#i havent done one in ages cus i only came back on tumblr like a couple of months ago i dont even know who im mutuals with anymore

[sadpeopledancing]

Tag Game

Rules: Tag ten mutuals you want to know better.

i was tagged by @apopstarontheradio (thank you, lovely!!)

Name: esphir

Star sign: pisces

Height: 1,71 m

Put your iTunes (or Spotify) on shuffle. What are the first 4 songs that popped up?

1. help me lose my mind - disclosure, london grammar

2. obvs - jamie xx

3. isolation - joy division

4. miserable america - kevin abstract

Ever had a poem or song written about you?

not that i’m aware of at least! usually i’m the one who writes about other people cus i get caught in my feelings a lot and i like poetry and then it’s too late and i’m on my second bottle of wine and allen ginsberg’s style unfinished poem on my phone

When was the last time you played guitar?

about a year ago at my best friend’s party when a completely smashed me tried to remember how to play all apologies (yes, i’m an alcoholic)

Who is your celebrity crush?

who isn’t my celebrity crush i’ve been calling kristen stewart my wife since 2008 so i guess she’s my main mvp but also nick grimshaw is the loml, king princess, frances bean, yuri pleskun, adore delano so basically what i’m trying to say is that i’m a raging bisexual

What’s a sound you hate + a sound you love?

living in manchester by the police station made me hate police/ambulance siren with all of my being cus that’s literally the only thing you hear here

i love the sound of thunderstorms! and sometimes i fall in love with people’s voice (like when you want to listen to them harry talk forever) because they make you feel safe

Do you believe in ghosts?

i don’t believe in ghosts per se; i believe in energy. that when someone dies they leave their energy here, be it in their favorite places (like you know when you’re somewhere which meant a lot to that person and you can just feel them?? that sort of thing) or things. or even in general. ghosts are usually considered to be something “creepy” but for me that energy doesn’t have a physical form. it’s more like.. a feeling. that you can feel them near. energy never truly dies.

How about aliens?

for sure. i love reading and learning about the universe and everything we’ve discovered so far but there’s still so much to unravel and thinking that we are the only ones out there is silly. we don’t even matter that much in the grand scheme of things tbqh (also wouldn’t it be a bit sad if in the universe of billions and billions galaxies we were all alone? like completely utterly alone? that’s not a blessing, that’s a curse)

Do you drive?

no and i don’t really want to. i think it’s just too much responsibility and my anxiety disorder doesn’t ever let me rest

What was the last book you read?

in utero by gillian g. gaar. it’s a small but wonderful book giving the full story behind the recording process of nirvana’s in utero so i would highly recommend it to whoever is interested!

Do you like the smell of gasoline?

i actually can’t recall the smell but i like the smell of sharpies so i reckon i could be into gasoline as well (that sounded less weird in my head i’m sorry)

What’s the worst injury you’ve ever had?

i had both of my arms broken many years ago and managed to drop a pan with boiling water onto my leg burning off the entire front of my thigh so pain/healing process wise they were both on the same level

Do you have any obsessions right now?

strangely enough i don’t think i do. yeah this is mostly a harry/nick blog but loving them is like a part of me already cause it’s been so long. i am however really into self-growth lately? like getting my shit together and being better mentally? like loving myself and all that nonsense? idk if that counts

Do you tend to hold grudges against people who have done you wrong?

i used to but i try to forgive people and be more patient if i really care about them. however, it took me a really long time to learn how to let people go when you know that it won’t work out

In a relationship?

nope