#i just booked my hotel room and bought my ticket + the pass for the smallville nights event

[luthwhore]

is anyone else planning to go to creation con nashville in december? if any mutuals are going it would be fun to do a meet up there. 👀

[adore-laur]

Dadrry idea: since Harry left his position of head chef and there’s a second baby now, maybe they’re struggling a tiny bit with money. Not too much but things are a little stressful and they have to cancel a holiday maybe? Or one of the girls just doesn’t get a toy she wants or something? And they have to explain it to the child just while Harry picks up a few more shifts

——

Harry handled the finances and was highly aware of each transaction made in the family. With two kids, you both had to be quite frugal, especially since Harry was working fewer hours at the restaurant and you were a stay-at-home mom. While there was never an issue of not having enough money to pay the bills and provide your children with life’s necessities, the prospect of running out still haunted your mind. It was possible that an unforeseeable emergency could snatch a hefty chunk of money away. Additionally, there were other boring adult charges like mortgages, taxes, and monthly subscriptions that all left a bigger deduction with each year that passed.

Then there was the summer trip to Italy happening in two months. The plane tickets had already been bought and gifted for Christmas, and the villa was booked in advance. It was expensive, but the other option of staying in a cramped hotel room for a week was undesirable in all regards. The space and privacy were crucial for your sanity.

Italy was not a cheap travel destination per se. There would be money spent every day on transportation, dining, tourist traps, and whatever else sucked you in with its magnificent European beauty. Indulging in extravagance would be tempting, but if you planned and budgeted ahead of time, maybe the financial repercussions of the trip wouldn't be so deplorable. Your wishful thinking was blatantly deceptive.

After putting the kids to bed, you sat at the kitchen table under the dim chandelier and waited for Harry to finish unloading the dishwasher. His silent presence was comfortable as you pondered the logistics of the upcoming trip. Well, pondered was putting it lightly—you were brooding.

"I can hear you thinking," Harry said, setting the last bowl in the cupboard to his left. He washed and dried his hands, then walked over to you with his cotton pajama pants slung low on his hips. His bare torso was at your eye level, and you fought the urge to bury your face in the warm, chiseled skin there.

"My head is going to explode," you muttered, feeling an imminent migraine pulsing near your temples.

He fell into the chair beside you, exhausted from an eventful Saturday filled with dad duties, and scooted it closer to you. "Why, baby?" he asked, his palms scrubbing down his face as he yawned.

"I'm overthinking everything."

Placing his elbow on the table, he cradled his cheek in his palm and gave you his full focus. "Break it down for me."

"There's mainly one thing." You huffed, deciding to broach the topic before it got swept under the rug. "The Italy trip. Prices are going up, and I'm worried we won't be able to afford going anymore."

Harry's expression was the epitome of flummoxed. "Wait, what? Where is this coming from?"

"You're not working full-time," you explained, "and I'm not raking in any income. I mean, will we be able to financially recover from the trip? What if—"

"Hold on, hold on," he said softly, his eyes pinching shut. "Can I interrupt, please?"

You half-heartedly waved your hand in his general direction, in desperate need of his sensible guidance. "Be my guest."

"Let's backtrack for a second. Honey, why do you think we won't be able to afford it? The biggest costs are already out of the way."

"I just told you why. Think about it, Harry." You tapped the table to emphasize each point. "A meal for four people will probably cost over a hundred dollars. That includes breakfast, lunch, and dinner, so if we multiply that by the seven days we're there, it's going to be well over a thousand dollars."

"Okay," he said. He didn't seem to have anything to add after that, so you continued.

"Then there's transportation." You groaned, staring up at the ceiling. "We still have to decide if we're renting a car. If not, we'll have to pay for a bus, or a train, or a taxi. That's going to add up very quickly."

"Mm-hmm." Harry had a dopey look on his face, a hint of a smile tugging the corners of his lips up. Whatever. You were being realistic, and he was in a dreamland where money grew on trees.

You carried on, getting tangled in the vines of your brain's dense jungle. "And then what about all the sightseeing and activities? That's the most expensive aspect." You shrugged helplessly. "I was recently searching for free things to do in Tuscany. I guess there are a lot of buildings we can look at, but I don't know if the kids would enjoy it."

Harry nodded along. When he realized you were done with your long-winded explanation, he lifted his eyebrows and said, "It's a good thing we can spoil them with the raise I got yesterday."

"And also—what?" You stopped abruptly, catching your breath. Did he just...?

Harry stood and bent down to kiss your forehead in that sweet way of his—gentle and imploring, like he wanted to caress your brain and will it to calm down. "I got a raise yesterday," he repeated nonchalantly, nuzzling his nose into your hair.

"Why didn't you tell me?" you demanded, lightly smacking his shoulder.

"I'm telling you right now. I wanted to wait until we had a moment to ourselves." He crouched in front of you, holding your knees just like he'd done when you told him you were pregnant for the second time. The memory was so vivid that it almost left you stunned with emotion. "Five percent pay raise. We're going to be just fine." His simple smile was remedial. "We are not canceling this trip."

You exhaled, releasing all of your worries into the air, the pounding in your temples dissipating. "Why didn't you stop me from rambling on?"

"Because it's healthy to speak those types of thoughts aloud instead of letting them simmer," Harry replied like the perfect husband he was.

You cupped his cheeks and kissed him deeply, pouring all of your love and gratitude into it. "I'm so proud of you," you whispered against his mouth. He savored your words by humming and sliding his tongue across yours for a brief second. "I appreciate the hard work you put into making our little family happy. And thank you for making this vacation possible."

"Wanted to spoil my girls," Harry murmured, craning his neck to kiss you more. His wet lips pulled at yours, greedy for their pliancy.

"Are you going to pick up more hours at the restaurant?" you asked in between the sounds of lip-smacking and heavy breathing. Something about him at night, in the dimly lit kitchen, with you as his sole focus, was igniting that secret fuse only he could play with.

"Shhh..." His fingers dug into your waist as he lifted you off the chair. Your legs and arms wrapped around him, warmth flooding right under your skin like wildfire. "No more work talk. I want some alone time with my wife before a hungry baby wakes us up."

You giggled and bit his bottom lip in excitement before he carried you to the bedroom.

Miraculously, your six-month-old gave the both of you forty minutes of uninterrupted time to roll around in the sheets.

When you went to sleep later that night, visions of Tuscany's hillside vineyards and swimming in the vast sea erased your concerns. As did the unequivocal vision of the man beside you making precious memories with his babies.

With Harry, there was no need to sweat the small stuff. His eyes were set on the most important thing—family.

——

[skzhocomments]

Leaving what is broken - Jeongin / Seungmin Oneshot Fanfic

Pairing: Jeongin/Seungmin (of Stray Kids) x OC (name: Ari. The story is written in 2nd person, so there's lots of yous)

Genre: mature, angst, romance, fluff

Word Count: ~10k

Warnings: mature, explicit sexual content, cheating, swearing, feelings of hopelessness and uncertainty, angst, crying and others.

This is just a story that doesn’t describe Jeongin or Seungmin’s true characters in any way. It’s just a product of my imagination and should be treated as such.

This story is also on Wattpad: click here.

A/N: As any other writer out there, I would appreciate reblogs and your comments on this story. Please let me know if you enjoyed it, and most importantly, have fun!

~Reposting on this account because the other one never appears in the tags... must be cursed~

---

Summary:

Jeongin loves you. That is an absolute, undisputable and undoubtable fact. Everyone who knows you two, knows this as well. You've been each other's firsts in everything. First crush, first embrace, first kiss, first late-night fuck, but most importantly, first love. Neither of you believed in that silly saying about how the first love is certainly going to end badly, that it never works out, so you never believed that Jeongin will also be your first heartbreak.

© all rights reserved by skzho (Tumblr)/ storminsidemycore (Wattpad)

---

Leaving what is broken - Jeongin / Seungmin Oneshot Fanfic

Jeongin loves you.

That is an absolute, undisputable and undoubtable fact.

Everyone who knows you two, knows this as well.

You've been each other's firsts in everything. First crush, first embrace, first kiss, first late-night fuck, but most importantly, first love. Neither of you believed in that silly saying about how the first love is certainly going to end badly, that it never works out, so you never believed that Jeongin will also be your first heartbreak.

In fact, the thought never even passed through your head. You didn't even consider it a possibility.

So, you were totally unprepared.

You both met when you were children, and clicked instantly, no matter how much the kids at school made fun of you for holding hands in 6th grade. It was embarrassing, but you already knew you loved Jeongin, so you could stand through every trial the young adult life put you through.

The first and only problem in your relationship came when he was 16 and told you he wants to do something more with his life, to leave the small, quiet mountain town you both grew up in, and to pursue a career in the music industry. He was a talented singer, and you always complimented his voice when he sang you love ballads, and that gave him the courage he needed to audition.

You were happy, and you supported him unconditionally and encouraged him to do it. You knew he could, even when he wasn't sure of it himself. You just knew he had it in him, and that he was made for greater things that this small town could offer him.

You were there when he heard back from this big company in Seoul called JYP Entertainment, you held his hand booking train tickets together so that he can go through the final trial that ultimately got him in, and you were there, in the hotel room, waiting for his practice to end so that you can hug and congratulate him for proving you what you already knew: that he could do whatever he set his heart to.

You are still here today, 5 years later, in your shared apartment he bought for the two of you.

When he got accepted in the company, you didn't know how you were going to do it. Both of you were still in high school, but you decided to move with him to Seoul, where you didn't know anyone, to get a job to be able to support you living there as well since Jeongin was not getting paid much at first, and you two kept being together, no matter how successful he got.

He loves you. You know it. You are sure of it. It just doesn't feel like he loves you that much lately, though, since you are damned to spend yet another anniversary alone. Dinner already got cold on the table, his wine glass stayed untouched while you emptied and refilled yours for at least 5 times now, but what hurts the most is glancing at your phone, empty of any messages to at least acknowledge the fact that you've been together for exactly 12 years.

It hurts.

~

What Jeongin is doing right now in one of the bathroom stalls at work would make anyone question his love for you, but ever since he met you when you were 10, and even now, 12 years later, he's been in love with you, undoubtedly so. You're still the reason he gets up in the morning, his favourite person, and the one he wants to grow old with.

Why is he doing this?

Why is he letting this intern choke on his dick while he rolls his head back and moans in pleasure?

Why is he pushing her head down and caressing her face lovingly, encouraging her that she can, indeed, take it, even if her whole face is smeared with make-up and snot and she's clearly struggling?

Why is he loving the sounds she makes when she also moans in pleasure deep-throating him, the string of saliva uniting her tongue and his dick when she removes her face to take a few breaths, and the way she grips his hips to support herself on the ground?

It's hard to explain.

You were his first, and that was enough in the small mountain town. It was enough the first 3 years when his team was struggling with their debut and the many comebacks. You were there, you comforted him, and you stayed by his side no matter how hard he unloaded his disappointment, frustrations, or insecurities onto you. Whatever he would tell you, you always had the right words that would make him feel better and that would keep him going.

But something's changed in the past 2 years. His band was finally starting to become successful, people started to notice him, and he loved it. This was, after all, the sole reason why he wanted to get out of the town: to make a name for himself, to be seen by others.

With all this new-found attention, he found himself surrounded by many beautiful girls who would give their all to just get 5 minutes of his time, and he found himself become curious.

He was young and successful, he won't always be in his twenties, and who knows how long this attention was going to last?

He loved it. But he also loved you. There was an undeniable conflict inside his heart regarding you vs. all the girls he could have fun with, so he started to put boundaries. He never let himself get caught in situations where he would spend time one-on-one with someone he was attracted to, but his defences quickly failed seeing that his bandmates wouldn't follow the same rules and had fun anytime they wanted, and he got jealous.

He envied his friends for not having someone waiting for them at home, for being able to live the way they wanted to and have fun with anyone and anywhere, no strings attached.

He found himself wanting it as well more and more, and besides, you were always going to be there for him. You were the one he was going to grow white with, so a little fun he has with someone random you wouldn't even find out of would inevitably satisfy his primal urges and would not hurt anyone.

Plus, it's not like he's emotionally cheating on you. He loves you, that much he knows, and he found it out again and again each time he came home after having sex with a random bimbo. You were still the one he wanted to come back to, so he started building all sorts of thoughts and ideas in his head that would justify his unfaithfulness. He's never seen the same girl twice, and he never let anyone else find out of his rendezvous, because he wanted everyone to know and respect you as his one and only girl.

~

You wish you didn't know. Fuck, you truly wish. You wish you'd stayed oblivious, because now that you know, there's no way to take it back.

You were still waiting for him sat down at your failed anniversary dinner table in your empty apartment, with no text whatsoever letting you know that he's going to be late.

It's true that you didn't specifically mention anything about the anniversary, but you did make plans to meet up at 8 in your apartment, so where was he? You didn't expect him to forget.

He wasn't supposed to have anything else tonight. Sure, Stray Kids won a prize in the morning, and there was supposed to be an after party or something, but he promised you that he will come spend the evening with you, so where was he?

You didn't know.

So you called.

And called.

And called.

And only on the 4th call, almost one hour later, he picked up.

Only he didn't answer intentionally.

"Jeongin?" You asked, your voice hopeful. Maybe he wanted to celebrate with his teammates a bit, that's why he was running late.

You only heard small moans on the other side, but still, the thought of him cheating was impossible to you, so you assumed it was just bad signal.

"Baby? Can you hear me?" You asked again and listened closely to the other line.

"Oh God, just like that." You heard Jeongin's voice, and froze.

"Does that feel good?" The voice of a girl echoed through your ear, and you heard your boyfriend moan in pleasure.

You almost dropped your phone from the shaking of your hands.

"Jeongin...?" You asked again to no avail.

"Yes baby, you're so good at this." He praised whoever was there with him.

"You're so big, fuck, I've never had someone stretch me as good as you do."

"You're doing so well, love. Come on, move faster."

"Am I your girl?"

"Of course." He moaned. "Who else? And what a good girl you are..."

No.

This was not happening.

No way this is Jeongin.

You looked at the caller ID, and your heart fell out of your chest again when you saw that you didn't call someone else by mistake.

No.

"I wish you would cum in me, baby" The girl whined. "Can't we take off the condom?"

"No... I told you I can't do it, love..."

"But Innie, I want you to fill me..."

No.

No way.

You hastily closed the call and felt your breathing become ragged, a panic attack creeping in. The walls were getting closer, and you tried to stand up from the table, but managed to fall down somehow, your knees giving in, knocking your empty glass wine off the table onto the floor and breaking it in the process.

There were glass shards all over the floor, as you sobbed on your knees and bled from the few small cuts on your arms from the debris.

You didn't even feel them, for the pain in your heart was too powerful. Your stomach became a knot, and you felt yourself become dizzy, wanting nothing more than to throw up.

What is happening?

Why...?

Why is this happening to me...?

What are you supposed to do now?

You sobbed and sobbed and couldn't remember how you got the phone from the table in your hands, and dialled someone, one of your only friends ever since coming here, who happened to be one of Jeongin's bandmates.

"Ari, love, what's up?" Seungmin replied cheerfully after a few rings, loud music in the background.

You felt bad for calling him. Of course he was celebrating the prize they just received in the morning.

You couldn't bring yourself to say anything.

"Wait, let me get out of here, I can't hear anything." He continued, and after a few seconds, it was almost quiet on the other side, faint sounds from the party he just left being heard.. "Kay, I'm out, how did the dinner go? Did you manage to burn the steak?" He asked you mockingly, and you started sobbing again, loudly.

Your heart was breaking, and you didn't know what to do, what to say, or how to externalise how destroyed you were feeling.

You told Seungmin a few days ago that your anniversary was coming soon, and he seemed so happy for you, he even sent you his favourite steak recipe for you to cook and surprise Jeongin with.

All of it was in vain.

"Hey, what's wrong? Are you crying? Did the idiot do something?!" your friend seemed alarmed. "Ari, please say something, your silence is worrying me."

You gathered all the force you had left in you and breathed in deeply, before finally telling him what happened.

"Min... please... help me." You cried. "He's- oh, God. He's cheating on me."

"WHAT?!" Seungmin shouted, unable to believe his ears. "No, this can't be..." He shook his head, denying. It was impossible. Jeongin loves you.

"Please... please help me. I don't think... I can go through this on my own..."

Seungmin ran as fast as he could and grabbed a cab, trying to calm you down as much as possible over the phone. He started telling you all sorts of stories from his childhood during the 20-minute ride to your apartment, he shared funny things that happened when he was in school, and he tried to distract you from your feelings somehow. You weren't saying anything, but your sobs have quieted down, so he knew that he at least managed to keep you there, as composed as possible, while he was on the way.

He knew your door code; him and Jeongin were best friends, after all, and he was also very close to you himself. He didn't view you as "Jeongin's girlfriend". For him, you were just as important, and you were your own, individual person that he got to know and love during the 5 years he's been within JYPE, and he admired you a lot for your bubbly personality and for how you'd always wear your heart on your sleeve.

He let himself in and ran towards the kitchen, seeing you on your knees on the floor, small shards of glass around you.

One of your hands was bleeding a bit, and you kept your face down, phone still pressed on your ear.

You were a mess.

He's never seen you like this.

You didn't notice him getting inside the house. You weren't able to hear or see anymore. You just felt. And you felt too much.

"Ari?" Seungmin ran to you, taking you into his embrace and holding onto you, as if to wake you up somehow. Your phone fell out of your hand and your arms wrapped around his neck, so he took this chance to pick you up.

You were dressed nicely, in a beautiful red knee-length dress. Seungmin didn't understand how Jeongin could do this to you, who were so perfect, who supported him unconditionally, to the point of moving 5 hours away from the only home you knew to a foreign city where you barely found any friends to hang out with, always too busy making sure that you abided by Jeongin's schedule so you could spend as much time as possible with him.

He couldn't understand and didn't want to believe it, but seeing you like this made it clear that you were telling the truth.

He took you to the bathroom to clean you up and bandage the small wounds on your arms and he tried to ask you about what happened.

"I called him... and he answered accidentally. He was... fucking someone." You clarified between sobs.

"No way..."

"I couldn't believe it either... What did I do wrong, Min?" You asked, almost in a whisper.

"Nothing. You didn't do anything wrong. Don't blame yourself." He replied, gaze cold, as all respect he once held towards Jeongin, who was closest to him in age, was gone.

"What do I do?" You asked again, panic lacing your tone. "I don't know where to go... but I can't stay here."

"Let's pack your clothes... we'll go to my place."

"Min, what if he comes back while we pack?" You cried. You couldn't see Jeongin again. After what he did to you, he didn't deserve even that.

Maybe that made you vengeful, but he deserved to get his heart broken by your absence, just as much as you got yours by his cheating, that is, if he even loved you at all.

You started to doubt it. How could anyone that loves you do this to you? He was supposed to be your person. And you were supposed to be his one and only.

All love went down the drain, heartbreak taking its place.

"Okay, you know what? Screw it." Seungmin helped you stand up. "We'll just... buy new clothes, you don't need to take anything with you. Let's go."

Seungmin grabbed your hand and dragged you out, when he noticed your wallet on the small cabinet near the door. He grabbed it, before continuing to get you two out of the apartment. You glanced back once more before he closed the door, and the place that once held so much warmth in your soul, now simply felt cold and empty.

~

Jeongin always thought you would be there.

As soon as he was done chasing his pleasure for the night, he jumped into a cab, wanting to come home to you.

Your anniversary was tomorrow, so you would probably be surprised to see him come by earlier. He took the next day off just to spend the whole time with you, and he had many things prepared. He wanted to take you out on a nice dinner and felt that he was finally ready to give you the one thing you've been hoping for since you were young.

He bought a ring, ordered a big bouquet of flowers, and had the next day ready to the notch to make it the most memorable anniversary. You deserved this much and more.

Once he got out of the cab, he started leisurely walking towards your apartment building. He was feeling so good, like he was on top of the world. He loved having the best of both worlds, messing around and then having someone to come home to that loved him unconditionally.

Except, this time, you weren't there.

The deafening silence as soon as he stepped through the door made that much clear.

Is she cheating on me? He thought, then cursed himself for projecting on you. After all, you've never given him any reasons to think that, but where could you be so late at night on a Tuesday?

He pulled out his phone and noticed several missed calls from you, and he got worried. Did something happen to you while he was gone? Is that why you weren't home?

However, your phone rang in the house, confusing Jeongin even more. He headed towards the kitchen and noticed a terrible sight: a meal for two carefully prepared and placed on the table, one full glass of wine, and the remains of another scattered all over the floor.

The bottle stood empty on the table, overturned. Did you drink it all?

There were also small red droplets on the ground, which he thought were out of spilled wine, but at closer inspection, he realised that they were blood.

Taking everything into account, it finally clicked.

Your anniversary wasn't tomorrow. It was today.

And he messed up big time.

~

Seungmin called a taxi for the two of you while you tried to stop crying, but still, the tears wouldn't stop flowing. It felt like your whole life flashed in front of your eyes, the once happy memories now making you sour. It didn't help that Jeongin has been such a big part of your life. At this point, you spent more years holding his hand than you spent holding your own, and you no longer knew how to live without him.

You couldn't remember how your life was before meeting Jeongin.

How were you supposed to keep on living?

Seungmin knew Jeongin was going to propose to you tonight, so how could it make any sense that he was out somewhere cheating on you? He loved you so much. Seungmin knew that more than anyone else, being friends to both of you. He was at times even jealous of your relationship, and he so desperately wanted to find someone to love him unconditionally like you loved Jeongin.

He felt horrible. It was like he was experiencing all your feelings as well, but the thing that annoyed him the most was how powerless he was being faced with this situation. He could only watch your heartbreak from the sidelines, and his heart tightened in his chest so much seeing how sad and fragile you looked, breaking down in front of him. What could he do?

One thing was sure, though. He was going to take care of you, that much he knew. But other than that... what? How could he support you?

He held your hand in the taxi tightly as you cried. A friendly gesture. Neither of you cared that the driver was throwing daggers his way, as if Seungmin was the one who wronged you.

When the cab finally arrived in front Seungmin's apartment building, he helped you get out of the car. You didn't look like you were really there. He knew. He noticed that your eyes were not necessarily focusing on anything around you, so it was clear as day that you were hiding somewhere in your mind, trying to make sense of everything.

So, he just held your hand and walked with you until you reached his apartment.

"Wanna take a shower?" Seungmin asked after you took off the high heels you bought just for tonight.

You nodded and went to the bathroom, closing the door behind you without locking it. Despite being friends for so many years, you've never come to Seungmin's apartment. Most outings would be spent either at yours and Jeongin's, or at the dorm where all the boys slept, should they be too busy to return home.

You wondered if Jeongin ever lied to you and told you he's spending the night in the dorms, just to actually spend it with some other girl. Maybe even the one that moaned his name in your ear one hour ago.

You were glad to be in an unfamiliar space that held no memories of your love.

You took off the straps on your shoulder that were holding the dress on your body, letting it fall to the ground. You simply discarded it there, on the floor, stepping on it as if it was nothing. You wanted to burn it; forget you ever bought it. Forget you ever wore it, for it held a lot of meaning, and you hated everything about it now. You hated it. The red was too red, and you loathed it with all your being. You felt the same way towards the red lacy lingerie you've bought for tonight, and if it once reminded you of the passion between you and Jeongin, it now only reminded you of your bloodied, struggling heart. So, you took that off as well, almost throwing up at the sight of it. It was supposed to be discarded on the floor while you made love to Jeongin, not here, in Seungmin's bathroom, while you cried out in agony.

You stepped into the shower and turned the faucet on, letting the cold water hit your skin mercilessly. The cold soon turned to hot, and you found yourself crouched on the floor sobbing your heart out once more. Your make-up was smeared, your thoughts all over the place.

You don't know how long you stayed in there. You only know that you heard Seungmin's voice on the other side of the door asking you if you are okay, at some point.

You weren't, so you didn't say anything.

"Ari, please reply to me, let me know you're okay."

You didn't have the energy.

"Ari, I'm worried about you. Please say something."

You barely heard him. The water felt nice on your skin.

"If you don't give me any sign that you're okay in there in the next 30 seconds I'm going to come in."

Fuck, you couldn't focus on anything. What did he say?

Seungmin tried the handle and was glad to see that the door was unlocked. He came in the bathroom and saw you in the shower. You looked devastated.

He didn't want to invade your privacy, but it was clear that you weren't exactly capable of taking care of yourself right now. He came next to you and just hugged you, not caring about the water wetting his clothes.

He held onto you as your sobs became louder, and his heart broke with yours.

After he heard you calm down a bit, he grabbed some cleanser and wiped your face off all the make-up. He felt bad; you must've spent a lot of time doing your best to look as pretty as possible tonight, not that you had to try too hard. You were extremely beautiful, he always thought so. But he was sad for you, for what happened to this make-up, for what happened to you.

Seungmin turned off the water and grabbed a big towel, wrapping it around you, covering you with it.

"You're all wet." You spoke, surprising him. You've been silent this whole time. He became a bit hopeful that you're still there, not completely taken over by dark thoughts.

"Yea." He chuckled. "See how wet you made me?"

"That's what she said." You joked a bit, making Seungmin laugh. You were broken, but seeing him happy made you a bit happier as well, so you cracked a small smile.

Seungmin didn't realise how much he missed the old you who would smile all the time, who looked like she had no care in the world, until he saw the slight upward curve of your lips.

He liked it so much.

"You are so beautiful when you smile." He told you sincerely.

"Not beautiful enough for Jeongin, apparently." You whispered and let Seungmin help you stand up from the floor and guide you to his bedroom.

"He's an idiot. I can't believe he would do something like that..."

"Yea. Me neither." You replied. It was truly shocking, and you still couldn't quite comprehend why you weren't enough.

"Ari... how do you want to go about this?" Seungmin asks you, his back turned to you as he rummaged through his closet to pull out some clothes for you to wear.

"I don't... want to see him." You spoke lowly. "I can't."

"Okay."

"What am I supposed to do, Min? Where do I go?"

"What do you mean?"

"I have... nowhere. I can't go back to the apartment..."

"Since he fucked up this much, I'm sure he would at least give you that apartment, even if you end up breaking up..." Seungmin said.

"We did break up. Tonight. I don't want anything to do with him anymore." You sighed. "But that... was not the point. I don't want that apartment. Too many memories. I can't even go back home because every damn place there is stained with him. What... do I do? Where do I go?" You felt yourself wanting to cry again but tried to stop the tears from falling. You already had a horrible headache.

"You stay here. We'll think it through together."

"Here?"

"Of course. You're my friend, and I want to help you." Seungmin said and sat down next to you on the bed, grabbing your right hand and holding it tightly.

"I don't want to bother you... I've already gone out of my way and ruined your night of partying." You spoke sadly.

"Fuck partying. If you're not feeling well, I want to be there with you."

"Okay... but can you please not tell him I'm here? I really don't want to see him again, Min."

"Of course. I won't tell him anything." He hugged you. "We'll figure it out."

~

Jeongin became frantic. He understood that he fucked up by not showing up. Fuck, he was so busy with the latest comeback and the full schedule that he completely messed up the days.

He understood that, but where did you go? Why did you leave the phone home? Why were there blood stains on the floor?

Where were you?

He pulled out his phone again and checked his messages to see if you perhaps left him something. He was disappointed to see that you didn't.

Then, he opened his call history to call his best friend, Seungmin. Maybe you were with him. After all, you didn't have many other friends you could go to anyway.

Opening it up, he froze. Besides the few missed calls from you, he noticed that there was a call that went on for almost 5 minutes... one hour prior.

This can't be...

He denied, and looked at the timestamp, hoping that he read it wrong.

There's no way that you called during that time. There's no way he accidentally answered.

There's no way you heard him be unfaithful to you.

But even if you did hear, he couldn't believe you actually left.

You were supposed to always be there. So why? Why did you leave?

In a panicked frenzy, he picked up your phone and looked in your call history as well. There were a few missed calls towards him, that call, and Seungmin's number.

He called Seungmin, who picked up after a few rings.

"Min, is she with you?"

"Who?" his friend replied, unaffected.

"Don't play dumb, I saw she called you!"

"Ari?" Seungmin asked, still with the same unaltered tone.

"YES, SEUNGMIN. ARI." Jeongin articulated the words and shouted, desperate. "Please tell me she's with you. Can I come over? I need to see her. I need to talk to her."

"Hold on. What happened?" Seungmin asked.

"You don't know?!"

"I'm not sure what you're talking about Innie. Calm down a bit and talk me through it."

~

"I'm not sure what you're talking about Innie. Calm down a bit and talk me through it." Seungmin spoke, holding your hand. His phone was on speaker, and he only answered because you urged him to, even if he didn't exactly want to talk to Jeongin.

"Fuck, okay." Jeongin was hyperventilating. "I think... Ari heard something she shouldn't have..."

"I'm not sure I follow?" Seungmin replied, unimpressed. He wanted to hear it from Jeongin himself. "What did she hear?"

"I... fuck, this sounds so bad. I swear it's not like it sounds. I had sex with someone else, and she called, and-"

"Hold on." Seungmin interrupted him. "You cheated on her, is that what you're saying?"

"No! I mean, it was only physical, she wasn't supposed to find out-"

"Wow, you're a piece of shit." Seungmin cursed, as soon as he saw your eyes swell up with tears again. He held your hand tighter.

"Please tell me she's with you. I'm begging you. I need to know she's okay. I need to talk to her and explain."

"What's there to explain? And no, she's not here."

"Don't lie to me!" He shouted again. "I saw she called you!" He repeated.

"She did." Seungmin affirmed. "She asked me to lend her some money, so I asked her to come to the company, and we met up."

"How did she look? Did she seem sad?"

"I don't think so?" Seungmin spoke, unsure. "I didn't notice anything wrong."

"How much money did you give her?"

"I'm not sure, I just gave her my card to withdraw however much she needs, she gave it back and left."

"And you didn't find that suspicious? You didn't ask her anything? You just gave her the card?!"

"Why would I ask anything? It's not my job to coddle or cosset her. Of course I gave her my card, I would do so for any of my friends if they need something. You know that."

"Yes... yes. Fuck. Okay. Maybe she went to a hotel?!"

"I don't know, Innie. Why did you cheat on her?"

"I don't know! I mean, I just wanted to have fun! I really love her, I swear! I wanted to propose on our anniversary, you know that!" Jeongin said hastily, and Seungmin noticed how your heart dropped.

"You wanted to propose... but you slept with someone else?"

"She didn't mean anything, I never slept with the same girl twice-"

"Hold on." Seungmin said, not believing what he was hearing. You didn't seem to be able to believe it either. "You're saying... you cheated multiple times?"

"I told you, it wasn't really cheating! It was purely physical! Ari is the most important thing to me..."

"You're a dumbass." Seungmin scolded him. "The biggest idiot I've ever met."

"I know. I really am an idiot. How do I get her to talk to me? Where did she even go?!"

"You should calm the fuck down first." Seungmin instructed. "And then be responsible for once and own up to your actions."

"But-"

"And if she leaves you, you have to take it."

"What do you mean? She can't- She won't leave me for this, right?"

"Wouldn't you leave yourself?"

"Seungmin! But... she was supposed to be there for me..."

"Look, I'm in the middle of something, and I have no empathy for you right now, so I'm gonna end the call. Let's talk tomorrow." Seungmin spoke hastily, then hung up.

"Wow..." You said, still in denial that Jeongin had not only cheated on you, but he did so multiple times, with multiple different people. Were you that insignificant to him? How could he claim he loves you? How dare he want to propose to you, to tie you two together, when your love life feels like the biggest lie ever told?

"I'm simply speechless." Seungmin held your hand tight.

"Min... tell me. Am I that... undeserving of being loved right? What did I do... to deserve this?"

"Ari, love, you didn't do anything. He's just a piece of crap." He shook his head, still trying to process everything. He would've never, in a million years, seen it coming. "You've been perfect all along. Okay?" He tried to reassure you, but you weren't feeling it.

"Can I go to sleep?" You asked, your voice low. You just wanted to lay in bed and die.

"Sure. Take the bed, and I'm gonna go sleep on the couch."

"Okay..."

~

You laid in bed stirring from left to right, barely able to fall asleep. When you did, you were gone for 15-20 minutes max before you got woken up by another nightmare where Jeongin was having sex with someone else, so you found yourself giving up on sleep altogether and going to the living room to check on Seungmin, who was fast asleep on the couch.

He would probably have a full day tomorrow, so you didn't wake him up.

You made your way towards the kitchen and rummaged through the cabinets to find some tea, and just as you poured your cup, he walked into the room, confusion plastered all over his face.

"Ari? You okay?" He spoke, his voice groggy.

"Yea. Just couldn't sleep. You should take the bed, Min, I can't fall asleep anyway."

"What time is it?" He asked, confused.

"I'm not sure... I left my phone back at the apartment..." You looked away. You wonder if Jeongin would've texted you if you brought your phone with you. If he would've tried calling.

He seemed to want to talk earlier.

No. What he did is unforgivable, so it doesn't matter.

"It's better that way." Seungmin said, shaking his head.

"Huh?" You replied, forgetting for a second what he was referring to.

"Leaving your phone there..."

"Oh... I guess..."

"Are you... breaking up with him for real?"

"I mean," you chuckled, "should I stay? After he broke my heart like that? Would you stay?"

"No... of course not."

"It really sucks." You finished pouring down your tee and took the mug, placing it on the kitchen table. You sat down and watched the steam rise up in the air and tried to forget it all.

"Yea." Seungmin agreed, pouring down a cup himself while yawning.

"You could've told me you want some tea as well, I would've-"

"That's okay." He waved his hand around to brush you off.

"Min, you should really go to sleep... when do you have to go to the company?"

"We have a day off tomorrow, actually."

"Oh." You let your head down, avoiding his gaze.

"So, what should we do tomorrow? What's the plan?" He asked you, making you raise your head to look back at him.

"The plan...? I don't know, Min."

"You need a phone, and some clothes, so we should go get them."

"Can't we just order them? I don't feel like going out..."

"No. You can't just stay in bed absentmindedly losing yourself. We will go out, have a fun time shopping, eat good food, then sleep."

"And then... what? What do I do, Min?" You stood up and found your wallet, counting all the cash you kept inside. Not much, unfortunately. "I don't have enough money to move out-"

"I'll help you."

"Wait, I'm not finished. Even if I did, do I stay here, in Seoul? Should I go back and have my parents scold me for no longer being with Jeongin? Should I go back where he can also find me? It sucks so bad." You covered your face with your hands, annoyed by every damn thing around you.

Seungmin hummed, feeling that you still wanted to rant a bit more.

"I'm so upset. Should I quit my job at the Café? I mean, it's not like I can keep it, Jeongin will come look after me there first things first tomorrow morning. But if I quit it, how the fuck am I going to pay for anything? I obviously don't want to use his money anymore. Fuck, I can't even check how much is on my card with my phone being at the apartment..."

"Hey, let's calm down a bit. We'll take everything step by step." Seungmin spoke, wanting to comfort you. You were definitely overthinking it, and he didn't want to let you do that to yourself.

"How the fuck am I supposed to calm down?"

"That's fair. I say we think first of what you should do in terms of staying in Seoul or going back to your hometown. Obviously, if you stay here, you have a place to stay, which is this apartment."

"Seungmin, you're the best friend in the world, but I can't burden you like that. I will take advantage of your kindness for a few days max, until I figure it out."

"Love, you would never burden me. You're a very important friend, so of course I'm going to want to help you as much as I can." He found your hand on the table and held onto it for a few seconds to comfort you, before removing it. "If you want to move out, I'll help pay for an apartment, but why would we do that, when this one here is barely being used? I'm almost always in the dorms."

"You say that, but what if you'd want to bring someone home?" You chuckled nervously.

"What, to have sex?" Seungmin laughed. "There are hotels for that, Ari. And besides, I've never brought anyone here."

"Really?" You raised an eyebrow, not really believing it. You did know Seungmin had various flings along the years, nothing serious, so it wasn't that shocking, but he had a few relationships that lasted for a few months – didn't he bring anyone back here?

"Yep." He nodded. "So my point is, why pay for something when we already have one ready for you? Stay here."

"Okay... but what would I even do here, Min? I barely have any friends, and I'll soon be jobless."

"What would you do back home?" He shrugged. "It would be kind of the same, but with all the memories, wouldn't it?"

"Yea, you're right."

"You can always find another job you like here. It's a big city."

"It just sucks because I'm not good at anything."

"Don't say that." He scolded you.

"It's true, though. The only thing I was good at was loving him, and even that wasn't enough..."

"Hey."

"All I'm saying is, no wonder he cheated on me, since I'm so dumb and can't do anything right."

"You're not dumb, Ari. You're one of the most clever people I've ever met."

"Min, you always call me dumb." You joked, knowing how much he usually likes to tease you when you do something stupid.

"In a loving way! God!" He laughed. "Okay, we're going to go even more into the basics, then. "What do you like to do?"

"Uhm... I'm not sure? Cooking, maybe? I like baking sweets..." You replied, lost in thought. What did you like to do besides spending time with Jeongin?

"Great! We're starting with that, then. What if you do a course and get a certification on it? Then maybe you can open up a small bakery or something."

"That sounds... kinda nice, actually."

"Wanna look tomorrow into some programs?" Seungmin smiled as you nodded, a smile on your face. It felt like a good idea to do something for yourself. Until now, you always wanted to be as free as possible and adjusted your schedule as much as you could to fit Jeongin's, so you never really did things for yourself.

Thinking about it, you realise you've been living more for him than you did for you. What a stupid mistake.

~

The next day, Seungmin took you shopping as promised. He drove you to a mall in a nearby city, wanting to minimise the chances of someone recognising him.

He first bought you a phone, then you went to several stores and bought a whole new wardrobe for you. By the end of the day there were so many bags in the car, you feared there was not enough space to fit everything.

You also went out to eat at a cute restaurant, and even if you barely had an appetite, you indulged Seungmin and finished everything he put in front of you on the table.

You felt grateful to have him as a friend.

~

It's been a few days and no sight of you. Jeongin was becoming desperate. He called up all your friends, but no one knew anything about a break-up, and after a week he finally decided to talk to your parents.

"She's not here." They told him. "She sent us a text to let us know that if you call, to tell you she's doing fine, and that she wishes to be left alone for the time being, and that it's over. But Innie, you do know that we love you like you're our son, right? Please know we don't agree with our stupid daughter. Forgive her when she finally comes to her senses."

Forgive you? What is there to forgive? He's the one who screwed up.

Not knowing anything about you fucked with his head so much, he started messing up on choreographies. Everyone seemed upset with him when they ultimately heard of what he did, and Chan even scolded him for throwing away what you two had for some casual sex.

The one who seemed the most upset of it all, though, was Seungmin. He would barely look at him, and if he did, he would have grimace written all over his face.

Still, Seungmin insisted he didn't know anything about you, no matter how much he would ask.

~

Three months later, you were definitely making progress. You started going to a Cooking Academy Seungmin found for you. He enrolled you into a 12-month program where you would learn how to cook all sorts of desserts, so you were quite excited to go through with all of it.

Mentally, though, you were still hurt. You haven't spoken to Jeongin at all, or even seen him, besides on TV when you watched Stray Kids' newest music videos or award show performances. You wanted to see them for Seungmin, even if he insisted you didn't have to. Still, Seungmin was your best friend, and you wanted to engage in what he was doing, as much as he engaged in conversations about baking school with you.

It was hard at first to see Jeongin on TV. He didn't look good; he was haggard and skinnier, and no amount of make-up could hide the emptiness in his eyes. You felt bad for him, for never giving him the chance to explain himself, but what good would it have done? You knew you would never be able to forgive him. But you watched all the content for Seungmin, who's quite literally been your rock ever since the break-up.

You started enjoying Seungmin's company more and more, and you liked how invested he was in your new-found baking passion, and in bettering yourself.

"... and that's apparently how macarons are made. It's quite a simple recipe, but if you mess up the consistency of the batter, the macarons would be too crunchy. You can also mess up the buttercream, so yea, it's tough." You laughed, watching Seungmin follow you closely.

"That's so cool though!"

"Right?! And there are so many flavours too! How am I supposed to remember how to do all of them?"

"We should maybe go and raid all the bakeries in town and buy all the flavours to check your future competition." He joked, making you laugh.

Every day it was getting easier and easier for you to smile, and you knew Seungmin had everything to do with it. You started liking the attention he was giving you, and that was a bit scary.

"Ari...? I don't want you to take it the wrong way, but... May I suggest something?"

"Yea?" You smiled, not sure of what he wanted to say.

"I love seeing you a bit happier... but I know."

"You know...?" You asked, unsure of what he meant.

"I know you still cry yourself to sleep every night, and I know you're only functioning when I'm around you and force you to gulp down food and stay hydrated and exercise." He looked at you blankly. You didn't really want to have this conversation.

"I don't know what you-"

"Ari." He grabbed your hand. "It's okay to get help. I think it would be really beneficial if you sought out counselling. You should learn how to process this grief in a healthy way. What do you say?"

Of course, he was right. After all, you weren't the best at processing your emotions, and you still held a lot of resentment towards Jeongin. You also weren't sure if you would ever be able to trust someone in a future possible relationship.

"Yea... that would be good."

"Great! Shall we look at therapists together?" Seungmin smiled.

~

Jeongin was in the practice room with the boys, finishing up a choreography.

He found that not even the weekly sex he would have with someone random would do the trick anymore. He missed you.

He got better at hiding it, though. He no longer screwed up when singing or dancing, but he still loved you like crazy, and was still in denial that you actually left and that he hasn't heard from you in 11 months now.

"It's her birthday and I can't even text her..." He complained to Seungmin. They weren't that close anymore, but he still considered him a friend.

"That sucks." The boy replied indifferently, and Jeongin felt once again completely disregarded.

"Why are you punishing me, hm?! Isn't it enough that Ari's been doing it for almost a year?!"

"I don't think she's punishing you, man." Seungmin shrugged.

"What if she's not doing well? I want to be there for her!"

"Didn't you say you've been calling her parents lately and that she updates them regularly to let them know she's fine? She's probably just doing her best to keep going without you. Let her be."

"But I miss her so much... By the way, who are you texting so happily? I swear you've been grinning like an idiot for 10 minutes straight."

"No one." Seungmin quickly closed his phone. "Just a friend."

"What about Ari, have you talked to her?"

"No, not really." He shrugged. "She did contact me to return the money she borrowed, but that was pretty much it."

"So you have her number?! Give it to me!" Jeongin stood up from the floor and ran towards Seungmin, who scoffed.

"I don't. She asked me to delete it and to never contact her again."

"She really doesn't want to have anything to do with us anymore, huh?" Jeongin looked away.

~

"Happy birthday!" Seungmin shouted, coming through the door of the apartment with a big cake in his hands.

"Min? You're home?" You ran out from the living room to meet him at the door and take the cake from his hands while he took off his shoes. "I thought you had practice today!" You shouted from the kitchen before running back into his arms like a kid.

"Nope, all free to spend time with my most precious friend on her birthday!" He praised you and hugged you tightly.

"Thank you. I'm happy to see you. But I'm not even dressed properly!" You whined about how you only wore some trousers and a T-shirt, not even bothering to put on a bra since you weren't aware that you'd have company. You moved a bit away, your arms still around his neck.

You wanted to kiss him.

You already knew you've been having feelings for him for a while, as your therapist walked you through all these complicated things in your heart for a while.

But still, you didn't.

"How was your day?" You asked, walking back to the kitchen to cut off two pieces of the cake.

"Wait! You have to blow out the candles first." Seungmin pulled out a pack of multicolour spiral candles and put them clumsily on the cake, as he started singing Happy Birthday to you. He had a beautiful voice.

It was weird. This was the first birthday without Jeongin in the past 13 years, but you weren't really sad. Sure, it was bittersweet, but you didn't feel as devastated about it as you thought you would.

Hearing Seungmin sing did bring a few tears to your eyes, though, and before he was able to finish the song, you went to him and hugged him again, putting your arms around his neck and pulling him closer to you. The last chorus was whispered between you two.

"So... what is your wish, Ari?" He whispered in your ear once the song was over, his hands touching the back of your waist, making you quiver a bit.

"I think... I have everything someone could wish for, Min." You spoke softly. "I have you."

"Mhm." He hummed. "You do."

He was the one to move his head away this time, and he looked deeply in your eyes. The only light in the room were the burning candles on your birthday cake that you didn't want to bother with at that moment.

You liked Seungmin.

And you wanted to kiss him.

And the way his eyes kept moving to your lips told you that he wanted to kiss you too.

So, with a leap of courage, you pressed your lips against his and closed your eyes tightly.

He didn't push you away. On the contrary, his hands on your back brought you closer to him, and he deepened the kiss, his tongue circling your upper lip.

You opened your mouth and tasted him, and it felt like none of the cakes you were going to bake in the Academy would even come close to how sweet he tasted on your tongue.

You tugged his collar before letting your hands fall to his chest, your fingers fighting with the small stubborn buttons that didn't want to pop open.

When you were finally successful in your contest and his torso was naked, you let your hands roam on him to feel his muscles.

He placed his hands on yours and stopped you from examining him further, then spun you around, pressing his body to yours. You felt his bulge on your bum and felt an incredibly uncomfortable feeling of needing to be touched right then and there.

"Blow out the candles first, love." He whispered in your ear, his hands moving from your stomach to your chest, cupping your breasts and squeezing them, making you let your head fall back, on his shoulder, and moan in pleasure.

"Come on." He moved his hands back down and got them under your shirt this time, his fingers grazing the sensitive skin on your abdomen, moving higher and higher, until they were on your bare breasts.

"Fuck." You moaned, but tried to focus on the task at hand, knowing that Seungmin was waiting for you.

You followed his directions and watched the room become dark as you blew out all of the candles in one breath, and your heart started beating faster in anticipation as Seungmin's hand played with your boobs, fingers slowly massaging your nipples.

"Should we go to the bedroom?" He spoke, letting you go for a bit, waiting to hear you either accept or deny his proposal.

Neither of you thought that what you were about to do was wrong, and you were glad that there weren't any feelings of guiltiness shared, since Seungmin was genuinely a gentleman who let you process and discover your feelings in your own rhythm. He also didn't think he's ever going to end up in this position with you, as he never allowed himself to think of you as an available woman, but once you broke up with Jeongin and started spending so much time with him, everything came by naturally.

He had the biggest crush on you, and he was glad to see that you were reciprocating.

You grabbed Seungmin's hand and guided him to the bedroom, where he started kissing you again. Your breaths became one, and your feelings for the other were growing with each piece of clothing that would fall on the floor.

Once both of you were naked, he guided you to the bed and pressed his body on yours, his member at your already wet enough entrance. However, he didn't want to go about your first time together this way. He wanted to get as much as possible of you, so he sprawled wet kisses all over your body, before letting his head fall between your legs, licking your needy pussy.

You moaned each time he would lick you up, and when his tongue started teasing your entrance, you became needier than ever.

"Please, Min. I want you. No, I need you inside me." You whined, pulling on his hair and hoping he would give it to you as soon as possible.

He obliged, as he got on top of you and kissed you deeply, his dick sliding into you with ease. You were so ready for him, he almost burst out at the intense feeling.

His thrusts became eager, as your hands roamed on your body and left scratch marks on his back whenever he would get more intense.

"Fuck, Min, you are the best." You moaned and praised him, all your previous times having sex with Jeongin long forgotten as Seungmin satisfied you this good. "Should we switch positions?"

"Do you want on top, love?" He bit your neck, bringing out another moan out of your mouth.

"Yes, please." You replied, feeling his weight disappear from you. He plopped on the bed next to you and signalled you to come on top of him, which you swiftly did, letting your body fall down on his as his dick disappeared in your cunt.

You haven't had sex in a while, but it appeared you didn't forget how to move your hips up and down to pleasure Seungmin.

He loved the sight of you on top of him, moving so confident, your tits bouncing. He couldn't help but sit up to bite your neck and move inside of you as well, and you came undone after a few thrusts.

Your orgasm was powerful, and his followed soon after as well, both of you laying down embraced next to the other and breathing heavily.

"That was so good." You spoke, caressing Seungmin's chest.

"It was the best sex I've ever had." He confessed. "Probably my feelings for you have something to do with that."

"Min..."

"Look, I don't want to force you into anything, but I genuinely like you, and would love to date you if you feel ready, and if you feel the same thing."

"I do!" You confessed as well, kissing him. "I like you so much, Min."

"That's... wow. Okay. I wasn't really expecting that." He chuckled.

"I really do. If you feel weird about Jeongin-"

"Screw that guy. I don't care about him." Seungmin cut you off, but you needed to tell him something that's been on your mind for some time now.

"Min, I really wanted to get your opinion on something... regarding Jeongin."

"I'm listening."

"The therapist... told me I should be more honest with myself. And after speaking with her for a bit, I realised that... I should talk to Jeongin and get closure, hear him out... What do you say?"

"I don't know, Ari..." Seungmin replied, dejected. He started to worry that all your feelings for him would come back if you were to see him again, but if he started dating you, he knew you would inevitably get to meet him at one point or another.

"If you're uncomfortable with that, I won't see him." You kissed his neck, wanting to show him that you no longer had any romantic feelings towards Jeongin that were worth destroying your new relationship.

"No. You should talk to him, as long as that would help you heal."

"Why are you so good to me?" You smiled. "Thank you for everything, Min. I don't think I could ever repay you. I only have this heart to give you, if you want it."

~

"You're a lying piece of shit! I fucking believed you!" Jeongin came screaming towards Seungmin the very next day, wanting to punch his face. He stopped at the last second, though, noticing the confusion plastered on his friend's face.

"What do you mean?"

"What is this, hm? What the fuck is this, Seungmin?!" Jeongin pulled out his phone and showed him a picture of him and you taken when he took you shopping so many months ago.

"Wait, where is this from?" Seungmin became concerned. Why is this photo surfacing now, and why is the title 'Scandal between Stray Kids! Jeongin's girlfriend cheating on him with Seungmin!'

"You ask like you don't know! You've been helping her out the whole time?!"

"That article is a bigger problem for us right now, Jeongin!"

"It's already been taken care of! This is just a screenshot! Now tell me why the fuck did you keep everything from me?!"

"Jeongin, calm down, will you?" Seungmin tried to ration with him, but it was getting difficult, as Jeongin kept throwing things around the room.

"I can't fucking believe it. How come you never let me see her once?!"

"She didn't want to see you."

"I should've been the one next to her yesterday celebrating her birthday, not you!"

"Jeongin, you are aware that you lost that privilege when you took her love for granted and cheated on her, right?"

Hearing Seungmin's cold words, the younger let himself fall down. He was right. Jeongin cheated on you, so he had no grounds to be upset that you cut him off from your life.

"She does want to talk to you, though..." Seungmin started reluctantly.

"She does?!"

"Yes... She asked me to tell you to drop by at this address if you want to meet her."

"Oh! Oh God! That's amazing! Okay, that's-"

"BUT, don't get your hopes up. She's not doing it to get back with you."

"It doesn't matter, I'll talk to her, and-"

"No, Jeongin. What I'm saying is, I'm dating her."

Seungmin's words cut through Jeongin's heart like glass. He didn't want to believe it.

~

"Thank you for coming." You smiled weakly seeing your ex-boyfriend, anxiety rising in your chest. You were afraid that you're going to start loving him again when you saw him, but were happy to see that it wasn't the case.

You grew a lot since the last time you two saw each other. You've been working on yourself, you were almost done with the baking course, your therapy was going great and you found a lot of love in Seungmin, even before you two confessed and got together.

Jeongin, however, still loved you.

"Ari... you look amazing." He complimented you, his face falling down in shame. "I should thank you for giving me a chance to explain why I did what I did."

"I'm listening." You smiled.

"I know it's unforgivable... and I'm sorry. I have no excuse. I wanted to live the 'young and free' lifestyle and I didn't realise what the two of us have. I took it for granted. I was sure you're going to be there no matter what, but now... I realise how stupid and selfish I was. And I... still love you. So, so much. I miss you."

He looked into your eyes, and he was glad that there was still warmth in them towards him. He was scared to see what he would find, but now he was relieved.

"I see..." You nodded in understatement, finding it baffling that your relationship truly ended for something insignificant like that. It was freeing, even, to know that you weren't at fault for it. "Thank you for telling me."

Jeongin reached over the table to grab your hand, but you pulled it back and put it in your lap.

"Do you think... there's still hope for us?"

"Jeongin, I want to be honest to you. What you did to me broke my heart into a million pieces, and it took me a long time to be okay again. I really didn't think I would be able to get through it."

"I'm so sorry, Ari." Jeongin started tearing up. "I truly am."

"However," you continued. "I pushed through, I went to therapy, I started living for myself... and I'm okay now. I'm happy. I'm even in a new relationship now, and I love him so much for being there for me." You smiled.

"So... Seungmin, huh?" He chuckled. "He's a great guy."

"He was there holding my hand... when no one else was." You smiled again, feeling more in love with your boyfriend than ever. While you sat on the sidelines and gave your all to support Jeongin and his career, putting your life on hold, Seungmin actively encouraged you to work towards doing something you love, to become the best version of yourself.

You were loved.

"I don't want to pretend the last 12 years never existed." You spoke. "You were really important to me, and a piece of my heart will always be yours. But... I moved on. And I really hope you will find the strength to do it too."

You got up from the table and hugged Jeongin, who didn't say anything else, then left the Café.

~

"How was it?" Seungmin anxiously asked you as soon as you stepped through the door of the apartment. He's been fidgeting the whole time and seeing him so nervous made you chuckle a bit. You truly, truly liked him.

"It was fine. We talked about what happened... and now I can really say I've moved on." You came closer to Seungmin and hugged him. "Thank you, Min."

"What are you thanking me for?" He hugged you back.

"For trusting me. I bet it was hard on you to let me meet up with the man I've spent the last 12 years of my life with."

"I'm really, really happy that you're not breaking up with me to go back to him."

"How could I, Min? I love you so much." You separated your bodies and kissed him. "I'm so grateful to have you in my life."

"I love you too." He confessed.

"Should we go for round two, then?" You winked playfully and pointed towards the bedroom.

"You don't have to ask me twice." He picked you up and spun you around, taking you to the room and closing the door behind him.

~The End~

[sarahrogersevans]

o.k I LOVE THOR, SO I WOULD LOVE TO REQUEST WHERE GF READER BRINGS THOR WORLD DISNEY FLORIDA FOR THE FIRST TIME!!!

A Very Magical Vacation- Thor Odinson xreader fan fic request

Summary: Y/N Thor’s gf takes Thor to Walt Disney world in Florida for the first time and Y/N does something very special for her boyfriend

Warnings: Angsty, fluff, comfort fluff, Thor getting a bit emotional from being happy and sad, happy fluff fic

~Y/N’s POV~

I’m really excited, I just got Thor and I passed to go to Disney world in Orlando for our anniversary and I know Thor has never been to Disney world before and I wanted to surprise him and after everything he’s been through I wanted to do something really special for the love of my life. I just checked my email for the confirmation and I booked the hotel and everything and I printed everything I needed and I closed my laptop and I went out to the kitchen and I saw Thor cooking us dinner and I went over to him and gave him a hug. Thor smiled at me and pulled me in closer and stroked my hair gently and said “hello darling oh how I love when you give me affection like this Y/N, so tell me what were you up to? Were you catching up on some work?”

I shook my head and said “not exactly, here close your eyes Thor I have a surprise for you.” He closed his eyes and said “alright my eyes are closed love, what’s going on?” I got the confirmation out and said “alright open your eyes!” I showed him the papers I printed and I smiled at Thor and said “Surprise!! I got us tickets to Disney world next week!!” Thor got really excited and picked me up hugging me and twirled me around gently and then put me down to kiss me and said “oh wow!! I’ve never been to Disney world, I’m so excited! Thank you Y/N!!” I kissed him and said “you’re welcome Thor I know you’ve been through a lot and I know we both could use a vacation so I thought this would be a good idea.” Thor caressed my cheek softly with a smile on his face and said “how did I get so lucky with a wonderful goddess like you?” I blushed at his sweet compliment and I hugged Thor tight.

Later after dinner I went ahead and started to pack for our trip next week and I double checked to make sure my surprise at Disney world for Thor was in place and then Thor and I went to bed to try and get some rest though the anticipation was killing me.

————- time skip to next week——

The week for our trip was here and Thor helped us finish packing and we both got on the road. During the drive down to Florida Thor and I listened to music in the car together and we both sang along to the music and had a really nice time.

A few days later we got to Florida and checked in to our hotel and put our bags in the hotel room and then I changed my outfit and got my backpack ready for the day and Thor came over to me really excited and said “hey love are you ready to head over to Disney world??” I smiled and I loved seeing Thor so excited about this and I said “I am very ready babe! Let’s go have some fun.” My surprise for Thor was gonna be on our last day to Disney so the first few days we walked around the parks and a lot of people came up to Thor and asked for a picture and I could tell he enjoyed it a lot and every so often Thor and I would take a romantic selfie together and Thor got excited seeing all the characters walking around and we both got photos with them and bought some souvenirs.

The night before our last day in Florida Thor and I cuddled in bed in our hotel room and I was laying next to Thor and he had his arm around me and said “Y/N this trip has been so amazing thank you for bringing us here and I can’t believe we’ve been together three years already these three years have been quite an adventure, I love you Y/N thank you for staying by me and loving me, I don’t know what I’d do without you, I love you.”

I smiled at Thor and leaned in to kiss him softly and I said “I love you too Thor, very much and tomorrow I have one more surprise for you when we go to Disney I’m thinking you might like it.” Thor looked at me and said “darling, what are you planning?” I grinned and said “oh you’ll just have to see tomorrow.”

The very last day of our trip I grabbed my costume out and got it on and did my make up and then I walked out and said “hey Thor, what do you think?” He smiled at me and said “oh my gosh.. you look stunning my love! Did you dress up as your favorite Disney character??” I nodded and fixed my hair while looking in the mirror and said “I thought it would be fun, does it look ok?” Thor nodded and kissed my cheek and said “Y/N my love it looks amazing you are gonna be the hit of Disney.” I felt so special and I loved how Thor always made me feel like I mattered and that I was loved.

So I knew the avengers park was at universal but I asked for a favor and asked the if someone could come dressed as Loki and would come meet Thor and talk to him and hug him so Thor could have that overdue moment with his brother that he deserved to and I knew the perfect spot. Thor and I walked through the park and then we walked to the spot I asked to meet at and Thor saw someone dressed as Loki and I saw Thor get emotional and said “Loki?.. is that you brother?” He turned around and looked at Thor with a smile and said “hello brother it’s good to see you.” I appreciated how the actor stayed in character for him and Thor hugged the guy and I heard him cry a bit and the actor hugged him back and said “don’t worry brother I’m always with you.” Thor came back over to me and hugged me and I held him close and said “shhh I know Thor it’s ok I hope this helped.”

Thor smiled at me and moved a strand of my hair behind my ear and said “did you do this for me Y/N?” I nodded and said “I did Thor, I wanted it to be a surprise I love you and I wanted this to be a trip you wouldn’t forget. And I know how important Loki is to you.” Thor kissed my forehead and pulled me into a hug and said “love just being here with you and you doing this for me, means more to me than you know, thank you my princess I love you.” I kissed him and said “I love you so much Thor I’m glad we did this.” Thor smiled and said “so am I Y/N happy anniversary my love, thank you for a magical vacation.”

Thor and I got a picture with the Loki character and then spent the rest of the day together at Disney before going home a few days later. I’d say this trip was a very successful one.

Hey lovely!! I hope you like it and I hope this is close to what you wanted 🤗💜 enjoy xx

Taglist:

@jessybarnes

@lokiandbuckysdoll

@sunshine-on-my-mind

@anotherfuckingmarvelfanaccount

[rosecoloredknight]

My favorite artist is on a UK tour at the moment, however he will be performing in Chicago on the 12th & 13th of October so I decided to check, just to play around with my budget a little, if I can do a round trip (?) on the day before or same day? meaning I arrive on one of the days he'll be performing and then either leave back home later that night or the next day? honestly, it SEEMED DOABLE, but concert tickets were sold out. Flight tickets were going to be $375 that's why I was !!! OKAY SOUNDS DOABLE, because then I'd just needed to buy concert tickets, book a hotel room for the day, and have enough for taxi/Lyft. Maybe $800 max, to be safe? However I'm confused.. $375 to go over there then another $375 to come back orrrr... just a one time payment of $375?

I should be a little more responsible tho - I paid one of my debts and can honestly pay all of my remaining debts right now, BUT fuck that, THAT'S my WA Olympic and maybe Mt. Rainier NP trip money. I've worked hard for this and I know I can always go next year with a clear debt/slate, but I'm trying to see if I can visit on my birthday month.

Question for anyone who has bought passes for hikes? Which by the way, until last year, I was clueless that they even existed and were necessary — are these two down below the right ones? It's okay if no one is for sure about it or no one responds, just sharing this just in case someone does know.

wtf does "transferable between two vehicles" even mean?

Alrighty, I'm gonna go back to watching reels and stories from people who are posting performances of my favorite artist 🫡

[thatrickmcginnis]

VOIVOD Montreal 1989

Sometimes I forget how ambitious I was when I was young. I had sold a portrait or two from the film festival to the Village Voice in the fall of 1989 when Edna Suarez, their photo editor, called me from New York to ask how hard it would be for me to get to Montreal to shoot a band. I didn't tell her that it was no small trip given Canadian distances, but I wanted the job really badly, so I mumbled something about taking the train and got the assignment to photograph Voivod, a heavy metal band from Quebec who had just shifted from noisy thrash to a complex prog metal that would give birth to a whole subgenre. I got the phone number for the band's manager and arranged a day for the shoot, then got on the phone with VIA Rail. (Canada's Amtrak. Keep in mind this was the pre-internet world, and my only other option would have been going to a travel agent or down to Union Station to book a ticket, which I'd have to do anyway to pay for my fare once it was reserved.) I was on an overnight train from Toronto to Montreal - over eight hours in a coach seat, but thankfully they didn't charge for baggage, and I would be bringing most of my studio with me - two cameras, light stands and the ProFoto ProAcute 6 strobe kit I'd just bought with money I'd inherited after my mother had died.

Voivod are, in my opinion, one of a half dozen really original bands that have come out of Canada. (Also on that list: Simply Saucer, NoMeansNo, Death From Above 1979.) I'd liked them since early, abrasive records like Rrröööaaarrr, and wasn't the only one intrigued by their new, prog-ier direction, as they'd caught the attention of the music critics at the Village Voice enough to warrant a feature in their end-of-year Pazz & Jop poll, for which I was providing the photos. I arrived in Montreal early on a Saturday morning to find that the city had just been blanketed by a snowstorm. I hauled all my camera gear upstairs from the Gare Centrale to the dining room of the Queen Elizabeth hotel for breakfast, to wait for Voivod's manager. He showed up just as I was finishing, and helped me carry my gear to his car, and we set out for the band's rehearsal space in a big complex out in a Montreal industrial suburb. Everyone seemed baffled but flattered that a New York magazine would send a photographer all the way from Toronto for a photo shoot, but I scoped out the room - your standard stark cube in an old warehouse building, with windows high on one wall and egg cartons covering the other walls to provide cheap acoustic insulation.

I worked hard to deliver a lot of options from my photo shoot with Voivod in their Montreal rehearsal space. Thankfully I had the luxury of time and subject who were, most of the time, engaged with the task at hand. I also lit the hell out of it, using all three of the heads in my strobe kit to provide everything from flattering soft light, moody "horror movie" light from below, and hard light shooting almost directly into my Nikon F3 to make the lens flare. I had the band pose in the usual, full-length band shots, looming above me as I kneeled on the floor, and huddled together screaming their lungs out. But my most successful set-up was composed with my new Rolleiflex - the band lit from above against a backdrop of egg crates, looking up into the light as if they're about to be raptured, or abducted by friendly aliens. That was the one I was certain that Edna at the Village Voice would like the most, and I was right. (I'd prove it to you if I could find the tearsheets which, I fear, may be long lost.) I definitely lost money on the gig after paying for cabs to and from the train station, my ticket, and breakfast at the Queen Elizabeth. But I seemed to pass the test and continued to get work from Edna for several years, first at the Voice and then at the New York Times when she moved there. Voivod are still together, and released Morgöth Tales, their 16th record, last year. Sadly guitarist Denis "Piggy" D'Amour died of colon cancer in 2005.

[ancuninbrainrot]

My Dragoncon ADVENTURE (slightly abridged)

Or, "how this trip was entirely cursed." This is so long, so cutting it.

I have wanted to go to Dragoncon for decades, but I live far away and the cost has always been hideously prohibitive. But this year, the stars fell into place and ya girl had enough money to go. Tickets bought, plane tickets bought, cheap hotel booked, gonna grab Lyfts to and from because my childhood memories of Atlanta traffic told me this was NOT an option.

So I get to the airport on Thursday 2 hours early. Line up at the gate to figure out where I needed to be.

My flight had been canceled. I'd received notice THAT DAY from the third party site I booked through that I was good to go. So I sit on hold with them for 45 minutes because babies, I have nothing but time. Meanwhile I'm booking a same day flight, which leaves about 2 hours later, has a stop in DC, and then off to ATL (side note, not having a direct flight to ATL is stupid, I have NEVER not been routed through there).

Get the booking sorted with American Airlines, prepare to wait. I have books, I have headphones, emergency granola bars...we're fine. Get to DC, about 2 hours layover, grab some truly disgusting chili and settle down.

Check email. Flight from DC to ATL canceled. Go to customer service, which is ofc a ginormous line (This will be a theme). They give us handouts essentially saying, "please just go on the website." I do. Next flight they can offer is the next afternoon...with a 10 hour layover in Dallas Ft. Worth. Look at a map and explain that to me.

I'm still in line for the customer service desk, because maybe they have a better option. They do not. They can get me there Saturday afternoon!

Did I mention I have a 4-day pass and a hotel booked from Thursday to Tuesday? Glad I'm made of cash.

So I book a flight with Delta, get a hotel near DCA that has a shuttle service, and go to grab my bags.

I do not get to leave the hellscape of DCA until 10:30 p.m. I got to my local airport at 10:30 a.m. This should have taken about half that time with the last minute booking. I can’t leave because they made me check my single carryon because every aspect of air travel is designed to be the worst possible experience. And ofc since the plane was canceled due to weather, the baggage carriers can't unload the plane in case Thor seeks his revenge on puny mortals.

So we all wait in the endless hell of DCA's baggage claim. It is a desolate prison with approximately 5 seats. The rest of us are sitting on concrete floors for hours while occasionally, maybe every 20 minutes a single bag will make it off the plane and onto the conveyor belt.

I use this time to call my other hotel and try to explain what's going on, to try and coordinate things (because there was supposed to be a car to get me to the hotel in Atlanta, but obviously that's not happening). The ride company tries to get shitty with me and I tell them to keep their $30 because I don't have the time or patience. I read fanfic, I eat a granola bar, and I wait because I have NO OTHER OPTIONS. Trust me, I checked to see how long it would take to just goddamn drive to Atlanta. Finally I am free, and the shuttle is there, and the hotel is much nicer than I pick because I didn't have a choice.

The next day I eat a reasonable hotel breakfast (freeeeeee), get to the airport and things go fine. ATL is less of a hellmouth, I get my bag, grab a Lyft, have several moments of confusion with the front desk about my reservation, get up to my room and debate going to the con. Nah. Rest, steam the wrinkles out of my clothes, have a food.

Google is amazingly unhelpful about delivery here, but Pizza Hut will deliver in about 45 minutes. It's a Friday night, that's fine. It takes an hour and a half. Did I mention I hadn't eaten since breakfast? My blood sugar hates me and I also hate me.

I get up the next day, try to figure out which hotel I should be dropped off at, pick wrong, and walk there. Wait in line for an hour to get badge, and I am free. Dragoncon is across like 5 hotels. There is no fast way to do anything, nor any way to see and do things you want to because they are packed fucking schedules. I sit in at a couple panels (full, so mostly on the floor). I find out where the signings are, not realizing the authors and actors are in 2 different, non adjacent buildings, so I am in the actor's hall. Or at least I am in another line to get in there.

Time passes. We get in. I do a circle and see Neil Newbon's table and have a mini crisis.

I am HERE for BG3, and Neil specifically. I am, however, the worst human in the world at interacting with people whose work I admire. This is why I wanted my husband along, but he didn't think there'd be enough for him to do. So I made insane plans to try and mitigate my bad brain. I know immediately that my struggles have been in vain and I will absolutely fuck this up. But I've traveled too far and I will DO THE THING DAMMIT.

I don't want to say the con was not prepared for the draw of Neil. But the line for him is bananas, weirdly spread out into 3 overflows. We get through the first couple in a reasonable-ish amount of time. And we are in overflow one, huzzah. By this point I've been chatting with the other people in line, talking cosplays and whatnot, we're all friends here.

Well. Then the actors leave for photo ops. We try to settle, we tell each other our hopes and dreams, we are yelled at for sitting, 2 of them make a dash for water, I give a starving college cosplayer one of my emergency snacks, and he's adorably grateful ("do you want me to give you something for this?" "No, I want you to eat it, man.").

And Neil returns! And now I can see him and my knees aren't okay and my hands are shaking. FUCKERY BLAST IT, WHY AM I SO BAD AT THIS? I am a competent, funny, smart person. I can talk to anyone, I speak on panels, I am not shy, dammit.

His helper asks me what I want, and I say a signature. "You want him to put something particular?" "No." "Sorry?" "No thanks." I am too quiet and anyone who has ever been in my proximity knows that is NOT NORMAL. My nervous stupid self knocks stacks of pictures askew, and I am third in line.

Another assistant asks if I'm doing a selfie as well, and I chat with him like a normal, sane person who is allowed to vote. And then I get to Neil.

And I freeze tf up. As I knew would happen. I literally made a card for this occasion because of who I am as a person.

Neil: Hi Tanis, I'm Neil. (Hubs later during my scream session, "'oh really? I thought this was the line for the bathroom.'" "IF I HAD THE BRAIN FOR WIT AT THE TIME, MY LOVE.") Me: presents pic to sign and card of panic I'm nervous. Him: You're fine, Tanis. Me: I also have a picture with you tomorrow. Him: Good, I'll see you then. Me: Hopefully by then I'll be more able to talk. Him: I think you'll find you're talking now, you're just being too hard on yourself.

I flee and send a series of panicked missives to friends and spouse:

I order dreadful Chinese takeout (funfact, not a single delivery place remembered my drinks, so ya girl was running on bad hotel coffee and lukewarm tap water this weekend) and pray that I have done my worst. I was going to go to the Voltaire concert there, but alas my social battery is dead, my feet hurt, my pride is bleeding out, and I'm just staying in for the night.

(Funnily enough Friday he's going to be like an hour away from us, so I tell hubs to get tickets so we can both go.) Next day is surprisingly fine, some panels, absolutely no author's signings I could go to, so I schlepped a bunch of books around for 3 days for no reason. I eat overpriced hotel buffet brunch in the place the photos are supposed to be. I decide to find Voltaire's booth, since apparently we're going to see him soon, and have a normal, human conversation.

I do a commerce and have a CD, bid him farewell and go downstairs to wait for my picture for the next hour and a half because I'm broken as a person.

My beta wrote me a cheat sheet and husband wrote the single sweetest thing anyone has ever written in case I got to talk to Neil again.

Contrary to the lines everywhere else, this one moves fast. So fast. Too fast. I am flung at Neil like a gazelle and take the second worst photo with a celebrity I have ever had (first goes to a picture with Joel from MST3k because I'm wearing a bright neon yellow volunteer shirt, and with my complexion, I look like I have a disease). I go back to my hotel feeling like a bedraggled potato and take a selfie just to prove that I do have human features still (remarkable because I do not take selfies, as a rule).

The next day is the last day of the con, and I only have one goal since I missed it Friday because American Airlines sucks balls: I will go to the BG3 panel. I leave the hotel hilariously early, and am dropped off at the wrong Hyatt hotel. GPS says I can walk there in 15 minutes, and proceeds to give me the worst directions anywhere ever (example, it is 8:30, I am facing the sun. The GPS: HEAD WEST. Bruh, I'm not a girl scout, but that's objectively not correct). I run into another con-goer and follow him to the hotels, thank fucking god. I am two hours and some change early to the panel.

The line stretches outside already.

I wait on concrete to be let back into the building with a zillion other people, but the seat I get is phenomenal, literally the best seat in the house. (I do not take a picture of the people because I feel like a creep doing so. I know it's fine, but my brain is broken. Hubs: Maybe I wanted a picture. Me: YOU SHOULD HAVE COME, THEN.)

The panel is lovely, I have a magnificent time. I leave the con after one last attempt to get books signed (nada), and go back to the hotel to do laundry before my flight the next day.

I venture outside after my nap to try and get change at a CVS and maybe some laundry soap, but no dice on either. I try at a gas station, and also no. The hotel does have laundry soap, but won't take my cash, but whatever. What the fuck ever.

Minor digression: Traveling solo as a woman sucks for a variety of reasons, but one I didn't expect at my advanced unfuckable age was the sheer volume of catcalls I experienced this weekend, like more than in the last decade combined in 3 days. Just dudes on the streets and in trucks felt the need to comment on my appearance, and I'm puzzled and also not a fan.

Minor Boomer moment: Doing laundry at hotels is stupid now because I had to download a fucking laundry app. Just let me use money, or scan the QR code and have it work, ffs.

The laundry is gently wiggled damp, and I check my email. Delta: hey, check in for your flight. American Airlines: Hey check in for your flight.

I'm sorry, what?

Apparently I'm going from ATL to Charlotte on American Airlines which is news to me because I'd canceled any return trip with them days ago, and a return was supposed to be processed. I call them and the lady's like, "Oh so you need to cancel?" "I never scheduled it, so yes. And a refund." "Oh we don't give refunds, there's a credit on your account." "Yeah, I'm not flying with you again, how do I get money instead?" "Go to the site and fill out a form." "What information will I need for that?" "Your ticket number (rattles off a 72-digit long string of numbers)." Glad I asked because that number was nowhere in the email. Sometime eventually my money will return to me, but probably not the extra expense of an emergency DC hotel room, and certainly not the lost two days of fucking convention that I paid for.

Now I'm home, thank gods, in possession of an autographed piece of art, a hideous picture of myself, and 3 impossibly velcro cats who have never been loved in their lives and I am not doing this again. I did the scary things, I'm not sorry I went, but this has been the single worst traveling experience of my existence.

[enfyswanders]

Glasgow, Scotland: August 4-14, 2024

I had such plans for Glasgow and Edinburgh. I had multiple tickets to Edinburgh Fringe shows, I was going to attend a couple days of WorldCon, I bought a ticket for a bus tour of the highlands, I booked yet another high tea at a fancy place, I wanted to go to this bakery that puts swear words on their cookies, and I just wanted to explore both cities at length.

But none of that happened, because after taking a rest day following my travels on Monday, on Tuesday, August 6 I tested positive for COVID and spent the rest of my time in Scotland isolating in my hotel room. I assume I got it from the conference I spoke at the week prior, though I was very careful with masking.

So I spent 9 days feeling cruddy and isolating in my hotel room instead of seeing Scotland, which is a massive bummer.

Getting sick also necessitated my final Adventure in Doing Laundry being another pickup/delivery service, though this was a local service that was much cheaper than the one in Manchester, and they did same-day pickup and delivery, which was really nice. I'm thankful to the Rick Steves guide for recommending the Majestic Laundrette for this service.

I managed a couple brief, masked, walking/shopping excursions in Glasgow City Centre on days 7 and 8 of the infection and took a few photos. A small delight was seeing some bagpipe bands perform in the plaza next to my hotel, as part of the Piping Live! event running August 8-18.

Backing up, though, on my rest day August 5, before I got sick, I did have one adventure I'm quite pleased with.

The week prior, I hadn't eaten very well. Glastonbury has a number of excellent cafes, but they all close at 4 pm. For dinner, the options are pub food, fish & chips, takeaway Indian, and a couple expensive restaurants. So I mostly ate takeaway pizza and fish and chips all week. By the time I got to Glasgow, I wanted some good food.

In my Google Maps restaurant searches in Glasgow, I found a place called Six by Nico that was intriguing. Every six weeks, they have a new, fixed-price, six-course menu built around a theme. I booked a reservation for that night and holy crap was it amazing. Traveling solo for so long had really given me decision fatigue, and this was a great opportunity to walk into a restaurant, basically just say, "fuck me up," and be brought a bunch of food. No decisions necessary.

The menu was themed on the Amalfi Coast when I went.

Here's a better view of the courses I had:

Course 1 was Parmesan Polenta. My notes: "OMG there's a mushroom party in my mouth and everyone's invited. Is it soup? Is it foam with a bunch of mushrooms in it? Who cares, I need it in my face."

Course 2: Heirloom Tomato. My notes: "So many different tomato flavors, with bits of cream and olive. Love." I also got an Amalfi Breeze cocktail, which was super refreshing. Love the charred lime garnish.

Course 3: Spaghetti Nero. My notes: "So many fun textures. Little crunchies, creamy, and soft. Nice blend of flavors though I can't taste the chili."

Course 4: Black Pollock. My notes: "Have I ever had fish this perfectly cooked? Crunchy outside, perfectly hot and tender inside. Basil sauce surprisingly subtle. Zucchini is nice too."

Course 5: Trio of Pork. My notes: "This is the first time I've heard the phrase "ham jam." [My server described it as such, though the menu calls it "pancetta jam."] Pork 1 delightfully smoky, like good bacon. Ham jam surprisingly good, somewhere between a thick chutney and crumbled sausage in texture. Bacon-wrapped sausage(?) spicy but nice. Also, I'm getting really full and glad there's only dessert left after this."

Course 6: Delizia al Limone. No, that's not a stick of butter on the plate. My (bleary with oncoming food-coma) notes: "Cold, creamy, lemony, rich white chocolate fudge(?), so refreshing after the heavy pork"

So I'm glad I had one little adventure in Glasgow before I got sick.

One other nice thing was that my day passes for WorldCon included access to their online content, which was plentiful and enjoyable. I got to see several panels on interesting topics from the comfort of my hotel room. A particular favorite was one on Shakespeare, King James, and Scottish Witch Trials. They also had a lot of queer-focused content, which I appreciated.

Some random funny things:

New burlesque name just dropped.

2. I do not like how my coronation chicken on baguette sandwich was labeled.

3. The airsick bag on IcelandAir is...something.

I flew home August 14 from Glasgow to Rekjavik to Baltimore, N95 masked the whole way (I didn't even dare eat on the plane). The descents were murder on my poor ears, but I was very glad to be home, even if I had to isolate in the guest house for a couple days before I finally tested negative.

[eliospeachie]

10 Peachy Years pt.1

⚠️DISCLAIMER⚠️

This story is heavily inspired by the book/movie called "Call Me By Your Name", I do not own the story, the character Elio, Samuel, or Anella. This story is a work of inspiration, using the script as inspiration.

Part 2 is linked below

2k words

He didn’t plan to leave the country last second, no one really did. But, there Vante was, sitting in an airport with his face covered up with sunglasses, a beanie, face mask, and even a hoodie on for extra measure. He didn’t want anyone to see him, he didn’t need to be seen like this, not after what had happened. He was just lucky to be alive and to be able to get a place to stay last second.

With the summer around, a lot of people were more than willing to rent out their homes or anything at a good price. Vante didn’t want a hotel or a home, he didn’t trust himself to be alone. He didn’t think it’d be smart to do. So, he rented out a room he had seen an ad for online, one that was in a huge home not too far away from town with an orchard of peach trees in the backyard that belonged to a daily of three.

He had bought the plane tickets and the room for the whole summer an hour before he boarded the flight with nothing more than a duffel bag as his carry on shoved with last second clothes and an ipod as a carry on item. When you’re wanting to leave behind your entire life, you don’t really want to pack that much. And when you’re filthy fucking rich, you can just buy what you need when you get there.

The plane had landed early in the morning, taking some time to change out of his clothes into something more comfortable. Even though no one would suspect Vante of being there, he still kept on his face mask, though he changed his hoodie and sweatpants for a pair of shorts and flannel he bought at the airport.

He got a taxi to go to the house he would now be residing in, his eyes watching everything pass them by, a smile never leaving his lips. He was more than excited, it wasn’t every day you get a chance to live a new life and it also wasn’t every day that your new life would be in Italy. Call it ironic, but the brunette found himself to be more than lucky.

He arrived at the house not too long after the taxi had picked him up, admiring the beautiful stone as they pulled into the gravel sidewalk, an older man and woman stepping out of the house just as Vante stepped out, large smiles on both of their faces. They didn’t seem too old, maybe old enough to be his parents actually.

“Hello!” The woman cooed, stepping over to Vante and held onto his hands, placing kisses to his cheeks. “Oh darling, welcome! I’m Anella and this is my husband Samuel!”

“Hi, it’s nice to be able to meet you both.” He smiled at the greetings from Anella, turning to Samuel to shake his hand, a small feeling of nervousness in his stomach. “I know you guys have my name and all but..can you just call me V for a while? I prefer that right now.” That, and not everyone in Italy was named Vante. He didn’t want to risk hearing a fan saying his name and sounding the alarms.

Both parents didn’t mind, simply agreeing and went into small talk about the flight and drive to the home, already asking how V liked Italy even though he had only been there for an hour at most.

“Ah, Elio can help you with those bags! Here, let me call for him.” Samuel went to the front door yelling the name he spoke of only to get no response.

“Samuel, he left earlier, remember?”

“It’s alright, I can get it myself. It’s not heavy anyways.” V chuckled softly, throwing the bag over his shoulder, using a hand to brush back his dark locks. “Is Elio your son?”

“Yes, he is!” Anella smiled at the mention of her son, sighing softly as she led both V and her husband inside, V already entranced with the home and took in what details he could on the way in. “He should be home in time for lunch. Hopefully you two can become friends.”

“Oh, I hope so too.” V chuckled softly, though knowing that might not be true. V wasn’t the best with kids so he was pretty sure that he would have a hard time making friends with the boy. But he couldn’t say that to their faces. Not when he hadn’t even met the boy just yet. “Your room will be up the stairs, the last door to your left. We put some spare clothes in the closet for you to wear when you would like to.”

Elio nodded and gave a gentle thank you before he went to the room that would now be his room for the next three months. It wasn’t that big but it wasn’t small either, just big enough for a desk, bed, and the big dresser with the clothes as promised. He went to the door that was next to the dresser to find a bathroom and then another door. Out of curiosity, he opened the second door to show another bedroom. However, this one looked lived in. There were posters on the walls, books sprawled here and there. It was probably the son’s room.

V took a much needed shower but put on the clothes he had gotten at the airport, sighing to himself as he rubbed his face and went to the window, opening it up. It was nice, the air, the crispness of it. It probably smelled that much fresher with all of the trees near them.

Soon, it was lunch. The three sat at a table outside underneath string lights that weren’t lit up just yet, it probably usually was for dinner and for events. The idea sounded cute, hopefully he would be able to see it tonight.

“Where is that boy?” Anella sighed, taking some juice to pour into her cup.

“Patience, my love. Perhaps he got too caught up. Maybe he’s on his way home now or-”

“Sono qui, sono qui! Scusa, sono così in ritardo, non volevo..” A boy suddenly ran in, one who looked about V’s age. He had a head full of curly hair that had been in a shorter cut, freckles spreading across his nose and cheeks, thick eyebrows, and piercing blue eyes. He was..handsome. The boy turned to V, a small smile on his lips as he nodded his head as a little greeting, sitting down in the chair next to him, though a bit farther, shaking his hand. “Elio. Nice to meet you.”

“V.”

The lunch went on smoothly, V mainly sitting in silence as he ate except for answering small talk questions and complimenting the food as he ate. He couldn’t help but steal a few glances at Elio every so often while sharing barely any words with him. Lunch was done fairly quickly, Elio excusing himself to go back to seeing his friends, saying he’d be back for dinner.

And that’s how it went on for the next few weeks. The two boys barely exchanged words together, him mainly staying in his room, out with his friends, or somewhere that V wasn’t. But, one day he got lucky, going into the kitchen where Anella was peeling some peaches, Elio occasionally stealing a piece of the fruit, him and his mother giggling as V walked down, smiling at the two. It was cute to see a family together.

“Oh, V! Buongiorno! Come hai dormito?”

V stood there in the doorway for a second, trying to figure out what the woman meant as he shoved his hands into the pockets of his shorts, his mouth open as his brain tried to search for an answer. “Uh..”

Elio laughed a little, taking another piece of fruit from the bowl. “She asked you how you slept.”

“Oh-” V chuckled with the other two, shaking his head a little in embarrassment. “Yeah, yeah I slept pretty good. The bed actually seems to get more comfortable each night.”

Anella nodded, lightly smacking Elio’s hand when he tried to steal yet another piece, muttering something to him before turning back to glance at V, placing the mango peels onto a napkin on the side. “Were you wanting something to eat? Perhaps some juice?”

“No thank you, Mrs. Perlman. I was actually wondering if you knew where a good cafe close by would be? I want to go into town so I can maybe grab a thing or two from the shops and thought it would be nice to stop by at one.”

“I can show you one.” Elio pitched, catching both Anella and V by surprise, mainly because he didn’t expect the other to volunteer. “I can show you around the town as well. And I’m sure I can help you be your translator.” He took himself off the counter he was leaning on and walked past V, lightly patting his arm as he did. “Come on, we can use the bikes.”

So, the two took the two bikes as Elio said and rode into town. It didn’t take long, five minutes or so? The ride was quiet between the two as they went in, stopping at the cafe Elio had mentioned. He, of course, ordered for the both of them, getting them some blueberry muffins as well since they both didn’t have breakfast.

“Are you from around here?” V asked, looking up at the other sitting across from him while taking a bite of the muffin on his plate.

Elio shook his head, reaching into his pocket and took out a pack of cigarettes, placing one between his lips. “No,” he answered simply. “We used to come here during the summer. And Christmas and a uh..another holiday. But dad grew too attached to here so now we live here.”

“Christmas?” V chuckled, his eyes on the pack of cigarettes. It hadn’t been too long since he last smoked, he was trying to quit, having a cup of coffee every time he wanted one. It was kind of working, only if the coffee was black. When Elio held the pack out to him, as if asking if he wanted one, it took everything in V to shake his head with a polite no, turning his eyes towards the muffin instead.

Elio hummed, taking the lighter and lit the stick between his lips. “And Easter too. We are Jewish, English, American, Italian, French... somewhat atypical.” He laughed a little, taking a puff of the cigarette and moved it away to blow the smoke away from him.

V hummed, nodding his head a little. “I see. What do you and your family do here?”

“Mm, wait for summer to end.” Both boys shared a laugh at that, V shaking his head.

“No no, seriously. What do you do at least? Besides the waiting and hanging out with your friends all of the time?”

Elio sighed a little, his smile staying on his lips, placing the stick back between his lips as he spoke once more. “Transcribe music. Read books. Swim at the river. Go out at night.”

V nodded, tilting his head as he took a moment to look the man over. He could see that, Elio at his desk with headphones over his ears and scribbling on a piece of paper what notes he heard or laying in his bed with a book in his hands. It didn’t sound that surprising.

“Let me ask you something,” Elio chimed, making V snap out of his little daydreams of the other. “Why did you choose to come to Italy if you can’t even speak Italian?”

V couldn’t hide his little laugh of embarrassment, looking off to the side and leaned back in his seat, starting to pick at his nails. It was a little habit he had grown to do it the past few weeks, picking at his hangnails. “I needed somewhere to go last second. I wanted a bit of a summer getaway and uh..what better place than Italy?” Both of them shared a laugh once again, V taking the last bit of his muffin. “I do want to be here for a while though so I might as well learn, right?”

“Maybe I can teach you?”

[mybloodyfamousprophets]

i hope you ate on your 7 hour drive from the 6ix, islands far, truck stop the busses skip, pay twenty dollar ticket, get away for a weekend,

walk on through historic city, jacques cartier looks so pretty, our own little slice, copy of Paris, ligne orange a montmorency, blue line trains not fancy, changer snowdon go east, climb a mountain, watch sunsetz clouds burn out like the darts hitting, you spent your life hidden, found out what you’d been missing, spotlight Mount Royal eye, clubs bouncing city lights, head back downtown avoid fights, hit the Saint Laurent tonight, drinks flowing, your good times, look across the bar with starstruck eyes, that boys outfit is cuter than mine, but tonight i won’t have the time,

came here first you were just a kid, city felt magic we got snowed in, eating cheapest street poutine, those were really simple days, no boys backstabbers frauds or fakes, just a teacher that you hate, punish you alone i call that hate, you never talked back, no stand up show up for yourself, misguided alone on a bad path you fell, no good friends to lift you out of that hell, but you’re not that kid and now you’re well, different, but you saw the city and you got addicted

a few years later we drive on back, too broke for Adirondack, mom takes you off the leash to roam, and you almost bought a ticket home, but explore on your own and take in the sights, a city so close but different from mine, change your language all the time, guys smoking weed and cops don’t fine, didnt have a boy i could call mine, just 14 but you were longing, feel like you weren’t belonging, some new clothes renewed your hope but you still begged, throw me a rope, you were too serious, i’m not serious enough, you were jaded, now I’m faded off the pot, you were sippin, vodka, civics class was hot, im no different, just changed it up a notch,

icy winter, but i’m a little older now, thanks for frosh week, went with new friends, it was pretty sweet, stared at Van Gogh, moving picture on the wall, high feel the stars that circle the hall, not here with you, but i let myself enjoy it all, long line smoked meat, famous deli, and then we leave on down the street, i know my way in this city, Apple Maps try and lie to me, bus downtown busy streets, then we stayed in the room that night, drinking Whitney till the sun rise, one more shot on the count of ten, passing out in the bathroom bin, drunken mess dragged into bed, can’t remember what you said, drunk and i was feeling red, wishing i was holding… no, i can’t say his name.

racers weekend, rene levesque looks red hot, jean drapeau all blocked off, rainy days forecast still stayed hot, see these streets i walk a lot, but im here on my own shot, booked this trip to see him, city he was gonna be in, but i asked him when he’s free and he never sent that text to me, stayed with a friend we went to check out ACC, have a good drink but i prefer to smoke, so did he, i take another toke, what a joke, stayed with her but my boys at home, still, never came with me, i guess it’s good he couldn’t ruin my favourite city, running away REM faster than highway, make my great escape, or maybe one day, i walked by that jacques cartier, same spot i saw as a kid that day, teacher heard ipod in pocket headphones played, tales of scary ghosts and gays, spot where memories were made, i talk to none of them anymore, times passed years before

weekend trip you, came with your best friend, roommates kicked out by hotel [can’t name due to ongoing legal battle], wouldn’t leave them out on the streets, moved new hotel, now my friend is feeling groovy so we go to gay bars, smoothie, fruit salad in the room, beyonce or abba go and pick a tune, or some awful showtune we don’t feel glee, i only know Hamilton mcmaster university, or queen elizabeth, granted, not the monarch, burning filtered lights and my hands are up, burn my lungs and cross my heart, on the balcony and I’m singing, baby, did you even really love me?

one days time is, never enough, to catch this city from the window on a bus, metro underground rolling around, taking over every cool spot in town, meet a new guy old one got mean, can’t tell if he’s just, playing with me, headphones brown hair, see him some, here n there, want more, give me some fun!

one days time is, never enough, stayed in anjou, far from the fun, cross province drank the same time as me, we both threw up so dizzy, fireball my throat is burning, keele’d over on college street, he’s on the floor, breakup Whitney, and we called a cab at like, 10 past 3, friends lift him into bed, i tumbled into the back, seat, flashing lights passing by me, ride or die by my side, known since my home town that’s a long time, one won’t ask a girl cause he’s too shy, not my guy, i tried to hang out but he wouldn’t slide, don’t like sliding no pinball, no arcade, but tokens on me, already paid, if he wanted to entertain he would’ve answered differently, unless i took that wrongly, RAADS test score one thirty, sometimes need help socially, love to talk i’m maturing, smokes with strangers in places i do things i regret, manifest his text but i couldn’t read his name

still spent his time playing games, respond “i like you maybe”, no initiate or make time for me, maybe he just isn’t for me, or he’s too shy or I’m too boring, chasing men that don’t adore me, or even boys that just talk to me, tell me come through you know im moving, unless there’s a death or a dinner I can’t miss, rare family moments that sometimes exist, or friends from far places that make the adventure, and you can’t even send a text message, or just come around, this big campus town, stand on a rooftop and stare at the ground, the pond and the ducks a rare city scene, can’t look in your eyes ill get lost again

[bike42]

Friday September 1st

We slept from 8pm last night until about 6am this morning. I got up and did some yoga and showered before breakfast. The hotel breakfast reminded me of the hotel breakfast in Santorini - they bring a basket of pastries (including my favorite chocolate croissants), give you a choice of starter (fruit, yogurt and granola, or porridge) then a choice of 4 different egg entrees. We both had yogurt and the “Irish Breakfast” today which is two eggs, thick bacon, sausage, two different blood sausages (no, thank you), potatoes, and grilled tomato and mushrooms. We ate too much, but it was all good.

We went back to our room and slept for another two hours, then hustled to meet our tour guide for the Book of Kells and Dublin Castle tour. I’d booked this through Viatar which I’d used before - worked out well. Mostly other Americans on our tour, some from a cruise ship - stopped in Dublin for just a few hours?

Our tour guide, Antonio, was fantastic. He told us all about Trinity College, the Book of Kells, and the long library. Guides aren’t really allowed to “guide” inside, so he prepped us on what we’d be seeing and met us in the library afterwards. I’m still having a hard time wrapping my mind around a book as ancient as that - what went into it to make it, all the symbology, and the fact that it’s just that old!

After that, we walked together through the streets - such dangerous crossings, past the Molly Malone statue (Antonio was impressed that I knew of the Dubliners) to Dublin Castle, which didn’t appear to be much. We went around the side to the garden and Antonio gave us a few more facts and suggestions for other things to see and do.

We had 4pm tickets for the Guinness experience, so we popped into a coffee shop for a coffee and sandwich, and walked about 1km more to Guinness, passing many beautiful old churches and cathedrals. We were early, but we got in anyway and started our tour. We’d learned some things from Antonio earlier, and that helped Jeff win an extra glass of beer (what color is Guinness? Red). We also learned about the criteria for a perfect Guinness pour, and how to find a pub that’s been certified by Guinness (identified by a special red sign). Criteria are: 45 degree tilt, fill 3/4 full and let surge settle for 60 seconds. Should not exceed 119.5 seconds total. 12 mm foam top.

The whole tour exceeded my expectations. Guinness has long been one of my favorite beers, but the experience was well laid out from the process of how the beer is made, to the history of making the barrels, their advertising history, etc. There was a man playing a Bodhran (Celtic drum) with a bunch of extra drums. I jumped in and tried to learn and play along - tough on the wrist, but fun to try.

We’d bought the ticket for the “Stoutie” experience, which is having your face magically “printed” into the foam head. Fun, but I “drank” my head before I got a very good photo! We ended our tour on the seventh floor “Gravity Bar” with another pint each. Luckily, I had some almonds in my bag so we could mute our buzz just a bit. Quick stop at the gift shop and we were on our way.

We received a text from Connie and Jeff who will be joining us on the M&M tour in a few days, so we made a plan to meet them at Stag’s Head Pub (walked by it this afternoon and Antonio said is was good). Friday night and things were picking up, so we were lucky to snag the last table for 4! It was good to meet them ahead of time, make it easier to sort out who is who when we meet the whole group in a few days!

We left there about 8pm, and walked through the Friday night crowd back to our hotel. Exhausted after our first full day, and still a bit jet lagged.

Saturday September 2nd

If I hadn’t set an alarm this morning, we would have slept through breakfast! We went down and ate a little less this morning, then back to our room. Jeff went back to sleep again, I researched options for today and tomorrow, then did a yoga session and got ready for the day.

We headed out about 11:30am and found a warm sunny day - so far we haven’t used an umbrella since getting on the plane in Amsterdam! We walked to the river, and verified our coach (bus) pickup spot for Monday morning. We noticed commotion across the river and learned there was a “Liffey Swim” race going on. Unfortunately, we couldn’t stay to watch the swimmers arrive as we had tickets to the “Jeanie Johnston” tour and it was about to start!

I bought 1pm tickets for the Emigrant Museum, and they gave us a noon add on tour of a replica of a 1847 three masted sailing ship - living history museum on 19th century emigration. The Original ship would have been used for trading between Ireland and North America (emigrants to NA, timber back to Europe).

We had the most fantastic guide, telling us the most horrific story of the Potato Famine and “coffin ships.” I’d read enough historical fiction of emigrants crossing from Europe / UK in the 1800’s to know the voyage was gruesome and dangerous. But hearing about it while standing in a replica ship really made it come to life.

Between 1848 and 1855, the Jennie Johnston made 16 voyages to NA, average length of the journey was 47 days. The ship was licensed to carry 40

people, including crew, but the most passengers ever carried was 254! They claim she had a perfect safety record and no passenger or crew member ever died onboard, in contrast to many others known as “coffin ships.” The original ship sunk in 1858 after becoming waterlogged hauling a load of timber - but the crew was rescued by another ship.

Our guide told us the difference was the Donovan family who owned the ship.

It was referred to as a “miracle ship,” but they had better sanitation and provided food and clean water to the passengers. They also had a physician on board - he screened passengers before boarding, insisted on toilet buckets to be emptied and washed out frequently, blankets to be aired on deck everyday, and passengers were allowed on deck for 30 minutes each day. All that was unusual for those days apparently.

The cost to passengers for passage to North America was 3 pounds (2400 Euros in those days). Most couldn’t pay that as they were already poor when the Potato Blight ruined the potato crop in Ireland. Families would often send one person to get settled, who would send money for others to follow (if they were still alive and if they were healthy enough to travel). She told us of one woman who gave birth to a son onboard, they later settled in St Paul and there is a photo of him in a bar that he owned there when he was a grown man.

Our guide knew a lot, and was delicately choosing her words. She pointed out that the blight impacted potatoes all over the world, but economically, Ireland was the only place that was devastated by it. We stayed and talked with her more after the tour, with our naive questions of why didn’t they plant other crops? What we didn’t understand is that Ireland was under UK rule then and many other crops were grown, but they were all “property” of the crown and exported to England. She said different parts of Ireland were impacted differently - her family was from north of Dublin with little impact, but the west coast where we’re headed was most devastated.

It is estimated that 1.2 million people died and another 1.5 million left Ireland (population number have yet to recover) between 1845 and 1852. There is no word for “Great Famine” in Irish - their word “Gorta Mor,” means the Great Hunger.

The famine was a defining moment in the history of Ireland. The British government provided little aid and made statements that the famine was due to lacking moral character of the Irish. A vicious cycle of mass evictions led to people living in ditches and hedges. One politician had been quoted as saying “let them eat grass.” Soup kitchens were set up for about six months, but then withdrawn to “avoid dependency.” It’s not hard to see how this triggered the eventual fight for independence from the UK.

We left the ship and headed to the Irish Emigration Museum - very well done, illustrating contributions Irish descendants have had around the world in politics, the arts and history in general.

We grabbed a quick sandwich and began the 30 minute walk to the Jameson Distillery for our 3:30pm reservation. The streets were crowded with people, buses, cars and bikes so it made walking a little more difficult!

We enjoyed the Jameson tour, but they don’t actually make it at that site any longer, so it was more of a talk and tasting. We also did a “Cask draw” from a first use bourbon barrel, added 18 years (2005). It was made from a single pot still - no corn or maize, and was quite good malted barley. In the gift shop, we bought a bottle of Jameson Crested, aged in a sherry barrel from Spain - quite yummy and I thought it’d be fun to share on the M&M tour. Sine metu = without fear (Jameson motto).

We were sitting in the converted warehouse having a Jameson and ginger beer cocktail, when I realized that Guinness and Jameson apparently operated right through the time of the Great Hunger / Famine. Hmmmm? Wonder how that worked?

We’d received a text from Steve, another M&M participant that arrived in Dublin just today. He suggested a pub near his hotel so we walked back across the river and met him there, and Jeff & Connie met us as well. I had a gin & tonic (talking to a couple from Cornwall made me thirsty for gin) and a massive yummy hunk of battered fish, and some so-so “chips.” The bar was really hopping - several different music acts while we were there, made me anxious to get the musical portion of this trip going. We walked back to our hotel along the end of the Temple Bar area, know for its partying - really starting to pick up at 8pm on a Saturday night. We walked along Gaston Street with the high end shops and bought gelato along the way. People watching would be awesome tonight, but we’re exhausted and ready for sleep!

I learned Jimmy Buffett died yesterday. Makes me sad as his music had been such a big part of my life, especially in the days when I needed some “escapism” from my reality. I know that like John Prine, John Denver, Tom Petty and so many others, his music will live on. It was fun to get messages from Regina and Becky and think about what fun we had at those Alpine Valley concerts - one year we made a huge fin out of cardboard and ducktaped it to the ski rack on top of my old Saab.

Sunday September 3, 2023

We’ve fallen into a good morning routine of yoga/stretching, shower, and a hearty Irish breakfast. We had a later breakfast this morning, no need to rush into our day. I awoke with a craving for green vegetables, so I started perusing the menus of needby restaurants for tonight … ready for a break from pub food!

We went to the 11am tour at the “Little Museum of Dublin,” which was just down the street. It is an eclectic mix of stuff in an old Georgian style townhome across from St Stevens Green, a large park across the street. One of the interesting artifacts they had was a key to the park, as the park had been locked and only the wealthy neighbors had keys! Most of the staff were likely actors in training and they told amusing stories and anecdotes along with their version of the history of Ireland. We most liked the room dedicated to U2, since we’re not going to make it over to the Rock n Roll museum.

We strolled through the park - very alive with families being a warm beautiful Sunday afternoon! From there we walked down Grafton Street, window shopping and listening to buskers. It was even more crowded that it had been last night. We were on a mission to find “super glue” to repair Jeff’s shoe. We struck out a the pharmacies, then on Google I found “Mary’s Bar and Hardware,” a cute little place with a friendly bartender who suggested we try Dunnes, where we found several different types. Back to the room for some R&R before heading out again. A couple days of this sidewalk / museum strolling pace and I’m ready to get out to the countryside and do some hiking with a fast pace and normal stride!

We had a few more museums we wanted to see, but we were pretty tired, so we bought tickets to the Hop On - Hop Off bus and rode around the city being entertained by our driver Alan. It’s always a different perspective from the top of the bus, and it was a great day to be out on the top deck.

We met our travel partner, Steve, at an Italian restaurant close to our hotel for dinner. We shared a bottle of “Super Tuscan” wine and I had my fill of good vegetables - a nice break from pub food. Early night - tomorrow we travel 3-hours by bus to meet the rest of the group in Bunratty!

[kirukkals]

Winter 2022 - Germany & more!

We had been wanting a holiday, a white christmas holiday and we got one. An unexpected work-related trip to Germany, and we grabbed the chance.

December 1st, 2022.

We boarded the Turkish airlines in Dubai and landed in Zurich. This was our second time in Switzerland, and our previous trip was in 2015 with our friend's family. We had been longing to come back. We didn't cover Zurich then, so ya, same country, but new city and this time during winter ! COLD! REALLY COLD! Ok, so it is not just Switzerland again. Our agenda was completely different. Read on…

A few days earlier...

Venkat calls mid day from work to tell me he has a business meeting in Frankfurt, Germany, during the 1st week of December. And as expected, my reaction was, yeaahhh.. I'm packing up.

We had been planning Germany for the past 4 years, and somehow it kept getting delayed - visa renewal, then we booked on a Russian airline for March 2020 & covid travel ban happened. When everything opened up, we didn't expect the Ukraine war, and Russian airlines were banned over EU airspace, so our Germany trip was far-fetched. Finally, it looked like it was time.

And I have to say, we were indeed very lucky to get a schengen visa appointment on such short notice. We quickly booked our tickets to the cheapest available option, which was Zurich, readied our papers for the visa process, and prayed a lot. It was all in a matter of 7 days, and when we received the visa sticker on our passport, we could already see snow.

We planned Switzerland & Germany, maybe the Netherlands if time permits. We never thought we would end up doing 7 countries in Europe in 13 days !

We decided to use the trains only for this trip, no self driving. Just mid the same year, we did a cross country drive in the Balkans. That goes in another blog for another day. So, let me stick to these 13 days now. We got a blast of a deal on the 10 day Global train pass over Black Friday sale, which can be used for most Schengen countries.

December 1st, 2022.

Zurich, Switzerland - Country 1.

We landed around 10.15 am. in Zurich. We were welcome to a 5 degree celsius kind of weather straight from a 25 degree in Dubai. As we stepped out of the airport to the train station, we realised the 2 layer clothing that we had would not be sufficient for the days to come. We took a train to our hotel Ibis. This is a really, really expensive country, and a triple room always costs more. A few years back, we had decided no more IBIS Budget, the room is always so small and the bathrooms… omg! Not again ! It was a transparent glass door for the shower with a translucent patch exactly where needed, not an inch higher or an inch lower. Separate toilet with proper door, but no lock. That is ok, but glass door for bath, and we travel with our girl (always!) She is 12 now! So, we pulled out the bedspread and hung it along the height of the door, creating the cover we needed, the first thing that we did after landing in Switzerland !!!

Evening, we went for a stroll to Lindenhof, and it ended up to be a hike, actually. The view from the top was spectacular. Being winter, no crowds at all. It was around 8 to 10 degrees celsius. And this time, we were prepared with jackets, gloves, snow boots, and all ready to take on the winter. So we assumed.

December 2nd, 2022.

Vaduz, Liechtenstein - Country 2.

Day 2, we decided to visit one of the smallest countries in the world, Liechtenstein. From Zurich, we took a train to Sargans and from there a bus to Vaduz, about 1.5 hrs for the total trip. Vaduz is one of the most beautiful, picture perfect little towns I would say. The castle towers over the entire place. The Prince of the country still lives there (lucky him!!), so the castle is not open for tourists. We just walked around the main town area for a few hours - castle, church, shops - beautiful & calm place. Definitely one of the richest in the world. We bought the smallest magnet to identify with the size of the country. We treated ourselves to a nice cup of Srilankan chai in the evening.

Evening we headed back to Zurich, to the Rapperswil, where the Christmas Market was put up. What a contrast to the calm Vaduz, it was buzzing with activity and lights, people laughing & drinking all the way! Zurich Lake is huge, and sunset was such a beautiful sight to watch! Temperature always starts to drop drastically after 5 p.m., and all around us, people are either smoking or holding a beer mug! We were the ones drinking hot chocolate and standing in front of the fireplace for some warmth.

Overall, it was a brilliant start to a much wanted vacation.

December 3rd, 2022.

Frankfurt, Germany - Country 3.

Here we come, Germany, finally ! Took the train from Zurich, about 4 hrs. As we entered Germany, the landscape changed visibly. You may call I am biased towards Switzerland, yes, I am, but still, I didn't find any beauty in the German landscape, not just yet. Just factories, lots of them, and more crowds everywhere.

Frankfurt, especially near the main station, where we stayed, was so crowded. You can see all kinds of people, immigrants, office goers, students, all busy running around, the place is not so clean, seemingly shady street corners, such a contrast from the neighbouring Switzerland, which was so neat, posh & calm. Frankfurt is a bustling business centre. We stayed in a place called Hotel Apollo, which had a big room, decent accommodation. The best part near where we stayed was Hotel Saravana Bhavan! What a blessing! And the train station connectivity helped us move around. We spent 6 nights in this place.

Christmas Markets in Germany are definitely quite famous and rightly so. It was ten, twenty, thirty times bigger than what we saw in Zurich! It was like a whole city in itself. The old town area was lit up in the evening, and the place was crowded like a music concert party ! We had to push through every street, like how we used to do in Ranganathan street, T.nagar during Diwali times! All Chennaiits can relate to this ! We had the famous kinderpunsch drink, tried the chocolates and pastries, so many small stalls, all handmade dolls, arty stuff and all so beautiful ! We walked and walked and that was the only day we were out late in the night I guess, for a long time despite the freezing cold ! (Temperature was 4 degrees or even less)

December 4th, 2022.

Black Forest, Germany.

My great friend from TCS days, Sara, lives in Germany. We met as a family in Baden-Baden and they took us for a drive to the Black Forest area. First, to the world famous cuckoo clocks in Triberg. What an amazing collection ! All handmade, authentic & beautiful wood art, 1000+ cuckoo clocks! Cost ranges from 50 Euros to over 1000 Euros! And yes, of course, we bought one for our home and to this day, our cuckoo coos beautifully, every hour.

We then went to the Triberg waterfalls and then the lake. Such a beautiful day, the weather was perfect, still very cold, but we did cope quite well. And we also managed to find an Indian restaurant, Rangoli, to have hot food in the middle of nowhere! An entire day spent with friends in such a lovely setting, is definitely unforgettable. Thanks to Sara & Mani for that !

December 5th, 2022.

Luxembourg - Country 4.

This country is a hidden beauty amidst Germany, Belgium & France. It takes about 5 hrs one way to reach from Frankfurt. We started early, so we could spend about 5 to 6 hrs in Luxembourg. All public transport is free here, people look cheerful & wealthy, yet another rich, well developed and maintained country. We walked to the main square, Grand palace, Notre-Dame, Christmas themes all around. We just had time to go to the town center where the mini Christmas market was warming up to welcome the crowds for the evening. We didn’t really have any agenda or particular places to cover, so we relaxed to take in the beautiful scenery around us.

Trams were crowded with university students in the evening, I in fact got left behind while boarding one, didn't have any money or mobile with me, but got into the next one quickly & I knew the stop to get down. Well, my husband's plan of leaving me behind didn't really work, haha! What a lovely place anyways to be left behind!

December 6th, 2022.

Brussels, Belgium - Country 5.

We boarded the train from Frankfurt morning, about 3 hrs to Brussels. Beautiful blue skies, amazing weather, (by this time, 7 or 8 degrees was actually pleasant for us), We indulged in Belgian chocolates, a must do thing. What a huge town square, architecture was especially notable in these buildings !!! Columns & Pillars in the Grand Palace were particularly intricate. Old style European architecture was all around, and we actually like such places. We visited the chocolate factory, but really, not worth all that hype. Think of it now, maybe we visited to escape the cold outside. Cadbury chocolate factory in the UK was actually much better and fun for kids & adults.

Unlike Luxembourg, Brussels was quite crowded and a big city, too. And yes, the most famous Mannekin Pis in Brussels! The story is that a little boy saved the city from dangerous fire by pissing on it. And so, there is this bronze statue in the city center, which shows a naked little boy pissing and creating a fountain. This is being decorated all through the year, some even worship, thousands of tourists visit to take pics, we did too. And the entire city had souvenirs showcasing this Mannekin Pis. So, later in the day, we headed back to Frankfurt after a stroll in the park.

December 7th, 2022.

Frankfurt, Germany.

Oh yes, I did tell you all that Venkat had a conference, it was today ! So, here comes our Mom & Girl day out. We went to the Christmas Market again and got some little cute stuff for the upcoming dad’s birthday. We strolled by the lake side, went to Eiserner Steg, the Iron Footbridge. And what is the obsession about hanging those lovelocks in the European bridges?!! Every place we have been to, we have seen this! May all the love flourish! We were just out a few hours without our man, it actually does get boring after a while.

December 8th, 2022.

Cologne, Germany.

Day 2 of the conference, but thankfully it got over soon. We could visit Cologne, and the most popular Cathedral there. If Frankfurt was crowded, Cologne looked nothing less, we visited in the evening, and the place was lit up totally. The Cathedral with its Gothic Architecture, alongside the Rhine River and the bridge, looks majestic in the evening lights. We were basking in the glory of the train journeys by now. All trains were neat and clean, had a coffee shop and ran nearly on time. Using the rail pass was a breeze.

December 9th, 2022.

Amsterdam, Netherlands - Country 6.

If Frankfurt Hauptbahnhof is a very huge and busy train station, Amsterdam Central is equally big and very impressive. Of course, I like Switzerland trains and stations better, but Amsterdam follows closely. About 4.5 hrs from Frankfurt and we checked into Hotel Koopermoolen. The entire trip being train journeys and mostly exploring the city center by foot, we made sure all our accommodation was very near to the main station. We headed out immediately after dropping our bags, and I have to tell you, we felt the real cold from here actually. We had headed up north from Zurich. Temperature was around 4 degrees at noon! We started wearing layered clothing, woollen, 2 jackets, gloves, scarves, exposing only our eyes!

Amsterdam is known as the “Venice of the North'' and rightly so. The city center, the picturesque canals and those vibrant buildings all around, it has a definite charm. We walked to the Anne Frank house, unfortunately, didn’t know we had to book in advance, didn’t expect such a big queue there, all slots were fully booked for the next 2 days. We had to settle looking from just outside. Having read the Anne Frank Diary, it was disappointing not to visit the house, maybe some other time. And the Netherlands is definitely worth visiting more than once.

With Christmas around the corner, nightlife was extremely radiant and festive. My cousin Pavi & family live in Amsterdam. We met them for dinner, and they took us to a lovely Indian restaurant, Pind Punjabi. Food was yumm and we all needed the hot food and the warm indoors. Thank you Pavi & Karthik!

December 10th, 2022.

Zaanse Schans, Netherlands.

What is a visit to the Netherlands worth without seeing the windmills?! I have always wondered if those windmills will look really like the ones I have read in books about. The countryside, toy town look is what all those illustrations show. We went to Zaanse Schans along with our cousin's family.

What a cold, foggy morning it was ! About 1 degree, it also started snowing lightly. This place recreates the look of an 18th/19th century village. It is a residential area, though so many tourists visit all around the year, there is a sense of calm and peace. And after a few kms walk, we could see the first of the windmills, the fans of which cut through the thick fog. What a sight ! I don’t know what attracts me to those wooden mills, but true to the stories i have read, I was indeed taken back in time. The walk across the bridge on the river Zaan while it was snowing was magical. Then we saw those colourful wooden mills, all in a row, and most of them were still running. They are used for making chocolates now, house a restaurant or coffee shop and sell souvenirs. This place is a must visit for all those going to the Netherlands.

We had a train to catch at 3 pm to go to Hamburg, so had to say bye to my cousins as well as the mesmerising Zaanse Schans.

December 11th, 2022.

Hamburg, Germany.

We reached Hamburg the previous night, around 8 pm. Stayed at Hotel Novum for a night. And this hotel was actually very good, bang on the road, right opposite the station and a spacious room too. Went to Hotel Saravana Bhavan for dinner. What a blessing that we found this place nearby wherever we went on this trip. Now, the prime reason we had been planning to visit Germany for many years was actually for this - to visit the famous Hamburg Model Railroad museum. Not many are aware of this, but here is one of the largest miniature railroad museums in the world. Model railroading is a popular hobby in Europe, US & Canada, and because we follow it too, this was a must visit place on our list. To give a brief, modellers collect model trains, build a landscape for the trains to pass through, all in reduced scale. The landscape can be imagined or recreate some city or village as a miniature model.

Morning we quickly got ready and headed out to the museum. We have to book tickets in advance and book our time slots too. Definitely the place kept up to its name and fame. Various regions around the world have been recreated on a small scale. And once into that magic, one won’t realise it is a miniature world. If the Switzerland snow mountain is the theme, it includes the scenery, the train tracks all around the mountains, people hiking, all the snow games, the lights changing to show day & night set up and so on. What precise details !!! Lots to learn from every model that was there. I won’t delve more here, we spent more than half a day there, and worth every minute.

Caught an evening train to Munich, long journey, about 6 hrs. Reached our hotel, Amba, around midnight.

December 12th, 2022.

Innsbruck, Austria.

As I mentioned earlier, when we started this journey, we thought we would go to Switzerland, Germany and maybe the Netherlands. After getting the Global train pass, from Frankfurt we quickly did the neighbouring countries. Nothing planned ahead. But this last day plan of visiting Austria came all of a sudden, and we thought, why not! Was debating whether to take Munich to Innsbruck train or to take Munich to Salzburg train. And Innsbruck it was, all for the good.

It had been snowing heavily last night, and we stepped on thick snow mid day as we got out of the train. Weather was minus 9 degrees, it was freezing and sunny at the same time. The sight of snow capped mountains with the scattered clouds across the bright blue skies stays in the memory even today. Entire city center was neatly planned, roads parallel & perpendicular, all leading to the mountains. Amazing landscapes, we had a much deserving hot lunch buffet at an Indian restaurant, Masala, roamed around more till we could no longer stand the cold. We headed back to Munich later in the evening.

December 13th, 2022.

Munich, Germany.

Our last day for this trip, we had our flight in the afternoon to Dubai. In Munich, it was Marienplatz, the town centre and the architecture is known for its centuries old buildings. Lots of history to be explored, but as tourists, time flies in Europe, we always never get enough.

At the airport, we had another no boarding episode. After covid times, this is becoming quite too often, at least for us! Turkish airlines most likely overbooked passengers, they wouldn’t admit that, would they?! We thought our web check-in was complete, they just said you cannot board, please go to the ticketing office, which was right opposite. There, they requested if we are ok to take the Emirates, direct flight to Dubai instead of Turkey layover. Oh yes, that is an upgrade and definitely a bonus for us after a lovely 13-day trip. So took the ever so comfortable Emirates and landed in Dubai the same night.

More magnets were added to our fridge and more European memories !

As we look back now, it’s amazing to realise how well the Schengen states are connected. We travelled 7 countries, 3300 km, hopped on and off 36 trains, and did not feel tired. In fact, it has only left us wanting more.

[stop-pressing-e]

The Lost Swan - Chapter 24

Prev chapter | New chapter Prologue

/This was the reason why chapter 22 took so long to complete. I needed a fresh change of scene and god writing this just warms my heart because it’s such a beautiful moment for them and also Krauser being a soft man for his woman *cries*

Enjoy reading!/

“The view is beautiful, Jackie.” Natasha breathed out with awe as she continued to watch the view of the city from their hotel room. Hotels were scarcely used as pleasure during her line of work and she mostly sleeps in motels. Krauser decided they would travel to the next city for a little vacation. That would mean Iris and Clovis will have to be placed under care while they’re away and Jesse volunteered to pet watch them until they’ve returned.

It’s their second day in the city and they just returned back to their room from brunch. Yesterday they spent their time walking around the city window shopping at her insistence to familiarise themselves with their surroundings. Once in a while they would enter a store to check it out and they would end up buying something, mostly new clothes for her and books and trinkets to fill their bookcases. Krauser paid for everything despite her insistence to pay for them since he’s paying for their vacation. Despite it, he doubled down on his choice since he was paid handsomely from his recent contract and more importantly, he wanted to spoil her for once. The only thing he allowed her to pay for was his clothes when she still insisted and he threw in a couple of suits too should she want to drag him to a fancy event like an opera or a ballet show.

Krauser joined her by the window and rested his hand around her hip to hold her against his side. She pressed herself against him to absorb his warmth and inhale his smell.

“What should we do today, darling?” She asked. “The concierge has suggested quite a fine number of places to visit. We can go visit the museum today and then check out this shop we passed by yesterday. The one that sells knives.” Natasha angled her head to look at Krauser with a small smile. “I saw you stopping briefly to take a look at them. What do you think?”

His free hand cupped her chin between his forefinger and his thumb, stroking it gently. “How will you react if I tell you I’m taking you to a place that you’ll be happy about?” He drank in her moment of confusion written on her face. The way her eyebrows knitted together, her single eye squinting at him, and how her mouth parted slightly. “Did you…Are you surprising me to one of the shows playing here?” She asked, the confusion on her face shifted to glee, almost eager by the thought of it. “Did you actually get tickets? Is that why we’re here? The suit you got me to buy too?” Everytime without fail he found it cute for the way she reacted with joy by his gestures with the element of surprise. “Yup. Show starts at 4pm sharp. It’s best if we leave the hotel half an hour early. I want you to wear the white dress you got yesterday. It looks perfect for the occasion.”

Natasha was practically bouncing on her feet like a giddy little girl who was treated with sweets for a good job. “We have a few hours before the show. What should we do before I have to get ready?” “You can do something in the hotel, I’m tired.” “Really now, love? I didn’t think a supersoldier needed rest?”

He stretched his arms and his back, the sweater he’s wearing wrapped around those muscles she had been resting on. “Need to recharge after a long day. A few hours is enough before this evening.” She resisted to roll her eye while she pouted before it changed to a small grin. “Alright…Despite the time, I think I’ll head for the pool. I’m glad you bought me a bathing suit for the occasion.” It caught his attention. “Oh no, Trish. I’m not-”

“I see that caught your attention, Jackie.” The signature Cheshire grin curled on her face. “Very well, I might as well go check out the spa downstairs. The package they’re providing sounds delightful to try out.” She stood on tiptoes to reach his face and kiss his cheek. “I’ll be back in an hour or so, love. Have a good rest.” Before Natasha leaves, Krauser pinned her gently against the wall, all to give her a kiss on the lips, a passionate kind to leave a flutter in her heart. “Make that an hour without delay.” She said, giggling softly as she slipped from his grasp and made her way to the door.

He had to poke his head out of their room to make sure that she was at a good distance before he pulled out his phone, keyed in the numbers, and brought it to his ear as it rang. “Krauser here. Is everything going in plan?”

A few hours have passed for the couple. Krauser had his rest, Natasha had enjoyed her spa time, and both of them had a nice quiet lunch with room service to allow herself to get ready for the show. It was also an excuse for Krauser to suggest room service simply to watch Natasha dress herself, sometimes using the chance to get closer and help her dress. He helped her by zipping up the dress and then leaving a tender kiss on the back of her neck, over the decapitation scar, hooking the straps of her stockings to the garter belt to cup the soft flesh of her thigh near her butt, and slipped on a red velvet choker with gold chains and a single red jewel she didn’t realised he had gotten for her since she doesn’t own much jewellery. He gave no explanation to when he got the choker while he got himself ready with the black suit she purchased completed with a red tie and his signature red beret he brought along to match the red accent she has on.

All that was left for her, after finding a suitable hairstyle to wear, was time to cover up her wide side grin. Before her hand could reach for the little box holding the prosthetic, Krauser pushed it away.

“You don’t need to hide it, angel.” He spoke to her softly. “I want to see your whole face, with your scars.” She looked at the scars she has on the mirror and gently she touched the carved grin on her cheek. “Can I still wear my makeup, please?” “Of course.” He looked at his watch. “We better hurry, I’ll head down first and call a rental to drive us there.” He picked up his jacket, kissed her head, and left the room, pulling out his phone and pressed the speed dial. “We’re going to leave now. Is everything ready?”

The rental car arrived by the time Natasha reached the main hall. Looking at her appearance, he simply knew she was beautiful regardless. The white dress elevated her grace of elegance while it gave off an alluring appeal due to the length of the skirt past her knees and the silt on the right side of her leg. She had done her hair in a half updo style and gave herself a soft pink eye look with a sharp winged eyeliner in contrast with a nice shade of red lipstick that matched his tie. Simply stunning.

The driver handed something to Krauser and he made his way towards Natasha. In his arms was a bouquet consisting of purple flowers wrapped in a soft red wrapping paper and tied with twine rope. He has always brought home flowers occasionally to liven up their home for her and once in a while leaves a single flower grown from the garden at her bedside table for her to see when she wakes up. To receive a bouquet was a start.

“I’m starting to question your interior motives, Major.” Natasha hummed softly as she admired the flowers counting five types of it; lilacs, lisianthuses, sweet peas, cool water roses, and lavender. It’s a beautiful combination with their small shades of purple and their lovely smell altogether. “Or do you simply decide to be a full on romantic for once under all those hard exterior?” Her answer was a shrug of his shoulders and a smirk on his face while he opened the back door for her.

“How often do you question my choices, hmm?”

“Unless you’re hiding something from me.”

“That’s for another day, sweetheart.” He said, closing the door and went to the other side to get in, signalling their driver to drive away from their hotel. The drive to their location was silent with only music from the radio being played, Krauser glancing at Natasha once in a while to admire her appearance and Natasha looking out at the window, the bouquet, and at Krauser when she realised he was staring at her. A smile was made.

“Today is going to be a day to remember, Jackie.” She told him as she inspected the flowers again. “A day I will gladly cherish.” The bouquet was still beautiful despite her lingering thoughts of hoping it would have been orchids, lilies, and iries instead, knowing he knew they were her favourite flowers. The choice of flowers, especially for the chosen colour, has her wondering about a deeper question behind it.

Krauser took notice of her distant look.

“Is something wrong, Trish?”

“These flowers. I’ve studied about flowers for usages and I’ve read for meanings when we were building the garden, I’m starting to wonder if these are what you’re trying to convey to me.” She looked at him, hoping for the answers she’s seeking. “All of them are basically a declaration of your love to me, without needing to say a word to me. The undying love you have for me, no matter how much trouble I must have caused for you in the past.”

Those icy blue eyes glanced at something from her window and the corner of his mouth tugged slightly. “You’ll understand why when you turn around. We’re here.”

She obeyed without a second thought, hoping to see the theatre they walked by yesterday. Instead, she blinked when she noticed they’re at the wrong building. She turned to Krauser to inform him of his mistake when he got out of the car during her confusion and quickly opened the door and held out his hand for her to take. It wasn’t the theatre their driver had taken them to. It was a courthouse. Confusion really set into her head; she couldn’t comprehend what was happening even when he guided her inside.

Nikki was there to greet Natasha with a huge smile on her face. Her hair has grown out and the red hair colour was gone, returning back to her original hair colour, done up into a ponytail. She was dressed in a sky blue dress. It has been so long since she has last seen her informant in person and it made her heart sink for never contacting her after they left the safe house. “Hey Dull, it’s good seeing you doing well.”

“Nicole!” One hand cupped Nikki’s cheek and she wasn’t sure whether to kiss her cheek or her forehead. She wasn’t sure why she felt tears were nearly brimming in her eyes but she felt this sense of joy to see a familiar face after so long. “It’s been too long, I’ve honestly missed you so much.”

“I hope…If you can say the same thing to me, Miss Odile.” Denise appeared at the corner of her good eye, bowing her head towards the woman. The blank look she had bore in the past was gone and replaced with a small warm smile on her face but Natasha can see displays of anxiety and happiness in her eyes and in her expressions. The scars on her face were covered up, her hair also returning back to her original hair colour and grown out into a bob style, and she’s dressed in a suit of the same sky blue colour as Nicole. “But if you want me to leave, say those words and I’ll disappear from your life for the actions I’ve done under his command.” Denise waited for a verbal answer and it was instead a hug from her.

“Thank you.” Natasha whispered. “For helping them and saving me too.” She pulled away, looking back and forth on the two women before her. “But…How do you know where we are? Why are we here?”

Both of her informants looked at each other, then to Natasha, and smiled. Nikki stepped forward to drape a lace veil over her head, pinning it into place into her hair, and flipped it over her face. Denise fixed the veil properly and turned her around to face Krauser holding a folder in his right hand and holding out his left hand for her to take. “Tell me this is all a dream, Jack.” Natasha whispered to him as the four of them walked to the courtroom. “No, you’ve been planning this for a while. The vacation, this city-”

“Better to do it in a different state than where we’re staying.” He answered, glancing at the two informants, their witnesses, behind them; Denise standing behind Natasha and Nikki standing behind Krauser, taking their positions with the couple standing before the judge officiating their marriage. It took him two months to plan everything since he decided to make the next move for the both of them. No more did he want to lie to keep the illusion of a married couple in a city they’re living in. He wanted to make it real and official on paper and he can’t do it alone. Nikki, and admittedly Denise, were the only people he had trust in to help him with the process to get the marriage licence, where to get married, and to have the rings specifically made for them.

Krauser presented Natasha two rings; an engagement ring and a wedding ring, both black with little rubies inlaid the whole band, the engagement ring having a red diamond in the centre, and both of the rings have engravings inside. It read a specific date dating back five years ago after the text ‘Always Jackie’. He slipped them onto her ring finger, easily fitting on the wooden finger.

“I have a vow written down but it’s personal for her only.” He told the judge who simply nodded. “But I have something else. The five years I’ve known you, you’ve unintentionally changed me but you’ve helped me. You’ve saved me from the path I had chosen, you’ve opened your home to me, you’ve made me realise how much I truly care for you. No matter the challenges that have happened or what we will face, I will gladly burn the world who will dare hurt you again. I wish you to know that you have been the last dream of my soul. I, Jack Krauser, will take Natasha Odette to be my lawfully wedded wife till death tries to take us apart.”

Behind him Nikki sniffed to hold back her tears from the heartfelt vow he had made. Natasha’s lip quivered as she was also holding back her tears but it failed, allowing a few to roll down her cheeks until Denise stepped in to help dry them away before her makeup got ruined. “Sorry, I’m alright now.”

It was her turn. Krauser’s wedding ring was black with a smaller red band inlaid in it and black intricate designs over it. The inside of the ring had the same engraving of the date after the text ‘Always Trish’. She remembered the date now. It was the very day the both of them met each other on the job. A newly appointed agent and hitman against a soldier before he went rogue. Today was the said date five years from now.

“Since I left that place, I had become someone else and accepted that I'll live the life of solitude. But ever since you came into my life, you too also unintentionally changed me, allowing me to experience things I never thought to have if I continue to be alone. You’ve made me experience feelings I didn’t think I deserve again, you’ve opened up hell to save me, and I’ve chosen to put my whole trust into you when I decided to reveal myself to you, all three of them. You’ve looked at me like I was your whole universe and I cried because I always believed I was full of dead stars and broken debris. I, Natasha Odette, will take Jack Krauser to be my lawfully wedded husband till death tries to take us apart.”

“Sir, you may kiss the bride.”

The veil was pushed back to reveal her face and Krauser cupped her face between his hands. His heart was racing in his chest as Natasha looked at him with adoration in her eyes. His hands moved down to wrap around her waist and hold her up to kiss her, sealing the deal. Her arms wrapped around his neck to deepen the kiss.

“You’ve outdone yourself this time, mon cher.” Natasha whispered, grinning madly at her husband. “Such a special day I'll never forget.”

“Good, because this is better than planning a wedding.” Krauser said, leading his new wife out of the courthouse. “I prefer things to be done personal for the both of us.” Nikki was ushering them to pose at stairs in order for Denise to take another photo of them. “The show is actually tomorrow. Dinner reservations have already been made tonight under our name.”

“Mr and Mrs Krauser.” She said under her breath making her almost blush as she looked at him. He tucked his hand under her chin and placed his thumb below her bottom lip, and for the first time before her eyes, he was smiling warmly at her. “This is going to be a lovely honeymoon for us.”

Denise has taken the shot of them. Two weeks later, the photos were delivered and framed upon opening it. One rests on top of the fireplace and a few are hung on the wall. Photos that weren’t framed were in a photo album provided for them to look back, a wedding gift from her.

[umichenginabroad]

Last week in France

Monday, we had our last lecture in the morning before taking a visit to an Airbus facility in the afternoon. We got a quick presentation on Airbus and its work with satellites before we got to stand on a little observation deck and watch people at work in the clean room. It was very, very cool! I knew satellites were big, but knowing that doesn’t even compare to seeing the full size. I sadly don’t have any pictures of the clean room because they were working on a government satellite. After the visit, we went back to the school to take our exam. It was pretty stressful because we were told it would be open book, and it wasn’t. Somehow, we all passed, and they adjusted our grades so that we all passed in Paris as well, so we all successfully completed the course!

Tuesday was the last day with required attendance, so it was bittersweet - most people were leaving the next day. We did a “cultural rally” downtown, which was really just a scavenger hunt in teams in the morning. In the afternoon, we had our closing ceremony, so we all got little completion certificates and took pictures. I was a little teary-eyed, I won’t lie. To say one last goodbye, we all got dinner together and went to a boardgame bar by the hotel. We played Avalon and Catan mostly, and it was a lot of fun. However, Australian Sam was hopping on a train out that night, so it was tough saying goodbye.

Photos from the rally.

Game night and a fake birthday party we hosted for Kaitlyn, our program lead.

Wednesday morning, us UMich kids had to go listen to some PhD students talk, so everyone came down and ate an early breakfast with us. It was super emotional and very difficult to leave. It’s hard knowing how much fun I had with everyone and how good of friends they all are and that it could be years before I see most of them again, if ever. We all promised to do our best to keep in touch and plan a reunion eventually. I was so upset I didn’t listen to most of the presentations, sorry PhD students. I got too many “I’m on the train!” and “We’re at the airport!” Messages to focus. We luckily got home early enough to wish Tom, a friend from Southampton goodbye. My friend Gina, who goes to UW, thankfully (sorry Gina) got stuck in Toulouse for an extra day, so I hung out with her and Ethan all day after we got back. We got snacks and watched a few movies and chatted and ate pizza. It was a lot of fun and a good send off.

Thursday, we went to an observatory, but, again, it was super hard to make myself leave because Gina was taking the train out of Toulouse while we were gone. She was definitely my best friend on this trip, and we’re already making plans to try to see each other again. The observatory was very cool, so I am glad that I went, I just wish it was something the whole group got to do together. We did see some wild llamas while eating lunch. They just emerged from the fog, it was crazy. Then we went up to around 9700 feet in elevation and had an incredible view of the mountains. I also got very sunburned.

Llamas, Nick and I in front of the view, the view, and Nick and Ethan doing the iconic Rose and Jack pose.

Friday, at 1am, Ethan and I planned a trip to the Pyrenees to visit a castle and go hiking. I accidentally slept through saying goodbye to the guys that were leaving that day :( but I did manage to wake up in time for the trip. The trains were having some crazy deal because it was 2 hours direct travel there and the same back for TWO EURO roundtrip. Once we got there, we bought extra water (probably had about 5.5L on us altogether) and headed to the château. We spent around 3 hours there. It was huge with so many cool areas, and most of it was available to walk through! Plus the tickets were 3.50 each. From the top of the château, we saw a really cool church in the distance and decided to stop there after lunch. It was huge! It was technically two basilicas and a crypt, and it was so beautiful. There were lots of glittering mosaic works, stained glass windows, and huge stone arches. It was actually cooler than the Sacre-Coeur, I think. From there, we went on a hike that was supposedly an hour and a half and well marked. We were really taking our time because we had four hours to burn, stopping for lots of pictures. The path started poorly marked, then was very well marked, then was HORRIBLY marked. We couldn’t find the path forward and only had a little over an hour and a half to get to the train station that was down the mountain and across town, so we sprinted back the way we came (momentarily stopped by cows), and did our best to run through town, though it was a lot of uphill. Also, both of our phones died, so we had to guess our way back to the station until we hit some signs. We made it, sweaty and dirty and out of breath, with 5 minutes to spare. It was so fun and so stressful and definitely makes for a great story. I slept around 10 hours that night.

Views from the castle and the church!

The insane hike. The city in the distance was taken just before running down the mountain there. Cows (taken on my little camera because my phone died).

Saturday, we were too worn out to do anything, so we just got lunch, did some brief shopping, and watched movies. We ate dinner at our favorite restaurant in Toulouse, where a lot of us often ate together (banh mi! It was so, so good, I’d never had it before). It was honestly a little sad. At around 11:15 I said goodbye and left for the bus station. My flight was out of Paris, and the trains were all sold out, so I had to take an overnight FlixBus. I slept most of it and headed straight to the airport after I woke up. I’m glad I did because RER B was very late (what I took from the city to the airport), and check-in took forever. I’m actually writing this last blog from the airport :(

Our last dinner in France.

Overall, I’m so glad that I went on this trip. I know that I learned a lot about aerospace, which was the main goal, but more importantly, I made some lifelong friends that I will miss for every minute that we’re apart. That made saying goodbye so hard. I got to experience a lot of French culture by traveling around the country, working on my language skills and mannerisms, and helped and got helped by the people in my program. I couldn’t recommend doing a program like this enough, and I am forever grateful that I got to be a part of this experience.

Aryanna Thompson

Aerospace Engineering

Aerospace Summer Program

[chloemarievaughan]

May 22nd- Bruges

Drank some coffee in the hotel- this time we had a coffee maker in the room, how fancy 🙂 then we were off for a morning walk- it is chillier in Bruges than Ghent so far, so we dressed in our warmest clothes for the journey. We both are wearing leggings and long skirts. Found a cafe for breakfast and had a very enjoyable pancake breakfast (topped with brie - cheese and blueberry compote) with espresso. Mom had some fruit, a croissant, and a pour over coffee (rare to see in Europe, usually you just see espresso ( which I don’t mind haha). first stop of the day was the Chocostory Museum on the history of chocolate. It was definitely cheesy and at first I wasn’t sure about it… but it ended up being really cute and very worthwhile. Another audio guide, and exhibits that took us from the origination of chocolate with the Mayans and Aztecs, to the introduction of chocolate to the Spanish conquistadors, to the importance of chocolate in French royalty ( in the form of hot chocolate to drink first and then the hard form), to the industrialization of chocolate making, and rise of Belgian pralines (chocolate shell with typically hazelnut and sugar filling). there were props and illustrations, and even a live demonstration of praline making (with tasting) and a jar of unlimited chocolate samples- white, milk, and dark. Yum 🙂

With our chocolate tour, we could add on a French fry museum tour for only 5 euros! Of course calling them French fries is a bit sacrilegious in Belgium, they say “frites” or “Frieten” or maybe Belgian fries, but never French. Not as good as the Chocolate one, but some cute exhibits on the history of the Potato. Sophie Archbold would like this museum 🙂 and they gave credit to the US for inventing the potato chip haha. they did Not include a fry tasting in the tour, just a 0.40€ discount at the frituur (fry shop) at the end. Also, not enough salt on the fries in general in Belgium- though they do serve them at every meal 😂

Then we went on a canal tour in Bruges! We had bad timing and bought our tickets right after a group of like 80 children on a field trip so had to wait for a couple boats to go but sat in a beatiful spot to wait. Thought the Ghent boat tour was great, but the Bruges one topped it! Bruges is spectacular 🙂 the canals are full of little but beautiful buildings, we saw a lot of swans (the symbol of Bruges) gliding through the water, and our tour guide was very funny. At one point our boat went under the “lowest bridge in Bruges” per our guide, and he joked that they had a boat full of basketball players last week and they needed to clean the blood from their heads of the bridge after the tour. But the guide did brag that he only lost about 10% of his customers to decapitation on the low bridge 😂

after the Boat tour, we had about two hours until our brewery tour that we had Booked at 16:30. As an American, I am obviously less used to the time 16:30, but in my head, I looked at it and planned for 4:30 for the brewery tour. All of a sudden, I panicked that I read it wrong and perhaps it was actually 14:30, or 2:30, and I had missed the tour entirely. Of course, my wifi wouldn’t work and moms internet connection wouldn’t pull up our reservation, so we wandered around for a while hoping for the best! It was correctly at 4:30/16:30 🙂

Went shopping for souvenirs and chocolates and more souvenirs. We like to wander around getting a bit lost to explore new areas- though in Bruges it is hard to get lost because you can usually always see the belfry anywhere you are, but for some reason we went passed the same block of shops like 4 times during our wandering. we went to two scenic places before the brewery- the Begjinhof and the Minnewaterpark. The Minnewaterpark was a lovely park, but wouldn’t necessarily go back, pretty generic park. The Begiinhof was very cool though. It was a place where unmarried women who did not want to be nuns but agreed to live by a certain code of conduct lived, and it was a place of peace and quiet with a church and white buildings and flowers. There are apparently now nuns who live in the area as well.

Following this walk, we headed to De Halve Maan or the Half Moon Brewery! we really enjoyed the tour here though didn’t know we were in for 110 more steps during the tour, and a very steep staircase back down. The same brewery has been operating in one family for 6 generations in the same spot and for many years were the only brewery in the city limits of Bruges. Bruges is a UNESCO world heritage sight, and so new buildings cannot be tall and must match the style of the city. The brewery is quite tall with each park of the beer making process on each level of the factory, with a fabulous view of the city because it so tall. but the coolest feature of the brewery is that they have a direct beer pipeline to their bottling facility 3 km away dug under the city and just installed in the past decade!

also, the unfiltered Brugse Zot (fool of Bruges), one of the beers that is fully made on site without ever needing to leave via the pipeline, was fresh from the vat and the best beer I had in Belgium so far!

after the brewery, mom and I meant to find a dinner restaurant but instead wound up at a bar mentioned by our guide on the boat tour. It was directly across from the most photographed spot in Bruges, Rozenhoedkaai, and had a “wall of beer” with hundreds of bottles. We had a Bruges witbier and also thoroughly enjoyed that though we were in desperate need of food as it had been a really really long time since the Fries at the Frietmuseum.

popped across the canal again for dinner at a restaurant with another view of the Rozenhoedkaai, where we had a thoroughly enjoyable time, a delicious salad, fries, a cherry St Louis Kriek and a Raspberry St Louis Lambic, and possibly the worst steaks mom and I have ever had. They were cooked medium rare as requested but otherwise, not good at all 😂

I wanted to go see the Markt Square and Rozenhoedkaai light up at night, but sunset here isn’t until 9:41 pm. (Sunrise at 5:45am- were far north here!) decided that if we went straight back to the hotel at 7:45, we’d fall asleep, So we went for an another stroll by the Bruges canal. once again had a lovely time meandering, and managed to explore until 8:30 pm. Back to the hotel room to make some decaf coffee and stay awake until we can go admire Bruges at night!

And now at about 10:15pm, back to our hotel, enjoyed a quick evening stroll with some pictures of the landmarks at night! And now it’s bedtime 🙂 hopefully you enjoy about 7000 pictures of different Bruges houses along canals 😂😂 (my WiFi kept being uncooperative hence the late post)

[babyharleezy]

Surprising Urban on tour on his birthday and jack brings him out on stage for it?

surprise shawty

(urban wyatt x reader)

bloo's notes: pretty sure this is my first urbana banana fic. hope yall enjoy.

tag list: @creme-delacreme (lmk if yall wanna be apart of any tag lists, tbh forgot who even was on any of my tag lists lol)

you had been in contact with jack for a few days now. you two have been planning on surprising urban for his birthday and you were so excited. it was hard keeping this away from urb. especially when the two of you spoke everyday. he was upset that he wouldn't be spending his birthday with his girl. you never missed his birthday and he never missed yours. jack told you that the show would be in Oakland, California on his birthday. jack booked you a first class ticket to oakland without hesitation. you made a mental note to pay jack back since he insisted he buy you a first class ticket; in his words "i just wanna have some part in this".

you were getting ready to board your plane. you had to be real sneaky about it so you knew you would have to fly either when urban was sleeping or working. it was easiest flying during those times because he was constantly shooting you texts or on facetime/call with you when he wasn't doing either of those things. luckily you got in just as urban was waking up and he didn't suspect a thing. by the time you made it to your hotel, urban was fully awake and he was facetiming you within seconds. it had became the ritual when urban was gone, he would facetime when he would wake up and the two of you would be on call for as long as possible. you picked up the phone and tried your best to make it seem like you were still at home so you jumped under the covers of the bed. thank god you had the same covers at home.

"HEYYY BABYY HAPPY BIRTHDAY MY LOVE" you yelled at through the phone at your beautiful (sexy) boyfriend. "thank you baby, i miss you. i wish you were here." he replied with a sad tone. "aw baby i wish i was there too. work is super crazy tho and you're so far" you said, trying to match his sad energy. you felt bad that you were lying to him but you knew that it would be worth it in the end. "how'd you sleep baby" you asked urban. "i would've slept better with you here" urban pouted and you giggled. after about thirty minutes on the phone he still didn't suspect a thing and he had told you that he needed to get ready for the day. "alright baby, i love you, have an amazing birthday. be safe and i'll call you later tonight" you told your boyfriend. "alright baby, have fun at work. text or call when you have free time. i love you babe" urban replied.

the second you got off of the phone with urban you texted jack.

y/n: the plan is working!!!

jack: perfect! alright ima have neelam stop by ur hotel and give the back stage passes. the plan is to bring you out on stage and surprise urb. we'll make sure he's out on the stage. im so excited, he's gonna love this!

y/n: ahhh i can't wait. thank you for doing this jack, it means a lot. im gonna get some rest and then get ready for tonight

jack: i would do anything for you and urb. see ya 2nite y/n

after your conversation with jack you had passed out for a few hours and by the time you woke up it was about 4 pm and the show starts at 8. you decided to text urban and see what he was up to. you two had a casual conversation and then you told him you were going to go eat dinner. technically you would be eating dinner since it was 7 pm at home, so that wasn't a lie. you were hungry and decided to order some room service. by the time room service arrived and you finished your food it was already 5:30.

you got into the shower and got dressed for the night. you wore one of urbans favorite fits. before you knew it, it was already 7 pm and you needed to make your way to the venue. you were growing more excited as each minute passed. jack had informed you that they had bought a cake for urban and they were gonna sing to him on stage and he asked if you would be the one holding the cake and giving it to urban. of course you said yes.

you made your way inside the venue and met up with neelam who took you inside into a small green room. she told you that urban wouldn't be in this room so he wouldn't accidently ruin his own surprise. as some time went on you heard jack performing and after performing crème he stopped. from the green room you could hear "alright yall, tonight is super special..." this was your cue to get the cake. neelam lit the candles and just as jack told the crowd to start singing happy birthday, you made your way out to the crowd. urban and jack were facing the audience, standing next to each other. urban didn't even realize that there was a cake coming toward him until jack spun him around and his eyes immediately lit up when he made eye contact with you. you two had the biggest smiles on your faces.

"happy birthday urban" you told him just as he got close enough for him to hear. "thank you sweetheart" urban replied. "come on, make a wish bub" you encouraged him. he stood there smiling for a second and before he blew out the candles he said, "i got everything i ever wanted right in front of me". right after he blew out the candles, the cake was whisked out of your hands and you ran to urban and hugged him tightly. "i missed you birthday boy" you whispered into his ear. "i missed you too babygirl" urban replied. suddenly the both of you heard jack's voice booming from the speakers. "alright happy birthday urb. everyone give it up for y/n for flying in tonight and surprising urban. of course, it was my idea! im the greatest best friend ever" he yelled. you rolled your eyes and ran over to jack; grabbing the mic out of his hands, you said "y'all this was not his idea, but he did help and im grateful for him. thank you jackman for helping out buddy." you gave him a quick hug before making your way back into urban's arms.

the rest of the night you and urban were stuck to each other like glue. it was safe to say, urban had one of the best birthdays of his life.