#i hope you're doing great !!! ill get to the other messages in just a bit since i shld prooobably eat breakfast LOLOL

[hpdfag]

oh my god HII!! i’m back from my break and i’d say i’m actually feeling much better :) how have you been??

thank you for sending something! i promise that you don’t even need to but i was really happy you did even then, it just feels so nice that you put some time into it :} also SEVEN HOUR SHIFTS??? what the fuck are they doing to these poor seventeen sixteen year olds at mcdonald’s oh my god. i’m sure it’s incredibly exhausting?? i mean i don’t know how i’d go through that! but i also feel like the idea of getting “adult money” is quite nice knowing most of our lives even 50 was a lot from our parents, so there’s that. make sure to take breaks to balance that because it looks EXHAUSTING?? And with school even then…at least this year will be shorter for you from what you said i mean!! So good luck managing those hours and school. I won’t lie i’m a bit proud? i hope this doesn’t sound condescending but i just feel happy that you’re doing this step and like…growing up. It’s just something incredibly difficult and complex in my eyes and seeing someone i care about actually do it makes me feel pretty happy with all honesty! I hope you understand what i mean :} i might write another message talking about what else you’ve wrote to me that i couldn’t answer earlier! but for now, i hope you’re doing fine even with the seven hour shifts :}

- 🧶

HIHIHI WELCOME BACK its so good to see you again!!! ive been doing alright, trying to manage work and life and school all at the same time is suck a nightmare v_v;; ive ended up kinda neglecting this account which is so sad cuz my feelings havent changed that much!! im just so tired all tha time ...

and of course of course !! id feel bad not leaving something, especially since i had you on my mind! it just made sense to say something, even if it wasnt a lot haha

and YEAG. YEAHHHGGGG. theyve been fuckinf BRUTAL, ive luckily(?) been out sick the past couple of days since i ran out of my antidepressant and your body does not appreciate going cold turkey on an SSRI at all LMAOAOOAOA ... now im just waiting for the manager to get back to me about my schedule for this week since im feeling msrginally better, i could probably finish a shift in my current state with a lot of caffeine, a zofran, and some ibuprofen LOLOL

and it definitely is nice!! most of the money im making im going to be putting in a savings account for college, since my student aid situation is a lot more confusing than i was expecting it to be .. im not entirely sure how our income is going to be calculated? since we get survivorship benefits after my father passed away, and because of the way that program distributes the money, different government programs count it differently, either taking all the money as a whole and counting it as my mom's income or cutting it up into three chunks and counting it as income for each member of my family.

its all so confusing and means i cant reasonably expect to get much help from the fafsa alone, so i need to save up my own money and start applying for scholarships ASAP!! i could go to community college for the first two years, and im even already accepted at the one nearby, but i'd much rather go to the same school for my full bachelors even if it'll be more expensive.. but who knows!! we'll find out eventually.

and don't worry it doesnt sound condescending at all! im really glad you are, ive been changing so much lately and i always worry that it'll alienate the people i care about, especially everyone ive met thru here </3 and it really means a lot to know you're proud of us !!

[rosenclaws]

i just know leopold would take such good care of a sick reader…….

Remedy || Leopold Mountbatten x Reader

warnings: fluff!! leo being the cutest, love confession <33

a/n: anon you are so fucking right Leopold would be the best person to take care of you and you should say it. ALSO OMG HES SO SOFT IN THIS MOVIE I CANT TAKE ITTTTT

You were absolutely miserable. From the moment you woke up you could tell everything was wrong. Your body ached, your head hurt, nose stuffed. There's no doubt that you were sick. Well that's too bad because you couldn't afford to be sick right now.

Work had been an absolute hell hole and you had mountains of tasks on your to do list. It takes every bit of energy you have to get out of bed. You throw on whatever work clothes are closest and head to your kitchen. As the coffee brews you lay your forehead on the counter, hoping the cool marble will somehow get rid of your fever.

"Good morning!" You recognize Leopold's voice from the window. You groan in response, hoping he gets the message. You look up and see him watching you with concern.

"You look ill." He reaches to touch your forehead but you gently shove his hand away.

"I'm fine." You mumble as you pour yourself a cup of coffee. He places his hand on your forehead and shakes his head.

"You are most certainly not fine, you're hot to the touch." You sigh and place your cup on the counter, searching your drawers for wherever your medicine was.

"No I'm fine. I can't get sick right now so I'm going to down as much Dayquil as I can and go to work." Leopold reaches out and grabs your wrist.

"Darling, you are not going to work today." He says softly.

It breaks his heart to see you so ill and refusing to let yourself rest. Not on his watch. It's his duty to take care of you, whether you want it or not.

"Leo I'm-" Your cut short by a wave of lightheadedness. Your eyes widen as you stumble slightly. Leopold catches you before you can fall.

"Okay fine maybe I am sick." He smiles softly as he gently guides you back to your bedroom.

"I will phone your work, you get back into bed." Being the gentleman he is he closes the door to let you get undressed.

You quickly strip off your clothes and get back into your pajamas. Your bed has never felt more comfortable in your life. You fight the covers, not sure if you want them or if it's too hot. So you settle on half on half off. You can hear Leo in your kitchen.

How lucky can you be you think. To have someone as amazing as Leopold in your life. Your relationship with him is newer. A couple months but it's been a dream. He's sweet and kind and ridiculously handsome. You know it's new but you think you might be falling in love.

"Darling are you dressed?" He calls through the door.

"Yeah" You say weakly as you snuggle into the pillow.

The door opens and he frowns at the miserable look on your face. He has a glass of water in his hands and Tylenol in the other. You smile, hoping it wasn't too hard for him to find it.

"Everything hurts." You say with a pout. He lifts the glass of water to your lips and helps you take the pain meds. His hand cups your cheek and he leans down to kiss your forehead. He soothingly runs his hand along your arm.

"I am here for whatever you need." You close your eyes, just wanting to sleep for a little longer.

"Sleep well." You hear him say before darkness takes over.

You don't know how much time has past by the time you wake up again. You still feel sick but the sleep helped. You feel around for your lamp and turn it on, the light making you wince. A delicious smell catches your attention as you get out of bed. Wrapping a blanket around you, you slowly make your way to the kitchen. You're met with the sight of Leopold in an apron. Fresh groceries sitting on your counter as he focuses all his attention to pot on the stove.

"Smells great," Your voice cracks and you grimace, maybe you should have drank some water before trying to speak.

"Hello darling," He walks over and kisses your cheek.

Like he could read your mind he offers you a glass of water and tells you to go lay down. You don't listen however as you want to watch him cook. Leopold has always had a passion for food and he let it be known whenever he was in the kitchen. It doesn't take long for him to be done and he shoos you away to the couch.

"It's my mothers recipe," He says as he places a bowl of soup in front of you.

There's a soft look in his eyes, you don't know much about his parents, he doesn't talk about them much. You do know that they passed a long time ago.

"She loved to cook, even though we had staff she always found herself making and creating new recipes." She must be where he got his appreciation of food.

"Whenever I got sick she would make me this and it would heal me right up." He carefully feeds you a spoonful, even blowing on it for you. Your eyes widen as the delicious liquid meets your lips.

"Oh my god this is the best thing I've ever tasted." He laughs as you reach for the spoon.

"This is what food can be when you use fresh ingredients darling, not frozen TV dinners." He always got on your case about those but they're quick and easy so it's fine.

"Well if you want to cook then I'll start buying."

"Anytime."

You finish your soup quickly, already starting to feel better. You rest your head in Leopold's chest as some TV show plays in the background.

"Will you stay here tonight? Think it'll help me feel better." You ask with a whisper. He wraps his arms around you, his hands gently rubbing your shoulder.

"Of course I can." He rests his chin on the top of your head, letting the TV play as he feels you growing sleepier by the second.

"Leo can I tell you something." Your eyes are fighting sleep and his warm embrace isn't helping.

"Anything."

"I think I love you." You can feel him tense only for a moment before his heart starts to beat faster.

He smiles, a warm feeling bursting from his chest. He presses a kiss to the top of your head, gently lulling you back to sleep. You've never felt so cared for, so loved, so at peace than with him. You yawn and snuggle closer to him. He leans in close and whispers in your ear, letting his soft words bring you to sleep.

"I cannot begin to describe how much I love you my darling. Now sleep, I will be here in the morning."

[zu-is-here]

Hello there Zu, I hope you are doing well when you read this ask.

I shouldn’t put such burden on you but I can’t say my feelings to anyone I know, so I’m going to vent to you if that’s okay. Feel free to ignore this completely.

I’m not feeling very well lately, I’m sad and angry most of the time, since I was 14 I thought I might be depressed, but I’m from a small village where people with mental illness are always labelled “Crazy” so I never went to a therapist.

I’m now 22 and I’m still having depression attacks ( I don’t know what to call them other than that) from time to time, where everything seems useless and empty, where I feel very far away from everyone, even my closest family members.

There is a lot going on in my life right now, and some serious illness is going to k!ll one of my family members, and I have been taking care of them and their house for a while, all of it while still trying to take care of myself and my own family, which is very stressful and hard.

So now, I’m stuck in this depression attack for almost 2 weeks and it never lasted that long, it usually takes two or three days max.

I’m also not doing great physically, I’m losing weight so fast that all my clothes are now slipping off of me, everyone around me noticed that, and they keep telling me to take better care of my eating habits, i do eat well, but the constant thinking and the stress keep eating it’s way in me.

I wish I could end this message with the usual “ your art and comics saved me in my lowest point “ but I actually feel very sad and jealous whenever I see your or other people that I follow here art, it makes me wonder why not me? Why aren’t I the one who gets the followers and the attention? Why aren’t I draw like I used to be? Where are all my motivation go?

Anyway…

Thanks for reading this, and as I said in the beginning, you can read this and forget it, I just needed out of my chest.

Wish you all the best 🌺

Hii!╰(*´︶`*)╯

Don't worry, you're not a burden for sharing your feelings (⊃｡•́‿•̀｡)⊃ It wouldn't be right to leave your message unanswered, hopefully all our support here will make you feel a bit better.

The best option would be to consult a specialist sooner (thanks to the internet, it's possible to do it online and even make researches on your own), but first of all, you should come back to yourself.

You're doing a hard and great job by keeping taking care of your family, especially in such a state, but you still have limits that need to be replenished.

It's not only basic needs like sleep and food but also time for self care and your own interests: walks (with or without music), funny movies (with friends or alone), interesting books or comics, — anything old or new that helps you feel better.

It may be hard to focus on something since stress is hard to be ignored, but it's only in your head, and you're always the one in control, be it with others' non/verbal help or without.

Remember that bad days don't define your whole life. You can return to drawing and will do it even better than before; you will find your people, attention, and calling. Let this be your motivation for now. Please, stay determined ♡

[keekee-23]

Comfort

Y/N X Damian Priest Fluff Fanfiction

You had been feeling sick for days now. It started out with a slight sniffle that quickly turned into a fever, aching muscles and a heavy bout of coughing. You hadn’t been able to leave your bed since then, the illness sapping you of all your energy and making you feel completely drained.

Just as you were about to call your doctor, there was a knock at the door. You slowly made your way to answer it and was surprised to see your boyfriend, Damian Priest.

He was wearing a black leather jacket, white t-shirt, jeans, and had a bouquet of long-stemmed roses in one hand and a card in the other. He smiled at you and said, “Hey babe, I hope you feel better soon.”

You felt your heart swell with warmth. You were taken aback by Damian’s sweet gesture. Here he was, standing on your doorstep with an incredible get-well-soon gift. You thanked him and invited him inside. He stepped into your home and handed you the bouquet. You brought it to your nose and inhaled the delightful scent of the roses.

You set the bouquet down on the kitchen counter and opened the card. Inside, Damian had written a heartfelt message, wishing you a speedy recovery. He’d even included a few sweet encouragements and a joke about how you were “tougher than sickness.” You smiled, touched by Damian’s thoughtfulness.

You expressed your gratitude to him once more and embraced him firmly, then wondered what had brought him so far. You never imagined Damian would be here; after all, with his wrestling schedule, you knew he was a very busy man. "What are you doing here?" you asked.

"I wanted to make sure you were okay," Damian said. "You're important to me, and I don't like to see you feeling bad."

Damian leaned in and kissed you gently on the lips.

"How are you feeling?" he asked, genuine concern in his voice.

"Not great," You replied, your voice still hoarse. "I think the fever is getting a bit better, though."

"That's good," Damian said, relief evident in his voice. "What can I do to help you? Is there anything you need?"

You shook your head. "No, I don't think so," you said. "But it's nice of you to come check on me. I really appreciate it."

Damian smiled and squeezed your hand gently.

"I'm always here for you," he said.

You smiled back. You knew he meant it. He had always been there for you, ever since you both first met a few months ago. He had been your rock, your strength, your confidante. You were so lucky to have him in your life.

He leaned in and kissed you again, his lips warm and comforting.

"Let me get you some medicine," he said. "You need to get better."

You nodded. You were too tired to argue, and you knew he was right.

Damian stood up and went into the bathroom, where he quickly found some ibuprofen and some cold medicine. He poured a glass of water and brought it back to you, along with the medication.

"Here you go," he said, handing you the glass and the pills.

You thanked him and took the pills, downing them quickly with the glass of water. You felt slightly better already.

"I'm going to take care of you," Damian said softly, his voice full of love and compassion.

For the next few hours, Damian stayed with you, taking care of you, and making sure you were comfortable. He was so sweet and loving, you could never ask for a better boyfriend.

When he finally left for the night, you felt a little sad. You were so used to having him around that you had almost forgotten what it was like to be sick and alone. But you also felt a sense of warmth and gratitude that he had gone out of his way to take care of you while you were feeling so terrible.

The next morning, you woke up feeling much better. You were still a little tired and your throat was still a little scratchy, but you were definitely feeling better.

You got up and went to take a shower, and when you came out, Damian was waiting for you in the living room. He had brought you breakfast — a cup of coffee, pancakes, and bacon.

“You didn’t have to do that,” you said, laughing.

“I wanted to,” Damian said, smiling.

You were touched. You couldn’t believe how wonderful Damian was being. You hugged him tightly and kissed him.

“Thank you,” you said. “I love you.”

“I love you too baby,” Damian said, smiling.

He stayed for a few more hours, taking care of you until you were completely well. By the time he left, you felt like a new person. You had never felt so loved and cared for, and it filled you with joy.

You had never felt so grateful to have such a wonderful boyfriend. You were so lucky to have him, and you knew it.

[gay-otlc]

(no sure if my previous message got sent so i’ll just retype a shorter version here)

Hey, I saw that you hid/deleted my comments and blocked me, so I want to apologise if my arguments came as too harsh or agressive. I did not mean to hurt you and I mean you no harm. I was just really upset that agreeing with an anti sexist rhetoric caused me to be called transphobic when this is something I am completely against. Not sure you read every replies I wrote because I was also discussing with other folks in the section but I was saying that even if Terfs may use that rhetoric against trans people, we shouldn’t give it to them and allow them to reclaim it.

Your argument can be turned around by saying that on the other hand, both trans men and trans women can be victims of misogyny based on how they are perceived and can suffer from sexist violence. The bear thing is purposely exaggerated and extreme because its point is to catch attention and to be shocking. Of course it can lead to deeper conversations and reflections later on, but the priority is to point out sexism and violence against women. At the moment, men are the oppressor, since our society is patriarchal, and women are oppressed. Asking women to stop hating or fearing their oppressor will do nothing to help them stop being oppressed. I understand your sentiments and it’s great that you are fighting for trans people to not end up with that rhetoric used against them. But this was not the idea behind the original topic. Of course we can open up a discussion about this but it shouldn’t be overstepping on women’s attempts to denounce what they go through. Terfs are terrible people and will hide behind feminist arguments but we can’t let them reclaim all of these arguments and let them turn them into transphobic ideas because we would be giving them what they want by letting them become some spokesperson for feminism. Most women who agreed with the bear thing were not carrying any ill sentiment against trans people. Because that wasn’t what the topic was about. But I appreciate that you added another post and explained yourself more, and I am sorry that the discussion became a heated argument and that I got a bit too emotional.

I wish you well and hope you have a nice day.

I don't think I got your previous message (Unless you were this person? But you're a lot politer than them so I'm going to guess not)

I was also very upset at the time, which was definitely hindering my ability to have a productive conversation with you. I apologize for that.

To be clear, again, I don't think saying "bear" makes you as an individual transphobic- just that the sort of rhetoric present in the "man vs bear" discussion is very similar to the rhetoric that gets used against trans people.

I fully agree with the idea that too many women, and too many people in general, have been victims of violence from men. That it's horrible for so many people to have been traumatized in such a way that they don't feel safe around men. My problem is that this conversation frames men* as the worst possible threat. Not everyone who says "bear" feels this way, but a majority of them do

*or really, people who are presumed to be men based on appearance, because no one is going around asking strangers "excuse me, what's your gender identity?" before they decide whether or not they feel safe

even if Terfs may use that rhetoric against trans people, we shouldn’t give it to them and allow them to reclaim it

The thing is, this perception of men (or "men") as the ultimate threat isn't something we are "giving to" TERFs- it is already a foundational part of their beliefs. You can read further about some common TERF talking points here.

Your argument can be turned around by saying that on the other hand, both trans men and trans women can be victims of misogyny based on how they are perceived and can suffer from sexist violence

Yes! Absolutely! Both trans men and trans women, as well as other sorts of trans people, very much do suffer from sexist violence, and this might cause them to feel unsafe around (people they perceive to be) men just like many cis women do.

That doesn't contradict my point that trans people also suffer from anti-man rhetoric.

Of course it can lead to deeper conversations and reflections later on, but the priority is to point out sexism and violence against women.

Pointing out sexism and violence against women is absolutely an important thing! I do think it can be done without treating men/people perceived as men as inherently dangerous though.

Asking women to stop hating or fearing their oppressor will do nothing to help them stop being oppressed.

Obviously we shouldn't stop fighting misogyny because everything will be solved if women just stop hating men, or anything. But I do still want women to stop hating men. "Misandry, as I see it, can never reliably be prevented from collapsing into transphobia." (Not "misandry" as in a form of systemic oppression equivalent to misogyny, but as in the literal "hatred of men.")

Most women who agreed with the bear thing were not carrying any ill sentiment against trans people. Because that wasn’t what the topic was about

Even if the topic wasn't directly about transphobia- "man vs bear" is closely related to the belief that men/perceived as men are the worst possible danger, which is closely related to transphobia.

I don't think all women who say "bear" are transphobic, consciously or even unconsciously, or that they need to change their answer or else they hate trans people.

However, I don't think it's unreasonable to act people to reflect on their internal biases, and on how the way they perceive men may relate to transphobia.

Thank you for the chance to have a civil conversation about this, I wish you well too

[okthatsgreat]

Headcanon ask game: Mondo Owada pretty please 🛐 (its an obsession atp)

SURE ILL TRY!!!! again WE'RE REACHING UNKNOWN TERRITORY HERE so FORGIVE ME IF I FUCK UP YOUR GUY

headcanon a (realistic): it takes a WHILE for him to adjust to hopes peak academy. like a LONG while lmfao. his old high school was far less prestigious, kinda just let him off with a slap on the wrist whenever he did anything wrong, and honestly he hardly showed up to class or had to put in any work to be considered the top dog there. but jesussss hopes peak is so different. he gets in so much shit those first few months for skipping or smoking on school grounds or throwing hands until eventually it kinda hits him that oh....... i really gotta shape up or im getting kicked out this place. reputation is definitely important to him as this scary biker gang leader so he was probably already getting a lot of slack from his biker friends about attending this uppity school which definitely didnt motivate him to do all that well, but eventually mondo was like. This will shape me up for life if I graduate and also Daiya would kick my ass if I threw away this shot. genuinely he was one minor infraction away from being totally expelled so the last bit of his high school days were spent on his best behaviour LMFAO

headcanon b (may not be realistic but it is hilarious): great bike mechanic but other than that not a technology guy. definitely a bit old fashioned when it comes to emails and text messages and all that. more often than not he'll make you send a message through his gang or make you find him in person if you have a gang-related request for him, so that way he can intimidate you more easily. send him a text message and the best you're gonna get from him is a "yeah sure". this also extends to if youre friends with him because he is definitely the kind of guy who just lets you walk into his house/dorm/room literally whenever and make yourself at home lmfaoooo. just let him know its you and walk straight in

headcanon c (heart-crushing and awful, but fun to inflict on friends): its really easy to tell when he's angry but a little less easy to tell when he's sad because he kind of just shuts down on you. he's very traditional in the sense that he thinks any sort of sadness is a weakness so instead of conveying any sort of upset he goes very silent until he can eventually turn it into anger, which he considers a far more acceptable emotion to portray. for this reason he goes really really silent whenever he's racing, which is mistaken for total concentration rather than what it actually is

headcanon d (unrealistic, but i will disregard canon about it): allergic to shellfish. idk i just think its kinda funny

headcanon ask game!!

[kuri-no-tani]

JVC Post #30

Welcome to the NHK

This was one of the first anime I watched on my own, and at the time I loved it. I thought it was one of the best anime I had seen. Now, after watching it again after so many years, I still think it's pretty good, but not as good as I thought at one point. It's part of a slew of important anime that came out in 2006, which was a huge year in anime. Some other big names from that year are The Melancholy of Haruhi Suzumiya(<3), The Familiar of Zero, Death Note, Aria, and Code Geass. There were also some cool OVAs like the Hellsing Ultimate OVA and Dai Mahou Touge. Though this anime is way too pervy. I think there's a lot this series could have done if it didn't have so much perv humor (even if I get why it was included).

Satou is a pretty well written character as well. He feels like a realistic portrayal of a shut-in NEET. This is a common point that a lot of people bring up when they watch this show.

That being said, Satou is also pretty clearly mentally ill (he doesn't have schizophrenia) which is part of the depiction of hikikomori. It's easy to tell someone that you just have to go out and talk to people or whatever, but it's never that easy for that person. For someone like Satou, something that simple is an insurmountable hurdle. Though, it's not just presenting Satou's issues. It also shows you (and Satou) that everyone struggles in their own way. This is harder to see in the 4 episodes we watched but I think the way this show presents mental illness and the complex situation someone Satou is in is something worth noting.

But all of this is really slapped around by the presentation sometimes. Particularly the way it jumps around after episode 11. The anime is a lot different than the manga or light novel, which are more focused. I feel like this anime would be better if it had stuck to what it was building up in the first half of the show instead of going off on a tangent in the later half. It would have been great as a 13-14 episode anime, even if they did change a lot of it from the light novel/manga. While I love MMORPGs, we didn't need 8 episodes about it in the show.

Its hard to get everything out of this anime with just a few episodes. Some of the episodes are just stuffed with great moments. Despite a lot of it being gross and weird, not a lot of shows have this sort of presentation of otaku culture to my knowledge so it's neat to see. It makes me cringe and look away but it's neat.

What I think the main point of this series is, is to tell people who identify with Satou that no one can go it alone, and to get them to realize that people like Misaki don't exist. You can't hope that someone is gonna knock on your door and rip you out of what you're going through. You have to put in work to make progress on your own; No one can do it for you. It also uses the NHK (Nihon Hikikomori Kyoukai) as a metaphor for blaming the world around you rather than looking inward. It's easy to imagine that you're part of some conspiracy or are in your situation because somehow everything is out to get you, but that's not (usually) the case.

However, I think the "message" of the show might be kind of murky and not well defined. Even with it's realistic depiction of an otaku shut-in NEET, it doesn't say enough about it or offer anything for Satou in the end other than a bittersweet, unhealthy relationship with Misaki. People who relate heavily to Satou aren't going to come out of NHK with anything but a lasting impression of that realistic depiction and will have nothing to go off of. It's a bit disappointing.

Lastly I wanna point out a cultural reference I noticed that I hadn't before. Though we didn't watch it, you can see in episode 3 when Yamazaki hands Satou his top 10 gal-games he hands him "Toki-doki Memorian" which is an obvious reference to Tokimeki Memorial (which is a great game you should play it). Pururin is also pretty clearly inspired by Di Gi Charat's Dejiko.

[light-lanterne]

hiii!!! how are you? Hope you’re doing well!!! I have some more questions about the disease in the darkest eyes, again you don’t have to answer if u don’t want to but I’m just really fascinated by this world you’ve created like I can’t stress this enough you are so talented!! anyways onto the questions, do any of the characters know about the disease? also what’s it called ? nd what role will it play in the story ? Also do any of the characters suspect that there’s a disease or r they clueless? sorry if thats a lot of questions I’m just curious! take care of yourself and make sure to stay hydrated!!!

hello !! i'm a little tired but okei, thank you ~ hope you're doing well yourself !! :O i'm happy you enjoy the lore i made up ~ ! your message really made me smile :]

(for anyone who didn't read the first part of this, i basically gave the characters an illness as a result of their exposure to the upside down in my story, which behaves a lot like a real life chronic fungal infection)

okei, so let's start with the easy part :O the name !! i took inspiration from actual scientific nomenclature and called the fungus "dieftharmenum", which has a root in the greek term for "corrupted" (διαφθορά / dieftharméni) since i thought it'd fit.

so,,, the name for the illness would be "dieftharmenosis" :]

as for the characters,,, they do know !! in my story, owens was basically reinstated to his s2 position as head scientist in upside-down-related matters, so he's keeping track of how things are going in hawkins and of the health of everyone involved in the entire kerfuffle (part of it is him repenting for his involvement in the nightmare, part of it is him being a shady scientist still x.x )

anyway, during one of his check-ups he noticed a foreign organism in everyone's blood and identified it after a little bit, putting in the resources to understand the fungus and find an adequate treatment for the infection, which he then gave to everyone. as such, the whole party is aware of it and have continued to engage with owens (albeit reluctantly) so they can get this medication (amphotericin b, which a treatment for a lot of life-threatening fungal infections) and keep from potential sequels ~

so, for the most part, that's the only role the infection has in the story. just some general world-building and adding to owens' continued shadyness >.<

there is, however, a secondary effect this whole thing has on byler and mike in particular, which i'll put under the cut since it could be a little bit upsetting :(

tw // aids and death mentions

chronic fungal infections have a lot of systematic repercussions on a person, both from the infections themselves and from their treatment. amongst many other symptoms and consequences, they tend to have a strong effect on the immune system,,,

,,,so, at a time when aids was a very real, very lethal thing that queer people (amab individuals, in particular) had to be wary of, to already be struggling with a chronic infection that lowers one's defenses and puts them at constant risk of death would be particularly terrifying situation to be in. specially with all the misinformation that was going around, specially in a small midwest town.

so, as if aids wasn't already a death sentence during this time, byler (and mike in particular) have it fully in their mind that this infection is going to get them killed the second they have contact with other queer men because there's no way they can survive both things at once :(

so yeah, that's the role my made-up infection has on the story x.x

anywayy, sorry if that's too dark or if it got too sad ;-; i promise this whole plot-point is not going to be described in too much depth (since this is from hop's pov) and i'll try to add lots of fluff and comfort whenever i get to tackle this issue >.<

i hope this answered your questions and that you find it somewhat interesting ~ thank you for the message and for letting me ramble about this stuff !! hope you have a great day or night, and please take care of yourself ~!!

the story || masterpost

[apriilessthan3]

social anxiety online

i used to have rly bad social anxiety online and after the social anxiety talk during aksel's stream yesterday i decided to compile some things that have helped me feel more comfortable interacting with people online. also, yes this is a little bit inspired by aksel's comfort media tumblr post :p

twitch

i think the easiest way to start getting yourself out there online is by chatting during streams. you could start by only sending emotes in chat. a lot of emotes are bttv emotes so make sure you have bttv installed. there is also a bttv setting that allows you to tab emotes, so you won't have to type them out completly. usually the chat reacts to certain parts of the stream the exact same way, so you could copy the emotes you see in chat. i would sometimes even wait for other people to start sending emotes and then i would just copy them lol. it's a nice way to get yourself out there while still also being hidden in the crowd. since everyone is sending the same emotes you won't stand out.

once you feel a bit more comfortable sending emotes you could try sending some chat messages. i feel like this is easier to do when the chat is moving fast, since there is a smaller chance of standing out and getting unwanted attention from anyone really. also sending small messages like 'hi' or 'bye' to people is another way to move on from only sending emotes.

i know social anxiety also entails a lot of observing, so if this is too much for you right now that's fine! look at what other people are doing and you will get a hang of the vibe eventually. then whenever you feel comfortable you could start chatting, if you want to obviously.

twitter

i wanted to include twitter in here too, because i think that sense of community mostly happens on twitter. another reason is because twitter is a lot scarier compared to a twitch chat, in my experience at least. so i thought it might be helpful to share how i got over that anxiety on twitter.

by being on twitter, you're being a lot more vulnerable i feel like. in comparison to a twitch chat where you are all in one chat, on twitter you're kind of on your own. they're your tweets, it's your profile.. it is a lot more personal is what im trying to say. the aksually mental illness community can be a great start to find people. i personally don't go much in there, but i've seen some people posting in there regularly. by interacting with those people you can start building your own 'network' online and finding friends! follow people, like tweets and maybe even comment under people's tweets if you feel like you're able to do that. i remember being so anxious about replying to people's tweets. sometimes i even had to put my phone down after replying because it gave me so much anxiety. at the same time i think that also helped me in a way. it is ok to send a tweet, close ur phone and act like nothing even happened. this can be hard, but closing twitter after something so anxiety inducing, i think, can help you not to overthink your actions.

after a while you'll start to realize that it might not be as scary as you thought it would be. also there is a lot of sweet and kind people online. i am forever thankful to the people, who i would now call friends, in this community who accepted me with open arms. sometimes it only takes one person to be kind to you, for you to realize it is all ok.

i hope this was helpful in some kind of way. social anxiety can be so isolating. it can make it really hard to navigate your way in life, whether that is online or offline. getting yourself out there online can be the first steps to overcoming or at least lessening that anxiety, and i wish that for everyone who's also struggling with it. <3

[rainbowvolt]

I tried this once already but out of nowhere I got attacked by the overwhelming notion that my antics are pointless and that the world around me is crumbling and so I deleted the entire message and took some time to journal out my feelings in the classic rambling poetry style that I have perfected over the years. It didn't make me feel better nor did it provide any fresh prospective but I'm feeling better today so I came to the conclusion that if nothing matters then I'm going to go back to inviting just a little bit of chaos into the everyday lives of people I have never met just because at least im having fun that way. That being said, what the fuck is up gamer? I put on some sublime to write this one to bit now amazon music is playing beck (loser) but I actually really like that song so I'll allow it. Anyway I was on hinge the other day, because just like you I am chronically single, and unlike you I do care because being alone with my thoughts for too long drives me insane and to do shit like this for fun. So I'm swiping and I'm complimenting I mean just imagine me turning on the God damn charm, and I match with this one girl who I think is attractive and we're chatting it up and suddenly bam, no reason at all, I lose all interest. I just felt like it was pointless to even keep talking to her my heart just wasn't in it so I did, I stopped. I probably still could hit her up if I wanted but the truth is it's just a lot of work, relationships that is, and I don't think I have the time to dedicate someone that I want to be able to dedicate. It's weird. Life. Love. Happiness. I try to remind myself that happiness, at least the way that we see in happily ever after movies and books, doesn't really exist. The best you I can ever hope for is to be content. And I'm not sure if that's true or if that's pure unfiltered copium that I'm doling out to myself on a strict rationing schedule so I can make it through the throes of years long depressive episodes. I've considered therapy but whats a therapist going to tell me? Oh you're unhappy for literally no reason, just take these pills? I've done that ya know, the pills didn't make me happy they just made me numb to the world around me and incapable of emotions. Plus my job would kick me out onto the streets if I sought out help, I already got a waiver for it the one time and if I get back on them I'm afraid it'll be game over for my career. So I guess I'm kinda screwing the pooch here. It's always like that, coin tosses and horse races I guess. I just want to break free. I don't know if that'll solve it all, but I want the option to at least seek it out. I used to believe, genuinely, without an ounce of fucking irony that my depressive thoughts and feelings, and my borderline schizophrenic tendencies were genuine fucking shortcuts to creativity. I would sit there and really channel them into my poetry, but you know what? While some of that shit is undoubtedly the best I ever wrote, it wasn't because mental illness is some sort of magical potion, it's not because hurt and pain breeds greatness, it's because I was just being truthful I think, as raw and true as I could possibly be. And I've read some of it to people ya know, like my mom and a few friends, and they just say it's so good and I guess I appreciate their support but it's not good, it's bad ya know, i was trying to share a piece of me that i rarely let anyone see and I guess people just saw it as a piece without the deep emotional relationship that it has to my psyche, maybe I gotta specify like hey this is real shit. But ya know I've also been trying to breed a mental positivity, I try to tell myself good job and "hell yeah dude" for anything that could be considered an accomplishment. I wouldn't say it's the most effective but maybe it's doing a little something. This whole self awareness thing is kinda new to me, obviously, like I seriously lived the first 8 years of my life without a single thought, I remember like watching TV or having a conversation and it was just static upstairs.

Which is kinda funny actually cause now all I fucking do is think. Ugh. To be a frog. A mindless bug eating happy little frog. Those guys have got it made. Love frogs. A ray of sunshine in an otherwise dark and disappointing world. That and when people say bazinga. That shit is hilarious. Also, you have to say bazinga, that's the whole point of this. We've established a raport and now I'm cashing in pal, you gotta say bazinga, you owe me. And if you don't I'm reporting you to PepsiCo. They will bottle and carbonate your ass. You'll be sold worldwide. I wouldn't risk it just fucking say bazinga. I'm dialing them right now, doot doot doot look I've only got a few numbers left last chance bud

I, an autistic person who is currently wearing a flash t shirt, have been asked to say.. that word. Irony aside.. no. I'm not falling for your silly tricks, your insightful-incel Seinfeld style stand up routine, and so.. I turn it back on you. You have to say 'wubba lubba dub dub'. I'm exchanging all my favours, my coupons are going straight in to this uncomfortably shaped vending machine and my goodness something better come out. It's time to make good on your reputation, time to come forth and fulfil your destiny, to do what must be done; it's time to whip out a test tube or two to help Frankenstein some confidence into that ugly little lump of brain mass and say the damn words. Say. The damn. Words. Wubba lubba dub dub.

[papermatisse]

hi! im the owner of ajuhannierecs and i just saw your reblog dgjxkhfhk. i try my best to reblog fics i love, so i was sad i couldn't reblog it. i hope that me adding it to my post is enough even though i don't get much engagement. since i couldn't add my own commentary ill do it here!

i loved every bit of it and read it even while out and about 😅😅 could say it's akin to a book that you're unable to put down!

your writing is absolutely beautiful, and im so excited for what you might write in the future! thank you so much for sharing your work that must have taken you ages with us for free. id honestly probably pay for your works if i could lmao.

anyways, my brain is always a jumbled mess so i hope this wasn't all over the place and actually made sense. i hope you have a good day, and im sending good vibes your way <33

lots of love,

lor <3

omg 😭 thank you so much ahh. this is so sweet 🥺.

I don't really hold expectations and stuff for reblogs, I just feel appreciative whenever someone does do so! so yes I was v v v happy to see that little post like ahh someone liked my story enough to actively want to share it w others! that's so nice! thank you!

jskfjskf thank you also for liking my story so much! 😭❤️ it makes me so happy to hear that the little stories I write and share bring joy to others. and thank you for liking my writing style!!! 😭😭😭 I get so nervous I like ramble on too much or don't write as eloquently as others.

I hope you have a great day, too! thank you for the message! xoxoxoxo

[ghostreader16]

ohgods thank uu T_T @sobashahzadi

ive only joined this year too and i was rlly confused on what to do here, but yall are so nicee and i met my friends here !! (both irl and new oness) I also saw people who inspired me to keep doing what im doing and some new stufff

(the both bothered me a bit and someone tried to sell me drugs but it was funny)

@b4ll4d33r-06 (grandpaaa! ur art is very cool and i like hearing u ramble about stuff both here and irl, also thanks for being supportive of the stuff i do) @korilakkumma (meww = I love u, also the cute food) @shiresmthn (one of the coooolest and mooost creative people i know, great art and even greater person) @pseudonimations (you're account is probably dead but i love ya, buddy), @norringtonloverandappreciator (my favorite rat and spam liker, according to tumblr, you're my no.1 fan and u know what, thanks for making me wake up to a hundred notifications, but what the fudge (affectionate)), @httpsmoonberry (u probably wont see this post unless i remind u of tumblr again, but thank u for everything)

@honeycrashed (u liked my post once and helped me try to force grandpa to sleep and booooooom we're here! To a 2024 as friends!!)

@meowmeowmrowmrowm (im so sorry for being awkward and a bit too weird sometimes, u were the first person who ever messaged me who i didnt know irl :') I hope ur doing alright) @gonjie (i think i spam liked u or i liked ur bsd post, u seem rlly cool, i hope u have a happy new year and more new years to comee) @muntsthefreshkid (FELLOW ENSTARS PLAYERR, Im Nate16 btw, thanks for the gifts!!), @johannepetereric (glad u enjoy my posts!! wishing more new years to come and may this one be good to u), @k-oliveros (one day i saw i have like a lot of notifs from tumblr again and thought "it's the norrington lover again" but twas u! i was rlly surprised. ur art is rlly cool, like u :D , btw, i like the colors. i hope ur job isnt trying to break ur back and hands too much, happy new year!!). @garbage--account (u my friend, have been a wonderful experience. thanks for introducing me to the ina11 community here! u led me to meet other ppl who are just as obsessed as i am with the show, you're rlly fun!! another year of sakka-ing for us hehe (ill see myself out)), @saryuuchan (we're moots??? u are sooo cool tbh, happy new year and many more to come!!), @hessadvv (another one ive met in the ina11 community, ur funny and cool, i hope for a good year and many more to come!!) @two-aliens-in-a-suit (yooo, u seem rlly cool, i hope this year and the next years will be kind!), @juudaimes-true-form (u recently started following me so welcome to the shebang!! i hope u have fun here! AND A FELLOW POSTKNIGHT 2 PLAYER??? i have so much to u, have a good year and more good years !!), @gxlexii (thank uuu for liking my writing T_T, one of ur comments legit made my day, since i was just rambling and u called it beautiful and i just sjsjsjsj, hehe im a bit of a mess :'), i hope u have a fun this year and every year!!), @randomnumber20 (we're not moots, but u are rlly fun and funny, happy new years!!)

@ellierenae (one of the first i followed here. and i never expected for u to follow me back tbh T_T. i was in disbelief the whole time, it was like getting followed back by a celebrity cause you're rlly cool and i admire ur works, happy new year!! may u be blessed with motivation and inspiration!!), @deanwax (a fellow writer, i like ur works a lot!! may this year bless u and i hope life gets kinder!) @athensoddcollections (almost same thing with ellie, but i didnt know u at first then u followed me and holy cow, u are rlly cool. im following some of ur works, and u inspire me to arrange my own a little bit and make moodboards, they seem rlly fun :D. i hope this year blesses u with inspiration and motivation too!!), @africanmorning (one of the ones who inspire me most here, what u said about looking forward to my works rlly boosted my motivation meters, i look forward to ur works too ! I hope we both keep doing what we love and make the best of it, happy new years to come!!), @bimyself06 (u come by every now and then, but it was nice to meet u, fellow writer! may we be abundant in motivation and inspiration this year and more years next!!)

lastly, @sobashahzadi, (yeah you're part of this, u are rlly funny, i hope we interact more this year, and read slower next time T_T, thanks for the tag!)

I hope we see/ interact with each other more this year !! and for more to come, cheers!

2023 is coming to an end so this is my annual I love my online friends so fucking much you wouldn't believe me if I told you post.

[wereonlydollparts]

Hey hey!! 🎁

It's your fairy God santa here! I dont really know what to say so let's just do a little question round so I can find out a bit more about you 🩷🤍

Are there any musicians you are currently obsessed with? (Feel free to nerd out about them!!)

Are there any concerts or festivals you're looking forward to?

Any other recent obssesions? (e.g. games, movies, books, ...)

Got all presents for the holidays? (in case you celebrate)

Anyway I'm a bit tired so this might not be the best first santa impression. But once I get to know ya a bit ill make sure to spice it up!

Hop you have. a lovely day/night! 🩷🤍

(Please excuse any spelling/grammar mistakes)

- Your fairy God santa 🎅✨️

Ahhhhhh ok wait that is the sweetest message ever?🥺💕

Thank you so so much for taking your time to write me this message~♡

I hope you had a great start into December so far×

And in regards to your questions...

My biggest love when it comes to music had for the past like 17 years been Kurt Cobain. I feel like it's an unhealthy obsession, but considering I'm a smoker he isn't necessarily the unhealthiest habit of mine. In regards to grunge i also love Layne Staley! What can I say... im a sucker for blue eyes, dirty blond hair and an aura of sadness.

And besides these two I ofc need the British answer to grunge and I can't express how much this britpop revival actually means to me. For years the running joke in my friend group was that all the artists/bands I like are either broken up, dead or dying

If i had a nickel for everytime I bought tickets to a show only for the artist to die before the show; I'd have two nickels. Which isn't a lot but it's weird that it happened twice.

Anyway! Back to fun things! I can't believe Oasis are back and just the british indie revival in general ahhh

Besides the grunge guys I've also had a huge crush on Liam Gallagher and Damon Albarn since I was a teen as well (something about sad blue eyes yadayada)...

But perfect to answer the upcoming concert question! Technically the next concerts I'm going to are from local bands~ me and my friends have a group where we occasionally organize shows. The next one will be with some local Sludge, Doom and Post Metal bands so that's coming up. Other than that... a 2 day punk festival next weekend (with the same group but not organizing). And the first/next one i look super duper forward to are The Libertines~♡ in early 2025.

And man in regards to all the shows in 2025... I'm broke but I'm so happy hhaha

And for the last points speed round!

I'm Journaling and painting a lot, dusted off my keyboard and put new strings on my guitar! (I will as always just stick to playing bass i guess), organizing/planning my best friends Bachelorette party, cuddling the cats and my bf, playing switch and falling asleep after 5 minutes, waiting to hear back for a cool job at a TV station, law exams and procrastinating law stuff (i have a law degree and am currently working on my other bar and a master in criminal sciences so lawschool and Kurt Cobain have been the biggest constant for the past 9 years lol)

AND LAST BUT NOT LEAST! Baking cookies with my mom~

Ahhhh ok well now it's your turn!😤💕

Excuse the word vomit

[choccorin]

HIHIHI MIRO IM ALIVE AGAIN HIHIHIHIHIGIO KAMUSTA MGA KAYBIGAN 😋😋

i hope youre doing okay pookei ☹️☹️ i know how it feels to not have any close friends irl because im kinda going through that rn !! my old close friends arent really that close w me either and i cant tell them anything actually going on in my life rn, whether or not if its good or bad.

for your classmates i also kinda went through it too but it was more of a bullying scenario </3 it was like ermermerm 2 years ago?? a year ago?? I DONT KNWO BUT naging selos yung mga classmates ko kasi nakukuha ko lahat ng gusto ko. like sorry my parents give me what i want?? i dont force them to i just say i want smth and they give it AND IM AN ONLY CHILD AS WELL? i didnt even flex it to them or anything i genuinely just said “oh my parents got ____ for me!!” and suddenly everyone hated me?? long story short they had a whole groupchat ab hating me and stuff which led to me finding out yadafadda my dad told the principal it got sorted out eventually (it took like TWO MONTHS BC THEY WERENT TAKING US SERIOUSLY) and i just moved schools bc i was planning to way before the situation happened. but genuinely i get what youre going through and hope that your classmates stop w that, you didnt even do anything wrong ☹️ I ALSO FEEL LIKE MY SEATMATE RN IN ONE OF MY CLASSES IS GETTING SICK OF ME. I SWEAR SHE DOES BC SHE KEEPS LOOKING AT ME DIRTY LIKE WHAT DID I DOOOO but we are twinning its okay we will get through this together high five 🙌 HELP

its okay im sure that with christmas/winter break coming up (I THINK I MEAN I HOPE U HAVE A BREAK SOON) it will be okay!! being judged genuinely sucks and no one should go through it, especially you ☹️ if anything THEY should be judged bc they are suckie wuckies and fakie wakies !! ppl are just really mean these days and idk why </3 TRY TO IGNORE THEIR STARES AND KNOW YOURE NOT DOING ANYTHING WRONG itll end soon i promise

i hope youre feeling better and having a great day rn and know that everyone loves u here and if anything ill use my octopus powers to become the kraken and make all your classmates stop staring and judging you for literally no reason. ill make them sink into the ocean dw 😈🙏 ILYILYILY TAKE CARE OF YOURSELF 🫶🫶

- 🐙

octo anon hi hi hiii !!! wojeuejeh same same !! the only time we talk is when they message me first :'3 they're also reallyyyy busy so the chances of them replying back is low </3

that's such a low reason to hate on someone .. they hate seeing other people be happy ! they were just jealous of you lol i'm glad it got sorted out though !! i hope your old school takes things like that seriously bcus it can lead to even more conflict if they don't ..

my seatmate doesn't give me mean stares or anything but she keeps turning away from me and everytime i talk to her she seems so uninterested :'3 we really are twins, octo anon 🥹

sa december twenty pa christmas break namin </3 just found that out today sigh, i think may year end party kami pero hindi na lang siguro ako a-attend bcus i'm not even close with my classmates and also, 80% sure ako na hindi ako mage-enjoy </3

i do feel a bit better now ! ( only when i don't see them ), i hope you're having a great day too bff <33 i'll borrow your octo powers when i need it >:] take care of yourself too and always be safe, love ya very much, octo anon !! 🫶🫶🐙🐙

[writing-for-me-at-this-point]

Found You | Danny “Jed Olsen” Johnson | Ghostface, Dead By Daylight

Sum. Jed Olsen watches as you seemingly fall from sanity, watching in amusement as you attempt to run from the killer. You have no choice but to attempt to save yourself, but as you lose hope, you realize that in the end, you have no choice.

Warnings. paranoia mentions, cursing, intimacy with a killer(?)

Word Count. 2127 words

Reader. fem!reader

A.N. i haven’t actually written anything in almost a year so pls be nice yall :’) i tried my best and ill have more things coming out soon

There's something in the way Jed keeps his eye on you, that leaves you feeling odd, feeling… pinned.

i.

His gaze is friendly, it's warm, and empty. The way his pupils seem to see a bit too large, lulling the naïve or those under the social contract into a mutual agreement of silence, and leaving you unable to rip his gaze from the back of your head. You felt like prey, being stalked, hunted.

But Jed is just so great.

He's an amazing writer, brings in hundreds of thousands of reads, and makes meaningful connections for his career. He’s got a great sense of humor. He’s good-looking. He’s a great conversationalist. He puts on a great show.

A show.

Jed Olsen is a liar, an obsessive man.

You feel his eyes on your body as you stand in your coworkers office, in a small group of four, chattering away about deadlines and word choice, propaganda, and anything else to do with your friends' writings and stories ready to be sent in and revised. You only half-listen, your cheeks felt like someone lit a match to them as your body screamed in fear, begging you to leave the room with walls of glass, to get his gaze off your body.

You excuse yourself, and walk to your own office, the hunt is on, and while you feel the eyes fleeting from your body, the sensation of being prey never leaves. You’re clocking out early. That's it. You’ll work from the safety of your home. Away from the deep coffee eyes that can’t remove themselves from you. You shove your shit into the small backpack you have, hurrying as you send a message to your boss about needing to take some time off, and how you’ll be working from home. The stress seems to calm as you're ready to leave, calming as you weave through the other offices and wait for the elevator to come up, the feeling of eyes on you go.

Your heartbeat suddenly picks up as the door opens, filling your ears, and you hold your breath. Your name is called by the devil himself as you walk in, a hand on the doors, his figure taking up the entirety of the entrance. It’s ominous, how large he is, with such a nice face. A wolf in sheep’s skin.

“Hey there, you seem a little tense.” Jed smiles, before standing in front of the buttons, hitting P1 before asking you for your floor.

“The lobby, please.” You keep it short. 

“Oh? Leaving early? I hope you're feeling well.” His smile doesn’t reach his eyes, so he does it manually, like an AI attempting to mimic emotion. You don’t like this, being so close, it's suffocating. The elevator is only so big, the air is thick with tension, and his gaze is eating you up as it flickers up and down your figure.

“Yeah, I’m okay. Heading out of town for a couple days.” You lie.

“Sounds exciting. Are you leaving with anyone?” He’s expectant.

“My boyfriend. We’re visiting his mother for a celebration.” You lie, again.

“Boyfriend? Lucky man. Hope you have fun.” His smile is a bit strained, and his eyes are narrowed, jaw tightening at the word boyfriend.

The elevator opens to the lobby, and you're thankful to take the train home, something public. Where the safety of the herd keeps you safe, the social contract comes to mind, and you sigh with a real smile on your face this time.

“Yup. Well, thanks for the talk, see you around, Jed.” You step out quickly, and the doors start to close, his body moving to the center of the elevator, his eyes still on you as you turn to face him again.

The tension leaves as the door closes more, the air thinning, but the way his face rests sends a chill down your spine, and his eyes speak a thousand words. You know better than to speak out loud, to complain about him, to ask for help. 

Running is your only option.

But that look, the obsessive one, speaks to you as you watch the doors close.

I know you’re lying to me.

Your heart leaps from your chest, and you berate yourself mentally as you dissect every part of that conversation, that interaction. Why didn't you just ignore him? Just keep it simple? Why did you lie? Fuck, you should’ve taken the stairs, the next elevator. Do you not go home? Spend the night in a hotel? You have the funds, but is your paranoia getting the best of you? Or is this the beginning of something you know will haunt you? 

Fuck it. It seems to be your motto of the day. You pull up the hotels near the innermost part of the city, something nice, expensive, and good security. Your mind has been running all day, your survival is on the line, and you can’t even remember the morning you spent in your own apartment. Your memory is shot, and Jed Olsen is running around your mind and something about his fucking eyes-

Cold. Primal. Yearning, even.

No, don't think like that. This isn’t a time to look into things, especially since your emotions are running so high, your heart is racing and you feel like throwing up at certain points of your journey. 

But Jed-

Whatever that thing is, it’s not Jed. Jed is a façade. A fake. A personality. You can tell. From the way, it takes a moment, a split second, for him to answer his own name. The way he reverts to someone else when he's alone, calm, or thinks he's not being watched. Jed only comes out when he's interacting with people. When he wants something. To be liked.

To be normal.

“Are you checking in?” You snap back to reality, and suddenly your wallet is in your hand and you're speaking with the concierge, he’s looking expectantly. 

“Ah, yeah. I made a reservation? Under, shit, let me get my personal card.” You muttered, telling him your name and how you’ll only take a quick second to fish out your card, sighing in relief when the red plastic is free and between your fingers.

“Alrighty. And the room is a King Bed, skyline, and room service? Anything else you’d like to add or change?” He smiles, and your mind blanks once again, and you could only smile and shake your head before accepting the keycard.

The lobby is beautiful, golden and marble, open, and calm. It makes you feel revered and elegant but on your toes. Like a show is to be put on, but you decide to make your way to the elevator, and your body starts to relax, and you think that your days off will give you some peace.

Peace. Calm. Your head is spinning. Your body feels heavy as the adrenaline leaves your body. The cold wall of the inside of the elevator is welcoming, and the doors start to close, and you feel your body chill immeasurably.

Walking through the large, glass doors, is the thing you’re trying to escape.

How… how did he… find… me…?

Jed Olsen only smiles as he looks around, and spots you, before stopping to give you a small wave.

Your heart stops as you realize.

He’s smiling for real this time. At you. For you.

ii.

And you couldn’t help but melt.

The skyline view absorbs your attention, the door of your room is locked, your extra lock that is hooked around the deadbolt makes you feel something. But you couldn’t say it was safe. Your mind is empty as the same question runs through your mind over, and over, and over again.

How did he find me?

Me? How? Why?

Find me? How? How’d he… do that.

The sun starts to set, and the warmest colors fall behind the horizon as the Golden Hour soaks into the room, giving your body much needed warmth that gives you the semblance of comfort.

But you remind yourself this is a waiting game.

Do you cry? Should you cry? Will it make you feel better that you can’t escape the being that is him? 

Helplessness settles in, and your body falls into itself as the weight of your situation crashes onto you, laying down on your bed and letting a long breath escape your mouth. A few silent tears manage to escape, and your numbness only grows as you hear a card slide from the other side of the door, a small ping signaling the unlocking, and footsteps coming in slowly as it is locked behind Jed.

You hear muffled breathing, and don't bother to move, your fatigue and hopelessness crushing your body further into the mattress. The footsteps started again, heavy, confident, and in stride with confidence. 

“Hello, darlin’, I know you’re not sleepin’ there.” The voice is smooth, but doesn't sound quite right, and it's quite clear that a voice changer is being used.

A voice modulator.

Just like Ghostface was known to use.

Muffled breathing.

It was blocked by a mask.

You couldn’t help but let a loud laugh out. It was short. Loud. Obnoxious. And you couldn’t help but keep laughing. Your small giggles slowly turned into cackling as it became hard to breathe, your cheeks aching and your stomach started to cramp from the pain as your lungs burned.

You only heard a soft sigh, before the killer moved, watching as you rolled over on your back on the bed before he slid onto the mattress next to you. He’s sitting up, pillows against the headboard cushioning his back as he waited, knife sheathed in its holder as he looked straight ahead.

His eyes watched you intently, through the mask in his peripheral, taking a deep breath as he watched you slowly start to calm down.

“Hehe, wow.” You prolong your fake exclamation of surprise.

“I never would’ve thought… Jed Olsen… hehe, I really was naïve. Let my paranoia get in the way.” You spoke breathlessly, exciting the killer ever so slightly, fingers twitching at the sound of his name. His breathing is heavy, and you noticed the small signs, but you couldn’t care for the danger that lay next to you in the bed.

“Jed… why me?” You asked, calming down after a few moments, hands on your stomach as you lay flat on your back. He slowly turns his head in your direction, looks down, and tilts his head. A gloved hand moves slowly, from your wrist up your arm, and his body turns; he switches arms and leans in his left side, his right arm coming up to push your face towards his mask.

You only hear deep breathing again.

And ironically, you’re not scared. You can’t even feel your heartbeat, and you’re lightheaded, unable to think as you simply watch the Ghostface move slowly as he touches you. It was tender, curious, and predatory.

“Danny.” He’s curt.

“Danny? What happened to Jed?” You asked quietly, voice barely above a whisper, peering into the inky darkness of his mask.

“Jed isn’t real, darlin’” He’s slightly forceful in his speech, and you only nod, his hand cupping your face as you start to move.

“What is it you want from me then, Danny?” You asked, and his head tilted again, before he moved to slowly climb on top of you, knees on each side of your hips as his hands sunk into the area around your shoulders, barely touching you while the mask moved closer to your face.

“Do you really wanna know?” He’s musing, his breath is shaky, and you can only seem to hold your own.

If he wanted you dead, he would’ve done it, right when he walked into the room.

Ghostface liked to play with his prey, but not like this.

“Yeah…tell me, Danny.” Your voice is soft. He lets out a soft groan as he listens to his name slip off your tongue, not his fake one, but his real name- years since he’s been called Danny.

“Let’s keep this short then…” He trailed off, moving to sit on your pelvis, keeping most of his weight on his own legs that pinned your hips tightly under him. He chuckles just a bit, and something lifts in your head, still numb, but more interested.

“I just can’t seem to get you off my mind, and I really can’t bring myself to kill you.” He sighs.

“And since I can’t kill you,” He breathes deeply, bringing a hand to the mask, slowly pulling it from his face, his hood staying in place as the darkness of his eyes swallows you whole, a horrifying glee filling his face.

“I’ll just have to keep you, all to myself.”

[pjsk-writin]

can i kindly request toya, akito and rui with an s/o that is a graphic designer(????) with all the time in their hands, and so they make nearly all of the 2DMV’s that each group have instead of getting an actual job just so that they can stay snug at home?? they never rest tho, so the boys have trick them into getting a good nights sleep, and guess what, it works!! 😋😋

this just came up in my head right now so i dashed over here to request this! i dont mind if you add tsukasa at all either, you can do whatever you want <33

have a great day!

AWW THIS IS CUTE....as someone who does animations and stays up really late to finish them this request is so me fr. but ill do all the guys, i hope you have a great day too!! <3

♡ GRAPHIC DESIGNER - Toya Aoyagi, Akito Shinonome, Rui Kamishiro and Tsukasa Tenma x Reader

Toya:

Toya is definitely impressed by your skills, I mean, the MVs always turn out amazing-

He thinks it's kind of funny whenever he comes home and you're just snug under some blankets, working away on an animation

Of course, he's concerned about your wellbeing, sending you messages every other hour to make sure you're taking care of yourself

He's even more concerned by your apparent lack of care towards resting. You need to rest, seriously...

"...Hey babe." "Hm?" "I'll read you that one story you like if you take a nap." Cue you flopping into your blankets-

He refuses to let you work on anything until you rest. He does end up reading to you though, and kisses your forehead once you're asleep <3

Akito:

Akito is definitely amazed by your skills! He just finds it funny that he's surrounded by two stubborn artists-

He knows you prefer to be snug at home, but he at the very least wants you to go outside and do something

This leads to him taking you out to Vivid Street often. It helps to hear the music live, because then you get to have more ideas for animations!

Speaking of animations, he respects your passion, he always has! But, he knows you've crossed a line when he catches you sleeping on your drawing device-

"Okay, that's it." "What do you mean?-" "I'm not taking you to see our practices until you get some damn rest."

Whether or not you comply at first, he will quite literally hold you down so that you take a nap. At the very least, you get to sleep in his arms!

Rui:

Rui LOVES watching you make the MVs, and gives you pointers and suggestions every now and then

Also finds it amusing how much you prefer to be snug at home, he knows that he can be the same way when it comes to robotics

Speaking of robotics, he likes to bring his kits whenever he hangs out with you, and you two just sit there, lost in your own worlds

He's all too aware of how easy it is to lose yourself in what you're making and skip out on sleep, so he acts as a personal reminder for you

"If you promise me you'll go to bed, I'll let you help me plan our next show!" "Didn't you tell Emu something like that already?" "True, but you get the special priority!"

You do have to put up with his crazy ideas, but it'd definitely be worth it to see the combination of your ideas on stage!

Tsukasa:

Tsukasa appreciates art quite a bit, and is blown away by everything you make!

He respects your wants to be snug at home, however he does not stand for his favorite costar not going out and enjoying the day!

He'll take you out to everyday places, and although he manages to make a ruckus every single time, he also points out various designs and things he believes you can incorporate in your MVs!

He's used to making sure the people he cares about are in tip top shape, so he also does something about your refusal to rest

"Desperate times call for desperate measure, my dear costar!" "Huh-" He then proceeds to snatch up your drawing device-

He saves your project and then flops down on top of you, refusing to move until you sleep. He probably would have cuddled you until you fell asleep anyway, so it's inevitable-