#i hope this helps and you get to finally enjoy being done with uni for a little while

[hyunebunx]

maybe it's not our fault - chapter 04

── synopsis: after a nasty breakup that’s left you completely shattered, you’re set on giving up on love forever. That is until, in a surprising turn of events, your respective best friends start dating and one of their main goals is to restore the peace in your broken relationship. Will their plan succeed? Will they manage to play cupid and get you and your high school sweetheart back together, or will it all backfire and result in the end of their own love story?

There is only one way to find out. If only your beloved’s heart wasn’t already broken beyond repair…

╰─▸ ❝ pairing: hyunjin x fem!reader

╰─▸ ❝ content: exes to lovers, angst, mutual pining, fluff, suggestive themes, drama and heartbreak, jock!hyunjin who is captain of the uni's football team + dance major!hyunjin, college au, lack of communication.

╰─▸ ❝ word count: 8,5k

a/n: soo this took me forever but i hope there's still people that will enjoy this!! <3 this chapter picks up right where the previous one left off.

“For someone who claimed to want to talk, you’re not saying a whole lot.”

In the dim parking lot light, Hyunjin stares down at you with curiosity, arms crossed over his broad chest like a shield. You’re a few feet away from the car, and not as close as before, but somehow, you finally notice all of these fine details about him. There’s a faint bruise above his eye, the culprit, his silver eyebrow piercing shining with pride when the light hits it just right. His roots are growing in, pitch black and healthy, fighting against the bleach with all of their might. Muscle tape soothes the back of his neck, obscured by the long hair that serves as a curtain between him and the nosy world. The people who were just as nosy as you were currently being.

Shifting your weight from one foot to the other, you hug yourself to keep warm before opening your mouth, eyes downcast. “Are you alright?”

Surprise flashes across his features, and you catch it just in time because the moment you raise your gaze, it’s gone.

“Look at me as you’re thinking of your next answer.”

He doesn’t, not even bothering to pretend he acknowledged what you just said.

“I’m fine.” Hyunjin sighs, letting his head fall back briefly like he needed to pull himself together to have this conversation. “As a matter of fact, I’m great! Never felt better!”

You can tell he’s lying from a mile away. Because while his words say one thing, his body language and everything else about him tell a different story. He doesn’t rest all his weight on both feet, crossing them at the ankles for better balance. If standing hurt this much, you couldn’t begin to imagine how executing one of his difficult choreographies would feel.

“I was worried about you.” You allow yourself to be vulnerable, to tell him everything you’ve rehearsed thousands of times while imagining this encounter. It’s hard because there are so many words and feelings currently fighting for dominance in your head, all longing for a chance to speak to him. Because every fiber of your being was aware of one thing – you might never get this opportunity again.

In response to your inner turmoil, Hyunjin scoffs and chuckles softly, like finding any humor in the matter takes a lot of effort. “Don’t make me laugh.”

Your eyes widen, puzzled.

“If you truly cared, you would have done more than send a flimsy ‘get well soon’ card.”

“I didn’t know!” You’re quick to defend yourself, panic and anger mingling as fear creeps in, terrified that his opinion of you might’ve changed quite drastically. “I had no idea you got injured until a few weeks ago! They all kept it from me, so don’t blame me for whatever shit Chris has been doing behind my back. I had no say in it.”

Hyunjin’s lips part but no words come out, stunning him into silence for the time being.

“I somehow find that hard to believe.” He eventually shakes his head, dismissing any rational thought that might’ve tried to help him make sense of your explanation. Instead of listening to his mind, Hyunjin chooses to listen to his wounded heart, which brings forth all of the anger and bitterness he’s been bottling up for months.

“Are you fucking serious?” But you do the same, your heart responding in kind as you step closer, all up in his face. “Why are you being like this?”

“Like what?” Hyunjin snaps, just as aggravated, dropping his arms and finally opening himself up to you. “What the fuck am I doing wrong now, Y/n?” He huffs, almost like a bomb ready to explode any second. His anger has only ever gotten the best of him one time in the past, clouding his judgment and ending your relationship on the spot.

Were you about to witness it take control of him again, before losing your own cool?

“Mean.” You throw your arms up, frustrated and on the verge of tears. “You’re being mean when all I did was express my concerns for you!”

In the quiet parking lot, your argument is loud enough for all of your neighbors to hear, including Seohyun and Felix, who were left all alone in Hyunjin’s car. Under normal circumstances, the thought alone would have you curl into yourself in shame, but right now, you couldn’t care less. Even if this conversation was quickly turning into something neither of you would be able to come back from, just like all of your fights in the past.

“Well, apparently it’s in my nature so I can’t fucking help it, remember?!” He bites back, unwilling to pay any close attention to the mess you were slowly but surely morphing into right before his eyes.

Oh, how you wish you didn’t, the accusation rushing into you at a speed that knocks the air out of your lungs harshly. Mean, selfish, and inconsiderate. They were all words you spoke with your own mouth a few months ago, during one of your unplanned, weekly argument sessions. Words meant to hurt him just as much as his distance and dismissal were hurting you, to cut deep and make him bleed.

You were now regretting them more than anything, wishing you could turn back time and smack the both of you over the head so you could stop fighting and realize how much the other cared. How much you cared about him and your relationship because you were unsure as to when Hyunjin stopped caring about you.

Flinching, you look away and step back, putting some much-needed distance between you.

“I’m sorry.” You manage to say, your anger subsiding.

Years ago, before Hyunjin began changing into this person you didn’t know, he was always the first one to apologize after a fight, not caring who was technically at fault. He had no issues stepping over his ego and rushing to you, wishing to make things right as soon as possible, resembling a kicked puppy who’ll follow his owner to the ends of the earth no matter how many times he got left behind, abandoned.

And you always forgave him. Hopefully, he’ll find it in his heart to do the same now.

Hyunjin just shrugs and looks away, but you catch a glimpse of unshed tears in his beautiful eyes that used to sparkle so brightly, putting all of your favorite constellations to shame.

With a tentative step in his direction, you add, the sound of your heart shattering making it hard for your thoughts to make themselves heard. “Had I known about what happened, I would have dropped everything to come and see you.” Then, your voice drops as you shallow, struggling to continue staring at him. “You know this.”

Hyunjin responds a little too quickly, shaking his head. “I don’t know anything.”

Your head falls, his unwillingness to meet you halfway hitting harder than before. It seemed that no matter what you chose to say, he’d vehemently deny it until the end, not finding it in himself to believe a word. His solitary quest of erasing you and all of your love filled memories was keeping him on the right path, immune to all of your heartbreak and despair.

“If that’s all.” He clears his throat, forcing himself to look in your direction as he trails off and stops messing with the ring on his index finger. A new one that replaced the simple, black ring you got him a few years ago, that was part of a couple set which matched with your white one. The ring you threw in your jewelry box, trying to hide from view, unable to look at for more than a few seconds at a time without tears welling up in your eyes.

Rings you both never took off, now abandoned in a dark corner of your rooms – out of sight and out of mind. They were a pair, only making sense together. Just like you and him have for years.

Does Hyunjin still have it? Does it haunt his dreams, jolting him awake once he realizes he hasn’t seen it in a while?

Or has he thrown it in the trash along with your relationship?

They weren’t particularly expensive, but you liked to believe their value came from what they represented. A token of love, priceless and so different from the other models who didn’t get to enjoy adorning Hyunjin’s slender finger.

“Good talk.”

You snap out of it the moment his back comes into view, and suddenly, you’re panicking like never before. The air doesn’t seem to reach your lungs anymore, yet your heart speeds up, the sight of him walking away, as painful as she remembered.

“Wait, Hyunjin!” You plead before your brain can process it, hurrying after him and reaching for his hand, trying to pull him back. To prevent him from disappearing again, like a fleeting memory you couldn’t hold on to as you wake up from a deep slumber.

But you’re not fast enough, your fingers only managing to brush against his and not grasp them entirely, falling short. This marks the second time he slips through your fingers, the second time you fail at keeping him in your life.

However, before you can drown in self-pity, Hyunjin startles you by turning around on his own accord, eyes wide.

“You’re freezing.” It’s not a question but a statement, one he confirms once he properly grasps your hand and approaches hurriedly. Without wasting a second, Hyunjin removes his red cardigan and drapes it over your shoulders, making quick work of the buttons to get you warm as soon as possible.

You’re so taken aback that you don’t register what’s happening until he’s at eye level, arms on full display as he’s left only in a black band t-shirt.

“I’m fine.” You try to wiggle your trapped arms, protesting. “Hyunjin, seriously! Take it back!”

But he doesn’t listen, as expected. “You shouldn’t have given your jacket away when it’s this cold out.”

“You’re one to talk?”

“I’ll be fine.” He dismisses your worries just as he reaches the last button of his fluffy cardigan. “You, on the other hand, get sick easily.”

When he pulls away, you see him cast an inspecting look over your form just as your arms slip into the baggy sleeves, nodding in satisfaction. “There, all better now.”

Your response comes as a whisper, a pathetic attempt at regaining your balance after the sudden turn this conversation has taken. “Is it really?”

The last thing you expected was for him to show you any type of compassion or be concerned after spending all of this time acting like you didn’t exist in his world, a big shadow that didn’t frighten him anymore, one he could walk past without any issues.

But the implication of your silly question isn’t lost on either of you, and as he looks away, preparing to flee again, your hands boldly latch themselves into his t-shirt to pull him back, almost closing the never-ending distance between your two bodies. “Please, don’t go.”

Hyunjin frowns, visible pain contorting his beautiful features in the most heartbreaking way that almost has you regretting your words. He’s speechless in front of the phrase he’s been wanting to hear roll down your tongue for so long, needing to see he means as much to you as you mean to him.

Or meant.

“Please stop shutting me out.” By this point, you’re begging, desperate to be seen and heard by the person who once was your entire world. “Let me be there for you again, your shoulder to cry on. You don’t have to bear all of this pain alone, Hyun.”

He inhales sharply, looking away like your words sting, touch the deepest part of his core that nobody in existence has ever managed to reach.

Now, in the dim parking lot light, you’re able to see all of him, the way his resolve breaks in the form of clear tears that rush to his eyes but don’t dare fall, held hostage behind the wall he’s built between him and the entire world.

“I don’t know how to.” His response is quiet, soft like the brush of a feather against your cheek, sign he’s barely willing to admit this weakness to himself.

You shake your head, unwilling to accept his reasoning. “Yes, you do. I know how much you hate when people worry about you but – “

“Then stop.” His interruption is harsh, almost as harsh as the storm currently taking place behind his lifeless eyes. “Stop worrying and leave me alone. It’s for the best.”

“How can you even think that?” Your hands drop down to find his own, hesitant in reaching out to hold them and settling for the way they briefly brush against each other, hoping some of your newfound warmth could soothe him.

“Because it’s true. I can’t seem to be able to do anything right, so it’s only fitting I stop trying.”

Hyunjin has always had such a positive outlook on life and everything around him, truly believing that as long as you didn’t give up, as long as you were a good person, good things will inevitably find you. Such words coming out of his mouth were made to sound like a foreign language he’s recently learned in your absence.

“Hyun…” Your hands flex, itching to share some of the comfort you were able to provide.

Eventually, his shoulders slump forward, eyes fluttering shut as he tries to steady his breathing, so dejected it almost brings you to tears. “I’m tired, Y/n.”

“So, so tired of everything and everyone wanting something from me. My time, my attention, my love, and energy. I don’t have anything else to give. I’m not capable of giving anymore.”

Even if they’re not meant to be one, considering his current state, his words do feel like a jab at your last conversation, the tantrum you threw that inevitably led to the end of your relationship. You’ve always wanted too much, expected everything. More of his time, attention, and a gram of the love he was busily pouring into other things and people who weren’t you.

But could you really be blamed? After spending all of these years as his top priority, his favorite person nobody could compare to, wasn’t it only natural to panic once his focus shifted to something else?

A relationship can only develop if both parties are equally involved, blooming and growing with the help of their love and affection for one another. But towards the end, you are the only one constantly giving your all and making sacrifices in a desperate attempt to breathe life back into your dying and withering relationship. You are stuck watching the love pour out from a hole you can’t find.

So, in this situation, who should be the one expressing how tired they were? How depleted they’ve felt for months on end, barely holding on to the lifeline their friends have kindly thrown out into the sea to keep them afloat?

“Then rest and reevaluate your priorities.” You mumble, actively feeling the way your heart is desperately trying to stitch itself back together. “You can’t be doing everything at once, Hyunjin.”

“I have been resting.” Hyunjin straightens, shoving one of his hands in the pocket of his baggy pants.

“Your body, sure.” You search for his gaze as your hand bravely embarks on a new journey, its destination unknown. “But what about your mind?” It settles over his chest, happy to feel him relax at the gentle touch. “What about your heart?” You point, poking his chest repeatedly right over the part of him you used to love with every fiber of your being.

It comes as a surprise when Hyunjin responds in kind, gently enveloping your hand in his to stop you. “I’m fine.” What causes your heart to stop beating momentarily is that he doesn’t let go.

You sigh, already exasperated at his excessive use of this infuriating phrase. “You’ve always been such a bad liar.”

Then, the unexpected happens. Hyunjin laughs, eyes crinkling at the corners most endearingly. You used to kiss those faint wrinkles, dotting them just like you would on him, adoring the proof of his happiness.

“You’re the only one who can tell because you know me too well. I don’t have such problems with other people.”

“And isn’t that sad?” You enquire, shifting in his hold to intertwine your fingers. “To be surrounded by people who don’t know you? The real you?”

His smile vanishes and you almost wish to take it all back, remain silent just so he could be happy for longer. Just so he could smile and pretend you weren’t a lost cause, a story with a hopeless future that will always end tragically.

“It’s depressing.” He admits easily, almost like he’s been waiting for someone to finally see through him and call his bluff. A tortured artist, Hyunjin has always had a flair for the dramatic.

Silence settles between you, making itself comfortable as you pull your hand back and begin unbuttoning the red cardigan, which still has that specific, new clothing smell mixed with his usual cologne.

Hyunjin doesn’t protest as you take it off to drape over his shoulders, sharing your warmth like you’ve done countless times before, eyes watching you like a hawk. Soft but oh so attentive, studying your every micro-expression like he’d do with the models in one of his painting classes, not missing a breath.

“I have so much to say.” A bittersweet laugh escapes you, causing some of the tears you’ve managed to keep at bay for so long to escape and roll down your cheeks freely. You could spend your whole night here, in this parking lot with him, just talking until the sun rose and you’d be forced to part to start a new day. One that didn’t involve the other anymore. “So many questions. So many stories I’ve saved up, kept to myself because I know you’re the only one who could ever understand.”

Regret cripples his beautiful features as he makes to reach out, to touch and wipe your tears, as expressive as you’ve grown to love him. Unfortunately, he doesn’t have the strength to do so, arms falling to his side pathetically.

You shallow back your tears, wiping your eyes a little too harshly. “But right now, as I’m looking at you, all I want to say is please, take care of yourself.”

“Take your time to dwell on everything until you realize this is not you. This, the version of you that’s currently in front of me, isn’t the Hyunjin everyone has come to love.”

With a deep breath, one that barely fills your lungs with air, your gazes lock for the last time.

“You’re not this cold, unapproachable person that shuts all of his loved ones out. You’re not an island meant to exist by yourself. Remember that.”

Hyunjin stares at you and the way your mouth moves, speechless, unsure how to respond or react to the kindness you are currently showing him. It’s like he couldn’t, unable to speak no matter how hard he tried, the lump in his throat preventing any of his true feelings from escaping.

He couldn’t comprehend why you were still being so nice to him, so loving and compassionate when he’d been anything but that since you met up tonight.

“I – don’t…know what to say.” He manages to let out, voice shaky and on the verge of breaking.

A tiny smile creeps onto your features, bittersweet among the tears that have dried on your cheeks. “That’s alright. Thank you for listening to me; that’s all I needed.”

That’s when you step back towards your apartment building, increasing the distance so you’ll finally be able to breathe. You’re still staring at each other, frozen on the spot, afraid that if you glance away even for a second, the other will disappear.

“Can you please go and wake Seohyun?”

Hyunjin doesn’t respond right away, eyes locked into yours as his lips part in search of the proper words that would finally put an end to your misery. Words that would help you go back to the way things were before, to a happier time in your life where his love had you up on cloud nine, feeling invincible in front of everything that life threw your way.

He looks almost pitiful, unable to grasp the hand you’ve given him, the olive branch that would close the distance between you, help him traverse oceans, and get home safe and sound.

So, he does the only thing he can. Hyunjin nods and grants your wish, swiftly turning on his heel to walk away, towards your two sleeping friends. As you watch him, you feel multiple pieces of your heart detaching to run after him, a painful sensation, similar to the hurt you’d feel while peeling a band-aid off a fresh wound.

When Seohyun steps out, stretching her arms above her head, still wearing your jacket, Felix follows. They exchange a few words before Hyunjin departs, rounding the car to get to his seat, closing himself off from the world.

And then, they hug and you can’t help but stare at the scene with an unusual amount of interest. They look great together, like Barbie and Ken, made especially for one another, never meant to be separated.

Seohyun is beaming as she skips towards you, and so is Felix as he waves goodbye from his place by the car, sharing a happiness you haven’t felt in a long time. He doesn’t join Hyunjin until he sees your best friend pulling you into a brief embrace, giddy like it’s the first time you crossed paths tonight.

The car then drives off and that’s when your tears return in full force, cascading down your cheeks in a sight that alarms Seohyun who gasps and checks your body for any potential injuries you might have acquired in the past 20 minutes you’ve spent apart.

“Babe? What’s wrong?” Her hold on your shoulders tightens, worry written all over her pretty face as she searches for your wandering gaze. “Did something happen?”

You shake your head, but you’re not as convincing as you hoped since the tears don’t stop. “I just want to go home.”

Seohyun links your arms and begins dragging you forward, away from the parking lot and the conversation that has shattered your heart once again.

The next morning, you finally text Changbin back.

A few days later, Friday finds you on your way to class when an urgent phone call has you make a detour to one of your favorite places, to your relief. Anything to skip another never ending lecture you didn’t know how to get out of without Chris or Jisung’s help, who were both too busy with their careers to assist at the moment.

Furry Friends Rescue looked just about the same, standing proudly with all the Halloween decorations you’ve put up ahead of the anticipated holiday. Mrs. Jeon has still not made her return, so you were helping out more than usual – not that you minded anyway. Right now, it was one of those instances, having to hurry over to cover for the guy who was supposed to open the shelter but got caught up with a presentation he forgot all about. In consequence, the shelter was still closed at 11 am which meant the animals still hadn’t had their breakfast.

Dealing with hungry little furballs all by yourself wasn’t how you expected your Friday to go, but you can manage. After all, being alone had become like second nature these days.

That’s why you weren’t expecting to bump into him again.

“Y/n!” Jaemin exclaims as you approach, already halfway through the door. You hurry over, nudging him inside and quickly closing the door before one of the wandering animals can escape.

“I thought I was the only one here…” He mumbles, not meeting your eyes.

You nod, not oblivious to the way things seem to have changed between you since that last game. “I didn’t know Siwoo called you as well.” You exhale, suddenly out of breath. “Well, since you’re here and seem to have everything under control I’ll go – “

“I’m sorry, Y/n.”

You whip around to face him a little too quickly, surprised at his sudden apology. Jaemin stands tall, not wavering even as Snowflake, the shelter’s star, struts over and begins rubbing her little face against his legs in a loving greeting, the type you never had the pleasure of getting.

Seems like the elephant in the room was too grand for poor Jaemin to ignore any further, feeling genuine remorse about the way your relationship soured.

Still, you play dumb. “Sorry? For what?”

“For keeping it from you.” You know exactly what he’s alluding to. “I’m not the captain and I’ll never be. I’m just filling in until he recovers and gets back.” Somehow, saying Hyunjin’s name seems to be as difficult for him as it is for you. Or maybe it’s avoided out of consideration for you.

“Jaemin – “

“Let me finish.” He takes a step closer, bleached hair pushed out of his face. “I never meant to be the captain. That was never my intention. But what was I supposed to do? The coach was desperate and I felt too bad to turn him down in time of need.”

Jaemin is tall, but now, as he bares his soul to you, a person he met a mere month ago, he looks comically tiny. His vulnerability makes him feel small.

“I thought I did the right thing but now almost every guy on the team seems to hate me.” The breath he lets out shakes him to his core, and you can finally take a peek at the exhaustion that’s been hiding underneath that bright smile. You couldn’t even begin to imagine how it felt to lead a team of people who disliked you, how all of their feet would feel while trampling all over your heart, treating you like the biggest cartoon villain in history.

And now, your initial assessment of him felt a little too cruel. Jaemin didn’t replace Hyunjin willingly and certainly did not mean to erase him from the team, as you and the other players were quick to think.

He was just trying to help. You didn’t know him for long, but his helpful nature has been obvious from day one, enough to get Mrs. Jeon to trust him to take your place. Why did you allow your emotions to treat him so harshly?

Before you can process it, your hand lands on his arm. “They don’t hate you.”

His gaze flies to the casual touch, your attempt at comfort appreciated. “Sure.” Jaemin snorts. “Choi tried to fight me.”

You remember the conversation you witnessed at the game, the stupid plan Yeonjun and Daehyun bonded over. Nothing like an ambush to bring peace between two pigheaded men.

You attempt to suppress a smile, clearing your throat at a memory that steps forward. “Yeonjun has also tried to fight Hyunjin in the past. Daehyun is still trying.”

“Really?”

You nod. “Oh, yeah. Yeonjun thought Hyunjin was too stuck-up and they butted heads all the time. It took a while for them to see eye to eye and even more to become the friends they are today.”

Jaemin’s eyes widen in surprise. “Stuck up? The captain?”

A laugh bubbles out of you, amused at the admiration hidden behind said eyes. “Hyunjin has always been a team player, but being a leader is different. He thought everyone should follow his lead without complaint, not bothering to consult with the others as long as they won the game.”

“That – “ He trails off, wanting to make sure you’re not messing with him. “Doesn’t sound like him at all.”

Despite yourself, you grin. “Well, he’s had three years to get to this point. Do you think he’d still be captain if he continued without changing?”

He’s silent, taking it all in. Jaemin hasn’t been part of the team for long but it seems like the thought of his teammates growing and evolving has never crossed his mind. He just assumed they were all perfect from the beginning. Everyone but him.

“And Daehyun is just stupid, plain and simple.” You add.

Jaemin bursts out laughing, some of the tension leaving his battered shoulders. “I can only agree.”

“So don’t worry about them. Men in sports are strange creatures anyway; you’ll never be able to make all of them happy.”

You take his silent contemplating as an opportunity to crouch down to Snowflake’s level and scratch under her chin, cooing at her beautiful white fur as she begins purring in appreciation.

“What about you?” He suddenly asks, joining you on the floor. “Can I make you happy?”

Your heart thumps loudly, almost knocking the breath out of your lungs at his bold question, heat rushing to your face. “W-What do you mean?”

Jaemin runs a hand through his hair, revealing his helix piercing and the red that’s staining the top of his ears. He’s embarrassed, and you can’t help the terror that’s quickly creeping into your heart at the fact that the prospect of a confession is no longer as terrifying as before.

Looking up at you from beneath long lashes, he flushes. “Are we still friends?”

And then, it just stops. You pause, wondering if you heard him right. He’s staring at you so pleadingly, so close to you and your barricaded heart. Taking pity on him is the only right answer, especially after he just poured his heart out just for your sake. Just to make sure your opinion of him hasn’t changed, that you don’t hate him like his teammates do.

Judging by the look on his face, it’s obvious he couldn’t handle that reality. Not after becoming public enemy number one.

With a smile, you reach and poke his forehead, chasing his worries away. “What do you think, dummy? Of course we are.”

Relief floods his features, eyes sparkling with unshed tears he obviously doesn’t want you to notice, swinging backwards with a sigh as Snowflake suddenly jumps into his lap. You laugh, amused by his antics, and he soon joins, just a little strained.

“Thank fuck.” He exhales, sitting up. “Work would have been awkward otherwise.”

You snort, pushing his shoulder before standing up. “Bold of you to assume Mrs. Jeon would let you keep coming back after upsetting me.”

A cocky smirk finds its way on pink lips as he leans back onto his forearms. “You seem to forget Mrs. Jeon has left me in charge until she returns.” Snowflake meows and he reaches to pet her. “You would have been the one let go.”

You frown down at him and he finally laughs, throwing his head back in pure delight.

Just as you move past him to the backroom in search of the food for the hungry furballs, he calls out. “We should hang out sometimes! Outside of work.”

“After you threatened to fire me?” You shout back, busy grabbing one of the big bags of nutritious, top-quality food Mrs. Jeon loved to splurge on. “Not a chance!”

“Come on, I was joking!” But he’s still laughing, no sign of wanting to give a helping hand.

You don’t respond.

“Y/n?”

“I changed my mind. I don’t want to be friends anymore.”

As expected, your statement is only met with another round of laughter you can’t help but reciprocate.

The following week, you begin meeting with Changbin quite frequently, full of inspiration and ready to do your part of the project. Working with him is even better than expected, all smiles, laughter, and good banter that only aids you both in your creative endeavors.

You now realize your apprehensions were all for nothing, your similar creative visions making this whole process a pleasant experience you wouldn’t have otherwise enjoyed were it not for Mr. Kim and his absurd demands.

You were a creature of habit, too placid in your comfort zone, only ever working with Chris and Jisung when the time called for it. One thing that art in itself isn’t. You’ve been told countless times that to become a true artist, one who’ll truly touch people’s hearts, you need to step out of your bubble and spread your wings. But you were never willing to. You still aren’t, not fully anyway. But working with Changbin makes the whole ordeal seem less scary, not as intimidating or frustrating as you thought it’d be.

Today, as you step into the familiar studio, Changbin is joined by Chris and Jisung who are caught up in a heated debate of sorts.

“Hi?”

All three heads swing around to face you, too in synch for your liking, and the conversation fizzles out. Almost like they didn’t want you to hear whatever they were discussing.

“Sup!” Changbin is the first one to greet you, standing up to offer a comforting side hug. “These two will, unfortunately, be joining us today. I hope that’s okay.”

“Unfortunately?” Chris scoffs, kicking Bin’s chair.

“We are her best friends! Us! Not you!” Jisung adds, crossing his arms from his place on the couch.

Changbin rolls his eyes as you hide a giggle behind your hand, walking back to his seat to roll his chair next to Chan’s, bumping into him as some sort of silent warning.

“What are you guys up to?” You ask after greeting your two pouty best friends, giving them the proper hugs needed to stop their sulking. When you finally sit on the couch, Jisung makes himself comfortable with his head in your lap, lounging about like he owns the place.

“You know.” Changbin nods towards their open laptops. “Work.”

Jisung’s only response is a groan, rolling around to bury his head in your fluffy sweater, not wanting to be part of this conversation. Instinctively, your hand finds his soft locks and begins combing through them.

You haven’t seen these two in a while, work keeping them even busier than usual. It’s been lonely, especially since Seohyun has started spending most of her free time with Felix of all people. Seems like their relationship was getting too serious, too fast and you didn’t know how to feel about it.

Felix was a great guy, one of the nicest people you’ve had the pleasure of meeting. But your best friend was known for jumping into things, head first, without much thought. Did he really like her as much as she thought? Did she actually have feelings for him beyond the initial infatuation?

But you couldn’t interfere. After all, you weren’t able to keep your own relationship afloat, so who were you to doubt theirs?

You just hoped Seohyun was being careful. As much as you liked to think you knew Felix, he’s spent the last few years in a different environment, away from his friends and everything he was accustomed to. The probability of him being a completely different person despite appearances was never zero.

“I’m guessing that means your projects are done?” You probe, untangling Jisung’s hair.

Chris shakes his head, brown curls flying everywhere. “We haven’t even started yet.”

“That’s because his partner is an ex situationship. He’s running away.” Jisung chimes in, voice muffled by the material of your clothing.

Chris gasps a little too loudly, face flushing in embarrassment as Changbin cackles at his misery, having the time of his life. You can tell by the look in his eyes that he wants to deny it, even argue with Jisung, but the truth prevents him from doing so.

Tugging on his hair, you then look down at the man in your lap. “And what’s your excuse?”

Jisung groans, university assignments being the bane of his existence. “You know me! I don’t feel any pressure to do anything until the very last day!”

Oh, yeah. Very on brand for the king of procrastination.

“I told you we’re way ahead of everyone else.” Changbin suddenly says, puffing up his chest, pride written all over his features.

Chris turns towards you, surprised. “You’re writing again?”

When you nod, he breaks out into the brightest smile, one that could put the sun to shame, and your heart grows at the pride you feel radiating off of him. He and Changbin both seem to be happier than you at the fact that you finally found your voice again.

“Not only is she writing again, she finished a whole song all by herself yesterday!” With the way he’s boasting, you’d think Changbin is talking about one of his achievements. You were so grateful for him and the way he’s been supporting you, holding your hand through this difficult journey made easier by his kind words, how he didn’t rush or berate you for feeling stuck.

“What?” Jisung sits up, staring between you and his friend. “And you didn’t play it for us?”

Changbin shakes his head. “No can do. It’s Y/n’s song, only she can decide when to play it for others.”

“Yet you heard it.” Chris pouts, joining Jisung as you try to muffle your giggles at their antics.

“I produced it!”

“I could have produced it as well!”

Chris clears his throat, grabbing both of their attention. “I’ve known her for longer.”

“That has nothing to do with this!” They almost yell in unison, and you finally lose it, falling backwards on the couch as laughter overwhelms you.

The loud chatter continues and your happiness reaches new highs, the three of them never fail to lift your spirits. They’ve always managed to make you feel included, no matter how many people were asking for their attention at a time, never turning their backs on you in favor of impressing potential contacts who could help further their careers.

Hanging out with the three of them felt like old times when your big friend group would get together and party until the sun came up. When you’d go on trips and have the time of your life, along with your beloved and these people who loved you unconditionally.

You missed it, but above it all, you felt guilty, not managing to shake off this irritating voice that loved to whisper nonsense in your ear. About how you’re not enough, how it’s all your fault they all fell apart, divided because of the tragic ending that has cursed your love story.

It might as well have been all of your fault. You just hoped, deep down, that Chris would be able to find it in himself to forgive you because you could never forgive yourself.

Time flies as you’re having fun, projects, work, and university all forgotten in favor of catching up and discussing everything that comes to mind, comfortable among friends to give free rein to your deepest thoughts. Changbin talks about this new girl he’s seeing, how the thrill of a new relationship keeps him awake at night. He’s always been a hopeless romantic. Chris opens up about that ex situationship of his, how running away from that responsibility has been keeping his steps up.

Jisung is about to open up about Yoona until the distinct beeping of a code being pushed in reaches your ears and the door swings open, startling the four of you as the conversation comes to an abrupt stop.

Because in steps none other than Minho, closely followed by Seungmin.

“Oh?” Minho blinks, pointily ignoring your presence. “Are we interrupting tea time, princesses?”

Changbin laughs, but the sound isn’t genuine, a little awkward as Jisung rolls his eyes so far back you’re sure he greeted his brain. Chris tries his best to smile and be welcoming, but you can see right through him. Something, or maybe someone, is clearly bothering him.

“Can’t you knock?” Jisung is just as blunt, not bothering to greet either of them.

Minho’s eyebrows hike up. “Why would I? I have the code for a reason, unlike someone in here.”

You don’t know if he’s talking about you or Jisung, who got this benefit removed a few months ago when he brought over a random groupie, too impatient to make it back to the apartment.

Either way, he’s still annoyed, puffing and blowing hair out of his face while fishing out his phone to put an end to this conversation.

“Sorry, we didn’t mean to interrupt.” Seungmin’s honeyed voice calms the spirits as he steps forward. “I had no idea you were having a meeting.”

“They’re clearly not.” With that said, Minho’s eyes finally met yours, narrowed in that usual glare he seemed to save for the people he truly disliked. Like you.

It sends a shiver down your spine, the unpleasant kind, whole body tenses up under his scrutinizing gaze. You’ve always found Minho’s eyes beautiful and that unfortunately hasn’t changed even as his opinion of you did.

Jisung and Minho used to be like two peas in a pod, inseparable, sharing a bond that would often leave others green with envy. You’d sometimes get into playful arguments with Minho, demanding he return your best friend at once, before you were both pulled into a hug by said best friend, forced to make up by his bright laughter.

Now, they couldn’t stand one another.

“Why are you guys here? Did something happen at home?” Changbin finally breaks the awkward silence, standing up to properly greet his two friends.

Minho shakes his head, while Seungmin adds. “No. Just wanted to talk to you about the festival.”

“Festival?” The question escapes without your consent, and the attention is back on you.

Seungmin looks confused. “You haven’t told her?” This question is pointed toward your best friend who only shakes his head sheepishly.

“It slipped my mind.”

Jisung looks exasperated, just barely holding himself back from leaving the room as your eyes dart between them, full of questions.

“Well, that’s fine.” His face comes into view, reserved smile on full display as he addresses you. Seungmin has always been more introverted than the others. “The film festival is taking place next week. Our university has managed to bring in some seasoned film critics to judge this year’s submissions, which also includes one of my short movies.”

Then, with utmost gentleness, like you were an easily frightened child, his hand lands on your shoulder. “I hope you can make it.”

Seungmin…was inviting you?

The film festival was a yearly event, one of the biggest ones at your university, close behind the dance competition and the beloved football season. Jisung loves movies, so you were always in attendance, surrounded by your friend group and their entertaining banter that made the night even more special.

But after your falling out, you didn’t expect anyone to want you there.

“Changbin?” Minho’s sharp voice cuts through, and Seugmin straightens. “A word?”

Changbin follows them outside after Seugmin bids everyone goodbye with another soft smile, and the door clicks shut behind them, leaving the three of you alone.

Jisung is grumbling under his breath, finally able to relax while Chris turns towards you, with one of his famous smiles, eyes sparkling for some unknown reason. He’s taken off his beanie, rolled up his sleeves, tattoos on full display – he means business.

“Isn’t this great?” He hums, taking hold of your hands. His are cold. “It’s been a while since we’ve all done something together. I bet Seohyun will be thrilled.”

“As if she actually cares.” Jisung mumbles, draping himself over the couch to get to the mini fridge in the corner.

Chris ignores him, his hold on you tightening. “What do you think, sweetheart? Feel like watching some up and coming masterpieces with me?”

You see the longing in his eyes, the wish for things to go back to normal – for you to regain your spark. He misses them, the friends you used to spend all of your time with, and your heart drops. It’s all your fault. If it weren’t for you and your emotional outburst, things would have still been fine.

You and Hyunjin would still be together, Chris would still have his friends, and Jisung wouldn’t act like they never existed. Everyone wouldn’t be so divided.

Why did you have to ruin everything?

“Chris, I…don’t think it’s a good idea.” His face falls, so you quickly add. “I don’t want to ruin it for everyone.”

The perplexity on his face makes you feel even worse. “What? What are you even talking about? Seungmin invited you himself.”

You shake your head. “Just because I happened to be here, and I asked about it. I’m sure I put him in an awkward position where he felt like he had to.���

“Nonsense!” He denies your ridiculous claims in a heartbeat.

“Chris, no offense, but I’d rather spend my night with people that like me and enjoy my company.”

“We can have our own movie night, bug.” Jisung chides, big hands landing on your shoulders from behind. “Horror, of course.”

Chris completely brushes off Jisung’s comment, still committed to convincing you. “He wouldn’t have invited you if he didn’t like you, Y/n. Wake up.”

“No, you need to wake up!” Jisung snaps before you can say anything, eyes two sharp slits ready to come for his throat. You fall back against his chest, pulled by his strong arms, almost like he was trying to protect you from the intensity of his next words. “You’ve been going on and on about this for days, insisting we all act like nothing happened just so we can fulfill your absurd fantasy! Let it go.”

Chris’s eyes narrow. “You’re one to talk? Seugmin tried to do a nice thing and you, along with Minho, ruined it for everyone!”

Now you were lost. What were they talking about?

“Why the fuck do you care more about Seugmin than about your best friend and the way that group has been treating her?”

The silence that follows is deafening, more damaging than any booming sound, both for your ears and your fragile heart. You’re speechless, eyes glued to the floor, unable to look at Chris and see the hurt flash across his face – hurt you’ve caused. Jisung was just trying to defend you but he could have been nicer; you should have said something else before things escalated to this level.

“Are you fucking serious?” Is all Chris manages to murmur after pushing past his disbelief, staring you both down with an intensity that could break even the most resilient person. However, Jisung isn’t as easily spooked, meeting his gaze head-on, always the most stubborn one in the room.

“I have been nothing but supportive. Been your shoulder to lean on, cry and breakdown on whenever you needed. I kept watch over you for months, every day without fail, just to make sure you weren’t drowning in self-pity.”

That was true. You were quite pathetic after things ended between you and Hyunjin, like a house without land or a boat without water, just floating aimlessly. Chris rushed over the moment you called, to be your rock and bring you back to the surface, not leaving even as your crying never subsided. He was the first one to know, the first one you confided in, the one whose shirt you soaked with your tears.

For the first two months spent in Australia, when it was only you, him, and his family, he never let you out of sight. Chris took you everywhere with him, trying to rope you into new activities, hobbies you might enjoy that could bring your smile back even for the briefest moment needed for his batteries to recharge.

You couldn’t have regained that sense of normality without him by your side, holding your hand every step of the way.

“I tried to open your eyes and make you see that nobody hates you. They don’t blame you for what happened because frankly, it doesn’t concern any of them!” He runs a hand through unruly curls, visibly distressed.

“The person Minho hates is me, not you! Do you know why? Because he’s convinced I picked you over Hyunjin, which I fucking did.” Your breath hitches in your throat, and that’s when you feel Jisung freeze behind you, most of the fight leaving his body.

You had no idea Minho resented him for that. Chris became a villain in someone’s story because of you. Chris, sunshine embodied, the guy who wouldn’t hurt a fly.

“And the worst part of it all is that I can’t condone him. I would have hated myself too.”

You have a hunch he already does. Chris has always had the habit of blaming himself for everything going wrong in his life, sometimes for things that were obviously out of his control.

Then he turns to address Jisung. “And you dare say I don’t care about Y/n.”

Jisung looks away, biting the side of his cheek, most likely ashamed of his previous outburst.

“You’re so far up your ass that you can’t even see your friends miss you and are trying to make amends.”

At that, Jisung scoffs, most likely not believing his words entirely. Chris’s eyes narrow.

“Playing mediator was never my fucking job yet I still did it because I care about you two and your happiness. I put it above mine and everything else that matters to me!”

“Nobody asked you to do that.” The man behind you mumbles, still bitter.

“Jisung!” You turn around to get a hold of his ear, which makes him complain loudly, pulling until he swats your hand away and you almost get into an argument of your own.

Yet, Chris isn’t impressed, not in the slightest. Your attention is captured by the loud sound of his chair rolling back, and as he stands up, the door opens, and Changbin returns, alone.

He freezes on the spot, the tension preventing him from advancing as he stares between the three of you with the biggest question mark above his head. Your best friend pays him no mind and instead addresses you one last time, eyes devoid of their usual spark.

“I’m done. Just do whatever you want, I don’t care anymore.”

With those simple words, Chris turns his back to you and walks out, not even bothering to close the door behind him or spare you another glance. Changbin looks torn between following him or staying put to hear the whole story, but eventually, he bolts after your friend, not caring about what either you or Jisung have to say.

All alone, you stare at each other, guilt eating at you from the inside. The gravity of the situation hits you both at the same time, like a punch to the face neither saw coming.

What have you done?

“Bug – “

You shake your head, putting a hand up to stop him from saying anything else.

Chris was the last person you wanted to hurt in this lifetime.

How could you have been so stupid?

How could you have ruined another one of your relationships?

[lockburn-castle]

love and a little motivation

synopsis in which yn needs just a little more motivation pairing nonidol!jeon wonwoo x gn!reader genre university au, fluff, comfort, wonwoo being wonwoo and giving reader the support they need warnings terms of endearment, talks about uni and grades (a little about law), jokes about dropping out, let me know if theres anything i missed word count 0.5k

notes: i started uni a month ago and honestly, commercial law has been kicking my ass lately so here's something i wrote about it HAHAHA i hope yall enjoy ! ꨄ

“Won, can we go home already?” you begged your boyfriend, leaning against his shoulder.

“No, yn. Hurry up and finish your work, then we’ll go home,” Wonwoo said, deadpanning as he continued to focus on his computer screen.

“But I can't concentrate anymore. The words are getting foggy and starting to swirl around,” you exaggerated, trying to appeal to his sympathy.

“Yn, you know that when we get home, you won’t touch your work. You’ve been doing so well this semester. Just a few more weeks, and we’ll be free, love,” he said, finally looking up at you with a reassuring smile.

Your grades had been steady throughout the semester, but with finals approaching, your motivation was slipping. To help keep you on track, Wonwoo had been bringing you to the library every day. He knew how much you dreaded studying, but he also knew that the thought of a bad grade was even worse.

“Wonwoo, how about I finish this worksheet and then we go home?” you tried to negotiate, but Wonwoo wasn’t budging.

“No, yn. Complete all the work your professors assigned, especially the one Mr. Kim gave you,” he insisted. He knew commercial law was your weakest subject — a class he was also taking, though he excelled in it.

“You know what? How about I drop out and start working part-time until you graduate and get your dream job? Then you can take care of me?” you joked, trying to lighten the mood.

Wonwoo looked at you and smiled. “I’d agree to that, but your parents wouldn’t be pleased, would they?” he teased. “Come on, you’ve rested enough. Finish up your work, and we can go.”

You pouted and turned back to your computer screen, your law textbook open to dense paragraphs about contract laws and the necessity of offer acceptance - something you seriously didn't understand.

Seeing you struggle, Wonwoo finally caved. “Okay, how about if you finish up your work, I’ll cook your favorite meal and run you a bath with your favorite bath bomb?”

At the promise of that reward, you looked at him with renewed energy. “Deal!” you quickly agreed, diving back into your work. There were still a few questions where you needed Wonwoo’s help, but at least you got everything done.

“Babe, I'm finally done!” you exclaimed a bit too loudly, drawing a few curious stares. You didn’t care in the slightest.

“Really?” Wonwoo asked, reviewing your work with a thorough glance. He looked up, impressed. “I’m proud of you, yn,” he said warmly.

“Couldn’t have done it without you,” you said with a smile, giving him a kiss on the cheek.

“Let’s go home, have dinner, and relax. You’ve earned it,” he said, standing up and packing away his things.

As you gathered your things, you turned to Wonwoo with a grin. “I can’t wait for your famous bibimbap. Could you make some naengmyeon too?” you asked hopefully.

“Sure, anything for you, love,” he replied, taking your hand as you both walked out of the library together, looking forward to a delicious meal and a relaxing evening.

[junnieverse]

VAMPIRE ➳ N. RIKI

➙ synopsis: the ever so loved and popular ni-ki, cherished and adored by everyone for his fame and popularity and yet here you were laughing bitterly at how naïve and blinded you were by him. he would tell you how much he loved you but it had already been too late before you realised how he used you to get where he was, draining everything in you like a vampire.

pairing: nishimura riki x afab!reader

genre: angst, lovers to exes au

word count: 1.8k

warnings: not proofread, reader crying, presence of rain/thunder, switch between calling him riki and ni-ki, presence of flashbacks from relationship with riki, mentions of alcohol and drinking, presence of manipulation & gaslighting

a/n: oh my goodness, it’s official, the series is finally finished after so long (this fic was collecting dust in my drafts). this really could’ve been done way before but from being caught up with school to going on hiatus and then uni, everything has just been too crazy to ever get to this but I finally made time in the middle of the night to complete it so i pat myself on the back for that :)

a/n (2): and lastly, thank you so much to all my readers who have supported this series since the very beginning! I do sometimes consider making a new series to celebrate 1k followers but i just don’t know if i have the time and energy to dedicate myself to doing that but maybe and hopefully one day. once again, thank you all sm for the tremendous love and support and i hope you all enjoy this one <33 [ REBLOGS HIGHLY APPRECIATED! ]

— GUTS X ENHYPEN SERIES MASTERLIST !

"Oh Ni-ki he's just so perfect and I wish he was my boyfriend.", "Ni-ki this and Ni-ki that" you say in a sickly girly voice before you huff with a roll of your eyes as you plopped down on your couch taking a sip of your wine.

It made you sick to your stomach having to see the one man you gave your all to living his best life as if he didn't ruin yours in the process of it all.

"Mr ‘cool guy’ huh..." you mumble under your breath as you look across the packed living room to the tall male who was currently wrapped up in conversation with a group of his friends. The music around you seemingly drowned out as you slowly twirled the drink around in your hand as you stared at the man, as if he could sense eyes were on him, his fell on yours and his signature smirk took over his face. Deciding to be bold for once in your life, you react by winking back to which he looks down with a small shake of his head chuckling.

Turning around making your way outside, the music sounding much more faint and the sound of the slight breeze instead hits your ears before a voice behind you catches your attention.

"I thought we had something going on in there, didn't expect you to leave our little game so quickly." the deep voice says as he leans against the door tilting his head to the side quietly scanning your outfit from top to bottom.

"I'm Riki, but you can just call me Ni-ki too since that's what people mostly refer to me as." he introduces himself quaintly with an outstretched hand.

"I'm (Y/n), nice to meet you Ni-ki." you reach your hand out to shake his but instead he kisses the back of it before looking up at you slowly with dark eyes.

You should've known from that moment on your entire life was going to change.

"This would be such a great opportunity, I can't miss this." your now boyfriend Riki mentions to you as he wraps his arms around your waist with a bright smile on his face as he told you about the producer one of his friends wanted to introduce to him at an event that would be happening later that night.

"But baby, you're meant to be meeting my parents tonight... don't you remember?" you say as you couldn't help the little pout on your lips.

"I know angel but Jake knows I've been talking about this guy for months now, it could help build my career a lot more too." he says as his cold hand gently stroked your cheek and he looked down at you with soft eyes trying to soften you and the always worked on you.

"Yeah no, you're right, I can't let you miss this, it's okay I'll just let my parents know you couldn't make it tonight." nodding your head in understanding and a forced smile before he leaned in for a quick peck on your lips.

"Thank you, I love you so much." Riki tells you looking at you like you were the most precious gem in the entire world making his heart swell.

It was moments like that you would think about from your relationship with Ni-ki that made you laugh bitterly at yourself, you felt like a complete idiot.

'Like a used wet fucking rag' you would sometimes describe it as.

You had reached a point in the break up where the sadness would just turn into anger and you would find yourself crying and screaming in frustration having only yourself to hold as you cried until there was no fight left in you.

"How could you do this to me Riki! I was the one who stood by your side the entire fucking time and now you're throwing it all away? Fuck you Nishimura Riki!" you yell out at the top of your lungs trying to be louder than the thunderstorm you were caught under outside your now ex's house as he turned his back to you walking back inside having just dumped you moments ago claiming "he wanted to focus on just his music" as if you hadn't caught a glimpse of the unfamiliar girl lurking behind his curtain peeking outside to witness the commotion.

"You need to leave, it's over between us." he says warningly turning back towards you looking at you with the same eyes you had fallen in love with, only this time you couldn't find any brightness behind them, only resentment and darkness.

You feel your legs give in as you fall on your knees wanting to roll yourself into a ball and just cry right there and then, "I HATE YOU!" mustering up the last words you could croak up choking on your words a slight bit as you spoke, the thunder rumbling in the distance.

Your heart felt so heavy in that moment, drenched by the heavy rain felt like nothing compared to the ache in your chest, your tears just mixing with the rain as you stayed there for a few more seconds before getting up and getting into your car getting the seat and carpet wet but you were far too upset to care in that moment.

Leaning your head on the steering wheel, you close your eyes as you silently listened to your heavy breathing and the harsh rains outside processing what had just transpired a few minutes ago.

It was all so baffling to you and yet the longer you thought about it and processed the break up, the more everything between you both started making sense and your hindsight truly was 20/20.

You were a fool, you really were!

Because how was it multiple people warned you about him and how he was "bad news" and yet you still chose his words over theirs, over people who simply wanted to warn you from experience and even your own friends.

"I was going to the bar to order a drink and this one girl came up to me claiming to be your ex suddenly just told me to be careful of you or something. She seemed incredibly concerned though..." you explain to Riki as you took a seat in his lap whilst he took a sip of his own drink but soon pausing and raising a brow at your words and you notice his jaw clenching.

"Don't listen to her, she was probably someone from my past who's just butthurt that I rejected them. Just ignore them, people will say anything to try and make me look bad to try and ruin my reputation. They’re all crazy…"

You knew that after one too many people started saying the same thing about how bad of an influence he was that it was a sign, but it's as if there was also a small fucked up part of you that was enticed and thrilled by how dysfunctional everything was.

The signs of gaslighting and manipulation were all there the whole time but you somehow couldn't bring yourself to fully let go, like it was paralysing and addicting, he was your drug.

No matter how many times you would sleep beside him, be under him, felt his fiery touch around your waist as he kissed you, you truly couldn't wrap your head around what effect Ni-ki had on you.

Placing your wine down on the coffee table in front of you, you let out a bitter laugh as you come across Riki's latest Instagram post with his latest "connection magnet" or in simpler terms, girlfriend, celebrating their anniversary together.

"Happy anniversary baby, I love you so much. Tch, as if you even have a heart to know what love is." you mumble the last part to yourself rolling your eyes throwing your phone to the side as you get up heading to your bathroom.

rummaging through the trash you find the crumpled up photobooth picture of you and Riki kissing before grabbing your lighter in one of your drawers and setting the picture alight and watching it burn to smithers in your sink feeling apathetic at the scene.

Your love alone was not enough to keep him beside you, and you had nothing more to offer him other than being a trophy beside him whenever he wanted to go out and someone who could easily help him get connections, that's all it ever was.

Coming to realise that all those times he told you that he loved you were just empty words he uttered to make you feel something only made you feel more naïve and a victim to his sick games.

"W-what what… why are you looking at me like that?" stuttering softly before peering up at Riki who already had his gaze on you as you wrapped yourselves in the warm blankets as you cuddled on your couch watching a movie together as a small date indoors.

"Nothing, I just... I love you that's all." he whispers softly kissing your nose pulling you in closer to his chest making your cheeks heat up at the sudden confession and affection which wasn't very common for him to do.

And yet that was another memory you wish you could burn as quickly as the picture since it meant nothing to him after all.

Just how easy was it for him to lie without even flinching, to so easily tell you exactly what you wanted to hear and not feel any guilt after that, you didn't understand it.

"I just feel so... so vulnerable right now. Lost, confused... used." you let out a deep breath as you shake your head blinking back hot tears trying your hardest to not get emotional.

"I mean hell I know I met him at a party but I didn't think that's all it ever was. All that ever mattered to him was who was attending these parties and how far this person could get him in his career. To Ni-ki... if you couldn't serve any purpose to his social standing, you weren't worth his time." briefly explaining the mind of your manipulative ex to one of your friends as you both cooked dinner over at her house.

Not having been paying as much attention to the onions you were cutting as your mind strayed far away to other distracting thoughts, the knife slipped past your finger a bit too close cutting you. instinctively you couldn't help but to swear under your breath before rushing to the sink to try and slow down the bleeding.

"And when he thinks you are of use, he'll just suck your blood like a fucking vampire until there's nothing left in you." the words fall past your lips mindlessly as you watch the red liquid drip down your finger.

[corpsekiller]

𝐢 𝐠𝐞𝐭 𝐦𝐞𝐚𝐧 𝐰𝐡𝐞𝐧 𝐢'𝐦 𝐧𝐞𝐫𝐯𝐨𝐮𝐬 (𝐥𝐢𝐤𝐞 𝐚 𝐛𝐚𝐝 𝐝𝐨𝐠) — 𝐤.𝐛𝐚𝐤𝐮𝐠𝐨𝐮

PAIRING. katsuki bakugou x genderneutral!reader

WARNINGS. hurt/comfort, overuse of quirk, mentions of burns

SYNOPSIS. after pushing himself beyond his limits during training, katsuki tries to deal with the consequences of his actions on his own.

AUTHOR'S NOTE. so, i'm finally back after taking a long break from writing! i honestly didn't plan to disappear without a word, but uni and work were keeping me really busy and i just didn't find the time to write. anyway, i hope you enjoy this little fic! <3

LENGTH. will be added later!

MASTERLIST

Everything fuckin' hurts.

His skin is reddened and the palms are blistered, aching and tender to the touch as he fumbles with the first-aid kit, rummaging through the small bag for some bandages to cover his open wounds. The cold water he ran over his sore fingers did little to soothe the pain and Bakugou swallows a broken sob when he finds nothing to stop the cuts from bleeding, tries to blink away the tears that begin to blur his vision as he tosses the first-aid kit across the room and slides down the wall to his knees.

"Katsu, are you in there?"

Your voice makes him flinch. It's muffled behind the closed door, barely audible, but he can still hear the honest concern laced in every word as you call out his name a second time. His heart stumbles in his chest, a treacherous rhythm behind his ribs that begs for help and yet, he can't bring himself to reply no matter how hard he tries — his lips part, but instead of words he finds stones in the hollow of his mouth.

No sound leaves his throat.

You're so pathetic, a voice whispers. It sounds strangely like his own.

For a second, Katsuki stares at the sickeningly white tiles beneath his feet, now stained with the remnants of his blood still oozing from his hand. Deep crimson glints tauntingly back at him, the bitter affirmation of his failure to control his explosive quirk reflecting in each little drop and fuck, he feels another sob shatter his body before he can clasp his bruised hands over his mouth — it makes him want to claw right through his chest, to grab his weakness right by the fuckin' throat and twist its brittle neck to silence it for the rest of his life.

He can't.

"Fuck off," he manages to bark around the stones and buries his face in the crook of his elbow, presses his nose into the sleeve of his of his shirt to suffocate this awful desperation that threatens to climb out his throat. "I'm fine, okay? I don't need your fuckin' help."

It's dreadfully quiet on the other side of the door.

Katsuki's breath hitches in his chest and he listens, counts the seconds — one, two, three, four — but besides the sound of his own thoughts roaring in his head, he can't hear anything else and the realization that tumbles down with this observation feels like a knife being pushed slowly into his flesh.

You left, he thinks bitterly, he finally pushed you away like everyone else. And look, he gets it — for the longest time, that's all he's ever done; shoving people away and hiding behind a carefully constructed facade of unbridled anger. He's only every held out his hands to destroy, to crush and win and maybe now, his actions finally return to haunt him in his weakest moment.

It doesn't matter that he caught a glimpse of hope when he first met you, that he thought he finally found someone who'd only laugh at his harsh comments and tell him to calm down, I know you don't mean it with an amused smile—

You left anyway, he reminds himself. It's probably for the best.

Then, a sigh.

"You're so stupid," you retort on the other side of the door, though there's no bite in your insult. "I know you can handle yourself, but I'm not leaving you in this state, even if I have to sit here all night."

Your voice cracks and his name lingers on the tip of your tongue, sweet and soft, never falling from your lips. "C'mon, let me in."

Instinctively, he gives in.

"Alright," Bakugou replies hesitantly. "Come in, but don't... Just don't fuckin' laugh at me, alright." It's a pathetic attempt to hide the pain behind a mask of unjustified anger, he knows, but he can't let you see him like this without putting up a miserable fight. It feels like he's been stripped of any dignity he's been feigning to hold on the span of his broad shoulders, like he's been reduced to nothing but an incurable ache that clings to his broad shoulders like a shadow under the scorching midday sun.

He's not even sure you heard him, words barely above a whisper, but then the door opens and you enter. With careful steps, you come closer and crouch down, your knees hitting the cold tiles with a soft thud. Immediately, Katsuki slumps against the wall, caving his shoulders into himself to escape your eyes studying his face, gaze wandering over his features as your brows crease in worry.

He hates it.

And yet, he doesn't move when you wordlessly wrap your hands around his wrists and gently turn them to observe the burns littering his bruised skin. There's a certain kind of caution in the way you touch him, something so utterly gentle, as if you're fuckin' scared of hurting him and Bakugou curses your stupid display of affection — no one ever handled him with such care before.

So, he grits his teeth and tears his gaze away from you. It's just too much, the way you look at him.

"Y'know, you shouldn't push yourself like that."

He almost barks out a laugh. The sharpness of a cynical retort burns on the tip of his tongue and he opens his mouth to spit it out, but you're quick to cut him off.

"Shut the fuck up for a second, 'kay?" It's almost as if you expected him to argue. "Listen, I get it. I really do. I know why you always push yourself in every training session until you're about to pass about, why you always strive for perfection and overexert your quirk, but this... on the long run, this will only lead you to your early grave."

"You don't know shit," he snarls. Like a wounded animal, he fears kindness, yet he craves it. Touching you makes him want to pull away and yet, he stays frozen, unable to move, because the moment you let go he's sure the pain of his burns will pull him back into the abyss he's been fighting his way out of for what feels like an eternity and he—

He can't give up now.

So instead, he just studies your expression — thoughtful, gentle, concerned. He feels his face heat up as his fingers tremble in your gentle grasp, itching with the urge to fumble with something, anything in means of distraction. He doesn't mind the lack of space — in fact, he finds it almost soothing to feel how close you are, but he's so vulnerable beneath your eyes that his mind screams at him to run if it means you won't look at him in this way again.

"I'm not judging you, Katsu," you mumble, sensing his unease. Your thumb draws small circles on the inside of his wrist, right where his pulse flutters beneath his skin. "But even the best of us need a break every once in a while. It's not a sign of weakness to ask for help, really."

Somehow, his shoulders relax.

"No one will judge you, I promise. So why don't we head to the nurse and let her take a look at your burns?"

It is almost instinctively that he desires to lean into your gentle touch, and remember this fragile feeling for the rest of his life — Katsuki finds a different kind of healing, now that he lets his walls crumble down in your embrace.

"Okay," he whispers and shakily pushes himself to his feet.

[drdemonprince]

don’t know if this is relevant to your ask box, but I thought you might find it interesting.

I’m a 20 yr old trans man who’s just started an ongoing thing with a new Dom, who is over twice my age. I’m currently finishing up my second year at uni, and he’s, you guessed it, also the, uh…. academic sort.

He’s a busy guy so obviously we can only meet up every once and a while, but we text almost every day. From the beginning he was always curious about my school endeavours, but recently it’s become more of a thing.

He won’t let us meet until certain assignments are done. He’s flexible and understanding, like any good dom, but holy shit this man had me at a cafe for ten hours on 40mg of vyvanse writing my final essay like my life depended on it. I didn’t even know who I was, motivated by the pure need to please and, quite frankly, desperate desire to be absolutely taken and used. This man has “cured” my ADHD (not really, but damn well is he fucking helping it).

I think the point I’m getting at here it that I can’t believe it took the motivation of my D/s relationship to get me to get shit done. Like, I’m done DAYS before the deadline for things I usually would have left last minute. I’ve been honest with my struggles with motivation and difficulties taking care of myself, and he is genuinely invested in my well-being so I know it all comes from a place of care and respect.

At the moment I’m working on my final short film for a class, and he told me to make a list of all the foley sounds I thought would help drive the narrative (he knows I love making lists, it’s also the autism), and as probably one of the best rewards for my good behaviour, he shared with me a collection of audio files (he dabbles in audio mixing) that were relevant to the list I shared. Can you believe this??!!

All these studentxprof fics are getting it wrong. Sometimes nothing comes between a teacher’s genuinely investment in student learning (if they enjoy what they do, like he does) and that is absolutely true in this case. Absolutely unbelievable this is my life right now. Would love to hear your thoughts on this!

This sounds so fucking sweet and HOT anon! I'm so glad you're having an exciting time with an older dom who cares about you and helps you meet your goals! And the phrasing of this guy making you write for hours on vyvanse is especially titilating...making it sound like an intox scene omg drool

ADHDers are generally very socially motivated, which is not rare for human beings at all. It makes sense that having the external structure that an outside observe can provide and the sense that your actions actually matter to other people and that people care about you would help facilitate you focusing on shit and getting organized! Not to mention how much fuckin easier it is to perform any kind of household task or bit of drudgery once it becomes sexual service. Shit gives boring regular life a charge of excitement, and the abdication of power gives you the discipline to actually follow through, because you're not the only one on the hook for everything and that's less scary!

I have nothing much more to say other than this rules and I hope you keep having a fun time!

[asterifish]

Hello~~

Can i request a NCT Yuta who is a dom top with a bottom reader with a huge ego where Yuta basically not only humbles but feminize and makes the reader submit to him with his cock

Hi hi hello! Ty for requesting!!

I think I've done smth like this with a diff member, so I hope this one doesn't turn out the same 🙏

Hope you enjoy!

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You're a mess.

M/n was pretty popular in college. NCT Uni was pretty well known, which is why more people knew m/n. But what most don't know is that m/n has a boyfriend. A really protective boyfriend.

Yuta Nakamoto was a Dance major, a good one at that. He does a lot of shows with his class, NCT 127, and they usually travel all over Korea for it. When m/n and Yuta started daring, Yuta didn't take m/n with him, because he didn't know how m/n would act backstage without him.

A few weeks after Yuta decided that m/n was trustworthy, he invited m/n to one of their venues. M/n agreed, happy that he was finally allowed to go with his boyfriend.

The morning of, m/n woke up alone. He assumed that Yuta had gone to the venue with his class, and got ready per usual. The time of the performance came around, so m/n finally headed to the building. Meeting Yuta outside, they exchanged a quick kiss before Yuta let m/n backstage.

"Behave, m/n." Were Yuta's last words before he headed onstage.

Every time Yuta risked a glance backstage, m/n wasn't looking. He was offtalking to se staff member, or looking at himself in his pocket mirror, or on his phone. Most of the time, m/n was talking to a staff member, flaunting his outfit or seemingly flirting with staff.

Fast forward (by SOMI) to after the performance, Yuta was furious. Beyond furious. He wouldn't talk to. M/n the whole way back to their shared apartment. He went straight to the shower and didnt come out until an hour later.

"Yuta, hun, are you okay? You havent been talking to me at all since your performance." M/n tapped his boyfriend, but got shrugged off.

Yuta continued to ignore m/n until 2 hours later. "Yuyu.... Please talk to me. Whatever I did im sorry..."

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A few minutes later, M/n was underneath Yuta. He was gripping the bedsheets so hard his knuckles turned white. He was currently being spread open and eaten out. His legs were twitching, and he was moaning really loudly, lost in extacy. "You think you're so oretty, huh? I'll show you.. " Yuta flipped m/n over so he was on all fours before continuin, "...just how pretty you are. You dont need..." Yuta paused again and slapped m/n's ass. "..other people to tell you that... I can prove it to you myself."

Minutes later, Yuta was gripping m/n's waist, grunting ans he slammed in and out of the smaller. Yuta was groaning compliments to m/n, calling him a princess, and the prettiest girl im the whole world.

"Fuck baby... Your cunt is just sucking me in.. Ngh~" Yuta slapped m/n's ass harshly, earning a moan out of the smaller. They kept at this until m/n was begging for forgiveness, with three loads of cum in him.

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Hey!! Sorry this was cut short, ppl keep looking over my shoulder on the bus 😭😭😭

Also!! Heads up guys! Most of my fics will be non idol au unless specified :)

Works belong to @asterifish | reblogs help me a lot!

2023 | © @asterifish

[blackgirlwhowrites2k23]

Heya! Can I pleaseee get a Balde one where he comes to visit you unexpectedly in your uni dorm or flat and you have to try your best to hide him 🥲🫶

Summary: “When I dialed 6-1-1, Repair Service

She said, "Hello, may I help you please?"

I told her something must be wrong with my phone

'Cause my baby wouldn't hang up on me”

You’ve been caught up with preparations for your exams and you’ve put your phone on DND. You told your parents but you forgot to tell a certain someone. 

A/N: Thank you for the requests! More Balde is on the way !!! This one's also about 2,300 words which is more than I've written for the others so enjoy!

It was nearing midnight and your dorm room was shrouded in the dim glow of a desk lamp. The air was a mix of the vanilla-scented candle you'd lit (because who said studying couldn't have a hint of vanilla-scented goodness?), the heavy weight of late-night cramming that threatened to make you fall asleep, and the unmistakable anxiety that hung thick around these times. You were buried in textbooks and notes, fully immersed in the world of exam preparation; it was like a battlefield, and each page you turned was a strategic move. Your desk was a war room, scattered with the casualties of highlighters and sticky notes. With a crucial test looming on the horizon, you had put your phone on "Do Not Disturb" mode all day in hopes of getting all your work done and fully being prepared for your upcoming finals. With your notifications silenced, the only sounds that reverberated through your dorm were the rustling of papers and the occasionally frustrated sigh that came from the depths of your soul and empty stomach.

You had made sure to inform your parents about your temporary digital escape, not wanting them to worry and assume something bad had happened–knowing them. Thoughts of a time when they'd practically filed a missing person report because you forgot to text back for a few hours came to the surface causing a soft smile to grace your features. You were glad you had people who worried about you. Speaking of people who worried about you, you had kinda forgotten to clue in a certain someone—Alejandro, your boyfriend. With a big game on the horizon for the star football player, the anticipation was probably cranking up his stress levels so you decided it best to let him be fully focused anyway. He’ll forgive you. You chuckled at the mental image of him panicking after receiving a missing person report from your parents after you two had spent the whole day together laughing and catching up.

As the clock ticked past midnight, you were in the trenches; engrossed in your notes, oblivious to the multiple missed calls and messages from Alejandro. 

Outside your door, there was a soft melody that was almost like a distant echo, barely audible at first but gradually growing louder with each passing second. The muffled thumping of heavy bass reached your ears, accompanied by a tantalizing melody that teased the edges of your memory. You definitely knew the song, but it was so muffled that you couldn’t quite catch the words. It was the kind of tune that, under normal circumstances, would have lured you out to join the invisible party or belt out whatever lyrics were being played in the hallway.

However, irritation crawled under your skin as the music continued to infiltrate your room. At first, you tried to brush it off, but the irritation morphed into a gnawing frustration, and you felt an almost growing urge to do something about it. The fantasy of storming out into the hallway to confront the culprit played out in your mind. You imagined yourself going out there and asking if they were “out of their damn mind” and to “turn that noise down” or maybe taking the polite route and requesting to turn it down, which would be a remarkable level of self-control. Or maybe doing a little bit of both.

With a sigh and a reluctant shake of your head, you decided that enough was enough. It was time to restore the peace. Taking a deep breath, you steeled yourself for the confrontation ahead. Whether through a polite request or a no-nonsense intervention, you were not going to fail this test because you were too busy turning up to your dorm neighbor’s music.

You swung the door open, ready to give a piece of your mind, only to be met with the sight of Alejandro, a mischievous grin on his face, holding a portable speaker playing the soulful tune. Confusion flickered across your face, but before you could react, he grabbed your hand, pulled you into the hallway, and began to dance and sing.

"What in the world, Alej!? Boy, do you mind explaining why you're playing music outside my door at this ungodly hour?" you asked in a sort of hushed shout as a mix of irritation and amusement was in your tone as you crossed your hands across your frame.

He grabbed your hands again and twirled you in a spontaneous dance move, still singing, "Mr. Telephone Man, there's something wrong with my line. When I dial my baby's number, I get a click every time!"

You couldn't help but laugh at the unexpected serenade, even as your irritation lingered. "Seriously, though, what are you doing here?"

He flashed you a playful smile and continued to sing, "Mr. Telephone Man, there's something wrong with my line. When I dial my baby's number, I get a click every time!"

Your confusion deepened, and you shot him a bemused look. "Be forreal, is this some kind of weird initiation prank or...?"

With a twirl and a flourish, he sang the next line, "When I dialed 6-1-1, Repair Service

She said, "Hello, may I help you please?"

I told her something must be wrong with my phone

'Cause my baby wouldn't hang up on me!"

It finally clicks. You couldn't decide whether to be annoyed or amused. "Okay, wow. You are petty."

He finally paused his impromptu performance, looking at you with a mischievous glint in his eyes. "Just thought I'd drop by since my baby doesn’t know how to answer the phone. I thought I’d add a little musical magic to your study night and bless you with my singing skills. You know, since I’m you’re good luck charm."

“I thought I was your good luck charm,” you raised an eyebrow, caught between a sly smirk and a reluctant smile. " And I thought you had a match coming up, so I thought I’d let you focus. I didn’t want to be a bother.” 

“We’re each other’s lucky charms.” He chuckled before he placed both his arms firmly on your shoulders as his face got serious, "And you’re never a bother. Don’t let me hear you say that again or you’ll hurt my feelings, man."

You couldn't help but shake your head in disbelief as you waved him off. "You could've just knocked, you know."

"But where's the fun in that?" he replied, starting to dance again. "Mr. Telephone Man, there's something wrong with my line..."

You sighed, unable to suppress a smile. "Alright, fine. You win. But let’s bring this inside. If anyone sees you making all this noise they’ll be on my head. People are trying to study."

With that, he pulled you into your dorm, the catchy tune of "Mr. Telephone Man" playing lightly and serving as a great backdrop. It was unexpected, ridiculous, and utterly Alejandro. You couldn't deny the warmth spreading through you as you joined him in the spontaneous dance, grateful for the interruption. Your initial annoyance melted away into laughter as he picked you up and twirled you around, still belting out the lyrics with an endearing off-key charm. The unexpected serenade had you in stitches, and you couldn't help but marvel at the lengths he went to surprise you.

“Oh, wait. I almost forgot.”

He put you down and darted back outside. You stood there, a mix of emotions swirling within, wondering if he was leaving. However, to your surprise, he returned moments later, holding a bouquet of your favorite flowers and a gift basket filled with snacks, comfort food, and a selection of your favorite movies.

As you peered into the gift basket, a grin spread across your face. "What's all this, babe?"

He chuckled, reaching for a snack. "Just a little something to make sure you're fueled up and relaxed for your big day. I’m also hungry though so some of these are for now."

You picked up a kisses chocolate bar and raised an eyebrow at the note attached. "Kisses for good luck?" you read aloud, a playful groan escaping your lips. "Alejandro, you're so corny."

He grinned, teasingly nudging you. "You secretly love my corniness."

You bit back a smile, holding up a Tootsie Roll with a note that read, "You'll do great, toots." "This is quite literally the corniest thing ever," you teased, groaning in affection.

He laughed, "Admit it, you love it."

You attempted to deny it with a nonchalant shrug, but the smile tugging at your lips betrayed you. "Maybe a little."

His eyes twinkled with amusement. "That smile says otherwise."

You rolled your eyes playfully, but couldn't hide the affection in your gaze. "Okay, fine. Maybe a lot."

He leaned in, planting a sweet kiss on your forehead. "That's what I thought."

The gesture left you speechless, and your eyes glistened with tears of joy. Alejandro noticed your tears and immediately grew concerned, reaching out to wipe them away. As you explained the mix of emotions that overwhelmed you, he responded with a snort, teasingly flicking your forehead and calling you a crybaby.

The music still lightly played from the speaker, and just when you thought the night couldn't get any crazier, there was a knock on the door. Your eyes quickly went over to your digital clock that read 1:30 am. Shit. A whole 30 minutes since visitation hours ended. Panic flashed across both your faces as you hastily tried to hide Alejandro. His attempts at concealment were comical at best—behind curtains, under blankets, and even suggesting he'd hide behind the door. You couldn't help but stifle a laugh at his antics.

"Hurry up, Balde! Behind the door? Seriously?" you whispered, trying to keep your voice low while conveying the urgency of the situation.

He shot you a sheepish grin, "Hey, it could work!"

You rolled your eyes, "Not a chance. Get in the closet!"

The knock persisted, and you shot a quick look at Alejandro. With a dramatic flourish, he threw himself into the closet, making you cringe at the potential noise. You shushed him with wide eyes, "Quiet! We're going to get caught."

He hushed back with an exaggerated whisper, "I'm Miles Morales, silent and stealthy."

You bit your lip to suppress a giggle. "More like Alejandro Balde. Loud as hell and clumsy. Just stay quiet!"

As you tried to rearrange the room to look somewhat normal, Alejandro couldn't resist making a joke, "If they ask, you’re going to try out for the cheer team and I was helping you practice."

You shot him a glare and pressed a hand to your lips. He returned the gesture as you closed the closet door. 

The knock on the door grew more insistent, and you quickly continued to shuffle around, trying to make everything look as normal as possible. You shot one last glance at the closet, silently praying that Alejandro could keep quiet.

You quickly adjusted yourself, doing your best to look casual as you opened the door. The RA, a stern-looking figure with a perpetual fake customer service smile, squinted suspiciously.

"Everything okay in here?"

“Hey, girl. Hey.” Real smooth. You put on your best innocent smile, "Yeah, just studying and things of that nature."

She raised an eyebrow, glancing around the room. Her eyebrows lift in appreciation as she hears the music. "Ooh, I love this song. But, don’t keep the music up too loud it’s late."

You nodded, "Of course."

She squinted, looking at the closet. Panic bubbled up inside you as she took a step closer, and you desperately tried to divert her attention.

"So, how's your night going, girlll? Any exciting plans?" you asked, hoping to steer the conversation away from the closet.

She tilted her head, seemingly amused, "Just making my rounds, you know. Checking up on everyone. I caught some people trying to sneak people in past visitation hours so I had to do a sweep of the floor."

Your neck began to get hot as you played along. “Oh wow, who would do something like that.” 

You tried to divert her attention, but she wasn't easily swayed. With a raised eyebrow, she approached the closet, and your heart raced. As she opened the door, you closed your eyes, readying yourself for an explanation.

To your surprise, she closed the door without a word, patting you on the shoulder and bidding you goodnight. Bewilderment washed over you as you rushed over into the closet, only to find it empty. You furrowed your brow in confusion, searching around.

“You need help finding something, ma’am.”

You turned to him, a mix of relief and confusion on your face. "How did you...?"

He winked, his voice barely above a whisper, "I can turn invisible, remember?"

You chuckled softly, rolling your eyes. "You're something else, Alejandro."

He laughed, "Well, we didn't get caught, did we? Now, I can think of something else we can be doing..."

You giggled but waved to him, "Uh Uh, none of that. These walls are super thin."

He pouted, "You're no fun."

You shot him a playful glare, "Says the guy who tried to hide behind the door."

He chuckled, "Fair point. But you have to admit, I added a bit of excitement to your study night."

You playfully rolled your eyes, "Yeah, yeah, Mr. Telephone Man. Let's just hope we don't get another surprise visit."

You spent the rest of the night watching movies, eating snacks, having fun, and cozying up next to someone you knew would always worry about you when you needed him to.

[lucy90712]

Can you do a Jude Bellingham imagine where his girlfriend is very burnt out from school. They do long distance so she tries to get everything done so she can go spend time with him & watch him play. One day when she lands to watch him play against Barcelona he finds her stress crying in the room alone because she tries to be there for everyone around her but it’s costing her to stress out about getting things in on time. Somehow Jude calms her & they enjoy their day before he plays against Barcelona.

Thank you

-a very stressed & burnt out student

A/n: this is me right now too, I hope things get easier for you soon

WC: 2.0k The last few weeks maybe even months have been so stressful. Ever since I went back to university I have done nothing but go to classes and study. I know it's my final year but I didn't think it would be this difficult but there is just so much to do between assignments for classes and preparations for my dissertation. For the first few weeks I feel like I was coping pretty well but recently it's all just hit me like a truck and now I feel like I'm drowning in books and being suffocated by deadlines. 

To make it all 100 times worse where I chose to go to uni is away from my family and very far from my boyfriend. Don't get me wrong I love it here but at times like this I just wish that I had someone here to tell me it's all going to be ok. I've been really missing not just my family but my boyfriend Jude as well, I haven't seen Jude since before I came back to uni which was at the end of august and it's been killing me. I also haven't been able to talk to him as much as I would like as I've been really busy and he's been busy too with his move to Real Madrid and having to get used to living and playing over there. 

These last few months have been hard on our relationship, even though we've been long distance for a few years now we have never gone this long without seeing each other and the fact that we haven't talked as much hasn't helped. Finally we are going to see each other though as I'm flying over to see him play and just to spend a few days with him which has got me through the last few days. In order to be able to go and see Jude I have been working extra hard to get my work done as I want to actually spend time with him which I can't do if I have assignments to do but it's been difficult. All week I've only left my apartment to go to classes and I've pulled far too many all nighters but I've got quite a lot done so I guess it's somewhat worth it although I still have some things to do. 

I had an alarm set to wake me up before my flight but it wasn't needed as I'd been awake all night packing and doing uni work. The worst part was despite all my hard work I had to pack a few of my textbooks and my laptop as I didn't manage to finish everything in time. I tried to put that behind me though as I got to the airport because I still want to enjoy my time with Jude and if I'm stressed and feeling down then I'm not going to make the most of the time which I really do want to do. Jude has been telling me all week how much he's been looking forward to today he promised me that we was going to get up early to pick me up from the airport before he has to go to training which is how I know he's serious as he hates getting up in the morning. 

~~~~~~~~~~

After a few hours in the air I landed on Spanish soil and somehow I immediately felt a bit more relaxed as I knew it was only a matter of time until I would be in Jude's arms which is exactly what I need. As I got off the plane I text Jude to let him know I had landed which he answered right away telling me he was already waiting for me in the arrivals lounge with a disguise on so he didn't get recognised. Knowing he was waiting for me made me walk a bit quicker to collect my bag and once it was in sight I grabbed it and ran towards where Jude would be waiting for me. 

It took me a minute to find Jude but eventually I saw him stood with a hat and sunglasses on which didn't offer much of a disguise but he wasn't surrounded by people so clearly it does something. Once he saw me coming he swiftly made his way over until he was close enough to pick me up and nearly kill me with how tightly he held me. It felt so good to be in his arms again and smell his cologne it made me feel like I was home again which is exactly what I've been needing. Jude held onto me for a good while before he took my bag in one hand and my hand in the other leading me out to his car which was parked outside. Once we got in the car Jude leaned straight over the centre console and smashed his lips onto mine which led to us making out for a bit too long so we had to rush back to Jude's place on he could drop me off before going to his training session. 

Once Jude had left I went and made myself some breakfast as I didn't have time to eat before I left and I had to make myself a cup of tea because despite being in Spain I'm still British and we can't go a day without a cup of tea. Jude knows me well enough that he had brought a new pack of my favourite tea and put it on a shelf he knows I can reach along with a mug which he had clearly just brought for me. I enjoyed my cup of tea before I took my bag upstairs to go and unpack. To my surprise the room was quite clean and Jude had cleaned out one of his draws for me, well not quite there was a few hoodies and t shirts in there still but he left me a note telling me I can wear them so they are mine now. Of course I had to put a hoodie on before starting to unpack all of my stuff. 

I unpacked most of my stuff pretty quickly but then I got to the bottom of my suitcase and saw just how many text books and folders I had to pack. Seeing it made the realisation hit me that I still have so much work to do and once again all of the stresses started weighing down on me like it was physically crushing me. All week I've been so deep into work mode I bottled up all my emotions but now they are all coming out at once and for some reason I can't stop crying. It's like all of the pressure and stress has finally reached the surface and the mental breakdown all my friends warned was coming has finally arrived. I've never felt so overwhelmed in my life and I just don't know how to cope all I do know is that I need to get myself together before Jude gets back as I don't want to worry him plus I want to enjoy our time together. 

My attempts to calm myself down didn't go well if anything I just got more overwhelmed and cried more. I was so in my own world that I completely lost track of time so when I heard the front door close and Jude call my name I panicked. As his footsteps got closer to the bedroom I desperately tried to wipe the tears from my face but then I realised my eyes would still be all red so I just put the hood on the hoodie up to try and cover my face.

"Hi darling do you need any help unpacking?" Jude asked a he walked in 

"N-no I'm f-fine" I sniffled

"Babe what's wrong?" He asked clearly concerned 

"Nothing" I said 

"I know you're lying to me I can hear you sniffling what's made you so upset you know you can tell me anything" he said trying to make me open up

"I'm sorry I'm just stressed I've got so much work to do for uni I worked so hard all week so we could actually spend some time together but I couldn't finish everything and now I have loads of texts books in my suitcase and I'm just feeling a bit overwhelmed I'm really sorry I'm ruining our time together" I rambled 

"Hey hey slow down it's ok there's no need to be sorry it's ok tell me exactly what's going on and we can fix it together" Jude comforted 

"I still have two assignments I need to finish before the end of the week and I'm so exhausted from pulling so many all nighters but I just want to actually spend some time with you because I've really missed you" I said a bit more calmly this time 

"Ok we can work this out I know you're tired but how about I help you finish those assignments then we can just have a relaxing evening together get some sleep and be ready to do something together tomorrow" Jude suggested 

"That sounds good" I said 

Jude then picked me up and sat me on his bed before grabbing my laptop and books for me. I explained to him what I needed to do and then we go to work together. One of my assignments I just needed to reread so Jude did that for me to make sure there were no mistakes then I just needed to finish one other assignment and then do the same. Jude was so helpful and read the parts of my textbooks I needed to me while I typed and he let me talk through my ideas with him even though he doesn't understand what I'm studying. In just over and hour we were done and I instantly felt so much better and when Jude started giving me kisses I felt even better. 

 Being the amazing boyfriend that he is Jude got some chocolate from downstairs for me to eat while he ran a bath for the both of us to share. It was only when Jude came to ask me which bubble bath I prefer that I realised just how much he had brought for my visit. He doesn’t like to take baths so he wouldn’t have bubble bath just lying around and the chocolate I was eating was my favourite one so he must’ve got that especially for me as well. Jude is such a sweet boyfriend all the time but little things like this just make me realise how truly perfect he is and it makes me so grateful that I ended up with Jude as I know he truly cares for me. 

Once the bath was ready Jude helped me get in then he got in himself and sat behind me letting me rest my back against his chest. The entire atmosphere was so relaxing which helped me finally let go of all the stress and anxiety that has been fuelling me for the last few weeks. Nothing needed to be said either both of us were more than content just sitting there in silence as Jude’s fingers played with the rings on my hand especially the promise ring which he gave me last Valentine’s Day which I think is my favourite piece of jewellery I own. After a while of just relaxing Jude started to wash my body for me which meant I didn’t have to move at all as his hands gently rubbed over my skin. 

Once the both of us were clean we got out the bath and Jude gave me some of his clothes for me to put on which I very happily did. He then picked me up and carried me downstairs to the sofa where he piled blankets on top of me before sitting down and spreading them out properly. All of the sudden I felt the tiredness take over so I snuggled up to Jude and just let my eyes close and sleep consume me. Just as I was drifting off I felt Jude kiss the top of my head and whisper I love you which put a smile on my face just as I went into a dreamland. 

[hawks-feathers]

Hello! I hope you’re having a good day. I was wondering if you could write headcannons for Tamaki Amajiki x reader? I was thinking that the reader is a librarian because she loves books so much, all types of books. Basically Tamaki Amajiki x bookworm reader. I understand if you’re unable to do this or get to this right away. Motivation can be hard. I get that. Don’t be afraid to take your time. Please and thank you! Have a wonderful evening!

Yes yes! Im so sorry about the super long wait. and thank you for being so understanding <3

Pairings : Tamaki Amajiki X fem! Bookworm reader

Warnings : None

Tamaki x Bookworm reader headcanons 

You got into UA because of your written test score, you honestly aren't expecting to be a hero however UA in general is a prestigious school so you decided to try and get into it since it would making getting into Uni easier.

almost always after class got out you’d sit in the library, do your homework there, read or even help the librarian. the atmosphere of the library just really comforted you.

 occasionally, you'd see a purple haired boy in the library. Maybe once or twice a month. Sometimes, he had a hero costume on also, so you assumed the reason you didn't know him was because he was in the hero course.

On the day you finally got to talk to him you were actually struggling to reach a shelf to put a book back and the step stool was no where to be seen. "Hello, sorry to bother you. But can you reach something for me?" You ask the purple haired boy. That's where it all started

After that day, you noticed he started showing up to the library a lot more often than he used to.

It was a slow burn, but after that day, you would catch him taking quick glances at you and blushing heavily after he realized he'd been caught.

You decided to make small efforts to sit closer to him and eventually he returned the favor.

You guys mostly just sat together. Enjoying each other presence. Not much talking to be done and he genuinely appreciates that.

"Hey ... uh Im struggling in this one class.... maybe you can come over and help me.. study?"

Like I said earlier, it's a slow burn, but he does get the courage to ask you out. With the help of a certain blue haired friend.

Honestly a lot of your times spent just enjoying each other's company in silence. It was peaceful to him. He would watch you read. Eyes lingering on your lips. Sometimes asking you questions about your current book

As you guys got more serious he would secretly read the books with you so he had more to talk about. You picked up on it almost immediately but didn't mention it.

He wasn't big in physical touch. His love language was gift giving. He'd buy you new books every so often with a "I saw this, and I thought of you, I hope you haven't read it yet"

The first time he saw you reading a smut book he nearly lost it.

"Why would you read something like that. Does it.... you know?"

You had to explain to him that its just a type of book but you couldn't help but laugh.

"I know im not big on touch but... if you ever read that and want to try something". Blushing so insanely hard

When you guys had been dating for a while, eventually, date nights turned into dinner, him running you a bath and a new book. Sometimes, he'd join you in the bath. Sitting behind you, scanning the pages together.

I hope this was okay! It didn't specify any NSFW headcannons so I made suggestive ones instead ♡♡

[grogumaximus]

https://docs.google.com/forms/d/1Fr0MR17_8KkwRObWhkBZiAOIXhOs0tvLkNV3krJlsoU/edit?usp=drivesdk

Hii, I'm a uni student getting my degree in psychology and my final research paper so going to be based on F1. I was hoping you could share the link above to your followers. It's a questionnaire that will take roughly 10 minutes, and you select your answer from the options given, no typing required.

It looks at the strength of a person's team identification (basically how strongly you see yourself as belonging to a specific group, e.g. Mercedes fan or Aston Martin fan) and the impact this has on how hostile/positive you feel towards rival fan groups.

My required sample size is quite large (over 300 responses 💀) so your help would be much appreciated!!

oh cool done n submitted! exposing myself as a sport fan hater i enjoy sport haterism like once other team/driver fans post bad takes about who i support even if they're not rivals ill hate watch but its different than being hostile like booing etc its more fun teasing n like rage baiting on x when their driver flops. also im a very emotional fan so i don't interact much or enjoy the fandom side of it when it happens bc im a sore loser n i don't want to see others celebrate n maybe i want to hate watch freely so i answered many with strongly disagree but like still my f1 bestie support a driver n a team i hate on n hates who i support so that also exist. honestly i respect who can separate these things but im insane n this is how i process it

[lil-elle]

hello!! I’m feeling a lil sensitive today and everything is just making me 🥺 how do you think Xikers would comfort their gf when she’s having a bad day?

thank you if you write this 🥰

I'm late but I hope it still helps 🥺

XIKERS comforting their S/O

pairs: bf!xikers x gn!reader

genre: fluff, established relationship, comfort

word count: 1.5k

content: lil kisses, sweet boyfies 🥹

a/n: i'll actually sob, i need me a xikers bf 😔

Minjae:

Once he notices you're tired and feeling down or in a bad mood, he wouldn't push you to talk about it

He'd get you to get dressed, sit down, and he'd make you some nice food and get you a warm drink like a hot chocolate and just pamper you

He'd let you watch whatever you wanted on the TV, even if it's something he doesn't particularly enjoy

He'd disappear halfway through to run a bath for you, putting a towel in the dryer while you're in the bath to warm it up for you

At bedtime, he'd finally ask if you wanted to talk about your day. He'd listen if you did and he wouldn't push it if you didn't, just giving you genuine words of comfort like “you're doing so well” “I love you so much”

-

Junmin:

He'd immediately drop everything to sit down with you and talk to you, using soft words and reassure to get you to let your emotions out

He's not great with words, so he'd just listen, rubbing your back and nodding along, saying “I understand” “I'm sorry baby”

If you started to cry, he'd hold you against his chest gently, encouraging you to cry it out as he pats your head and rubs your back

He'd sit there with you until you were done, then he'd ask what you wanted. If you wanted food, he'd make it/order it, if you wanted to go to bed, he'd go to bed with you no matter how early it was, if you wanted to watch TV, he'd watch with you

In the morning, he'd wake you up with a coffee in bed with a few encouraging words so you could tackle the next day

-

Sumin:

He'd treat you to something really nice, whether that be your favourite takeout, going out for dinner, going to do something fun like karaoke, anything you wanted (depending on how tired you were ofc)

He'd call in sick for you the next day to work/uni or whatever you do and call in sick for work himself so you two could spend the day together just doing whatever you want

He'd eventually get you to talk about your day to him, making jokes to lighten the mood but also empathizing with you and making you feel heard

If it was a specific person that made you feel bad, he'd threaten to kick their shins in, to which you'd have to calm him down and reassure him that it's okay

He'd be so clingy for the rest of the day, because even if he doesn't show it much, you being sad makes him sad

-

Jinsik:

Would immediately take you to snuggle with him in bed, talking softly to you and letting you ramble about your day

If you started crying, he'd almost guaranteed start crying as well, holding you in his arms while whispering that it's all okay and that everything will be fine

You two would order a pizza or something and just eat it in bed while watching a drama together and just relaxing

You'd fall asleep together without even showering or anything, just fall asleep while watching and it'd be the best, heaviest sleep of your life

He'd snuggle you close while you were trying to get out of bed, giggling at his clinginess and you'd eventually just give in, staying in bed with him and sleeping in until the afternoon

-

Hyunwoo:

He'd get you to get into comfy pajamas and you'd sit and do something fun to get your mind off of the day, whether that be watching a movie, playing video games, playing a board game, anything at all

You'd fall asleep that night all tired out from having fun. You'd wake up the next morning and he'd be gone. You'd get out of bed and go into the living room to find him with a bunch of sweets, snacks, and a bouquet of flowers

He'd apologize, saying he's not good with words and comforting people, so he just got you a bunch of gifts to make you feel better

If you cried, he'd lowkey start panicking, thinking you were upset but you'd just hug him and thank him, telling him he's enough

He'd hug you back even tighter, just repeating how much he loves you and how much you mean to him

-

Junghoon:

He's not good with words at all, but he'd comfort you by immediately bringing you to bed and tucking you in, sitting by your bedside as you ranted about your day with him quietly listening

He wouldn't let you get up for anything, if you wanted something, he'd get it for you, no matter what it was

He'd pet you to sleep while playing soft music, not really knowing how else to comfort you but it'd work better than he expected. 

Once you're asleep he'll clean the kitchen and anything that was a mess so you weren't stressed out by it in the morning

He'd try his best to make you lunch to take to work with you the next day with a handwritten note about working hard and not pushing yourself too far, making you smile

-

Seeun:

He'd immediately break out the sweets and snacks, sitting you down like it's a little gossip session as you tell him all about your day

He'd be fully invested, giving you advice and comforting you really well as you tell him the parts that made your day hard

He'd hug you tight and suggest taking a day off tomorrow to do something fun, saying you deserve it for working so hard and just saying all the right things to make you feel better and convince you

The next day you two would go to the zoo, aquarium, movies, anything fun and simple like that while also making it a little date, taking the time to be together and recharge each other's batteries

He wouldn't even let you think about paying for anything while out, immediately pulling out his wallet before you can reach for yours. You'd end up going home with a plushie from the gift shop of wherever you went

-

Yujun:

As soon as the words “bad day” leave your mouth he'd be cuddling you and getting you to sit down with him so you could snuggle

If you wanted to talk, he'd comfort you, if you didn't he'd put on some music you like and just cuddle with you quietly until you felt better or fell asleep

If you fell asleep, he'd carry you to bed and tuck you in before getting in himself and snuggling you to sleep

He'd wake up early to make you a yummy breakfast since you most likely would've gone to bed without eating dinner, too distracted by ranting to him/receiving comfort from him

He'd gently wake you up with a kiss on the cheek and smile, placing a plate of breakfast on your lap with a coffee/glass of milk/ hot chocolate or whatever drink he knows you like

-

Hunter:

He'd immediately become serious, listening to everything carefully with a slightly intense expression on his face and he wouldn't say much

On the inside he's just really worried, his mood is easily affected by your mood. If you're down, he's down. If you're happy, he's happy.

You have to reassure him if it was one specific person that ruined your day because he'd be determined to figure out who it is and give them a piece of his mind

He'd eventually give up, just deciding to pamper you for the rest of the night, running you a bath, making you good food, giving you a massage, doing your skincare for you, almost making you feel bad for how much he's doing but he loves doing it for you

Before you both fall asleep he'd tell you all the things he loves about you, making you super flustered but he wouldn't stop, just wanting you to feel as loved as possible

-

Yechan:

He'd let you rant about everything first and when you're done he'd just hold your face and praise and compliment you, watching you get flustered but not stopping

Then once you think he's finally done he'd just place kisses all over your face until you're giggling and begging him to stop

“There's that smile” he'd smile so wide seeing you feel better. He'd order takeout food and you two would stay up super late watching your favourite shows and movies

You'd fall asleep on the couch together and then wake up in the morning and work together cleaning up the mess you made while blasting music and singing

He'd make it a tradition to sit and rant about your days together after getting home just to ease the tension and nerves of the day

-

♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡

TAGLIST:

@hyunromi @chocoeon @hyunukitty @minjaezed @ihyeokzu @cake1box @chiiyuuvv

[officialchristiancagebbgirlblog]

Can I have early 2000's Edge x Fem reader with prompt 13 along with "I love you simply because you're you" + “I got you" with soft smut and fluff after he sees her scares from a tsunami?

13: “no, no I’m not ready for it to end yet. Not like this”

Word count: 1678

Warnings: panic attack, fingering

Fic type: fluff and smut

Link to masterlist

Tag: @judgementdaysunshine

Hope this is okay! Haven’t written anything in a while as I’ve had a deadline I desperately needed to focus on but that’s done, I’m finished with uni for a few months now, and I’m going to slowly ease myself back into writing! Sorry if this one is a bit shabby, my brain still needs to kick in first

Edit 29/05: so I’m starting the writing today but I’m gonna do something a little cheeky. I’m going to merge the three requests into one as I feel that’ll make my job easier! Hopefully this makes sense lmao. It’s not a full smut just foreplay btw!

Happy reading 🩷

Arriving home after a long stretch of weeks away was always appreciated. Sure, there were a million and one things to do but you both enjoyed the mundane life after the hectic travelling and living out of a suitcase life. Although you enjoyed being back in your shared space with Adam, you were still fixated on your most recent match with the Right To Censor. Unfortunately it ended with a loss on your end. A particularly rough one too. You were lucky not to walk away with any injuries, but let’s just say that Ivory had left you in a bit of a state. Sporting green and purple bruises, you also had red scratches all over your upper body and lower legs from where she had dug her claws in. The shame of both losing and wearing that loss had really brought your confidence down.

Adam had repeatedly tried to get you to tell him what was wrong so he could help but to no avail. Getting the words out of you was like pulling teeth. It wasn’t until you both got into the bathroom, intending to share a relaxing bath together that he was finally able to get through to you.

“Don’t look a second…” you said, waiting for him to turn around while you slowly began to lift your shirt. Adam raised his eyebrow and sighed, walking over to you instead.

“Baby, I’ve seen you naked so many times, you know I don’t care about bruising, stretch marks, or whatever. It’s natural!” He cooed, gently running his hand over your soft hair. Still, you recoiled your hands to cover your face.

“No, don't hide away from me. Let me see your face!" He chuckled, slipping fingers under your palms to pull them back down, “I love you simply because you're you. Here. Let me show you.”

He leant in to plant a soft kiss on your lips, his mouth warm and wet as it made contact. It wasn’t long before you melted fully into it. Slowly removing your clothes for you, he dropped them on the cool floor beside you as he worked on removing your bra. Once that was gone and flung out of the way, he moved his lips to your soft breasts allowing his tongue to circle over your perked up nipples. You gasped in pleasure feeling his hot breath tickle the skin. But before he could get even further with enjoying his time there, the phone in the bedroom rang. The shrill tone made you both jump out of your skin. Grumbling, he planted a quick kiss on the valley between your breasts before walking over to answer the phone. Although you couldn’t hear him, you quickly figured out it was his best friend, Jay. You gleaned this information by the smirk and rolling eyes as soon as he started speaking on the other end.

“What do you mean we have to leave, what are you talking about?”

That sentence piqued your interest. Jay was suggesting that they left? Why?

“Are you sure? But that doesn’t…really happen here man.” It seemed that Adam was, well, adamant that Jay was ribbing him about something. But his raised eyebrows and smirk disappeared when he got his response.

“Shit, okay. Okay. Thank you for letting me know, I really appreciate it…no we’ll be okay, thank you for the offer though. I think there’s a hotel that’s not too far away we can go to…thankfully my mom is looking after her so it’ll be okay. Even if she was here, they accept dogs.”

You wondered what on Earth they were talking about until they said their goodbyes and hung up the phone.

“Okay I know we just got back, but get dressed, pack the important stuff. We have to go now.”

“Why, what’s going on?”

“I’ll explain in the car, please just trust me.”

So you did as you were told, spending the next 15 minutes preparing for something unknown. When in the car, Adam explained that there were concerns of a possible tsunami in the area. It wasn’t easy to predict nor was it that frequent where you both lived but apparently there was a high probability of one occurring nearby. It wasn’t like you guys lived that close to the coastline, but you were close enough that you would be affected by it. You felt a shock of anxiety and panic overcome your body as Adam drove you both to a hotel further inland in hopes of getting a room until it was safe to return home. You were never that great with dealing with natural disasters like that. Being an over-thinker did have its quirks: you would typically be exceptionally prepared for any situation no matter how unlikely, but you also had to deal with the terrible voice in your head that told you all about the horrible things that could go wrong.

“No, no I’m not ready for it to end yet. Not like this.” You mumbled to yourself with eyes squeezed shut, gripping the soft fabric of your trousers. Even if it was to be a minor tsunami, it still rocked you the wrong way regardless. Trying his best to calm you, Adam reached over with his spare hand to gently squeeze your thigh. It was a small gesture but it still meant the world to you. Even if you couldn’t reciprocate or assure him you were fine.

Finally after an unusually long car ride, you reached the hotel and got yourselves a room for three nights. It seemed lots of other people who live in your area had the same idea as the line for booking a room almost led out the door.

“Thank god they had a room available!” Adam sighed, dropping the bags you both had packed on the carpeted floor and plopping himself down in the bed.

“Weren’t we going to share a bath?” You asked, voice higher than usual. The anxiety was still raging inside of your chest but you hoped that by keeping the topic away from current events it would help you return to your regular calm state. Adam simply smiled at you with a sympathetic gleam in his eye.

“Will it help you calm down?” He questioned, pushing himself back up to walk over to you. Nodding quickly you took his hand to pull him into the bathroom as he chuckled. Any and all distractions would be sufficient for you at this point.

For a hotel that didn’t cost an arm and a leg to book, the bathroom was surprisingly fancy! There was a deep bath tucked up against the wall along with a large standing shower next to it. You were used to being in cheaper hotels that either had a combination bath and shower, or just a shower. So this was a nice change! The rest of the room had lovely decorations that were in good taste too. Adam had begun to fill the bath with warm water, shedding his clothes to throw in a forgotten corner. Stepping behind you, he planted slow and gentle kisses to the back of your head, neck, and shoulders as he removed your hastily thrown-on attire. The moist softness of his pink lips sent shivers down your body as he kissed down the middle of your back.

“The bath’s taking a while to fill…” you remarked, “maybe we could…have some fun. While we wait?”

Shuffling around, he now stood in front of you with cheeks flushed red and a cheeky grin plastered on his face. He wasted no time in continuing his actions from earlier before a certain someone decided to interrupt the pair of you. Except this time he went straight for that area that you so desperately needed him. Feeling his open mouth hook onto your nipple almost sent you over the edge right there and then. His hands caressed your body, gripping your thighs and pulling one of your legs up to lean against his hip.

“Let me give you a little idea of what I’m going to do to you later.” He whispered, his lips just barely ghosting over your ear. You felt his hand slide between your legs, gasping as he began to rub small circles over your clit. He didn’t rub for too long as he was focused on giving you exactly what you needed. So it didn’t take long before his long, warm fingers slipped inside the wetness of your cunt. That simple feeling of being stretched caused you to moan loudly, gripping his arms tight as he moved his lips to your exposed neck, kissing and nibbling at the sensitive skin. The room began to warm up and not just because of the hot water. The excitement of getting the pleasure from your boyfriend made it difficult to focus on anything. Hell, you even forgot why you were in the hotel in the first place!

“I got you, baby.” He groaned, feeling you tighten around his pumping fingers. Whines fell from your mouth with the faster he fingered you. In all honesty, you wanted his cock more but with how long his fingers were, it calmed the desperation for him. At least for now. But just as you felt your stomach thing itself in knots over the pleasure, he pulled his fingers out.

“You’re such a dick…” you mumbled, annoyed and horny for him. He let out a soft giggle as he maintained eye contact, bringing his fingers to his mouth to lick off your desperation, taking his sweet time. He always knew how to tease you and keep you yearning for more. By now the bath was filled and at the right temperature so you both got yourselves ready to relax together. The heat of the water made your skin sting as it made contact but it was just perfect enough that you almost completely forgot about the anxiety you experienced that day. Sure, you knew it would come back afterwards but as long as you had Adam on your side, you knew you’d be okay.

[kquil]

hi pookie! happy spooky season! I hope you’re doing better now 🌟 missed your updates! can’t wait for the next chapter of DOB, you absolutely smashed it ONCE AGAIN!! In my humble opinion I think you’ve done a brilliant job at delivering isekai and motherhood. I love this fix it fic so so much!!! That being said I was wondering what inspired you to write a fic like this? was it inspired by another fix it fic? or did you come up with this idea on your own? stay blessed 🐝

omg! i can't believe you called me pookie! hehe~ hello my darling!

happy spooky season, indeed, and thank you so much! i try my best for every chapter so I'm happy you're enjoying it and the tropes ( ˶ˆᗜˆ˵ )♡

as for how i came up with the idea, it was a real mix of things. i was stressed from writing my dissertation for my final year of uni and i needed a distraction and some comfort. i had really fallen in love with the Marauders era and was hurting a lot over their angsty stores, especially Sirius and Regulus. they're such tragic characters, it broke my heart and i really wanted to see them happy. at first, i read through some fix-it-fics that were already out there but most focused on harry and the lightening era, not really the marauders. there also weren't very many reader inserts in the fix-it-fic genre and if there was, it focused a lot on romance, which is understandable but that was one thing i wanted very specifically: a reader insert fix-it-fic without a big focus on romance! so i wasn't really satisfied with what was already online, no offence to the very talented authors who wrote them, i just had very specific tropes and plots in mind that i wanted to read but couldn't really find.

the isekai and motherhood element came purely from my love of isekai manhwas, webtoons and mangas, focusing on the plots where someone becomes the villainess/villain of a story they loved in their previous life and changing the plot so that the villainess/villain gets a happy ending. i mixed that trope with my wish to be a good mother one day and wanting to see the boys with a happy childhood and mother who loved them, which is something every child deserves -- as a writer, i could do that!

in the beginning, it was just going to be a small one-shot, just to scratch that itch y'know? maybe reader transferring and treating the boys to ice cream or something and that was it, nothing too elaborate, just comfort -- i told my friends about the idea and, being harry potter fans themselves, helped me brainstorm it enough to consider writing a mini-series of imagines before i succumbed to turning it into a full series! i was really scared of the commitment since it's such a huge project to take on while i was still writing my dissertation but i pulled through and now, here i am hehe~

[vesselsscarlet]

Regarding my last post... and that is my final notice.

I don't care if I get any backlash on this one. If it came off as harsh and rude, then it is your interpretation of things.

BUT:

If you simply cannot handle it that two people, trying to make things possible for you to be seen by Vessel and the others, get mad and frustrated because of the circumstances... – then I cannot do anything about it.

Trust me. I am in a very bad mental health situation again and receiving asks constantly and in the end not getting as many submissions as we were thinking and hoping of as well... we are just sad.

Crow @aquareegia and I were also thinking of putting this project on ice for a while. To see if people even notice that no updates will come. I talked with others about it that wanted to participate but couldn't come up with anything yet. I told them it is fine.

Its called

Communication

I am just tired. And now I cannot focus on that project anyways.

I am also not that active in the Sleep Token lore because I am just a bit sad. And the only thing that helps me is thinking about the last time where I was happy for a day. That was August 17. But August 19 is a hell date for me.

Being busy with uni and then hearing bad news regarding family and seeing this project not working out strain my mental capacities.

This is just a notice. My perspective on all things.

And please stop comparing our Tumblr project to others or your creative projects. We still would have done everything we could to make this book as beautiful as it needs and to deliver your messages and art to him as you desired it to be. It would not have effected the final project in any way, you have my word for this.

We will wait a few more days.

And we will share one more update in the next seven days.

Until then...

See you on the other side.

(And enjoy my lores in anime.)

– Lia

[remimibanana]

A bit about The Hymn of Disapperance!

I wrote a story about Mizuki and Ena, set after the events of Mizu5 and what I thought could happen between them.

Poor Mizuki is hiding from everyone, until they run into the Empty SEKAI…and Ena is forced to run after them to save them from themselves.

You can read it here!

I thought someone would like to hear my thoughts about how and why I wrote this, and I didn't want to make the notes section too long with my blabbing because I can do a lot of that!

All under the cut!

Conception

I was there when Mizu5 dropped and everyone went insane on Twitter about it.

I've always liked Project Sekai, playing since 2021! I like to play casually, coming back to the game when there is a new card that I really want. This was definitely the case with Mizu5, the designs were absolutely stunning (although I didn't get a single card at the end, weep weep).

The story, especially the ending for the event story tickled my brain in all the good ways, and I was compelled to write something for it. As you can see, I didn't finish thus until WAY later, since I was busy with Uni wrapping up and I kept losing motivation.

I’m glad I finally got it done!

I honestly think I made this story too dark, the actual resolution is way less intense than what I wrote. I think I forgot that they're all just teenagers at the end of the day and nothing this crazy happens, but I did enjoy writing all this out!

I didn’t plan this story out too much, which is the norm for little old me when I write. I also used they/them pronouns for Mizuki here, since I thought it would fit best for the story. It made writing Ena and them a little bit easier.

Beginning

We have Mizuki’s point of view at first, establishing the basis of the story.

From the very beginning, you can tell that they’re not okay at all after what occured. Breaking their mirror, throwing their phone and hearing voices….they’re going through a lot alone despite having their family being kind and friends trying to contact them.

We already know from the game that Niigo disbanded for a little while and that Mizuki has been avoiding everything and everyone. I played into that, especially the bandages on their hands that is mentioned throughout the story.

The cuts are from the glass shards around their mirror, but it can allude to self-harm as well. It’s never explicit since I didn’t want it to be TOO dark (but it gets rather dark either way aha).

Then we have Ena, who just wants to hear Mizuki and to make sure that they’re okay. Fun fact, I wrote the painting scene before Ena5 came out, and she actually is doing a painting at the beginning of the event!

What a coincidence.

I did use lines from the fan translations mawaru_pingudrum did for Mizu5 and Ena5! They were what helped me shape the story into what it is!

SEKAI

I took various creative liberties with the SEKAI, I don’t think half of these things can happen in the actual game…I hope that’s okay! Don’t come at me, Project Sekai lore enthusiasts….

This is where the darkest stuff happens, since it’s the main setting for the story. I think I managed to not make it super bleak but…it still hits hard. I hope I didn’t make anyone cry too much while reading!

I don’t know if the SEKAI can actually change according to someone’s will and emotions but here it can because plot.

Mizuki’s despair was stronger than any other will in there and the place responded in kind. We see a lot of that later in the story, how the SEKAI can change and act.

I knew that I wanted MEIKO and KAITO in the story, since they’re a major motivator for Mizuki to tell Ena their secret in the first place. I hope I didn’t mess up their character too much, I just went off what I saw generally.

I also ship them so that’s very implied hehe, I just had to sprinkle it in there.

I’m sorry I sort of killed them…it was for the plot and they’re okay at the end of the day! It was one of the things that came to me and I had to write it…poor Mizuki though.

I don’t know if you can be forced into any of the SEKAI, but here Ena is because it’s the one thing that Mizuki wants the most aside from wanting to disappear forever as they said.

You can tell I used the Mizuki and Ena cards from the Mizu5 event in the story. The dress that Ena is transformed into is the same one from her card, and the area with the rippled floor is from there too. For Mizuki, the whole latter half of the story takes place based on their card.

Ribbons are a huge part of this story! I made them super scary because…uh…plot once again….and because it appears throughout the card set from Mizu5.

It's important to clarify that the red ribbons are Mizuki's, and the white ribbons are Ena's.

You can see that the SEKAI also reacts to Ena’s will, manifesting the dress you see and giving her the strength to overturn Mizuki’s will. Of course, her will is rather fragile since she’s just a teenager dealing with all these intense things being thrown at her.

The scene where Ena is being constricted by ribbons is probably the most intense scene in the whole story, but it also serves an important purpose. We get to see Mizuki and learn about how they both feel about what happened.

The love is rather implied between them over me explicitly saying that they love each other. You just know based off on what they say and do for one another!

I wonder if you noticed but…Mizuki can hear Ena’s thoughts because they are the master of the SEKAI and it is bending to their will completely. Practically like a God if you think about it.

Since that Mizuki in this place is just a reflection of that monster as they call it, they help her find the real Mizuki who is all tied up like she was. It got a little too dark here too….

Especially the bleeding I keep alluding to. Both of our character’s hands are bleeding in parts of the story, a parallel between the two who are both trying their best.

I wanted to play into the fact that Ena is just a girl, and she has this habit of slamming her feet when she’s stressed or annoyed. This is amplified and used as a way to break Mizuki free when her will becomes stronger than Mizuki’s once again.

I saw a tweet back then that these two cards are taking place in the same area, and I knew I had to use it in my story.

It transforms back into the proper bedroom after Ena’s will takes over, surprising her.

After all the suffering, we finally have a proper reunion between the two girls. I wanted it to be sweet, with a lot of hand holding and hugs. It’s not all that dark, okay?

The mirror is very important, I mentioned it a lot. I wanted to show that Mizuki's reflection is now normal, because they aren't a monster as they keep calling themselves to be. Here, it’s implied Ena can hear Mizuki’s thoughts because SHE’S the new master.

I’m so big brain.

We have MEIKO and KAITO come back! I’m not that cruel to have them disappear forever. I knew I wanted them to appear right at the end in their new outfits we can see in the Mizu5 set. Clearly something happened between the two because they're acting much closer than before (I wonder what LOL).

The ending itself is nice and happy, wrapping up the whole story as a whole! Niigo reunite and everything is alright again between them all at the end of the day.

That’s a wrap!

Thank you for reading all this if you do!

I spent a lot of time on this story and I’m glad it’s finally done, out there for others to see! I can now move on to other stories I want to write that won’t hopefully take as long…

Maybe I’ll write some more Project Sekai in the future if I feel like it!

- Miku

[sab-teraa]

Tye Talks: A Diary Entry

(22/02/24 || 22:58 pm)

Good evening friends, I hope you are all well and having a lovely Thursday! Just one more day till the weekend! Yay <3

Inspired by the lovely @the-winds-of-destiny-xxx , I've decided to start blogging about my day. Hopefully, I will be able to stay up to date lol.

Work

Ugh, I've been up since 5am prepping myself to deliver my second lecture of the semester. It went well, kinda. The students were super interactive which is great. Application + practicality > regurgitating information. They did super well. Also, we have a new HoD, and while I really liked our previous heads, the new HoD is a breath of fresh air and I really enjoy their approach towards education.

My full-time job is actually soooo … atm. My colleague has resigned which is all cool and I wish her the best.

But, there’s a trend I’ve noticed recently within our organization … and I hope it does not present any problems in the future. Tbh, I think it has presented a problem before … but idk. Anyway, constructive criticism goes a long long way … only if you’re keen and willing to learn …. which this person defo is NOT.

Enough about my colleagues, the CEO presented me with an opportunity but I'm lowkey nervous .. bc I prefer being a private + somewhat anonymous person lol, but I obviously said yes. Let's see how it goes, anything can happen and this whole project might fall through. Especially in this economy.

All in all, I really love my job and the career path I’ve taken. I hope it does not backfire on me later on in life.

Uni

Gosh. Uni is the bane of my existence atm. Tho, i did make a bit of progress on my thesis today. I know exactly what I need to do, but I just don't have the motivation to it. But, I think I've finally got myself together .. so let's see what happens.

Also, I'm so grateful for my thesis supervisor <3 she is so understanding and supportive.

Health

Is this tmi? Maybe? Apologies if so?

But, my nose and throat have been KILLING me recently? Idk if it’s bc of the fan or what … but yup. Thank god for cloves! They’ve helped wayyyy more than anything else I’ve tried lol. Also, my pms is really starting to hit 😭😭 I’ve been in soooo much pain since I got back home.

My mentally, I’m doing okay … there’s obvs moments in the day where I’m like shit?? I’m an adult adult?? Yet my life feels so stagnant 😂 but then I try to keep it moving and not think so much about what I want … and I try to focus on what I do have…. bc I’ve done my best.

Fun and mundane

I finally got to go to my first gym class of the week - I really needed that! The housewives from my class invited me for smoothies afterwards … and they are so fun! Are they my mums age mates? Yes 😂😂 but I loved hanging out with them .. they truly live in their own bubble .. I wanna be exactly like them when I’m older lol.

Oh Oh! And I finally finished the second season of Al Rawabi School for Girls ... flip, it truly broke my heart. What an amazing show.

I really wanted to start the new season of Real Housewives of Durban … but the new Showmax app is truly YUCK! I have the ick 🫠🫠 but, I love the show waaaaay too much, so I’d probs get over it soon lol.

Other than gym and catching up on tv, I made a delicious lasagna for dinner. I'm convinced that my homemade meat sauce and cheese sauce remains undefeated, or maybe that's just me being cocky lol. If I had more space, I would have defo attempted to make the pasta too.

I'm super excited for this weekend bc my friends and I are going to this art and music event and getting food afterwards. I also really wanna buy that duvet set I saw online ... since I'm no longer purchasing an apartment (recession boo boo boo 🍅🍅🍅), I may as well just re-do my current apartment lol. It already looks great, but I've been putting off getting a new duvet set bc I presumed I was gonna buy a bigger bed lol... so I've just been rotating between the two sets I have ... and damn they've seen better days lol.

Relationships

After all he has been through, my brother finally has some great things happening. I am so proud of him. I know he will achieve everything he aspires to <3 This has also done wonders for his self-confidence, he truly needed this, and I hope ... I really hope that it stays on this positive track.

Positive family news aside, idk if anyone saw the post about my uncle? But god damn I'm annoyed af. (Side note: He is my mums cousin btw; but my entire family is close). Anyway, my uncle called my mum to rant … and according to my mum he was sooooo proud of what he said to his wife??? I’m just disgusted. Idk how. His wife could forgive him for this. I’m so glad my mum put him in his place ✋🏽✋🏽✋🏽

I know its not about me and I have no right to speak on other people's relationships, but I hate seeing people put their all into a relationship and even go against their own family to be with someone ... only for their partner to treat them like this. His wife deserves soooooo much better and its sooo heartbreaking that she has to go through. My heart truly breaks for her. I pray everything works out for her.

Conclusion

Anywho … if you made it this far! Thank you for reading my ramblings <3 wishing you a lovely day! Stay safe babes 😘