#i highly doubt i'll be getting any writing done today

[vagueandominousvibes]

Red, from the Knights' Lodge AU!

I decided to touch his design up a bit. Looking at the sketch yesterday, I wasn't entirely sure how I felt about it, but it's grown on me.

Red, I think, is more aware of how damaging his element can be, compared to the others' (maybe there's a story there), so he feels like he needs to have a higher level of self-control — both of his own powers and his own emotions (which can affect his powers). I wanted this to be reflected in his outfit, hence a leather armour that's more restrictive/covering than Blue's and Green's, and generally more layers. He also makes sure to keep himself firmly grounded (semi-meditative practice, both feet on the ground), just to maintain that level of awareness.

[bellaxgiornata]

Ask the boys! What are Mikey and/or Matt's favourite comforting ways to decompress (with reader)?

Ohhhh, thank you for this one!! I had to sit them down for this little dialogue! As always, I'll throw everything under the cut because this'll be longer. But please enjoy this gif depicting Matt's enthusiasm levels today at me being distracted from a particular fic update he wants.

Bella, dramatically shouting: So who's ready to play ASK THE BOYS?!

Mikey, cringing a little on the couch: D'ya really need to say it like that, pet?

Matt, raising a brow: Yeah, we're not exactly on an episode of Family Feud. This isn't a game show.

Bella: No, but could you imagine if you were? Maybe Fog could be the fourth player. And you know what? I'd actually pay good money to see that because it'd be hilarious. But now that you say that, I think I want to play Ask the Boys like it is a game show every time someone asks for it. So thank's for that, Matty!

[Matt dramatically sighs loudly on the couch beside Mikey]

Frank, shouting from the kitchen as he makes coffee: Can you just let the lady have some fun? Play along, dammit. Don't you know better than to argue with a pregnant woman, anyway?

Mikey, settling into the couch: He has a point. Best not to argue.

Matt, reluctantly: Fine. What's the question?

Bella: Okay, since you're being a sourpuss I'm asking Mikey first. What's your favorite comforting way to decompress with Reader/a significant other?

Mikey, scratching his beard in thought: Suppose I'd say...somethin' calming. Like takin' a walk, just holdin' hands and enjoyin' each others' company. Or maybe cuddlin' up in bed or on the sofa with a book and just readin' together, not even sayin' a word. I deal with enough excitement with my family, don't exactly need anymore outside o' that, y'know? I'd rather just...slow things down for a bit together. Be able to hold them and just be with them.

Bella: Ohh, I like that. You definitely do need less stress and a slower paced environment with some of the stuff your family puts you through constantly. Or like...an entire change of scenery that isn't Dublin.

Mikey, humming in agreement: Ya can say that again.

Bella, focusing on Matt: Now Matt, same question.

Matt, growing a sheepish smile: I'd have to say...in my bed with both of us not wearing clothing--[quickly holding up a hand to quiet everyone before they interject] solely because it's far too irritating if I'm trying to decompress and relax with too much outside stimulation, not for any other reasons. I'd rather just feel them over anything else. Because I'd prefer to focus in on their heartbeat and their breathing, listening to the sound of their voice as they talked. Sometimes outside stimulation just gets to be too much with my senses, and that's where I'd feel the most comfortable with a partner while trying to decompress. Somewhere without some of that extra stimulation. And uh...I wouldn't mind being the one who was being cuddled instead of doing the cuddling, I guess, too...

Bella, nodding: Makes sense. I think we're all well aware of how touch starved you tend to be--especially for a touch that isn't someone punching you in the face for once. Obviously for you to decompress with a partner, you'd want them doing the comforting. Though I highly doubt you'd ever just, you know, ask for what you wanted, so you'd need a partner that already could intuit that. But you know, there's nothing wrong with asking for what you need, Matt.

Matt, abruptly rising from the couch: Okay, I wasn't expecting this to turn into a therapy session. Are we done now?

Bella, rolling her eyes: If it was a therapy session with all of you, we'd be here for months. But yes, that does answer the question for this round of Ask the Boys!

Matt, grinning: Great, now maybe you can get back to that thing you're almost finished writing for me. You know the one.

Bella, sighing: Fine, fine. I'll let you three get back to pre-baby panicking in here for now while I finish it.

(Bella's Follower Celebration Post for those who want to join in the fun!)

[heavyhitterheaux]

Can you write something inspired by this tiktok? (https://www.tiktok.com/t/ZT8JSrRgf/). The triplets can be in their teenage years and they love getting on Jack's nerves.

AN: The triplets are 15 in this 🥰

"I thought I told the three of you to clean your rooms? But yet you're still here in front of me scrolling on your phones." You said while shaking your head in disbelief at the sight of them sprawled out in the living room.

"My room is already clean." Autumn responded while shrugging and you then heard Jack's footsteps behind you.

"Now if your room was already clean, I highly doubt your mother would say anything."

"I'll do mine later."

"This isn't a democracy, Axel. And as far as I'm concerned I didn't give you an option."

Silence.

You simply turned to look at Jack defeated but he wasn't having it.

"Oh. You know what? All three of you hand me your phones. NOW."

"Wait, what?" Ivy said while finally looking up from hers.

"Nice of you to join us, Ivy. All three of you hand them over."

"But…"

"Ax, one more word and you won't be playing next Saturday and Autumn if you even fix your mouth to open and complain the pool party won't be happening."

"Damn, and I thought mommy was the strict one." Autumn muttered and Jack gave her a look.

"Do you want to repeat that?" He asked while looking at her and she immediately shook her head no as all three of them handed over their phones.

"You know what? Any time any of you complain about doing your chores and cleaning up around here, I'm hitting on mom. Babe, you want to make another baby?" Jack asked as he turned to look over at you and you immediately laughed as he leaned down to kiss you.

"EW GROSS!"

"And how do you think the three of you got here!?" Jack responded but all he got were groans and gagging noises from his oldest children.

"YOU HAVE ENOUGH CHILDREN!" Ivy exclaimed while throwing her hands up in the air.

"Hmm, I might take you up on that offer." You said while wrapping your arms around his waist and smirking up at him while he leaned down to kiss your nose.

"We can get started right now."

"NO. PLEASE NO."

"Did I tell you that you look gorgeous today and that I love you?" Jack asked you while ignoring the triplets' pleas for him to stop.

"Yes, but I don't mind hearing it again. And I love you too."

"OKAY, WE GET IT. WE'RE WAVING THE WHITE FLAG. WE SURRENDER."

"So that means any time we ask you to do something that it will get done without an attitude? I know all three of you got it from your mom, but still."

"Jackman…."

"Let me finish so we can go and make this baby." Jack answered you but not before you pinched his side.

"We'll do it! Just stop hitting on mom!"

"You three wouldn't be here if I didn't hit on her when we were fourteen. Now if I hear one of you complain, consequences will be heard next. Axel, clean the kitchen, Autumn, walk the golden girls, Ivy, clean the tank for the ninja turtles and all three of you clean your rooms. It better be spotless too and Autumn don't stuff everything in your closet again and have it fall on your mother when she opened it. It took me 40 days and 40 nights to find her."

"Imma kick your ass." You said in between laughing because you knew that he was exactly right.

"Mom is not about to make another baby will you if you keep making fun of how short she is." Ivy said while shaking her head.

"Hmm, that's what you think."

"OKAY, I've been grossed out enough to last a lifetime." Axel said before getting up and making his way into the kitchen.

[connieshands]

Conrad Veidt Painting Mystery Updates

After a lot of back and forth I am now the proud owner of this piece and holy shit it is so much more beautiful in person!

Regarding the mystery surrounding his name on the frame below the cutoff are a few thoughts I have:

the name is on the frame, not the painting itself. So maybe the name has nothing to do with the portrait, however I highly doubt it's a totally separate thing. The painting is nailed in there and the nails look old and rusty. My assumption is the picture was nailed on there when it was finished

The name has a lot of similarities to his own signature. I think there is a good chance it came from his hand. Here is my analysis on this:

(Keep in mind, I am an absolute amateur, so don't take anything I say too seriously)

If we compare the name on the frame to a signature from the same year we can see that especially the beginning 4 letters have a lot in common with the autograph: The C is missing the loop up top, but is generally slanted the same way and characteristicly for his hand the lower part rather than curling up again moves in a right direction. The V is the most noticable. It has the typical little hook on the left leg and also the very far reaching right leg thats stretches over the e. That letter on the other hand is not quite as clear. The loop of the e does not start out on as high of a point than the one on the autograph. However the general proportions of the e with the relatively high loop are similar and the way it continues into the i and the i in general are practically the same as in Connie's signature. Now the dt and the 22 is where the similarities stop. The dt in Connies signatures are always right-leaning, while the ones on the frame lean left. the 22 also doesn't look similar at all.

So in conclusion - I am optimistic it could be his signature, given the many similarities, but we cannot be sure yet. We also have to keep in mind that the name on the frame is barely 5mm tall and written in wood and on a slight slope, so how similar to writing on paper can that really be?

regarding the writing next to the name and date - I have no idea what it sais. It could say Berlin, but it's really hard to make out, even irl.

So, assuming he wrote this - what are the options? Could it just have been a separate frame of his or a painting he owned- not really. What weirdo signs his own frame or a painting he bought? And with a date at that.

Could it have been an autograph on a painting made by a fan? I don't think so. He did not write out the full Conrad, which he always did on his autographs. Also the name is super tiny. Why would he have made it so incredibly small when signing something?

I currently think the option that he made this painting is one of the most realistic

There are fingerprints in the back of the painting in the paint. Almost certainly produced when making the painting. So if this was really done by Connie I might have HIS FINGERPRINTS !!! Hgahdnfkndjendndndj

I need outside perspective here. Is all this just wishful thinking on my part? What are other possibilities this could be, keeping in mind the facts I just told you? Assuming the signature is not done by him. Who could have made it and why?

The painting smells like cigarettes. I know that that has nothing to do with anything I just wanted you to know.

The seller is very desinterested in the whole thing and I could barley get him to talk about anything regarding the painting. I'm still hoping to get an answer to my question of where he got it from but I am not very confident in that regard.

I have already contacted a historian I personally know and he gave me the helpful tip that to find anything out about it I should probably go the Feininger route, as he is much more known today. So I guess I'll be reading into him and contacting Feininger experts.

If anyone else has any other leads or ideas or wants to assist me in my journey to finding out more about this painting please don't hesitate to contact me either here or on the Connie Discord I made.

That's it for now. I'm so excited to dig into this mystery!

[winterburnwriting]

Progress for Today (Jan 10)

Well I managed to get some more writing done today. Er, last night? This morning? Yes today was my day off and I had to take care of some things for my family but after that was dealt with and making a pitstop at a record store, it was my intention to get some writing done. At least a little. I am prioritizing consistent progress over great amounts of progress.

I stayed up late watching TV (Resident Alien on Syfy, good show) and working on some various things around the house. I didn't do any job-hunting (something I probably should have found time for). But it was a nice enough evening. A big storm kicked up in the afternoon and persists as I write this, with some of the strongest winds we have seen here in years.

A couple hours ago the storm must have ripped something off a tree down the street because our power flickered and went out. This happens frequently in the highly rural area I live in. Sometimes it won't return for weeks on end. It's a hoot. But thankfully, as I was preparing to climb into bed very early and get some reading done, the power returned just as quickly as it had gone.

Realizing I had yet to get any writing done yet and not wanting to do it on my phone in bed, I decided to re-open my laptop so I could write just a couple paragraphs. Instead I started getting into the rhythm of the process and wrote about 1,067 words. Not some great accomplishment, especially to any proper author, but I was proud. It was a couple more pages out of the way.

I am on chapter 3, which still places me at the simple beginning of the story. There is a newlywed couple. Chapter one is very short and explores the home life of these two in very short form. It also sets up the shabby state of their cheap apartment, and the husband's finding a real dinky property for them to buy and turn into a beautiful home with renovations and redecorations.

Chapter two focuses on the husband, who spends his day working on professional sculpting work and struggling with their collapsing home and failing appliances. There's a lot of emphasis on the fact these two are not making a great living. I also include a cute mouse named Gerald, who is not a pet but he is a friend. There's a brief phone call sequence at the beginning with the husband and his father. I might change that to make it a little more volatile. I'm not sure where I want to take that yet. It depends highly on the logistics of later chapters.

I've only just started chapter 3, but it'll focus on a day at work for the wife. She tends tables at a local diner. She's friends with her coworkers. One of them alerts her to a strange beatnik customer at the bar, wearing leather and sporting a goofy but discerning look. His teeth are mangled and sharp. It's a sight. She also saw his oddly fancy car outside. That's all I have so far. This is setting up some things for future chapters. Where the chapter will go from there I'm not certain. I might just spend it developing her and her normal life a bit more. Sometimes it's fun just to write normal folks living normal lives, too.

That's all I have today. Hopefully it isn't the last time this week I manage to get some writing in. I want to get at least 3.5-5k words committed to paper each week. A low goal, but that's all I need to get this finished within a couple months. Wish me luck! I'll include a very short excerpt below. The names are completely temporary. Have a good night! Er... day.

"Lucy reached the time clock and slid her punch card in. She wondered about moving. Would it affect her ability to work here at the diner? She hoped not. This job was quite good for her. She always doubted the idea that she could work somewhere else. And she got decent pay, all things considered. More than anything, she would just miss having her friends to talk to during her shifts. She decided not to tell them she might be ripped out of her post.

“Mornin’ Luce!” chirped a bird named Liz. She was blonde and short - Shorter than Lucy, who was slightly above average height. Her smile reminded Lucy this shift wouldn’t be so bad. She wasn’t alone."

[upstartpoodle]

Hello. I am new to Tumblr. I signed up today but I found your Poldark fic, Moving Forward a few days ago and it’s exceptional. I am also a big fan of George and Elizabeth. I have really enjoyed reading your other fics and exploring your Tumblr page, which is second to none. Are you still writing Moving Forward? At the risk of appearing greedy, do you think that you will be posting any short excepts from the next chapter in the near future? Thank you.

Hi thanks for the ask! Sorry it's taken me a while to respond - I can be pretty slow when it comes to answering asks but I'm always happy to get them. :D

I'm glad to hear that you've been enjoying my fics! As for Moving Forward, I am still writing it - just at a pace that would make a snail look like an Olympic sprinter ha. I'm happy to post another little extract - @lashbrook11 asked if I could post one as well so this one's for both of you. :) It won't be from the next chapter though, as I've finally managed to get past the writer's block which basically slowed me down to a halt with this fic and have literally just finished writing the chapter. I just need to finish typing it up and give it a quick read through to get rid of any mistakes and then I'll be posting it tomorrow, so keep an eye out and hopefully it should appear very soon (fingers crossed)!

Anyway, this is an extract from later on in the fic, which I don't think I've posted before. Hope you enjoy!

Tagging @ticketybooser , @harry-leroy, and @forcebros if any of you want to read this too. :D

George was just dealing out the cards for their first hand when the door to the parlour was flung roughly open, and into the room stepped the sour presence of Uncle Cary. Valentine’s happy smile slipped slightly at the man’s entrance, regarding his great uncle with none too friendly a look. That, George could not really blame him for. His uncle had done very little to endear himself to Valentine—quite the opposite, in fact, considering everything that had occurred—and besides, he couldn’t think of a person on earth whose temperament would have been improved by the prospect of having to associate with Cary.

“Have you not finished the packet for Falmouth?,” he heard the old man grouse as he gathered up his hand of cards into a neat pile and glanced through them. “You know that they must be ready for tonight so that they may sail tomorrow morn.”

Wordlessly, without looking up from his cards, George pointed over his shoulder to where the documents in question lay, completed and ready, on the small table across the room, beside his empty cup of tea. He heard a humph and a rustling of paper as Cary picked them up, glancing through them.

“Well, at least these appear to be satisfactory,” he conceded reluctantly. “But there are still a great many things which require your attention.”

He could feel his uncle’s eyes boring into the back of his skull, his disapproval upon seeing his nephew playing cards with his son rather than using such valuable times to further the interests of the Bank clearly expressed. George repressed a sigh, pursing his lips. So often in the past, he had simply let his uncle’s opinions on what he should and should not do govern him, but a glance up towards Valentine, who was looking rather crestfallen at the thought of being abandoned in the middle of their game in favour of his work, made his mind up. Not this time. This time, he would stand his ground.

“There is nothing so pressing that it must be dealt with immediately, or even today,” he replied in a tone that was deceptively mild. “I highly doubt that all we have built for ourselves will collapse the moment I take the time to play a game of whist or two with my son. And besides, Dr Enys has insisted that I not overtax myself, and he shall most displeased if he learns that I have ignored his instructions."

“Bah!” At this scornful exclamation, George did look up, a displeased frown drawing his brows together. “What does that quack know, I ask, if he really believes a few papers will bring you to death’s door? And since when have you ever been inclined to listen to such a man when there is work which must be done? Or perhaps you have other...distractions which have made the good doctor’s words suddenly more appealing to you.”

At this, he bestowed Valentine with a pointed glare, one which George himself had been accustomed to seeing directed at him as a child. When his uncle had elected to chastise him for bothering his father, that glare had been enough to send him scampering away to hide, but clearly Valentine was made of sterner stuff than he had been at seven years old, for he met Cary’s eye without blinking and with equal—if not greater—ferocity.

[tinyboxxtink]

"Black Magic" *Part 3*

Alright y'all this took me ALL day to write [the entire rest of the story] and it took me an hour and a half to just edit this chapter. So I HOPE you like it. I had to find a breaking point it was getting too long, but the next chapter is coming like...maybe 30 minutes.

EEK!!!

Part 4

Part 2

Tag List

@wanniiieeee

@word-scribbless

@milkshqke

@gibbs274

@chasingeverybreakingwave

@aprildecker-blog

@lolliepopsicle

@stars-in-the-skies-world

@omgsuperstarg

@stars-trash-18

@objection-argumentative

@madamsnape921

-------

After saying goodbye to Maria and the kids Rafael took your hand and you both got in another Uber he had called.

“So where to now?” You asked.

“Well we're going to need somewhere to get this food,” he smiled. “So I'm taking you to my favorite place in the city,”

Soon enough the Uber pulled up in front of Central park. We both got out and walked to the front entrance.

“Central Park is your favorite place in the city?” You asked. “Kind of basic but okay,” you teased.

“Shut up,” he laughed, punching you in the arm playfully. “Wait until you see what part of Central Park.” He took your hand and you walked for a bit until you came across a fountain.

“I mean it's gorgeous but still kind of basic,” you teased some more.

“This is where we're eating lunch carino,” he told you. “The surprise comes after,”

You set up camp on the edge of the fountain and spread out the food. It was enough for a feast. Luckily Maria had included napkins, plates , silverware and sneakily enough she snuck in an old blanket that you could spread out.

“Oh my god.. this is so good,” You said in between mouthfuls of food.

“I told you,” he laughed through a mouthful of his own food.

“No like you don't understand. I've never had food this good,” You insisted.

“Oh no? The fancy lunches from work, not your style?” He smirked.

You stopped eating for a second. Had he really noticed that you took home whatever food the bigwigs never finished? It was kind of a detail that you never had guessed that he would even pay attention to.

“I have no idea what you're talking about,” You innocently replied.

“Sureee…” Rafael nodded with a smile.

“I'm sorry, please don't fire me,” You begged.

“Fire you? I think it's adorable. Trust me I would do the same thing back in my law school days when I had nothing,” He patted your shoulder.

“God do I hear that,” You agreed.

“Wait so you have nothing?” Rafael asked, concerned.

“What? No! Kind of…..I have enough.” You assured him.” It's not like I'm homeless or anything.” Oh my God this is getting worse. “I just mean like, back when I was in college I had even less than I have now.”

“Oh you went to college?” Rafael asked.

“Wow okay counselor I see where the snobbishness is coming back,” You acted offended. And you actually kind of were.

"Oh no no no, mi amor,” He put a hand on your knee, scared he had offended you. “Please don't think that I would ever think down of you. I think you are the most beautiful, smartest caring person in the world.”

He didn't even know you. That was definitely the spell. You sadly shrugged” it's fine,”

“No no what I meant.. I don't know I don't know what I meant,” He shook his head, blushing.

“Yeah you do it's fine you can say it Rafael I'm not going to get offended,” You assured him.

“I just meant... I don't know, or don't understand why somebody with a college degree would be temping, instead of using their degree for a job in their field. I seriously doubt you went to college for temping,”

“Well I don't know if you remember this since it was eons ago before you had money but living in New York is quite expensive.” You half laughed. "And when you have student loans to pay you kind of have to take what you can get even if it's not in your ‘field’,”

“I get it,” He nodded. “I totally get where you're coming from. I'm so sorry I offended you,”

“You know before today I would have stomped off and written you off as just the snob pompous asshole that I thought you were. But after seeing where you came from I know you really mean that,” You smiled.

“So…” he hoped to change the subject. “What exactly is your degree in? Something law related I assume?”

“Why do you assume that?”

“Well.. usually the people that apply to be my intern are only interested in kissing my ass and getting ahead in the lawyer corporate world. But you haven't done that.. Yet,” He raised an eyebrow with a smirk.

“Oh.. yeah.”. you look down at the ground nervously.

“What are you going to kiss my ass now? Because I'll gladly let you do it,” He smiled cheekily.

“No no!” You waved your hands. “I mean that would be nice but--I mean no, what?” You were flustered.

“You're adorable when you're flustered,” He rubbed your bright red cheeks.

“Haha,” you pushed a hair behind your ear. You thought to yourself “Well he's not going to remember any of this anyway so you might as well tell him the truth,”

“Truth is.. I may or may not have manipulated the system to beat out those other snobby law students to get this job,” You admitted, still looking down.

“Really…?” He looked at you suspiciously. “...And why’s that?

“...Because I saw your picture on the file and I thought you were gorgeous and I wanted to see that face everyday,” You blushed intensely, still looking at the ground, not able to tell him in his face..

There was a very long pause and then he put a hand on yours. You slowly looked up at him and he was smiling cutely.

“That is the most adorable thing I've ever heard in my life,” He grinned.

“Really? You think so?” Well obviously he thought so he was programmed to think whatever you did for the adorable duh.

“Yeah I don't think I've ever had a woman try that hard to get my attention. Or want to see me that much, or even think that highly of me,” He grinned.

“I mean it's not really thinking highly of you, just that you’re really attractive,” You laughed.

“Right, of course,” He was blushing even more.

“And that was even before I saw your butt!” You laughed without thinking.. But he really did have the best ass you've ever seen in your entire life. Everyday you walked into that office you just wanted to take a bite of it.

Rafael choked on his food. “I um…” His face was red hot now.. “Thank you?”

“Anyway…” He tried to steer the conversation away from his butt. “You avoided the question,”

“What question?” You asked. Completely in all honestly forgetting what you were talking about. Once you got lost in Rafael's ass your mind kind of went blank completely.

“What iis your degree in?”

“It's embarrassing,” You looked at the ground.

“What? It can't be that bad,” He shook his head.

“Well I say it's embarrassing to someone like you,” You half laughed.

“Someone like me?” He looked offended. “What iis that supposed to mean?”

“I mean I don't.. I mean the person that I thought you were before today,” You grabbed his hand.

“Well you seem to have really disliked me before today,” he nodded curiously. “It's like you don't know me at all.”

“What? Of course I know you.” You assured him. "I love you, remember? And you love me?”

“Yeah.. I do, but I don't know anything about you,” He looked away as if he was trying to figure out an equation.

Oh shit. What's happening? Was this supposed to happen? Wasn't wearing off? Oh God.

“It's a theater degree!” you blurted out, trying to change the subject. Maybe it would work. If you distracted him maybe this would take over again.

He turned his head to the side and stared off blankly, as if he was rebooting. Then he looked up and smiled at you. “A theater degree? That sounds exciting!” He was back to his “usual self''..

You let out a sigh of relief. However, you wondered if you had gotten him out of the spell, would he have freaked out? Would he have accepted it? Would he maybe start having real feelings for you? Well, it was too late now.

“Does it really though?” You rolled your eyes.

“It really does. I don't know if you would believe this, but I'm kind of a theater nerd myself,” He chuckled.

“No way. You? Nahh,” You blew a raspberry.

“Seriously! I had a bit of a theater bug when I was younger in fact. I wanted to be a big Broadway star” He admitted.

You couldn't believe what you were hearing. Raphael Barba the stuffy ADA of New York City as a big Broadway star? Yeah right!

“That's insane! You laughed. So why did you give it up?”

“Well.. as you know, being on Broadway isn't a great way to make money. It's more of a passion thing right?”

“So true,” You nodded as you were eating your empanada dessert.

“So.. I took a hard look at where I lived, and how hard my mom and abuelita were struggling and I vowed that I would get out of El Barrio. And make something of myself and be able to take care of them when I was an adult the way that I couldn't when I was a kid,”

You felt tears choking your throat once again for the millionth time that day. But this time it wasn't for you. It was for him. You really hadn't known any of this, to you he was just a pretty face. You actually had a lot in common.

“That is so sweet.” You pushed the trash between you away and moved up closer, pulling his hands into your lap and looking at him endearingly.

“Yeah?” He asked you with a half smile like a kid looking for approval.

“Yeah it really is. You gave up your passion for your family. I wish I was as selfless as that,” You said softly.

“What do you mean?”

What did you mean indeed? Did you really want to get into the story? Then once again you reminded yourself that he would have no idea no recollection of this after today, so you felt comfortable telling him your secret.

“Well….. You.... I came from nothing too. But all I could think of was getting out myself and never looking back,” You admitted in shame.

“Oh?” He looked at you curiously.

“Yeah, I was really passionate about theater and becoming a big Broadway star. With all the fame, and the money, and getting away from my small town in Jersey. So I threw myself into every activity, every theater, every play, every community theater, every performance, anything I can get my hands on. My parents were super supportive and never thought anything bad of me, even though they probably should have. They wanted me to have the world. And I took that for granted,” You began to get choked up.

“Why do you say that…?” He took your hand and squeezed it feeling like something bad was coming.

“They saved up their entire married lives to give me a college fund. I wasn't aware of it, but when I got accepted to NYU School of acting, they told me that they had enough saved for the first two years,” You continued, trying to breathe.

“Well that's good isn't it?”

“Yeah no totally, except I wasn't grateful,” You look down tears stinging your eyes thinking about how selfish you are as a kid. All I could think about and yell at them was how they didn't have enough for the full four years. How was I supposed to be a big Broadway star if I was still trying to pay student loans?”

“Oh Y/N…”.

“Yeah and that's not even the worst part,” Tears started stinging your eyes. You were lucky he was under some spell because he would definitely hate you after this under normal circumstances.

“Go on, I'm not here to judge you,” He pressed his forehead against yours. He realized how hard the story was taking its toll on you.

“One day it was my big end of semester performance and it was snowing. So my parents said that they weren't going to be able to make it. I screamed at them and told them that this was the biggest night of my life, and they couldn't be bothered to show up and what horrible parents they were and that they never cared about me and a whole huge temper tantrum like a 3 year old.”

You tried holding back sobs you had to make it through this whole thing without breaking down.

“No, honey…” He put a hand on your face.

”And so they tried…” You sniffed. They tried driving on the icy roads of Jersey to drive into the City and they served on black ice in the Jersey tunnel where they hit the wall and were killed instantly.

“Oh my god.. he whispered, “Baby I'm so sorry,” He grabbed you in a hug as you broke down. You just sat there for a minute letting him hold you while you sobbed into his shoulder.

“I just told them what shitty parents they were!” You sobbed muffled into his shirt. "And I killed them!”

“Hey,” he pulled your face from his shirt and looked you in the eyes. “No no you didn't do anything,”

“Yes I did! If I hadn't been such a brat and told them and guilted them into coming to see my stupid show then they'd still be alive!” you kept sobbing.

“No,” he took your head in his hands. “Look I didn't know you back then but I'm sure that your parents loved you and I'm sure that you loved them. That's why you wanted them there so bad. And sometimes it's just people's time. You didn't do anything wrong. Do you understand me?”

“Yeah.. I guess so,” you looked down. “I mean I was punished enough for it”.

“What does that mean?”

“Well I mean, obviously I was distraught from my parents dying. And that semester was the last one that was paid for. So kind of lied to you,” You paused to look at him apologetically.

“I had to drop out one year after that because I could only get student loans for that next year. And you had to have a certain GPA to get them to keep paying for the last year and I most certainly did not have that,”

“Oh...carino, I'm so sorry”

“Then me being me the arrogant bitch that I am, I thought well maybe I don't need a degree. Tons of actors don't have degrees. They can just make it on their own. So I just started throwing myself into auditions for about a year and a half, and I ended up living on the streets because I refused to take any kind of job. Telling myself that I was going to get my big break and be famous,”

“Oh my God”

“I know, right?” You laughed through tears. “I'm so stupid,”

“Hey you are not stupid,” Rafael grabbed your hands again.

“Yeah well, the first temp agency that I applied to had the first job as a personal assistant to a fancy lawyer. So maybe I'm not that stupid,” you smiled.

“Ah.. see? Happy ending. Maybe you went through all that to find me,”

“Yeah.. maybe,” You sadly smiled at him.

Although you knew deep down in your heart that was bullshit, because you really didn't have him. All you did was take another shortcut and be selfish and tried to take him for yourself instantly without any of the work. You were still a selfish bitch. And he didn't know that

“You know...if it makes you feel any better, you are lucky to have such loving parents,”

“What do you mean? Didn't you say you gave up your dream to take care of them?” You assumed that must have meant they were super close.

“Yeah well, for my mom and abuela..”.

You suddenly realized he hadn't mentioned a father.

"Oh? I'm.... No dad?”

“No, no dad.” He shook his head sadly. “I wasn't completely honest with you earlier YN,”

“What do you mean?” You took his hand, already knowing this wasn't going to be good.

“I was forced to give up my dream,” he replied sadly while staring at the ground.

“What?”

“When I was a kid I would watch musicals at my abuelitas house. It was the only place I was….safe,” He continued.

“Oh God.” You muttered.

“I would dance and sing all over her house. She was the only person in my life who ever supported that side of me,” he continued to stare at the ground.

“When my dad came to pick me up one day and he saw what I was doing…. “ He stopped again, you realized he was trying not to cry.

“Rafa…..”

“He tried to "beat the gay out of me.",” You saw tears dripping on the pavement.

You silently gasped.

"Not that I'm gay,' he quickly assured you.

"That was literally the last thing on my mind baby," you shook your head, tears coming to your own eyes as you pulled him into a hug. He collapsed into tears as you rubbed the back of his neck and whispered comforting words into his ear.

Finally he composed himself enough to finish his story.

“Anyway, he uh...he didn't just beat me for that. It was anything really. But I kept at it at my abuelas. She encouraged me even if she couldn't stand up to my dad. I can't blame her or my mother. When my mom caught me still pursuing it she told me to stop if I wanted to keep our dad around saying he wouldn't tolerate a….f word son,"

“Oh my god.” You whispered. You couldn't imagine your parents or any parents really, trying to discourage their kids from anything, and threatening them for being something they were so passionate about.

“Well I guess it didn't matter either way because he ended up taking off anyway. And I felt so guilty that we lost our only income, so my mom had to end up getting two jobs and my abuela moved in to help with bills that then I swore to become better so that I could atone for my sins,” He couldn’t look at you.

“Oh my god. Rafa, sweetie I…. That wasn't your fault., it wasn't your fault at all. He sounds like a grade a asshole,” You made him look at you just as he did when you told your shameful story.

“He was...is. I don't know if he's dead or alive actually. I haven't seen or heard from him since he left. I hate him so much,” he clenched his fists.

“Oh honey,” You pressed a kiss to his forehead.

“No you don't understand. My middle name is Eduardo, named after him. So he's always with me. I have always told people it's Antonio, because I want nothing about me associated with him,” He started to cry again.

After a minute, he looked back up at you very seriously. “I've never told anyone that story.”

“Really? Not even Liv?”

"Not even Liv," He stroked your hair. "I've never felt as close to her as I do with you.” He pulled you into his lap. “The truth is Y/N I have never felt safe since my abuela’s house. Until I met you,”

“Rafa…” You pulled him into a deep kiss, tears dropped down both your faces. “We can be each other’s homes now,”

[honoraryplebeian]

After a month of struggling, I'm finally vibing some with writing today. I have managed to get down a bit over 3k words and am still going. Currently breaking for dinner though after realizing I only have had half a pot of highly caffeinated coffee and a sandwich today. We'll see how much further I can go. Ideal would be finishing. The chapters have averaged around 7k words each, so it would not be unreasonable if I can keep up the pace. Plus, I have a decent idea of where I want to go with it (although the second scene has turned out quite differently than I originally intended). We'll see. We'll see. Albeit, if I don't finish it tonight I will probably work on crack fic tomorrow since I do want to try to get it out for Valentine's Day.

Anyway, I am quite pleased with how the scenes are coming out in autopsy fic (Need is Not a Reason (I hate the name though, so I never refer to it as such in my head)). It looks like there are going to be about four or five scenes in it, and I have two done. I'll post the first scene below the cut for any who may want a little spoiler. Nothing graphic in this part, just Hashirama waking up Tobirama and them working through what happened.

Tobirama awoke to Hashirama shaking him the next day. There was a disconcerting moment where he did not understand what he was doing lying on a futon when he had just been drinking tea on the engawa with him, Madara, and Izuna. Hashirama kept asking him what happened and Tobirama immediately felt the cool sensation of iryo-ninjutsu over his brow when he let out a groan from the growing headache he could now feel. Had they all gone out drinking? He felt like he had a hangover. He rarely overindulged in drinking, but Izuna had a way of antagonizing him, no doubt due to their years as rivals. Izuna -

He jolted up into a seated position, barely giving Hashirama time to pull his hand back before colliding with his head. Izuna was dead. Had been for years. Tobirama cursed and put his fingers to the ground to stretch out his sensing as far as he could. Pushing past the headache Hashirama had only slightly soothed, no doubt a result of the genjutsu he had been put under, he searched for Madara’s chakra signature. It took time to search to the edges of his range, but it would be hard to miss such a distinctive signature as Madara’s. No matter how thoroughly he searched though, he could not find him.

“Anija, what time is it?” he asked, turning his head towards the window to see the light streaming in.

Hashirama pursed his lips, but held back the question he himself had for the moment, “It’s about ten in the morning.”

He and Madara would have arrived at his home some time after midnight. Even if he had left around one and had been traveling without stopping since then, he should still be within sensing range. Where could he have possibly gone? There were some areas that dampened his sensing, and it was also possible Madara was suppressing his chakra. How could he bring him back if he was incapable of even finding him?

But then, grimacing, he remembered the promise he made to Madara a year ago. He swore that he would not go after him if he chose to leave the village. That he would respect his choice no matter what decision he came to. Even if he could find Madara, did he have the right to bring him back to the village? Could Madara even be swayed by a man who couldn’t keep his word? He did not have the strength to force him back, and even if he took Hashirama with him it would only result in making Madara a prisoner in the village.

Hashirama, still crouching from when he was waking him, shifted closer and put his arm across Tobirama’s shoulders. Resting his head on Tobirama’s shoulder, Hashirama tilted his head until it rested against his. “You did everything you could, Tobi.”

Tobirama could feel himself tense under his brother’s reassurance. He had done everything he could, and it wasn’t enough. Part of him wanted to yell at Hashirama and demand he explain how that was meant to be comforting. How was he supposed to feel when he had invested all of himself into this gods forsaken mission and still failed? What else could he have done? But Madara had told him from the very beginning that he was the worst person for this mission. Perhaps it would have been better if he had never gone out to stop him. It would have been a cleaner departure for all involved.

Forcing himself to relax, he pushed aside his personal feelings on the matter. Hashirama had thought of Madara as a friend since childhood. Having only truly known the man for a year, it was unreasonable for Hashirama to have to comfort him. More than anyone else, Hashirama was the one devastated by Madara going through with his decision to leave. His brother needed him for support right now; he could deal with his own thoughts later.

Allowing Hashirama to keep his arm around him, he asked, “What do you need me to do?”

He could feel Hashirama’s head pull away from his, and in his peripheral vision he could see his brother looking at him. When after a few moments he did not turn to meet his brother’s gaze, Hashirama carefully pulled his arm back. Shifting so that he was now seated on the ground next to him with his legs pulled up against his chest, Hashirama softly requested, “Please look at me.”

The urge to sigh was difficult to fight off, so he instead closed his eyes for a moment as he slowly released the breath. Once finished, he turned towards his brother and raised a brow in question.

Corner of his mouth tucking in, Hashirama examined his face. Not bound to the same restraints as himself, Hashirama let out a sigh and closed his eyes. “Don’t shut me out, Tobirama. It’s ok…well, this situation isn’t, but it’s ok to allow yourself to feel hurt. I’m hurt too. I thought we were able to make him feel wanted, able to give him a reason to stay.” Hashirama’s voice cracked as tears started to fill his eyes. “You know, I didn’t think he was actually going to leave. He seemed. He seemed happy. I don’t understand. What else could we have done? I don’t know what we’re supposed to do now,” he admitted, head dropping to where his arms rested on his knees.

And Tobirama knew what they should be doing. They should be at the administrative building finding shinobi capable and trustworthy enough to take over Madara’s work load. They should be redrafting village defenses and patrol routes. They should be tracking Madara down to either bring him back to the village or eliminate him so that he could not reveal village secrets. There were many things that they were supposed to be doing at this moment, but he could not bring himself to voice those thoughts. Suggestions such as those would not bring his brother comfort, nor would he be capable of giving those necessities the attention they required. For now, all those responsibilities could wait.

Nearly silent sobs shook his brother’s form. It was not often that Tobirama initiated any sort of physical affection, but Hashirama needed him. Curled in on himself as he was, Hashirama was not in a position that welcomed comfort, but he reached out his hand and placed it on Hashirama’s shoulder anyway. When Hashirama looked up at him, face blotchy and nose runny from crying, he must have recognized the gesture for what it was because he did not hesitate in turning towards Tobirama and pulling him into a hug, and Tobirama did not hesitate in returning it.

He could not recall the last time he had seen his brother so affected. As he rubbed circles into Hashirama’s back in an attempt to soothe him, he was reminded of when Kawarama and Itama died. Madara was not dead though. Neither he nor Hashirama knew his plans for after he left the village. He wished he could suggest to Hashirama that he might return, that he did not need to mourn Madara as lost, but he did not want to give his brother false hope. Whatever Madara’s intentions, he had made his inability to stay in Konoha clear when he first tried to leave, so it was unlikely that he would return. With no words to offer, he simply remained in Hashirama’s embrace and took his own comfort in his brother’s presence.

[lutiaskokopelli]

(directed at you, not the characters) so i found tfs today and have now read the whole comic and all the lore explanations and can i just say... wow. everything about it is absolutely amazing. i may just not have been looking in the right places, but i’ve never seen a fan-story quite like this one. i’ve read plenty of fan-comics and seen plenty of ask blogs, of course, but none that merge the two like this. and boy, is this done well. i can tell how much effort you must have put into crafting this plot, and love the balance of humour and seriousness you’ve found. the way you draw the action scenes (and everything else) is stunning, and your characterisation is fantastic. i could gush about this for pages and pages but it would ultimately boil down to: tfs is great and thank you so much for making it. and by the way, this is all from someone who usually doesn’t read/like self-insert type things. maybe i’ll have to give them another go, if they can be as great as this one. anyway, i hope youre having a fantastic day/night, and remember to stay hydrated!

After so long, finally I can answer. I’m so sorry your wholesome ask stayed in my inbox for so long, the past week was kinda hectic and I absolutely wanted to take time to answer you properly :’)

Anyway, that being said... Thank you. So, so much! First off, reading all the lore posts as well as the comic itself takes some dedication! I know I posted a few links in the AO3 version of the comic, but apart from the two must-read rule posts I gave separate links for, I didn't really expect readers to be like me and binge-read the entirety of the blog besides just the story itself, haha.

Thanks for your compliments on the comic! I doubt TFS is as unique as you think -- ask blogs with a plot are far more common than I initially thought (if you’re familiar with the Henry Stickmin games, then I highly recommend that you also take a look at Ending the Cycle), and the base concept of TFS is based off any of the countless Nuzlocke fanfics/comics that have been made in the Pokémon fandom. But as far as I know, it's the only one of its kind in the Hollow Knight fandom at least! Its concept and writing is not to everyone's taste, as is any story in general, but I'm glad and extremely thankful that it can still bring joy, laughs and feelz to so many readers.

The effort is in it, true, but I'll maintain that what makes the core of TFS' "talent/uniqueness"(?), besides just me being passionate and dedicated, is most of all a whole lot of experience -- especially when it comes to finding the right balance between humor and angst/seriousness. I've written stories online for a bit more than a decade by now, counting at least four full-fledged, so-long-and-plot-heavy-they-could-have-ten-seasons-and-a-movie-on-Netflix stories, of which TFS is the fourth and last to date (also out of those four, only the first was completed, whoops (and even then I wanted to rewrite it but the remastered version only covered the first half of the series). TFS is still ongoing, and the other two were just too plot-heavy even for me to handle lmao). So all that to say, I had all that time to figure out exactly what ambience I want for my stories, experiment here and there (especially in writing, in many of my older fanfics I would write some specific chapters by adding some rules or trying new things such as writing from an unexpected POV and such), until I found the balance I wanted -- and the best ways to break it every now and then, just to throw off my readers. Don't get too comfy in there, a few times in the past I had some readers tell me that my writing made them literally fall off their chairs :p

Funny story, I have a lot more confidence in my writing than in my drawing skills for some reason, even while English isn't even my native language xD Probably because it's hard to spot anatomy errors in writing, haha. But thanks! I'm starting to like my drawing style and I'm seeing my progress every now and then, so with that and the fact that drawing characters doing funny and/or epic stuff is highly satisfying, I'm having a blast writing/drawing TFS!

And lastly, I feel you a LOT on the "I'm someone who usually doesn't read/like self-insert type things", as I used to be / still kinda am one myself! Then again, it's just hard for me to find stuff I can read/watch and enjoy without having my inner critic go around and spot out every trope in general, of which the “self-insert” genre is just one out of so many. Seeing a trope that is done well and/or in a surprising way is incredibly satisfying to read, that's when you have me cheering; but when it’s used “raw” with little to no self-awareness of it being a trope and how this trope can be used, it becomes frustrating, or even infuriating at times, especially when it renders the story predictable. (Worst case scenario has both: tropes are used badly and at such consistent rate that just by seeing one small hint, one split-second later you've already predicted exactly what is going to happen if this trope too follows the same bad writing logic as the previous ones, and then when it lands exactly as predicted it's just the worst. I don't want to throw any punches for gratuitous violence, but... The one event when this exact scenario happened wasn't a fanfiction/fancomic. It was the SU movie, at the very least up until the last fifteen minutes or so.)

TL;DR, Tropes Are Tools, they aren't inherently good or bad to use -- the way they are used is what makes them work or fail in a given context. Self-Inserts are notoriously bad because 90% if not all self-insert stories come from a self-indulgent story about yourself by definition, and I’d be hypocritical if I dared pretend that TFS didn’t start like one as well (at the very least, my other heavily meta fanstory Learn When to Quit is even more heavily Self-Insert based due to its plot and themes). Sadly, a majority of the authors of those stories want to keep the self-indulgent part (or don’t have the heart to remove it, it’s usually the latter) without adding any twist to it, or by adding twists to it that only make it even more self-indulgent, I guess.

I think that what would make both of my Self-Insert-character-turned-OCs work ("work” being a subjective term, very little things in fiction can work for every single reader on the planet), is that I was able to separate them from myself early enough and turn them into actual characters who can sometimes or oftentimes disagree with me as a person -- it’s usually easier to be less lenient on what insane stuff is thrown at a character if that character isn’t you personally, after all (despite how I pacifistic I am in nature and how I’d never dare do any of the things I do to my characters to actual people. I only ever have bad stuff happen to my characters because the plot needs it and (sometimes) because a point needs to be made). Once the Self-Insert-character-turned-OC is given the exact same treatment as any other character in the story, and now that they don’t take all the spotlight, it leaves enough space for what I actually want to talk about within those stories. Short version: if the Self-Insert character is treated like a random NPC with a “somewhat unusual backstory” instead of like “the One who knows everything about this world’s past, present and future and has the Infinite Benevolence to Solve Every Problem”, it gives more space for the other NPCs to exist and interact on equal terms, and it gives more space for actual plot stuff to occur normally. To me, the biggest trait an author needs to tone down the most in a Self-Insert character is just how much knowledge they have over the world they’re in. If the SI character knows everything about the videogame and has too little too many “lucky guesses” regarding headcanons the author has that occur in the story but didn’t show up in the game, you know you’re doing something wrong -- there’s no room for error, therefore no room for proper plot, if the SI character knows so much they can play detective and predict everything. My two takes to solve this “omniscient SI character” problem are to either 1) have the SI character be relatively new to the fandom -- they know the basics, but can still remember stuff wrong or don’t know everything to every detail; it helps a lot when the fandom’s canon content, like in Hollow Knight, is vague enough to let a lot of room for interpretation, because in that case, even if the SI character were to know “everything” regarding the fandom canon, what if they just so happened to have interpreted a few things the wrong way just because they weren’t on the “right” side of the fandom’s debate? The other option, which is a bit less appealing to me but not too uninteresting either: 2) the videogame’s world is uncannily close to what is depicted in the videogame the SI character knows, but too little too different to have the SI character assume things based on the videogame they know, only to make fatal mistakes. I used this in my Undertale fanfic Learn When to Quit because the simple fact of trying to implement functioning laws of physics out of a videogame where NPCs have videogame stats and having turn-based fights is bound to create quite a few discrepancies with the “100% canon videogame lore”; luckily, the Uncanny Valley effect was exactly what I was going for in this fanfic.

To the factual “SI character has played the game and therefore knows everything about this videogame world’s past, present and future” trait of the SI character, I’d also like to add the thankfully often tackled well (to an extent) moral trait of the, let’s say, “hard truth” that is at the core of these SI stories: ”the videogame and its characters are actually real." It’s a simple sentence to say, but usually has very deep and harsh consequences morality-wise within the stories: unintentional(?) voyeurism is the one that is probably common to every fandom subject to Self-Insert stories. Now, I’d have little to say about this one because at least half of the SI stories I know do tackle it according to the author’s level of maturity (I obviously won’t expect a 13-year-old author writing their first fanfic to write essays about existential crisis material); but the one criticism I usually keep in mind is that in most cases, only one or two characters will ever discuss the topic in-depth, while the other characters either aren’t aware of this Hard Truth, ignore the topic, or in the worst cases, somehow, use this Hard Truth in some way to be mean to SI character so that the other NPC can support them. (Just throwing a wild guess as to the identity of the two characters who will talk most about this Hard Truth: Self-Insert character and the one Videogame NPC the author happens to have chosen as their favorite character. Heck, I’m calling myself out right now because TFS starts out basically with that lmao, what with Player being the obvious one and Quirrel being my favorite HK character xD (as well as an “asker favorite”, quoting one asker in person word for word).)

If you’d like, I can give a few more details on each story separately so you can have more down-to-earth examples to the theoretical stuff I’ve said so far, and to contrast how two Self-Insert stories can tackle things in a variety of ways and have plots that are nothing alike despite the original concept ”Player gets stuck inside Videogame world against their will" being exactly the same to the letter:

For the Undertale fanfic Learn When to Quit, I’ve mostly been trying (emphasis on “trying”) to do a Deconstruction of your classic "player gets trapped inside videogame” story, by focusing on how the Player’s world interacts with the Videogame’s world. Where most of these stories will go “hehe and now Self-Insert plays with the characters and saves the world and then everybody is happy, Self-Insert doesn’t miss reality all that much after all”, LWtQ chooses the different take to at least have the Self-Insert character still try to contact her family and wish to go home, and on the other side the player’s family is actually depicted trying to look for their missing child. As it turns out, the player character was kidnapped by a character from the videogame, and since the player disappeared suddenly and against their will: the player has reasons to want to go home and be apprehensive towards the videogame world (and the Uncanny Valley effect I talked about earlier only enhances the SI character’s distress and distrust over the videogame’s world and inhabitants, which by itself generates a sub-plot that isn’t just your typical cheap quiproquo because the readers themselves are led to question whether or not they can trust the videogame world); the family and friends are insanely worried, therefore the police is involved and tries to investigate; and the videogame character who kidnapped the player in the first place is overwhelmed because they didn’t anticipate many of the consequences to their actions, due to their limited knowledge of how the player’s world works. I won’t pretend that LWtQ is the only fic that ever did/will do that, but out of all the fanfics I’ve ever read so far, there’s only two others I can remember that gave some screen time to the SI character’s relatives/friends in a similar situation, if at all. And on top of that: the story focuses not on just one (1) SI character; sure, only one ends up in the videogame world, but there’s still a dozen who all interact and know each other as well as the SI character who disappeared, and each of these player characters have their own families and friends and have their own separate lives apart from the videogame. Throughout the story, many characters from both the player’s world and the videogame’s world are eventually destined to face the same Hard Truth (”the videogame and its characters are actually real" / “In another world, our universe is just a videogame and the reason why we have a genocidal human problem is because the ones who play the game are kids who have no idea what they’re doing”), truth to which they all react in vastly different ways-- all of which are (hopefully) reactions real people would have if they were in the respective characters’ situation.

In TFS, I put a lot less thought behind the whole SI problem, namely because I had far less ambitions on this comic than I did on LWtQ -- heck, it just started as a parody with little to no plot besides my notes on how the original playthrough went, the only reason I started this comic was because I wanted to draw a comic but didn’t want to bother with a complex plot, for a change. So I guess that what makes the SI character work anyway is the fact that I was able relatively fast to shift the focus of the story on other characters besides just the Player, through the excuse of letting the readers interact with some other NPCs as well, without the Player being present or even aware of it. The Hard Truth “the videogame and its characters are actually real” is only known by one side (Player and the readers/askers) and isn’t shared by the bugs (yet?), so it isn’t given as much focus as, simply, the interactions between characters and the readers, and between the characters themselves. On top of that, this Hard Truth isn’t even applied the same way as in the UT fanfic: in LWtQ, the fact that players played Undertale had actual consequences in the LWtQ version of the Underground (aka killing a random pixelated NPC on your PC actually kills a real monster in the LWtQ version of the Underground), and on top of that a number of Undertale characters already know that the videogame exists as soon as the fanfic starts -- hence lots of meta talks, angst and many, many moral/existential crises (as well as memes, of course. Always.); in TFS, Hallownest is just Hallownest and the videogame is just a videogame, and both exist within the same multiverse simply because of the stupid reason “What is a coincidence among the infinity of the multiverse?” (the bad math transcription would be “what is zero times infinity? Depending on the infinity you choose, I guess it can give you a probability of 100%”). It doesn’t mean that TFS won’t also have the Hallownest bugs also learn about the videogame and possibly have some existential crisis material to some extent, especially given the asks Quirrel has been getting; but it just isn’t nearly as much the core of the plot as it was in LWtQ. In TFS, the core of the plot is... wait, sorry, what plot again? (oh yeah right there’s a lot of questions to answer, but that’s just backstory and worldbuilding, that’s not a plot)

Anyway I kept adding digression to digression because I wanted to tackle every point you made, and I’m so sorry that the end turned into an essay about Self-Insert stories fjkdlsmqjgklmjgksdqlm

But the core of the message is a big THANK YOU! TFS may be great because of my hard work and past experiences with other stories that came before it, but it wouldn't be even half as great if I didn't have all of you guys backing me up with constant asks, most of which renew both my interest in making the story and my capability to jump off any opportunity to bring out new plot ideas within minutes! TFS is my first real ask blog, so with your wholesome participation combined with my experience as the plotter type of author (read "I will not write a single line of text in this fanfic before I haven't first figured out to the letter how the plot goes from start to end" type of author), it's bound to be an interesting cocktail! I've been learning to plot faster, more efficiently, and to accept to delete at least some ideas if they happen to become obsolete. All in all, I see this as some great teamwork! And for that, I want to send y'all a big applause and a ton of thank-yous <3

[dracothedeatheatingcupcake-ao3]

(Word from you WIP thing.)

Has anyone done Sleep and/or Doze (As in. "Doze off ") yet? :-)

Not yet! Sleep is a good one, with a lot of examples. The section I chose has a lot of instances, so I'll do this one. I only had 2 instances of the word doze, and one was in the first chapter of TPWM which I technically already published, so I'll go with the second one, ha.

Also, I have some of my indications for italics that I'm leaving in these sections, since it's taking me a while to manually get rid of them, so sorry about that. It's just easier for me to use slashes to indicate italics when writing on my phone than try and remember where I want emphasis when editing later, ha.

send me a word & i’ll post a sentence from my WIP that contains that word

Sleep: (C.W. There is a mild sexual scene in this section, nothing graphic, but Mondo is a vulgar individual, so... yeah.) Soon they are getting ready for bed, not needing to talk about it as Taka heads to the bathroom and gets ready for bed first. Taka usually does when they sleep over. He’s glad that the kid remembered their promise to sleep over tonight, honestly. With how off Taka has been, he wasn’t sure if he would or not. At least now he doesn’t have to be all pathetic and ask again, heh…

It doesn’t take the kid long to finish, since he’s so fucking clinical with his routines. Now that he knows the kid doesn’t, uh… ya know… it makes sense that he doesn’t spend ages in the shower like Mondo does whenever Taka sleeps over. He pushes that thought right on out of his head given how fucking stupid it is and instead focuses on smiling at Taka as he passes the kid exiting the bathroom while he enters it. The kid’s smile is strained, but Mondo pretends he doesn’t see it. Fuck, does he hope this gets resolved soon… he’s not ready for this shit to end…

It doesn’t take him long to undress and enter the shower, Mondo letting out a happy sigh as the warmth assaults him. It’s just shy of being scalding, just the way he likes it. As he stands under the spray, he bites his lip and contemplates if he should, you know… jerk off or not. On one hand, it’s good to get that shit out of the way so that he doesn’t make anything awkward later. On the other hand… it’s still fucking awkward jerking off when he knows Taka is in the other room. Especially given the weird ass thoughts he’s been having today…

Shit. But if he /doesn’t/, then that runs the risk of him getting a fucking boner when in bed with Taka, which would be even more awkward, honestly. Plus, he can’t deny that he’s kinda tense right now, with the worry over Taka and all…

With a soft sigh, he reaches down and grabs his dick in his right hand, biting his cheek to keep the fucking moan in. He’s done this a couple times since Taka started sleeping over, but it’s still awkward to force himself to go faster than he usually likes. It’s worth it to be able to hold the kid at night, but still. It kinda fucking sucks.

It also doesn’t help that his stupid ass brain keeps wanting to think of Taka as he’s jerking himself. He’ll start off with a normal fucking fantasy, with another chick going down on him or something, and then something will happen and suddenly it’s fucking /Taka/ on his knees before him and- shit. Whatever. He immediately cuts the fantasies off as soon as they come, but it makes it hard to find a rhythm when he’s constantly cutting into his fucking fantasy, goddamnit. But he refuses to think of his kyoudai that way. He just… even if he /were/ gay, that shit is just… yeah. No. While he doesn’t agree with Taka’s assessment that it’s ‘immoral’ to think of someone while jerking off, he can’t deny that thinking of /Taka/ while jerking off feels very wrong. Almost like a betrayal of the kid’s trust or something. He highly doubts that Taka would appreciate anyone thinking of him that way, given his beliefs. And he refuses to betray Taka’s trust in any way possible, even if Taka has no way of ever finding out. Plus, he’s, ya know… not gay and all…

Anyway…

He eventually manages to finish, his body relaxing as the tension cuts off from his body. A little, at least. It’s not perfect, but it’s better than it had been, shit. He quickly finishes his shower after that, doing his usual routine for his hair to keep it healthy. Once he’s done, he shuts the water off and heads into the bathroom proper to dress himself.

He finds himself hesitating as he pulls his tank on, though he’s not entirely sure why. He’s just going to see Taka again before they head to bed together. The fuck is he feeling /nervous/ about? Yeah, part of him is worried that Taka is still all unhappy about whatever was bugging him earlier, but… shit. The kid would tell him. If he’s upset. Right? No, he’s never had the kid promise he would, but… shit. Whatever. It’s gonna be fine. And if Taka is actually letting him go and is planning to leave soon, then… that’s fine, too. This was inevitable, he’s always known that, and it’s just… it’s gonna be fine. No point ruining however much time he has left with pathetic things like self-pity, for Christ’s sake.

Ignoring the ache in his chest, he exits the bathroom and can’t help but smile when he sees Taka working on that fucking literature essay. They have exams all the following week, so it doesn’t honestly surprise him to see the kid working. He’s more surprised the kid hadn’t tried to do his work during their picnic or something, heh. He’s not started his essay, but he thinks he actually has an idea for how to write it. Which is… honestly baffling, but Taka has still been tutoring him in most of their classes, so maybe some of it is finally rubbing off on him or something. Shock of all shocks, he knows.

He smiles at Taka as the kid finally looks up at him, heart lurching at the smile the kid gives him. It still seems a little off, but he is doing all he can to ignore that as he heads over to the bed, lying down in the middle like he usually does. His eyes track Taka as he pads through the room to turn the lamp off like always, feeling so fucking soft inside. And when Taka approaches the bed and carefully gets in, like he always fucking does… shit. It’s so good. Nothing beats this, he’s sure. All of this. This day… god, it’s been so fucking /good/. Even with all the shitty parts, like Daisuke being his usual bastard self, and Taka’s strangeness, and his fuck up with the cookies… this was still an amazing fucking day. He just hopes Taka feels similarly. God, does he hope that.

It takes him a little while, but eventually Mondo is able to drift off to sleep, faster than he ever is able to do it without Taka. There’s just something about holding onto the kid that soothes him so fucking much. Like the kid is a fucking balm to all his worries, shit.

It does concern him a little that he doesn’t hear Taka’s soft breathing that usually indicate he’s asleep as he drifts off, but that’s prolly not a problem. He’s just making mountains out of molehills, he’s sure of it.

And if not…

Well.

This all was so fucking nice while it lasted.

(From chapter 15, companion to chapter 16.)

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Doze: Mondo doesn’t know how long he lies there holding Taka in his arms, watching the kid as he sleeps (yes, he’s being creepy as fuck, /no/, he doesn’t fucking care) before he feels the kid start shifting subtly, making soft noises as he burrows deeper in Mondo’s warmth. Mondo doesn’t mind it, allows it easily, and he can tell the kid is waking up because his breathing gets a little less even than it had been in sleep. With a fond smile, he leans down a little and whispers in the kid’s ear, delighting in the way he shudders, the motion radiating down Mondo’s entire body oh, so pleasantly.

“Mornin’, kyoudai,” he whispers, feeling so very, very content. God... how the fuck can this actually be his life...

“M-Mondo...” the kid mutters sleepily back, sounding- s-sounding /content/ and shit. F-fuck... god, this feels so fucking good... the fuck did he do in life to deserve this wonderful boy...? He can’t help how he chuckles, the laugh soft and quiet in the still morning air. He’s just... god. /Happy/. It’s early as shit, not that he doesn’t usually wake early due to nightmares and shit, and he’s never felt so fucking happy before. God...

However, he can tell the exact moment the kid fully wakes and realizes the shit Mondo himself had slowly realized as he’d woken that morning. It makes his heart clench softly, and he tightens his arms around the kid, hoping to make him feel better about this, god.

“Shhh... shh, Kiyo, it’s okay... relax, bro, it’s okay,” he rumbles softly, nuzzling the kid gently as he goes. And he doesn’t know why he keeps calling him that, by the way. The nickname he gave the kid spur of the moment in the sauna. But... but he... well. He kinda likes it. Something just for /them/. They can have Taka as his everyday name, and- and /Kiyo/ as his special, Mondo only name. If... if the kid wants that, heh.

But he pushes those thoughts out of his head when he feels Taka relax against him, still looking so fucking tired. It’s only 6:17, they have a little time until Taka usually wakes (6:30, he thinks he recalls the kid saying once a little while ago), so the kid can sleep a bit more if he wants. Mondo will make sure to wake him when it’s time to get up. He has to look after the kid, after all. It’s his job as big bro.

“Yeah, that’s better. We gotta get up soon. ‘S almost 6:30. Ya wake up ‘round then, yeah? Recall ya mentionin’ that a bit ago, heh. But we got some time. Rest. I’ll wake ya when it’s time ta get up, don’t worry.”

With that said, the kid relaxes fully again, snuggling down into Mondo’s arms again, not saying anything else. Not that any words are needed, really. Mondo lets him, offering no protest (like he’d ever protest this shit, god), feeling so very content as he holds his amazing and precious as fuck kyoudai. He even finds himself fucking /humming/ as he holds the kid, some English lullaby his bro used to sing for him when he’d been young to help him sleep.

It’s so fucking nice, being here. Holding Taka. Feeling his breath, soft and even, as it puffs out against his breast, goosebumps all over his skin. Watching him as he dozes, still so soft and pliant and just... /amazing/. Precious. /Everything, fucking everything./

There is no one on this planet who matters more to Mondo more than this kid, now. He is Mondo’s whole fucking world, and it should scare the shit out of him, and it /does/, it so fucking does, but... it don’t matter. He’s said it before, and he’ll say it again, because it /doesn’t matter/. Not at all, really.

When Mondo notices that the clock on the wall says 6:29, the time Taka will have to wake and head back to his room to prepare for the day looming closer and closer, he... he can’t help how he tightens his arms around the kid, strangely reluctant to ever, /ever/ let go. He knows he was always going to have to, eventually, but he... god, he doesn’t want to. Taka... Taka means the world to him, now, and it’s gonna be torture being apart from him, even a little. And he has to, would never /dream/ of keeping this kid from his goals and plans and dreams, but he... shit. Shit. Shit.

For now, things are good. Who knows what the fuck will happen later? Later today, tomorrow, next week, next month, next /year/. Who knows if Mondo will be able to keep from fucking this up like he so desperately wants, or if he- he will /fail/, like he always fucking fails. He hopes he won’t, hopes he’ll be good enough to hold onto this, but... fuck. Just... fuck.

But, his point is... that shit will come later. The long term. The knowledge that this can’t fucking last. That... that is a problem for Future Mondo. Present Mondo, though? He can just worry about Taka and about being the best fucking big bro he can possibly be.

And that? Is fucking that.

[shaynawrites23]

Modified Sentence

Pairing: Loki Laufeyson x reader

Header by the talented @summer-writes! She’s also an incredibly talented writer (in case you couldn’t tell from her url 😉) so go check her out!

Word count: 1448

Prompt: “Please. Don’t do this. Don’t break my heart.”

Written for @iliveiloveiwrite’s writing challenge!

When you first heard of the Allfather's decision, you staggered backwards into the wall from shock. He planned to imprison the prince, your love, your reason to live, for the rest of his life, however long that may be.

You sent the maid away in a breathy voice after she helped lower you into a chair, barely noticing as she scurried out of the room. You knew your fiancé had done bad things, but you loved him nonetheless. He deserved to be punished, but he did not deserve this. You’d heard of people who were sentenced to life imprisonment, and it was almost always a stepping stone to banishment. You’d never see him again.

"No," you whispered in horror.

You didn't know how long you remained there, frozen in your seat. What you did know was that you had to fight this. No way were you gonna let him go without a struggle. Without Loki, your life would have no meaning. They might as well execute the two of you. Together.

Stalking over to your wardrobe, you flung open the doors. You'd be damned if you let this go. Smirking to yourself, you let your fingers run over the skirts of the many beautiful gowns Loki had supplied you with, insisting it was 'his pleasure' and he 'loved seeing you in them anyway.'

You stopped when you came to a gorgeous emerald green dress with golden highlights. It had a golden waistband from which flowed a shimmering, transparent green layer, covering the other two skirt layers only for the hem to halt abruptly right before it touched the floor. The opaque fabric stopped right above your bosom, the transparent fabric taking over from there until it reached your wrists. The bodice sported fine golden lines in elegant swirls.

You smiled. It had always been his favorite and therefore you loved it as well. You loved seeing the admiration in his eyes as you made the silver-tongued god speechless.

Pulling it from its hook, you hurried to the bathroom adjoining the room you shared with your lover, hastily changing into the elegant gown. You slipped on a pair of golden heels and called a maid, requesting an audience with the Allfather and his wife.

You twirled in front of the mirror, inspecting every curve and line of your body. The skirt flared out as you spun and you grinned. Fully decked out in your prince's colors, you were convinced you'd make quite the statement.

The maid returned, informing you Odin and Frigga would see you, and that there was someone else who wished to see you and was standing outside waiting.

Your curiosity got the better of you and so you trotted out into the hallway only to come face to face with none other than Sigyn.

Hell no.

"Good morning, (Y/N). I trust you slept well?" She purred, eyes glancing down at your attire.

"What do you want, Sigyn?"

"Oh, only to tell you how sorry I am about what happened."

"You? Sorry? I highly doubt it." You crossed your arms, leaning against the doorway. Every time you crossed paths you ended up in a fight and boy, were you in the mood for one today. "Wait a minute, what are you sorry about?"

"What? About Prince Loki's sentence of course," she scoffed.

"How do you know about that? That's not public information, in fact, only Odin, Frigga, Thor, Loki and myself were told." You gasped suddenly as the realization struck you. "You were in on this! You convinced them to punish him like that!"

"You think I did that? Have you forgotten how much I care for Loki as well?"

You growled, hands clenching into fists at your sides as you slowly backed her into the wall opposite you. "You conniving witch! You were jealous that Loki picked me over you!"

"How dare you!" She gasped, and if looks could kill, you'd be long dead.

"How dare I? How dare you, going to such lengths just because he doesn't love you! Well guess what? I'm going to fight this sentence until my dying breath." With that, you turned on your heel, marching down the numerous halls until you reached the throne room.

You paused before entering, mentally reflecting on your plan. Should you be angered, protesting against this injustice? Or should you play the part of the heartbroken lover, playing on their sympathies?

Biting down lightly on your lip, made your decision, giving the guards a nod and they opened the doors for you, announcing your arrival in a stentorian voice.

You kept your strides short, bowing your head lightly as you knelt in front of the throne in a respectful greeting.

"Good day, Lady (Y/N). Speak your mind."

Frigga, seated next to her husband, sent you an encouraging smile.

"Milord, as you may have guessed, I am here to plead on behalf of my fiancé, Prince Loki. I agree that he has done terrible things, but this punishment is unjust and uncalled for. I am here to beg you to rethink this sentence."

"Lady (Y/N), as an Asgardian, you must know that I cannot possibly recall my sentence. As ruler of Asgard, my word is final, and Loki deserves everything he gets."

"With all due respect, milord, Loki does not deserve this. He has a good heart, but he was led to believe he had no choice in the matter. He made these decisions with the urge to protect Asgard and its inhabitants. I beg of you, Allfather. Give Prince Loki another chance."

"Loki's punishment was just. He will be imprisoned for the rest of his days."

It may have been your imagination, but it seemed you were angering the king. If you weren't careful, he could throw you out before you finished.

The door opened, and Sigyn marched in, wearing a wild, evil grin. A handful of guards trailed behind her, with a heavily chained Loki between them.

No. Don't get distracted.

"Please, milord, I'll do anything you ask if you just let my prince go. Please, lighten his sentence."

You didn't miss the hope in your sweetheart's eyes. Unfortunately, Odin seemed hell-bent on crushing it.

"Loki has been charged with treason against the kingdom. That's not a light crime. My decision remains in place. Lady (Y/N), unless you cease this begging, you face the same sentence." His booming voice filled the room and you fought the urge to flinch at the volume.

"Please, milord, I beg of you. Don't do this. Don't break my heart. Please." Tears filled your eyes and you blinked them back, but one trailed down your cheek anyway.

The Allfather opened his mouth to argue, but Frigga interrupted him. They exchanged hushed whispers, conversing so quietly you couldn't follow. You glanced at Loki. It broke your heart to see him like that, limbs chained and guarded on all sides, plus some sort of ancient artifact to prevent him from doing magic.

He offered you a smile, as if to assure you that he'd be okay, no matter the outcome. How could he still be so strong, even in the face of what might as well be death? Everyone believed him to be weak, the weaker of the two princes, but in reality he was as strong as they came.

“It’s okay” he mouthed. “I love you.”

“I love you too,” you mouthed back, subtly blowing him a kiss.

“It appears we have decided.”

You held your breath, turning your head to meet Odin and Frigga’s eyes, the latter smiling. Whether it was out of joy or sympathy, you couldn’t tell.

“Loki’s sentence shall be reduced to house arrest with Lady (Y/N) appointed to watch over him. He shall be required to assist the court with any issues it may have, and with any assets he may have. He will also be allotted time for himself and for his beloved, and his title as Prince of Asgard shall be restored, as well as all its duties and privileges.” Frigga announced. “Guards, remove his chains.”

You gasped in relief and happiness, glancing at Loki. As soon as he was free, he embraced his mother tightly, and you teared up again at the sight.

You heard a growl behind you and spun around just in time to see Sigyn stalking out of the room, footsteps loud and sharp.

“(Y/N), love.”

Loki stood before you, hand outstretched to help you up. You ignored it, jumping up and wrapping your arms around him with a sob. He clutched onto you just as hard as you did, rubbing comforting circles on your back.

“Don’t cry, love. I’m alright.”

This is my first time writing for Loki, and while he doesn’t appear a until late in this one shot I hope he’s in character! I also had multiple scenarios in mind for this prompt, but I liked this one best. I hope you enjoyed!

[seatosomert]

Street Photography...my New therapy.

Now you guys who've been here a while will already know about my love for Street Photography.

Just of late I've been dealing with some significant work stress.

I'm meditating and getting outdoors. I usually exercise regularly in the gym but I've not been for a week now.

I've needed something else to immerse myself into and take my mind away from the stresses at work.

I've chosen to throw myself into more Street photography.

I've been reading what I can only describe as one of the best self help books I've read. I'm sure the author Sean Tucker intended this book for other means, yet I say self help because it is self help for creatives.

In writing this book Sean has helped me to do some real soul searching and I've made some discoveries along the way.

I've leapt out of a creative rut, discovered my photographic Raison D' Etre and I've started to connect with my photography in an entirely new way. And it feels great.

I've let go of my, probably unhealthy connection with Social Media for a more casual relationship. I've started to invest more time in helping others by getting back into coaching again.

In essence I've completely fallen back, head over heels, in love with my photography again. But this time without the baggage that has us doubting ourselves or comparing ourselves to others too often.

We all do it.

The book is a mix of philosophical narrative, which Tucker presents with a gentle, non-patronising delivery. He writes with an honesty and degree of vulnerability that allows the reader to truly connect with his story. One which some of us share in many aspects.

However, where this book differs from all others about improving your photography let's say, is that it's applicable to all creatives.

Indeed it doesn't focus on photography, but instead talks about just being creative and the struggles we can all face. Then he begins to unwrap some of this and gives you some suggestions on how to unpack your creative blocks let's say, re-organise your priorities (pretty much you as a person really) in a conversational manner rather than a list of what to do and what not to do.

It's also a bit of an auto biography for Tucker. And what an interesting and varied life he has led.

Anyway. I tell you this not to try and sell you his book (although I can HIGHLY recommend it), but instead to explain to you how I have refocused my creative attention and some of the tools I've used to do this. It's got me into a much better place creatively. This book was the significant catalyst.

Zone Focusing...the street photogs secret weapon.

I've gone back to shooting on the Sony a6300 for now when shooting street scenes. The articulating screen is great for this genre and as I have been using some 7Artisans manual focus lenses (25mm f/1.8 and 55mm f/1.4) I've been using the superior Peak focusing in the Sony a6300.

However. Today I was using zone focusing. This is where you set your aperture and focus point so that you have. A zone within which any subject entering that zone will be in acceptable focus.

The advantage of this method is that you set your focus and aperture then you shoot. You can also preset your shutter speed and just switch ISO to auto and then just focus on what's going on around you and composition. It's the fastest possible way you can shoot. Yes, it's even faster than the fastest AF, because you see, you shoot, you move on. That's it.

It's a truly liberating way to shoot and before anyone even notices you you're done and gone.

It's great and I highly recommend it.

If anyone wants me to go into this more and talk through how this is done, comment on the post and I'll sort something for you guys.

So here are some more shots, all of which have been shot with the focus zone method.

I have to say, I went to meet a pal for lunch today and so went to the city an hour early and shot for an hour before our meet.

It was easy to fit in and it was so therapeutic just pointing my fully manual semi pro (some might say) Camera as a point and shoot, but a point and shoot that I had complete control over the metering etc and firing away. I didn't do any chimping. Just shot and moved on.

I managed to hit focus about 98% of the time I have found when I examined the images at home. It was great.

And the important bit...I was feeling complete overwhelm with stress a couple of days ago. I couldn't be arsed doing anything.

I knew that was totally not me.

Getting out to shoot in this way, no stress shooting basically, allowed me to just completely immerse myself and be present in my environment and just to shoot for the sheer pleasure of it.

So my gratitude goes out to Sean Tucker for writing what is a truly amazing piece of work and to photography for saving me from complete burn out.

So this last image was taken yesterday by my amazing wife who managed to catch a rare image of me with a genuine smile.

(Love you babes 😁x)

So that's it guys. Comment, like, share follow and hit me up for any observations, any questions and feel free to share your stories in the comments if you've had a similar experience to the one I describe here.

See all in a bit.

Kind regards.

Neil.

[yurtletheturtlehenderson]

Unbelievable || Dustin H. x Fem!Reader

Requested: @im-eating-rn Hi!hello!May I request? A little Dustin x reader where nobody of Dustin's friends believe that he got a girlfriend who goes to a different school but he actually does? they always meet in the arcade? And then maybe Dustin finally set up a meet up with his friends and his little gf at a party? And everybody is start asking since when and how? And Dustin's mother (bless her sweet soul I love her) is just like "oh yeah they are together since idk... hi y/n sweetheart!" I just love them.

A//N: this prompt is absolutely freaking adorable and I love it but I apologize in advance if any of the interactions between reader and Dustin seem forced. I'm so used to writing the reader as Dustin's sibling so this was tricky to write😂

"Come on, Dustin! I bet they're just teasing you. They're your friends, I'm sure they believe you," You rubbed your boyfriend's back soothingly, trying to comfort him.

"You'd think so," he sighed, putting his head in his hands. "But I know those assholes and I can tell when they're teasing and this is not it."

You continued tracing circles in his back, falling silent but still offering your support.

He took his head out of his hands and smiled, looking at you.

"Then again, I can't say I blame them."

"What do you mean, hun?" You asked, brow furrowed.

"You are pretty unbelievable"

You blushed furiously and you felt your chest grow warm.

"Oh, Dustin." You smiled brightly and leaned in giving him a tender kiss.

The two of you pulled away, and you intertwined your fingers with his and rested your head on his shoulder.

"So why don't we set something up?" You said simply. "A little get together at your house. You can invite your friends over. And I can swing by and meet them. Besides some homework I gotta get done, I'm free Friday. What do you say?"

He looked at you adoringly, as usual, and smiled.

"That sounds perfect. Have I ever told you how awesome you are?"

Your face scrunched up in a playful manner, you peered up at him. "Not today, you haven't."

Your head moved with his shoulders as he chuckled. "You are unbelievably awesome."

You could hear the smirk in his voice, and you smiled as your eyes focused on a random spot on the wall.

"I can't wait for you to meet them" he said contently. "And for you to wipe those smug smiles off their faces."

You giggled picturing the sight. You couldn't wait either.

+++

"No offence Dustin, but do you want to head to the arcade or something?" Will asked timidly. "There's not exactly a lot to do here,"

Dustin, whose eyes kept flickering to the door, something his friends picked up on, brushed off the comment.

"Uh yeah, maybe later though" his voice sounded distant, he was distracted.

"Dude, what is up with you?" Lucas asked.

"Oh, it's nothing," Dustin mumbled.

He shook his head briefly, taking his eyes off the front door and stood up. "I'm gonna get something to drink, does anyone want anything? I've got cola,"

"I'm good," Mike shrugged.

"Same here," Lucas said.

"I'll have a cola," Will said.

Dustin nodded and retreated to the kitchen, leaving the three boys who looked at one another.

"Something's not right, man." Lucas whispered.

"Yeah something's definitely up," Will said.

The boys fell silent when they heard footsteps approaching and sure enough Dustin emerged holding two cans of cola. He handed the can to Will who mumbled a thanks.

Dustin made his way to the couch and just before he could sit, the doorbell rang. He jumped up quickly and scrambled to the door, his friends sharing weary looks.

"I think you guys will find my guest very interesting." He said smugly, over his shoulder.

He grasped the doorknob and swung the door open, Dustin spoke confidently. "Hello, my lo-"

In front of him stood a very confused mailman holding a package.

Lucas and Mike stifled their laughter and Will was having difficulties keeping the amused grin off his face. He hid behind his drink and took a sip.

"Um, package for Mrs. Henderson?"

"Great, thanks, okay bye." Dustin took the package swiftly and reached for the door to close it but the man spoke up.

"Sir, you have to sign for it."

Letting out a weak chuckle, Dustin quickly grabbed the clipboard and scribbled his signature with the attached pen on a chain, and shoved the clipboard back into the man's hands and hurriedly shut the door.

Sighing, he leaned against the door, thankful that the exchange was over with. But when he saw the peculiar look on his friends faces he knew what was coming.

"Just save it alright?" He grumbled.

He trudged back to the couch and landed on the cushions and let himself sink into the pillows.

"You were saying?" Lucas quipped, quirking an eyebrow and smirking.

"Shut it, Sinclair."

Lucas chuckled and Mike got up and took a seat next Dustin on the couch.

"You wanna tell us what all that was all about?" He asked, a hint of amusement in his voice.

Before he could answer, a brief series of rhythmic and gentle knocks came from the front door.

Dustin, who recognized your pattern of knocks - something he picked up on somewhere along the way - and he knew this was Y/n.

Plastering on a smug smile, he looked to Mike.

"Why don't you find out yourself?"

Mike frowned, and looked over his shoulder to the door, briefly making eye contact with Will and Lucas before looking back to Dustin.

"Please, be my guest." He urged.

Dustin gestured to the front door and Mike stood, making his way over to answer it.

Mike had no idea what to expect, but when he opened the door he was still surprised to see a girl their age, standing on the front porch. You looked as if you were just as confused to see Mike as he was to see you.

You recognized him almost immediately from the pictures you had seen. It was just odd having someone else answer the door that wasn't Dustin.

He always answered the door when he was expecting you. Even the times where you could hear Mrs. Henderson call out to you that she would get it, it would usually be followed by a muffled thud and a slew of curses as Dustin scrambled to get there first.

You smiled politely. You recognized Mike from the pictures around Dustin's house and you figured they had been giving him crap or something and that's why Mike answered the door.

"Hi, you're Mike right? I'm Y/n," you stuck our your hand out for him to shake and in his confused daze he shook your hand as if he was on autopilot. "Where's Dustin?"

"Over here, Y/n/n." Dustin called wistfully.

You smiled, and rather than wait for Mike to let you in - it didn't look like the thought ever occurred to him - you stepped passed him, knowing you were invited anyway.

You stepped into the front room and you noted the delayed sound of Mike closing the door behind you and he wandered past you and back to his seat.

You looked at each of the boys, Will and Lucas gaping at you as well.

"Hi there," You met Will's eye and smiled. "You must be Will and that would make you Lucas?"

They each nodded respectively and Dustin got up, joining your side. He gently put his arm around you, a gesture you welcomed.

"Gentlemen, this is Y/n," He wore a beaming smile, looking at you fondly before looking back to his friends. "My girlfriend"

"Wait, seriously?" Lucas asked, dumbfounded.

Your smile grew brighter, albeit a bit smug, and you nodded proudly. "It's true. We've been together for some time now."

"So," Will spoke up. "You're the Y/n?"

"The one and only. And it's my understanding that you guys have been a bit "skeptical", you made air quotes as you said this, but out of politeness you kept them hidden at your sides. "about me and Dustin?"

Lucas opened his mouth to speak but the words seemed to have died on his tongue.

The guys did believe you existed of course. You and Dustin had met at the arcade, fighting over who got to play dig dug first. You had both gotten to the machine at the same time, but fought over it.

Dustin didn't argue that much, and gave the machine up to you. Not that he thought you couldn't win on your own or anything, but because he was more than fine waiting his turn for it if it meant having a reason to spend more time with you. A fact he had kept to himself. You two ended up taking turns on the game, each of you trying to beat each other's scores. Dustin had caught his friends up the next day at school, inadvertently gushing about the awesome girl he met at the arcade the previous day.

This adoration for you continued for weeks, the guys quickly lost interest and got fairly annoyed. He would find a way to bring you up in any conversation. "Y/n said the funniest thing today," and "I wish Y/n was here, she'd know just what to do," or "It's funny you say that, Y/n was just telling me about..." Eventually, one of them snapped one day, making some comment about he needed to get over her and Dustin retorted that as a matter of fact, he asked you out for a lunch date and you said yes.

A mixture of bad timing and irritation from the guys' side is what caused their disbelief. That and how highly he spoke of you. Surely no one was that perfect.

Any time he mentioned you from then on, something you did or said, anything involving you his girlfriend, they just assumed he didn't want to be caught in an embarrassing lie and kept up the act. For the sake of his dignity.

Yet they still couldn't quite shake the doubt that had taken root in their minds. Small parts in the back of their brian fed them alternate scenarios, any suggestion that could possible make sense all because if they admitted they were wrong they knew they had been bad friends.

Maybe you were just doing Dustin a favor by coming here and saying these things. Hell, maybe you found out he liked you and you didn't recproacte the feeling and as an act of pity, you agreed to lying for him just to shut them up. It was a definite stretch, but it was possible right?

No matter the doubt, however crazy the scenario, it didn't do anything to help the guilt that settled heavily on their concious. But in the whirlwind of it all, their attention was pulled to the front door for the third time that day to see Mrs. Henderson walk through the door, coat on, groceries and her keys in her hands.

She smiled brightly and greeted the boys, who politely greeted her back and when she saw you her lips stretched into a big grin.

"Y/n, honey! What a lovely surprise!" She set down the grocery bag and walked over to you.

She enveloped you with her signature mama bear hug and you gladly accepted the familiar embrace.

Pulling back, she inspected you, plucking a few cat hairs from your shoulder that had attached themselves to you during her hug. You were not fazed by this, you had gotten quite familiar with her motherly behavior. She went nuts for you when you met her and everytime you were around she doted on you more than she did Dustin if at at possible.

"Oh, how have you been sweetheart?"

You smiled warmly. "I'm great thank you. How are you?"

She gushed. "Oh I'm just fine, thank you sweetie. So tell me, what are you kids up to? Dusty, have you offered your friends a drink yet?"

"Yes mom," he said, a hint of impatience in his tone. "I was just introducing them to Y/n,"

Dustin made firm eye contact with each of his friends, reveling in the fact that they were finally listening.

"In fact, we were just clearing up some questions they had." He smiled smugly at his friends and they struggled maintaining eye contact.

"Oh, I remember when Dusty here was so excited when he first told me you guys had finally planned a first date. Gosh, he could not stop talking about you honey," Her loving gaze shifted from you to the other boys. "He was so nervous too."

"Mom!"

"It was so adorable," She giggled. "Hard to believe it's been almost a whole year now, isn't it?"

When they heard this from Mrs. Henderson, that was the final confirmation. Lucas, Mike and Will all felt immediately crushed by guilt and sent their friend many apologetic looks and apologized profusely the rest of the night.

In fact, it took them a very long time before they finally stopped apologizing. Even a scattered one here and there months after it happened.

Of course, that may or may not have had something to do with the fact that you never let them forget it.

[crypticpaw]

Cat Bath

Entrapta X Hordak fic!

Author’s note: This is an entrapdak fanfic written by me! I wrote it as feral because that’s the way I draw them so I just thought it would be fair. If you don’t understand what’s going on, just search #entrapdak on my blog and take a look at my artwork! I’m not very confident on my writing and I feel like there’s a lot of stuff I need to improve on. Tell me what you guys think! I hope this is fun!

Please, tell me how I went! I hope you all like it, and let me know if you’d like to see more! Thanks for reading!

-Why are you always so licky?! -Entrapta asked in a anoyed tone. She tried to suppress a low growl, still writhing underneath Hordak's paws, caught on another one of his "grooming" sessions. Which normally meant sitting her down and licking her entire body, leaving her a pouting and blushing mess.

This wasn't new. Since they first started to allowed themselves to show physical affection, Hordak was outraged at the fact that dogs don't groom themselves, and made it so every now and then that Entrapta should be groomed. Even if he had to chase her and grab her by the scruff to do so.

-Stop writhing! - he said, still with his tongue at her ear. -We would have been done by now if you didn't struggle!

Entrapta let out a whine of protest as he left her right ear to lick her belly. She felt her cheeks warm up and pushed his head with her hind leg. He growled loudly, it didn't faze her not in the slightest.

-Entrapta, we've been over this! I groom you so your fur won't tangle and the already dead fur won't stick to your body! It's healthier this way!

-Then why don't I see you do it?

-Because I don't have as much fur as you. -he caught her midway out of his grasp, and flipped her on her back again. -And I don't try to fight it!

She barked and whined trying to writhe away from the cat's paws, her face redder than a tomato. It did not seem to faze Hordak, though, as he continued his work on her sides this time. Entrapta's ear fur embraced and tangled around Hordak's body, despite the protest. She knew grooming was also a sign of love and worry, based on her observations. His tail was wrapped around her ear fur and sometimes when she was silent, she could hear very low purring.

Entrapta did not want to be silent today. Hordak decided it was a good idea to stop her midway into a brilliant experiment to lick her clean and she would not go down without a fight.

-Why DO you do this, anyway? -she asked in a huff.

Hordak sighed.

-I told you. It's that so your fur won't tangle and the dead fur can leave so healthier fur can grow on it's place. -his licking grew softer. She made a mental note to get him to talk more during grooming session. -And it also keeps it smooth and clean.

Entrapta frowned.

-Smooth and clean? You're not cleaning me! If that's your objective, you're making it worse! You're just slobbering me! I thought you hated slobbering! -she protested, confused this time.

-I am not slobbering you! I do not drool! I am not a dog! -Entrapta stuck out her tongue at him at that last sentence. -And how else are you supposed to do to brush your fur if not groom it?

-That's easy. I just use a brush.

It was Hordak's turn to be confused. His ears perked up and he tilted his head at her statement.

-A brush...?

-Yeah, like one of these. -her fur left his body for a second to reach the drawer on her nightstand beside her bed. She took out a strange tool, smilar to a screw-drive but had bristles at the end of it and a lot of purple fur.

He sniffed it, still not understanding her point. It just smelled of her...

-Hordak, have you never seen a brush before? -Entrapta was surprised. He always was so worried about his appearence and makeup and everything, very picky with dresses and sometimes even insisted she get changed for some reason. -How do you even brush your fur after your baths?!

-I told you, I groom myself.

-Doesn't it taste like soap after you bathe?

They were both so confused.

-Beloved, why would I ever put soap in my fur before grooming?

-No, not grooming! -Entrapta shook her head. -I mean after an actual bath. You know... Soap and water and shampoo?

Hordak wrinkled his nose and his ears pressed against his head. Red teeth showing.

-Why would I ever groom in water? I despise it! -he hissed.

Entrapta's ears fell and her eyes widened as the realization hit her.

-Hordak... You have NEVER taken a bath?!

-Well...

She gasped loudly.

-LORD HORDAK OF DRYL, ARE TELLING ME THAT YOU'VE NEVER BATHED IN YOUR LIFE?!?

She was raised on her ears, her fur on her scruff was tingled and her teeth were showing. Her tone was loud and severe, almost comanding. Hordak was taken a back as she continued to lecture him.

-That's nasty, Hordak! Even I know better than that! -she barked. -That's irresponsible and highly anti-hygienic! Now I'M disappointed!

Entrapta's ear fur now gripped strongly around his body. His ears fell back and his tail hid between his legs.

-We need to get you to the tub asap! -she jumped out of bed and made it for the bathroom door, but Hordak dug his claws on the bed and screeched in protest when she pulled him.

-Absolutely not! -he yelled. -I am not going one meter close to water! I'd rather have my skin grow mold! I understand your worry for my well being, Entrapta, but I will do just fine grooming myself! There is no way in this world I'll get in a bath tub!

-----------------------------------------------------------------------

Hordak yelled and clawed at the edge of the tub, desperately trying to get out. Entrapta's ear fur still held an iron grip around him, pulling the more he struggled.

-THIS IS RIDICULOUS! I DEMAND YOU RELEASE ME THIS INSTANT, ENTRAPTA! -He tried to sound menacing, but his words came out as desperate more than anything. -IT'S A WASTE OF TIME AND RESOURCES! I CANNOT BELIEVE-

He was cut off by a stream of water dropped in his scalp. He screeched, yowled, clawed and paddled, but Entrapta was holding him still, watering him with the shower hose. She grabbed her shampoo, conditioner, sponge and everything else she thought would be necessary and hopped back at her shouting mess of a lab partner.

She brought him to the edge where she stood and shushed him with a kiss on the lips. Hordak's face turned red, even redder than it already was, and he turned to her in anger.

-WHY ARE WE STILL GOING THROUGH WITH THIS?!

-'Cause you're still dirty, silly! -she answered in a fake innocent tone.

Entrapta took one of her bottles and poured it's content on the water.

-What is that?

-Bubble bath mixture! It makes the water all bubbly! -she mixed the water with a strap of her fur and bubbles started to form.

-What for? -she gave him the now empty bottle and he read the label: "Extra Bubbly! For extra fun in the water and extra comfort!".

This was not comforting at all! He threw the bottle over his head and clung to the edge of the tub again, digging his claws on the marble. Entrapta took off her mask and wiggled her hips before jumping right in. She raised out of the water again and shook her head before turning to him.

-I just like it bubbly! How's the experience of your first bath so far?

-Hellish! -he hissed. -I've been striped bare out of my armor and clothes! I've almost drowned in bubbles, and I am still being held captive in this idiotic joke of a torture room!

Entrapta couldn't help but laugh. Hordak could see her tail wagging on the water, splashing bubbles around. She grabbed the soaked sponge and paddled to him.

-It's just a bath, Hordikins! It's for your own good! Not a torture session!

-I doubt that! -her laughter rang in his ears again. He eyed her strange tool as she approached him. -What is that?

-It's a sponge! For scrubbing!

-Scrubbing...?

-Yup! Like this! -she reached with the sponge and scrubbed his neck gently. He immediately started clawing and screeching once again.

Anyone out of the bathroom would swear Entrapta was probably degutting Hordak alive, but the Lord of Dryl's first experience in a bath tub was simply not going smoothly. He questioned her in her shampoo and conditioner as well. Entrapta tilted her head.

-I won't get any chemical substance on you, you big dork! It's just shampoo! It's made to wash your fur! Like this! -she poured a little on her paw and smoothed her fur with it.

Hordak watched her in awe. She seemed so calm and relaxed, he couldn't understand It. Wasn't she cold? Couldn't she smell at all? She turned back to him.

-See? It wasn't that bad! -pouring more in her paw again, she climbed on him to get to his fur on his head.

He tried backing away again, but was already cornered. He did not shout, but still growled loudly at her paws on his fur.

-I still don't get it... You seem so worried about your appearance overall, I assumed you took a lot of baths in addition to grooming! -Entrapta explained. -Why are you so scared of water?

-I am not scared! I'm... I'm bothered... -Hordak lied.

-Buy why?

He growled and took a deep breath. Hordak was terrible with his words when saying his feelings out loud. Even for Entrapta.

-My... Body temperature dropped drastically, and the soap and the shampoo... Smell! Awful!

Entrapta stopped and turned to look him in the eyes, cupping his face between her paws so their noses touched.

-I'm sorry, I didn't realize it. I can turn the temperature higher if you want?

He nodded. She left his face to adjust the tap. In a few moments the bathroom was filled with vapor and Hordak felt his muscles relax.

-Do you feel better? -she asked in a genuine concerned tone.  -The smell bothers me as well and the shampoo and soap I use are already pretty weak, so I didn't thought it would bother you... We could find one that doesn't smell so bad.

-Thank you, beloved...

She kissed his forehead and a low purr escaped out of him. She wagged her tail again when his claws drew back.

[punkscowardschampions]

Jac & Savannah

Jac: Cannot stop thinking about that one dress in that last boutique we checked out though... Jac: so lowkey mad at Isabelle for having to go home to walk her dog 🙄😩 Savannah: UGH I know! Don't get me started yet again on how her mum is literally never there to do anything for it & they don't even have a garden Savannah: I'll go back & get it for you, she can't stop me Savannah: I have less than zero reasons to hurry home Jac: Lowkey like, who do I call again? 😬 Jac: the poor thing, as if breathing wasn't issue enough without having to contend with getting overweight and her mum's vape habit Jac: You're so pure 🥺🥺 Jac: and I'm personally not over seeing you in that one shade of pink like ??? Jac: 👼🏾 walking Savannah: ^^^  the levels of cruelty make my heart hurt, honestly 😢 but I won't get to Heaven until I convince them to see the error of their ways & that is a battle I simply do not have the energy for today Savannah: you could literally wear that AWFUL dress that Isabelle was considering- thank god we talked her out of that much! 🙌🏾- & still look like an actual goddess Jac: Seriously, I don't know how they can live with themselves Jac: that would be their business, because I'm not as caring as you, or even close, but the fact it hurts you means it's mine too 😤 Jac: actually though, would have had to pretend to not know her, oh my God Jac: not to mention how short it was, as well as just hideous...like this is a SCHOOL event, girl, I... 🤦 Jac: it does mean we're scheduled to help her keep looking though Jac: which is becoming a trial, like I'm so sorry to say but wow Savannah: I likewise don't have the necessary reserves to try and teach her the difference between positive & negative attention Savannah: Can Amelia not help her look? I highly doubt her wardrobe is fully stocked with suitable school event dresses so surely she still needs to keep looking too? Jac: That's a whole conversation her mother should be having with her but also needs Jac: sad, really Jac: Poor, poor Is Jac: Meels is a committed outfit repeater, no matter the occasion Savannah: She can't wear jeans to this though Jac: 🙄 I've also tried on that subject Jac: it'll just become a whole THING Jac: us trying to sort both of them out and getting nowhere with our own looks Savannah: 😔 I'm exhausted by their indecision, it's taking the excitement out of it Savannah: I understand that they can't and don't feel themselves in just anything, but it's getting ridiculous Jac: ^^ Totally agree Jac: although us being on the same page is not anything like a surprise these days Jac: it's so unfair, really Jac: they're not even THAT bothered about the whole thing Jac: we've put effort in before this whole step even Savannah: I knew you'd understand, despite feeling like I'm the one who is being totally unfair by saying anything, the rational part of my mind which isn't on the verge of tears as a result of Is' complaints or Amelia's apathy is like no, Savannah, you're not wrong Savannah: it does matter to us & it's allowed to be viewed as important Savannah: not to mention enjoyable, god forbid Jac: You NEVER need to doubt yourself Jac: you're a complete empath, honestly, to your own detriment Jac: but that isn't your fault and people should try to give even a fraction of what you give them back Jac: so, for your wellbeing, I'm calling a time-out on this and them Jac: you've got to focus on you for once ❤ Savannah: I can't tell you how wholeheartedly I wish I was the person you think I am, Ty & I had a HUGE fight earlier & I've been plagued by self doubt ever since Jac: Oh no, okay, what was said? Savannah: He seemed to think that we had plans today, which is not a conversation I remember us having, so of course I wasn't going to cancel on you all Savannah: & that makes me the most thoughtless girlfriend he's ever had Savannah: I'm so sorry the girl you dated for like two weeks dropped everything without a second thought if you even hinted that you wanted her too because she didn't have a life Savannah: they broke up for that exact reason Jac: He's totally got the wrong day Jac: you don't double-book Jac: not dragging him, he's clearly just so busy with his own stuff too but yeah, no way Jac: he'll work it out and owe you a great apology Savannah: it was beyond upsetting, I swear I need a mental health break from everyone but you Jac: I get it Jac: no boy drama but my family are driving me INSANE right now Jac: I vote we go test 💅 colours and get a hand massage to boot Savannah: Can we? I don't want to be responsible for causing you more family drama Jac: Ugh, no, they're fine Jac: and you're more important than any of this drama, Is and Amelia's too Savannah: ^^ I don't care how hard Ty is sulking, I'm not going to leave you to cope with them on your own Savannah: you needed my help first Jac: Like, he can't put that on you Savannah: he's never spoken to me that way before & I have no idea where it came from Jac: Is he under a lot of pressure right now, on the team? Jac: or at home, school Jac: either way, the issue is not with you, and he probably knows that already Savannah: No, everything's going really well Jac: 🤔 Savannah: It's me, it has to be Jac: You've not done what he's saying you have Jac: accusing would be too strong a word but Jac: we'll work it out but I'm totally clueless right now Savannah: me too 😢 Jac: Lowkey mad at him now Savannah: I shouldn't have even said anything, I told myself that I wasn't going to Savannah: but then Isabelle & Amelia started sulking too & it brought it all back Jac: No, I want to be there for you Jac: and make you feel better Jac: which I definitely will Jac: but I just can't explain away why he's being like this 🥺😢 Jac: and I wish I could Savannah: You'll definitely make me cry, you're the best Savannah: he was acting as though I don't make time for him, which is not true, but if it were, the reason would be that nobody deserves as much of it as you Jac: making you cry doesn't sound like something the best would do Jac: you've got to have your own lives, own friends Jac: you do NOT wanna be THAT couple Savannah: if you don't want my tears because I couldn't be happier to have found the love of my life, I'll keep them in, since they are yours, it's totally fine Savannah: yes, exactly & he knows that, he has more friends than extra-curriculars & he has as many of those as I do Savannah: it doesn't make any sense Jac: I will treasure them Jac: and make sure they never, ever spill for anything less than the happiest of moments, because that is all you deserve Jac: I could talk to him...totally on the low and in the most well-intentioned way Jac: maybe it's something he doesn't want to burden you with? but he has accidentally burdened you with this doubt and worry instead Savannah: 🥰🤗 Savannah: you'd do that? Jac: Of course! Jac: You're my soul sister, so I hope Ty at least considers me a friend too at this point Jac: he's going to have to get used to having me around 😅 Savannah: if he doesn't we have a bigger problem than I thought because I love you so much Savannah: & I will run away with you if anyone ever tries to make me choose 😄 Jac: He's smart, he's not gonna do that Jac: though honestly, I could do with the break right now, would not say no Savannah: maybe we could have one, it's essentially my right as a child of a broken home to play my parents off against each other Savannah: & if my dad is foolish enough to believe he can buy back any of my love or respect after what he's done, why should I feel bad for treating him like one Savannah: I refuse to, I do need to focus on myself Jac: In terms of making-up-to-do, he's in the lead no question, or so far behind everyone else, looking at it that way Jac: I think it would be the most appropriate way to end transition year Jac: God knows if my parents would go for it 🙄 Savannah: I'll talk to them, I've never lost a debate so far & I couldn't be any more well intentioned, my heart is in the exact right place Jac: 👼🏾🥰 Jac: next year is when everything gets REAL Jac: we need the holiday we are NOT going to get until...I don't even want to think about the next time we'll be able to take a real break after this Savannah: ^^^ Savannah: whatever I have to do to make it happen & be perfect, so be it Jac: the salon is the EXACT right place to plan all this Jac: all the inane questions they ask about your holidays will actually be useful for once 🤭 Savannah: 😄 Jac: This is like, just a you and me thing, right? Savannah: of course Jac: Okay because helping Isabelle pick bikinis is the opposite of fun 😂 Savannah: oh my god, I don't even want to imagine Jac: if the dress breakdowns aren't bad enough Jac: we'd be so stressed we'd be put on the no-fly list, honestly Savannah: Amelia would probably throw my body into the sea, weighted down by rocks or Isabelle's dog, I swear she hates me Jac: How could anyone hate you? Jac: and she's friends with me, so her taste can't be THAT off Savannah: we won't mention that she's also friends with Is Savannah: any excuse to talk about how perfect you are instead Jac: I seriously think if we wouldn't, who would 😶 Jac: you'll make me 😳 Savannah: OH! The tans we'll both get Savannah: you'll be sightseeing & I'll just be staring at you in disbelief because you somehow got even more beautiful Jac: Oh please Jac: you're so stunning they'd be running to write new laws just to make it illegal how good you look Savannah: stop, nobody can see me 😳 but I still feel it Savannah: it should be illegal how you make me feel Jac: sorry, but a world where you don't know and aren't told how perfect you are is just not one I wanna live in 💁 Savannah: I don't deserve you, all I've done today is mope & wish your friends away so that I can have you all to myself Jac: We deserve each other Jac: if I didn't have you, who would I be able to get excited about this with? Jac: I'd be going on my own, most likely Savannah: okay, you're right Jac: I just get sad thinking about all the time we weren't friends and didn't know each other properly before Savannah: No, don't be sad, baby, we trust in the universe because it was meant to be now not then Savannah: lord knows I needed my glow up before I could be around you Savannah: 👼🏻✨🌞💛 Jac: That's true Jac: I'm more thankful that we have NOW and the promise of forever than I could ever be sad Jac: definitely not ignoring how blessed I am Jac: also blessed that my hair grew back in and I lost the puppy fat look 😬🤦 Savannah: I stand by what I said when I first saw the pictures Savannah: you were ADORABLE Jac: you're too sweet but I'm not gonna complain about it 🥰 Savannah: It's true & you know that because I would never jeopardise our connection Savannah: you're the only person I can talk to with total honesty, it's so important to me Jac: I only feel like myself with you Jac: no one else gets it all Savannah: I feel like a better person when I'm with you Savannah: but with none of the pressure that my parents put on me not to fail or the fear I have of letting Ty down Jac: You're the best person Jac: if all I do is give you the confidence to believe that, then that's totally worth it Savannah: You're going to achieve everything you want Jac: I can't wait to be Dr Taylor to your Dr Moore Savannah: 😊 Savannah: I'll be there to make sure every second of your life is worth it until then & of course after Jac: Naturally ❤ Jac: have you seen the groupchat? Savannah: please don't judge me for not having opened it Jac: I couldn't even when I'm just sat here like 🤨😑 Jac: Is has sent a million links and they seem to be getting worse every one I open ??? Savannah: Well I can't face that until later when I'm 🛀🏾🥂 Savannah: not that I'll be staying at Ty's unless he apologises to me Jac: You can always stay with me Savannah: I don't think any of your family would be fine about the always, but I wish I could Jac: They'll deal, I have to put up with all of them so 💁 Jac: I'm trying to persuade them to move the sofa bed from the hangout area to the music room, make it more of a spare room too, more privacy Jac: it's not fair that Jesse has a whole room with all his crap in, there's plenty of space in said hangout room for him Savannah: 😄 I'm sure we could win that debate too, I definitely have as much passion about the subject as you if it means I don't have to go home Savannah: it's impossible to 🛀🏾🥂 when my mum is mid-breakdown in her en-suite Jac: 😬😥 Jac: she needs to convert the passion she had for couples therapy for solo therapy now Savannah: Honestly! It's a full time job making sure she's adequately but not over medicated & if I'm worrying about it I know Sienna is Savannah: I have to unlock the door to let her in & before I know it I'm re-doing her braids or checking her homework, all the while my bath water is going cold Jac: You're actually such a good sister, and daughter Jac: In awe of you Jac: I wish you didn't have to work as hard as you do, but it's really admirable Savannah: like, so sorry that you had to go home to walk your dog, Isabelle 🙄 it's no wonder she doesn't understand me Jac: She doesn't even try Jac: she lives on planet Is where the most important thing is which bland boy she's going to get off with next Jac: I can't claim so many of your experiences and struggles but I respect the hell out of you, and try to make your life easier where and when I can Savannah: oh my god, the boy from the other night! I can't Jac: 🤢 Jac: her taste! Jac: worrying Jac: ugly dresses are the least of her problems Jac: I feel like I can't leave her alone sometimes, honestly Savannah: if this thing with Ty is leading to a break up I refuse to date any of the boys in our school Savannah: that would be another full time job working out which of them have & haven't done what with her & when Jac: tell me about it 🙄 Jac: they're all so lacklustre Savannah: ^^^ Savannah: we know our worth & we're simply too good for any of them unless they have a serious emotional glow up of their own Jac: Mhmm Jac: Ty is never gonna break up with you though Savannah: I don't know anymore, I never thought he would raise his voice to me Jac: That's pretty out of order Jac: he knows about your dad, what he's like Savannah: & it's really out of character too Jac: Yeah, totally Jac: men and anger issues are a whole can of worms Jac: there's something he isn't dealing with, for sure Savannah: or something he's not telling me Savannah: I just hope it's not a someone Jac: who could even come close to you? Jac: he's not that cliche of having the perfect girl and risking it on some skank Savannah: Logically I know that but I'm so scared Jac: Babe 🥺 Jac: you NEED to put you first, even just for the length of this nail appointment Jac: you don't need this extra stress from him Jac: I've started the convo, you can read it all once we get to the meat of it Savannah: I just want to be excited about 💅🏾 & all the iconic outfits we saw Savannah: it's SO unfair Jac: I hate this Jac: I wish I could take you away right now Savannah: you do, I'd be even more a wreck if you weren't the amazingly intuitive person you are, earlier without even having to be told I was upset you made me feel better over and over again Savannah: and right now you know what I need, way before I can put it into words or coherent thoughts Jac: we trust the connection too 💫💐💞 Savannah: I love you Savannah: I'm not devoting time & space to anyone else today, from this point on Jac: and we're definitely getting lunch after, my treat Savannah: no, mine Savannah: you've already been taking such good care of me Jac: Okay, but we will be going [place] and I will be getting you your favourite dessert Jac: no arguments 😘 Savannah: Okay, I won't fight you on it Jac: there are so many more important, and fun, decisions for us to make Savannah: ^^^!! Savannah: is Is still trying to force you to make outfit decisions for her though? Jac: I've said we've got more pressing matters right now Jac: I've made it sound like a me issue though, don't worry Jac: they'll have to cope without us for a while Savannah: Thank you, I can't cope with their relationship advice at the best of times Jac: Yeah, there's less than zero chance they'd have anything useful to say so Jac: they don't need to know Savannah: We won't tell them about the holiday plans either, that way you'll have a nice secret to keep as well as my stupid boyfriend drama Jac: to secrets 🥂 Savannah: 🥂 Savannah: Are you still thinking about that dress or have I ruined everything? Jac: You could never ruin anything with me Jac: so yes Jac: but I'm also remembering that other shop we didn't even get a chance to check out Savannah: their window display is INCREDIBLE ✨ Savannah: we should go Jac: I KNOW Jac: I've been window shopping every time I go past Jac: and to be fair, I think it's a bit out of Isabelle's price range, so it actually wouldn't be nice to take her there Savannah: the universe has spoken, I'm taking you there, our secret Jac: 🥰 Jac: I swear I only have fun when I'm with you Savannah: you're so much fun that nobody considers you might not be having any, but I promise I'll always think about you & what you need Jac: You'll make me cry now Savannah: Baby, no 🥺 if you start you'll set me off again Savannah: I'm a really ugly crier & you look like an 👼🏻 Jac: Okay, okay, no crying Jac: we'll stay flawless Savannah: that's harder work for me than it could ever be for you, but I'll do my best Jac: You're the most perfect person I've ever known Jac: inside and out Savannah: I feel that way about you, I'm not just saying it like, oh sure, me too Savannah: you're so perfect I should hate you Jac: Yeah, I know Jac: sorta been there done that Jac: not that I ever hated you really Savannah: I couldn't Jac: No, in the way how perfect you are SHOULD be impossible, that's how hating you felt Savannah: that's it exactly Savannah: & I just wanted you to notice me, I'd wait all day sometimes, getting more extra about everything Jac: It was like, I should've been mad at you but I could only ever be impressed Savannah: Well, I can't lie, I'm glad because I've never worked that hard for anyone before Savannah: it'd be super awkward if I failed Jac: 😅 Jac: I'm flattered Jac: how many boys wish, like Savannah: of course, but boys are easy Jac: duh, if you need to try then you've got bigger problems Savannah: I don't understand what Amelia's is, a smile & a hair flip & she could be dating anyone in our year Jac: Yeah, me either Jac: maybe she's had the same 💭 about Isabelle's seconds Savannah: 😄 Savannah: at this point I'm seriously expecting her to come out as asexual Jac: 🤔 maybe you're onto something Savannah: I do have good instincts for these things Jac: True Savannah: one of Sienna's friends is & nobody's been anything but really supportive about it Savannah: her year group are so sweet though Savannah: I was not like that a year ago Jac: Awh Jac: yeah, she knows we'd all support her Jac: and no one is going to say anything to her Jac: no one with half a brain cell anyway Savannah: & even if things were said it'd be no worse than what they say about her now Jac: Facts Jac: I don't know if she 1. genuinely doesn't hear 2. pretends not to or 3. seriously doesn't care Savannah: & you know her better than anyone so if you aren't sure she probably isn't either Jac: 😕 Jac: if she gave any indication, I'd do everything to help her Savannah: I know you would Savannah: I'm honestly so jealous of how close you two are & have been for like, ever Jac: but we're just as close now Savannah: I can't help but envy all the shared history you have though, all the pictures & stories that I'm obviously left out of Savannah: I shouldn't think like that, I know Savannah: but sometimes it does get to me, even though I try & be a better person than that Jac: We're going to make so many memories together though Jac: from now 'til forever Savannah: of course we are Savannah: it's no wonder he also accused me of being over sensitive, that one is very clearly true Jac: people just say that when they don't want to make allowances for other people's inconvenient feelings Jac: you can feel that, and I feel it too Jac: I wish you had been there Savannah: it just feels like she brings up all these past anecdotes as often as she does to try & leave me out Savannah: but maybe she doesn't realise how much it hurts me Jac: I'm sure she doesn't, but I'll make extra effort to clock it and get her to chill now Jac: we don't need to dwell on the past, especially at our age 🙄 Savannah: I don't want to cause friction, I can totally understand her wanting to reminisce, if we'd known each other then, I'd be the same Savannah: I talk & think about you literally all the time as it is Jac: Not even Jac: I don't want you feeling left out, or anyone Savannah: you would never Jac: you're so important to me Savannah: you've always let me know that Jac: 🥰 Savannah: I don't know how I would cope with anything that's going on in my life right now without you Savannah: I didn't even realise how badly I needed someone to talk to Jac: You look after everyone, you need someone to look after you Savannah: I can't rely on anyone to do that though Jac: me 🙋 Savannah: you can't leave me ever, I swear I'll go crazier than my mother Jac: I never will Jac: I promise Savannah: okay, I'm yours to look after then Jac: I can cope with that 😄 Savannah: you've definitely handled me at my worst, I haven't forgotten my bathroom breakdown, trust me Savannah: the embarrassment will last forever Jac: it so easily could have been me Jac: and maybe I wouldn't have had the courage to ever reach out if not, frame it like that Savannah: No, I hate that Jac: Okay, but no embarrassment either Jac: because you're the strongest person I know, and nothing I've learnt about you has changed that opinion Savannah: Well, I think you're the bravest & I fully believe you'll always find the courage to do whatever you want Jac: 🤞 Jac: I've got a lot of things I want and intend to do Savannah: 👏🏾 Yes girl! Savannah: I can't wait for transition year to be over Jac: Ugh, I know Jac: on the one hand, LOVE the extra opportunities and learning experiences they simply do not bother with the rest of the time Jac: but the other half is having to do lessons I have NO intention of carrying on with, which is just, pointless Savannah: ^^^^^^^^^ Savannah: my auntie was complaining at me as if it was OPTIONAL & I CHOSE it, excuse me Jac: Ha! 🙄 Jac: we all know it's meant to be in theory Jac: but if you don't go to a school with a high teacher to child ratio, with the budget and time to care about tailoring the learning experience to each child...then you're gonna have to do it with the rest, like it or lump it Savannah: She's a product of the American school system, there is zero place for her criticism Jac: and I- 😶 Jac: even our worst school would be preferable I'm sorry 😂 Savannah: Right?! Jac: Compared to the English and American systems, except maybe the super-elite English ones, I feel like we're still going to be at an advantage when we go to Uni Savannah: Agreed Savannah: even this year we've totally made the most of so far Jac: You've got to Jac: or you'll end up with a mediocre life and what is the point in even living Savannah: Ugh, exactly Savannah: I can already tell who is going to end up living like that Jac: I know right Jac: like, sorry to break it to you, but they're called FORMATIVE years for a reason Savannah: mhmmmm Jac: you can still have fun without ruining your life and future Jac: you just have to work hard too and some people are simply too lazy 💁 Savannah: ^^ we manage to have it all Savannah: I'm not sorry if they don't want it enough to secure it for themselves Jac: Exactly Jac: can't be sorry for you if you chose to act that way Jac: maybe some of them will turn it around years down the line but it'll be so much harder than if they'd put the work in when they were meant to Savannah: It breaks my heart that everybody doesn't have you to guide & hype them Jac: Only you deserve me though, that's the truth of it Savannah: I'm willing to work at that for the rest of my life too so Jac: 🥺 Jac: Ugh, I just love you Jac: you've really solidified all my life choices, if that makes sense Jac: like I know now everything I want is exactly what I need too Savannah: It makes perfect sense & I feel it too Jac: Thank God you do Savannah: My family are always pushing me to go to Trinity, they don't understand at all Jac: like, yeah, it's a good Uni, but we've done Dublin Jac: it's also the point of Uni to expand your horizons, put roots down somewhere else Jac: your hometown and Uni town are NOT meant to be the same Savannah: ^^ thank you Savannah: Sienna is the only one whose opinion is valid because I will be leaving her here alone for a year before she can go wherever she decides to & she'll actually miss me Savannah: my parents just want to control me Jac: Right, you aren't being selfish about it Jac: it's because you're too useful to them, like you said, looking after Sienna and your mum Jac: but those are actually both jobs your dad took on when he got married and made a family so Jac: he still has to deal with them Savannah: He gets to literally walk out but god forbid I take the next step in my life Jac: Right, he has to realize you are not a surrogate carer Jac: and that sorting those things out will always be his responsibility Savannah: He takes no responsibility for abandoning us never mind the fact that he spent years emotionally destroying my mum & then walking out when he didn't like who she became Jac: He's going to have to face his blame one day Jac: if nothing else, he does love you and Sienna, he wouldn't let anything really bad happen to you two Savannah: I don't feel loved, I feel like he decided none of us were good enough Savannah: maybe I'm too much like her for him to handle too Jac: I hate that he's made you feel like that Jac: but if anything, that shows failure on his part, not yours Jac: you're brilliant and loving and you're still there, even though it's so much for you to handle Jac: you don't need him, but that doesn't mean he shouldn't be held accountable right now, and that it's shit that he isn't stepping up Savannah: I hate him & I can't stand that he's made me carry hate in my heart when that isn't who I want to be Jac: Oh, Sav Jac: you wouldn't hold negative feelings towards him if he wasn't giving you that energy first Jac: you're never a doormat, again, it shows you're strong Savannah: Don't let me be with Ty, okay? Jac: Promise Savannah: Throw my phone into the 🛀🏾 if you have to, I'll forgive you Jac: 😅 I've got it in writing Savannah: 😄 Jac: would never drop it in 🥂 Jac: such a waste Savannah: Lord no, I need the full 🍾 Jac: 🙌 I can get behind that Jac: it's been a DAY Savannah: it had it's genuine 🙌🏾 moments nevertheless, because of & featuring you Savannah: I've looked at the pictures so many times, I CANNOT believe you really look like that Jac: 😳 says you Savannah: yes & I'm going to keep saying it until it sinks in for both of us that you're the most beautiful person that has ever existed because I'm hoping that if it does for me, at least, whatever dress you choose won't take my breath away as soon as I see you in it Savannah: otherwise you'll be trying to twirl but also having to catch me as I legitimately faint Jac: you'll have to not kill me before then or I won't be any use to anyone Jac: just a blushy mess on the floor Savannah: that isn't fair, on the one hand, you can't die, I need you, but on the other that sounds ADORABLE Jac: it's unfair how much of an 👼🏾 you are to me but I don't wanna share so Savannah: pink is one of my favourite colours, you know this & you wear it so well 🌺😳🌷 Jac: I'll wear it for you Jac: even if I don't go for that dress Jac: I wonder if we can get corsages or is that too extra 🤔 Savannah: I'll get that dress if it makes you happy, I'll wear anything you want me to, including a corsage Savannah: there is no such thing as too extra when you're talking about 🌷 🌹 🌺 🌸 🌼 🌻 Jac: my sentiments exactly 😄😄 Jac: I don't think Amelia will wear one Jac: but we can get them Jac: we can get our birth flowers and favourites and it'll be so cute Savannah: It should be an us thing, the holiday is so far away Jac: ^^ and it's more our vibe Jac: doesn't go with a short dress or jeans, really Savannah: 😄 Jac: I've got some books I need to return to the library, do you wanna meet at that little coffee place by there? Savannah: how many books? If you need help carrying them all I'll meet you at the library Jac: love the romcom fantasy 😅 Jac: you know me, there's a few... 😬 Savannah: 😊 I'll be right there, baby Savannah: no more struggles today Jac: ❤❤✨ Savannah: 🥰

[chaoticgoodlawyerwrites]

Lovely! Good to know that those words were as devastating to read as they were to write. I'm feeling worse today, so my comments will definitely be briefer. @annaisu (have edited since this morning)

I guess this is a good time as any to dive a bit deeper into how I write Bingqiu here. Both SY and LBH were impacted differently but deeply by the time travel experience. I'll take them one at at time.

SY, in addition to the added responsibility, was given a glimpse at a future he never would have imagined for himself, let alone let himself want. He was focused on survival and survival alone; he didn't really have any concrete plans for living. But now he knows he can (he has that luxury SV!SY didn't), now he wants something and he's afraid on some level of wanting a future. Because that opens himself up to disappointment and vulnerability. It ties back to why he admitted he wanted to be with LBH as an adult but never let himself believe it would actually happen until LBH walked him step by step through why he loves him. Without that insight but full of discomfort over Binghe's current age, he couldn't let himself hope for the future, leaving everything up to Binghe's discretion.

LBH, conversely, is reassured of his future here. This chapter starts to show how he's forcing himself to mature faster than he had in SV. He sees how SY needs him, so he happily becomes what he needs. The future he saw was a surprise to him, but not to the extent that it was to SY. It showed he had achieved his impossible dream of marrying him while able to fully be himself as demonic emperor. He saw the end of their story, very much would like to skip to it, but knows SY isn't willing to do that. So, to the extent possible, he grows up for him voluntarily, and is rewarded for it by SY allowing him to essentially act has his husband. But he still has a lot to learn, so how he matures (the process only starts to show in this chapter) is dependent on later events, particularly as he observes how SY reacts to others. It's a lot of responsibility for him to take on so young, but he willingly does so. In a lot of ways, he ends up more emotionally mature than SY.

I also wanted this chapter to begin to show Binghe's cleverness. As someone commented on early on, he's out here playing chess for SY's hand while everyone else is playing checkers (and YQY is actively flipping the board but shhhh for now). He's brilliant, learning to use strategy to get himself closer to SY but also when to call upon allies. Bingmei was a white lotus until SQQ pushed him into the abyss. I highly doubt Bingge was, despite what SY said. I've kinda started referring to this version of LBH as Bingdi; closer in bearing to how Bingge presents himself but as devoted to SY as Bingmei is, while being more stable than both (at least for this sequel).

Ah, I've run out of steam. Hopefully that makes sense?

Edit: Okay I've rested and wanted to revisit this to actually point something out/answer at least one question you raised.

1. It's LBH's scent that soothes him.

2. SY thought that people would look at MQF's notes and then confuse, deliberately or not, which Binghe he was talking about. Basically that he was unsafe for LBH to be around. But more relevant to something LBH could plausibly believe, SY feared that any details that emerged would convince LBH that SY preferred Bingmei to him, that he wished he was another version of himself.

3. What actually was in MQF's notes is kinda immaterial to the story, but they managed to convince at the very least YQY that the other universe wasn't a fluke. SQQ happily (eagerly even) slept with Bingmei and indicated deep feelings for Binghe, even though they weren't sexual in nature. What set YQY off was more the notes from his interview with Binghe, which were included in the file.

Okay I'm done for real this time.

Don’t You Know (That I’m Yours) - Read and React Ch 2

Don’t You Know That I’m Yours By chaoticgoodlawyer @chaoticgoodlawyerwrites Read and React - Chapter 2 Chapter 1 << Here >>

He had done his best to ignore the stares and whispers from his fellow Peak Lords that kept turning to him despite the packed if tedious agenda for the day’s meeting. Then again, their attention may have repeatedly strayed back to him precisely because the meeting was so dull that they felt the need for a distraction and not everyone was as blessed as he to be able to secretly message a friend. It certainly didn’t help that the most interesting and scandalous part of the day happened first thing in the morning, giving people all day to ruminate on the revelations surrounding Shen Qingqiu.

😁 😁 Poor Shen Yuan… I bet that meeting was awful - but don’t worry! I’m sure that’s the worst Peak meeting you’ll ever go to! Right? XD

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