#i know urs was about chris and i went off about adrian but | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

honeycombstrawberry · 3 years

Text

so like porcelain

pairing: adrian chase x reader (gn pronouns)

rating: m+

warnings: depictions of torture and canon-typical violence

word count: 6,372

prompts from my inbox (all anonymous): ""omg I'm so glad requests are open!!!!! I literally went through your entire Adrian list and I'M OBSESSED!!!! more Adrian comforting/being protective of reader pls I beg" and "hi i saw requests are open again :D id like to request smth with adrian/vigilante where reader gets injured on a mission and it gets all angsty bc he planned to propose to reader but every time he makes plans and is about to pop the question smth always comes up so doesn't really have a chance to ask them and now he's thinking that maybe it was too late but eventually reader does get better after a really close call then he decides that it doesn't really matter when or where he does it so he just goes in. i really love ur writing and it would mean a lot if you decide to pick this up and im sorry if it's a bit too specific or not up to your liking but if you do then tysm im advance 🥺💙" and "thoughts on reader and adrian getting in some nuclear argument and dont have time to make up before going on some mission. reader gets kidnapped. adrian goes crazyyyyyyy. some good angsty hurt/comfort mmmm mmm mmmm"

one-sentence synopsis: you're so sure you know why adrian's upset, but you don't get a chance to confirm it before it seems like it just might be too late.

author's note: i combined a couple of prompts for this one and i hope you love this story! i'm excited about it!! i got so many requests today and i'm so excited about so many of them!!

read on ao3!

Adrian hasn’t been himself for days.

Like, for days. He’s usually pretty twitchy in general, but this has been next level anxiety. He is seemingly constantly on edge. You keep catching him staring at you when he thinks you’re not looking, but it’s not the regular sort of stare he gives you— the one where he starts looking at you and forgets to stop and you look up to find adoration across his face when your eyes meet.

This is different.

Lately, Adrian’s been staring at you with a sort of— intent. Like he’s resolved about something. He seems determined, in a more serious way than he normally does, and it’s starting to put you on edge.

Usually, Adrian’s a fairly open book. He expresses what he feels when he feels it, says what he thinks when he thinks it, does what he wants to do when he wants to do it. He’s not someone who holds back often, and he especially doesn’t keep things from you. Whatever it is that’s unsettling him, he doesn’t want you to know about it.

You know that could only be a bad thing. It has to do with a mission, you think— or maybe it has to do with you.

You start to grow more and more certain that, whatever it is Adrian’s thinking about all the time, it has to do with you. He starts asking if you want to get dinner all the time, if you want to go out, if you want to do something special. You’re both busy, though, and half the time the plans are canceled because he has to go on a mission, or Chris needs urgent help, or something similar. He always gets so agitated and pissed off when he can’t follow through on whatever he was planning, which is when you start to put the pieces together.

He’s planning to break up with you.

You don’t know how you didn’t see this coming sooner. It was only going to be a matter of time before he got sick of this. He has so much energy, he’s so— so wild, so different, so unique. So— Really, he’s so unhinged, but it’s part of what you love about him. You should’ve known he’d never want a life with somebody like you.

Once that thought takes root in your mind, it’s impossible to weed out. You see the evidence every day, in every single thing Adrian does. He’s more tense with you than normal, a little distant. He’s not speaking his mind. He’s definitely thinking things he’s not saying, which is so viciously unlike him. You’re starting to worry that you don’t know him anymore— that he doesn’t want you to know him.

He still tells you he loves you. He still comes home to the apartment you share. He still sleeps beside you in bed.

But— you can’t help but feel that— something’s different. Something fundamental has changed in Adrian, and he hasn’t told you what it is. Maybe he doesn’t want to tell you what it is. Maybe he doesn’t want you to know; maybe he doesn’t want you to know him. Even if you feel like you’ve connected, and that this was going to be it, the great love of your life, maybe he doesn’t feel that way.

You don’t know how you could have missed it, but you don’t know what else this could be. You’re dreading the day he finally just— does it, tells you, rips the bandaid off and stops prolonging his own suffering. You love him— you love every moment with him— but he must be hating how long this is going on for.

You start to feel like a mess, yourself. Adrian’s twitchy, and so are you; Adrian’s frustrated, and so are you. He gets more twitchy when you’re twitchy, and the cycle just feeds on itself.

Adrian texted you earlier today and asked if you wanted to get dinner tonight. You feel like this might be it, if he finally gets to pull it off. If nothing stops him, tonight will be the night he breaks up with you; you’re sure of it.

You can’t focus for most of the day, after that. You’re glad you have work today, if only for something to distract you as best as it can. Still, your mind keeps wandering back to Adrian, and your heart races every time you remember, and your stomach twists, and fear crawls up the back of your throat. You’re dreading it; you can’t believe you’re about to lose this, and you don’t even know why. You thought everything was going so fucking well.

By the time you get home, you have to convince yourself to go inside. You can see Adrian’s car in the lot, so you pull into your spot beside it. Your heart is practically slamming against your ribs. You dread going inside, but you have to.

Your legs are lead when you head up the stairs of your apartment complex. You get to the apartment you share with Adrian, and you take a deep breath outside the front door before letting yourself in.

“Hey, I’m home,” you call, trying to keep the shake out of your voice. You’re still hoping you’ll be able to convince him not to go, that you’ll somehow be good enough tonight that he’ll change his mind about ending this. Or maybe he’ll just— Explain, and you can figure out what’s going wrong, and the two of you can work on fixing it together—

Adrian comes flying out of the bedroom, half of his Vigilante armor already on, and your heart sinks even further than it already had. Your palms prick with nervous, clammy sweat.

“I’m so sorry,” he says, and he seems— frustrated, actually, or pissed off. “Chris just called and—”

“—he needs you and you have to go,” you finish for him.

The two of you stand in silence for a beat. Then, Adrian says, “If you want, I don’t have to go.”

“No, you should go,” you tell him, and you mean it. He’s a hero; it’s not your right, to tell him not to go just because you’re scared. If anything, at least this will give you a little more time before he tells you he’s done, before this is over, before he leaves. “If he needs you and you’re not there, you’ll be mad at yourself. And me, I guess.” He studies you for a long moment. His brow furrows behind his glasses, face creasing as he’s thinking, examining you, trying to figure you out. You wonder if he suspects that you know what he’s going to do.

After a beat, Adrian says, “Why would I be mad at you?”

You— don’t really know the answer to that, because you’re not sure what you’ve done wrong. You don’t think anything has changed, really; nothing you’re aware of is different, anyways. Your best guess is just that— that he doesn’t love you anymore, so it’s— probably not that he’s mad, just— frustrated, and indifferent, and ready to be finished. Agitated, maybe.

Your hands have a slight shake to him, chest tightening, goosebumps prickling up over your legs and arms in a fear response when you tell him, “I don’t— I don’t know. Why would you be?”

“I don’t know,” Adrian says slowly. He glances down at the hunk of armor in his hands, then back up at you, clearly torn on what he’s supposed to do next.

You don’t think you can do this anymore. You just— In this moment, you can’t think about sitting here alone for another night, wondering if tonight’s going to be the night Adrian decides to come back and tell you he’s done. Your chest hurts like it’s being split open, and you feel like you’re going to fucking— pass out, or throw up on the floor, but you know what you have to do.

You steel yourself, and you say to Adrian, eyes fixed on his knees, voice trembling, “If— If you’re going to break up with me, just— please, just— do it.”

Adrian doesn’t respond. You exhale shakily, a shuddering rush that gusts out of you as you realize he’s still not fucking saying anything. This is the person who never stops talking, and he’s staring at you in total silence.

Your hands are actually fucking shaking. You keep waiting for him to talk, and he keeps not talking, before you finally have to say something, so you start to tell him, “I d—”

The sound of your voice apparently unfreezes him from whatever just possessed him, and he’s suddenly talking a mile a minute, asking, “What the— What the fuck are you— What the fuck are you talking about? What are— Wh— I d— What? What the f—”

It’s all just variations on the same thing. You try to take a deep breath, but you can’t get it in deep enough, rattling shallowly in your chest. You can’t look up as you listen to his stumbling half-denials. It feels like you’re in a nightmare; you can’t believe this is it. You can’t believe you fucking said something to start this. Maybe you could’ve convinced him if you only had more time—

“You don’t have to keep putting it off,” you say softly, cutting him off. “You want to tell me, tell me.”

“You don’t know,” Adrian says quickly.

“Adrian—”

“You don’t,” he snaps back. “Don’t— Don’t say— You don’t know what the fuck you’re talking about.”

You laugh dryly, no humor in it. The back of your throat hurts when you say, “You’ve been trying to tell me something. I’m not stupid. I just— I wish you wouldn’t—”

“What are you even saying?” Adrian demands. He makes an agitated noise, then turns back to the bedroom. He whirls around again, asks you, “You don’t know anything.”

You glare back at him. “Don’t treat me like I don’t know what you’re—”

“You don’t know,” Adrian snaps. His voice is short, agitated, and he shoves his hand through his hair, the other clutching his armor so tight his knuckles are going white. “Just— I just— If you just give me, like, a day, I’ll figure it out, okay? And then it’ll all be over—”

Your eyes flick down again, your heart starting to break in half when you hear that. ‘It’ll all be over,’ on echo in your mind.

“What will?” you ask, shaking.

“What?”

“What’ll be over?” you ask again. “Do you— I mean— Us? Do you mean—”

“Why would you—” Adrian starts to demand, then crouches, his body unable to properly manifest the agitation he’s feeling. He straightens back up, paces, then looks up to you, asks, “I don’t— What— Why?”

“Why what?” you ask, bewildered. “Just— What are you trying to tell me? Are you breaking up with me, is this it?”

Adrian stares hard at you, eyes wide. His chest is heaving; yours is, too, heart racing.

For a beat, he doesn’t speak.

“Adrian,” you ask him. “Tell me.”

“That’s not it,” Adrian says helplessly.

“Then what is it?” you ask. Again, he pauses; again, he seems to be turning over some thought, keeping it trapped in his throat, and you push the heels of your hands into your eyes, aching inside. “Okay. I’m just gonna— Okay.”

“You have to trust me,” Adrian asks of you.

Your chest is aching when you ask him, “Why won’t you tell me?”

“Because I can’t,” Adrian pleads, “Because— Because that’s— That’s how—” He’s frustrated, makes an agitated, trapped noise. “Why can’t you just— fucking— Fuck!”

“I’m trying,” you shout back at him. “Don’t— Don’t fucking yell at me, Adrian, Jesus fucking— I’m scared, I want— I want to know why you’re doing this, but I guess— I guess I’m not surprised. Because I knew it was only a matter of time before you’d—”

The ringing of his phone in the next room cuts you off. It’s the same song that always plays when Chris calls, but it doesn’t make you smile, now.

Now, all you do is stare at Adrian, tears swelling in your eyes and starting to spill over. Your throat burns, hot and sharp and thick. He looks from you back to his phone in the bedroom, and once your eye contact is broken, your hands start shaking. You take this dismissal for what you know it is, starting to twist away.

“What— No, I don’t— I don’t have to go,” he says.

“Yes, you do,” you say. “Being Vigilante is always going to come first for you, and I—”

“You don’t know shit if you think that,” Adrian snaps at you. Your brow furrows, chest aching, stinging.

“Guess I don’t know shit,” you bite back.

“No,” Adrian says, “You fucking— don’t, because otherwise you’d listen to me—”

“You’re not saying anything, Adrian,” you tell him. “You’re not— You’re just— I—” You wrap your arms around yourself, glaring downwards. After a beat, you glare back at him, heart throbbing painfully into your bones. His eyes are bright and his face frustrated. “Why won’t you just say it?”

“Why are you trying to make me say it?” Adrian asks. “Do you want to leave? Because I w—”

“Please,” you stop him, voice breaking apart. You can’t hear him say what you know he’s going to say; can’t hear him say, ‘Because I won’t stop you,’ because you think you’ll go crazy if you hear it. You turn around, saying, “I just— You— You can tell me when you get back.”

He’s quiet, for a second. Then, he says, “I don’t— Are you… Like— Are you happy? Do you—”

“Adrian,” you tell him, the knot in your throat swelling. You finally start breaking, crying in earnest. You keep your face turned away; his phone starts to ring again from the next room.

“I sh—” Adrian starts, then stops. He finally says, “I should get that, I might— He might need me.”

You nod, still staring hard at the trim of paint where the wall meets the floor. Softly, you tell him, “You deserve better than me, anyways.”

You grab the front door and jerk it open, throwing yourself through it and tugging it shut behind you. You lean against the door for a moment, then exhale shakily. Inside, you can hear Adrian coming closer to the front door. You’re already ready to turn around and pull it back open, because this doesn’t solve things, and you just— If you can just get Adrian to communicate, to tell you what’s happening, then you can both fix this.

You can’t give up. You see that now, you see it clearly. In the heat of the moment, yeah, you just— You shouldn’t have done that— You needed space, but you need him more.

Adrian’s on the other side of the door, and you turn to open it before he can.

But a hand wraps around your mouth and nose from behind, jerking you backwards into a sharp grip. There’s a burn of pain in your throat, and then a sting in your sinuses, and then everything completely vanishes.

When you wake up, it’s cold. You think— You think you’re lying down on something— hard. Something solid. You blink, but there doesn’t seem like there’s any change in the light, just darkness to darkness. It feels like there’s a vibration nearby; you come to realize it’s a sound, and then you understand it’s a voice, halfway through speaking.

“—n’t manage to capture both,” the rough voice is saying. It’s a low pitch, crawling under your skin, echoing nearby like you’re underwater, shimmering through stone. “Vigilante escaped. But—”

There’s harsh lights behind your eyelids, suddenly, and you flinch, eyes flying open instinctively, squinting against whatever’s happening, shocked.

“We do have his partner,” the voice continues. You can see the shadowed outlines of two people, though it’s hard to focus in the aggressive lights. You see them at a strange angle; you belatedly realize you’re laying on the floor.

You start to move, but there’s pressure around your throat, your wrists, your ankles, your waist. You realize you can’t actually move, your body pinned and trapped, kept close to the ground. Panic starts to eat at your chest, confusion and terror erupting inside of you. You lash at your restraints, but the metal bites at your skin.

“He’ll come,” they say again. “And when he does, we’ll get Peacemaker and Waller’s daughter.” A sharp pain sparks through your leg in a jolt, and you cry out, twitching backwards. “A stepping stone. We can lead him here with them.”

“What are you thinking?” a different voice asks, scraping against the insides of your bones. Your teeth hurt hearing it, metal-strange.

There are footsteps, then a beat. A hand is touching your face, then, and you jerk, twitching away, trying to pull back so you can see what’s happening. The hand grips you tighter then, and then there’s a tug on your hair, a chunk being lifted, considered— and then yanked out, and you cry out at the lance of pain through your skull.

“First clue,” the low voice says, near to your ear. You can’t look up, cheek pressed down to the cold floor, throat clamped down to keep you still, shaking.

You don’t understand, but you do; they want Chris and Leota, for obvious reasons, and Adrian’s an easy way to get to them, and you’re an easy way to get to Adrian—

Or, you were. He doesn’t want you now, and you left, and you don’t— You don’t know if he’s even going to come. What if he didn’t open the door at all? What if he just thinks you left and never came back? What if he doesn’t come—

Your chest hurts, but you realize that’s the best option. If he doesn’t come, then he’s safe. Not only that, but the entire team is; Chris and Leota aren’t in danger, and the 11th Street Kids are safe. Adrian’s friends— the people who have become your family— will all be protected if they don’t come for you. It’s painful, but it’s the only choice.

It’s a fair trade. It doesn’t— You wish it wasn’t this way, but, over the days that you’re trapped in this place, you come to understand this is the only way.

The people keeping you try to get information from you, but they don’t know you’re already mentally resigning yourself to dying for this if you have to. You’d sooner let them kill you than give up the people you love, even if you were on the verge of losing them all anyways. You still love them; you’re not going to let anything happen to them as long as you have a say in it. Even in the worst circumstances, you think any of them would do the same for you. Even Adrian.

You have to hope they won’t come now. That he won’t come now. You love him. You still love him, even now; maybe you love him even more now.

When they hurt you, it’s not— It’s not easy, to take the pain, but it’s easier, knowing that it’s for them. Knowing that every second of pain you experience is a second Adrian is spared feeling that same agony is one of the only things that gets you through this. It hurts, but you can do it for him.

You would’ve married him, you think, when they’re holding your head underwater, and you close your eyes and think about him and don’t confess anything. You would’ve lived with him forever, you think, when your joints are wrenched and your knees finally break after days of nearly giving. You would’ve loved him until you died— and you will, you think, when the air is knocked from your lungs and you lose consciousness again and wake up cold and confused and alone once again.

You don’t know how long it takes. The schedules they keep here are confusing, inconsistent. It’s been days, you know, but you’re not sure how many.

The first thing you realize is that you’re alone longer than you normally are. At first, you think it’s a new ploy. You’re left in the total and absolute darkness, shaking, pinned to the ground. You’re hungry, and you wonder if this is their plan, maybe: to let you starve on the cold stone floor in here, trapped in place, until you go insane and tell them everything without even realizing you’re speaking.

In that darkness and lonely silence, you wonder what you’d tell Adrian if you go to talk to him one more time. You think you’d apologize, tell him you’re sorry that your last conversation was such a mess. You have so much time to think about it; you consider your conversation, your argument, in a million different ways, deciding what you want to say to make it all better.

You’d tell Adrian you love him, and that whatever he was feeling, you just wanted to hear it, and you’d work it out together, no matter what it is. You’d apologize for getting upset, and ask him why he was pulling away. You’d hope you could move past this, if you had the time.

You know you won’t have the time. You just want to say you’re sorry, to tell him you love him, to hear him say he loves you one last time.

You close your eyes, turning your face down as much as you can, letting the aching wounds on it press into the grit of the floor, dirt snagging in the edges of your face. You sigh, just trying to be calm. There’s not much you can do except just breathe, and think, and hope, and dream. You think about Adrian, as if you can feel his arms around you again.

Down the hall, there’s a slam. You wait for the inevitable opening of the door, the pain that will follow. You wonder what it will be next. You know, ultimately, it doesn’t matter, because Adrian won’t be feeling that pain, so it’s okay.

The door does finally open. You brace, waiting for the pain, squeezing your eyes closed, waiting.

Instead, you hear a breathless noise.

“Down here!” a familiar voice calls, but— not one of the familiar voices from here. One of the ones from before, and you start shaking when you recognize it as John’s.

“No,” you groan into the floor weakly. “No, no, don’t— Don’t do this to them, please, please don’t hurt them, I’ll— I’ll do anything, just—”

There’s a hand on your shoulder, and you cry out, shaking, throat aching. You can’t help the sobs that come up, begging, “No, please, don’t—”

The hand snaps away from you, and John’s voice speaks again, saying, “Oh, shit, I’m so sorry. You’re gonna— You’re gonna be okay. We’re going—”

“No,” you whisper to him. You try to breathe, then push your eyes open as well as you can. “You guys have to get out. They’ve been trying to find you. They want to get to Leota, you— You have to go—”

“We know,” John says. “They’re all dead, it’s fine. Your boyfriend made sure of that.”

You can’t process that, for a second. Then, you think, Adrian, in a rush, and you sob into the floor, hands grasping against nothing.

“Is he okay?” you ask him, aching. “Please, is—”

“What? Yeah, he’s fine,” John says. “You know you’re chained to the floor, right?”

You huff a humorless laugh, shaking.

“I’m just making sure you know,” John points out. “Because you are the one we gotta make okay here.”

There’s suddenly noises in the hall, and then Chris is there, huge and filling the doorway and you think this is too good to be true, this can’t be real. You’re terrified, but if they’re right— If they’re all dead, if you’re really safe— They can get you out of here and maybe it’ll be okay. Even if— Even if they don’t want you anymore— If Adrian makes you leave— At least you’ll all be okay. You can have that.

Chris comes closer and says, “I’m gonna rip these off, okay?” and you nod as best as you can against the floor.

He starts at your ankles, tears one free with wriggling tugs until it’s yanking out of the floor. When he starts working on the next tight chain, your other ankle getting worked free, your eyes squeezed shut, you hear more boots in the door.

“Oh, God, no,” Adrian’s voice says. Tears spring up again, burning your eyes. You want, more than anything, for him to come to you, but you don’t know if he’ll want you after—

You don’t even have time to finish the thought before Adrian’s hand is gently touching your head as he falls to his knees beside you. He says, “Please, don’t— J— Are th—”

“They’re alive,” John tells him, as Chris snaps off the next ankle chain. He moves up to your arms next.

“Hey,” Adrian says, his hand gently laying on your cheek. “Hey, hey, I’m here. I’m right here, I got you, okay? It’s all gonna be okay, we’re gonna get you out of here— Oh, fuck.” His hands go to the bindings around your throat. “Chris, can—”

Chris leaves your arm for a moment to go to your throat. Adrian holds your shoulder, his thumb stroking along the edge of a bruise.

“You’re okay,” Adrian tells you. “You’re okay, it’s okay. Breathe. You’ll be okay. I’ve got you now, I’m not gonna let you go. Nothing bad’s gonna happen to you, I got you.”

With Adrian bracing you, Chris breaks the bindings pinning you to the ground, the chains coming apart in his hands, a bite against your skin that quickly vanishes. You suck in a breath, and shift your head. The muscles scream, and Adrian’s gloved hands hold your cheeks, gentling you. You can finally flick your eyes up to him, and you see the Vigilante mask. You meet the red visor, and you can feel tears streaming down your face.

“Please don’t leave me here,” you beg him, black eating up the corners of your vision. “Adrian—”

“Oh, no, hey, no,” Adrian hurries to say. “I’m gonna take care of you. Nothing bad is going to happen to you, I’ve got you now, I’m not leaving you anywhere, okay?”

You exhale shakily. Upwards, you tell him, “I love you,” before your voice breaks and you say, “I’m sorry—”

“No, no, hey,” Adrian cuts you off. Chris breaks the last chain holding you to the ground, and Adrian’s lifting you into his arms in the next beat, lifting you up against his shoulder, into his lap.

“Don’t leave me,” you beg again. “I don’t want—”

“Hey, I’m not leaving,” Adrian promises. Your tears don’t stop, and Adrian promises, “I mean it, I’m not, I—” He looks away, then back, red visor meeting your eyes. “It’s so fucking stupid, you’re going to be mad at me, I hate myself, but I was trying to ask you to marry me and all I did was fuck everything up and I didn’t tell you and then you were gone and I couldn’t—” Adrian sucks a breath in, wet on the other side of the haze between you. “Please, I’m not— I’m not trying to break up with you, I’d never, I love you. I was being fucking stupid and I never should’ve let you go, I can’t— I love you. I love you,” and then his hand is cupping the back of your head.

His mask presses to your forehead, then to your mouth, where his mouth should be. That encroaching blackness seeps closer to the center of your vision, gnawing away your consciousness. You’ve been here a while, you realize, and your racing heart isn’t doing you any favors. You can’t see well. It’s hurting, but— less, now, so it’s easier.

“Hey,” Adrian says. “Hey, hey, keep— Keep your eyes open, look at me. Look at me—”

You can’t. You want to, and you try, but you don’t have a choice. It happens to you; you’re awake, and then you’re not, slipping away from the vague outline of Adrian’s eyes through the Vigilante visor, not sure if you ever even saw him at all, or if this was one last dream before you finally let go.

In this sleep, you dream. They’re not fully formed, just shapes and colors and nonsense and feelings, but they give you the illusion of time passing, and you rest in this sleep. It’s a healing sleep, cleansing.

When you wake up, you almost do feel rested. You shift, coming into your body in pieces, awareness seeping in like a fog that creeps away.

You open your eyes last. You blink upwards, and see white and grey and blue. It’s unfamiliar, and your frown, turning your head to the side. There’s a crinkle under your head, and a teal curtain to your right.

There’s also a hand in yours. You shift to look towards that feeling, instead, and you see Adrian slumped forward in a chair beside your hospital bed. The side has been lowered to let Adrian rest his upper body on the mattress, his hand in yours, his cheek pillowed on your thigh. His glasses are at an angle, half-hanging off his face, and he’s dead asleep, breath fanning warm from his parted lips over your thighs through the sheet and hospital gown covering you.

You shift gingerly. The haze that had been eating at you when you were trapped in that facility is finally gone, your mind clear again. You’re not sure what they were dosing you with, but clearly it was something, because you can’t help noticing its absence.

Reaching up with your other hand, you realize your forearm is in a cast. You frown, but your fingers are still free, so you keep reaching for him anyway.

You thread your fingers through his hair, just reveling in the way the soft curls twist around your fingertips. You stroke your thumb along his hairline, then down to his cheek, shifting to fix his glasses for him.

His brow twitches, and then he’s blinking, his eyes flickering as he yawns and returns to himself. As he awakens, he slowly becomes aware, his hand tightening in yours.

When he realizes you’re not only holding his hand back, but stroking his hair and looking up at him, he’s surging upwards, cupping your face in his hands. He lets you go just to take you again, kissing you hard before drawing away, kissing your cheek, the corner of your mouth, your temple, your ear, and then back again to your cheek, your jaw, your chin, your lips.

“I love you,” he says against your mouth. “I’m so sorry, I’m so, so sorry, you have to know I love you. I can’t lose you, okay? And it doesn’t matter if— It doesn’t matter if everything’s perfect, it doesn’t matter if I don’t propose perfect, that stupid— That stupid book doesn’t fucking matter, I’ll just— I want to marry you,” he insists to you.

He scrambles for his pocket, then pulls a ring out. No box, no bag, nothing. Just a loose ring that he holds up in his hand between you, offering it to you in a thrust forward.

“I love you,” he repeats. “I want to marry you, please, if you’ll still have me. If you still want me. I’m so sorry I fucked up, but I promise, I promise I won’t fuck up again. I’ll tell you everything, and I’ll never try to keep something from you again, and if I want to surprise you, I’ll just— I won’t— I won’t let it get that far again, I swear, I didn’t get it but I do now, I really do, I was thinking about it this whole time and I’m sorry—”

You use as much of your strength as you can to push forward into him and seal him in another kiss. You tilt your head just enough to angle it right, and his returning kiss is desperate, biting into you. His jaw is loose, his kiss turning sloppy when he makes a broken noise into your mouth.

“I’m so sorry,” Adrian whispers to you. “I didn’t get it. I didn’t— But I do now.”

You’re just trying to breathe, to process this. It feels like you’re dreaming, but this is more than a dream. Everything you ever wanted, and, somehow, it’s reality.

“You fucker,” you rasp. “You were trying to surprise me?”

It’s so fucking stupid. It’s so fucking Adrian. Your chest swells; you can barely fucking breathe, right now, looking at him like this.

His face is splotched pink as he explains in a rush, “I wanted to propose and I told Chris that and he told me that I should do some fucking research before just doing that so I found this book, right, and it said to plan the perfect proposal, and I kept trying and it kept getting fucked up and I couldn’t do it, and then you thought I was leaving and I would— I would never leave,” he tells you, firm, hard, loving, determined. “I would never leave. I felt like I was going fucking crazy without you, thinking that— Thinking you were thinking I don’t love you, that I would leave, because I would never. And that stupid fight, God, I am so fucking sorry, I shouldn’t have— I should’ve told you right then and there, but I was still trying, and I shouldn’t have been. I should’ve told you right there that I— I love you. That I love you, and I want to spend my life with you, and I want to marry you, and if you hate me because this happened to you because of me, I get it, I do, and I love you, and I’d— You can do anything you want, anything. But I love you. I love you,” he tells you, eyes burning, just like yours are. “It’s more important I have you than do this perfectly. I was so scared I’d never get to do this at all.”

“Adrian,” you breathe. There are tears on his face, which— You almost never see that. They smear hot on your cheeks when he presses into you, kissing you again, his face a crumpled scrunch as he kisses you with ferocity, determined to keep you.

He separates from you and offers you the ring again. “I’d get if you said no, but—”

“Yes,” you tell him, throat rasping. “I— Yeah. Adrian, yes, please, yes—”

Adrian slides in for another kiss, slotting together perfectly with you. His lips part, and he sighs, then smiles, dragging to kiss you in the space right under your eye. His hands slip to your arm, your wrist, your hand, your fingers, and he slides the ring on, not letting you separate from him.

“It’ll be okay,” Adrian promises you. “I love you.”

In the next days, you’ll tell Adrian everything that happened to you while you were there. He’ll hold you when you tell him about every pain you endured, when he asks about every injury he finds. When your tears burn hot and overflow again, he kisses each mark on your skin, doesn’t release you until you can breathe again.

In return, he tells you what happened in your absence. He tells you about opening the door and finding you being taken, about fighting to take you back only to see you taken into a van and driven away while he was waiting. He’d tried to run after you, but someone had tried to shoot him, and he tells you how he detoured, half-conscious, to find Chris and regroup. He tells you about days spent searching for you with the rest of the team, countless hours spent. He tells you about the people he killed with satisfaction, relishing that their loss has led to your return. The rest of the 11th Street Kids will fill in the gaps, and they’ll take turns sitting with you, and they’ll tell you all, in their own special ways, just how much you matter to them, even if it’s not in so many words.

Leota will thank you, and kiss your cheek, and read quietly with you when you’re too exhausted to speak. John plays games with you until you’re laughing with hysteria, having too much fun to think about the pain. Emilia puts the television on and only talks occasionally, though she holds your hand most of the time. Chris brings music, and rags on you most of the time, and you can’t help smiling at him. Adrian never leaves, refusing to move from your side, often correcting their stories and recounting his side of things instead.

He tells you then, too, about finding you in that place, and you tell him about finding him in return, and you know it’s going to be okay. You know, now, that he’s not going anywhere, that you’re not going anywhere. When he kisses the scar that winds around your throat, you remember not a fleeting moment of dread and doubt, but the overwhelming, consuming heat of his love instead, saving you in all ways, allowing you to save him in return.

“I love you,” he says all the time, now, just to make sure you hear it. It’s the first and last thing he says every time he sees you, even if he’s just leaving the room and reentering. He wants to make sure you know, that you never think otherwise.

“I love you,” you tell him all the time, now, just to be sure he knows. It’s the first and last thing you say every time you see him, even if you’re just going to sleep and waking up again. You want to make sure he knows, that you never think otherwise.

“I love you,” he says, and “I love you,” you always reply, because there is nothing more important than knowing and acknowledging and feeling that, as often as you can, as fiercely as you can.

adrian chase taglist:

@violetrainbow412-blog @bigassbisaster @amysuemc @sunflowerfive @papitas-con-sal @saturnngal @neptuneswritingwork @jewishdelis @myguiltypleasures21 @pinkygunslingy @violinchick @r3tr0sp3ct @chaseadrian @breathing-in-waves @rishlurh @x-milf-hunter-x @goblynnrockz @theowritesstuff @jaysfav @themartiansdaughter @dallasvakarian @missscarlettangel @pieriinova @samantha24015 @hillaryroadheadcllinton @ohmybubbletea @buckys-estrella @witchywcmans @ladyrebel25

#answered #anonymous #prompts #adrian chase imagine #adrian chase x reader #adrian chase #vigilante imagine #vigilante x reader #vigilante #peacemaker imagines #peacemaker imagine #peacemaker tv #peacemaker #hbo peacemaker #dcu #dceu #dc comics #dc #honeycombstrawberry

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survivorelsalvador · 7 years

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EPISODE 1 - An Army Of Porn Pete (TM) - Josh (Camp)

(If a confessional is just a gif or a picture then it was most likely Veronica, winner of Jeju Island, uwu <3)

WILLA

One world? This is going to be an iconic mess and I can't wait to see how this turns out.

WILL

Will she decapitate me or will we work together: The Regan/Will love story begins all over again (for when these go public I have nothing against you Regan you're a queen in my eyes)

DANA

How quickly are you trying to kill me. First of all: I literally know 99% of these people and am playing in Athena with them right now, which makes my game in each more complicated. On my tribe: Me, Chris, Willow, Willa, and Austin The only person I don't know is Austin. I'm aligned with Willa in another game and was aligned with Chris in the same game. Willow and I were friendly in Solomon Islands. Hopefully this puts me in a good spot. Other than that, going through the rest of the cast on other tribes: Playing with in Athena right now: Adrian, Kai, Lily, Jaiden, and Nicholas. I'm in an alliance with all of them except Adrian (who might not like me after tonight). From Solomon: Zakriah, my literal child and snapchat streak buddy. He's also vv close with Willow, so this is good. Potential alliance? From Great Lakes: Kyle and Ashton. Idk Ashton AT all. We were never on a tribe together. Heard he's pretty good at orgs though. Kyle and I didn't super get along in GL. I voted him as first merge boot, he voted me, and I went home. I've also heard a lot about Regan and i'm excited to meet her. Basically I know/ have a relationship with half of the cast, so this should be INTERESTING. I'm excited.

JAKE

So the game hasn't even officially started yet and I formed a tight bond with Kyle and Lexi. I feel that we all relate to each other pretty well, so I like where this is going.

LEXI

Ok so i already have an alliance with ribsor and jake. I know jake from a mini we played together and we bonded right away. I also know regan,austin and jaiden from the other tribe. I have a good relationship with all 3 so that made me happy seeing them. I hope they can stay and fight until merge. Heck i hope i can stay and fight until merge. this is a small tribe so thats alittle scary. Also this one world crap aint working for me. I cant talk to that many people and keep up. I'm in another tumblr game and hosting a skype org...so its hard to keep up. But i try my hardest and im just glad i got in an alliance already.

WILL

I actually feel pretty good so far like I think I'm on the good side of mostly everyone on my tribe - two of them played with me before two of them don't know me - and I'm already sensing some tension between certain people so like... this will be a good one lol. Plus I have Nicholas on my side through one world and I've made some other lowkey connections so it's all going great for the first day

KAI

Been a pretty quiet day, no ones really spoken much so kinda worried but oh wwll

JOSH

OKAY. Hello. I'm here to confess and such for the round since I haven't just yet. I'm feeling pretty okay on my tribe so far? I know Regan from previous experiences and we're friends and I think that Jaiden knows he isn't super popular so he'll rely on me to kind of keep him safe? I"m talking with Will a lot and I enjoy him so I'm glad to have him here. The only person I'm not feeling really great about is Zakariah so far? I'm not sure how close he is with other people, so I have to wary about just throwing his name out. But, if I had to choose someone to be at the bottom of the totem pole on our tribe.. It'd be him. He's not super active. I can also see Jaiden being a bit of a flop and being first to die, so I'm just going to kind of figure out where people STAND here right now and figure it out later. Because I don't imagine us being on these tribes of five for too long, so I just need to make sure that I do my best to survive here while I still can. I'LL HAVE MORE THOUGHTS AFTER I TALK MORE STRATEGY BUT I NEED TO WORK ON IMPROVING MY SCORE

DANA

my new aesthetic in games is to just talk to the hosts in host chat instead of the players because i love them more. <3 Rob

WILLOW

I'm just gonna do a cast assessment rn bc why not Dana- Ahh we played in Solomon together and I love her, she's so sweet! Austin- We talked a lot last night and he's really nice, and has a good taste in survivor opinions Chips- Hasn't messaged me back yet and has only talked in the tribe chat twice Willa- Seems cool, but didn't talk to me for very long Also I'm confused about what happened during the "fight" in One World Also One World is too much at the beginning so I might just stick to talking to the people on my tribe first, and then once theres a swap I'll start talking to the other people idk.

ADRIAN

Whew El Salvador! Que tal chicos y chicas? Me llamo Adrian y yo soy no esperando nada mas por el juego para comenzar! Like this tribe a lot and really, I see 2 people from other games that are running side by side on my tribe, and really its cool to see that people are willing to work with me. But there is the downside of having people being inactive on the Apopa tribe, and really I'm not ready for shit like that to happen so quickly.

Of course it would be One World this season. I see alot of familiar names and faces and I'm already thrilled to start this game, until I see Regan. Is it possible to hate a bitch because of how negatively she rubs people upon meeting them? Wait, hold that thought. Yeah. Its very possible.

Its not even the end of Day 2, and already this bitch is asking for me to rip her head off. Like I don't give a flying fuck. Don't slander my name when you don't know me either. Fuck. Seriously, don't go preaching shit you won't practice. Regan's asking for a verbal beatdown, in English and in Spanish.

Keep it up Regan, and I will end you before you have a chance to be on a tribe with me. I am not someone to fuck around with and I don't care how many people would say that I should apologize to her. I guess I can't play more subtly now cause I just ended the living shit out of her. Oh btw, she can have her wig back. There's like pieces of scalp like attached to it.

(Note: Each paragraph was its own confessional)

DANA

My tribe is killing me with this challenge. Why did none of them start until like 7hrs before it is due when none of them know any Spanish and this challenge is semi-all about putting in time. Me right now: trying to make up for literally everyone's scores on my tribe. Quick assessment of my tribe? (Even though I knew everyone except Austin before we got here) Austin: Putting in a lot of effort to be friendly, which is good. Probably will want to work with him honestly but betraying someone I am already friendly with to do this will be hard. Chips: Isn't speaking to anybody. Why? Idk ur guess is as good as mine honestly. Willa: Honestly a fav. He better want to work with me here. Willow: My queen. My thoughts on one world? IT IS HYSTERICAL. Pls bring Regan back so she and Adrian can fight more and I can intervene with lighthearted comedy. Honestly I love problems and drama, sign me up pls.

LILY

Hi! So I don't know what I'm doing playing two games cause it ain't my style but I'm trying. So far I really like jake on my tribe because he is also a Michigander and that makes you awesome. I also like will a lot but he isn't on my tribe sooooo. Yeah. Also I suck at Spanish. So yeah.

AUSTIN

I know nobody on my tribe. So far I want to work with Willow and Dana!! Honestly I'll probably be the first boot but my goal is to make the tribe swap I guess. I know Lexi ribbons and Jake I hope I play with them :)

WILLA

Dana is a lesbian? oh cool

JAIDEN

I have nothing to tell the world about my experience... yet.

MICHEAL

Dana is a lesbian which is not a suprise i mean have you seen her profile pic anyway in the game i made no connections i know what a great way to start the game but tonight i plan on making them

NICHOLAS

KAI

WOOO! WE WOOONNNN! That's pretty awesome!

RREGAN (That’s how she spelled it in the confessional hehe)

im perfect ill send one after bbhell ty

ASHTON

Well ugh life is good. This game on the other hand I have no idea what's going on. I've talked to richie cuz i knew him already but that's about it. Overall i'm happy im not gonna be first boot but pretty sure i'll be gone soon lol

RICHIE

who am i if i dont start off the game with my first confessional saying "i hate this fucking tribe!!!!!!!!" i've been out doing things for the last 3 days so i havent gotten a chance to do anything or really talk to anyone but i just played the duolingo immunity challenge before i went to sleep and when i was on the bus and train going to my friends lmao i didnt realize that i was the only one who was actually putting effort into it and thats sad because i really didnt play much but i guess the rest of my tribe is just full of flops!!! ashton i played with before we didnt talk much and we voted for eachother but i like them hope we can talk kai i talked to a little but like..... that needs to be worked on michael is the biggest flop ive ever met they are perfect first boot material if i leave before them i'm never playing another game and nicolas seems cool thats it! uneventful first week my social game is weak nothing happened not much to report but whew

KYLE

this host sucks

NICHOLAS

hello i am excited for this game but my tribe is dry as fuck besides richie

#ididntconsent

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