#i just wanna talk about campfire songs ok they are important to me

[moonstruckloverwritings]

What would dating Sean Diaz (LiS 2) include? :0 if you wanna do that one! I bet he’d use a lot of Spanish nicknames for female s/o LOL

Dating Sean Diaz Would Include..

Authors note: I was definitely planning to do lots of life is strange posts so no worries! And you’re completely right on that one. He definitely would! Anyway, I hope you enjoy it!

Sean’s song to Reader:

Intro:

Ok so I think Sean would be very chill and at the same time very open and gentle in his way of loving someone.

Some things depend on if when you’re dating it’s before the events of Seattle or after. Or if you’re with them and seeing his character development for yourself.

I do think he would be very protective no matter which version of that is.

He’d want to be there in every way. If it’s protecting you from someone or something else or even from your own thoughts. Cause let’s be honest we all have our moments when we aren’t as kind to ourselves as we should be. And he’d be right there! Hence the song

Would most definitely call you “Mi vida” meaning “My life”

Before the incident:

If you’re dating before the events of Seattle then I see so many movie nights with popcorn and snuggly blankets. Daniel would always want to be right in the middle 😁 Sean would try to send him away unless you told him different. Sean’s dad, Esteban, would walk by making teasing comments every so often but all in good fun.

If you guys went to parties he’s definitely the show off type when it comes to you. Introducing you to everyone that talks to him. You’ll probably never really talk to these people again after the party and he knows that, it’s just a way for him to say “I love this person and no one else!” to people so they don’t get any ideas.

100% loves to draw you. You are his muse whether you realize he’s drawing you or not. (You know he’s drawing you but he doesn’t always know that you know. He thinks it’s genuine when you pretend to be surprised as he hands it to you.)

Laying on his bed sharing earbuds and listening to the music in silence is something he loves to do because just being in each other’s presence is special to him. He loves spending any kind of time with you.

After the incident:

Now if you’re dating him during/after the incident/journey to the boarder, he’s a bit different.

His protectiveness is a lot more heightened. Nothing will get past him when it comes to you or Daniel.

And as much as their dad is still their dad, he has taken on some kind of parental figure over Daniel so it would make sense that you both took on those roles.

Talking with each other about what’s the best plan of action when it comes to Daniel is a frequent conversation. Talking with you about wether they should go to their grandparents for medicine for Daniel was a big one.

You both are pretty much in a rush trying to survive and get to Mexico that it put a pause on your relationship. You were still together but there was now things that were more important and you didn’t really think about other things. That was until you both were able to settle down at the farm.

Things at the farm weren’t completely perfect but you both had the chance to feel normal again. Or at least as much as you could.

Coffee in the mornings, swimming at the lake, cuddling at the campfire with the others, playing that pirate ship game that Daniel says he out grew is a normal routine for you guys.

Also I just feel like he loves kissing your forehead/the top of your head. He does it very frequently.

He’s also a big hand holder. If you’re walking and let go of his hand, he is offended! ☝️

“What are you doing? Give me back your hand.” 🤝 “good, now let’s go.”

All in all, he’s very sweet and loves you greatly. He’d do anything for you and Daniel. Whatever it takes.

[irishmacguirefucker]

Otis Miller

Otis Miller was a lad that killed many a man, He robbed the Lanahechee train, But that cowardly killer that shot Mr. Miller, has laid old Otis in his grave.

Poor Otis had a wife to mourn for his life, Three children, and they were brave, Well that cowardly killer that shot Mr. Miller He laid poor Otis in his grave.

It was Charlie Tatum, that dirty little coward, I wonder how he does feel, For he ate of Otis’ bread and he slept in Otis’ bed, And he laid poor Otis in his grave.

Otis was a man, a friend to the poor, He'd never see a man suffer pain, And with his brother Frank he robbed the Blackwater bank, And stopped the Glendale train.

Poor Otis had a wife to mourn for his life, Three children, and they were brave, But that cowardly killer that shot Mr. Miller He laid poor Otis in his grave.

It’s Saturday night and Otis wasn’t home, Out talking with his family grave, And Charlie Tatum came along like a thief in the night And laid old Otis in his grave.

Now the people held their breath when they heard of Otis’ death, And wondered how he ever came to die It was one of the gang called Little Charlie Tatum, That shot old Otis on the sly.

Poor Otis had a wife to mourn for his life, Three children, and they were brave, But that cowardly killer that shot Mr. Miller He laid poor Otis in his grave.

Download the campfire songs here and don’t forget to appreciate OP for posting them. info about the song under the cut as well as some personal thoughts.

Otis Miller is one of my favorite campfire songs and the reason I started all this. I really love the story, its so sad, but the way Karen, Uncle, and Pearson sing it is so perfect. It doesn't sound like a song to grieve Otis, but a beautiful ballad to pay respects to Otis’ life and family. idk, that could just be me hearing it like that though.

 The real song, Jesse James, is very similar lyric wise. They didn't change too much, other than some places, skipped a couple verses, and changed how Jesse/Otis died. In the real song he is shot in the back while hanging a picture, instead of at his family grave. HOWEVER, the actual song is a fucking wild change from the slow pretty ballad of Otis Miller. The Ballad of Jesse James is a very upbeat folk song first recorded by Bentley Ball in 1919 and became so famous that even Bruce Springsteen sang it. More info on the song as well as Mr. Jesse James himself Here

Anyways now some thoughts on the people.

I. Love. Karen. Jones. i love her. I love that she sings so many songs! her voice is really nice and unique, and just like her personality, she doesn't hold back or try to sound perfect. She is singing, with her friends, kinda drunk, having fun. Karen singing happy songs literally hand delivers me serotonin i swear. (we can talk about Lorena and Farewell Dear Sean later bc my emotions are SO not stable enough for that rn)

As for Uncle, personally not a huge fan of him being in like almost every song but i mean. he wouldn't be uncle if he weren't slightly inconveniencing literally everyone. Also im pretty sure hes half the reason people start singing anyways.  However i have a recent appreciation for Pearson's voice. Its so soft and soothing I feel like if i were at that campfire while he sang i would like immediately drift off. Its literally just so pleasant? idk man. 

and Javier. My handsome man, my musical genius. I am in love with how the song is going slow and gentle until Karen and Uncle suddenly recognize it, and then the tune gets a little more upbeat, a little jauntier. King of tone changes?? i would die for him. This worship of his musical genius will be a theme considering he is the backing sound for 90% of these lmao. 

[power-of-plot]

Todoroki x reader hcs. Comfort!

Man, i had a big fic but it looked like trash to me so i deleted the file and now i regret it and i’m sad so i wrote some hcs, sry if they’re bad

Warnings: None. Pure fluff. Killing Stalking spoilers ._.

"Hey, wanna cook an egg on my leg?"

Yes you heard right, he just asked if you wanted to cook an egg on his leg, you knew he wasn't exactly experienced in comforting someone who was feeling low but seriously Shoto..? He sorta nailed it though, you enjoyed doing all kind of crazy experiments using his quirk with everything you got sight of, including food . He usually would refuse to use his quirk for something besides duty but seeing your reactions of amazement to his abilities filled his being with great warmth and cheerfulness.

"I washed my leg, it's clean so you can eat the egg... why are you laughing?"

God he’s so innocent, he went for an egg from the fridge. You can't help but constantly touch his leg as it quickly heats up to a high temperature. "Ready?" "Mhm" You crack the egg and it cooks as soon as it comes to contact with his skin "OOoOoooohh!" "so.. you would consider this a made in Todoroki product right..?" If it is what it takes to make you feel happy, he'll say all kind of things.

Want hugs? Like warm tight hugs? He's got you just ask, who wants a damn thermostat when you have a living campfire! This guy is amazing at giving hugs, he rubs your back and give you head pats even if you don't ask him to. "Is this warm enough? Warmer? alright"

He'll watch anything that may cheer you up, yes even Yagami Yato- ALRIGHT maybe not everything. He actually gets into some of the movies or series you have watched, he even have read some manga. But DON'T- i repeat DON'T let him read Killing Stalking.

SPOILERS!!! "What's that..? Why does his mom look like a guy? He's not his mom? Then why would he... hey let me see!" "You don't wanna know Shoto."

IT'S SAFE NOW :)

If you need it, he'll give you big talks about how it's okay to feel sad or numb despite no apparent reason, he'll comfort you if any of the times Bakugou calls you an idiot or his usual nicknames does make you feel bad, he'll reasure you when you don't feel good enough. And much. much more.

"Y/N why do you listen to this if the lyrics are so.." "Let me be-" Surprise, Todoroki has an entire playlist of relaxing piano and violin music, some songs with happy lyrics and lofi. He doesn't want you to be constantly be hearing things that don't make you feel good, he'll gladly share his songs with you.

If you cry he'll be hella concerned but won't ever force you to talk about it if you don't want to, what's truly important is to calm you down and get you to think about something else "Shhh it's ok, just let it out you know i don't care if you're noisy while crying. Tell me about that manga of the other day, how is the arc you're reading going?"

I'd write some christmas themed fics or hcs but idk.. i feel like it's too late, anyway thank you very much for reading :D!

[lionettea]

ok no one asked for this but here comes some moomin analysis!!

the last scene in Moominvalley episode 12 The Invisible Child with Too-Ticky and Moomin got me thinking about that ending song “Ready Now” and (of course not to distract from Ninny’s amazing story at all) but how the narrative seems to want us to ALSO consider this song in relation to Snufkin. keep reading for a rambly analysis of why I think so LOL. its long read at ur own discretion lol

(moominvalley spoilers if you’re not caught up!)

Alright alright alright so first off. When Too-Ticky tells Moomin to watch out for other lost souls, at first I thought it was going to be a touching but generalized message to the viewers to look for invisible children in their own life (very good) but THEN-- after Moomin thinks for a sec he seems to realize something, and then as the music starts the camera pans over to where Snufkin is walking away.

stuff like that in animation is rarely coincidence and usually super planned out, so it’s not a far leap to think the song also relates to Moomin and Snufkin!!!

Before I get into lyrics I wanna point out a few things about Moomin. Bless that guy. So I’m obviously not 100% on what Moominvalley canon is as far as how long he and Snufkin have known each other & what adventures they’ve already gone on before the first ep, but it’s clear that they’re already good enough friends that Moomin knows how to respect his space, even in Snufkin’s mind/memory.

And he is able to guide others in doing the same (like when he stops Sniff from continuing to bug Snufkin after Snufkin has reached his limit)

I think this experience helped him tremendously when it came to Ninny! Out of everyone there (besides Moominmama, where he must have learned his patience from) he is able to intuit her needs the best of everyone and is most effective in making her feel welcome! (probably from having dealt with Snufkin so much, or maybe its just in his nature) It works well until he gets ahead of himself and starts talking over her/thinks he knows what she needs without listening to her. This fails, and he quickly realizes what he did wrong and makes amends and is the first to realize how important it is to LISTEN! and then he explains that to the others.

Moomin’s ability to understand and be friends with uhhhh basically everyone he meets is nothing to sneeze at AND is pretty unique to his character when you think about it. More than anyone else (excluding Moominmama cuz she’s God Tier) he shows again and again --even when it may take some time-- that he has the patience to get to know someone and find value in them, no matter how different they are from him or how annoying they are to other characters. We see this in Sniff, the ghost, the ancestor, Little My, Ninny, (a hint of it with the groke), Snorkmaiden, Moominpapa, Too-Ticky, etc. etc. (and way more in the books but I’m just talking about Moominvalley for now) and of course our dear Nuuskamuikkunen.

Basically Moomin is really good at at least giving empathy a shot, something not every character can do (moominpappa, little my, and sniff can be kinda bad at it). That kind of caring can be life changing to someone who hasn’t really had much understanding before! 

Which brings us back to Snufkin, who’s privacy/introversion isn’t often respected/understood.

To the point where (even though he DOES like people!!!) he often gets overwhelmed and can’t see any way out besides to just- leave. Like he left Moomin at the party, like he left moomin & sniff at his own campfire with an abrupt “sleep well”, & how he leaves every winter. 

And why does Snufkin act like that? I really hope Moominvalley dives into it!! *rubs hands together* Besides it just being his Nature or whatever, in the books it says that he was found abandoned in a box (if memory serves) and basically grew up totally on his own as a wanderer and never had a home of his own and DEFINITELY never had anyone he could rely on besides himself. When you grow up that unstable, its no wonder you might want to take the stability into your own hands anyway you can. Why form strong attachments if they’re not going to last, or if it means you have to give up an integral part of yourself/your freedom/the only thing you’ve been able to control? This is just speculation though (I’m still reading the books too and I’m curious if the show will even address his past much at all!)

Anyway, considering how often he’s misunderstood even in super friendly Moominvalley who knows what he experienced elsewhere. It’s easier to retreat inward and fall back on to relying on yourself and no one else. The fact he views strong connections to people as something that can cage you/prevent you from being free, reveals a lot about the relationships/lack of relationships he’s probably known. however. we keep seeing hints that Snufkin isn’t always.. totally okay with this. we see that sometimes Snufkin needs company too.

(It’s also worth noting that when Snufkin realizes he feels lonely he assumes he must be sick or something because it feels so at odds with his identity. THE BABY DOESN’T KNOW HOW TO DEAL.)

He really has no idea how to grapple with the concept of Sometimes Needing People. He doesn’t know how to admit it to himself let alone others. In general despite spouting a lot of generic wise hot-topic-like phrases of advice (hehe i love them), when it comes to explaining himself to others (ESPECIALLY MOOMIN) he has NO idea what to do. which is seen in him stuttering and being evasive and hurrying away whenever questioned LOL.

Even when he does think he understands himself and is happy with his own solitude, he gets kinda knocked down a peg with both Titi-uu and Little My/the woodies. Both instances leave him realizing that, while being alone is great, company can also have some benefits!

Okay now we’re ready for the song “Ready Now” (hehe) and Moomin & Snufkin’s relationship. To Snufkin, someone as considerate and unendingly patient and loving as Moomintroll is probably still new, foreign, and full of constant surprises! (he was so shocked when Moomin wasn’t mad about the party thing...)

“You saw through me all this time I'd forgotten people are kind”

Even though Snufkin cares deeply for Moomintroll & does NOT hesitate to help him in a pinch and often goes against his solitude nature in order to comfort him (letting moomin&sniff eat by his fire, letting the dragon go), when it comes to verbalizing his OWN needs he struggles. And yet, Moomin somehow still seems to understand him and is gentle and forgiving (again with the hemulen’s jail, he never demanded an explanation or even an apology, he just wanted to help his best friend despite being stood up haha). 

Point is Moomin seems to be able to understand how to connect with Snufkin in an effective way.

“I was hurting and you knew So you showed me what to do You said "I will listen, tell it all When you're finished we'll talk more" But I didn't know how so we took it in turns To my surprise we found my words”

If Snufkin will open up to anybody it’s Moomin. And we’re talking year after year slow burn.... You can even tell that Snufkin wants to open up as seen in his imaginary conversation with Snow-Moomin. That’s the best back and forth convo they had specifically about Snufkin’s needs and it was in his head.... orz... (just talk to him you KNOW he’d understand...)

But, as revealed in this conversation, a big thing he talked about was not being ready (specifically to come back to Moominvalley, but the way it’s framed hints it’s also about other things as well) and now these lyrics....

“Feet firm on the ground, We stood hand in hand The world seemed to tell me That I have a plan Together we sang

I'm ready now.”

Obviously a big part of Snufkin’s character is that he doesn’t do things the conventional/common way at all. He very much does his own thing and won’t let anyone else threaten that. But the thing about Moomin is that understands/tries to! Moom doesn’t want to force him into a lifestyle or role that Snuf doesn’t want to fulfill, he just wants to be with Snufkin in whatever way works, even if its unconventional.

“You said "I will listen, tell me it all You don't like the ending? Then we'll find one that's yours."

To have someone who’s willing to work with him like this, big or small-- This is probably new to Snufkin!!! Or at least, maybe Moomin has always tried to put that out there, but it’s taken a while for Snufkin to finally start to believe/understand/trust that? He used to think building a strong relationship would mean sacrificing a part of himself, but maybe learn to see that he wouldn’t have to? He’s growing! and its a good grow!

“Something new, something strange Ten feet taller, I had changed I believe you, I'm not wrong Oh, it suits me to feel strong“

There’s that little bit of euphoria where he realizes.. caring about someone deeply can be a really good and positive thing.

And finally... remember how all of Snufkin’s life and identity revolves around wanting to be free? And how at first he thought being free meant to have no strong attachments? But maybe... just maybe... after working in loving tandem with Moomin....

“Oh, how did you know? That's all we need? A promise of hope Is enough to feel free.”

:’) the end

the potential is all carefully set up and there, I’m so excited to see what Moominvalley does with it! Especially since Moomin’s storyline seems to be revolving around him becoming more independent and finding his own, while Snufkin’s is about learning it’s okay to need others. They meet in the middle.

But things are never quite that easy in Moominvalley, so who knows how lost we’ll see snufkin before he gets “found”...? or vise versa. I can’t wait to find out!!!!

[theworstbob]

yellin’ at songs: june week three

capsule reviews of the pop songs which debuted on the billboard hot 100 on 17 june 2017 and 16 june 2007

16 June 2007

56) "Beautiful Flower," India.Arie

I'll cop to not knowing that much about India.Arie. I understand she has at least one classic album, and I can also see that there is no India.ArieVEVO account, so her entire career transpired when I was assuming it was acceptable to live life only listening to white men complain about women. This has clearly been to my detriment, because this song is simply astonishing. It's an inspirational song, but it's only India.Arie, a guitar, and some other voices for the occasional harmony, so it actually felt like, when India.Arie said "When they say shake your moneymaker/Shake your head," she was talking directly to me, decidedly not the target audience for this song. (I want to shout out how fucking great that lyric is again. "When they say shake your moneymaker/Shake your head." GODDAMN RIGHT. HELL YEAH. GIRL POWER FOREVER, SISTAHS.) It's such a cool and compelling twist on the girl power anthem, something toned down, but not so toned down that it feels like you're sitting around the campfire with the youth pastor. This is the second song, this and "Get Buck," that I think we unjustifiably left behind in 2007, and I say we bring it back.

78) "The Way I Are," Timbaland ft./Keri Hilson

I give Timbaland a lot of heck for being making loud and unnavigable music in these parts, but it would be dishonest of me to deny that this is a hot one. There's a build here that's absent from the rest of Timbaland's ouevre. Typically, it sounds like he's giving you a thousand things to listen to all at once, but on this one, he slowly adds more and more things, so once the chorus hits, it's the typical Timbaland mess of sound, but there's a structure, there's a logic to how everything fits together, and I can finally hear what made Timbaland the name that he was. This is GOOD trashy 2007 music. I'm down with this.

80) "Can't Tell Me Nothing," Kanye West

What 2007 vs. 2017 might ultimately come down to is that 2007 has the old Kanye and 2017 has the new Kanye. (Wait. I'm not sure Kanye West has figured into the 2017 equation at all, actually. Have I not been paying that much attention when Wikipediaing the rap songs? Has he legit not been involved with ANYTHING on the chart?) This is probably the best pure-rap song Kanye ever made, one of those songs where it's not the production carrying the day (though this is an astounding track), Kanye is actually on point with his flow and his rhymes. I sometimes rag on Kanye for the fact that his rapping might be the weakest part of his whole thing, but I'm comparing him to like Jay-Z and Kendrick and other dudes in consideration for GOAT, of course Kanye is going to falter, KANYE STILL MADE THIS SONG. This song doesn't work without a capable MC guiding the proceedings. Love this. Only reason it's not higher is because I don't want a cluster of Kanye at the top, and also I'm tickled with "Get Buck" being the rap song of the year so far and don't wanna see that end. Like, OBVIOUSLY, if this were 2007 and this song just came out, it'd be the new #1, but this is a retrospective, and I think it's important we reflect on how violent the "Get Buck" beat was.

91) "Whine Up," Kat Deluna ft./Elephant Man

You know what I don't think about enough? How pop songs end. That's partially because I am bad at this, but it's also not something I think about because we're not exactly conditioned to think of songs as stories. Songs generally don't leave you hanging, or end by saying it was all just a dream (with the possible exception of that one Nelly song from a few years back ("Cruise")), they're sort of like museum exhibits, where they present themselves to you in full, and you consider their merits as a piece. (This is why the critique Mariah Carey gave of David Cook's "Always Be My Baby," where she specifically says she loves how he ends the song on this off note and leaves it unresolved, has stayed with me.) I bring up endings because this song ends with Kat DeLuna singing "Whine up! Whine up! Whine up! Oh, yeah!" for half a minute before fading out. I think the song understands that it's really just here to go "Whine up! Whine up! Whine up! Oh, yeah!" for four minutes, but we still had a few years to go before "We Found Love" dropped, so it needed to go through the verse-chorus-verse motions, yeah sure feature verse can't have a song without a feature verse, but this is a song which knows what it is, and it gives you as much of what you want as it can before backing out, aware that there's only so much "Whine up! Whine up! Whine up! Oh, yeah!" one can take. The fade suggests the song could just go "Whine up! Whine up! Whine up! Oh, yeah!" for ten hours, but we have expectations of our pop songs, and this wants nothing more than to live up to expectations. Quality chorus, though! Had a great big dumb time with this one! 2007's got it rollin' this week! Can't wait to see how 2007 keeps the momentum goin'!

96) "Wall to Wall," Chris Brown

Welp.

97) "Bartender," T-Pain ft./Akon

This song is just comfy. A lovely chaser for the song I didn't listen to but still had to acknowledge existed. After writing a good chunk about "Whine Up," a song that may as well have had four words, I don't want to over-analyze what is simply a nice song, sort of what to let it be, want to point out the casual misogyny that kinda takes some of the chill out the zone, but mostly want to acknowledge that none of the several sets of three minutes we've all spent with this song somewhere in our space is pretty neat. Well done, everyone.

99) "Startin' with Me," Jake Owen

"I took a swing at my old man one Christmas/I never dreamed that it would be his last" ...Did. Did this dude kill his dad? Fuckin' hell, dude, someone should've caught that lyric. How many people wrote this one? Three. Three people. Not one of them said, "Hey, what do we think of this line? It sounds like this dude killed his dad with a punch." But like even if this dude didn't kill his dad, he had sex with his bro's sister, he sold his grandpa's guitar, he punched his dad, he went to jail and yelled at his brother for not bailing him out, he wasn't with his family when his grandma died, this man is fucking irredeemable, and he just goes, "Yeah, I sure goofed up some things back there, didn't I? Ha, if I had a dime..." You get to say that about small stupid mistakes, like the thing about bein' too big a dick to a girl, or the thing about smoking. You don't get to have a dime for every time you commit patricide. You don't get second chances for ruining every single relationship in your life. Who on earth relates to this song? This is nonsense. It's this dark, twisted man singing this Tim McGraw melody, and it's illogical.

100) "Do You," Ne-Yo

2:48 PM 6/4/2017: Wow! A Ne-Yo song I don't remember! What a treat! 2:52 PM 6/4/2017: ...Oh. Oh I forgot this because it wasn't great. I get it. No, no, that's fair. Learning that this was a sequel to "So Sick" is equally disappointing. We talked about endings -- whoa, a thematic link between capsule reviews, who ever heard of such a thing -- and "So Sick" has a really solid ending, that lonely, soft "Why can't I turn off the radio?" and this is, this doesn't ruin "So Sick?" But knowing that dude doesn't get over it for two years kinda makes the dude seem more pathetic than sad. 2:53 PM 6/4/2017: REMIX WITH UTADA HIKARU?!!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!? I HAVE THREE WORDS FOR THE WAY THIS IS MAKING ME FEEL. AND BABY, IT AIN'T COMPLEX AND FILTHY, I CAN TELL YA WHAT.

Two new songs in the Top 10, AND Lil Mama hangs on for another glorious week! 20) "Get Me Bodied," by Beyonce (5.26.2007) 19) "Lip Gloss," by Lil Mama (6.9.2007) 18) "I Don't Wanna Stop," by Ozzy Osbourne (5.26.2007) 17) "Stolen," by Dashboard Confessional (4.21.2007) 16) "Beautiful Liar," by Beyonce & Shakira (3.31.2007) 15) "Cupid's Chokehold," by Gym Class Heroes ft./Patrick Stump (1.13.2007) 14) "The River," by Good Charlotte ft./M. Shadows & Synyster Gates (2.10.2007) 13) "Say OK," by Vanessa Hudgens (2.17.2007) 12) "Alyssa Lies," by Jason Michael Carroll (1.13.2007) 11) "Never Again," by Kelly Clarkson (5.12.2007) 10) "Can't Tell Me Nothing," by Kanye West (6.16.2007) 9) "Get Buck," by Young Buck (4.14.2007) 8) "And I Am Telling You I'm Not Going," by Jennifer Hudson (1.13.2007) 7) "Thnks fr th Mmrs," by Fall Out Boy (4.28.2007) 6) "Candyman," by Christina Aguilera (1.13.2007) 5) "Because of You," by Ne-Yo (3.17.2007) 4) "Umbrella," by Rihanna ft./Jay-Z (4.28.2007) 3) "Beautiful Flower," by India.Arie (6.16.2007) 2) "Dashboard," by Modest Mouse (2.17.2007) 1) "The Story," by Brandi Carlile (4.28.2007) Strong, strong week for 2007. Congratulations, year I have randomly personified.

6.17.2017

74) "Somethin Tells Me," Bryson Tiller 85) "Self-Made," Bryson Tiller 89) "Don't Get Too High," Bryson Tiller 91) "Run Me Dry," Bryson Tiller 98) "No Longer Friends," Bryson Tiller

The artists who have debuted three or more  songs on the Billboard Hot 100 in the same week this year are, in some order, Ed Sheeran (AAA), Big Sean (hip-hop stalwart, AA), Migos (one AAA hit), Future (AAA), Nicki Minaj (AAA), Drake (AAA), Kendrick Lamar (AAA), and Bryson Tiller. ...I enjoyed the couple of Bryson Tiller songs I heard the last couple of years. I would not have guessed he had the clout to release a surprise album, the wattage to get five of the 19 songs on the album to chart, but here we are! Five songs! That were all pretty much the same thing! "Run Me Dry" was noticably bouncier than the other songs, but like these songs, this dude, like, you know how, with Netflix and YouTube, they sink so much into original content because the goal isn't to create something great, the goal is to create something people will watch? Like, if you're watching something on Netflix, you're not watching something on Hulu or Twitch, so it's in Netflix's best interests to throw a thousand spaghettis at the wall in the hopes of finding something to stick. These songs are designed for you to you listen to so that you're listening to that record label's version of this and not something else on some other label. (I can think of no other reason that this should be 19 songs long. I kinda wanted to listen to this album on the bus ride home, get a jump start on these songs, but the album was longer than my bus ride. Why.) Like, these are not, technically, bad songs. I don't like them and barely remember them however-long-I've-been-writing-this-paragraph later, but I never felt compelled to hit skip, and that feels like that's what we're going for here. Listen to this hour-long album. Don't hit other buttons.

88) "Met Gala," Gucci Mane ft./Offset

"I was that nigga locked up in the cell/And they treated me like I was normal/Thankin' the Lord for them blessings/I just left the Met Gala dressin' up formal" I wonder what a better lyricist would have done with that concept, of being an ex-con who can score tickets to the Met Gala. Like, I think Metro Boomin structured a track around that idea, of someone at the Met Gala experiencing anhedonia because they've been treated like the lowest form of humanity and now there's all these rich people who've never had anything bad happen to them, and the dude can't even feel like he's made it because this is a thousand miles from his scene. This is what the sound songs like independent of the words, at least, though I think we've established that the words are the least essential part of this kind of hip-hop. I'd probably listen to an album of Metro Boomin instrumentals, I don't see why we need Gucci Mane in here bleating about whatever.

90) "No Such Thing as a Broken Heart," Old Dominion

This was a'ight. I like that it doesn't suggest that if you love this hard all problems will go away; there's no resolution in this song, only a group of dudes promising to try their best, and that's the closest we're gonna get to complexity this side of Stapleton.It actually sort of reminds me of "Hey Ya!", not in terms of craft oh my stars not in those terms, but in its depiction of relationships where two people look at each other and say "I don't know how to be committed to you." Pop-country dude song of the year 2017, by a mile. (To reiterate, Thomas Rhett is ineligible because "Craving You" is pure bubblegum.)

94) "There for You," Martin Garrix x Troye Sivan

so baby hold me closer in the backseat of your rover that i know you can't afford, bite that tattoo on your shoulder, pull the sheets off of the corner of the mattress that you stole from your roommate back in boulder, we ain't ever gettin' older

99) "Butterfly Effect," Travis Scott

this was fine! travis scott can be counted on to deliver solid songs, and while I'm not gonna say this is my favorite thing he's ever done, it's still nice to hear him chime in. what a pleasant surprise! these reviews have gotten progressively shorter. the next review prolly just gonna be one word.

100) "Strangers," Halsey ft./Lauren Jauregui

So here's something I'm guilty of: Me: There should be more women on the chart! Y'all: Here's one we like! Me: /sucks in air through teeth/ Not this one? So I'm glad that Halsey made a song I think is actually pretty dope. Like, I actually went back and listened to it again, simply because, hey, girl-girl love duet, that's new! I'm actually having difficulty recalling any hit song that was specifically about a same-sex relationship, and I'm sure they exist and I'm forgetting something thuddingly obvious, but this is cool, and thankfully, it's a good song on its own merits. Halsey and Jauregui mesh really well together, and the track is a perfect complement, something propulsive, yet understated enough to let the singers do the work they need to do, a backing track that knows what it needs to be. (Suppose it makes sense that someone who won a Producer of the Year Grammy would write a decent song.)

Only one new thing in the Top 20 because I stared at the list for 20 seconds before deciding I was not going to bump Kendrick from the Top 20 for Old Dominion. We don’t consider how much optics figure into determining how much we love what we love, but they figure in quite a bit. 20) "The Heart Part 4," by Kendrick Lamar (4.15) 19) "Selfish," by Future ft./Rihanna (3.18) 18) "Slide," by Calvin Harris ft./Frank Ocean & Migos (3.18) 17) "Felices los 4," by Maluma (6.3) 16) "Now & Later," by Sage the Gemini (2.25) 15) "Bad Liar," by Selena Gomez (6.3) 14) "DNA." by Kendrick Lamar (5.6) 13) "It Ain't Me," by Kygo x Selena Gomez (3.4) 12) "Craving You," by Thomas Rhett ft./Maren Morris (4.22) 11) "That's What I Like," by Bruno Mars (3.4) 10) "Chanel," by Frank Ocean ft./A$AP Rocky (4.1) 9) "Strangers," by Halsey ft./Lauren Jauregui (6.17) 8) "Either Way," by Chris Stapleton (5.27) 7) "Run Up," by Major Lazer ft./PARTYNEXTDOOR & Nicki Minaj (2.18) 6) "Green Light," by Lorde (3.18) 5) "ELEMENT." by Kendrick Lamar (5.6) 4) "Despacito," by Luis Fonsi ft./Daddy Yankee (2.4) 3) "Issues," by Julia Michaels (2.11) 2) "iSpy," by KYLE ft./Lil Yachty (1.14) 1) "Hard Times," by Paramore (5.13) Also I feel like bumping the Camila Cabello joint for the Lauren Jauregui joint is me drawing a line in the sand I wasn’t ready to draw. Please don’t hate me, the teens, I do not know what dramas have unfolded, what feels you have unfelt.

Who won?

So I actually did go through the weeks before I was reviewing 2007 releases, since I created a Google Sheet for YAS because, when my computer became unusable, I realized it was probably unwise to have just one file trapped inside one very bad computer. But since I put the stuff in spreadsheet form, it made week-by-week comps easier. As it turns our, 2007 got off to an early 3-0 lead, what with “And I Am Telling You,” “Candyman,” and “Jump to the Rhythm” all dropping in the first few weeks, but 2017′s been doin’ better as of late, thanks to two weeks where 2007 didn’t... it didn’t really do anything. 2017: 12 2007: 11 And that’s all the difference! 2007 crushed it this week, which is good, because the next few weeks look pretty bleak for ol’ 2007y. Good opportunity for 2017 to create some separation in this fake competition between two entities that have no sentience as they are arbitrarily determined measurements of time and not actual things. See y’all after seven sunsets.