#i know it's kinda dumb to post this on my tmg blog but i know there are a lot of trans people following me

[jennying-my-thebes]

trying to send out the opposite of what i'm feeling inside right now.

i hope you guys are doing okay. i hope you're safe. i hope we can survive this. i hope i can survive this. i hope we can find things to prevent us from becoming statistics. i hope we can hold onto trans joy with everything we've got. i hope my life doesn't have to end before i get to inhabit my own body without this ever-present knot of dread and self-loathing and hopeless dysphoria in my gut. i hope i don't lose the little shreds of hope i still cling to. i hope there is still something to live for and to get me out of bed tomorrow morning and every morning after.

i spend every day thinking of the last lyrics of hebrews 11:40, my favorite song these days, which i have posted endless times on this account. it feels like a fantasy now, but it's all i've got.

" take to the hills, run away

i'm going to get my perfect body back someday

if not by faith, then by the sword

i'm going to be restored "