#i know she isnt thought of very highly in the fandom but still
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I may or may not feel a bit sorry for her…
#i know she isnt thought of very highly in the fandom but still#hear me out#her story is kinda tragic#idk maybe ill expand on by thoughts abt her later#american arcadia#vivian walton#emily garland#art
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okay so. skirk thoughts
first of all: as much as her design is still just kind of an ehhh compared to what couldve been, i do think it looks so much better in the actual game. the sfx in her arms and legs in particular helps a Lot imo. still not a massive fan but given i already loved the hair+eyes as well as the general color scheme, im warming up to it. still unfortunate we didnt get something more ambitious but i can live with this lmao
personality wise i actually really love how they went about her? its a little unexpected but skirk really has that abyss autism rizz to her JSJSIDISGFK love it. like this really isnt someone used to any manner of regular human interactions and it shows. i really like how blunt and utterly unfazed she is even when dropping some insane lore bombs bc theyre just peanuts to her. shes just completely unlike any character from any faction weve encountered before and i rly love the energy they gave her
i also found her little ramble about the value of life and death pretty interesting. it almost makes it sound like she considers herself dead in some way? with how she talks about there being no point in holding onto the bonds and remains of dead things and how this personal philosophy of hers is why she never comes to the surface anymore. like huh. whats up with that.
it also really reminds me of how an underappreciated aspect of childes characterization imo is how like. Incredibly insistent he is on staying alive being the most valuable thing? like this comes up Repeatedly in his voicelines. and now we have skirk literally talking about how to live is in itself a blessing. like i am Not buying this being coincidental at all. so unless they physically disprove me in this somehow down the line im taking this as 100% proof that childes high regard for life is Directly imparted to him through skirks teachings. and thats really interesting to think about.
and like. overall im quite happy with this glimpse of her character we have? i have bigger issues with the overall handling of the childe+narwhal+skirk segment of the AQ but those are narrative problems. skirk really stands out as a character and shes just. really fascinating AND funny as fuck in her nonchalance like. what an icon.
the only real unfortunate thing w her appearence specifically i think just has to do with the way her manner of speech and position as a narrator of dubious reliability to an extent is already leading to some. Quite unfortunate misreadings and/or taking the implications of her statements too far at face value. and i just know fandom will latch onto those forever 😭
(& jic i dont mean dubious reliability in the traditional unreliable narrator or like. lying or sth sense. just that her worldview is so alien and foreign to us that it should be taken into careful account before just blindly running off with any particular thing she claims)
like. firstly. the narwhal. ppl really dont seem to be catching onto how skirks perception of it as just a scuffed pet thats a hassle to manage isnt like. actually reflective of what a massive deal of an entity it is (read the boss fight quest item drop lore i am begging. or just wait for me to start narwhalposting JAJSKDK its coming 100%) 💀💀 what it DOES reflect more than anything is what an absolute maniac surtalogi (+ skirk by extension) has to be in order to claim a creature of this magnitude as a PET of all things. its also good to note that skirk herself readily admits both her highly unconventional view on most things AND that her master wont necessarily share any and all information with her - more so what he thinks is pertinent for her to know. her assessment of the narwhal as a nuisance of a task for a disciple isnt really reflective of the ultimate big picture HSJDKDKSK though it is very funny i have to admit.
im just preemptively annoyed and frustrated by it already bc its highkey giving azhdaha all over again where 99% of fandom just dismissed his deeper lore bc they took the storytellers claims of zhongli creating him at complete face value. like to the point hoyo had to literally add a whole segment at the end of the chasm interlude where zhongli more or less directly wink wink nod nods that a career entertainer isnt giving you the most accurate lore on this stuff 😭😭 like please. ive had the tears from among the stars lore fucking HAUNTING me ever since i first read it. its not just a silly pet whale im hhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh
and secondly. people really jumping the gun on "haha skirk thinks childe weak" when she was... quite literally speaking in past tense JSJSKDKSISKDK thats ajax 14 not the current state of things. while i do agree skirks power level is still way above his to the point i absolutely do think she considers him weak from her standpoint & ways off from his true potential, id also just.... like to point out that she pretty much confirms that her view of his competence has very much changed too? like please yall
skirk, who in all the years post ajax' 3 day abyss trip made NO effort to contact or keep up with him whatsoever and stated that her disciple wasnt worth even speaking to in the past has now LITERALLY voiced the intent to assign him the task of being a messenger between herself (possibly even surtalogi) and neuvillette. and she has made it VERY clear that she views the communication between herself and neuvillette (and traveler too) as one between equals?
this isnt her assigning childe some irrelevant side quest to keep him busy but actually utilizing him for a task she takes at least relatively seriously. like wdym she still considers him the exact same as before 😭😭😭😭 like obviously childes far off from being regarded as anywhere near an equal by skirk bc SHES just that insanely powerful but seriously. to me this is as clear an acknowledgement of his growth on her part as we will get JSJSKDKFKSKDKJ
but alas. everyone loves a "ha ha childe so weak XDDDD" like they just never wanna let that one go. Man
anyway still rly like skirk!!! all im Really hoping for in the future Especially w how i feel the 4.2 narrative while overall brilliant really sidelined and mishandled the potential and gravity of the narwhal side of things is that like. PLEASE let the interlude be the continuation to this 3rd descender n skirk n childe abyss situation i am so fucking tired of khaenri'ah and the abyss order im sorry lmao
also itll be like 4 years before we ever see her in Real action as a combatant but i am already So hype to see that. especially since her powers are so abyssal and alien in nature like thats going to be So gourmet i just know it.
#whew. that eas a bit.#but like im sooooo happy i ended up liking her as much as i did . i really worried i would end up let down somehow bc#skirk has been such a mysterious lore figure in the bg all this time and that by itself builds hype that can end up just falling flat#but im really glad im just even more invested in her situation now that shes finally made an appearancr#just hope we can get at least some interactions between her n ajax sooner than later.#ALSO. YEA THAT WAS A LETDOWN. disciple suits ok its fine but man i wish shed call him ajax 😭😭 hopium she still does when its at his face#rambles#genshin#genshin spoilers#4.2 spoilers#long post
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am i the only one that thinks its crazy when women target popular gay men (or gay/ace/aro insinuated) men with romantic language? because to me its more of a realization that that person loves that character a lot and yet has absolutely no grasp on them as a person or concept. like, im not judging you, because thats your babygirl or whatever, but youve just twisted the image of that babygirl to fit your own notion; its no longer that same character/person anymore.
a lot of this was brought on by a Troye Sivan & Charlie xcx concert i went to a few days ago. there was a girl behind us screaming "thats my husband!" and other various romantically charged quips at him. which i never understood. why are you here? you cant not know that hes gay. if youre attending a concert of his, and comfortable enough to state hes your husband, you have to know hes gay. so why do it? am i taking this too literally? is it just one of those things that "people just say" and there is no deeper meaning behind it? the whole time i couldnt help but to think "girl, you are barking up the wrong tree" which was ironic because i think during "Rush" she was growling and barking at him as well. Also, side note, i love Rush's music video a lot.
this is a lot longer than i thought it would be. more below.
ever since then i realize that the same thing happens very frequently with fictional characters as well. I guess it just depends what fandom im in at the time, but obviously right now dungeon meshi is taking over my frontal cortex like spreading necrotic tissue. Laios specifically, people seem to do similar things with him. i think its because hes relatively 'malleable' as a character— hes easy to project onto and thus easy to mischaracterize. theres also a common theme with him being portrayed as puppy/dog-like and needy and whiny and stuff like that. this is more so in suggestive content. Im not disagreeing with that opinion; honestly i kind of like it, but thats another contribution as to why i think people choose him for the same kind of stuff. I will often see women or very fem-leaning folks hone in on Laios, romantically. And use the same kind of language. "thats my man!" "thats my husband!" "hes so mine" etc. Things that lay romantic ownership. and again, every time i see it, i cant help but to think "girl, you are barking up the wrong tree"
then again, self-ship has always been a little lost on me, so maybe thats where im not understanding. I dont dislike people who do it and i dont dislike it as a concept, i just dont understand why you would use that kind of language with a person who would realistically never be romantically interested in your gender. Obviously, Laios isnt canonically gay, but its highly insinuated he is both queer and autistic. and a lot of people who use the aforementioned language are, in turn, mischaracterizing him. Or at the very least ignorant to his coding and nuance within the character. This ties into the whole puppy/neediness thing earlier. The autism is translated into "dumb" to them, because they want to see the submissive behavior of a male character. Thats a whole different debacle. Im very tired of people categorizing Laios as 'dumb' as a general statement.
I think its still much more acceptable thing to do overall on Laios than it is Troye Sivan though. Doing that to a real person is much much weirder.
I also understand that the point of self-ship isnt necessarily to be realistic, that its more of a comfort thing, but doesnt that also kind of take you out of it? Like, every time i get romantically attached to a character romantically, its out of realism. As in, i would be at least somewhat attracted to them in real life. And inversely they would at least not categorically deny me outright. Getting attached purely sexually to a character is a bit different. And im guilty of being led by my dick to completely unrealistic characters. But im not talking about those, because the people who do this make use of both romantic and sexual language. So its not just a led-by-the-dick thing. Its a genuine belief that not only you "understand" that character, but that when using romantic language addressing that character, it is not just an outright lie.
am i just not understanding the tone? Is the whole "thats my husband" thing a joke and not laying any kind of romantic insinuation? ive only ever seen it used as such, but it could be different on tumblr.
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#i hate the idea that Elizabeth's plan was to live off Jane#because it removes so much from her character#you can certainly argue that mrs b is pinning hopes on Jane's beauty#but Elizabeth isnt her mother and her anger over darcy separating bingley and jane isnt self serving#Elizabeth wishes to marry with mutual respect with the hopes of love#she is romantic and (dare i say it) vain in her own way#she isnt Charlotte Lucas#she isnt working out her options for a secure future#she is upset for Jane because she loves her sister and wants her to be happy#not because it was her retirement plan#she is angry at Darcy for his presumptious interference for upsetting her sister and because she hates him already!#anyway like i said i got blasted for similar sentiments on a similar post before#where it was implied that elizabeth was extra angry at darcy for removing her safett net#and i'm genuinely relieved to find i'm not just way off with my reaction/thoughts/opinion on this via @spookyohan
It's honestly an all around terrible take on Lizzy, one of the few things that can still make me fandom angry at this point in my life... and Lizzy is not even in my top 5 favorite Austen characters!
It is not helped by the fact that that post has over 15.000 notes, and that that OP blocked me after I reblogged with a disagreeing addition I thought was politely worded (and I suspect I'm not the only one that got that treatment). Judge by yourselves:
I agree here that the notion that Lizzy is betting on Jane’s marriage is a headcanon [I was adding below @bethanydelleman 's reblog], not impossible but also never explicitly supported by the text? If anything the one that thinks the Jane-Bingley marriage is a done deal is Mrs Bennet, who doesn’t stand out for her perceptiveness. On the other end Charlotte also thinks Jane is being too shy and risks losing Bingley’s interest as well. Cannot find anything like the embroidery thing OP mentions in the text. I also think separating love and respect that starkly is not very austenian (?) Esteem and gratitude are over and over again the foundations of love for Austen, and sometimes almost interchangeable. Elinor greatly esteems Edward Ferrars. Marianne marries Brandon because she esteems him and they have lively friendship between them. Tilney falls in love because Cathy was in love with him first, which reciprocation is gratitude, and so on and so forth. And for Lizzy specifically, the novel makes the connection twice: “As for Elizabeth, her thoughts were at Pemberley this evening more than the last; and the evening, though as it passed it seemed long, was not long enough to determine her feelings towards one in that mansion; and she lay awake two whole hours, endeavouring to make them out. She certainly did not hate him. No; hatred had vanished long ago, and she had almost as long been ashamed of ever feeling a dislike against him, that could be so called. The respect created by the conviction of his valuable qualities, though at first unwillingly admitted, had for some time ceased to be repugnant to her feelings; and it was now heightened into somewhat of a friendlier nature by the testimony so highly in his favour, and bringing forward his disposition in so amiable a light, which yesterday had produced. But above all, above respect and esteem, there was a motive within her of good-will which could not be overlooked. It was gratitude;—gratitude, not merely for having once loved her, but for loving her still well enough to forgive all the petulance and acrimony of her manner in rejecting him, and all the unjust accusations accompanying her rejection… She respected, she esteemed, she was grateful to him, she felt a real interest in his welfare; and she only wanted to know how far she wished that welfare to depend upon herself, and how far it would be for the happiness of both that she should employ the power, which her fancy told her she still possessed, of bringing on the renewal of his addresses.” And later on: “If gratitude and esteem are good foundations of affection, Elizabeth’s change of sentiment will be neither improbable nor faulty. But if otherwise, if the regard springing from such sources is unreasonable or unnatural, in comparison of what is so often described as arising on a first interview with its object, and even before two words have been exchanged, nothing can be said in her defence, except that she had given somewhat of a trial to the latter method, in her partiality for Wickham, and that its ill success might, perhaps, authorize her to seek the other less interesting mode of attachment.” So in the end, “Lizzy won’t marry someone she doesn’t respect” and “Lizzy won’t marry someone she doesn’t love” are one and the same thing. You can say she won’t marry just for liking someone (i.e. the way in which she vacillates about Wickham because he has no money to live on), but that’s a different thing. I don’t think Lizzy is counting on a better proposal to come along, as much as she isn’t betting on Jane’s marrying well. She’s young and there’s years still in front of her to make some sort of match. I don’t think she’s making any plans at all.
Okay but (if you don't mind--please ignore this otherwise) what is your take on the "strategical importance of Jane" post? I read it and op makes an interesting assertion about Elizabeth's plans for her life. Definitely not one I have seen before, either on Tumblr or by Austen scholars and I was wondering how you would critique it.
Here is the post. Also, I said this in the notes of that post, so this isn't a sneaky take down. I made my opinion clear to OP.
The part about Elizabeth not wanting love but respect in marriage and about her watching her parent's horrible marriage is absolutely correct and in the novel. The Gardiners would also likely help if Mr. Bennet died, though they have 4 children of their own and possibly will have more, which would stretch their funds.
Here are the problems:
This posts states that Elizabeth's backup plan is to live with a married Jane, as if this is a fact, not headcanon. It is headcanon at best, a gross misinterpretation of Elizabeth at worst. There is zero textual evidence in the book for this interpretation. And Austen has given such evidence: Anne Elliot in Persuasion thinks to herself that if her father marries she'll just live with Lady Russell.
Elizabeth does not refuse Collins because she has Jane as a fallback, she rejects Collins because she cannot marry such an idiot. She is risking genteel poverty because for her, being married to someone like Mr. Collins is worse. If you say she wasn't worried because she has a backup plan, you make her less brave and less principled.
Elizabeth has no reason to be so sure Jane will marry. Jane's been "out" for seven years now and has 1 (one) flirtation for her mom to brag about. As Austen says in another novel, "But there certainly are not so many men of large fortune in the world as there are pretty women to deserve them."
That post is a headcanon, and I think it's a very wrong one. Elizabeth is not consciously thinking to herself, "Eh, I can reject as many men as I want, because Jane will marry rich." She is just living her life as best she can, hoping to meet someone to love and marry.
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Ranking the HxH guys in my Simping Tier: Countdown
Note: This is just for fun and lame-ass humour. You are free to like anyone in hxh and this tier doesn’t reflect how great the character is. It’s just a ranking based on how much I simp for them.
14. Meruem
Okay. There’s a reason why Meruem is at the last list. He’s an ant. He’s not even fully human FML. Can’t believe people wanna fuck this teenaged mutant ninja ant. Can’t even say those people are a furry because this ant has no fur. It’s a no for me.
13. Illumi
The Illumi simps are gonna hack me for having him too low. I find him cute and has really nice hair that can be for shampoo ads... but his eyes... it covers 70% of his face. It’s guppy eyes. It’s like he wore those coloured contact lenses that enlarges the eyes.
12. Shalnark
OKay. Shalnark is cute. He’s really one of the most good looking guys in the series. However, I don’t know why but his personality is kinda “ehh”. He’s a little psycho who controls people with his phone, but somehow his personality is overshadowed by a lot of extreme characters with Hisoka. Also, I try not to get too attached to him because of what happens in the current arc.
11. Kite
Okay. This is weird but... I find Kite more attracted when he’s a red-headed female ant right now. Okay. I know I went all like “MERUEM ISNT EVEN HUMAN” but female Kite LOOKS human. She has freckles and all that. It’s real cute. But I’d say he’s a little lower because he doesn’t really have that “oomph” personality so-
10. Pariston
Now, talk about a character with FABULOUS presentation of himself. Pariston shows himself off with extravagance. NOW, that’s a personality. He’s like one of those celebs that are just so extra like Lady Gaga that it’s amazing. I know he’s underrated in the simping world, but he’s essentially kinda like Hisoka (who has a big simping fandom), only he prefers to play with people’s minds rather than fight people.
9. Tserriednich
You might be wondering, why the fuck is he here? Okay, first of all, he reminds me of Hannibal who is by the way, charming. And yes I mean it in the Mads Mikkelsen AND the Anthony Hopkins way. Makes me wanna his Clarice but I’d rather have Theta have that spot. Secondly, he’s a prince so being his bride is literally a dream come true. Thirdly, yeh, Tserriednich is actually very handsome. Nice blond hair and that facial beard.
8. Gon
He’s quite low on the tier because I had always seen him as a cute green mini-Ging. Personality-wise, he’s really sweet and I can see a lot of girls liking him because he knows how to treat women respectfully. He can even handle the crazy ones like Palm. His alpha side came out during the Chimera Ant arc and his adult form is hella attractive.
Jokes aside, this character is really amazing as an MC. It’s sad that he gets overshadowed but I believe he’s a pretty unique shounen MC because most of the time, a shounen MC doesn’t kill or has a pretty much black-and-white morality. Gon Freecss breaks that stereotype and he’s truly appreciated.
7. Leorio
Listen to me. This man is supposed to be the type of man you��re supposed to marry. Doctor, loyal, caring and funny. This man is the total package. I think the reason why he’s a little lower in my simp tier is because well... he’s the type of guy that I will go for in reality. In fiction, that’s where all my crushes for crazy guys should be. My simp tier is based on my heart, not brain.
6. Killua
Okay. I was down bad for Killua when I was younger. DOWN BAD. So down bad that it was scary. I sort of got over him now. But what can you do? Killua is simped by a lot of teenaged girls or women who had a crush on him since the beginning of time. He’s fiercely loyal, has white hair and pretty blue eyes, is a fun mixture of mischief and seriousness. He’s the type of guy you can count on to get out of trouble and one to always treasure you. I do think that if I ever meet Killua though, that he’d bully me to oblivion.
Okay, we’re at the top 5. From here onwards, some real NSFW simping words.
5. Hisoka
I kinda do understand Hisoka stans, but at the same time, I do not get them. Like him or not, he’s a very flamboyant character. He stands out of the crowd and he just have that unexplained charisma.
He’s actually a really well-written character. He’s the balancing factor in the narrative of HxH. He’s like the joker in the deck of cards. Back to my simp tier, he’s very attractive ESPECIALLY with his hair down. There’s a certain aura that is addictive about him that I can’t pin-point. And for that, he earns my top 5 spot.
4. Feitan
I swear. This simping phenomenon actually manifested from Hiei. Yes, Feitan’s character blueprint, Hiei from Yu Yu Hakusho. (The real OGs will know that Hiei is the character blueprint, not Levi). I know a lot of people compare him to Levi but let me explain why Levi and Feitan are alike: it’s because their character blueprint is Hiei.
Anyway, Hiei is HOT. And to me, the hxh equivalent is Feitan, with a huge addition of sadism and emo-ness. Okay, that makes it even hotter.
I have read some Feitan/Reader on AO3 and BOI. I enjoyed reading certain stuff that I never thought I would enjoy. I read a fic about Reader-chan getting whipped and basically all sorts of BDSM and OMG it’s heaven.
“They say all good boys go to heaven, but bad boys bring heaven to you”
3. Chrollo
At first, I didn’t really care about Chrollo until he wore that tuxedo and let his hair down (Is it just me or a lot of hxh boys look good with their hair down?). HE LOOKS SO GODLY HOLY FUCK.
I’m 100% sure that his character blueprint for the hair-down is Koenma. He also gives me Tuxedo Mask vibes. Overall, such chivalry and handsomeness all in one man. Not to mention, that sexy sexy voice when he recites his fortune-telling. I would say he has the sexiest voice among all hxh guys. He is just that HOT and charismatic. I wanna see where he hid that Spider tattoo and scratch his back.
2. Ging
Okay. Ging is hardly simp by girls. And I do not understand why?? He is motherfucking attractive. Even now. GAWD. I love him.
I think my attraction to him pre-started because he looks and acts SO much like my childhood crush Yusuke Urameshi from Yu Yu Hakusho. I know he’s an asshat but he’s a CHARMING asshat. Yeap, I said it. He is actually highly intelligent and just acts like a total haggard because he can.
It’s not just when he’s young. I STILL think he’s hot even in his 30s. He’s not that old for me to me honest. I don’t care if he’s a decade older than me because I think that’s the appeal of it. I
It’s kinda sad that he’s not that popular because I need some Ging/Reader smut content. Like, I envisioned a smut fic where the reader is like in her 20s and is strangely attracted to Ging. He’s wildly confused over this but he’s seriously considering of tapping it because his old ass haven’t had any action lately. The other Zodiacs are also confused and are convinced that he must have given some sex pollen to the reader because who the hell is sane enough to be attracted to him? (But it’s just that you need some acquired taste to actually find this man alluring). He’s one of the most fuckable characters ahhh.
And... for the last one...
Drumroll please....
1. Kurapika
Seriously, was there even a surprise.
THIS MAN IS THE AKAKU GOD. He’s beautiful, he’s sexy and fucking dominant (yes, I say he’s domineering because do you see the way he throws a hot tantrum during the whole YorkNew arc, demanding shit from his enemies, taking charge of everything?) His chains drives me nuts. I love it when he gets angry. I know he’s kinky on the inside. When he wore that tuxedo... ooof. He looks hella fine. He’s the only guy in hxh that fulfills my ala Michael Corleone mafia boss kink. I want him to ^&*(%%%*%^ (to save myself from embarrassment, I self-censored) as we attempt to repopulate the clan and produce more scarlet eyed babies, as he whispers some real degrading and possessive shit in Kurta while he tells me what to do. AHHHHH. *bye gotta go write some kuraneon porn now byeee*
#hxh#hunterxhunter#sorry im just down bad during quarantine#kurapika#akaku#kurapika akaku akaku#akaku god#ging#ging freecss#chrollo#chrollo lucilfer#feitan#this is a shitpost
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If you have the time/energy I would love to hear more of your thoughts about Az's persona! He's such an interesting character to me, and I feel like most of the theories I see about him centre around elain, and how his behaviour is mate behaviour (the double bond thing). Personally I think azriel has a lot of anger, isnt very open with his friends, and also feels like he has to be the one to fix everything (this comes out with elain but also all his relationships).
Can I just start this off by saying “what the fuck” at the double/true/created bond thing. I’ve seen some WILD shit out there in the fandom, wild.
I have been writing and deleting and copy/pasting etc. this post forever and I can’t decide how to approach it, so I hope this makes sense! I didn’t pull out a ton of quotes because tbh it’s a lot of work and I’ve read these books???? So many times. And this is tumblr, not comprehensive exams.
I would agree with your characterization of Azriel!
Anger - this comes out in really inappropriate times, and I wouldn’t be surprised if he turns his anger around on himself. We all know that Rhys described his “icy rage”, and later on his “cruel competitiveness”.
Lack of communication - yeah, when has he had a heart-to-heart with anyone in this series? When he does, it’s not about making himself feel better, or sharing his own feelings. It’s to be of service to someone else. All the IC have described trying to reach out to him in their own ways, and not being successful.
Needing to fix things - yes! I see this as his need to be of service. He’s always the first one to jump into work. It took Mor hundreds of years to get him to go to Rita’s, right? He’s a workaholic in a world with no labor laws. He always wants to be the one in charge of gathering intel, of finding people, or fixing problems. I think this is closely tied to two things: his lack of self-worth, and his anger. If he can stay busy enough and work hard enough, he can prove his worth to other people, if not to himself. This is why he loses it when Rhys or Feyre tell him that he can’t handle something.
Funny thing, but people who have followed my blog since early 2017 know that I shipped moriel hardcore. I just loved it. I wrote so much meta and fanfic. A lot of the arguments that I see now remind me a lot of arguments people used to make about moriel - and it makes sense! Az’s behavior around both Mor and Elain are eerily similar. So I thought I’d compare his behavior towards them because that can tell us about his character!
To me, his treatment of Elain (and Mor) comes down to two things:
What his mother and Mor suffered (and he was unable to prevent), and
His lack of self-worth due to abuse
Azriel and Mor didn’t know one another very long before she slept with Cassian and was left brutalized by her family. This happened when they were all in their late teens, which is not long after Azriel was tortured by his brothers, rarely let outside, and rarely got to see his mother. At the same time that Azriel sees his mother treated so poorly, he then feels intense guilt and rage at what happens to Mor. It’s enough to make him overreact in the future, any time that Mor (or another female) is in danger. So here are a bunch of examples of him being overprotective of Mor and Elain. But mostly Mor.
In acomaf, Azriel has the audacity to tell Mor no, that she can’t go to the human lands (chapter 41)
“I fought in the War, you will do well to remember-”
“No,” Azriel said again, refusing to break her stare. His shifting wings rasped against the back of his chair. “The would string you up and make an example of you.”
At the end of acomaf he is still highly protective of Mor
Azriel’s head lifted from where he was sprawled in his own blood, eyes full of rage and pain as he snarled at the king, “Don’t you touch her.”
Mor looked at Azriel - and there was real fear there. Fear - and something else. She didn’t stop moving until she again kneeled beside him and pressed a hand to his wound. Azriel hissed-but covered her bloody fingers with his own.
Then in acowar, of course, he explodes at the High Lord meeting after Eris says that Mor dresses like a slut:
Azriel stopped.
Eris gasped for air as those scarred hands loosened. As Azriel turned his face towards me-
The frozen rage there rooted me to the spot.
But beneath it, I could almost see the image that haunted him: the hand Mor had yanked away, her weeping, distraught face as she had screamed at Rhys.
And now, behind us, Mor was shaking in her chair. Pale and shaking.
And of course in acowar Azriel goes with Feyre to rescue Elain. This ties together all of his issues with Mor and his mother. IMHO, Azriel sees Elain as a second chance. He saves Elain in a way he failed to save Mor, and so he begins to transfer his need to protect and serve onto her.
Azriel’s refusal to let Mor assist in dangerous situations is similar to how he says no, Elain cannot help.
Azriel stiffened, an outright sign of temper from him as he said quietly, “There is an innate darkness to the Dread Trove that Elain should not be exposed to.”
*Note that it’s an “outright sign of temper” - not an outright sign of protectiveness, or caring, or concern, or worry.
If being protective of another character is “mate behavior” or sign of a mating bond, then Azriel and Mor would be mated. There is far more evidence of him being overprotective of her than of Elain. So while we know that mates are protective (naturally!), Azriel’s protective tendencies are coming from something else - a combination of his failures to protect his mother and Mor.
In acofas, what Cassian jokes is Az being a stickler for manners in forcing everyone to wait for Elain, Rhys explains as being related to Azriel’s mother - not Elain or Cassian.
Rhys took a bite, gesturing with his knife for me to eat. Let’s just say it hit a little close to home. At my beat of confusion, he added, There are some scars when it comes to how his mother was treated. Many scars.
Again, it seems all well and good that Az was thinking about being polite, but Rhys tells us that it’s because of Azriel’s mommy issues! Which are understandable and important, but a clear example of Azriel trying to make up for poor treatment in one woman by overreacting around another.
In the acosf POV, when Az questions why he wasn’t mated with Elain (and he can smell bonds so wouldn’t he smell his own?) it’s not so much about Elain as the fact that he feels he did everything right this time. He saved the damsel. He was of service. Elain is safe and healthy and she seems much more amenable than Mor ever has. So what did he do wrong? This is the source of his anger, combined with his loneliness and desire for a shiny lovely mating bond of his own.
When we think about Azriel’s motivations, it comes down to service and self-worth. He sees his main value or purpose as saving others from harm, and when he was barely into adulthood he failed in that duty for the two most important women in his life. Hence his need to overcompensate around Mor, and now Elain.
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deleted the last reblog bc it.....why are people like this. If putting the names of ur fave into To kill a Mockingbird makes it easier to engage in? like wtf there is literally nothing wrong with that.
And people who insist that fandom is dumber and stupider than it was "when they were younger" and how nobody engages in analysis and critical thinking anymore sound like older folks who just haven't kept up with the times for one, and also well YEAH FUCKING DUH. We in general are being bombarded with so much more bullshit than when I was a teen, and while that's partly due to the internet making this info readily available, it still means that kids in their teens and twenties are quickly (or already have) become anxiety and guilt-ridden to hell. They NEED a way to turn off their brains here and there and make the world feel a little easier to handle, a little less bad.
Apparently I need a cut bc this became long and rambly.
My ONLY beef with fandom and people in general has always been the proclivity for people and groups to be jerks for no reason at all. This is fiction we're talking about. Not history. You are being a snob over things that don't exist, congratulations you're completely irrelevant. With the exceptions of bigotry, racism and the other Big Obvious (for most) Societal No's, there is literally no reason to get your panties in a bunch over someone not sharing the same headcanons you do. FUCK I can think of at least four moots who have headcanons for Lasky that I dislike INTENSELY, but you know fucking what? I simply do not engage with that facet of their content if it bothers me badly enough. The most you will ever hear me say about like...someone saying Lasky drinks whiskey is 'Eh, I personally can't get behind that idea, but you can go ham with it.'
Aside from that like. Do what you fucking want. Write the raunchiest kinkiest fanfic you can. Turn Of Mice And Men into a goddamn She-Ra fanfic if it makes it easier for you to read. Changing the names of the characters doesn't change the actual narrative.
The whole chrome 'plug your faves names into someone else's fic' add on could be an issue for some fanfic authors, but I doubt it would be a unanimously disliked thing and it certainly doesn't indicate any moral failing or intellectual deficit of anyone who uses it...this falls in my 'check with the fanfic author as a courtesy first and respect their wishes' category. fyi if you do/want to use that for my fic? Go for it.
People need a fucking break from the trash fire that is reality. What the fuck don't some people get about this. Your entire waking existence doesn't have to revolve around critical thinking or constant improvement or analyzing every stupid little thing about something.
Now is critical thinking something people should try to cultivate? yes. It's a very good skill that can save you a lot of time and energy, and I highly recommend that everyone develop critical thinking skills. But I also think people should cultivate patience, understanding, empathy and the ability to pick their battles. I also think that people deserve spaces where they can turn all that off and go no thoughts head empty while they read some bullshit fic and try to forget that the world is quite literally burning down around them for a few hours. It isnt always solely a matter of knowing HOW to think critically, but also knowing WHEN its needed and when to just let your brain be lazy. If you focus on critical thinking and analyzing media and games n shit it can become a problem in its own right. People will start reading the stupidest shit into the most mundane of things and lose the ability to actually disengage their damn braincells and just enjoy shit.
God I could rant for ten more years about this...
tl;dr constantly analyzing all media you consume can in fact be a bad thing and everyone deserves to turn off their brain sometimes as long as they aren't actively causing harm to a person or group or perpetuating harmful ideas.
#gOD#actual rants#i hope this makes sense i have a hard time taking the concept in my head and putting it in words#usually because its complex and intertwined with about a half million other issues#nothing exists in a vacuum#aaaaaAAAAHHHH
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Can you do a little text with your opinion about the Volturi members? What you like and dislike, they personality, they story... Would be interesting! Kissessss and have a great day! 💜
Imma have a little fun and throw the very young me into the mix to. Let's see child me vs adult me's opinions on the Volturiiii.
Fun fact: I wasn't team Volturi until I was like fifteen. Before that I was team edward... I don't want to talk about that 🤔😒
Also I'm a sucker for villains. If it isn't obvious already, I like the villains more than the heroes. (We all love a bad boy though, don't we?--- TIK TOK NOW IS NOT THE TIMEE.)
So everything i say is just my opinion and should be taken just as that.
Aro: Younger me was like "this...is a terrible person. There really is no need to expand on this." However adult me has been like "GUYS this guy is possibly the SCARIEST character. This man rips off heads AND SMILES ABOUT IT." He gives me child snatcher vibes (from the movies in particular). I thoroughly enjoy the power hungry persona. He's really fitting to be the puppeteer behind the Volturi. Even if he makes it seem it's a group effort with himself, Marcus and Caius. Realistically, Aro gets what he wants and isn't afraid to do what it takes to get it...sorry Didyme. What's even darker about it, WHICH I LOVE, is that he isn't heartless. Smeyer wrote that Aro genuinely loved his sister. It's all good to have a character that's a evil heartless monster but what's more terrifying to me is the ability for someone to do evil despite their love and emotions. It doesn't hold them back and that's what I find particularly frightening now that child me didn't comprehend. Micheal Sheen, from what I remember of his interview years ago, played on the idea that vampires of Aro's age kinda begin to lose their mind. Which, hell freaking yes. However there is one thing I hate for Aro's character that happened in the movies. Breaking dawn part 2. That fucking laugh. Don't get me wrong, hilarious. I can't not laugh but for his character I felt it was too 'hey hey I'm a crazy man hehe'. It was a but too much, even for an eccentric Aro. However, I'm not to mad at it because again, it was funny to watch. I thoroughly enjoy the ‘friendship’ Aro and Carlisle share and i love that it is ‘maintained’ throughout the books. I think it’s just a really nice detail. (I love lore. I am a sucker for it.) The one thing that didnt sit right with me is Aro marrying someone so that he wasnt the alone one whilst his co-leaders were very much in love? Was a little off for me but i suppose that just adds to the character.
Caius: child me would shrink into the seat because what did I do to this man? High key still think I wouldn't want to be Caius' child because imagine doing something wrong and you get that glare? No thank you! Scary angry man. As an adult... "He's an angry boi but...DAYUM WHY IS HE SUDDENLY SO HOT?" Just...don't get angry with me. You'll get annoying real quick and you're too pretty for that. I enjoy the taking-no-shit attitude he has but felt it could have been a little more prominent in BDP2 where Aro asks if Caius' is challenging him. I full believe Caius to an extend would be like "yes, yes I am. Don't be an idiot Aro. Use that braincell!" Which is why I adore the meme vibes I see every now and then of Caius hating Carlisle because why does Aro love that blonde so much? CAIUS HAS BEEN NOTHING BUT LOYAL-- Anyways, I can totally get why Aro wants him on his team. Caius is so angry and has so much hatred that he’s a good asset to the coven, even if not having a special ability.I do find it hard to imagine that Caius is a century older than Aro though. Although I cant picture him over forty years old lol. Although i do personally enjoy the whole Caius x Athenodora route. IT’S TRUE LOVE! Okay so maybe thats a little dramatic but its better than Aro’s lmao.
Marcus: movie Marcus is absolutely not nineteen years old and that's just a fact. If anything, he's the forty year old one lmao. Child me couldn't care about this man. He was the man who said nothing and slumped on a throne. That was Marcus. That was his character summed up. Then adult me rolled in and OMG NO DON'T DO THIS TO THIS SWEET MAN. LET HIM BE IN LOVE. As an adult i definitely became more attached. I feel like i was too young back then to get why Marcus was in the Volturi. He seemed very out of place and like a filler co-leader more than anything. However as i’ve gotten older (and written for him), I recognised that's the point. That’s Marcus’ evident grief. He isn’t there by choice and losing Didyme caused him to fall out of line with the coven. He’s lost point or purpose. Almost like its become meaningless because the love of his life was gone and he couldn't save her.So what was the aims of the Volturi to protect vampire kind when they couldn’t protect their own? He couldnt protect her. I had never heard of anything like bond identification and once i had- i was shook, like it became clear why he had been so necessary in the first place. That really is handy to understand everyones bonds in a coven, he could direct Chelsea and the two alone could destroy covens by bonds alone. Marcus makes the Volturi more realistic in a lot of ways. Like in a family, there is the happy times, goofy people like Felix, the twins representing a close bond. Afton and Chelsea, love that cant be divided. The list really goes on. Marcus represents love and heartbreak, pain, loss grief, the sad moments every family goes through. In that way he makes the coven seem less invincible, a group of people who at the end of the day, have their own weaknesses and immortality doesn’t mean a perfect existence. Especially when, in my opinion, Bella fantasized about immortality and how perfect it would be. Even after her change, she waited for her happy ending because that was somehow guaranteed in some level. Which in the end, she got but not everyone gets that happy ending we all want. I also personally think Marcus is the most feeling of the Volturi, despite being apathetic. A result of heartbreak. It’s shown he can still feel more in his own ways when he voted against Renesmee being destroyed. Furthermore, he advocated that vampire hybrids were a lot like vampires. He made that relation openly before anyone. Its almost as though losing Didyme helped him value a life?
Jane and Alec: Child me thought these two were badass...and that still remains in my adult life. It’s always been uncomfortable to me that someone so young is so sadistic and powerful. Jane is the older twin with the ability of pain illusion...yikes. Her ability was evident in her human life along with Alec’s. His gift is sensory deprivation and these two were my favourites in the whole Saga. Still kind of are if im honest. I thoroughly enjoy the twins backstory. It has the most detail. I have a tag for the twins. Canon!twins is the tag for the twins in their book age. Unless this tag is present, the twins have been aged up :). They are very much canon but I put a bit more emphasis on tantrums. If they get angry, they both have tantrums. So whilst (unless tagged) they aren't children they can be very childish and these tantrums are pretty deadly. They’re also very possessive? I dont even know if thats the right word i’m looking for in all honesty. Lets say they get very attached if they like you. These two are probably the most secluded out of the whole Volturi.
Felix: Felix! High ranking guard due to strength and speed. I am a major supporter of Felix being a gladiator when he was human. He as a lighter grey cloak meaning he isn’t as high ranked but is so good at what he does that he’s been kept for centuries...and a lot of them. Personality? FINALLY, WE’VE GOT ONE WITH PERSONALITY!! (Im writing these out of order and i’ve just finished a chunk of Volturi members who have personalities as invisible as Afton.) Flirtatious and Light hearted, we love flirtatious and light hearted! Basically a comedian! Helllll yes, keep it going! Extremely vicious and highly aggressive? You know what? I still like it. He wouldn’t be a Volturi without a dark side. Cold blooded murderer. Yes. 10/10. Finally, someone Smeyer seems to actually care about. He flirted with Bella a couple of times in the books and i was FOR IT ALL THE WAY. I was very sad i saw none of it in the movies but im used to heartbreak by now. Im in this fandom after all. We were robbed of a lot. Strongest vampire in the world? I believe you, he’s also a hecking treeeeee. HE DO BE A TALL BOI. He actually makes Demetri look small and that’s still hilarious to me. Demetri is actually tall. However, if it isnt obvious we clearly traded backstory for personality. I cant get both smh. So...as i said before I fully believe Felix was a gladiator back in the day, hence his physique and height and excellent fighting abilities he has even as a vampire but then it kind of ends. I will say from the dawn of time, i don’t think Felix is the most academic man, just because of his era. I also think majority of the Volturi couldn’t read of write in their human lives and had to learn much older, most learning as vampires. Felix was one of these vampires, Although even now he isnt the most great at it. Then a wonderful writer known as @wallwriterstuff included it and now it’s canon in my eyes. I fully believe Felix is a slow reader and writing isn’t his strong suit either. Wallwriter also includes the possibility that Felix could be dyslexic which im all for too. For a very long time i’ve considered writing a dyslexic reader with the Volturi but have always hesitated because i don’t have it and wouldn’t want to upset someone for any misunderstandings or inaccuracies. However what i will say is that i think vampires would be the most understanding to humans with dyslexia. Learning things like that in later development or as an adult is difficult and they wouldnt think any less of you for struggling with reading, writing, numeracy- you name it. You’ll probably find they’re with you in the struggle at least half of the time. He’s also the goofball of the Volturi, even though he’s not really a goofball in our eyes, he’s the closest to a goofball out of the whole Volturi ...Emmett beats him in the Goofball wars.
Demetri: Oh yeah, it's Demetri's turn! So Demetri was previously in Amun's coven. When Chelsea gave him the old razzle dazzle...I've said Chelsea's gift so many times at this point it's getting old. I have two characters left after Demetri 😂😂 Anyway, with that Demetri was like "welp, I'm in the Volturi now." And now that they had a better tracker the previous one was kicked out. He isn’t much of a talker, polite and formal. He’s elegant (more graceful than i could ever be) and charming...yeah he is, you can say that AGAIN. He is also very calm, when next to Felix, i think everyone is calm but you know, we’ll say he’s a very calm person. I like how he was originally in the Egyptian coven with Amun. Given Amun’s goals this a pretty nice detail. NOW LETS GO TO MY VERSION. He’s very charming, calm, polite, formal and even a lil’ but quiet, i kept him pretty canon because he actually had a description to go on :)))))))))) Moving on. Demetri can be a very successful flirt when he wants to be and does have a Casanova reputation. However beyond the charming Volturi guard who has a brutal side like the rest of them, he has a chewy centre, deep down. I added that he had a child in his human life, one he doesn’t remember and very few people know about. He remembers that they died of an illness very young (around six?) but can’t remember what they look like. For that reason he doesn’t like talking about his child, he feels awful he doesn’t remember them and the loss still hits a pang in his chest.
Heidi: Alright im ready for this one! Child me didn’t necessarily enjoy Heidi? I was rather passive about her. It was all ‘pretty vampire used for her looks’ in my eyes back then and i was never comfortable with that. I’ll get into my take on Heidi in a moment, roll on the backstory! So Heidi knew Victoria as they used to be coven mates and we’re going to continue on as though Heidi didn’t care when she was killed? Like...its genuinely a burning question in my mind! If she didn't care, could that show the extent of Chelsea’s power in action!? (can we tell im enthusiastic about this coven yet?) It’s quite smart to have someone lure in prey. I wont lie, Heidi has quite the badass role in the coven. I wouldn't have thought about that I reckon. I’ve always thought that showed a kind of superiority. Oh you guys need to hunt your prey? pfft, ours literally comes to us. Her backstory really starts with Heidi being mistreated in her human life...a common theme Smeyer has. It can get old- i wont lie but when i give it some thought it kind of makes sense. Rosalie said it herself in eclipse, if any one of them had their happy ending, they’d be six feet under but i’d love a little bit more creativity. I could go on about how male vampires ended up being changed in comparison to female vampires but i’ll swiftly move on because that’s a whole other thing alone. Heidi was changed out of pity. (Which kinda infuriates me just to type, a pity change? Really? Really Hilda? we’ll see why it annoys me when i explain my take on Heidi.) Heidi was happy in her coven with Hilda, Victoria etc, which is hell yes. We love that. This is around the time she discovered her gift. Vampires were attracted to her and humans fell prey to her easily. Yup okay. I’ll take that. After a newborn vampire caused ‘too much attention’ Aro spared Heidi and Chelsea used her gift on Heidi. Nice, very nice aaaaand that’s where it stops and im left hanging. Personality time with Smeyer! Lets goooo. From what i remember and can find- she didn’t fucking have one. Apparently being pretty is enough for everyone. Which in hindsight, fair enough on a human Bella’s perspective, its literally Heidi’s gift to lure you in no matter what. She could tell you she’s a serial killer (and technically is lmao) and is about to sell your kidneys on the black market as to which you’ll be like ‘sign me the fuck up, want my liver too? Here, let me lie on the table for you. I’m down.’ without even realising what just happened. But even beyond that...Heidi has no personality traits mentioned. In New Moon she appears to be a little flirty which im all for, why the hell not? But...thats it? Thats all I get? Then we get into fanfictions, because i read them growing up. Heidi was depicted as flirtatious, promiscuous and then it varied between manipulative or she wasnt very smart. Which i’m knocking absolutely no one for. I think you can get a badass character who is incredibly dumb. I think all characters are actually valid whether they’re a genius or flat out dumb. I love them all. However it never really sat with me. I was never quite satisfied which i was fine with until i started writing for myself. That’s when i knew i’d have to really think about what my version of Heidi would be or i’d never be happy with my work. That and you also begin to fill in the blanks? The more you write the more you flesh out a character for yourself and so that rolls into my version of Heidi! So for my Heidi, she often gets the same trope of ‘she’s pretty and rich, those types of girls have easy lives who always had everything given to them.’ Then when it’s discovered she didn’t have a good human life. It turns to the next assumption of ‘oh she’s pretty and stupid enough to be used and manipulated’. In a lot of ways, that’s what Heidi wants everyone to think. Underestimate her, please, its all the easier to manipulate you if you do. She’s actually very smart and her rough human life made her more tough and intelligent. She’s very manipulative and yes she’s very flirty. You can look but you cant touch! She enjoys the attention her beauty gets her but if only these people would care more about what she’s like as a person. She’s not a barbie doll she will play you if she needs to. The only one who’s actually gotten far enough to sleep with Heidi is Demetri and even then the two don’t see each other romantically. They’re good friends who thinks the other is very attractive but that's where it ends. They’re basically friends with benefits some times lmao. However, Demetri got that far because he see’s the intellect Heidi actually has and acknowledges it. He thinks shes a queen who should be treated as such. She could take anything she wanted, a storm that people can only hope to survive in one piece. Secretly she enjoys a family setting. Whilst she never really wanted children (especially when she was expected to when human), she couldn't help but melt inside seeing little human children with their loving parents. She wants that for all children. Whether that's because she lacked such affection growing up, no one knows. She’s also a really good friend, you bet she’ll have your back. Crappy ex? Well we’ll show them, wont we (Y/N)? She’ll be a bitch and enjoy every second of it. She also loves the single life, believe it or not, you’ll have more difficulty getting Heidi to settle down than you would Demetri which speaks volumes. So yeah, move past her gift and really get to know her and you might have a very good friend. I also don’t see Heidi having a preference between male or females and that’s in all honesty. Times have changed and if she is attracted to another female then she wont be ashamed of it. She never has been (Demetri was the first to figure that out, Felix may be the last.) Even when the times weren’t approving of different sexualities, she didn't care. She will flirt with you and find it ridiculously cute if you get flustered.
Sulpicia: Sulpicia was an orphan which i used to develop my own version of her. Sulpicia grew to love Aro which im on the fence about but yup, i’ll take it. You’ll see what happens with my version in a bit lmao. and that’s where it stops. I get no personality again but do you know what we do in this fandom? We create one and fill in the blanks baby! So i write Sulpicia very materialistic and vain, she’s most snobbish of the wives and due to the other two, also considered the meaner one. She didnt have such things as a child being an orphan so when she got the opportunity to have it-she jumped. She isnt easily impressed and married Aro not for love but for immortality, money and status. (He’s only married you for your money, princess Jasmine! HE ONLY MARRIED YOU FOR YOUR MONEY! Damn it tik tok, but make it princess Aro) Which works well, because Aro doesnt necessarily love her either, he just wanted a mate so he wasnt the odd one out.He literally created her because he was like “Yup, you’ll do.” The two recognised they made a great team and image so they kinda grew to love each other? A little bit? Sure we’ll say its love...sorta. ANYWAY, It’s a highlight to Sulpicia being locked in that tower where she doesnt need to see Aro every little moment, it’s better than having a husband who she’d need to see everyday. ...Yeah my Sulpicia is something else lmao.
Athenodora: Athenodora is one of the oldest vampires in existence which kinda has me shook but I'll take it. She met Caius when he was fleeing from the Romanians, the two travelled together until they met Aro. Whilst on their nomadic travels they seemingly became mates. That's all we know about that. As to which the Volturi coven was made. Athenodora is completely loyal to Caius as well as highly dependent on him and I think that's very realistic given her circumstances. That's where their story ends...maybe for Smeyer but not for me! 😁 So I picture Caius and Athenodora being different sides of the same coin. Athenodora really mellows Caius, she is no where near is violent and sadistic as he is but due to her unwavering loyalty and dependency, she doesn't feel inclination to go against him...also because of Chelsea and Corin but I've said that so many times in this post I think we get the point. I think she's actually more gentle and soft spoken but that being said. She is very reserved and if she were to be angered she'd very much change. She could cut you down with words alone. Caius loves it. However beyond this is someone who is very maternal. Caius would appreciate it more if the two had children but instead it has created empathy. Caius doesn't want that when he can rip their head off. She struggles a little more with the 'no second chances' and that's another reason why Caius keeps her locked away and away from it. These two love each other more than words can describe. After being through so much with someone, the love can only grow. The two would happily risk their life for the other. Caius is saddened that he could never give her the family she wanted. He knows that to this day, Athenodora tries to reign in that side of her. He's a very supportive husband who's very different around his wife. He's much more tolerant, and angry. Simply more at ease. If anything happened to Athenodora, to put it simply...there would be hell to pay.
Didyme: Married to Marcus and Aro’s biological sister. Cute, me likely, keepy going. Her gift was happiness induction. VERY ADORABLE- Dont be as menacing as your brother...please. She was born several years after Aro and was changed by Aro ten and a half years after he was turned. (Dont tease me with all this lore Smeyer, I know what you’re gonna do) Aro was deeply disappointed her gift was just to make people happy- its okay Didyme, we love you. Aro is just...Aro. Her gift made many fall in love with her and its so freaking cute i CANT- but she only felt the same feelings for Marcus. MY HEART IS SO WARMMMM. Unfortunately they were so happy together that they lost interest in anything Volturi and were ready to leave. (Uh oh.) Aro, being the sneaky fellow he is, was like “I’m really happy for y’all of course you can leave. I love you my babies. My best friend and my sisterrrrrrr, I am the captain of this SHIP.” but was actually like “wait, no, no, no, not my Marcus. D-D-Did-Didyme I NEED him.” Think Sid the Sloth from ice age in the first movie when Sid really wants the baby. So this man is like...gonna have to do it to em and murder. He killed Didyme secretly (dunno how he pulled the secret part off- like i know how he did it but how did no one hear or see anything or even suspect anything IT WAS LITERAL FRIENDLY FIRE but we love the drama so continue.) Ironically enough she was very close with Aro and the two actually did love each other, Aro is just...murderous apparently, to the extent that even his sister isnt safe. And that’s it. That’s Didyme. Which im like...alright Smeyer i see you. I like this and expanded on this with my Didyme. i get the vibes that Didyme is the most innocent and kind of all the Volturi. Losing her meant losing the consciousness within the Volturi making them all the more ruthless because there was no one to say. “Guys, maybe lets rethink this? and quickly because i cant get Caius to put down the torch thats currently on fire.” Losing Didyme made Marcus mostly become passive and would rarely stop anything that happened. I often wonder if that provoked a lot of guilt for Marcus later on. (However thats a spoiler for something im currently writing...;) ) I also think of her as a major daydreamer and the most soft, gentle person anyone will ever meet. Like its difficult not to like her despite being in the Volturi, even the Romanians would have struggled if they met her. So in the long run...i hate nothing about Didyme, only find more and more love lmao.
Corin: So im going to be honest and tell you i have no idea what Corin would look like. I’ve got nothing and when i was younger i wasnt even sure if Corin was male or female. Like a lot of these names, i had never heard of the name ‘Corin’. I dont write for her as of yet because im still trying to figure her out. I think she’s quite quiet, she lets her gift do most of the work for her in keeping the wives, Chelsea and Caius when he doesnt get to go on a rampage, content. She was brought in also after Didyme died but Marcus refused her gift.That’s all i’ve got for her. Her gift is amazing, pretty underrated in my personal opinion since like Chelsea, she really helps keep the Volturi unified but other than that, I dont have much to say about her. :(
Afton: Another character i basically filled the blanks in for myself. So what we’re told is that he’s Chelsea’s mate and has the ability to disappear . Whilst thats a pretty cool trick...the volturi dont necessarily need it but they have to keep Chelsea happy and she demands that Afton stays so welcome to the family Afton! I also recently learned that if you hide behind Afton and he goes invisible infront of an opponent, you too will also be invisible. I figure that is until the opponent moves and basically changes their perspective but i could be wrong with that last part. That’s all we get so time for my unnecessary input! SO AFTON IS A TOTAL SWEETHEART. He’s very shy but polite. This is a complete opposite to his mate Chelsea. It’s actually what she liked about him. At first is was just be flirtatious to the shy vampire but when she actually got to know him... she fell hard. It was also Chelsea who had made the first move since Afton was so shy. Of course she’d never say so and Afton would never want to embarrass her so that was never really disclosed to anyone who wasn’t around at that time. She brings Afton out of his shell a lot and it wasn’t long before the two were mates. Chelsea is the light of his life. Hands down. He puts up with a lot for her and is happy to do so. She could ask anything of him and he’d do it and she doesn’t even need to use her gift. He buys are anything she wants almost instantly. He cant help but adore her passionate personality, like how hooked she can get on era’s such as the 1920′s, her love for jazz music and her ability to gush on and on about anything. The two had what the other lacked and that made them an excellent team. I love their relationship. I cant help it. However, as i said before Afton is very shy and tends to keep to himself. Sadly that, paired with Chelsea’s demand to keep him in the Volturi has left Afton a little bit outcasted. All the other permanent guards were wanted and considered important whilst Afton...not so much. Although that isn’t to say the other guards are mean to him or anything. They aren’t! (Except the twins who are...the twins.) Felix and Demetri tried to include him a lot but it was very difficult to break him out of his shell. That doesn’t mean to say they wont invite Afton when he’s around. Chelsea always appreciates their efforts. Afton is notably good friends with Santiago, who often preferred solitude as well.
(Guard to the left is who I imagine Afton is)
Chelsea: So supposedly Chelsea’s original name is Charmion? When i was younger i didnt really care much about her. I only really knew her gift and that she was the reason Afton was kept in the Volturi, since they were mates. From what im aware Chelsea basically wasnt in the movies/not identified. There wasnt much said about her in the books either. So since then i’ve kind of developed my own persona of Chelsea that could be completely inaccurate to canon but canon was my foundations with characters like these. She was always a red head in my eyes with ringlets, a copper kind of red head. I also pictured her to be small. However the newest addition to her character would have to be the mid-Atlantic accent. I blame Poppy Hill for this one. That character screamed Chelsea to me. She was very close to how i imagine Chelsea to be. So now Chelsea has an accent that i have no clue how she managed to maintain being in Italy so long and being born in Greece. LMAO. We’ll say she was very attached to that time. However, I think the time she joined the Volturi was actually very good for the story. She first came around just after Marcus had lost Didyme and Aro had her use her ability to keep Marcus in the coven. it’s really cool how she could really make or break the coven. Although, Aro was smart enough to not fully rely on her, using Corin’s ability on Chelsea to make sure she’d be happy and stay within the Volturi. Thats where the information on Chelsea really ends Over the years Chelsea has appeared in my writing and so beyond this point, Chelsea’s character is only my depiction. I figure Chelsea is a talker, like she can talk her way in and out of situations with ease. She enjoys being manipulated and even more so, being needed.Much like her gift, she gets under people’s skin- not in terms that she’s annoying but more so she can figure out people very well. Her mate is the complete opposite and so she often speaks on the behalf of them. Chelsea is very social and charismatic. She along with Heidi are the only two Volturi members who will be out and interacting with humans if necessary. Heidi for her ability but Chelsea purely for her social skills. She’s also the most interested in human culture. She loves the parties- the 1920′s being her favourite era in terms of fashion. She has no issue changing her name and has done so multiple times when the names run out of fashion.It’s like playing dress up! I’d actually love to write more about her. I’ve really grown to love her character, even if i filled in some blanks for myself. I think she and Afton’s relationship is one of the best, up there with Carlisle and Esme- despite the two being very different. It’s a part of their dynamic!
(I always imagined Chelsea to be a red head but Poppy Hill from THOHH is a very close depiction to Chelsea in my eyes)
Renata: A stressed little bean that lives on stress. I remember thinking when i was younger she was the big threat since she was Aro’s shield but now that im older i see...a stressed little five foot bean. I have no idea what she looks like but always imagine her dark hair tied in a tight bun, looking almost painful. Another who wears heels, like Heidi but she is very rigid just as she has been described. Her uncle is a bit of an ass considering he begged her to go with the Volturi so there wouldn’t be a threat. Dude, can you not just...hand over your niece? At least hesitate! Just like that, thanks to Chelsea, she’d give her life to protect Aro and...I have nothing else. Yes it does drive me mad that there are two named guards i know next to nothing about.
Santiago:So what’s known about Santiago is that he doesn’t actually have an ability. He’s just very good at battle techniques and fighting which is why he’s kept around. If they need fighters, they’re top three are Felix, Demetri and Santiago...in that order. Santiago is also much faster than a regular vampire (as shown in breaking dawn part 2- he caught up to Jacob and Renesmee quite fast despite the two having a running start and wolves supposedly being very fast- much like a vampire) That’s all we know of him so then i got in there and this is how I write Santiago. I gave him the background of coming from a superstitious family. Like he would be told tales of demons and witches growing up as well as things like voodoo. He knew an awful lot of urban legends and whilst he stopped believing in the bad luck his family taught him, he still held interest and couldn’t help the instinct of unease when witnessing such things as rituals. It’s ironic really. However Santiago always deems that humans have it all wrong. These forces are beyond human understanding and shouldn’t be played with. In that way, perhaps Santiago still has some belief in things such as superstition. He’s very secretive about it and would never clarify it for you. Santiago keeps to himself and can be quite standoffish. He can also be blunt even if it’s insulting- he doesn’t tend to care. Although he and Afton became quite good friends since the Afton was an outcast and Santiago didn’t enjoy large groups, or most people in general.
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Reylo and my meta/predictions
So i was watching almost every video i could find on youtube and read almost every meta i could find online regarding reylo, kylo/ben or rey since i joined this fandom.
So first of all this fandom rocks.
And now i make my own meta and predictions for the last episode. While i don’t like to to adore myself with borrowed plumes i like to thank all of the people inspiring me on tumblr and youtube.
So first of all what is SW about? its about family, love, hope, friendship dozed with a little action. SW is not a pure action movie. SW is not a pure drama and its neither a pure comedy. So what to expect when a movie is about family, love, hope and friendship paired with some war and action? Well, there will be loads of love in it. i am not even sure if the so called Antis just refuse to accept that or if they are indeed not able to see it. but enough of them and lets start with my results of the investigation. I call it investigation because the last month really felt like it haha.
So what do i think happens in ep 9?
Definately Relyo. I have absolutely no doubt it will happen which was different when i came here because i was afraid of another jonerys tragedy (no i am not comparing GOT with SW but a ship is a ship and it broke my heart)
I am convinced that the force brought these two together and we all know that the force is strong. Why did the force do it in the first place? Because its out of balance and the chosen one which was assumed to be Anakin failed. Why did Anakin fail? It was his possesive love for Padme and a few other reasons i am not going to mention here though. Love made him weak. We could now argue love makes kylo/ben weak too but its the opossite. And why do i think that? First of all Ben is not Kylo. Ben is Ben he just chose to give himself a different name but deep down its still the same person. Its like in real life when people try to be someone else because the pain is too much to cope with. With Ben though its much more complex which deserves its own meta.
So who makes love stronger and not weaker? Ben Solo.
Who is Ben Solo? First of all he IS the last male skywalker. Thats a fact which has also been confirmed multiple times. No idea why people still questioning that. He is a troubled young men who is strong with the force and falls in love with Rey. Sounds familiar? Look around happens all the time in real life too. And we learned that SW is about Love. People who watched and i mean who really watched all the previous movies will agree with me on that. I mean Anakin and Padme? Han and Leia? Lukes love for his father? Obi Wans love for Anakin? I could go on and on and on...
Coming back to the force and why it brought Rey and Ben together. When the force chose Anakin it failed. why? Because the force did not know that it needs two. The Ying and yang if you will. This is simple physics actually. Put one on a scale and it gets out of balance. Why Ben? Because he has this Skywalker blood which seems to have a certain importance in the Galaxy. Why Rey? Oh i can already hear people screaming because she is a skywalker, too. NOPE. She is not. Why isn’t she? Does it make sense to have two Skywalkers bringing back the balance to the force? NOPEbecause Luke and Darth Vader/Anakin couldnt either. They both failed. but they did not fail REDEMPTION!
Yes, there will be redemption. There has to. You cannot have an inbalanced person bringing balance back to the force. How will he be redeemed? First of all its Ben who needs redemption not Kylo. There is no Kylo. He needs to truly want it. but what will initiate it? LOVE. Love from his family and Rey. I do not really know how this will happen but i expect that Luke and Anakin will play a role in it too. The Skywalker saga would not come to an end if not all of them ending it. so i really really hope we will see them in whatever way possible. Maybe in the world between worlds, who knows.
Who is Rey?
I truly have no idea but what makes the most sense from my perspective is she was created by the force in some way. Ben did not lie to her when he said they were filthy junk traders selling her but i highly doubt they were her real parents. i also think that someone bought her and was trying to hide her for her own protection. From what? from the dark side of course. She would have made a good new apprentice. Who was the person who brought her there? i have no idea. I dont think it was Luke or Han, they would have remembered and since both are dead i would have expected it to be mentioned. Maybe it isnt important enough and we will never learn the truth or it will be a big surprise and it was leia or someone else we do not expect it to be.
I dont think she will ever go dark and i also believe that dark rey is either a vision or it wont even make it to the film. Rey can have dark moments here and there but not to a large extend. She is light, she believes in people, she fights for love and she fights for what is right. that is also the reason why i do not believe she is palpatines granddaughter. There was no indication so far so that would be a total gamechanger and i doubt we have enough time for that plot. What i do believe though is he knows about her and is trying to win her for his side. The novel indicates she heard a voice saying „kill him“ but she refused. I could be wrong though and this is exaclty what happens. i wont like it i am totally honest here but i trust J.J.to make it make sense.
Palpatine alias Darth Sidious. He is pure evil. The latest poster and trailer indicates he is coming back.
but how? I dont think he will be an incarnation or himself but spiritual. His mind is alive but not his body. So what does he want? What he always wanted evil power. He thought Anakin will bring him all this power but we all know how that ended. He sees another chance, another skywalker and another person strong with the force. If he could win the both of them he will gain even more power than expected. I have no idea how this will all playout but i could imagine he promises both something they are longing for. How can he be deveated? With Ben and Rey.
Yes, Ben and Rey will team up.
first of all because they have to. Sencond of all because its their fate and third of all because they love each other. How? He needs redemption first and the rest happens naturally.
I believe his redemption arc will start at the end or middle of the second quarter. Or maybe even later in the movie. In the beginning of the film he will remain dark and he will fight against rey. Not because he truly wants to kill her. He loves her he would never do such thing but because they will fight on opposite sides. I also believe they both try to avoid the force bonding/galaxy skype. They might have dreams or visions or i dont know but they will try to avoid it. Which makes them DESPERATE!Because that is not what the force wants and neither is it really what they want cause they are CONNECTEDand that is why their relationship is VERY VERY COMPLICATED. What would be awesome is if Leia senses it somehow and rey and herself have a great chat about it. i would loooove that. I really hope that happens. She has to tell her that she wants someone to wear her mothers dresses. Gosh if that happens i will die in my seat.
So when will we see a kiss? Or their commitment to each other? When do they finally say it?
i really struggle with this one but i think it wont be so obvious and it wont happen in the last 5 mins either. I was thinking about the „i’ll come back to you i promise sweetheart“ quote a lot recently. I am convinced that Ben will say those words to Rey. I think he will do something dangerous and she will be upset. They wont kiss when he says it but i could imagine he will touch her face while he says those words. It will be breathtaking. and that is the moment when i say „i told you so and so did my 9 year old kid (i dont have one but a child can figure Reylo out). I dont even know if there will be a kiss. I would prefer it but if they make it Pride and Prejedice 2005 like its fine. As long as it is 10000000% clear where this leads to. I also think there will be a child or more. But i also think we will not see them. It will be mentioned i guess. Or it will be a vision. Could be anything. But there will be future Solos/Skywalkers. The reason is simple. Disney did not buy LF to end the Skywalker saga for once and for all. They have to leave this door open to have a chance to make new movies related to it. i am fine with that as long as it wont have anything to do with D&D.
So why do i believe reylo is a thing, canon, endgame and one of the best love stories in years (at least for me)
Because it makes sense and its obvious. Its obvious since the TFA. Why? That!
and that!
„it is you“... yes, she is from your visions/dreams Ben
yes rey, its the voice which sounds so familiar and yes thats your prince right there.
and dont get me started with TLJ
yeah we all know what you guys wanted to do in that elevator
this is pure.. so pure
this is not the end for the two of them...
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And now a bit of Endgame ranting cause I saw a post on it. And to just call bullshit on the time travel thing at the end.
Granted, just to clarify: I dont take that much issue Steve going back for Peggy, in terms of character and story. AKA: yes, I ship Stucky, but this post isnt about that relationship. Do I think it wouldve worked better to give Steve closure in terms of moving on and finding a new family? Yes. Do I think it wouldve been really nice to have Steve and Bucky and Sam and the Avengers being that family in the present? Kinda yeah. But did I kinda expect them to go this route anyway? Also yes, based on Steve's vision from AoU.
If they hadnt just had old Steve at the end cause that RUINS EVERYTHING.
IIRC this was later explained as being essentially a full, closed loop, where Steve always went back in time and lived with Peggy and was always Peggy's mysterious husband that the fandom has always wondered about. And that this works because an alternate timeline is only created when an Infinity Stone is moved through time, as explained by the Ancient One. (Which is already just so damn specific like why would you know this one thing?? But I guess there's magic so I cant argue there all that much)
But this still DOES NOT MAKE SENSE.
Just on the writing side, this really feels like a desperate attempt to cover a plot hole. Because the explanation is "oh, well it's a time loop because we never said it couldn't be a time loop". And while that's fine for fanfiction, fanfiction isnt a multi billion dollar grossing film. Like, yes that explanation isnt wrong, but it's so messy, because there was never any precedent set up for it to ever be a time loop. They did such a great job explaining how travelling back in time would cause timelines to diverge, that I, at least, understood that to be the type of time travel they were playing with. And it works! But the lack of explanation of time loops in the movie makes it hold up terribly if you're SOLELY watching the movie. I mean, you shouldn't need to watch interviews to understand the movie. Basically, its sloppy, so I reject the possibility.
Also, it just messes with canon? I doubt I need to explain the whole "Steve is too much of a dumb golden retriever to be able to live in the past and not change shit". At the very least, no doubt he'd save Bucky from Hydra. Nuff said.
But mostly, it messes with Peggy, especially with the Agent Carter show. For one, that scene at the end of season 1 which was written for her to let go of Steve and move on? That suddenly means nothing - the same problem as with Steve - except for some reason this pisses me off more? Like, how DARE you mess with Peggy Carter's character arc, you monster. Also, it makes the timeline strange? Because if this is supposed to be read as a full loop in which Steve was always her husband (which I assume they're justifying with the fact we never got confirmation as to who her husband was) then that means he didnt show up until after the events of the TV show. Season 1 starts in '46 and season 2 starts a year later. And if season 2 also spanned a year, he didnt show up until 1948, at least? Which just...why?? Steve has no reason to go back to a time 3 years after the end of the war. (Frankly, I'm of the opinion he wouldve gone back far enough to help in the war...and maybe taken Rhodeys advice and pretended he jumped out of the plane, idk. But still, gone back to the same year, at least, as when he was originally presumed dead.) But even if he was smart enough to wait until after 1945 so as to not mess with the timeline that much...why 1948? Why wait that long, or longer, when his entire reasoning was because he wanted to get that life with Peggy? Just...what??
Also! That line from the recording in Winter Soldier. The only reference we've ever had as to who Peggy's husband was. About Steve saving a battalion in 1945, and her husband being from that battalion. I personally remember this line being tossed around a lot because it was the reasoning that Daniel couldn't be her husband because he was discharged before then. But it should also mean Steve isnt her husband because then he saved...himself? Yeah, maybe time travel incident and he poofed himself into that battalion on accident so past him did actually save future him. But 1) that's fucking convoluted. And 2) again, why wouldn't he be in Agent Carter? Which means this is just apparently a complete lie, and the only evidence we thought we had is actually nothing at all. Or the logic behind that statement is like "Steve also saved himself by saving the battalion because they got through the Hydra blockade safely" but...I'm sorry, that's dumb, and I cant imagine Peggy talking around a point like that. (And no, she wouldnt be talking circles like that to conceal the fact Steve is her husband cause you know what would be easier? Not making that reference at all.)
Plus the fact this was clearly never their plan? Fairly certain the Agent Carter writers said at some point that the show would answer that particular mystery (all the more reason it should've gone longer) and I highly doubt this wouldve been said answer. Also just the existence of the Steve and Sharon ship in canon because uh, gross. (Although again, this wouldve been fine if they hadnt just put old Steve in at the end because then Steve wouldve gone back and made a divergent timeline. Meaning that Sharon in the original timeline wouldn't have...known Steve when she was a kid? So at least theres that?)
(Personal opinion is that the original plan was to have Steve die in Endgame because of that scene from AoU and the implication seeming to be that he gets back to Peggy somehow. Not necessarily dying instead of Tony or anything, but just that he wouldve died. Or at the very least, they weren't planning to have old Steve show up because of problems)
Rant over.
#from the mind of niennavalier#endgame#avengers endgame#rants#feel free to ignore but tonight was apparently a rant night#but i do just wanna put it out there#i still ship Peggy and Daniel#and the image of baby Tony adoring Aunt Peggy and Uncle Daniel is possibly the best thing ever#(i neeeeed that art holy shit)#granted in canon i wouldve been fine with them being close friends cause i know my ship contradicts the catws line#(but so does canon itself)#also just question but uhhh who are sharons parents?#i legit looked up family trees while writing this post cause it lists Peggy as her great aunt#(and forgive me if this is dumb but any family relation naming convention goes over my head)#but anyway yeah peggy is listed as her great aunt and that means that one of sharons grandparents was one of peggys siblings#and her brother michael is in the show#except hes also listed as her great uncle?#and so im like...do they have another sibling or something??#and it cant be the sibling of either peggys husband or michaels wife cause then the name wouldnt be carter except by some weird coincidence?#(and it definitely cant be from steves side if we are looking at the time loop cause steve doesnt have siblings?)#(also uh...even more gross if that WAS the relation)#so like what is this#(and i guess just disclaimer i actually didnt see allnof agent carter season 2 but wikipedia has dates...2016 wasnt a fun year)#steve rogers#peggy carter
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do you think they’ll come back to the whole “how’d you do it” convo with bellamy and clarke and he’ll find out about how she radioed him everyday? or do you think that was that cus it felt like a good place for her to tell him but she was also like yeet when an emotional aspect to the conversation came up
Well this is the question isn’t it?? I think everyone in the Bellarke fandom is probably asking themselves this right now.
So, I’ve been team “I don’t think they’re going to address the 2199 calls” since the beginning of the season. That’s for a couple of reasons: 1) I’m trying to lower my own expectations lol but mostly 2) Clarke does NOT say Bellamy’s name in 5x01, Eden. She says his name in the call at the end of 4x13, but the writers do not have Clarke SAY BELLAMY’s NAME in 5x01. Now, it’s extremely clear from context that he’s who she’s talking to (”I’m proud of you” + “this would be so much easier if I knew you were alive” + calling her other friends by name).
So it’s not that I don’t think we’re meant to think Clarke was talking to Bellamy the whole time; it’s that after an 11 month hiatus, if “Clarke radioing Bellamy” was about to become a Big Romantic Catalyst for bellarke, I would expect the writers to really flag it in 5x01 by having Clarke say his name, thus kind of putting a pin in that for the general audience. So, going in to 505, I was very pessimistic about the chances of Clarke’s The Notebook calls to Bellamy ever being relevant again.
BUT THEN
When I was watching this scene, when Bellamy asked, “how did you do it?” I literally froze because - are they really going to go there??? are they really going to have her TELL him that she spoke to him every day?? that the memory of him, his love, his partnership, was what got her through?? Because honestly, between the pause and Eliza’s acting, and the awkward way the scene ended - with the conversation LITERALLY UNFINISHED - that’s how it FEELS. It feels like she was about to tell him that he helped keep her alive, but then she chickened out at the last minute.
Like, idk what the stage directions were, but Eliza’s acting here makes Clarke’s hesitation in response to this question very clear. And if the answer is only and always just “Madi,” what awkwardness is there to be had??? In any sort of just world, this “omission” on Clarke’s part is a set up for her to reveal, down the road, probably when her and Bellamy are embroiled in some sort of angsty conflict, that it was in fact HIM that helped her survive 6 years without a peer on the ground.
Now, I’m also not going to pretend that this show always does what is just lol. They drop threads all the time, and as Bellarke has been building for seasons now, there are several scenes that were seemingly set-ups for later reveals that were pretty much forgotten (2x09 “Love is weakness”/”I was being weak” and 4x06 “Clarke, if we don’t see each other again-” come to mind). However, there are a couple of reasons that I feel like s5 might be the season where these kinds of ~romantic bellarke~ threads actually come home to roost.
One of the reasons I think that is something that a lot of fandom, included myself, has picked up on, which is the relatively muted nature of Bellamy’s reaction to finding out Clarke is alive. Like, the cast and writers have told us until they’re blue in the face that Bellamy is less “heart” than he used to be, less fiery, but there’s a difference between finding balance and like, not having a visible/visceral/conflicted emotional reaction to finding out that, contrary to what you believed, you weren’t responsible for killing your best friend/partner/woman you’re lowkey in love with by proxy.
Like Bellamy is clearly happy to have Clarke back, but he hasn’t verbalized really ANYTHING about how it feels to have this huge bomb dropped on him after he lived his life for six years in honor of her. After he mourned her and missed her and memorialized her and moved on from her. This omission of a nuanced reaction on Bellamy’s part makes me think either 1) the writers really fucked up and don’t care bout Bellamy/bellarke or 2) They’re saving big relationship-defining angst feelings about the Separation and Reunion for midseason Bellarke angst. Needless to say I’m hoping it’s door #2.
What does that have to do with the truncated fireside chat scene? Well, in my deepest darkest Bellarke wet dream fantasies, they have some blow up fights or angsty as shit moments later this season where all of these omissions and half truths and old wounds get put on the table, subsequently setting fire to the tentative automatic partnership bellarke have fallen back into. Something else that makes me hope we’re in for some knock-down, drag-out emotionally raw air-clearing angst is, of course, the last shot of 505.
So I don’t know if the show is really going to go full love triangle, and honestly I don’t much care, because THIS SHOT is intentional. Arguably, the shot of Clarke’s reaction to becho kissing is the first objectively nonplatonic framing of bellarke in the show. This shot tells me the show is ready to acknowledge in some way that Bellamy and Clarke’s feelings for each other go beyond platonic partnership. And to me, THAT means the door is open for all their baggage to come home to roost later this season. Because we as a fandom know that if the writers ever had Clarke and Bellamy really fully put all their feelings on the table, there would be no backpedaling into platonic territory. But if they’re willing to frame shots like the one above, I think they might finally be ready to stop just dropping hints and actually follow their own trail of bread crumbs to some MAJOR developments on the bellarke front.
Which brings me back around (finally) to your questions: will Clarke ever tell Bellamy that she called him every day for six years? The short answer is i don’t know!! If we do indeed get some relationship-changing moments between Bellarke, I would say it is highly possible, even likely, because this fact would be such an emotional bombshell for them - for Clarke, because she would essentially be admitting out loud that she loves Bellamy, and for Bellamy because he wouldn’t be able to escape the implications of Clarke staying so intimately connected to him for 6 years while he thought she was DEAD.
And THAT’S why I think Clarke hesitated. Because Clarke had six years to come to terms with the fact that she loves Bellamy, a fact that she was able to work out for herself by “confiding” in him every day. But when Bellamy comes back down, she realizes that she was in love with the Bellamy that LEFT, the Bellamy that has remained static, a ghost at the other end of her radio for six years. But this Bellamy is solid and real and DIFFERENT and, as she finds out at the end of 505, this new Bellamy is someone else’s. This Bellamy has moved on from her in a way that she never did from him.
So while I’m betting Clarke at the end of 505 was glad she hadn’t spilled the beans about Bellamy being her personal diary for 6 years earlier in the ep, I think it is a Definite Possibility that this fact comes back up at the MOST inconvenient (read: most CONVENIENT, for me) time so that Bellarke can really lean into that fucking angst like I know they want to. *Clarke voice* I still have hope. Here’s to the possibility of emotionally fraught Fights and Reconciliations and Realizations, anon.
#ask mj#accidental meta again i guess#have some s5 bellarke thoughts#bellarke#bellarke meta#my meta#s5 spec#i guess#i just REALLY wanna believe the awkwardness/truncated nature of that scene Meant Something#im probably 100 percent wrong but whatevs
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