#i just drop bitches if they're bad units ok.

[saviourkingslut]

9 for the ask meme? :o

9. Most disliked character(s)? Why?

im reserving 'most hated' for another ask i got (heehee) so these are like, characters i don't hate but that for one reason or another rank p low on my list. also im limiting to playable characters, but i can't say anything abt the dlc characters cause i haven't played the dlc yet :')

- (pre-timeskip) bernie. yeah people are gonna kill me for this one but i genuinely cannot stand her supports. i do not find the screaming endearing. also she talks in third person and i had a really gross geography teacher in secondary school who also did that lmfao. she's mostly cool after timeskip tho, also her support with felix is really cute.

- lorenz. idk i just. find him p boring. lol. also unit-wise i don't really like his stat growths, esp not if you put him on a horse. vastly prefer sylvain and ferdinand in every way

- linhardt. actually i do kind of like him, i think he's p funny cause he's such a bitch, i just dislike him cause he's like. the worst unit in the game if we're talking stats/abilites etc. dorothea also has that problem where she's a nice character but mediocre as a unit.

- hubert. this hoe got me like. he could've had a lot of potential as a character. but instead he eats edelgard's ass 24/7 and other than that he doesn't do much else until he dies, unless you play cf lol. he doesn't get a personal arc or anything, he's just there and he acts creepy. his cuter supports do not make up for it, unfortunately. he's a p good unit and his voice acting is funny tho ill give him that

[sirro85-blog]

Dark Horses 5

Kovac hoved into view, his face caked in congealed with blood, his eyes bright through the grime, his mouth split into a grin.

"Do you feel the joy of it? The everliving fucking joy," his voice was animated and loud, "I tell you now, you'll never feel as alive as you do right now!"

Kovac looked around, his movements feral, "I love this job," another mad grin, "you'll never feel alive again!"

Costa jerked awake and looked around, he was slumped in a chair, around him soldiers worked. Staff Sergeant Frank King was binding Butlanska's wounds.

"You doing ok trooper?" Asked a voice.

Costa looked up feeling dazed, "uh, yes ma'am," he responded.

"Very good trooper, come with me," said the Quartermaster.

Something sparked in Costa's numb brain, "you called me trooper, ma'am."

"I did, would you rather I change?" Came the response.

"No, no trooper is good, ma'am" Costa said stumbling after the large woman, he'd never enjoyed being called "Cherub"

Ten minutes later Costa was sat at a table tucking into a plate of food, he had clean clothes and had enjoyed a brief shower, now the Quartermaster had produced cottage pie and vimto seemingly by magic and he was filling up on his favourite meal. The Quartemaster stood nearby, he could tell she wasn't watching him.

Captain Dorman and Sergeant Webb approached, they both stopped a distance off as the Qm's baleful glare turned to them, "evening Qm, I wanted a chat with Trooper Costa, debrief him after his escapades with the Major."

"Later."

"I was rather, er hoping, he's in our command...welfare," the Captain trailed off.

"I've got him right now, Major told me, you can talk later Hero, take Plank and get about your day," spoke the Qm.

Costa, feeling more alert and less dazed appreciated the peace, he respected his Troop commander and his sergeant but this period of calm made him feel whole again, he watched the two men walk away. He felt even better when Ty was brought across to sit with him.

"Here you go Mouth," said the Qm handing a bottle of iced tea to Ty, it was his favourite brand.

His meal finished Costa felt renewed, The Qm gave him a nod and walked away. A minute or so later Major Kovac appeared and patted Ty on his uninjured arm.

"Damn good to see you in one piece trooper," Costa here went through the ringer keeping you alive, would've been a damn shame to waste that effort," he turned to Costa, "Costa, tell Sergeant Webb I said you can carry that kukri anywhere you want." The Major nodded to them both and walked off. Ty placed his hand over Costa's and they sat in silence for a while.

"Cherub, Mouth stop lazing about holding hands and piss off back to work the pair of you," yelled the Qm and the two troopers ran for it.

The Dark Horses fortified their positions and scouts were sent out to check the secondary Bartuq positions.

Barbie stopped running and lay down on the floor, "It's too much, it's too damn wet, this isn't air this is soup!"

Becca turned back and jogged over to her, "struggling Baps?"

"Fuck your skinny ass Becca, this is too damn hot. Its a jungle, its like 1000% humidity," gasped Panther dropping to her knees beside the prone Barbie.

"Come on, it's not so bad, we round this headland and comeback down by the river, one of the rivers, we'll make it about 12k back to base." Becca said jogging round her two friends.

Knickers slowed to a stop and bent at the waist, gasping for breath, "If we, kill her here, we can, dump the body, in the river, and claim, she went on, ahead."

"Oh come on, it's not all that bad we're over 2/3 done. Only a little more suffering left," Becca encouraged.

"Listen bitch," Barbie said rolling onto her knees, "you think just because you like pain the rest of us want this?"

"I don't like pain?"

"Really!? Hurt-me-Daddy-Becca doesn't like pain? Choke-me-Daddy-Becca isn't enjoying being short of breath?" Scoffed Panther.

Becca stopped jogging on the spot, "I don't call Kovac Daddy."

"No? What do you call him? Master?" Panther hooted, "Major!!?"

"Oh Major, yes sir, I'll do anything you order Major, do you salute?"

Becca pouted and rounded on Panther, "what about you? Do you call Wolf sir while on your knees?"

Panther gave a peal of laugher, "fuck off, he calls me a goddess before we even start, he only outranks me out here, we all know Kovac is the big dog everywhere."

"Speaking of the big-dog, has the Major made a decision about this second position we need to capture?" Asked Barbie looking from her troop commander to her Sergeant.

"Nothing yet, but you can trust the Major will have a plan," answered Knickers.

Barbie nodded accepting this fact and gestured to the path, "shall we get this over with?" They started to jog down the track.

Kovac was sitting with Wolf in his office, "the plan has to be simple Wolf, there is no magic trick to this, we breech and we force them south onto the savannah and any survivors get mopped up by Towoli security forces at a later date, once the second defensive structure is captured they're finished as a power," Kovac spread his hands.

Wolf nodded, "look, overall it's a good plan but the idea of this being a rapid breech entry job, it's a bit...old fashioned."

"RBE is a classic because it works, long and short of it is, we need to get in and we need to do it fast, Dorman will breech, Becca will push in and you will sweep. I'll have Gilly set up the gunners to drive any escaping frogs south." Kovac stood, "once the Qm has the ordinance redistributed we'll give orders."

The Dark Horses were a unique force in the galaxy, taken wholesale from a regiment that had taken heavy losses they had all been trained to the same standard and even for human military were considered highly trained. I found during my time with these humans that I took their training for granted, these were not the human standard, these were the heights humanity could reach in this area. Twinned with this complacency was an amazement that humans could train, could learn a skill and develop it to a level of brilliance even to other humans. Most races known were born to their specific tasks in society.

Of course all species could develop or enhance a skill but none could break a typecast like humans could.

When the Dark Horses attacked the Bartuq defence, I realised I was watching military unit that had been working together and been led by the same officers for over a decade.

It looked like the fluid parts of a machine, 3 troop stole forwards in the gloom and placed their charges, they breached the outer perimeter and Becca led 2 troop forward, flooding the breach and securing a position. Fortified by Dorman's 3 Troop Becca pushed on and Wolf came behind to support them. Within the hour the Bartuq compound was captured.

I joined Becca and Kovac on the ridge watching the Bartuq stream out into the grasslands, their numbers greatly diminished.

"Tough bit of work that," Becca muttered.

"Butchers bill mercifully short," replied Kovac.

"Won't have to listen to Grey's guitar practice for a while," Becca said.

"Aye, hopefully Frank won't be able to save all his function in that arm."

This is a human habit, making cruel comments to alleviate a situation, they call it humour, or friendship.

Armoured vehicles poured out of a group of hills attacking the Bartuq.

"Oh fuck, what's this fart-waffle?" Asked Gilly as he joined the two officers.

Kovac cursed softly, "It's the Earth Defence Corps."

"What are the EDC doing? What are they doing here? Fucking cowboys," Becca asked.

"Forget that, that's, what? Three squadrons? Of bloody interceptor class Chimera armoured light cav, that means they must have deployed at batallion level, so they have at least a regiment of support infantry, two? They must have more armour and combat support arms to support that too...they've either deployed a goddamn Brigade of troops to this rock or they're even more incompetent than I give credit." Kovac said, his voice stunned.

"So the cannon fodder have come in strength, what else is new? If they didn't deploy a brigade to do a platoon's job they wouldn't be able to lose as many men as they like to do," Becca said shrugging.

"No, they've deployed a brigade of human troops on the border of Xhost held territory!" Kovac said, turning around and looking at the sky, "you can't do that quietly."

"Kov, does it matter? I mean..." Gilly was turning to Kovac but cut off as the Major turned and ran down the slope.

I've seen human panic and fear, I've also seen humans overcome that fear and direct it. This seemed to be what Kovac was doing

The Major was using his communicator, "all units return to the FOB, immediate withdrawal."

Gilly turned to Becca and gave a questioning gesture after Kovac, but Becca wasn't looking. She was staring at the sky.

Half a dozen Xhost warbirds were dropping in from low orbit, they dropped low over the EDC and began firing into the Chimera squadrons.

Becca had turned and streaked away, Gilly opened his communicator up and started calling instructions to Griffin Battery.

A dreadnought class Xhost ship broke atmospher and I looked up on time to see a cloudburst, a dark, stinking rain fell across the savannah and onto the foliage the Dark Horses were retreating into, I felt it hit my exterior and it burned, I slowed and as more drops hit I blacked out.

I could hear voices, human voices.

"You both look ridiculous," laughed a familiar voice.

"Good to see you weren't caught in it."

"Listen, the implication that I had found somewhere to take a nap is a vicious rumour spread by my political enemies," that voice again.

"So you avoided it and Kovac avoided it but the rest of us got soaked, including the professor," said a third voice.

"Did it have any effect on you lot?"

"Made my eyes stream," said the second voice, a woman's.

The first voice, must be Wolf I realised, "lot of red eyes."

"Stinks and makes you cry, hardly a dangerous weapon," the third vice said.

"Killed the Bartuq survivors and a few drops overwhelmed the professor," said Gilly.

"So...what is it?" Asked Becca.

"Kovac says it's propenyl sulfenic acid, according to Petra."

"Sulfenic...onion juice!?"

"Basically," Wolf said apologetically.

"Explains why I'm craving hotdogs," said Gilly.

"So, what? They've used their bio-weapons and it gave me cravings, the Xhost aren't as tough as I remember them," Wolf said.

"Except, they've landed and formed a beachhead. Kovac has contacted the general for support...till then we're on our own, the onion juice devastated the Towoli numbers."

It should come as no shock that some of the galaxy's most potent biochemical weapons have been harnessed by humans for food, drink and recreation. Nicotinoid, cannabinoid, capsaicin ethanol and goitrin and thyocyanates. All accepted toxins in the human diet.