#i have characterized and crafted characters which are NOT how they're characterized in the books so

[yourdandelionofthedeathknell]

The Theraprism: Good or bad?

Ya know, i've never been sure how to feel on the Theraprism, as shown in the Book of Bill. This is in large part because we get very little info on it, from any perspective other then BIll's own at least (and he is...Not a reliable narrator). Personally, I see three possible interpretations and I don't know which one is correct. To be clear, I think all of these are fairly valid: 1. Their methods seem insipid, but are actually quite effective. They seem to have been effective in the past (one of Bill's fellow patients is slated for release in the near-future apparently), and the Axolotl (who, while not exactly rich characterization himself, has, generally, been portrayed as wise and benevolent) referred to it as "what [Bill] needs the most", which would be weird if it doesn't have SOME merit. I, myself, honestly prefer this one, because I think it works better with the narrative of the Book of Bill (a book which, generally, does not encourage the reader to sympathize with Bill's plight. Pity, maybe, but the framing is very clearly that he kinda deserves this) and the schadenfreude the reader is encouraged to feel if Bill's hellish afterlife is, largely if not entirely, a self-inflicted one: That it wouldn't be particularly bad if not for his own combo of being unable to accept that he lost, that he shouldn't be allowed to do whatever he wants whenever he wants to anyone he wants, inability to form meaningful bonds with others, and, most of all, his total inability to admit to being wrong. He COULD leave at any time, if he would just actually repent, but...He's Bill, so...He won't. It just works best for me if his hell is largely self-inflicted. 2. They are harmful, possibly deliberately. This does have a fair bit of support textually. Mandatory therapy is already a pretty major ethical grey area at best (a major tenant of modern psychotherapy is that you can't make someone change unless they take the first step), they definitely engage in toxic positivity, and, of course, the "Solitary Wellness Void" is...Solitary confinement, which is a practice most modern medical institutions oppose and consider to be psychological torture. So, fair bit of support for this. 3. This is what I think was probably Alex's intent: They're a bunch of oblivious obnoxiously happy morons (as Bill himself would probably describe them) whose attempts to treat eons-old eldritch horror bad guys with puppet shows and arts and crafts is meant to be amusingly-inept rather then actively malicious, and whose effectiveness (such as it is) is down to having literally eternity to try. Kinda like what Mabel might do to rehabilitate someone. To use an analogy, think Charlie Morningstar from Hazbin, at least in the first couple episodes, where the fact that she's treating adult criminals like misbehaving children is the joke and is meant to indicate incompetence rather than malice. I get that isn't that much different from the proceeding (except in terms of "how seriously are we supposed to take this"), but still. I think all three of these have support, and, to be clear, I go with the first one not because I think it's the most supported (might be the least), but because it jives most with how I think about BIll's narrative IE as a character we're meant to, at best, pity, but not really sympathize with. I think the intent is "Bill is suffering a karmic self-inflicted punishment after all the pain and suffering he's caused", not "Bill is being medically abused and we should feel bad for him". The Book of Bill does invite readers to sympathize with Bill occasionally, but mostly past Bill, not current Bill. All viewpoints are valid, this is just trying to organized some thoughts on the subject. I sincerely hope I haven't said anything harmful here. Uh, cards on the table, I am neurodivergent, but i've never had therapy, forcefully or otherwise (although I did have an irrational fear of the possibility of institutionalization for a bit), so i'm sorta going off vibes here, sorry to say. If I said anything insensitive here, I apologize.

[hotdaemondtargaryen]

PHIA SABAN INTERVIEWED BY THE WRAP MAGAZINE.

IN THE FINALE, ALICENT PROPOSES TO HELAENA TO LEAVE KING'S LANDING AND SHE ASKS, 'WHERE WOULD I GO?' BEFORE THEY'RE INTERRUPTED BY AEMOND. WHAT DOES HELAENA MAKE OF ALICENT'S PROPOSAL?

I don’t think Helaena has really seen any evidence of a life that she’s like 'That’s the type of life I want to live.'

"And as a result of that, she’s created a world for herself where she can feel safe and that’s about this tiny world of insects and this small beauty and this kind of non-political interest in something outside of herself."

"I think that she’s genuinely bemused at the idea that there is somewhere else to go, and maybe part of that is that she has a maturity in knowing that we couldn’t go anywhere to escape what’s going to happen."

But I think more literally, it’s like 'I’ve never been anywhere else, so where would we go?'

HELAENA RESISTS FIGHTING BUT SEEMS WILLING TO DO A LOT TO ESCAPE THE WAR. WHERE DO HELAENA'S LOYALTIES LIE? COULD SHE SIMILARLY BE PERSUADED TO HELP TEAM BLACK?

"I think she’s loyal to her mum."

"A big aspect of Helaena is that she hasn’t historically engaged with the politics and, in a way, she has more of a macro view of it, where she she can’t really connect with this thing, which seems a bit ridiculous to her about like sides and ego and killing."

"I don’t know if she would see it like that."

"She would definitely go where her mom goes, but I don’t think she’s got a political view on it particularly."

THE CONFRONTATION BETWEEN HELAENA AND AEMOND IS REALLY INTENSE AS SHE REVEALS HIS FATE TO HIM. WHY DO YOU THINK SHE CHOSE TO LET HIM HAVE IT AND REVEAL HER CARDS?

"That moment is the first time she knows it in that language that she can express."

"The way I see it, her dreams and her visions up to that point are very much really strong intuitions, or really strong feelings or an experience of the world."

Where she’s like, 'why does my mind keep hooking on this?' but it’s never been in that extremely ice-clear way.

"Aemond, essentially, after everything she’s gone through, has pushed too hard on this."

And she thinks, 'you need me to come with you to kill people on my dragon, after everything I’ve gone through, after the grief that I’m in and for what.'

"And in that moment, it’s very clear to her that not only do I not want to do that, but I know wholeheartedly that it won’t change anything, because the path is set."

"It becomes about … what does she hope for? What is she living for? And that’s a big question for me next season."

DOES HELAENA HAVE ANY LOYALTY LEFT FOR AEGON?

"I think it’s tricky."

"What’s very complicated about those relationships with those siblings is that there is love and I think she does feel love — wherever in the scale you’d like to place it — towards her family."

HELAENA APPEARS IN DAEMON'S VISION, BUT IT'S UNCLEAR IF SHE'S EXPERIENCING THE PROPHECY FOR THE FIRST TIME OR IF IT WAS HER DOING TO SHOW UP. WHAT WAS YOUR READ ON IT?

"It’s really up to the audience’s interpretation, because I think there’s infinite possibilities of what’s going on there."

There’s a reality where she’s like, 'Oh, someone else is in the dream world I’m going to wander on through.'

"And then I think there’s also an option where she’s a projection of Daemon’s guilt or something, and it’s not really about her."

"I think there’s an option where they’re all like seeing it for the first time."

"There’s so many options, but I like that that’s left up to the audience."

HELAENA HAS A MORE EXPANDED ROLE THIS SEASON, AND THE CHARACTER IS DEEPENED FROM THE BOOKS AS A SEER. WHEN DID YOU FIND OUT SHE WOULD HAVE A BIGGER PART THIS SEASON AND HOW DID YOU WORK WITH RYAN AND THE TEAM TO CRAFT HOW HELAENA'S POWERS INFORM WHO SHE IS?

"It was something we spoke about when I got cast in Season 1, because it was definitely part of the characterization very early on — that she has this ability, or these really strong intuitions and feelings."

"But they really left it up to me as to how that manifested … and I’ve just had lots of fun with the idea that it’s quite uncomfortable for her, and it’s these intuitions and these instincts that she actually tries really hard to kind of repress, because it’s uncomfortable; it exacerbates the difference between her and her family, because she doesn’t feel brave in how clearly she can communicate them."

"What’s been fun this season for me to work out is what does it take for her to step in and actually inhabit that, and have a clearer line and relationship with that dreaming side of her."

"I think that her trauma and her stepping away from the real world and disassociating has actually made her relationship to dreaming more powerful."

WE STARTED SEEING MORE OF HELAENA'S CHARACTER AFTER THE TERRIBLE BLOOD AND CHEESE SEQUENCE IN THE PREMIERE EPISODE. HOW DOES THIS TRAGEDY SHAPE HER TRAJECTORY FOR THE REST OF THE SEASON?

"She’s really sad, so that shapes it in a way."

"There’s all of this evidence in the show of this heroism, and there’s people getting on their dragons and battling and the politics of it all."

"But what I think about Helaena is that it’s a small heroism, which is essentially getting through the worst-case scenario and carrying on living every day in the same situation where she feels trapped."

"And also a self-exploration, because I think Helaena has seen what this system has done to Alicent, her mum, and there starts to be a thing between them."

Which is like, 'How much of this can we actually repeat again, and how much of this can we go through? For what?'

"In a very small, heroic way, she kind of actually manages, against the odds, to empower herself through her grief."

"But it doesn’t mean she’s happy."

"It just means that she is trying to find hope and get through it when actually it’s pretty hopeless."

WHERE DO YOU HOPE HELAENA'S STORYLINE GOES FROM HERE?

"I hope for more bugs."

"In my fantasy, Helaena is going to connect with Alys Rivers in some way."

"I’d love that."

"I really want to go to Harrenhal, but I don’t really see that happening."

"I would love to be in the scenes with more of the cast, and that’s what I’d really like to get — some of those dynamics, and hopefully a lot more of Olivia as well, which is what I was very lucky to have this season."

HAVE YOU DISCUSSED HELAENA AND ALYS MEETING UP?

"Gayle [Rankin] and I would both be really keen on that."

"I think we feel connected in some way anyway, so we definitely have that, but we’d like it to be literal."

"Who knows? We would definitely enjoy it."

[lemonhemlock]

Adding to your nuanced discussion regarding Sara Hess. Although I have no personal vendetta against her orientation like some of these unhinged freaks, and can fully acknowledge her merit as a screenwriter when working within her area of expertise, I must admit that on the other hand, her bias against certain characters is sort of off-putting. The interviews that she did explaining her thoughts and feelings about Daemon (a character I personally dislike) as well as the decision (whether it was hers or not) to make Aegon the Elder a rapist, did have an effect on how I view her relationship to ASOIAF. The "civilians don't count" comment reeked of such flippancy that it only furthered my skepticism. I don't know that I would call it "unprofessional" but it does make me annoyed in the same manner I would be whenever engaging with a work of fiction wherein the author clearly hates a character and goes out of their way to paint them in a negative light. It's even worse when you remember that these are GRRM's characters and however limited their descriptions may be in Fire & Blood, it still requires a level of maturity to put aside one's own biases in favor of keeping their characterization consistent. Am I being too harsh? Does this even make any sense? Feel free to critique.

It is genuinely so annoying when you can sense authorial bias emanating through the text, whether positive or negative, and it betrays an immaturity of craft. I have to take my hat off to GRRM here, because, as annoying as his boner for Daemon is, he does give Daemon plenty of unsavory traits and does narratively punish him. Not once in Fire & Blood is the reader invited to consider how poor Daemon was just a misunderstood scapegoat and never deserved the things that happened to him.

Considering Daemon as a whole, I think it's fair to say he is the type of character that GRRM wrote out of self-indulgence and just because he thought him >cool<. Which is honestly fair game - he is a secondary character in a background story and has no true bearing on the main series. I think he is allowed a little fanboyish service to his own preferences in a whole saga that spans thousands of pages.

However, when you make it the main story, you have to take a little care so that your biases don't make the end product look like wish fulfillment fanfiction. And, for all their posturing that Daemon is not a good person and how shocked they are he has so many fans, both Sara Hess and Ryan Condal have never given Daemon the same treatment they've reserved for the greens. Daemon is whitewashed in the show compared to his book!counterpart and, even when he pulls his fair share of shit, he never gets punished in the same way Alicent, Aemond or Aegon do (and for far less grievous crimes, too).

What consequences does Daemon face exactly at the end of Season 2? He's spent the entire season trying to mount an alternative claim to the throne to Rhaenyra, yet she immediately takes him back when they reunite. They made Blood & Cheese a misunderstanding to make him less culpable, even had Helaena guide him in a vision. Even Alys Rivers is just trying to help him get on the right path. They nerfed Nettles, so, unless they'll turn Rhaena into his mistress in Season 3 (which they don't have the balls for), they've pretty much removed any source of conflict between him and Rhaenyra. He'll go to his death secure in his marriage and fighting for >the greater good<, whereas the greens have had their family unit completely disintegrated with nonsensical narrative choices.

I just fail to see how that is balanced. How that is a "both sides = bad" narrative. The favouritism is so blatant; they're not even trying. If this were a Disney spin-off, no one would care to criticise such blatant bias, but Ryan and Sara are out there pretending they're making prestige television.

[mumblingsage]

Semi-baked thought but recently I have read 3 different professionally published gay romances that were...fine...some more satisfying than others, but what stuck out to me was the extent to which the characterization and dialogue lacked surprises. A bi guy in an M/M romance recommendation thread on reddit pointed out the extent to which published romances gravitate toward a particular flavor of feminine man paired with a particular flavor of masculine man and it's hard not to keep seeing once it's pointed out. In each of the three books the more 'masculine' guy was bisexual. I love bisexuals (it's self-love), I love characters with differing relationships to their gender, but I'm also fighting down thoughts of a drinking game.

It's not the exact same flavor as the original Fandom Ghost but it is a Ghost. [And specific enough that it is a Ghost, not an archetype.]

Perhaps the bigger lacking-surprises issue is a craft one where everyone just Says What They Mean too often, and in rather bland ways. I don't mind the occasional revelation of Truth from the Heart; I am reading romance! But how you do it matters, points can be won for style; there's a low quotability quotient and less satisfaction because, again, it's romance, we know they're going to communicate these particular ideas, we're here to be charmed and surprised by how they do it. (In parallel to the romances, I'm reading Robin Hobb's character-driven fantasy novels, and one thing I will say for her, the characters' dialogue + narrative is a firehose of surprises in a way that often reads as more truly romantic.)

If this was fanfiction of my Blorbos I would be more easily satisfied, or perhaps the generic-ness would be less noticeable because I'd be backfilling richer details from canon. When it's happening to original characters, it leaves a feeling of dissatisfaction.

There's also a thing where the side characters root for the relationship in rather flat/uninteresting ways; I'm willing to admit some of this is Just Me having a higher angst preference than the target audience, but at the same time I've read older romances (old enough that they're standardly heterosexual) which, for all their myriad other sins, give side characters much richer and more complex emotional affects and roles. And I think some of it is approach/style more than content: if I summarize various side characters, they sound perfectly interesting, but on the page they fall flat because they just Say What They Mean in polite and generic ways. [This a flaw that annoys me in fanfiction too. Once you've read enough, you already know what they're going to say, usually, but you want the way they say it to make some impression. "Say" can be broadly construed to include body language and symbolic action - my kingdom for an extravagant gesture.]

[altraviolet]

Have you read any articles/books or watched any videos/lectures on writing that you found helpful/enjoyed?

There are some recs in this post here. Scroll down to RESOURCES. Since writing that post, I've found more videos and channels. I didn't bookmark them, so I'd have to go hunt and find them. There are also various video recs in my main list of Writing Advice, my pinned post.

I have a mental list of "writing advice posts to make" and an updated resources post is definitely on there :)

The most interesting and entertaining channel I've found in the interim is a script writer, LocalScriptMan. His ideas are really fascinating. He has a bare-bones approach, which makes sense because he doesn't write novels. But you can learn a lot from his craft videos. (YMMV on the enneagram stuff. I find it very interesting but I can't align my brain to those specific characterization divisions) For starters check out "What if character sheets weren't awful." I really enjoy his stuff.

TheCozyCreative is also a really nice channel, highly rec. Trad and self published author talks about all aspects of publishing, the realities of being self employed as a writer (emphasis on frugal living to make that happen), and assorted cozy stuff.

This post got long so gonna put a lil jump here

Most of the videos I've watched recently have been about the publishing industry and editing. I donnnnnnn't know if those would be particularly helpful for fic writing. I mean, editing absolutely should be done, but we're talking Developmental Editing type things, which most fic writers probably don't do... hmm

Know what, let's just go with it xD Please forgive me, I'm too tired to get all the links, but here are some videos I've taken notes on. I have a notebook I take notes in, divided by subject. I'mma just give you the info in my notebook. these are youtube videos, format is:

"video title" channel name

BACKSTORY

"How to write character backstory" Abbie Emmons

BACKSTORY/FLASHBACK

"On Writing: Flashbacks and Backstory" Hello Future Me

CHARACTER MOTIVATIONS

"Oops no soul: the biggest Paradox" LocalScriptMan

CONSISTENCY

"how to be consistent with your creative projects" Megan Brush

EDITING (DEVELOPMENTAL)

"Everything you need to know about developmental editing" Alyssa Matesic

"How to self edit like a developmental editor" Writehive

EDITING (STYLESHEET)

"Stylesheet | Why you need a stylesheet | editing tips" Autumn Bardot

EDITING

"40 words to cut from your novel" Natalia Leigh

REDEMPTION ARCS

"On Writing: Redemption Arcs!" Hello Future Me

SELF PUBLISHING

"My 7 biggest self publishing mistakes: what I learned" The Cozy Creative

SLOW BURN

"How to write slow burn romance... that will make your readers fall in love" Abbie Emmons

STORYTELLING

"The key to great storytelling" Quotidian Writer. I mention Quotidian Writer in the older post I linked above, and I hiiiiighly rec her vidoes. They're really good.

SUBTEXT

"Writing subtext in dialogue" Quotidian Writer. hoo boy do I rec this video. did you like the dialogue in TEG? watch this video :D

--

Alrighty hopefully that's a good start :) Though it's totally possible most of these aren't helpful to you. Do you have specific questions about writing? If so, I can try to find videos for you.

If you're looking for broad advice, def check out the channels in the post above, as well as LocalScriptMan, TheCozyCreative, and def check out Quotidian Writer.

[volkswagonblues]

JEJSJDAH HI making myself known is actually terrifying #socialanxietywhooop but here we go

I JUST FINISHED READING FIREBENDER'S GUIDE + DELETED SCENES AND OH. MY. LORD. quite literally obsessed I'm sitting here at work zoning out because it has left such an impact on me...where do I even start?

okay so I recently got back into atla because well I just started feeling so nostalgic?? and a zukka spiral later led me to your fic (one of my favorite jujutsu kaisen authors had your fic bookmarked. I knew I had to do it.) and well!!

the characterization. I'm absolutely obsessed. the way you wrote sokka as a cherry dude but he still has issues!! the depiction of said issues. zuko as he tries and tries so hard to do better even when he fails...personal favorite scene that made me giggle was when he ran back to apologize to li and lo btw cackled out loud on public transportation

but I guess what I'm trying to say is that firebender's guide, to me, feels like a really good depiction of how startlingly flawed and human we all are. like. not inherently bad but not all good, because no one is ever all good. it feels like such a good character study of zuko and all that he is since realizing only he can regain his own honor. it's just...how do I even express how lovely and raw and real it is in the best way?

AND THE WAY YOU WROTE ZUKKA. giggles. they're so!! even when they're mad at each other they have. a certain understanding. it's expanding on what we know about canon so beautifully. the gentle way sokka loves zuko while being mean enough about it because zuko just needs a little push when it comes to certain things. the desperate way zuko needs sokka but realizes that it can be gentle and fond. just. [incoherent screaming] THE WAY YOU WRITE YEARNING OHHHHH. MY.

and that's not even covering the wonderful way the plot took me for a ride. it was so beautifully crafted. I wish I could be you :") I was just as immersed in the larger plot as I was with the zukka dynamic. the worldbuilding ahdhajdj I respect SERIOUSLY respect the amount of research and dedication you put into this fic. genuinely. it all came together to craft such a beautiful picture and I'm HERE FOR IT!

anyhow. concluding what essentially became a rant. tysm for blessing the world with this fic 🙏

Hey! okay, sorry this has been sitting in my inbox for a week because it's such a lovely message and I'm so touched that someone is reaching out to me about this fic. It was my first proper, completed, novel-length fic and I wrote it during COVID lockdown when I like, jobless with no outlet at all for my mental energy.

The process of writing the fic taught me a lot about plotting--I went the screenwriter's route and used the Save the Cat beat sheet (you can google it, it's basically a screenwriter's tool for plotting out movies, which is a medium that doesn't take shaggy and meandering very well. There's an excel version for novelists here: Elizabeth Davis’s Save the Cat Beat Sheet Spreadsheet for Novels)

I didn't read this book back then, but a book that really helps with worldbuilding is John Truby's The Anatomy of Story. I think some of the best books on plotting and storytelling are done by screenwriters.

And about the fic in general--ATLA is such a beautiful show and the zukka summer of 2020 was SUCH a crazy time because everyone was so desperate for a mental escape, I'm happy it still holds up!! I love both characters. I love thinking through the moral implications of the history in ATLA's worldbuilding and playing with the fantasy rules of that universe. Thanks so much for reading and thanks so much for brightening my day by telling me about it <3

[dailycass-cain]

I was a masochist, because I wanted to see how the story ended (and wanted a the very least to own the Red Hood mini because I do love the creative team with that). So I asked a friend if I could borrow his copies of the issues I don't have. So here are my hopefully FINAL thoughts on Batman/Catwoman: Gotham War.

This was quite possibly the worst Batman x-over in quite some time. From the varying motivations of the main characters to the side characters. Nothing stood out from the beginning to the end.

If any one character comes off as "okay" throughout this event is Jason. Like, he gets the only motivation (again thin as it is), but at the very least he's the one who gets progression in this story.

From helping Selina to seeing how flawed Selina's plan is, to being kidnapped by Bruce then mentally tortured, and still fighting even after it.

Jason is the ONLY main member of the three (or four if you include Vandal) who exits the story still looking clean.

Bruce or Selina? Oh boy... both have some WONKY stuff in this and vary from issue to issue or page to page.

The thing is, this story could've just been easier by taking Selina out entirely and focusing on Bruce vs. the Bat Family.

Like, the entire Bat Family is paper thin in this story and quite possibly some of the worst use of them in a while.

I'm still flabbergasted at how awful Cass was treated in the story with zero character at all. I mean Batman vs. Robin #5 did as well, but even with that story there was a "meaning" to the madness with Cass in that.

She sat out most the main series until THAT issue. She's there along with the rest of the Bat Family to stall the possessed Bruce (which seems to be a recurring theme this entire year) until the mystical characters of the DCU arrive to exorcise him.

For that issue?

It works. I accept the jobbing because it's a mystical demon which is outside her norm (well not anymore).

I still have my issues with Batman vs. Robin, but it was waaay better at telling a story.

Here?

Everyone's appearance in this event is downright laughable and makes zero sense. I'm supposed to accept Cass is okay with Selina's plan throughout this? Even her among other characters gets ZERO voice on why they're on board with this.

A quick fix again would've been when she saw the signs of Bruce's mental instability with the Zur influence growing larger.

Heck, the now INFAMOUS Batman #137. The issue is awful storywise and all it serves is the wrestling equivalent to this with Bruce vs. Cass:

All so Bruce can get a "W" over Cass. Joy. 🙄

When themactically it could've shown Zur's influence that a move Bruce wouldn't be ready for and Zur is.

BUT NOPE. We get that with him against Dick in #138 instead.

I'm not even going into details with the final issue of the event in Batman/Catwoman: Gotham War- Scorched Earth #1.

It just makes everything worse. Bruce passes it all on Dick and um yeah… none of the female characters of the family get ANY say. 🙃🙃🙃

I said last month I'm dropping Batman ongoing from my pull, and I'm sticking with that choice with Tec replacing it fully. I just don't enjoy the comic any longer. When you don't enjoy a comic you cut it off and don't continue to read it for any enjoyment purposes.

Literally, Cass's entire point in Batman run so far has been to job. There has been ZERO characterization for the character. Why I dibbed Cass in this "Card Cain". If you're gonna treat the character that way, well.

I'm out.

Detective Comics is giving me a better story of Bruce falling out mentally, and better-crafted antagonists who feel like a threat to him and others.

I'm more hype for Cass in that because it feels like the book treats each character better. EVERYONE gets to shine.

Batman/Catwoman: Gotham War burned me the heck out of the two leads. Again, I'm far more interested in what happens with Jason next and glad his "mini-series" basically turned into a setup for the finale to the current Joker: The Man Who Stopped Laughing ongoing.

Now if you'll excuse me I'm going to put my friend's copies downstairs. Probably tell him next Thurs to bury them in his bins never to be read, or just sell this as a bundle for some poor soul to buy.

I hope this is the final time I ever talk about Batman/Catwoman: Gotham War.

Save for Card Cain. I can't hate Card Cain.

[mcalhenwrites]

I don't know if I can express how much it means to me that people like my writing. How much that is actively healing me and bringing me the confidence in my writing that I lacked for so long. Which I know doesn't make it sound genuine, but when you've heard negative criticisms for so long, it's hard to believe the ones who counter that. I was told for years to have confidence in my writing, and I just couldn't find it. Some of those same people told me to have confidence, but then they'd also make fun of my writing/characters (or characterization for fanfics), they'd defend their friends for insulting me, they never cared about boosting my works when I posted them but cornered me if I hadn't immediately seen what they posted of their own writing, just plain ignoring me unless I could benefit them with crochet patterns/reading their stories/etc. (Some of these things overlapped.) I would spend most of my day working on my writing or reading books, and people would say, "You're not even trying hard enough to get better." (How many of them immediately ditched me when I said I wasn't going to crochet anymore so I could focus on writing? Heh. The number isn't zero, that's for sure. Note to anyone who does crafts: don't become that person known for gifts and be cautious about how often and who you gift pieces to...) I'm moving away from that level of damage. I feel a lot better about my writing. I don't feel as much shame about what I write, how I write, and why I write. There are people out here supporting me. They're buying my published books! I'm finding so much joy now. I will go on r/AO3 and just start upvoting all the celebration posts bc they make me happy. (Highly recommend doing this btw) Anyhow, this is a big thank you to all the people who have supported me, whether it's on Ko-Fi, Patreon, buying my book, leaving comments on AO3, sending asks, etc. (Links can be found easily by looking at my blog, but I wanna get back on topic.) I write dark, heavy content, and my intention is to break hearts or make people think. I'm getting feedback now that I do exactly that, and I'm finally feeling prouder and prouder of myself. People say that you can't find real confidence if you base it on what others think, but honestly, like many things? If people are tearing you down, it helps to have people lifting you up. We're losing the spirit of community in all ways, and that includes supporting artists and writers. My stories matter. They matter to me, they matter to other people. They are so worth telling. I'm glad I didn't give up. And honestly, maybe it's a bit petty but let me be petty: I'm still going, people who didn't want me to, and I'm not only doing fine, but I think it'll only get better with time for me! <3

[the-ghost-king]

i'm going to summarize how I feel so far as: this feels a lot more like a fumbling awkward introduction rather than an epic in terms of quality. there's a lot of beginner mistakes like "show don't tell" being completely overlooked here as far as I can tell. they're hopefully doing something right as this is apparently good enough to get them published but so far will feels like a tv trope hot guy arm candy who's there more for the plot rather than to be a person, and nico has a similar sort of thing going on that reminds me of the failures of all the mass media "teen tv" main characters. the thing that has always sold me on rick's work has been the fact that he's able to produce fairly interesting and introspectively deep characters which are multifaceted no matter the circumstances or how awful the rest of his work is, and even when he fails at producing a quality characterization he still manages to do so in a way that's interesting- this isn't like that, nothing in this book feels like that so far. I'm trying to hold out some hope just because this is still a preview but I can say my excitement definitely isn't there, don't get me wrong I am stumbling into things I enjoy but at the same time I feel like oshiro and rick desperately need someone who has a understanding of writing as a craft or an art form to come in and help them fine tune everything because it really does feel like wattpad fanfic or highschooler creative writing essay prompts and it's just so all consuming in the text it's hard to look beyond.

also to anyone saying "if you don't like it move on its not for you" maybe there's truth in that but it's also not wrong to criticize an author for where they fail to deliver, there are other books I have read cratered to similar age groups that I continue to return to and reread repeatedly even as I age because they're so well done or the author was able to deliver things so effectively and it's truly wonderful to get to rework your way through that every time you pick up the text- hell even some of Rick's books are like that, I can constantly find something new and interesting each time I return to them. I will say I do feel like there is still that quality to this piece but ultimately it's significantly moreso overshadowed by all the problems with it that it's really hard to have that desire to return.

[poorlittleyaoyao]

I forget which comic book writer came up with it (Kelly DeConnick? I think?), but there's a joke that if you can replace the canon love interest with the sexy lamp from A Christmas Story and the story doesn't change, the love interest's "characterization" is hack writing.

Dunno why I suddenly thought of that... :)

What an unexpected Ask topic, anon! Soooo random!

I will say that I think you can have a distinct, developed character whose absence wouldn't change the story on a plot level, either because their importance is thematic rather than functional, or because the author did a fine job with crafting a character but failed at integrating them meaningfully into the work as a whole. But yeah, with love interests in particular, oftentimes it's a characterization flop because they're treated as accessories rather than people.

and for the sake of my Ask box, I am pleading the Fifth on further opinions on how and to what extent either of these things apply to the work at hand!

[azurillturtle]

someone had the bad taste to praise the martian where i could see it, and no one actually pays attention to me here and i'm free to be as unhinged as i want, so HERE WE GO: the no-holds-barred explanation of why i hate andy weir with a burning passion and why he's representative of greater problems in the scifi industry.

full disclosure, my only experience with him was reading 1/3 of artemis, which was more than enough for me to declare i'm never touching his works again. it was more than a year ago now, though, so i can't remember everything that upset me.

disliking andy weir is not an unpopular opinion! as far as writing craft goes, you'll generally hear people say that he's not a very good writer. this is partially about that and partially about other stuff specific to me that i didn't like.

as far as i can know, the martian was about a guy stranded on mars having to survive on his own. first person, snarky narrator. very popular. the narrator, whose name escapes me, was very well liked. because it was his first real story, and because there was really only one character on his own, i think a lot of the problems in his writing weren't immediately obvious.

unfortunately for me, the one we tried to read was artemis, widely regarded as the weakest of his books, probably because it shows off exactly how bad he is. and from artemis, this is what i concluded:

andy weir is a scifi writer for people who don't read much and want to feel like they're smart.

there, i said it.

unfortunately i am very much not that target audience. i read enough scifi/fantasy to have a good idea of what goes into a book that i like or dislike; i read enough to drop books that i think are terrible because i've developed standards. i'm also a science major who doesn't usually read hard scifi because i know enough to spot inaccuracies that drive me out of my mind, or at the very least, break immersion. ("that does not work that way.")

weir, for all his "experience," has enough inaccuracies in his writing to earn sideways looks from me. so that's part of it: his "problem solving" isn't realistic enough to be engaging. if it's enjoyable, that may be because you don't immediately spot the flaws in his reasoning.

weir is also a terrible writer. the first thing i said to my coworkers about artemis after i gave it up was that i don't think he's ever spoken to a woman in his life. this is a common criticism. i hear there are only two women in project hail mary, and only for like two seconds, presumably because someone pointed this out to him. they have the same problem.

quite unfortunately, artemis is told from the perspective of a woman. a... twenty-seven year old woman. who i legitimately thought was sixteen based on her maturity and behavior. this is part of a larger problem, which is (from what i've heard), that weir can only write one character voice, which is the protagonist of the martian, which is weir himself. so all the characters cracking snarky sex jokes in artemis were the same person. like, no wonder i was creeped out by the dude making sex jokes to artemis's protagonist in front of his legitimately teenage daughter.

yeah, so, okay--the protagonist of artemis is Mark Anthony or whatever his name was cosplaying as a twenty-something woman. along with not knowing what a woman is, weir's attempts at characterization are atrocious. jazz is always going on about how smart she is, and everyone's always calling her smart, as if we're supposed to believe their words over her own actions. i'm sorry, no. you can have everyone praise your character for being "smart," but if the entire book is a series of her poor life choices, then she's not reading as "smart" to me.

the third point i'd like to make about his writing is that his plot, at least for artemis, is paper-thin. i'm going to spoil the plot, since i sincerely hope no one is going to read it after this post. as part of a get rich quick scheme, said Skeevy Rich Dude hires jazz to sabotage some idk machines mining the moon's surface??, because then the owners will have no choice but to turn to him and he can become rich.

because, you know, if all of your equipment explodes, surely no suspicion will fall on the person who stands to benefit the most from this.

surely.

but no one ever questions the wisdom of this. it's never brought up. i feel like an actual sixteen-year-old could have pointed out the problem here. alas, in this book, major plot points and the reality of how people will act aren't even thought out.

another part of why artemis is generally regarded as weak--and this is extremely hilarious to me--is that weir doesn't know how to write dialogue. at all. every conversation was stilted and full of sex jokes, like that was the fallback when nothing else could be said. this is something that was not immediately evident in the martian, probably because mark anthony (...watney?) was alone and had no one to show off weir's absolutely horrid dialogue writing.

as an example of why there's also like... quite a bit that just read as weird or gross? partly again that weir has never seen a woman in his life, partly that he doesn't know what a real person is. anyway, jazz is a Strong Independent Woman, which in weir's world means she has a lot of sex. this leads to as scene where she asks a Weird Guy Acquaintance for a favor and he says, sure, but in return, can you test something for me? i'm working on a reusable condom, so i want you to try it the next time you sleep with someone.

because you know. this is a conversation that is Totally Normal to have with someone.

what the hell, weir.

unfortunately i did not stop reading there.

i quit when andy weir made it clear he does not know how and why laws should exist, and (by wider extension) the underpinnings of a functional society and how to worldbuild.

this will lead into my last point, but to briefly summarize what infuriated me so much: jazz says offhandedly that there are no statutory rape laws in their moon society. the age of majority is different for every culture, you see, so rather than come to a consensus, they decided it was easiest to go without. if anyone does anything creepy to a girl, weir says, that girl's brothers and father will come beat up the guy, and the problem solves itself.

that was the time i threw the (digital) book in the (metaphorical) trash can, because this is one of those passages that speaks volumes about the author himself.

i shouldn't have to say this, not when there's so much recent discussion about age of consent and child marriage laws, but oh my god no that's not how it works. set aside the vigilantism for a second here, that's not what i'm focused on. laws like that exist to protect the vulnerable. not everyone will have family they trust to come to their defense. not everyone can tell such things to their family. by having no laws, you are saying that it doesn't matter what happens to them, because "it's too hard to come to an agreement between different cultures."

laws are not about convenience. laws are about guarding the safety of the population.

on the one hand, it's another example of weir not thinking through the repercussions of his plot and worldbuilding. on the other, it read so much like something written by a privileged white man, not the Muslim woman protagonist, that to me it says something about andy weir himself.

and that leads into my last point, which is disliking andy weir not because of whom he is, but because of an underlying problem in the writing and publishing industry. it's a known fact that white men have a distinct advantage in publishing, especially in SFF. heinlein held strong for a long time. GRRM waxed poetic about the good ol days at a fairly recent disastrous WorldCon. it was still fairly recent that the Hugos started to see a more diverse group of nominated authors.

and then there's andy weir, who had publishing deals based on the strength of his first novel. andy weir, whose second and third books were optioned for movies iirc before they even came out. andy weir, who is not good at plotting, and not good at worldbuilding, and not good at inventing more than one character, and not good at writing women, and not even always accurate about the science.

why does andy weir of all people get those movie deals?

and would he, if his name was something other than andy weir?

[crimeronan]

Hi! I love your writing and I was wondering what are your inspirations? Like what works do you think formed you and such. And maybe your favorite books, or things you think are written in a similar way??

oh i LOVE this question. and thank you!! i'm glad you enjoy it 🥺

if you found my writing through book fandom then i'm not sure how helpful my answers will be but if you found it through the owl house or leverage then i can certainly point you in the direction of some stuff to read!

first on the list is unsurprisingly the raven cycle and the dreamer trilogy by maggie stiefvater -- i have learned a LOT about metaphor, characterization, relationship arcs, and internal/unreliable narration from her work. it's fabulous. i am so enamored by her craft that i even paid to attend a seminar she taught alongside court stevens many years ago -- it was FULL of info about every part of the process & general tools for getting unstuck & worth every penny.

her writing is very Very good if you want a close POV, dynamic relationships, very spicy and horrible mistakes, and people who are Doing Their Best while being very very very unwell and unequipped for the issues they're facing.

second would be leigh bardugo's work -- i'm most enamored with her adult fiction (which is very Very adult and dark) but she's best known for the six of crows duology, which is also excellent. her writing features similarly close POVs and messy character relationships. also KILLER social commentary, Especially in her ninth house series.

third would be the webcomic homestuck, which has most definitely been the most formative on how i write dialogue and general humor. YMMV on whether reading homestuck is an enjoyable experience; some people adore it and hyperfixate on it for a full decade (me) and some people would Literally Rather Die.

fourth is probably gillian flynn's work. gone girl is her best known and most Fun novel but i personally love sharp objects the most. that book is very dark and adult and features lots of poor decision making, self harm, drug use, parental abuse, etc. truly the whole nine. the television adaptation is also very good and book-accurate! gillian flynn does psychological horror in a way i Adore which is lovely because it is my favorite overall genre while also being a genre that Fucking Sucks. (lots of generically "crazy" villains and ableist edge for the sake of edge in the average psychological horror novel.)

i'm blanking on other books that have meant worlds to me even though there are a lot. one MUST READ though is the sea of ink and gold trilogy by traci chee, the first book is "the reader." it's a fantasy series that's so well-written and compelling and full of earnest characters and love and grief and hope and tragedy that it took my BREATH away. it's been a while since i reread it but i should soon because ohh my goddd it is So Fucking Good.

[a-libra-writes]

hi! I hope this is okay to ask, if not that’s okay too^^

I’m a (fanfic) writer also! I love writing but I often struggle with coming up with ideas. I dont have a big following on tumblr (I dont publish my works here), which makes it difficult because I can’t really take reader requests.

I was wondering if you have any tips for coming up with writing topics when you’re stumped? Thank you, I really look up to your work.

Oh this is a fun message!! Ok sorry if i ramble, but i love talking about writing and craft! Im also gonna reblog a specific post of writing advice and encouragement that i adore.

I'd start with what's your favorite sort if fic to write - is it classic multi-chapter fics, oneshots, head canons? Which ones really stood out to you - what were their tropes, tags, the characters? Now, which of those you kind of liked, but something felt off? Was it the prompt, something in the plot, something in the characterization? And which ones peeved you so much you just had to click off - what about those annoyed you?

This will help you visualize what you look for in fanfic, and what sort of scenarios and characterization click with you. If you're writing a single character, that's much easier to work with than say, 10 (or 30~40 .... word to aspiring and new writing blogs ....... maybe give yourself a character limit orz........)

You'll find some characters come naturally to you, wether because they're your favorite or a character archtype you just "get". Some you'll love but still struggle with - I remember being so worried with writing Roose and Tywin from ASOIAF, because they're subtle and more complex. And honestly, I don't like my early work with them ... but I kept at it. You gotta keep at it. Now I'm pretty confident in writing them; it took a while to get there!

((Also I think all writers in general should consider what their strengths and flaws are - this can be hard to pin down objectively, especially after staring at your own work for hours! Think what your favorite parts of writing are. Which parts in your story are giving you that rush of excitement, and why? Which parts are you dreading to work on?))

I think some topics/scenes will jump at you and beg to be written, but it's annoying when you want to write your fav and you're drawing a blank. While requests can be great for this - I've gotten so many delightful ones - you also need to draw from your own creative well. So, how?

Reading other fic is a great inspiration. Don't be afraid to say someone directly inspired you - link to them and mention them! - and build off that. As I said earlier, what if you read a fic that had a great plot or scenario, buuuut you would've done something different? "What if" is a great starter. If you're writing reader insert stuff like this blog, draw from your own experiences in life. Or maybe there was something in the show/book/movie/etc that you really wanted to see, but it didn't happen. What if this character didn't die? What if this major event went differently? "What if" is the basis of all fanfic - besides smooching, that is.

(You can also take a prompt you read in one fandom fic and apply it to another! "Oh i love this reader insert story from Show A, how would my blorbos from Movie B respond in the same situation?")

And on that note, sometimes it's fun to write what personally comforts you and what's your personal fantasy. Requests revolving around family life and kids are easy because I love that shit, and it's something I'd think up on my own without prompting. Lists are great for this - what do you like to write best? What scenarios or characters are you curious about exploring? Brainstorm and make notes! Daydream! Discuss with other fandom friends! You don't have to sit down and chunk out a complete 2.5k+ word fic for every idea. Sometimes just the notes and brainstorming is enough, sometimes you'll wanna explore further.

I feel like most writers will understand that feeling when an idea just grabs them and they have to pursue it. Requests and suggestions are all well and good, but at the end of the day, write what grabs you. That's what you'll put your heart into and feel proud of. It may stay a 300 word drabble or sprawl into multiple chapters of madness, or fall somewhere in between - it's your fic!

[thepoetjean-makes-stuff]

UPDATE ON LEARNING HOW TO WRITE SCI-FI: Got a few writing craft books based off online reccs! Still reading them but they've deffo helped me figure a lot of things out, writing AND genre wise when it comes to sci-fi specifically. Will report back if they're useful in the long term.

From what I can gather about most old school sci-fi is it focuses on Really Cool Scientific Theories and Concepts TM, but as a result, a lot of the other story aspects like plot, characterization, ect fall to the way side, which is a shame. A lot of speculative fiction genre stuffs has this problem, but because sci-fi has been so Male-dominated and closed off until fairly recently, we got the a lot of the same mistakes and perspectives storywise because they base themselves off of each other, so to speak.

I only care about this cool alien world insomuch it matters to the characters, and a LOT of old scifi just skips over that in favor of worldbuilding, cool concepts, etc.

ALSO -- IVE APPARENTLY READ MORE SCIFI THAN IVE REALIZED HEHE IM A FRAUD--

I read a LOT of Jules Verne growing up, and now I've been reading a lot of Octavia Butler, literally the Queen TM of Modern Scifi (though she would have called the work she wrote 'fantasy' -- go figure). I'll read some more in the genre before figuring out what kind of sci-fi //I, myself// wanna write, but I'm enjoying myself more than I previously thought I would! And that's good!

Also, many thanks to my own Dad who's love of scifi and reading nutured my own love of reading and writing in a lot of gentle, parallel ways. Love you, Dad :3

Ok, enough sap, back to research! Thanks for listening as I scream into the void, yall!! Take care of yourself :3

[lizzybeth1986]

I’ve just dived into your perfect match posts, specifically the ones about the different dialogue for the various Haydens. Holy crap, PB put so much coding behind those and yet these days they can’t handle more than one meaningful romance route at a time, or get a GoC characters pronouns right.

Also I am just amazed at the depth you’ve explored some of these stories……wow!!!

Thank you Anon! I'm so glad to see my Hayden Young Project posts are still helpful, almost 4 years after I put it up! At the time I had planned an essay series to go with it, but I was too drained by the time I finished uploading all the screenshots to continue. Maybe one day...

But yes. Hayden was such a perfect example of customization done with purpose and thought towards the differences, while still giving the character itself a strong default core. No matter which trait/personality type you went for, there were certain things without which Hayden would never be Hayden: their questions about life, their thirst for knowledge, their fierce protectiveness, their desire to make sense of themselves and the world around them. They went through so much growth over the course of those two books.

Even so, in the larger fandom that effort and care for characterization was often ignored. More often than not, when PM was still playing, readers would find excuses to hate on Hayden and pretend they had no value. They spoke of Hayden as if they were an object, they hated on Hayden for normal emotional reactions - while their favourite Damien was hailed for his "incredible growth" even though we never once saw him apologize to the people he hurt - and even after the books ended, I would often see posts about how Hayden is "whiny" (fandom loved to wave around the "he's traumatized!" card for Damien yet waved away the abuse Eros had done on Hayden and the hostility they constantly faced like it was nothing). In fact, the whole reason I started the Hayden Young Project in the first place was because several stans (specially Damien stans) were lying notstop about how Hayden didn't have that many variations beyond the first few chapters.

For a character that really was crafted with a lot of care, the fandom clearly seemed reluctant to show any appreciation. And it's a pattern I see with a lot of the early customizable characters. They are far more easily written off as bland and boring and devoid of any development, meanwhile default white/exoticizable brown mains who get hundreds of diamond scenes yet still stangnate as characters - because their writers don't want to admit to their flaws - are hailed as the best written characters ever.

I definitely agree with your point about the current state of characterization in PB! (though a lot of my info is secondhand, so don't blindly believe me on this). I sometimes have a term for the way PB uses customization now - "bandaid customization". It has struck me, ever since I saw the note (post-BLM statement) from the company, as well as their one-year-later update, that they believe making their single main LI customizable is enough. But that doesn't allow for the character themself to explore aspects of their story related to gender or race (eg: TNA with an f!Sam skips over certain things related to sexism, that should affect her, but doesn't really) because the writers themselves seem unable to move out of the headspace that the "default" is definitely white and mostly male. And this is at a time when they prove that they KNOW how to change dialogue to reflect race or gender (eg. The D&D MC's responses to Luke when they discuss his father, or to Hamid when the two speak about racism). So you can get a black character, you can get a female character to romance...but it won't count for much. Because it's a lot more likely the writer is seeing a white and male main when they're penning the lines, and it shows...now more than ever.

Did these problems exist with the early customizables? Yes, definitely. But there was still a little more care and purpose to the way they were written, and not all the advancements PB has the ability to code in now were there before.

I call the currect state of customizable characterization "bandaid" because the company views this specifically as a solution for the lack of race representation, yet it really doesn't solve the core problem. But I may be wrong, and the new books that I haven't heard much about, could be better in this respect.

To go back to the subject of Hayden - not only was the PM team consistent about divergences in traits, but they also did the same for their different skills (polyglot, animal lover, music, massage). I found a number of incredible and really fun scenes that replaced a skill scene - my favourite one being Sloane trying to liven up our first real visit to their house with "baby-shower games" in PM1 Ch7 instead of us playing with Dipper 😄 Oh Sloane. You're such a treasure 💖

I just found the way they built Hayden so fascinating, and I wanted to share it with the fandom too...whether most of them wanted to admit to the value of such a character or not.

I definitely will try to get that essay series done, someday. Thanks so much once again, anon!

[darkshrimpemotions]

I don't disagree with anything specifically (except maybe a bit with your tag that Dany started out mad from the beginning). I think I also didn't clarify a lot of the context of my thoughts, given this was mostly a 3am thought jot prompted by Youtube Shorts throwing me so many Dany clips lately.

I mention GRRM's love of undercutting heroes not because I feel he fumbled Dany's ending (as you said, we don't know yet), but because that's a bludgeon levied against fans of Dany a lot: that we should know better than to latch onto heroes in GRRM's work. But this doesn't work when we're talking about the show and Dany's ending specifically, IMO, because of the difference in how GRRM handles the material vs. how D&D handled it. And I contrasted Ned and Dany because I feel they're great examples of that difference.

Back in season 1, D&D were still striving to be somewhat faithful to the books. GRRM was consulting, the characters were layered and nuanced, the writing was smart. Ned's death works in the show as in the books, because show!Ned is quite similar to book!Ned in all the ways that matter most to supporting his arc and ending. However shocking it might have been for audiences on first watch, Ned's death isn't purely for shock value or to "subvert expectations." It's rooted in the character and the world he inhabits. When you're new to the world of GoT, it feels like an indicator of what kind of story you're in. On rewatch, it feels like the natural, inevitable end for his character as you watch him make mistake after honorable mistake.

Not so with Dany. As you said, her characterization is somewhat different in the show than the books. We get less of her inner thoughts, and not only are the people she does the most brutal things to abusers and slavers and worse. Often when she does listen to her advisors and take the more merciful path, it ends badly for her, for her cause, and/or for those she seeks to protect. Dany is not written with the same level of nuance as the other characters in the show, almost from the very beginning. And when her ending comes, it doesn't play out like a well-crafted result of her hubris or any other flaw. It plays out as a series of decisions that feel inconsistent and out of character for her, coupled with a sudden unwillingness to listen to her advisors that feels justified, given how many times those very people's advice has gone poorly for her. If anything, there are several instances where Dany listening to her brutal impulses would have likely resulted in less carnage in the long run, for everyone involved. Which reads almost as the narrative both vindicating and punishing her at the same time in a way that just feels pointlessly frustrating and cruel to its audience. Her ending isn't satisfying, or even particularly shocking. It isn't the natural or inevitable conclusion of anything. It doesn't feel rooted in her arc or in the world of GoT. It doesn't sink in on rewatch to enhance her arc or the story. It's just pointless and stupid.

I don't know how GRRM will end the books (or even IF he will end the books--personally if something of mine got that screen treatment I, too, would struggle to work on it). But if he does I'll be interested to see whether a similar ending can be made satisfying with better build-up and execution.

I know GRRM likes to undercut fantasy heroes, but I think the reason Ned Stark's death works so well while Dany's doesn't is because Ned's death is only shocking on first watch, while you're still in the mindset of the traditional high fantasy plot and tropes. In retrospect, familiarity with both the world of ASOIAF/GoT and Ned's character make his death feel entirely earned. You can see each mistake and character flaw that lead to his end.

Dany, on the other hand, suddenly behaves in ways that are inconsistent with her character...as do many of those around her. She is repeatedly rebuffed, gaslit, and betrayed by everyone around her, and keeps giving them second and third chances only to suddenly act without cause or mercy and unleash a deluge of unspeakable violence against civilians she has never met.

In the end, she goes mad and dies more than anything because she's a woman, not because there was any significant or meaningful build-up that points in that direction (and no, other characters making comments worrying she might go mad do not constitute build up). It just feels so shallow and unearned.