#i just realized that ive been spelling tomorrow x together wrong

[iwantsomesleep]

💀

[nanasarea]

Sucker I xvi

Prompt: Y/N attends a school for the supernatural, specifically: werewolves, witches and vampires. The school might be magic, but so is love, right? Right?

Genre: angst, fluff, slight smut

Pairing: reader x 00 line

Inspired heavily by: Legacies (and The Vampire Diaries&The Originals)

a/n: NOT PROOFREAD! um yeah, lots of questions answered in this one but not all haha also this is one long chapter but it’s so bad I APOLOGIZE! my writing really doing downhill :(

main m.list / sucker m.list /  i  ii  iii  iv   v   vi   vii   viii   ix   x   xi  xii xiii  xiv  xv  xvi xvii

You woke up drenched in your own sweat, still seeing the vivid image of the lifeless woman in front of you. 

“Man in the hood again?” Jisoo asked as you just lightly nodded, you couldn’t tell her what your dreams were actually about, so you lied, but you didn’t really have a choice. 

“Yeah, I’ll just try and fall asleep again.” You said before laying back down. 

Time jump

“It’s right up here.” Jeno explained as Hana slightly slapped Renjun’s arm. 

“Why did you bring him?” Hana asked, thankfully you and Jeno were too focused on your own conversation to overhear theirs. 

“He knows the way!” Renjun explained. 

“So does y/n!” Hana explained.

You and Renjun decided on looking for Jeno’s uncle and asking him if he knew anything, and hopefully compel him to forget you asking if he didn’t. 

You asked Hana to come along so it wouldn’t just be the two of you again, but Renjun decided to include Jeno, telling him it was just a visit to town and that if they’re already there, they could visit his uncle.

 Hana on the other hand was slightly informed, not about everything, but enough for her to understand. 

“Uncle Olor! Hi! You remember y/n and these are friends from school, Renjun and Hana.” Jeno explained to his uncle once he saw him. 

As soon as Renjun made eye contact with him however, he froze. 

“You.” Olor said, pointing at Renjun. 

“You?” Renjun asked, making everyone else confused. 

“You two have meet?” Hana asked. 

“He’s the one who kidnapped me.” And with that, everyone’s eyes widened but Renjun and Olor’s. 

“Uncle?” Jeno asked. 

“It’s a long story. May I interest you in a cup of tea inside while I explain?” Olor asked as Renjun put on his hand in front of you and Hana. 

“Look, kid, I may have been a bit too harsh, but I promise to not lock you up this time.” Olor laughed, trying to lighten the mood.

After a lot of hesitation, you were all sat down in his living room as he put the plate with snacks on the table. It wasn’t the house you and Renjun were in, it was a whole different one. 

This one was way more cozy, it was filled with family pictures, cat pictures, so on. You recognized Jeno and some of his cats from some of the photos, but for some you couldn’t quite understand why you felt like you knew the people on the photos. 

“Prophesy, explain, now.” Renjun said. 

“Calm yourself, witch boy. You don’t want to mess with a werewolf, do you?” Olor asked, chuckling. 

“Prophesy?” Jeno asked.

“To explain the prophesy, I’ll need to start at the beginning.” Olor started explaining.

“Me, y/n’s dad and another one of our friends, Richard were best friends when we were your age. We were always together, skipping class, getting drunk at 3am in the forest, we did everything together. I even attended y/n’s parents’ wedding, I was the best man, obviously.” Olor explained, pointing at a photo of him on the wall. That’s why you felt like you knew them. 

“Wait, you knew my dad?” You asked.

“You knew her dad?” Renjun, Jeno and Hana asked in unison. 

“Yes, now Richard was always jealous, he’s a vampire where as me and y/n’s dad were both werewolves, so we got along a bit better, but we didn’t realize it, not at the time at least.” He continued.

“You see, me and your dad were closer, Richard was the only vampire in our friend group, most of us were werewolves, so he developed a strong dislike towards us, but we didn’t know it was to this extend. Your grandmother told them the prophesy on her death bed, and Richard figured it all out, and he knew that if he let your dad live, your dad would do anything to protect you, as he knew you were the one with power of three.” Olor continued as he made eye contact. 

“Wow, someone has issues.” Jeno commented. 

“But how? Don’t you lose your witch powers when you become a vampire?” Hana asked.

“Y/n’s mom, she was a siphoner and her dad a werewolf, all she needed was to activate her werewolf side and become a vampire. One murder and one death later, she���d be a fully activated tribrid.” Olor explained. 

“And you can be a vampire and a siphoner at the same time.” Renjun added.

“Richard knew that the humanity in question was yours, if you turned it off, you would be more powerful that anyone could even imagine, and without the humanity, you would be willing to do as he says, as you wouldn’t care about hurting people. He wanted to eliminate all werewolves you see, just because he was jealous.” Olor shrugged. 

“With you, without your humanity, he could continue the killing spree.” He continued. 

“What a bitch.” Hana commented. 

“What a bitch indeed.” Olor agreed. 

“But when you were 5 years old, your parents died, they wanted your aunt to put a spell on you, to forget your parents, to forget me, forget everything and make it impossible to figure out who you are. He did it to protect you, y/n.” Olor explained. 

“Is that why I had such deja vu when meeting you? And the house?” You asked as Olor nodded. 

“It wasn’t until Jeno brought you to meet me that I saw you again, I got scared. When I found out you started going to the school, I thought Richard was going to find out so I kidnapped your friend here.” He explained. 

“Sorry.” he said to Renjun before continuing the story. 

“No hard feelings, but overdoing it, much?” Renjun laughed.

“That was your old home, the one that burned down. I recorded what you did down there, by the way, so I know you probably think I’m the man in your dreams but it’s dark magic, and as a werewolf, I can’t do magic, so I asked your aunt. She tracked it down to Richard, he was sneaking into your dreams to check up on you and he was disguised as me, so if you ever met me, you would be reminded of the dream. I got hold of one of your dreams though, I tried letting you know to stay away from Richard, that’s why I kept mouthing R, for Richard.” He explained. 

“I thought it stood for Renjun, because that’s when he got kidnapped.” You confessed.

After hearing all this, you all just sat in silence. 

“You recorded everything?” Renjun asked. 

“Yes, even your little ki-” “Why should we trust you?” He cut him off, knowing that if anyone found out you and Renjun kissed, he’d be dead by tomorrow.

“You did kidnap me after all.” Renjun added. 

“If I wanted to harm you, I would have already done it, kid. Besides, can’t you use like a truth spell?” Olor answered. 

“Wait, if she’s the one, is she also the savior?” Renjun asked.

 “I don’t know, I haven’t cracked that one yet, y/n’s aunt has a theory that the line is referring to another person, as in like the savior will be “the one”, like a soulmate, but I have no idea who that is. I’m sure Richard does.” Olor sighed. You sat in silence for a while, absorbing the new information

“So, what I’m hearing is that my whole life was a lie.” You said after about 5 minutes of silence. 

“Sorry, kid.” Olor answered. 

“Wait, if you knew about all this, why didn’t you say anything?” Jeno asked. 

“I thought i was protecting you all.” He explained as you felt a sharp pain in your chest.

Meanwhile

“Drain it, all of it.” Richard instructed as the boy continued the spell. He was draining the blood from your system so you would need to feed. 

“She’s gonna have to feed, and once she feeds, she’ll lose control, the guilt has to be killing her after we sent that woman. Just one more moment of guilt and she’s turning it off, I can feel it.” He added

Meanwhile

“What’s wrong?” Hana asked. 

“Hungry. Thirsty. I don’t know which. Need food.” You could only say a few words at a time as Hana’s eyes widened. 

“How long have you gone without feeding?” She asked. 

“I don’t know.” You answered. 

“Make it stop.” You added, pleading at this point. 

“Water, now.” Renjun practically yelled as him and Olor ran to the kitchen to get more food and water. 

“Water isn’t going to do anything!” Hana sighed. 

“Jeno!” She turned herself towards him and told him “Give me your vain, now.” She said. 

“What?” He asked. 

“She’s a vampire, she hasn’t fed in god knows how long, she needs blood and I’m shaking too badly for her to feed off me.” She explained as she grabbed him and pushed him towards you.

“Hey, it’s going to be okay, just breath. Um, I guess you have to feed so, go at it?” Jeno asked, nervously panicking as he didn’t know what to do in this situation. 

He wanted to help but he didn’t know how, so he just pointed as his neck and tried his best to smile while panicking. You wasted no time and didn’t even think about how intimate that was, you just wanted blood, now. 

You sunk your teeth into him as he let out a sigh. 

“You okay? Both of you?” Hana asked as Olor and Renjun got back. 

“Kinda sensitive, kinda hurts.” Jeno explained as both his uncle and Renjun dropped what they were holding when they saw you. 

She’s a vampire now?” Renjun asked. 

“We were going to tell you!” Hana defended. 

“Hey, you two, not the time. At least she hasn’t killed anyone to unlock her werewolf state, calm down.” Olor explained, trying to get everything under control. 

You let out a faint moan, as the blood filled your system. You quickly pulled away, not wanting to hurt Jeno the way you did to the woman. You all took a deep breath as your breathing stabilised. 

“You really are like your dad, you’re giving me a heart attack and you’ve only been here for half an hour.” Olor said, which is when his words started playing in your head. At least she hasn’t killed anyone. 

You tried to force a smile as you all calmed down before you said your goodbyes and headed back to school.

Once you got back, Renjun said that this is far too serious to handle alone so he called over Chenle, Jisung, Jaemin, Hana, Jisoo, Jeno and Mark into your room and explained everything. 

“So, to sum it up, you’re the special chosen one who we need to protect from a guy who we have never meet and have no information on, besides his name, and if we fail, it could mean the end of werewolves everywhere.” Mark said.

“Pretty much.” Jeno commented.

“And don’t forget the part where my whole life has been a lie.” You added.

“You’re fucked.” Chenle said. 

“Language!” Jisoo commented. 

“All I heard was that now we’re some sort of super squad.” Jaemin said as he wrapped his arm around you. 

“More or less.” Hana laughed. 

“I thought we were Core 8.” Jisung joked. 

“Minsoo and Haechan would be offended, Jisung.” Mark commented. 

“Where are they anyway?” Renjun asked. 

“Minsoo is with our dad, some fancy family reunion planning.” Jisoo answered.

 “And Haechan?” Mark asked “No idea.” Jisoo answered.

You decided on talking about everything in the morning, as you were all tired and in need of some rest. Jaemin on the other hand, noticed the mark on Jeno’s neck and decided to follow him to the kitchen. 

“Nice mark, who’s it from?” Jaemin asked, chuckling and surprising Jeno. 

“Oh, that?” Jeno nervously laughed. 

“Y/n might have needed to feed an-” “She feed? On you?” Jaemin asked, annoyed.

“and on your neck, of all places.” Jaemin scuffed. 

“Jaemin, it was the only way to help her!” Jeno defended. 

“Where was Hana?” Jaemin asked. 

“And what about your wrist veins? They’re not good enough?” He added. 

“She hasn’t even feed on me yet, and I’m her boyfriend, well not since she transitioned anyway!” Jaemin yelled as Jeno took a deep breath. 

“Look, you’re like a brother to me! I would never let her feed off me if it wasn’t important! Do you really think so low of me? Hana was freaking out and asked me to do it since she was shaking too much and in the panic, she just fed!” Jeno defended. 

That’s when Jaemin finally regained his senses. Jeno wouldn’t have let her feed if it wasn’t important. Jaemin knew Jeno still had feelings for you, but he respected your and Jaemin’s relationship, he wouldn’t try and ruin it. Not when he and Jeno have gotten so close. “I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have gotten mad, maybe i’m just the crazy impulsive vampire fell in love with his brother's girl, well ex-girl" Jaemin sighed “Hey, it’s okay.” Jeno said as he patted the chair for them to sit down.

“It’s normal for you to have that reaction. I heard feeding off of each other can be intimate, and I know you know that I still like y/n, but I would never try something on her, not while I know she’s dating my best bro.” Jeno said. 

“I’m your best bro?” Jaemin said, acting flustered. 

“Yes, and besides. She’s now your girl, you’re allowed to get crazy over her, it’s sometimes encouraged!” Jeno laughed as Jaemin smiled and hugged him. 

“I’m sorry.” They both said to each other before going back to their rooms.

Meanwhile

“At least she hasn’t killed anyone, at least she hasn’t killed anyone, at least she hasn’t killed anyone, at least she hasn’t killed anyone.”

The words repeated and repeated in your head as the image played. Before you knew it, you heard a voice calling out for you. 

“Kitten, turn it off.” 

a/n: so,...now you know

also yes i used the “the crazy impulsive vampire fell in love with his brother's girl” quote, I had to. I JUST HAD TO. Also, an explanation for 1) the man in the hood, 2) the prophesy, 3) what y/n’s parents were 4) Olor and even a name for the main antagonist (one of, anyway), but who is Richard actually? Theory, anyone?

and I know ya’ll want haechan, he’s the center in the next part so don’t worry!

[gokinjeespot]

off the rack #1306

Monday, March 23, 2020

 I don't know how much longer I will be able to write off the rack. New comics are still being shipped every week but the store is cutting back orders and rack copies are going to be very restricted. I have already been borrowing comic books from dear friends Ryan, Rebecca and Doug, with their permission when there are no copies left after pulling subscription service orders. This pandemic is a wake up call for all of humanity. No super heroes are going to swoop in to save the day. It's up to us to be careful and stay safe. I have not left our house except to go for walks since last Tuesday when I went to work to receive the new comics. I will be going to work tomorrow and then coming straight home after. I hope everyone is okay wherever you are.

 Runaways #31 - Rainbow Rowell (writer) Andre Genolet (art) Dee Cunniffe (colours) VC's Joe Sabino (letters). Part 7 of "Canon Fodder" concludes this lengthy story with the evil Doc Justice showing his true colours. The villain may have been defeated but Doc Justice might live on. It's this possibility that will keep me reading.

 Batman #91 - James Tynion IV (writer) Rafael Albuquerque, Jorge Jimenez, Carlo Pagulayan & Danny Miki (art) Tomeu Morey (colours) Clayton Cowles (letters). The Designer is a puppet master who has manipulated the Penguin, the Riddler, Catwoman and the Joker into taking over Gotham City. I like the unpredictability of what the four puppets are going to do. Next issue's feature villain is the Riddler and I can't wait to see what riddles he has in store for Batman.

 The Red Mother #4 - Jeremy Haun (writer) Danny Luckert (art) Ed Dukeshire (letters). This is a really good creepy comic book. Daisy's visions are getting worse, which I'm hoping will lead to the appearance of the Red Mother. But I want to meet the black smoky scary guy with the white smiley face mask.

 Marvels X #3 - Alex Ross & Jim Krueger (writers) Well-Bee (art) VC's Cory Petit (letters). Spider-Man and Daredevil try to get the last human being on Earth into the Baxter Building to see if Reed can find a cure for whatever is giving everybody super powers. I don't see how the kid is going to survive given who has him in his clutches now.

 Year of the Villain: Hell Arisen #4 - James Tynion IV (writer) Steve Epting (art) Nick Filardi (colours) Travis Lanham (letters). This issue's conclusion convinced me that I dislike the Batman Who Laughs a lot and I don't care what Perpetua does to the multiverse. But if you care, continue to read the story in Dark Nights Death Metal #1, the first of a 6-issue mini hitting the racks May 13.

 Archie #712 - Mariko Tamaki & Kevin Panetta (writers) Laura Braga (art) Matt Herms (colours) Jack Morelli (letters). I'm reading this Katy Keene story because I miss Fashion Television.

 Outlawed #1 - Eve L. Ewing (writer) Kim Jacinto (art) Espen Grundetjern (colours) VC's Clayton Cowles (letters). This $4.99 US one shot is a prelude to the return of the Champions to the racks. But now the kids are going to be on the wrong side of the law. The government has banned all activity by under-aged super heroes because of a major disaster. That feeling of déjà vu you're getting is because Marvel did this already with the New Warriors. If you want to see these youngsters fight against the Child hero Reconnaissance And Disruption Law Enforcement organization or C.R.A.D.L.E., pick up Champions #1 April 8.

 DCeased: Unkillables #2 - Tom Taylor (writer) Karl Mostert (pencils) Trevor Scott, Neil Edwards & Karl Mostert (inks) Rex Lokus (colours) Saida Temofonte (letters). Now that the good guys and the bad guys have to work together to survive the zombies this story got more interesting. I like the familial element with Shiva and her daughter Cassandra/Batgirl and Deathstroke and his daughter Rose. I really liked how Vandal Savage meets a gruesome end. I can't wait to see what new hell is unleashed in next issue's conclusion.

 X-Ray Robot #1 - Michael Allred (writer & art) Laura Allred (colours) Nate Piekos (letters). This science-fiction story about a scientist and his interdimensional travelling robot invention is typical Michael Allred whacky fun. There's a lot of crazy kinetic energy in these pages and you have to pay close attention so you don't get lost. Doctor Max Wilding is a hero in waiting.

 Spider-Woman #1 - Karla Pacheco (writer) Pere Perez (art) Frank D'Armata (colours) VC's Travis Lanham (letters). I'm sad that my friend Gord McDougall, who passed away last year, isn't around to see his favourite super hero get back on the racks in this excellent debut. I really like the new costume. Jessica is hired to protect a billionaire's daughter at her sweet sixteen birthday party on a mega yacht (that spelling baffles me). When kidnappers attack we see how awesome Jess can be. The art is gorgeous and I'm going to add this to my "must read" list. The back-up story with art by Paulo Siqueira (pencils) and Oren Junior (inks) shows us how Jessica gets her new costume. There's something funny going on with it and this subplot makes this $4.99 US debut seem cheap at twice the price.

 The Resistance #1 - J. Michael Straczynski (writer) Mike Deodato Jr. (art) Frank Martin (colours) Sal Cipriano (letters). J. Michael Straczynski, now that's a name that I haven't seen on the racks for a while. I'm so glad he's back. This is the comic book of the week if not the year. It starts off with a global pandemic which immediately pulled me in because of what's currently happening in real life. By the end of this first issue I realized that what happened in the comic was just a way to grant random people super powers all at once all around the world. Not a new concept I know, but it's being done by one of my favourite writers and a very good artist. I'm adding this 6-issue mini to my "must read" list. This book is from brand new publisher AWA which stands for Artists, Writers and Artisans. I will be looking for their books by Frank Cho, Peter Milligan, and Garth Ennis when they hit the racks in the future. You should too.

 Conan the Barbarian #14 - Jim Zub (writer) Roge Antonio (art) Israel Silva (colours) VC's Travis Lanham (letters). The explanation of how Conan survives being run through with a sword made me groan but I read on. Conan and the remaining warriors must work together to survive the rest of the gauntlet but one of them is a treacherous killer. Who that is keeps me interested.

 Something is Killing the Children #6 - James Tynion IV (writer) Werther Dell'Edera (art) Miquel Muerto (colours) AndWorld Design (letters). A new story starts here. It looks like we're going to get Erica's origin story and I'm looking forward to finding out more about Ms. Slaughter.

 Guardians of the Galaxy #3 - Al Ewing (writer) Nina Vakueva, Chris Sprouse, Belen Ortega & Juann Cabal (pencils) Nina Vakueva, Karl Story, Belen Ortega & Juann Cabal (inks) Federico Blee (colours) VC's Cory Petit (letters). In the aftermath of Peter's "death" (he'll return eventually I'm sure) the rest of the Guardians must get on with their lives. A new client hires them but I see a big conflict of interest in their new mission. Their new client made me wonder if a copyright infringement was being made by Marvel. Someone over there forget about Bucky O'Hare? Is Blackjack related? Okay, a quick search confirms that Blackjack O'Hare first appeared in a Marvel comic in May 1982 and Bucky first appeared in the Continuity Graphics title Echo of Futurepast #1 in May 1984 with some sweet art by Michael Golden. Law suits averted.

 Fantastic Four #20 - Dan Slott (writer) Peco Medina (art) Jesus Aburtov (colours) VC's Joe Caramagna (letters). This is a great one-shot story for fans thinking about adding this book to their sub. The Four return from their space adventure on Spyre with Johnny's soul mate Sky. Then the new couple goes to help Wyatt Wingfoot with an attack by the Mole Man. Everything is wrapped up nice and neat in this one issue and you will get the warm and fuzzies getting to know Marvel's First Family. I still like this book.

 Valkyrie #9 - Jason Aaron & Torunn Gronbekk (writers) Ramon Rosanas (art) Jesus Aburtov (colours) VC's Joe Sabino (letters). How many times can Jason Aaron bring about a Ragnarok-like event? As many times as he wants as far as I'm concerned. Here we have Tyr unleashing an ancient dark power and now it's up to Val to stop it. This title is still top tier.

 X-Force #9 - Benjamin Percy (writer) Joshua Cassara (art) Dean White (colours) VC's Joe Caramagna (letters). I continue to read books that I feel aren't that great for a variety of reasons. I'm not fond of the art in this title and the missions that this team goes on are okay, not great. I do however, like that Domino and Wolverine are on this team. Their behaviour in this book will determine how long I stay a fan.

 Robin 100-Page Super Spectacular - These one-shot anthologies are a great way to catch up on characters. There are 10 short stories featuring the 5 Robins: Dick Grayson, Jason Todd, Tim Drake, Stephanie Brown and Damian Wayne. There are a couple of retro stories by Marv Wolfman and Chick Dixon that were hokey. I preferred the current stories by James Tynion V, Peter J. Tomasi and Robbie Thompson. The last story made me curious about what's happening with Damian leading the Teen Titans. Pick up this $9.99 US 80th Anniversary book to get a nice picture of one of comics' iconic sidekicks.

[gray-anxiety]

No Sympathy Facts/ the chaos of my brain

I kept forgetting the damn name

Legit

Like “No… no wHAT????? Oh”

Aella is a name associated with storms and wind, so I gave her that name because I wanted someone who really did embody that

I kept wanting to spell Aella’s name allen smh

This book started when i finally got off my ass and convinced myself to do a mafia au. The entire plot was pulled out of my ass in a period of brainstorming that kept me up until 5:30 the next morning

I actually sketched out the apartment’s layout so I could see it better.

later I actually designed a messy version of what it’d somewhat be like in the sims

Karanese is actually a district in the Attack on Titan universe :)

Each chapter takes me like 2 hours to write simply because I play out each and every ending in my head and choose the best one I’d want to see in a story

Other times I legit just have a feeling like I absolutely know how a chapter plays out like Chapter 3’s murder fight scene. It just came to me and all I had to do was describe it like I had just watched a movie

Chapter one took a total of seven hours to write

The plot twists were created when I asked myself what cliche can I change?

(Except I kept a few just to make fun of it I.E. roommates and badboy x nerdy character because that shit is hilarious and can really show the dynamic of how different each character really is)

Chapter two bore me to death to be honest

An actual example of my brainstorming while writing down facts:

I have no idea what the fuck to do after chapter 3 help

I pretty much said fuck it to planning out a plot and just wung it

Where am I gonna place Hange and the others

What about Eren lol

OH SHIT I JUST HAD THE IDEA THAT HANGE AND AELLA WERE FRIENDS BEFORE AELLA WAS KICKED OUT AOUFHALIUEHFALIUEHF

THEY’D TOTALLY BE LESBIANS FOR EACH OTHER

How’d you come up with the name for No Sympathy?

hilarious answer, actually. I spent two damn hours laying on my bed googling “what’s your mafia nickname” to just messing around with broken languages on google translate until it just popped in my head. Pretty much I was like “oh shit that sounds lit and fearsome lets do it bois” and yeah

I’m actually making this list of fun facts while writing each chapter. I’m going to start working on chapter 4 tomorrow and hopefully get my shit together to make a somewhat good plot??

Lmao I lied I got really fucking lazy and wrote the chapter at 11 at night and published it at midnight

I wrote everything about no sympathy in one iCloud note and titled it “No sympathy; the complete chaos of making a book”

The true main character of No Sympathy is actually Levi since I feel like I understand him completely since I relate to him so much; making Levi the easiest character I’ve written about ever. Though, his true character (in my opinion) doesn’t necessarily shine through in the beginning chapters as Levi don’t get along with new people, but you can see him warm up to Aella by doing her homework, dragging her out of the party, etc.

I’ve realized I have a distinct writing pattern while writing No Sympathy: comma, semi-colon, double dash. (Chapters two and three really showcase it as I wrote those two back to back in the car)

Had I actually had the inspiration and the motivation to write this almost a year ago, I would’ve been writing about the mafia at 13, which is an absolute hilarious thought to think about when I look back to my previous fanfics. Then again, my dumbass 14-year-old self is just as clingy as my dumbass 13-year-old self lmaoo

I gave Aella the same birth day (not year lmao) as mine (September 10) so she’d be 17 during the first month of school and 18 for the rest of the book

Going off of that fact, Levi is exactly 1 year and 8 months older than Aella (I kept his original birthday)

My cat demanded that I gave him cuddles and attention so I had to stop writing for one entire day because he wanted cuddles

Normally my cat just lays on my chest while I write b u t n o he wanted cuddles

If Levi never came into the picture Aella would probably date Hanji (for all of those fellow LGBTQIA+ readers and readers that really love Hanji)

While writing chapter 1 I listened to Ghost by Halsey on repeat and I think if you read while playing the exact song it somewhat shows in the pace I set for readers.

The term ‘block class’ is actually derived from what my own high school (even though I’m not even fully considered a freshman yet jfc) uses when referring to a 90 minute class

The book Technically begins on a Saturday with Levi — the actual power duo meet that Monday (because unlike dumbass schools in real life, their first day of school was on a Monday instead of the Friday before.) on their first day. That Tuesday was chapter 4, Wednesday being chapter 5, Thursday being chapter 6 (we skip Friday because it doesn’t fucking matter in the story lmao), and Saturday being the day of the party.

Writing an x reader but without the reader was really fucking hard, honestly. I couldn’t just randomly say ‘Levi looked over at the H/C girl working on her homework across from him’ as it’d just be weird, so I thought of the next best thing and never described Aella — making her free for interpretation of her looks.

I was going to have Aella have a name reveal like ‘my real name is Y/N…’ but then I was like “No what? Fuck it. Levi already knew from the beginning after looking at her documents.”

No Sympathy was actually going to be an original story, but Levi’s character fit so well I decided to make it a fanfic.

I actually wanted to stop writing after chapter 3 because I didn’t know what to do with the plot, but I asked my friend for help coming up with the plot using the paragraphs of ideas I had to make an actual plot. So, I can successfully say I owe it to her for helping and the one sentence that kept me going in my head: “I want to make a story I’m proud of.” So I fucked up my (nonexistent, really lmao) sleeping and eating schedules and started working on this book everyday even when I didn’t post a chapter that day.

Though, it’s not really specified in the early chapters, Aella was bullied into being hated by the entire school — leaving her to be all alone, which actually happened to me and gave me PTSD after transferring.

Ironically, I gave Aella a ton of reactions and characteristics I would/ just generally have, but I see myself more in Levi, which is probably why I prefer writing about him over Aella.

As of writing this, chapter 5 is currently my favorite chapter as it is a mix of a filler chapter and a regular important chapter still just as important as the rest.

Depression and PTSD actually got in the way of writing so many times I actually am surprised I’ve written so much

As writing has always been my go to for letting out everything (as I have z e r o close friends lmao) I actually don’t realize when I’m done with each chapter until I realize I’m out of ideas for said chapter.

I don’t even realize I write about 2,000 words until it’s like “oh,,”

No Sympathy wasn’t just any fanfic for me, it was like I was actually Aella seeing the entire story unfold from beginning to finish

I tried to push myself to describe more, as I’ve noted while rereading my previous shitty fanfics — I struggled describing everything.

I tried to not have the basic “tch”, “brat”, and just random cursing from Levi unless it was at the exact wrong time (or I just put it in because I could totally see him saying that in said situation)

I tried characterizing Hanji as someone who wasn’t the basic overexcited dumbass most fanfics portray her as — instead I tried thinking of her as an actual person with reactions and different moods  and tried to embody that each time I wrote her

Character development is a huge thing Ive been trying to work on ever since I wrote A Valkyrie and a Mischievous God (though that character development and story sucked ass and I cringe at how popular it’s gotten), and a huge target for it was none other than Aella. At the beginning you could see she felt trapped in an endless cycle of stress and fending for herself, but when Levi came in and was like “lmao I have money you don’t have to stress” she felt like she was in an odd spot, and eventually after she reunited with Hanji she started to feel more free

Parents were completely cut out of this story because I genuinely don’t know how to write them as mine are either states away by choice or always working, so I just had Aella get kicked out and had her entire family gone.

My best ideas surface at 4 am when I’m trying to fucking sleep

Help me

But hey I now have a new passion for this book

I generally didn’t know how to end it

buT THEN I D I D

A huge thing for me, and my entire driving motion for writing this was a simple sentence: “I want to write something I’m proud of.”

Am I proud of this?

Eh. It’s not shitty, I suppose. I could always do better.

Characterization was so difficult for me. I wanted to stray from basic fanfics of an overly hyper Hange (though, I couldn’t help in some situations, but after watching an entire season and a half in one day, you notice personality changes) and write and more serious one — except I’m a damn shitty author with so many grammatical mistakes my ex-mentor would literally rip her hair out.

Writing a book has always been my goal, and I know this is the only thing that will ever come close to it.

I have another Levi x reader planned, but I always hate doing the basic ‘_____’ ‘Y/N’, etc because it literally drives my depressed self I n s a n e when writing

Most times for my outline summaries of the chapters I just put my name in place of Aella lmao

I actually struggled a lot when writing this; sometimes I even broke down thinking no one liked this book or I wasn’t a good enough author to write anymore.

My asshole self mainly spent my summer writing this rip

Currently, as it is July 2nd, I am literally hoping to Levi that I fucking get this done before August or else I’m so fucking screwed with beginning high school and shit.

Oh yeah btw, I’M NOT FUCKING READY FOR THE FINAL SEASON. I’LL BE A DAMN SOPHOMORE AND THAT IN ITSELF K I L L S ME

I don’t know if I’m actually going to continue with this book, but have these collected facts I started writing the moment the first chapter was out :,) It’s already September and my past dumbass was right

High school is kicking my ass

I have another story idea/plot written out and I really like it so idk. I think I’d stop halfway again because I’d think that no one would like it