#i have so many words blocked but it doesnt help if you just post screenshots

[bairdcrevan]

Jfc if people could please tag your damn posts when you have triggering content like death of children that would be nice I'm just trying to look at posts about transformers. It's just thoughtful?

[heavyyhearts-blog]

actually heres my side

“ first, before getting to real stuff, aya has done this to other people in the past too. when she talked about them to me she said they abused her or abandoned her suddenly. i’ve only talked to one of these people, but they confirmed that aya actually abused, and then stalked them when they cut her off. i don’t have permission to post these logs so out of respect i won’t put them here. “

ive never been very clear in talking about my past experiences with most people. you make this sound as if every person that's ever "abandoned me" were all "abused" by me, when that's not the case. have i acted in shitty ways to some people? yes, but it never had anything to do with me being abandoned, at any point. one of these people, actually straight up disappeared from my life, and i have no idea why. they disappeared off skype and i havent seen them since. we had no problems between eachother whatsoever. a different example i can think of for someone i was talking about? they left because i was too stressful to be around. as in, i always complained too much and that kind of thing and it was too much to be around. i didnt even know them very long.  another example of a person i mentioned with that: they had really bad schizophrenia and like, trauma issues, and what happened there? they'd randomly like? actually start basically splitting on me and getting extremely angry at me out of nowhere for no reason, which i tried to be really tolerable of, until things basically got too much for either of us to handle and after a bit of dumb drama, we separated with , i believe, no hard feelings.

my point being? when i say "ive been abandoned by a lot of people" or whatever, im not literally claiming that i was abused by literally everyone and im some huge victim, lol. that last example? you could probably say i was abused due to the level of pent up anger they were throwing at me, , unprovoked

“ i’ve only talked to one of these people, but they confirmed that aya actually abused, and then stalked them when they cut her off “

first of all, this happened literal years ago. second of all, this person is still full of shit and i can't believe they still insist all of these bullshit lies. "aya stalked me" i hadnt visited your blog for months, i'd literally forgotten about you, yet you somehow still had it set in your head that i was "stalking" you. i wanted to remake my blog for a multitude of reasons, and one of them being, a more back of my mind thing, was, i didnt want you viewing my blog. so i remade. and, like, 2-3 days later, i got paranoid that you had somehow found my new blog, entirely new, so i asked my friend to go see if my new url was on there, because i didnt want to go back on your blog myself. and sure enough, there it was, my new url, even though i hadn't given it out to anyone or posted it anywhere, meaning you literally searched through notes of a post or something along those lines to find it. yeah ive explained this so many times now its fun :) not to mention your shitty friend(s) that would constantly twist my words around and lie saying i was doingthings that i didnt. and your only "proof" was logs of talking shit about me behind my back to one of my friends, you had no screenshots of me doing anything, because guess what, i never did it. wow. "i dont have screenshots because i deleted them all" okay bud. anyway

and now here's my main issue with everything: you are "calling me out" for things we have already personally talked about, that we either resolved, or i apologized for/said that i would try to stop doing so i can better myself which i have actually done? so i literally do not understand why youre calling me out for shit as if im some malicious person trying to hurt people that's just completely incapable of getting better or whatever. lets start

“i’ve tried to cut her off several times, both by trying to talk and express my want to stop talking to her first and by just blocking/ignoring her on everything. i made it clear i wanted to stop talking the first couple of times. she will spam and beg me and make new accounts if she has to. once ive added her back however she’s used that against me”

okay youre calling me out for this but you admitted what you did was fucked up too? and i dont know what else to even say to this other than im going to try to stop getting so attached to people like that so i maybe dont have such bad mental breakdowns every time i thnk someone close to me is leaving like sorry i cant. help feeling that way or control this thing specifically unless i just dont get attached like that at all, which is my fault.

[x] [x] [x]

here, you post a completely out of context rant from me, where i got mad at something you did that you literally admitted was fucked up. full context!

[x] [x] [x] [x] [x]

you even told me you had no idea what you were talking about with any of it.

“ one of the times that we weren’t talking she DMd my twitter mutuals asking them to screenshot my recent tweets. “

i told you my reason for it. i was extremely paranoid that you were talking shit about me behind my back and i wanted to know if you were or not, even though i did it in a really shitty way. i instantly felt so beyond terrible that i had done that. i was sobbing the entire time i was trying to apologize for how fucked up and wrong it was of me to do that, and even apologized for it again later after it had happened already. because i wanted to make sure you knew how sorry i was for it. i cant take something like that back.

[x] [x]

“recently, after getting so upset with me for doing the same thing in the past, she randomly blocked me on everything and refused to talk to me. i would understand if she hadn’t previously gotten so mad and upset at me for the exact same thing. “

?? i split really bad just like i already have been, due to , as i've already exlpained, the nonstop bad things we've had between us for months, to the point i havent been able to talk to you like normal anymore, because just seeing you pisses me off and everything you say/do will just piss me off. i cant help that. its not my fault. i cant just not split like that because we've had fucked up problems for months, that, guess what, shouldnt even be public here for all reasons ive already stated! but i also did it just because ive been deciding i need to get away from you for good, that i dont WANT to talk to you at all anymore. sucks to be treated the way you treat others right.

“ i posted on my twitter saying i wanted to drink and she instantly messaged me begging and spamming me not to “

and everything else like stalling, pressuring you etc. this is still. we talked about this. i said sorry. i got better about it. why do i have a callout.

[x] [x]

like this is literally all just trying to make me look bad in ways that i'm not. nice try, though!

“ when i cc’d bakugou and she tried to make me explain my trauma to make it Valid “

you're trying to make me look bad again. i was just asking because i was anxious wanted to know the reasoning for it and im sorry for pressing it at all but that doesnt mean i was trying to make you explain it so it could be "valid" shut the fuck up lol i even explained to you afterwards why it made me so uncomfortable and that it didnt bother me anymore, that i thought you were just blindly cc'ing him for no real reason like i just assumed it wasnt a coping thing or anything and thats my fault but??? youre trying to make me look bad for it so??? i'd even keep sending you fanart of him like.

[x]

“ she was extremely dependent on me and would spam me if i fell asleep before she woke up, she’d got upset and started splitting on me because i didn’t return her feelings of attraction. “

wat...

“ second, she’s blaming everything on her BPD and “not being able to help it,” or “can’t control herself” “

well, as you can clearly see, ive been anything but that??? but if you wanna keep telling yourself that, go ahead. have i said things LIKE that before? yes, when i was freaking out, over certain things i actually can't help, for example: abandonment trauma??? and like i said before: i need to try to not get so attached to people in the first place so that doesnt happen anymore! otherwise, should some sort of situation like that happen again, i can't handle getting that level of upset. so i prevent that by not getting that level of attached at all. like sorry but theres certain things nobody can help, even you. you're just trying to make it sound like this entire thing has been nothing but "i cant help it"

and lastly, we can't forget the fact that, for a long time, you wouldn't tell me anything. literally anything. i would repeatedly ask you. "what do i do that bothers you what am i doing wrong" etc and all you'd ever say was "idk" 95% of the time. i had absolutely no idea that for the longest time, i had been saying a lot of manipulative, shitty things and acting bad and etc, slash i had no idea that some of my episodes were actually affecting you that badly until way too late.

when you first told me that i had been acting so shitty, through a jpeg meme that was making fun of me, did i realize how awful i was being. i honest to god never had any idea and i explained this to you countless times. that i was  oblivious/i can be oblivious to shitl ike that and that i need you to tell me, otherwise I WONT KNOW.

nice meme. :) but yeah clearly this is still an accurate representation of me, right?

[x] [x]

yeah, you got me though. im a toxic, abusive piece of shit that will never get better, all i do is hurt others, i can't change, ive never apologized, ive never gotten better. totally

and since we're playing this game,

and now that i've said all this, i have nothing else to say. i can't make anyone believe me, but if you do, thanks.

[burnedhybrid]

please reblog | psa;

This is gonna be long so brace yourself, but if you’re in the RPing community especially the TVD, TO fandoms you’ll want to read on. Now, I'm not one to start or cause drama, but after some recent events I've felt the need to address a person who's not only continued to harass a friend and I but also try to emotionally manipulate us. 

This girl ran the dailydanielgillies blog and has many alias, her most recent name to go by is Amy but has been know as Piper, Yvonne & Holly according to @shitheardonline  (which is pretty much a blog dedicated to keeping the RPing community in the know about Amy and her whereabouts). I was following dailydanielgillies of course, to keep up with all things Daniel Gillies. After a few good weeks of following her I realized the blog contained more admin updates than anything Daniel Gillies related. The posts consisted of the admin getting upset every time Elijah (Daniels Character on The Originals) was hurt, or died or her favourite pairing wasn't together she would mouth off, get sad and threatened to delete the blog, threaten to harm herself or to hand the blog over to someone else.

I messaged her initially offering to take over the blog if she wanted to pass it along as she had previously stated. She asked me a few questions (if I had ran a fansite before,  how long I had been on Tumblr... etc) and I thought that was pretty standard and she gave off the impression that she was ready to hand it over to me but then she got quiet, didn’t correspond any further and the negative posts on her blog continued. That wasn’t fun for anyone, a lot of people have claimed it made them feel uncomfortable. After the three weeks had past and finally getting a hold of her, I could tell she didn’t want to part with the blog. That was fine, however her blog wasn’t giving me what I initially sought out for, so I told a friend, Ree, (@suitsofarmor) I was planning to make a Daniel Gillies fansite and she offered to help (Ree has huge admiration for Daniels work and knows a lot of info about him and his projects - so it was perfect)  So we started our own Daniel Gillies fansite under @thegilliesource.  10 hours into starting that blog (the template wasn’t complete or customised, we had about 3-6 followers by then) we both received messages from the Amy asking us why we didnt ask her permission to start that blog. My initial thoughts were ‘WTF?’ After doing some digging I realized she had posted on @dailydanielgillies  (gone now) our new link and then saying she was going to close the site because we made one. Bare in mind none of us made the blog to rival with hers, no one had bad intentions, we both just werent getting what we wanted from her blog and decided to create our own as a lot of her followers had voiced the same issues of not enjoying her admin posts. I woke up to messages from both her dailydanielgillies blog (which by then she had archived) and her inspirationromance RPing blog too. I have some screen shots of the messages she sent us as well as well as what she posted on dailydanielgillies (remember to read from the bottom of each screenshot upward):

She messaged me both on her RP blog and on  (inspirationromance) & dailydanielgillies to which the conversation went like this:

As I said the template wasn’t completed, no schedules were made and we had about 3-6 followers at the point so no one knew about us nor did they flock. 

Also may I add I found it amusing that she already knew the reasoning behind us not deciding to have her as a contributor.  She knew what she was doing already. PLUS she wasn’t entitled to the blog in any way shape or form.

I’m sorry. I found It funny because enemies sounded so dramatic. I felt like a kid in a playground and someone has just said they didnt want to be mates LOL I was confused like, what? I went along with it anyway.

Apparently not.

And I kept to my word. It was clear that as soon as I said something she’d take it way out of context or twist it and that upset me, so I cut ties.  I initially only responded to the messages from this account but I did get some from her RP one inspirationromance and after the Sunday and this previous conversation. I didnt respond. A couple of days after that she deleted that blog altogether - but didn’t forget to blame us first.

At first I didn’t know who inspirationromance was but after looking on her blog I came to find out it was her. Also she had left a really cute message for Ree and I, take a look and also yes, from then on out dailydanielgillies had been deleted which is why you wont find anything.

Yeah...

Than another few message to both me, Ree & @thegilliesource:

Funny that. She’s never mentioned RPing before.  We received an ask on thegilliesource, asking if we had stole dailydanielgillies to which Ree answered you can find here: https://thegilliesource.tumblr.com/post/160926607439/did-you-steal-dailydanielgillies-account

Some ex followers of Amy’s dailydanielgillies blog commented too:

The ‘lots of people’ she was pertaining to where in response to these comments. two.

Didn’t really matter though because she got a shiny new blog with a similar name shortly after called @gilliesgifsource (also deleted, she likes deleting things within a period of a few hours to a few days)

And she sent us this:

I wish I had more shots of her site because the similarity in text was ironic. Still, we never flagged it up with her.

She continued to message us every couple of days on our personal accounts or on thegilliesource. They were all ignored, and that seemed to annoy her more, but we didnt respond because we knew regardless, our voices wouldn’t be heard or respected. We had already tried to have a civil conversation and that wasn’t enough. She would also write about us on her RP blog and then tell us we were horrible people for not responding. This week I started RPing with someone new and realised their blog was made in the past 24 hours and they were a semi selective roleplayer, I realised she had made a starter with Amy and knowing emotional manipulation and abuse can be a trigger warning for people and knowing Amy had a preference for certain face claims... I didnt want this blog getting into something that could be emotionally harmful so early. So I explained that I didnt want to change their mind about RPing with Amy but I sent the RPer there to @shitheardonline, a blog that particularly talks about Amy and her antics online, and the RPer decided they didn’t want to go down that route.  After seeing that we were even mutuals Amy wrote this on her blog (but also blocked the new RPer due to us being mutuals BEFORE the new RPer even had the chance to block her, herself as the new RPer had already started to see the negative side of her)

What tipped me over the edge is when she sent thegilliesource this message:

I did nothing wrong. We did nothing wrong. @shitheardonline is a public site, everyone can grab that information themselves.  She also tweeted this:

Now I’m not one to play with a suicide threat. I have lost three real life friends this way, one being in the past couple of weeks. I treat the topic very sensitively. According to @shitheardonline there had been old accounts of her threatening suicide like this but just doing it to scare people.. And after reading her tweets that followed her tumblr posts and that message I made sure I reported her accounts to a Suicide watch. I wanted to make sure she was okay. Because all things aside it's clear she has a mental health issue (I have anxiety, depression and get severe panic attacks to the point where I pass out) So I know how scary and difficult it is. I get help for my mental health, but I feel as if she doesnt have that help or control over it, her emotions change erratically and I would hate for anyone to feel as if they have done something wrong especially when not even responding to someone.

She was offline for a day and came back with this post:

I’m not posting this long ass post to ‘out’ any one, or shame anyone. That’s never healthy. But I know that also the way she can treat people, take things out of context and react to things isnt healthy either, especially to those who are vulnerable and take things to heart. Messaging someone to say they are the cause of their suicide is intolerable. I was worried sick and for what? She was trying to scare me and it worked, which had bought back a flood of triggers from my childhood, but I choose not to be a victim to it at all and I would hate any of the community having to go through that too.   I’ve felt like I was doing something wrong or was in the wrong until my fiancé reminded me that hurt people, hurt people - But that doesn't make it justifiable. To get the message out and protect  others too. I’m writing this post as a psa if anyone is looking to steer clear of Tumblr drama or want to avoid triggers like like suicide, emotional abuse and manipulation. She has a tendency to post and then delete, so that’s why I’ve been taking screenshots, so going on those pages they may have posts missing - this isn't out of the ordinary.  All info I shared are online and public and can be publically shared. The reason I’m sharing  screenshots of PMs is because I want everyone to see that I’m not making this up and/or I’m not lying. Because Amy has called me that. On several accounts. BTW within the last 24 hours she’s also changed her URL from @inspirationromance to @theheartofromance, then to @characterarchiving. I woke up this morning to a notification of a follow/unfollow from phoebegillies. After inspecting the account  and realising the rest had been deleted (including gilliesgifsource) I’ve realised she signed up with a new email (because she was blocked on the other accounts too so she couldn’t have followed me.) So she’s deliberately come and found me again to follow me then unfollow me. It was like a little dig at me. So I blocked her. If you choose to do the same its: http://www.phoebegillies.tumblr.com URL changes and account changes arent uncommon either. Bare in mind. I still haven’t responded to her since. She’s now harassing me by constantly reaching out despite my efforts to stop her. If you’re interested in more info about her you can find it on @shitheardonline That blogs over a year old and Amys history has been tracked that far. There you can find a list of aliases she’s used over the years as well as URLs she been under, horrible tweets she’s sent out and tagged TO writers in etc...

As of today (the 31st of May) she’s also made her Twitter account private so I’m glad I screen shotted what I could when I had the chance. I wish this girl the best and hope she gets the helps she needs, but its not okay to point the finger, victimise, harass and manipulate people online. And I want all of us to stay safe. Please reblog this so others can know. Take Care, Jolie x

[datingadviceonreddit]

I [F 21] met this guy from subtle Asian dating, a Facebook group. He [M 21] had an auction post and I saw his pictures and without even reading his auction, I followed his Instagram. I thought nothing of it because I usually do this and sometimes the guys follow me back. But this guy in particular followed me back and DMd me and the first thing he said was “did you follow me from SAD because I think you’re absolutely gorgeous”. HE was the one who was auctioned and HE’S sliding into MY DMs. I was so surprised because of all the other girls who were following him and DMing him from his auction, he chose me. We hit it off immediately and this normally doesn’t happen. We talked for the next few hours until 3am. After a day or 2 we started FaceTiming each other. After that he dropped all the other girls for me and I believed him because he sent screenshots. He also told his friend to edit his auction post to say that he’s off the market because he’s focusing on someone at the moment. I felt like I won the bachelor. We continued talking and we reciprocated everything like what we wanted in the future, how many kids, etc. I know it was insanely early cause we’d only started talking a few days, but it felt right. It felt like I had found my person. He told me that I would be the first person he says “I love you” to romantically. But of course with the coronavirus and lockdown, we couldn’t meet in person. He was very confident that if he caught the virus, he’d survive it. He also lives with other students, so he wasn’t particularly concerned about getting the virus because he thinks he’s not living with anyone who’s at high risk. He really wanted to meet up and go on dates already but lockdowns kept getting extended and he was becoming impatient. But we kept making plans for after quarantine. For me I thought after quarantine meant after it was safe for me to go out without risking my family’s health, but I think for him he meant after the lockdown was lifted. But a month and a half after we start talking, I brought up that we might have to wait until a vaccine for the coronavirus comes out before we can meet and he switched up. He got mad and said he had to rethink things. He knows I live with family and how all of them are at high risk if they were infected with the virus. He said he wasn’t gonna wait for what would be a year until a vaccine came out and I told him I wasn’t going to ask him to wait. I didn’t understand what the urgency to go on a date first was if he kept telling me that things were going so well with us despite not having met yet. I understand the uncertainty, but after all the stuff he said about me being the one he wants to make his girlfriend and eventually marry and have children with (I know, sounds ridiculous because we’d never met and it’s only been just over a month) but it felt so right. We had an argument about how he said it wouldn’t be fair to him to wait for a first date when everyone else is already allowed to go outside. I argued that even though lockdown is going to be lifted soon and people are going out, doesnt mean it’s safe. Lockdown is being lifted because of protestors but doctors and nurses are still urging people to stay at home. I tried to offer a more optimistic scenario like how we could maybe wait a little longer when new regulations come out so it would be safer and he accused me of gaslighting saying it switching up my words. Our argument turned out so bad with no understanding from either ends and we just started attacking each other instead of the problem. Midway thru the argument, we decided that it wasn’t gonna workout after all and he ended up blocking me from everything. It was so messy, but I miss him. I really thought he would be my person. Should I try texting him? via /r/dating_advice