#i have another math exam coming up that i'm stressing over and tomorrow i have to try to sort things out w my insurance company

[ategods]

sorry for my silence ooc and ic friends 😔 life is lifeing

[retainerstainer]

Is the crashout even worth it?

I'm not talking about a headache or anything, but the crashout of going to school from 9-2, work from 5-10, and in between that 2 hour window, I have to workout, eat healthy, walk my dog, bring in the cat, finish a last second exam, write out my study set for my math quiz that's tomorrow, heat up food for family because even they're dumbasses can't see where I left the leftovers, get coffee, smell good, drive for 20 minutes to work, serve with a smile, not give attitude, don't backtalk, 10 minute paid break my ass, get back on the floor, do go backs, do recovery while your manager is stuffing herself with diabetic shock meals from the fast food corner store, finish shift, count the till, clock out, drive home for 20 minutes, get changed, do nightly skincare ritual, finish homework, listen to Ted talk topics about another research essay you're doing, sleep late, repeat.

And what's so funny is that I always manage to keep getting up on time, and putting in my all, but there are days, or even a week, where I just want to send the coordinates and watch the whole thing explode and blame it on Staten Island folks, because even this is so not worth it.

The sensation of losing control over everything you're attempting to manage can bring in burnout. Little things that I notice are happening of this, is the not eating part, where for some reason not eating and just using my thoughts and overwhelming stress feeds me more than food. Shit, maybe I should sign in the psych ward. And when I'm trying to be better with my attitude it always gets worse, and I'm easily getting angry, or difficulty focusing can be the first thing, and the sleep pattern is so inconsistent. Because some people want to prove themselves and stay up with everyone else, I see people participate in many activities, and I can feel the exhaustion coming from them and it feels like you're just spinning your wheels and never getting anywhere.

And the crashout isn't even relaxation; it's literally being glued to your bed and never wanting to move from it. It's the overthinking thoughts again over feeding you; "I should start on my project soon." "Maybe just 5 more minutes" "If I eat this and it costs this much, then maybe I shouldn't be consuming that for health reasons" "If I don't eat now I can eat all I want until this hour" I'm about to lose my mind and sell my brain for science any fucking second now. I'm 20-something years old (It feels like) I don't want to spend the rest of my twenties crashing out, burning out, every single fucking other day. I want to be great or nothing, I can't cry about having a lot on my plate when my goal was to eat.

[bsdndprplplld]

29 X 2022

another exhausting week finally over! fortunately I have two extra weekend days, so I can rest and do my homework without stressing over it

I found another promising youtube channel about learning. and "insanely difficult subjects" sounds about right when it comes to everything that's happening in math

I wish there was more content about learning math specifically. the tips I see, however good and useful for studying memory-based stuff such as biology or history, don't seem to work for math

for now my best method is to study the theory from the textbook, trying to prove everything on my own or if that fails, working through the proofs, coming up with examples of objects and asking (possibly dumb) questions that I then try to answer. afterwards I proceed to solving exercises

recently I've been studying mainly commutative algebra, in particular the localization

we didn't spend much time discussing local rings so I had to find some useful properties on my own. the whole idea of "local properties" is an interesting one and I definitely want to read more about it

I find it to be much more elegant to study localization through its universal property and exact sequences rather than through calculation on elements. it's funny how you can cheat so many of our homework problems by knowing basics of category theory and a little bit of homological algebra

I wonder if it's possible to learn math using mind maps, never actually tried. here is my attempt at doing that for one of the subjects in complex analysis:

other than studying I had to prepare a presentation for one of my courses

the topics were given to us by the professor so I thought it would be boring and technical, but I got lucky to discuss the possible generalizations of the Jordan theorem

now I'm gonna talk about something more personal

this week has been difficult because my brain doesn't enjoy existing. some days I had so many meltdowns and shutdowns, I could barely think and speak, let alone study difficult subjects in math. it's really disappointing, as I thought it got better after introducing new medication, but apparently I still can't handle time pressure and I break very easily when emotions become overwhelming (which they frequently do). one of the most discouraging parts of a neurodivergent brain is that you can't always say "alright then I'll just work harder" when you see that the situation requires it. you can't, because your brain has a certain threshold of "how much can you take before you snap" and no tips for studying when you're tired can change that. if you try, you'll just have a meltdown and your day is over, the rest of it must be spent regaining your strength and all you can do is hoping that tomorrow will be better

I wish I could always simply enjoy math and see it as an escape route from a confusing world of human interaction and unpredictable emotions, but whenever there is a deadline or grading criteria, I can hardly enjoy it anymore. I know that this is not what it's always gonna be, the further I go the less deadlines and exams we have, so I must wait and one day it might be okey

since june I've been trying to discuss accommodations regarding adhd and autism with my university but the process takes forever and I'm slowly losing hope that I will ever have it easier

nonetheless, I'm willing to do everything to achieve the goal of spending my days alone working on developing some new theory. just a few more years and I might start living the dream

[xmarveled]

Stressed

Pairing: Peter Parker x Reader

Summary: Exam season is coming up and to that you’re stressed would be an understatement. Luckily, everyone’s favorite friendly neighborhood Spider-Man is there to save the day!

Request: Requested by the lovely @waiting-for-motivation. Heyyy honeyy🌞 I don't know if you write for Peter Parker but could you maybe write an imagine where the reder is really stressed about her exams and breaks down because she think she can't do it and Peter cheers her up? Because I'm soooo afraid of my coming exams and I need fluffy Pete❤ Hope this makes you feel a little less stressed! And dw honey, you’re gonna ace that test!!

Warnings: FLUFF, FLUFF, FLUFFFFF

A/N: Writing this got me all excited for Far From Home again!! If you want to request an Avenger x Reader, feel free to drop an ask, leave a comment below or send me a message! ^^

It’s been 3 hours since you started studying, and you were nowhere close to done. For the last 20 minutes, you’ve been staring at one page in your textbook, looking at the words over and over again until they became jumbled together in your useless brain.

Right now, you were staring at one particular formula that refused to commit itself to your memory. You were getting frustrated, especially since math was NOT your strong suit and you had an exam early tomorrow morning. “God damnit.” You muttered under your breath. “I am sick and tired of trying to find your “x” math. Just accept that she’s gone and move on!!” At that moment, your phone rang and you reached over to pick it up.

“Hello?” You mumble into the phone. “Y/N, where are you?” Came MJ’s voice. In the background, you could hear Ned talking excitedly about something, but you couldn’t make out what it was.

“Oh shit.” You say, suddenly remembering that you were supposed to meet up with the gang at the coffee shop down the street. “Sorry MJ, can’t today. Math is kicking my non-existent ass right now.”

“Oh...” Said MJ and you could almost picture her scrunched up eyebrows. “You sure you can’t make it? You could come later if you want.” You really did want to go down and see her, Ned and of course, Peter, but alas, math beckoned.

“I’d love to, but if I want any chance of passing this exam, I’ve gotta study. I’ll see you at school tomorrow!” You say, before hanging up.

MJ signed as she finished her call, walking back into the room Peter and Ned were in. She could hear them from the hallway and as usual, they were arguing about you.

“C’mon man!” Said Ned, clearly exasperated. “When are you gonna ask her out?”

Although she couldn’t see him, MJ could picture Peter’s face turning pink. “I told you! She doesn’t like me like that.�� He said.

“Parker, have you seen the way she looks at you?” Ned demanded. “Ask her out and do it soon, or else some other guy will snatch her up.”

“What!? Who!?” Asked Peter, clearly panicked. “Alright, alright! I’ll ask her when she gets here.”

Before Ned had the chance to respond, MJ stroded into the room. Peter turned and looked at her with hopeful eyes, asking “Is she coming?” MJ shook her head. “She can’t. She has to study for her exam tomorrow.” The cheerful atmosphere in the room was instantly deflated by the news and Peter looked away, trying to conceal his disappointment.

“Oh...” He said, trying to keep the disappointment out of his voice. “Did she say what exam she’s studying for?”

“Math I think.” Answered MJ.

“Math?” Said Peter, sitting straight up. “Did she say if she needed help or anything?” He asked, eyes starting to shine again.

“Nope.” Said MJ, propping herself down next to Ned.

Peter started to inch towards the door. “I’m-I’m just gonna go give her a call. See if she needs help. I’ll be right back!” He said before darting out the door, leaving MJ and Ned to exchange knowing smirks.

Half a hour later, you had still barely moved forward though your revision sheets. Finally, accepting that it was going to be a long night, you stood up to make a cup of coffee when your phone rang again. Your heart started racing when you saw that it was Peter and you picked up immediately.

“Hey Y/N!” You heard Peter say with his usual cheerful voice, making a smile appear on your own face despite your exhaustion.

“Hey Pete, what’s up?”

Peter felt his own heart skip a beat when you called him “Pete”, making his cheeks warm up again.

“I uh-, I heard that you were struggling with math.”

You signed, mentally cursing MJ for selling you out.

“Yeah. Math is really not going that great right now. It’s why I couldn’t come with you guys tonight.”

“I um-” stuttered Peter. “Do you um-maybe need some help?”

“Thanks for offering Pete, but it’s fine, if I go down, I prefer to go down alone.” You say, wondering if you were imagining how flustered Peter sounded.

“Oh well um-. It’s kinda too late for that.” He says.

You frown, confused. “What do you mean?” You ask.

“Well... I’m kind of outside your window right now.”

You spin around and see him exactly where he says he is, outside your window on your balcony, one hand holding his phone up to his ear while giving you an awkward wave with the other. You drop your phone and dash to unlock the door.

“Peter! What are you doing here?” You exlaimed.

“I’m your personal math tutor!” He says, laughing at your shock at seeing him.

“Aren’t you supposed to be with MJ and Ned?” You asked.

“You’re more important.” He says, not realizing that he said it out loud before it was too late. Blushing furiously, Peter quickly asked “so what do you need help with?”

“Everything.” You groaned, heading back towards your chair. You felt him come up behind you and pointed at the question that was currently driving you insane. He leaned forward, taking a look at the sheet.

“Alright, so imagine this. Thor has 362 pop tarts. He splits them evenly between himself and his 3 friends and eats 3/4 of the remaining pop tarts. What does Thor have now?”

“Diabetes.” You mutter. Peter laughed, his breath fanning out on your neck, making goosebumps appear. Both of your laughs died down and you’re left staring at each other, noses almost touching. Up close, you could see the freckles dusted across his cheeks and his slender eyelashes that most girls only dream of having. Both of you looked away, cheeks flaming as your hearts pounded.

“This Thor guy must be really big.” Muttered Peter, drawing another laugh from you and he swears, it’s the most beautiful sound he’s ever heard.

2 hours later, you and Peter were sprawled across your bed, both of you exhausted. With his help, you had (unbelievably) finished studying. Looking over at Peter, you whispered “thanks for helping me tonight.”

“No-no problem Y/N.” Peter whispered back, tripping over his words a little.

You gave him a drowsy smile back, closing your eyes as you felt exhaustion take over you. Meanwhile, Peter could only stare at your beautiful, sleepy face as he felt something warm spread through his chest. This close, he could see the little dimple in your cheeks that deepened whenever you smiled, which was often. He could see the birthmark on your forehead that you were so self conscious about, but to him, it didn’t matter. To him, you were perfect. The last of his self-control shattered when you sleepily nuzzled into his chest and he whispered “I like you Y/N, I really, really like you.”

Your steady breathing halted for a second before you looked up at him with glazed eyes. “I really, really like you too Pete.”

His eyes lit up like stars shining in the light sky and slowly, as if giving you time to pull away, he leaned down. You tilted your lips up and after months of shy glances and secret longing, your lips finally touched.

Fireworks exploded between both of your closed eyelids and both of your hearts felt so full that they might burst. Peter pulled you into his chest and you snuggled into him. It felt like coming home after a long day.

“Goodnight, Y/N.” He whispered, pressing a kiss to your forehead.

“Goodnight Peter.” You whispered and thought that maybe, math tests aren’t so bad after all.

Ahhh!! I think I might have overdone the fluff a little. Hope you guys liked and good luck to those who have exams soon!!💜

Taglist: @xxstarwalker @bxcksdoll @phanoffandoms67 @waiting-for-motivation @bluediamondsevie @antisocial-koala @spider-writer @randomavengersquotes @odinson-barnes @bonemarroww

If you want to be added to the taglist, message me or leave a comment below!! :)

[cannywrites]

Stress Over School: Expectations vs. Reality

I'm going to break the bad news: stress is inevitable when you are a college student. Between endless hours of studying, deadlines for assignments and projects, and exams to worry about, it's nearly impossible not to stress out at some point in time during your college career. Even if you are doing well in school, life inevitably throws curveballs that can add to your existing struggles. If you are currently stressed over school or know someone who is stressed over school, this post will tell you that you're not alone!

Expectation: I will be more productive by working in my room all day.

Expectation: I will be more productive by working in my room all day.

Reality: You can be productive anywhere, including in your room, but you may find that a change of scenery provides a better environment for concentration. If you’re struggling to focus on work while surrounded by friends and classmates (or perhaps they are distracting), then it might be best to take your laptop to the library or coffee shop—where there are fewer people around—and use headphones if needed. If even those options aren’t working out for you, consider heading outside!

There are many benefits of working outdoors, especially when the weather is nice. Whether it’s a city park or nature trail near campus, being surrounded by greenery has been shown to reduce stress levels and enhance creative thinking abilities.

Reality: I will spend the whole day being distracted by noise and staring at a blank Google Doc.

You will spend the whole day being distracted by noise and staring at a blank Google Doc. You put off the work until the last minute and then stress about the due date. You go to bed at 3 a.m., roll out of bed 5 minutes before your 8 a.m., get lost on campus, and miss class anyway because you’re late picking up your ID card...the list goes on and on.

I am not going to say that university is easy, but I am going to say that it does not have to be this stressful! There are many things that can be done in order for you not only to survive but thrive in this new environment and eventually begin having fun again!

Expectation: Starting my homework early will make me feel accomplished.

One of the biggest problems people can have with their homework is their expectations. They might think that they need to start their work as soon as they get home, or that they should do all of their homework at once. Both of these methods are flawed because there’s a lot of information out there and it can be overwhelming to tackle it all at once. The best way to approach this problem is by breaking your assignments into smaller pieces—that way, you don’t feel overwhelmed by everything that needs doing, and you won't get discouraged when things get difficult or take longer than expected!

The first step is making sure you pick the right assignment for yourself. If something like math has always given you trouble in class (or if it's just not your favorite subject), try tackling something else first instead: reading an article online about what your teacher talked about during class today could give a good insight into how she/he thinks; listening to music while working on another subject will help keep your mind clear so when it comes time for math assignments later on later in the evening—or tomorrow morning!—the concepts will come easier."

Reality: I put off the work until the last minute and then stress about the due date.

You're not alone in your procrastination. In fact, you probably have company at this very moment. According to a survey by StudyMode, 43% of respondents reported that they tend to put off their schoolwork until the last minute.

Studies have shown that procrastination can lead to stress and poor performance, but there are some simple ways to overcome it:

Set yourself goals and deadlines for each assignment or project before you start working on it. If you're juggling multiple assignments at once, try creating an order in which you'll work on them (so that the most urgent projects get done first).

Make sure you have all of your materials in one place so that you don't waste time looking for them when it's time to start working on something new. This includes notebooks filled with notes from previous classes or readings (and any other information relevant for future assignments), pens/pencils/paper/pencil pencilpaper...you get the idea!

Expectation: Going to office hours will help me understand the material better.

You may think that office hours are a good place to go for help, but you have to be prepared. If you wait until the last minute and then ask for help, it can make the professor feel overwhelmed or stressed. They might not want to talk with students who haven't done their work. Before going in, try reading the chapter over again and taking notes on what still doesn't make sense. Also, it's important not to go off topic when talking with your professor. If they don't understand where you're coming from and keep asking questions that seem unrelated, this might cause them more stress than necessary!

If we think about our professors as people who are trying their best under difficult circumstances (like us), it becomes clear why they may struggle with providing adequate support at times: they have huge workloads themselves! The best way we can help out is by being respectful of their time while also being proactive in seeking out resources outside of class if necessary (such as other courses or tutors).

Reality: Office hours are always full.

If a professor is not available for office hours, you may feel frustrated and confused. You are putting in the effort to learn, but you can't seem to find resources that will help you understand the material.

In this situation, it's important to remember that professors are human too--they might be having a bad day or they might simply be overworked with other things in their lives. As a result of their busy schedules, professors often leave their doors open during office hours so that students can reach out through email or chat without needing an appointment time slot.

This means that instead of waiting until after the class ends (or even worse: arriving late) and potentially missing out on valuable feedback from both your peers and instructors, try contacting them early on via email or chat before class starts! This way there's less stress involved when it comes down to figuring out whether or not someone wants help understanding course material outside of scheduled times/seats/etcetera."

Expectation: I will go to bed early on Sunday night so that I can wake up feeling refreshed on Monday morning.

Expectation: I will go to bed early on Sunday night so that I can wake up feeling refreshed on Monday morning.

Reality: You toss and turn until 12:30 a.m., before finally falling asleep. Then your alarm goes off at 5:30 a.m., and you stumble out of bed feeling exhausted!

If you want to avoid this scenario, there are some easy ways to get a good night's sleep—and wake up feeling awake and ready for the day ahead. First of all, make sure your body is ready for bed by exercising earlier in the day (exercise releases hormones that help us fall asleep), or taking a hot shower before going to bed (hot showers have been shown to relax muscles). Try not to eat large meals close to when you plan on sleeping because they'll make it harder for you to digest food while you sleep—you don't want indigestion interrupting your quality rest! And whatever time you go down for shut-eye, try not to deviate much from it—if getting up early feels impossible right now because of school stress, it may be better off if instead, we get used to going into class late sometimes rather than running ourselves ragged trying our hardest every single day without fail.

Reality: I will go to bed at 3 a.m., roll out of bed 5 minutes before 8 a.m., and then drink three cups of coffee so that I'm not falling asleep in class.

You will wake up at 3 a.m., roll out of bed 5 minutes before 8 a.m., and then drink three cups of coffee so that you're not falling asleep in class. You will have trouble concentrating on the lecture because you are so exhausted from working so hard all night. You'll go home with homework due this weekend, but again—you're just going to sleep it off until tomorrow morning.

Then, when Monday rolls around again and you start another week at school, all of these problems come back: the tiredness, the lack of focus in class, feeling overwhelmed by everything else besides schoolwork that needs doing (laundry? Cooking?). Before long it's Wednesday night again and time for another late night spent writing papers or cramming for exams—and then Thursday morning is here again, waking up early for another day at school...

Stress over school is inevitable but also manageable. It's important to keep in mind that stress is a natural part of life, and it can be managed. It can be beneficial in certain circumstances and situations. For example, your body releases adrenaline to help you react quickly when confronted by an immediate threat. This can be good if you need to protect yourself or others from harm—it's not always bad! However, most of the time we experience stress because we are overworked or overwhelmed by our responsibilities at school and home—things that don't actually pose any threat to our safety or well-being. In fact, sometimes stressful situations can actually make us stronger when we learn how to cope with them effectively!

My intention for this article was to make you feel a little less alone in your school stress. We’re all feeling it, and we’re all doing the best we can to get through it. Stress can negatively affect our health and well-being, but there are actually positive things that come out of stressful situations, too. Studies have shown that stress can increase resilience as well as motivation and productivity. Stress has also been shown to increase creativity and innovation in individuals who work under pressure. So while you might feel like your world is falling apart on a Friday night when you have four papers due on Monday morning, try taking a deep breath and turning the situation into an opportunity to exercise your brain muscles! Eventually, you’ll learn how to deal with stress in ways that will make every situation more manageable—even if it doesn’t seem like it at first glance.

[destiny-islanders]

Eyyy I have my hardest final tomorrow, so I'm pretty stressed about that, any tips besides looking at you art while I should be studying? (It's a chemistry final)

Hoo boy!

I was an English major, so I never really had to take any high-level science class… But I was a pretty decent student, so maybe these tips will help:

If you haven’t already, typing out the notes you hand-wrote in class is a really effective way to get that info into your head. Type your notes out into a study guide that you can save to your phone or print out to study before class 

This might be hard to do with formulas and all that… but it worked really well for my English classes

Repetition

Seems obvious, but reading a concept and then repeating it over and over until you can recite it by heart is a fundamental way to memorize material you need to know for a test. 

Always revist the material you’ve memorized! If you only commit it to memory once, the chances are it will leave your brain and enter the void :( 

What I’d do is memorize one thing, then recite it, then memorize another thing, and recite everything from the top.

(This is how I memorize lines when I’m cast in plays! Hahahaha)

Mnemonics

While trying to memorize a list of names or steps in a process, I would always come up with mnemonic device for it. 

Like PEMDAS for math! (Please Excuse My Dear Aunt Sally to help remember Parentheses, Exponents, Multiplication, Division, Addition, Subtraction)

Don’t study for super long periods of time. Break study time into chunks and then briefly reward yourself

Usually I’d study for 20-30 minutes, then allow myself to go on Tumblr for 5 minutes. Or I’d read an entire chapter of my assigned reading.

I think this probably won’t be effective for everyone, but it helped with my study fatigue and encouraged me to stay focused, since I’d be getting a break soon enough

Quiz your friends

This probably isn’t going to help since your exam is tomorrow >_

But I would print out my study guides and use them to quiz my friends! And you can always pass the guide off to a friend and have them test you. But I’ve always found asking others the questions in most effective for me.

Hope this helps! I graduated from university summa cum laude using these study techniques, so maybe they can help you, too. :> Good luck! You got this!!

[juvian]

A turn of events - Chapter 8

Header cr.

Summary : Korimi Lockser always been one of the best students, but one day when her crush decide to come visit his friends more often, including her sister. She decide do to the dumbest thing she’s done in her life… fake being stupid to get is attention.

Disclaimer : Fairy tail belong to Hiro Mashima !

Characters : Korimi Lockser (Oc), Elleira (Oc), Minerva Orlando, Yukino Aguria, Rogue Cheney, Sting Eucliffe, Rufus Lore, Orga Nanagear, Lyon Vastia.

Shipping(s) : Oc X Lyon Vastia.

Genre : High school au, modern au, romance and humour.

Words : 2320

Chapters : Masterlist // Chapter 7 // Chapter 9

Chapter 8 

***Italic = Text***

“So hi Lyon, I was wondering if you could come every day this week to work with me even if 15 minutes and”

Arg… I can’t ask him to come every day! And what can we do in 15 minutes seriously, Korimi you can be stupid sometime!

It’s been half an hour since I tried to text Lyon about our lessons this week. My exam is Friday, so only a week is left for me to make an impression on him with this plan. You are going to tell me « He is Gray’s brother and basically your friend now you can continue without the math». Hahaha I could, but I won’t.  I can’t talk to him without looking stupid while doing math, imagine with no subject of conversation at all? You guys are underestimating me. Time to try texting him again.

“Hi Lyon, I hope you had a great day! Since my exam is Friday, I was wondering how many days we could see each other for our little lesson this week? I don’t want to be a burden, but I need the maximum you can give me. I need to see you at least the day before, if it’s possible. Thank you!” 

Send. I think it’s going to be okay. I hope. 

I spent 30 minutes, on my bed, looking at the ceiling, waiting for Lyon to answer my text. When my phone rang, I took it so fast that I didn’t even remember taking it. Only to see that it was not Lyon, but my cousin texting me.

“Your sisters tried luring me with some cake so I visit you next weekend, make sure she does it and it’s not bullshit”

“How many she said she will do?”

“She said 3, I’m counting on you Kori, don’t mess up this mission”

“Alright captain!”

At least it wasn’t Sting, I would have killed him for making me think it was Lyon. I was going to put my phone down on the table again, when I received another text, probably Elleira again. OH! NO! IT’S HIM!

“I don’t think Wednesday will be possible, but I can see you the other days, well tomorrow, I have a night class so I can’t come to your house , but we could go eat together between 4pm and 7pm, what do you think ?”

Is He really asking me that?! If having a date, well not a date but you know, will bother me?! OMG. I think I’ve been squealing and fangirling for 15 minutes before I took the time to answer him, take a big breath Korimi and calm your fucking self a second!

“It doesn’t bother me at all, just tell me where and I’ll be there!”

“No don’t bother, I’ll come to your school and take you there”

Oh god…. I will seriously not concentrate at all at school tomorrow, I’m lucky there’s 2 days of class left and no exam.

***

“Korimi we need to talk! You can’t continue like this anymore!” Minerva said, sitting in front of me in the cafeteria.

“What did I do?” I ask, with big eyes.

“You were still daydreaming about Lyon this morning! Be a real woman and do something, if you can’t even say shit don’t think you’ll ever have a chance!”

“Ouch Minerva that’s brutal.” Orga said,  making  a weird face, laughing.

“Someone has got to help her and if I have to be mean, I will be!”

“And what do you want me to say?”

“Just flirt with him!”

“Excuse me?! Me flirt? I don’t know how to flirt and I don’t want to scare him away!”

“Well tell him you like him!”

“I can’t do that either!”

Minerva sighed and put her face in her hand. I think she is done with me. I’ll have to find someone else to beat up Sting with me.

“Sting, help me.”

“What? Why me?”

“You are the player here and she is your best friend, help her before she dies alone and sad. 

“I am not a player!” Sting said, before looking at me. “So what you should do…”

Oh my god, Sting no.

***

So Minerva and Sting continued all day to give me stupid advice of how to have Lyon in my bed. Yeah, their advice sounded more like having him in my bed, not to make him fall in love with me … All they thought of telling me was to act stupid: Sting, Dress sexy: Both, make him see the asset I actually don’t have: Minerva, to just fucking tell him: Minerva. So I didn’t tell them, I was actually going to see him after class, I couldn’t imagine what could have come out of their mouth, if I would have told them.

At the end of the day, I didn’t leave anyone the time to talk to me, I yelled goodbye and just ran to my locker, before running again, outside. I was lucky, Lyon was already waiting in front of the school.  

“Hi!” I said, entering his car and giving him the most beautiful smile.

“Hello, how are you?” He said, smiling at me then turning back to the road and started to drive.

“Really good, the day was relaxing and now I can spend time with you.”

Wait… Did I really say that? God. That must be because of Minerva.

“Stop you’ll make me blush.” He said, laughing. Well, that was not too embarrassing. “It's true that spending time with me is amazing, like you know how lucky you are right?”

I rolled my eyes and laughed, yeah I love him but he is full of himself.

***

He took me to this little café not far from his university, it was cute and the food was really great! And the cakes wow! I have to take Elleira here one day. She’ll hate me if I hide this paradise from her.

“So since we only have 3 days left for you to learn everything, today we are going to concentrate on one thing and tomorrow another one.” He said, looking at his textbook. “I found some exercises for you to do and Thursday we are going to study everything over again.”

Great… I’m lucky I’m good at math…     

“What is it ? You look… depressed.” He said laughing. “Don’t worry it’s gonna be easy.”

“Oh! I know! It’s just... I like our little session, I’ll miss it a bit.” I said, laughing.

“Don’t worry, I like you, you are a good friend.” He said, winking at me. “It was fun and I am not going to stop seeing Juvia and you because you finished high school and you can come see me and Gray too sometimes.”

He said he liked me… He said he liked those sessions too… He said we will see each other again… he said I was his friend… And that wink...I think I can die happy now.

“Yeah I know and thank you for all of this.” I said, smiling.

“No problem! And I’ll make you a deal.” He started and I think I started sweating. “If you have a good grade, I’ll take you somewhere to eat, you deserve it after all those efforts.”

It was nice knowing you all, you can write today’s date as the date of my death, thank you.

“O-oh, you don’t have too! It’s normal I want to finish my high school years with good grades!”

“I insist, some people don’t care and don’t do the effort and you did!”

He is so kind, oh my god. I should have known 3 years ago, what Gray said about his brother was bullshit, now I want to know Ultear, she must not be as crazy as he said.

“Now that I said it, time to work Korimi.”

Oh yeah I forgot it’s not a real date.

***

“So how was your date?” Minerva said sitting again in front of me the next day. 

“What date? I didn’t have a date!” 

Ok now I was scared.

“Don’t think we didn’t think, you ran off so suddenly yesterday, weird. I think it’s actually the most suspect thing you did in your life, Korimi Lockser.”

“Minerva is right, it was extremely weird.” Rufus said, nodding.

“I was just in a hurry, it’s nothing weird, my sister needed me for something.”

“Don’t lie to us! Sting said, pointing a finger in my direction. “Rogue and I called Juvia and she said she didn’t know where you were!”

I looked at my best friend, who actually didn’t want to look at me. Rogue looked mad, it’s true he didn’t say much today, but it’s Rogue, he already doesn’t say much even to me.

“It really wasn’t a date…” I said, guilty. “He didn’t have time to come to my house to work so he asked me if I wanted to work in a café.”

“It sounds like a date.” Minerva said, eyeing me suspiciously. “Wait! What work?”

“It wasn’t, we just worked! And oh….”

Oh fuck, they don’t know about this, I fucked up !

“Korimi Lockser… what the fuck are you doing?”

“I asked Lyon to help me with math.”

“You what?”

“I lied to Lyon that I wasn’t good at math so he could help me get better, it’s been more than 2 week.”

The face of Minerva was the most disappointing face that I ever saw in my life. The others looked so shocked. It didn’t take long for Sting to laugh so loud that the entire school was looking at us.

“Did you know about this shit?” Minerva asked Rogue. 

“Yeah, I do.”

“And you didn’t bother telling her it was the most stupid idea ever?!”

“Don’t worry I did, but she didn't listen.”

“I know it’s stupid, but it’s working! I exclaimed, but their faces didn’t change at all. He doesn’t love me yet, but now I can be proud to say that he considered me a friend at least, it’s just a matter of time.”

“Yeah, if it makes you feel better.” Minerva said, sighing and hit Sting on the shoulder. “Shut your mouth you!” She said as he flinched and turned back to me. “I hope you will tell him this stupid bullshit when everything is finished, you can’t lie until you die.”

“Yeah, yeah I will.”

“And I hope, you are at least trying to flirt with him, not just act stupid.”

***

Now that everyone knows about my little plan, I felt really ashamed of myself. It’s true that it’s not right, I did that because I was scared of telling him how I feel and I'm not even trying to flirt with him even a bit…. Ah… 

The second night that we worked together, I didn’t really talk. I felt weird and he must have thought it was the stress, because of my exam the next day. Today was Thursday and tomorrow would finally be my math exam. Which also means the last day of our little lesson. This time I’ll try to be more talkative and use this occasion for real.

***

“Today we will study everything, I’ll ask you what you should do in diverse questions, how to find the answer to the problem and if you have a hard time I’ll give you an example of what you could do with this kind of questions, is it alright?”

“Yeah, I understand, I’ll do my best.”

This time I didn’t mess up my answers, well a little because it would be a little bit too suspect. He looked so proud of me, I was getting really scared of his reaction when I would tell him, I was lying all this time. After an hour, we decide to take a little break.

“Is university taking all your time, I mean, is it really hard to see your friends?”

“Well for me yes, because it’s a really difficult job that I will do in the future, you can’t messed up anything, so I have to study really hard, but sometime I have to take a break, with the exam coming up for me too,  if I don’t take a break, I’ll just go crazy, but it depends, what do you want to do?

“I want to become a teacher, an English teacher.”

“Ok, well I can assure you it will be a lot less difficult to have a life.” He said, laughing.

“Do you have time to… date?”

He looked at me surprised and blushed. I need to know if he actually wants to date or not!

“It’s hard, but not impossible, if the person knows I can’t always be free I could, but for now nothing big is happening.

Don’t worry, I’ll wait for you all the time you need!

“Okay, I never had a boyfriend so I wanted to know if I’ll be single until I finish university” I said, laughing.

“I can’t believe you never had a boyfriend, someone as pretty and kind as you�� He said, smiling and I melted. Oh my god! He is complimenting me. “And intelligent! In less than 3 weeks you progress so much in math!”

Hahaha… yeah…

“Thank you.” I said, furiously blushing.

“I mean you are Juvia's sister after all, it must run in the family.”

I’ll just forget he just said that, I don’t know how to take it.

“I would love to date someone like you.” I said, trying to sound like I was joking, but I couldn’t be more serious.

“Hahaha I don’t think so, you’ll find someone better than me.” He laughed, ruffling my hair.

Well it failed. I'll just stop for today then.

“We should get to the rest, it’s already 8pm.”

“Yeah we should.”

I didn’t have the courage to say anything more to him. I guess, I’ll just wait until I have my result to confess. Because yeah, it’s decided, next time I’ll confess ! I can’t continue like this anymore, Minerva is right.