#i hope i don't sound judgemental- i totally get it i'm a quiet person too but he just has this vibe ya know

[vampiresluvr]

okay so i have a coworker that's super intimidating & i kind of dread working with (bc of the intimidation; he seems like he's probably a really cool dude) but today he said "later, [my name]" and stuck his hand up in the air, and waited for me to turn around and see him before he left and my dumb ass genuinely got butterflies

[tarot-by-e11e]

Hello! May I participate in your mini "inner demon" game? My initials are MK. This might sound cliche, but a phoenix is what I feel nearly embodies my dark side. To be more specific, I totally can relate to the Dark Phoenix from the X-men series. I tend to care for a lot of people that I unintentionally bottle up a lot of emotions inside myself. At times, these pent-up emotions do get released, but it's always directed towards my family members. In other words, I believe I have a very strong mental capacity, but I still tend to hurt the ones I love. The Dark Phoenix is similar: a very powerful, uncontrollable being that causes destruction, whether that person is a loved one or not.

Hi MK,

Thank you so much for participating in my Inner Demons ask game.

Hey, there's nothing wrong with resonating with the Phoenix... I'm actually proud of you of being aware of your shadow aspects, so let's get to see how being a Phoenix would resonate with your reading.

So the cards I pulled are: King of Swords, Judgement, 5 of Swords

By any chance, are you the "head over heart" kind of person? If you can reason your way into making the situation make sense to you, it leaves you frustrated, stuck and spiral down? Ever been told that you don't know how to relax properly, or were told to just chill? Some might say that you're a bit uptight or rigid, or there would be others who said that your standards are a bit too unrealistically high?

My dear, your standards are not too much for those who are meant for you. So what your Inner Demons is usually perceived by others a rigidity, it's actually realistic practicality.

Now because of how you can calmly assess and move towards a difficult situations which uncharacteristic(for your age) calm level headedness, others might tease you for being too logical, which some with go as far to say that you have no emotions. That is far from the truth.

It isn't that you don't have emotions, it's that you know that given the situation, you need to think on your feet and get out of the mess as quickly as possible, so that you can immediately find a safe and quiet space to let your intense emotions let out of your system.

You might be the type that doesn't really like to cry in front of people. Or you're the type to view your display of emotions as weakness. It would be because people from the past might have intentionally preyed upon you in your lowest moments and used your own emotions against you. Which would make you feel ashamed for even letting anyone close enough to get to know you in your most vulnerable state.

My dear, you didn't deserve to be hurt by those cruel people. Granted, you showed kindness to those who didn't deserve it. It doesn't make you stupid for feeling betrayed. You simply chose to see the best in the worst people.

You have this hidden desire for hope, despite living such a harsh life. There might be a time during your younger years when you wished so badly that there would be someone to save you from this pain. You need to always remember: The adult you've become now is the adult you wished to have protect you as a child.

The situations and hard lessons you've endured, learned and conquered, made you into the adult you wished saved you in the past. Granted that you never wanted to even go through what you've barely survived from, I'm not here to invalidate your feelings or experiences.

You have every right to feel angry, lost, helpless, you're allowed to feel that you have had enough and are done with life. But here you are, warm blood coursing through your veins, with the same heart that's gone through hell and back, still beating strongly in your chest. You've outlived all the crap you thought would break you. And that's all thanks to your realistic practicality.

I know, if you could have avoided those pain, you would; but somewhere deep inside of you, is quietly grateful for the blessings and gifts that came after conquering this harsh situations.

Now I find it interesting that what you subconsciously desire/seek is an awakening, but in your case, it seems like you're searching for your purpose in life.

It might be that, even if you make enough to survive, you don't feel fulfilled in you life. Like there's this gaping hole in your chest that's begging to awaken the fire within. You don't want to just live comfortably enough and die; you want to make you life worth living. Your desire for meaningful and fulfilling life feels so grand, like being nothing and everything at the same time. It's both fascinating and overwhelmingly cosmic.

Now how you're suggested to go about this desire with the help of your realistic practicality is actually shadow work. Because it seems that you have a lot to unpack. You have a lot of unresolved traumas and wounds that you have long forgotten buried in the back of your mind. You've been so in the present, exhausted and burnt out in the responsibilities of life that you couldn't even muster the energy to listen to what your body and soul need.

Facing your shadows is one of the many ways to get closer to this desire. However, a step forward is to create a safe space where you can hold space for your emotions to be felt, validated, and understood. This could be going to therapy or incorporating shadow work into your daily destress self-care routine. It's really coming strongly that allocating a specific time every day to feel your feelings and hear yourself out is absolutely non-negotiable in your suggestions.

You are advised to be ferocious and protective of your peace and sanity. If someone comes up to you to ask for your assistance yet you don't even have the energy for yourself, politely turn them down and suggest they ask someone else. Never forget: What you tolerate teaches others how to treat you.

This concludes the end of your reading. Do let me know how this resonates with you. Feel free to show some support via my Buy Me A Coffee here (This reading is for entertainment purposes only.)

[mikareo]

OMG MATCHUPS ARE OPEN (⁠≧⁠▽⁠≦⁠) (i'm frantically typing HELP)

Desired fandom, gender and age would be bllk, male and teen (sfw)

I'd say I'm quiet / shy (around friends I can get talkative tho), honest (to the point I sound mean at times), observant and apparently I'm sassy at times too. My star sign's scorpio (idk the other ones), my mbti is intp. My favourite hobbies are reading, writing, listening to music, playing badminton and (sometimes) studying. I love eating and going on walks (especially by the ocean or when it starts getting dark). Ideal date would probably be a bookstore one (I've never dated before so I have no clue on what I exactly like or don't like)

I hope this wasn't too much jsjshs (If I can find something nice I'll send them in for the appearance match up)

💌 ✮⋆˙ love letter to...kitorin!

i think this is actually the fastest i've ever done a matchup just bc i was like giggling at how cute u guys would be together :3 i hope you like this character souta!!!! i think he's a sweetheart n you two would work rlly well as a pair,, also!! i just saw me on ur carrd ily!!!

[ ꒰ᐢ. .ᐢ꒱₊˚⊹ ᰔ ] your complete matchup results!

congratulations . . .‧₊˚🍂✩CHIGIRI HYOMA₊˚🍁⊹♡

⋆⭒˚｡⋆ chemistry analysis . . .

i'm ngl it took me a good like five minutes of thinking to figure out who i wanted to match you with n i argued w myself on three options until i landed on chigiri. the other matches were very similar to you and i realized i wanted someone more extroverted rather than an introvert...so here's why i picked chigiri!

off the bat, i think you two would connect on that level of honesty you have. chigiri is a very blunt person and always says what he's saying when he's thinking it. knowing that you also tend to be on the honest and blunt side of things, i think that you two could communicate together without that judgement there may be w/ other people, n have a really great foundation of trust that is essentially unbreakable. he'd definitely really value you since you keep him on his toes, n make sure that he's sticking to his goals n constantly improving (after all, you're there to tell him if he's not)!

i consider chigiri more of an extroverted introvert. i didn't want to match you with a total extrovert since i didn't want you to drown in their outgoingness or obnoxiousness; so i think chigiri is a good fit in this case. he enjoys his quiet time, which the two of you could fondly share, but also gets out of his comfort zone when he feels himself settling down. he'd constantly check in w/ you to make sure that you're okay with wherever you are/whoever you're with, n puts you're comfort first. if there's ever a situation that you feel like you want to get out of to escape for a little bit of peace and quiet, he's right by your side and holding your hand until you're away from the crowd.

his character analysis also matches extremely well with your hobbies and interests! as stated, chigiri really enjoys "drinking tea and eating sweets". he'd surely love to take you out to the new restaurants in town or even the local コンビニ to pick out your favorite snacks for a chill movie night in! on his off days, he prefers to read— so he'd happily visit the bookstore w/ you and sit in there for hours so long as he has his favorite drink by his side, laughing at whatever sassy remark you throw at him. he'd think of these quiet moments on the field when he needs to focus or concentrate on a shot; you being the thing that relaxes him and calms his heartbeat.

⋆⭒˚｡⋆ memories on the wall . . .

⋆⭒˚｡⋆ a treasured moment . . .

how loud does he have to slurp that damn straw?

you've only been at the bookstore for maybe ten minutes (?), and chigiri finished his drink in the first two. it was some sort of tea— maybe an iced jasmine with honey— and it was good when he let you have a sip! but it was only a sip; and then suddenly it's just ice and a plastic straw. your boyfriend enjoys his sweets, his treats, and especially his teas. you, however, enjoy some peace and quiet when you're trying to find the perfect book.

"you sound like a vacuum." the eye roll you send in his direction is deadly. he's practically shot on sight "i mean that in a bad way."

"i should've gotten the extra large, right?" he shakes the cup, frowning as he realizes there is absolutely zero drink left. he's so cute, it's annoying.

without glancing in his direction, you toss him a book or two that you're debating on adding to your shelf— which he, of course, catches with ease and balances on top of one another. his agility is outstanding on and off of the field, but sometimes you wish he'd miss...just for the laughs. "you would've finished the XL...what...ten seconds later?" he really is like a human vacuum.

though your tone is laced with irritation, you hand him your glass. "don't make me regret it." to which he happily sips on with a smile on his face.

so cute.

if there was an award for the prettiest, red haired, japanese, youth, male, potential striker, football player in the world; chigiri would definitely win. yes, that's a very specific title— but also it's the only way you know he'd win.

“i love you,” you murmur under your breath. you do love him, you really do…

…but you take back your words when that damn slurping sound returns.