#i know everyone shares this sentiment but

[olenoidedserratuspilled]

This is a lovely thread you have going on here, so I'll go ahead and do that thing when I butt in and shit all over it with my trademark doomerisms. If that's not something you wanna read, ignore the post from this point forward.

I'll preface this response by saying I'm AMAB. Do I identify as a man? I don't know and I don't care to know. I don't genuinely believe any of what I'm about to say, I'm only playing devil's advocate.

TERFy fearmongering about trans women being fundamentally dangerous derives from exactly the same toxic, fucked-up view of male sexuality - and of male existence - espoused by Evangelism: that all men are biologically predisposed to predation, violence and other sexual evils, such that they can't ever really be trusted.

While this is true, it misses the root both sentiments share: humans, regardess of gender, have an innate capacity for violence and harm. Said violence and harm often takes on the form of sexual predation when it comes from men. For much of history institutions enabled that human predisposition in men rather than attempting to combat it. You already know this, of curse.

Why's this relevant? Because you can never tell who has or lacks the predisposition for that kind of violence. It's the poisoned M&M allegory, the old game of hawks and doves. The hawks will always fight you for food while the doves will always share it, but you can't tell the hawks from the doves. Safest bet is to assume all others are hawks.

Violence directed against women by men is a widespread problem! But it doesn't follow that a majority of men are bad by default

Says who? "Many men are dangerous so most men are potentially dangerous" may not be objectively true, but it's a logical reaction to observable fact, and many people hold that view their whole lives without any issue. If there's no incentive, internal or external, to change a belief, why change it? "Because it's wrong" doesn't count as an incentive.

Many have been trained to entitlement and bad behaviour by patriarchal systems and misogynist ways of thinking, which are both things we have the power to change.

Why should we? It's not our job to educate/change them. If they don't want to change themselves, what reason is there to not just go "Fuck 'em"? The majority of female separatists I've seen, for example, understand that first half perfectly well and still arrive at my conclusion. I know I don't agree with them, but my bias on the matter should be obvious.

Attemping to affect this change and bring about equality is the core conceit of feminism, and we can see, very demonstrably, that it works.

Says who? Many feminists ont his very website disagree with it being the core conceit of feminism, or a conceit of it at all. Many posit that it doesn't work, and all indicators of it working are fabrications, outliars or insufficient. Maybe they're factually wrong, but if their message has the wider reach and greater staying power, do the facts even matter? I don't really think the do.

You're not only saying that the long-term goal of feminism is impossible

Oh it's very much possible. What you do is that you just punish all men collectively. Be it through isolation, termination or whichever other method you prefer. I think it'd be morally abhorent to do that, but if there's enough demand for it, what's it matter what I think?

For what it's worth, this isn't me saying everyone with "Kill All Men" on their bio actually means it. I don't think they do, but it'd be ideologically consistent if they did. That's the point I'm trying to get at here: the goal is to end the patriarchy. If you get the job done, who cares how you did it? Doesn't matter the color of the cat, as long as it catches mice, and it definitely doesn't matter what the mice think about it.

you're functionally agreeing with every disgusting, sexist rape-apologist who brushes off assault and misogyny as "boys will be boys" and "men are just like that."

Easy solution. Can't agree with them if they're all dead. Or isolated off in their own separate society. Whichever you find more palatable.

Their misdeeds aren't synonymous with their masculinity, but are rather choices they specifically have made.

Says who? If you decide that masculinity is defined by those choices, then yes they're synonymous with masculinity. Words can mean anything you want them to, if you an get enough people to agree with you. Is that fair? It is if you define "Fair" to include it.

rather than representing some default state of cruelty to which all men naturally revert, misogyny is instead taught

All this means is that misogyny can't spread if there are no men to learn it. Sounds like an easy fix. I know what you're saying! "That's not biologically possible! How will we reproduce?". There are a few answers:

A) It's not biologically possible yet. We just have to make it so.

B) The "good ones" can stay, under our conditions.

C) Who says we need to reproduce?

I find all of them morally repugnant, but then again, who asked me?

The teaching itself, while offering contextual authority to men, can also be harmful to them.

And why should you give a shit? They brought it upon themselves, it's their fault to begin with, they'd never show you the same sympathy you show them. If they hate it so much they can always just choose the rope. All of those are horrific things to say, sure, but who cares as long as the crowd agrees with them?

So why am I saying all of this, exactly? Because I think you're talking at a brick wall. I think the time to talk about this came and went a long time ago, and trying to do it now is only gonna get you grief. You can't reverse entropy. You're on fucking Tumblr, for crying out loud. People here just see the word "men" and start typing up Anon hate.

But sure, keep punching the tip of that knife the rest of your life. Have fun.

I cannot express how jarring it was after being raised by a "Porn Addiction Coach" to get into a relationship with a woman and come face to face with the fact that she did actually want me to sexually desire her.

Like, in Evangelical Purity Culture, male desire was basically poison. It was a threat. It was this constant temptation that would destroy everything. And even after leaving, in the sort of queer, feminist spaces i spend most of my time in that wasn't something that pretty much anyone was spending time actively dissuading me from feeling.

But my desire is good. It's not something that I'm being accepted in spite of. It's a positive thing. It's a bonus. Not even just vanilla stuff, all the stuff I'd convinced myself were these weird terrible desires that were shameful to have.

It honestly took me over a decade to fully accept that. To stop dissociating during sex and confront that I was, in fact, being a massive perv and that was fantastic and preferable and that I could accept that into my self-image without shame or self hatred.

But it's important to do. It's important to leave relationships that don't welcome that part of you. To know that your sexuality is valuable and valid and worth owning and celebrating. Because the alternative is just...not being. Either existing as yourself and repressing the part of your identity that is sexual or allowing that sexuality to exist but turning off your self while it does.

[briyourmotherdown]

today is a special day, a happy day, a smiley day, if you will.

⋆ happy fucking birthday, james hetfield ⋆

sure, this is a cheesy post but it’s a special man’s birthday so >:)

[hinamie]

in spite of everything, I had fun <3

[mercymaker]

re: gatekeeping

i've seen this argument come up again and again across multiple blogs and i feel like it's doing such a disservice to the creative community of this fandom and is worth speaking about (especially considering that some people expressed their reluctance to create in response to the recent events)

and i just wanted to say that YES. no one owns specific scenes. YES. people are allowed to gif the same characters. hell, as far as i've seen this community is incredibly creative and generous, sharing their mods and reshade presets and scenic locations.

to me PERSONALLY, the line is crossed when there's no transparency. when it's a repeated behavior. when there's no respect or regard to your fellow creators or their wishes.

i want to be very clear that this was all brought up in regards to a VERY specific case. a very nuanced case with a lot of context and i don't think it should be used to view the community as a whole.

outside of it and on the bigger scale, this community is full of incredibly skilled and creative individuals. helpful individuals. ones that WANT to inspire and encourage others to create. that share and help and give tips. that support each other. that put a new, exciting spin on 'the same old' game with its limited scenes.

and while, surely, everyone is entitled to their own opinion, i feel like there have been some really thick brushstrokes applied when talking about the bg3 fandom creatives as a whole. and it just doesn't sit right with me.

[rivalmelty]

they are fukuzawa’s boys, adopted twins, and menaces to the yokohama police

(pls do not tag as beast)

[oleanderspride]

“You need to be respectful towards people who aren’t comfortable sharing their F/Os, they have boundaries that need to be respected just as much as anyone else’s” and “While it’s completely fine to keep your distance from people who share your F/Os, you shouldn’t be putting them down just because they’re fine with sharing and you aren’t” are sentiments than CAN, and moreover SHOULD coexist

[aunteat]

feeling sappy this morning and just wanna say that i really appreciate yall 💖

[lemongogo]

[sainz100]

idk how to explain it, but I feel this small bubble of hope. as if some good news is right around the corner 🫧🌅 not yet, but maybe soon, I'll always feel that hope that the next chapter will be better than the last

[good-beans]

I love my online names and stuff but what if I want everyone ever to call me my real name ;-;

[risingsunresistance]

twitter is entering their "rts > likes" phase now that likes are private after they spent years calling us ungrateful for being demotivated by ratios lmao

[breathe-2am]

My mom secretly filmed my panic attack yesterday and then tried to get my therapist to violate confidentiality by meeting w her privately to discuss my treatment (obv my therapist contacted me bc this is not the first time shes done this). I dont have the energy to even b mad at her abt it bc its like not even worth it, she screamed at me for leaving the house to pay bills yesterday. This morning i bought her pastries and instead of saying thank you she gets mad abt money. Girl ok. Dont eat the fucking pastries then. Just trying to b nice. Whateverrrrrrr.

[noisytenant]

sorry, i think this might come across mean, but it is simply how i feel.

almost always i genuinely enjoy writing alt text and im glad im in the habit of doing it. but also, the idea of having someone else describe my images instead of me is so viscerally repulsive. I wonder if we could use this to get more people to write alt text. if you dont wanna write alt text then someone else decides how your post looks to people using screen readers (or people with slow internet). shudder !

and i want to be clear. the people who add image descriptions are incredibly kind and doing a great service often for little to no recognition or appreciation. And a lot of them are good at it. But it isnt about the quality of the description--they could be the best damn writer in the world, they could knock my piddly description into smithereens--if someone else ever became the voice to describe my art, or my face in a memey selfie, or literally anything i posted for public viewing, i would explode. i was born a control freak and i will die a control freak. ONLY I DECIDE MY NARRATIVE ‼‼‼

[toonbly]

honestly i have a really have a hard time looking at my old vrai stuff. but going through old stuff for grtv fills me with absolute delight, its been so long but i still hold so much love for this story and the people who followed it

[rodismancave]

. wanting 2 write stuff for bad ending rodimus but it scares me soooo bad

[bbeelzemon]

i was thinking about a stupid star wars drinking game i just made up ('take a shot every time someone falls down a hole or shaft in a star wars movie') and i jokingly but lovingly compared the star wars movies to those cheap and colorful 'oil in water' hourglass toys in that 'i know theyre objectively not very complicated nor even particularly Good, BUT that i do still sometimes enjoy looking at a new one, or even pulling out an old one i used to enjoy to watch it again'. and for some reason my brain frankensteined those two sentiments (drinking game + hourglass toy) back together in a different and worse way and came up with "drinking game where you take a shot every time one of the water drops fall down the hourglass" (authors note: if you've never seen one of those in motion before, they drip down very uniformly and fast, like ants marching in a line) which THEN very quickly shifted laterally into "drinking game where you take a shot every time an ant goes into the anthill" and that just really filled me with some kind of 'he is mesmerized by the beauty of the world' emotion for a moment which from there i blacked out and the phrase "drinking games for angels are like 'take a shot every time someone on earth makes some meaningful interaction or beautiful connection in their insignificant yet profound lives'" manifested in my head and ANYWAY to me this whole thing feels like i just experienced a whole hero's journey plot inside my mind but within the span of like, 20 seconds