#i have to sleep now but i will be writing platt fam content this week

[gregorygerwitz]

I will always ask for more, lol! Tell me more about truly and mouse and how she adopted him! I love that!

Should I go to sleep on time? Yes. Am I going to? No. I'm going to make gifs and rewatch clips of the three (3) actual Mouse & Trudy scenes so I can yell about the little found family that I love so, so much, because at any given moment I am thinking about them. this is more important than being rested for work honestly

The thing is, we don't get a lot of content for them, and that makes sense considering how big the ensemble was back when Mouse was on the show (there was a full Intelligence team, plus two regular patrol characters, whereas now we really only focus on Intelligence, which has open spots, and there are no regular patrol characters). All we get for them are small scenes that I love to read into. Because I'm me.

Basically, Mama Bear Trudy™ has low key adopted everyone at some point, but there are a few people she adopted especially hard. Mouse is one of them.

(under a cut because so many gifs and so much babbling) (warnings for: brief mention of Mouse's time in the army and allusion to his medical discharge, gifs featuring guns, discussion of typical procedural violence including a snippet of canon dialogue about a murder-suicide inside of a police station)

The first scene they actually have together is in 2x16, when Trudy is interviewing him for the tech position in intelligence. Mouse spends the entire time fidgety and anxious

affectionately, Mouse.exe has crashed. which is fair. interviews are stressful. especially when this poor boy has mommy issues and now he's faced with *gestures to the energy in the room* it's just. he's not having a good time. which means this is Trudy's very first impression of him that isn't some story Jay told about their time in the army and it's heavily implied that Jay doesn't like talking about it, so the first she could have heard of Mouse was idk maybe Adam making a comment about the case he helped with in s1

and she can kind of... tell that he's anxious. mostly because he's really not hiding it.

and for context, the dialogue in this scene kind of adds to the Vibe™

T: "So, you were a Ranger." M: "Yes, uh, yes. Sergeant. I did, uh, two tours in Afghanistan." T: "Why'd you leave the unit?" M: "Well, the Army gave me the confidence to pursue my dreams. That's why I'm here today." T: "What's this about a medical discharge?" M: "Yes. Yes, ma'am." T: "...Why the medical discharge, Mouse?" M: "Uhm... well, there was a- there was a convoy, and, uh, I was- I was in the- the lead Humvee. It- it was me and Jay, actually... um... um..." T: "Hey." M: "Huh?" T: "We're good."

it's the way I could write essays about this scene alone and the way Mouse zones out while thinking about his trauma and the very gentle "hey [...] we're good" like yes Trudy I also immediately adopted him that's extremely valid

But that's really the first hint we get of their relationship, this very gentle moment that is such a sharp contrast to his other interview with Voight earlier in the episode. That one was very "explain your felony record and prove that you deserve to be here," whereas Trudy is so much more... relaxed, almost? He's already proved himself to Voight, so she kind of just brushes off the record and it's not up to her to decide if he's capable of the job, she just has to give him clearance and... basically check his vibes.

And then she gets to see this moment of vulnerability where he's being asked to be open and talk about this huge traumatic thing that happened to him, and you know what? maybe she will go easy on him. if he's good enough for Jay to call him a friend and good enough that Voight is willing to look past his record, then that's good enough for her too.

And by the time we get to the next real scene they have together (in 3x03), they're closer. They have this little kind of banter that's so light even in the busy lobby while she's trying to handle like 20 people at once. Even when she brushes him off, it's so much gentler than the frustrated orders she was giving to the other officers and civilians around them.

M: "Hey, Sarge. I need you signature on this requisition form. Voight wants new pinhole cameras." T: "Not now, Mouse." M: "He was very clear about his instructions. You gonna send me back empty-handed?"

Then, as he's being pushed aside, Mouse still does this little "no!" that is just. I love it. I love him. It's so glorious I mean. look at him.

It's this very familiar moment in the midst of all this chaos and I love it so much.

And then seconds later, Mouse gets grabbed, and who's the first person to react? Mom™

immediately, Trudy has her gun out, and she's ready to go. Mama Bear Mode™ is activated. someone threatened a cub and she's out for blood.

and I've already screamed about this little moment a million times, but I've been thinking all day about how Mouse is so calm through all of this. he's got a gun to his head for hours during the episode, and he's very calm through most of it, even putting on a braver face at one point. hard and determined instead of calm and neutral. but there is one moment where he shows his fear and it's this moment:

when he looks from Voight, to Kim, and then to Trudy. and it's the one time all episode that he shows his fear, and we see that Trudy also sees that look, and she's still pissed someone has her son at gunpoint of course she's pissed

There's another moment, later in the episode, when Mouse is inside and still being held hostage, where Trudy goes to Voight to talk to him about it, I don't have a gif of it but she does that anxiety thing where she keeps tucking her hair back even when it's already behind her ears? that constant I Need To Be Doing Something motion. it makes me feel things

T: "There was a guy who walked into the 31st, years back - bad domestic." V: "He had a .32 in his sock, killed his wife, a cop, and then himself." T: "The district, the front desk, it's a sacred place. If people don't feel safe walking in there-" V: "Trudy. This isn't gonna end like that." T: "You make sure, Hank."

She never says that she's worried about Mouse specifically, but she doesn't have to. Even Voight is quick to jump in and reassure her that no one is going to get shot or hurt like that - and the most obvious person in danger in that moment, the only person he would need to reassure anyone about, is Mouse. Who, let's be honest, Trudy would have legally adopted and put it on paper if he wasn't 30.

the fact that we get no follow up on all of Trudy's worry and we don't even get to see her reaction when they get him out of there safe is an attack on me personally. that is his Mom™ and we don't even get to see her checking on him after that ordeal? fake. I guess I have to write the fic myself.

And then we really don't get any other scenes of them together until over a season later. We don't get any major interaction, rarely anything with them in the same room, until 4x05. Then we get the favors, and all of the implications that come with that. Trudy even goes to his goodbye party at Molly's.

And apparently the CPD writers are trying to torture me because we've gotten two episodes in s9 that feature Trudy sitting in Mouse's old tech cage and helping Intelligence. Sitting in his chair and doing his old job. And it makes me feel things.

TLDR;;

Trudy took one look at Mouse and just automatically adopted him which makes me feel incredibly perceived. but unlike Voight who's upstairs playing favorites, she consistently looks out for him and shows concern and that makes me feel so many things I miss them I want this back.