#i know i've spoken abt it before but this is the first experience i've ever had of disliking a book that everyone else on here raves about

[popsicle-stick]

gonna have to drag myself back to reading babel at some point because i spent twenty god given pounds on it!!! in a cost of living crisis! i will make myself like this book if it kills me

[mrs-nate-humphrey]

This is totally cool, lol! That's why I tagged you, I like different perspectives 🥰 and I adore lesbian Jenny

I've been thinking a lot about Jenny's character and sexuality lately since I'm in the middle of rewatching the show. I totally agree that she's attracted to women and most times she pursues guys it's mainly to increase social status and not because of genuine interest. Nate always felt different to me, though. Like, the two times she really pursues him is in season 2, when she's being homeschooled and trying to make it as a designer, and the end of season 3, which is after the whole Damien drama and she's just looking for someone who cares about her and respects her (I know you said once that it doesn't even feel romantic here, which I also agree with, poor girl just needs a connection). I do really see how it can be interrupted as comphet, though. Like she feels like she's supposed to be attracted to Nate because who wouldn't be?

I think the reason why I lean the other way is probably just projection. Jenny's been my favourite GG character since I first watched the show when I was 12, partly because I relate a lot to her, and since I'm bisexual... Add that plus the fact that I totally have had a crush on Nate and of course I'm gonna ship them. I've been relating to Jenny even more this time around cause I dropped out of school this year, so her season 2 arc really hit close to me. So this made my jenate feelings come back tenfold and also made me that much madder at Rufus, lol. I just wanted to go through the screen and shake his shoulders like "There are other paths than the one you want your daughter to have, not everyone has to go through life like society expects you to let your daughter carve out her own unconventional path you fucking idiot!" Luckily my parents have been way more supportive.

Mainly I just see Jenny as bi with a strong lean towards women, but I like to think about lesbian Jenny, too. It wouldn't exactly be the first time I had contradicting headcanons.

I don't know I just think it's really cool that different people can have such different interpretations of the same character. I think that's what's so interesting about fiction, to see how we view things differently depending on how we view and relate to things based on our own experiences. Tumblr can be so focused on hating people who disagree with you, but I like following people with different opinions, it helps me understand people better.

Yeah, I'm glad you tagged me!! back in November, some anons were mean to me about shipping Jenate (me??? who literally does not even - anyway) and ever since then I've been trying extra to ensure that Jenate shippers feel welcome on my blog - you may already know this, because I've brought it up before, but I'm saying it here to let you know that every time you tag me in your Jenate edits I get so happy that you're sharing something you're so passionate about with me!! I'm also a big believer of like........ making the content you want to see (a big part of why I even learnt to gif is because nobody was giffing Dan & Nate, and I was like...... that's the content I need, so if it's not already existing, I'm gonna make it happen!) so regardless of my feelings it's always so cool to see the way you conceptualise JN + their feelings re: each other, and your choice of scenes + lyrics (??? I'm not actually familiar with where you got the words for your edits, they're likely songs I haven't heard, haha) is just so interesting & good!

OH my full Jenny & Nate feelings are a lot more complicated than just comphet on Jenny's part. I feel like..... neither of them was romantically/sexually into each other? and that is kind of the appeal to me? I've always interpreted Nate's interest in Jenny during the s2 arc as sort of like - everything in his life is so unstable and undetermined, and here is Jenny who is so clear on who she is and what she wants, and he admires and respects that, and he wants to be there for her and support her, so when she kisses him he just sort of lets her take their dynamic wherever she wants to? that is very much the vibe I got. You already know how I feel about lesbian Jenny, I mean, you quoted my meta right back at me :'))

but I DO agree with you that Nate is different from the other guys to Jenny. JN have this really specific kind of honesty to them - well, when Jenny wasn't spiralling and trying to get power and acting out, and when the writers actually cared? I still think that NJ had the potential to be a SOLID dynamic but the writers made it sorta unhealthy on the show :(( - but I've spoken abt moments like in seventeen candles and the empire strikes jack before, where they're both able to be emotionally vulnerable around each other in ways we don't see them be with anyone else. I've even compared that to what I like about Derena, whom everyone knows I ship in every possible way, haha. But there's something about characters who trust each other and allow themselves to be honest with each other in ways that they wouldn't otherwise EVER be - especially with characters like Jenny & Nate who have spent so long trying to seem fine and okay even when they're really not.

I honestly really like the idea of queerplatonic Jenate - they're life partners, they're each other's rock, they're each other's person - but it's not romantic OR sexual - and for Nate & Jenny, whose adolescence has involved navigating other people sexualising them so much + not having the best track record with romantic relationships - for them, I feel being qpps gets REALLY interesting, because you get all the perks of a relationship without the romantic/sexual obligations? (obligations isn't the best word, but i don't know what else to use here? LOL) and that's something i love to explore.

I feel like book Jenny was bi! The way she gushed about Nate, whom she canonically had a crush on, and the way she gushed about Serena were EXACTLY the same. Also YES I love multiple headcanons always, it's a lot of fun seeing people explore that!!! I know people who have aroace readings of Jenny, or aro lesbian / ace lesbian readings of her, and I find that really cool, too!

I also definitely get you about relating to Jenny a lot, and feeling that kind of connection. It's similar to how I feel about Dan, and .... explains a lot of my contradicting dair views, actually. A few years ago I had a seriously intense crush on a girl who was... a lot like Blair, in many ways. I spent a ridiculous amount of time writing poetry about her, etc etc, but I never actually acted on it. If she'd fabricated schemes that involved us kissing, though..... I don't know. I don't think I would've denied it if I'd felt like I actually had a chance. I think we just had a case of bad timing, & I like to think in another universe, maybe we were actually together for a bit. I'm glad that your parents are supportive of you and better than Rufus! <3

I think that's what's so interesting about fiction, to see how we view things differently depending on how we view and relate to things based on our own experiences <- THIS exactly! this is a big part of why that "proship" is in my bio. like this is exactly what it means to me and how I conceptualise & understand it!!! Like you, I also like engaging with people who have different understandings and opinions of the characters -> it definitely helps you make new friends you would otherwise not meet by staying in your bubble, & from a fandom point of view, it also helps you develop a more nuanced understanding of a character. Some of the best written Jenny Humphrey I've read was in Jenate fics - and I've had people who don't even ship Blenny tell me they liked the way I wrote Jenny in my post canon blennyfic, so... idk. it's loving Jenny hours - each and every single iteration of Jenny!!!

[datastate]

pls talk more about lurien and aster (?)

i love them both and i love how you characterise them !

aaa i'm very happy you like the both of them!!! i enjoy writing their dynamic! :D

i would love to talk more abt them though it is a little difficult w/o direction sometimes ehe. if you have anything in particular feel free to let me know!! :] in the meantime! here are some misc. thoughts i've had lately between these two:

- lurien's never really been one to be openly affectionate. it's not that he's averse to it, in fact he'll often welcome it, it's just that he typically feels it's just... not something that he should initiate.

-> something similar goes for any of his possible romantic endeavors; this habit, alongside the fact there was a long period of time he wasn't in a state to hold (several, stable) close relationships, ended up with him only ever left admiring someone from 'afar' - often never able to break past superficial endearment to find some deeper connection, whether that's friendship or a romantic relationship.

-> eventually, he essentially bars any chance of committing to a romantic relationship once he becomes 'watcher'. he is gay, but never images he'll be able to cultivate something like this, especially now due to his position within the city. he finds his peace with it. it helps that it isn't often on his mind anyhow

- i'll shut up abt romance after this point, but it makes a fun contrast for aster. where aster's been the sort to throw themself out there for their relationships to figure out who they are and how they'll fit in this world and what they want, lurien's much more reserved and, while certainly not sheltered, inexperienced in some social fields that aster traverses much more easily.

-> from this, it's surprising that they're of the few friends lurien's had to ask directly whether or not it was alright to physically reassure them - who hadn't held him first. aster's made it clear prior that they find comfort in it, and they often give it out to other friends of theirs! but never once asked that of him. it's sort of like a give and take here, where they don't want to step out of line and assume too much of their friendship, and he doesn't wish to impose anything upon them. (and though they accepted that first time, there was some lasting fear there that he unintentional placed pressure within the phrasing of his offer; thankfully, they were more comfortable afterward with allowing the two of them smaller affections)

- anyway, speaking of aster coming to terms with who they are, i feel it's very important to have them be (mostly) certain of themself prior to joining lurien's service. while there is still room for them to grow, it's just. key, to me, to have them have experience outside of lurien's influence so there isn't any underlying possible manipulation going on. if they're sure of themself and their worth, then they aren't gonna let someone treat them like shit, watcher or no.

-> alongside the above, it's weird if lurien's the one insisting they keep titles of master/servant if he wishes to have a close relationship + there should be something financially aster can fall back on. while not their favored option, it shouldn't be entirely sour. if you want lurien and aster to be close, there has to be certainty that aster has chosen this work (whether it's something they genuinely enjoy, or they chose to work in place of a friend, or it's to humble themself lmao). this removes a Lot of weird implications where lurien could like... hold that over their head, you know? not that he necessarily would, but regardless of intent, there would definitely be external pressure to abide and keep him content which just! ruins their friendship / any possible close and healthy relationship, in my eyes.

- anyway, moving on to a lighter note - where lurien loves painting (and architecture; iirc i've spoken here before on why he prefers scenery more than portraits so i won't rehash that), aster favors embroidery as their hobby. same goes with sewing. working with physical materials is just very soothing for them. it's in part why they choose their work, too. it helps keep them in the moment

-> these two have definitely made some things for each other / let the other watch them work on their art ;-; (in fact there's a wip i've got of them giving something to each other something for bug new year's bc. they. yeah <3 ... also i imagine aster isn't all that close to their family, so they've got either the option of staying with a friend over this time or staying by lurien and... esp years later on, they tend to favor time with him :] )

- i feel like. although lurien and hegemol were close, aster and hedge could never quite click with one another. it became especially difficult after lurien became a dreamer bc. well. you've got someone who was also close to the person you cared for years on end. all they're doing now is reminding you of the person you've lost. for both of them, they end up avoiding each other where possible. it's just how they've grown accustomed to coping when other people embody the issue. aster's dealt with it countless times in their past, and in this case they cannot move past that cowardice; hegemol did the same upon his suspicions toward thk, keeping it out of sight when possible for his peace of mind.

- this is quickly leading into heavy territory, but i feel like... lurien, himself, was already counting down the days to when his life would be put to an end for the dreamer plan. and that's in part why he concealed the purpose of his visits with other dreamers / the king from aster. when he ultimately revealed he was to 'be set to rest' by the end of the season for the infection to be put to an end, aster was... deeply hurt. while they understood why he did this, it didn't stop them from feeling like he didn't trust them. which was just... there was such little time for them to process that whirlwind of emotions before he essentially died, so they ended up emotionally closing off - this only served to strengthen lurien's argument and he was so certain he was in the right that he didn't recognize it was just the little time that caused them to shut down, and just. wow. it became very messy very quickly

-> don't get me wrong! most of the time these two find it fairly easy to communicate, but. when you're talking about premeditated death. well... it's a difficult subject. and lurien, as proven, is one reluctant to change. he didn't want things between aster to change, and withheld information for that reason. he knew it was selfish, but 'ignorance is bliss' and all. (and deceit isn't necessarily such a crime in his eyes; it reflects integrity yes, but ultimately it is one's actions which count their merit.)

i'm sure i've written some fics/made posts on all of these before but . yep! some thoughts. i apologize if it's a little spotty / hard to read :'D i have a lot of thoughts on them but idk what thoughts to try to summarize and i haven't even finished my full document on how i write their characters / what the character's comprised of and that's for my own reference ahvmgsd