#i keep forgetting to use my writing tag sksjsj

[fabulouspotatosister]

truth hurts

summary: there are just some things you can’t hide. truth serum does that to you.

word count: 3,452

warnings: minor injury, mentions of blood

gif credit: @lowercasev

a/n(1): hello everyone! i hope you're all having a splendid day, wherever and whenever you are. this is just another one of those "i had a random idea and i wanted to get it out" except the idea is super old and i just wrote it now because i love procrastinating. anyway, i hope you enjoy this fic!

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I suppose this is what I get for not listening to the Doctor.

 The wound on your ankle was looking, for lack of a better word, bad. While you weren’t a medical professional, there were a few things you were sure of - small cuts shouldn’t bleed so much, small cuts shouldn’t hurt so much, and small cuts shouldn’t be purple.

 You hadn’t meant to wander off. Amy was with the Doctor, talking with the locals of the planet that you had landed on, which left you to watch the TARDIS. As if the TARDIS needed watching, you had thought then. You’d taken a small walk - just a little deeper into the forest you were in, looking at all the strange flowers and trees.

 There weren’t many rules when it came to travelling with the Doctor. Not wandering off was one of them. And no interfering, but was that really a rule? You were a repeat offender, of course - how did the Doctor expect you to just stay still while there were so many extraordinary things to explore? 

 The forest was beautiful. You spent a lot of your small walk looking up at the canopy of trees that let in just enough light to make all the foliage glitter and glow. You were distracted, not really looking at where you were going, and you’d missed the feeling of something scratching against your ankle as you walked. 

 “I guess this is my karma,” you muttered, leaning against the TARDIS. You’d hobbled back when the pain became too much. The wound was pulsing now, beating in time to your heartbeat, a steady trickle of blood finding its way into your shoe. “I’ll listen next time.”

 A sharp call of your name made you look up - the Doctor was there in the distance, smiling so wide it had to hurt. “Come on!” he called, and waved. 

 “Is it safe?” you called back. 

 The Doctor nodded and motioned for you to come over, bouncing up and down like an excited kid. He could be unbearably cute sometimes. (Wait, where did that thought come from?) “It’s fine! Totally safe! Amy’s distracted in the market, I think we should go get her.”

 You looked at the Doctor, then at your ankle, and back to the Doctor. His smile was so earnest, so adorable. Your ankle would probably put a damper on everything, and the Doctor being upset was never a good sight. You were supposed to be having fun. You weren’t going to ruin everything by just having a scratch.

 “Hang on a minute!” You bent down, hidden by some of the shrubs, and rolled down your pant leg. Your wound stung as the fabric brushed against it, and you winced. You stood up, straightened yourself, and gave the Doctor your best “I’m-totally-fine” smile. “Okay, I’m good to go.”

 Your smile must have convinced him, because the Doctor grinned and spun around, disappearing back into the forest. 

 You tried not to limp as you followed him, but every step sent a stab of pain through your entire foot. Just grin and bear it, you thought, taking in a shuddering breath. Do it for him. 

 You pushed through the trees, finding yourself in a little clearing. The whole place felt alive - the trees glowed a warm orange as they swayed in the breeze, and the sound of their leaves rustling together sounded like delicate wind-chimes. Scattered around the clearing were various stalls and booths that were decorated with spools of vibrant cloth. The sounds of lively music and distant chatter filled the air as aliens of all kinds milled about.

 The Doctor was waiting for you, leaning against a wooden pole that held up a string of twinkling lights. Underneath those lights, with his arms crossed like that, he looked quite… quite… 

 You frowned and something throbbed in the back of your head. 

 “Ah! There you are,” the Doctor said brightly. He stepped away from the pole, still smiling widely with that smile of his, and wrapped his arm around your shoulders. Don’t look down, you begged silently. Just ignore me. “Brilliant, isn’t it? One of the legendary Elremian marketplaces. Just huge melting pots of culture, and the best place to find rare collectibles - hey -”

 The Doctor called your name, his voice soft against the din, and you let out a breath you didn’t know you were holding. Your head snapped up to meet his eyes. Your heart stuttered in your chest at his gaze, his gorgeous green eyes sparkling with worry. (What in the world...)

 “Are you okay?” he asked. He leaned down slightly to peer into your eyes, and you found that you didn’t want to pull away from how close he was. 

 You swallowed. Then, you nodded, and the throbbing in the back of your head turned into a pounding. “Of course,” you said, trying another “I’m-totally-fine” smile. “Let’s find Amy, yeah?”

 That smile wasn’t quite as convincing. The Doctor frowned as he stood back up, his gaze lingering on you for just a second longer before he wrapped his arm around your shoulders again and led you through the crowds.

 “As I was saying - collectibles,” the Doctor continued. Everything passed by you in a blur of vague colors and shapes. The Doctor’s voice was the only thing you could really focus on. “They’ve got everything from jewels to recalled video games, even stuff from archaeological finds if you can barter. Great, yeah?”

 “Yeah,” you muttered. The beautiful lights of the marketplace were so bright now, even though the rest of the sky was already turning dark. “It’s just - it’s loud.”

 “Loud? Don’t worry about that,” the Doctor said, and you caught a faint hint of concern in his voice. “Amy’s not far now. In here.”

 The Doctor pushed back the curtain of a small tent, gently pushing you inside. It was a little better than outside, a little darker and a little cooler. There were candles scattered around the floor, which had to be a fire hazard in a cloth tent, but no one in the tent seemed alarmed.

 “Amy!” the Doctor called, “How’s the shopping?”

 Amy emerged from behind another curtain. She was in a new dress, a tight-fitting neon green piece with a cape that fell over her shoulders and to the floor. It trailed behind her as she walked up to you. “Good! Here’s one,” she said, then spun around and raised her eyebrows. “How do I look?”

 “Bit bright,” the Doctor said, and Amy glared. “Sorry! Sorry. Good. I mean you look good.”

 The Doctor was right. It looked good on Amy, and honestly Amy could make anything look good, but the green was just so bright and annoying against the gentle tapestries of the tent and - “I don’t like it,” you blurted.

 Amy’s eyebrows had practically disappeared into her hair, but she was smiling. “Oh? Well, you’re honest today.”

 “No, no! I mean -” The pounding in your head had started to feel like someone hammering at your brain, chipping away parts that you actually needed. You winced at the pain, and your ankle began to sting again. “No, I think it looks great, I think you look great, you always look great -”

 “Don’t lie,” the Doctor said, moving to stand in front of you. 

 “I’m not lying,” you ground out. The Doctor’s brows furrowed.

 “Are you in pain?”

 “Yeah,” you answered - but if you were hurt they would be so upset and then you’d ruin everything - “Uh, no. I’m fine -!”

 At “fine”, you buckled, your knees giving out beneath you - Amy rushed forward and caught you, gently lowering you into a sitting position on the floor of the tent. 

 “What were you saying about fine?” Amy asked, her hands on your shoulders keeping you steady. “Doctor, what’s wrong with her?”

 “Nothing’s wrong with me,” you ground out, even though your legs felt like jelly and your brain felt like cotton. A sharp pain pierced through your head and you squeezed your eyes shut. “I’ll just - I’ll get up, let me -”

 “No, seriously, don’t lie,” the Doctor said, and rushed to your side. He crouched down beside you, taking your face into his hands, his skin warm against yours. His face was so close to your again, and you could see every single detail, down to the way his lip trembled slightly. He’d always been pretty, but now, looking over you with concern, he was even prettier. How was that possible?

 The words were out of your mouth before you could stop yourself. “Has anyone ever told you that you’re really pretty?”

 The Doctor’s eyes widened. “More than once,” he said, then mumbled something under his breath. “Is that the truth?”

 “Yeah, a hundred percent,” you said slowly, a smile spreading across your face. Shut up, shut up now before you ruin everything! “Super attractive. One might even say hot.”

 “Hot?” the Doctor mouthed in Amy’s direction before he looked back at you. Amy made a face that said not my words. “Right, you told the truth, do you feel better?”

 You let out a breath through your mouth. The cotton was coming out of your ears. That was funny. “Yup.”

 Suddenly, Amy gasped. “Oh my God, Doctor,” she said, her voice tight with fear. She looked up at the Doctor, fear filling her eyes, and reached out to slowly pull up your pant leg. You hissed as warm air met your wound again. “She’s bleeding!”

 Amy cringed and looked away, which meant that your wound was probably looking much worse than before.

 “No,” the Doctor said, breathless. “How long ago was this?”

 Your “I’m-totally-fine” smile was definitely not going to work now. “Just after you left me at the TARDIS, I think. Uh - I wandered off -” The Doctor’s eyebrows pinched, and something welled up in your chest, threatened to spill over. “And I’m sorry, I’m really sorry, please don’t be mad, but I wandered off and I cut myself on something and now I can’t stop talking -”

 “I’m not mad, sweetheart, you’re hurt,” the Doctor said, his voice gentle. “Amy, move her a bit, I’m going to have to take a look.”

 “Sweetheart? That’s nice, can you call me that more often?” Externally, you were smiling like an entire idiot, but internally you were slapping yourself in the face. “I really like it.”

 The Doctor went still for a moment, lips parted in surprise. He glanced at you and smiled, his cheeks a little flushed. “Yeah?”

 You breathed out a tiny laugh. “Yeah.”

 The Doctor whipped his sonic screwdriver out with a flourish and pointed it at your ankle. You winced at the whirring noise it made, and the Doctor shot you an apologetic look. He brought it up, doing the little flick that he always did, and squinted to read the results.

 “That screwdriver thing you do,” you said.

 “What about it?” the Doctor replied, slightly distracted.

 “It’s kinda hot.” Oh my God, please just shut up. “The way you flick your wrist, it’s nice. You’re nice. Everything about you is nice.” 

 The Doctor gave Amy a kind of helpless look. Amy’s eyes were still wide, her gaze still tinged with fear, but she still waggled her eyebrows at him. 

 “Not helping,” the Doctor groaned, and Amy grinned.

 “Definitely helping.” Amy reached out to tuck a piece of hair behind your ear. Her lips curved upward in a reassuring smile. “Is she going to be okay?”

 “No,” the Doctor said.

 Amy glared up at him. “What do you mean, no?”

 “Yes, I said no, in the interest of being honest.” The Doctor looked at the sonic again, then tucked it into his jacket. “She’s been scratched by an Iophinque plant, so, one of two things - either it goes away in an hour, or it kills her.”

 “I think I’d prefer the first one,” Amy said. She glanced at you, and smoothed out your hair with her hand. That felt nice too. 

 “Me too,” the Doctor muttered. “Right. I’m going to head out for just a minute. Talk with the locals. Amy -” His face went serious - “call me if the worst happens.”

 “The worst?”

 The Doctor's voice wavered. “You know what I mean.”

 You whined as he stepped farther away, and you swore you could see the Doctor’s face crumple. But then he smiled, a “I’m-totally-fine” smile. “Don’t worry,” he murmured, leaning down to press a kiss to the top of your head. “I’ll be back.”

 “He always says that,” Amy grumbled, watching him run out of the tent.

 “He always comes back,” you told her. She looked at you, her expression unreadable - and then laughed, a little bit amused and a little bit incredulous. 

 “You like him,” she said.

 There was no use hiding it now - the plant that had scratched you had to be some kind of truth serum. It felt a little ridiculous, but there was always space for ridiculous when you travelled with the Doctor. “I do.”

 “Him?” Amy stressed, and you nodded. “Seriously?”

 You nodded again, and the motion made your head spin, your eyes fluttering. “Seriously. He’s just so wonderful, and nice, and - and -”

 “Hey, look at me,” Amy sounded so far away, but there she was, kneeling right in front of you. She patted your cheek gently. “Stay awake. Keep talking. Let’s make this like a sleepover, yeah? Talking about boys. Alien boys.”

 “Alien boy,” you corrected her. “Singular.”

 “Okay, fine,” Amy said, laughing fondly. She shifted, and you tried to focus on the color of her dress. You still didn’t like it, but the neon green was loud enough to keep you awake. “What is it about him?”

 You didn’t have to think much. “He’s - he’s brilliant. That’s what he is. He’s smart, to the point of being a little annoying, and funny, and kind, so kind. So lonely but so kind. And he cares so much. I think it’s beautiful. I think he’s beautiful.” You frowned. “Does that make sense?”

 Amy nodded and smiled gently. “Yeah, I do. You said he was hot?”

 Your frown morphed into a pout. “He is!” 

 “Oh, I know,” Amy said. “Believe me, I know.”

 Silence settled over the two of you. Amy sat with you, a quiet comfort as she stroked your hair. But there was something else you wanted to say, something important, something -

 “Sad,” you said softly. You felt tears well up in your eyes. “He makes me sad. It’s okay, but -” Your breath hitched in your throat. “It’s sad, you know?”

 “What is?”

 “I don't think he loves me back.” The words were out of your mouth now. They crashed over you like a tidal wave, and now that you had actually said them, they felt real. “He doesn’t - oh, God - he doesn’t love me back.”

 Amy shook her head, her hands moving to your shoulders. She shook you slightly and you looked at her, your breathing shallow. Tears were already streaming down your face. When did that happen? “You don’t know that.”

 “It’s okay, it’s okay,” you said. Your words were blending into one another like smudged paint. That was okay too. “I’m okay with it. He doesn’t have to. He - I know he can’t.”

 Amy sighed, sadness swimming in her eyes, and wrapped her arms around you. It was nice, being hugged by Amy, but you definitely weren’t feeling nice - nausea washed over you, and you sagged in her arms. You coughed, and something warm trickled out of your mouth. Spots of bright red.

 “M’sorry,” you mumbled weakly. “Your dress, I got it all dirty.”

 “It’s okay,” Amy said, soothing you. “I haven’t even paid for it anyway.”

 “You know, I still don’t like it.” You coughed again, your chest rattling. “Hey, Amy?”

 “Hmm?”

 You pulled away from her and watched as her calm expression shifted and morphed into one of fear. It must have been bad, whatever you’d coughed up, because Amy’s eyes were the size of dinner plates. It was a little funny, and you would have laughed if your mouth didn’t taste so much like pennies.

 “Got the second option,” you slurred. “I think you should call the Doctor now.”

 You pitched forwards, hanging limply in her arms, your head resting comfortably against her shoulder. You didn’t even hear Amy scream into her phone. But you could feel her shuddering, and you wanted to tell her that it wasn’t worth it, being scared over you, but your mouth was just so full of -

 The Doctor burst through the curtains of the tent, clutching a metal cylinder in his hand. “What happened?”

 “Doctor,” Amy began, “I think she’s -”

 “I know,” the Doctor said sternly. He took you from Amy’s arms and everything seemed to lurch for a moment, shifting until everything went still, and he was above you. Through the cloth of the tent the twinkling lights outside looked like stars. It was the perfect backdrop for him. “I’ve got you.”

 “Yeah, you have.” The Doctor looking down at you, his hair falling over his face, was enough to make your heart clench painfully. Everything else hurt too. “You always have.”

 “I found an antidote, you’re going to be okay,” the Doctor said, pushing your hair away from your neck. Something cold pressed against your neck, and you jolted - you reached up to grab the Doctor’s hand, clammy fingers wrapping around his wrist.

 “Wait, wait,” you said, the words coming out jumbled, “I love you.”

 The Doctor stared. It felt like an eternity under his gaze. His eyes were wide, searching your face for something - proof that you were lying, maybe? He wouldn’t find that anywhere with you, whether you liked it or not.

 “I love you,” you continued, “and I need to tell you before you cure me and I get embarrassed and take it back.”

 The Doctor was still staring, his whole body frozen in place. He blinked once, twice, and swallowed thickly. He was never usually so quiet. 

 The silence was getting to you. “I really want you to say something.”

 “You -” The Doctor let out a heavy breath. “You love me?”

 “Yes,” you whispered. Your vision blurred, putting something that looked like a halo around the Doctor’s head. How fitting. “Cross my heart and hope to die.”

 The Doctor laughed softly. His free hand found your face, and he brushed his thumb against the corner of your lip. “You know that’s in bad taste, right?”

 “Definitely.”

 There was a click, and then a hissing noise - something sharp pinched your neck, and you felt a warmth spread over your whole body. It was taking the pain away, you noted dimly, your whole body relaxing even more as the antidote did its work. 

 “Feels nice,” you said, letting your eyes slip shut. “Thank you.”

 “You are very welcome,” the Doctor said gently. Then - “Are you with us, now? ‘Cause I really want you to be awake for this.”

 You quirked one eye open, and the Doctor smiled down at you. This wasn’t your truth-serum addled brain thinking, this was your very love-addled brain thinking - he shone brighter than anything else in the room. Even Amy’s neon green dress. Which you still didn't like. 

“Guess what?”

“What?”

 “I love you too.”

 You spluttered, your face burning despite how tired your body was, and made a noise that was probably the audible equivalent of multiple question marks. 

 All of that doubt and fear - just gone in seconds, wiped away like it had never had been there. Distantly, you could hear Amy sigh in relief, muttering something that sounded like “I said you didn’t know”.

 “Oi, don’t tell me you’re getting shy on me after a confession like that,” the Doctor said, his eyes crinkling. 

 “I was under the influence!” you protested weakly. The Doctor laughed, a sound full of fondness, and brushed a hand over your hair. It made you feel warm, like sitting right next to the fireplace in the TARDIS library. It felt like home. He felt like home.

 "I wouldn't kiss her, if I were you," Amy said. "She just coughed up blood. On me."

 You ran your tongue over your lips, still tasting the blood that was left there, and grimaced. The Doctor mirrored your expression. "Seconded."

 "There's always later," the Doctor said coolly, sending another wave of heat to your face. "You should rest. We'll get you back to the TARDIS."

 You blinked up at him. "You'll be there?"

 "Always." He pressed a soft kiss to your forehead. "This'll have to do for now," he murmured against your skin.

 "It's perfect," you whispered, your eyes fluttering shut as a welcome darkness overtook you. You're perfect, you thought, but he already knew that, didn't he?

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a/n(2): i really hope you enjoyed! i hope you guys are doing awesome, love you lots!!