#i just woke up from a nap so maybe i'll hate everything i have said here later lmao

[zmbiesuga]

I literally jumped with joy when you fallowed me back omg ily sm. So I was at the doctors and my doctor told me how he proposed to his wife and it was so sweet. He said he was stressed from finals and he had like a dream that his wife died and he dreamed of everything he couldn’t do with her. So when he woke up it was like 2 in the morning and he ran to his room to get the ring he had. He had it for two whole like years but ran to her dorm and begged her to say yes because he couldn’t wait. Could you write a fic of kuroo doing that with his boyfriend?

JUMP THEN FALL — k. tetsuro x m!reader

sypnosis: kuroo has always known that he wanted to marry you, and he's always said that he'll do it when he knows it's right. what's more perfect than asking after he had a dream about you dying?

warnings: mentions of death (nothing too graphic but still), kuroo being a fucking loser dork but i adore him so it's fine <3, fluff, happy ending!, angst if you squint really really hard, kuroo and reader are in their last year of college in this one, but i'm not in college yet so idfk how it works but i'll pretend i do!! use of the petnames 'babe' and 'baby'

notes: okay i'm so so sorry this took so long, i had a really bad depressive episode, i hope you like it, this request is really cute and i had a lot of fun writing it :D and two, that is so nice of you to say omg :( of course i followed you back, you always send me requests, you interact with my stuff a lot and you're just really nice so thank you for that <3

Kuroo has always wanted to marry you, it's the one thing he's been sure of in his entire life.

When you bring up marriage to him, however, he just tells you to "be patient" and that he'll "do it when he knows it's right" which constantly keeps you on your toes in case your dork of a boyfriend decides that the "right time" is during one of your lectures or at any inappropriate time really.

It kept Kuroo on his toes too, because what you don't know is that in the far-right corner of his sock drawer holds a small velvet box with a beautiful band inside of it. Every day he can feel his hand graze over the box, thinking to himself, maybe now is the right time.

But then he shakes his head, and decides it isn't.

And besides, as much as Kuroo loves you, he has finals to worry about. And they're really kicking his ass.

Although most people would peg Kuroo as the focused studious type (which he tried so desperately to be), the truth was that he tried so hard to procrastinate as much as possible. However, was it really procrastination if he needs the sleep?

When it was to avoid studying for finals, yes it was.

"Kuroo, sleeping to avoid studying for finals is not something you should do," your voice rippled out through the speaker of his phone, "especially if it's every single time you have them."

"Babe, you are the one who is constantly nagging me to sleep more," he rebutted, that stupid cocky tone he always had lingering in the back of his throat ever present, "I'm finally listening to you, I think you should take that as a win."

"Kuroo," your voice cracked again through that shoddy android speaker again, a certain firmness to it this time, "please promise me that you'll study, you're gonna hate yourself if you don't."

"Baby, I promise you I will, you know my word to you is good," he replied, you could hear that fucking cocky grin etching itself onto his face, "right after my little nap. I love you; I'll talk to you soon."

After you too bid your goodbyes, Kuroo made himself as comfortable on that dorm room mattress as he could, until his eyes got heavy, and he drifted off to sleep.

Kuroo could have sworn it was real.

The chase, your blood curdling scream, the way his stomach dropped to the soles of his feet when he realized he was too late.

It wasn't until he shot up in bed with that same nauseous feeling sitting in his chest as his breath came out panicked and labored had he realized it was nothing but a fucked-up dream.

Kuroo had never been so happy to wake up.

Slowly, but surely, he had calmed himself down. His breath returning to normal as the nauseous feeling in his chest disappeared, what didn't disappear, however, was that he didn't want to live life without you. He didn't want to graduate without you beside him, he didn't want to start a company without you there cheering him on along the way, and he sure as hell didn't want to imagine having a family with anyone else that wasn't you. Life was too short for hesitation, it was too short for his hesitation.

He quickly rushed out of bed, pulling an old hoodie over his torso, slipping on his shoes, and rifling through his drawer to grab that velvet box that had been sitting there for two years, begging to be let free.

Luckily for him, your dorm wasn't far from his. He hadn't even bothered to check the time on his phone, where the light flashed a large: 2:03 A.M. at him, he didn't care if his frantic speed walking down the hallway woke up everyone on that floor, he was only worried about getting to you.

When he got to your dorm, he rapped his fist against the door so hard he could've sworn that his knuckles would crack open. The door opened to a very annoyed you, but he didn't care if he interrupted your sleep, or your studying, he was just so elated to see you in front of him.

"Kuroo, what the hell?" you seethed, "It's two in the morning, what on earth —"

You were quickly cut off by Kuroo dropping to one knee in the doorway of your dorm room, pulling out that velvet box in all its glory, revealing that beautiful band you had mentioned liking to him once, you couldn't control the way your mouth slightly dropped in confusion, a wave of emotions hitting you like a tsunami.

"(Y/n), please, just listen to me," he blurted out in an almost pleading tone, "I've always wanted to wait until the right moment to ask you this, but recently, I've realized that the right moment was in front of me the entire time."

You tried to get a word in, but Kuroo's word vomit was faster.

"(Y/n), I've realized there is so much I want to do with you, so much that I can't do without you," he said, you swore you could see the tears well in the corner of his eyes, "everything from this point forward is useless if I can't do it with you by my side, so I'm begging you, even though it's two a.m. and we're both in our pajamas with messy hair and dark circles under our eyes, will you make me the happiest man alive, and marry me?"

It was your turn to be stunned, you stared down at your boyf — fiancée, in front of you with stained sweatpants and an old Nekoma sweatshirt barely big enough to cover his torso asking you to marry him at two in the morning.

You stayed quiet for so long, it scared Kuroo. Maybe this wasn't the right time, you two were still in college, this was all so sudden, so impulsive, he should have waited, he should have —

All these thoughts were expelled from his head as he felt your body weight push against his, squeezing him so tight in an embrace that he could barely breath.

"Yes," you whispered against the side of his neck, he could feel the tears from your eyes splashing there as well, "oh my god Kuroo, yes, a million times over."

He smiled softly at you, resting his own head against your shoulder as you held him in your arms. If this is what the rest of his life looked like, then god was he excited for it.

[apocalypseornaw]

Chapter One

When you make it to Lebanon you didn't expect to have neighbors, let alone for your neighbor to be the most gorgeous man you've ever laid your eyes on.

(Also before anyone worries Ben and Hayley = Charlie and Dean)

The silence that had fallen in the car would've been near deafening had it not been for the radio keeping you company. Miles flew by and despite knowing you should probably stop you also knew you only had a few more miles and you could make it to Lebanon, where Simon had already rented you a place. You could have a secure roof over the kids head and a form a plan for your next step.

You chanced a glance in the rear view mirror and nearly jumped out of your skin when Hayley met your gaze in the mirror. She grinned in the darkness of the backseat "The sun's coming up mom. You haven't gotten any sleep. Do you want me to drive a bit?" She hadn't long gotten her license and while she'd proven so far to be a safe driver given the circumstances you didn't want to chance it. 

"I'll be ok. Once we hit Kansas we can grab some food. Simon said the house is already all set up so you can amuse Amelia and James while I catch a cat nap then we can explore Lebanon a bit and get a feel for what will be our home for the next year or so" she nodded and glanced from her left where James was fast asleep in his car seat to her right where Amelia was sleeping as well. 

There was times you'd wake up and find her just sitting between the two of them as if she was keeping guard, even though you two slept with their beds between yours. It was like she was wanting to be the first line between her little siblings and danger. On one hand you were proud of her for helping with her like she did but on the other hand she was still just a teenager herself and christ everything she'd had dumped on her. The shit she'd seen and the secrets she carried, secrets to protect you. 

"You can drive while we check out Lebanon and maybe we can even pick up some baking supplies for you" she brightened a bit at the prospect of baking and you felt your chest loosen just a bit. You hated this, you hated never staying in one place too long, never being able to trust anyone besides Simon and his wife Kiya. You hated your kids never knowing security. You hated that your sixteen year old knew what she knew and that your four year olds thought moving every few months was normal.

You let out a breath that was louder than you meant for it to be and felt Hayley bump your shoulder "Don't do that. You keep us moving to keep us safe. I get that. When they get old enough they'll get that too" you glanced in the mirror and gave her a greatful albeit tearful smile "You're a pretty decent kid, you know that?" She scrunched up her nose when she grinned before saying "Well lady you're the one who raised me" 

You double checked the paperwork Simon had sent you yet again. "Hayley this is the right address isn't it?" You passed it over to her since she'd joined you in the front seat after the twins had woke up, all of you had stopped for breakfast then gotten back on the road. She looked down at the stack of papers then back up at the house that you were currently parked in the driveway of. "Yes ma'am but dang this is out our normal pay grade isn't it?" 

You nodded slowly. The house wasn't anything extraordinary but it was nice, a one story Victorian and in a decent neighborhood.  You shrugged "Lets check it out. Maybe they worked their magic and got it cheaper" she laughed "They're better than the Prue and Piper at this point" 

-----------------

You turned the engine of the car off then climbed out. Hayley grabbed James out of his car seat and had him on her hip so you grabbed Amelia and motioned for her to follow you. 

You followed the walkway up to the door while digging the key out of your pocket. Amelia pulled at your necklace, fiddling with the pendant and looking around at the squirrels chasing each other around the yard. Part of you expected the key to not work but when you slid it into the door it turned with no issue. You raised an eyebrow at Hayley then pushed the door in.

"Dad!" Ben's voice echoed through the house and Dean stifled a groan as he walked down the stairs "If you're telling me you finished the coffee again kid I swear.." 

Ben was standing at the kitchen window with a coffee cup in hand "No sir. There's plenty left but someone moved in next door"  

That was news to Dean. That was one of Bobby's places and normally he'd run it by Dean before renting it just to make sure the tenants would be a nuisance or anything. "I wonder why your grandpa didn't tell anybody. Think he's getting forgetful in his old age?" Dean asked Ben with a smirk as he went about making his coffee to his own taste before joining his son at the window. 

"We're looking like a few nosy old hags you know that right?" He scoffed and Ben shrugged then pointed "Someone's coming out" Dean watched as a woman walked out the house. She was wearing jeans, a old Scooby-Doo tshirt and had a flannel tied around her waist like she'd been wearing it then gotten hot as she'd started moving around, a haphazard looking braid kept her hair out of her face but even exhausted looking he had to admit she was beautiful. 

Ben cut his eyes up at Dean "She's hot right?" "Benjamin" Dean warned and got a laugh as an answer "I don't mean for my age! I mean for your age dad! Shes hot for you right?" "Don't you have graduation practice in a couple hours?" Dean asked and Ben nodded, still watching the window as the woman balanced an armload of dufflebags to carry into the house "We should introduce ourselves to the neighbors. Grandpa Bobby would smack us for being rude"

"You need to get ready and so do I. If she's outside we'll introduce ourselves but she's visibly busy, so we're not intruding, understood?" "Yes sir" Ben answered with a smirk that was a mirror of Dean's own expression.

You always joked you owed Simon and Kiya everything and it seemed as if they kept adding onto the list. Not only had they found you a nice place in a nice neighborhood at an extremely low price but it was furnished! 

There was two twin beds, a queen bed and couch so everyone was covered. The working plan was to move the twin beds into the room with the queen beds and you could make a pallet on the floor so you could be in the room with the kids. 

There was even a breakfast Nook with a small table and plates and cups that you had a feeling had come from Kiya. If you ever got out from under all this you owed them something huge. 

-------------

You'd gotten all your clothing squared away and decided to go grocery shopping. You had Amelia on your hip and Hayley grabbed James. You'd just locked the door and was about to turn around when you heard Hayley say "Mom, um we got neighbors"

You turned around, one hand on your purse when you spotted two people walking towards you. One was a teenager, he was probably eighteen at best. Dark hair, barely there stubble and a bright smile. 

The man that was close to your age was obviously his dad from looks alone and was unfairly good looking if you were being honest. Light brown hair and a thick stubble covering a sculpted jaw line that looked like the Greek gods themselves would be jealous over. He was a bit over six foot and when he got closer you realized he had green eyes that were a shade of damn near emerald. 

You shifted Amelia a bit and spotted Hayley do the same to James out the corner of your eye. The man spoke first, clearing his throat "I don't want to intrude or anything ma'am but my son and I want to introduce ourselves since it seems we'll be neighbors" he offered his hand so you shook it with a small smile as he said "I'm Dean..Winchester and this is my son Ben" "Winchester, like the rifle?" You asked and he laughed "Yes ma'am. Like the rifle" 

You cut your eyes at Hayley before saying "My names Y/N...Iverson" that was the last name Simon told you to use this time. "And this is my oldest Hayley and my twins James and Amelia" Dean smiled at each kid in turn "Nice to meet you all. Is it just you and the kids?" You nodded "Afraid so" 

He smiled softly "Well it's just me and Ben so I understand, though three?" He let out a sharp whistle "You're stronger than me" he grinned then said "Well if you need anything we're right next door" you nodded "Nice meeting you" 

He nodded to Hayley and Ben told you all it was nice meeting you before following his dad. Once they were out of ear shot Hayley cut her eyes at you and you shook your head "Do not" she cackled like a mad woman. She'd clocked you checking out Dean and while there was not a chance in hell you letting yourself even consider a man after the hell you'd been through it was nice to hear her laugh. 

You shook your head "Lets go get food child" she grinned "Oh let's. Better get some water too" "Why water?" Amelia asked and you glared at Hayley playfully "So I can pour it over your sister's head. James laughed "I'll help" 

[invisibleraven]

"Is it okay if I sleep here tonight?" for Willex please?

For @floating-in-the-blue whose work computer hates Tumblr

"So do ghosts sleep?" Alex asks as they sit on the bench, watching downtown LA pass them by.

"We can-but we don't need to," Willie replied. "So it's up to each individual ghost if they do or not."

"Do you?"

Willie shrugged at that. "Not really? But I didn't sleep a lot when I was a live either. Too much life to live you know? Now I have an eternity to see everything."

"Brings a new meaning to 'I'll sleep when I'm dead'," Alex snarked.

"Exactly," Willie said with a giggle, and oh, Alex already was entranced by that giggle, how it made Willie's eyes crinkle, how he folded into himself as he laughed, how his smile encompassed his face.

"So when you do sleep, where do you go? Mansions in the Malibu hills?"

"Wherever I want really," Willie answered. "I once caught a nap on top of the Hollywood sign-not the most comfy place to catch some zzzz's, but it has one hell of a view when you wake up."

"That sounds way better than sharing a fold out couch with my bandmates," Alex replied.

"I think that depends on how much you like to cuddle."

"In general? I'm not really touchy-feeley," Alex said. "But the guys...well I'm okay with the occasional hug."

"Duly noted," Willie said. "Otherwise, I hang around this club-ghost friendly, full of a party. I have a room there for when I need to crash."

"That sounds cool, though from the clubs I remember, I doubt you get a whole lot of sleep there."

"Definitely not."

They kept talking until Willie had to skate off, and Alex watched him go-wondering if-or maybe even when, he would get to see Willie again.

They kept seeing each other, as it happened. Even when maybe they shouldn't, given the whole Caleb situation. Especially after the jolts started. Alex didn't blame WIllie, and if his time was going to be up, well he was going to spend as much time with him as he could.

It was late at night, and Alex had ceded the bed to Luke and Reggie-they both enjoyed sprawling out and sleeping like eggbeaters too much for him. He could content himself with the oversized beanbag chair in the loft.

Suddenly there was a rush of air, and there was Willie, smiling shyly, holding his elbow in one of his hands-a self soothing motion that Alex had picked up early on.

"Is it okay if I sleep here tonight?" he whispered. "I...really didn't want to go back to the club."

"There's not a lot of room," Alex confessed, but shifted over so there was a space for Willie to sit next to them, even as it left them plastered together from shoulder to thigh. "Kinda cozy though."

"I know you're not a cuddler..."

"I could be, for you," Alex admitted shyly.

Willie grinned, burrowing his face into the crook of Alex's neck, curling around him. It was warm, intimate, and almost overwhelming. But it was also...really relaxing to have Willie acting like a human weighted blanket.

Alex grabbed the thin quilt he had brought up with him-he did always tend to run cold when he was alive, and being dead hadn't improved things any. Tossing the blanket over them both, he allowed himself to wrap his arms around Willie.

"You were wrong you know."

"About what?"

"You're an excellent cuddler," Willie teased, his breath tickling Alex's neck, making him shiver.

"I never said I was bad at it, just that it wasn't my favourite thing," Alex replied.

"Do you want me to move?" Willie's voice was small, vulnerable, and that made Alex want to wrap him up and keep him safe from the world that had turned someone so vibrant into someone so afraid.

So he tightened his grip. "Nope, I'm comfy now, not getting away."

Willie chuckled at that, relaxing in Alex's hold. "Sounds good to me hot dog." He let himself find a comfortable position, and soon drifted off.

Well, that is, until Alex started to snore-loud and cracking, right in Willie's ear. He stifled a laugh as it woke him, looking up at Alex's sleeping face. "Good thing we don't need sleep."

He snuggled in further, uncaring about getting any rest. He was warm and safe in Alex's arms, and even if the snoring was hilariously noisy, there was nowhere else Willie would rather be.

[hajihiko]

ok so Talky Tuesday huh!

Someone asked about like, what it's like in the first few days after waling up, and I drafted this, then got unhappy that it's not as first-few-days specific as I want it to be. But it sure is a ramble about the Survivors dealing with their stuff! So here it is, and maybe I'll have a better answer for that other person later. Uuuuuh yeah!

In general, just waking up from a sci-fi induced coma-nap is probably very disorienting, nevermind waking up into your slightly grown-out adult body that feels very uncannily familiar.

It sort of looks like they all woke up at the same time, with their world collapsing and whatnot, so it's probably just a matter of who reacts first. Souda, Hajime and Akane all make sense as characters that are quick (and loud) to react to things.

Akane has trouble even sitting up, being very malnourished and generally stiff from laying there- you know that nasty blackout dizziness you get when you're iron deficient as hell and get up too quick? It's so different from the Her that was talking about fighting just a minute ago, she might even panic (very unusual for her) when she realizes she's gonna need help getting out if she doesn't wanna tumble and fall.

I've said before that I like the idea of Souda having a muzzle (just because). Maybe it's locked somehow, and he needs help getting it off? Physically, he's fine- buffer than before, even- but it's quiet for the first few seconds and it freaks him out. He's the first to get out of his pod, just to make sure he's not alone.

Sonia is also physically fine, but her hair is all over the place- no time to put it up all fancy before getting into the digital world, I guess. She's a little hesitant to sound off or get out, since she was pretty scared when leaving the digital world, but reacts quickly to hearing Akane and Souda. She's the most unscathed, physically, which maker her feel really guilty for having been sitting in her ivory tower while commanding people.

Fuyuhiko had time to get used to his lack of an eye, so being half-blind doesn't really freak him out (until he looks at his blind eye in the mirror). He's just a slightly more calculating guy, so he waits to make sure everyone's 'in their right mind' so to speak, before getting up and out. The oddest thing is the tattoos he doesn't remember getting, and the worst part is he stayed short king while everyone else seems to have gained at least a couple inches.

Hajime is a combination of groggy and disoriented, what with being sort of newly-present in his own head, but also hyper aware of everything. He can hear everyone as they wake up, he feels tubes in his veins and he knows what they're for, he remembers being a human lab rat, he's taller, he hears Souda calling him, there is hair all up in his face, he's way buff now, his head hurts, his eye hurts, he sees people looking down at him, a part of his brain is freaking out about being podded again and another part is telling him to calm down. He doesn't really snap back into focus until he's taken all the tubes out and ensured there's no one else in the building.

That's the wakey wakey eggs 'n' bakey part. Then there's the days after.

Akane is pretty upset about her Whole Situation. The last stuff she talked about before the GameWorld collapsed was how she was confident in fighting back, and now she has trouble keeping up with everyone on a simple walk. She's definitely not used to being the Weakest, and it doesn't help that the boys seem to have buffed out, too. Thankfully Hajime has Nekomaru's talents, so he can get her on a meal plan and physical therapy plan right away. It still sucks so much, and she doesn't like to think about it, and isn't a fan of looking in the mirror, and she especially hates the knowledge that anyone could overpower her in her new state and she'd be defenseless. BUT, because she sure is Akane, she channels the agonies of losing the pride and joy she sculpted into regaining it bigger and better than before. It's a little weird and uncomfortable for everyone else at first, how she's very deliberately not thinking about it and not talking about how she feels, but she comes around the healthier she gets, and eventually she can talk about it on light notes ("if I weren't a bag of bones right now I'd kick your ass", "you guys get to have BACON but i have to eat this SMOOTHIE CRAP sorry hajime thanks for the smoothie hajime"). Thankfully- unfortunately- she's used to having the world yanked from under her and landing on her feet. And she has some solid friends that she can say is confident won't leave her in the lurch or take advantage of any kind, and will stay strong for her until she's back to being The Strongest aside from Hajime and eventually Nekomaru. Honestly the whole experience is a bit of an exercise in learning that being weak for a little while won't kill her (this time) and that she has a purpose besides being strong. Nekomaru talked about putting more of an emphasis on her self-control and spirituality, and I think he'd be real proud of her progress when he wakes up.

I might've mentioned before that I think Souda has like... the closest thing to an improvement? A lot of the things he considers important are in place; he has his friends, and they remember him, and they won't (can't) leave, and he is kind of super important now considering they're roughing it on an abandoned island and he's The Machine Guy. Doesn't mean he's not freaked out about it all, though. For one, there is a room with sleeping (dead??) terrorists with his friends' faces, and he isn't sure if they'll wake up, or when, or if they'll still be his friends. He does have his four closest friends with him, but they're also all he has, and the pressure of Not Fucking Up is heavier now than ever. Also is his dad still alive or what?? He doesn't remember, and has a couple of guesses how that might've ended, but no answers. Not great for his anxiety! He throws himself into being useful a little bit, making a wheelchair for Akane in case her legs give out at a bad time, sews a new eyepatch for Fuyuhiko (yeah apparently he can sew! Handy boy), sets off just trying to Fix What's Broke on the island. It's a coping mechanism, maybe not the best one but definitely not the worst. The first couple of days, he gets these really bad headaches, realizes fairly quickly (when it's nighttime and no one's awake and he needs to get his mind off stuff but doesn't wanna bother anyone but wow he's more of a nightowl than he remembered) that he needs caffeine a lot more than he used to. Kicking that habit is still a work in progress. Going out on the ship and doing daring deeds of good is his own personal challenge to be braver.

Sonia is physically stellar. Maybe even better than she used to be, almost; her skin is extra silky smooth, the clothes she had with her are all gorgeous, her hair and nails are perfectly trimmed and clean (save for whatever Pod grime might exist). It feels bad though, because a good princess wouldn't be pristine while the entire world is in chaos and war. She doesn't exactly have internet access, but she asks Hajime to ask Makoto what's going on in her country, and the non-answer was a very telling "you don't want to hear this right now". She demands to because she isn't one to shy away from the brutal stuff, but yeah, it does not do wonders for her mental state. One of the first things she does to try and make peace with her new self is cutting her hair and throwing the fancy ballgowns into some backroom storage (who knows, maybe Mahiru or Hiyoko will want to try them on). She doesn't have a kingdom anymore and she wouldn't want to call herself a princess even if she did, but she does have the island- later, the ship- and the new world. And it's. Something? Not something to rule, but something to care for and respect. It sucks that she'll never get to have the "normal" experiences she wanted, like walking to school with a certain someone or having a picnic in a public park or doing The Karaoke, since normal innocent things like that no longer exists without substantial pretending. Her Despair self really screwed her over by making sure she'd never get to pretend to be an average girl, and she keeps feeling the effects for years to come.

Fuyuhiko has been great at compartmentalizing for a long time now (so is Akane, but Fuyuhiko hasn't lost The Most Important Thing to him- that happened in the game, and hes already gotten used to Filing It Away). Even when they gradually get their memories back, he has the easiest time handling it because unlike them, he's already aware of his own capacity for lethal violence. Like Sonia, he struggles with his identity being meaningless now, but while her title was one of a huge scale, his was always a bit more contained, and he can project it onto the handful of friends he has left. It's not yakuza, but it's not so different either; he's back to being feared and mistrusted, and taking responsibility for bad things while trying to sneak in some good here and there. He's not commanding anyone, but he is a bit of a strategist, and he doesn't have underlings, but he has friends, and he's just as serious about them being under his protection as he would be about fellow yakuza. It's fine and he can handle it, but he also feels really useless. Kazuichi is a weapons and bomb expert, Akane is more of a martial fighter than he'll ever be, and Hajime is just The Best At Everything obviously. Sonia is basically Fuyuhiko's talent times a hundred (minus the prim and proper princess part). All Fuyuhiko can do is plan, delegate, shoot a gun, and do his best to keep everyone going (even Hajime, who otherwise takes that last job upon himself). It turns out he's actually great at corralling people into taking care. He'll end up being a bit too good at compartmentalizing and doesn't allot himself much time to grieve and come to terms, which isn't great for someone with a chronic guilt problem (I've mentioned this before, but everyone has an unspoken agreement to make sure he doesn't do anything rash in the heat of battle or the aftermath). His dedication to being a better person stays strong. Also he smokes now?? Which he hates but also he figured it would happen at some point.

Hajime is the most difficult: he has his own inferiority complex, but he's objectively hyper competent. He's a little bit the most normal of them, but he's a superhuman talent machine. He barely knows who he is, but he remembers everything. He has a very, very hard time, but he's so goddamn good at pushing it aside and focusing on everyone else, until he isn't, and just kind of falls apart. I've already talked about Hajime post-game several times, I dont wanna repeat myself too much, so I'll talk about the distant future; but he's both a shamble of a human being and also the best leader possible for this group. He's got issues but, and I have to underline this, he is so appreciated and favoured and loved that he almost can't help evolving into his best self. It takes time and effort and trials and error but god damn he ends up happy despite everything.

[nyubiecore]

1201 Jelly ☆ choi chanhee

a the boyz new oneshot

"lots of jealousy and I need love, please hold me tight when I look at you" idol choi chanhee x f! reader

genre: angst(not really) , fluff

in which you find your jealous boyfriend drunk at the after-party

you were scrolling through social media the whole train ride to the mall.

you refreshed the home page of your Instagram when your favorite boy posted a picture. it was a picture of him at the company's rooftop with white outfit on, looking confused.

you smile to yourself admiring him. you misses him so much since you guys last saw each other a month ago.

you opened the comments scrolling through the compliments and good words liking each and every one of them - replying and reporting hate comments.

then you post your comment too "my boyfriend, you look so good" there's a few comments like that except- yours is a fact.

the train ride came to an end

you put your phone in your bag walking to the mall. you beelined to the grocery store on the 2nd floor picking out ingredients for pizza and a few other groceries to restock.

everytime you miss chanhee, pizza is your comfort. it reminds you of him and there's countless times you cry while eating them thinking of him. done for the groceries, you walked pass ice cream parlor and bubble tea stand when you saw olive young , your favorite shop.

you didn't hesitate into stepping in knowing your skincare products were running out. you walked through the face pack section when your eyes darted at mediheal's face masks. you looked over it taking a few of them in means to support sunwoo's brand and also aiming for the pc you'll get when you purchase 10 or more face packs.

satisfied with your finds, you also came over avene, a brand hyunjae is the face of currently. you wanted to grab some but you cancelled the thought when you looked over the price. "maybe next time" you thought to yourself but takes a picture of the rack full of avene products as a reminder and also to upload them on your social media.

grabbing your needs after going through dermatory, mediheal, medicube, dewytree, avene, all the brands the boyz is a model of, you beeline to the counter before you make another stop to any other sections already hearing your wallet cry in broke. getting out of the store after buying it, you busily unlock your phone and went to your deobi Instagram account posting a story out of pictures of products you purchased and took a look at.

you posted individually for each brand and putting captions such as "supporting my babe's brand" etc as a joke on mediheal, avene, dermatory, dewytree, and medicube.

-

when the clock stroked 7 pm, you quickly woke up from your nap and went to the kitchen. you sorted out ingredients for making pizza and put away others. you immediately started making the dough. halfway with the sauce, your phone that was playing 'Jelly', a kyeobmuda unit song started vibrating like a madman- or madphone. "tbz juyeon" on the screen, you accepted the call in confusion what brought your boyfriend's friend to contact you at 8:30 pm?

"hello? juyeon?" "hi y/n" "hey its been quite long since we last talked" "yeah, i'm sorry we've been crazy busy" "it's okay, what's the occasion though? its not like you to call me first" "nah its nothing, sangyeon hyung just asked me a favor to call you" "yeah? why? did something happened to chanhee?" "yep, you got it right" "w-what happened? is something going on?" "nah nothing big, he just is.. having a breakdown right now" "what?" "yeah.. um just come to the restaurant we always go for after-parties" "wh- what why?" "yeah um.. please hurry up you'll understand what ever's going on right now" "y-yeah i'll be on my way" "sure, thanks !!" juyeon last said before ending the call leaving you dumbfounded whatever is happening to chanhee.

you turned off the fire heating the sauce and wrapped up everything before taking your phone and wallet, locking your door and rush to the restaurant juyeon mentioned. it wasn't far away from your house that you were thankful.

from the restaurant glass window, you saw all the 10 boyz except chanhee and a few staff having drinks, talking and eating the snacks chilling. you step inside the restaurant and search for the table they were at when you made eye contact with hyunjae.

"oh my god thank you" he let out before walking over to you

"what happened? why did juyeon call and what's with chanhee?" you ask all the question to the brown haired boy while walking to the table they were sat on

"well," he stopped on his track upon a boy who were sleeping, head on the table before your brain connected all the dots, too familiar to the lean frame, black hair wearing a saint germain sweatshirt and chanel beanie. it was chanhee "please do us a big favor and take this drunken boy away"

you scanned through the boy quite confused what made him drink so much?

"take him away? as in bring him home? the dorm?" you ask dumbfounded

"nope, certainly anywhere but the dorm" hyunjae replies

"don't you guys have a schedule tommorow?" you were more and more confused since chanhee always tells if they were allowed to go home or are having a break

"nope, we're on a week break starting tommorow so there'll be no one to look after him if you bring him to the dorm" he explains the obvious also weird why you didn't know about it

"oh- sure thanks for telling me" you smile at hyunjae before walking over to chanhee, tapping his back a few times in an attempt to wake him up from his sleep. upon seeing him twitching his eyes open, you made eye contact with him.

"hello master chanhee, i'm your assistant sent to bring you home" you said playfully knowing he wasn't in his right mind. chanhee scans through you then sits back up eyes still on you

"you look like my girlfriend" he says smiling sheepishly sending blushes through your cheek

"oh really? she must be beautiful then" you say patting his back a little earning a quiet "hm" and chanhee closed his eyes back drifting into dream world

you scoffed when you stood back up sitting beside him when changmin scoots over to juyeon's side making space for you

"what even happened? he isn't the type to drink till death?" you asked the members

"i think something happened that you knew better than every one of us" jacob replied calmly

"i mean it did weird me out, he would always ditch the after-party whenever we were allowed to go home but he stayed back and even drank like a fish from the beginning. we didn't even start playing games" changmin says beside you that was supported by nods from the members

you look at him sleeping soundly before standing back up

"thank you for calling me, i'll take him away then" you say before making another attempt to wake chanhee up

"chanhee, wake up. can you stand on your feet? we should go home" you say calmly to the drunk boy

he twitched his eyes open, scanning you and when he looked like he recognized you, he let out a "hmph" scrunching his nose before standing up

you look at him before wrapping your side around his body, trying to support him walk. you wanted to ask him why he didn't tell that he were on holiday and so many other things but you calmed yourself down

you made a stop at the convenience store where you put chanhee to sit on the chair outside the store buying some hangover drinks then picking him back up rushing to your house as you felt your shoulder sore

pressing the code to your house, you rest chanhee on the sofa. turning the lights on, you were met with a now fresher looking chanhee. the walk must've helped a bit. you walk over to his side wrapping your arms over him leaning into him.

"did you go shopping today" he asked- stated?

"yeah.. how'd you know"

"you looked happy buying sunwoo's brand"

"what..?" you asked confused where this is coming from

"i saw your update" then everything connected, he was jealous when you smiled to yourself looking at him who's eyes were anywhere but at you

"omg- is our chanhee jealous? that's why you drank so much and didn't even inform me about your week break?" you teased holding him tighter

"nope, definitely not, i'm perfectly fine when my girlfriend posted my friends brand products with questionable captions, i am perfectly fine sir" he said in a sarcastic tone

"heyy~ still you know you're my favorite member right?"

"yeah sure"

"i mean as a fan i should be equal with my support and.. as your girlfriend, i should get on the good side of your friends too shouldn't i?" you comfort him when you see him starting to allow eye contact with you

"hey but still.. you bought so much of mediheal's products. weren't you aiming for that pc when buying multiple products?"

you kept silent knowing you were caught

"hey- wow that's so mean, you should've just asked me for them instead of throwing away your money like that. what is the use of your idol boyfriend at times like this?"

you look at him in confusion when his attitude changed 90 degrees "its fine, there's no thrill in getting them if I don't work hard for it"

"sure- sure" he says, done with you "did you get them though? i heard it was sold out the 2nd day?"

"yep, i didn't but i guess atleast i got to try the product. i heard its good" you say trying not to make him nag

"-oh right, go wash up. i'll finish making my pizza and we could have our movie night together!" you say tightening the hug

"nope, go call sunwoo to join you, why would i" he says jokingly sulking

you laugh at his turns of attitude cupping his face and sending kisses all over them "nope, only me, the pizza and my boyfriend" when you say tints of pink all over his cheek reminding you of a tomato

"my chanhee is turning into a tomato" you tease him already steadying yourself to run away

"YAH DON'T CALL ME A TOMATO" he chases you all around the house..

-end-

[goldensstateofgrace]

could you maybe do the "just lay back down, and I'll take care of you" first time prompt with harry?

Main Masterlist | Requests |

Ok so I combined these two asks and made a fluff / self Indulgent little fic lol Also just a forewarning this is not my best work i literally wrote this in less than 30 mins dsjansdjfh;odjf;dsjk

Summary: y/n’s sick and older!H takes care of her

Warnings: mentions of anxiety, chest pains, being sick, lmk if I missed anything (nothing sexual purely a fluff / comfort fic)

Word count: 944

Hope you enjoy! Happy reading - G <3

When you first met Harry you never could have imagined he would be seeing you like this so soon. You didn’t want him seeing you like this but he's a stubborn asshole most of the time anyways, not giving up until he got his way, much like you.

He insisted on taking care of you when you came down with a fever of 100.7 and a raw wet cough, he wouldn’t take no for an answer when he stated more than asked if he could stay with you to make sure you were ok. After putting up more of a fight than the little energy you had allowed, you finally gave up and let him make his famous chicken noodle soup he told you his mum used to make him when he was sick. 

The thing about being sick was, you absolutely hated it, ever since you were a child you couldn’t stand being sick. You hated when your throat hurt and you had to cough, you hated throwing up and the hot and cold flashes that came with having a fever, the chest and body aches where you can’t get comfortable when you’re trying to rest.

But what you hated the most was that your anxiety got worse. It happens every time you get sick, the thought of just a head or chest cold turning into bronchitis or pneumonia. It scared the absolute shit out of you.

Of course your mother would try and comfort you, rubbing your back and hugging you real tight, whispering that ‘everything will be okay’. Anything to soothe you, but sometimes it just wouldn’t work. 

You could be resting, trying to sleep but your mind would go to places where you’d wonder if your chest was hurting because it was more than a small chest cold. That you weren’t going to be okay and you needed to go to the hospital. 

You didn’t want Harry to be around when you had your anxiety attack, you normally can calm yourself down now that you're older and can somewhat take care of yourself. You didn’t want him to see you like that, especially when he’s older and you haven’t been dating that long. 

It was day two of being sick and waking up with a really raw cough and your nose running that you noticed that your chest was hurting more than the day before. You didn’t say anything when Harry woke up and offered to make you some tea with honey and lemon to soothe your aching throat. 

You didn’t say anything when he cuddled up behind you that afternoon after you told him you were tired and wanted to take a nap. Your head on his chest as he rubbed up and down your back softly, soothing the body aches you feel. You didn’t say anything as you both layed there, him falling asleep as your mind ran wild with possibilities that the chest pains you were feeling were more that to do with your cold. 

You only said something when he found you crying on the bathroom floor, having gently slipped from his arms and the bed when your anxiety got to be too much and the tears started to fall. 

“M-my chests h-hurts,” you almost sob, fear leaking into your hoarse voice. 

He nods, brows furrowed in concern, “Ok baby, it’s okay. Let’s get you back in bed.” He softly picks you up bridal style, your arms tightening around his shoulders and you hide your tear stained face in his neck. 

“Shh, darling, everything’s going to be alright.” he coos. 

Harry walks back into your bedroom and over to the side of the bed where all your pillows are propped up because it’s easier to breath sitting up than laying down. He gently places you on the soft mattress, pulling the comforter out from under your sock covered feet and pulling it up under your chin. 

“Just lay back, I’ll take care of you, okay baby?” he whispers, pushing a stray piece of hair off your forehead before he leans down and places a kiss there. You nod, letting out a cough and a weak smile. 

Harry walks into the kitchen and is back a minute later with some medicine, sitting on the edge of the bed next to you as he pours it in the little medicine up and hands it to you, “This is supposed to help ease the pain in your chest and throat, it’s a nighttime medicine which will probably make you sleepy but you need some sleep, i felt you tossing and turning all night last night.” he speaks softly, smiling over at you when you shoot him a small glare. “I also got you some more tea and crackers, because I know you don’t like the taste of the medicine.” Harry laughs softly as the soft smile you shoot him, an immediate mood change from glaring at him just a second ago. 

You quickly take the medicine and immediately reach for the tea harry’s holding, taking a long sip of the warm liquid helping soothe your throat. 

After laying back and Harry climbing in bed next to you, you cuddle up to him, your anxiety slowly floating away as Harry puts on your favorite marvel movies and you eat some crackers. You can feel yourself start falling asleep while the pain you were feeling in your chest eases. 

You fall asleep to Harry softly rubbing your back and placing a kiss to the top of your head while Marvel's Captain America: The Winter Soldier plays in the background.

Taglist: @randomwriter1021 @marlananicole17 @whoreforthecullens @hc-geralt-23 @afuckenslutforharrybro @wiiildflowerrr @lonelyheart5 @xoxokiaraaxoxo @myfavfanficsever @onlyangel-k @cuddleluvr @Sophiawithanph @lovegiven. @theshyspy @watchyourbluesturngolden @thesadstoryofme

[catharticboredom]

#tlou2 spoilers

Okay so this will be like the first time I talk about explicit tlou2 spoilers, so be warned. I will type them up under the cut, but again, spoiler warning. basically it will consist of me re-writing the story to make it less shitty.

I was just theorizing how tlou2′s story could be better by not changing too too many elements from it. For example, I think I would keep Abby being directly affected by joel’s actions in the firefly hospital, and maybe joel dying. However, instead I would have him die at the end of the game, and Abby also die at the end of the game. I will elaborate more below. 

So what if we started playing off as Abby AND Ellie. So at first, we play as Abby, but it is actually set around the time of the end of the first game (eg around the time of the firefly hospital incident). She calls herself “A” or smth so players still think she is Ellie’s mom like they have been speculating since she was first revealed (and Ellie’s mom = Anna, so it adds to the their theories). However, we also play as Ellie at the same time (by that I mean we can get 2 chapters as Abby, then 1 chapter as Elli or smth), BUT, for Ellie, her timeline takes place during “present day” (ie with Dina and everyone. HOWEVER, the player does not realize that there are 2 different timelines UNTIL the midpoint of the game, where we have built up to the death of Abby’s father and friends at the hands of Joel. And BEFORE this reveal, in Ellie’s part, amidst all of the Seraphite cult shit, there has been this stranger that doesn’t seem to be part of the cult, yet still has it out for Joel and Ellie and their friends (i haven’t thought too much about how this would be achieved yet, but maybe Joel gets shot by someone, and the bullet used does not match the standard guns the Seraphites use or some shit, idk). 

Thus, the second half of the game has us just play as Ellie, realising that the stranger that was after them was actually Abby, out of revenge for Joel killing her friends and father. Maybe now does ellie confront Joel about the firefly hospital incident, as things have always been tense between them since then, and does Joel finally confirm Ellie’s suspicions that there were never any other immune ppl like her. Idk what would happen in the middle, but stuff happens, and eventually, in a final confrontation, Abby manages to capture Joel and Ellie. Ellie pleads to Abby to let Joel go, but Abby kills him. Consumed with rage, Ellie fights and almost kills Abby, before she realises the whole cycle of revenge shit, and stops herself (maybe Dina helps to snap her out of it or smth, like how, in the leaked cutscenes Lev does w/ Abby). The final scene is Ellie with Dina and the baby or some shit by Joel’s grave, and Abby and Lev and Yara go do something else idk. (side note: from the leaks, I assume that Yara is one of the ppl Ellie kills after Joel dies in the leaked tlou2 story, since it is just Lev and Abby at the end of the leaked story, and I have not seen any mentions of Yara yet).

These were just a series of random musings that ended up hopefully somewhat cohesive. I just thought it would be a lot more interesting if Abby were painted in a sympathetic light first, and THEN she ends up being the “villain”, but it sucks b/c we saw the pain she went through (and we saw how nice her dad and friends were before Joel killed them, etc). 

Idk i just hate the actual story we got and think it could be so much better and not just for shock value.

[castiel-barnes]

Domesticity.

Pairing: Javier Peña x fem! Y/N Peña. (Reader is married to Javier).

Summary: After the events of Escobar and the Cali cartel, the one thing Javier expected least was to settle down.

Warnings: Fluff. Slight angst. Pregnancy. Medical inaccuracies. Mentions of throwing up. Swearing. Soft Javi. Like extra soft.

Word count: 2.7k

A/N: Yet another early morning thought that I got.

Tags: @phoenixhalliwell @scribbledghost

Picture from Pedro pascals Instagram at pascalispunk.Taken in 2013.

After years of running around Colombia and the amount of informants slept with. The last thing people expected who knew Javier Peña, was to settle down.

He had found you and fell hard in love. And the same thing happened to you. After being with you, Javier had no need to go have a one night stand with any of the girls from the brothels or any informants. Because he had you.

It was quite unheard of within the DEA, Javier Peña and the domesticity of having a family.

*********************

Javier had been out for most of the day, which you were kinda glad for. You had been feeling sick since you woke up and when Javi finally left the apartment, you finally rushed to the bathroom to throw up your breakfast.

Then it hit you. Your time of the month has been far more late than normal. After throwing up, you digged out the spare pregnancy test you had at the back of the cupboard for emergencies.

"Oh fuck." You said quietly to yourself. It was positive. Neither of you had discussed the topic of kids. It was something that you wanted, but not sure if Javi wanted it.

"Hi cariño, I'm home." Javier called out,

"H-hey, I'll be out in a moment." You replied from the bathroom, quickly wiping your tears away. Walking out the bathroom, you smiled like you usually did and kissed.

"What's up honey?" He asked frowning a little,

"Oh nothing much, why'd you ask?" You replied.

"Cause I can tell you've been crying." Javier said looking at you. Sighing you placed your head against his shoulder.

"I hate how easily you read me sometimes." You pouted, and pulled him to the couch and sat him down. Letting out a shaky breath you held his hands gently in yours.

"I really need to tell you something. B-but I don't know how to say it, and I- I know we haven't discussed anything about this." You continued starting to ramble from being anxious.

"Honey, honey calm down what do you need to tell me?" He said frowning even more, stroking your hair back.

"Javi... I'm pregnant." You stated. There was a stunned silence that blanketed the apartment.

"Really?" Javier asked. You nodded and looked away tears springing back to your eyes. Javi wiped your tears away and smiled pulling you into a hug.

"I'm so happy mi amor." Javier stated,

"You are?" You asked looking up at him.

"I am cariño, we can have a little Peña running around the place." Javier responded smiling. The two of you hugged for a while and had dinner, then decided to lay in bed and relax. At some point you must have fallen asleep on top of Javi, and stayed asleep until early morning.

Your not sure what woke you up, but you could feel Javier's hand on your stomach his hand stroking his hand back and forth.

"Cariño? You ok?" You asked quietly,

"What if the kid doesn't like me? What if I do something wrong?" Javier replied.

"What do you mean?" You said frowning,

"I mean, I'm not a good person cariño. I've done things and seen things that shouldn't be seen. I've never been the best with children, I don't know how to look after something so small and innocent." Javi stated.

"Javier Peña you listen to me. You are not a bad man, yes you've seen bad shit and maybe shot a couple of people but those people were the bad guys. Not you. You will be a good father Javi, I just know it. Plus you're not the only one who hasn't had much experience with children." You explained firmly. In truth you were the youngest sibling, and the only experience you had with children was when your cousin had her baby. But you lost contact with them a while ago.

"Thank you. For putting up with me Y/N." Javier responded, nuzzling his head into the crook of your neck. You stroked his hair back out of his face, but it was evident that he had been tossing around for a while.

You started drifting off again until you felt like throwing up again. Gently rolling Javi off of you, you rushed to the bathroom to throw your dinner up. You groaned as you hunched over the toilet, then felt a pair of large hands rubbing your back.

"You ok cariño?" Javier asked worriedly,

"Morning sickness." You responded throwing up again.

"You need me to get anything for you? Water?" He said still rubbing your back gently,

"Please." You said "thank you." You continued. Javier bought you a glass of water, and let you clean yourself up before carrying you back to bed.

"Try get some sleep mi amor, neither of us have work tomorrow dont worry." Javier stated,

"M'kay love you Javi." You said drifting off to sleep.

"Te amo mucho cariño, y nuestro pequeño bebé." Javier whispered kissing the top of your head.

********************

2 months pregnant:

You were at home today and Javier was at work. And today you noticed something slightly different about your appearance. Realising what it was, you smiled and you got excited about telling Javi.

Opening the door Javi was immediately greeted by your smile and hugging him.

"Well hi there cariño, what you so happy about?" Javier asked smiling and kissing you,

"Come look." You replied dragging him to the room. When you got to the bedroom you sat him down on the bed and took your top off. Turning to the side you smiled and run your hand over your small bump.

You looked at Javi and saw his jaw drop.

"That’s your little kid in there mi amor." You said looking at your bump. Javi smiled and pulled you gently in front of him.

"Oye chico, soy yo tu papá. Estoy muy emocionado de conocerte dentro de unos meses." Javier stated quietly then kissing your stomach. He looked up at you with slightly watering eyes and smiled,

"We're going to have a kid cariño." He continued.

"Yeah we are. I love you so much Javier Peña." You stated kissing the top of his head,

"I love you too baby. I'm so excited." Javier replied. Out of nowhere you just got really emotional and started crying, which confused the hell out of Javi.

"Woah, woah baby what's wrong?" He said quickly standing up hugging you,

"I-im just so fucking happy. I have you and now we have our little kid. Oh im a mess, fucking hormones." You replied crying into his arms. And that what made it clear for Javi, your hormones were heightend due to the pregnancy. Javi chuckled and kissed the top of your head.

"Don't laugh." You stated quietly sniffing,

"Ok, I'm sorry baby I won't laugh I promise. Im happy to cariño." Javi replied smiling.

"But I like when you laugh its cute." You said looking at him.

You were glad to have Javi, yes he could be a bit stubborn and hard headed sometimes. But around you, he was gentle, understanding and everything you could wish for in a man. Although he had doubts about being a good father, you knew that no matter if you had a little girl or a little boy they would have him wrapped around their little finger.

**********************

4 months pregnant:

"Baby? Wake up, we need to get ready to go to the doctors." Javi said gently, trying to wake you up,

"Mhm..." you groaned and closed your eyes again.

"Come on honey, don't wanna be late to the appointment. I promise when we get home I'll run out and grab anything you're craving and we can nap." Javier stated stroking your hair back out of your face.

"Promise?" You asked leaning into his touch,

"Yeah cariño I promise. We'll go to the appointment, come home and then anything you want I'll get ok?" He replied smiling as you leaned into him.

"Ok." You smiled getting up slowly. The two of you got changed and got in the car. Arriving at the doctors, Javier could feel some anxiety radiating off of you.

"You ready baby?" He asked holding your hand,

"Yeah, im ready." You smiled at him and gave the back of his hand a kiss.

"Come on then baby." Javi said getting out the car, walking round to your side to open the door for you. The two of you sat in the waiting room for a while before getting called in. Laying there on the bed, you gasped at how cold the gel was on your stomach. Looking at the screen the doctor told you that you were going to have a little girl.

"We're having a baby girl?" Javier asked is disbelief,

"Yeah cariño, we're gonna have a baby girl to look after and love." You smiled with tears rolling down your cheeks. Getting home you cried from happiness and this was one of the only times you saw Javier cry.

"Baby can you get me pickles and ice cream please? Maybe some chocolate too." You asked him,

"Of course I can cariño. Anything else you want?" Javier replied.

"Maybe get 2 of each just incase, you never know." You said,

"Okie dokie." He responded. Javier left the apartment and came back about 20 minutes later with pickles, ice cream and chocolate.

"Here you go mi amor, got what you wanted." Javier stated coming through the door with a shopping bag,

"Thank you love." You replied smiling and getting some ice cream and pickles. The two of you sat there, with you snacking on your pickles and ice cream and Javier with his arm around you.

"We need to think of some names for our little girl." Javier stated,

"We do." You responded eating another pickle.

"Maria?" Javier started out,

"Hmm that's a bit overused I think, Isabella?" You replied.

"True, true. Isabella is a nice name. Isabella Peña. That's nice. Rosa?" Javier responded. The two of you sat there writing down names and slowly but surely got it down to the name you both liked.

"I think Isabella." You stated,

"Yeah perfect. Isabella Peña, it's beautiful." Javier replied quietly smiling. Javi slid down the bed a little so his head was by your bump, and lifted up your shirt a little bit.

"Hola Isabella, soy papá de nuevo. Solo quiero que sepas que te amo mucho a ti y a tu mamá y que siempre los protegeré a los dos." Javier whispered to the bump and kissed it. About 4 months ago at the start of your pregnancy, Javier had his doubts about being a father and how what he did would affect your daughter. But now here you were 4 months pregnant eating ice cream and pickles, and he was being so gentle with you and looking after you and your baby girl so well.

"You're going to be such a great dad Javi." You smiled running your hand through his hair,

"You think so cariño?" He looked up at you with those doe eyes of his.

"Yeah... I do. You've been looking after me so well baby, and I just know that little Isabella will absolutely adore you." You responded,

"Thank you cariño." Javier said rubbing his hand over the bump.

*********************

9 months pregnant/ due date week:

It was the week that you were due to give birth to Isabella. Javier decided that he'd take the week off before his maternity leave was due to start.

It was about 2 in the morning, when you woke up. And that's when you felt it, your water had just broken.

"O-oh no oh shit why now? Javi wake up, baby please wake up." You said pushing his shoulder,

"Carino what's wrong?" He asked you groggily, his eyes barely open.

"The baby is coming." You stated. And that one statement there got him up and awake.

"You serious right now?" He asked looking at you finding your face quite serious,

"Ohhhhhh shit. Yes I'm fucking serious." You replied having your first contraction. You looked at Javier and one of the only things he saw in your eyes was fear.

"Ok, ok I've got your bag honey. It's going to be ok I promise." Javi stated chucking jeans and a shirt on with shoes, and then helping you with some shoes.

"Javi im scared." You stated,

"I know cariño, I know but im going be right next to you the entire time. I promise." Javi replied holding your hand. Squeezing his hand as you went through another contraction, he held you up as he walked you to the car.

In the car, javi was going as fast as he could to the hospital whilst letting you hold his hand.

"Just breathe baby, you've got it." Javier said reassuring you. Getting to the hospital you were immediately given a room and pain killers to help.

"We're gonna meet our baby girl soon javi." You stated looking at him,

"Yeah cariño, any minute now we'll be holding our girl." Javi responded. You two were somewhat relaxing when you weren't having any contractions. It had been about an hour and half since your water had broke. It all seemed to by in a blur, one minute you were sleeping, the next your water had broke and now you need to push.

"J-javi go get a nurse. I really need to push." You exclaimed squeezing your eyes shut and letting your head fall back,

"Ok cariño ok, I'll be right back." Javier replied kissing the top of your head. Javi rushes out the room and finds a nurse. He came back into the room with a nurse, who were both by your side. The nurse told you to start pushing and so you did.

"Ahh fuck! J-javi I don't know if I.... if I can do it." You stated squeezing his hand as hard as you could,

"Yes you can cariño, come on you can do it. Just breathe with me, you're so strong." Javier replied stroking your hair back.

A few minutes later, and hard pushing you heard the cries of your beautiful little girl. You let your head fall back on the pillow and caught your breath.

"I told you that you could do it cariño. She's so beautiful." Javier said smiling at you and kissing you gently. The nurse bought Isabella over to you, so that you could hold her. Pulling down your gown a little bit you laid Isabella on your chest so you could have some skin to skin contact.

"Hey baby girl, welcome to the world. Oh you're so beautiful, she has your eyes miel. Big brown eyes." You smiled gently stroking your hand over Isabella's back,

"Do you wanna hold her?" You continue looking at Javi.

"Really?" Javier looked at Isabella,

"Yeah baby, she is your daughter after all." You responded giggling a little. Javier looked between you and Isabella then back to you and saw you nod. Standing up from his chair he took the shirt off that he threw on before leaving, and gently took Isabella from you.

People had told you to look out for Javier Peña when you first joined the DEA. The stubborn, hard headed DEA agent who had one hell of a reputation. But now as you saw your husband hold your little girl barely an hour old. All of that stubbornness, hard headedness and reputation had dissipated.

"Hola, cariño, es un placer conocerte finalmente. Eres tan hermosa como tu mamá." Javier speaked to Isabella quietly as he say down in the chair. You smiled and laid your head back again, eyes drooping a little bit.

"You wanna sleep for a little while? You just pushed a fucking human out." Javier asked,

"Language we have tiny human now. Yes I wanna sleep." You replied somewhat out of it, already drifting off to sleep.

"Haha ok baby, you get some sleep now." Javier chuckled.

*********************

Home:

When you were finally discharged from the hospital, you and your husband with your baby finally went back home. You got home and Javi changed the sheets on your bed from where your water broke.

Picking Isabella up, you showed her round the apartment although you knew she was in a milk coma from her feeding.

"Do you wanna put her down for her nap cariño?" You asked Javi,

"Yeah ok." Javier replied with a wide grin as he took Isabella from you. Gently Javier bounced Isabella as he made his way to her cot. Standing next to him as the two of you looked over your daughter. You smiled and placed your head on his shoulder.

"Our baby is so beautiful cariño, we did good." Javier said quietly,

"That we did. See I told you, that you'd make a good father. I have a feeling we might have a hard time saying 'no' to that cutie." You replied kissing his cheek.

"Agreed." Javier said smiling giving you a proper kiss.

Safe to say that the only people who really get to see Agent Javier Peña soft side is you his wife Y/N Peña, and his daughter Isabella Peña.

[justice4harwin]

Light's Corruption- Chapter IV

Pairing: The DarklingxAlina

Summary:With few friends at the Little Palace, Alina must work to win the favour of her fellow grisha and their commander, who makes her feel light headed every time she sees him.

After training in Os Alta for two years, the king grows tired of waiting and demands the Sun Summoner joins a western post near the Fjerdan border along with the rest of The Second Army to test her abilities.

Something happens. Suddenly, Alina wants blood to run down the rivers and those who stand in her and The Darkling’s way will be blinded by her light and swallowed by his shadows.

It won’t be pretty

Rating: 18+

Click here for chapter 3

Tags are in the comment section. If you dont wanna be there or wanna be added please let me know 😊

Anyways, I hope you like this one. I'm really excited over a particular scene 😏😏

Chapter 4: golden butterfly, black rose

Alina woke up with a new purpose: to observe and listen.

She hastily threw the blankets and sheets off of her and put on her kefta as she realized she might be late for breakfast.

Running down the stairs, hair a mess, the Sun Summoner smiled and greeted everyone on her path.

Some replied. Others just stared oddly.

She entered the hall to find that, as usual, Marie and Nadia had left a seat empty between them. Alina gingerly took it.

"Good morning!"

They gave her smiles as they reciprocated the greeting.

"You're in a good mood today." Nadia noticed, taking her spoon.

"I slept like a baby." she lied. She hadn't gotten that much sleep -Genya must've gotten even less- but she felt good that day.

Just the day before, she had been able to summon on her own for the first time, and she had to stay positive if she wanted to accomplish her new mission.

She engaged more in the chatter with the grisha women that day, venturing so far as to reply with questions of her own to get to know them better.

"I didn't know you had a brother, Nadia." she said, genuinely surprised as they made their way to Botkin's stables.

The woman nodded with a half-annoyed, half-endearing smile.

"He's grisha too. A few years younger, so he's still at school. His name's Adrik."

"Is he a Squaller too?" 

Nadia confirmed that he was, because of course, the little rat had to copy everything about his older sister.

Alina laughed at that.

"The little girl seems very happy for someone who's about to get into a fight?" were the words with which Botkin received her.

Alina fought back the need to recoil. The only time she had won so far had been against Zoya, …if one could consider that a win given what happened right after.

"Maybe I'll be lucky today." she beamed at him.

Botkin seemed almost surprised.

"Positivity is fine, little girl, but you need to focus during a fight. But first." he clapped his hands twice, immediately getting all the attention. "Run around the lake. Twice. The last one to get back here will help the stable hands for the rest of the day."

Alina really ran like never before that day.

Her side hurt, and she almost felt like she wasn't getting enough air; but after the first half, her legs didn't burn so much anymore, and she felt almost as good as she did when walking.

"Damn, Starkov." she turned her head to see that Michail, a heartrender with a hard-shaped face and kind, green eyes, was easily keeping up with her. "When did you get this fast?"

"Practice." she said, a little breathless but feeling nice with the cold air slapping against her face. "Besides, I really don't wanna end up in the stables."

He laughed at that.

"That makes two of us. I hate those animals."

Alina frowned. She just didn't wanna clean up their shit, but other than that, she could find nothing wrong with horses.

"Why?"

"Those long faces," he said, gesturing over his own. "they're scary."

"You're scared of horses?!" she asked, disbelieving. 

"Why don't you yell it a little louder?" he asked, looking around at the disperse group, but he was smirking. They weren't at the front, but they weren't slagging at the back either.

"Sorry." she leaned in. "I'll keep your secret if you help me not to be the last."

"I don't think you need my help," he laughed. "but sure."

She got knocked down on her ass by a short Inferni woman with dark blonde hair, but Alina laughed it off, hiding her embarrassment, and stretched out a hand. The Inferni rose an eyebrow and then helped her up.

"Thanks." she told her, dusting off the back of her kefta.

"For kicking your ass?"

"Hey, I think I did learn a thing or two." she winked. "Next time I'll be ready."

"Oh, so you want a rematch?" the woman asked, amused, as she crossed her arms over her chest. 

"If you're up for it." Alina shrugged.

"Deal." they shook hands. "But it'll have to wait until we're done with him." she said, nodding towards Botkin, who was busy making rounds, watching the others. "I'm Natasha, by the way."

"Alina."

"Oh, I know. Everyone knows." she smiled once more before retreating to a small group of Inferni that had reunited by a corner.

As she passed by the lake in her usual route to Baghra's hut, Alina got startled by the damage she had done to the perfectly green grass. Gardeners were still at work getting rid of the black mass she had left in her path, going so far as to dig into the earth. They saw her passing and glanced up, some frightened, others definitely not amused.

"I am so sorry." she whispered frantically, before hurrying her steps.

"Don't let the heat out!" was all the greeting she got from the ancient woman.

Alina closed the door and hurried to the chair that awaited her. She was smiling.

"I don't think that will be a problem." she said, proud of herself.

She scoffed. "So I have heard. Show me." she said, hitting her in the arm with her cane.

"Ouch!"

With a nasty frown, Alina placed her palms in front of the others and called the light that she had rejected for so long. So eager to answer, her power rushed through and out of her, and she was almost puzzled by its intensity. She focused on keeping the orb small.

"Uh. Well, it took you long enough."

"A 'Congratulations' would be nice."

She got hit again. Her light wavered and then solidified again.

"Congratulations? What? Do you want a parade thrown in your honour as well? For what? Doing what you were supposed to do your entire life? Shut up and expand the orb. Make it encompass the entire place."

With deep breaths, both to concentrate and control her anger, Alina steadily expanded her light, making it fill the hut.

"Bend it to its shape."

Carefully, she tried to do as she was told.

"You were right, about being held back." she uttered as she tried to shape her light to blend in with the walls.

"I know." the woman said, petulant. "Now call it back and repeat until there is no effort to it."

Alina tried, and tried again, but as eager as her power was to explode, her body was eager for a long, long nap. There had been so much repression, so much denial for so many years, that it was as if the light wanted to just explode out of her body and consume it all.

It scared her a little, but she focused.

The Darkling had told her she was magnificent, Alina remembered, and he had made it sound like she was capable of anything.

The way his grey eyes shone with such intensity, like he wanted to engulf her into his arms and have her all to his own, the way in which his hand felt against hers, or how just even being next to him made her want to lean into and over him like a lazy, overly clingy cat. 

She'd lay on top of him all day if she could.

Alina wondered what would've happened if Genya hadn't arrived at the moment she did. Would The Darkling had kissed her? What would his lips taste like? How would his beard feel against her skin? Just exactly how good was he with his tongue?

Alina blushed. The light flickered, as if excited at the mere idea of the man.

She had kissed a few people before, but him, there was something about him that told her that if he should kiss her only once, she'd spend the rest of her life running after the very same sensation and more.

"Dreaming about your dark prince again?"

She looked at Baghra.

"What?" looking around, she noticed that her light had expanded farther than the hut and she was glowing.

Alina snapped her hands, and everything was dark again. Her fingers tingled with power, her eyelids closed with exhaustion.

"I-I wasn't-" she blinked rapidly, trying to adjust to the new environment.

"Stupid, stupid girl. You need to focus on your task."

"I'd concentrate better if I wasn't being hit every five min-OUCH!"

"Do not make excuses with me. You are lazy, easily distracted, you do not know what you are getting yourse-"

"You know, for someone who's supposed to be such a great teacher, I've still got to see some actual teaching." Alina snapped. "All you do is yell at me, hit me and belittle me; yet one conversation with The General I can finally summon." the brunette spat, each word more angrier than the previous one. "So don't try to blame me for your shortcomings."

Baghra was silent, nostrils flaring. When it looked like she might raise her cane and hit Alina right in the head with it, she opened her thin lips instead:

"Out." she uttered, almost inaudible. "Out! And do not come back!"

"Gladly!"

Alina stood up and marched for the door, her steps almost as loud as the insults the old woman was throwing after her.

"Stupid girl! Unconscious! Just another pawn of his! You never learn! Lazy! Stupid! Blind!"

 It was a good thing the old crone couldn't see the tears of frustration and shame in her eyes.

She was on her way back to the Little Palace, trying to decide if she should bathe or go to the library first.

Baghra’s words still rang in her head.

Maybe, if she was quick, really quick with her bath,...but then again, she was getting too used to such a luxury, that once in there it was quite difficult to leave unless the water turned cold.

But if she went to the library, she’d be there until the words blurred and her eyes burned.

On the other hand, there were other grisha in the library, and she couldn’t afford to walk in there smelling like-

"Alina?"

General Kirigan's smooth voice had her turning on her heels, hand still massaging the spot on her arm Baghra's cane had so harshly landed. She had managed to hold back the tears, but the woman's word still stung.

"Moi Soverennyi." She greeted but forgot to bow.

He looked at her arm.

"How was your lesson?"

"I spent months with her and nothing; five minutes with you and I can summon." She basically spat, still bitter at Baghra's harsh words. "I think that speaks for itself."

He smiled, almost.

"Give the old woman some credit. She is good at what she does."

"Terrorizing isn't teaching." she replied, and then, with her head high, added: "She didn't get me to summon."

"No." The Darkling agreed, taking a step towards her. All engulfed in his black cloak, he almost seemed to float. "You did it. It was all you." He said it with such reverence that her breath became shallow.

She didn't look away from his eyes. The storms swirling in there were magnetic. There was so much going on in there at the moment, yet it all sped up through those grey orbs so fast she couldn't make sense of it.

"Why don't you teach me?" The words slipped from her tongue before she could think better of it.

He rose an eyebrow, taking another predatory step towards her.

"I serve the King. I run an entire army. I do not have the time to train everyone personally, nor would I want anyone to think they are favoured above others." 

He was so close to her now, she had to crane her neck to look up.

"You once said there was no one else like us; who could be a better teacher?"

In truth, she also wanted to see him more often. Glimpses as he passed through the Little Palace or left Os Alta, and the occasional conversation weren't enough for her.

"You flatter me, Miss Starkov."

"I only state my opinion." she took a step, shortening the distance, like he was a magnet calling for her.

Mirth shone in his eyes. It made her smile. 

"I will be going away for a few weeks." At this, her smile fell, and his formed as he tilted her chin up with his gloved fingers.

Alina stared up into his eyes, dark with something.

"I'll miss you." She whispered, foolishly, without thought. 

"Will you?" He asked, almost perplexed for a moment.

She found herself nodding.

"I know we don't get much chance to talk, but I like talking to you." She confessed, a knot in her throat. "You understand all,...this." she flickered her fingers and a tiny orb of light formed above her hand.

His eyes followed suit, almost fascinated, like he still couldn't quite believe her power was real. And when he looked at her, it was like he couldn't believe she was real.

His hand rose and shadows swallowed her light. Alina watched them dance, entranced by his power, and noticed it taking shape.

"For you." The Darkling said, handing her a black rose, from the base of its steam to the very last petal. "To remember me by while I am gone."

Disbelieving, she reached out and gasped as she touched the shadow. There was a little bit of gold in there, her own power hidden within, shimmering weakly here and there.

"I don't have anything to give you." She said, lamenting.

He leaned down, his beard rough against her soft cheek.

"Trust me, Alina," he whispered, her name on his lips against her ear making her tremble. "I could not forget you if I tried."

There was the whisper of a kiss against her cheek that seemed to linger for the longest moment, …and then he was leaving, cloak flipping behind him as he left the sun Summoner holding onto a small piece of shadow and a piece of her heart gone with him.

Click here for chapter Five

[topsytervy]

Not The Right Time ~ JJ Maybank

Blurb: JJ has a thing for you. Unfortunatley, it just isn't the right time.

Word count: 1,929 (give or take. did some last minute editing)

Warnings: mention of cheating, drinking, drug use (weed), swearing, not proofread so probably spelling mistakes, I think that's it.

Quick rundown because I have more of these than usual cause this one is slightly more descriptive of the reader (aka you): s/c = skin color, e/c = eye color, h/l = hair length, h/c = hair color, h/t = hair type (curly, straight, etc...)

Me somehow breaking out of my Rafe phase for a minute to write something JJ related? Yes, I am just as surprised as you are.

~~~~~~

JJ lounged in the hammock in the backyard, drinking his third beer of the night with a book next to him. This was a routine for him at this point. While you were out with your boyfriend, he went into the backyard to drink away his sorrows and stayed up until you got home to make sure you actually got home.

The nights when you texted him that you wouldn't be coming home, opting to stay at your boyfriends instead, were the worst for him.

If you asked JJ, your boyfriend was an asshole. He never liked him and probably never would. However, you were his best friend and roommate since you both graduated from high school so whatever made you happy was fine by him.

It just sucked that he wasn't the one who made you happy the way your boyfriend did.

JJ often found himself mesmerized by your beauty. Your beautiful (s/c) skin and (e/c) eyes often entranced him which usually caused you to nudge him.

"You good?" You'd ask.

"Absolutely peachy." He'd grin.

After all, How could he not be peachy with you around?

He noticed the way you'd play with your (h/l) (h/c) (h/t) hair mindlessly when you'd be focused on a movie or the way you picked at the skin around your nails when you got nervous.

JJ sighed as he crushed his now empty beer can and reached for another that sat in the cooler next to the hammock.

"Woe is me," he whispered, popping the tab of the new can.

He brought the can to his lips but pulled it away when he heard the front door open and close which caused a confused expression to cross his face.

He didn't hear a car pull up and drop you off like usual since your boyfriend often picked you up.

"Y/N!" He called, hoping that you'd hear him and that it was actually you and not an intruder.

He grew quiet as he heard faint footsteps from inside and the sliding glass door slide open.

"Yeah, it's me." You answered.

Your voice was barely above a whisper which caused JJ to turn his head to face you.

"Come join me for a drink." He waved you over, not being able to make out your face in the darkness.

You shuffled closer to JJ and the faint glow from the solar lights you guys had casted upon your face. JJs face dropped at the sight of yours.

"Oh my god. Y/N," JJ immediately dropped his can on the ground.

The contents spilled onto the grass as he took in your appearance.

You eyes were red from crying, black smudges of mascara on your face and your nose was slightly red, more than likely from the irritation of you constantly wiping it on your sleeve.

"What happened sweetheart?" He asked as he pulled you into the hammock.

"He's been cheating on me." You whispered, your voice hoarse as you laid on him.

He took in a sharp breath and his arms tightened around you. "How do you know?"

"He left his phone at the table when he went to the bathroom and I answered it. Before I could say anything a woman's voice came through and said hey baby. When I suggested she had the wrong number since this was my boyfriends phone, she said no this is Brett's number and that's when I knew."

JJ rubbed your back and kissed the top of your head.

"I am so sorry Y/N." He whispered.

You shrugged, feeling numb.

It was quiet for a few minutes before you noticed the book next to him. "Whatcha reading?"

JJ took an arm from around you and grabbed his book.

"A book of Edgar Allan Poe's works." He answered.

"Can you read to me?" 

JJ nodded as he opened the book. "Want me to start from the beginning?" 

"You can if you want." 

JJ flipped to the first page. "The Cask of Amontillado." He began as you made yourself comfortable.

After half an hour, JJ stopped and looked at you. Your eyes were closed and your mouth was slightly open. JJ smiled as he made himself comfortable in the hammock. You looked so peaceful and he wasn't about to risk waking you up just to try to get you in your bed. 

He wrapped his arms around you and closed his eyes, letting sleep take over.

******

The next morning, you woke up with a small headache and placed your head in your hands.

"Hey, I made you scrambled eggs with cheese and those ham cubes you like along with some bacon." 

Your head turned towards the voice and you saw JJ walking over with two plates of food, setting them on the patio table that was placed a few feet away from the hammock. 

JJ walked back inside as you stood up and walked over to your breakfast. You stretched as JJ came back with a bottle of apple juice for you and a beer for himself, pulling out his chair before sitting down.

"I was thinking since neither of us work today, we could steal the HMS Pogue from John B and go out on the marsh. Just the two of us. smoke some weed, drink some beer. You know, the usual." The blonde suggested, popping a piece of bacon into his mouth as he did. "Hell, maybe even just stay out there the entire night. We'll pack plenty of food.“ 

You stayed quiet and forked some eggs into your mouth before reaching for your apple juice, attempting to open it. After a few unsuccessful attempts, JJ held out his hand and you gave the bottle to him. He opened it with ease and gave you the bottle back. You took a drink before returning to your food.

Technically, he wouldn't be taking the pogue without John B's permission. He had talked to John B about taking it after a call this morning, telling him what had happened. John B had said the boat was all his for the day and all JJ had to do was to let him know when JJ was planning on confronting Brett so he could get a few punches in.

"So…me, you, and the Pogue out on the marsh?" JJ asked again.

You sighed. " I don't know, J. "

"Okay, I know that last night was rough and I'm 100% sure Brett will get what's coming to him, but today is about making you feel better and I know theres nothing you like more than chilling in the middle of the marsh with a joint in one hand and a beer in the other, maybe some swimming beforehand." He saw you thinking about it and knew you were leaning towards yes so he drove it home. "Plus you like sleeping under the stars and you're always napping on the boat. Why not combine them?" 

You bit your lip, the idea tantalizing.

You nodded. "Okay but don't be all mad cause I'm all mopey." 

"I won't. I'll be fishing while getting high with my best friend." 

" I thought JB was your best friend?" You smirked.

JJ placed a finger to his lips and sent you a wink. "Shh. Our little secret." 

****

You sat on the blanket-covered floor of the HMS Pogue, a joint being passed between you and JJ as you sipped on a beer and ate the abundance of food JJ had brought with.

It was hours later, darkness had fallen and the stars had come out.  JJ had stopped at The Wreck to order a shit ton of food before you took the Pogue out and paid for it all despite you offering to pitch in for half.

"Oh no no no. Rule #1 of friends supporting a friend whos been broken up with: the one who has gone through the break-up doesnt pay for anything the day after."

"Oh yeah? Who made that dumbass rule Maybank?" You crossed your arms, eyebrows raised.

"Uh, I will have you know JJ Maybanks Rules To Help A Friend Through Heartbreak is a number one best seller." JJ shot qt you.

"Oh yeah. I bet that that fake ass book is raking in all the fake ass dough and your signing plenty of fake ass boobs at your fake ass book signing." You nodded.

"Actually, the fake ass bookstore that is holding my fake ass book signing doesn't allow boob autographs. Something about it being inappropriate apparently." He grinned.

You took a bite of your sandwich as you passed the joint to JJ. 

"You know what JJ?"

He hummed in response as he took a hit off the joint.

"This was really nice and I had a really great time today." You grinned.

JJ smiled, happy that the smile was back on your face. " I'm really glad Y/N/N. You know you deserve this, right?" 

You shrugged, taking a sip of your beer before taking the joint back from the blonde.

"I'm serious, Y/N. You deserve this and way more. You deserve someone who can give you everything you need and want." JJ scooted closer to you.

"If I deserve everything like you say I do, J, then why wasn't I good enough for Brett." you whispered.

JJ took the joint from your hand and placed it in the ashtray he had set on the floor before moving next to you and wrapping his arm around your shoulders, pulling your body into his side.

"It's not that you weren't good enough for Brett, Brett wasn't good enough for you. He's a damn fool for letting you go. I've heard Kooks like Topper talking about how bad they want to date you. If a Kook wants to date you, a pogue who hangs out with me who every Kook hates, that means you're a pretty remarkable person." JJ told you.

You felt yourself smile at his words. "You always know what to say, J. Sometimes, I wonder why you haven't used that intelligent brain of yours to woo yourself a girIfriend."

 JJ scoffed at your words.

"I'm serious JJ. You are so much smarter than you think you are. Both streetwise and bookwise. You read me Edgar Allan Poe last night as if it was your first language and didn't even stop to ask me what any words meant like you usually do around the others. You shouldn't hide your smarts, J. Smart you is way sexier than dumb you." JJ felt himself blush and you ruffled his hair as you turned your body to face his. "I wish you let everyone else see the JJ Maybank I see."

JJ sighed. "I don't woo any girls with my words cause it's either not the right time or not the right girl." 

"Come on JJ. You're 20 years old and you mean to tell you haven't met one girl you didn't want to be in a long term relationship with?" You asked through a mouthful of sandwich, hand covering your mouth.

"I never said that." 

your eyes widened as you swallowed your food and took a swig from your beer. "You like someone right now!" JJ rolled his eyes. " Oh my God. Maybank, spill! What's stopping you from going after her?"

JJ took the blunt from the ashtray and took a long slow drag before turning his blue eyes onto your e/c ones. "Like I said, not the right time. I have to wait until I think she's ready for a relationship."

~~~~~~ 

[chrisdiels-babygirl]

It's All In Your Head Baby

This is my original writing you do not have permission to copy it. Changing the boy or slightly changing details is still plagiarism. If I find out that you've copied my writing I will not hesitate to publicly shame you and report your sorry ass✌🏼😗

(Bold writing is her anxiety thoughts, just so everyone knows)

✨Trigger Warning- talking about anxiety✨

You know what the funny thing is, is that when Chris' and I had started dating I had told him that I had anxiety, he looked at me and said it wasn't a problem because he still liked me, but I don't think Chris realized how big a problem my anxiety was going to be until lately, I had really been feeling the affects of my anxiety lately, I couldn't stop myself from thinking that the boys secretly hated me and found me annoying, that they were only friends with me because they felt sorry for me, that Chris secretly hated and found me annoying too, that he knew he could do better than me and he was just waiting for a hotter girl to come along so he could dump me. I know I should be reminding myself that all five of the boys love me no matter what and Chris would never replace me, but thats the cruel part about anxiety it makes you doubt yourself and second guess everything that you know is true.

I decided to try to maybe sleep it off, maybe when I woke up my anxiety would have subsided. Just as I layed down and fluttered my eyes closed I heard footsteps entering the bedroom "Qué estás haciendo" Chris asked, I gently opened my eyes "I was gonna take a nap" he looked at me with his adorable big brown eyes that I loved "did you forget you said you were coming with me to the party for work tonight? If you're not feeling well you should stay home though" he softly uttered as he looked into my eyes. I shot up out of the bed "no no I'll go, just give me a second to get ready" I said as I started to look through the closet, as Chris walked back out I sarcastically thought to myself, great you couldn't even remember his work function tonight, he probably thinks you're a great girlfriend, that voice in my head was mocking me, it was feeding on my insecurities and I knew that but I couldn't stop myself from thinking those thoughts. I didnt even really make that much of an effort tonight, I didn't really wanna get dressed up to sit in a room full of women who were hotter than me and they didn't even have to try, so I just put on the first dress I could find, put some make up on, put some heels on and grabbed my clutch. As I walked out of the bedroom Christopher's eyes scanned me over, a lazy smile stretched across his face "Te ves hermosa como siempre mi amor" he said walking towards me, he's lying, I did my best to give him a smile as I rushed to get my coat before he could get to me "we're going to be late, come on, let's go" I said rushing out the door.

We were in the car on our way to the event, Chris had placed his hand on my thigh like he usually did when he was driving, problem is he visibly noticed me recoil when he placed his hand there, the thing is I was doing what I usually did, pushing him away before he got the chance to hurt me, because in my head I felt like if I pushed him away it'll hurt less when he inevitably leaves me, he carefully pulled his hand off my thigh and put it back on the steering wheel "nena is everything alright" he quickly glanced at me with worry in his eyes, "yes I'm fine" no you're not, I gave him a weak smile. As we walked inside the venue we saw the rest of the boys sitting at our table, as we got closer the boys stood up to greet us, I quickly turned to Chris "I'm gonna go to the bar, I'll be back" I said rushing off in the direction of the bar. I could see Chris and the guys as they talked glancing over here every now and again they're probably talking about how annoying you are, Zabdiel made his way over to me at the bar, he carefully sat down in the seat next to me "do you wanna talk about it" he softly spoke as studied my face he doesn't really care "talk about what, there's nothing to discuss" he audibly sighed "come on y/n, Chris said you've been really distant with him the past week, you wont let him touch you or kiss you and you've been ignoring the rest of us too, I mean come on I thought we were best friends and best friends tell each other everything" he had a pleading look in his eye he's not really your best friend, he doesn't really care.

Later that night as we walked inside the apartment Chris stopped in the middle of the living room " do you not love me anymore?" I whirled around "what" I looked at him with disbelief in my eyes "do you not love me anymore nena? Because lately you barely talk to me, you wont let me touch you, I mean for god sake you hardly even look at me anymore, so if you don't love me anymore I'd really appreciate it if you'd tell me instead of ignoring me" he exsasperated. How do I even begin to tell the man that I love that my mind has been deceiving me, convincing me that he and the rest of the guys secretly hate me "of course I still love you, how could you think I don't? but i cant tell you you're going to think I'm being rediculous" I weakly whispered, he grabbed my face with both his hands "look at me, look at me nena, I wont think you're rediculous, I just need you to tell me what the problem is so I can fix it" he desperately pleaded looking into my eyes while worry flooded his, I turned away from him crossing my arms across my chest "I just- I just feel like lately that I'm a burden to you and the rest of the boys,that you don't really care about me, that you don't really love me, that as soon as you get the chance to leave me for someone hotter you will, so I've been pushing you away because in my head it'll make it hurt less when you decide to leave me" I ranted, the room flooded with silence, I quickly turned around only to see that Chris stood there with tears brimming his eyes "how could you think that nena, I love you, I love you so fucking much, all I've wanted to do for the past week is hug you, kiss you and love you, but I just felt like you didn't want me around" he whispered as his voice cracked and he sniffled, I suddenly started to cry also "Chris I could never stop loving you, you're one of the best parts of my day. Its just lately my anxiety has been making me doubt everything, like when you say you love me or when you say I look beautiful" his face softened even more if that was possible as he walked over, holding my face with his hands again, resting his forehead against mine "thats all in your head baby, your mind is lying to you, I love you so fucking much and I'm gonna keep reminding you and showing you if thats what it takes for you to believe me, te quiero mucho bebé" he softly muttered the last part as he leaned in further to press his plump lips against mine, I could feel all the passion, love and yearning Chris had for me displayed in this one kiss, the last week I had been feeling so crappy, who knew that all I needed was to talk to Chris and get a kiss from him to start feeling better. We spent the remainder of the evening cuddled up while, Netflix playing in the background as white noise, Chris occasionally kissed me, while he continuously reminded me of all the things he loved about me, while I also reminded him of all the things that made me fall in love with him.

[bobohunn]

— summary : It was tough for you to trust and open up to people, after all you've been through. When you finally let your walls down, Chanyeol left you hanging. (part 1 of 2)

— pairings : chanyeol x reader

— genre : angst, fluff

— warnings : mentions of anxiety, alcohol, bullying, & gaslighting, hints of sexual assault & harassment, description of anxiety & panic attacks.

— word count : 3.9k words (part 1)

— author's words : hi!!! I'm not really good with titles so this goes untitled for now 😅 I'll add the title when I post the 2nd part 💛 this is not proofread and edited yet pls forgive me. I'd really appreciate it if you tell me your thoughts on this! ☺️

It was a year ago today. The day when you were supposed to wake up with a smile, hearing your family’s thumping steps on the wooden floor on the way to your room. The day when your younger sister was supposed to be running towards you to attack you with kisses, your mom holding out a cake that says ‘happy birthday’, and your father following closely behind them, singing the happy birthday song with his awfully hoarse morning voice, just like the annual tradition. Rather, you woke up to the loud and thunderous knocks on your bedroom door, along with what you recognized as your father’s voice. And the second you turned the lock on the knob, the door flew and a hand met your right cheek.

You were scared, but you weren’t sure what you were scared for. Sure your dad looked scary, his face was blood red, his breathing uneven, and his hands clenched into fists, but you didn’t know what he was acting scary for. You held your cheek, trying to ease up the stinging sensation that lingered. 

“D-dad?”, you managed to stutter out. Your father shut his eyes close and sighed. 

You looked away and noticed your mom and your sister on the wooden staircase behind your dad. Your mom was holding her face in her hands, and your sister was rubbing her back. Only then did you realize that they were both crying.

“M-mom? S-stacy? W-what’s going o-on?”, you choked out, feeling the hot tears that were running down your face.

It was silent again, and you hated it. The silence was deafening and you swore you almost heard the cells in your brain die. You always hated situations like this, it made you feel so anxious and you were about to throw up.

“D-dad, M-mom what’s happening w-why are y–”

“You don’t have to call me dad anymore,” your dad cut you off, and you heard your mom cry louder.

“D-dad w-will you please at least t-tell me what’s going on?”, you said in between sobs, “please?”

Your dad let out another loud sigh, and you noticed his eyes getting misty. “Stacy, give me your phone. Your sister wants to know why, so I’ll show her why”, he said in a firm tone.

Stacy stood up from the stairs and took out the phone from her pocket. She handed it over to your dad, avoiding his gaze including yours. You were practically begging for her to look at you with your eyes while your dad was fumbling with the gadget, but she stood behind him, staring at the floor with her hair covering her face.

Your father handed to you the phone, showing a paused video on the screen. You pressed play, and turned the volume up. You were puzzled to say the least. The video had poor lighting but when the light source hit the surface of a very familiar face in the frame, you dropped the phone, leaving a small crack on the lower left part of the screen.

Your brain tried to put the pieces of information it recently gathered together, but you were about to pass out. Unconsciously shaking, you stumbled on your feet, and dropped to the floor. That was the last thing you remembered before your sight blacked out.

Your life today is a little bit different to how it was a year ago, yet it was still sort of the same. You moved to a different town, a different school, a different environment. It isn’t much worse now, but some people would still look at you and gossip as you pass by the same. Others don’t even stab you in the back, they hit you in the front now.

You moved with your family in the hopes of forgetting everything and starting anew, but unfortunately the news reached your new home too. Your parents insisted that you move places again when people in your school started talking, but you hated the feeling of being an inconvenience. So you did your best to heal and learn how to not a give a fuck to what others say, even if it burnt you out on most days.

“It’s okay, Mom. I’ll be alright, they’re not hurting me anyway,” you said in the softest voice.

“Are you sure? We can just move out of the country, baby. It’s best that we just go, hmm?” she held your hands in one, and caressed your face in the other.

“Yeah. We should just move if you’re uncomfortable here, my love,” your dad added as he wrapped an arm around your shoulders.

“Then we’d have to spend money again. I know you guys had a hard time adjusting as well, especially Stacy,” you fumbled with the fabric of your shorts, “I’m okay, really.”

But even though you’ve learnt to not give a shit and shrug off what bullshit other people— who don’t even know you, by the way— say anymore over the past months, there are still times when you have to endure how painful the words you overhear from conversations of people in your school are. And when you couldn’t, you’d have to run back to your only safe place in school, the comfort room at the back of the school library to turn into a ball and cry. On some days when you think you’re all better and don’t give a fuck anymore, you hear words you tried so hard to delete from your system, and it makes you want to throw up again.

You hate whoever did this to you. However, over the process of healing, you realized that you hate those people who try to act nice in front of you, act like they care for you, act like they support you, but actually talk rotten behind you more. And you hate people who try to control you into thinking that you are the one to blame, the most, because there are times that their words sting too much you begin to doubt yourself again after trying so hard to convince yourself that you were never at fault.

xx

It’s the first day of the semestral break, and you couldn’t be more happy and relieved to be far from society. You don’t have to do anything but lie down in your comfy bed, and binge watch your favorite shows all day. You can read books you hoarded in the past but never really touched after, as well!

“Y/N! Stacy! Come here, give these apples to our new neighbors!” your mom shouted from the kitchen.

You and your sister, Stacy peeked out of your bedrooms at the same time, and when your eyes met you both sighed. 

“I was watching Stranger Things, I was in the good part!”, you whined.

“I was reading a good fic on Tumblr as well! I was in the climax of the story!”, Stacy stomped her feet playfully and you both giggled.

“Y/N! Stacy! Did you hear me?” your Mom shouted again, which made you and Stacy instinctively run down the stairs.

xx

“Good afternoon Mister– uhmm?”, Stacy said to the man sitting on the balcony outside the house your mom sent you to for a quick mission.

“Park. Mr. Park,” the grown man smiled.

“Oh, nice to meet you Mr. Park! We’re from the house next to yours. We heard you just moved in, so my mom wanted you to have this!” Stacy beamed at him, while you stood behind her quietly.

“Oh I see! What are your names? You should come in! We had a feast for lunch, you should help us finish the food!” Mr. Park said while turning the knob of the front door.

“I’m Stacy, this is my older sister Y/n. My mom’s name is Rachel, and my dad’s is Samuel”, she said as she took off her sneakers.

“How old are you guys? I have a son who’s in the 11th grade, and a daughter who’s gonna be in her 2nd year in university.”

“I’m in 11th grade as well, Stacy is in 9th. We’re in Jungwon Highschool”, you said as you took off your jacket

“You should meet my son then! He’s transferring to Jungwon! But he’s not here now, he took the dog out on a walk in the park”, he said while grabbing plates from the kitchen.

After eating a few sweet fruits, you and your sister headed back home with two full plates of side dishes Mr. Park’s family offered. You passed by a tall unfamiliar guy carrying a black dog on the way back, and you figured maybe he was Mr. Park’s son.

xx

It’s the first day of the spring semester, the weather's been really better the past few days and you couldn’t be any happier because it means you don’t have to wear a heavy coat to school anymore.

While walking to the bus stop, you saw a familiar guy crouching down to pet a kitten.

Cute

He picked the cat up and moved it to a spot away from the pavement onto the bushes, probably for its safety. The moment he turned to your direction, you realized he was the same guy who you passed by once, on the way home from your new neighbor’s house. He was wearing the same uniform as you, and there you confirmed he really was the Parks’ son.

The bell rang and your class adviser went into the classroom. He was with the same guy you encountered earlier, announcing that your class has a new student to welcome.

“My name is Park Chanyeol. Please take care of me”, the guy said as he smiled and bowed down. He took the empty seat in front of you and settled down.

xx

“Pass your quizlets to the president after lunch. Late submissions will have deductions. Is that clear, class?” the 4th period teacher announced as she walked out the room.

The chime rang on the school speakers, and the lunch break started. All your classmates darted out the room, while you stayed in your seat, resting your head on the desk to take a nap like usual. Except, this time you aren’t left alone in the room. Chanyeol stayed, seemingly finishing the quizlet the teacher gave.

“Excuse me, can I borrow your eraser?” He asked, knocking on your desk to get your attention.

“Ah, sure. Here,” you pass him the black piece of soft rubber from your pencil case.

“Didn’t know they sell black ones. I should get myself one like this too. I actually hate when the white ones get dirty,” he rambled on while erasing whatever he had to erase and gave it back to you. You nod sheepishly as a response.

“I’m Chanyeol. What’s your name?” he pursed his lips while waiting for you to answer.

“I’m y/n. I actually live next to you,” you smile, scratching your nape.

Chanyeol was saying something but you weren’t really listening. Not when you heard some girls at the back door say, “what is she doing? Is she flirting with him?” “I seriously can’t believe her, after all that happened to her she has the guts to flirt with boys again?” “Maybe she thinks she can bait the new guy because he’s clueless” “and attractive, too”

You just smiled at him, and rested your head back down again, wearing earphones this time to block out whatever conversations you didn’t have to hear.

xx

You were sitting on the bench outside your go-to place, the comfort room at the back of the school library, watching whatever random videos youtube recommended in the home section. A video of a band doing a cover of some other band’s song came up, and you suddenly heard someone clear their throat from behind you which made you jump a little bit from your seat.

“So, are you into bands?” Chanyeol asked as he sat beside you on the bench.

If you were to be really honest, you grew scared of meeting people through the past year. You really hate it when people bring up things which they are not in the place to talk about. You’d tell them if you wanted them to know, and if you wouldn’t then they just have to accept and respect it, not be a total nosy ass. And unfortunately, everyone who tried to talk to you in this school brought up things you wished they didn’t. It made you feel like they’re only talking to you to know the tea. So you shut them out immediately, afraid to be hurt by them again if you get attached to them.

Which is why you struggled to let out a response to Chanyeol’s curiosity.

Why does he want to know about that? What will he do with that information? What if he uses it against me in the future? I should be careful with what I say, I might give out too much information.

All sorts of thoughts, running in your mind right now.

“Are you okay?” he asked when he realized you were only staring with a surprised expression at him, “is something wrong?”

“U-uhm, yeah. And, n-no. I’m s-sorry,” you looked away, keeping your phone in your pocket.

Chanyeol chuckled, “why are you getting flustered? I don’t bite!”

“I-I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to,” you purse your lips.

“You’re a shy one, aren’t you? Don’t worry! I’m good at making people open up to me” he said as he placed an arm around your shoulder, to which you flinched at.

And Chanyeol was right, he was good at making people open up to him indeed. He made you feel at ease with his jokes, but more than that, you felt safe at how he doesn’t pressure you to talk about yourself, he just waits for you to willingly share things with him. He just keeps on going on and on about what he wants to say, but he listens attentively the second you open your lips to talk.

"Oh how I love animals so much! I have a dog, his name is Toben but he doesn't listen to me. So i kinda hate him" he said enthusiastically.

"I think I've seen you once with him, the black one?" you recalled.

"Yes that's him! I used to have a cat too but he ran away from home. His name was Bach"

"I actually have a hamster. Her name is Lilie. You should meet her she's a total fluff ball" you said as you took your phone out and show him a picture of your syrian hamster.

"Oh my god she's so cute!" his eyes grew wider than it originally is.

You chuckled, "You must really like pets that much."

"Oh trust me, I even brought a rat home. My mom scolded me so much," and it's you who has wide eyes now.

You grew close to Chanyeol in a span of a few days. You would walk to school and walk home together with him almost everyday. You learned a lot of things about him, while he was also able to slowly make you open up to him. The both of you would ramble about random things while doing homework or eating dinner at each other’s house, but he never crossed the borderline and asked you about your past. You couldn’t be more grateful that you found a friend like him. It’s the bare minimum, but it’s important to you and no one really does it like that anymore, not for you at least.

“What’s the square root of 441?” He asked, biting the tip of the pen he was holding.

“21, I think? Let me check,” you said as you took out the calculator in your backpack.

“It’s okay I got it aaaand— Wow! You’re right!” He jumped out of his seat and ruffled his fluffy brown hair in amusement. You chuckled and took a sip from the tea his mom made for you.

“You’re amazing, how do you know that? Did you just mentally solve that?” He sat back down again.

“Of course not. I liked maths so much as a kid, I memorized the perfect squares at some point.” you mumbled, redirecting your focus back to the homework in front of you.

“In many years of living, I never once met someone who memorized perfect squares” Chanyeol said as he held his face in his big hands.

“Now you did”

He chuckled, “Yeah, memorable. Anyway, are you free this friday?”

You bit your lip in sudden anxiety, “I-i don’t know. N-not sure. Why?”

“Some of our classmates are going to a party, and they invited me,” he hesitated a little before he continued, “I just wondered if you wanted to come? With me?”

You feel your heart beat faster, “No, sorry. I think I’ll be helping my dad on Friday.”

“Oh it’s okay. Don’t worry about it,” whispered Chanyeol, looking back down to his homework.

Friday came, and you thought it was weird to walk home alone for the first time. You got used to chatting with Chanyeol while on the way home, and now it was completely silent. When you got home, you threw yourself to your bed. You decided to get your laptop and binge watch another series on netflix.

It was around 7:30 pm when your phone rang. You looked at the caller ID and picked up hesitantly when you realized it was Chanyeol’s. “Why would he call so suddenly though?” you whispered to yourself.

“Chanyeol?” You said as you bring the phone up to your ear.

“hey Y/N! What’s up?” he chirped weirdly, probably drunk.

“Nothing much. Are you drunk?”

“I’m wasted. They tricked me, they said it was juice. They tricked me, y/n!” you cringed at how much he was slurring his words. It was obvious that alcohol was already in control of his system.

“How are you gonna get home?”

“I don’t know. Everyone is drunk here and–” he hiccuped, “they’re all nasty. I wanna go home”

You paused for a bit, checking the time on your laptop. “Turn on your location and stay there. I’ll pick you up”

Chanyeol nodded and hummed from the other line. You quickly ended the call to run to your closet to grab a jacket, and leave the house.

You didn’t know if you were dumb or stupid, but you were sure you were either. 

Why would you suggest picking him up? From a house party? Which you avoided so much with all your might?

When you reached the house that showed up on Chanyeol’s location— which took you 30 minutes to find, you had to pat yourself on your shoulders and remind yourself that you were doing it for a friend, and if you were just gonna walk away, this friend might get in trouble. You inhaled deeply before entering, a pool of evidently alcohol intoxicated bodies welcoming you.

It took you only a few seconds to spot Chanyeol, the only giant in the room. But it took you a few minutes to get to him because as he said, the crowd was pretty nasty.

“Alright time to go home now big buddy, let’s go” you tapped Chanyeol on his forearms, bracing yourself in case he’d stumble and fall.

“Goodbye my friends!” Chanyeol screamed over the booming music from the speakers. “You’re leaving already?” a familiar voice replied, and you realized it was one of your classmates, Max.

You only nodded at him after flashing a small smile. “Are you seriously going Chan? It’s too early! We haven’t been to the fun part yet!” Max said before taking a sip of whatever alcohol from his red cup.

“What fun part? I think I’m just gonna go home, Max” Chanyeol replied, seemingly sobering up a little.

“Oh you know, the fun part! When all the chics get wasted!” your mind was getting hazy at what you heard, and you nearly lost your balance. Your grip on Chanyeol’s sweater got tighter, which made him look at you.

But he didn’t answer Max, instead he turned away. You took that as a signal to go. “Yeol, the door is this way” you told him as you tug on the sleeve of his sweater.

The walk back home was messy. Chanyeol was silent but he was walking in zig zags and you had to hold him up a couple of times because he would fall asleep while walking.

“Y/n?” you hummed in response.

“Nevermind” he replied. Honestly you were nervous, what did he want to say? Is something wrong? But you only let it go.

“Y/n.”

“Yes Yeol?”

He stopped walking, “Why don’t you ever tell me anything about you?”

“What do you m-mean? I tell you about myself too,” you managed to mumble out.

“No, you don't,” he said in a tone an octave lower.

You held onto his arm again and dragged him with you, “Yeol, you’re drunk let’s go now.” He allowed you to pull him and just walked along, still in zig zags.

When you were in front of his house you took your phone out to call his sister, to help you get him in. You helped him sit down on the chair outside while waiting for her to pick up.

“Y/n, you know I’m not one to pry, right?”

You looked at him in confusion, you slowly nodded. You waited for him to continue.

“But I really have to ask this,” he said as he played with the zipper of his backpack in his hands, not looking at you.

“What is it?” you shivered.

“By any chance, were you from Hyundai Highschool?” he finally looked at you, straight in your eyes.

You didn’t know what to do or what to feel. He was sober now, and you could tell he knew what he was talking about. Many questions were popping in your mind, yet your brain felt empty.  You weren’t able to form anything to say. You only backed away from him, and then ran away.

You went straight to your room, ignoring your father’s attempt to hug you. You fell to the floor the moment you closed the door.

Why did he ask you that?

How did he find out?

Were people talking about you at the party?

Did someone gaslight you at the party, again?

Will he judge you too?

You spent the whole weekend locking yourself up in your room, overthinking about the same things over and over again. You were almost sure someone told him from the party, and he will probably think differently about you now. But you are honestly hoping that he wouldn’t. He’s a good guy, isn’t he? 

Monday came, and you were mentally preparing yourself to talk to Chanyeol while preparing your lunch box. You made sure to go out earlier than usual to wait for him so you could walk to school together, but to no avail. There was no sign of your giant friend going out of the house next to yours. You had to run to school or you would be late for the first period.

When you reached the classroom you looked around but Chanyeol wasn’t there. You caught your breath and sat down quietly on your seat. There was barely 2 minutes left before the first period, and you were worried for Chanyeol.

“Hey Y/n, where’s Chanyeol? You didn’t come together?” one of your classmates asked. You shook your head no, but suddenly the back door opened.

There he is

He took his seat in front of you but he didn’t spare you a smile, not even a glance.

The whole day went by with Chanyeol avoiding you and ignoring your attempts to talk to him. He looked at you at some point, but with sad eyes and a small smile. After that, you decided to give up and let him be.

You know—you think you do, why he was acting that way, and you don’t blame him for it. But you at least need to hear it from him, rather than assume things which could be entirely wrong. 

You didn’t expect him to pull you to the school garden at dismissal, though.

“Y/n. I know I’ve been such a horrible friend today,” he paused. He looked down, avoiding your eyes.

“but I don’t think we should be friends.”

[littledrummeraussie]

the closest to heaven that i'll ever be. / getaway series

Word count: 5000+ Warnings: Maybe a few bad jokes. Author’s note: The third part of my getaway series. Hopefully it puts a smile on your face during this hard time. Please stay safe and wash your hands! 😉 Feedback is always appreciated! Much love!

getaway masterlist. / masterlist.

When the next morning you woke up to the sun shining through the windows, Ashton decided it was time to explore the forest trail he found the previous day on his run. Even though you knew what your answer will be, you still let him convince you with kisses and nuzzles as he listed all the perks of spending time outside – most of them being his impeccable company by your side, and honestly, how could you say no to such promises? With the biggest smile on his face Ash pulled you out of bed, already reaching for some comfortable clothes to wear on your upcoming adventure.

After breakfast you left the cabin to go on your little trip through the woods, hands interlocked, taking your time enjoying the scenery around you, and talking about your next step. You knew things won’t be perfect when you get back to your everyday lives, but you wanted to make an effort in trying your best. This meant time, work, and honesty towards each other. But when you looked at Ashton as he told you how he hoped that you can keep being open about your thoughts and feelings, you knew you were on the right track to come out of this stronger than before.

In the end you found yourselves in a nice little clearing with a breathtaking view, and Ash decided it would make a great place for taking some pictures. It’s been a while since you’ve stopped in your lives to capture something like this, and you both appreciated it for what it was – a calm, happy moment shared by lovers, enjoying the time they get to spend together. Ashton pulled you to his side, embracing you in a hug and pushing his cheek against yours, making you laugh as he started grimacing, trying for the silliest faces he could. He laughed with you about his own goofy attempts, and you couldn’t stop giggling for the next few minutes, all of your pictures ending up blurry in the process. He tugged you closer to his chest, kissing you with his happiest smile, and once again you felt like you were finally home.

By the time you arrived back to the cabin you were both exhausted, the day spent outside and your long walks making you ready to drop. After a quick shower and a late lunch you ended up on the couch, a blanket wrapped around you as you lay back on the pillows with Ashton lying on top of you, his head resting on your breasts. He made a happy little sound as you started to comb your fingers through his hair, nuzzling closer to your touch.

”You’re nice and comfy,” he said with a content sigh, his voice already sleepy.

”Of course, you’re resting on my boobs,” you made a comment with a laugh, and he scrunched up his face.

”Shh, pillows don’t talk.”

”They also don’t play with your hair to help you fall asleep,” you smiled, brushing the dark locks back from his forehead.

”This one does,” he mumbled, snuggling closer to your chest.

”You want me to keep going?” you whispered, fingers still running through his hair.

”Please?” Ash looked up at you with big eyes and a slight pout, and you just nodded, hand still in his hair.

Within minutes his breaths evened out and he was quietly napping against you, his weight on you once again a reminder of just how much you’ve missed these moments between the two of you. His presence filled you with peace and hope that you will be alright. You knew Ashton was trying his hardest – just thinking about how he took care of you the previous days made you appreciate all his efforts even more. He did everything he could to show you how much he cared about you, about both of you – clearing his schedule, finding a remote place where it could be just the two of you. All his words, all his actions made it clear that he won’t give up.

You remembered how he looked at you after he fucked you in the shower, how he promised you that he will love you even if you cannot love yourself. Blaming yourself for ending up in this situation was one thing, that you could handle – but Ashton blaming himself was a different thing. He might have kept quiet about it, but you knew that deep inside he was hurting. During last night he held you close, wrapping his body around yours as he talked about some of his favourite memories he shared with you, reliving the good times you had together. After everything that happened between you, he wanted to make you feel loved, to know that you were the most important person in his life. He seemed like the stronger one, but he needed you to take care of him as well.

Your words hurt the both of you. Even if he knew that you didn’t actually mean it when you told him how much you hated him, it still felt like a slap in the face. He pushed through it, he made it clear that he won’t let you feel anything else just love for the two of you. But for that you needed Ashton to feel, to know that you were ready to love you again – your relationship, yourself, and most importantly: him. It was your time to care for him, and if it meant that you have to stop doubting yourself in everything you did, and start focusing on how much he gave you and how much you can give back, then that is exactly what you were doing.

You felt yourself nodding off as well, Ashton’s body warm and comforting against you, your fingers slowing down in his hair, when he started shuffling a little. You opened your eyes to see him nuzzling his face against your stomach just under your breasts, then he mumbled something in his sleep.

”Baby?” you smiled, caressing his cheek as he again started mumbling.

”Hmpf?”

”Did you know that sometimes you talk in your sleep?” you asked, brushing the hair behind his ear.

”No, I don’t,” Ash answered, still half-asleep.

”Then what’s this?” you bit your bottom lip to stifle a laugh, trying not to shake him.

 Ashton did talk in his sleep, mostly when he was extremely tired – or when someone was playing with his hair while he was sleeping. You were not sure if he knew about it, or if he simply didn’t want to acknowledge it. Calum told you that they did record him once when they were younger, and that just made Ash really embarrassed, almost to the point where he did not sleep for days just so he can prove them wrong. He failed miserably; the guys never tried it again.

You’ve never really asked him about it, first you’ve just thought that Calum tries to make him flustered in front of you when you’ve started dating. But after long flights and tours, when Ashton finally fell into bed next to you, cuddling up to your side, he did start mumbling about everything his sleepy mind came up with, and you found the whole thing really sweet and intimate. Other times when he took a nap on the couch, head resting in your lap, your fingers running through his hair as he lightly snored, he hummed his appreciation, sometimes whispering about how much he enjoyed the touches.

The first time you knew that you were having trouble with your relationship was also the last time when he slept in your lap like that. He asked you if you’ll be able to come to the concert his friends were throwing that night, but you needed to say no; your inbox was going off with concerns from your colleagues, and you needed to solve their problems as soon as you could. Ash sighed, leaning down to kiss your hair and whispered a short “maybe next time” in your ear, then left you with the promise that he will be back around midnight. He did send you a few pictures and videos while he was at the show, but you just didn’t have time to check those – in the end, you just fell asleep on the arm of the couch.

Midnight came, and with it Ashton arrived as well, slightly tipsy from the party he attended. You woke when he crawled over the couch and put his head in your lap, sighing happily as he nuzzled against you. He was going on and on about the concert and you were trying to keep up with him, still drowsy after waking up so suddenly. By the time you would have been able to answer him, he was fast asleep, hot breath puffing against your thighs. With your fingers combing through his hair you started to watch the things he has sent to you, wanting to give him a few minutes until you had to wake him to go up to the bedroom. Ashton nuzzled against your palm, then when you caressed his cheek to try and wake him, he suddenly started muttering.

”Ash?”

”Don’t… go…” his lips were barely moving as he pushed closer to you in his sleep. ”Stay… don’t lea– don’t leave… stay… with me… ”

”I’m here, Ash,” you quickly brushed away the tears from your eyes. ”I’m here.”

”Stay… with me…”

His words broke your heart, and you promised yourself that you will do everything you can to make up for the time you have spent on your job instead of him. Little did you know that that night was the last time when he asked you to go with him. When the next show came around, he left the house without a word, leaving you behind.

 Ashton slowly looked up at you, eyes blinking against the light in the room, gaze still sleepy. He burrowed closer to you, fighting off the last of his dreamy haze. His hazel eyes were shining, and you could see a question being asked in the way he stared at you. What did I say to you?

”You’re really cute,” you smiled at him instead. ”And kinda sexy.”

”Exactly what I wanted to hear first thing when I wake up…” he chuckled, a blush colouring his cheeks.

He stretched his arms as he sat up, moving in a way that should have been forbidden in every single part of the world – he arched his back, muscles tensing and relaxing under the shirt that hugged his body. Before he could move further, you sat up to wrap your arms around his waist and pulled him back against you on the couch. Ashton landed on you with an “umpf” sound, laughing at your attempt to keep him close.

”You’re okay there?” he tilted his head back to look at you. ”Am I not crushing you?”

”You’re exactly where I want you to be,” you smiled at him, hands resting on his shoulders.

”Lying on your boobs?” Ash grinned at you, wiggling his eyebrows.

”Pretty much on my whole body, but yes,” you leaned forward to kiss his forehead, and that made Ashton scrunch up his face in another smile. ”On my boobs.”

He reached for your hand to interlock your fingers on his chest, rubbing his thumb over your skin as he started telling you about the dream he had just before he woke up. Your other hand went back to his hair to play with it as you’ve talked, and sometimes he lost track of his thoughts because of that. Ash laughed at your attempts to try and distract him, and when it was your turn to tell him something, his hands slid down to your legs, slowly brushing his fingers over your skin. He rubbed your calves, then made his way up to your knees, circling his finger around the bone, drawing patterns on it with his fingertips.

”Are you lost?” you lightly tugged on his hair as his hands disappeared under your skirt, skimming higher and higher on your thighs.

”Oh no, I know my way around here,” he answered, then looked back at you again, eyes sparkling with mischief. ”Hmm, no panties?”

”Didn’t feel like it,” you smiled at him, biting your lip as he licked his own.

”Naughty,” he smirked at you, lightly grabbing onto you. ”Really… naughty.”

”Says the person who likes to take them off of me… before we go out… or when people come over…”

”To be fair, you’ve never stopped me,” Ash answered, still caressing your thighs. ”You seemed to like that game… I remember someone getting really… excited, on several occasions…”

”I’m sure it was more like… one or two times,” you teased him, still tugging on his hair as he grinned.

”Such a shame. Guess I’d better up my game?” he stuck his tongue out at you.

”Could put that tongue to good use,” you laughed at him. ”Just saying.”

Ashton winked at you, and before you knew it he turned around, lying back down on his stomach, resting his weight on you. He pushed your shirt up, nuzzling his face against your skin as he started lightly kissing your stomach, slowly making his way down. You grabbed his face and tilted his chin up, biting your lips.

”What are you doing?”

”What does it look like?” he quirked an eyebrow at you, then slowly licked over your navel. ”Cause I think you know…”

”Something naughty,” you felt yourself blushing, and the next moment Ash just started laughing, pushing his forehead against your belly.

”You’re so cute,” he looked back up with a smile, resting his chin on you. ”One moment you are all sultry, and the next you get bashful and can’t even talk about me wanting to lick your pussy…”

”Aaaaaasssh!” his words made you all hot and bothered, but also just really embarrassed, like you were caught doing something you shouldn’t have.

You hid behind your hands as you’ve tried to pull away to curl up in a ball, but his hands on your hips and his weight on your body kept you pushed into the couch. He reached for your hands to interlock them with his own next to you, then nuzzled your stomach again, kissing and licking the skin, lightly nipping the soft flesh with his teeth.

”Oh, no – no, no, no. No going away,” he pressed his lips against one of the marks he left on your skin, then looked up at you with dark eyes. ” I’m gonna eat you out and you’re gonna enjoy every second of it.”

”How could I not?” you let out a breathy sigh, and he chuckled against the fabric of your skirt.

”Exactly my thoughts.”

His lips and nose lightly skimmed over your lower stomach and thighs, leaving hot puffs of air wherever he stopped, pushing his mouth against the fabric to tease you. When he finally reached the edge of your skirt, he locked his eyes on you as his teeth grabbed onto it and slowly inched it up your legs, pushing and pulling it out of his way. He squeezed your hands before he slipped lower, pushing his shoulders under your thighs, spreading your legs wider. As he was kissing over your inner thigh, you grabbed onto his hair again, lightly tugging on it until he looked up at you.

”You seem lost,” you licked your lips with a grin. ”Do you need a map?”

”Still good,” he kissed the crease of your thigh. ”Think I found the treasure.”

With that Ashton stuck his tongue out and licked a line up your slit, lightly swirling it around your clit. You could feel his chuckle against your skin as you moaned, and he repeated his action, brushing his lower lip against the sensitive spot.

”Tease,” you pulled on his hair as he again did the same thing, this time with a little more pressure on your clit.

”Hmm, but you like it,” he hummed against you, spreading your pussy lips with his fingers as he licked over your entrance. ”You’re so wet, baby, fuck.”

”Fuck, Ashton! Please!” you whined as he looked up at you, a grin on his face.

”Only because you used the magical word.”

He gave you one last wink as he grabbed your ass to pull you closer, getting to work. You threw your head back as you moaned his name, losing all coherent thoughts as he licked your pussy, his lips closing around your clit to suck on it. He answered your noises with his own sounds, humming contentedly, like pleasuring you was the single most amazing thing that could have happened to him in that moment.

Ash was playing a game with you – sometimes he held you down, so you couldn’t move, and he gave you all of his, lips and tongue working against you until you felt like you will explode. Then he stopped. Gave you a grin before kissing your thighs, waiting for you to calm down a little. After that he let you pull him closer, grabbing his hair as he let you ride his tongue, chasing your orgasm until he pulled away again, chuckling as you whined.

”Where did that smart mouth go, love? Huh?” Ashton pressed a kiss on your lower stomach as he gave you another break to catch your breath.

”Definitely nowhere near your cock,” you bit your lip to hold back your laugh, and Ash just shook his head with a smirk.

”Let’s see how you like this, witty girl,” he said as he pushed his finger inside, slowly moving it to tease you. ”Do you think you can take more?”

”I’m used to much more…” you looked down while still biting your lips, and he just pushed a second finger in.

”More?”

”Hmm, more,” you moaned, and he locked his lips around your clit, rubbing his tongue against it as his fingers started to pick up the pace.

”Are you close, baby? Gonna cum for me?” he asked, fingertips rubbing against the sensitive spot inside you.

”You need to work for that,” you pulled on his hair when he licked you again, a glint in his eyes as he looked at you.

”I like a good challenge,” Ash said, pulling his fingers out.

Before you could complain, his fingers started stroking your clit, tongue slipping inside your pussy to fuck you with it. He knew exactly what to do to make you cum, and he was ready to pull all your strings to get you there. You let go of his hair as you put your hands over your mouth, trying to stifle the moans he pulled out of you, feeling yourself getting closer and closer. Then suddenly he let go of you as he pushed himself up, grabbing your wrist and pulling your hands away, kissing you roughly as you tasted yourself on his tongue.

”I wanna hear you moaning my name as you cum,” Ash pushed his face against yours, lightly biting your lips. ”Want to hear you scream as you lose your mind.”

”I’ve already lost it,” you whined as you kissed him back, and he hummed happily. ”But would happily lose it again for you.”

”You don’t need it now, do you?” he chuckled, pressing his lips against your jaw.

”Stop talking and make me cum, you fucker,” you pushed on his shoulders to guide him back between your legs, and he again just laughed, kissing his way down.

”You’re so impatient, love,” Ash pulled your legs over his shoulders again. ”Are you sure you can take it?”

”Fucking hell, Ashton!”

You didn’t need to ask him again, he just got back to work, tongue and fingers working together to bring you over the edge, this time for real. Your moans soon turned into whines as he chased you towards your orgasm, his name the only thing on your lips as he made you come. He held your hips down as he continued, eating you out for another minute until you stopped riding his tongue. He licked through your folds, wanting to be soothing but making you shake in the process, and Ash just giggled as he pushed himself up to you again, holding your face in the palm of his hand as he kissed you.

”Delicious,” he smiled, nuzzling his nose against yours.

”Not as good as you,” you scrunched up your face, running your fingers through his hair.

”You want a taste?” he wiggled his eyebrows at you, pushing his hips against yours, his cock hard and straining against his pants.

”Hmm, in a second,” you smiled at him, pulling him close to kiss him.

Ash sighed happily into your mouth, resting his body on yours as you kissed, giving you a few more minutes to enjoy the pleasure still running through you. His hand sneaked under your shirt to lightly cup your breasts over the bra, pushing his fingers under it to tweak one of your nipples.

”I’ve thought it’s my turn,” you bit his bottom lip with a smile, pushing on his shoulder. ”Alright, up! Get off me!”

”You’re bossy,” he wrapped his arms around you, pulling you up with himself. ”Why do I love you?”

”Maybe for that smart mouth,” you stuck your tongue out at him, and with that you licked a line up his neck.

”You do know how to use it,” he sighed as he leaned against the back of the couch, his hands resting on your hips.

”We’re just getting started,” you whispered, kissing into his ear. ”And this time it definitely goes near to you cock.”

Ashton groaned at your words, pulling you down in his lap as he pushed his hips up, pressing his hardness against your pussy. You slowly started moving on him, the friction against your clit making you bit your lips, his cock throbbing against you inside his pants.

”Don’t tease me, baby,” Ash whimpered, pulling you closer more and more. ”Please…”

”Only because you used the magical word,” you chuckled as you repeated his own words, and Ashton let out a sound between a laugh and a moan.

”God, I fucking love you.”

You kissed his chin before getting out of his lap, kneeling down between his legs to finally give him what he craved for. You tugged on his sweatpants and he lifted his hips, letting you take it off of him. You looked up at him with a smirk, and you could see that he knew what you were thinking about.

”No underwear? Really, really naughty.”

”I’ve learned from the best,” he winked at you, and you rolled your eyes at him.

”Obviously.”

Ash laughed again, the sound turning into another moan as you licked over his tip, only touching him with your tongue. You locked eyes as he looked down at you – his gaze dark and full of lust, full of pleading for you to do more. You slowly wrapped your lips around the head of his cock, lightly sucking on it, pulling away until it rested on your bottom lip, looking up at Ashton with big eyes, almost like waiting for something. He slid his fingers into your hair, both of you letting out a sigh at the familiar touch as he pulled your head forward, his cock sliding into your mouth.

He brushed through your hair as you started to suck him, one hand resting on his thigh, the other grabbing onto his shaft, stroking it up and down. You let him slip out of your mouth, licking the underside until you could wrap your lips around him again, working him a little harder. Then you put both your hands on his thighs, the sign clear to him, and you could feel his fingers lightly pull on your hair to look at him. His eyes asked for permission, and he didn’t move, just when you nuzzled against his hand. With another groan he started moving your head up and down his cock, setting a pace he liked, his length rubbing against your tongue.

”So good, baby, you’re so good,” Ashton babbled, his words slurring as he got lost in his pleasure. ”Love that smart mouth on my cock, fuck!”

You hummed around his hardness, the vibration making him shiver, and you knew he was getting close. You sucked him hard and long, tasting him on your tongue until he pushed you back, his cock sliding out of your mouth again. Ash was already taking off his shirt, a light sheen of sweat covering his body. He reached forward to quickly help you up, tugging the skirt down your legs, then pulled you into his lap, your legs resting on either sides of his thighs. Your shirt quickly followed his on the floor, his fingers doing quick work on the clasps of your bra to get rid of it as soon as he could.

”If you do not fuck me right now, I’ll probably die,” he groaned against your neck, his hands grabbing your ass to pull you closer to his cock.

”We wouldn’t want that,” you bit your lip to hide your smile, fingers sliding into his hair at the nape of his neck. ”I prefer you alive, you know that, right?”

”Right now I would prefer you on my cock,” he slid his length against your pussy lips, making the both of you moan.

”So impatient, aren’t we?” you kissed the soft spot behind his ear, your teeth lightly tugging on his earring.

”Y/N, please,” he pulled your face closer, kissing you, voice barely above a whisper.

Pushing yourself up on your knees you held onto his shoulders, letting him grab his cock and run the head between your lips until he pushed the tip inside, letting you slowly slide back on him, his hard length filling you up inch by inch. You could have come just from feeling him inside you, and from the way his cock was throbbing in your pussy, he must have felt the same way. Ash grabbed your ass as he pulled out and pushed back in, starting to fuck you quickly.

One of his hands slid up your back to pull you forward, his lips closing around your nipple to suck and bite it, his breath hot on your skin. He switched to the other, teeth lightly scraping against the hard nub as you shifted in his lap, the tip of his cock rubbing against your spot, and you knew you were lost. Still grabbing onto his shoulders you started to ride him, moving up and down on his cock to feel that perfect feeling of him being inside you, the way your clit rubbed against him, how your thighs were shaking as you got closer and closer.

You collapsed against his chest as your pleasure reached you, Ashton wrapping his arms around you and pulling you close as his orgasm followed, still fucking you to get the most of his own pleasure. He pressed his lips against your jaw, kissing it as you buried your face in his neck, trying to catch your breath. His fingers lightly ran up and down your back, holding you close, his touch loving and comforting. You slowly looked up at him, leaning your forehead against his, and he nuzzled his nose to yours, kissing your lips in the process. There was a smile on both of your faces, your movements soft and slow as you cuddled against each other, enjoying your afterglow.

Your hands lightly held his face, rubbing your thumbs against his stubbly jaw, and Ash nuzzled against your palm, eyes shining, a permanent blush on his cheeks. He pulled your hand to his lips, softly running them over your fingers, kissing the skin of your wrist.

”Sunshine,” he whispered, pushing his lips against yours again.

”Little moon,” you kissed his forehead, brushing your hands through his hair. ”My moon.”

”Yours,” he sighed happily against your neck as he pulled you to his chest again. ”Only yours.”

 ”Ash?” you asked a few minutes later, slowly looking up at him. ”Are you… really drumming on my ass?”

You finally gathered yourselves and pulled away from each other just to lie back down on the couch, Ashton on his back, you on his chest, the blanket wrapped around you. His hands were running up and down your back, and you didn’t mind it when he rested them on your butt, but this caught your attention.

”It’s nice and round,” he winked at you, his grin never leaving his face.

”You just can’t help yourself, can you?” you laughed, crossing your arms over his chest, resting your chin on them. ”Drummer boy.”

”Needed to catch up on my practice,” he tapped your nose with his finger, and you scrunched up your face.

”You’re so silly.”

”You love my silly,” he answered, patting your butt once again.

”I love you, silly,” you leaned forward to kiss him, and he pressed his lips against yours, a smile on his face.

”The best feeling in the whole wide world.”

He wrapped his arms around your back, and you rested your head against his heart, listening to it as it slowed to a steady beat. Ash ran his fingers through your hair, lips brushing against your temple as he kissed it.

”Don’t fall asleep on me,” he whispered with a smile in his voice.

”I’m not,” you yawned, cuddling closer to him. ”And if I do, you will just take me to bed.”

”Maybe once my legs stop shaking,” he chuckled, chest vibrating with a laugh.

”Was it that good?” you opened your eyes to look up at him, biting back your grin.

”Don’t get cocky,” Ash tickled your side, still laughing.

”Oh, but you did…” you winked at him, burrowing into his chest as he huffed at you, then pulled you up to press another kiss on your lips.

”Silly little sunshine,” he nuzzled your nose with his brightest smile. ”…and this is why I love you.”

part 1 // part 2 // part 3 // part 4 // part 5 // part 6 // part 7 // part 8 // story tag.

[blackrosesfanfic]

Chapter 240

Chris

"Christopher, this is fucking real." Amber snaps.

I sit up in bed. "Bae."

She stands in front of the mirror. "This is going to be fucking... There's so much shit. I will be having a baby next year. What are we doing? Tell people? Not?"

"Girl, go to damn sleep."

"I can't." She blows. "Do you want to go with me to tell my parents? I mean like you going with me. So when we going?"

I sigh. "Arrange it and let me know. I don't fucking care. Go to sleep."

She walks towards the bedroom door. "It's fucking late. Get out the bed, FatHead."

"Walk faster." I groan.

"Aye, Chris." Trey says walking in the room.

I sigh. "Yeah."

"Cammie's mom made gumbo."

"For breakfast?"

"Bitch it's fucking 11."

I look at the clock. "I thought you were leaving."

"We all leaving tomorrow. You got the place till tomorrow. Plus Cammie's stepfather is here and Cammie acting like a human. I mean... me and Caden just woke up but anyway. She doing better."

"I thought it was you that needed fixing."

He shrugs. "My shit good."

"Where my baby?" I say looking around.

"Probably eating." Trey shrugs.

I sit up. "Is it wrong for wanting Amber pregnant and giving her a hard time about not wanting it?"

"What woman you know happy to be pregnant once she pregnant? You see Leah. You knew Cammie and MiMi. She pregnant. You take the happy days and you fucking go with it any other day."

"She not that far along."

"She pregnant. Who cares? They feel that shit."

I start to get out of bed then grab my balls when I feel a shit load of air. I chuckle at the face Trey makes. Before he could say anything Lane runs into the room.

"Chris you butt out!" Lane yells.

"Lane?" Cammie snaps.

Lane grabs Trey's legs. "Daddy, get me. Daddy?"

Trey picks him up as he scrambles from what might have been Cammie coming. Trey turns around walking out. I get up and walk to the bathroom. I'm not fucking getting rid of my baby. Amber can shut the fuck up and deal with life. She knew we were once trying. Nobody has been doing shit not to get pregnant.

"Mama Cammie can cook her ass off. Taste this."

"No." I snap.

She makes a lot of noise. I look behind me at her.

"Why are you being mean?"

"I feel like you putting all this stress on me about this baby when you and I both know you keeping it. Why argue?"

"Are you high? What are you talking about?" She snaps walking out. "What's happening? Chris acting mean to me because I'm not trying to kiss his ass today. Chris! You have a plane in the morning! I told him."

I'm fucking pissed off at the way she is acting right now. Like who the fuck is this when you been acting so shitty yesterday? I feel like she is acting fake as shit. But I don't know which Amber is fake. Is it this nice as person that seems to be okay with being pregnant or is that hateful bitch from last night fake? I walk into Cammie and Trey's room. Nobody was in there. I sigh.

"Nooo." Lane cries.

"Yo, what are you doing?" Trey asks walking past me into the room.

I realize that I was just standing there. "Ain't no way they can flip like that."

"Man, you don't know shit about little people then. But we woke up like this."

"Huh?" I retort. "Pregnant women."

He laughs. "Oh, yeah. I told you."

"I need to work on my attitude." I shake my head.

"Go talk to Rollie. I'm still working on my fucking attitude." He snatches Lane up from the bed. Lane starts crying. "Boy, what are you doing? Let's take a nap. Wait til your mama gets back."

Lane cries. "No tell Mommy."

Trey lies down on the bed with Lane. "Now is a good time to talk Chris. Go."

"Huh?"

"Talk to Amber while she feeling good, nigga. Do everything while she feeling good."

"Oh." I say turning to walk out. "You seen my daughter?"

"Getting spoiled by Cammie's mom. Cammie's nice twin."

Amber wasn't anywhere in the kitchen or front part of the house. I won't hunt her down to disturb her from her bouncy attitude. I'll wait til after I eat. I sit down at the table with Marco. He looks at me.

"Chris Brown right?"

"Nigga." I snap.

He chuckles then shows me his phone. There's a half naked woman on Facetime. I lean forward looking at the screen. I guess the nigga was showing me to someone not showing me his phone. She smiles faintly. I narrow my eyes at Marco. I guess all men are fucking dogs.

"You bold." I say looking down at my phone.

"She ain't shit to me." Macro's ass says out loud. Damn.

The girl says nothing. What the fuck? I didn’t think that was Marco. I just saw him as. Well shit. The motherfucker is never around. His baby mama is never with him or his kid. Hell they been together for a long as time and not married. It all makes sense. He hangs up the phone randomly. Like he had said bye.

"Marco you work?"

"Military."

"Who was that?" I nod towards the phone.

He kinda shakes his head. "I used to be in the military. I work at a gun manufactory company, which I got through my military clearance."

Hilda walks into the dining room. Oh shit. "Why you never do what I tell you?"

"What didn't I do?"

"Where is your son?"

Marco picks his phone up then puts it in his pocket. This man is clearly not paying attention to shit Hilda is saying. She slaps his dreads then she sucks her teeth walking out of the room. What kinda relationship is this? Marco chuckles to himself then he stands up.

"Thought you were different." I say to him.

"From who?" He shrugs.

I shrug back. "Don't know any faithful people nigga."

"I'm faithful." He nods. "Devin faithful."

"Devin not."

Marco makes a face. "This last time they been together. That’s been like 3 years. He a pretty good motherfucker."

"How you fucking faithful my nigga? I saw that fucking girl. I know you fucking loud ass girl. She ain't gonna go for you talking to some bitch on the phone."

"You right." Marco nods. "Aye, Baby!"

The sliding door opens. "Marco, go get your fucking son. Why are you calling me?"

"Tasha calling me again. I answered."

"I can't stand your childish ass shit." She says closing the door.

Marco laughs and walks out the door. "I tried."

"I thought I was fucked up." I say to myself.

I could hear him laughing still. I got a feeling he didn't say shit about that girl on his phone. I don't think I'm close enough to Hilda to start some shit about a girl on her man's phone. Let me mind my business. Weird ass guy.

Rollie

"Daddy, I... Daddy, you listening?" Jordan asks.

"Yes, Baby." I reply.

She hugs my neck. "I love you."

"I love you too." I say eating my food.

"Grandpa?" Jordan says funny. "Daddy, me and Grandpa going to look for seashells down by the big rocks. Oh Daddy, I have to tell you about my new grades. 3 A's and a B cause I didn't know we had a test and I missed school. I mean I didn't do the make up work. That's why. Is the B okay?"

I kiss her arm thats around my neck. "It's not okay that you didn't turn in work. So you didn't do everything you could but I like B's. I think you can try harder next time."

"Yes, sir, I can. Cause Mommy say I can't miss school if I can't make up my work. I want to go to California with you whenever I can. Or wherever you go."

"Can I eat?"

She let's go of my neck. "I'm going to ask Lexi if I can braid her hair like mine."

"Okay." I say relieved.

"God always has a way." Lonnie says.

I look at him. "What you talking bout, Preacher?"

He smiles at me then eats his food. After a few seconds he nods. "I think we can be friends on different terms now. You see how you can love a child that isn't yours. God teaches lessons all the time."

"Yeah."

"You still pray?"

I stare at him for a minute. He just casually talking and eating. Not caring if he talking to himself. Aight Lonnie. I do see how you can love a child that isn't yours. I don't need him and I never needed him to become the man I am today. But it was never any disrespect between us. I just simply needed him to know I didn't need a daddy. I guess we agree.

"Maybe not enough." I nod.

"Trey?" Lonnie says standing up. "Won't you have a sit? Talk a bit."

I glance at Trey. He looks at me then he walks into the room. "Sure."

"I like to be blunt." Lonnie says sitting and continuing to enjoy his meal.

"Good." Trey says.

Lane comes in the room whining. He wedges himself in between Trey's legs and watches me. What little boy? You got your daddy. Why you staring at me?

"I try to mind my business. That's not always best. Jayla needs a better man. More specifically a better husband then you. One who is complete."

I chuckle then look at Trey. Of course he had his face balled up mad. But Lonnie kept eating his food. I chuckle at that as the awkward pause feels the room. What are you going to say next Lonnie? You come here thinking you the fix to everyone's problem. What's going to fix this nigga?

"You aren't complete without God."

"Oh." I whisper. "Deep."

Lonnie looks at me. "Living in sin is equally as wrong as murder, in this case, suicide. You did good by getting married. God isn't going to punish you for doing right. He won't punish you for being rich either. But you have to acknowledge him and include him in your marriage. Complete yourself with God and you will be a better man."

"God?" Trey says like he never heard of God.

"Do you think your wife wanted to get married because of her family or because of her relationship with God."

Trey frowns. "Because of her reputation."

"Her reputation?" Lonnie frowns. "Well back home she is the sweet God fearing daughter of Gwendolyn. You know the good one. The one that's always in church. Until things happened at school 6 years ago. If I would have known then maybe she wouldn't have her sweet kids by you. So I won't go back in time. Because God makes no mistake when it comes to the lives that he puts on this Earth. Those boys were meant to be your boys. You were meant to be her husband."

"Yeah." Trey says.

Lonnie stands up from the table. "Would you like to pray with me later? Maybe I can give you some personal advise."

"That's cool." Trey says low.

"Good. Lane?" Lonnie says nodding then he chuckles.

Lane climbs into Trey's lap. "Daddy?"

"Okay, fine, Lane." Lonnie says walking out. "We will continue our game."

"I don't get why you and Cammie hate them so much. They don't seem all bad." Trey frowns.

I shrug. "Cause you older, wiser. Would you have honestly listened to that bull... BS as a teenager? A teenager that recently lost their parent? No. That's your answer. I answered for you."

"Maybe I do need to focus my marriage around God."

"Should have been done that." I say standing up and slapping Lane lightly.

Lane just hugs Trey. "Leave me alone."

I chuckle. "What is this man problem?"

"I don't know." Trey says hugging Lane back. "You okay Lane?"

"I okay." Lane says hugging Trey still. "Uncle Rollie hitting me."

Trey smiles at me. "Rollie don't hit him. He doesn't want to play right now."

I smile. "Sorry."

Bad ass gonna look at me to see my reaction. I leave out of the dining room going into the kitchen. Lonnie was sitting with April talking to her. Of course about God. He can't help take the church everywhere with him. But hell if it help Cammie and Trey then he needs to bring the whole church in this bitch. They need God.

"Rollie." Leah says walking into the kitchen. She touches my arm. "I don't know."

"Okay."

She grabs a bowl. "Did she make some that's not spicy for the kids?"

"My mama doesn't make hers spicy. She also makes the rice on the side." I say taking her bowl. "I'll do it for you."

"Oh..." Leah says frowning at me. "Thanks."

I nod my head at her. She hugs herself just staring at me. "Oh, did Jordan tell you about her grades? She wanted to be the one that told you. She was proud of her grades because she said you would be happy. Like I'm not happy when she makes good grades."

"Cause you fake." I say kissing at her.

"I tell that girl all the time how proud I am of her. She just really soaking this Daddy business up. Don't break my baby's heart."

I hand her the bowl. "I would never. Yours maybe."

She doesn't take it. Instead she eats some out of it cautiously. I look down her shirt as she leans forward. Her titties done grown like she already has milk in them. She snatches the bowl from me then turns my head towards the fridge. I look at my mother. She smiles slightly.

"Didn't hear me, TumTum?" She chuckles. "Did you like the gumbo?"

"Yeah, it was good." I nod.

She nods back. "April said I should have made my curry chicken. I didn't want to make anything too spicy. Plus gumbo can feed a lot. Maybe I'll cook her some another time."

"You should have made a cake."

"You want me to?" She nods. "I can get the stuff for it."

I shake my head. "Don't do anything special for me."

"Gwen, Lane is acting like he doesn't know me."

"I told you not to play that game with him. He doesn't stop his little games. Such a trickster like his mother was."

Lonnie chuckles to himself not saying anything. He rubs her arm then walks away. I leave out of the kitchen. I feel a lot differently towards Lonnie and my mother than I did years ago. I stop in front of Cammie and Trey's room.

"Lane!"

"No!"

I step inside. Cammie wasn't in the room. It was just Trey laying there with Lane on his chest. He was whispering something to Lane. Cammie comes out of the bathroom carrying a medicine bottle. She hands something to Lane. This girl gave him a damn pacifier. He puts it in his mouth then he takes it out looking at it.

"You giving him a pacifier?" I ask.

"He wanted to take his medicine like Caden. His ass wasted it all over the floor." Cammie snaps.

Lane a fucking spoiled ass little boy. I swear.

"That ain't gonna be my child. Imma show you how to raise a man."

"Bitch." Trey says then looks at Lane. Lane stares at him sucking on the pacifier. "You can't even stand to hear someone else child cry. It's a boy?"

"I'm saying it is." I shrug. "She doesn't want to know. She doesn't believe that we should know before the baby is born."

Trey narrows his eyes. "You have a girl it's over."

"You know it's different having Lonnie and GeeGee around as adults. Seems like shit changed. But ain't shit change but me." I say.

"Yeah."

Lane screams. Trey hands the pacifier to Cammie. "Stop."

"That mine!"

"Stop boy." Trey says sternly. Lane just lies there quiet. "Cammie talked with her mother about everything that happened in college. Peacefully. It's a lot of shit we got to get through as a family."

I chuckle. He being fucking modest. Bitch ass really saying he fucking told me so. Fucking prat. Throwing it in my face how he made that happen like he said he was. Then again the nigga didn't say that so I can't fucking say any of that shit. I nod my head at him. He smirks. See this bitch. Lane moves on his chest then gets off the bed screaming. He walks into the bathroom crying.

"Lane?" Cammie says. He just screams. "Okay, okay. You have to talk. I don't know what you want me to do. Tell me."

"I want Daddy."

Trey chuckles. "I'm so ready to be right. Again."

"Bitch." I say walking out.

[yetanotherreader]

Useful—4

Genre: College AU

Pairing: Dean Winchester x Y/N Y/L/N, slight Dean x Lisa

Summary: The school’s most popular boy wants to be friends with Y/N, out of the blue. It definitely doesn’t have anything to do with her hot best friend, though.

Word Count (For the chapter): 2,627

Warnings (For the chapter): Language, self deprecative thoughts.

[For some reason, some of the tags aren’t working. I’m sorry about that.]

[[ Also I’m sorry for the no Read More thingy because it doesn’t happen on the phone app :-(]]

Useful Masterlist

Chapter 4

Chapter 3

Time flew by faster and in no time, it was the last week of the semester. Winter breaks were going to begin and you didn't know what to do with your life during the vacation. Lisa was going to be spending it with her family, Dean was going on a road trip with his friends and you had no plans whatsoever. You had no funds to go visit your family, overseas. You were saving for an apartment, and your parents understood. You were, in fact, surprised that they did without any clashes but again, maybe, living away from each other did mend your relationship with your family better. You missed them and, hopefully, they missed you too.

Right now, though, you were trying to figure out how you were going to survive the holidays, browsing the library for some books you could use for your time alone. Older times, you would have enjoyed it. Would get bored, might go into overthinking drives, beat yourself up for things of the past, but still somehow enjoyed the undisturbed two weeks. Now, it was different. Everything was. You were not used to being alone all the time anymore, there was a certain green eyed idiot who made sure to be around you as much as he could. The idiot you've started to dangerously feel for. He introduced you to Cas and Jo, and they were amazing people. Lisa had started spending time with you, too. It was funny. A few months ago, you had literally no one to talk to and now, you barely got to be alone.

"There you are! I've been looking for you."

"Well, I'm honored. Hey, Lis."

"Gotta say your sense of humor has worsened more," she said with a laugh, "Hey. So mom is going on a holiday with her fiancé for the new year. So had to cut the trip short. They invited me but I bailed out"

"I'm sorry," You knew Lisa and her mom's new boyfriend didn't get along all that well. The previous guy her mom was with, though, treated Lisa like her own, and she missed him. For some reason, they broke up and that was why Lisa  moved here for college from Michigan. Her mother's new fiance was a nice man, according to Lisa, but she just couldn't give him that place in her heart.

"Yeah. So, yeah, I'll be here a week earlier."

"That's cool. We can catch up on some movies then."

"And bars and parties and hot boys at the beach."

"Oh, Lord." You laughed, and she soon joined you.

"Hey Y/-" You heard Dean stop, abruptly before continuing, "H-Hey."

You looked up at him to see him looking at Lisa, only to realize it was her he actually greeted, "Um..hey, Dean."

He practically tore his gaze away from her to look at you, "Oh, hi, Y/N. You didn't tell me your friend was going to be here with you."

"Uh, you didn't tell me you were going to be coming here, Dean." You laughed awkwardly trying to cut the tension in the air.

"Oh, yeah, actually I was looking for you. Well, I was wondering if you-"

"Y/N, won't you introduce me to your friend?" Lisa chimed in, practically eye-fucking your best friend—and you hated to notice, it was coming right back at her.

"So, you don't know who I am, huh?" Dean smirked, flirting. You couldn't help but roll your eyes.

It was like you weren't even there while they continued to make filthy comments and it was disgusting, you audibly groaned making your way out of the library, "God, ew."

For the rest of the day, you were supposed to be busy. You had assignments to submit before the vacations started, but it seemed like you dropped your concentration somewhere on the road. You couldn't stop wondering what Lisa and Dean were doing right then. Did they kiss? Or were they planning somethi-

You shook your head, shaking away the thoughts. They were your friends, you should be happy for them if it came to something like that. What you felt for Dean was a tiny, little crush which would fade in no time. You weren't going to make things between you two awkward by acting on it. This friendship was important to you, after a long, long while you were willing to put your trust in someone. You didn't even remember the last time you ever talked to someone like you talked to Dean. He was starting to become the closest friend you'd ever had, so yeah, you were going to be happy for him no matter who he dated.

The only thing was...you weren't.

You typed furiously on the computer, trying to ignore the insecurities that were creeping inside you little by little. Dean is going to leave you too. No one will stay. Everyone leaves. Your fingers danced across the keyboard smoothly yet faster than before as you hurried to get the work done so that you could get the hell out of the premises and take a nap. Because you deserve it. You're not worth any love. You're a disgra- You typed the last words and emailed yourself the document, not bringing anything that was going on in your mind show on your face.

"Y/N!" You stopped at the familiar voice, turning around as Lisa made her way towards you, "Guess what?"

"What?" You asked, not surprised by her happy attitude. She was always so happy, it made you wonder what was wrong with you that you couldn't be.

"You never told me you were friends with that hot snack!"

"Um.. actually. I did." You said, rolling your eyes. Obviously she wasn't paying attention.

"No…" you gave her a long look, "you did?"

Exhaling heavily, you made your way to your room, "Lis, I've had a busy day. I'm really really exhausted. Can we gush over how hot Dean is later when I've had some shut eye?"

"No, I didn't stop you to tell how hot Dean is. I mean, yes he is but I wanted to tell you he invited me to the road trip he's going on with his friends." Your eyes shot up to her face, searching for any signs of it being a joke. It wasn't. Dean, actually, did ask her. They met...like...just now?

Lisa must have gotten an idea of your discomfort 'cause her eyes saucered in realization, "oh my god...I'm so sorry, Y/N! I completely forgot about you and the plans we made. I can drop going, I'm so sorry."

"No..it's..it's okay. Really. Go enjoy your holiday. I was, anyway, going to spend my time alone before we made those plans."

She looked at you, guilty, "Are you sure?"

"Yeah.." You smiled in understanding.

"I can always ask Dean to let you tag along."

You chuckled at the irony. You were his best friend, you didn't need anyone else to ask him anything for you. And you even felt a little insulted by the statement. You could do without this favour. You could definitely do without anyone 'letting you' tag along, "Braedon, really, go. I'll be fine on my own."

She went away without another word. The pit in your stomach only seemed to grow as you did your best to drag it aside. You, somehow, managed to stop the slumping of your shoulders as you walked into your room. You changed out of your jeans into your pajamas, ready to call it a day. You made yourself a peanut butter sandwich and was done with all the chores that you settled down on the bed. Switching off the lights, you pulled the warm blanket over your head. It was then that all the thoughts you'd been pushing aside started making appearances.

Your friend 'completely forgot' about you and the plans, your best friend didn't even bother remembering that he forgot about you. It was like you didn't even exist. You knew it was stupid, in fact it was really childish to think like this. Them people have gotten their own lives which DID NOT have to revolve around you. And pretty honestly, you knew no life revolved around you, not even your own. No one would give two shits if you suddenly disappeared, including you. Still, you weren't supposed to feel this way. You weren't supposed to be so much affected because of something like this. Being left out was not something that was happening for the first time to you. But this time, it hurt a little. The thought of you getting replaced bothered a little when it shouldn't. It wasn't a crime or anything. What did you ever do to make a lasting impact in someone's life anyway so that they'd want to keep you forever?

You woke up to constant pounding on your door. Groaning, you got up to open the door.

"I was about to knock the door down, sleepyhead." Dean ruffled your hair playfully as you slapped his hand away annoyed.

"I was sleeping, asshole."

"Shocker."

You looked at him, bored, for a while before widening your eyes and pulling him inside and locking the door behind, "What the hell are you doing here? If the warden saw you, she'd rip me two."

"For a second I thought you were going to kiss me," he snickered sheepishly. "I called you to inform, you didn't pick up." He made his way inside the room, putting the box of pizza and a backpack on the couch. You scrunched up your nose at the action.

"Pizza? Why?"

"Why are you surprised?"

"It was Tuesday. Did I sleep for three fuckin' days straight?!" You said, flabbergasted for a moment until you saw Dean making the most annoyed face ever.

"Y/L/N. It is still Tuesday. Wednesday, actually. And our Friday night outs are at my place, not here where your warden is ready to eat me alive."

"Your point?"

He sighed, "We didn't spend any time together today, Y/N. I saw you earlier, you didn't look well."

You frowned before the memories made their way back, "oh…

"Well that's exactly why I was trying to sleep, Winchester." You scolded, trying to not sound too cold.

"What is it?"

"What?" You turned away from him, walking to your bed, Dean following suit.

"What's wrong? And don't give me there's-nothing-wrong-i'm-okay shit. Tell me." He sat himself beside you as you crawled under the blanket to the other end.

"There's nothing wrong, I'm okay." Dean rolled his eyes as you pulled the covers over your head.

"You know I hate it when you do what I tell you not to."

"Then don't tell me what to do." Your voice came out muffled, as you replied back sharply. He sighed.

When she walked out of the library, groaning as Lisa and him flirted, Dean had noticed. He thought it was just the playful best friend reaction seeing them two flirt with each other, so he let it pass. Later that day, he went to meet Y/N and saw her working on the computer. She would look normal to anyone around there, but Dean had secretly picked up on her habit of doing her work extra smooth when she's stressed. Her shoulders were tensed and eyes sharp. Yep. She was definitely bothered. What he was about to tell her would have to wait, first he needed to know what was bothering her. He decided to talk to her after his class, but by the time his class was over, Y/N was already out of the campus.

"I never got to tell you why I came to talk to you this morning."

"Oh, you came to talk to me? Didn't think I was so lucky." Was that what it was all about? Was she... jealous? But why would she be jealous? She was so darn confusing, it frustrated him sometimes.

"You need to talk to me, Y/N. What's going on?" He said, pulling her blanket to him before she pulled it back.

"Nothing is going on Dean, really. It's nothing. I'm just tired is all."

"And grumpy?"

"And grumpy."

"I need you to know no one is going to take your place, sweetheart." He felt her stiffen just a bit, not enough to be noticed but enough to be noticed by him.

"Stop thinking you're that important to me, Winchester. You're not." He flinched. He knew Y/N didn't mean that, it was just her defence mechanism with some extra sass but it still painfully tug his heart a little bit. She made a lot such comments, mostly playfully, with that serious face but playfully. Maybe it wasn't the comment but the fact that she was hurt that was bothering him? He wouldn't know. One thing he knew, though, was whatever was bothering her, he needed to make her smile. Maybe she noticed his sudden pause because she immediately spoke up, "Sorry. It came out harsher than I intended."

"S'okay. So you're not gonna tell me what's bothering you?"

"Nothing is bothering me Winchester."

"Whatever you say, Y/L/N." He gave up. It bothered him that she had still not opened up to him even when they'd been 'best friends' for so long. Every time he thought she would, she would close off and change the topic. She still was the mystery girl he met at the beginning of the college, a mystery he didn't know how to figure out "So, you coming?"

"Where?"

"The road trip?

"So Lisa did that after all."

"Lisa did what?"

"Nothing. And well, I've got some work so I can't come."

"Yeah I know what work you got. Come on, Y/N. Be easy on yourself sometimes. It's gonna be fun."

"But-"

"Great. So it's a 2 weeks long trip. Pack accordingly and now we have that pizza." He stood up before she could protest and got the pizza.

"How many times are you going to watch this show, Dean? Don't you get bored?" You said taking your third slice.

"As many times as I please, babe. It's Dr. Sexy M.D, it never gets boring." He said casually, thankfully missing the pink that dusted your cheeks at the nickname in the dark.

After a couple more episodes, you were starting to doze off, and so was Dean, "Alright, let's sleep. We have classes tomorrow.

"There's no morning class. Just one more epi." He said, clutching the remote in his hands, like a child, "please?"

"No." He pouted at your response, defeated.

"Okie." He said letting out a small yawn. Sleepy Dean was always adorable, "So it's settled that you're coming with us?"

She paused for a moment before shrugging slightly.

"I guess...yes," he smiled cheekily as she said that, "but, why did you want me there all of a sudden?"

"Because I want you there? It's gonna be fun. I've heard girls need their girl-friends on these tours for some 'girl-company' thing. I invited Lisa, so-"

He stopped abruptly as she stood up and made her way out of the room, "I'll go and throw these boxes, you change in here."

"- that you could get some company." He whispered mostly to himself. What the hell just happened? He shook his head, too sleepy to think about it right now and stripped out of his clothes into his pajamas.

Obviously. There it was. The reason he wanted you there, it's all here. It's because he didn't want Lisa to be alone around people she didn't know. You stood by the sink and chuckled to yourself, feeling a sting in the back of your eyes. Wow.

"Same old easily replaceable Y/N." You whispered.

-------

Chapter 5

A/N: alright. I know I know. I'm a terrible author who do not care about her readers but it's not that. I'm really, genuinely sorry. Life's been really rollercoastery and I've been dealing with stuffs lately. I promise I'll be better next time. And if you could take out a minute of your day and pray for me and a lot of people who need it, please, I'll be really grateful. They say prayers are powerful and I think I can do with them a bit.

Also, please don't do something wrong with yourself. You're worth every effort you make for a better life. Each minute of your life counts, just make sure you keep yourself and others as happy as you can. Be kind to you and others, I'm rooting for you. ❤️

And show some kindness to the animals too, they deserve it. ❤️

.

.

Tags for useful:

 @fandoms-fiend @mrsdeanfuckingwinchester @itsjaybro16 @mml232 @blablatiti @stilltoomuchafangirl @bat-shark-repellant @bluebell-24 @shortwinchester @always-money-in-the-banana-stand @ima-be-a-mongoose @soullessbabee @infinityspacesuniverse @vicmc624 @roonyxx @fandoms-fiend @slythermyg

[tk-productions]

Mystic Sisters Ch.10- Past, Present & Future

Hikari's pov

"Hey mom made you some soup." Yua said placing a bowl and a glass of water on my desk next to my bed.

"Thanks." I groaned sitting up. Yua laughed at my bed head before fixing it. I woke up not feeling well. I had a hard time sleeping last night and my dreams were weird. It kept feeling like someone was trying to tell me something.

"Are you feeling better?"

"Somewhat, I'm just hungry and sleepy."

"Yua hurry up! I don't need you late again." mom yelled from the bottom of the stairs. Yua gave me a confronting smile and stood up.

"I'll bring you boba after school." I watched her leave and then went back to my soup. After eating I took a hot shower. I looked at myself in the mirror after getting out. The bags under my eyes were dark and puffy. "Probably the lack of sleep." I said rolling my eyes. I went to grab my under eye patches from under the skin only to find out they were missing. I searched under the skin confused before remembering that Yua asked to use them last night.

"Of course she didn't put them back." I say entering her room locating the under eye patches that were sitting on her desk.

"I'm surprised she can find stuff."I cringed at the state of her messy room. Walking out of her room I picked up the picture of us at the beach that sat on her dresser. I stared at it remembering that summer. I went to place the frame back when I heard the voice again.

"Be careful. They're coming after you again." the female voice whispered. I dropped the frame startled. "I'm definitely not hearing things"

I heard Yua's door opened and my confused father stood there.

"Honey, why are you in your sister's room?"

'Hmm?" I turned to him. "Nothing just getting my eye patches." I quickly picked up the frame and went back to my room. "Maybe I should try talking back to the voice. No that's crazy." I thought to myself sitting in bed. I yawned laying back in bed. I decided to watch anime. A little while later there was a knock at my door.

"It's open!" I yell pausing the show. My dad peaked his head in.

"I'm heading to work. Do you need anything before I leave?"

"No, I'm actually gonna take a nap." I yawned.

"Call me or your sister if you need anything." I nodded rolling over and pulled my blanket over me. I looked out the window watching the rain fall down. The weather had started to get colder and there had been more rain than usual. I loved that my bed was against a window. I was able to watch the rain or snow fall. It started to rain down heavier. Something about watching the rain like this felt familiar. A lot of things lately felt familiar. At times I thought it was just me but at other times I thought there could be something more. Was there? There had to be a reason for my dreams right? And what about Yua? Was it just a coincidence that we've been having similar dreams? I shook my head and laid back down and watched the rain fall down until my eyes grew heavy.

I looked around me and there was mud everywhere. I heard footsteps so I hurried to my feet and ran as fast as they would carry me. "You have to get away." The voice in my head told me. I stopped in my tracks trying to catch my breath.

"Who are you? Why do you keep telling me to run!" I yelled out looking for someone, anyone.

"Just keep going." They replied. The footsteps got closer so I took off running again. I didn't know how but my feet knew which way to run. It felt like I had no control. I've been here before. This was the same path I already ran down.

"Hikari you're almost there." the voice said. "Up ahead you'll see a clearing. There's a force field surrounding the area so you'll be protected there." I finally got there and stood there trying to catch my breath once again.

"What now?" I yell out. It was silent for a moment before I heard the voice again. This time it was clearer than it had been before.

"I can finally talk to you. I've been trying to reach you for awhile."

"Wait who are you? Why do you know me?"

"Hikari I don't have much time but you and your sister need to protect yourselves. You need to be careful with the people you surround yourself with."

"What do you mean?" I questioned cold and confused.

"Just be careful. There's not much I can say for now. You need more time to understand."

"Understand what?" I yell.

"Im sorry but I have to go. I hope I get to see you again soon. Just remember if you need to reach me, clear your mind and talk to me. It'll make more sense when you wake up."

Yua's pov

"Haru what the hell happened to your face?" I asked, running my thumb where the scar was on his cheek.

"Nothing just messing around with my friends." he replied groggily pushing my hand away. Before I could question him more he waved at at Hisako.

"Hey Hisako was looking for you. You look worried." I told her turning away from Haru.

"Have you talked to Hikari?" she questioned worriedly. She gave Haru a look and then focused back on me.

"No not since this morning, why?" Hisako kept a worried look on her face. She looked spaced out.

"Is there something you want to tell me?" She shook her head.

"No, I just feel like you should check on her. Go home and i'll bring you Hikari's homework." I felt like there was something more but I didn't question it.

"I mean if it worries you that much I'll go home." I quickly packed up my lunch and hurried home. The look on Hisako's face didn't make me feel better. She always knew when there was something wrong with Hikari. Anytime Hikari was upset or in danger Hisako knew before anyone. When I got home I dropped my backpack at the front door and ran to Hikari's room where I heard her whimpering. She was laying in her bed but looked uncomfortable. I ran over to her shaking her trying to wake her up.

"Hikari wake up, it's me." I shook her

"No come back!" she cried out. I shook her even harder this time.

"Hikari!" I yelled and she jumped up looking panicked until she realized it was me. I sat on her bed and pulled her into a hug.

"Hey you're okay. I'm here now." I consoled her, whipping her tears. She laid in my lap until she stopped crying.

"Oneesan why aren't you at school and how did you know to come?"

"Hisako was worried about you and told me I should come home. Strangely she was right." she nodded, taking a slip of her water.

"What were you dreaming about?" I questioned.

"The voice I keep hearing. I was able to talk to her. She knows about us Yua. she told me that we have to protect ourselves. And to--"

"Protect us from what?" I said cutting her off. She shrugged her shoulders. "She didn't say." leaned against the wall letting out a breathe I didn't know I was holding. After all this time our dreams meant something."

"She told me if I need to talk to her I can."

"How?" I turned to face her.

"Just clear my head and focus." she replied sounding annoyed. She stared out into space deep in thought. "What's wrong."

"She said she'll see us again soon. So that means we've met her before right?"

"Maybe. Im not sure, i'm just as confused as you are" Hikari looked so frustrated with everything she looked like she was about to cry again.

"Hey we'll figure this out together." I brushed her hair out of her face. She gave me a small smile but continued to stare down at her bed. I got up and pulled her along. "C'mon you haven't eaten right." I heated up last night's leftovers and watched my sister eat in silence. Her usual smile was replaced with a frown. When she was done she put her dishes in the sink and walked out of the kitchen. I pulled her back forcing her to look at me.

"Hikari."

"Mh." She replied.

"If you don't stop frowning, I'm gonna tickle you." I said poking her sides. At first she didn't budge but eventually she gave in and smiled showing her cute little dimple.

"That's the Hikari I know." she wrapped her arms around me hugging me.

Hisako's pov

"Mom i'm heading out." I yelled while putting on my jacket. She came out of her office and gave me a stern look.

"Where are you going?"

"Hikari's" I sighed with her understanding.

"It's getting late, be careful." I nodded and shut the door behind me.

"Sako?" Hikari questioned when she opened the door rubbing her eyes. "What are you doing here?" she stepped aside so I could come in.

"I brought you your homework...and boba." I smiled watching her eyes light up. "I know that Yua didn't have time on her way home to stop and get any." I sat on the couch after giving the girls their drinks.

"Are you okay." I asked Hikari who was sitting next to me while Yua was on the floor playing some video game. She nodded, giving me a smile.

"Hisako was worried about you." Yua said not looking up from her game. Hikari looked at me with a puzzled look on her face.

"It's nothing, just wanted to make sure you were okay. I reassured her. I hated that I had to lie to her. Every part of me what to tell her the truth but I know that I can't. It sucks having to keep a secret from her. I felt bad every time I thought about telling her because I knew I couldn't.

"Sako? You seemed distracted." I blinked a few times and nodded.

"Im fine. A little tired"

"Girls were home!" Koshiro announced walking into the living room.

"Oh hi Hisako." Naomi said, walking over to me giving me a hug.

"Hi Naomi. Is it okay if I stay over?"

"Of course. You're always welcomed. Is everything okay at home?"

"Yeah I just missed Hikari that's all." I laughed. "Their friendship is adorable.' I heard Naomi tell her husband from the kitchen.

A few hours later I laid in Hikari's bed with her watching tv. Hikari was watching it more than I was. She moved over to lay her head on my chest.

"Cuddle me!" she laughed. I patted her head a few times before laughing. I laid there lost in my thoughts once again. Before I knew it I heard Hikari snoring on my chest. I laughed and pulled the blankets over us both.

"I wish I could tell you everything."