#i knew garrus was recruitable but not which quest!!!

[grimwarden]

/Mass effect 2 spoilers

I just did the archangel..... the moment i saw those turian hips-

[meggannn]

i saw another "Garrus accepts Shepard in ME2 when they come back, why can't Ashley/Kaidan" post the other day and was gonna reply, then i realized my response was less about discussion and more about info-dumping/being right, so i decided to just make my own post. so here is the long explanation of why I don't and never will hold it against Kaidan/Ash for reacting as they did on Horizon just so I can point to it for later

I'm not gonna go too far into Garrus’s POV to Shepard's resurrection, just the VS's (Virmire Survivor's). I want to add crucial context for the VS's Horizon POV that is rarely mentioned in these sorts of comparisons, which is: TIM has been spreading rumors about Shepard being alive and with Cerberus that the VS is fully aware of by the time Shepard's boots hit Horizon. if you accept the comics as canon, then TIM's actually been seeding those rumors since before Shepard even woke up on the operating table. (see this panel in which one of TIM's Citadel operatives gets caught pre-ME2 trying to steal classified info about Shepard. TIM is pointedly not too bothered about it.) when you talk to Anderson and the Council at the Citadel, they both already know you're with Cerberus. how? you certainly didn't tell them. it was TIM, and he confirms this himself as well after Horizon. (Joker also says "[Horizon] was probably a set-up" if you talk to him after the mission.)

so the VS hears these rumors pre-Horizon. Kaidan says he asked about Shepard, and Anderson stonewalled him. by the time they're posted on Horizon, Kaidan/Ash have been hearing "Shepard's with Cerberus" for weeks, possibly months. if you’re the VS, you probably don’t want to believe someone you trusted to lead you into hell, maybe even trusted enough to break fraternization regulations with, would 1) lie to you about being dead, and 2) work with a terrorist organization. but then they get there and find out not only are they fucking alive and didn't contact you (not knowing they COULDN'T contact you because THEY were also stonewalled by Anderson); not only that, they're now trying to recruit you to said terrorist organization. they’d be questioning everything they thought they knew about their old CO.

the VS meeting Shep on Horizon after Shep saves the colony is not a "holy shit, you're alive!" moment like it was for Garrus's rescue. it's a "fuck, you're alive, and you have a Cerberus crew with you just like I hoped you wouldn't" moment. a "the rumors were true, I just didn't want to believe them because that means you're either a traitor or compromised" moment.

imagine after Anderson dies at the end of ME3, he suddenly shows up in ME5 going “Hey Shepard I’m back, also come join my team in my mysterious quest, let’s talk it out together in this private room over here and you’ll see my reasoning.” do you think I’m an idiot, Leviathan? we-as-Shepard saw Anderson die ourselves—like the VS was on the SR-1 when it crashed. the player would be 100% in the right to think the real Anderson was dead and this was a mangled copy of his corpse the Leviathan or some new fucking thing was puppeting from afar.

for Garrus, who was just told "Shepard's dead" after the fact but didn't see the crash, Shepard being alive is an unexpected miracle he doesn't want to think twice about. (Garrus was drowning on Omega, but Shepard arose from the dead just to save his life; Shepard knows what to do; Shepard can save him from his fuck-ups. Garrus is finally free from the burden of being a poor leader and can fall back on following someone else; everything is right again in his world if Shepard's at the helm.)

but for the VS, some small part of them may even be hoping the rumors aren't true, that Shepard's NOT alive, because if they are, it means Shep lied to them, or isn't who they thought they were.

then, for the VS to be told on Horizon “you’re overreacting, of course working with Cerberus is the only logical conclusion here!” honestly? sounds like radicalization.

“I was dead for two years!” = of course you were, that was Cerberus brainwashing time, baby. Shepard, how do you really know what happened those two years? was it really just "reconstruction"? maybe the real Shepard IS dead. (especially after the Citadel DLC confirms Cerberus did make a Shepard clone, we know the VS actually has a point.)

“fine, but then why doesn’t Shepard just explain stuff better?” this is less into characterization (because Shep is a player character and people can headcanon their Shep's rhetorical skills differently) and imo gets more into what the narrative is telling us. I see this criticism of Bioware's writing on Horizon (and I can't believe I'm defending Bioware writing) but I personally like that the player isn’t given decent, successful counterarguments in this situation. because let’s face it, the VS’s concerns are valid, and nothing Shepard can say or do on Horizon really can placate any of them. sometimes you just get outplayed; sometimes fights or arguments are just unwinnable even when people are trying their best.

would a persuasion check have helped? maybe, but that's not the point. it goes against our RPG brain where we're often wired to think every path is open to us with the right attitude or enough red/blue points. the Horizon reunion is two hurt people who are upset at each other, not realizing/acknowledging they've been put in an inconsolable scenario. they're both victims of stonewalling, one by Anderson and another by TIM. the Horizon convo was never going to be a “victory: squadmate acquired” scene because the deck was stacked against Shepard + the VS before they both even set foot on the colony. Shepard never got a chance to control their return narrative: Cerberus controls their team, their ship, who knows what, who they recruit, and when. TIM also knew that the VS was stationed on Horizon, as he confirms in the post-mission talk. the VS reunion was always going to be a car crash. and that works out great for TIM—Shepard is cut off from former Alliance allies, painting Cerberus as their only path forward to beating the Collectors.

but even if, for RPG purposes, Shepard had been able to reach out to the VS first… it’s still completely valid of them to question the situation lol. Liara had a hand in it so she ofc she wasn’t surprised at the return; Wrex adopts a typical krogan attitude of “you’re not dead? well that’s weird, but I’m a thousand years old, I’ve seen weirder.” there’s a reason Garrus accepts Shepard returning so readily and Tali/Ash/Kaidan take time: they’ve got healthier coping mechanisms and better support systems. Garrus cut himself off from his friends and family and is living out a Spectre fantasy on Omega. they others have moved on; Garrus hasn’t. he’s desperate for Shepard to come back, and why wouldn’t he be? Shepard was there when he felt like a hero for the first time in his life. if Shepard's back, he can be a hero again. but for the VS, Shepard returning means something is awfully, awfully wrong.

[joh-gaming]

Watch Dogs 2 Critical Review

I don’t post many reviews of games here, mostly ‘cause you can find reviews everywhere and in any format. So why make one for Watch Dogs 2? Because they went the extra mile and they deserve more than what they got.

After the failure of the first game, it’s understandable why the sequel sold so poorly. Not even counting the amount of solid games that came out around the same time, but people have been burned by Ubisoft’s marketing far too many times. Take The Division, which I actually like and play, the downgrade wasn’t just in graphics but gameplay. It was far more interesting in the original trailer than what we ended up with. The Division is fun but also boring, and to a point you can say the same about Assassin’s Creed Syndicate (another game I like). Syndicate however has the benefit of having the twins, Evie and Jacob Frye are really fun characters and the Assassin’s Creed formula has its moments. But one thing was clear, Ubisoft was making cookie cutter missions in their open world games and that gets boring fast.

Finally they made a game that breaks away from the GTA clone Fed Ex formula (mostly anyway) and people weren’t buying it. Gaming sites were more concerned about getting hits, so while most of them praised the game, it was mostly as “it’s better than the first” which we all knew would be ‘cause that one was terrible. So why did I ignore the game? Well, to be honest it was Marcus. Don’t get me wrong, even without playing it I prefer Marcus over Aiden any day, but the promo videos kept showing Marcus as this dull character, and his clothes are something I wouldn’t wear even if I was cosplaying. I knew you could change clothes but have you seen the outfits they chose for the promo? he looks like a clown most of the time.

What I’m saying is, I couldn’t find myself in Marcus. Thankfully, they decided to offer that 3 hrs trial which I took. Played the hell out of the game to get a feel for the clothes, missions, characters and story. So I’m going to start my review with that, click keep reading if you’re interested.

The 3hrs Trial

OK so the first mission was kind of hard, but it was fun. Talk about a tutorial in the middle of a war zone and with a timer no less. (trial timer, not mission timer) I had to learn fast to make the most out of it. The script is... well have you seen TV shows lately? yea not great but not as bad as some people make it out to be. The gameplay was solid, animations were pretty good and graphics are impressive. I was unimpressed with the characters, even Sitara which I liked from the promo material. I did a couple of main missions, stole the Cyber Driver car, played some co-op missions and 1 of the events, opted out of PvP ‘cause I’m not interested in that. I don’t go to the Dark Zone in The Division either so yea, PvP is not my thing. I did a lot of the ATM side quests which are quite fun and funny. By the end of the trial I knew I really wanted this game. It was already on my list, but I was going to buy it as cheap as possible. I talked to my friends (the ones that played the trial with me) and we all liked it, they bought the game before I did but we all got it. Not only that but we bought the Gold Edition, which is still on sale at the time of this post.

Gold Edition

Why the Gold edition? Well, it comes with the Season Pass and it was $60 for the whole thing. So technically, it was finally priced right, the whole game for the price of a full game, I’m OK with that. It’s probably the only way I would recommend the season pass of any game.

Characters

Like I said before, during the 3hr trial I wasn’t impressed, but they slowly grew on me and I prefer that. In Life is Strange it was the same, I didn’t like Chloe until the third episode.

Marcus

Look at those clothes... wtf is that? He looks like TV static or something. Anyway, took a while but the guy grew on me thanks to moments like this one

Wish he had had more to do outside of doing the impossible. Also wish he had more interaction with Horatio.

Sitara

She’s cool, the Sombra of the group (a lot more serious though) and more of an artist than a hacker, even though she’s brilliant. She knows the power of a brand and works hard to turn Dedsec into “celebrities”. Just don’t wear a man bun in front of her.

Wrench

Cynical, sarcastic, weird af and with a short temper. This is Marcus’ best friend in the crew. Throws tantrums every now and then, I can relate to this guy a lot more, except for the thongs... yea... can’t relate to that.

Josh

The walking super computer, he is a bit stereotypical as well as cartoonish but I still like this guy a lot. There’s a lot of potential with this character.

Horatio

And Horatio, you barely get to talk to this guy and that’s a real shame. The few moments he had with Marcus were great. With the amazing animations and expressions, their funny scenes were actually funny.

I’m pretty sure this is the first time Ubisoft went with this approach on the characters. We’ve seen games where the companions are just as important as the main character, games like Mass Effect, Dragon Age, Fallout 4 and of course the Saints Row series. I can say this was just a few interactions short of being as good as Saints Row’s. I applaud Ubisoft for this and hope they keep evolving this part of their story telling, with gameplay to support it.

Gameplay

This game has variety, to the point where I haven’t tried everything it offers yet. Sure some of it is mundane, but I do love to have some mundane stuff in my open world games. As long as I don’t get a call from a cousin every 5 steps asking to go bowling. Still, the mundane stuff gives you an excuse to explore the beautifully crafted map. Same with the collectibles which help you unlock some skills later in the game.

They also added events, now since I locked my game as a single player experience (except when I join my friends in co-op) I’m not sure if the events are part of the co-op experience or if you have to open your game. You can choose to open it so that only friendly players show up in your session, however that doesn’t mean they won’t troll you, there are a lot of asses out there. But that’s another positive, the ability to lock the game as a single player experience or open its multiplayer options in ways that work for you. In any case I had a lot of fun with these events when playing with my friends. Especially one that has low tolerance for stealth (it was kind of hilarious as I was marking enemies and studying the locations, then suddenly he was blowing people up with traps)

I do recommend that if you don’t want to participate in PvP, that you turn off Bounty Hunter and Invasion but leave the friendly options open. Why? because even though there’s a chance trolls might find a way to hinder you, you also miss out on unscripted events that can only happen when some crazy dude has the cops or gangs on his tail. You can help them out or troll them yourself if that’s your kink.

One last thing, I know I’m keeping the gameplay details very vague but I prefer if you found out everything you can do in the game on your own, the drone and remote car are fantastic mechanics. I love it when a game introduces a mechanic that suddenly every game after it should build upon. Not unlike the Last of Us with their bow and on the fly crafting which was arguably improved by the competition in the Tomb Raider games.

Missed Opportunities

The game is VERY good as is, so if you can afford it, go ahead and buy it ‘cause unless you hate Open World Games, you should like this game a lot. Remember, there’s a 3hr free trial if you’re still unsure, it’s not a demo, it’s the full game and you have access to it for 3 hrs.

That being said, a few things could have turned this game from very good to great (at least in my opinion)

1- No way to donate money

A- can’t tip performers on the streets B- can’t give money to beggars C- can’t even donate to bank accounts of people you know have some kind of illness or problem

Sounds pointless, but if you do it often enough in a game, the reason why you did it may carry over to the real world. A pebble in a pond or whatever but I think it can work.

2- Chatting NPCs

A- it’s only used to deliver low level context B- should have an “affection” rating tied to it, even if the reward is some spray or clothing item C- can’t use intel from NPCs (unless scripted) to prepare better for a mission

You can talk to your crew and get their thoughts after every mission, but that’s ultimately pointless. I understand they didn’t want to lock people out of content, nor wanted to force people into something they didn’t want to do but hey, I didn’t talk to Garrus every single time after a mission and he still became one of my favorite characters of all time. Same with Liara and Tali.

3- Tone

A- too serious at times B- it should have been more about their branding, at least most of the game (it kind of is but they already have the main game’s goal from the start) C- after a particular story event, some missions should be locked for a substantial amount of in game time

Saints Row games know they are a parody and work with it. Yes they shift tone in a way. From being funny and satirical to Ling, Carlos, Gat and even you dying, but it still felt within the themes of the game. In Watchdogs 2 you can have a gang after you, then you’re joking about some stupid shit. It shifts too abruptly sometimes. It’s not annoying just something that could be ironed out in the future.

4- HQ Hackerspace

A- you have your main hideout in a game store and you didn’t Gwent it? B- no hideout customization C- Marcus can’t recruit for Dedsec

Seriously, why didn’t you make a game within a game? You could have made a table top game and go all Gwent with it. And not being able to customize at least one of the hideouts is kind of a first in a Ubisoft game. Also, for story purposes I wish that Marcus had his own recruits. This could have been a game of its own where you could recruit the wrong person and then having to deal with that. Of course this wouldn’t be scripted, the NPCs are out there, (I call them trigger NPCs) if you recruit those that are under cover or from P8 or whatever, then that’s on you.

5- Social Locations

A- no interesting NPCs in most of them B- they serve no purpose other than one interaction and as a fast travel point

Something could have been done with these, especially if tied to the whole Marcus being able to recruit for Dedsec thing. A little initiation or test could have been done here.

6- Canon vs Player Actions

A- Marcus can kill a lot of people if the player wants B- at one point in the story Marcus does kill some people but gets no reaction from the crew

This is the same problem I have with the new Tomb Raider games, killing is not a big deal for these characters. It should be, like I said with the change in tone. They are hackers kind of having fun exposing the big corporations and the corrupt. They like to feel like super heroes but then the game is designed to have lethal weapons that the player can use, which is fine, that’s a gamified action which doesn’t have to be canon. But when it does happen in the story I expect more, taking a life shouldn’t be as uneventful as changing clothes

7- Clothes

A- nobody cares what you wear once you buy pants B- changing your outfit doesn’t affect in any way the follower multiplier

When you start the game, right after your initiation, your first mission is to buy pants. People react to what you were wearing before, taking pictures and laughing at you. But that’s where it ends. Also when you buy your first set of clothes, your follower number (XP) rises, would be nice if it had some kind of multiplier tied to it. The only game I remember that went through with that was GTA San Andreas.

Disclaimer

No, I’m not a Ubisoft fanboy, in fact they piss me off sometimes. I signed up for The Division’s beta almost as soon as registrations were allowed but didn’t get a code. Which sure, I can see that you have a limited number of codes to give, but when it happens that you gave away codes to people that didn’t register, that’s when I get annoyed. I had to preorder the game to get in, I honestly was considering skipping the game entirely.

Thank you Ubisoft Montreal

On the chance that someone from Ubisoft is reading this, I want to thank everyone that worked on this game. It was a lot of fun and looking forward to more of it.

[omegastation]

So yesterday I thought I would have recruited Liara by now but I still haven't done Feros and Noveria. *facepalm* I just went and did all the quests in the Citadel, which took me an hour and a half, until finally I was named a Spectre. I really loved that scene, because you're discussing really secret galaxy stuff and then suddenly everyone shows up to see you become a Top Council Agent. It's really funny. Then after that there's the whole conversation with Anderson which is incredibly wtf with the tone you can take. I mean no matter the path you take in the dialogues, it goes from "Are you okay? It's not your fault Sir" to "I THINK YOU OWE ME THE TRUTH. NO MORE LIES." And when Anderson explains everything, it goes from "What happened to you wasn't fair" to "HOW COME YOU DIDN'T DEFEND YOURSELF BETTER?!" Shepard, what the fuck?

And there are some quests in ME1 that really shows Paragon can be "the right thing to do RIGHT NOW" but some Paragon decisions don't think past the moment now and the consequences it will have in the future. I already knew this, but somehow not in such a clear way. It's very interesting. So that’s one idea for a meta post. 

I have ideas for two other meta posts: one about the characters and their relationship to authority, another about Garrus.  He is so eager to leave C-SEC! Finally, no more rules! And my Shep is like : "you will do as I say, we will do things right!" and he's just "I-- yes Commander." :D

Anyone else doing a complete playthrough of the trilogy before MEA?

[meggannn]

i'm interested in hearing your thoughts on garrus being shoe-horned into the best friend role if you want to talk about it!

I may not be able to talk about it as much as some people who are super Garrus-critical, but yes I can try!

this really becomes a problem in ME3 more than the other games. basically my understanding of Garrus’s writing in ME3 is that they were well aware that of the fact that he was a fan-favorite, and didn’t want to threaten that, so they made it his crux. they took most of the fandom’s feelings for Garrus and decided to reflect that in Shepard’s relationship with Garrus, but by doing this, they basically ended up pretending a relationship had been there throughout ME1-2 that existed in some player’s heads. of course, Mass Effect is an RPG (well, sort of) so in theory... your best friend could be whoever you want to be, so with that in mind, it’s a little strange for a dev team to go “your best friend is this one character and we will write all of his scenes around that assumption.” unless they really want to play up the fanservice, I guess.

when he’s introduced in ME1, people joke about how they would never not recruit him, but it is a possibility—you could run through the entire game having only met Garrus in the Citadel Tower and never spoken to him again—in which case by meeting him again in ME2, it is a little strange to see that guy you barely remember from the Citadel in the last game show up, but not entirely unwelcome, because at least you, like, recognize him. it’s a little odd how you banter like old friends by making fun of his scars, but what is straight-up bizarre is how in the next game, ME3, Garrus talks about how he was there with you fighting Reapers from the beginning. of course, not a lot of people would specifically go out of their way to avoid recruiting Garrus in ME1, and very few people probably naturally avoided him standing by the elevator in ME1 (which is the only way to not recruit him if you don’t find him in Dr. Michele’s clinic), so the odds of someone not recruiting him in ME1 are low unless they intended to, but it’s still possible.

come ME2, I think they chose to forget that. a few lines have changed in 2 if you don’t recruit him in 1, but not many. remember in ME1, Garrus was an optional squaddie, who had an optional side quest, and his relationship with Shepard there was very much superior/subordinate, or as some people interpret it, more mentor-like. the most personal they get is when they talk about their jobs, the difficulties they face making moral choices, a bit about their families, and Spectrehood. it’s a nice introduction to Garrus’s character but the lines are drawn pretty clear between their roles; by the end of ME1, given the canon dialogue, the closest I’m personally willing to believe of their relationship from helping him deal with Saleon is “subordinate I am fond of,” or post-Saren after Garrus leaves the Normandy, “ally I can call on later.”

and then Shepard dies and is gone for two years. by ME2, when you meet up with him again, I actually find this jump from “subordinate” to “ally/friend” works for my Shepard, but it might not for people who never really engaged with Garrus or even liked him on the SR-1, or those who weren’t thrilled with the idea of him... basically running off to kill as many people as he could on Omega after Shepard got themselves spaced. if you don’t romance him in ME2, he has so little content in ME2: his recruitment mission, post-recruitment convo, loyalty convo trigger, loyalty quest, and post-loyalty convo. if you romance him, you get several more scenes, but compared to other romanceable companions like Miranda or Jack—whose attitudes toward you change the more you talk to them—or even Samara, who you can just chat with while looking out at the stars, Garrus’s platonic relationship with Shepard seems to stall after the Sidonis quest: you gain his loyalty for the suicide mission and then you’re assumed to be all cool. realistically, they could’ve given us a lot of reasons why Garrus might not want to talk—he’s probably still reeling from getting his face blown off and confronting his betrayer again, or if you don’t let him kill Sidonis, maybe he could’ve gotten pissed at Shepard and confronted them—but that’s me trying to justify a lack of content. truthfully there’s very little non-romanceable Garrus content in ME2 to build up that “best friends” angle they want to sell in ME3.

in ME3, you DO get more content that shows how naturally “at ease” he feels working with Shepard: his recruitment mission, longer conversation trees when he joins, more banter from squaddies—including Garrus—on missions, him inviting you to go bottle-shooting, a scene with him after every main mission where he asks you how you’re doing, if you miss Ash/Kaidan, mutual struggles over the burden of leadership, worrying over his family, etc. by this point though, if you didn’t romance him, he’s treating you like his best friend even though he basically ignored you all of ME2. again, you could rationalize that time as his social awkwardness on a Cerberus ship, or him dealing with trauma, but in my friend’s words, it’s really more of bioware telling-but-not-showing that they really wanted you to like this guy but waiting until the last game to give him consistent scenes with the player that reflected that closeness.

on paper, Garrus makes a lot of sense to be close to Shepard, because assuming you recruit him in ME1, he’s been fighting Reapers with Shepard in every game, but also... so has Joker or Chakwas or Tali, for the same reason; so does Ash or Kaidan, for being the only Alliance teammate who was there at the beginning and end (assuming they didn’t both die); so does Liara, for being there every game and only abstaining in ME2 because she was still dealing with the fallout of saving your life (there’s lots of criticism of her being “forced” on the player too and while I agree with some of it, that’s a topic for another time lol). Bioware does introduce Garrus early in each game—I don’t know if this was intentional, because they knew he was so popular so they wanted to give him to the player early—but then he has so little to say in ME2, the game about building relationships, that introducing him early just means he stands around for half game talking about calibrations. a lot of fandom, especially shakarian fans, end up filling the gaps of ME2 with their own headcanons, myself included, to make the relationship development feel a little smoother, but the trouble there is when we start treating it like it was always canon for everybody.

I know it seems weird to complain that such a popular character should’ve had even more content—there are lots of other characters just as or more deserving who got really screwed over (coughs Ashley)—but in my ideal world, they all would’ve had more content lmfao.

[meggannn]

i just finished the turian ark quest again and sorry here’s a sad shakarian andromeda au

shepard left the milky way after either being dishonorably discharged or choosing to depart out of guilt or atonement for her actions at torfan. alec ryder recruited her as a fellow n7 after he is discharged for his illegal ai research, and though shepard isn’t entirely sold on the initiative, she has nothing left for her in the milky way and alec makes the case that with her talents she might do more good in andromeda, so she accepts his offer of becoming second in command.

shepard is hastily made pathfinder after the entire ryder family is killed when the hyperion collides with the scourge. younger than alec but not inexperienced, she leads harper and kosta, along with a skeleton crew of specialized combatants she vets personally including a young asari archaeologist who wants to open the first andromeda university and an old grizzled krogan vet who’s tired of watching his people kill themselves in the milky way (cough), and travels across the galaxy to eliminate the kett and eventually make tentative peace with the angara. it’s not ideal, she misses the her old life so much it hurts, but she’s doing what she can.

and then an sos pinging as a private natanus comm signal reaches the tempest

she follows it to, oddly, havarl, where a former c-sec officer garrus vakarian is leading a ragtag group of turian fighters, also awakened from pods, against the roekaar. they’ve been out here for weeks, vakarian explains, and his dad, castis, is the turian pathfinder. despite orders, before entering cryosleep garrus installed personal trackers in his and his sister’s suits in case of emergency if they were separated on landing – which is exactly what happened. but we don’t have a ship and we’ve being tracked on foot by unknown hostiles for weeks, we’re running out of dextro supplies and oh spirits someone finally showed up. you’re the human pathfinder? the human ark landed? well if you’re willing to help i’m not gonna complain. got any spare clips?

after rescuing what remains of the group from the roekaar (during which garrus may or may not suffer a serious injury and nearly be killed…… um) they track garrus’s faint signal to what was once called habitat-5, but now appears to be a debris field after being pulverized with the scourge. the natanus readings are everywhere across this system: with garrus’s tracker they rescue dozens of pods, but find hundreds more floating and lifeless, thousands still unaccounted for. most concerning, the ark itself is still missing. with the destruction of habitat-5, the initiative has no locatable world capable of supporting dextro life, and the more pods they recover, the less space and resources there are on the nexus for the awakening turians and soon-to-be-arriving quarians. efforts are made to relocate as many turians as they can to colonies, but the majority of those recovered are weak from their time afloat in space and need the medical expertise and support of the resources on the nexus to fully heal, further draining resources on the already straining station.

vakarian is better at hiding it than most, but shepard is well aware how to read anxiety in all species of soldiers. his focus is fixed on discovering what remains of the turian ark, and with it, his family, but they both know finding his father and sister will be useless if turians have nowhere to live when they’re rescued.

then one day, a salarian team discovers a pod labeled ‘vakarian, solana’ floating adrift in slow orbit over a gaseous moon. it’s been powerless for months.

shepard finds him in the drive core, fooling with something on the console. she knows busywork when she sees it.

“here.” she hands him a bottle of palaveni horosk that nyx had managed to scrounge up last month and handed to her with a meaningful look that morning. “i was saving it for when we found natanus and rescued everyone inside and became big damn heroes. but i think you deserve it. you can keep it to yourself if you like, i won’t tell anyone.”

vakarian stares at the bottle she’s placed in his palm for several long, unblinking moments, then sighs and tosses it back, draining half of it in one long swig. he caps what remains and places it on the edge of the console, away from any sensitive tech that might get unhappy when wet.

“my dad’s still out there,” he says hoarsely. he’s staring at the bottle and the six-hundred-year-old brand label, probably out of business by now back home, distilleries left to waste and the name all but forgotten in obscure academic records. “i know the odds. i don’t need anyone to tell me what we’ll probably find out there. and yet – i just found my sister’s corpse in a frozen glass pod, the last words she said to me were ‘they’ll wake me up first so i can say i’m older than you in this galaxy, too.’ now have to plan her funeral on – on a negative budget with no place to bury her. and part of me still has the audacity to hope, about my dad. and it’s the worst thing i’ve done to myself. but i can’t stop.”

shepard doesn’t know how to tell him she well understands without crossing emotional boundaries that might be… inappropriate, to a race such as the turians. “you haven’t heard anything else from him on the private link you installed?”

vakarian shakes his head once.

“you will,” she says.

“shepard,” he says.

“if he’s anything like you,” she says, “you will.”

he laughs briefly, without humor.

“even if he’s still alive, where are we going to put fifteen thousand colonists?” he still isn’t looking at her. “we have no planet for dextro life, commander. the only one was blasted into debris by that – fucking dark cloud, whatever the hell it is. i woke up and survived off rations from my pod and found other survivors and kept them alive as long as i could, and they only followed because they believed me when i said the nexus would have a plan, and things would get better. but we were hunted in the dark one by one by foreign snipers, and when we found civilization – found you, we found the nexus was just as desperate for dextro resources as we were. no help’s coming. we’re on our own.”

shepard grips the edge of his carapace gently, and turns him toward her.

“you’re a part of this crew, vakarian,” she tells him, “and you will have what you need when you’re under my command. that includes weapons and mods so that you can kill as many kett as you want. that includes dextro supplies and rations, so that you have enough strength to tear the galaxy apart until you find your family. and it includes someone to talk to, so that even if you think you don’t need it, you know it’s there if you do.” she lets go of his collar and eases a step away. “and if you’re going to stay, you’re free to call me shepard. god knows the rest of this ship did without invitation.”

he blinks, slowly. “commander – ”

“shepard.”

“ma’am,” he says slightly mollified, and she decides not to push it today. “your ship is the top of her class. i’d be honored continue working on her. but i knew when you took me on this was a temporary assignment. you agreed to help me only so far as we reached the natanus, and it’s… clear that’s not happening any time soon. it would be a strain on your – i should be reassigned on the nexus given the circumstances.”

“the tempest has priority clearance to equip its med bay and galley with whatever dextro supplies my team requires,” shepard continues as though he has said nothing. “we already have one turian in the cargo bay. she knows how to share. quite frankly, i’m sure the nexus won’t mind if we take another off their hands and put him to productive work on the initiative’s most advanced starship.”

he stares at her for another long moment. turians have such steady, piercing blue eyes, she thinks – against hard plated faces and their metallic exterior, especially one with a hawke-like sniper’s patience such as garrus, sometimes their eyes are the only part of them that seem vibrantly alive.

“my father,” he starts again, then stops. his brow shifts just the slightest, tensing; he can’t seem to bring himself to continue.

“we’ll find him,” shepard says again. “i can’t promise that the answers will be what you want. but we will.”

vakarian seems to believe that, at least. he draws up to full height, exhales, and then grasps her palm. “then thank you, comma – shepard.” he tilts his head slightly, as though he’s considering her. “you know, when you say it, i almost believe it.”

“i’ve been told i have that effect on people.” she waves with a finger to the forgotten bottle on the console. “you going to finish that?”

“yes,” he says, and makes no move to do so. his mandibles flare in what she recognizes as a turian version of a smile. “but then please call me garrus. it might make things easier to get into the habit before we meet up with my father. being called ‘big vakarian’ and ‘little vakarian’ was only amusing for so long back in c-sec.”

fair enough. “i imagine you must take after him too, then.”

“you shouldn’t have trouble telling us apart, ma’am,” garrus vakarian says, and in a single motion reaches back a hand to grasp the bottle and point the tip toward her, an offer. his mandibles are still flared, eyes warm. if she didn’t know any better, she might call it – cheeky. “i’m the good looking one.”