#i have no idea what the foursome shiptag is tho

[lassieposting]

Amenadiel/Eve/Linda/Maze for the Domestic Ship meme, please.

domestic ship meme!

send me a ship and i’ll tell you:

who reaches out to new neighbors

they either get a visit from eve, or ambushed by maze. eve is like. a labrador. she’s the friendliest person alive. she’ll make like a casserole or something to take over when she sees the moving van, so they don’t have to worry too much about unpacking everything. if they have kids, she’ll offer to watch them. if they have a dog, she wants to pet it. eve sees the entire community as her community. maze on the other hand will just straight up interrogate the newbies on the drive. she’s more territorial than lucifer, but she’s a lot less subtle about it; the meeting usually concludes with either an “i like you” or a “you won’t last long”. 

who remembers to buy healthy food

amenadiel. he sees looking after his humans as a solemn responsibility. he has memorised the amount of each vitamin humans need. how much lean meat they’re supposed to have a week. the exact ingredients needed for maximum human health. and he makes sure they get it every day. he packs healthy lunches for linda once she goes back to work. 

who remembers to buy junk food

maze. she doesn’t have the same nutrition requirements as the humans, and she doesn’t have lucifer’s appreciation for fine dining, so a lot of the time she lives on a diet of junk, vodka and more junk. 

who fixes the oven when it breaks

they all suck so much at DIY. amenadiel doesn’t even know how modern technology works. he’s just about figured out texting. eve embraces it wholeheartedly but still refers to it as “magic”. maze is a huge fan of the “hit it with a hammer and see if that helps” school of adulting. and linda would rather just call someone out to deal with it; she’s too dainty and elegant for that nonsense. 

who waters the plants/feeds their pet(s)

eve is a huge pet person and very green-fingered. she spent her first lifetime growing food in eden, after all. she’s the type to have a little herb garden and grow her own tomatoes. 

who wakes up earlier

amenadiel - he likes how quiet the suburbs are before anyone else is awake. sometimes he likes to go for a quick flight around the block while the rest of the world is still asleep, stretch his wings. there are lots of things he doesn’t miss about being an angel - that is, an angelic angel, one that actually lives in the silver city - but he does miss being able to fly whenever he wants. 

who makes the bed

linda. she thinks an organised environment helps keep an organised mind. she’s not a ‘showhome’ kind of person in the way lucifer is, but she likes the little rituals of keeping her personal space clean. it’s the time she takes to ‘therapy’ herself; put her feelings in order and deal with any internal crises she might be having. 

who makes the coffee

amenadiel. he likes the little human rituals, and he’s got the best memory so he only ever had to ask once how everyone likes their preferred hot drink.  

who burns breakfast

maze. it is a fact universally acknowledged that Mazikeen Cannot Cook. she keeps trying though, because she refuses to be outdone by amenadiel in the Effort Made To Make Life Easier For Linda stakes. given that her diet pre-Earth consisted mostly of charred meat and fungus, it’s understandable that her cooking sucks; she knows one way to make food safe to consume and that is to turn it to charcoal. 

how do they let each other know they’re leaving the house

amenadiel goes around giving kisses on the cheek because he’s learned that’s how human lovers say goodbye. linda does the same, because that’s who he’s picked it up from. eve leaves cute little notes letting everyone know what time she’ll be back. maze stands by the front door and yells see ya, bitches. 

how do they greet each other when one of them gets home

everyone knows when maze gets back, because she just sort of slams the door open and it bounces off the wall. they’re working on her indoors manners. charlie, as a half-angel, can sense whenever amenadiel is close to him and will start reaching for the door and babbling for daddy. (he also does this with lucifer, and it freaks luci the fuck out)  

who brings home little gifts like flowers/chocolates more often

eve. she’s like a little magpie. whenever she sees something she thinks someone she cares about would like, she has to bring it home for them. sometimes it’s a tropical musk candle. sometimes it’s anal beads. it’s a toss-up. 

who picks the movie for movie night

charlie. everyone picks out whatever they want to watch, then they all call to him and see who he crawls to. whoever gets the baby first gets to put on their movie. it’s not the most sensible system, but given that two of the family are Not Human it’s saved a lot of bickering. 

their favorite kind of movie to watch

amenadiel is a sucker for tearjerkers that show off the great human capacity for love; things like a dog’s purpose or my sister’s keeper. he’ll curl up holding linda/a cushion/eve and have a good therapeutic cry. maze has no tolerance for that touchy-feely bullshit, but she’ll watch those movies quite happily. she thinks they’re funny. 

linda likes a simple feel-good comedy that’s a bit dirtier than you’d expect her to enjoy - think bridesmaids or we’re the millers. she likes something she can have a good cackle at, but doesn’t tax her brain too much. her job’s high stress and she needs to wind down and do something mindless for a bit. 

eve likes teen dramas/coming-of-age stories, because that’s just sort of where she’s at in life. think st trinians or wild child. she gets super invested in the characters she projects on most and their happy ending. 

maze likes horror films. she likes to point out all the ways they’re inaccurate; the exorcism isn’t set up properly, the latin chant is pronounced wrong, here’s what would actually happen if you cut off someone’s head with a chainsaw. she’d pick out things like final destination and nightmare on elm street. 

who first suggests a pillow fort

maze. trixie insists that it’s an important tradition for every human child, so maze is insistent that they do it for charlie. she’s a little disappointed when linda points out that charlie is only a baby and won’t appreciate a well-built pillow fort for a few years yet, but she lets it drop. then lucifer mentions that his humans built one and he got fucked in it, so she starts bringing it up again. he’s not allowed to have a sexual experience she hasn’t had too. 

who builds the pillow fort

they all join in. linda and eve actually put it together, amenadiel is in charge of filling it with blankets and pillows, and maze “camouflages” it as well as she can (not very well. linda’s living room is not set up for that kind of thing, but it’s instinct and she tries). 

who tries to distract the other during the movie

maze. she’s super horny for all three of them, she doesn’t stand a chance. eve is also pretty bad for this. 

who falls asleep first

whoever’s most tired, often linda - she’s the one with the full-time job and the very young baby. she and eve sleep pretty peacefully though. maze has spent her whole life in hell, where she and lucifer had to trade off keeping watch while the other slept, and she’s been edgy since goddess and then pierce almost killed linda. amenadiel, who needs the least sleep to function, will take pity and keep an eye out while maze gets her head down. 

who is big spoon/little spoon

amenadiel gives great hugs and has Those ArmsTM so he’s generally a big spoon. maze is mostly a big spoon, but she’ll let eve hold her. linda and eve are both little spoons.