#i know everyone hates to tag me in stuff for one muse because i will offer u the others too. there's nothing we can do abt that

[poetfilm]

handwriting meme.

choose a font from here which closest resembles your character's handwriting and write their name.

alice harmon. i have thought very deeply about how she writes. i think it might actually be a bit messier and far less legible, so this is just what it looks like with effort. but it would always be swooshy with elongated capital letters.

tagged by: @sopineun, thank youuuuuu!

tagging: um anyone who hasn't already done this. idk who has done this yet. but let's go with @eueclid (for conor uwu), @strangewonderful (for andiebug), @entriprises (for spock), @holyrots (for marco + a little bonus if you want to assign whatever emojis xeno would use to sign stuff), @b1uedcollar (for cody).

some bonus ones under the cut .... because i do think about this way more than i need to.

jack rabbit. yeah i actually do think he writes like this. there's no real explanation for that.

noley i mean mr movie star himself. he did practice this for many years.

lozzie i mean lizzie i mean lizard. probably spent some time with noah when they were kids just practicing their fancy signatures. hers is also way messier than this.

nepo boyfriend i mean roswell. this one is not officially a "font" but something my best friend wrote because he has good penmanship and we had a vision.

honourable mentions:

i think ellie's writing is completely unreadable to the human eye. the only person who knows how to read it is jamie, but he struggles too.

jamie writes like a 12 year old boy because i think that's the age he stopped putting effort in.

iris might not even have a signature. i'm sure they know how to write and would if they cared to, but they don't. fabian writes everything for them.

janey has a normal-ish signature that gets progressively more threatening and less readable as time goes by.

jodie adds little stars to everything they write. sometimes it's more prominent than the actual words.

[captainthisshipinmyhead]

Secret Desires

Sanemi x Fem!Reader, Giyuu x Fem!Reader (p sure I used she/her pronouns at one point but I don't think I use any descriptors really, so it could be read as GN!Reader, just wanted to tag as fem just in case)

Shinazugawa hates Tomioka, everyone knows this. But nobody knows the real reason behind this animosity-- or that it mostly has to do with you.

Warnings: angst, mentions of sex (no smut), OOC Sanemi tbh, cold/emotionless Giyuu (I put that as a warning bc it pains me. Giyuu is my lil cinnamon bun sweetie I hate making him that way 😔), very little plot outside the romance stuff lol.

WC: 5,182

A/N: I'm not rlly a huge fan of like, music-based fics but I have to admit I thought about the idea for this one when a Panic! At the Disco song came on shuffle the other day. These lines listed below in particular from "She Had the World" inspired this. Enjoy. As always, constructive criticism is much appreciated but please be kind.

“When I look in her eyes, well I just see the sky”

“I don’t love you, I’m just passing the time”

         It was no secret to any of the hashira that Shinazugawa hated Tomioka with a passion. To the few of them that had asked about this animosity outright Shinazugawa had given some lame answers before, like that Tomioka appeared to think of himself as better than the other hashira (true), that Tomioka had defeated him in all their 1v1 training sessions due to some really bullshit happenings that occurred each time and it was annoying (true), and that Tomioka had killed one of Shinazugawa’s pet beetles (not true). Though these were the reasons he gave for having such a hatred for the Water Pillar, they weren’t the real reason why Shinazugawa couldn’t stand the guy. The real reason that he would probably never reveal out loud to anyone else was simple: you.

         You were indeed the reason for the one-sided hatred between the two hashira. You didn’t know this, of course, but Shinazugawa absolutely couldn’t stand the fact that Tomioka had you. Though he never intended on telling you this, Shinazugawa had feelings for you. Deep, deep feelings that he actively had to push down when you talked to him with your bright smile, telling him another one of your stories about the crazy happenings of your day. He was no stranger to envy and not getting things that he wanted in life, so it wasn’t just the fact that Tomioka had you, but that he didn’t care for you as he should.

This was another secret Sanemi held closely-- not because he didn’t want to tell you, but because didn’t know how. He had found out Tomioka’s true feelings because Tomioka had gotten careless after one stressful week with back to back missions and left his personal notebook out in a common dining space. The only person around at the time to find it was Shinazugawa. He normally wouldn’t care about the personal musings of a random person but given whose notebook it was, he couldn’t resist reading a few tidbits. His jaw fell open in rage when he saw the way Tomioka had written about you there—not necessarily as if he didn’t care for you at all, but he was very clear in the fact that he had no romantic feelings toward you whatsoever. He was very clear in his musings that you were his partner simply as a way for Tomioka to relieve stress, seek out affection, and boost his own ego.

When Shinezugawa read this, he was beyond pissed. He was absolutely outraged. How could he? How was it that Tomioka of all people got to have someone as kind as you and he didn’t value you the way that he should? He could’ve killed Tomioka with his bare hands in that moment, but he knew that you were at his estate now, visiting your partner for the evening, and he knew that you hated unnecessary violence and animosity between fellow demon slayers. In the moment, he decided to place the notebook back where he had found it, and go on a walk to calm his anger. He would deal with Tomioka in due time, some way that wouldn’t have you angry at the both of them.

         In the weeks following this discovery, Sanemi could not shake the rage that filled him at the sight of Tomioka. And don’t get him started on how it felt seeing the both of you together. When you approached Sanemi alone, which you often did as you enjoyed talking to the typically prickly Wind Pillar, he forced his emotions down so that he didn’t burst forth with the knowledge he had on your little boyfriend. You absolutely deserved to know, but if he were to be the one to tell you he wanted to do it without anger, only with empathy and understanding. The way that you should be treated. Sanemi valued you deeply, and he never wanted to hurt you. It was his own deep-rooted care for you that made this situation so anguishing. He knew that he could treat you better—so much better. If only he had gotten closer to you first, then maybe....

         He tried not to linger on the maybes. He didn’t want to be your friend with any conditions attached—he never thought of himself as the most emotionally intelligent person, but he at least knew that wasn’t fair. So he let it play out, because although Sanemi didn’t necessarily believe in karma, he did believe that the truth always comes to light.

         As far as your relationship went, you were comfortable in it. While there were things that maybe had you desiring more, you couldn’t say that you weren’t content with Tomioka so that was good enough for you. Really, what more could you ask for? Your boyfriend was strong, handsome, perceptive to your needs, and your intimacy together was consistent. Sure, Tomioka wasn’t the most outspoken about your relationship or on board with PDA—or, when you thought about it, any kind of physical affection-- but you really didn’t have any complaints. I mean, is your relationship really in the trenches if your boyfriend doesn’t show you off? No, that wasn’t necessarily a deal breaker.

         But when you saw other couples together, you felt an ache in your chest. You couldn’t help but compare your relationship to the sugary sweet ones around you. You saw others who held hands on public pathways, fingers intertwined, and imagined what it must feel like to be in love so freely where everyone could see. You saw the way these couples would sneak pecks on each others’ cheeks or foreheads, and the way that they would blush at the acts of affection, and you sighed internally. You heard whispered vows of devotion and love, and couldn’t help but think about how Tomioka never professed his love to you. Not verbally at least. I mean, he had to love you of course, you two had been together for the better part of a year. He just didn’t show it that often. He was just subtle. That’s what you told yourself. You had muttered the three words to him before, but you usually only did it in moments of passion, when you could play it off as being really into the moment if he questioned it. He didn’t, but all you got in response to your proclamations were grunts in your ear or hums that you hoped were agreement. But honestly, not hearing those words from him hurt your feelings. You wanted a deep love; one that your mind never questioned because it was always made so clear to you how much you were valued. You wanted it so badly you dreamed of it, but you weren’t willing to end things with Tomioka just over feeling a little pathetic at not publicly being affectionate with him or hearing three words. Other than those desires of yours, you guys were perfectly fine, really.

         It only took about a month before the guilt and rage began chipping away at Sanemi’s resolve. He had to tell someone, even if it couldn’t be you—and Iguro was the only hashira Sanemi trusted with any tidbits of his personal life, so Iguro it was.

         He had invited the Serpent Hashira over for a training session one afternoon when he was particularly frustrated. Iguro pretty much knew the drill; when Shinazugawa invited him over for one-on-one training it usually meant he needed to rant about something and let off some steam. Since Iguro was more of the quiet type anyway, he didn’t mind keeping quiet and letting Shinazugawa grunt out his frustrations.

Sanemi may have thought that he was keeping his admiration for you a secret, but Iguro was much more perceptive than the Wind Pillar realized. When he finished telling his friend how shitty your relationship really was, he was shocked that his friend called him out instead of getting angry with him.

         “And you didn’t tell her this?” Iguro admonished Sanemi, “You’d keep such a secret from the girl you love?”

         “I...what? Love? I didn’t say anything-“ He cut himself off at the sharp look in Iguro’s eyes as he tried to deny his feelings.

“I can’t tell her, obviously! She would be angry not only at the situation but at me, for knowing now for a month that her relationship is a sham! You can’t just....just drop that on someone! I mean, did I even ask  for your opinion anyway? Geez!”

Iguro’s eyes peered sternly at Shinazugawa over his bandages. “You should have told her as soon as you knew. It wouldn’t have been easy, but it would have been easier than telling her now. Maybe she wouldn’t have been angry then, but she definitely will be now that you’ve known all this time, and you can’t blame her.” Iguro would never admit it, but he had grown fond of you over your time with the Demon Corps, and it was mostly contributed to how highly Shinazugawa, his friend, spoke of you. This whole situation now pissed him off as well.

         Sanemi found that he couldn’t meet his friend’s eyes.

“You think I don’t know that?! Know it all ass....” Sanemi mumbled, deflecting the shame he felt at being called out. “Look, whatever, I’ll tell her soon. I said already I should’ve told her before. God, this sucks.”

Iguro nodded in the affirmative, sheathed his sword and bid goodbye to his friend before heading back to his own estate, trusting that their training session had been helpful. And it turned out that it had been helpful, as it struck Sanemi to be called out so plainly by his typically cold friend, who he had not expected to scold him at their training earlier. I mean, what was that about? Iguro never spoke up when Sanemi ranted—it was like, an unspoken understanding of theirs. But hey, whatever. The longer Shinazugawa got to ponder on the oddity of the earlier conversation, the less he thought about what he was on his way to do.

Sanemi approached the residence of the Flame Pillar, who you were training under as his tsuguko. His steps faltered a bit as he saw that you were already outside and you spotted him quickly, giving him no more time to prepare his words. He forced a smile on his face that he hoped matched yours, and closed the distance between you.

“Y/n! Hey, how are you doing today?” He started out with some niceties, stalling.

“Oh well, I’m pretty good, Sanemi, how about you? I see you’re kind of flushed, if you need to come inside we can. It’s pretty hot out today. Here, let me get you some water as well!” As kind as always, you took him gently by the elbow and began walking him to the engawa nearby. As he was seated, he rubbed his sweaty palms on his pants. Gratefully accepting the water you held out to him, he drank deeply and sighed, knowing that the painful conversation had to begin.

“Y/n, I um... I came here to tell you something. I should’ve told you a long time ago, but I have been a coward, and I’m sorry for that.” He glanced sideways at your face, noticing already how the worry filled your eyes.

“About a month ago, I found some personal writings of Tomioka’s, and, well, they... they mentioned you, and...” He paused to take a deep breath, preparing to rip the metaphorical bandaid off. “He wrote in his notebook that he isn’t in love you”

Sanemi held his breath. It almost seemed in that moment as if the world held its breath too—he could feel a slight breeze but didn’t hear it move through the trees, and even birds that had been chirping had fallen silent. He forced himself to look at you and he immediately wished he hadn’t. Your mouth had fallen open in a delicate “o” shape, and your eyes sparkled with tears that had yet to fall. It appeared that you were trembling, and you couldn’t meet his eyes as they desperately tried to lock onto yours.

After a few moments of prolonged silence, Shinazugawa reached his hand out toward you, not knowing what to say but knowing he could offer you some physical comfort—and you jerked violently away from him.

“Go.” Your voice was low.

“Y- Y/n I’m—”

“I said go Shinazugawa,” you were practically growling at him.

“But wait, I-“

Your head whipped around so quickly he was startled, your expression as fierce as when you faced down a demon. “You knew. You knew for a month and you hid it from me. I thought we were friends, I- I thought that you cared for me!” The anger in your voice is exactly as he had feared.

He was going to lose you because of Tomioka—no, no.... he was going to lose you because of his own stupidity.

Not wanting to anger you further, he slipped down from the engawa and took a couple of steps away before speaking one last sentiment to you: “I am sorry, Y/n. I understand if you don’t wish to talk to me anymore, but my door is open to you if you ever change your mind.” He exited the estate and walked with a heavy heart back to his own mansion.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

         You were devastated. Your deep fear had been confirmed by your friend, who had known long before you and chosen to deceive you. You had ignored Giyuu’s letters asking to meet for meals, and you had asked Rengoku to turn him away whenever he showed up at the estate’s entrance. You sobbed for a couple of days straight, then you could only lie in silence for the next day or two. Rengoku, the kind hearted man that he is, brought you all your favorite foods at mealtimes to try to entice you to eat, but your appetite was nonexistent despite his efforts. You finally reached a point where your sadness turned again to anger, but this time it was rightfully aimed toward the person who had deceived you longer than anyone—Giyuu. You finally instructed Rengoku to let him in after 5 days straight of the Water Hashira groveling outside. Rengoku, bless him, glared at Tomioka the entire time he marched to your door, though he knew not what was going on between the two of you.

         You had made an effort to clean your appearance up; you didn’t want to be disheveled in front of the man who had ripped your heart to shreds. Tomioka began the conversation, immediately starting to apologize, knowing how you had found out because Shinazugawa and Iguro had already ripped him a new one for it.

“Y/n please, I’m so so sorry. I can’t apologize enough for-“

“How could you?” You cut him off, not wanting to hear his bullshit apologies. If he were really sorry or guilty or whatever he would claim to you, why would he have kept his act up so long? Why pretend to care for you at all? If he wanted sex, it could have just been that. People make arrangements for situations to just enjoy sex all the time, there could have been some sort of understanding between you without the need for this senselessly cruel pain that you were put through.

“Y/n, I... I messed up. I was selfish, and I began a relationship with you knowing that a serious relationship wasn’t what I wanted, and I just.... I just hoped that somewhere along the line I would change my mind. I need you to understand though that it has nothing to do with you, you’re the best person I know, I just... I’m not someone who’s able to date right now. I don’t know if I’ll be able to ever, it’s just how I am. I should have told you that. I made excuse after excuse not to break things off. I enjoyed your affection and your attention, and I took advantage of it. I’m sorry.”

You listened to his small speech with a quivering lip.  He dated you for almost a year, with you thinking that you two were serious about each other, just because he liked your affection? You were almost more angry now that you’d heard his stupid explanation; it didn’t excuse this sham of a relationship. The silence stretched on as your tear-filled eyes glanced at the ground, at the trees behind him, at the birds in the sky....anywhere but at him, the man you thought you loved. Eventually, he broke the silence.

“You’re right to be angry. I would be too, anyone would be. You deserve better than me wasting your time. I’m so sorry. I know I never told you I loved you, because that felt like a lie, and I know you probably feel used. But y/n, if you ever forgive me, I know I could love you as my friend. I could be a much better friend to you than I ever was a lover. Please, take all the time you need. Even if you don’t forgive me, I’ll be willing to talk more whenever you’re ready.”

         He slowly began to turn around and step toward the estate’s main gate, and you watched him walk with slumped shoulders. At least you knew he truly felt bad about it all—Giyuu was not an actor. He couldn’t lie to save his life—not directly, like how he never said that he loved you. Once you were confident that he was out of earshot, you let out a sob that you hadn’t wanted him to hear, and turned to escape back into your bed for the remainder of the day.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

         After a week of your grieving your future with Giyuu, in which luckily you had not been called on any missions, you finally felt okay enough to get ready and go to a group training session. Upon your arrival, you were approached by Sanemi, whose expression was more worried than you’d ever seen it.

“I came to check on you,” he said, eyes flicking between your own as if searching for a response there. You knew he had come to ask about you multiple times, maybe more times than Giyuu even, but Rengoku took his role as your protector seriously and turned Shinazugawa away even when he threatened violence.

“I wasn’t taking visitors.”

“Okay, yeah, I um—I get that. You needed time. Did you at least get my letters?”

You hadn’t realized he had been sending you letters also—you had instructed your crow not to deliver any messages to you unless they were from the master instructing you to go on a mission. Everything else could wait.

“Oh, my crow may have them stored away for me somewhere, but I didn’t want to read any letters last week either. Sorry.”

“Oh no, no, no need to be sorry,” He rushed to reassure you, placing his strong hand on your shoulder in a comforting gesture. You hadn’t realized how much you missed his company; how he effortlessly showed you his sweet side that others didn’t see. Your heart, having felt frozen solid for well over a week at this point, began to thaw out at the genuine warmth you felt from your friend. Overwhelmed with appreciation for him, you drew him into a hug, which he returned after a beat of hesitation.

         The training session went without a hitch as you slid right back into your regimen. Sanemi hardly left your side, and other slayers gave the two of you odd looks at the beginning when you had embraced. You couldn’t blame them—Sanemi was feared by many for his quick temper and how he resorted to violence in many situations that weren’t quickly and easily resolved with words. Though you’d never had to be fearful of him, you were able to see why others were.

         As you were gathering your things to head back to Rengoku’s estate, Sanemi asked if he could accompany you, which you accepted. You enjoyed his companionship too much to say no.

“Y/n, I want to apologize to you. I know you were upset with me for not telling you about Tomioka when I found out, and I should have. We’re... we’re friends, and I care about your feelings. I didn’t tell you because I was scared to hurt you, even though it wasn’t technically me who was doing the uh, hurtful thing? Look, I’m not good with words, so uh, I—” His cheeks blushed scarlet as you peered up at him in the evening sun. A tiny smile formed on your face before you cut him off.

“It’s okay, Sanemi. I know. And I know you probably wanted to tell me. I’m not angry with you really, you told me eventually. You’re a good friend to me. Thank you.”

         You looped your arm through his and continued walking, a comfortable silence between you.

Sanemi was the one to break it. “You deserve better, y/n. I always thought you did, but definitely with all this coming out you deserve better. You deserve someone to love you. I see other couples around, like, kissing and holding hands and stuff and... I don’t know, I just never saw him do any of that for you. The next person should do that and more. You should have someone who isn’t afraid to love you proudly. I know you have a lot of love to give, ‘cause that’s just who you are. You are love. So that’s what you deserve.”

You couldn’t say anything in response—you had never had someone tell you something so heartwrenchingly sweet before. You were coming up to your place, so you stepped on the engawa and turned to face Sanemi before dipping down to place a kiss on his cheek. His blush from before, barely having faded, returned with a vengeance.

“Thank you, Sanemi,” you said, voice barely more than a whisper. You hoped you conveyed how much you appreciated him. You smiled, and backed into your home, watching his lips turn up as he also backed toward the path leading to his home.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

         Over the following months, you got back into your normal routine and felt much more at peace with your heartbreak. You had the support of the rest of the hashira, even if most of them didn’t know details of what happened between you and Tomioka—it wasn’t something that you were inclined to share. Not only would it cause more animosity to be directed toward him (he wasn’t the most popular slayer to begin with...), but it also caused you a bit of embarrassment that you were toyed with for so long. Regardless, you came to understand Tomioka’s reasoning for stringing you along, especially because of his lack of social life outside of you. You felt bad for him, knowing that now he truly had no one to spend time with; but you definitely weren’t ready to be on friendly terms with him anytime soon so you didn’t make efforts to see or speak with him.

         You had grown closer to Sanemi than you were before, which was a feat considering that you were already best friends really, even when you were with Tomioka. You both ate all of your meals together, trained together, often walked each other home, and confided in one another more than ever. Shinazugawa made you very comfortable around him. You were shocked when you realized one afternoon, head thrown back at the sky as you laughed at some clever quip from him, that he had single-handedly returned your smile to you after your heartbreak. You felt a tiny bit of warmth wiggling in your chest.

         Walking once again toward the Flame Hashira’s estate, your arms swayed gently by your sides. With Sanemi to your left, you felt very relaxed after a long day of training and goofing off with him and Iguro. You were looking forward to a nice meal and a hot bath. A sigh slipped from your lips at the pure contentment you felt in this moment.

         Sanemi’s head turned toward you, seeking your eyes.

“Everything alright?”

“Perfect, ‘Snemi,” your tongue was loose in relaxation and a strange version of his nickname slipped out, alongside a giggle at the slip-up.

         His face stretched into a smile, which was rare for anyone besides you to ever see. Walking down the bumpy path leisurely, the backs of your hands kept brushing. The warmth you’d felt in your chest since seeing Sanemi every day turned into a flutter everytime you touched his skin. As his knuckles bumped yours again, you decided to be bold—it was about time you started going for what you wanted, right? You caught his hand in yours and laced your fingers through his calloused ones. Your heart stuttered at the contact, and if you’d asked him how he felt he’d say the same. He squeezed your hand in his and rubbed his thumb in soft circles as you approached your residence.

“Y/n, I was actually wondering if you wanted to hang out tomorrow? With me? Well, duh, but you know...” Sanemi trailed off, his cheeks turning that shade of pink that delighted you so much. He was always so confident in every other situation—in fighting, in conversation with others, in his strengths, and he had been confident in flirting if what you’d seen in past years through your friendship was anything to go off of. His shyness with you was endearing; it told you that he cared what you thought of him. You knew he also had a level of comfort with you that he didn’t possess with anyone else, but you hoped in the near future you could express to him exactly just how much you valued him so that he no longer had reason to be so shy around you anymore.

  “Nemi, we hang out every day. Of course, I would love to see you again tomorrow.”

He kept meeting your eyes but then looking away. “Well yeah, yes, we do, but I kind of want to do something different, if that’s okay. Like if you wanted we could walk to the trees where the cherry blossoms are and I’ll bring a bunch of food and we’ll have, like, a picnic or something.” Your heart had to have swelled to twice its normal size.

         Still holding his hand, you gave him a reassuring squeeze. “I would love to.”

He finally met your gaze for more than half of a second and his still-pink cheeks broke into a grin wider than you think you’d ever seen on him. You didn’t know if you’d ever seen anything cuter. “Okay, then perfect! And, just to be clear, I wanted this to be a date. Like, romantically.”

You laughed again, throwing your arms around his neck and nuzzling into his broad chest. “Yes, Nemi. I want this to be a date too.”

Pulling back, you looked at his face, and you couldn’t help it. You were smitten with your friend. Well, soon to be more-than-friend, right?

“Can I kiss you?”

His face dropped into a look of pure shock, then elation as he breathed out, “Yes, y/n. I would like nothing more.”

So you leaned in, and he did the same, meeting in the middle. Sanemi may look rough around the edges to everyone else—but to you, he was nothing but soft and sweet. His lips were soft, not just in texture but in pressure, as if he wanted to make sure he wouldn’t be too rough with you. Your lips moved together as if you’d done this before. Thinking about how you knew now Sanemi’s true feelings for you made you smile into the kiss, and you felt his lips turn upwards too. Both of you were hesitant to part, but you had to pull away when it became difficult to breathe. His lips followed yours, not wanting to break.

Sanemi rested his forehead against yours and your peered up into his eyes. You didn’t think you’d ever seen him look so relaxed or blissful. “I should go,” you said after a moment, pulling a sigh from his mouth. “I’ll see you tomorrow, Sanemi. We’ll have more time together then.”

“Alright. If you must go,” he replied, pressing a sweet kiss to your brow before stepping away, off to his own estate. You watched him go. For the first time in several months, you could see yourself being happy again.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

         A year later, you still walked everywhere with Sanemi, only now you two never went without your hands clasped tightly together. Your relationship with him had been completely different than the one before that had broken your heart. Sanemi held your hand with pride, he planted kisses on the top of your head and pecked your cheeks even when in the presence of others. When you became overwhelmed with how adorable your partner was and stretched up on your toes for a kiss, he still blushed if you two were in public, but he never turned down an opportunity to kiss his beloved. Not to mention, Sanemi never let a day go by without telling you he loved you. He didn’t really need to tell you in order for you to know—his actions spoke volumes about his true feelings—but each time he told you, you reveled in it and made sure to tell him the same back. And yes, you could say it to him anywhere, anytime without embarrassment or needing to play it off somehow.

His affection was shocking to others. The big, bad Wind Pillar who beat other slayers to a pulp at his trainings blushed when his girlfriend kissed him? He held her hand like his lifeline? His eyes weren’t full of hatred, but adoration? How could this be? Though this behavior was shocking to them when your relationship began, many were able to associate this new temperament to Shinazugawa fairly easily. While still rough in training sessions and prone to losing his temper, since he had been with you others could tell that he made a greater effort to hold his tongue or step away when upset rather than throw senseless punches. You made him want to do better for you, so he was better for you. He was a man of his word.

****

Now, when you walked Sanemi to a Hashira meeting, you placed a gentle kiss to his cheek and looked at the other hashira waiting in the Master’s garden. You waved first at Rengoku, who you’d see later on, then at Tomioka, who still hesitated to return your greetings even though you had released any anger you held toward him months ago. How could you hold anger toward your ex when you were so incredibly happy with Sanemi? Tomioka had taught you what you deserved, and Sanemi had been more than happy to put in work to be that for you. Now you could say with truth that you had no complaints.

[courtingchaos]

Tryouts

Bully Masterlist

Summary: Lucas and Max have a conversation without having one; end of summer signups begin.

Word Count: 1.7K

Warnings: None

A/N: I was gonna be corny here and talk about the long lead up but like, no one else has been anticipating me posting this the way I have. I’ve been on the edge of my own seat waiting and the muse finally came back from the corner store, surprisingly with the cigarettes she promised. This is a prelude of sorts, a small snippet of life outside of the main story. Expect more of these as it progresses, everyone is up to something.

No Explicit Content but 18+ No Minors

“Wait so you’re gonna actually try out for soccer?” Lucas stops walking out of shock while Max just keeps across the parking lot towards the arcade.

“It isn’t so much a ‘try out’ as it is ‘show up and be interested’.” She stops to wait for a car and shoots her boyfriend a look over her shoulder. “So don’t get too excited, they’ll take literally anyone.”

“Hey! I’ll be excited anyways!” He catches up to her at the door, shooting his arm around her to cut her off from grabbing it for herself. Lucas sees the eye roll and chooses to ignore it. “We can be like, an athlete couple.”

“Oh my god.”

“We could trade Lettermans.”

She tries to hide it but he can see her grin that she pulls off to the side of her face. “Sick. You’re sick Sinclair.”

“Oh come on, you know you want to.”

Max stops at the token machine to dig out her wad of dollar bills. “I don’t even know if I want to play! I’m just…looking for something to get me out of the house.”

Lucas leans on the top of the machine to singsong at her. “There’s always a seat at the table.” He wiggles his eyebrows and she hates that she laughs.

“In Wheeler’s fart infested basement? I don’t think so.” She scoops the tokens out to hand them to Lucas, her own personal coin purse while she keeps her high score for the afternoon. “He doesn’t make El do it so why should I be forced to play?”

“He doesn’t force her and plus, they aren’t talking right now.”

“What?” She whips her head to look at him. “She didn’t tell me anything!”

Lucas gives her a side eye before walking away towards the Dig Dug machine and Max follows him close, hands pulling at his shoulders to get him to stop moving, and when he doesn’t, fingers dig into his side to try and tickle it out of him.

“Tell me! What happened!” If this was anyone else she might consider this bullying with the way she pulls at the hem of his shirt and shakes his whole body when all he gives her for an answer is a laugh at her pretend annoyance. It isn’t until she manages to get a leg up off the stool and onto his back that he threatens to drop her tokens.

“If I get off you, you’ll tell me?” She asks him directly in his ear so he winces away with a chuckle.

“If you get off me I won’t drop your coins.”

Lucas hands her two tokens when she puts both feet on the ground and nods his head at the arcade. A silent standoff for a moment before Max gives up with a heavy sigh, sitting down when the tune jingles behind the screen.

“Okay, this morning Mike called to hang out and I told him we were gonna be busy but he could tag along if he wanted to.”

“Why do you do that?”

Lucas ignores her. “But he said he didn’t want to be around you because you were probably gonna make fun of him all day and if he wanted that, he’d just go over to El’s.”

“So they had another fight?”

“I guess? It sounds like she was teasing him about being in the basement all summer with his Nintendo and he blew up.”

Max frowns at the screen. “Did he say that? I don’t think I’ve ever heard him own up to a damn thing.”

“Surprisingly, yeah. He said that Hopper came in and told him to get the hell out if he was gonna yell like that.”

“He got yelled at by dad? No thank you.” She shakes her head a little to stop the memory of last night from resurfacing and of course Lucas catches it. Try as she might to keep her family stuff firmly behind the front door of their home, it’s been sneaking out lately and waving at anyone who pays attention, Lucas in particular.

“You okay?”

Her eyebrows knit before she can stop it but she’s focused on the game, fingers tapping on the thick buttons. If she doesn’t respond then maybe Lucas will shrug it off and keep telling her about Mike having a tantrum. Maybe he’ll tell her about the Fighter he built for her and try for the hundredth time this summer to get her to play the dumb dice game. Or maybe he’ll double down and bring up her brother’s black eye.

“I saw Billy peeling out earlier.”

There it is, she thinks to herself and holds back the eye roll. “So did half the neighbors. He likes the attention.”

“He stopped long enough to flip me the bird.” He laughs like it’s normal.

“Yeah?” The game means nothing now. Her fingers slap at the cabinet and Lucas just keeps looking at her with pity. “Well don’t feel bad for him, he should know when to shut up.” She acknowledges it but won’t name it, especially when she was there for its christening. Voices that raised over her headphones, the splintering of a mistreated door being kicked in for the twentieth time and a loud smack of knuckles before it’d gone silent. “He pushes Neil for fun.”

Lucas stares at her like everyone else has that’s ever seen her stepdad go off on his kid.

Max feels the lump crawling fast up her throat so she swallows to keep it tucked below her ribs where it can settle until later. “Lucas…” His name comes out soft on the end of a heavy sigh. She doesn’t really have anything to say, nothing she wants to admit to him right now, at least not while the sun is shining.

To his credit he looks uncomfortable in the face of her minor slip but it’s gone as soon as she notices it. “You’d tell me, wouldn’t you?”

Talking without talking. It’s like their special ability, their mutant powers, not quite mind reading but close. He asks her the obvious question without using the words so she isn’t embarrassed. So others don’t overhear.

She really thinks about it. Tries to remember a time that Neil had ever directed that temper at her and comes up with a blank. It’s always anger by association, always behind Billy when the blame rolls in no matter how loud she’d get about her part in the issue. That had only happened once and her mother had swiftly pulled her out of the room and into the car and they’d gone to the mall for most of the day. Max thinks about all the times she’s come home to a new bruise on Billy or another broken dish in the trash. She thinks about how Lucas has never seen the inside of her house but she’s been all over his, every nook and even through the attic, even through Mrs. Sinclair’s garden.

“Yeah.”

The game jingles at her in a mocking defeat but the wasted tokens don’t matter. She stares at Lucas who does his best to wait for her, his hands shoved far into his shorts pockets until she makes the slightest move for him and he wraps her in a hug, tight and lighting quick. Thankfully it’s lunch time and thankfully the attendant today has wandered off and thankfully it’s just them in the arcade with all its trills and beeps. Cabinet screens flash around them and all that matters is the hug and the quietly whispered “I’m sorry” that Lucas presses into the top of her head.

Lucas agreed to meet Max at the field ten minuets after her drop off time to avoid anymore general jackassery from Billy, but when he’d folded himself out of the backseat of Steve’s car he’d had to brace himself. The Camaro sat idling on the far side of the field with its owner leaning on the hood, a brunette vying for his attention next to him, but no redhead in sight.

“You okay?” Steve asks while pointedly staring at Billy across the field.

“Yeah I’m…he won’t do anything here.”

There’s the trill of whistles and Robin is shooting out of the passenger seat, cursing and slamming her foot into a cleat. “I told you we were gonna be late!” She screeches at Steve as she barrels down the small slope with her bag swinging wildly from her shoulder. She waves both hands at the coach and yells something about traffic and that’s when Dustin gets out of the car finally, his finger pointed to the middle of the group of girls.

“There she is.”

Red hair shines bright in the early morning sun and Lucas can’t help the smile that grows wide. Beside him Dustin nudges him, says something about googly eyes and makes his horrible whip sound but Lucas tunes him out. Max is tucked into herself until Robin pushes her way over and a smile appears, a laugh too when she points up to the three of them on the hill and she grabs Max’s hand to flop it at them in a crude wave.

Dustin waves back with the folded up signup sheet and he elbows Lucas again. “See man? Nothing to worry about.”

“I know. I just—“

“Worry?”

“Shut up.” It’s good natured. Dustin laughs and asks him again if he filled out the papers, if he brought his character sheet and it isn’t until Steve whistles at them and points to the school parking lot that Dustin finally cuts it out. A van has rumbled in and before it can park, a shaggy head pops out and looks around before throwing his hands up and yelling.

“Henderson!”

Dustin takes off, calling Lucas with him over his shoulder to follow, but Lucas hangs back for a minute. He watches Max whispering with Robin, can see her easing up. The smile hasn’t left her face, just faded into the conversation as she nods her head along to something said to her. Beside him Steve sighs when the horn on the van goes off three times in quick succession and Lucas looks over to see Dustin giving him a pointed, annoyed look.

“I’d go over there before he pisses Munson off.” Steve seems to be watching Lucas struggle to leave and he taps him on the arm to assure him. “I’ll keep an eye on her, okay? I promise I won’t let anything happen.”

“Thanks man.”

[taniks-the-final-shape]

Getting to know your moots

Thank you @baede-6 for tagging me in your post, I have done my best to copy the questions your post had and answered them myself!

What's the origin of your blog's title?

It is the same as my bungo username and the reason for that is simple! Back when Bungie gave players a free name change, I decided it would be funny to name myself this due to the downright stupid amount of times that Taniks (or some form of Taniks, cough cough nightmare Taniks cough cough) has been brought back only for the guardians to get him again.

Favorite Fandoms:

Off the top of my head, I’d have to say Destiny, Transformers, The Dragon Prince, Pixar, Marvel, Star Wars, and damn near everything Andy Weir has written(The Martian, my beloved. Along with Project Hail Mary, currently reading Artemis)

OTP(S) + shipname:

I don’t have any personal oc ships but in terms of Destiny, I. Love. Many of the relationships already in there. Such as Drifteris and Saintsiris.

Favorite Color:

I personally like red, especially when paired with black.

Favorite Game:

I can’t pin it down on any one thing but my most beloved games would have to be Destiny 2, Transformers: Fall of Cybertron, Star Wars: Jedi Survivor, Assassin’s Creed: Revelations (along with Black Flag), and Minecraft!

Song stuck in your head:

At this moment? Burn The House Down by AJR

Weirdest habit/trait:

Mmmmm, maybe softly bonking my friend’s shoulders with my head. No clue why I do it, I just do it because why not

Hobbies:

Besides playing games, watching movies, or listening to music, I enjoy writing Haikus down in a journal that I have (please ask me what Haikus I have I am desperate to share them)

If you could have any job you wish what would it be?

I’ve always wanted to be a video game developer, especially in regards to narrative. That’s mainly due to the fact of what the narrative team at Bungie have created, like how was I supposed to read ‘Hope is a currency. It buys tomorrow. It gives us what we need to survive today.’ And not go insane thinking about it. I’ve always wanted to create something like that for other gamers.

Something you're good at:

Making other people smile.

Something you're bad at:

Getting over procrastination.

Something you excel at:

Being calm under pressure and being that anchor for other people when they’re stressed

Something you love:

See hobbies, I love creating a haiku when any muse strikes!

Something you could talk about for hours without off the cuff:

Easily Destiny 2, I could talk about the lore for hours!

Something you hate:

I could go with broad stuff like a well-known rich person doing a well-known gesture on live television and other people bending over backwards saying that the gesture wasn’t *that* gesture. But besides that, I’d say getting error-coded while in the middle of a raid with friends on Destiny. Yeah that’s something that I’m pretty sure is hated universally.

Something you collect:

Transformers legos! I’ve only recently started it to the point where I only have less than five but I’m happy with what I have so far! I also like to collect Destiny 2 merch. I’ve got some shirts and a jacket right now!

Something you forget:

Hmmm, I think I forgot it.

What's your love language?

I’m a firm believer that everyone needs at least a little bit of each love language. Of course, it varies in volume and from whom you are receiving it from. I think my the biggest one I like getting is physical touch! I love hugs, give me all of the hugs.

Favorite movie/show:

Favorite movie is definitely a tie between Spider-Man: Into The Spider-Verse and Across The Spider-Verse. My favorite show might have to be Young Justice! Either that or Arcane, or Cyberpunk: Edgerunners. It’s hard to choose!

Favorite food:

Easily my dad’s smoked steak, I swear each and every time I take a bite into that stuff, it’s like I’m tasting heaven itself.

Favorite animal:

Gotta go with both wolves, bears, and owls!

Are you musical?

Oh absolutely, I really should take a video of myself killing it at any karaoke. Besides that, I love me a good musical. Personal favorites are Hamilton and The Guy Who Didn’t Like Musicals.

Favorite subject in school:

I’ve always loved theatre classes!

Least favorite subject:

Gonna have to go with science, that was a field I definitely struggled in.

What's your best character trait?

Hmm, I think I’d have to say how forgiving and understanding I am towards others

Worst character trait:

How unforgiving I am to myself, I am getting over it though. Bit by bit

If you could change any detail of your day right now, what would it be?

Hm, I don’t know. I like my day as it is

If you could travel in time,who would you like to meet?

Kevin Conroy, Lance Reddick, and Stan Lee! I want to meet them just so I can thank each of them for building key parts of my childhood.

Recommend one of your favorite fanfics:

I don’t read a lot of fanfics. But there are some posts by u/RewsterSause on Reddit’s r/DestinyJournals that I love to read. Rewster is one talented writer!

I do also like to rp a bit on here with some people!

Well, that appears to be all of the questions on here. Thank you again @baede-6 for tagging me!

I’m (also) going to tag some of my mutuals to answer these questions. But like baede said in her post, you do not have to feel obligated to answer them yourselves. See ya later fellas!

@keviriksiskellofhearts @clovis-bray-ate-my-son @drifterslittlemuffin @the-light-finds-its-way @ellis-the-lightguide @savyir-genesizz-the-wizard

[aranostra]

ooc // Okay now that I've had some sleep (not enough, but some), I feel like I need to clarify some stuff for the Interview with the Vampire crowd. (I'm pretty sure that anon I got was somebody from the tags, not a mutual but... I still want to clarify for everyone.)

First, when I'm talking about characterization etc, I'm talking about the show. I write my iwtv muses from the show.

I am going to be critical of Lestat on this blog. It is not because I hate him or because I think he's the only one who does anything bad in the series. I might go a little harder on him, because fandom in general often likes to ignore what he does wrong, but please understand. I first read iwtv and tvl when I was 10 years old. I have loved Lestat that whole time. He is actually my favorite in the books. Being critical isn't an attack on him or anyone who likes him, it is just part of how I enjoy media.

Criticizing Lestat doesn't mean I think Armand or Louis or anyone else in the Vampire Show is innocent. They are fucking vampires, my guys. Especially Armand. He is like... the embodiment of sexual and religious trauma. He holds to doctrine that harms others. He lies and manipulates. I explain why he does what he does, because I know he can be difficult to understand, because he does some horrific things. I just won't pretend that he is the only character who's caused harm.

That said, I'm not going to pretend Lestat didn't do any of the terrible things he did to Louis. I'm not going to pretend Louis deserved any of it. Louis can be difficult and Louis has very deep depressive episodes and Louis has some issues he has not dealt with but... he did not deserve how Lestat treated him.

Also not pretending Armand didn't do anything terrible to Louis. They were more mutually terrible to each other, in my opinion, but terrible nonetheless. Yes, Armand was heavily involved with the trial, but I see no evidence in show canon that the scenario was very much like the book--and I see some evidence of big changes from the book. Lestat doesn't seem weak, and he doesn't seem to lift a finger to stop what's happening before it starts even though he knew what was going on enough for there to have been multiple rehearsals. Lestat and Armand could've stopped it at basically any time--Louis destroyed the whole coven when he'd just been half starved. You can't tell me Armand and Lestat, who are both more powerful, couldn't have done the same if they wanted. Armand and Lestat let the trial happen. They let Claudia die. They are equally culpable in my opinion. Of course, the show might retcon due to the nature of storytelling etc, but from what evidence we have, that is what I believe happened.

Lastly, Lestat (or anybody else) does not need to be fully in the right and good and pure and perfect to be a great fucking character. I love these characters. A lot. Enough to put up with years in and around a fandom I find very stressful and occasionally triggering. I literally own 5 versions of The Vampire Lestat. There's a reason I have tons of threads with Lestat writers. I love that egotistical jackass. Just... please know that I'm not going to ignore his faults, and I'm not going to twist everybody else's characterization to justify Lestat's nonsense.

Anyway, please feel free to talk to me directly if you want to talk out characterization things. I don't mind disagreeing; I just don't like responding to anons about this kind of thing given some of the shit that's happened in this fandom over the last 10+ years.

[redlightspellsdaanger]

20 Questions for Fic Writers - Big thanks to the mega fabulous @kaossbells for tagging me!  

1. How many works do you have on AO3? 

22 (look at that, Jenson's racing number...) 

2. What’s your total AO3 word count? 

635,019

3. What fandoms do you write for? 

Only F1 now. In the past I've mostly written for Muse. I've also written for BBC Sherlock. I have been writing since I was a kid, though, so there was a lot of stuff that didn't even make it online, let alone to AO3 lol 

4. What are your top 5 fics by kudos? 

Dance Me To The Moon (F1 / Sebastian Vettel), Zero Minus Ten (Muse), Everything of Nothing (Muse), Never Dream of Dying (Muse) and Resistance (Muse) 

5. Do you respond to comments? Why or why not? 

Absolutely. Unfortunately it's very common that readers do not give the authors any feedback. So if someone goes out of their way to show any kind of support or, as some very kind people do, leave detailed reviews, I will be incredibly grateful and make sure to let them know. 

6. What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending? 

I often end my stories in a positive note, even the ones who have a vague or open ended finale. But I'd say a Muse one-off I wrote in 2009 called "Il Coma" was heavy for my standards. Also Never Dream of Dying, but that was part of a trilogy so not sure it counts. (well, the readers at the time were not pleased with the TBC, let's put it that way LOL)

7. What’s the fic you wrote with the happiest ending? 

Currently, on AO3, I think Dance Me To The Moon. I don't want to spoil but it's a romance so.... haha  

8. Do you get hate on fics? 

I don't remember ever getting hate tbh.  

9. Do you write smut? If so, what kind? 

Oh, yeah. Lots. Ha. All kinds. M/M. F/M. Threesomes. I've done PWP. I've done kink. I've done romance. I've done dubious/non-con. I've (literally) written smut sitting in a church. I've gotten to the point where I'm sort of getting bored of writing it.  

10. Do you write crossovers? What’s the craziest one you’ve written? 

Yes. I once wrote a Muse / BBC Sherlock crossover - Showbiz. It was incredibly fun to plot. It was well received, too, so I enjoyed that! The Mb-7 universe trilogy is also a crossover of sorts between Muse and Daniels Craig's James Bond, because characters such as M and Q feature.  

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen? 

If I did, I never noticed.  

12. Have you ever had a fic translated? 

I was once asked for permission for someone to translate a story, I felt very honoured! 

13. Have you ever co-written a fic before? 

Yes, the whole MB-7 trilogy was co-written with one of my best friends. 

14. What’s your all-time favourite ship? 

In F1 I will have to say Sebastian with Jenson or with Mark. (although in reality I like him with everyone lol). But Mulder / Scully from The X Files and Matt Bellamy / Dom Howard from Muse are probably my OTPs.

15. What’s a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will? 

I don't really have WIPs because although I have a lot of ideas and have plotted things in detail that never materialised, I only start writing once I am 100% I will write it in full.

The only exception - and therefore a regret I never finished - is a sequel to the BBC Sherlock / Muse crossover. I wrote a few pages and sadly that was it.

16. What are your writing strengths? 

Hard for me to answer this. But I try to make the characters as realistic and true to life as possible. I also make it a point of having a decently structured plot.  

17. What are your writing weaknesses? 

Oh, god, where to start. I feel immediately restricted in how and what I write because my command of English (as second language) is not as good as I wish it would be. Then I'm also a very slow writer and edit endlessly. I tend to repeat ideas and certain expressions. I don't know, we could be here all day lol  

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fic? 

Very cool! I love languages and especially in F1 it's very fitting.  

19. First fandom you wrote for? 

It was a TV show and I don't remember the name, I was a kid. The first one I do remember was for an American band called Matchbox 20.

20. Favourite fic you’ve written? 

This is SO hard to reply! I'm going to leave out one-shots (which kills me cos there is a few I still love) and mention only chaptered stuff:

Dance Me To The Moon (F1) because I never thought I'd be able to write a romance and I was so incredibly proud of myself, was fully emerged in it and I will carry these two with me for the rest of my life.

Resistance  (Muse) because it was the first time I wrote a novel length thriller that I felt had all I wanted and it was such an enjoyable process.

Everything or Nothing (Muse) because it was the first of the MB-7 trilogy, it was co-written, we adored our villain, the huge amount of nods to James Bond. And it kicked off a series with a level of plot intricacy that I will never be able to top.

Showbiz (Sherlock / Muse) because it was such a crazy crossover but I had so much fun dissecting Sherlock and I was very happy with the result.

Honourable nod to a figure skating fanfic I wrote with Alexei Yagudin / Michelle Kwan, years ago. It was self-indulgence of the greatest kind and I loved writing every word of it. I have no idea if it's online anywhere atm. I wish I could remember the title!

tagging @magnycours2004, and anyone who would like to participate!!!

[rachelsshowerthoughts]

So you know how some fics have like "Andre Sugar" in the tags to indicate he'll not be portrayed as the bastard he is in S1/3?

I came up with an alternative type of tag, "Character X Cinnamon" with it basically being:

If this character is so good you are giving them some sin to spice things up. But if they are too evil you are adding a little bit of 'sweetness' without forgetting what they are.

In this context, an Audrey cinnamon fic would be like... she stumbles on a conversation Chloe is having with Andre trying to get comfort & advice on impressing Audrey & the mix of how that interaction looks and what Andre says.

IE stuff that makes it quite clear he's done nothing to disabuse Chloe of the notion Audrey just needs to be impressed to love her when frankly Audrey just does not fucking 'want' to parent & made that clear many times over.

Well it leaves her a little... Off, it feels a little too familiar, and a little too scummy for her to just write it off as Andre's usual neediness and simpering explanations and excuses for anything that creating problems in his life.

Cue, this is just an idea it could go many way, pulling Sabine aside at the fashion show either day 1 or 2 and being like.

"Your family's mundane. Tell me, does Andre's relationship with Chloe seem normal to you?" "...." "That silence does not fill me with confidence, unless you misunderstood." "I understood you fine, I was just thinking. But no, it does come off a little unseemly." "Dammit all." "Why are you bringing this up so suddenly, did you just notice?" "Obviously, why else would I be bringing it up this moment, use your head." "I can see where Chloe got her charming personality from." "I didn't raise her, if she's like me its... Ugh, because Andre probably wanted her that way, or is that assuming things? I don't know when children start thinking for themselves." ".... You should speak to Madame Bustier, her teacher, she might be of more help." Audrey's head tipped back in a beleaguered groan.

Basically Audrey's still fucking awful but she has like a handful of barely coherent & even contradictory standards for what she deems acceptable. Andre being a raising his daughter to be Audrey's carbon copy but one that 'needs' him & encouraging her to appeal to a woman he knows will reject her happens to tick such a box.

So she's going to have to do something about it, but she A, has zero idea what she's doing, B, fucking HATES doing it and C, is still by and large otherwise the worst (tm)

Like such a story would not end in Audrey being all, "Oh I actually want to be a mother & make up for lost time."

But more like, "I made a stupid decision having a child when I didn't want one & have neither the heart nor capabilities to parent. But I will do the right thing here; I am gonna be real bitter about it though."

This spin on Audrey would sort of rely on taking her abuse as mostly just her being indifferent to Chloe in a "I did not want to be a parent" way and so she treats her like everyone else. IE like shit.

As opposed to her having any other kind of motive or reasons for said behavior or there being more to said abusive behavior than what was seen. Which is very easy to conclude by just watching and musing but isn't like, overtly canon.

I feel like I am making this come off as more lighthearted than intended, but that's more a reflection of Audrey's like... Vibe? Sort of like how everything's more somber and clinical from Gabriel's perspective even if its a crack comedy story.

Audrey's perpetually proud, unsatisfied and irritable with little desire to empathize or wallow in any negative emotions that aren't anger or satisfaction born or breaking something. She might be better-ish at the end of such a story but she'd not do a 180 like Andre's shown to do in such fics.

Part of what would be good for Chloe in it is getting that sense of why her mothers like that, that Audrey being shitty isn't on her, and eventually kind of untethering Audrey from "mom" to just, "A woman". So she can seek out connections with people who can and will actually give her what she needs in a paternal relationship.

So, first, sorry this one took me so long to respond to, I've been sick for a few days, and swinging between "coherent" and "what time is it? Sleep, I guess"!

I do like the idea, and think it’s fairly funny, but . . . I'll be honest, I tried to imagine Audrey doing this and just. My brain was like "Error 404, File not found". I COULD NOT imagine Audrey Bourgeois doing this, or being like this. Like, at all. It would not compute in my head. The only way I could think about this idea working was to try and apply it to a different character, then smack it Audrey's name on it.

(Which, again, I'm currently kind of sick, so it could be that - though my friend Mimi started cackling at the fact someone suggested Audrey being in anyway even REMOTELY decent and I basically bluescreened)

If I was doing this, I think I would have some definite character growth for Audrey. Like you say, she still doesn’t become a "good" person. She doesn’t miraculously want to be a mom, or realize that she really DOES love Chloé. But I'd have her grow a bit as a character, to at the very least, treat everyone a little less shitty. Like, she's still blunt, and kind of a bitch, but she becomes a less toxic person overall. She learns how to communicate with other people, figures out how to . . . . I was going to say, "stop insulting everyone", but maybe "be less insulting" is more believable. She isn’t ever going to be "mom" or even "mom-adjacent", but she learns to stop penalizing Chloé for not living up to her impossible standards. She figures out how to interact at least neutrally with Chloé, who, whether she likes it or not, she's responsible for.

Chloé, meanwhile, yeah, should learn to disconnect "Audrey Bourgeois" from the idea of "Mom", which, I'm not sure about how easy that would be. It's definitely going to suck. But, and I'm not sure about this, I feel like Audrey and Chloé should at least develop a rapport. A comfortable way to interact with each other. Cause, at least until Chloé is eighteen, Audrey is partially responsible for her. I'm not saying Audrey has to be loving mom, or that Chloé needs to be "mini-Audrey", but they do need a healthy way to communicate. I think the end result should be something like "distant aunt". Like, you're family, you'll help each other out if you need it, you'll send a wedding invite, and occasionally update each other, but you aren’t super close, and you don’t talk much.

Though, for any of this, I think Audrey would need to divorce André and take custody of Chloé. Like, she doesn’t particularly CARE about being married to André - it’s a status thing, security, and Audrey can deal with him. But Cholé can't (that's the point of all this) so Audrey would need to get Chloé away from him, make sure he doesn’t have any legal say in Chloé at all. And that would be a hell of a headache for all involved.

(Somehow, during this, Hawk Moth's identity comes out. Audrey is left to question how SHE is somehow being a better parent than Gabriel, because my god, the bar is SO LOW, it is literally an INCH off the ground, yet somehow he isn’t clearing it.)

though, afterward, I can see Audrey setting Chloé up with her own place in Paris, with either a paid live-in bodyguard, or regular check-ins or something. Hell, have her move in with Marinette or something, and Audrey sends an allowance. Like, I don’t see Chloé actually wanting to permanently leave Paris, Audrey doesn’t want to stay (she has work), so they figure out some arrangement that lets her stay in Paris.

[wingsoar]

SHIPPING INFO. Answer the following for your muse(s) so people know how shipping works on your blog.

What’s your OTP for your Muse(s)? I - don't have one. I feel I've lost the desire to think of ships and stuff, mostly because whatever I liked... wasn't particularly popular. So, now I'm like. #SurpriseME.

What are you willing to RP when it comes to shipping? Mostly anything, though I really don't write nsfw much.... and by that I mean I've only written it with one person. I felt okay writing it with them because we had similar thoughts, like we both hated vulgarity ... ya know. "HE SHOVED HIS ****** INTO HER *****" .... and so on. it was steamy but like, classy. we also had a lotttt of ship build up etc. talked everyday, bantered IC .... felt they really and truly enjoyed shipping with me, I wasn't an 'extra' .... so that was a bonus.

How large does the age gap have to be to make it uncomfortable? Uhh. It's hard to say, I'll go by physical appearance since a character could be a billion years old but look and act the exact same age as my muse haha. - if they could pass for my muse's parent.... I'd rather not

Are you selective when shipping? In a way, yeah. My struggle with ships is people will approach me for one and then ...sorta poof? Or they're really just not that interested. And I can tell .... usually they prefer another ship, which is totally fine but then I'm like.... "why did you ask me?" ..... fjrijiwf. I'm still open to trying, but if my rp partner is sorta, eh.... I'll drop the ship.

How far do steamy moments have to go before they’re considered NSFW? again I've only written nsfw once hahaha, but I guesss ....when things start getting extra touchy-feely?

Who are other muses you ship your muse with? sobs, none..... my shippers brain has given up trying, no motive ... so I'm open to anything really.

Does one have to ask to ship with you? I prefer things blossoming in a thread without actually plotting it out. I like surprises but ...I understand my partners may want confirmation, so I'm totally cool with being asked. I just...I miss, letting the thread decide how things go. Unspoken character chemistry through interactions.

How often do you like to ship? It's nice having at least one cute lil ship for a muse but it won't ruin my rping experience to not have any at all. - As I mentioned above ... I sorta feel like an 'extra' sometimes, so like... yes I would like a ship but then I'm like.. ehhhhhhh...........

Are you multiship? Gonna be real, I'm only multiship because a majority of tumblr rpers are haha. i'd be more than happy to ship exclusively with one person if we had that sort of love for the ship / connection. fjeifwjf.

Are you ship obsessed or ship more-or-less? Not obsessed, like everyone else I just want to write romantical things sometimes.

What is your favorite ship in your current fandom? Again I don't have anything for Robin but ... in general? I love March/Dan Heng. it is chefs kiss!

Finally, how does one ship with you? Haha I think I've answered this sorta but ... interactions, asking - whatever works best for us both.

tagged by: @malumae (thank uuuu) tagging: Whoever is reading this at this very moment.

[hearthouses]

Twenty Questions for Fic Writer

Tagged by @pelopides

How many works do you have on ao3?

67. I would have more if I transferred more LJ stuff over, but I am largely embarrassed by those works.

What's your total ao3 word count?

282,047 words.

What fandoms do you write for?

I am going to list the major ones, but I dipped my toes in The Borgias, The Magicians, and Good Omens. But the ones I’ve written the most for are:

A Song of Ice and Fire - George R. R. Martin

From Dusk Till Dawn: The Series

IT (Movies - Muschietti)

Supernatural (TV 2005)

The Vampire Diaries (TV)

What are your top 5 fics by kudos?

you call my name and it feels like home (1,197 kudos)

i grow green with hope (599 kudos)

desire holds me like a knife (493 kudos)

twenty-one grams (493 kudos)

The Whispering Ghosts (Left You Out In The Cold) (433 kudos)

Do you respond to comments? Why or why not?

The most honest answer is: I try, but sometimes my neurotic anxious parts of my brain take over and I don’t reply. As a commenter and reader, I personally don’t mind if the author doesn’t reply back because I don’t wish to be perceived, but I’m also not sure what the etiquette is anymore. Do they also want me to reply to their reply? Is this a conversation now? I think AO3 changed a lot of fandom norms and expectations because I don’t remember being this conscious of myself and comment threads were the norm. But anyway, the tl;dr of it: I try and work up the nerve and sometimes I fail, sometimes I do it months later, sorry!

What is a fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

I tend to write ambiguous to hopeful endings, so this was hard to determine, so I think it is a tie between The Whispering Ghosts (Left You Out In The Cold) and Watch Your Step (You'll Need A Miracle). The former because the entire fic is bleak and the ending is essentially more of the same, while the latter is about the emotional shattering of someone post-assault.

What's the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

This question is very subjective because I tend to write things that might not be considered happy for some people, but are happy to me. In a more traditional sense, twenty-one grams feels the most happy because the rest of the fic is a grueling exercise in grief and eventually Eddie is brought back to life and everyone can move forward, so the relief is palpable. But on an iddy level, my favorite happy ending is we could live forever in each other’s faces because I want Sam and Dean to have a baby and rule together in Hell forever and ever.

Do you get hate on fics?

Yes. I used to get a lot of angry comments in the From Dusk Till Dawn: The Series fandom, and recently I had a lot of disgruntled people on my most recent fic. It could be my long-term anonymous hater, but who knows.

Do you write smut?

Yes! I used to not be able to and I thought I would never be capable of it, but I feel pretty good about my smut writing skills.

Do you write crossovers? What's the craziest one you've written?

I did back in the day, but it was largely Supernatural/One Tree Hill crossovers because I was sixteen and afraid to admit I shipped Sam/Dean. I do muse about crossovers from time to time because I want my faves to meet and I think a lot about how they would interact, but those stories are often low priority for me.

Have you ever had a fic stolen?

Apparently! Someone was reposting fics on Wattpad and one of my Richie/Eddie fics was reposted. It was deleted before I could report it myself.

Have you ever had a fic translated?

A couple! It was an interesting and flattering experience.

Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fic?

I can't do that because I don't speak any other languages.

Have you ever co-written a fic before?

Yes, with @ladyculebras. We often do round robin experiments and exercises, and we posted devour me (if you really think that you can stomach me) because the exercise kept going and we finished the piece.

What's your all-time favorite ship?

Sam/Dean is one of my longest running OTPs, so that feels like the obvious answer, but I never stop feeling feelings for my OTPs, they tend to go into hibernation until I am attacked with feelings and I spiral. Some of my OTPs I don’t write fic for, but still have an immense amount of feelings for. Right now off the top of my head, the OTPs swirling around in my brain at any given time are: Sam/Dean, Louis/Lestat (and Louis/Lestat/Claudia), Seth/Richie, Sam/Tara, Richie/Eddie (and Losers Club OT7), Quentin/Eliot, Geralt/Yennefer, Coriolanus/Lucy Gray/Serjanus, Katniss/Peeta (and Katniss/Peeta/Haymitch), Archie/Betty/Jughead/Veronica.

What's a wip you want to finish, but doubt you ever will?

I have a huge graveyard of unfinished WIPs for fandoms past that I am sure I will never finish, so it is easier to answer that there are a few WIPs I really do want to finish some day. My exit from the IT fandom wasn’t really something I wanted to do, but needed to do for my mental health, but I hope to return and finish some fics when I have more distance. From Dusk Till Dawn: The Series is the fandom I have the most written in and I would like to finish my longer stories in the future.

What are your writing strengths?

I love writing prose and my descriptions are very lush. I also have a strong handle on emotion and using acts of intimacy to push the story forward, but also explore character. I’m good at character and relationship studies. I think I’m adept at writing hot sex scenes. I also have a flair for horror in ways I don’t often employ, but love when I get to.

What are your writing weaknesses?

I need to learn how to not get stuck in my own head and trip all over myself and my insecurities. My biggest hurdle is myself and my own mental hangups. I need to learn that it's okay to experiment and try new things and that I don’t need to please everyone, or be liked, I just need to please myself. I also need to work on not being afraid to write longer stuff and embrace that my brain has a lot of ideas that will take time to write

First fandom you wrote for?

Harry Potter. I still have the handwritten notebook pages from when I was 11.

Favorite fic you've written?

I can’t answer this question because if I look at my fics, I will see the flaws. I will say I am proud of everything I finish because it’s often a battle of wills.

Tagging: Anyone who wants to do this and hasn’t been tagged yet!

[sodaliteskull]

Writerly Questionnaire

Thank you for the tag on this, @harmonic-melodii! Check out how she responded to this over here!

Gonna have this one be an open tag for EVERYONE, so if you're looking for the questions, head on over here!

About You

When did you start writing?

Kindergarten, so when I was either 5 or 6? lol I wanted to write sooner, but I didn't quite grasp the mechanics of how to actually do that, but the second I learned how to read and write, I could not be stopped! I know the first story I wrote was about dinosaurs, because I was OBSESSED with dinosaurs at that age.

Are the genres/themes you enjoy reading different from the ones you write?

I like reading hard sci-fi, but I hate writing it! Trying to make sure everything is as scientifically accurate (or at least plausible) as possible is not where I find my joy in writing. I'm much more of a "technobabble something that sounds reasonable but don't elaborate further" girlie when it comes to my own stuff.

Is there an author (or just a fellow writer!) you want to emulate, or one to whom you’re often compared?

None that I really want to emulate, or any I get compared to that I can recall. lol not to be trite, but I'm trying to develop my own writing voice, rather than mimic someone else's!

Can you tell me a little about your writing space(s)? (Room, coffee shop, desk, etc.)

I Mostly write at my desktop computer, and my desk is currently swamped in assorted stationary bits and bobs I haven't had the time or energy to sort through recently! Otherwise it's with my laptop in bed (being absolutely blasted by my fan, because I hate being hot), or hopping around town with my bestie to find cafes where we can get in joint writing sessions.

What’s your most effective way to muster up some muse?

Thinking about elements (settings, tropes, themes, stuff like that) from pieces of media that I like and breaking them down to get to the core of what sets me off like a boiling tea kettle about them.

Did the place(s) you grew up in influence the people and places you write about?

I've always lived somewhere with quick access to the forest and the sea, so the both of those tend to crop up in my writing, even when I don't intend them to. lol basically all my stories are like the sci-fi and fantasy shows of the aughts, in that they were "filmed" in the Vancouver/Lower Mainland area!

Are there any recurring themes in your writing, and if so, do they surprise you at all?

Alienation tends to crop up in my writing, as well as people struggling against exploitation. I also tend to write about some kind of rebellion against some form of authority. None of them surprise me in the least!

Your Characters

Would you please tell me about your current favorite character? (Current WIP, past WIP, never used, etc.)

Iradurel, one of the protagonists from the Starcrossed Cycle, because she is such a shit disturber! She has no respect for authority and doesn't bother sugarcoating her words, so I use her to vent every nasty little thought I have about behaviours in people I have to bite my tongue about in my day to day. It's always cathartic when I write dialog for her!

Which of your characters do you think you’d be friends with in real life?

Probably Ryla, the other protagonist of the Starcrossed Cycle. She'd be happiest avoiding drama and just spending her days indulging her curiosities, and that is something I would also like to do. We'd be study buddies!

Which of your characters would you dislike the most if you met them?

Rounding this out with the antagonist of the Starcrossed Cycle, Ransaran, who is a conglomeration of traits that I hate! I literally designed this asshole to encompass everything that I loathe in a person, so we would not get along!

Tell me about the process of coming up with of one, all, or any of your characters.

I'm usually a plot first kind of writer, with either a beginning or an ending clearly in mind. I then start with really broad stroke archetypes (something like The Witch, or The Ace Pilot) that I think would either get me to the ending I want, or shoot off from my starting point in interesting directions, and use that as a metaphorical armature that I can slap on the equally metaphorical clay that is tropes and traits until I like the shape of the character.

Do you notice any recurring themes/traits among your characters?

I've been making them queer since before I realized that I, myself, was queer!

How do you picture them? (As real people you imagined, as models/actors who exist in real life, as imaginary artwork, as artwork you made or commissioned, anime style, etc.)

I rarely imagine real people when coming up with characters (which kinda blows, because using actors to make gifsets of my characters is something I want to do!), and instead tend to visualize them in whatever style of animation (traditional or cgi) I last happened to watch. Been usingvideo game character creators, dollmakers, and picrews for years to help with the visualization process, because my own drawing skills are rather lacking!

Your Writing

What’s your reason for writing?

There's so much noise inside me, and writing is the most efficient way to quiet that!

Is there a specific comment or type of comment you find particularly motivating coming from your readers?

I like being able to lay out enough breadcrumbs that readers get an idea of what I'm leading to, so having people correctly guess the broad strokes of what I'm planning is always cool! Incoherent screaming is also a good one.

How do you want to be thought of by those who read your work? (For example: as a literary genius, or as a writer who “gets” the human condition; as a talented worldbuilder, as a role model, etc.)

I want people to wonder what is wrong with me. lol but for real, being known for mashing up wildly different concepts would be kind of cool.

What do you feel is your greatest strength as a writer?

I'm pretty good at finding connection points to link disparate plot elements together.

What have you been frequently told your greatest writing strength is by others?

The most common one I hear is that I come up with some interesting turns of phrases.

How do you feel about your own writing? (Answer in whatever way you interpret this question.)

I'm catering to my own likes when it comes to writing, so I enjoy it quite a lot!

If you were the last person on earth and knew your writing would never be read by another human, would you still write?

Well yeah! I write everything for myself as is, so having no readers beyond myself would not hinder me at all!

When you write, are you influenced by what others might enjoy reading, or do you write purely what you enjoy? If it’s a mix of the two, which holds the most influence?

Since I write for myself, I selfishly fill my writing with things I know I'm going to like. Otherwise, if I know a certain person is going to be reading what I wrote, I'll throw in something that (I hope!) would delight them specifically.

[vartouhix]

WHAT NOT TO DO WHEN INTERACTING WITH MY BLOG - Customizable Edition

BASICS !

Name / Alias: Luna.

Pronouns: she/her.

Blog type: single muse | multi-muse | non selective | semi selective | selective | mutuals only | private | other (specify: we don't have to be mutuals to do threads together! as my rules state, sometimes i don't like someone reblogging a lot of stuff on dash, so i unfollow to keep my dash cleaner... OR, i haven't followed back because i haven't thought of anything good to write between our muses. we can still interact, however! just send me a dm to plot or a meme for me to try to cook up a starter for our muses :3 if i haven't thought of anything good to write between our muses, i'll be relying heavily on you during plotting, tho! just a heads up.)

Type of muses: canon | OCs | both | other (specify: ehhhh... you mean MY muse or others'? MY muse is an OC, but I accept OCs and canons!)

GENERALITIES !

Triggers people MUST tag: doubtful that anyone would reblog this, but visual depictions--like a gifset or art--of sa.

Interest tracker / checker: I have it and it's mandatory | I have it, it's not mandatory but I'm more likely to follow back / interact with the people who fill it | I have one and I prefer it if people fill it in | I have it but it's to people whether to fill it or not | I don't have one | other (specify)

Reblog karma: I practise it | I practise it sometimes | I don't practise it | I always reblog memes from the source | indifferent | other (specify)

Rule passwords: I have one and it's mandatory | I have one and it's optional | I don't have one | I send passwords | don't sent passwords | [space for eventual additions / explanations]

3-5 ESSENTIAL RULES PEOPLE HAVE TO RESPECT

please be patient. sometimes i am just very tired and don't have the wherewithal to plot/write. i'm always looking for new writing partners, but i can be slow about reading through a muse's lore. (i will always read the rules before i follow.) if i don't reach out to you to plot or for a thread or something for a while, it's just because i'm distracted/tired/still thinking/still need to read thru things and brainstorm some stuff.

communication! let me know if you want to drop a thread. let me know if you want more than one thread. let me know if you have a problem with something. ask me if you think you need to godmode a little so i can let you know what my character would react like, so that you can include it in your reply. let me know if you want to ship or do an au. just let me know what you're thinking! ^^

aaaaaaall sorts of shipping rules can be found here, but the main takeaway is that shipping is based on chemistry!

please don't give me starters or send me asks about how pretty a color her hair is. it bores me to tears and i've gotten SO MANY over the past ten years of rping her.

3-5 IMPORTANT PET PEEVES TO KEEP IN MIND

no guilt tripping! whether that be about wanting your muse's feelings for mine to be reciprocated, or about replying to a thread/meme.

please help me "water your mutuals' gardens"... not just mine but others on the dash too! i hate seeing others feel left out ):

do not come at me for playing with multiple of the same canons/face claims. i believe that every interpretation of a canon muse is different and valid, and i do not treat them as interchangeable with another muse. i cannot control for what face claims are used for muses whose lore i find interesting, either. i can promise you that i appreciate you and your muse and you are NOT replaceable to me. simply put, i do not limit myself to interacting with x number of canons/face claims because i want to give everyone whose lore is interesting to me a chance.

2-5 THINGS THAT WILL LEAD TO INSTANT (SOFT)BLOCKING

callouts. i know how to keep myself safe online. if you or others don't and you had a bad experience with an individual, my opinion is keep it to yourself and move on. i find that people who try to "bring problematic behavior to light" are never the angels they make themselves out to be, and as a result i am wary of callouts.

reblogging too much real world stuff. i am a very anxious individual, especially about the state of the world we live in. i get enough political/world stage talk from my family and it spikes my anxiety. this is my escape and i intend to curate my experience here so that i'm not anxious, thanks. couldn't tell you how often is "too often" or how much is "too much," though.

2-5 THINGS THAT LEAD ME TO UNFOLLOW / SOFTBLOCK A MUTUAL / SOMEONE I INTERACT WITH

months of inactivity.

too many non-writing related reblogs. like pics, ooc posts, inspo posts, etc. again, couldn't tell you how many is "too many."

2-5 REASON YOU DON'T TO FOLLOW (BACK) SOMEONE

no rules page. if an oc, no information page about the muse will also make me wait until there's more for me to learn.

you don't mention your age somewhere.

tagged by: stole it :3 tagging: EVERYONE!!! I WANNA KNOW MORE ABOUT U ALL <3

[eclipsecrowned]

s.tormlight for the fandom meme 🩷 & stormlight! (for the fandom thing) // @dcviline + @weavinglight

The first character I first fell in love with: Jasnah. It was immediate, and I never recovered. Her poise, her wits, her Ace rep, her capacity for good as well as her ability to be that bitch. Will not lie, my bestie hyped her up and she has not disappointed me once.

The character I never expected to love as much as I do now: He was just one-armed comic relief. Now I muse the little bastard. I thought he might be somewhat cringe comedy and tbh as it was my first Sanderson outing I didn't know what to expect when I heard 'Mexican-coded comic relief' but tbh? He's my one hand arm man, my confidant, my best friend, my silly mink. Love The Lopen, no notes.

The character everyone else loves that I don’t: This is such a cop out but I can't think of any universally beloved characters I don't like? One of the gifts of the series to me is the nuanced and thoughtful characterization of each main player, making them feel more well-rounded than a lot of fantasy without any of them bleeding into each other/relying on authorial tropes. Even stuff I don't like about them, I understand or respect from the sense of 'this character is a tool of the story and is performing that function spectacularly.' The work is put in such that I don't really dislike any of the fandom favs like the Kh0lins, Bridge Crew, Sz*th, etc -- I just side-eye some of their choices.

The character I love that everyone else hates: Moash, and it's downright pathological how much this fandom has it out for him. I get he's a villain and makes some really selfish, awful, narrative-redefining decisions, but there's some takes out there that frankly make me wonder if people read the same book I did. To wit, there is discourse surrounding if this man kicked a literal infant. I, meanwhile, am damn near his public defender at this point. He has layers. He's so Cool Motive Still Murder coded.

The character I used to love but don’t any longer: Dalinar is really one of those characters where your feelings about him get more complicated on a reread. He's still wonderful in narrative and a favorite because no one else in the genre is doing it like him but... Holy shit dude. The way his flashbacks reframe everything. Where is the justice for my girl Evi --

The character I would totally smooch: OK SO FUNNY STORY ax the bestie that got me into the series called my dyke ass would be bewitched by Jasnah. She's so my type it hurts. But they forgot a core aspect of my being: I'd do anything for a MILF. I love Jasnah -- twenty years older and a little more plush, since it's established she's a younger version of her mother. The LOML. My queen. Navani. I get choked up remembering she wasn't getting the good good for 6 years --

The character I’d want to be like: The way I actually want a Dalinar quote tattooed on my body. The way I strive for that level of getting my shit together and turning it around. The way I want to be Evi and Navani's husband. Wait what no delete that footage --

The character I’d slap: Can I lovingly backhand my beloved Moash just to try and convince him he's in a cult and needs to get back on that whole 'destroy the system' wagon? Not even like a hard slap. Just something less taxing than killing one of his buddies to realize how far he's fallen.

A pairing that I love: Have you heard the news of our lord and savior Szopen -- Jokes aside, I am not immune to mad scientist war criminal crab milfs and their captive engineering genius morally complex human milf. Navaniel or bust. It's everything I have ever wanted in my life.

A pairing that I despise: SHALAD1N. Obscuring it so I don't post negativity in the proper ship tag but oh my God my genuine fear is that given the nature of Sandertropes Adolin is gonna be the deadpool for KoW, Shallan will be our grieving widow protag, and 15 years later she and Kaladin hook up. Don't get me wrong! I love their dynamic platonically! I'm not even opposed to Shakalodin! But they NEED that buffer, I can't stand the thought of them 1:1'ing this ship. There's too much between them, too much trauma overlap and high key inflicted on each other, for me to see the endgame appeal. I think it'd self destruct messily and leave them both worse. They need sunshine boy or the romance will tear itself apart.

[hellishvxbes]

🔥🔥🔥

Send me a “ 🔥 “ for an unpopular opinion. Bonus points if you include a topic. ( IE. shipping, roleplaying, ect. )

Okay. I struggled to come up with some topics to talk about for a while plus just issues through the entirety of this week. BUT I FIGURED IT OUT.

🔥 - PROMOS. tbh, promo's main use were to help roleplayers find other roleplayers, to spread the word about your blog and find more partners and people to make friends and broaden your experiences with learning about new and exciting fandoms. Now I just find them tedious, and annoying to make. if you aren't a popular blog the odds of your promo being reblogged and spread around is so minimal. it also just feels like clout chasing at this point. and yeah nothing wrong with reblogging your promo and having your friends hype you up, but then ppl wonder why they think the rpc is so alienating? cuz someone else will reblog their promo's expecting the same thing and they don't get it and then they feel left out. but if its just so you can get some nice thrown at you, it just feels like more clutter for my dash especially if I'm already following you. now if you're a NEW blog. if you just joined a fandom, and you want some exposure, I'm down for that because that is what a promo is supposed to be for.

🔥 - Personals. I actually like personals. sometimes personals care more about what I post than my own followers. i get ppl being upset if they reblog their threads, but liking your posts? and maybe reblogging a headcanon or something but idk i guess for me that stuff just doesn't bother me. I love when people reblog my headcanon and they agree. or they add onto it, with their own thoughts. or they tell me how much they love it. makes me feel seen. makes me feel cool. i just think people forget that tumblr is NOT a roleplay site. yes, we found a use to tailor it to our hobby, that doesn't mean everyone who comes across our blogs know that. they arent apart of our community, what makes you think they have to abide our guidelines for it? tbh, roleplayers have just gotten entitled to thinking that tumblr is supposed to bow to our whim. we share a space with non roleplayers. to demand, and just expect ppl are just going to see your rules and read them and respect it rght away?? come on ya'll. we know to look for rules cuz its what we've been doing for years, but you can't expect that from strangers who are likely mobile bound just seeing something you wrote in the tags. its gonna happen. i just dont like the mannerisms some people have with them. you dont gotta be rude about it. if its really bothering you just block them and be done. problem solved. going out of your way to make posts about how annoying they are is just unnecessary.

🔥 - duplicates. this is one is gonna get me fired but oh well. Ya'll we have GOT to love ourselves better. because it is plain and simple insecurity for why people feel they cant talk or write with duplicates. i know it does deeper in some cases, like your current partner leaving you for the shinny new roleplayer of the same muse you write. believe me I've been there. but fuck those people. when are we gonna stop letting others dictate how we feel about ourselves? i hate seeing shit when a new roleplayer pops up with the same muse and suddenly you get the vaguing posts about 'suddenly feeling very doubtful of my portrayal' like its not obvious you are threatened. and in this fandom??? we're i follow like 30 different alastors?? lucifers?? Angels"?? all different, all got something to add and share. i got news for you but your portrayal isnt the only ONE. its not the end all be all. and yes I talk to my ego all the time, cuz there are some muses i write where i'm like I AM THE GOD FATHER OF THIS MUSE. but thats me and my own pride, doesnt mean anyone else who writes this muse is less than me. or i'm suddenly less than them. and there are portrayals i dont fuck with. i simply just do not look their way. but theres always muses i love roleplaying with duplicates cuz its FUN. also being able to talk to people who love this muse as much as you?? learn to stop looking at everything like its a competition and things will not be as stressful. its what makes this hobby unfun when you let those insecurities eat you up. im not saying its not valid, and im not saying you cant be upset, but what does it really do for you? what would happen if you just went and talked to them? imagine it goes well? you make a new friend. dont deny yourself opening a door just because you are scared of what 'might' be behind it. and its something I am learning and teaching myself. our issue is we all wanna be see, and heard. we all wanna be the absolute best. we wanna have the best portrayal like this sort of acknowledgement does anything. cuz while I know ppl love my own portrayals, still doesn't change the fact that i got issues and i cry myself to sleep still. the 'love' i get on here, ain't a fix. and if you think seeking validation on tumblr dot com is gonna fix you? its not. the attention and love we seek on here is just a placeholder, its us using this as a distraction from actually fixing our problems, and turn i still see how so many of us are unhappy. let it go.

[whataboutthefish]

20 questions for fic writers

Thanks to @mayalaen for tagging me!

First, my AO3

How many works do you have on AO3?

84

2. What’s your total AO3 word count?

891,404

3. What fandoms do you write for?

Currently write for Stranger Things. Fandoms I have written for include, Witcher, Hannibal, SPN and i've poked around in the Marvel Universe

4. What are your top 5 fics by kudos?

Like Fine Wine - The witcher - moresome, omegaverse Masked Protection - Hannibal - Hannigram, omegaverse Yeah you made me feel - Stranger Things - Steddie, omegaverse I've been in Chains - Stranger Things - Steddie, omegaverse If I should fall - Stranger Things - Steddie, omegaverse Guess what my favourite trope is

5. Do you respond to comments? Why or why not?

I love to respond to comments, sometimes it takes me a bit because I get overwhelmed but I adore them and read them several times.

6. What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

A witcher fic that I love The final Winter Jaskier dying of old age as his Witchers that remain youthful hold him and love him as he goes.

7. What’s the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

Probably Yeah you made me feel. It's a loss of virginity fic that is just so sweet and hot.

8. Do you get hate on fics?

I have done on Twitter which really fucked me up - but that's a hellsite so we won't count that, beside the odd weird comments I've come out fairly unscathed.

9. Do you write smut?

oh god I rarely write anything that doesn't include smut

10. Do you write crossovers? What’s the craziest one you’ve written?

OH ok I wrote A View to Kill - a Hannibal/Blood and Chocolate/ James Bond-Casino Royal fic. It's probably one of my most intense fics, it has a little in there for everyone and no guessing needed... it's omegaverse

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

Not that I know of

12. Have you ever had a fic translated?

Yes one

13. Have you ever co-written a fic before?

I wrote a lot of my Hannibal fics with another person. it was really fun and a productive way to write. I think we also did a couple of marvel fics and a couple witcher fics together as well

14. What’s your all time favorite ship?

Oh nooooo I can't. I'm a multishipper through and through and I can't even decide on a favourite character.

15. What’s a WIP you want to finish, but doubt you ever will?

Hmm well all of them 😂 maybe Wrapped in your arms (witcher) and Jigsaw falling into Place (spn)

16. What are your writing strengths?

Being able to balance absolute filth with fluffy soft sweetness

17. What are your writing weaknesses?

writing short things. which I never thought would be my problem until the last couple of years. I can also take ages to update something because my muse wants to write all the oneshots in my brain.

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fic?

TBH I've never tried

19. First fandom you wrote for?

Supernatural

20. Favorite fic you’ve written?

I don't think I can answer that. I love them all, I re-read them all a lot.

tagging anyone who wants to play! Please tag me so I can see your stuff 💜

[whiskeysmulti]

@parallelroutes-ooc replied to your post “@parallelroutes-ooc replied to your post...”:

[ for me i enjoy canon divergence and the differences between muses in general, bc i hate subjecting myself to this and can't even imagine doing it to anyone else, it was just... when i first joined the fandom someone acted snooty about it and i later realized they were full-on fanon. i haven't recovered lmao. ]

​

.Whiskey. Yeah that happens too. I've run into people in the past who were full blown fanon or anime only and telling me I was really OOC and I had to tell them basically "read the manga and then tell me that."

I let others like what they like, I know my blog isn't everyone's cup of tea and I never would try to make it that. But my issue is when they come at me telling me my portrayal is incorrect when they're following fanon and the popular fanon actually contradicted the canon. You know I'm really chill and not about to be that guy that's like "Ah-ha told you it was wrong!" But it just really pisses me off when people try to site fanon sources and not the canon, to tell me what's wrong with my portrayal and why I'm too OOC. When I wasn't actually OOC it was just that the popular fanon interpretation was completely different to actual canon.

And I'm like you I love divergence and headcanons, but there's a HUGE difference in being divergent when you know the canon but don't agree with it compared to just rolling with popular fanon without even really looking into the possibility of it even working in canon or not.

And my issue is mainly with the ones who take fanon at face value and don't even research it and argue that "yeah this is actually canon, this is what happened." when it wasn't and it would only take reading like 3 chapters to realize that.

I'm all for divergence and headcanons but make it make some sense for the world it's set in and remember it's not actual canon, so don't try to push it like it is. That's where I disagree with a lot of stuff in fandom tags because sometimes people try to spread it as canon and it wasn't.

[mobolanz]

For the OC questions: 5, 24, 31 and 40!

Sweeeet!:D thank you for yet another ask oml <3 🤧

Let's see!(⁠ﾉ⁠◕⁠ヮ⁠◕⁠)⁠ﾉ⁠*⁠.⁠✧

5. If you could make only one of your OCs popular/known, who would it be?

Oh pretty much my semi-self insert & sailor moon oc Mia Hideno (Amethyst as a villain) 🤧 I mean it's also the one I have the biggest history with, and my 2nd most developed and thought out one after Evelyn(unless we speak lore/inspo wise where it's an equal footing) . Like imma be fr here I'm surprised that an anime/manga that named 90% and counting of its villains after minerals/gemstones there wasn't anyone in canon after that (like,,,it can be the sailor earth of villain ocs <3). Plus I'm very much set on how her story goes (with multiple endings.) So all I need is to resume my SM rewatch that was paused after aot pt.3 trailer was released and I'm on it! (⁠ﾉ⁠◕⁠ヮ⁠◕⁠)⁠ﾉ⁠*⁠.⁠✧

And like,,, her and demande,,, my og oc ship that's still kicking today 😆💎💐 what I clung on to until creating reinelyn :")

24. If you could meet one OC of yours, who would it be and why??

Ahhh right, I knew right away who would it be and that reminded me- I don't think I've introduced aya here yet have I?:3

Because shopping with her would be the dream tbh. Your wardrobe would feel like a blessing had struck it. Also she sweet 🤧🤧

31. Pick one OC of yours and explain what their tumblr blog would be like (what they reblog, layout, anything really)

Just one? :c I'm going with main trio for this one

Evelyn: mostly just pretty and cute aesthetic pictures and philosophical/ motivational quotes. She doesn't have that much free time on her hands so when she does it rather be in a positive territory that doesn't drain her further. Although should she befriend anyone also continuously support whatever they make by sharing it with commentary.

Mia: exclusive art account. A close resemblance to the one I have myself indeed (semi-self insert indeed xD). Should she have a personal one kinda like Evelyn's but also a lot of character meta/analysis posts reblogged. For certain a villain apologist 😆

Cecille: mostly short personal posts, doesn't bother with anything that isn't pfp and a snarky line for the blog title. probably gets anon hate claiming her attitude is ass so she replies with one 🥱 (as in "ain't reading all that") and leaves it. (I love her 🤧)

40. Any fond memories linked to your characters? Feel free to share!

Honestly nothing overly specific of an event considering I kept a lot about them to myself for a long time but,,, let's say these

For Mia just about how everytime I have a brainrot for her it's like the muse had struck me I had to keep a list if I burn out before doing them all so it can be pulled for next time 🤧💐

In Evelyn's case it's more recent knowing pretty much everyone I talk about her with is interested & likes her🥹. I mean that really gives me a chance to go and further ny writing skill and it's also nice to look in her tag and see old and new stuff

My pride and joy that's what she is ✨ :")

Some oc questions