#i hate that a monologue of this caliber was wasted on that movie

[pattydia]

i ever tell you how I didn’t sleep for five days when i marched through stuttgart? yeah. five days. they say it’s not possible without losing your mind. i couldn’t tell if i was dreaming or awake after three, and in my more lucid moments i wondered if i was ever gonna … get back to normal again. what i did to those hitler youth kids was a fuckin’ nightmare. a nightmare i got to control. i wanted to kill the eggs before they hatched. i was like floating above my body looking down on myself when i cut that little blonde boy’s head off. it was like i wasn’t doing it at all. i think that i remember … just watching myself sit there when that … that body just got up off the ground. total insanity. fever dream. and then he pulled a piece of string out of his pocket, that body without a head, and he held his hands out, and he made a cat’s cradle, and— and what am i gonna do, i just cut his— his fuckin’ head off, am i gonna be rude? so i played with him for a while. and then he just laid back down. i’m pretty— i’m pretty sure it was a dream. but i was just … i was just too scared to move. so i sat there holding that cat’s cradle for hours until you came and you found me with the bodies. i had completely forgotten that ever happened.