#i just needed to scream about my lucker feelings because there are so many and i can't hold them all

[bizarrebird]

Okay, so I was talking with people a little about this, but I wanna talk about luckington (yes again, don’t look at me)

So I love tuckington, way better people than me have written so much meta about them and how they get together and it’s all A+. And the parallels with Wash and Locus and the dynamics of locington have also been explored in so much wonderful depth and I eat that shit up

Which is why I’m here to talk about the third side of this ot3: lucker. You need all the pieces to make this puzzle work, so here we fucking go - under a readmore cause this got long as fuck

Because it amuses me, I like giving Felix and Tucker parallels to go along with those Wash and Locus ones

And (spoilers) but this season gave some choice moments for that, cause okay, Tucker laughing at Locus’ ‘no killing policy’ and also having so few reservations about killing this season, like I’m not saying he’s going down a Felix road cause this naaaah fuck that, but there’s moments

And you know who’s going to fucking see those moments better than anyone else: tall dark and emotionally stunted Locus

There’s other things too, Tucker babbling and accidentally giving himself away and (okay this is more my headcanon) having the fucking hardest time sitting still and acting like he’s hot shit and then getting pissed and upset when he’s not

And Locus just “unfortunate”

Because he’s seeing all the things that drew him to Felix initially, his boisterous attitude (that wasn’t always an act) and his snark and his stupid sense of humor that makes Locus roll his eyes (that’s Felix’s eye roll, specially saved for him)

At first, Locus doesn’t know how to deal, so he just doesn’t, because he can also see all the things he wanted Felix to be, all the the things he needed in a partner, all the things that he doesn’t deserve anymore

Then we’ve got Tucker’s side of things

Tucker, who had Felix pull his strings for just a short amount of time (weeks? months? timeline what???) and there’s still some lasting scars that he thinks are pretty shitty until he sees Locus

And then oh boy

Cause those scars run fuckin deep and it doesn’t take Tucker too long to piece together who put them there

And at first like, he kinda feels for the guy, but he also doesn’t trust him and he didn’t do all that shit cause Felix told him to, so eh

But then he looks a little deeper and he can see those similarities to Wash and then Tucker’s just fuuuuuuuuuck

Cause this is where Wash could’ve ended up, this is how bad he could’ve gotten, and yeah Locus is trying to put himself back together and change, but he’s doing it all on his own and that fucking sucks (no Tucker’s not projecting his own abandonment issues here what are you talking about)

So he just has to try to needle his way into Locus fort knox level fortifications around his bruised and battered heart

Just gotta slowly teach him how to be a person again, gotta drag him back from his ‘grim dark lone wandering atoner’ thing kicking and screaming

Cause yeah, doing this shit alone, that’s not gonna work, sorry Locus

Personally, I think the moment’s that gotta clinch it for Tucker is if he sees Locus wake up from a nightmare, I’m talking like full thrashing, not screaming, cause even in his dreams Locus can’t let himself break, can’t let himself cry for help

And Tucker wakes him up and gets pinned to the fucking wall (knife at his throat optional) and he talks Locus down and just ‘well shit, now I’ve gotta fix this’ cause you can’t see that shit and just walk away

But Locus just tries to shut down and sees this as seven further reason to keep people out, but naaaah, naaaaaaah, that’s not in Tucker’s playbook here, so it’s not happening

So he starts with small stuff, just inserting himself into Locus’ day to day whatever

Locus goes for runs int he morning, Tucker’s there. He makes himself weird fancy herbal tea, Tucker’s there asking what it tastes like and if he can have a sip and then making the worst faces (dude, how do you drink this shit, what the fuck). He tries to just sit alone with his bug collection, Tucker’s there calling him a nerd and then asking detailed question about all of them

Cause okay, I see Tucker as the person who doesn’t necessarily ‘get’ some people’s interests, but he’ll be damned if he doesn’t do his best to support them

So just, bit by bit, he gets Locus to open up a little (realizing along the way that under layers of dark brooding, there’s a giant fucking nerd who likes bugs and alien languages and reading really long stuffy novels my headcanons you will pry out of my cold dead hands)

Along the way there’s snark, so much snark, cause Locus can’t just take this shit lying down, and also he helps Tucker

Cause, and here’s the thing here, this needs to go both ways. Tucker can heal and give and love, and that’s wonderful, but this can’t just be a onesided thing, it can’t be Tucker pouring his too big heart out and getting nothing back, cause a) that’s not fucking fair and b) not how functional relationships work

And honestly? deep down, Locus wants this to work, past the part of himself that doesn’t think he gets good things, past the bits that are too scarred to remember how to person, he doesn’t want to lose another (potential) partner

So he looks for things Tucker needs and does what he can to help there

I would sell my fucking soul for Locus giving Tucker sword fighting lessons tbh

And for him to teach Tucker that vengeance isn’t always the way (Carolina and Wash are gonna help here too obvi, but there’s a luckinglina post to be made about that, which I’ll get to later) and that it’s okay to be angry, but there are better ways to channel that anger

Also both of them working together to figure out how to grieve for people they don’t know how to let themselves miss

Honestly, how the fuck do you deal with feeling grief for Felix? Cause Locus has to miss the guy despite everything, they were partners for so goddamn long

And Tucker’s never really properly dealt with his Church grief

Both of them sitting up at night (can’t sleep, nightmares) trading stories about Felix and Church

Tucker saying something that actually manages to get a laugh out of Locus, and holy shit he has a nice laugh??? like it’s sort of low and rumbling and goes through his whole body (Tucker can probably kinda feel it if he’s pressed up against Locus’ side) and he just wants to wrap himself up in that laugh and hold onto it forever

So Tucker’s just gotta make it his personal mission to make Locus laugh as often as possible

They probably end up falling asleep sort of snuggled together on the couch and wake up to find someone threw a blanket over them (probably Grif, gotta look out for his bros)

And look, just, Tucker teaching Locus how to be a person again and Locus picking up where Wash left off and helping Tucker get stronger to protect his friends, while also falling headfirst into that category

Okay, I’ve gotta stop there, I could keep going forever, but fuck this is so long already