#i hope so cause i was writing this like carmen berzatto personally victimized me

[etherealising]

well…🤭 honestly i’m pretty much dropping them as a whole i fear. i did a rewatch like a month or so ago and it hit me then (especially rewatching s2) but after watching that trailer for the third time it’s official. I think in the beginning i wanted sydcarmy sooo badly i was willing to overlook the red flags (and we all know how many there are 💀) but i just can’t do it anymore. while i still acknowledge the intimate moments they shared together i just view them as *pause for dramatic effect* platonic. they share a platonic intimacy that YES is stronger than whatever that was b/w camry and claire s2. but it still feels just that, platonic. i think we don’t see those kinds of dynamics enough. carol and daryl from twd are a great example i think (i’ll add a text i sent to a friend a while ago where i explain further). while i believe that syd and camry understand each other in a way that no one else can, i still think sydney deserves so much better than carmen. i think he uses and abuses her and that if people loved her like they say they do, they would want more for her. she can’t fix him y’all and neither can claire but honestly she can go ahead and take him off our hands if she wants to try so bad. she has dreams and ambitions that are greater than a romantic relationship with camry. we saw how her and richie stepped up and ran shit in the season 2 finale. he needs her and not the other way around. say they do get together. do we think those anger issues and erratic and abusive behaviors are just gonna cease to exist? that man needs therapy and years of it before he’d ever be good enough for her as a romantic partner. hell, he’s a shitty business partner! (and i’m not saying he needs to be a completely healed person to be worthy of love let’s be clear, syd need therapy too.) i say, introduce someone new for sydney! or just let her be, that’s also an option. but yeah i think i’m done. also i’m hoping the writers let her and marcus stay friends cause it’s giving little bro 😬. (just another example of a man mistaking a woman’s kindness for flirting let’s be real) she needs friends anyway and because what other ones does she have? (please don’t say camry, that man is not her friend 😭. they’re kinda like family atp. 🫣🤷🏾‍♀️ ) and marcus may need someone like sydney to talk to anyways if what i fear may happen, happens this season for him.

i tried so hard to respond to all of your points and then i started ranting but i hope this makes sense and in short i do find myself heavily agreeing with you.

bestie as soon as i saw the thesis you provided me with i knew i had to take some time to digest it and as much as it hurts dare i say…. i think i have to agree with you : (

i too was blinded by how badly i wanted sydcarmy to thrive and i think i was also fighting so hard against the way people in the fandom were trying to discount their “romance” because ayo is a black woman and they couldn’t fathom their favorite fictional white boy of the week lovin on someone who isn’t the “beauty standard” that i definitely overlooked just how toxic their whole situation is.

and you are so right it was so easy to get caught up with how badly i wanted them together and a series rewatch will definitely slap you in the face and let you know how blinded you were. now please don’t fight me but i think its def giving platonic/little bro from syd like homegirl is just trying to live out her dreams, but i def think carmy may look at her with a bit of a romantic undertone because of how you mentioned they understand each other and i think bc he feels like no one has really ever understood him including his own family that he finds himself drawn to syd, she pretty much validates his whole existence and challenges him instead of settling for the mediocrity that man constantly gives that in a way he has taken her platonic care and worry for him as something more. like he literally admitted he was a loner man doesn’t understand HOW to be friends especially not with women.

let me get on my soapbox real quick. you are absolutely 100% right syd deserves someone a thousand times better than carmy and i definitely want more for her, if i’m being honest i want her to leave the bear whenever she gets that chance but that’s a whole other convo. i can rant about claire and carmy for hours but i’m genuinely just so tired of them and i’m not looking forward to seeing their relationship this season whoops. to me it felt like carmy only began respecting syd after she came back and now he has this mindset that no matter how much vitriol he spews her way she’ll always be there for him and its like a crutch for him. what really sealed the deal for me is the whole take out episode from season one, did syd fuck up 100% yes and was carmy’s anger justified also yes but not to the extent that he went, every time i rewatch that scene of him throwing the sharpie in syd’s direction as she walks away i feel genuine disgust like yes i know the sharpie wasn’t working and that got him even more irritated but he could’ve thrown it in so many different directions and i’m not saying he purposely aimed to hit syd but rewatching that really just showed me how immature he is and how much growing he really does need. like if your next response to your own anger is to get violent and start throwing shit around you definitely need to work on yourself before trying to mess with someone else’s peace of mind.

if they were to get together it would not change carmy at all, getting involved romantically with someone does not change you as a person unless YOU WANT THAT CHANGE FOR YOURSELF! and what we’ve seen from carmy is that as much as he pushes everyone else to change and evolve it doesn’t seem to be something he can do for himself or thinks he’s capable of. and yes please keep syd and marcus as friends there is literally zero chemistry between those two regarding romance, like can we just let syd be the successful woman she wants to be and maybe offer her romance if she wants it.

also let me go back to the topic of change real quick just look how quick he was to attack richie while he was stuck in the walk-in, he was literally projecting his deep seeded insecurities onto richie while richie took the change carmy pushed on him like a fucking champ and got shit done with his bestie syd (these fics i’m writing for this man really got me defending richie)

i will end my nonsensical rant by saying this: no self-respecting person in this fandom would actually ever date carmy and i stand by that ten toes down. its very clear that he has his own behaviors he needs to work out and there is nothing wrong with that and that doesn’t mean he doesn’t deserve love but that also doesn’t mean his partners should be subjected to the mental and emotional weight that would come with loving him, it would definitely get tiring fast. and to take it a step further if carmy wasn’t played by a white man the masses find attractive most everyone would definitely be singing a different tune in regards to him. (like please imagine the microagressive think pieces we would get every season if carmen berzatto was poc)

the carmen berzatto we know and see right now will always love self-sabotaging more than he could ever love anyone else.