#i hope ur having a good friday hehe <3 enjoy ur weekend n be safe!!

[inkykeiji]

What do you think would truly enrage and make dazai and chuuya feel a sense of betrayal coming from a reader? Basically what do you think would anger them and what would break their hearts? And of course what would be the consequences of it

wow anon you woke up and chose angst, huh!!! 

warnings: angst, toxic relationships, cheating

words: 1.4k

˚｡⋆♡ 𝐜𝐡𝐮𝐮𝐲𝐚 ♡⋆｡˚ 

lying of any kind, but especially lying via omission, calculated lying—hiding things from him, or purposefully omitting certain details, opinions, or emotions from him, and confiding in someone else instead of him first. 

he is both furious and heartbroken over such behaviour, because he’s so honest and open with you, so trusting and loyal with you, so why can’t you be the same with him? isn’t that how a relationship is supposed to work? the act of bringing your most personal and intimate problems to someone else instead of him would send his mind into a tangled spiral of spiky insecurities, wondering what he did wrong, where he went wrong, why you don’t trust him enough with your deepest secrets or why you don’t want his advice with your darkest issues, how you could do this to him, and, ultimately, if he’s even good enough for you at all. 

this display of utter betrayal would seriously exacerbate his self-esteem issues, sending his already rickety confidence plummeting. he becomes snarky, snappy, and sarcastic with you, his whole demeanor glazed in a thick, hard shield of ice, freezing to the touch and shattering any of your apologies or explanations the moment they come in contact with it.

he’s already snared in suffocating threads of thoughts concerning if this is all his fault, if there’s some sort of issue with him—something wrong with him—that has you feeling as though you can’t share these things with him, or that makes you feel as though you don’t want to share these things with him. the thought has rage seething in his chest, scalding and toxic and burning his lungs with each ragged breath he inhales. the accompanying heartbreak does nothing to cool or soothe his anger, instead grinding salt into the torn-open wound, making it that much more painful. 

it hurts so much, the pressure on his chest too much, heart heavy and full of lead, melting in the fury boiling behind his ribs. and it’s so hot, it’s so hateful, corroding him to the very core of his soul, leaving behind nothing more than a gaping dark hole, edges glowing with cinders; voracious, pitiless, ready to crush his bones beneath it’s agony and swallow him down, swallow him whole, until there’s nothing left. 

and he doesn’t know how to deal with these emotions, has immense trouble controlling and combing through his emotions on a good day, and he finds himself succumbing to their pressure, their power, no matter how hard he tries not to. 

he’s pissed off at you for doing such a thing to him, and he’s pissed off at himself for acting like such an immature little brat over it all, choosing to be cruel and callous and full of sharp passive-aggression instead of communicating properly and talking it out like a fucking adult. 

and he wonders if, maybe, you’re scared of him; scared of his emotions, scared of his reactions, scared of his misunderstandings, his tendency to jump to conclusions, to not think things through, to not listen.

maybe it really is all his fault. maybe he’s been too distant, too unapproachable, too busy and preoccupied with work. maybe he’s inadvertently, unintentionally pushed you away, pushed you into the arms and confidence of someone else, someone better, someone well-suited to understand and relate. 

maybe he really doesn’t deserve you after all.  

˚｡⋆♡ 𝐝𝐚𝐳𝐚𝐢 ♡⋆｡˚

that’s so hard because i genuinely think he is such a difficult person to anger. like the dude has such precise control over his entire body that he can communicate using his HEART RATE, he definitely and very evidently has exceptional control over his emotions. as such, he’d need to really love you, and it would need to be something he didn’t see coming at all—a total surprise, completely unexpected, something he hadn’t planned for because he had assumed it to be impossible. 

as such, cheating is what would anger him most. when he finally enters into a relationship—something serious and deep and scary and real—he is completely and totally 100% devoted to you. in a genuine relationship he gives you ALL of him; the good and the bad and the in-between, and he expects this much from you in return; he expects the same level of devotion and dedication. 

irregardless of this, he doesn’t necessarily stop lying via omission—because i just think this is absolutely another inherent trait to who he is as a person; he has several plans all the time, he likes and values his personal privacy very much—but he’s as honest as he feels he can be with you and only omits things that may jeopardize you or put you in danger; he never omits things for malicious reasons or because he necessarily has something to hide, and as such he always has a good and valid reason for keeping certain things (mostly work related) from you. 

all of this is to say: he would open up to you in a way he never has to anyone else before; he would be vulnerable; exposed, unprotected, ribs pried apart by his own hands—wide open and willing to share his heart with you, no matter how dangerous it may be, no matter the risk or pain or terror involved. he trusts that you will be gentle, careful, cautious; mindful of him and his past and who he truly is at his vey core, accepting of all of him no matter the cost. 

selfishness is an inherent trait within him; it isn’t something he can entirely turn off, though he can more often than not reign it in, subdue it, or tone it down—hide it, mute it, stomp it into something small and sniveling that just barely tinges his life/interactions—until it comes to you, of course. in his most intimate and special relationships, this intrinsic selfishness manifests as extreme possessiveness and protectiveness, as greed and jealousy, as an insatiable desire, hunger, need for you and only you, always. and it is uncontrollable, untamable. 

he would never, ever do such a thing to you, and he had never imagined that the one thing that was supposed to be entirely, wholeheartedly his and his alone could ever not be. 

never in a million years would he expect the one he loves the most—the one he tore his whole chest open for, nails digging into stringy tendons and fingers ripping apart sticky flesh and hands avulsing bone by bone until he got to his core, his center—to shatter his trust in such a way. to take something so precious to him, something he rarely gives out at all, and crush it beneath the heel of their boot until it’s nothing but slim, sharp little slivers buried in dust. 

the thought sends blades of rage searing through his chest, their sharp edges red-hot and glowing, his vision dyed a bloody crimson. your betrayal is ultimate, it’s monumental, it’s worse than anything he’s ever had the misfortune of experiencing before. it completely breaks him beyond repair, fuses his ribs back together in a grotesque and ugly way, never to be opened by anyone ever again, has his heart shriveling up, last drops of love squeezed from it forever. he already had such difficulty with emotions, didn’t often feel guilt or love or happiness or much of anything at all until you wedged yourself into his life, and he’s seen some really horrible and disgusting things in the mafia, but none of it compares to what you’ve done to his chest; how much that hurts, how much it makes his throat clench with dry heaves and his lungs stutter with sobs and his eyes sting with wet disloyalty.

a side note: the other thing that i think would really hurt him is you not making him a priority. he likes to be the center of your life and your attention. it’s fine for you to have (secretly vetted) friends, but when you start putting them and their needs before and above his own, and you start spending more time with them than him, he’s not only going to feel extremely jealous but he’s going to feel extremely hurt, too. once again, his selfishness comes into play here: he wholeheartedly believes he should be your first pick, and should get first pick of you, always, no matter what. he should be the most important person in your life; he should be the one you drop everything for in an instant, without question or complaint.