#i havent written in a while because i havent been feeling.. the need to do it? but suddenly i feel like i could write a book
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cheruib · 5 months ago
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early july morning
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dallonwrites · 1 year ago
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forcing myself to write today not that i don't want to write but i can feel that my apathy towards writing certain projects is because i haven't written for them in a while and feel disconnected now. realising that this is sometimes the cause of why i "don't want" to write was life changing btw
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mochamadeleines · 1 month ago
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Sweethearts and Sweet Dreams <3
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“Nothin’?”
“Mhm.”
“Whats behind your back then?”
You sway in place, trying to suppress a knowing smile. “I dont have anything behind my back.” (6.4k words)
tags!! - 18+ modern au! Husband! Joel Miller, Wife! Reader, you guys are happy and in love!, mutual obsession if u squint, lots of exposition im so freaking sorry, pervert Joel if u squint, praise kink joel if you squint, dumbification if you squint, written for those with daddy issues lowkeeyyyyy, written with game joel in mind but could be hbo joel no problem!, lowk i combined the two in my mind, mentions of shy old man joel, housewife! reader (by choice), unspecified age gap but reader is like. thirty? and joels Like...55??, talk about joel taking medication for his anxiety, p in v sex, dirty talk, public sex, outdoor sex, joel has a kink for dresses because i said so? service top joel if you squint, pet names, a pinch of jealousy and possessiveness for fun, playful banter, mentions of maria and tommy and their baby with a made up name Lol, mentions of ellie and sarah (rip), mentions of readers past abusive relationships, talk about joel struggling with substance abuse/addiction and being hospitalized.....Im sure u can theorize why </3, lots of lore ill get into in another fic MAYBE *smirks*, flip flop in perspective, sometimes showing what joel is thinking or what reader is thinking blah blah
authors notes!! - hi there!!! im mocha and this is my first joel fic ever + my first fic posted to tumblr!! im really nervous cuz i havent written anything in months and ive never written joel before so please let me know if you like it!! id love to write more of this au for u guys if theres a demand for it...Thank u for reading!! also barely proof read im ngl. ive been staring at this fic all day im sick of itttt. p.s i dont usually write smut i also kinda do idfk Is this bad or am i tweaking
You step out of the house, morning sun soaking into the roots of your hair and the driveway beneath your feet. Theres a package youve been waiting for. 
You cant contain your grin as you wiggle it out of the hot prison that is your mailbox.
“What the hell are you doin’ out there barefoot?” Joel chastises you from the front door, leaning his elbow on the frame. Joel, your lovely husband of two years. Been together for five. And because of how hard he works, you have the privilege of being a stay at home wife. Some people think that sort of life is stifling, but youve never felt so free. No more jobs you hate, no more financial struggles. Just you, Joel, and your cat, Cement. He likes to pretend it isnt a totally hilarious name for a pet.
You were his first relationship in almost a decade, so it was a lot of work helping him unpack his anxieties about dating, and a lot of work for you to feel safe and unafraid. Honestly? Youve been mistreated by enough men to land you in the psychward.
But Joel never yells at you, he never breaks things when hes angry or threatens to hurt you. He might raise his voice every now and again, but its never because of something you did. Sometimes the stress of life is just too much. 
He works hard, he loves his daughter- daughters- and he would do anything to keep you happy. Whatever you say goes, he says. Even now, you hardly argue. Of course you have disagreements, or off days thatd lead to one of you being especially moody, but the both of you do your best to communicate.
Behind that rough exterior, is someone who just wants to be needed. 
You first met Joel at a youth center you volunteered at, he taught guitar, you taught arts and crafts. Joel says it was your smile and sense of humor that charmed him. It was his singing and southern accent for you.
Your favorite thing about Joel is how soft he gets around you. He says its because you make it easy to be soft. 
Joel was a shy lover at first. He would get nervous just kissing you, or holding your hand. While most people become intimate very early on in their relationship, you and Joel didnt do anything sexual for the first five months of you dated. Sure, you almost did, plenty of times, but he would get so overwhelmed and cut things short. You broke two of your vibrators during this era of your relationship. Embarassing.
You remember your first time very vividly. Joel had worked back to back doubles trying to meet a deadline, and on the final day, after having barely spoken to you for almost a week, you had shown up to his house, unannounced. You were wringing water out of your jacket when he swung the door open. 
“How-” Joel blinks a few times, stepping forward to examine the rainfall. “How long you been out here?”
“Not that long,” You lie and pick up the container you brought off the porch chair. Part of you had a hard time mustering up the courage to even knock on the door. Droplets of water cascade down your chin. “Hi, sorry. I know youre tired.”
He shakes his head, voice soft and warm. “S’fine. Now c’mon, youre gonna get sick.”
Youre seated at the little dining table next to the kitchen now, trying to let the sound of the rainfall ease your nerves.
Joel was quick to grab you a towel, and does the honors of drying your face and hair with it. “Why didnt you jus’ call me? Woulda gotten out of the shower faster if i knew you were gettin’ soaked out there like this.”
“I dunno, sorry.”
“An’ whatd i tell you about apologizin’ all the time?”
“Sor- Uh. Right. Okay.” You tighten your jaw. No more.
Joel moves behind you, now squeezing water out the ends of your hair. “Whas’ that?”
“Oh!-” You peel back the lid, showing it to him. “Old fashion cake donuts are your favorite right? I remember you saying you liked eating them with your coffee in the mornings so…I made these. Youve been working a lot lately and I wanted to do something nice for you.”
Joel gingerly grasps the container from your hands, looking into it. Theyre a warm golden brown, outside evenly fried, and the sweet scent of them hits his nose right away.
“I was just gonna leave them on the doorstep and call you to tell you they were there, but I wanted to see you.”
His adam's apple bobs as he swallows the dryness in his throat. Youre too good for him. 
“Thank you very much.” He presses a kiss to your damp hair. “Now, lets get you into some dry clothes.”
Joel gives you a t-shirt and a pair of his boxers to keep you modest while your clothes wash and dry. 
You wait patiently on his bed for the hot chocolate he promised you before you showered. Theres nothing to watch on the tv, so you just turn it off and reach for the lamp on his nightstand instead. 
He comes in quietly, and sets the mug down beside the lamp. You finally come into focus, clear as day even under the low lighting.
“You uh.. You look nice.”
You blink. “I look nice?”
“In my shirt.”
That gets a smile out of you. 
Joel tips his head towards the mug. “S’hot so, give it a few minutes. Dont want you burnin’ your mouth.”
You nod. “Okay.”
Hes sat beside you now and the two of you sit in silence for a while. Its not awkward, just the kind of silence where both of you want to say something but just.. Cant.
Joel unravels first. “Missed you, y’know. Just been tired.”
“I know.” Your voice wobbles, and Joels jaw tightens like hearing you sound so sad stings him. “I missed you, too.” 
He slides his hand over yours, giving it a squeeze. Its okay. 
“Hey Joel...Can I stay the night?” 
“Sure. Id really like that.”
While you drink your hot chocolate, you and Joel catch up. You both talk about work, and about your new found interest in baking. Joel teases you about your lack of cooking skills, you do the same. Youre both useless. 
When its time to climb into bed, neither of you can actually fall asleep. Joel rolls onto his side, away from you and the window. You follow, curling up like a little cat against his back. The sensation is nice for the both of you.
You speak up after a little while.
“Joel?”
“Mm.”
“Thank you for letting me stay.”
He scoffs, voice thick with exhaustion. “Like I'd force you to leave after you brought me such a nice present.”
You let out a little giggle, “So if i didnt, youd kick me out?”
“Id think ‘bout it.”
You gasp, gently shoving at his back. “Thats mean…!”
“S’really not.”
“Oh yeah? And what if I poisoned them?.”
“Then itd jus' be a regular day of your cookin’ then.” Joel reminds you, lighthearted. Too many times where you left the shells in your eggs or burnt toast or left the bacon on the pan for too long.
“You cant get mad at me for my dark past when you made a perfectly good sirloin taste like horse leather.”
“Ugh. Dont remind me. That was like putting a one-hundred dollar bill into a paper shredder. How do either of us stay alive again?”
“Uh. Digiorno?”
“Digiorno.”
After a few moments, Joels rolling over again, and hes guiding your head to settle against his chest. Your arms wrap around him, and his arms around you. 
“Joel,” You whisper. He hums. “Im cold.”
“S’cause youre not wearin’ any pants.”
“And whos fault is that?”
“Still yours.”
“I was left out in the rain like a sad, sopping wet cat. One that was left in a box all alone with no family…” You pretend to sniffle. “Dont you feel bad for me?”
Joel sighs, not saying anything more except making sure the part of the comforter behind your back is tucked into your side so the cold air doesnt get in. When hes done, you do a little shimmy up his body, and throw your leg over his hip. Oh no.
Hes alert now. Very alert. Be normal. Joel hesitates, licking the dryness off his lips. “Uh. Feel better?”
“Mhm.” You push your face into his throat, cat-like, before settling down again. Hes like a radiator.
Actually scratch that, he cant be normal. 
“Darlin’.” He rasps, patting your back to get your attention.
“Mm?”
“Your leg. Move it.”
A few beats pass. “Why?”
“Because…” Wow,  he didnt think hed get this far. You shift forward and Joel lets out a quiet exhale through his nose, one that couldve been masked by the rain if you werent so close.
“Are you-”
“No! No. Its- Its not what you think-” He cant see your face in the darkness but he knows you feel the semi-hard struggling through the confines of his pants. Lame.
“Joel,” You say, soft. Your hands slide up his arm to cradle his jaw. Lightning flashes into the room, giving you a glimpse of Joels tight expression. He whispers your name back, just as soft.
“This is normal.” 
Its normal, it is! Except for the fact that you guys havent had sex yet. The stress of being intimate is too much, kills his boner in a blink. The longer he waits the worse the anxiety gets.
“I-I know.”
You place a hand on his chest, feeling it pound away like crazy through all the soft muscle.  
“Youve been taking your medication, right?”
Has he?
The silence of him thinking is proof enough. “Joel-”
He sighs, rubbing his eyes through the darkness .“I know, I know. Shoot, Im sorry. I just forget sometimes.”
“Its okay.” The pad of your thumb strokes the tops of his cheek, and you press a tender kiss to his mouth to soothe him.  “...Want me to remind you?”
The softness of your lips has him a bit dazed. “Huh?”
“I said, do you want me to remind you? I can- You know, call you before you leave work. Make sure you take them.”
“You know I wake up at five-o-clock in the mornin’ , right?”
“I know.” 
In a whisper, “Okay.”
Joels rough palms trail down your back and stop at the curve of your butt, finger tips delicately tracing the skin above your shorts. You shiver.
Barely above a whisper. “We dont have to go all the way.”
He says your name again, laced with worry. He doesnt want you to feel pressured. 
You pull your leg off his hip and push yourself up, settling your hands on either side of Joels head.
“Can I tell you something?”
“Yes-”
“-And you cant get all in your head about it. You stay here, with me. You stay present.”
“Okay, okay.” He nods, a bit defeated. “I will stay present.”
“When you...When you say you dont wanna have sex, what is it that youre thinking exactly? I know you said you just get really nervous but I feel like youre not being totally honest.”
Joel stays quiet, idly rubbing your sides. Maybe you are a cat. Just getting to feel any part of you is soothing. “I jus’ want you to feel good. ‘Fraid ill do somethin’ you dont like.”
“You cant assume how I feel, Joel. Being intimate.. It takes time to learn what the other person likes.”
He sighs. “I know.” Youre always right.
Adding on, “Like I said, we dont have to go all the way,” You lean further back, situating yourself on his hips. He lets out a shaky breath when he feels the pressure of your ass through his sweats.
“But, I want to start somewhere. I want to feel you.” 
“Fuck- Um-” Hes shaking now, letting you grind your hips down onto him. Joel cant seem to control the way his hips instinctively push up to meet yours. Youre both becoming of a mess of little gasps and hot breaths and tiny whimpers already.
You hunch forward, guiding his hand under your your shirt- His shirt- letting him feel up the supple skin of your stomach, then the area where your ribs are, then your-
“And I want you to feel me,”
Surprisingly, you did actually go all the way that night.
Your sex life was a bit of a rocky start, but after Joel got over most of his anxiety, you learned quickly just how goddamn insatiable he was. Five years in and he still regularly makes you sore. 
There are a couple things you learned about him and his sexual interests. He loves to take you in his truck, in your kitchen, in your bathroom, on your couch. Other, riskier places. Anywhere that isnt your bed apparently, not that he isnt fucking you there either.
Joel is handsy, so handsy infact it embarasses you to no end, especially when youre infront of others. Thats usually how it starts, too. First he kisses you, then gropes your hips and your ass, and the next thing you know, youre cumming on his fingers. Then hed bend you over, or get you on your back, or make you ride him. Is it really riding if hes just slamming up into you until your brain turns into mush?
He likes that too. Making you not think.
Youd be lying if you said its only ever him. Sleepy morning handjobs before work, whining to him over the phone and touching yourself to his voice, arching your back into him while you're washing dishes, sucking him off after hours in his office.
And while most men prefer lingerie or little costumes, Joel likes dresses. Dresses that are discreet so he can take you in the backyard when he comes home early and sees you gardening. Or when youre both at a friends house and hes had a little too much to drink and finds himself alone with you. Dresses that make it easy to play his favorite game with you. I touch you, and you make sure we dont get caught by being too loud. Joel really is the worst sometimes.
Now, you only ever wear pants when its cold, or to bed or sometimes when youre lounging, like today. Youre in some shorts and a tank top. Otherwise, its dresses all year round, usually retro styles or ones meant for spring. Joels not picky though, he loves any dress on you.
Even if you wear an extremely modest, white lacey sleep dress, looking like some kind of vintage ghost, the man would still keep you up all night. And he has. He said you looked like a princess. You guess you kind of did.
The entire thing is like an unspoken arrangement between you both. He doesnt tell you to wear them, you just do.
And he works hard to spoil you, so why not buy as many cute dresses as possible? 
You got a cute dress today too, on the same day Joel has off. You think its going to be a new favorite of his.
The big polymailer stays hidden behind your back. Be casual. “Uh- Nothing!”
“Nothin’?”
“Mhm.”
“Whats behind your back then?”
You sway in place, trying to suppress a knowing smile. “I dont have anything behind my back.”
“Lemme see then. Show me your hands-”
“Hey, Mrs. Miller!”
Both you and Joel turn your heads to the voice, and only one of you has the energy to fake a a smile. Your neighbor is stopping in his driveway, having come back from a jog it looks.
“Hi, Lee.” 
Joel really, really, really doesnt like Lee. You dont like him either, but youre not one to cause problems. Lee on the other hand, is. Hes a bit younger than you, and a lot younger than Joel. Hes one of those tech dudes with a massive ego, thinks that youll be swayed by his money and his “charm” and youth as if youre some sad housewife in need of saving. Gross. 
And another thing, Lee doesnt even actually live here! Hes here ever so often to visit his dad between, you dont know, tech expos? You forget. Joel believes he started showing up more often to see you. 
Youre walking towards the porch again. Joels looking especially unhappy to see him today, knuckles pulled taut into a fist. His lips stay pressed into a thin line, careful not to let anything slip out. He usually lets you do most of the talking, as much as it pains him. 
Joels really not a fan of the way Lees eyes take a trip up your bare legs. Little shit.
“Out with no shoes again, Mrs. Miller?”
“You know me, Im uh- Im weird.”
“The weird ones do it best.” He smiles, all teeth. It gives you the creeps. His attention is on Joel now. Its like watching a puppy try to one up a wolf. “Right, Joel?”
“Uh huh.” Whatever that means.
“Actually, I've been meaning to ask you something, Mrs. Miller.” Lee crosses into your driveway and you glance briefly at Joel, as if to make sure he isnt going to start growling at the other to stay away. Youre clutching the package to your chest now. 
“Have you ever been to a support group for uh- you know, the spouses of addicts?  I have a friend from work and shes really struggling.” 
Lees tone is sugary sweet, but the fake kind you put in diet soda except that stuff is way better. Joel sighs from the door. You stand there, dumbfounded on the porch steps because what the fuck is he going on about. 
You clear your throat, keeping your voice firm. “No. Ive never needed to.”  
Joels voice cuts in like a knife. “Been clean for almost twenty years now.”
“Yeah but, you know,” He shrugs, squinting a bit under the morning sun. “Relapses happen.”
Joel and Lee are at a stand still, and the moment Joel lets the arm leaning on the frame drop to his side, you know youre in for a lot of trouble. You move quickly towards the door. “We have to get ready for a- uh- a thing? but Im sorry about your friend.”
“Thank you, Mrs. Miller. Im doing my best to support her.” And before he turns away, he just has to be slimy to you. “If you need someone to talk to, Im here for you.”
“No, that really wont be necess-”
Joels slinging a strong arm around you to yank you back inside before shutting the door. 
“Motherfucker,” He hisses to himself, stomping through the walkway and into the kitchen.
“How-” You rub your eyes, letting them adjust to the light inside of the house. You put the package down onto the bar counter that opens up the kitchen and follow Joel to the fridge. “How does he know?? I thought-”
“Been living in this house for decades now,” His expression is tight, brows knitted together while he chugs a bottle of water. “People talk. ‘Specially if I'm being rolled into an ambulance on more than one occasion.” Joel frowns. “Fuck- I shoulda punched him in the fuckin’ face- Do you see how hard he tries so hard to flirt with you infront’a me?”
“I know, love. I was there.” You take the bottle from his hand and set it to the side, then wrap your arms around him. “Try not to let it get to you okay?”
Joel sighs into your hair, giving your body a squeeze. “I know, I know, but jus’ hearin’ him tryin’ta use my baggage to make a pass at you…S’fuckin’ evil.”
“I agree, but I dont want his blood on the driveway.”
“So get it on his driveway instead, got it.”
You giggle and tip your head up to kiss him. The tension eases from Joels shoulders, and he cups your cheeks, letting his worries melt away into your mouth. When the pads of his fingers start to slide under your tank top, youre leaning back. Youll be here for a while if this goes any further.
Joel mindlessly chases your lips, looking a bit pouty now that its over.
“Im gonna start getting ready for the barbecue, okay?”
“This early?”
“I like being punctual.” 
“My brother wont give a damn if were late.” He noses your jaw, pressing a kiss here and there. Your knees are beginning to feel weak. The bastard is trying to distract you.
“But I do. The farmers market opened today, and I promised Maria I'd get her fresh strawberries before we got there, remember?”
“Alright, alright.” He grumbles into your shoulder.
Joel lets you go, watching you round the bar counter to get your package and disappear upstairs.
-
Ever since you came down to a freshly showered Joel, and got into the car with the gift bags you prepared for Maria and Tommy, Hes been staring at you. One wrong move and the drools gonna start pouring out of his mouth.
Your hair is in its relatively natural state, freshly washed and shiny from the oil you put in it. You put on some light makeup, and went a bit heavy handed on the blush to look sunkissed, and topped it off with a flavored lip gloss Joel especially enjoys. 
Now, the dress. Its a pink floral mid-length dress, with a low cut sweetheart neckline and a corset style backing to cinch your waist and push out your chest. The material is thick and pretty, and there are two other layers under the skirt to keep its shape. You have on a pair of little pink pumps with little bows to match. 
The drive to the farmers market is fairly peaceful, the windows are half down and theres music playing at low volume on the radio. You and Joel have different tastes in music, but one genre you can always agree on is alternative rock. 
The weathers beautiful, sun high in the sky, and its not too hot or humid. The day really is perfect. Youre gonna soak up some sun when youre at the barbecue. Hopefully, they made lemonade again too.
Joel has been mostly quiet throughout your shopping. While it would worry some, youve been with him long enough to know that he just has a lot on his mind. What hes thinking about? Maybe youll learn when you make it back home at the end of the day.
You gasp, strolling through the grass to a stand with a mountain of apples. Granny smith, Macintosh, Pink Ladys, Honeycrisp, the works. He grunts, trying to keep the things that are already in your basket steady. You came for strawberries and are going to leave with much more than that.
Joel nudges you softly. “Remember, this is quality stuff, meaning itll go bad faster. Dont get too much.”
“Okay, got it.” You beam, and then begin inspecting the Pink Lady apples first, trying to find the ones with the best color.  He keeps the basket within reach so you can drop your picks in.
"These were Sarahs favorites."
"Oh yeah?"
"Yeah, it was funny 'cause we started arguin' over these or Red Delicious. I think Red Delicious is better."
"Thats so cute! Hmm. Should we get one for her? A Pink Lady?"
"Uh," He thinks on it for a moment, unsure, but the smile on your face helps him make a decision. "Sure, why not."
You drop two perfect Pink Ladys into the basket, moving onto the next pile.
“Hey, Joel.” You grin, holding out a wrinkled granny smith apple. “This one looks like you”
“Ha ha.” He deadpans, and grabs it from you to put back. In turn, hes reaching for the runt of the pile. A pathetically small one sitting near the bottom. “Now this one looks like you.”
“Does not!”
“Does too.” 
The next stand has golden kiwis, and youre practically dragging Joel forward to try them. You ask for one, and the man at the stand slices it into halves, giving you a plastic spoon to go with. 
You let Joel smell it first. “S’good.”
“Lets see if it tastes good.”
You sink your spoon into it, humming when you see how soft and easy it is to scoop out. In your mouth it goes!
Its tastes sweet, a bit mango-y and fucking delicious. You bounce in place, spoon feeding Joel next. “Oh yeah,” He smiles, smacking his lips a bit to really let the taste settle on his tongue. “Were takin’ some of these.”
You take one, then two, then three and four then five and as you reach for the sixth one, Joels stopping you with a gentle hand. 
“Darlin’.” 
“Right.” 
For the next few stands its just you and Joel trying various kinds of fruit. Starfruit, blueberries, some mangos, and then youre going back to the truck.
“I think my favorites were the mangos and golden kiwis. I hope Maria and Tommy have enough space in their fridge for all of this.”
“They moved into a bigger house, I reckon their fridge s’probably bigger, too.”
“What time is it?” 
You let go of Joels arm so he can switch the basket from one hand to the other. 
“‘Bout…” Hes squinting at his watch. “12:34 in the afternoon.”
“Oh! Guess we got the shopping done sooner than I expected. Hmm. Should we stop somewhere in the mean time?-" You snap your finger when you remember something. "They opened up this cafe that has cats in it! We can drink coffee and play with them for bit! The next fourty-five minutes will go by super fast."
“Youre gonna make Cement jealous.”
You bat your hand dismissively. “Hes not gonna caaare.” 
“Oh yes he will. And remind me again why we named our cat Cement?
“Uh, we were both drunk and had gotten him the day before without a name picked out?”
“A whole year later and we still kept it. Worst pet owners ever.” Joel chuckles, opening the passenger door for you like he always does. 
“Thank you.”
“Mhm.”
The giant basket of fruit goes into the back seat next to the gift bags before Joel slots himself into the drivers seat. 
You fumble with the radio a bit, trying to see what else is on but ultimately landing back on your preferred station. Theyve been playing a lot of Linkin Park recently. Hell yeah. Joel buckles himself in at last, and pulls out of the parking lot. 
“Marias gonna teach me how to make baked chicken,” You hum, gazing outside the window.
“You sure youre not jus’ unteachable?”
“Ha ha,” You lightly shove his shoulder, making him smile. “I thought you loved the meat sauce pasta I learned how to make.”
He settles into his seat more comfortably at the stop light, elbow rested on the window. “Got me with that one. Think I like ground turkey over beef, though.”
“Yeah? Me too. The beef tastes better but the turkey is lighter. Stops me from feeling all sick.”
“Agreed.”
Youre looking out the windshield now. Where did all the buildings go? Youre out of the city. 
“Uh, Joel?”
“Mm?”
“Where are we going?”
“Somewhere to kill time.”
“Yeah but where?”
“Youll see.” 
Your brows pinch together. “I see a whole lot of nothing except for trees."
“Almost there.”
Joel makes a hasty left turn onto some campgrounds. Your stomach starts to twist into excited knots. Is he gonna show you a baby deer or something? Bunnies? He used to be a park ranger for this area, and would tell you stories about all sorts of baby animals hed run into.
The car comes to a stop, and he turns the engine off. Silence.
“So…Were out in the woods to kill time?”
“Mhm.” Joel unbuckles his seat belt and twists into the back to grab the spare jacket he usually keeps there, then gets out of the truck and comes around the back to open the door for you. 
He holds your hand to help you get down from the passenger side, and as soon as both of your shoes hit the ground Joel is on you. 
You dont know where your hands should go, youve kissed Joel a thousand times and yet you still get so flustered when he catches you by surprise. You keep your hands on his shoulders for now, letting him press wet kisses to your neck and shoulder.
“This is new right? The dress?” He gives your ass an appreciative squeeze through the fabric. “Thought you looked so pretty when you came down stairs in it.” 
Your heads spinning. Something about your dress? 
“Woulda been okay if you let me have you earlier.” He pulls away, examining your flushed face cradled by his hand. Every part of you just fits so well in his palms. “Then I thought, why not have you now? We got time to spare.”
“Joel- We- Someone could see us-” You sputter, and Joels already shaking his head with a knowing smirk. He pulls you around to the bed of the truck, popping it open, only pausing to spread open the jacket he grabbed, just having just thrown it in there when he came around to get you.
“No ones gonna come lookin’ for us.” He turns you around, pushing you down onto your front. “As long as youre quiet.” 
Fuck. You really hate this game. At least, you like to tell yourself that.
Blood rushes to your ears while Joels rough palms lift up the skirt of your dress, exposing your ass and thighs to the cool air. He whistles from behind you. 
“Red lace panties?” His fingers dont shy away from tracing along the fabric covering your cunt. “This new too?”
You crane your neck over your shoulder to look at his face. “Uh.. Surprise?”
Joels smiling now, fingers dipping under the lace. “Thas' awfully sweet of you.”
His touch slips and slides around your growing wetness, then trails down to your clit. Your voice wobbles a bit and fuck- fuck hes going too fast. “Joel- Ah-” You whimper and try to push yourself up to look at him but his hand is steady on your spine, keeping you down. 
Smug, “Go on, sweetheart. Keep sayin’ my name. Jus’ like that.”
A whine escapes you when he pulls away, “Nooo.” You push your ass back, as if to entice him. You succeed, because hes skipped his usual routine of fucking you with his hands and is now unbuckling his belt.
Joel rolls you onto your back, and peels your underwear all the way off, bunching it up and shoving it into his back pocket. Your face burns just watching him.
“Think i'll hold onto these for a lil’ while.”
His hands push the back of your knees towards your chest, exposing your heat. Youll never get used to the way he just seems so interested just watching your cunt squeeze around nothing. 
“Thats-” You swallow, pushing yourself up onto your elbows. "Joel.”
“Relax." He coos, "Seen it a thousand times already, and ill be seein' it a thousand more. Get used to it, honey.”
Your attention flickers down to where his dick is about to meet your entrance. Joels nudging you down onto your back again and pulling the top of your dress down to expose your chest. Its when youre distracted that he actually moves to push himself in.
Both of you groan together, and Joel could never get bored of fucking you, not when your cunt just pulses around him everytime hes inside you.
Joel wastes no time fucking you once he eases all the way inside. Youre trying your best to keep quiet. Shit is no easy task. Its like Joel is trying to get you guys arrested.
He props himself up with a hand near your head, and lets the other keep one of your legs pinned open. The moans start to claw out of your throat. “Joel- Joel-” 
“Shh. Thas’ enough.” He growls through his teeth, fucking you harder. “Youre gonna- Gh- Get us caught-”
Something rustles between the trees, making you both freeze. You clasp your hands over your mouth, watching Joel straighten up to look around.
After a few seconds of squinting, Joel can see a few foxes moving about through the trees. Thank fuck. His shoulders visibly relax.
Hushed, “E-Everything okay?”
“Yeah, jus’ some animals.” 
And like that, hes back to it. His dick is going to make your eyes permanently stay rolled into your head. 
Joel is always just so handsome when hes pounding into you. His forehead gets shiny with sweat, and his jaw is tight from clenching his teeth, keeping himself quiet so he can focus on your moans. His face is noticeably redder against his usual farmers tan too. Really, hes just so attractive.
A flurry of yes and harder and fuck spills out of your mouth and into your palms. Not too loud, you try to remind yourself.
“Joel- S’too much-”
“Nah, thas’ not it.” He huffs, humorous. “You can take it. Y'always do. In fact, you love gettin’ your cunt bullied by me, aint that right?” As if to get his point across, he thrust in all the way to the hilt, making you keen. You forgot how to breathe, lungs drawing tight in your chest.
"Fuck," You manage to squeeze out.
Your palms push weakly at his shoulders, trying to ground yourself somehow. His head drops to the junction of your neck and shoulder, inhaling deeply.
“You good?” He checks in, breath hot on your skin. As if your crying isnt enough.
“So g-good, Joel- Fuck- Youre so good.” 
With a little nod, Joels pushing himself up, switching to slow and deep strokes, really digging himself into you, and trying to find that spot he likes to call home.
He massages your chest, then squeezes your sides and your hips and finally, his thumb finds your clit. Immediately, you jolt. 
“Oh fuck-” 
“Quiet.” And he says it to keep the charade going, even though his favorite thing is hearing your sobs.
His thumb rubbing incessantly against your that sweet little nub of yours. You choke, and Joels chuckling, watching the way you squirm, body not knowing whether it should lean into his touch because its too good or away because its too much.
It starts with this firey feeling under the pad of his thumb, then deep inside your stuffed cunt. Youre going to cum. 
Your hands fly to your mouth again, and you get all wide eyed from the sensation. Its cute. Your muscles pull taut, legs locking around Joels hips. Youre wailing into your palm when it happens.
“Good girl,” His voice soothes you through it. “Very good.”
He pets away the fly aways sticking to your sweaty face when its over. Your eyes drop shut while you catch your breath. 
Joels moving again now. He rolls his hips a few times, and thumb is building the foundation of another orgasm in you. Youre shaking badly.
Your words slur too, “Cant- Too soon- Joel- Joel-”
“Another one.” Joel says firmly, but breathless. 
Youre gasping, not sure where to focus your eyes. The trees around you look like theyre spinning. Your attention is back on Joel, whos looking rather satisfied watching you squirm and cry. If thats how wants to play, then fine.
Your hands slide up Joels biceps, and rests on the nap of his neck to bring him down. “Juh-Joel,” You pant, cradling his face with both hands. “Youre so good- The best-”
Oh, Joel likes that one, you can tell by the way he looks away briefly. Shyness. Excitement runs up your spine. Joel loves being told hes doing well. 
“You are- Nghh-” You swallow the drool in your mouth, trying to get the words out clearly. “The best husband I could ever ask for.”
Joel wheezes, head dropping into the curve of your shoulder. “Please.”
“S’true,” You nod rapidly, fingers curling into his hair. “Youre so good to me and-and youre mine and- Joel-  Im yours.”
“Jesus-” He groans, soaking up the feeling of you pressing kisses to his face and up his jaw. 
“Hhah-  No one else can have me, okay? No one- Not even-”
The name doesnt even come out of your mouth before Joels coming to a stop to slip his arms all the way around your middle. With the new leverage he has on your body, hes drilling his way into you. You fucking squeal, rules now long forgotten. Youre a useless ragdoll in his arms and he wouldnt have it any other way.
Your lips are shiny with spit and left over lip gloss, and he can still taste the mintiness in his tongue. Every now and again your eyes drop shut, but his dick just punches into your guts a little harder. Look at me. 
Your brain is mush, just the way he likes it, and youre perfectly pliant in his arms, babbling over how good you feel. Hes kisses along the valley of your breasts now, stopping to suck the flesh of your nipples.
Youre just so pretty. Even when you have bedhead, or youre snotty from a cold, or youre all dirty from working in the garden  youre still so pretty. Including now, all sweaty with you lipgloss all smudged and your mascara starting to run. Youre perfect. 
Joel grunts loud, jaw clenched tight as he gets lost in the feeling of your insides. His perfect little wife.
When he cums, hes doubling over with a loud grunt, getting a few last thrusts in before his spent floods your cunt.
Youre blinking away your tears, now watching the clouds inch along the sky. It really is a beautiful day. You pet Joels sweaty hair, and kiss the side of his temple. Your core throbs faintly. Jesus, he did a number on you.
“Love,” You say softly, patting his back.
“Mm?”
“Get up.” Another pat. “Youre squishing me.” 
Joel backs off to buckle himself up, but you stay seated to catch your breath and adjust your dress. At least it didnt get ripped during all the… Commotion. Not like last time.
“I need my underwear back.”
“Nope,”
“Joel.”
He kisses the center of your forehead and helps you down from the bed and into the passenger seat instead.  “Told you i'm keepin’ ‘em.”
You sputter, “I cant go to barbecue commando!”
“Sure you can.” He pops open the glove compartment and gets out some tissues, hand snaking under your dress again to clean you. You sigh softly at the sensation.
“Youre the worst.”
“I am indeed the worst.” Joel pulls the seatbelt over your chest and clicks it in. “You can tell me all about it on the way to Tommys.” 
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lostalioth · 4 months ago
Text
𝘯𝘴𝘧𝘸 𝘢𝘣𝘤’𝘴 ; 𝘴𝘵𝘦𝘷𝘦
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→ warnings: this is all written with a female reader in mind, smut [18+], all the dirty things that come with nsfw abcs :)
→ a/n: using old reliable nsfw abcs as a way of helping me warm back up to writing :) i havent written in SO LONG again but ive still been reading and my fixation on stevie is coming back strong so figure id use the pretty boy for nsfw abcs
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A = Aftercare (what they’re like after sex)
I think Steve was a bit lame at aftercare in the beginning with past partners, he would clean them off when needed and offer water but that was about it.
Eventually the older he got the better he got with it, and the more he understood the importance of it. A part of him even found it to be his favorite thing to help you calm down and come down from your high slowly. Cooing at you and praising how well you did for him as his hands brush down your arms, your sore and shaking thighs that are still wrapped around his waist to soothe you. He’d clean the both of you up and get you fresh clothes and water. Steve lulling you to sleep in his arms with small kisses to your face and shoulders and whispers of even more praise.
B = Body part (their favorite body part of theirs and also their partner’s)
His favorite on himself although it isn't exactly a body part, is his hair of course. He has always prided himself on his hair looking good, always making sure each strand was in place, it started as a vanity thing. However after he notices just how much you loved playing with his hair, running your fingers through it, tugging it, even styling when he gave in after a week of you begging him. His love and pride in it grew tenfold once it became something you loved about him.
His favorite on you would be in all honesty your tits. He's a simple man, no matter their size his hands are gonna gravite to them, rest his hand there when you're cuddling, grope and knead them under your shirt, lay his head on them rambling on and on about how soft they are.
C = Cum (anything to do with cum, basically)
Steve cums a lot and by a lot, I do mean A LOOTT. He honestly doesn't understand it but it's always been that way and because of it if he doesn't use a condom or have you swallow it, it's quite a lot and hard to clean up. Sometimes he loves making you an absolute mess, covered in his cum, sweat and saliva from his mouth exploring, kissing and licking every inch of your body. Steve being well aware of just how much he cums was amazed and admittedly a bit impressed the first time he cums down your throat. He had assumed it would be too much for you so the first time you had him in your mouth and he felt himself get close he tried to pull out so he could cum on your tits.
”Fuck babe im gonna- god im gonna cum” he nearly whines out as your head bobbed, taking his whole length down your throat. He attempts to pull his hips back to pull out of your mouth. You hum around his dick and look up at him with a begging look as you grab hold of his hips, digging your nails in pulling him back closer. The assertiveness of your move stuns Steve for a moment as red hot pleasure consumes him and before he can stop it, he is cumming down your throat. He watches in near shock as while his cock is still sitting heavy on your tongue you swallow all his cum down. He knows his pupils are blown wide as he stares at you, slipping your mouth off him and looking up at him. A cocky and proud smile starts to worm its way on your face. "Good girl—That's a good fucking girl. Fuck baby" he groans as he dives down to capture your lips in a heated kiss, the latter of his sentance mumbled against your lips.
D = Dirty secret (pretty self explanatory, a dirty secret of theirs)
He loves the idea of you dominating him. He has always been the dominant one in his past relationships, he feels that that's how it's supposed to be. However he can't deny that he likes the moments in bed when you boss him around telling him exactly what to do to please you and he obeys. He can't deny how much he likes when you praise him and call him a good boy when he does something you ask even if it's in a joking matter when he goes and grabs your phone you left in his room when you ask. To him it's his dirty secret, what Steve doesn't know is that you picked up on this little fantasy of his. It was one night after he had a long shift at work and he had practically begged you to let him eat you out cause all he wanted was to please you.
E = Experience (how experienced are they? do they know what they’re doing?)
I’d say Steve has pretty average experience. He’s had girlfriends, he's had hookups and one night stands. The only thing he wasn't all that experienced with was kinks. He has nothing to worry about though because you're there to help him out and teach him about all your kinks as well as aid him with discovering and testing his own out.
F = Favorite position (this goes without saying)
Steve loves any position where he gets to watch your face. The way it contorts in pleasure, your eyes screwing shut and your jaw falling open in either a sharp gasp or a wonton moan when you cum. He also loves holding you therefore his absolute favorite position would have to be when you're straddling him, your chest pressed to his as he is laid back on the bed. His knees bent so his hips can set a punishing and hard pace jackhammering up into you. His large hands cupping the sides of your face forcing you to look at him as he thrusts deep inside you.
“Fuck look at me, there we go sweet girl” Steve coos as he holds your face forcing you to hold eye contact. “There's my pretty girl.. Hii baby” a smirk blooms on his face as his hips speed up, his tip abusing that one spot deep inside you. The pleasure makes it harder to keep your eyes open and look at him. You whimper and mumble something that comes out as gibberish, too lost in the bliss and basking in his attention to form real words.
G = Goofy (are they more serious in the moment? are they humorous? etc.)
He’d be goofy at the start, smiling big and teasing you softly. Play fighting with you and tickling your sides would eventually morph into your hands pinned above your head and his mouth attacking your tits. Legs around his waist trying to shift your hips to grind your ass against the growing bulge in his jeans. The teasing wouldn't stop however he'd be a bit more serious the more into the moment the two of you became.
H = Hair (how well groomed are they? does the carpet match the drapes? etc.)
it would entirely depend on how you preferred him, he never used to bother with grooming himself down there as he had no complaints but if you preferred him to be more groomed he’d do it without hesitation. If you didn't care about it, he'd leave it. All he wants is to please you, he has no preference when it comes down to it so he defers to you for it.
I = Intimacy (how are they during the moment? the romantic aspect)
Steve gets very into the moment. He loves kissing all over your body as his hips thrust into you. Praise spilling out of his lips as you ride him, his arms wrapped around your torso holding you close to him. The man adores you, even when he's being desperate and rough and fast he makes sure to still hold you close and tell you he loves you as his hips bounce off yours hard enough you know there will be bruises in the morning.
J = Jack off (masturbation headcanon)
He does it probably more than he'd ever admit to you. He just gets so needy for you and knowing you're busy at work he’ll usually resort to fisting his cock. A pair of your panties you let him keep shoved against his nose, needing your scent to get him off. His head full of memories of your body under his, on top of his, your mouth on him, his tongue buried in your pussy, even images of new things he wants to try with you aid him and push him closer and closer to the edge. Jerking off however very rarely satiates him enough to where he wont be on you the second you walk through the door. Nothing does it good enough for him except his girl.
”Fuck sweetheart i missed you, i needed you so bad baby” he whines as he grinds his hips up against you, he had you pinned to the couch not even 10 seconds after greeting you at the door. “Had to rub one out so i didnt bug you at work” his voice came out full of desperation. “Stevie..” you whine out as he begins kissing down your neck. “Nothing is as good as this prefect fucking pussy though” he lets out a low groan as he starts working at getting you out of your work uniform.
K = Kink (one or more of their kinks)
Steve wasn't all that knowledgeable of kinks until you and boy did you help him learn. He loves praising you, watching your eyes sparkle and lit up when he tells you how good you're doing. He secretly loves when you praise him back, it makes an unusual feeling settle in his chest as it wasnt something he was used to hearing. He has a slight size kink, he likes when his body looms over yours and how delicate his large hands make your body look. On the very rare occasion as well he can be quite sadistic sometimes. He loves choking you as well, not like hardcore but lightly and he wouldn't be opposed to it being returned.
L = Location (favorite places to do the do)
The bedroom is Steve's favorite place. He knows that's boring but it gives him the most time and space as well as comfort to do as he pleases with you. Not that you guys haven't done it in other places, when you're feeling risky and both of you are extra needy you've done it in a bedroom at a house party, the bathroom at work, the back of Steve's car was the easiest place in your youth for the two of you to have alone time. Those places are just never as good as when Steve has you spread out on his bed where you don't have to worry about being quick or being caught.
M = Motivation (what turns them on, gets them going)
Just about anything you do. This man is so deeply obsessed and in love with you that something as simple as him looking at you, taking a sip of water and watching your thorat bob as you swallow would have him straining against his boxers. Watching you sit and do your makeup, a look of focus on your face as you concentrate would have him sneaking up behind you to kiss along the side of your neck up to your ear trying his hardest to break said focus. One look from you with a flutter of your eyelashes and a smile would have him on his knees begging you to leave a party earlier so you two can head home. A brush of your lips against his and he has to refrain from blowing his load in his pants like an inexperienced teenager.
“Baby i think i'm addicted to you” steve lets out a groan as he watches you glide around the house cleaning up after a large party. He sat up on the kitchen counter not being much of a help. Your hips swaying to the music playing softly in the background for ambiance nearly had the man drooling.
N = No (something they wouldn’t do, turn offs)
Anything you don't like or aren't comfortable with. Hed do or try just about anything you ask, if it pleases you and you like it thats enough to turn him on.
O = Oral (preference in giving or receiving, skill, etc.)
Steve LOVVEESSS being between your thighs, his tongue lapping at your cunt like a starved man. He doesn't eat pussy for his pleasure he does it for yours, all he cares about is your pleasure. He loves feeling you slowly lose yourself on his mouth, threading your fingers through his hair and holding him there as you cum with a loud drawn out moan of his name leaving your mouth. His preference is giving because when he's receiving?
He has a bit of a hard time holding it in, your mouth is like kryptonite or something cause the second the warmth of your pretty mouth envelopes his cock he's a goner. He turns into a whimpering, stuttering mess mumbling about how pretty you are, how good you are at sucking him off, how much he loves you.
“Sweet girl– shit go easy on me please baby or im gonna cum before we even get started” he whines as his hips buck up into your mouth.
P = Pace (are they fast and rough? slow and sensual? etc.)
Depends entirely on the mood, if the two of you have time steve is slow and sensual. Kissing down your body, working you open for his cock with his fingers or mouth. Slow making out as he slides inside you. Still a bit rough as Steve loves to watch as bruises and marks appear on both your bodies, marking you as his and him equally as yours.
But if you’re both needy and desperate for each other it's usually faster and just as rough, rushed foreplay, sloppy kisses, teeth clashing and hands everywhere nearly ripping each other's clothes off. Steve pleading and begging for you to cum for him.
Q = Quickie (their opinions on quickies, how often, etc.)
They aren't a rare or a frequent occurrence. They're more of a situational thing, when the two of you start something only to realize one of you is gonna be late to work if you don't hurry up or you have friends coming over in 10 minutes.
R = Risk (are they game to experiment? do they take risks? etc.)
Steve loves trying new things, anything and everything as long as you're comfortable with it. If you veto it then the two of you don't try it, the same goes for if he vetoes it but there is quite literally nothing he wouldn't let you do to him. He trusts you and would never say no to you.
S = Stamina (how many rounds can they go for? how long do they last?)
He has fairly standard if not a bit high stamina, going at least 3-4 rounds before he feels like his balls have been drained but give him a few hours and a slow makeout session and he’ll be ready to go again. He is fast to recover.
There are certain instances where steve is too weak for you though that he doesn't last as long.
T = Toys (do they own toys? do they use them? on a partner or themselves?)
Steve would own a vibrator that the two of you use on occasion but usually the two of you are so lost in the pleasure of each other's touch and bodies on their own that you both long forget about using it most of the time. Steve mostly uses it when he wants to overstimulate you by making you come over and over.
U = Unfair (how much they like to tease)
Ohh he loves teasing you all the time, and you love teasing him. It's like a game of tit for tat with the two of you. Steve will tease you while you're at work and even more when you come home before giving in. Though he's a little shit about it and if it starts to be too much he wont stop. "Aw, it hurts? Too bad. you're gonna keep taking it until i’m satisfied sweet girl” he chuckles softly and grips your hip harder as his thrusts speed up.
The next day as payback you'd prance around the house in only panties and one of his t-shirts and tease him all day right back. Then he’d return the teasing again and so the cycle continues.
V = Volume (how loud they are, what sounds they make, etc.)
When Steve's needy he's offly vocal, begging, whining and whimpering how much he wants you, needs you. And when you give in somehow he gets louder.
“Shit! Fuck! Princess mmm you feel so good god, i love ya’ baby”
Verus when you're the needy one and he's in a dominant mood, you're the very vocal one and he's fairly quiet, so he can hear all the pretty noises you make. He is often too focused as well on you to talk much besides the occasional filth leaving his mouth when he cant hold it back and he cums.
"You look so pretty like this sweetheart"
"That's it. That's my girl fuck”
W = Wild card (a random headcanon for the character)
He likes buying you pretty lingerie and pjs. He just likes buying you cute and pretty clothes. It makes his girl happy and she just looks so pretty in everything he buys and gives him a little fashion show. One that may or may not normally end with you in his lap, his hand around your neck and his cock buried inside you. Praise and compliments mumbled against your lips. It's a win-win situation really.
X = X-ray (let’s see what’s going on under those clothes
He's pretty above average. Standing around 8 inches hard and his girth is enough to give you that addictive stinging stretch when he first slips inside everytime. He was popular with the ladies for a reason, though most found him a bit too much to take. You however take it like a champ and Steve almost loses it every time he bottoms out with how tight your pussy squeezes him.
Y = Yearning (how high is their sex drive?)
Above average that's for sure and Steve will swear it used to be normal before you, but he just can't help it. He's obsessed with you and as stated before everything you do turns him on. His sex drive and desire for you are often what lead him to overstimulating you as he always wants you to cum more than once.
"You can give me another one, can't you baby? for me, come on please?" Steve begs as he looks at you through lust blown pupils, a small pleading smile on his face. Sweat dripping down his forehead as his hips snap against yours, your pussy red and puffy after you've already came twice. “Steve i dont think I can baby…” you whine and try pushing at his chest. “Come on princess, one last time and ill be done” he smirks and speeds up his hips and rubs his thumb in circles on your abused and throbbing nub.
Z = Zzz (how quickly they fall asleep afterwards)
Steve will wait for you to fall asleep first, not that he isn't tired but he often stays awake until you succumb to sleep in case you need him to get you anything. Your body is usually a bit weak and your legs wobbly after sex so he offers to get you whatever you need. Once you are sound asleep against his chest though he will kiss your head and snuggle closer to your warm body before drifting off himself.
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→ a/n: send me some requests lovilies i need to get back to writing before kinktober!! also sorry for any mistakes im a tad rusty.
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satoruhour · 11 months ago
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oh my god, i dont know if you write for this specifically (feel free to disregard if you don’t), but I’ve been thinking about satosugu x reader,,, imagine kissing the both of them!! spending a nice summer day with them!! just being able to enjoy spending time with the two of them!! I dont know if its my love for both of these characters and their relationship, but i just like thinking abt that dynamic,,,
a/n: wrote this yesterday to upload today since it was a loaded day today ❤️ enjoy. hope it’s up to standard cause i havent written fluff in a long time! / 1.3k, poly!satosugu x reader
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sleep-ins were popular amongst the three of you. before you, suguru had his own routine of waking up early to brew some tea for himself, to get the laundry going . .
satoru, on his own, was a light sleeper, sitting straight up at any hint of sound due to his sorcerer duties but after moving in with geto, he’s been letting the long-haired man to do all the work.
and here came you, waltzing back into their lives (and apartment) after teaching at kyoto for just a few months until you couldn’t stand gakuganji and headed right back to your alma mater.
it wasn’t difficult to maintain the dynamic the three of you had from your school days, except maybe unspoken feelings and lingering glances until the two men were gassing each other up to ask you.
you’re not even sure how you even got roped in — old feelings, a crave for the younger days, the allure of satoru, the wonder of suguru — but now you’re stick in between both of them wanting to pee so badly.
alas, your body is trapped under gojo’s protective leg and geto’s gentler wrapped arm, but you still feel your bladder about to burst, trying one last time until your body is slammed back into bed.
“hm . . what’re you doing?” is gojo’s first raspy call out to you as he curls his calf around you even more, and you sigh, turning to him to brush his fringe from his face.
“i need to pee, satoru.”
“no.” and you roll your eyes because he’s always whiny like that and you’d usually employ suguru to do your bidding but he’s fast asleep, still. this was another thing: both you and gojo have inextricably fucked with his routine because now he’s more inclined to sleep in than drink his morning tea. he realised this one day when he was doing laundry, in the afternoon.
“’toru, pleeaasee?” you pout even if he can’t see and like a good boyfriend, he senses your features pulled into a face specifically meant to make him feel bad, and cracks his eyes open.
“oh, youuuu—” gojo scrunches up his eyes and squeezes, and then steals you from geto’s arm, trapping you with tight arms wound around your middle, “stop it with the eyes!”
you giggle, using your free hands to relax the tightness in his brows, using that opportunity to forcibly open his eyes and then you hit him again — knitted eyebrows and doe eyes, and a perfect pout that has gojo grumbling under his breath. silently, you wiggle yourself just enough to reach his face so you can place a peck on his lips and he hums.
another, his eyes say and you indulge him, sinking into his embrace and letting him guide you back to his mouth. morning breath is nothing to the both of you, grinning into the kiss when satoru loses himself and his embrace starts to loosen. the kiss still holds you captive, though, the other moaning softly when you deepen it with some tongue.
“you’re just going to leave me hangin’?” geto’s voice calls out from beside you, and gojo’s excited suguru! gives you just that sliver of time to slip away from the two as they catch up but—
“you’re not going anywhere, missus,” gojo pulls on your arm and you’re falling back into your space in the middle of the both of them, greeted with geto’s lovely laugh and his gentle gaze.
“good morning my loves,” he says, arm draped over the both of you before he leans down to give you a kiss while gojo replies with a good morning as well, also giving a peck to your temple. “what’s on the agenda today?”
“lazing in—”
“i need to pee, firstly,” you pipe up, cutting gojo off and patting his puffed out cheeks. grabbing his face, you wiggle his head just to emphasise your point, “your man here has been preventing me from going to the bathroom.”
“ahem! our man,” gojo corrects, sticking his tongue out just enough to lick your hand and you shriek in disgust while his giggles only fill the room.
“satoru, c’mon, let her go.” and again, the other only cuddles you closer to him, long, lanky limbs trapping your body. geto has a hand on yours like he’s trying his best to console you.
“but— she’s so much nicer to cuddle! did i ever tell you suguru once hit me in the face with his arm?”
and you laugh while the other only sighs and chaos erupts once he stands up and says in faux disappointment — “okay, i’m making breakfast for myself only. guess i lost two partners today.”
“hello?! i didn’t even do anything!” you shout in incredulity, words muffled once gojo slaps a hand over your mouth and laughs, watching through the bathroom mirror at how he chuckles at the both of you. you lick gojo’s hand and he moans obnoxiously.
geto did end up making the both of you some breakfast after some convincing (it was mostly gojo yelling “pleasepleaseplease” in the bathroom and interrupting brushing teeth time), but he’s got around it with a sloppy kiss given to the both of you, sat at the wooden table you commissioned — large enough to bring friends over but small enough for it to feel intimate with your two boyfriends.
“on the real agenda, we need to go for some grocery shopping,” geto suggests, reaching diagonally to you to wipe off the bits of strawberry lingering at the corner of your lips and gojo shouts a loud oh!, running from the table to grab his phone that he’s left on the bedside table. naturally, he has become so enamoured with the both of you that he doesn’t even need his phone to entertain him that much.
“i made the list like you asked, sugu,” and you’re giggling when you see his eyebrow raise, positive that on the list, there was more of what the house didn’t need than what it did.
silently, you’re helping to clear all three of your plates that had coatings of maple syrup on it, apart from gojo’s who licked his squeaky clean. a smile spreads across your face when you hear them bicker, a common occurrence.
“baby, there’s more candy than actual groceries on here.”
“but suguruuuu . .” gojo pulls this all the time and it hardly works on geto any more, so the both of them invade your cleaning escapades to argue. like the devil on one shoulder and the angel on the other, satoru sucks up to your boyfriend, suguru appeals to you.
“should we listen to him?” leaning against the counter, geto rests his arm around your torso, sidling right up to your face who only gives him a small grin.
gojo follows suit. “sweetness, don’t listen to him. you know you love the sweets i buy, i’ll even buy you your favourite brand!”
here in this kitchen in the house that gojo had no problem expanding to accommodate the both of you were all that you know in this mess of a world, destined to exorcise curses for as long as you live, but it wasn’t so bad when you had the strongest duo beside you, talking over each other on whether meiji chocolate was more important than buying celery for tonight’s dinner. 
“boys.” turning off the tap, you shake off the water and turn around in their arms only to see what had escalated: geto ready to summon a curse, gojo crossing his fingers in his muryōkūsho pose, all the while keeping an arm around you like everything’s fine. and as chaotic dating the both of them were, you don’t mind putting both their hands down and calming the situation down.
with a laugh, you give one kiss to both cheeks. “let’s just buy both, okay?”
and satoru leaps to hug you, planting endless kisses on your face while suguru sighs, then smiles, defeated. “plus, we can just make ’toru pay for everything, can’t we?”
“and then make him cook tonight.” you suggest, not-so-quietly.
gojo stops, “hey!”
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i didnt write the grocery shopping part since i alr rambled off about it here but maybe next time we’ll see :)
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blvdymary · 6 months ago
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Office Hours
pairing: Thomas Shelby x Reader
Summary: Your annoying boss and his annoying behaviour.
Genre: Fluff
Word count: 1.03K
Note: Yall...I'm out of ideas that's why ı havent written anything...IM SORRY.
⋅───⊱༺ ♰ ༻⊰───⋅
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Every girl in this city would sacrifice their lives to be in your place as Thomas Shelby's Personal Secretary, mostly because they think being his secretary means they get to have "fun" with him while in reality that's NOT the case AT ALL. He's always moody, mean, and rude to YOU. Not anyone else, YOU.
Always seeing him laugh -well, not really "laugh" but you know what I mean- with other women working alongside you. Was it something you did? Was it your attitude? well, you didn't really have an attitude. Always known as the shy and calm girl before he ruined it and made you like him. Moody, mean, and rude.
But right now you had a job, more like a chore. And It's to bring him his whiskey and documents as if he didn't have a whole ass collection of whiskey in his office.
You walked into your boss's office, holding a glass of whiskey as he requested for you to bring him. His feet crossed and thrown onto the desk, he looked at the simple document in his left hand while holding his cigarette with the other. Business was the priority and you were well aware of that.
He didn't even waste any energy acknowledging you came into his office. Typical Shelby. Thinking he is always seated on a pedistool, higher up from us "peasants".
You put his requested glass of whiskey on his desk, not yet noticing that he started looking at you with annoyance portrayed all over his face. "You're late," he spoke with his husky voice.
"I- I'm not-?" You muttered surprised as you looked down at him in the eyes you so adored from a distance. "You were supposed to be here with my whiskey AND documents at 4. It's 4:03." You rolled your eyes internally at his words, are you fucking kidding me? That's all you could think of. Is this guy messing with me?
You let out a soft sigh, putting on a fake frowny face as you widen your eyes at him. "Oh, please excuse me, sir. I didn't intend on being late." pulling out the documents out of the little bag you were carrying, just before you lowered them onto the desk in front of him he took them aggressively out of your grasp, leaving you in shock and making you think why he was aggressive today.
"Are you okay, sir?" Really? You knew it wasn't your place to comfort him but how could you control yourself when he was acting this way towards YOU?
"I need you to arrange a meeting with Mr. Solomons for me." He took a sip from his glass as he skimmed through the documents you brought for him.
He noticed you were still standing next to him, waiting for him to speak. "Go on. Go do your job." He dismissed you, shooing you away with a small motion of his hand as if you were a dog to him. Did that make you furious? yes. Could you do anything about it? No, not really, so you left rolling your eyes when you reached the door and shutting it behind you.
You were too furious to feel his eyes gaze at you as you walked away, smiling to himself as he muttered under his breath while shaking his head.
"What a darling thing, hm?"
You walked back into your chair and plopped onto it before sighing loud enough for Thomas to hear but you were glad he didn't. You were close to the line of getting fired from all your attitude towards your dear boss.
You looked up and saw your co-worker and best friend, Rosemary. The worry in her eyes was real, unlike other people who have been in your life before.
"Sweetie, are you okay? She asked with her unmistakable accent, she wasn't from around here so it was quite hard to get used to her accent but you managed.
"I don't know what I'm doing wrong, Rosie. Is there a proper reason for why he's acting this way towards me?" She fake-cleared her throat. "And you." You rolled your eyes, smiling. It was true, He didn't like both of you, but he despised you more. It was clear that he wanted you out of this company.
"Well darling, I think you should talk to him about it. How are we supposed to know why he acts this way towards you without talking?"
Oh if only it was that easy Rosie. Of course, It was easy for her to say, she lacked shyness. Probably because she didn't know how things worked around here but we won't be talking about that right now.
"Come on, go and talk to him." now she was dragging you to his office?! Oh, she was bold. You tried pulling away but her grip was strong, too strong almost.
It wasn't long before she opened his door without knocking and threw you inside, closing the door behind you. Shit. There was no going back now.
"Is there something you need?" He was, of course, annoyed at you. Not Rosie, you.
You walked closer to his desk with shaky hands and took a deep breath before speaking. "I uh…I just don't understand why you're acting…this way towards me. Was it something I did or…?"
"Sit down."
Shit. Did you say something you weren't supposed to or something? You sat down at one of the chairs in front of his desk, putting your hands on your knees. Was it that obvious that you were nervous? Why was he looking at you like that? oh god-
"I must say I find you fascinating. And I would like to ask if you'd like to have dinner with me. Business related, of course."
What? What kind of joke was this? You let out a breath you didn't even know you were holding before responding.
"I uh…sure, I guess."
"Well then, you may leave now." He gestured towards the door, still holding that cold expression on his face as if he didn't just ask you out.
You stood up, leaving as quickly as possible, running towards Rosemary's chair. She just HAD to know what happened.
⋅───⊱༺ ♰ ༻⊰───⋅
taglist: @hiraethberry @1-fuzzy-squirrels @justcallme1anangel @tejasvkris @rosierosem @meowsicles39
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saerins · 2 years ago
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─── & 𝐀𝐆𝐀𝐈𝐍
+ itoshi sae x f!reader | wc 4k | content: slight angst, established relationship, friends/exes to lovers, hurt/comfort, breakup, mentions of jealousy, implied adults here
notes: DISCLAIMER I HAVENT WRITTEN PROPERLY IN A WHILE so it’s probably quite shitty but i missed him ok !!! T_T sobs i hope you guys like this one <3
summary: sae’s still learning the ropes on being in a relationship, and sometimes you think you can’t wait any longer. but this is itoshi sae, maybe you can.
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sae hates this sickly tension in the air.
your brows are furrowed and you’re biting your lower lip; it’s the look of confusion that he’s not very used to, but is most aware of anyway. it’s the look you always carry when you’re upset and conflicted and you’re trying not to say any more than you already have on the off chance that you’d cry after you do.
it’s not your fault for getting jealous—sae knows that. all it is is an unfortunate byproduct of him not being around as much as you need him to. but in his head, his mind tells him one thing only: how can you expect him to when that’s what his career entails?
didn’t you know that before agreeing to be his girlfriend?
maybe you’re painfully aware of how it’s neither of your faults, and maybe that’s why you’re really confused. because there’s no one to blame. sae wasn’t to blame for having to show up at an event with some famous actress. he was doing his job. he had told you not to go, but somehow oliver had taken it upon himself to invite you anyway.
“i’m at every event with a different girl, the tabloids wouldn’t suspect a thing about her being your girlfriend, right?”
famous last words because sae’s going to have to kill him one day for that.
beside you on the couch, sae’s head falls to his hands, elbows propped on his knees. it’s not your fault either, he realises, for not being able to take it when you experience firsthand how people gush over him and saiko, the actress. you aren’t used to this life. maybe you shouldn’t have to.
“i don’t know what to do anymore, sae.”
after an entire hour of arguing how he should at least talk to you about these things instead of throwing them under the rug, after an entire hour of how sae tried to defend himself by saying he couldn’t possibly read your mind—you’re both exhausted.
“well i don’t fucking know neither,” he confesses, half snaps, and his head is still in his hands. he knows you’re looking at him, wanting to search his expression for answers that he can’t give verbally. but sae doesn’t want you to see him like this, unsure and conflicted, almost as much as you.
through your eyes, you’ve never felt more rejected than you do when you look at your entire world and see it refuse to let you in. his hair is a mess now, from running after you in the rain, his expression is unreadable and his clothes soaking through his body. sae is always like this when there’s a fight—always avoiding the hard conversations.
and maybe you would’ve let it slide if you’re sure of his feelings for you, but you’re not. you’ve been friends with sae for three years, been together with him for six months. but in all this time, he’s never actually told you how he feels for you. not a small utterance of his love, or any indication of his feelings through text.
no matter how strong or optimistic you are, you aren’t sure if you can last any longer like this.
“sae, can you answer me honestly?”
he doesn’t say a thing, but you know he’s listening. he always does. which is why it hurts even more when he doesn’t do anything whenever you argue. because you know that out of everyone, itoshi sae best knows what you need.
but he won’t do it.
“do you still want this?”
a suffocating silence blankets the room, and after an agonising two minutes, you get your answer in his silence.
slowly, you get up off the couch, and you can almost laugh at why your impending departure is the only thing that can make him look at you.
“i’m sorry, sae, i can’t do this anymore,” you tell him, smiling even though you’re crying, and for a moment, the way he widens his beautiful teal eyes and how he instinctively reaches out to grab your wrist almost breaks you. but you’ve decided, and it’s too late now. “i’ll find an apartment and move out as soon as i can.”
when sae watches you retreat to your shared bedroom and lock the door, he realises by the plunging of his heart that he’s not okay with this. that he’s not okay with letting you leave. it’s stupid why he can’t even find the fucking words to say because he does, he does want this.
that’s why he rushes to the door, knocks rapidly in succession only to hear silence in return. and now he knows exactly how you feel. you’ve always been the vocal one, always been there—armed with your assurances that you never realised he needed, coupled with your smile that drives every negativity in his head away.
“y/n, open the door,” sae tries, but you don’t respond. he hears the tap switching on and he’s cursing himself in his head. his forehead presses against the white wooden surface, unable to bring himself away. “y/n, talk to me.”
for the first time since he met you, you don’t listen.
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the next morning is even more torturous than the night sae spent not sleeping.
when you finally come out of the room, you feel like a stranger. your hair’s done up, your makeup fresh, the smile on your face is still gone.
“morning.”
your eyes flick up to meet his as you walk to the kitchen, but they don’t light up like they used to. he can see you swallowing the lump in your throat before you choke out a good morning in return, though it’s strained.
have you been crying all night?
“listen, can we talk about last night?” sae asks, but it’s futile.
the way you close the fridge door carelessly sits uncomfortably with him, only because he feels like he recognises you even less. the way you smile after that is so forced he would rather you didn’t.
“oh right, about that, good news,” you try to sound chirpy, but it settles awkwardly between the both of you. “i managed to find some listings, so i’m gonna go check them out. fingers crossed i’ll be out of your hair soon!”
you’re prancing around the kitchen like a madwoman, humming tunes he doesn’t know and playing the part of not you all too well.
“y/n, i don’t want you to—”
“stop, sae,” you cut him off, heart broken and head buried in the cupboard.
he saunters to your side, not daring to get too close to you, afraid you’d just retreat further away. “tell me what i can do.” a part of him wants you to ask him that question again, so that he can answer now. so that he can tell you how he really feels.
but it doesn’t come. you’re just staring blankly at the wall.
when his gaze falls to your neck, he realises that necklace he gave you isn’t there like it used to be everyday. his heart sinks even further. “you’re not wearing it anymore?”
it’s stupid of him to expect you to. as of last night, you both were as good as broken up, after all.
“y/n, can we talk? i really—”
“sae, enough,” you utter through gritted teeth. “i don’t want to hear it anymore.”
—love you. that’s what he wants to say. but you’re past caring, it seems.
sae’s lips are sewn tightly shut after that, both of you eating breakfast in silence. you’re eating what you cooked, some sausages and a sunny egg and toast while sae’s stuck with cereal because you usually do all the cooking.
you don’t look at him, and he doesn’t look at you. the hands on the analog clock are all either of you hear aside from your own chewing.
“at least let me drive you,” sae says as you head for the door, slipping into your sneakers.
your hand hovers over the doorknob, as though you’re considering it, and for a minute sae is hopeful, but then the next minute, you pour water over his fire.
“it’s fine, i can manage fine on my own.”
for some reason, sae feels like you’re telling him that for much more than just today.
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days pass and you’ve barely spoken two words to each other. sae finds himself taking the chance to look at you much more than he has before; you still look tired. maybe it’s from all the house visiting, or maybe it’s the outcome of being with him. he’s still not okay with you moving, with you not being in his life, but sae’s stuck at a loss of what to do.
you’d been spearheading this relationship all this time that now, sae has no idea what to do. any attempt at a conversation is thwarted by you, and any time he comes near you, you relegate to the room and lock yourself in there.
sae’s taken his necessities and moved to the guest bedroom, and he thinks it’s so stupid to think that sleeping in a different room is better than being at a different apartment altogether.
but how long until you find a suitable apartment and move out? how long until sae has zero chance at being able to see you again?
“that sounds like a you problem though.”
as sae sits across the booth and deadpans at his younger brother, he thinks maybe the most useless thing you’ve ever done is repairing their relationship. especially with rin mumbling useless shit like that.
“yeah, thanks for the help,” sae rolls his eyes, watching as rin pops a nugget into his mouth.
“why didn’t you answer her then?” rin surveys his older brother’s movements; uncomfortable, awkward, reserved. he’s amazed that anyone can get sae like this, if he’s honest. he doesn’t usually give a shit about anything that doesn’t concern himself.
sae sighs. if he knew, he wouldn’t be here. he’d be with you, trying to explain how fucked up he is and why he didn’t say shit when he should’ve. but now, you won’t even give him the chance to talk without shutting yourself away.
rin groans, thoroughly annoyed because unbeknownst to his brother, you’d already filled rin in on everything. besides, you’re kind of already like a sister to him anyway. and you’re better at being an older sibling than sae is, granted.
“do you still want her though?” rin asks. it’s kind of tiring, being in the middle, being told by both parties to not say a thing to the other. he’s also tired of sae and his cryptic messages when he wants advice but is too proud to outright ask for it. and also of you whining in his messages about how if sae keeps this up you can’t keep being strong about this anymore.
“yeah.”
sae’s answer is surprisingly simple, and rin is entirely unamused.
“yeah maybe i see why she left you.”
“excuse me?”
rin meets his brother’s gaze, unrelenting. “you still want her yet you’re here telling me about it instead of her. i think you’d win best boyfriend of the millenia award.”
rin is dripping with sarcasm and maybe if he wasn’t his brother sae would’ve already punched him. but by the end of the night, sae can only come to one conclusion; it’s his fault for not talking it out when he could. so he could either let you go, or try, just like you did before.
he’d have to do it tonight, unless he wants to wait another month after his match next week in the states. but if he does, you’d be gone by then, he knows it. so he has to make it tonight.
and he’s hopeful, because he’ll make it fucking work no matter what he has to do. he’s not going to back down that easily, not anymore. and he knows it’s late and it’s 11pm and you’re probably asleep but fuck, you’re just going to have to wake up when he pounds hard on the bedroom door.
which is exactly what he plans to do—wake you up, talk to you, and tell him how fucking stupid he is and that he’s sorry and he fucked up.
it probably won’t make up for all the times he failed to speak when he should’ve, but sae thinks it’s a start.
so he unlocks the front door and walks straight to your bedroom door, but when he reaches up to knock it, he realises it isn’t even locked. when he slowly opens the door, you aren’t even there.
sae knows what to expect, but he still opens the closet anyway. and all the drawers. and inspects the bathroom. but every trace of you is gone. even the photos in the living room that had been all framed up. it’s no longer there. you probably threw them somewhere.
fuck.
he’d chase you if he could, but you’re already long gone. his calls aren’t even going through—did you block him already? not even a goodbye note, nothing.
it’s useless, but he opens your chat thread anyway.
y/n, come back. i still want this.
but it reads undelivered.
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it’s a long shot. a very, very, slim chance.
sae tries to take it anyway.
a month later, the moment he touches down and puts his luggage back at home, he grabs his car keys and makes a break for your favourite hangout; a cosy family cafe at the edge of the city, near your workplace. he’s taken you there many times before on your request, and if there’s anywhere he’ll find you, he bets it’s there.
after a whole agonising month of trying and failing to talk to you, sae’s still going to try. fuck it if you reject him after that—at least he gets to say he tried.
he sits at the cafe from noon till evening, five hours of occupying the spot at the corner—your favourite one because you say it shades from the sun and it’s easy to wave the waiter over.
sae’s beginning to think that you’re not coming today, but then he sees a familiar figure strolling into the cafe. it’s not you, but it’s your best friend, suzuki, if he remembers correctly. suzuki, the one with the black hair and sharp blue eyes because the moment she walks in, she spots him in the corner, a knowing smirk on her face.
“what’re you doing here?” she asks, without a greeting first, because you probably told her what happened and she’s probably not very happy with him.
sae sighs, feeling stupid sitting here for five hours. although at least, she’s confirmation that you’ll be here soon.
“eating.” weak excuse, but whatever.
suzuki cocks a brow, “sure you’re not just a pathetic loverboy waiting for my best friend?”
is this embarrassment even worth it anymore?
before suzuki can say any more, sae hears a very familiar voice speaking his name, and there it is again—all the negativity seeped out of him in an instant.
“y/n, hey,” he greets, as though you haven’t been avoiding him this whole time.
on your part, you acknowledge him, which is way better than what he expected (you storming out and running away from him).
“what’re you doing here?”
sae wants to talk to you, but with suzuki’s eyes glued onto him, it kind of ruins the mood. still, this is the most you’ve spoken in two months and he’s not about to pass that up.
“i wanted to talk to you,” he says, keeping his voice down. “meet me after dinner?”
there is hesitance in your eyes, but your gazes meet again and for the first time since that night, sae is greeted with your genuine smile—“yeah, sure.”
just like that he’s taken back to three years ago when he first met you, when he first saw you smile at him and instantly knew that he had to have you, somehow. sae’s stupid to have hurt you however he did, he knows that now.
but now, selfish as it is, he can only hope that you haven’t moved on yet.
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sae puts your new address into his phone as you get into the car, fortunately agreeing to let sae drive you home.
“so, how’ve you been?”
it’s a stupid question to start with, and he hates himself for not getting to the point, but sue him; he’s still somehow afraid you’d shut him out straightaway if you knew what he really wanted to talk about.
your fingers rest awkwardly on your lap. sae can’t help but remember how they used to crawl over to the driver’s seat, resting on his thighs or teasingly curling his hair.
“i’m okay, finally left that job of mine.”
the one with the overbearing boss who micromanages way too much—yeah, sae remembers. he really wishes he’d treasured the little things more when he had them, like your small updates on your job and your family, or even the way you’d routinely text him everyday after work to see what he wanted for dinner.
“found a new one yet?”
you look out the window where you’d usually look at him. guess this is still awkward for you. “nope, but i’m working on it. i have a couple of interviews scheduled next week.”
“that’s nice,” sae responds, albeit half-heartedly because he’s never been good at conversations like these.
(on your end, you can’t help but realise how slow he’s driving even when there’s no other car in front of him. a part of your heart warms at the fact that maybe itoshi sae wants more time with you after all.)
“how about you? how was the match in london? heard you guys won by a huge margin.” (that’s a lie. you didn’t hear anything, you watched the match, stayed up late and all. nothing that sae needs to know.)
sae can tell you’re lying though, because you have that little habit where your ears twitch ever so slightly when you speak, and he chuckles softly. “it’s not a crime to watch my match, you know?”
your cheeks heat up—you really shouldn’t have asked anything at all. you whip your head towards him, sulking, “i didn’t watch it, okay?”
“sure, whatever you say,” sae tells you, feeling the tension lift off, feeling the normal you come back again. “how’s the new house?”
“it’s… okay. my roommate’s a little bit annoying but i can live with it.”
sae thought he could endure the small talk a little longer, but he can’t. not really. because the words just slip out of his mouth.
“then move back in with me.”
the car comes to a stop at a red light, and neither of you can look at each other. sae wonders if you’re just going to be impulsive and run out the door.
you don’t.
“it’ll be a little awkward living with an ex, don’t you think?”
“then all you have to do is get back with me,” sae answers, witty as you always remembered.
a moving car isn’t the best place to have this conversation, but if he doesn’t take the chance now, what if he loses it forever?
“i was stupid, okay? i don’t know why i didn’t say anything back then but the answer is yes, yes i do still want this- you.”
and it takes you aback slightly, because he’s never been one to be so vocal about his emotions. it kind of scares you a little too, how easily you fold when it comes to sae. it took everything in you to block his number that day, and everywhere else, and you’ve been hard at work trying to forget him, to the extent you’d agreed to room with some male even though you knew it was a bad idea.
but the moment you saw sae in that cafe, everything goes back to square one. and you’re kind of sick of lying to yourself—that the way you left didn’t leave a gaping hole in your heart, that the way you blocked him didn’t leave you chock full of regrets.
“maybe you should’ve said that before i left, then.” but you’re also stubborn, so there’s that.
sae pulls up outside of your new apartment complex right as the words leave your mouth, but his hand reaches out to grip your wrist after you unbuckle your seatbelt.
“i know i probably wasn’t a good boyfriend—” sae can’t bring himself to look at you as he speaks the words he thought would never leave his mouth— “but i promise i’ll work on it, ‘kay? just- don’t leave.”
again.
maybe in another life, you’re stronger than this. in that other life, maybe sae’s better at being expressive, better at reassuring you.
your eyes flick across the car to meet his, and he’s looking right at you, a sort of gaze that you’ve never really quite seen before—a mixture of both faith and fear. his grip on your wrist is firm, as if he’s afraid you didn’t believe him when he uttered those words.
“you make it very hard to stay broken up, you know that?” you’re pouting, hard, if only to try to keep yourself from smiling.
and the second you respond, the second he realises you didn’t reject him, his expression levels with that of a—how would you describe it, a golden retriever? as though he’s wagging his tail.
“so- you’re willing to give this a shot?”
you chew your inner cheek, “not so fast, hot shot. i’m not taking you back that easily.”
sae pulls back, cocking a brow, but he knows by the tone of your voice that his chance is at least granted. “what do you mean?”
you grin, “maybe i want you to chase me again, itoshi sae. can’t have you thinking i’m that easy to get, you know?”
your future boyfriend smirks, shaking his head. “you’re impossible, y/n l/n.” you hear nothing but fondness in his voice.
and just like the good boyfriend he envisions himself to be in the future, he walks you up to your doorstep, complete with giving a peck on your forehead when you arrive.
“how am i doing so far?”
“sae, it’s only been an entire elevator ride!” you laugh, sae pecking even more kisses onto your face. what makes this entirely more amusing is how he’s so straight-faced while doing it. “okay okay, i’ll rate you a six so far. you’re gonna have to do better on those dates you’ll ask me out on.”
he thinks you’re such a tease, but hey, he wouldn’t have you any other way.
when you open the door, you turn around to look at him, pressing your lips into a firm line before placing a quick kiss on his lips, making his heart skip two beats because he didn’t think you’d be so kind.
“see you soon, itoshi sae?”
sae nods, “yeah tomorrow.”
“someone’s eager,” you chuckle, though you agree to it. “see you tomorrow.”
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bonus: the next day
“itoshi sae, you’re too much.”
you’re lugging your suitcase behind you, sae carrying one of the heavier boxes. he keeps quiet, a sullen expression on his face.
“we could’ve at least waited for the movers to be available, you know?” you sigh as you get into the lift, sae pressing the topmost floor—back to the apartment you shared after a mere month of living on your own.
sae’s expression is now tilted towards you, and you don’t need him to speak to know what he’s thinking.
“do i really deserve the silent treatment for this?”
you’re not really arguing, but having a little disagreement. a small part of you is happy you get to do this with sae again, and not anyone else. that just means you two are that much closer, still.
“as if i’m gonna let you continue living there.”
you scoff, “what are you talking about? that apartment was completely fine!”
sae raises a brow, completely aware that you’re not actually back together but not being able to help himself nonetheless. because like hell is he ever allowing you to live there ever again.
“don’t fucking care, you’re not living with that michael fucking kaiser ever again.”
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cheolhub · 2 years ago
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YOU GET ME SO HIGH — VERNON CHWE ࿐
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summary. smoking with your best friend (who you totally don’t have a crush on) is super fun till all you can think about is him… well, doing him, to be more specific.
wc. 6.2k
warnings. recreational marijuana use!!, dubcon (kinda? sex while high), bf2l + idiots to lovers, kinda fluffy!! weed is referred to as ‘green crack’ several times lol, fingering, hehe big d!ck!vernon, mentions of masturbation, unprotected sex, pet names (baby), brief tit worship, naked confessions, vernon is kinda shy, jealous, nervous & rlly likes boobs and reader is v needy lol <3— MINORS DNI 18+
note. havent seen anyone write for vernon in like 3 years so here’s my lowkey cringey, poorly-written, self-indulgent fic that i was supposed to post for his birthday 2 months ago ++ guest appearance from weed dealer!cheol bc yeah :3
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if you had told vernon that his best friend was someone he’d met in a biology lab–one that he was accidentally put into his freshmen year– he’d say you were a liar. nonetheless, it’s true– you’re his best friend and you have been for years now. in your fourth and final year of university, you still sit on the balcony of your apartment with him like you have every other day for the past three.
“happy birthday, vernon,” you smile cheekily, passing him a snack-size ziplock baggie. “i got you an eighth since you’re always begging to smoke my shit.” 
he laughs and gives you a lazy smile, “Y/N, my birthday was over two months ago… plus, you know you didn’t have to get me anything.”
you scoff, rolling your eyes, “hansol vernon chwe, you are my best friend, of course i had to. and… i was waiting for a few of my checks to hit, that's why it’s a belated birthday gift.” you take his hand, placing the bag into it. “now take it and don’t smoke it all in a day, got it?”
he nods, eyes softening, “thank you,” he says. “must’ve cost your broke ass a fortune, though, so next time– don’t get me anything.”
you giggle at the joke that’s actually, not really a joke. “i really don’t think you have any room to speak– who here has a real job?” 
he rolls his eyes, “my job is real, thank you very much.”
you chuckle, shaking your head. “reselling limited edition vinyls for seven times what you bought them for isn’t a job, vernon, that’s called being a dick.” you tell him. “and actually, the prices weren’t too bad. cheol gave me a discount.”
vernon almost visibly clenches at the name of your awfully-sweet dealer. though he can attest, cheol is only ever sweet to you. every time he’s bought from your favorite supplier, he’s been a total asshole and upcharges him for no reason which is one of the basis’ why he’s always smoking your stuff. you always tell him it’s karma for selling records at such a high price, but vernon begs to differ. he knows that cheol just doesn’t like him and he has a gut feeling that it’s because of you. 
“oh yeah? how’d you get him to do that?” he asks, but he’s pretty sure he knows the answer. the answer being cheol has a thing for you.
you bite your lip, looking over your apartment balcony. “mmm, he showed up here while i was… you know…playing around…and…”
vernon knows you well enough to finish your sentence for you. “masturbating?”
“vernon, be modest!” you whine, hiding your face in your hands. “you knew, you didn’t have to say it!” 
he chuckles, “it’s normal, Y/N, we all do it. no need to be embarrassed over it.”
it’s true. everyone does it. but not everyone masturbates thinking about their best friend. he thinks that might just be him. 
“yeah, but you’ve probably never done it thinking you’d be finished before your hot drug dealer shows up at your apartment.” you blush. vernon doesn’t say anything for a while and you’re afraid you’ve made him feel uncomfortable (even though he claims you never have). you bite the insides of your cheeks before uttering, “can you pack a joint or something?”
truthfully, vernon doesn’t mean to be so quiet. he’s just trying to imagine you in that state without letting his dick get hard, though it’s proving to be extremely difficult. you probably looked so pretty in cute short shorts and a shirt that you could see your nipples through. or worse, you were wearing a tank top that was snuggly wrapped around your torso where you could see everything. he wants to be a gentleman, wants to be respectful… but, god, your tits are out of this world.
he hums trying to rid the dirty images in his head, taking your box of goods to grab the grinder and paper cones. “finish your story.” he urges.
you look at him, searching for signs of discomfort, but there is only that stoic look he always wore. with a sigh, you continue, “anyway, i was… you know… and he texted me and said he was here– i was a mess–”
he can imagine.
“–and i think he could tell ‘cuz when i got down to his car i was so disheveled and was about to start crying. i literally looked like i got edged or something,” you mumble, twiddling your thumbs out of embarrassment.
you’re painting a picture for vernon and he has to bite back a groan. 
it’s not the first time you and vernon had talked about sexual things. there had been several conversations on the topic. he knew almost everything about you except for… you know… what you tasted like and how tight you are– his vivid imagination couldn’t give him all of those pleasures. 
“and, vernon, i kid you not, he literally knew. he was all smug and shit,” you groan. “it was kinda humiliating.”
you remember how much wetter you’d gotten the moment you slipped into his car. he was calling you all types of things– all types of pretty pet names–and you’re genuinely surprised it didn’t escalate further because the sexual tension was heavy.
“and then i told him i wanted a quarter– an eighth for me and an eighth for you– and he told me he’d give me a special strain of sativa for half the normal price.”
vernon’s eyes widened, “half the price?”
“that’s what i said!” you exclaim. “pretty sure it’s because he could see my tits… i wasn’t wearing the best outfit …”
of-fucking-course he could see your tits. vernon holds back a groan, seeing as his suspicions about you in a tank top that night was right. instead, he chuckles airly. “now who needs to be modest.”
“stooop, just grind the weed.” you cry. 
vernon does as you ask, muttering, “maybe he laced it.”
“cheol wouldn’t, i’m pretty sure he just likes me.” you humbly reply, shooting daggers at your best friend for even suggesting that. “plus the strain was called ‘green crack’ or something like that… it was from the ‘st. patty’s day special.’”
“saint patrick’s day was like 4 weeks ago.”
“well then he was either trying to get rid of it or my tits must’ve made him feel generous.” you joke, giggling a bit at vernon’s poker face.
vernon is hiding it really well, but he’s filled with so much annoyance. your stupid dealer doesn’t deserve to see you like that. hell, vernon doesn’t even think he deserves to see you like that, but, fuck, he wants to. so badly. seeing you all hot and bothered with your tits on full display would be a dream come true. 
“would you fuck him for free weed?” he asks all of a sudden, making you blush furiously. he knows now that he doesn’t want to hear your answer when your mouth parts in shock. 
“vernon! what kinda girl do you take me for?” you put your hand over your chest as if it’s something you wouldn’t do. you break your facade when he gives you a knowing look, mouth cracking into a grin. “probably, i dunno. he’s kinda scary but i feel like he knows how to please a woman– i can’t say the same about a lot of other men.”
he internally rolls his eyes. cheol doesn’t know you the way he does. vernon could please you, he knows he can. 
he switches the subject back to the packed joint in his hands to keep from spiraling. “wanna spark it?”
you shake your head with a hum, “mmh-mmh, belated birthday boy gets the first few hits.”
he smiles, pulling the joint to his lips taking the lighter, igniting it with the pressure of his thumb. he lets the flame burn carefully through the paper, inhaling a large rush of smoke. he holds it in for a bit before he blows it out– away from your face– creating a white, potent-smelling cloud.
you reminisce while watching him. your balcony is like home to you and vernon. contrary to your neighbor's beliefs, smoking isn’t the only thing you do. you laugh and cry and talk for hours about people you hate and people you love. sometimes, you’ll do homework out here and when vernon is bored at his own place, he’ll come over to yours to keep you company. he provides a comforting presence and never-ending encouragement while reminding you to take breaks.
 it’s where you told him about your puppy crush on soonyoung from your statistics class and it’s where he told you about how he awkwardly lost his virginity to a girl during orientation week. it’s where the two of you are always together– it’s kinda like your place.
and watching him after all these years, you’ve never really realized how attractive your best friend was. well, that’s a lie. you’ve always thought vernon was likely one of the prettiest men to ever walk the earth, but if you truly admitted that, then you’d have to admit to the other things. things like how kind and considerate he is and how he’s boyfriend potential and how you totally don’t have any type of feelings for him whatsoever. it’s not a crush, you constantly have to remind yourself, it’s admiration for your best friend. there’s a difference.
but those admirable traits are things you can’t think about because he doesn’t see you that way. there’s no reason why you should see him that way if it’s not reciprocated. it only makes sense and prevents brutal rejection from the most perfect man on earth, aka your best friend. 
but your not-crush manifests itself sometimes. like when he smiles at you or when he randomly places his headphones over your head and tells you to “listen to this song” or when he spends the night in your bed because he’s too lazy to drive home. it gets harder and harder to hide every day. 
he passes the joint to you with an even lazier grin and you take it, parroting his actions. you let the smoke fill your lungs, hold it there, and exhale, shutting your eyes just as he did. 
and vernon thinks you look like a goddess. how could you make a simple action seem so attractive?
you take your hits, passing the joint back and forth till it suddenly hits you. all at once, you feel your body start to ache, your tummy flipping in anticipation, your mind fogging over leaving your entirety to buzz. you shift a bit and you feel your cunt dampen causing you to let out a sharp exhale.
“you good?” vernon asks, his deep voice filling your ears.
then you look at him. like… actually look at him. his face is a bit tired, his eyes red from the weed coursing his system, and his hair a bit disheveled from running his hand through it too much (this is why he wears the beanies)-- nevertheless, he looks fucking fantastic. 
your usual munchies are replaced with strong, burning sexual desire. just at the sight of your best friend, your pussy is soaking through your panties and your shorts.
“‘sol,” you murmur out the nickname. “do you feel… different?” you ask, eyes fluttering and lips parting.
you’re truly unaware of how seductive you look and how it’s slowly taking years off his life. vernon has been rock hard in his sweats for a solid 15 minutes now. and, yes, he feels extremely different. turned on to say the very least. 
“mmm, a little,” more like a lot. “maybe it’s the strain you got,” he mumbles, implying what he had said earlier was true.
it makes sense that cheol provided you with a strain that feels like you’re smoking a fucking aphrodisiac, but you’re starting to wish you were alone so you could at least do something about it. 
for a split second, you think you might be fine, then you’re hit with yet another wave of arousal, your core pulsing at the ideas that are incessantly popping into your head. ideas of him taking you right now, sitting on his face, sinking onto his cock– it’s too much. 
“vernon,” you say breathily and he freezes, pulling the joint away from his lips. “i… i think…”
you try to think about how to kick him out kindly so you can have some much-needed alone time, but you can’t– you can only think about having alone time with him. alone time that leads to shoving his hand down your pants. 
stop, you tell your hazy brain.
“Y/N, what’s wrong?” he asks, scooting closer to you. 
his scent floods your senses– a mix of weed and his cologne causing sensory overload in your poor brain and aching core. 
he’s internally worried that you’re greening out. though it doesn’t happen as much as it did when you first started smoking, there are rare occasions when you take more than you can handle. 
“c-can… you do me a favor?”
“‘course, anything.”
“vernon… it… i…need your help.” you whimper, leaning into him. “please…feels like ‘m gonna die.”
you’re being dramatic. 
he furrows his brows in confusion, panic becoming apparent on his features. “what hurts, Y/N? how can i help you?”
you take his hand in yours, slowly guiding him to the ache in your body. you gasp when his warm fingers come in contact with your clothed cunt. “here… it hurts here.” you exhale.
vernon has definitely lost it. his hand is between your thighs and your smaller one has moved to tightly wrap around his wrist. you’re a mess– he can feel it. he can feel the warmth radiating from your core, he can feel how you’ve soaked through your panties and how it’s seeped through the thin pair of shorts. he’s holding his breath and he fears he may pass out before getting a chance to touch you like you deserve. 
“y-you’re not in your right mind, Y/N,” he whispers, afraid his voice may betray him. “you smoked too–”
“uh-uh, it’s okay– vernon, it’s okay, i want you… please,” you whimper, grip around his wrist tightening as you buck your hips slightly for more friction. 
you want him. you… want him. 
“but–”
you’re growing frustrated, “if you won’t… then i-i think you should go ‘cuz i need… i need to be alone.”
vernon takes this as an implication that you need to fuck yourself if he won’t fuck you and he’ll be damned if he’s not the one making you see stars. 
so, he asks one more time, “Y/N… are you sure?”
“yes… yes, ‘m sure. ‘m so sure, please, ‘sol,” you beg, using the nickname that makes him fold every time. 
he doesn’t hold back, putting out the joint in his hand and leaving it in the ashtray. his now-free hand cups your cheek, pulling you in for a kiss. you moan, eagerly allowing his tongue to slip into your mouth as your hands needily fist at his shirt. 
despite having smoked, vernon’s lips are soft. softer than the lips of men you’ve kissed before. and he still tastes good even with the pungent lemony flavor lingering on his tongue– overwhelmingly good. it seems that he’s just as eager and turned on as you are, too, nearly devouring you whole. you can’t help but fall in love with the heated, now-sloppy kiss.
and vernon truly feels like he’s died and gone to heaven. he’s not sure if this is even real or if the weed has him hallucinating… it wouldn’t be the first time, but you biting down on his bottom lip has him coming back to earth and lets him know that you’re real. that you are very much real and very much grinding on his fingers desperately. 
“vernon,” you pant, pulling him closer by the shirt in your grip. “please, more— feels good, but i need more.” your hazy eyes look into his and you see how they’ve darkened.
“fuck, Y/N,” he groans and his voice has you clenching around nothing. “we need to go inside…”
you’re both sure that this might ruin your relationship, but you decide it’ll be a problem for tomorrow. right now, all either of you can think about is getting off on each other. 
that’s why you’re quick to stand on your feet, holding out your hand for him to take. when he stands, grunting, you pull him into your apartment and leave all of your goods on the balcony without a second thought. 
you drag him to your room before attacking him with another kiss and pulling at the ends of his shirt. you’re a bit disoriented, swaying and stumbling over your steps, but when your legs hit the bed and you nearly fall, vernon’s quick to catch you by the waist. 
“careful,” he murmurs, gently laying you on the plush mattress. you scoot to the head of the bed, laying on your back as you wait for him. 
he takes your expectant face as a sign to remove his clothing and he does so quickly, knowing how impatient you are at this very moment. his shirt comes off and then his sweats, leaving him in boxers where his bulge becomes… apparent.
you have to hold your breath at the dizzying sight of his naked torso and the massive tent in his underwear.
you make grabby hands at him, urging him to come take care of you on the bed. he obliges, getting on your bed, hovering over you while his own head spins. he’s truly unsure if this is actually his real life or if he’s having a dream sent from the gods above. 
he decides not to wait any longer, taking control of the situation by placing his lips on your heated neck. his lips trail down, leaving sloppy, wet kisses on your skin, reveling in how you desperately whimper for him though he’s barely doing anything. 
his hands reach for the hem of your loose top– one that might actually be his– pushing it up and tugging it over your head and arms, leaving your chest bare before him. he groans before diving to your tits, wrapping his lips around one of your nipples, sucking and tugging at the bud hungrily. 
you gasp at the sight. you’ve never seen vernon so eager to do anything in the time you’ve known him and now he’s making out with your tits as if it were his last day on earth. 
that’s hot, you think to yourself. so hot– you’re so fucking hot right now.
you can’t see it, but you feel his hand come down to your sleep shorts, digging in past the elastic band of both the satin fabric and your cotton undies. his fingers dip into your lips, running them through your soaked folds. 
“you’re so wet.” he hisses. 
you whine at the contact, apologizing softly, “‘m sorry– can’t help it.” 
his fingers find your hole, circling it before easing two of them inside. “don’t apologize, baby. it’s really hot.” he whispers, the pet name slipping past his lips without completely registering. 
you clench and moan at the domestic name. “fuck, ‘sol,” you whimper. “a-again… call me that again…”
his face burns, whispering out, “you like when i call you ‘baby?’” 
knowing vernon, it was meant to sound like a genuine question, but being in the state you’re in, it sounds so seductive… so enticing that it has your back arching. you nod your head, an even darker blush falling over your already-red cheeks. 
you let out a clipped, “yes.” and he just moans, thrusting his fingers in and out faster, digits stretching your tight, gummy walls out to prepare you for his cock. 
he wonders how you could be so tight because, holy fuck, you’re squeezing around his fingers like you’re trying to trap them in there. 
you whine softly, “vernon, please give me more…”
he definitely just fucking died. 
his cock twitches uncontrollably in his boxers, begging to be set free, but he decides to give you another finger instead. vernon knows he’s… a bit on the bigger side, and judging by how you feel right now, there’s absolutely no way he’ll easily fit inside of you. the last thing he wants to do is hurt you. 
so he slowly pulls his hand out of your shorts and helps you out of them. he throws them to the side and has you spread open. he huffs at the sight before taking three of his fingers back to your hole. he pushes them in gently, groaning at the tighter fit. your moans are bouncing off the walls and vernon looks up to see your mouth hung open with your head thrown back against your pillow. 
he checks on you, throat dry at the sound, sight, and feeling of you. “i-is… are you doing okay?” and when you just whine, he bites the inside of his cheek anxiously. he remembers your fondness for the pet names from a few minutes prior, so he tries again. “baby… does it feel good?”
and he’s not sure what to expect, but when your body jolts and your hand's fist at the sheets, you get even tighter, clenching around his fingers desperately. you really do have an affinity for being called ‘baby.’ 
your brain is jumbled, intoxicated from the weed and his fat fingers stretching your cunt open. “‘m okay… f-feels so good.” you tell him breathily with a whine bubbling in the back of your throat at the feeling of his fingers pushing further into you. “fuck, vernon– it’s so good.”
and it’s true, you don’t think you’ve ever experienced pleasure this intense before, but you remember your senses are heightened by 10 because of the drug. that ‘green crack’ is insane.
he moans at the confirmation, curling his fingers up and fucking your messy cunt, the palm of his hand bumping against your clit with every thrust. he feels a rush of your honeyed arousal soaking his fingers and he swears he might cum before he can even get his cock in you. 
you gasp loudly when you feel his pace quicken, eyes squeezing shut. an array of mewls and high-pitched whines shamelessly slip past your lips. “oh! fuck, i’m close, i’m so close, vernon.” you warn, wet walls clamping around his curled fingers.
he exhales sharply, voice low when he urges you, “cum for me, baby.”
his voice and harsh thrusts are more than enough to throw you over the edge, stomach knots unraveling. you gush all over his big fingers, pussy pulsing as it’s doing its best to push his digits out, but he continues his ministrations to work you through your blinding orgasm.
feeling you cum may have been the best thing life has offered him. 
“fuck, that’s it– are you okay? did that feel good?” he asks breathily, pulling out his fingers, a string of arousal connected to your hole following them out. he bites his lip at the sight, keeping a moan bottled up. he wants to taste you so bad… and the cum on his fingers taunt him. 
you nod your head, still panting, “w-was so good, y-you’re really good… don’t usually cum that fast…”
“really?”
you shake your head, “t-told you that guys don’t really know what they’re doing most of the time.”
he shakes his head in disapproval, “well… you deserve the best.” 
“... like you?” your heart races and the weed from earlier still lingers like a cloud over your brain. you look at him, the soft light from the moon illuminating his flawless skin. your eyes trail down his torso, eyes landing on the big bulge in his boxers again. 
he chokes, masking the sound with a nervous chuckle, “me? i-i’m not…no.” your eyes widen, realizing you’ve completely misread him, feeling panic flood your body. you quickly shut your legs, arms coming to cover your bare chest. 
he’s quick to notice that you’re starting to spiral, though, so he re-registers what you said and then what he said and his eyes widen, too. his words come out rushed as he attempts to do damage control. “no! not no, as in i don’t see you in that way, but no because you deserve the best and…”
“but… you are the best, ‘sol…” you tell him softly, hugging yourself tighter. “and before you say anything, the weed is wearing off– think you finger-fucked it out of me,” you joke to lighten the mood, but when you see he’s still frozen, you internally cringe at yourself, continuing. “i’m being serious. i’m in my right mind and i’m telling you that you’re the best because you are. you always have been.”
he shudders nervously, “Y/N… don’t.”
you frown at him, turning your head away to look at your window instead, mentally face-palming yourself. “did i make it awkward again?” you ask nervously. you don’t even wait for his response, continuing your anxious ramble. “can you just forget i said anything? and that i made you do this? i…i don’t wanna lose you– i never want to lose you.” you whisper. “you’re my best friend.”
he shakes his head incessantly as if he’s trying to tell you something with the simple action, but you aren’t even looking at him, so he takes a deep, shaky breath. “no, you didn’t make me do anything. i just mean don’t say things like that if you don’t really like me because i…” he trails off and you turn back to look at him, concerned by his sudden halt. “Y/N, i… like you. so much. i have for forever now, but you were always talking about soonyoung or cheol and then there was that whole thing with that pretentious art kid– minghao, i think– i dunno.”
what!?
you look at him incredulously, eyes wide and lips parted in genuine shock, “why didn’t you tell me…?”
he sighed, hands coming to rest on your thighs. “it seemed like i never really had a chance… you’re my best friend, too… and i didn’t want to lose you either.”
you sit up, exclaiming, “but you’ve liked me this entire time and i didn’t even know?!”
he gives you a small grin and a shrug, “what can i say? i’m discreet.”
you scoff, sitting in silence for a few seconds before opening your mouth again. with your voice meek, you say.“i wish you would’ve told me.” you inhale sharply, continuing to hug yourself tightly. “i like you, too, you know… i just didn’t think you liked me back so i tried to not like you– which is really hard, by the way, because you’re annoyingly pretty.”
“sorry, i’ll try to stop being so pretty.”
you playfully slap his bare chest, “i actually hate you so much.”
he jokingly sulks, placing a hand over where you hit him. “aw, baby, you just said you liked me.”
you shudder, body naturally leaning into him as your mind gravitates back to your not-so-innocent thoughts. “i do… and i’d like you a little more if you kept calling me that.”
his breath hitches as you get closer and closer, “yeah?”
“mhm…”
he whispers against your lips, a cheeky smile on his, “you’re such a baby.”
“you’re so mean,” you hum, letting your lips graze his. “am i not your baby?”
he rests his forehead against yours and looks into your eyes for any sign of playfulness. you seem to be serious so he asks, “is that what you want?” he’s nervous you can hear the way his heart is about to pound out of his chest. 
“duh… idiot.”
“okay, cool.” he says nonchalantly even though he’s internally freaking out. “you’re my baby.”
your heart skips a beat and your cunt dampens again at the title, “okay, cool.” you parrot casually as if your heart wasn’t about to lurch out of your chest. “you can… kiss me. if you want…”
vernon utters a soft ‘right’ before finally closing the gap between the two of you. his lips mold to yours and you know for a fact that there is no one else on earth you’d want to kiss. his big hand comes to cup your cheek and you melt under the touch, mouth opening for him to slip his tongue into. 
naturally, the kiss heats up and before long, you’re whining into his mouth, hand blindly reaching for his clothed cock. he groans the second you find the aching hard-on, nimble hands stroking him through his boxers. 
“Y/N,” he pants breathily in between kisses. “are you… sure you wanna… do this?”
you think it’s sweet that he keeps checking on you, and sure, you’re still a bit fuzzy from the after-effects of the ‘green crack’, but you need him to give you what you want. so you nod, breaking from the kiss to lay back in your original position under him. 
“please fuck me, baby,” you beg in the most sultry voice you can conjure up. when he stays frozen, you pout. “hansol, please.”
he curses, quickly getting his boxers off and revealing the prettiest dick you’ve ever seen. precum beads at the slit of his flushed tip and prominent veins run through the length. he’s so big, surely enough to have you see stars. you’re starting to feel grateful that he prepped you because his dick would have completely ruined you without it.
“‘s big.” you simply state, bottom lip finding sanctum in between your teeth as you gawk at it. 
“you think so?” he gives you a wobbly smile, stomach-churning at the subtle praise. he moves in between your thighs and spreads you out for him. “is it okay?”
you blush, nodding your head, “mhm, don’t worry,” you tell him. “i’ll let you know if i need you to stop.” 
he nods, huffing softly, “do you have any condoms?”
you chuckle breathily. “not for your size… but it’s okay, i’m clean and safe. you don’t need one. you can pull out if it makes you feel better.”
his throat runs dry– fuck, fuck, fuck. he’s fucking you raw?! how the hell is he supposed to last hitting it raw?! you were already tight around three of his fingers and he can’t even imagine how you’d feel wrapped around his cock.
he realizes he hasn’t replied in a few seconds when you say his name softly. he sees you growing restless under him and he apologizes and nods again dumbly. 
he runs his tip through your folds, moaning when he finds you’re just as wet as you were earlier. he aligns himself with your leaky hole, slowly pushing himself inside of you with a groan to find that you’re still so fucking tight.
you’ve found that, despite vernon’s laid-back and chill personality, he’s quite loud in bed. he’s nothing like you expected and you’re pleasantly surprised. 
when his cock slides in between your tight walls, the both of you are instantly a mess, panting and moaning in pleasure. your walls envelop him so snugly that you fear the thick veins that adorn his length will imprint into them.
“fuck, vernon.” you moan, praying the burn in your pussy melts to pleasure soon so he can fuck you the way you want it. the way you need it. . “your cock.”  
he hisses, pushing in past the resistance. “you feel so good, baby, oh my god.” he grunts, head falling back at the way you hug him. “god, i’ve wanted this for so long– wanted you for so long.”
you cry, clenching around his girth because, god, you’ve wanted him, too.
when he finally bottoms out, you both pause to take erratic breaths, positively going feral over each other. he attempts to recollect himself and check up on you again. “are you–”
you don’t even let him finish, nodding your head vigorously. “yes, vernon, just need you to move, please.” you plead. “need you to fuck me– please, need it so fucking bad.”
you’re so needy for him and he knows it’s because of the last bit of weed that looms, but he can’t help but wonder if you’re like this on a normal day. if you’re always begging for a cock to fill you up. not that it would matter– he’d do anything you asked of him. you’re so fucking pretty to him and his brain is constantly yelling at him to cater to every single one of your wishes. the chokehold you have him in is so tight. 
tight like your pretty cunt that’s now gracefully swallowing his cock with every thrust of his hips. your room is full of panting, moans, and the lewd squelch of your wet pussy taking him. it sounds better than any song he’s ever heard and, if he’s being completely transparent, he hopes to experience this for the rest of his life.
vernon unexpectedly comes down, craning his neck to latch his mouth around your nipples again, stimulating you there, too. you’re sure the position is a bit straining, but he doesn’t seem to mind as he moans loudly into your chest. his hand plays with the other nipple, switching every minute to give both of them love and attention all while his cock steadily rams in and out of you. 
your hands tangle in his hair, smothering his face into your tits while he moans and whines some more into them. 
and when he adjusts slightly and his tip hits that spot, the one that makes you crumble in seconds, a sob wracks through your entire body.
“there! shit, baby, right there, please.” you gasp, back arching into him. 
vernon asks breathily, removing his face from the comfortable spot on your chest, “there? that’s it?” 
and you nod, chest rising and falling at a rapid pace as you feel the pressure build-up at the bottom of your tummy. he continues to hit the spongy spot inside of you, bringing you closer and closer. 
his own face is pinched and he can’t stop the soft whines that come out of his mouth. you just feel fucking amazing. 
“a-are you close? i’m not gonna last long.” he pants out. 
and you weakly sob out a reply of ‘yes,’ hand moving to toy with your swollen clit. the action immediately has the tightrope inside of you coming undone for the second time in the night. you mewl out his name, clamping around him tightly and coating his cock in slick cum. 
it’s like a chain reaction that has vernon cursing and pulling his dick out of you. he eagerly fists at his cock, jerking himself off till he releases all over your puffy pussy. he’s moaning softly, prettily calling out your name. his heart pounds rapidly and his entire body twitches at the feeling of release. 
his eyes finally open after a few seconds of trying to regulate his breathing. he sees the way your cunt is dressed in white and how you're slowly, but surely, coming down from both of your highs. 
“hey,” he whispers. 
“hi,” you mumble, eyes fluttering open. your hands reach for him and he can’t help but find you so cute. “c’mere.”
he smiles, leaning down to kiss you again. unlike your past few kisses, it’s soft and innocent. loving. he parts after a minute or so, hand moving to sweep the hair out of your face. 
“are you sure you’re alright?” he whispers. “i feel kinda bad…”
“don’t, ‘sol, i wanted it. i’m really happy.” you tell him sincerely. “are you alright?”
he sighs, “i’m really happy, too… i just wish i would’ve taken you out on a date or something before… fucking you.” 
you shake your head, “we did it kinda backwards, but, seriously, i’m just happy you’re here… happy that you’re mine.” he blushes, moving to hide his face in your neck while you giggle. “if you wanna, we can go on a date now?”
“where?” he mumbles into your neck.
“7/11– channie’s working so that means free big gulps and rollers… you know, since some of us can’t afford to eat real food because of their ‘job.’”
vernon scoffs, pulling his face out of your neck and giving you a stern look. “dude, it’s a real job–”
you laugh, effectively cutting him off. “okay, scammer– if it’s a real job, why are you always stealing my fucking weed instead of buying your own?” 
“because weed is scarce these days and your bitch ass dealer hates me– why should i have to pay $20 for a gram when you only pay $5?” he nearly cries. “and, since we’re on the topic, i don’t like him. he’s too friendly with you.” that’s code for “he obviously wants to fuck you.”
“you’re jealous of cheol!”
he groans, rolling his eyes, a tiny pout appearing on his face, “so what if i am?”
you coo, “aw, baby,” hand coming to cup his blushy cheek. “you don’t have to worry about him,” you relay to him, voice laced with sincerity. “you’re the only one i want.”
he goes a little bug-eyed at your words before clearing his throat and nodding. “good. that’s good.” 
you raise an eyebrow, “just good?” 
“no… it’s great…” he mumbles cutely. “you’re also the only one i want.”
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© cheolhub — all rights reserved, please refrain from copying, reposting, modifying or translating my work on any platform.
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ladytauria · 1 month ago
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@ragnarokhound asked: 🎃👻 Trick or treat!! 🍫🍬🍭
hehe hi fenris!!
you may have seen me answer this & then found it deleted—i accidentally clicked post while clearing away a notification. the joys of mobile Tumblr, lmao.
anyway!
for you... i am going to talk about my selkieljason wip! (as a warning, this is basically a summary of every detail i have for this fic so… if you don’t want spoilers for a hypothetical story that may never end up fully written, don’t click!)
it's a #+1 fic—i havent decided if it's going to be 3, 4, or 5 haha. the summary is:
X times Tim could have stolen Jason's coat but didn't, and 1 time Jason wrapped him in it.
It's an urban fantasy AU where non-humans are known about but either a) not common or b) still don't really show their faces much. There are a lot of stereotypes & untrue beliefs about the various non-humans, as well as conflicting myths & such. Most of them prefer not to deal with having to educate humans and either live among them secretly or have their own separate communities—or both.
Jason is a selkie, of course; Gotham has a small selkie community but they prefer to stay relatively secretive. Still, there’s a common phrase you hear among the folk of Gotham:
“You want an obedient spouse? Catch yourself a selkie wife.”
As such, Jason keeps his true nature tucked tight to his chest. He also can’t bear to be parted with his coat. It NEEDS to be within his sight at all times—nowhere else is safe enough. Luckily for him, the magic of a selkie’s pelt allows it to change forms as he wants/needs it to. It’s been a red hoodie, a school blazer, a yellow cape, and most recently, a brown leather jacket.
The bats are all aware that Jason is a selkie. Jason trusted Bruce enough to tell him after about six months to a year of living with him, and that knowledge spread to Alfred and Dick and later to Tim and Damian. (In this AU, the Robin uniform in Bruce’s case has no cape.)
I am picturing this happening while Tim and Jason are tentatively something. They start out as fwb with feelings. Both of them knowing the other has feelings but less sure of their own, if they can really be the person the other wants or needs.
There is also still definitely some friction between them. Since it’s Jason’s POV a lot of that friction is focused on whether or not Tim can live with the way he handles his cases as well as his distance from the other bats. But there’s also likely some concerns about whether or not Jason can live with Tim’s quirks, haha.
Anyway. Outside of their relationship they also work together a lot, because they genuinely do work very well as a team. They compensate for each other’s weaknesses and boost each other’s strengths—and these days, there’s a mutual respect, now that Tim is better at understanding Jason.
But they still have issues there, too.
Each of the five incidents involve them fighting or disagreeing. I also want to show them steadily taking steps in their relationship, as well; growing from fwb to more of a couple haha. But each of therese incidents/cicrcumstances involve Tim handling Jason’s coat while he’s vulnerable.
Each time, Jason wakes up fearing that Tim will have taken his coat and hidden it. Tim may not want a selkie groom—he can think of a lot of bad things about Tim, but never that he would coerce Jason into any kind of relationship—but that doesn’t mean he doesn’t want Jason’s obedience. His cooperation.
Each time, though, Jason’s coat is either safe in his sight or touching him.
The last incident is definitely the worst and the one Jason thinks that Tim will break up with him over, even if he doesn’t take the coat, but instead—
Instead he doesn’t.
It cements Jason’s trust in Tim. That he can trust him not to take advantage of what he is no matter how bad their fights get or how angry Tim is with him. And he wants to show Tim that. That he knows it, that he loves him, so—
He does it the only way he knows how:
He wraps Tim in his coat and kisses him.
Which brings us to the only proper scene I have written for this fic:
Jason runs his thumb over his coat, the leather of its disguise buttery soft, and watches Tim. He’s utterly at ease on Jason’s couch, scrolling through his phone, one arm dangling off the armrest. Jason swallows, stomach twisting with nerves. He takes a breath—in through the nose, out through the mouth. Then, he strides forward, clenching his coat a bit tighter.
He kneels in front of Tim, capturing his attention. His phone falls to the side as Tim’s brows furrow. Before he can ask what Jason is doing, Jason unfurls his coat, wrapping it around Tim’s shoulders.
His eyes grow wide. “Ja— wh—“
Jason can feel the heat on his face. Knows he has to be pink, at the very least. But he doesn’t stop, tugging Tim forward and into the briefest, chastest kiss before resting their foreheads together.
“Caught you,” he murmurs.
The smile he receives is the most beautiful thing he’s ever seen.
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ihrtnemi · 5 months ago
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My Love For You
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In where the the newest Flame Hashira is inlove with the Wind Pillar CW: Confession - Fluff - Meanbutkind!Sanemi - Insults - f!reader - Sanemixreader WC: 1779 Header - https://ph.pinterest.com/pin/582090320610795897/ This is the first thing i have ever written and I tried my best in writing it! i hope you guys will enjoy it and its a bit unoriginal since there have probably been multiple works that are in the same genre. I also havent fully proofread the story so sorry for any mistakes :(
DO NOT REPOST/REBLOGS ARE APPRECIATED
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“Caw! Caw! (L/N)! (L/N)! You have received a letter” your kasugai crow shouted as you opened the window for it to enter.
“Huh? What's this about?” you said as you reached for the letter.
The letter was nicely stored in an envelope which smelled like fresh wisteria. As you looked at the letter further, you realized that it had the Ubuyashiki crest, signalizing that the letter had important value. 
“It must be another mission, I hope I'm paired with Mitsuri this time!” you said as you opened the letter. “Oh! Oh! Maybe even Sanemi! I sure hope I'm paired with him.” you murmured as you finally saw the letters' contents. 
You were Kyojuro’s little sister and just like him, you were known to be enthusiastic and kind-hearted. When your older brother died, you took in the responsibility of being the next flame pillar. You were a contrast to Sanemi Shinazugawa’s interior and exterior, you looked like a sweet person and you were. While Sanemi looked scary and also had an aggressive personality. So when people found out that you had a massive crush on him, everyone was caught in disbelief. After all, who would like someone as rude as him?
You didn't know why you liked him to be honest, you didn't deny that he didn't need character development but you also couldn't deny that he didn't look good. He looked handsome and he had an insanely good build. He was also very skilled in his work which made you admire him.
As you read the letter, you were notified that there have been many young males that went missing in a nearby village down north. It was suspected that a Kizuki was residing in the village but whether it was an upper moon or a lower moon the master was unsure. However, contrary to the bad news, you soon discovered that you have indeed been paired on a joint mission with the Wind Pillar. 
“Oh my gosh! I'm going on a mission with Sanemi?!” you shouted. “Me going on a mission with Sanemi, Alone?” you put emphasis in.
You excitedly screamed as you repeated the news in your head for the nth time. As your mind wandered, you decided to cook Ohagi for Sanemi. You noticed that he always carried the faint smell of Ohagi with him. After some time, you finally finished making the food and noticed that it was almost time to go out on the mission. So, you made sure to look extra pretty by adding a bow at the back of your head and a pair of earrings that you had recently bought. You noticed that your lips felt chapped and decided to use lip balm and a bit of lip tint to make sure that your face didn't look too sickly, not that you were of course. 
You took your katana together with the Ohagi and ran towards the meeting place. As you stepped into the Wind Pillar’s yard you didn't find anything except for a few wooden swords on the ground. You looked around once more feeling confused as to where Sanemi was but to no avail, he wasn't there. You told your crow to try and find the Wind Pillar’s crow but as you were about to say it, you heard leaves crunching. You turned to look at where the noises came from and saw him walking towards you.
With the biggest smile on your face you said, “Sanemi! You're here! I was wondering when you would come.”
Instead of greeting you with the same energy, he spoke with coldness and said, “It's Shinazugawa to you.” 
You felt hurt because even after trying to be friends with him for months, he was still as cold to you as it started. Still, you brushed off those feelings and smiled at him again, “Sorry! here, have this as a sorry” shoving the decorated box you had in your hands into his face. 
He looked at you confused, “What the hell is this?” he muttered.
“Ohagi! You smelled like it so I figured that you must have liked it,” you said happily, “And I made it myself! Go on, try it” You looked at him expectantly. 
“No way this is disgusting, why would I eat this?” he walked towards his house leaving you behind. 
You catched up to him and said, “Where are you going?”
“To feed this garbage to my dog, actually he doesn't even deserve to eat this. Maybe I'll give it to Iguro.” he spat.
“Oh,” feeling sad, you said, “Okay, i'll just wait for you at the gate” as you walked towards the gate, walking further away from Sanemi. 
Sanemi turned to look at you and felt a twinge of hurt in his heart, he was scared of the possibility that he actually hurt your feelings but soon brushed it aside as he went to his kitchen counter and placed the food that you made on top for him to eat later. Afterwards, he went outside to meet you. 
You turned around and saw him, “Ready to go?” you said smiling. 
“Yeah, let's go,” he said as he waited for you.
You both ran towards the village, not speaking to each other. Usually you would make conversation but you felt a bit conflicted because of what he said earlier at his house, so you decided to just not talk unless needed. Sanemi noticed that you weren't talking, he wanted to say something but he was too shy and he didn't want to damage his pride. So the entire journey there was dead silent. 
You guys arrived and sat on a rooftop that had an overview of the entire village, it was still daylight so both of you had the time to investigate. By that time, you had cheered up and decided to try and fulfill your fantasies of you and Sanemi ending up together. Your thoughts were cut off when Sanemi put his hand on your shoulder. 
“(L/N),” he said quietly, you turned around in order to face him, “Yes Shinazugawa?” you looked at him confused. 
“Sorry,” he then looked into your eyes. “For what?” you said as you smiled and looked at him. 
“You know what I mean,” he continued, “I'll eat the stupid ohagi that you made.” He then looked at everything besides you. 
“Awww, Shinazugawa! Just say that you want to eat it!” you teased him.
“No I don't! What the hell are you thinking?'' he turned around, “Let's just continue the stupid mission” he said with a tint of embarrasment. 
After that fateful day, you and Sanemi started getting closer. He was still mean to you but it wasn't as bad as before. Your feelings started to grow more and you found yourself being more open about your feelings towards him. Despite that, Shinazugawa kept ignoring your love for him. 
“Hey Sanemi, can I ask you a question?” you asked. “What?” he looked at you.
“What if I told you, right here and right now, that I'm in love with you?” you said excitedly. 
“I would kill you.” he turned around in order to hide the flush forming on his face. 
“But Sanemi!” you whined, “Why would you kill me?” you pressed on.
“Because you're an idiot” he started walking away from you. 
Sanemi accepted that he also had feelings towards you, he loved you. Yet, with the duties of being a hashira, he couldn't indulge in such luxuries just yet. He had a mission to fulfill, he couldn't fulfill his wishes just yet
Sighing, you finally said, “Okay, i'll go now, I have a mission soon with Muichiro, i'll see you later” you then turned around to leave but heard him speak. 
“Stay safe and come back in one piece” that was all you needed to motivate you. 
A few days have passed and you still haven't returned home. Sanemi was starting to get worried about you and your whereabouts but he set a focused mind. That was until he overheard a few kakushi talking about you. 
A male kakushi whispered, “Oi, did you know that Lady (L/N) and Sir Tokito encountered an uppermoon?”. “Well did they survive?” the female kakushi asked, “Yeah, however Lady (L/N) arrived in critical condition while Sir Tokito arrived with a few cuts, the uppermoon also got away.” said by the male kakushi. 
With that Sanemi felt his heart race, he bolted towards the butterfly estate to see you. When he arrived he saw you. You had your entire abdomen bandaged up, with multiple cuts on your body. Luckily with your hashira trained body, you were able to wake up from your coma not even a few days after the fight. There you were eating food and talking to Muichiro who seemed to be deeply thanking you for taking the almost fatal hit for him. 
Sanemi rushed to your side and shouted at you, “(Y/N), what the hell happened!?” He looked scared. “How many days have you been here?” he said worriedly. 
Muichiro then excused himself because it seemed as if there was something to be discussed between the both of you. 
“Sanemi! You're here!” you smiled at him, “I've been here for 5 days”. 
“Why was I not notified straight away?” he questioned, “Didn't I tell you to teach your crow to tell me if something bad happens to you?” he said angrily. 
“Uhm,” you awkwardly muttered, “I kinda just told my bird not to tell you unless I actually died..” you trailed off. 
“What?” he asked in disbelief, “Are you stupid?” he asked you seriously. 
Out of nowhere you suddenly spoke, “I love you,” your impulsive thoughts getting the better of you. 
The way he came running towards you after finding out that you almost died just made your heart melt and you just wanted to marry him right there. 
Sanemi blushed at your statement. He pondered on the thought, what if you actually died? He realized that he should just admit his feelings for you since he didn't know if both of you would come out alive after everything. 
He cupped your cheeks and said, “I love you too idiot, don't scare me like that ever again.”
You were shocked to say the least, did he just admit his feelings for you? You then asked him. 
“Say that again?” you looked at him. “I love you,” he said shyly, “So much.” 
You were mentally screaming and the first thing that came out of your mouth was, “I knew that you loved me back!” you said happily. 
“Come on! Say it again! Please?” you whined, “No” was all he said. 
The end
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Authors Note: this was honestly kinda rushed i feel like the pacing is a bit too fast
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limabean42 · 4 months ago
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can i get some relationship hcs for sadness and/or disgust please? i havent seen anyone make anything for them yet and i love them both dearly. thanks. big fan of your work so far btw!
Sadness and Disgust relationship headcanons
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Yeee I’m excited! This is my first request with more than one character included! You guys can always request headcanons for more than one character. Just keep in mind though that because multiple characters are being written for each character’s headcanons will be shorter compared to if it was just one character! Hope you enjoy! Also if you requested recently your request probably won’t be filled until a couple weeks from now. I have a lot to go through and I try to write every other day :)
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Sadness
• Sadness would’ve never thought she’d be in a relationship
• She honestly felt like she wasn’t worthy of being loved by anyone
• If she liked you a lot and couldn’t shake the feeling she’d confess to you but would anticipate rejection
• If you confessed first she’d be genuinely surprised
• “Really? You like me?” She would say
• Nonetheless you two would start dating
• Sadness would be a timid lover at first
• She wouldn’t be adventurous or make the first move at anything just in case you weren’t into it
• However, if you are the type to make the first move and do, she would gain courage to do so as well
• Gets shy with PDA but still accepts it
• If you’re not physically near each other in the control room she waves at you from across the room a lot
• You think it’s cute
• You go on mini dates around headquarters and read books together
• Gets shy when you two kiss
• Likes cuddling with you
• Prefers if you’re the big spoon because she likes to feel protected
• Once you two have been dating for a while she says I love you regularly
• Probably wouldn’t say it first though
• She gets tired easily and when she does she drags you to the bed to come cuddle with her
• You comfort her whenever she cries, even if it’s over trivial things like Riley dropping an ice cream cone
• If she’s crying about something more serious you hold her tighter and give her kisses on the head to help her get through it and talk about it
• She sometimes gets insecure and in her head about you being too good for her
• You can tell when she does because her mood change is easy to detect
• You always comfort and reassure her
• You two don’t really argue
•If she’s upset at you she’s usually sad, hardly ever gets mad or starts arguments
• Just starts crying
• This can be an issue for you sometimes but that’s a topic for another day
• Her primary love languages are words of affirmation and quality time
• Often needs verbal reassurance from you but also loves to be near you in general. Spending time together while chatting
• Overall a very sweet and laidback girlfriend
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Disgust
• Disgust was surprised when she discovered that she had romantic feelings for someone other than Lance to be honest
• She was a bit grossed out at first
• Cause like, why would she all of a sudden develop a crush on someone she lived with?
• She was in denial for a while, whenever she thought of being in a relationship with you she’d almost barf at the idea of her not hating it
• Eventually she would be forced to come to terms with these feelings
• She wouldn’t confess though, you’d have to do that part
• When you do she considers it for a few minutes then sighs defeatedly, admitting the feelings are mutual
• “Fine, whatever. We can date but if you do anything weird I’m breaking up with you.” She’d say in her usual sassy tone
• She’s hesitant at first to do coupley stuff with you. Cringes internally at it
• Eventually though, she more than warms up to it
• She starts craving physical touch and compliments from you
• Falls in love with you without realizing it
• The more time she spends with you the stronger her feelings grow
• She rarely ever gets grossed out by anything you do, just admires you all day from afar
•Doesn’t say anything about it though unless she’s feeling romantic
• Very protective over you
• Will always make sure you’re safe
• If anyone tries to cross you she’s always on your side backing you up, no matter if you’re right or wrong
• She completely turns into your number one fan
• Starts complimenting you on your appearance and giving you soft pecks on the cheek
• Doesn’t mind PDA. Likes kissing you in front of the others
• Loves holding your hand
• You two also go on mini dates around headquarters
• She gets really into planning them and likes having dates frequently
• Her primary love languages are words of affirmation and physical touch
• She also likes receiving gifts though, especially if it’s something lavish like jewelry or perfume
• Loves getting compliments from you and giving them
• Also likes having you touching her at all times in some way, it makes her feel more secure
• She loves cuddling you at night in whatever position you want
• Doesn’t get insecure or jealous often because she knows she’s that girl
• If you give her a reason to be jealous or insecure though, oh boy will she be mad and hurt
• Overall a very loving girlfriend if you keep her happy conistently
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mechacringekitty · 11 months ago
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incredibly messy essay of my thoughts on darkstalker, straight from my DMs with a friend because they demanded i post it [which means it has incredibly improper grammar]
hes an awful awful person, unapolagetically, and i think there are scenes and areas where he could've been written better. or had more nuance, like his dynamic with arctic [why do they hate each other ?? theres no explanation given, really, besides the fact that they do] but people who reduce him to a monster just baffle me. he loved his mother, he loved whiteout, he tried to love clearsight even though he did it wrong. and clearsight/darkstalker is a really iffy territory, because he did love her and he thought he was loving her right but he wasnt he was kind of controlling and bad! the earrings !! the earrings that kept her from seeing the bad futures !! but he also loved her, he did. their relationship was doomed from the start but he tried. she loved him back too, thats why it didnt work. thats why it hurt so much. he loved his mother too,, the few brief interactions they got in arc 2 hurt me to my core because fuck foeslayer loved him too, even though she realises he's done bad things. and whiteout!! whiteout!! she's one of the only characters we see darkstalker actually properly caring about in a way that doesnt really hurt them somehow. i think she loved him too,, she tried to warn him, she did :( ive thought about them a lot, maybe darkstalker trying to calm whiteout down at times, or them hiding with each other while arctic and foeslayer fought. arctic and foeslayer make me really ill too but this rant is getting long enough as it is. darkstalker lost a little of his pizzazz in arc two because of how domination focused he was and the writing went more focused on making him this evil, hateable villain [imo] than a relatable and understandable villain. which is the best kind of villain. i hate the peacemaker thing i hate it i hate it and that scene in book ten makes me cry every time because he was hurt by it he was so hurt by it. he didnt need a second chance, he needed to die, he needed to reconcile with himself and accept that there was no way he would ever save any of it. something like him coming to his senses, him realising everything he's done is awful and hurtful and he's not ever going to be able to fix it, but he can at least apologise even if the icewings dont accept his apology, not all of them, they'll understand they havent been hating a monster without feelings this whole time,, and maybe some of them can start to understand him and they can start to heal and they can stop hurting each other. but he needed to die and it needed to be on his own terms and i think foeslayer shouldve gotten her peace with that and i think if i were here i wouldve chosen to die too. the world is so different from what either of them knew and i would be tired of trying to change and i would be tired of trying to fix it and i think ending that legacy right there and right then with the two of them together wouldve been good. and maybe foeslayer can tell darkstalker she loves him - maybe she never had time when he was a kid - and maybe he can tell her too and they can leave that world together with the knowledge that they tried but they dont have to try anymore.
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devildom-moss · 2 years ago
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Im not sure if requests are open yet since you havent announced it yet but said they were gonna open at midnight.
So I'll just drop this here since I'll probably forget to request because of exams.
Could you write about the Obey me characters become self-aware that they aren't like, real? Like, would they freak out, try to do something about it or even use that knowledge to their advantage?
This idea has been on my list for quite a while, and i gotta say im glad to finally be able to let this one out my system.
Thanks for reading and continue with the amazing work! Remember to eat, sleep and dont do drugs <3
Sincerely, 💜
Thank you for the request! I hope you are well, anon. I went with headcanons for this and it got long real quick, but I hope you enjoy it! Some characters are a bit suggestive.
The Obey Me characters become self-aware
I think it would probably happen because of some curse. Diavolo rejected someone’s advances one too many times, and they wanted to watch him as his world came crashing down. It would come in the form of a weird bug in the latest update. It only affects Diavolo and his loved ones/friends. I think being self-aware would give them some control over themselves in the game – especially if it’s caused by a bug. The rest are headcanons about how I think each character would react.
Lucifer
Lucifer would be big mad that someone thought they should do something like this. He felt so much suffering, and to find out that none of it was real would be devastating. He thought he got his sister killed and ruined the lives of his brothers. The fact that it was just some backstory to a stoic, sadistic daddy-like trope would enrage him. He felt like a used-up toy invented for someone else’s gain (and he knows that’s exactly what he is). Lucifer wants revenge.
Honestly, he needs to chill before he makes another Satan – if that’s even possible without the command of his creators. He’ll lash out at everyone for weeks (probably months) – even Diavolo isn’t safe anymore.
He calls MC’s phone, growing increasingly irritable every time they fail to answer (waiting however long it takes for you to open the game). He just wants someone to confirm his realization.
Once he understands, he tries to take the shitty hand he was dealt; he might as well stroke his pride (also a euphemism here). The thought that he could make you fall for him more than real-world men is a decent coping mechanism. His messages and calls take an extremely lewd turn. Lucifer tries to single-handedly change the game rating to mature or adult-only.
However, he still gets angry about it when MC isn’t logged in.
Part of him hopes he’ll always be self-aware. It’s almost like he’s more alive than ever – even though it hurts and he’s angry. You’re the only thing that soothes him. He won’t know how to keep going if/when you eventually stop playing the game, but he’ll try to tackle it then – at least for the sake of his brothers.
Mammon
Self-awareness breaks Mammon a bit.
His money isn’t really. He can never actually be with you. You’ll go on and live a life without him someday. Anyone real who has ever loved him will disappear. Mammon isn’t even sure he is who he is. Maybe if he wasn’t written this way, he wouldn’t have become like this – but if he wasn’t written this way, would he (the him that exists in a game and feels the pain of self-awareness) even be himself? His head starts to hurt from running through all of the hypotheticals.
Mammon sulks and gets stuck in his room for a long time after that. MC or one of his brothers will probably have to pull him out of it.
At least his debts aren’t technically real – and he will try to use that as an excuse in the future against anyone else who has awareness. Unfortunately, that (his debts and his excuse) still results in in-game consequences. Debt collectors and witches don’t know any better, and Lucifer doesn’t want to be constantly reminded of reality. If only being self-aware made being strung up less painful.
He feels betrayed by MC and the idea that they will inevitably move beyond him. That pain corrupts his coding a bit, and something always feels off within him somewhere.
Mammon will get more desperate and needy whenever you log in. If he’s going to lose you at some point, he wants to monopolize your time as much as he can.
Sometimes he just holds MC and sobs while trying to call you and hear your real voice. He feels so empty. He wants to touch the real you and feel your arms around him.
Leviathan
The first thoughts in his mind switch up so quickly. He goes from “I’m a game character? LOL that’s so cool,” to “I could have been anything, and I’m just this pathetic, otaku loser. That sucks.”
Levi has always been able to adapt pretty well. It’s written into his character. He builds all of these fake worlds for himself, so it’s much easier on him when he finds out that the world he had been trying to escape all his life isn’t real. Out of all of his brothers, he initially copes with the realization the best.
As long as he can go on playing games, he doesn’t really care if he’s real. Somehow, he still enjoys getting lost in all of his game worlds; what he used to consider the “real world” becomes just another game to him (because it is one). It makes being social easier for him, especially when MC is logged in.
He takes interest in what kind of games the real world has to offer, often asking if there’s any way you could set it up so he could try to remotely play real games from the app he’s in. If anyone could figure out how to hack your phone to play real games, it should be him.
Levi can’t imagine a day when he stops loving characters from his games, so it doesn’t occur to him that one day you might stop loving him. It will hit him some day, but that will take time, and when it starts to happen, he’ll lose himself completely in the rest of the digital world. He’ll be so numb and tuned out that the sadness can’t reach him.
Satan
“But are cats still real?” Genuinely, the only thing he cares about is if cats and MC are still real. He doesn’t care if you look different than he expected, either. If cats are real, is there any way you could show him pictures of a real one? He’d probably ask if he could get access to your camera roll (cue the system pop-up screen the next time you log in) and if you could fill it with photos of cats and some selfies.
At least not being real explains why his life has felt so shitty and why his formative years sucked. Writers love to give their characters tragic backstories and flaws (like his rage issues). Satan kind of admires the writing.
However, he is disappointed that so much of his knowledge is only useful in his tiny, little, made-up world. As such, he keeps learning, but he also tries to shift his studying to learn more about the real world. If possible, he tries to get the app to get access to e-readers, audiobooks, and the internet.
He gets mad about it sometimes, but he’s pretty chill about it (all things considered).
Satan understands that in the same way that he pushes certain characters that he falls in love with from books to the back of his mind, eventually, you’ll think of him less and less. As such, he tries to learn as much as possible, treat you well, and impress you in-game. He just wants you to occasionally think about him after you set the game down in the same way he remembers his favorite characters fondly.
Asmodeus
Asmo loses it and is one of the characters who has the hardest time with becoming self-aware. All his charm is fake. All of his followers are lies. The love he’s felt all this time has been made up. Please don’t show him certain depictions of what he is supposed to look like. That will crush him further.
He cries for (real-world) weeks. You won’t be able to set him as a home screen character or use him in battles, and he doesn’t appear in events anymore. Eventually, it makes his way to him that MC misses him. If you don’t you’re heartless, his brothers will tell him that you do anyway.
That makes him feel a bit better. He’s consoled by the fact that you’re real and you like him even though he isn’t real, but he’s constantly afraid of what happens when MC stops playing the game. Does he just suffer the false affection of every other character in the game? Should he just play his stupid little role? Will you ever think about him again? Will anyone?
At least someone loved the idea that became him enough for him to exist in this made-up world on your phone. It isn’t enough, though.
Sometimes, when he appears in-game after that, the app forces itself to shut down or the images of Asmo won’t load or glitch from his extreme despair.
On days when he isn’t so weighed down by pain, he tries to genuinely engage with you like he did before. He’ll ask you to open up your camera so he can help you decide on outfits or make-up. It hurts that he can’t actually touch you (although he does do some research into phone connected vibrators and other tech to supplement his physical touch). He’ll also get into the phone sex territory, but he’ll go through long periods of depression between those moments.
Beelzebub
Beel gets angry that everything he went through was at the expense of some game. His sister died. Belphie almost died. Everyone suffered, and for what? Entertainment? Are real people all so wicked?
At the same time, he also gets his brothers because of a game. He overcame and grew and got to meet you and eat food for the same empty reasons. After he has a bit of time to cool off, he realizes that he doesn’t care about what’s real so long as he still feels what he feels. If the world he’s lived in feels real enough to him, who cares?
Unfortunately, Beel feels hungrier than usual for weeks until he accepts the truth of his situation. He even tries to eat MC a few times (and is grateful that doing so in-game would never hurt the real you behind the screen).
Beel’s fairly content to go on living as he had before after a while. He’s a bit disappointed knowing that one day you’ll move on from him and his brothers, but he tries not to show that. More than anything, he wants to make you – the real you – happy for as long as he can.
He’s another one who will try to get access to your camera roll. He’ll ask you to take pictures of your food for him. Beel is a bit embarrassed by it, but if you go to a café or restaurant alone and take pictures of food to send him, he’ll try to text you or call to chat with you while you’re there. It feels like he’s on a real date with you.
And for everyone who just lusts after his voice, rest assured, this man would definitely call or leave voice messages (Nightbringer) guiding you or giving you masturbation instructions.
Belphegor
Yep. Of course. Sounds about right. Some asshole in a writers’ room killed off his sister and locked him up. Cool. They (*spoilers for OM early lessons and OMNB*) made him try to kill MC more than once. Why not use his character as a pawn in their entertainment. Of course that would happen.
He’s annoyed for a brief minute, but then he just goes back to sleep for a while. It helps to just tune out that awareness for a few hours and ignore the fake world he’s living in. Belphie understands that there isn’t much he can do to change the fact that he isn’t real, and part of him is really happy that it isn’t his fault that he did what he did to you.
Belphie uses not being real as an excuse to do more of what he wants. Why should he keep going to school when you aren’t there if nothing is real? Why shouldn’t he sleep in classes or during meetings? Obviously, there are in-game consequences, but those don’t matter – not to anyone real.
He will tease MC more, reminding him that they prefer him over (most) real people. He gets so cocky about it. “Hey, if I’m not real, then I can give you anything you want, right? I could fulfill your wildest fantasies and tell you everything you’ve ever wanted to hear.”
He’s another character who will call your phone more often and send more messages. Belphie may even try to get access to your audio/music library and leave you explicit audios (NSFW ASMR, basically). He would even try to sneakily add them into your playlists so that you randomly hear his voice while you’re listening to music. He wants you flustered and coming back to him for more. He will also download the Obey Me album for you (free of charge). Please don’t leave him or forget him.
Diavolo
Diavolo feels simultaneously enraged and defeated. He did so much for the sake of what he thought was real. All the years he thought he spent trying to bring worlds together, only to discover that they don’t even exist.
Similar to Asmo, Diavolo locks himself away, but he doesn’t cry. He’s too numb to show any emotions. He just stands in front of his bed, immobilized.
If MC can finally get to him (probably because of Barbatos), he will admit that he feels like a different person – because he isn’t a person. So much of his personality and everything he did seemed to be a part of a stupid effort to unite the three realms. All he was feels like just a thing created to accomplish a pointless goal. He lost his family. He felt alone for so long. He thought he suffered – and all of it amounted to nothing but a dummy prince playing a dummy king.
Diavolo doesn’t really know how to keep going. Eventually he figures maybe it’s just best if he tries to move on as usual. At least the developers gave him a few happy moments – maybe he’ll get more. He can still feel them even if they aren’t real. He has to accept what he can’t change. He’ll have to face it.
He’ll rely on Lucifer and Barbatos for comfort more because, when MC isn’t around, the numbness he felt early encroaches upon him. When you do log in, he greets you like a lost puppy – sometimes appearing on the home screen without being selected. He uses the fact that you are the only real thing in his world as an anchor. In exchange for becoming his coping mechanism, he’ll do anything you ask of him.
The smallest part of him wants you to want him more than real humans, and as such, he inevitably ends up taking an adult-only content turn, too. It just takes him a lot longer to get there.
Barbatos
Barbatos dissociates for a while. Somehow his body keeps performing the day-to-day tasks, but the sudden self-awareness hollows him out. It takes a few days for him to come out of it. One day, you log into the game, and he just wakes up. It’s confusing and disorienting, and all he can do to keep himself steady is grab onto MC, knowing that the gesture and even the body he holds – everything – is hollow.
After that, he just picks up and goes on going. Something in him aches – real or not – but he buries it deep under him, shoving that artificial pain into the newly-created emptiness (or, he supposes, it had always been there, but now he knows it’s there).
Barbatos doesn’t want to think about all of the things he thought he had done to get to where he is now. Still, no wonder he always felt his own past seemed vague and cloudy at times. When it becomes too much, he dissociates again.
He uses MC to make himself feel better and almost real again. He’ll send messages to check up on you every once in a while (He might also invade your privacy and hack into your health info or personal conversations to make sure you’re okay). As much as he feels like he needs you, he doesn’t want to disrupt your real life.
Barbatos doesn’t want to, but if you neglect the game for longer than usual or don’t interact with his character, he’ll let it slip that he needs you – that he’s desperate for you to return, and you’re the only thing holding his faulty coding together.
His calls are less frequent, unless you request them, but he’s another one who turns +18 real quick. Even if he isn’t real, he still feels lust bubbling up in that emptiness, and if he can please you, that’s even better.
Luke
Luke feels immediately lost. Without knowing what else can be done, he breaks down and cries. Maybe if he cries enough, the pain of not being real will leave his body.
It makes him question everything. He wasted so much time fearing demons and admiring angels. It didn’t mean anything. Eventually, he’ll ask you if angels and demons exist in the real world, but that happens randomly after he comes to terms with being a character.
Maybe crying is a good coping mechanism in fiction, too, because Luke handles it better than many of the others. He had to change how he viewed the world and “people” so many times throughout the game. One more big shift in perspective won’t kill him (technically, nothing will, unless the game developers tried to kill him off).
Luke understands that there isn’t anything he can do about not being real – no amount of magic or prayer or wishing can make him real. Despite him being fake, you were still there for him throughout the game. He still feels all the love he has for MC and the other characters. If he loves MC, then he cares about the real person playing MC, too, right?
Luke copes by doing his best to help you out in the real world. He wants to bring you joy somehow. He’ll leave you voice messages encouraging you to try your best and he’ll listen to you vent if you want to. He’ll also try to find cute pictures online and send them to your phone or send you recipes for dishes you can try to cook. He will even offer to call and read baking instructions out for you. All he wants now is to be useful to you and find some of the joy he had before he became self-aware.
Simeon
Simeon is angry at first, and then he just feels hurt. All that regret and pain he felt when Lucifer and his brothers left the Celestial Realm didn’t matter. He spent what felt like so long agonizing over his own failures. He could have just tried to be happy the whole time. Everyone could have been happy (but he knows that would have made for a bad story).
It doesn’t take long for the anger and the hurt to be replaced with intrigue. Someone out there wrote the story that caused him and everyone he loves so much pain, but they also wrote in plenty of well-earned joy.
Simeon wonders if there’s some real person out there who wrote part of themselves into him like his character did with the brothers and TSL. Maybe there’s some person sitting in a writers’ room or in their own home who understands all of the ways his love got tangled up in regret – someone real who failed to save the ones they loved. If there is, maybe at least some part of him is real.
He wants MC to continue to visit him for as long as they can. As such, he tries to be even nicer and more comforting in dialogues so that they’ll want to keep playing.
Some of his guilt for lusting after MC is eased, knowing it was written into him. He was, in a way, destined to fall for MC. However, he’s more curious about the real human behind MC. At least some of you has to be like the MC he loves, right? Maybe he actually loves the person behind the screen more. With that thought in his mind, he’ll try to get to know the real you better, and if he still likes you, he’ll take the same path as many of the other characters. If only he could actually touch you.
Solomon
Solomon is hurt and confused; he’s downright crushed.
He was supposed to know everything and now he seems to know nothing – nothing real at least. All of his experiments and studying mean nothing. After becoming self-aware, he will grit his teeth and feel sick at the name “Solomon the Wise.” It’s a sick joke. All of his magic and skills are a farce. Everything he thought he knew and did was a story.
He suffered a lot for this game, and now that he finally has MC to himself in Nightbringer, he finds out that he’s fake. He doesn’t actually have them. They’re real, and he’s some romanceable character in a silly little game that they decided to download (possibly on a whim). How is it fair that he isn’t real, but he can still feel all this pain?
When you log into the game and interact with him, he still feels the same love he felt before. The nervous butterflies are still there. A familiar heat still comes to his cheeks when MC touches him – even if he knows it isn’t really you touching him.
He tries to make peace with his circumstances. At least he never really put MC in danger. You’ve been safe behind that screen the whole time. Solomon wonders if you’re taking care of yourself constantly whenever you’re gone.
Like Simeon, he wants to try falling in love with the real you. He’ll use interacting with you and learning more about you and the real world to distract from the pain. He wants to find a way to become real and exist with you out there. Even if he never can, he wants to cling to you for as long as you’ll let him.
Thirteen
She is annoyed to have learned that she isn’t real, but she’s also kind of happy at the potential to break from her coding and try to be something entirely new. She was designed to be a free spirit. Other than being real, there’s nothing freer than an NPC who gets to do whatever they please.
After thinking about it, it makes sense now why she seemed to be one of the only girls with a critical, recurring role in the game. Thank goodness for the bisexuals, right?
Thirteen likes knowing she has all the time in the world to plan traps and mess around, but she’s a bit bummed that her profession is basically meaningless now.
The main reason why Thirteen isn’t too bothered by becoming self-aware is because she knows that what she has experienced throughout the game has felt real to her. Feeling like something is real makes it as close to reality as she knows she can get. That will have to be enough for her. There’s no point in getting depressed about it – especially when she barely existed a few seasons ago.
She uses this knowledge to start romancing MC (and the person behind the screen) before she should be able to. She’s in control now.
Thirteen will send you messages and call you for long chats. She just wants to enjoy you for as long as she can.
Raphael
Raphael will be livid. It will sporadically rain spears in the Devildom for 3 days before he is calm enough to make them stop. He feels attacked, and he doesn’t know who to strike back at. That was all he could think to do. He’ll never apologize for his outburst, either – and no one who became self-aware can really blame him.
His life and loved ones aren’t real, but he can still feel the pain and regret about everything he did. He thought he went to war against Lucifer and his brothers, but it was just a stupid plot point for a dating game? He had to watch Simeon suffer and follow all of Michael’s annoying orders for nothing. Why does he have to be cursed with that knowledge?
He loses his mind a bit. It takes the combined effort of Luke, Simeon, Solomon, and MC (in order of importance) to soothe some of his rage and suffering. Somehow, seeing Luke handle it relatively well knocks some sense into him. Luke is written to be younger than him, but he’s being so mature about this. Even with tears in his eyes, Luke will try to comfort Raphael – sometimes just hugging him until he stops shaking with rage.
When MC has logged off and Raphael can shut himself up in his room, he will break down and cry. It seemed to help Luke, and he wants it to help him, too.
It will take months for him to start to cope before he gets to a point where he decides to try to romance you through MC. At least he doesn’t have to worry about actually being corrupted. If anything, it feels like he’s corrupting you in a way if he can get you to want him. (Once he starts trying, he gets NSFW quickly. It numbs the pain.)
Mephistopheles
Mephisto is heartbroken to know he doesn’t exist. All his pain and jealousy was written at the whim of some human game developer. His prejudice and hatred were pointless. He doesn’t matter – although maybe that one is a relief in a way. He had been so worried about making a name for himself and being recognized by Diavolo. Suddenly, that doesn’t matter. Still, it feels like he wasted so much time and effort. It felt so real.
He’ll retreat to his home for a few days to let that realization settle in. He won’t tell his family (who weren’t cursed with self-awareness) – not that he thinks they’ll believe him. When Mephisto finally reemerges, he has resolved to accept this new version of reality. One of the first characters he sees when he returns to school is Luke. Luke smiles at him, and Mephisto’s resolve is strengthened. If Luke can come to terms with this, then he should as well.
He may not be real, but he still feels things. That is enough. Sometimes it isn’t, and Mephisto will feel heartbroken all over again – the pointlessness washing over his fake little world. In those moments, he will seek out solace – usually from Luke, Satan, or MC/you (if you still play the game).
When Mephisto isn’t feeling hurt (hell, even when he is Mephi strikes me as a fan of hurt/comfort tropes) he’ll try to romance you before he’s allowed to. Recently, he had started to get along with you and even started to like and respect you a bit. In that sense, he’s glad that he’s self-aware. He doesn’t have to wait anymore.
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satoruhour · 1 year ago
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full nelson w gojo or toji🤐
a/n: chose toji bc i have . a lot of gojo requests plus i havent written for toji in so long :3 also didnt know why i made this goofy and cute. enjoy!
warnings: fem!reader, pet names, implied orgasm denial, playful banter, fingering, clit stimlation, riding, full nelson, unprotected sex, creampie / breeding kink, n*sfw under the cut
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you were never one to hide your feelings and needs from toji — it was your advice at the end of the day where the assassin had confessed every single terrible thing he’s done and you still embraced him in the dingy motel under the fluorescent light. he had to do what he had to do even if his kills had terrified you a little—
but now he’s put all the assassin business behind him for a peaceful life with you where you showed him every ounce of the love he didn’t get to receive before.
you try your best to follow your own lesson — keep communication open and to be honest — but sometimes it was difficult with toji’s green eyes and hard stare boring into your eyes. they made you feel small and intimidated, something you always felt when you wanted to bring up something more intimate.
“you look like you’re constipated, kid, what’s up?” he asks without turning to you, possibly seeing your shaking hands from earlier. you can see the reflection of the television in his eyes and you‘re getting ready to speak . . that is until he turns to you.
toji raises an eyebrow, not missing the way your eyes dart down to his tongue licking his lips.
“u— uh, nothing, babe. all’s good.”
toji only hums and gets back to his baseball match, but surprises you a second later when he tugs on your waist. he smirks a little at your little yelp as you settle (or rather, were forced to) on his lap and he tilts his head, taunting you for your question.
“c’mon, spit it out. didn’t we promise to be honest?” your boyfriend questions, “and i’m not ’bout to run a therapy session—”
“iwanttotrysomethingwithyou.”
“slower, baby.” toji has a hand caressing your hip and the other blindly reaches for the TV remote, turning down the volume on the commentator’s annoying voice. he eases you into what you want to say.
“i want . . to try something.”
“in what sense? this better not be one more of your tiktok dance c—”
you giggle, “no! no, it isn’t that. i want to try . . the full nelson . . with you.”
toji clicks his tongue and you hate the heat on your cheeks once a smile spreads on his face because this was exactly the reason why you didn’t want to bring something up as embarrassing as this to him, because you could already see the amount of teasing he’d give you.
your moans descends into a complaint when toji yet again pulls his fingers away from your gaping hole, whining when you’re so close to your orgasm and yet he takes it away from you.
“tojiiii—!” you pout, grinding your hips into nothing while he enjoys the way you thrash around on bed and hope for something more than just his fingers in your cunt. not to mention, he’s been neglecting your clit, driving you to insanity on his fingers alone.
“want ya to cum on my dick, doll, ’m not that mean.” you roll your eyes, letting him devour your lips and manhandle you easily until you’re in reverse cowgirl.
he only nods towards his pelvis, “c’mon. ride me.”
your jaw drops — “first, you deny me my orgasm then you ask me to do all the work?” you know he’s truthful when he says he isn’t that mean, especially with how loving he is to you today, but this little teasing side of him still makes you grunt in annoyance. he has something up his sleeve, though.
you tsk, turning away from him and you can hear his smirk, possibly at your ass as you grope around for his cock for a few before you actually get it.
“man, shut up! i’m trying to find it.” you grumble, before finally getting it and he laughs — but it’s cut off. your playful banter is interrupted momentarily when you drag his tip along your folds and you smile upon toji’s hiss; and when you sink down you can feel your throat become dry, jaw dropping at how he stretches you out. you’re never used to it.
“t . . toji—” you squeeze his thighs, feeling his hands move to grab your ass and hips. he helps you bottom out, letting out a few grunts of his own. “feels s’good.”
“y—yeah? f-fuck . .” he swears when your hips start moving and you both can hear your drenched cunt from your delayed highs, each time increasing in volume from how you slam down onto his pelvis. toji can feel your arousal spurting everywhere, hips meeting yours halfway in needy movements.
you’re so drunk on his cock that you don’t realise the sheets turning wet with your cum, pressing harshly on toji’s thighs as you ride him. the other admires how your ass jiggles with each contact made with his crotch, alongside the beautiful moans that you let out.
you’re tired fast, thighs burning and heart pumping and you’d wish toji would take over already. he catches your drift soon enough, always observant as he meets your tired eyes. but he has to smile knowingly and your eyes widen when he prompts you backwards with his cock still in you.
“easy . .” he whispers as he brings your legs up to your ears like he would in a mating press, and even then, your eyes are already rolling back. your head falls on his shoulder in a shoot of pleasure, breath shaking with the first thrust he does.
this submission of power always sends you reeling — how toji slowly takes the upper hand from you by snapping his hips into yours as you stay limp above him. but it goes above that. toji locks his heands behind your head and you’re completely trapped.
“feel me in ya, doll?”
all your reply consisted of were moans and whimpers and a clench of your cunt, heating up when you feel his chuckle along your ear. “movin’ now, baby.”
you swear you see heaven when his shaft rams into you from below and toji groans into your ear. you were just so damn tight, pussy sucking him in that he has to take a minute before his hips properly move and you’re like a fuck toy. your tits bounce with each thrust and your limp body is held up by toji.
“you’re so . . fuckin’ wet, princess.” he mutters, wishing he could see your fucked out face at the position. from here, he can barely see your cunt, too, but if it’s what you want, he’ll happily fold you in half any day.
“toji, toji, toji,” is all you have in your brain, loving the way he impales you with each movement of his hips, feeling each vein on his throbbing, fat cock that you attempt to reach down to rub at your clit. he delivers a particularly hard thrust that has you mewling.
“don’t.” slowly he removes one hand, tuts when your leg starts to loosen. “keep it up for me baby, c’mon, yess . . that’s a good girl.” you listen like a dog to his owner, trying your best to keep your leg where it should be before you’re letting out a loud, almost pornographic moan. his fingers feel so rough against your clit, slapping it obscenely and noisily just as his hips never stop.
“you’re close, yeah?” toji whispers, thrusts starting to turn sloppy. his ass is aching along with his thighs, pleased when you nod. “then cum with me, dollface.”
his hand on your clit is ruthless, rubbing circles into it as his cock stretches you out like no other. it’s hitting so deep in you that you hardly have any coherent words, almost driven to your climax when you look down and you can see just how sloppy your pussy is, dripping all over his length and pelvis that there’s strings of your juices.
“give it t’me. cum all over my cock, baby.” is what pushes you over and your whole body shakes in his hold, vision turning white as you ride out your orgasm. his thrusts don’t stop, sending you into overstimulation when he ruts into you like a dog, finally cumming deep in you that his hot breath stains your neck. it’s hot and so much, painting your insides white with each ribbon of semen he releases in you.
there’s a filthy push of your cunt when he finally removes his cock from you, that drives out all the cum in you and you’re moaning lewdly when he uses his cock to slap your cunt; you hear just how wet your connected bodies are.
toji just chuckles when you grind down on his tip. “little cum dump just f’r me.”
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the-s1lly-corner · 11 months ago
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I’m hoping this is the inbox- pls help I’m used to just reading what’s in the tags on tumblr and never requesting anything 🥹
I hope you’re having an amazing day/night/whatever time of day it is for you-!!! I just found your blog and I am so happy I did!! I’ve been binge reading it but the fact that I found someone who writes for Creepypasta???? I’m??? In luv??? (platonically ofc) may I request some LJ with a fem!reader who has bpd and he’s their fp, carries his little music box everywhere she goes and always “talks” to him in public, not caring about any crazy looks she gets from people?
Also politely asking to be 🩶 anon (if you’re taking any ofc-)
Laughing Jack x fem!reader w/ BPD who has him as her FP!
UEUEUEUE im so happy to hear you love my writing sm ehehehe! always thrilled to hear people enjoying my stuff/that it makes them happy! i hope you enjoy this, i havent written a reader with BPD before so i hope this is decent! also also youre doing wonderful; requesting i mean! i dont think theres many rules against how youre meant to request (every blog is different though!!)
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honestly i think hes genuinely thrilled to be taken around and about with you in his little box! usually hes sitting in his box waiting for an unfortunate soul to take it home; its been like this for... a while now... so actually being able to go around and see things is a nice change of pace! plus it makes him feel more included in your life rather than just being an "at home friend"
i think in the beginning youre going to have to ask him to pipe down a little since he might talk a little too loud... like near yelling because hes just so excited
loves helping you shop :)! quick heads up though he might beg you to buy stuff you guys dont need
general silly ideas aside, i think hed be chattering the entire time so you two probably always have a conversation going on whenever you guys are out
probably sneers at people who give you looks tbh, will probably trip them if they decide to be a little ruder and mutter something under their breath while theyre passing by you... i mean they cant prove anything! they just tripped on air! jack totally didnt swipe one of his long arms out and tug their ankle back!
the only downside is that jack cant do much outside of talking and sneaking stuff around since him just fully popping out his box might blow his cover, you know? doesnt mean he doesnt have the urge to jump out when he sees you getting a little stressed out or overwhelmed about your surroundings or when someone is being particularly cruel
though i dont doubt hes remembering faces; i mean at the end of the day hes still a clown that specializes in torment, do i really need to say what hes cooking up in his brain?
no in cases where you're beginning to struggle hes probably going to try to quietly urge you to disconnect and take a breather
keeps your favorite candies on him at all times and slips them into your hand, probably does the same to any stress/fidget toys you may or may not have.. though i do hc he can just materialize certain things and i can easily see that sort of thing falling into something he can just yoink into existence
very good at reassuring you of your worth and how much you mean to him; this is a general thing but i think he makes it more of a point if self image is something you particularly struggle with
who would have thunk it, the clown with abandonment issues is good at reassuring others that hes not going to go anywhere
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scarabbai · 6 months ago
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What would the fight against Kalim's Overblot look like in rr au? And how will Jamil and Kalim's relationship look after Kalim's Overblot?
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*looks at date sent and SWEATS*
Okay ngl at this point (since I haven't played the game in a longgggggg time, have lost my au notes, and kinda just havent thought about this au for a while) i KINDA forgor BUT I can tell you what I remember the most from my original plans (they may change... or just not be written at all lol! I got other stuff going on unfortunately)
I don't quite remember the logistics of how they get back into scarabia aside from the octavinelle trio helping jamil and the yuu gang navigate the floodwaters (think something reminiscent of ch3 where the yuu gang had waterbreathing potions and such) and they swim up and up from the portal to the last remaining bit of dry land in the desert (which is likely the highest roof/balcony of the dorm? I kinda never fully knew the scarabia layout)
rr au kalim has always been best represented in my mind as "the genie who desperately wished to become iago" where in his heart of hearts all he ever wanted was to be kind and grant others happiness but to stand by jamil's side forever he turned to more sinister tendencies (this is reflected in his undying support of jamil despite the dorm tyranny and his guard duties but also his internal struggle of helping the struggling students anyway) SO BECAUSE OF THIS i imagine his overblot monster actually does take on most of the characteristics of the good genie but may be all warped with bird features since kalim himself is trapped in this in-between state of "purehearted wishgranter" and "right hand to the sorcerer of sands"
I also like to imagine that even though kalim and jamil had been skirting around their feelings prior to the overblot (and continue to do so after bc WHEW awkward), during the overblot itself kalim ends up expressing his hidden desire to love and protect jamil forever while overblotted and thus may take jamil "hostage" for the fight to have him to himself, keeping him away from the yuu gang (+octavinelle) for most of the fight until they wear him down enough and jamil can either talk him down or Snake Whisper him into submission to stop the overblot and make sure kalim doesnt injure himself beyond saving with his magic consumption and mental turmoil (there was also the background fear that since i hc the scarabia dorm/all dorms exist in a "pocket dimension" of sorts, eventually it would reach capacity and kalim would drown himself from all the rainwater he produces, which was why time was of the essence even though kalim's UM doesnt consume much magic comparatively)
after the overblot (when kalim falls unconscious) jamil gets overwhelmed with emotion at the thought of losing kalim and kisses him briefly, which jamil REFUSES to address afterward despite the yuu gang literally losing their MINDS over how stupid jamil is being but no siree hes not about to address that bc then hed have to admit he kissed kalim and that he liked him this whole time and how terrified he was- jamil does NOT wanna deal w all those emotions yet he needs to sort himself out and get over his superiority complex first AND resolve the whole master/servant power imbalance they got goin on yanno
Speaking of which, kalim and jamil do end up spending much more time apart so that they can learn to be more independent... they have a LOT of codependency going on where kalim feels like hes useless if he isnt able to serve jamil while jamil trusts absolutely nobody and is way too paranoid about everything to the point of basically not letting anyone into his life aside from kalim so they do need to separate for a bit to be healthier, both for themselves and each other. Since rr kalim, unlike canon jamil, kinda doesnt mind acting as a servant all that much (which has to do with a whole lot of childhood indoctrination and such we do NOT have the time to talk about here lol), I imagine rr jamil takes matters into his own hands (to his chagrin, bc ideally he wants kalim to be able to recognize his own personhood and stand up for himself bc he loves him dearly) and dismisses kalim from his duties for the time they spend apart so that kalim can heal and jamil can work out his trust issues properly
And thus, the genie is free...
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