#i just love the thought of zach taking forever to find the perfect ring for cammie

[whats-rambled-rambled]

Stuck in reverse - playlist

You can find it on Spotify here. 

Okay, let’s talk about it! 

Sam Smith – Fix you

I remember crying to the original song (by Coldplay) back in 2005. Whoo boy, lots of teenage feelings!

I’m not the biggest fan of Sam Smith’s music, but one day I was just driving home from work and this song began playing on the radio and by the end of it I could barely see the road.

// When you try your best, but you don’t succeed When you get what you want, but not what you need When you feel so tired, but you can’t sleep Stuck in reverse And the tears come streaming down your face When you lose something you can’t replace When you love someone, but it goes to waste Could it be worse? //

That one line – stuck in reverse – felt just so perfect for a story set in the universe where people invert themselves back and forth.

It became one of the three main songs that inspired me to write the whole damn thing, and also the only title in the story that is not a title of a song as well.

Chapter 1: Ben Platt – Ease my mind 

This is one of the songs I have on my daily playlist, I just love it, and the lyrics are so fitting:

//Most days I wake up with a pit in my chest There are thoughts that I can’t put to rest There’s a worry that I can’t place

Most nights, I am restless and quiet won’t come So I lay there and wait for the sun There’s a trouble that won’t show its face

You came out of nowhere and you cut through all the noise I make sense to the madness when I listen to your voice//

We learn more about the nightmares in the next chapters, but it all starts here. That melancholic vibe stuck with me for the rest of the story I guess.

Bonus song: Lewis Capaldi - Before you go

The combat scene in one song, or at least what I imagined was going through Reader’s mind at that point.

//I fell by the wayside like everyone else I hate you, I hate you, I hate you but I was just kidding myself Our every moment, I start to replace ‘Cause now that they’re gone, all I hear are the words that I needed to say When you hurt under the surface Like troubled water running cold Well, time can heal but this won’t//

Have you ever felt that way? Trying to hide your broken heart under anger? I don’t know, it just resonated deeply.

The second part of the song kinda seeped into the next chapter:

//Was there something I could’ve said To make your heart beat better? If only I’d have known you had a storm to weather

//Would we be better off by now If I’d have let my walls come down? Maybe, I guess we’ll never know//

Chapter 2: Kaleo - I can’t go on without you

Another song from my daily playlists (side note – I saw Kaleo once live on a music festival and they were mind-blowing, you should really check out more of their work).

It worked with the story because of its desperate and painful mood.

Bonus: Calum Scott - Dancing on my own

Holy shit, I FELT this one. (Been there, done that). Of course I had to write it into Reader’s past. Actually, I wrote it first and then found the song, but it doesn’t matter, that’s the flashback scene right here:

//Somebody said you got a new friend Does she love you better than I can? And there’s a big black sky over my town I know where you’re at, I bet she’s around And yeah, I know it’s stupid But I just gotta see it for myself I’m in the corner, watching you kiss her, I’m right over here, why can’t you see me? And I’m giving it my all //

Chapter 3: Billie Eilish – Bad guy

No feels, pure bop. This song is so BADASS, I really needed to get that vibe into the undercover mission, I didn’t want Reader to be an emotional mess and nothing else, you know?

Bonus: Tones and I – Dance Monkey

I shit you not, I’ve had that one on repeat for the dance scene. There is something incredibly seductive in that beat, I just couldn’t get it out of my head.

Bonus: Kings of Leon – Closer

It just makes my heart clench and leaves me breathless.

Chapter 4: Ben Platt – Bad habit

Ah, that was the moment when I cursed at myself for using Ease my mind for chapter 1, but we already talked about it.

Even though this song is very emotional, it’s not that heartbreaking, you can hear a faint smile here and there and it just makes my heart sing.

And oh my god, those lyrics:

//You always said that I’d come back to you again ‘Cause everybody needs a friend, it’s true Someone to quiet the voices in my head Make ‘em sing to me instead, it’s you Hate to say that I love you Hate to say that I need you Hate to say that I want you But I do Bad habit, I know But I’m needin’ you right now Can you help me out? Can I lean on you? Been one of those days Sun don’t wanna come out Can you help me out? Can I lean on you?//

They just work with that plot, you know?

Bonus: Dodie – Sick of losing soulmates

Another song that just resonates with the story.

//What a strange being you are, God knows where I would be If you hadn’t found me, sitting all alone in the dark A dumb screenshot of youth Watch how a cold broken teen Will desperately lean on a superglued human of proof

What the hell would I be, without you (what the hell would I be) Brave face talk so lightly, hide the truth (hide the truth)

'Cause I’m sick of losing soulmates, so where do we begin I can finally see, you’re as fucked up as me So how do we win?//

Chapter 5: Adele – Someone like you

The whole damn sunset scene + this song on repeat = feels

The pain in her voice? God, it just reduces me to a puddle of tears.

Reader could just sing it at some point to Neil almost word for word.

Bonus: Passenger – Let her go

Okay, the case of that one is quite funny, because I kinda needed to figure out how to get from point A to point B of the chapter, and I was browsing Spotify looking for „campfire songs” or something like that. Of course I’ve heard this one before, but I’ve never actually focused on the lyrics.

And oh boy, suddenly it all became clear.

Headcanon time – in my head, Wheeler and Neil are close friends, she treats him a bit like a younger brother, I just can imagine they know each other very well at that point. Of course she knows hows about his past. Of course she heard about Reader. And she thinks they are both silly babies and they should just kiss, right? That’s why she chooses that song.

Those lyrics – they fit Neil’s backstory so damn well.

//Only know you love her when you let her go

And you let her go//

And he was stupid enough to let her go. Because his timing was off.

Those lyrics are also perfect to make Reader think about his ex-girlfriend, because of course that is what you’re gonna it’s all about.

Bonus: Del Amitri – Tell her this

Ahh, there it is – the second out of three main songs for Stuck in Reverse.

I remember the moment I found out that Rob Pattinson sings and writes music, then I listened to some of the songs and my heart went whoooosh. So I just had to make Neil play a guitar, I just needed to find out what song would be The One.

Do you remember that flashback about them both watching a tv show on his couch? Here, you’re welcome. 

I recently started rewatching Scrubs and when I got to that episode – ding, ding, ding!

This is the ultimate “hey, I fucked up, I shouldn’t have let you go, I’m an idiot and I love you.”

Chapter 6: Imagine Dragons – Next to me

I adore that song. It warms my heart. I think it fits Neil and Reader’s relationship.

And I needed all the fluffy feelings to switch the tone of the story to something lighter.

Bonus: Michelle Branch – Everywhere

This one is a silly bop, and it always puts me in a good mood. A nice song to listen to when you are happy, in love, and you are making breakfast.

Bonus: Ashlee Simpson – Pieces of me

This one (same as the one before) came to me from Zach Braff’s workout playlist, haha. I mean I almost forgot about it, but it makes me smile every time I hear it, and the lyrics work nicely:

//On a Monday I am waiting Tuesday I am fading And By Wednesday I can’t sleep Then the phone rings I hear you And the darkness is a clear view Cause you’ve come to rescue me

Fall, with you I fall so fast I can hardly catch my breath I hope it lasts

It seems like I can finally Rest my head on something real I like the way that feels It’s as if you know me better Than I ever knew myself I love how you can tell All the pieces, pieces, pieces of me//

Bonus: Kaleo – I want more

Is there such a thing as a warm melancholy? Because that is a vibe I get from that song.

//Turn back, leave all you had Forgive, I’ll forget 'Cause what we need is what we once had Time won’t stand still Just say you will 'Cause I need you there and now

If you leap, I’ll come falling too Running deep 'til that rivers through I don’t mind what you have to do 'Cause I won’t think less, less of you

Yes, I want more, more Looking for more I want more, more 'Cause I want more

Old grounds Feels like the weight has been lifted away So don’t you leave me there wanting more//

Chapter 7: Ben Platt – In case you don’t live forever

I mean it’s not my fault that Ben’s songs make me FEEL things, damn it.

The whole damn song = utter heartbreak when you think about Neil coming back to Reader before he goes back to Stalsk-12 to open that damn lock.

//I, I’ve carried this song in my mind Listen, it’s echoing in me But I haven’t helped you to hear it We, we’ve only got so much time I’m pretty sure it would kill me If you didn’t know the pieces of me are pieces of you

I’ve waited way too long to say Everything you mean to me

In case you don’t live forever, let me tell you now I love you more than you’ll ever wrap your head around In case you don’t live forever, let me tell you the truth I’m everything that I am because of you//

Bonus: Charlene Soraia – Wherever you will go

Why am I doing this to you? Because we all like pain.

This one is for the scene on the deck:

//So lately, been wondering Who will be there to take my place When I’m gone you’ll need love to light the shadows on your face If a great wave shall fall and fall upon us all Then between the sand and stone, could you make it on your own

If I could, then I would I’ll go wherever you will go Way up high or down low, I’ll go wherever you will go

And maybe, I’ll find out A way to make it back someday To watch you, to guide you through the darkest of your days If a great wave shall fall and fall upon us all Then I hope there’s someone out there who can bring me back to you//

Bonus: Rhys Lewis – No right to love you

No light, only pain and suffering.

//'Cause I have no right to love you When I chose to walk away I have no right to miss you When I didn’t wanna stay And I have no right to need you And I knew what my heart was gonna lose I have no right to love you But I do, I still do Yeah, I still do//

Bonus: Knox Brown x Gallant – Reignite

This song is just so incredible, it makes my palms sweat and my mind going places. Yep, it was on repeat.

Oh you know which scene this one is for.

Bonus: Freya Ridings – Lost without you

The last dialogue. On repeat. Because this song breaks my heart and leaves me a sobbing mess.

//Strangers rushin’ past Just tryna get home But you were the only Safehaven that I’ve known Hits me at full speed Feel like I can’t breathe And nobody knows This pain inside me My world is crumbling I should never Let you go I think I’m lost without you//

(OI, SPOILERS) 

Chapter 8: Florence + The Machine – Never let me go

I have only one thing to say:

Fuck you, Nolan.

Third out of three.

//And it’s over and I’m going under

But I’m not giving up I’m just giving in

Oh, slipping underneath So cold and so sweet

In the arms of the ocean, so sweet and so cold And all this devotion, well, I never knew at all And the questions I have for a sinner released In the arms of the ocean deliver me

(Never let me go, never let me go Never let me go, never let me go)//

Bonus: Sasha Sloan - Dancing with your ghost

Suffer with me.

//Yelling at the sky Screaming at the world Baby, why’d you go away? I’m still your girl Holding on too tight Head up in the clouds Heaven only knows Where you are now

How do I love How do I love again? How do I trust How do I trust again?

I stay up all night Tell myself I’m alright Baby, you’re just harder to see than most I put the record on Wait 'til I hear our song Every night I’m dancing with your ghost Every night I’m dancing with your ghost//

[secretsofthedarkestkind-arch]

Ramble part 4 for season 1 episode 1. Twenty minutes left to go. The further I get into this I might be braver to move away so much from canon. I don’t really have faith in myself to write these characters but I’m going to try. At least some of them. 

As always triggers are tagged if I miss something please tell me.

Word count: 3,085-- longest one yet

Part One Part Two Part Three

@storieswrittcn​ (Tell me what you think, just don’t kill Caroline yet.)​

Lee was leaning against the lockers, her back and the sole of one converse touching the metal,  when the bell finally rang to dismiss the current class period. There wasn’t any reason to scurry off knowing if a teacher saw her she’d just get into more trouble. The brunette could have just left the building, gone back to the boarding house, but she actually wanted to see what Stefan was going to say. Of course, she didn’t want a lecture but to see him riled up somewhat gave her a thrill. She was bolder than she’d been when they were younger. Seventeen or even eighteen year old Lee wouldn’t have questioned authority like she just had. Seemed dear Stefan was the same. 

She’d seen the beginning fires of jealousy spark in his eyes due to the look Elena was giving her. The regret that it hadn’t been him to step up. Little did her brother know he didn’t need to worry. Lee had no interest in the young doppelganger, she was a knock off of the original. That didn’t mean she wouldn’t try to befriend her; out of necessity for what was to come and out of boredom. Besides, the toad needed to be put in his place. 

Stefan was one of the first out of the room, his features a mixture of sulking and pure anger. Lee didn’t fear the anger as she might have when she was still human. Her brother gripped her arm above her elbow, his enhanced strength stinging as his fingers dug into her skin. He might be weaker than she was because of his source of blood but that didn’t mean when he was angry his touch wasn’t enough to make her want to hiss. Lee didn’t though, refusing to give him that much satisfaction. 

He drug her away from the other prying eye, especially of two specific people, toward their own lockers. “What the hell was that?” Stefan snapped out, not so nicely pushing Lee against the metal. 

“Careful,” Lee warned, her own lips starting to curl into a snarl. “Your precious Elena is watching and you wouldn’t want her to start to think you’re violent on top of being a coward would you?” She taunts. Stefan looked from the corner of his eye to see Lee was in fact right. Bonnie and Elena had followed them but stood a few feet away both watching. The older sibling let go of her arm and opened his locker. “All I did was put that ass in his place. He was baiting people, just to belittle them when they failed. You know I can’t stand men like that.”

“You should have just left it. You’re lucky he didn’t do more than kick you out into the hall.” Stefan sighed, trying to pull his temper in.

“Lucky?” Lee asked more than amused. “Why? Because I was stirring things up? Please, Stefan. Me acting like a rebellious, disrespectful sixteen year old is not what Zach was talking about last night.” She rolls her eyes, “Don’t hide behind excuses like you always do.” 

Stefan slammed his locker closed, eyes narrowed at Lee who didn’t back down. “I don’t hide behind excuses.” The vampire ground out between clenched teeth.

“You do and you always have,” She took a small step closer, “Just as you’ve let the words of others guide your actions.” Excluding when you were a ripper, Lee thinks. 

“You’re just as bad as Damon.” Stefan looks her up and down, “Why did I think asking you for help was a wise decision?”

She’s about to tell him she’s more than likely worse than their elder brother when a throat clears behind them. Lee looks past Stefan’s shoulder to see Elena standing there with Bonnie. The young witch is giving Stefan a distrustful look while Elena seems almost hesitant to interrupt, books tucked tightly against her chest. “Hey,” Lee exhales, moving from the lockers to stand closer to the two girls. 

“Hey,” Elena says tucking some hair behind her ear. “I just--well, we really--wanted to say thank you.”

“What you did was pretty badass. I don’t think anyone has ever tried to take Mr.Tanner down a few pegs like that.” Bonnie gives Lee her attention.

Lee knows Stefan is hating the attention she’s getting, to be honest, she’s not enjoying it either. “You don’t have to thank me. He was pushing my buttons. His last gibe was just too much of a low blow to ignore. People like him piss me off.” Lee explains, “I would have done it even if his words hadn’t been directed at either of you.” She shrugs trying to brush the compliments off.

“Right,” Bonnie gives her a smile that is supposed to be knowing but couldn’t be farther from the truth. 

“You’re still coming to the falls tonight, right?” Elena asks almost hopefully.

“We are,” Stefan finally cuts in. Both girls look at him before waiting on Lee to answer.

“I told Caroline I’d be there, I try to always keep my word.” Lee adjusts the satchel over her shoulder.

“And Caroline is the only reason you’re going?” Bonnie asks. She’s as much trouble as Emily was, Lee can just feel it.

“More like for a beer and some music,” Lee counters. The brunette purposely grabs the strap of her satchel that’s across her chest with her left hand, hoping the two will see her daylight ring and take a damn hint. If they see it, they don’t say anything. The warning bell for next period rings out. “And with that, I’m off to art. I’ll see you all later.” 

-----

Lee can’t remember the last time she’d been to the falls and she didn’t think it had ever been for a party. With her cell phone in hand, the vampire looked through her closet once more. She wasn’t exactly wanting to draw attention to herself, more because yet again another day had gone by without Katherine replying. Lee knew it wasn’t because she was in danger. Niklaus was far enough from New York that it wasn’t a worry. No, her lover’s silence was likely due to the joke of a June wedding. It was only a seven hour drive from their loft in New York to Mystic Falls, Lee could only hope Katherine wasn’t planning on showing up this early.

But if she did, Lee didn’t want the attention of three teenage girls or more on her. “Presentable but understated,” She mutters, free hand reaching for a pair of darker gray skinny jeans tossing them on the bed behind her. “Not Daddy but not a slob.” Her eyes scanned her tops, grabbing a lighter grey tank top paired with a black and grey flannel. “Maybe a little daddy…” Lee can’t help the snort of laughter that follows. Katherine knew who she’d chosen to spend eternity with. She tosses the shirts back onto the bed also. “Shoes…” Lee wasn’t going to ruin a pair of converse just to get to the falls, “Maybe something a little less teenager….” She grabs a slimmer pair of black suede Timberland boots. “Perfect.”

-----

The music hit her ears before they could truly see the group of teenagers, “Aren’t they worried they’re going to get caught?” She questioned but didn’t expect an answer from Stefan. He’d been broody the rest of the day since their scene in the hallway. “Oh come on, you can’t ignore me forever.” Still nothing. “Just tell her, I’m not who she thinks I am. Not a lie,” Lee moves to walk backward so she can look at her brother. “Tell her, I’m an ass.” She holds up one finger, “That I’m...arrogant.” Another finger. “That I have too many walls to break down, that I’m already in a committed relationship.” Two more fingers. “Oh! If you really want to stop her, tell her that I still suck my thumb.” That caused a smile to start at the corners of his lips, “Still suck your thumb?”

“I don’t but she doesn’t need to know that.” Lee shrugs, she paused for him to catch up and linked their arms together. “I’m not Damon, Stef. I don’t want your girl. I have my own and I’d die before I ever thought of cheating on her.” Either by her own hand or Katherine’s.

“When am I going to meet this woman that’s stolen your heart?” Stefan asks, “It’s been how many decades now?”

“You might sometime soon. But for now, she stays a mystery.” Lee tells him. “Our family and loved ones don’t mix.”

----

They finally made it toward the picnic area, students everywhere. Lee un-linked her arm from Stefan’s to avoid being hit by an over enthusiastic jock who clearly was already three sheets to the wind. She looks around, taking it all in, briefly wondering what it would have been like to grow up like this. Her aunt used to say Lee  was a soul gifted long before her correct time. The brunette could see herself here, with these teens-- not worrying about running, family feuds that lasted over a century. This could have been her time. But it just hadn’t been. She swallows roughly, she’d been born when she had been so she could be on that train in 1862. She had to believe that. The alternative was depressing. 

Stefan came to a stop, Lee knew what he was doing and used her own hearing to try and find someone they’d know. “Just admit it, Elena.” Bonnie’s playful tone fills her ears, Lee taps Stefan’s arm.

“Oh, okay, so he’s a little pretty.” Elena seems to hesitantly admit. Lee turns to her brother with a smirk and an entertained glint in her eyes.

“Seems you’re perfectly fine in her eyes,” Lee teases, they both look until they find the girls by a bonfire.

“He has that romance novel stare.” Bonnie argues. Stefan starts to let a smile cross his lips and Lee laughs.

“That’s a new one,” She mutters.

“Stefan looked--” Lee stopped listening with a groan as Stefan’s smile grew. 

“And now I need something stronger than beer.” Stefan pushed her side lightly. “Come on lover boy, stop listening and start living.” He starts to follow after her when Caroline jumps in front of them.

“Hey, you made it!” Lee can see the joy in her eyes, over which one of them she isn’t sure yet. But the blonde is happy to see them.

Lee gives her a friendly smile, small nod of her head, her hands moving to tuck into her back pockets. “Yeah.”

“I did.” Stefan tells her, his own small smile on his lips, hands moving into his front pockets. They aren’t siblings at all.

“Well, let’s get you a drink.” Her attention solely on Stefan. Lee knows a train wreck is about to happen. Can see the gears turning in Stefan’s head about how to get out of this. Lee only prays he uses a little tact for this. 

“Well, I’m---” He tries to start.

“Oh, come on.” She grabs his hand from his pocket to tug him off. Stefan looks at her almost helpless.

“Rather you than me,” Lee mouths she can’t hide her mirth at the situation, but follows after them. Really just to find the drinks. 

She’s only a few steps behind them when she feels the air change, almost as if it’s electrically charged. Lee knows that feeling all too well, magic; uncontrolled, strong magic. The vampire stops, head snapping back to find Bonnie again. The scent feeling her nostrils telling her that it’s from the Bennett line. That kind of magic loose in a crowd of unsuspecting teenagers spells bad. Lee just starts to walk toward them when Bonnie jerks her hand away from the beer bottle where her hand had been resting on Elena’s.

“What?” Elena asks not knowing how to take the small moment they just had.

“That was weird,” Bonnie is overwhelmed. Her voice unsteady. “When I touched you, I saw a crow.” Those words stop Lee once more in her tracks. Damon…

“What?” Now Elena is the one starting to become overwhelmed. Lee can only imagine why, she’s been right all along.

“A crow.” Bonnie repeats as she tries to recall what she’d seen, “There was fog, a man.” Elena’s heartbeat skyrockets. She’s slightly panicking now. “I’m drunk. It’s the drinking,” Bonnie is trying to calm her friend down. “There’s nothing psychic about it.” She takes the bottle away from Elena. “Yeah? Okay. I’m gonna get a refill.” 

“Okay?” Elena isn’t sure what just happened. “Bonnie!” 

Lee cuts through the crowd, weaving until she’s at the young witch’s side. Bonnie jumps slightly. “Don’t do that,” She chuckles still unsteady, she goes to bump Lee but the vampire avoids it. She can’t let Bonnie accidentally pick up on something.

“Didn’t mean to scare you. You alright?” Lee asks genuinely concerned.

“What? Yeah!” Bonnie brushes her off. “Just getting a refill. Did you just get here?”

“Mm-hmm, Stefan got dragged away by Caroline. I was just on the hunt for a drink when I saw you. Care to show me where I can find that beer I mentioned earlier today?” She gives her a charming smile. 

Bonnie laughs with a nod, “Yeah, come on.” 

----

Stefan and Elena had disappeared off together, not something Lee hadn’t expected. But that did leave her alone with Caroline and Bonnie. They’d found themselves on one of the lower bridges talking. They didn’t seem like bad people. Bonnie was someone who truly cared about Elena, was a real best friend. The parallels between Katherine/Emily and Elena/Bonnie kept growing, but each set was vastly different. It almost sucked that when this was all over whatever friendship she built with the youngest Bennett would be ruined. 

Caroline though, Lee just hoped the teen made it out of this alive. The more time she spent with the blonde the more of a tortured soul Lee saw. To most the blonde would see selfish, conceded, overly flirty. But like the night before Lee saw something more. She was lost, no clue of where she belonged or if she did. She didn’t seem like anyone’s first pick, brushed aside for someone-- Elena-- else. She needed a friend that wouldn’t judge or use her for her social rank within the halls of Mystic Falls High.  “So is Elena really your brother’s type?”

Lee takes a long drag from her beer bottle, “I’m not really sure.” Partly true. The two hadn’t really been around each other long enough in decades for her to really answer that. But she did know Elena had his attention--if that was because she looked like Katherine or something more, Lee wasn’t sure. 

“How do you not know?” Bonnie asked outwardly doubting her.

“We don’t really do the whole deep talking thing,” Lee set her bottle down on the ledge behind her. “We don’t bond over girls. He does his thing and I do mine.”

“So you are…” Caroline starts but can’t seem to bring herself to finish what she’s assuming.

“Gay...lesbian?” Lee chuckles, “Yes, I am. If my clothes at times aren't enough of a giveaway.” Not that Lee dressed how she did to fit a stereotype. These clothes were just more comfortable; less suffocating and more her. She studies Caroline’s face, “Does that make you uncomfortable?”

“No!” Caroline jumps to reassure her, taking a step closer. “No, not at all.” She rests a hand on Lee’s arm.

“We’re open-minded,” Bonnie adds in. “We live in the year 2009. We might be in a small town, but that doesn’t mean we’ll judge you. Other people, can’t really say anything about them.”

Lee uses the arm Caroline is holding to grab her beer again, a sly way to get out of the grip, “That’s good to know.” 

“Do you have a type?” The blonde ventures, that flirtatious glint back.

“Caroline!” Bonnie chides.

Lee laughs again, “It’s alright Bonnie.” She takes a breath, “I’m already in a relationship.”

“Oh, I sense an epic love story,” Bonnie wiggles her eyebrows.

“Is she here in Mystic Falls?” Caroline doesn’t seem defeated yet, she’s going to see what her options are.

“Maybe,” Lee acknowledges Bonnie first. “And no,” Her eyes travel back to Caroline. “She’s not. We’re doing long distance at the moment.”

“That can’t be easy. Don’t you think you deserve someone who's right in front of you?” Caroline bites her lower lip.

The blonde is almost as bad as the Sommers’ girl back in 1864. God, Lee hopes Katherine isn’t anywhere near the falls. Lee raises a brow, “You’re shameless aren’t you?”

“Does that bother you?” Caroline takes a step closer and Lee can hear Bonnie mumbling something under her breath.

“No, it doesn’t.” Lee takes a step back, “But I love her.” Lee’s got to find a way to shut this down.

“Mysterious, badass, a charmer, and loyal even when there’s a chance she would never find out? She’s a lucky girl.” Bonnie cuts in and Lee is so thankful.

“I’m just me,” Lee mutters before taking another drink.

At that moment, Matt joins them. “I found them.”

“Hm?” Caroline hum slowly, turning her eyes away from Lee. “Who?”

“Stefan and Elena,” He nods to a bridge further up and all four turn to look.

“Cozy,” Lee comments.

“Romantic,” Bonnie throws out.

“Predictable.” Caroline grumbles.

Bonnie looks at Caroline as if she had two heads, “You were just all--”

“I know,” Caroline cuts her off. “Still, predictable.”

Lee turns away, she goes to say something when she hears Elena ask Stefan if he’s okay. Her head snaps back, trying to figure out what’s going on. Stefan moves away from the doppelganger.

“Oh, um…” He starts rubbing his eyes, face. “Yeah, no. It’s, um, it’s nothing.” He tries to explain away what Lee can only guess is his eyes changing. 

“Excuse me,” Lee sets her bottle down, starting to move away from the small group.

“Where are you going?” Caroline asks.

Lee points up to the two on the bridge, “Stef doesn’t seem the best.” She catches Bonnie’s eyes, “What’s the fastest way up there?” She could use her abilities but with how many people that are here someone would surely see.

“I’ll take you,” Bonnie reassures her.

“He seems fine now.” Matt breaks in. “He’s leaving her.”

Lee glances up to see Stefan moving away from Elena, “--get us a drink.” The younger Salvatore sighs. He’s got to get this shit under control.

[scottfuckingreed]

You don’t deserve him - Part Three

-

@fangirlafalways SAID: ‘you can’t be seriooous, I NEED part 3’

-

The reader feels slightly more at ease after the talk with Monty and Mr. Porter, but she still struggles through the day with both mental and physical obstacles. It’s soon clear that Scott is a guardian angel for the reader, and makes her feel something she hasn’t felt, possibly ever in her life.

-

Warnings!: swearing, Bryce is mentioned, gets quite fluffy, and there’s violence

I’d advise you to read part one and part two before this one

This part contains flashbacks so I’m sorry if it gets confusing

We got let out of the office together, awkward tension flooding out with us. I knew it wasn’t me, but Montgomery might think I told Porter, and that terrifies me. “It wasn’t-“ I go to say, but when his head shoots to me I freeze. “Baby of course it wasn’t you,” he walks towards me, rubbing me on the upper arm ‘to comfort me’. It does the opposite, making me feel super uncomfortable and tense up. “I can’t believe he’s actually accused me of touching you. As if I’d do that to my girlfriend.” I step back at his words. What goes through his mind? My blood starts boiling. Instead of fear, I get this rush of anger. “I’m not your girlfriend Monty,” a laugh leaves his mouth. “I’ve said before-“ “I know, ‘I don’t have a choice’. Fuck you,” and I walk away before he can do anything else. Who knows what is going through Monty’s mind, but, right now, I feel like I have more people on my side than he has on his.

I decide to start walking to class, taking a seat somewhere around Chloë. The teacher is talking about English, probably something important, but I find myself drifting into a bunch of memories... memories I shouldn’t even acknowledge anymore.

I start thinking about that day. He wasn’t always a total dickhead. It was early this year, when we went on our first date. Dollar Valentine is a big deal here, so when it comes to it almost everyone participates. Some boys like to ask girls out on dates to fuck around with them (sometimes literally), some like to genuinely try to get the girl. For some reason it’s almost always the boy asking the girl, like in any situation, but I was the one to ask Monty. You see, me and Monty we’re just friends. I’d talk to him pretty much every day, because - come on - look at the guy. He was absolutely gorgeous and misunderstood in my eyes. And we had a some sort of flirting thing going on. So, when I saw Monty’s name on my piece of paper, I thought ‘why not’. Now I’m just thinking ‘why’.

Start of Flashback

-

All that’s going through my mind is what if this ruins everything. I’ve always had a crush on Monty. From first sight, and now we’re somewhat friends, but man I’d love it to be something more. So - although he’s late - I wait at the cute little cafe. My heart freezes as I see him walk through the door, looking as good as always, and takes a seat in front of me. “I was beginning to think you wouldn’t show up,” I tease him. I watch as the smile grows on his face. “You know I wouldn’t do that to you.”

-

End of Flashback

I remember him being nervous. The nerves were literally radiating off of him. I think about that day a lot. I felt so unbelievably happy because I knew he felt the same - and when does that ever happen? So it takes a hell of a lot of influencing to change such a pure person. He was pure once. Once. He even walked me home that night. He said that he did it because it was the ‘right thing to do’, but I honestly believe that he just wanted to. We’d had such a nice date I don’t think either of us wanted it to end. Or maybe it was because we were alone. We were with everyone else so often that he was only truly himself - in my eyes - when it was just the two of us.

Everything from then on was perfect, as if it was a movie. The girl only gets the boy in movies, so I was shocked when it turned out that he liked me back. Endless times I’d dreamed about our first date, and it was somehow even more perfect than I could imagine, but it’s the best date we had. It was pretty much the only date we had throughout our whole relationship.

I try and concentrate on the teacher. I skipped school for 2 weeks after everything with Montgomery and I so I can’t afford to miss out on anything else. But I still find myself wondering and thinking and reminiscing on the days with Monty. The good, and the bad. Unfortunately, the bad outweighs the good, because about 2 months after our first date was when it all started to go downhill. In high school, 6 months is a long time. And the first 2 months were exactly how I imagined. Just perfect. We were taking it slow, and for some reason Bryce thought it was a bad thing.

Start of Flashback

-

Bryce’s house is insane! Just walking up to the place was unbelievable, but sitting in his front room and just being in the house is just... wow. So we’re sat around: me, Monty, Bryce, Zach and Scott. I was having a great time, sitting with my boyfriend and laughing with his friends. Maybe one day it’ll be as if they’re my friends too. “Okay, we’re all thinking the same thing,” Bryce starts, making all of us shoot our heads to him. “How far have you two gone?” The question is thrown at us. I’m sat on Monty’s lap so I can feel as he tenses up. What’s the big deal? We’ve been close to having sex a few times, but each time something wasn’t right, so we just haven’t done it yet. It’s not a big deal though... is it? “I don’t think they’ve done it,” Scott whispers, loud enough for us all to hear. “Or maybe they’re keeping it from us,” Zach adds. “Maybe we wanna keep it to ourselves,” I feel as Monty lets out a breath, as if he’s relieved at my words. “That’s sounds like what a virgin would say,” Bryce laughs loudly. “You seriously think she’s a virgin? I can’t keep my hands off of her,” Monty’s words sting. I’ve never heard him talk like this about me. It’s so strange and sudden, I’m not sure what to think. “I mean, look at her, what would you do in my shoes?” “You know exactly what I’d do,” Bryce winks my way. I stand up to go get a drink to remove myself from the situation, and feel a hand go to my ass.

I feel someone come up behind me in the kitchen, and just stand there. So I slowly turn to see Monty stood there with a guilty face. “I’m sorry Y/N, but you know what Bryce is like-“ “That wasn’t Bryce!” I whisper angrily. “He would’ve said a lot worse. You should be thanking me,” his calm voice angers me even more. Does he not understand why I’m angry about this? “Are you kidding me?” It’s only been 2 months, we shouldn’t have to rush anything. “If we’d just have sex this wouldn’t even be happening right now,” he sighs under his breath. “But, no, I had to choose a virgin.”

-

End of Flashback

Clap. I lift my head up off the desk to see my English teacher stood in front of me with a cross look on her face. “Pay attention miss Y/L/N,” she shouts. I look around to see almost everyone looking at me, but I especially notice Scott looking worried from a few seats away. “Can I just go-“ I try to leave, to remove myself just to clean myself up. “No! You’ve been somewhere else this whole lesson!” Anger doesn’t describe how she must’ve been feeling. “Shes crying! Just let her go,” I hear Scott pipe up. I didn’t even realise. My face was flooded, wiping them away slowly. I feel everyone’s eyes on me, making my stomach turn, so I just get up and leave the classroom.

I spent over an hour just sat in the girl’s toilets. Thinking about the past was no longer a option, not anymore. The thought of it is tiring and pointless. It’s not like it’s ever gonna change. What’s done is done. Thankfully, the bell for the end of the day rings, meaning I can go home. I go to leave the school ground and notice two faint body in the distance rolling around on the floor. High school is so pathetic. I bet it’s some petty argument between two boys. I bet it means nothing.

I’m only in my house for a few minutes when my phone starts to ring. “Hey Scott,” I smile as I answer. It feels like I haven’t seen him all day. “Hey, is it alright if I come over?” His voice is a whisper, but I take no notice of it. “I guess, is everything okay?” He usually just turns up at my house, so to hear him actually ask is strange. “Yeah. I just need some help with something.” Something was off with Scott. I could hear it in his voice, and I could feel it through the phone. He’s forever asking if I’m okay, comforting me, so whatever’s up with him I’m gonna help him as best as I can.

I’m completely shocked and hurt at the sight in front of me. Scott was covered in blood and bruises. My heart shatters at the look of him, so much that I feel my eyes start to fill up with tears. “No, no, I’m fine. I just need help cleaning it up before I go home,” he spoke with a smile, but it did nothing but made me feel even worse. I watch as he slowly moves, trying not to move too much, and takes a seat in the kitchen. “Hey, take this off,” I say quietly, tugging at the bottom of his t shirt. It was soaked through with blood, and I was praying it was from the blood dripping off his face. “Woah Y/N, we haven’t even been on a date,” to hear him still joke around while in this state was somewhat comforting, but as he removes his top the comfort disappears. He really wasn’t fine. His ribs were somewhat purple, and there was a few grazes that were leaking blood. I let out a heavy breath. “I don’t understand why this had to happen to you,” I let out a single tear, wiping it instantly. I begin to dab a wet cloth over the grazes on his chest as gently as I can. “Apparently when you whack a guy over the head with a baseball bat he wants to hit you back,” I can hear him wince between words, making me want to stop what I’m doing. I should’ve known this was Monty.

“This is what I was afraid of,” I state. I’d somehow cleaned up his chest and was starting to sort out his face. The blood was dry now, but he still had smudges across his face that needed clearing up. “I’m not gonna let him hurt you. Never again,” I believe his words, but that’s not what I mean. “You don’t deserve this Scott!” I shout angrily, but I’m not angry at him. I was more angry at myself. How did I let this happen? I don’t care about what happens to me, I just don’t want Scott to get hurt any more than he already has. “I can handle a few punches,” he sounded stubborn, but I still proceed to place a bag of peas on the right side of his face. “You shouldn’t have to.” I hated what I was thinking, but it would solve everything. “If I get back with Monty everything will be fine. He’ll leave you alone, and everything will be normal.” His face must be hurting less, as I see him begin to frown my way. “There’s no way that’s happening. You honestly think I’m gonna let him even go near you. You don’t deserve him Y/N! Not now. Not ever.” I spread my free hand through my hair, moving it from my face. “It’ll fix everything,” it was only a whisper, but it was all I could let out. I’m exhausted of this. I don’t want to have to see him like this. “It won’t fix you. Please Y/N, let me fix you,” like a song, those words sung to me.

He was all fixed up. Don’t get me wrong, he still looked bashed and battered. But there was less blood, only scabs, and the frozen peas had calmed down the slight swelling on his face. We were now just waiting for his top as I had put it in the wash, and I had just finished telling Scott about my encounter with Montgomery today. “What about English? Why were you upset?” I shrug. I shouldn’t of been upset. It was nothing but memories. “I was just thinking about Monty and how he used to be. I know he’s hurt me and I’ll never forgive him for it, but I don’t think he’s necessarily a bad guy.” I watch as he shakes his head. “How do you still think that?” He laughs in disbelief. I hear the tumble drier finish drying Scott’s top, so I turn around and go sort it out.. “I just think he needs the right person to change him. That person just wasn’t me.” Was a stupid to still believe that? Probably. As I turn around to give him his top back, I see Scott giving me a look that I haven’t ever before in my life. Not at me anyway. “What’s the look for?” For some reason, my stomach is filled with butterflies at this moment. “I just think Monty’s missed out on a good one,” blushing, I pass him his top and we start to walk towards my front door. “He doesn’t think so-“ “I know so.” We stand there for a second with the door wide open. I look up to him, trying not to smile so I press my lips together. “Does it still hurt?” Scott replies with a ‘meh’ sound as if it was nothing and he was overreacting. “As long as you’re fine, I’m fine,” I smile massively at him. “Can you please stop? You’re being nicer than usual,” I can’t be doing this. My face was aching from smiling too much. “I want to be the one to make you happy,” it seems like all I’ve done is smile and shake my head since he’s got here, but I shake my head at him again. “That’s not your job,” I push him on his back out the door. “I’m making it my job. You hardly smiled with Monty, and you’re somehow prettier when you smile, so I’m gonna make it my mission to be the one to make you smile.”

[raisingsupergirl]

A New Age Dawning

I once met a Freemason who said he changed his career ever seven years, a concept he based on the seventh sabbatical year of the Old Testament. And it wasn’t like he moved to a different position within the same career field. He made drastic changes: professor, salesman, laborer, etc. And in different parts of the country, too. At first, I thought he was lying. Then I thought he was running from something. But in the end, I envied him. We only get one life, so why spend it working toward a singular goal, no matter how grand? Why not reinvent yourself? Who wouldn’t jump on the chance to be reborn? And that idea stuck with me in a subtle way until I ran across it again in my Bible reading about a year ago. The year of Jubilee, it’s called. A year in which all debts are forgiven, all land is returned to its original owners, and everyone starts anew. Once every seven years. And do you know what’s a multiple of seven? Thirty five, which is exactly what I was going to be turning the next year. And not a moment too soon. You see, my life has been a series of seven-year “ages” in which I’ve grown and found new exciting experiences, but at the end of each age, I become anxious, bogged down with mundane frustration until I finally burst through into some new adventure. And like any good adventure, mine started with the First Age…

The First Age: Ignorance (0-7)

The first seven years of my life are my mobile home memories. A little trailer home on Dorlac Road. Avoiding cactuses in our dirt basketball court. Digging through overgrown lily pads and cattails to get to our fishing hole. Going to daycare with the lady who played the piano and the man who threw a fake duck to his Golden Retriever. And family. So much family. The four of us boys crammed onto the broke-down couch and drawing funny faces on TV Guide pictures. Mom cooking a four-pound meatloaf to feed us. Watching my older brothers play Zelda and Punch Out and Techmo Superbowl. Going fishing at the Mississippi river with Grandpa Winch. Watching baseball with Grandpa Collins. Playing Ninja Turtles and Dungeons & Dragons with my cousins. Being mad when everyone went to Grandma’s and had chicken pox, but I wasn’t allowed to go and have any for some reason. You see, Grandma was the BEST cook, and I was SURE Chicken Pox were delicious. Because at that time, I didn’t understand it. Any of it. All lights and colors and awe-inspiring mystery. But when I turned eight, my parents began taking us to this other place. A spot in the woods. And we started cutting down those woods, clearing a space big enough for a castle. And men came out and blew up the ground, making a big hole. Walls went up. So many walls. And then mom said I had to start going to school. Away from my family. Away from everything I knew. But there was one thing I knew then: Fear.

The Second Age: Innocence (7-14)

I remember my first night in the new house. How could anyone keep from getting lost in such a place. It was so dark, quiet, and cavernous. I got a cat soon after that, and he felt the same way. Skittish, hidden, afraid. I named him Kitty. Kitty was my first real pet, and he was one of my closest friends through that Second Age. But slowly, something started to happen within me. I started to realize that the new house wasn’t scary. The new house was warm, solid, enduring, safe. Even the woods around us were peaceful and inviting. Our pond didn’t have any lily pads or cattails. But it did have catfish. Huge ones. And they bit best at night on doughballs. The deepest parts of the woods had caves and bluffs and creeks. And I could wander as long as I wanted without a watch or a compass, and somehow I’d always end up back at home just before dark.

School wasn’t so bad, either. I was nice to the kids, and they were nice back. I even made some friends who lived within bike-riding distance. I think Greg and Zach were the first. They were older, but they lived on the same gravel road. And they liked cards. Not the boring ones that my brothers liked—the ones about sports. No, these new cards had superheroes on them. And some of them were games that let you BE a superhero and fight against your friends’ superheroes. They brought my Saturday morning cartoons to life, and my love for fantasy and imagination started to blossom. I met Brandon next. He was a new kid on the bus, and he had a cool toy. He became my best friend for many years. Together we explored the wilderness, conquered the FIRST Warcraft game, and discovered girls. And as I approached the end of the Second Age, a dark, hormonal shadow spread over my life of innocence.

The Third Age: Independence (14-25)

Middle school. I shouldn’t have to explain further, but I will. My friends grew armpit hair, and I didn’t. My friends made the basketball team, and I didn’t. My friends paired up with girlfriends, and I didn’t (except that one time when Elizabeth Stroble let me cut in the lunch line by her). I found purpose in football, and I found God at Bates Creek church camp. A girl said she liked me in high school, so I started dating her. Then she cheated on me with my previously-mentioned best friend. It was then, at the peak of puberty’s angst, that I first felt heartbreak. I forgave them both and remained friends with them. I then met some more lifelong friends of the most interesting kind—skaters. There was something about them that I identified with. Not the skating (I lived on a gravel road, remember?). But they were honest, raw, adventurous, unafraid. A little broken, but also honest and loyal. And they all had the best senses of humor. I was friendly toward everyone in high school (even nominated for “most congenial”), but it was with those skaters that I learned to really push the boundaries of my reality.

This epic Age, extending through college to a couple years beyond, was the most adventurous and transformative of my life. There’s so much to tell. My first drink of alcohol (a “hey, mister” bottle of Jack Daniels in the back of my friend’s van). Wild parties that ALWAYS ended with deep conversations. Cruising the strip in my red 1995 Camaro. A heart-wrenching breakup with my second girlfriend, which left both mental and physical scars. Finding true peace in my empty college bedroom with a cup of tea, a candle, and my first copy of The Fellowship of the Ring. And then finding my love of reading, writing, and LEARNING. Education was a concept that had been forced down my throat throughout school, so I never realized I actually LOVED learning new things until it became an option. But it wasn’t long into my college career when I started devouring philosophy, history, religion, and fantasy of all kinds. And then I met my future wife in a bowling alley, and everything changed. She wasn’t from my hometown. She didn’t know any of my family or my childhood friends. She had no interest in fantasy books or emo music. She was an enigma and an emotional mess. And she was perfect. From that point on, I plowed through the middle of the Third Age. My future wife graduated from college, I graduated the following year, and that summer, I passed my Boards, married the love of my life, went on my first vacation outside of the country (a blissful honeymoon to Cancun), and moved from Missouri to Virginia Beach to start my first “adult” job as a physical therapist. And just like that, I found myself sitting on a beach next to my wife, 1,000 miles from home.

It’s odd that it would take getting married to feel true independence. But college was just an evolution of high school. And in Virginia, the only person I knew was my wife, and I barely knew her. So as you can imagine, the next couple of years were hard. I had no big brothers or parents to show me how things were done. No friends to vent to. No familiar pets or woods to feel perfectly at home. No, this was an entirely new adventure for my new wife and me. We fought, we cried, we kissed, we fought some more, and we didn’t think we were going to make it. And then, one night after my shift at Busch Gardens Howl-o-Scream (yes, I moonlighted as a 6’5” axe-wielding zombie), I received a call. Well several calls, actually. And all of them said I needed to call home. Dad had been in a car accident. He was dead.

The next year was a blur. The darkest of my life. Gray. That’s all I remember. Grayness, confusion, doubt, hopelessness. I felt overworked and underqualified at a miserable job surrounded by immaturity, manipulation, and spite. I let the unresolved depression from losing my father destroy my relationship with my wife. And finally, at my wits end, I dragged said wife back home to Farmington (not my WIFE’s home, mind you. And that fact plagued our relationship for many years). Thus ended our time at Virginia Beach and the longest Age of my life.

The Fourth Age: Interlude (25-28?)

If the Third was the longest age, the Fourth was the shortest. From twenty-five to twenty-eight, in the wake of tragedy and what felt like betrayal, I slipped back into the comfort of things I knew. I found healing in writing—transforming memories and ideas into worlds and adventures that couldn’t harm me the way the real world had—and I was actually good at it! I also started work at my hometown clinic with my physical therapy mentor, which meant I was suddenly surrounded by people who knew everything about me. They UNDERSTOOD me. They comforted and uplifted me. For that I am forever grateful. But my dependance on the past also nearly broke the bond my wife and I had begun to forge in Virginia. She was jealous that I was home. I was jealous that she still had both parents. But slowly, after a lot of tears and a few broken pieces of furniture, we found each other again. There was no single epiphanous moment, but the defining word between us was commitment. Commitment to God and commitment to each other. Life started regaining some of its color, and I started trusting again. And then, after coming home from a hunting trip with my brothers one weekend, my wife told me she was pregnant.

The Fifth Age: Inquisition (28-35)

Gosh, what a whirlwind. My daughters’ stories are written in detail on this blog, so I won’t rehash them, but talk about nonstop adventure! In some ways, this has been the best Age of my life, but as I neared its end, the horizon again grew dark.

You see, through earlier tragedy and hardship, I had developed an, “If it is to be, it’s up to me,” mentality. Mostly because there were some unfortunate things that I couldn’t control but there were so many that I could. And it seemed like anything I really set my mind to was attainable. I’d landed my dream job. I’d also written novels, and those novels were getting closer and closer to publication. But slowly, my dream job became a monotonous chore, and my fledgling writing career started hitting one dead end after another. To the point where my literary agent finally broke ties, and after writing five novels, I didn’t have the strength to write another one. And tragically, I let those facts define me.

Of course, it’s such a tragedy because I was finally living a fruitful life with my wife and two super girls! On top of that, I’d become a freemason and met more lifelong friends, and toward the end of the Age, I’d embarked on a nearly year-long introspective journey with five other Christian men. But none of that mattered because I didn’t know who I was. I’d failed at writing, my “day job” became a drain on my spirit, and no matter how much I tried, there didn’t seem to be an end in sight.

And here we are. On the cusp of a new age. Last week, I finished my last meeting with those five amazing Christian men, and they have saved me. Truly. Well, they have helped me back to God’s purpose in my life: Achieving Adventure. Before that, I was dying inside, and I didn’t know why. I HAD to achieve something. ANYTHING (as if a wife, kids, and a successful career weren’t enough). But the ruts were so deep that finding a new path felt impossible. Too late in the game. Another has-been who had come so close but ultimately wasted all of his God-given potential. Talk about a classic mid-life crisis. And then came those 6 a.m. meetings. The conversations will likely fade into distant memory, but the effects will stay with me forever. Those men helped me realize what I’ve been chasing my whole life: adventure, exploration, the unknown. I LOVE learning, remember? I love growing. Not achieving, just growing. And the energy that burst from that realization has pushed me out of my ruts. It’s renewed my passion for physical therapy to the point where I’ve landed a promotion that promises new adventures. And my passion for writing, though still not quite renewed, is starting to flicker in my soul again. I have my strongest manuscript back in my hands, professionally edited and full of potential. Even if it’s never published, I will soon dive back into that adventure of my own creation. And that’s not all.

Next week I will attend my final meeting as Master of Farmington Masonic Lodge #132, and I will thank those Freemason brothers for an amazing five-year adventure that I will forever be grateful for. On that same day, I will celebrate the ribbon cutting of a new physical therapy clinic, and I will act as it’s clinic coordinator. Soon, my family and I will move to a new home—a place with explorable woods and a blank canvas of possibility.

The Sixth Age: Untitled

I have no clue what this Sixty Age will bring. I don’t know how many more Ages I’ll get to experience after that. But as I write this, I find myself smiling. The mystery fuels me, and my anxiety finally feels more like excitement again. I’m on a new adventure, and I get to take it with my three best friends: my wife is more of a trusted and true co-pilot than ever, my nearly four-year-old is in the midst of her blissful Age of Ignorance, and my seven-year-old is on the cusp of her own Second Age! What a time to be alive.

I’m about to enter the Sixth Age, friends. Another chapter of my life. And I can’t wait to share the adventure with you.

[animegirl266]

My Little Angel||Zach Herron||Why Don’t We Imagine

Prompt: “I’m pregnant.”

Warning: Just some friendly swearing :)

You sit on your bed next to Zach, one foot crossed under your other thigh. Your hand rests in his lap, his thumb brushing its back methodically. Your head hangs down, your hair falling in your face. 

“What’s wrong, princess?” You look up at him, your eyes wet with tears. 

“I’m pregnant.”

*7 months later*

You rive in pain, your breathing heavier than it has ever been. All you want to do is close your eyes and rest for weeks, but Zach’s hand in yours squeezes tight, keeping you conscious. You watch from afar as a nurse, Hazel, wipes down your daughter with a wet cloth, and wraps her in a white blanket. She walks over to you and puts her in your arms. 

“She’s beautiful.” Hazel says, smiling before walking away with the doctor, leaving only you, Zach, and your mother in the room. You look down at your daughter, a smile blooming on your face. You take in her little, shriveled eyes, her small wrinkled fingers, and suddenly, all the pain goes away. You can only think about this tiny baby in your arms. 

“Hi baby. Hi Melody.” You whisper, stroking your daughter’s cheek with the back of your finger. 

You can’t stop smiling, your fingers tickling her under her chin, her laugh echoing in your ears. She reaches out to your hand and wraps her tiny, little fingers around your index finger. Tears fall from your eyes to your cheeks as you stop yourself from sobbing. After nine long months, you finally had your baby.

You cradle her, bouncing her ever so slightly. After holding her for what felt like hours, you feel Zach’s hand on your shoulder. You smile up at him, the tears in his eyes. 

“You should get some rest.” He says, not taking his eyes off your daughter for a second. 

“Yeah. Do you want to hold her?” He nods, his arms reaching out for the girl he’s waited months and months to see. You watch as he takes her, instantly missing the feel of her in your arms, but you find yourself smiling as the man you love kisses your daughter’s forehead. She lets out a little noise that makes you want to laugh and cry at the same time. You dose off the sleep, the last thought in your head being It was worth it. 

Zach opens the door to your two-story house in Beverly Hills, Melody sleeping in your arms. He gestures for you to go in first, putting a hand on your lower back to steady you. Zach closes the front door and turns on the light. Unable to tear your eyes away from your daughter, you barely notice when the WDW boys and Christina jump out from behind your living room furniture. 

“Congratulation!” They shout, making your flinch. You take a deep breath and shush them, gesturing to Melody, now stirring in her sleep. They all whisper and quick sorry before you make your way to Melody’s room. You walk in, looking at the lilac walls. You remember the day that you walked into this room to find Zach painting the walls, lilac on his black shirt and smudged on his face. You remember the day you two had bought the crib. You sat on the floor, reading the instructions aloud to Zach as he tried to assemble it. Of course, he kept on doing it wrong so you ended up calling Jonah to help you instead. You remember coming home and finding bags and bags of toys and stuffed animals littering the floor. You had asked Zach about them and all he did was shrug saying, “I might have gotten a little carried away...”

You lay Melody in the crib, careful not to snag your wedding ring on the blankets. You turn on the baby monitor sitting beside her in her crib. Poking her nose lightly, you make a little boop noise under your breath. Smiling, you trot down the stairs to join your friends. You look around the living room, a ‘It’s a girl!’ poster hanging above the fireplace, presents scattered across the coffee table, pink and purple balloons tied to the furniture.

Christina is the first to run over and give you a hug, her chin resting on your shoulder. “Congrats, Y/N/N. I’m so happy for you!” She pulls away, still holding you by your arms. “It probably hurt like a bitch, huh?” She asks, making a pained expression. 

“You don’t know the half of it.” You say, shaking your head side-to-side. She cringes and the two of you laugh, her snort making you laugh even harder. Zach and Corbyn stand at attention at the sound of yours and Christina’s laughter. From the corner of your eye, you see them smiling. When you and Christina break apart, Daniel, the boy you now see as your best friend, makes a beeline for you, wrapping you in a huge bear hug. 

“I am so proud of you! I can’t wait to hold her.” You giggle into Daniel’s chest, not wanting to let go.

“I’m sure you will soon enough. Her naps usually only last a couple of hours until she gets hungry again.” You, Zach, and Melody had to spend an extra day in the hospital because the doctor was worried you weren’t healing properly. After running a few tests, they cleared you, and the three of you left the following day. 

After the rest of the boys hugged you and said their congrats, the seven of you plopped down on the couch, at least three different conversations filling the room. Zach sits next to you, draping an arm over your shoulder. You lean into him, your head resting in the crook of his neck as you talk to Daniel and Jonah. Zach rubs your arm, going up and down, warming your skin. You love his touch. Everything felt right when he was next to you. 

Not an hour later, Melody’s crying screeches through the baby monitor. You rip yourself off the couch and hurry up the stairs. After feeding her, you bring her downstairs to meet everyone. Right when you come into view, Daniel shoots up from his seat and raises his hand in the air. “I call holding her first!”

Zach watches you giggle as you hand Melody over to Daniel. He can tell that you’re nervous about Daniel holding her; that your protective, motherly instincts are kicking in. He watches as you try to decide whether to sit beside Daniel of beside him, wanting to trust Daniel but also wanting to be right there if Melody needed her. Zach slides an arm around you, resting a hand on your hip as you perch yourself on his lap, watching Daniel and Melody closely. 

Daniel holds her tight, tickling her feet. “Hi Melody. I’m Uncle Daniel. Can you say Uncle Daniel?” He asks playfully, his voice higher than normal. You let out a breathy laugh, a smile playing on your lips. 

“She can’t say anything, Dani. She’s on two days old.” Daniel looks up at you and narrows his eyes. 

“If you think that that’s going to stop me from trying, then you are sadly mistaken,” He looks back at Melody. “Uncle Daniel. Say it. Un-cle Dan-i-el.” Corbyn laughs, leaning back into Christina. 

“That’s not gonna help, bro.” He manages, shaking his head. 

That night, after everyone leaves, you stand at the sink, washing the dishes from dinner, Zach in the living room on his phone. You hear Melody through the baby monitor, her crying starting once again. You sigh, dragging a wet hand down your face. You’re about to turn off the water and head upstairs when you see Zach getting up from his place on the couch, slipping his phone into his back pocket. 

“I’ve got it, babe.” He says, a half-smile on his lips. You mouth a ‘thank you’ and turn back towards the sink. 

When you’re done, you dry your hands and walk up the stairs to the nursery. You put your hand on the door-frame, the room dark. After your eyes adjust, you see Zach holding Melody, him looking into her eyes. You lean against the wall, arms crossed over your chest. 

“Sh shh, Melody. It’s okay, baby. Daddy’s got you,” He bounces her slightly, her head resting in the crook of his arm. Her eyes start to droop closed, her moans turning into soft whimpers. “That’s my girl,” He rocks her until she’s fast asleep, her breaths evening into a steady rhythm. You walk over to him, putting your hand on his back. He looks at you then back to Melody. “This... this is our daughter, Y/N. Our baby girl.”

“I know. She’s perfect.” You say in a hushed voice, your hand finding her little toes through her onesie. 

“No matter what happens, we’ll love you forever.” Zach says it like an oath, something that she’ll remember until her last breath. “I’ll protect you, my Melody.” It’s as if he forgot you’re in the room, like it was just him and the child nestled in his arms. You smile, planting a kiss on his cheek before walking into the hall.

*10 months later*

You sit on a couch, Melody in your lap. The WDW boys stand in front of you, rehearsing their new songs for their up-coming concert. You gently hold Melody’s wrists, waving her arms in time with the music. Melody laughs, her giggles louder in your ears than the boys’ music. When the song ends, you clap Melody’s hands. 

“Yay Daddy!” You say, smiling at your daughter, bouncing your legs so she shakes up and down. The boys smile, all looking at their little niece. 

“Dada!” The room falls silent. Tears prick your eyes. Zach kneels beside you and you turn Melody around to face you. 

“What did you say, honey?” You ask, smiling down at her. 

“Dada!” She exclaims again, making tears roll down your cheeks. You let out a breathy laugh, covering your mouth with a hand. Zach’s breathing quickens as a huge smile blooms on his face. 

“Yes! Dada!” He says, pointing at his face. Melody claps, looking at her dad. 

“Dada! Dada!” She points, poking his cheek. He picks her up, twirling her around. The boys have their phones out, recording. 

“Melody just said her first word!” Corbyn shouts, all four of them cheering. Jack falls onto the couch next to you, the camera turned to face both of you. 

“How do you feel about this, Mom?” He says, his curls touching your cheek. You just let the tears fall, shaking your head. 

“Amazing.” You manage, your voice breaking. 

“Awwwe!” Jack pulls you into his chest, hugging you tight. The rest of the boys follow suit, a group hug squishing you on the couch. Jonah grabs a tissue and hands it to you. Wiping your nose, you watch Zach hold up Melody, resting his forehead against hers. 

“My little angel.” He whispers, his eyes closed. Melody pulls away, grabbing his nose in her hand and squeezing it. 

“Dada! Honk honk!” She laughs, snorting adorably.

“I love you, baby.”

[shirtlesssammy]

The End: 5x04 Recap

Welcome to the episode that launched a thousand fanworks! There’s so much hinted and untold story between the present and future in this episode. It’s no wonder it’s a favorite for many people to rewatch, and a popular platform from which to launch stories.

Now:

The brothers are still on their own paths towards the apocalypse, and Dean, done with his super platonic buddy time with Cas, pulls up to a motel to crash for the night. A street preacher pesters Dean about God’s plan. Once in his motel room, Dean chats with Cas about the Colt. Cas has a lead on the gun but Dean needs to sleep. Cas is suspicious. God, he’s cute here.

Dean’s phone rings again. This time it’s Sam. Sam is Lucifer’s vessel. Dean acts indifferent and jaded to their current reality. Sam wants back in. Dean gives Sam his sob story of how they don’t work together - they’re weaker when they’re together; they’re better off apart. He says goodbye to his brother, and any hope of stopping the apocalypse.

The next morning, Dean awakens to a spring mattress under him, no cell coverage, and an eerily empty post-apocalyptic world.

Dean wanders the streets which are dirty, derelict, and devoid of humans. In an alleyway, he finds a little girl and asks, “Are you hurt?”

She’s hurt, but more like hurt in the brain hurt, and she lunges at Dean like a rabid zombie. Dean punches the little girl (and we cheered.) It’s only then that he sees the words “Croatoan” spray painted on a wall.

Just then the local Croatoan street gang makes an appearance. Dean takes off with them in hot pursuit. Dean runs into a fence, his fate seemingly sealed, but unknown forces appear and open gunfire, blasting “Do You Love Me”. (I love this moment - it’s disjointed but so perfect. Dean is completely clueless at this point -- we we are as well. The music and bullets set this odd tone of military bravado in a topsy-turvy world.) Dean escapes through the fence and sees a quarantine sign:

It’s so weird to think that this episode is 3 years in the past! This show! May it last forever!

Dean hotwires a car and as he’s traveling down the road, Zachariah joins him for a little tête-à-tête. Zach gives Dean the low down on the state of the world in 2014 (not as bad as 2017, amirite?). He also tells Dean he’s going to make him marinate in this hellish nightmare for 3 days. He’s going to learn why he needs to say ‘yes’ to Michael.

Dean heads to Bobby’s. It’s dark and deserted, and he finds Bobby’s wheelchair with bullet holes. He jimmies open the fireplace safe and finds a picture of a group of men - Bobby and Cas included - at a Camp Chitaqua. Dean makes it to camp in the blink of a commercial break, and quickly sees the rusted shell of the Impala. “Oh, Baby, no.” He walks to the third lead inanimate object that drove him from point A to point B, and is knocked out from behind - by himself! Dun-dun-dun!

Dean comes to, chained to a post, with Future!Dean watching him, gun trained on him.

Future!Dean wants an explanation - Dean tells him that Zachariah sent him 5 years into the future. Future!Dean demands our Dean to tell him something only he would know. Dean confesses his time with Rhonda Hurley and her infamous pink, satiny panties. Like, this is possibly the most intimate thing we will ever know about Dean. Much has been made of this moment from us, but at this time, between the two Deans, Future!Dean now knows he’s dealing with himself, and all that comes with it. He tells Dean about the spread of the Croatoan virus, and how the world fell apart once the virus spread two years prior. And he tells Dean, “Heavyweight showdown in Detroit. From what I understand, Sam didn’t make it.” They hadn’t talked in 5 years.

Future!Dean needs to make a Target run, so Dean is going to stay nice and hidden away from the gen pop at Camp Chitaqua. Future!Dean should know himself better, as Dean works himself free with minimal effort.

As a newly free Dean wanders the camp, Chuck finds who he thinks is the camp leader and informs Dean of the camp’s dwindling toilet paper supply, and ponders what they should do before wondering if Dean is supposed to be on a mission. Dean gets to dodge that tricky question, but doesn’t dodge a blow from Risa. It appears he spent the night with Jane, despite his “connection” with Risa. And apropos of nothing, Dean asks if Cas is around. Interesting segue, Dean. Chuck will never guess your train of thought because they all know of your “connection” with Cas already.

Dean heads to Cas’s cabin and finds End!Cas in all his drug fueled, hippy-dippy, orgy-leading, non-labelled beauty. I’m hard pressed to choose a favorite version of Cas, but this is the version I find most interesting. Dean’s a bit nonplussed.

Cas picks up that Dean isn’t the Dean from his time (How does he do that if he’s human now. Insert <we just don’t know gif>) Dean asks for his angelic help, but Cas laughs. “What are you, stoned?” Dean wonders.

“Generally, yeah.” Oh Endverse!Cas, never change.

Future!Dean and his errand crew make it back to camp. They break open the celebratory brewskies (ok, there’s still beer in End!verse? How bad can it be?) Future!Dean then pops a bullet in his fellow comrade’s head before Dean’s warning can prevent it. The others in the crew now see two Deans and Future!Dean admits, “it’s a pretty messed up situation we got going.” (I love the meta on this statement being about Dean and Cas. I mean, the camera does pan and focus on Cas after all.)

Dean and Future!Dean face off in the privacy of the meeting cabin. Future!Dean reveals that Yeager was infected with the Croatoan virus and he’d just performed a mercy killing. In fact, Future!Dean contends, his men were probably more freaked out by the Dean double than by Yeager’s death.

Dean apologizes for interfering in his leadership of the camp and they share a drink while Future!Dean reveals details about the mission they’d just been on. He pulls out the Colt from his duffel bag. After five years of searching, he’s finally ready to kill the Devil.

In the planning cabin the head honchos (Future!Dean, Risa, and Castiel) confer about the attack plan. They’re going to bust into Lucifer’s compound and kill him. Risa is particularly snippy and Future!Dean asks if everything’s okay. Dean helpfully says, “We were in Jane's cabin last night. And, apparently, we and...Risa have a connection.”

Yeah.

Future!Dean pushes the attack plan because he knows the whereabouts of Lucifer. He tortured it out of a demon just last week.

Classic Dialogue Alert

Cas: Our fearless leader, I'm afraid, is all too well schooled in the art of getting to the truth.

Dean: Torture? Oh, so, we're torturing again. No, that's good. Classy.

Cas: [laughs]

Future!Dean: [bitchface]

Cas: What? I like past you.

Oh, you guys. This. Scene. People have written hundreds of thousands of words about Castiel’s familiar sass, and Future!Dean’s harsh despair. Fans have wallowed in the agony of Dean’s fall into darkness and Castiel following him - always following him. Cas may be bitter and damaged but he’s still loyally fighting, regardless. Excuse me. I need to go lie down.

Risa and Castiel head off to assemble the assault team while Dean stays behind with Future!Dean. Dean wants to know why he’s going on the offensive with the team. What if he’s killed? Won’t that kill future him too? Future!Dean believes Zachariah is going to protect him and, under pressure, tells Dean about Sam.

“Sam? I thought he was dead,” Dean says.

“Sam didn’t die in Detroit. He said yes.” Future!Dean drops the truth bomb with a snarl. “You need to see it. The whole damn thing so you can do it different.” And Future!Dean’s proposal? Say “yes” to Michael as soon as Dean gets home. He didn’t say yes to Michael, confident that he’d find a better way. But once the world started going to shit and he tried to say yes he discovered that the angels had retreated back to Heaven and humanity was on their own. He begs Dean to learn from his mistakes and say yes. “But you won’t,” he concludes in despair. “‘Cause I didn’t.”

(“There is no free will,” I weep from my pool of tears on the floor.)

Cut to Dean heading toward the trucks alongside Chuck. Chuck advises Dean to hoard toilet paper like it’s gold. This is always the part of The End I have trouble with now because with Season 11 canon layered on top of it, we have God just hanging out at Camp Chitaqua. He might as well be propped up on a chair eating out of a bag of popcorn and watching the fireworks at the end of the world. It always makes me hate Chuck a little bit, whereas before the God revelation he was considerably more sympathetic to me. I suppose I rewatch and mourn the loss of that neurotic, mostly innocent pulp writer. I do like to think that Chuck’s presence might be what kept Camp Chitaqua a safe haven for so many years. They assumed they were lucky but Chuck was doing a little under-the-table god magic in order to live a more comfortable life. (Natasha: Kicks Chuck in the shins anyway.)

Dean drives with Cas to Lucifer’s compound. Cas pops amphetamines and offers some to Dean. “It's the perfect antidote to that absinthe,” he says.

Uh...Dean would really like to know why Cas is suddenly a drug-saturated hippy. Cas tells him that he went mortal. When the angels left Earth and sealed themselves into Heaven his mojo just drained away.

Cas: I'm practically human. I mean, Dean, I'm all but useless. Last year, broke my foot, laid up for two months.

Dean: So, you're human. Well, welcome to the club.

Cas: Thanks. Except I used to belong to a much better club. And now I'm powerless. I'm hapless, I'm hopeless. I mean, why the hell not bury myself in women and decadence, right? It's the end, baby. That's what decadence is for. Why not bang a few gongs before the lights go out? But then that's just how I roll.

BRB. Just going to be curled up here on the floor for a while, processing and mentally wrapping Cas in a blanket.

Future!Dean lays out the plan. They’re going to storm the facility and shoot the Devil. So...it’s pretty straightforward.

For science

Dean pulls Future!Dean aside and calls him out on the plan beneath the plan. It turns out that most of the team are heading through the front door to kill demons in a big ambush but Dean and Future!Dean are going to sneak around the back to get the jump on Lucifer. Dean’s horrified at this. Is Future!Dean really going to sacrifice his friends so callously? And CAS? Yes, yes he is. Future!Dean bops Dean unconscious before he can tell everyone they’re signed up to be sacrificial lambs.

Dean wakes to the stutter of distant gunfire in the compound. He runs up and sees muzzle  flashes in the windows. Dean rounds a corner and finds his future self in a rose garden. Future!Dean lies on the ground, the Colt just out of reach, and Lucifer’s foot on his neck. As Dean watches, Lucifer (in Sam’s body) snaps Future!Dean’s neck.

Dean’s defiant.

Dean: Go ahead. Kill me.

Lucifer: Kill you? Don't you think that would be a little...redundant?

Samifer apologizes for skeeving out Dean by speaking to him in Sam’s shape. Dean gives Samifer his best bitchface.

Lucifer seems to take offense at Dean’s low opinion of his devilish plan. He’s got a mission, after all.

Lucifer: You know why God cast me down? Because I loved him. More than anything. And then God created you. The little hairless apes.

Dean: You’re the same brand of cockroach I've been squashing my whole life. An ugly, evil, belly-to-the-ground, supernatural piece of crap. The only difference between them and you is the size of your ego.

Dean tells Samifer that he’d better kill him now, in the future, because if he ever gets back to his own time then he’ll find a way to kill him.

Lucifer is unbothered by Dean’s vow to kill him. “Whatever you do, you will always end up here. Whatever choices you make, whatever details you alter, we will always end up—here.” Dean doesn’t want to believe it but a single man tear is still threatening to slip down his face.

Zachariah zaps Dean back to the past just in time. He corners Dean in his motel room and strongly encourages him to say yes to Michael. When Dean still hesitates, he threatens grave injury to Dean once again.

Dean still says no because he is our precious, sweet, strong bean. He learned a lesson from Zachariah’s little future peek...just not the lesson Zach wanted to impart.

Just when Zachariah is closing in, Cas zaps Dean to meet him by the side of the road. They had an appointment, after all.

Under the shelter of Castiel’s gaze, Dean calls Sam and invites him to meet. At their meeting behind some secluded railroad tracks, Dean offers Sam the demon blade and a spot in the Impala once again. He apologizes and admits that he was wrong to push Sam away. “Maybe we are each other's Achilles heel. Maybe they'll find a way to use us against each other, I don't know. I just know we're all we've got. More than that. We keep each other human.”

Sam thanks him and the brothers vow to deny the dark future Zachariah projected and make their own future.

Natasha: Lifts head from floor and wipes tears from face. “Good episode, guys. Good episode.”

The Quotes

You know, it's kind of funny. Talking to a messenger of God on a cellphone. It's, you know, like watching a Hell's Angel ride a moped.

I thought I smelled your stink on this Back to the Future crap.

Rhonda Hurley. We were, uh, nineteen. She made us try on her panties. They were pink. And satiny. And you know what? We kind of liked it.

I got a camp full of twitchy trauma survivors out there with an apocalypse hanging over their head. The last thing they need to see is a version of The Parent Trap.

Why not go get washed up for the orgy?

I thought you'd gotten over trying to label me.

Not gonna lie to you. Me and him? Pretty messed up situation we got going.

You ever get back there, you hoard toilet paper. You understand me? Hoard it. Hoard it like it's made of gold. 'Cause it is.

Okay, if you don't like, uh, 'reckless', I could use 'insouciant', maybe.

[animegirl266]

Just Say Yes|| Jack Avery|| Why Don’t We Imagine|| Part 3

Sunlight screams at your eyes as your little sister, Marina pulls open the blinds in your bedroom. You groan, pulling the blankets over your head as she says, “Rise and shine! You can’t stay in bed forever. Stop sulking already!” 

“Get out, Mare!” You scream at her, the frustration clear in your voice.

“Not until you get up.” You can’t see her, but you know she just crossed her arms over her chest. 

“Get out!” You scream again, sitting up and throwing your pillow at her. She shrieks, running out of the room, slamming the door behind her. You fall on to your bed, closing your eyes. As much as you know she’s right, you can’t even imagine getting out of bed right now.

It’s been six months since you started dating Jack. You planned to visit him during your Christmas break, but being in college now, you realized that your break is only a three day weekend. Even so, you thought you could spend those three days in LA, but with money tight at your house, your mom said they couldn’t afford you a ticket. And you couldn’t drive there either, considering you still don’t have a car. You’d been looking forward to seeing Jack and all the boys for months now, thinking the whole time that you’d be able to spend Christmas with them. With reality crashing down on you all at once you slumped into severe disappointment, hence your sulking that Marina and your mom have been pestering you about for the last week.

Your phone beeps, notifying you of a reminder. Grabbing it from your bedside table, you look at your lock screen.The reminder reads: December 23rd. Get packing! Leaving for LA tomorrow! 

You had made your calendar last month and had forgotten to delete the notification. “Uuuugh!” You moan, dropping your phone on your bed. After a few moments of blissful silence, your iPhone starting ringing. What now? 

You pick up your phone, looking at it reluctantly. You read Babe on the top of your screen. Jack was Facetiming you. You press accept, and are greeted by Jack’s handsome face. 

“Hey, gorgeous.” He smirks at you, making you giggle. 

“Hi, baby.” Worry flashes across his face as he takes a better look at you, noticing the bags under your eyes, and the sadness written on your features.

“What’s wrong?” His voice is soft and tender, yet raspy with the early hours of the morning.

“Nothing. I’m just bummed that I won’t be able to visit you guys like I planned.” You shrug, trying your best to not make him worry like he always does. 

“What do you mean you won’t be able to visit us?”

“Jack, I told you like, three days ago. Were you not listening?” You furrow your brows, frustration replacing your sadness. 

“No, no. I was. Did you check your mail today?” He slumps back against his couch and you can just imagine him crossing his legs, resting his ankle on his other knee. 

“What? No. Are you trying to distract me?” Jack laughs at your accusation, a beautiful smile playing on his lips. 

“Just go look.” You raises an eyebrow at your boyfriend, but do as you’re told. You leave your phone on your bed, telling Jack you’ll be right back. A couple minutes later you return to your room holding an anonymous letter addressed to you. You wave it in front of the camera, getting Jack’s attention. 

“What’s this?” You ask, pursing your lips as you sit on your bed. 

“Hmm... don’t know. Maybe you should open it and see.” He suggests with a wink. You laugh and start ripping open the envelope. Jack’s eyes never leave your face which makes you blush and giggle as you continue to open the envelope with your fingers. You dump the contents on to your bed and gasp. A single plane tickets sits on your sheets. “See you tomorrow, beautiful.” With that, Jack hangs up and you’re left there, staring at the plane ticket in awe.

You step out of the plane and into your gate, looking around for the boys. Jack texted you before you took off, telling you the all five of them would be waiting for you when you landed. After literally five seconds of looking you found them... or more, they found you. “Y/N!” You hear the lanky boy you call your best friend scream. You get a sense of deja vu as you charge into his arms. You hold on to Daniel for what must of been a whole five minute. Someone taps your shoulder and clears their throat. You turn around, retreating out of Daniel’s grasp.

“Just saying, usually the boyfriend gets the first hug.” Jack says, running a hand through his curls. You laugh and throw yourself into your boyfriend’s arms. You stand on your tip toes to nuzzle your face into the crook of his neck and he rests his chin on the top of your head. Pulling away, you place a kiss on his lips and turn your attention to the other boys.

On the drive to the boys’ house, you sit next to Zach. “You ready for a Why Don’t We style Christmas, Y/N?” He asks, making sure to get you in frame for his Instagram story.

“Lay it on me!” You smile at the camera with a wink.

The Why Don’t We house is in full season. Christmas lights hang from the roof, there are reindeer in the yard, and Corbyn has a stash of candy canes in his coat pocket. Entering the house, you get a full blast of holiday spirit. There are pine wreaths hung on the walls, peppermint and pine scented candles adorn every surface, and a breath-taking Christmas tree sits in the living room. Beautiful ornaments, strings of lights and popcorn, and a glowing, golden star decorate the tree. It’s so easy for you to imagine all five of the boys and their friends huddled around this tree, laughing as they decorated. 

The boys’ laughing brings you back to reality and you realize how long you had been staring at the tree. A blush blossoms across your face as you look down at your feet, placing a stray hair behind your ear. “You’re so cute.” Jack says, kissing the top of your head on his way to the kitchen. 

That night, all eight of you (eight being, you, the boys, David, and Aspen) sit around the Christmas tree in the living room, eating dinner. You sit there for hours, laughing and sharing stories. You don’t know when, but some how you end up in Jack’s lap, snuggling in front of everyone. At midnight, you wait a second before bursting out, mid-conversation, “Merry Christmas!” You and Zach say it simultaneously, making everyone laugh. 

Your Christmas was magical. All day, the boys made you feel like a princess, doing little things like opening doors for you, or pulling out your chair. But at the same time, you felt like one of them, engaging in idle banter with Jonah and poking fun at Corbyn with Zach.

When it was time to exchange presents you were jumping in your shoes, excited to see the boys’ reactions. You had bought them each a gift or two, hoping they were the perfect ratio of thoughtful and casual. You gave each of them their bags, watching as their faces went from shocked to happy. You had spent a considerably large amount of money on their presents, without your mother’s knowledge, of course. You watched Jack shrug on the Adidas jacket you had gotten him, the color contrasting from his skin perfectly. “You look great, babe.” You smile at him as he turns to you. “Do you like it?” You ask hesitantly. 

Jack presses a kiss to your lips, resting his forehead against yours. “I love it. Thank you.” 

Later that night, after your shower, you sit beside Jack on his bed. He leans over, kissing your forehead before pulling back. “Here, Y/N. Merry Christmas.” Jack places a small box in the palm of your hand. You smile at him before opening it. You stare down at what the tiny box holds inside, an infinity necklace with studded Amethyst crystals, your birthstone. You place your hand over your mouth, something you find you do a lot when you’re with Jack. “I love it.” Jack takes the necklace and puts it on you. You beam at Jack’s present, holding the necklace in your hand.

You look up at your boyfriend seeing unease on his face. Placing your hand on his, you ask, “You okay?”He tilts his head slightly so he’s at your eye level.

“I uh... I have something to tell you.” You get worried for a moment, but reassure yourself that Jack would never do anything to hurt you. You nod, urging him to continue. “The boys and I are gonna go on tour again in a couple months to promote the new album, and I won’t be able to see or talk to you a lot when we leave.” Your face falls, and you stare down at your lap. You text Jack every single day. To think that he’ll be out of reach for weeks... months. It’s too much for you to comprehend. 

“So... I was thinking,” He continues, catching you off guard. “Will you come on tour with us?” Your breath catches in your lungs. Your head snaps up, and you look Jack in the eyes.

“Ar... Are you serious?” Your voice is airy as you laugh. The thought of coming with the boys on tour didn’t crossed your mind. You never dreamed of going around America, considering the low income your family has dealt with your whole life. 

“Of course I’m serious. I don’t get to see enough of you. Spending two and a half months with you on the road sounds too good to turn down in my head... Say yes, Y/N.” You love this about Jack -  the way he pushes you to do new things. The way his eyes light up at the sign of adventure. Jack says that a lot to you - just say yes, and you can never turn him down. 

“I’d love to come.” You smile at your boyfriend, suddenly thrilled. You jump into his lap, giving him the biggest hug possible. You kiss him, pecking at his lips. He holds the back of your head, bringing you in for a longer, more meaningful kiss. “I’ve never been more excited for anything in my life.”

[thezacharywinters]

Date at the Beach [Zach & Hope]

@hope-robinson

[Zach]

Zach didn’t know what to expect as Hope brought him to the beach. Soon enough he felt the sand around them as he still had his eyes closed.

[Hope]

Hope led him to the beach before arriving and moving to show him what she had done. She was a little nervous as she told him he could open his eyes.

[Zach]

Zach opened his eyes and saw the arrangement in front of him and he couldn’t help but to smile. “It looks perfect.” He looks over and kisses her. “How about you explain a little bit about to it to me yeah? What was going through your mind when you did this?” He asks curiously as everything looked so intricately done and it must have taken a long time.

[Hope]

“Well I just wanted to do something special for you. I’m not used to all this so maybe I went a bit overboard but I don’t know you make me feel really special and I thought it would only be right to make you feel the same. I mean...yeah...and I don’t know I just thought it was cute and when I’m around you I feel...girly. I feel like a princess so I guess I just let that feeling out with all of this.” She explained as her cheeks turned red.

[Zach]

Zach could only smile as he heard her words and saw her cheeks turning red. “You should never have to be embarrassed about how you feel around me. It is my obligation to make you feel like a princess you know.” He teases her before kissing her cheeks. “Thank you, I love it.”

[Hope]

Hope smiled as she nodded. “Well my work is done then. Shall we eat?” She asked sitting down on one of the pillows. “And no I didn’t make any of this, I still don’t know how to cook and I didn’t want you to get sick.”

[Zach]

Zach took a seat on one of the pillows next to her as he let out a small laugh. “Mhm well I mean your mom could teach you how to make some stuff, it would be a good bonding experience for both of you. But you could have told me you made it or helped and I would be just as impressed.” He winked.

[Hope]

“That would have been a lie and you would have expected me to do it again and been let down. I don’t want to do that.” She replied. “And my mom never gets to cook anyway this lets her get out all that energy she saves up.”

[Zach]

“Well I mean you could have said it in a playful way….never mind. Mhm all the more reason you should go and learn with her too.” He teases before giving her a kiss.

[Hope]

She kissed him back and smiled, “You are very lovely today. Well besides earlier, did I do something to deserve all this?” She asked teasingly.

[Zach]

“Deserve all what? Mhm?” He teases before kissing her again. “I think you were you and that is definitely someone who deserves this.”

[Hope]

Hope laughed as she kissed him again. “You are so cheesy. But I love you regardless.” She said kissing his nose. “You know you should keep complimenting me though I like it.” She teased.

[Zach]

“Mhm I could complement you forever did you know that?” He asks with a smirk before turning his attention the food. “So tell me, what are the lovely dishes we have before us?”

[Hope]

“Don’t tell me that or I’ll make you do it.” She winked before showing the food. “We have lobster, alfredo pasta, and whipped cream and strawberries for dessert.”

[Zach]

“Lobster, that sounds fancy and ooo, alfredo pasta is one of my favorites.” He smiles. “You might have brought strawberries for dessert but I might just put that whipped cream somewhere else as well.”

[Hope]

She smirked at his words, “My same exact thoughts.” She replied as she made his plate before making her own. “You know I was thinking we should start planning our wedding.”

[Zach]

Zach thanked Hope as she gave him his plate of food. “That is true we should start planning it. When would you like it to be?” He asks before taking a bite out of the food.

[Hope]

“Hm I was thinking a fall wedding or maybe winter? Before Christmas? I think that would be cute.” She answered taking a bite out of the lobster.

[Zach]

“I am fine with whatever you want baby girl.” He responds with a smile before eating some of the Alfredo.

[Hope]

“Well I want you to be happy with it too, there are so many things that we have to do because I’m a royal so I want you to be happy. It is our wedding you know.” She said.

[Zach]

“You know that whatever makes you happy makes me happy too. Besides wedding days are mostly about the bride at least from where I came from it was. I don't have to go through training for that do I?”

[Hope]

Hope shook her head as she finished eating. “No you don’t. Ah I was thinking of making my sisters the flower girls? And my younger brothers the ring bearers? I don’t have any best friends on the island so I don’t know who I could get for my maid of honor….I could ask Ken...I mean he’s the closest thing to a friend I have.” She trailed off thinking.

[Zach]

“That would be cute yeah we can do that. You don't hang out with Jay or anything? I mean she works for your father too. Last I heard, your parents want to set them up together so maybe you two should get to know each other.” He offers up.

[Hope]

“We’ve never hung out which is so weird? I think we would have really liked each other, we both have the same type of personalities but for whatever reason we’ve never met.” She shrugged wondering why that is. “But you seem interested in Jay are you two friends Zach?” She asked looking at him.

[Zach]

“Yeah we work together. I am in charge of the sirens and she is in charge of the shifters. Maybe I could introduce you two then. You are both very similar...You do both love to party a lot.”

[Hope]

“I thought Mark was in charge of all that?” She asked. “Yeah maybe. I haven’t been partying in a while so I’ll think about it.”

[Zach]

“Mark is on maternity leave remember?” He responds before looking at the other and then nodding his head. “I am sure you two will run into each other eventually. I am surprised you haven't so far.”

[Hope]

“Oh right. I totally forgot, I’m so used to him being here.” She nods at his words. “Yeah I’m sure we will and maybe I’ll have my first friend on the island.” She teased. “Shall we have dessert now?”

[Zach]

The male had finished his food as he listened to her words. “Mhm you should make more friends besides if anyone tries to mess with you, I know you would be in good hands.” He explains before smiling. “I think that's a good idea.”

[Hope]

“I’ve tried to make friends. People don’t like me. Either they think I will have sex with them or give them something because I’m royal. Or they hate me because I’m a hybrid. Finding friends that like me for me is hard.” She responds getting out the strawberries.

[Zach]

“Mhm you should definitely talk to Jay. I think she can help you with that.” He responds while taking some of the whipped cream and putting it on one of the strawberries.

[Hope]

“Help with what? People not liking me? Didn’t know it was something I needed help on.” She said putting the other food away as she rolled her eyes.

[Zach]

“No I mean being able to understand you. She used to get bullied a lot too. Her father cheated on her mother with another guy. It's something unheard of in the shifter world. And since her mother was dating a human, that made it worse. I want you to be able to have a best friend other than me of course.” Zach teases before getting some whipped cream on her face. “Oops.”

[Hope]

“Ah that’s horrible. I’m sure it wasn’t easy growing up around shifters who are obsessed with imprints and how loyal they are.” She commented before laughing as Zach put whipped cream on her face. “It’s okay.” She shrugged it off before grabbing the bottle and spraying it all over his face. “Now I really didn’t mean to do that.”

[Zach]

“You can always talk to her about that I am sure she wouldn't mind.” Zach put his hand up but was too late as the whipped cream landed on his face. “So it magically slipped right right....” He kisses her so the cream got on her face too. “Oh sorry, I forgot I had that on my face.” The male smirked.

[Hope]

She tried to push him away before he could kiss her but was too late. “Oh yeah you totally forgot.” She nodded before grabbing a strawberry and smashing into his shirt. “Oops.”

[Zach]

“What did the poor strawberry do to deserve such a fate?” He asks with a shake of his head. He put some whipped cream on the strawberry before offering for her to have some.

[Hope]

She laughed softly before taking a bite of the strawberry in his hand. She moaned at the taste before pulling away. “Delicious.” She winked.

[Zach]

He bit his lip as he heard her moan at the taste. “You like it I take it.” He purrs before grabbing one for himself.

[Hope]

“I do, it needed more whipped cream though.” She smirks moving to slowly lick the whipped cream off his lips. “Much better.” She purred.

[Zach]

“You know what tastes better than just whipped cream? Me.” He bit his bottom lip as he looked at her.

[Hope]

“Is that so?” She asked looking at him. “Well maybe I should get a taste of you instead.” She purred as her eyes turned dark red.

[Zach]

“Who I am to deny what my princess wants hm?” Zach purrs while noticing her eyes turning dark red.

[Hope]

Hope leaned in as she looked at his lips before pulling away. “Hmm I don’t know that would be rewarding you and you did try to leave me so I will just stick with the strawberries.”

[Zach]

“Really is that so? What is that over there?” Zach asked while pointing off into the woods and waited for Hope to look before moving the strawberries out of sight “Oh no, there are no more strawberries left. I must have eaten all of them. Darn.”

[Hope]

She looked over to see what Zach was pointing at before shaking her head, “I don’t see anything.” She said looking back at him. “Oh that’s too bad. I guess we should get going then. I didn’t bring anything else for dessert with me.” She replied standing up.

[Zach]

“Or I could just eat you instead.” He smirked before kissing her and pinning her to the ground. “You are sweet enough for dessert so I think that works out perfectly.”

[Hope]

Hope laughed as she felt herself being pinned to the ground. “You should be very thankful you are so irresistible.” She teased before pulling him down to kiss him.

[Zach]

“Oh of course I am thankful for that.” He teases while kissing her as he let his hands trail down her body as he grinds against her.

[Hope]

She moaned softly as she deepened the kiss and bucked her hips into his. Her hands moved across his abs before she pulled his shirt off.

[Zach]

Zach helped her remove his shirt before he did the same with hers. He took his time as he kissed down her body before removing the rest of her clothes. His fingers teasing over her entrance as he could feel how aroused she already was. Slipping his fingers inside, he moaned at the sensation. “Fuck you are so wet already baby girl.”

[Hope]

Hope couldn’t stop herself from moaning loudly as she clenched around his finger. “Please stop teasing me Zach.” She moaned looking at him.

[Zach]

Zach withdrew his fingers from inside of her before undoing his own pants and stroking himself. He teases her entrance with the tip of his cock before sliding into her, moaning at the feeling.

[Hope]

Her hands tugged at the blanket under her as he thrusted inside of her. “Fuck you are so big.” She purred.

[Zach]

The male increases the speed at which he was thrusting into her. “Fuck you are so tight.” He moaned before kissing her deeply as he brought his hand down to rub circles against her clit.

[Hope]

Hope kissed him back and the more heated the kiss got it seemed the faster Zach went. Her hands moved to his hair to tug on it as her moans against his lips got louder.

[Zach]

Zach could feel himself drawing closer to the edge as he let marks against her neck and shoulders making sure everyone would see them. “Come on baby girl, tell daddy how much you love his cock in your tight little pussy.”

[Hope]

She moved her neck to give him more room to mark up her skin before she heard his words. Hope always found Zach incredibly sexy when he talked dirty to her and now was not an exception as she tugged harshly on his hair. “Fuck you know I love it. I love feeling every inch of you inside of me. You are the only one that makes me feel this way.”

[Zach]

“You know that I am the only one that can please that tight pussy of yours. No one else can make you cum so hard you see stars.” He growls while thrusting harder and deeper into her. “Cum for me baby girl. Cum for daddy.” His fingers rub aggressively against her clit as he wanted her to climax for him.

[Hope]

She didn’t bother holding back her screams of the others name as she clenched around him and came. Her body shook in complete pleasure as he was still rubbing her clit. “Fuck please cum for me. Fill me up with all your cum daddy. Please I want it so badly.” She begged bucking her hips.

[Zach]

Zach didn’t hold himself back as he came deep inside of her with a moan of her name. He rode out his orgasm after helping her through hers. “Fuck that was amazing. I love you so much.” He purrs before kissing her.

[Hope]

“I love you too Zach.” She replies kissing him back passionately. She pulled away after a bit and pushed a few strands of hair out of his face. “You are so beautiful.”

[Zach]

Shaking his head, he lets out a small laugh, “I do believe that is your job princess. You are the beautiful one here.” He teases.

[Hope]

She shook her head. “Nope that’s all you. I am nothing compared to you.” She said kissing him softly. “You make me so happy.”

[Zach]

“You come from a line of royals princess. If anything my pirate self is nothing compared to you.” He teases before kissing her once more. “You make me happy too.”

[Hope]

“Where you come from doesn’t matter. It’s your heart that people tend to find more interesting.” She smiled before looking around them. “But being a princess we probably should have done this somewhere else, my parents would kill us for giving people a show.” She laughed.

[Zach]

“I am sure that your parents have done the same thing at some point. But alas, I guess we just have to resume this at the castle then now don’t we?” He teases before grabbing some of the clothes to help cover them up as he pulled out of her. “At least we can clean off in the water.” Zach teases before running into the water and splashing some on Hope.

[Hope]

“I do not want to think about my parents having sex in front of people that is just weird.” She laughed before watching him run into the water. “How old are you again?” She teased him before following him in the water and splashing him back.

[Zach]

“You said that when we get married that is what we have to do right?” He asks before she started to splash him back. “Hey I simply gave you some motivation to come rinse off. We can’t return to the castle all wet you know.” He jokes.

[Hope]

“Yes but there is a difference between obligation and being into public sex. I don’t want to think about my parents kinks Zach.” She replied splashing him again. “Well I mean, I think I’m usually always wet around you.” She laughed at her own joke.

[Zach]

“Oh that is very true...well I guess it won’t matter if you go back wet then.” He smirked before tackling her into the water before running on shore before she could get to him. “Oops!” He yells before getting a head start.

[Hope]

Hope came back up for air watching him run away and she actually felt sort of bad for him but not enough to stop her from shifting and running after him and winding up in front of him.

[Zach]

He was running as fast as he could but alas he was no match for Hope. “Oh come on no shifting that is cheating!” Zach exclaims while taking note that if she were to shake it would get him all wet. “Nice puppy….” He responds before putting the towel over him so he wouldn’t get to wet if she decided to shake.

[Hope]

Hope shifted back and crossed her arms over her chest. “Then don’t dunk me under water that is just wrong. If I wasn’t a siren that could have ended badly.” She teased. “Did you only bring one towel? I mean I will happily walk to the castle naked but I’m sure you won’t like that very much.” She smirked.

[Zach]

“No, the other one is over there still. I figure we could just dry off then put our clothes on before heading to the castle.” He explains before drying off and going over and starting to put on his clothes.

[Hope]

She nods going back to dry herself off and then getting dressed.

[Zach]

Once they were both dressed, Zach took her hand, “Alright time to head to the castle. I am sure Emmett misses his parents.” He teases before kissing her forehead. “Thank you for the date, I really loved it by the way.”

[Hope]

Hope squeezed his hand as she dismissed his thank you. “Don’t mention it.” She replied walking with him to the castle.