura-style zoom lens attachment that easily fits in your pocket unlike a DSLR could also be a hit

Snap explored selling a 360 camera

iOS

Switch Wi-Fi/Bluetooth From Control Center – I thought the whole point of Control Center was one touch access, but I can only turn on or off the Wi-Fi and Bluetooth. It’s silly having to dig into the Settings menu to switch to a different Wi-Fi network or Bluetooth device, especially as we interact with more and more of them. Control Center should unfurl a menu of networks or devices you can choose from.

Shoot GIFs – Live Photos are a clumsy proprietary format. Instagram’s Boomerang nailed what we want out of live action GIFs and we should be able to shoot them straight from the iOS camera and export them as actual GIFs that can be used across the web. Give us some extra GIF settings and iPhones could have a new reason for teens to choose them over Androids.

Gradual Alarms – Anyone else have a heart attack whenever they hear their phone’s Alarm Clock ringtone? I know I do because I leave my alarms on so loud that I’ll never miss them, but end up being rudely shocked awake. A setting that gradually increases the volume of the iOS Alarm Clock every 15 seconds or minute so I can be gently arisen unless I refuse to get up.

Maybe some of these apply to Android, but I wouldn’t know because I’m a filthy casual iPhoner. Send me your Android suggestions, as well as what else you want to see added to your favorite apps.

[Image Credit: Hanson Inc]

from Mobile – TechCrunch https://tcrn.ch/2ELMwDV ORIGINAL CONTENT FROM: https://techcrunch.com/

[theinvinciblenoob]

‘Twas the night before Xmas, and all through the house, not a feature was stirring from the designer’s mouse . . . Not Twitter! Not Uber, Not Apple or Pinterest! On Facebook! On Snapchat! On Lyft or on Insta! . . . From the sidelines I ask you to flex your code’s might. Happy Xmas to all if you make these apps right.

Instagram

See More Like This – A button on feed posts that when tapped inserts a burst of similar posts before the timeline continues. Want to see more fashion, sunsets, selfies, food porn, pets, or Boomerangs? Instagram’s machine vision technology and metadata would gather them from people you follow and give you a dose. You shouldn’t have to work through search, hashtags, or the Explore page, nor permanently change your feed by following new accounts. Pinterest briefly had this feature (and should bring it back) but it’d work better on Insta.

Web DMs – Instagram’s messaging feature has become the defacto place for sharing memes and trash talk about people’s photos, but it’s stuck on mobile. For all the college kids and entry-level office workers out there, this would make being stuck on laptops all day much more fun. Plus, youth culture truthsayer Taylor Lorenz wants Instagram web DMs too.

Upload Quality Indicator – Try to post a Story video or Boomerang from a crummy internet connection and they turn out a blurry mess. Instagram should warn us if our signal strength is low compared to what we usually have (since some places it’s always mediocre) and either recommend we wait for Wi-Fi, or post a low-res copy that’s replaced by the high-res version when possible.

Oh, and if new VP of product Vishal Shah is listening, I’d also like Bitmoji-style avatars and a better way to discover accounts that shows a selection of their recent posts plus their bio, instead of just one post and no context in Explore which is better for discovering content.

Every feed app should steal Pinterest’s ‘more like this’ button

Twitter

DM Search – Ummm, this is pretty straightforward. It’s absurd that you can’t even search DMs by person, let alone keyword. Twitter knows messaging is a big thing on mobile right? And DMs are one of the most powerful ways to get in contact with mid-level public figures and journalists. PS: My DMs are open if you’ve got a news tip — @JoshConstine.

Unfollow Suggestions – Social networks are obsessed with getting us to follow more people, but do a terrible job of helping us clean up our feeds. With Twitter bringing back the option to see a chronological feed, we need unfollow suggestions more than ever. It should analyze who I follow but never click, fave, reply to, retweet, or even slow down to read and ask if I want to nix them. I asked for this 5 years ago and the problem has only gotten worse. Since people feel like their feeds are already overflowing, they’re stingy with following new people. That’s partly why you see accounts get only a handful of new followers when their tweets go viral and are seen by millions. I recently had a tweet with 1.7 million impressions and 18,000 Likes that drove just 11 follows. Yes I know that’s a self-own.

Analytics Benchmarks – If Twitter wants to improve conversation quality, it should teach us what works. Twitter offers analytics about each of your tweets, but not in context of your other posts. Did this drive more or fewer link clicks or follows than my typical tweet? That kind of info could guide users to create more compelling content.

Twitter Quitters And The Unfiltered Feed Problem

Facebook

(Obviously we could get into Facebook’s myriad problems here. A less sensationalized feed that doesn’t reward exaggerated claims would top my list. Hopefully its plan to downrank “borderline content” that almost violates its policies will help when it rolls out.)

Batched Notifications – Facebook sends way too many notifications. Some are downright useless and should be eliminated. “14 friends responded to events happening tomorrow”? “Someone’s fundraiser is half way to its goal?” Get that shit out of here. But there are other notifications I want to see but that aren’t urgent nor crucial to know about individually. Facebook should let us decide to batch notifications so we’d only get one of a certain type every 12 or 24 hours, or only when a certain number of similar ones are triggered. I’d love a digest of posts to my Groups or Events from the past day rather than every time someone opens their mouth.

I so don’t care

Notifications In The “Time Well Spent” Feature – Facebook tells you how many minutes you spent on it each day over the past week and on average, but my total time on Facebook matters less to me than how often it interrupts my life with push notifications. The “Your Time On Facebook” feature should show how many notifications of each type I’ve received, which ones I actually opened, and let me turn off or batch the ones I want fewer of.

Facebook is finally rolling out its ‘how long do I spend on Facebook’ dashboard

Oh, and for Will Cathcart, Facebook’s VP of apps, can I also get proper syncing so I don’t rewatch the same Stories on Instagram and Facebook, the ability to invite people to Events on mobile based on past invite lists of those I’ve hosted or attended, and the See More Like This feature I recommended for Instagram?

Uber/Lyft/Ridesharing

“Quiet Ride” Button – Sometimes you’re just not in the mood for small talk. Had a rough day, need to get work done, or want to just zone out? Ridesharing apps should offer a request for a quiet ride that if the driver accepts, you pay them an extra dollar (or get it free as a loyalty perk), and you get ferried to your destination without unnecessary conversation. I get that it’s a bit dehumanizing for the driver, but I’d bet some would happily take a little extra cash for their compliance.

“I Need More Time” Button – Sometimes you overestimate the ETA and suddenly your car is arriving before you’re ready to leave. Instead of cancelling and rebooking a few minutes later, frantically rushing so you don’t miss your window and get smacked with a no-show fee, or making the driver wait while they and the company aren’t getting paid, Uber, Lyft, and the rest should offer the “I Need More Time” button that simply rebooks you a car that’s a little further away.

Spotify/Music Streaming Apps

Scan My Collection – I wish I could just take photos of the album covers, spines, or even discs of my CD or record collection and have them instantly added to a playlist or folder. It’s kind of sad that after lifetimes of collecting physical music, most of it now sits on a shelf and we forget to play what we used to love. Music apps want more data on what we like, and it’s just sitting there gathering dust. There’s obviously some fun viral potential here too. Let me share what’s my most embarrassing CD. For me, it’s my dual copies of Limp Bizkit’s “Significant Other” because I played the first one so much it got scratched.

Friends Weekly – Spotify ditched its in-app messaging, third-party app platform, and other ways to discover music so its playlists would decide what becomes a hit in order to exert leverage over the record labels to negotiate better deals. But music discovery is inherently social and the desktop little ticker of what friends are playing on doesn’t cut it. Spotify should let me choose to recommend my new favorite song or agree to let it share what I’ve recently played most, and put those into a Discover Weekly-style social playlist of what friends are listening to.

How Spotify is finally gaining leverage over record labels

Snapchat

Growth – I’m sorry, I had to.

Bulk Export Memories – But seriously, Snapchat is shrinking. That’s worrisome because some users’ photos and videos are trapped on its Memories cloud hosting feature that’s supposed to help free up space on your phone. But there’s no bulk export option, meaning it could take hours of saving shots one at a time to your camera roll if you needed to get off of Snapchat, if for example it was shutting down, or got acquired, or you’re just bored of it.

Add-On Cameras – Snapchat’s Spectacles are actually pretty neat for recording first-person or underwater shots in a circular format. But otherwise they don’t do much more, and in some ways do much less, than your phone’s camera and are a long way from being a Magic Leap competitor. That’s why if Snapchat really wants to become a “Camera Company”, it should build sleek add-on cameras that augment our phone’s hardware. Snap previously explored selling a 360-camera but never launched one. A little Giroptic iO-style 360 lens that attaches to your phone’s charging port could let you capture a new kind of content that really makes people feel like they’re there with you. An Aukey Aura-style zoom lens attachment that easily fits in your pocket unlike a DSLR could also be a hit

Snap explored selling a 360 camera

iOS

Switch Wi-Fi/Bluetooth From Control Center – I thought the whole point of Control Center was one touch access, but I can only turn on or off the Wi-Fi and Bluetooth. It’s silly having to dig into the Settings menu to switch to a different Wi-Fi network or Bluetooth device, especially as we interact with more and more of them. Control Center should unfurl a menu of networks or devices you can choose from.

Shoot GIFs – Live Photos are a clumsy proprietary format. Instagram’s Boomerang nailed what we want out of live action GIFs and we should be able to shoot them straight from the iOS camera and export them as actual GIFs that can be used across the web. Give us some extra GIF settings and iPhones could have a new reason for teens to choose them over Androids.

Gradual Alarms – Anyone else have a heart attack whenever they hear their phone’s Alarm Clock ringtone? I know I do because I leave my alarms on so loud that I’ll never miss them, but end up being rudely shocked awake. A setting that gradually increases the volume of the iOS Alarm Clock every 15 seconds or minute so I can be gently arisen unless I refuse to get up.

Maybe some of these apply to Android, but I wouldn’t know because I’m a filthy casual iPhoner. Send me your Android suggestions, as well as what else you want to see added to your favorite apps.

[Image Credit: Hanson Inc]

via TechCrunch

[fmservers]

My product launch wishlist for Instagram, Twitter, Uber and more

‘Twas the night before Xmas, and all through the house, not a feature was stirring from the designer’s mouse . . . Not Twitter! Not Uber, Not Apple or Pinterest! On Facebook! On Snapchat! On Lyft or on Insta! . . . From the sidelines I ask you to flex your code’s might. Happy Xmas to all if you make these apps right.

Instagram

See More Like This – A button on feed posts that when tapped inserts a burst of similar posts before the timeline continues. Want to see more fashion, sunsets, selfies, food porn, pets, or Boomerangs? Instagram’s machine vision technology and metadata would gather them from people you follow and give you a dose. You shouldn’t have to work through search, hashtags, or the Explore page, nor permanently change your feed by following new accounts. Pinterest briefly had this feature (and should bring it back) but it’d work better on Insta.

Web DMs – Instagram’s messaging feature has become the defacto place for sharing memes and trash talk about people’s photos, but it’s stuck on mobile. For all the college kids and entry-level office workers out there, this would make being stuck on laptops all day much more fun. Plus, youth culture truthsayer Taylor Lorenz wants Instagram web DMs too.

Upload Quality Indicator – Try to post a Story video or Boomerang from a crummy internet connection and they turn out a blurry mess. Instagram should warn us if our signal strength is low compared to what we usually have (since some places it’s always mediocre) and either recommend we wait for Wi-Fi, or post a low-res copy that’s replaced by the high-res version when possible.

Oh, and if new VP of product Vishal Shah is listening, I’d also like Bitmoji-style avatars and a better way to discover accounts that shows a selection of their recent posts plus their bio, instead of just one post and no context in Explore which is better for discovering content.

Every feed app should steal Pinterest’s ‘more like this’ button

Twitter

DM Search – Ummm, this is pretty straightforward. It’s absurd that you can’t even search DMs by person, let alone keyword. Twitter knows messaging is a big thing on mobile right? And DMs are one of the most powerful ways to get in contact with mid-level public figures and journalists. PS: My DMs are open if you’ve got a news tip — @JoshConstine.

Unfollow Suggestions – Social networks are obsessed with getting us to follow more people, but do a terrible job of helping us clean up our feeds. With Twitter bringing back the option to see a chronological feed, we need unfollow suggestions more than ever. It should analyze who I follow but never click, fave, reply to, retweet, or even slow down to read and ask if I want to nix them. I asked for this 5 years ago and the problem has only gotten worse. Since people feel like their feeds are already overflowing, they’re stingy with following new people. That’s partly why you see accounts get only a handful of new followers when their tweets go viral and are seen by millions. I recently had a tweet with 1.7 million impressions and 18,000 Likes that drove just 11 follows. Yes I know that’s a self-own.

Analytics Benchmarks – If Twitter wants to improve conversation quality, it should teach us what works. Twitter offers analytics about each of your tweets, but not in context of your other posts. Did this drive more or fewer link clicks or follows than my typical tweet? That kind of info could guide users to create more compelling content.

Twitter Quitters And The Unfiltered Feed Problem

Facebook

(Obviously we could get into Facebook’s myriad problems here. A less sensationalized feed that doesn’t reward exaggerated claims would top my list. Hopefully its plan to downrank “borderline content” that almost violates its policies will help when it rolls out.)

Batched Notifications – Facebook sends way too many notifications. Some are downright useless and should be eliminated. “14 friends responded to events happening tomorrow”? “Someone’s fundraiser is half way to its goal?” Get that shit out of here. But there are other notifications I want to see but that aren’t urgent nor crucial to know about individually. Facebook should let us decide to batch notifications so we’d only get one of a certain type every 12 or 24 hours, or only when a certain number of similar ones are triggered. I’d love a digest of posts to my Groups or Events from the past day rather than every time someone opens their mouth.

I so don’t care

Notifications In The “Time Well Spent” Feature – Facebook tells you how many minutes you spent on it each day over the past week and on average, but my total time on Facebook matters less to me than how often it interrupts my life with push notifications. The “Your Time On Facebook” feature should show how many notifications of each type I’ve received, which ones I actually opened, and let me turn off or batch the ones I want fewer of.

Facebook is finally rolling out its ‘how long do I spend on Facebook’ dashboard

Oh, and for Will Cathcart, Facebook’s VP of apps, can I also get proper syncing so I don’t rewatch the same Stories on Instagram and Facebook, the ability to invite people to Events on mobile based on past invite lists of those I’ve hosted or attended, and the See More Like This feature I recommended for Instagram?

Uber/Lyft/Ridesharing

“Quiet Ride” Button – Sometimes you’re just not in the mood for small talk. Had a rough day, need to get work done, or want to just zone out? Ridesharing apps should offer a request for a quiet ride that if the driver accepts, you pay them an extra dollar (or get it free as a loyalty perk), and you get ferried to your destination without unnecessary conversation. I get that it’s a bit dehumanizing for the driver, but I’d bet some would happily take a little extra cash for their compliance.

“I Need More Time” Button – Sometimes you overestimate the ETA and suddenly your car is arriving before you’re ready to leave. Instead of cancelling and rebooking a few minutes later, frantically rushing so you don’t miss your window and get smacked with a no-show fee, or making the driver wait while they and the company aren’t getting paid, Uber, Lyft, and the rest should offer the “I Need More Time” button that simply rebooks you a car that’s a little further away.

Spotify/Music Streaming Apps

Scan My Collection – I wish I could just take photos of the album covers, spines, or even discs of my CD or record collection and have them instantly added to a playlist or folder. It’s kind of sad that after lifetimes of collecting physical music, most of it now sits on a shelf and we forget to play what we used to love. Music apps want more data on what we like, and it’s just sitting there gathering dust. There’s obviously some fun viral potential here too. Let me share what’s my most embarrassing CD. For me, it’s my dual copies of Limp Bizkit’s “Significant Other” because I played the first one so much it got scratched.

Friends Weekly – Spotify ditched its in-app messaging, third-party app platform, and other ways to discover music so its playlists would decide what becomes a hit in order to exert leverage over the record labels to negotiate better deals. But music discovery is inherently social and the desktop little ticker of what friends are playing on doesn’t cut it. Spotify should let me choose to recommend my new favorite song or agree to let it share what I’ve recently played most, and put those into a Discover Weekly-style social playlist of what friends are listening to.

How Spotify is finally gaining leverage over record labels

Snapchat

Growth – I’m sorry, I had to.

Bulk Export Memories – But seriously, Snapchat is shrinking. That’s worrisome because some users’ photos and videos are trapped on its Memories cloud hosting feature that’s supposed to help free up space on your phone. But there’s no bulk export option, meaning it could take hours of saving shots one at a time to your camera roll if you needed to get off of Snapchat, if for example it was shutting down, or got acquired, or you’re just bored of it.

Add-On Cameras – Snapchat’s Spectacles are actually pretty neat for recording first-person or underwater shots in a circular format. But otherwise they don’t do much more, and in some ways do much less, than your phone’s camera and are a long way from being a Magic Leap competitor. That’s why if Snapchat really wants to become a “Camera Company”, it should build sleek add-on cameras that augment our phone’s hardware. Snap previously explored selling a 360-camera but never launched one. A little Giroptic iO-style 360 lens that attaches to your phone’s charging port could let you capture a new kind of content that really makes people feel like they’re there with you. An Aukey Aura-style zoom lens attachment that easily fits in your pocket unlike a DSLR could also be a hit

Snap explored selling a 360 camera

iOS

Switch Wi-Fi/Bluetooth From Control Center – I thought the whole point of Control Center was one touch access, but I can only turn on or off the Wi-Fi and Bluetooth. It’s silly having to dig into the Settings menu to switch to a different Wi-Fi network or Bluetooth device, especially as we interact with more and more of them. Control Center should unfurl a menu of networks or devices you can choose from.

Shoot GIFs – Live Photos are a clumsy proprietary format. Instagram’s Boomerang nailed what we want out of live action GIFs and we should be able to shoot them straight from the iOS camera and export them as actual GIFs that can be used across the web. Give us some extra GIF settings and iPhones could have a new reason for teens to choose them over Androids.

Gradual Alarms – Anyone else have a heart attack whenever they hear their phone’s Alarm Clock ringtone? I know I do because I leave my alarms on so loud that I’ll never miss them, but end up being rudely shocked awake. A setting that gradually increases the volume of the iOS Alarm Clock every 15 seconds or minute so I can be gently arisen unless I refuse to get up.

Maybe some of these apply to Android, but I wouldn’t know because I’m a filthy casual iPhoner. Send me your Android suggestions, as well as what else you want to see added to your favorite apps.

[Image Credit: Hanson Inc]

Via Josh Constine https://techcrunch.com

[williamsjoan]

My product launch wishlist for Instagram, Twitter, Uber and more

‘Twas the night before Xmas, and all through the house, not a feature was stirring from the designer’s mouse . . . Not Twitter! Not Uber, Not Apple or Pinterest! On Facebook! On Snapchat! On Lyft or on Insta! . . . From the sidelines I ask you to flex your code’s might. Happy Xmas to all if you make these apps right.

Instagram

See More Like This – A button on feed posts that when tapped inserts a burst of similar posts before the timeline continues. Want to see more fashion, sunsets, selfies, food porn, pets, or Boomerangs? Instagram’s machine vision technology and metadata would gather them from people you follow and give you a dose. You shouldn’t have to work through search, hashtags, or the Explore page, nor permanently change your feed by following new accounts. Pinterest briefly had this feature (and should bring it back) but it’d work better on Insta.

Web DMs – Instagram’s messaging feature has become the defacto place for sharing memes and trash talk about people’s photos, but it’s stuck on mobile. For all the college kids and entry-level office workers out there, this would make being stuck on laptops all day much more fun. Plus, youth culture truthsayer Taylor Lorenz wants Instagram web DMs too.

Upload Quality Indicator – Try to post a Story video or Boomerang from a crummy internet connection and they turn out a blurry mess. Instagram should warn us if our signal strength is low compared to what we usually have (since some places it’s always mediocre) and either recommend we wait for Wi-Fi, or post a low-res copy that’s replaced by the high-res version when possible.

Oh, and if new VP of product Vishal Shah is listening, I’d also like Bitmoji-style avatars and a better way to discover accounts that shows a selection of their recent posts plus their bio, instead of just one post and no context in Explore which is better for discovering content.

Every feed app should steal Pinterest’s ‘more like this’ button

Twitter

DM Search – Ummm, this is pretty straightforward. It’s absurd that you can’t even search DMs by person, let alone keyword. Twitter knows messaging is a big thing on mobile right? And DMs are one of the most powerful ways to get in contact with mid-level public figures and journalists. PS: My DMs are open if you’ve got a news tip — @JoshConstine.

Unfollow Suggestions – Social networks are obsessed with getting us to follow more people, but do a terrible job of helping us clean up our feeds. With Twitter bringing back the option to see a chronological feed, we need unfollow suggestions more than ever. It should analyze who I follow but never click, fave, reply to, retweet, or even slow down to read and ask if I want to nix them. I asked for this 5 years ago and the problem has only gotten worse. Since people feel like their feeds are already overflowing, they’re stingy with following new people. That’s partly why you see accounts get only a handful of new followers when their tweets go viral and are seen by millions. I recently had a tweet with 1.7 million impressions and 18,000 Likes that drove just 11 follows. Yes I know that’s a self-own.

Analytics Benchmarks – If Twitter wants to improve conversation quality, it should teach us what works. Twitter offers analytics about each of your tweets, but not in context of your other posts. Did this drive more or fewer link clicks or follows than my typical tweet? That kind of info could guide users to create more compelling content.

Twitter Quitters And The Unfiltered Feed Problem

Facebook

(Obviously we could get into Facebook’s myriad problems here. A less sensationalized feed that doesn’t reward exaggerated claims would top my list. Hopefully its plan to downrank “borderline content” that almost violates its policies will help when it rolls out.)

Batched Notifications – Facebook sends way too many notifications. Some are downright useless and should be eliminated. “14 friends responded to events happening tomorrow”? “Someone’s fundraiser is half way to its goal?” Get that shit out of here. But there are other notifications I want to see but that aren’t urgent nor crucial to know about individually. Facebook should let us decide to batch notifications so we’d only get one of a certain type every 12 or 24 hours, or only when a certain number of similar ones are triggered. I’d love a digest of posts to my Groups or Events from the past day rather than every time someone opens their mouth.

I so don’t care

Notifications In The “Time Well Spent” Feature – Facebook tells you how many minutes you spent on it each day over the past week and on average, but my total time on Facebook matters less to me than how often it interrupts my life with push notifications. The “Your Time On Facebook” feature should show how many notifications of each type I’ve received, which ones I actually opened, and let me turn off or batch the ones I want fewer of.

Facebook is finally rolling out its ‘how long do I spend on Facebook’ dashboard

Oh, and for Will Cathcart, Facebook’s VP of apps, can I also get proper syncing so I don’t rewatch the same Stories on Instagram and Facebook, the ability to invite people to Events on mobile based on past invite lists of those I’ve hosted or attended, and the See More Like This feature I recommended for Instagram?

Uber/Lyft/Ridesharing

“Quiet Ride” Button – Sometimes you’re just not in the mood for small talk. Had a rough day, need to get work done, or want to just zone out? Ridesharing apps should offer a request for a quiet ride that if the driver accepts, you pay them an extra dollar (or get it free as a loyalty perk), and you get ferried to your destination without unnecessary conversation. I get that it’s a bit dehumanizing for the driver, but I’d bet some would happily take a little extra cash for their compliance.

“I Need More Time” Button – Sometimes you overestimate the ETA and suddenly your car is arriving before you’re ready to leave. Instead of cancelling and rebooking a few minutes later, frantically rushing so you don’t miss your window and get smacked with a no-show fee, or making the driver wait while they and the company aren’t getting paid, Uber, Lyft, and the rest should offer the “I Need More Time” button that simply rebooks you a car that’s a little further away.

Spotify/Music Streaming Apps

Scan My Collection – I wish I could just take photos of the album covers, spines, or even discs of my CD or record collection and have them instantly added to a playlist or folder. It’s kind of sad that after lifetimes of collecting physical music, most of it now sits on a shelf and we forget to play what we used to love. Music apps want more data on what we like, and it’s just sitting there gathering dust. There’s obviously some fun viral potential here too. Let me share what’s my most embarrassing CD. For me, it’s my dual copies of Limp Bizkit’s “Significant Other” because I played the first one so much it got scratched.

Friends Weekly – Spotify ditched its in-app messaging, third-party app platform, and other ways to discover music so its playlists would decide what becomes a hit in order to exert leverage over the record labels to negotiate better deals. But music discovery is inherently social and the desktop little ticker of what friends are playing on doesn’t cut it. Spotify should let me choose to recommend my new favorite song or agree to let it share what I’ve recently played most, and put those into a Discover Weekly-style social playlist of what friends are listening to.

How Spotify is finally gaining leverage over record labels

Snapchat

Growth – I’m sorry, I had to.

Bulk Export Memories – But seriously, Snapchat is shrinking. That’s worrisome because some users’ photos and videos are trapped on its Memories cloud hosting feature that’s supposed to help free up space on your phone. But there’s no bulk export option, meaning it could take hours of saving shots one at a time to your camera roll if you needed to get off of Snapchat, if for example it was shutting down, or got acquired, or you’re just bored of it.

Add-On Cameras – Snapchat’s Spectacles are actually pretty neat for recording first-person or underwater shots in a circular format. But otherwise they don’t do much more, and in some ways do much less, than your phone’s camera and are a long way from being a Magic Leap competitor. That’s why if Snapchat really wants to become a “Camera Company”, it should build sleek add-on cameras that augment our phone’s hardware. Snap previously explored selling a 360-camera but never launched one. A little Giroptic iO-style 360 lens that attaches to your phone’s charging port could let you capture a new kind of content that really makes people feel like they’re there with you. An Aukey Aura-style zoom lens attachment that easily fits in your pocket unlike a DSLR could also be a hit

Snap explored selling a 360 camera

iOS

Switch Wi-Fi/Bluetooth From Control Center – I thought the whole point of Control Center was one touch access, but I can only turn on or off the Wi-Fi and Bluetooth. It’s silly having to dig into the Settings menu to switch to a different Wi-Fi network or Bluetooth device, especially as we interact with more and more of them. Control Center should unfurl a menu of networks or devices you can choose from.

Shoot GIFs – Live Photos are a clumsy proprietary format. Instagram’s Boomerang nailed what we want out of live action GIFs and we should be able to shoot them straight from the iOS camera and export them as actual GIFs that can be used across the web. Give us some extra GIF settings and iPhones could have a new reason for teens to choose them over Androids.

Gradual Alarms – Anyone else have a heart attack whenever they hear their phone’s Alarm Clock ringtone? I know I do because I leave my alarms on so loud that I’ll never miss them, but end up being rudely shocked awake. A setting that gradually increases the volume of the iOS Alarm Clock every 15 seconds or minute so I can be gently arisen unless I refuse to get up.

Maybe some of these apply to Android, but I wouldn’t know because I’m a filthy casual iPhoner. Send me your Android suggestions, as well as what else you want to see added to your favorite apps.

[Image Credit: Hanson Inc]

My product launch wishlist for Instagram, Twitter, Uber and more published first on https://timloewe.tumblr.com/

[readersforum]

My product launch wishlist for Instagram, Twitter, Uber and more

New Post has been published on http://www.readersforum.tk/my-product-launch-wishlist-for-instagram-twitter-uber-and-more/

My product launch wishlist for Instagram, Twitter, Uber and more

‘Twas the night before Xmas, and all through the house, not a feature was stirring from the designer’s mouse . . . Not Twitter! Not Uber, Not Apple or Pinterest! On Facebook! On Snapchat! On Lyft or on Insta! . . . From the sidelines I ask you to flex your code’s might. Happy Xmas to all if you make these apps right.

Instagram

See More Like This – A button on feed posts that when tapped inserts a burst of similar posts before the timeline continues. Want to see more fashion, sunsets, selfies, food porn, pets, or Boomerangs? Instagram’s machine vision technology and metadata would gather them from people you follow and give you a dose. You shouldn’t have to work through search, hashtags, or the Explore page, nor permanently change your feed by following new accounts. Pinterest briefly had this feature (and should bring it back) but it’d work better on Insta.

Web DMs – Instagram’s messaging feature has become the defacto place for sharing memes and trash talk about people’s photos, but it’s stuck on mobile. For all the college kids and entry-level office workers out there, this would make being stuck on laptops all day much more fun. Plus, youth culture truthsayer Taylor Lorenz wants Instagram web DMs too.

Upload Quality Indicator – Try to post a Story video or Boomerang from a crummy internet connection and they turn out a blurry mess. Instagram should warn us if our signal strength is low compared to what we usually have (since some places it’s always mediocre) and either recommend we wait for Wi-Fi, or post a low-res copy that’s replaced by the high-res version when possible.

Oh, and if new VP of product Vishal Shah is listening, I’d also like Bitmoji-style avatars and a better way to discover accounts that shows a selection of their recent posts plus their bio, instead of just one post and no context in Explore which is better for discovering content.

Every feed app should steal Pinterest’s ‘more like this’ button

Twitter

DM Search – Ummm, this is pretty straightforward. It’s absurd that you can’t even search DMs by person, let alone keyword. Twitter knows messaging is a big thing on mobile right? And DMs are one of the most powerful ways to get in contact with mid-level public figures and journalists. PS: My DMs are open if you’ve got a news tip — @JoshConstine.

Unfollow Suggestions – Social networks are obsessed with getting us to follow more people, but do a terrible job of helping us clean up our feeds. With Twitter bringing back the option to see a chronological feed, we need unfollow suggestions more than ever. It should analyze who I follow but never click, fave, reply to, retweet, or even slow down to read and ask if I want to nix them. I asked for this 5 years ago and the problem has only gotten worse. Since people feel like their feeds are already overflowing, they’re stingy with following new people. That’s partly why you see accounts get only a handful of new followers when their tweets go viral and are seen by millions. I recently had a tweet with 1.7 million impressions and 18,000 Likes that drove just 11 follows. Yes I know that’s a self-own.

Analytics Benchmarks – If Twitter wants to improve conversation quality, it should teach us what works. Twitter offers analytics about each of your tweets, but not in context of your other posts. Did this drive more or fewer link clicks or follows than my typical tweet? That kind of info could guide users to create more compelling content.

Twitter Quitters And The Unfiltered Feed Problem

Facebook

(Obviously we could get into Facebook’s myriad problems here. A less sensationalized feed that doesn’t reward exaggerated claims would top my list. Hopefully its plan to downrank “borderline content” that almost violates its policies will help when it rolls out.)

Batched Notifications – Facebook sends way too many notifications. Some are downright useless and should be eliminated. “14 friends responded to events happening tomorrow”? “Someone’s fundraiser is half way to its goal?” Get that shit out of here. But there are other notifications I want to see but that aren’t urgent nor crucial to know about individually. Facebook should let us decide to batch notifications so we’d only get one of a certain type every 12 or 24 hours, or only when a certain number of similar ones are triggered. I’d love a digest of posts to my Groups or Events from the past day rather than every time someone opens their mouth.

I so don’t care

Notifications In The “Time Well Spent” Feature – Facebook tells you how many minutes you spent on it each day over the past week and on average, but my total time on Facebook matters less to me than how often it interrupts my life with push notifications. The “Your Time On Facebook” feature should show how many notifications of each type I’ve received, which ones I actually opened, and let me turn off or batch the ones I want fewer of.

Facebook is finally rolling out its ‘how long do I spend on Facebook’ dashboard

Oh, and for Will Cathcart, Facebook’s VP of apps, can I also get proper syncing so I don’t rewatch the same Stories on Instagram and Facebook, the ability to invite people to Events on mobile based on past invite lists of those I’ve hosted or attended, and the See More Like This feature I recommended for Instagram?

Uber/Lyft/Ridesharing

“Quiet Ride” Button – Sometimes you’re just not in the mood for small talk. Had a rough day, need to get work done, or want to just zone out? Ridesharing apps should offer a request for a quiet ride that if the driver accepts, you pay them an extra dollar (or get it free as a loyalty perk), and you get ferried to your destination without unnecessary conversation. I get that it’s a bit dehumanizing for the driver, but I’d bet some would happily take a little extra cash for their compliance.

“I Need More Time” Button – Sometimes you overestimate the ETA and suddenly your car is arriving before you’re ready to leave. Instead of cancelling and rebooking a few minutes later, frantically rushing so you don’t miss your window and get smacked with a no-show fee, or making the driver wait while they and the company aren’t getting paid, Uber, Lyft, and the rest should offer the “I Need More Time” button that simply rebooks you a car that’s a little further away.

Spotify/Music Streaming Apps

Scan My Collection – I wish I could just take photos of the album covers, spines, or even discs of my CD or record collection and have them instantly added to a playlist or folder. It’s kind of sad that after lifetimes of collecting physical music, most of it now sits on a shelf and we forget to play what we used to love. Music apps want more data on what we like, and it’s just sitting there gathering dust. There’s obviously some fun viral potential here too. Let me share what’s my most embarrassing CD. For me, it’s my dual copies of Limp Bizkit’s “Significant Other” because I played the first one so much it got scratched.

Friends Weekly – Spotify ditched its in-app messaging, third-party app platform, and other ways to discover music so its playlists would decide what becomes a hit in order to exert leverage over the record labels to negotiate better deals. But music discovery is inherently social and the desktop little ticker of what friends are playing on doesn’t cut it. Spotify should let me choose to recommend my new favorite song or agree to let it share what I’ve recently played most, and put those into a Discover Weekly-style social playlist of what friends are listening to.

How Spotify is finally gaining leverage over record labels

Snapchat

Growth – I’m sorry, I had to.

Bulk Export Memories – But seriously, Snapchat is shrinking. That’s worrisome because some users’ photos and videos are trapped on its Memories cloud hosting feature that’s supposed to help free up space on your phone. But there’s no bulk export option, meaning it could take hours of saving shots one at a time to your camera roll if you needed to get off of Snapchat, if for example it was shutting down, or got acquired, or you’re just bored of it.

Add-On Cameras – Snapchat’s Spectacles are actually pretty neat for recording first-person or underwater shots in a circular format. But otherwise they don’t do much more, and in some ways do much less, than your phone’s camera and are a long way from being a Magic Leap competitor. That’s why if Snapchat really wants to become a “Camera Company”, it should build sleek add-on cameras that augment our phone’s hardware. Snap previously explored selling a 360-camera but never launched one. A little Giroptic iO-style 360 lens that attaches to your phone’s charging port could let you capture a new kind of content that really makes people feel like they’re there with you. An Aukey Aura-style zoom lens attachment that easily fits in your pocket unlike a DSLR could also be a hit

Snap explored selling a 360 camera

iOS

Switch Wi-Fi/Bluetooth From Control Center – I thought the whole point of Control Center was one touch access, but I can only turn on or off the Wi-Fi and Bluetooth. It’s silly having to dig into the Settings menu to switch to a different Wi-Fi network or Bluetooth device, especially as we interact with more and more of them. Control Center should unfurl a menu of networks or devices you can choose from.

Shoot GIFs – Live Photos are a clumsy proprietary format. Instagram’s Boomerang nailed what we want out of live action GIFs and we should be able to shoot them straight from the iOS camera and export them as actual GIFs that can be used across the web. Give us some extra GIF settings and iPhones could have a new reason for teens to choose them over Androids.

Gradual Alarms – Anyone else have a heart attack whenever they hear their phone’s Alarm Clock ringtone? I know I do because I leave my alarms on so loud that I’ll never miss them, but end up being rudely shocked awake. A setting that gradually increases the volume of the iOS Alarm Clock every 15 seconds or minute so I can be gently arisen unless I refuse to get up.

Maybe some of these apply to Android, but I wouldn’t know because I’m a filthy casual iPhoner. Send me your Android suggestions, as well as what else you want to see added to your favorite apps.

[Image Credit: Hanson Inc]

[dragons-in-bowties-blog]

Books coming out this week: Eden, My Year of Rest and Relaxation, and more

Books coming out this week: Eden, My Year of Rest and Relaxation, and more

Eden, My Year of Rest and Relaxation, and more" src="https://images.hellogiggles.com/uploads/2018/07/09135458/picture-of-books-coming-out-this-week-my-year-of-rest-and-relaxation-eden-books-photo.jpg" width="4608" height="3456"/>

Remember the simpler times? Like when you weren't constantly dehydrated, and your weather app didn't say “feels like 150 degrees,” and you didn't sweat through your T-shirt after being outside for only 30 seconds? Woof. I can barely remember the simpler, cooler times myself. This summer is no joke. So, grab a fan, fix yourself a cool beverage, and dive into the books coming out this week. Because indoor activities are sort of the only option right now. But if you MUST be outside, these titles make great beach reads, too.

If you're reading along in the #HGBookClub with us, we're getting seriously into Social Creature by Tara Isabella Burton, and things are getting tense. Have you ever had a friend like Lavinia? Have you ever felt like a Louise? Who is tricking whom? And, pray tell, who is the narrator?! Only time will tell. Follow along and show us where you're reading with #HGBookClub.

And now, here are 12 books coming out this week that you don't want to miss.

1. Eden by Andrea Kleine, out July 10th

Houghton Mifflin Harcourt

When Hope and Eden were girls, they were abducted by a man they thought was a friend of their father's. They escaped, but the traumatic near-death experience left deep emotional scars. Now, 20 years later, the man is up for parole, and they may be able to keep him in jail with testimonies - but first, Hope must find Eden. Don't miss this haunting novel with heartbreaking themes of attachment and trauma.

2. My Year of Rest and Relaxation by Ottessa Moshfegh, out July 10th

Penguin Press

In My Year of Rest and Relaxation, our narrator's life appears to be perfect. She's thin, blonde, pretty, rich, and gainfully employed at an art gallery in New York City. And yet - because there's so much more to life than what we see on the outside - she's depressed. She finds the world's worst psychiatrist who prescribes her anything and everything, effectively inducing a year where she lives through a hazy drug-induced coma and sleeps life away. Though it's fiction, My Year of Rest and Relaxation will open your eyes to the realities of how much our mental healthcare system seriously lacks IRL.

3. No One Tells You This by Glynnis MacNicol, out July 10th

Simon & Schuster

When Glynnis MacNicol turned 40, she reflected on her successful writing career and full life in New York City. But she still couldn't escape the fact that she didn't have the two things she was “supposed” to have by then: a wedding ring and a baby. Rather than feeling bad about it, she decided to create a blueprint for herself and the rest of the happily single women of the world. No One Tells You This is the most empowering memoir you'll read all summer.

4. What We Were Promised by Lucy Tan, out July 10th

Little, Brown and Company

What We Were Promised tells the story of a family that returns home to Shanghai after living the American dream in the U.S. Upon their homecoming, they're welcomed into an elite community of those who were born in China, educated in the states, and have returned back home since. When Lina finds that her ivory bracelet, a keepsake from her childhood, has gone missing, it sends everyone in their household spiraling. From the head of the household to their housekeeper, everyone is searching for meaning and belonging.

5. Clock Dance by Anne Tyler, out July 10th

Knopf Publishing Group

When Willa receives a phone call that her son's ex-girlfriend was shot and needs her help, she immediately flies across the country to take care of her (and her nine-year-old daughter) (and her dog). Why does she do it? To take a chance on choosing her own path. Clock Dance is a bittersweet reminder to take risks and live a life that satisfies you, not someone else.

6. The Marginalized Majority: Claiming Our Power in a Post-Truth America by Onnesha Roychoudhuri, out July 10th

Melville House

Want to know how to get involved? Want to know how to fight back? Read The Marginalized Majority. It will completely change the way you think about our current political climate. Onnesha Roychoudhuri reminds us that even though our country may feel divided, we're actually fighting for many of the same things.

7. An Ocean of Minutes by Thea Lim, out July 10th

Touchstone

An Ocean of Minutes is a futuristic novel, but it's still so heartbreakingly human. Set in a world where time travel exists and Americans are experiencing a deadly flu, Polly travels to the future to find the treatment that her sick boyfriend Frank needs. They agree to meet in Galveston, Texas, 12 years in the future. But when Polly is re-routed another five years into the future, everything has changed, and Frank is nowhere to be found.

8. From the Corner of the Oval by Beck Dorey-Stein, out July 10th

Spiegel & Grau

Raise your hand if you miss President Barack Obama. (Same.) Even though he's no longer in office, you can relive his greatest hits and go behind the scenes of his administration through the eyes of one of his former staff members. Beck Dorey-Stein worked as one of Obama's stenographers. As she transcribed his words, she also found her own voice as a writer. Even though you've probably never flown on Air Force One or shared the gym with POTUS, you'll still relate to her stories of making friends, getting your heart broken, and finding your voice in your twenties.

9. The Lido by Libby Page, out July 10th

Simon & Schuster

Kate works as a reporter for a small local paper in Brixton, London. She receives an assignment to cover the closing of the local lido, an outdoor pool and rec center. Once there she meets Rosemary, an 86-year-old widow who has swum there every single day since it opened. The more Kate gets to know Rosemary and learns about the lido, her small assignment becomes a lifechanging friendship. And together, the two women fight to keep the lido open.

10. All These Beautiful Strangers by Elizabeth Klehfoth, out July 10th

William Morrow

When Grace disappears from her family's lake house, it leaves her seven-year-old daughter Charlie with many unanswered questions. 10 years later, Charlie is still struggling to put the past behind her. She chooses to throw herself into life at her prestigious school. When she gets tapped by the A's, an elite secret society, she must play The Game to be accepted. Will she survive the diabolical semester-long scavenger hunt - or the terrible truths about her past?

11. Evolution of Goddess: A Modern Girl's Guide to Activating Your Feminine Superpowers by Emma Mildon, out July 10th

Atria Books

It's time to get spiritual and celebrate your inner goddess. Evolution of Goddess is filled with the histories of the goddesses through the ages that you need to know. Plus, you'll learn how to tap into your own feminine superpowers.

12. Suicide Club by Rachel Heng, out July 10th

Henry Holt and Co.

For another futuristic novel, don't miss Suicide Club, set 300 years in the future in New York City. Lea is a Lifer, meaning she has the chance to live forever. But when runs into her estranged father, she gets sucked into the Suicide Club, his mysterious group that rejects the idea of immortality. Lea must choose between living forever and spending a short amount of time with her last remaining family.

Happy reading!

The post Books coming out this week: Eden, My Year of Rest and Relaxation, and more appeared first on HelloGiggles.

[inkundu1]

Books coming out this week: Eden, My Year of Rest and Relaxation, and more

Books coming out this week: Eden, My Year of Rest and Relaxation, and more

Eden, My Year of Rest and Relaxation, and more" src="https://images.hellogiggles.com/uploads/2018/07/09135458/picture-of-books-coming-out-this-week-my-year-of-rest-and-relaxation-eden-books-photo.jpg" width="4608" height="3456"/>

Remember the simpler times? Like when you weren't constantly dehydrated, and your weather app didn't say “feels like 150 degrees,” and you didn't sweat through your T-shirt after being outside for only 30 seconds? Woof. I can barely remember the simpler, cooler times myself. This summer is no joke. So, grab a fan, fix yourself a cool beverage, and dive into the books coming out this week. Because indoor activities are sort of the only option right now. But if you MUST be outside, these titles make great beach reads, too.

If you're reading along in the #HGBookClub with us, we're getting seriously into Social Creature by Tara Isabella Burton, and things are getting tense. Have you ever had a friend like Lavinia? Have you ever felt like a Louise? Who is tricking whom? And, pray tell, who is the narrator?! Only time will tell. Follow along and show us where you're reading with #HGBookClub.

And now, here are 12 books coming out this week that you don't want to miss.

1. Eden by Andrea Kleine, out July 10th

Houghton Mifflin Harcourt

When Hope and Eden were girls, they were abducted by a man they thought was a friend of their father's. They escaped, but the traumatic near-death experience left deep emotional scars. Now, 20 years later, the man is up for parole, and they may be able to keep him in jail with testimonies - but first, Hope must find Eden. Don't miss this haunting novel with heartbreaking themes of attachment and trauma.

2. My Year of Rest and Relaxation by Ottessa Moshfegh, out July 10th

Penguin Press

In My Year of Rest and Relaxation, our narrator's life appears to be perfect. She's thin, blonde, pretty, rich, and gainfully employed at an art gallery in New York City. And yet - because there's so much more to life than what we see on the outside - she's depressed. She finds the world's worst psychiatrist who prescribes her anything and everything, effectively inducing a year where she lives through a hazy drug-induced coma and sleeps life away. Though it's fiction, My Year of Rest and Relaxation will open your eyes to the realities of how much our mental healthcare system seriously lacks IRL.

3. No One Tells You This by Glynnis MacNicol, out July 10th

Simon & Schuster

When Glynnis MacNicol turned 40, she reflected on her successful writing career and full life in New York City. But she still couldn't escape the fact that she didn't have the two things she was “supposed” to have by then: a wedding ring and a baby. Rather than feeling bad about it, she decided to create a blueprint for herself and the rest of the happily single women of the world. No One Tells You This is the most empowering memoir you'll read all summer.

4. What We Were Promised by Lucy Tan, out July 10th

Little, Brown and Company

What We Were Promised tells the story of a family that returns home to Shanghai after living the American dream in the U.S. Upon their homecoming, they're welcomed into an elite community of those who were born in China, educated in the states, and have returned back home since. When Lina finds that her ivory bracelet, a keepsake from her childhood, has gone missing, it sends everyone in their household spiraling. From the head of the household to their housekeeper, everyone is searching for meaning and belonging.

5. Clock Dance by Anne Tyler, out July 10th

Knopf Publishing Group

When Willa receives a phone call that her son's ex-girlfriend was shot and needs her help, she immediately flies across the country to take care of her (and her nine-year-old daughter) (and her dog). Why does she do it? To take a chance on choosing her own path. Clock Dance is a bittersweet reminder to take risks and live a life that satisfies you, not someone else.

6. The Marginalized Majority: Claiming Our Power in a Post-Truth America by Onnesha Roychoudhuri, out July 10th

Melville House

Want to know how to get involved? Want to know how to fight back? Read The Marginalized Majority. It will completely change the way you think about our current political climate. Onnesha Roychoudhuri reminds us that even though our country may feel divided, we're actually fighting for many of the same things.

7. An Ocean of Minutes by Thea Lim, out July 10th

Touchstone

An Ocean of Minutes is a futuristic novel, but it's still so heartbreakingly human. Set in a world where time travel exists and Americans are experiencing a deadly flu, Polly travels to the future to find the treatment that her sick boyfriend Frank needs. They agree to meet in Galveston, Texas, 12 years in the future. But when Polly is re-routed another five years into the future, everything has changed, and Frank is nowhere to be found.

8. From the Corner of the Oval by Beck Dorey-Stein, out July 10th

Spiegel & Grau

Raise your hand if you miss President Barack Obama. (Same.) Even though he's no longer in office, you can relive his greatest hits and go behind the scenes of his administration through the eyes of one of his former staff members. Beck Dorey-Stein worked as one of Obama's stenographers. As she transcribed his words, she also found her own voice as a writer. Even though you've probably never flown on Air Force One or shared the gym with POTUS, you'll still relate to her stories of making friends, getting your heart broken, and finding your voice in your twenties.

9. The Lido by Libby Page, out July 10th

Simon & Schuster

Kate works as a reporter for a small local paper in Brixton, London. She receives an assignment to cover the closing of the local lido, an outdoor pool and rec center. Once there she meets Rosemary, an 86-year-old widow who has swum there every single day since it opened. The more Kate gets to know Rosemary and learns about the lido, her small assignment becomes a lifechanging friendship. And together, the two women fight to keep the lido open.

10. All These Beautiful Strangers by Elizabeth Klehfoth, out July 10th

William Morrow

When Grace disappears from her family's lake house, it leaves her seven-year-old daughter Charlie with many unanswered questions. 10 years later, Charlie is still struggling to put the past behind her. She chooses to throw herself into life at her prestigious school. When she gets tapped by the A's, an elite secret society, she must play The Game to be accepted. Will she survive the diabolical semester-long scavenger hunt - or the terrible truths about her past?

11. Evolution of Goddess: A Modern Girl's Guide to Activating Your Feminine Superpowers by Emma Mildon, out July 10th

Atria Books

It's time to get spiritual and celebrate your inner goddess. Evolution of Goddess is filled with the histories of the goddesses through the ages that you need to know. Plus, you'll learn how to tap into your own feminine superpowers.

12. Suicide Club by Rachel Heng, out July 10th

Henry Holt and Co.

For another futuristic novel, don't miss Suicide Club, set 300 years in the future in New York City. Lea is a Lifer, meaning she has the chance to live forever. But when runs into her estranged father, she gets sucked into the Suicide Club, his mysterious group that rejects the idea of immortality. Lea must choose between living forever and spending a short amount of time with her last remaining family.

Happy reading!

The post Books coming out this week: Eden, My Year of Rest and Relaxation, and more appeared first on HelloGiggles.

[cowgirluli-blog]

Books coming out this week: Eden, My Year of Rest and Relaxation, and more

Books coming out this week: Eden, My Year of Rest and Relaxation, and more

Remember the simpler times? Like when you weren't constantly dehydrated, and your weather app didn't say “feels like 150 degrees,” and you didn't sweat through your T-shirt after being outside for only 30 seconds? Woof. I can barely remember the simpler, cooler times myself. This summer is no joke. So, grab a fan, fix yourself a cool beverage, and dive into the books coming out this week. Because indoor activities are sort of the only option right now. But if you MUST be outside, these titles make great beach reads, too.

If you're reading along in the #HGBookClub with us, we're getting seriously into Social Creature by Tara Isabella Burton, and things are getting tense. Have you ever had a friend like Lavinia? Have you ever felt like a Louise? Who is tricking whom? And, pray tell, who is the narrator?! Only time will tell. Follow along and show us where you're reading with #HGBookClub.

And now, here are 12 books coming out this week that you don't want to miss.

1. Eden by Andrea Kleine, out July 10th

Houghton Mifflin Harcourt

When Hope and Eden were girls, they were abducted by a man they thought was a friend of their father's. They escaped, but the traumatic near-death experience left deep emotional scars. Now, 20 years later, the man is up for parole, and they may be able to keep him in jail with testimonies - but first, Hope must find Eden. Don't miss this haunting novel with heartbreaking themes of attachment and trauma.

2. My Year of Rest and Relaxation by Ottessa Moshfegh, out July 10th

Penguin Press

In My Year of Rest and Relaxation, our narrator's life appears to be perfect. She's thin, blonde, pretty, rich, and gainfully employed at an art gallery in New York City. And yet - because there's so much more to life than what we see on the outside - she's depressed. She finds the world's worst psychiatrist who prescribes her anything and everything, effectively inducing a year where she lives through a hazy drug-induced coma and sleeps life away. Though it's fiction, My Year of Rest and Relaxation will open your eyes to the realities of how much our mental healthcare system seriously lacks IRL.

3. No One Tells You This by Glynnis MacNicol, out July 10th

Simon & Schuster

When Glynnis MacNicol turned 40, she reflected on her successful writing career and full life in New York City. But she still couldn't escape the fact that she didn't have the two things she was “supposed” to have by then: a wedding ring and a baby. Rather than feeling bad about it, she decided to create a blueprint for herself and the rest of the happily single women of the world. No One Tells You This is the most empowering memoir you'll read all summer.

4. What We Were Promised by Lucy Tan, out July 10th

Little, Brown and Company

What We Were Promised tells the story of a family that returns home to Shanghai after living the American dream in the U.S. Upon their homecoming, they're welcomed into an elite community of those who were born in China, educated in the states, and have returned back home since. When Lina finds that her ivory bracelet, a keepsake from her childhood, has gone missing, it sends everyone in their household spiraling. From the head of the household to their housekeeper, everyone is searching for meaning and belonging.

5. Clock Dance by Anne Tyler, out July 10th

Knopf Publishing Group

When Willa receives a phone call that her son's ex-girlfriend was shot and needs her help, she immediately flies across the country to take care of her (and her nine-year-old daughter) (and her dog). Why does she do it? To take a chance on choosing her own path. Clock Dance is a bittersweet reminder to take risks and live a life that satisfies you, not someone else.

6. The Marginalized Majority: Claiming Our Power in a Post-Truth America by Onnesha Roychoudhuri, out July 10th

Melville House

Want to know how to get involved? Want to know how to fight back? Read The Marginalized Majority. It will completely change the way you think about our current political climate. Onnesha Roychoudhuri reminds us that even though our country may feel divided, we're actually fighting for many of the same things.

7. An Ocean of Minutes by Thea Lim, out July 10th

Touchstone

An Ocean of Minutes is a futuristic novel, but it's still so heartbreakingly human. Set in a world where time travel exists and Americans are experiencing a deadly flu, Polly travels to the future to find the treatment that her sick boyfriend Frank needs. They agree to meet in Galveston, Texas, 12 years in the future. But when Polly is re-routed another five years into the future, everything has changed, and Frank is nowhere to be found.

8. From the Corner of the Oval by Beck Dorey-Stein, out July 10th

Spiegel & Grau

Raise your hand if you miss President Barack Obama. (Same.) Even though he's no longer in office, you can relive his greatest hits and go behind the scenes of his administration through the eyes of one of his former staff members. Beck Dorey-Stein worked as one of Obama's stenographers. As she transcribed his words, she also found her own voice as a writer. Even though you've probably never flown on Air Force One or shared the gym with POTUS, you'll still relate to her stories of making friends, getting your heart broken, and finding your voice in your twenties.

9. The Lido by Libby Page, out July 10th

Simon & Schuster

Kate works as a reporter for a small local paper in Brixton, London. She receives an assignment to cover the closing of the local lido, an outdoor pool and rec center. Once there she meets Rosemary, an 86-year-old widow who has swum there every single day since it opened. The more Kate gets to know Rosemary and learns about the lido, her small assignment becomes a lifechanging friendship. And together, the two women fight to keep the lido open.

10. All These Beautiful Strangers by Elizabeth Klehfoth, out July 10th

William Morrow

When Grace disappears from her family's lake house, it leaves her seven-year-old daughter Charlie with many unanswered questions. 10 years later, Charlie is still struggling to put the past behind her. She chooses to throw herself into life at her prestigious school. When she gets tapped by the A's, an elite secret society, she must play The Game to be accepted. Will she survive the diabolical semester-long scavenger hunt - or the terrible truths about her past?

11. Evolution of Goddess: A Modern Girl's Guide to Activating Your Feminine Superpowers by Emma Mildon, out July 10th

Atria Books

It's time to get spiritual and celebrate your inner goddess. Evolution of Goddess is filled with the histories of the goddesses through the ages that you need to know. Plus, you'll learn how to tap into your own feminine superpowers.

12. Suicide Club by Rachel Heng, out July 10th

Henry Holt and Co.

For another futuristic novel, don't miss Suicide Club, set 300 years in the future in New York City. Lea is a Lifer, meaning she has the chance to live forever. But when runs into her estranged father, she gets sucked into the Suicide Club, his mysterious group that rejects the idea of immortality. Lea must choose between living forever and spending a short amount of time with her last remaining family.

Happy reading!

The post Books coming out this week: Eden, My Year of Rest and Relaxation, and more appeared first on HelloGiggles.