#i know i'm worthy. i know.
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chaoticbooklesbian · 6 months ago
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According to the Doctor Who Listened To Me, switching from my birth control to this new treatment could result in weight loss, if, indeed, my steady weight gain over the last decade or so was due to the birth control. I'm having severely mixed feelings about this possibility.
On the one hand, if I did lose all the weight birth control (presumably) made me gain, it would be much easier to interact with the world. Buying (and making) clothes would be much easier. Buying furniture, too, and cheaper besides. I'd be able to ride roller coasters again, sit in whatever seat in a theater, sit in booths in restaurants. I wouldn't have to ask for seatbelt extenders on planes, or worry about unintentionally invading someone's space because of how much I take up just by existing.
On the other hand...I've seen what happens when people lose that kind of weight. I've seen how much better they're treated. I am so desperate to protect the younger me who lives in my head from having it proven that it was her body that was incorrect, not the people around her. I don't want little girl me to have to know, conclusively, that they were right, that she would have had it so much better if she just lost the weight. I don't want to see just how much more desirable I would've been this whole time if I'd just been half the size I am. I don't want to know how many crushes would have liked me back if I'd just been smaller. I don't want to know exactly how unworthy I am now, as I currently am. And I'm terrified, because I know that if the weight does come off, I'll find out whether I want to or not.
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housederiva · 5 months ago
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The first woman I ever fell in love with should at least have a tarot card if she's not going to be in Veilguard
here's bethany
Edit!!! I’ve never been more happy to be wrong
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butchjesus · 6 months ago
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ok but for real now. since tiktok has so throughly disappointed on this trend. who is your strangest hear me out / most bizarre crush? freaks and headscratchers only edition
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a-most-beloved-fool · 10 days ago
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One of the lines in TOS that drives me the most crazy is in The Man Trap, when Spock is in command of the Enterprise. A death on the landing party is reported, and Uhura, upset that Spock doesn't display an emotional reaction, challenges him and reminds him that the death could be Captain Kirk. "He's the closest thing you've got to a friend," she says.
And that always sticks out to me.
It paints Spock as a pretty tragic figure, doesn't it?
Like - and this is disregarding new canon, sorry Disco and SNW I'm ignoring you - Spock is kind of implied to be, well. Pretty much alone. Kirk, his brand new captain, at that point, is the closest thing he has to a friend. We know that Spock was on the Enterprise before Kirk's Captaincy, and we know he was at least somewhat close to Pike in that time, but by that point Pike is disabled enough to barely be able to communicate, and it doesn't seem like Spock was close to anyone else on Pike's enterprise - at least no one who stuck around.
He's estranged from his family. Maybe he kept contact with Amanda, but frankly I can't imagine they were calling often. He has an unwilling fiancee who he has no real relationship with. He never seems to (willingly) date, wh He knew Leila Kalomi at some point, but it's blatantly obvious both that they haven't kept in touch and that Kalomi's interest in him makes Spock fairly uncomfortable, so she doesn't count. Am I missing anybody?
And then Kirk comes, and takes over the Enterprise, and, from the very start, looks at Spock with kindness and affection. Wouldn't that be. fucking life-changing? Kirk comes and, in a matter of weeks, single-handedly changes the entire trajectory of Spock's life, simply by liking him. Y'know?
It's genuine, too. It's not like Kirk is just playing nice for the sake of the command team. He's just - fond of Spock. Really, properly fond of him.
And it's more than a bit overwhelming for him, especially because he likes Kirk just as much as Kirk likes him, and he hasn't experienced that before, either. It's wildly obvious how important Kirk becomes to him from his words and actions throughout the show; from "when I feel friendship for you, I feel ashamed," in The Naked Time; to believing in Kirk's innocence when all evidence was against him in Court Martial; to breaking through the blood fever to beg T'Pau to forbid Kirk's participation, and also his smile in Amok Time; to Spock jumping in the path of a poison flower in The Apple; and on and on. It's obvious to the viewer, and it's just as obvious to other characters in the show. Spock treasures Kirk and his friendship.
Idk. I'm just regularly blown away by how astoundingly impactful Kirk was on Spock. From the very moment they meet, they're both irrevocably changed. Two halves of a whole indeed! I can understand how it would frighten Spock enough to make him flee to Kolinahr, unused to the sheer emotion brought on by Kirk, and I can understand how it would be compelling enough to cause him to return.
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groovygrub · 3 months ago
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canisalbus · 10 months ago
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I really appriciate how often Machete is depicted struggling and feeling like a burden, while still being loved and supported by Vasco. It gives the top tier angst of "i'm not good enough, I'm not worth it" but you frame it in such a way where it's clear that's just how he *feels* and is not how things really are, but also it's so nice to see someone who struggles quite often in a loving and unique relationship that suits them. The narrative of not being able to love or be loved unless you're consistently healthy is really tiring lol.
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ruporas · 2 years ago
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only human
[ID: Two page comic in color of Vash and Wolfwood from Trigun Maximum. The first page has a black background and the upper half, behind the panels, is splattered with stylized red blood, scattered bullets, and lifeless hands. In the first panel, it focuses on Vash's boots, showing him stepping through the panel and into the bloody scene. The second panel shows his bloody footprints and the third panel shows his face, his down-turned eyes looking downwards. It's a neutral, vague expression with confliction. At the bottom of the page, the back of Wolfwood's head and shoulder is seen, blood dirtying the white color of his shirt and side of his face. Vash's hand reaches out to him from the right side of the page.
The second page shows the entire scene in full, half the page in light and the other in solid black. At the center, Vash leans down onto his knees as he wraps his arms around Wolfwood's shoulders into a hug. Wolfwood's back is turned away from the viewer, his left arm holds onto his bloodied punisher and his right hand sits on his lap. Light casts from the left side of the page, showing the bloodied surrounding, but the held up punisher casts a shadow on the both of them, shielding them from the light. END ID]
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romanticatheartt · 6 months ago
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You know why I love Feysand? One of the reasons is because there's a balance between them. In a way they complete each other.
Feyre is all forgiveness, love and a pleaser.
But Rhysand on the other hand is all revenge, hate and never forget.
Whenever he's drowning in hatred for himself, for people who wronged his loved ones, she's there to pull him up and shower him with love, respect and reminding him of goodness.
And whenever she is being too forgiving to the point she's forgetting herself or to put herself first, he's there to bring justice and be a shield for her from the injustice of it all.
That's why this is one of my favorite scene of them:
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He's saying he can't forgive anyone who wronged her. But she remembers the ones who wronged him and notices he doesn't care about himself, his hatred for himself won't allow it.
She's saying he has to forgive at some point. He's there to remind her that maybe it's okay to admit that some people have made her suffer.
It's this back and forth between them. It balances them.
He's always self sacrificing himself to keep his loved ones safe, to make them comfortable, to be a shield. And Feyre came to his life, saw right throw all of them and let him to burden her with some of those duties he put himself up for them.
Sometimes it's a wrong trait but it's never out of malice.
And she is always too forgiving, putting everyone else first, always backing down when some times she needs to back up for herself and she let herself to forget them. But he won't, he will remember, he'll defend her if it's needed and when someone crosses a line, he's there to remind them to back down.
Sometimes she let people take too much from her and it might hurt her in the process. A wrong trait of her.
They're the definition of "I will give my love for the both of us" and "I will give my hatred for the both of us"... does that make sense?
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bakudekublogblog · 7 months ago
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talking to normal people about mha is always so enlightening because someone told me they didn't like season six and i was like???? THE BIBLE??????? YOU DONT LIKE THE BIBLE??? BAKUGOU KATSUKI RISING?? THE APOLOGY??? THE CHASING AFTER HIM TO FIGHT SHIGARAKI, THE REVEAL KATSUKI HAS BEEN WORRIED ABOUT IZUKU, IZUKU'S FERAL RAGE WHEN KATSUKI IS STABBED, KATSUKI BEING THE ONE TO FIND IZUKU AND THEN THE ONE TO BRING HIM HOME??? YOU DONT ENJOY THE SACRED TEXTS?? and then i'm like oh right not everyone is a fujoshi high on that sweet, sweet bkdk yaoi
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simptasia · 2 months ago
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LOST: Season One
#lost#abc lost#lost one cap per ep#this was a project i was gonna do anyways but the timing worked out that i could post the first one on the 20th anniversary!#this is one cap per ep every season. from left to right. and this is important: its not a cap that sums up each ep#its a cap that REPRESENTS each ep. the way i choose them varies every episode#sometimes its an utterly iconic moment. sometimes it reps the theme of the ep. or it hits with a theme of the character themselves#sometimes the cap i use won't even involve the character whose centric episode it is. trust me. this makes sense#anyways i'll give a good example: for outlaws i was so tempted to use a shot of the judgemental soulful gaze of the boar#or perhaps sawyer in the rain after he shot that man#but! i used that shot of sawyer's dads legs as sawyer is hiding under the bed. i feel it worthy because this moment. this scene#is literally a core part of sawyer. it's a defining moment of his backstory. of his character. so yeah. makes sense yeah?#anyways some eps had Too Much going on (lord i could make one of these for exodus part 1 alone) and some not enough#or well they DID but like lacked in caps that Hit in the way im thinking. thank heavens charlie shot ethan cuz i was worried about that ep#i was like ''aw shit what am i gonna use'' and then an iconic lost moment happened kjhfdsjkhfd#anyways. there are 25 eps in season one. so im really glad that the last ep contains one of the moment iconic visuals/moments in all of los#oh i should add that these caps are unedited. i did not fuck with the colours or saturation in any way#i found 'em and i pieced them together. this is harder than it sounds. i browsed through all the screencaps of every ep of season one#and i will do so the remaining five seasons#some of these were super easy like i knew what cap i'd be using before i even started (eg. do no harm. the moth. in translation)#but some took some real Thinking. and some eps even had several caps that would have worked. this has all been quite interesting#also yeah. y'all already know damn well what cap i'm using for the very last episode
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solarisfortuneia · 1 year ago
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here's a silly something that was going to be a thing of its own but i thought it was much better as a blurb <3
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“kaeya,” you call, running your fingers over a midnight blue t-shirt with a cat and the word ‘meowlicious’ embroidered on it in silver. “come take a look at this!” 
hearing no response, you turn, only to find kaeya’s hoodie-clad figure next to the hat section, where a wide variety of them sit on display. the trolley sits to the side, abandoned in favor of a ridiculously colored hat that now sits on his head.
“what?” he asks, a twinkle in his eye. “you don’t think i look handsome like this?” he poses like a model on the runway. with his midnight-colored hoodie, white sneakers, silver earrings, eyepatch and rainbow beach hat, he makes for a comedic sight.
the price tag dangles over his eyes, the cherry atop this absurd cake. a smile spreads across your face and laughter bubbles up in your chest.
“you look very handsome,” you tease. “i’d definitely pay—” you reach for the tag and flip it over. “five ninety nine for you.”
“is that all i’m worth?” one hand flies to the center of his chest in feigned astonishment. he catches your wrist with the other when you begin to move away. “i was under the impression that i’m worth far more than a meagre five ninety nine.” 
“oh, you are.” you flick his forehead playfully. “but the standard rule of department stores is that i pay what’s on the tag.” you stick your tongue out at him, intertwining your fingers with his. 
“touché. it looks like you’ve struck a bargain. take me home, then, my love.” 
“we’ve got to pay for our stuff first, my love.”
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tacticalfiend · 1 month ago
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played Mouthwashing and loved it, don't think I have anything that insightful to say about it though. I will say, however, that the fan reaction to it is incredibly disappointing to me. Like do whatever you want I'm not your dad, but I find it a little contemptable that a game clearly about sexual assault and gendered violence is being completely eclipsed by fucking yaoi posting. There's so much to discuss and explore about Jimmy and Curly (and Anya!), but I guess that's just too boring when you can hallucinate toxic yaoi!!! (BUZZWORD!! BUZZWORD!!). It's kind of incredible how Jimmy seems to just.. forget or brush aside the violence he's inflicted upon Anya in favor of obsessing over Curly, and a majority of fans seem to be eager to do the same!
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theblockedtomb · 6 months ago
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if you make posts about, e.g., trans men being seen as the worst of both men and women, denied the right to speak on either experience, and tag it as transandrophobia or something similar, you are making it very clear that when trans women talk about their experiences you either do not listen or do not care. Trans women also experience these things. It's not because you're a trans man. It's because you're trans. I know you're trans because you're a man but that's not the point, the point is all trans people are treated like this. Unless they either go stealth or gain high levels of social acceptance. Guess which subgroup of trans people that's easier for.
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welcometogrouchland · 8 months ago
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your talia in your newest comic is very pretty 💜 shiny hair save me….
AHH THANK YOU SM I didn't shade her hair originally when I was coloring cause I was trying to streamline things but it looked so incomplete without it...I can't help it if she has L'Oreal model energy. Anyway you're always really nice on my Steph posts so here's some misc Stephs I had lying around as thanks for this ask (feat one of those alt cowl designs i posted back when!)
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disposal-blueeee · 7 months ago
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actors au ! lol
brusk told me about this au recently . we were talking about their actors for chapter 20/21 and she gave me the idea of drawing the two of them + todd interacting together . this is pretty enough to paint it , even ( but i won't )
brusk's post about this au is right here . i remember she said that the original idea was by sysig , though !
scriabin by zarla-s
todd and edgar by jhonen vasquez ,
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sillyfudgemonkeys · 3 months ago
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Do y'all think when Rangi was running around the estate, she had a literal rainbow flying behind her nyancat style? And that's how everyone could tell she was gay?
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