#i hate getting scared like a deer in headlights even by the tiniest thing

[failure-girl-fuyu]

i hate not being able to comfort people, cuz i havent turned off the notifs for the vent channels in this 1 discord server and especially when a moot on here vents but idk what to say to make them feel better i just freeze in shame and anxiousness

it feels like ive wronged them, and i hate doing bad things to people,,,,

[dollslayer]

By Its Cover

Dark!Librarian!Steve Rogers x Shy!Reader, College AU

Summary: Your late nights at the university library spark a chain of events. Will they lead to your undoing? To anyone else's?

W/C: 8,890 (oops, sorry)

Warnings: DARK themes, NO MINORS, stalking, murder, minor character death, smut, angst, unprotected sex, oral sex, alcohol consumption, swearing

A/N: FINALLY, I wrote this for @darkficsyouneveraskedfor's 2 Years of Darkness challenge! This fic kicked my ass but after some months I'm so excited about it! This is my first truly dark fic so please don't read if any of these topics upset you but I do want to make a note that the sex is consensual. If I missed any warnings please DM me immediately and I will add them. Reblog/comment if you liked it! Maybe even check out some of my other fics 👀 Cheers!

Main Masterlist

You stumbled slightly on the uneven pavement as you made the final steps towards the graduate school library. It was always so much quieter than the undergrad library and at this hour there’d be a good chance it was just you and the poor person stuck working the overnight help desk. You didn’t mind that though, you were never an overly sociable person and you preferred to work alone anyways.

You swiped your student ID through the sensor and the little green light granted you entry as you opened the door. Looking around there wasn’t even someone at the desk, just the sound of the always-on A/C rattling the leaves of the fake plants in the lobby.

You moved to put your ID away when it slipped from your fingers and plapped onto the floor, your own face staring back up to you from the plastic. You sighed and swung your bag further back over your shoulder as you bent to pick it up when a pair of legs edged their way into your vision. Caught off guard by the man attached to them, you watched him bend to pick up the piece of plastic.

You both straightened back up to your full heights and you found yourself looking up at him. He had clear blue eyes and sandy blond hair that was swept back. He looked like he could be a model, he was so handsome and you felt like a deer in headlights.

You realized that he had your ID in his hand and was waiting patiently for you to take it. You smiled awkwardly and took it from him. He looked back to your card and read your name out loud and snapped you out of your thoughts.

“Thank you” you said more in surprise than gratitude “Sorry, I just, I could’ve sworn no one was here you came out of nowhere” You laughed nervously, hoping to hide your embarrassment. You were never good with talking to people and once a situation got awkward you just got yourself deeper in it.

“I was just coming around the corner when I noticed you dropped your ID. I actually work the late shift at the desk. Serves me right for applying last minute for work through the university, right?” He asked with a small laugh.

“Late night cram session? You look like your back’s about to snap from holding all those books” He pointed to your bag, the stitches of it’s straps were frayed and had been sewn over a couple of times.

“Yeah, I like coming here late, hardly anyone’s here, I don’t have to deal with people and I can just focus” You explained

“Right, well, sorry to keep you. If you need anything I’m Steve, and I’ll be bored out of my mind at the desk” he smirked and walked back towards reception.

You turned down the hall and thought how strange it was that you’d never seen him here before. It was the middle of the semester so he couldn’t have just started but you were in here all the time and you’d never run into him once. You brushed the thought off and continued on your way.

____

Over the next few weeks you and Steve developed a routine. You’d come in around 10 or 11, you’d stop at the desk and chat a bit and then you’d head up to your spot on the second floor to study. Occasionally Steve would see you when he returned books and you’d joke around a bit before he’d leave you to your work. You were building a good rapport with each other and he was pleased.

Sometimes he’d been too shy to approach you. It made him feel like the scrawny, helpless kid he was before the growth spurt. Beautiful girls like you never looked twice at him but he knows that you’re different, he knows that if you had met him then that you’d never treat him like those girls did. He knows that in time you two could really have something special.

Steve understood that building a relationship with you would take time and balance. He didn’t want to seem too eager but ever since he saw you he knew he’d do anything to just talk to you.

It started some months ago when he was visiting Bucky on campus. They had been hanging out in the quad right by a group of buildings when you tripped on the pavement and your books fell at his feet. He helped you up and even collected your books for you but you were too flustered and embarrassed to meet his eye. You eked out a thank you and scurried into the graduate library.

That moment sparked a blooming obsession within him. The following night he was still in town but he went out without Bucky and staked out where he’d been the previous night and watched you go to the library at the same time you had. The next two nights he did this and quickly pieced together your nightly routine.

Within a month's time he was set to transfer for the next semester and when he did he got a job working night shifts at the library. Bucky had asked him why on Earth he’d want that and Steve had shrugged him off, claiming that he wanted to be paid and didn’t want to deal with anyone. Seemed like a good enough reason to anyone else.

And so that’s how Steve found himself invading your personal space to hand you your ID. He enjoyed the way you trembled slightly in surprise. You looked so small next to him, looking up at him. He nearly forgot what he was going to say, feeling suddenly shy himself. You were so close to him and you were just as beautiful as he remembered.

Take it slow, he reminded himself.

____

Your apartment door slammed behind you as you stormed out of the building. You left in only what you were wearing which was a light hoodie and some leggings. You had thought to grab your book bag before you left and it kept knocking into your side with each angry step you took. Tears streaked your face but you tried your best to brush them off and continued on your brisk walk to the library.

You and your boyfriend had gotten into a fight and things got heated pretty fast, they always did with Sean. You had confronted Sean about being gone so often and so late, you’d missed him and wanted to spend time with you. That’s when he started getting defensive and turning your late nights at the library right around on you.

Things escalated to shouting and Sean had gotten so angry that he’d knocked over a pile of your books from the table. It had scared you and that’s when you left. You knew that you’d be getting nowhere with him when he was so angry. You wanted to be alone and needed a distraction so you grabbed your bag and headed for the library.

You secretly hoped Steve was working, it’d be nice to see a friendly face. You’d be lying if you said you didn’t have the tiniest crush on him. He’s handsome and funny and kind and he always knows when to give you space. You wish you’d met him at a different point in your life, you could really see yourself with him in another timeline. Maybe it was just easier to think that having just had a fight with Sean.

You swiped your card and waited patiently for the door to open. You could tell Steve had already spotted you and was looking at you as you passed through the glass doors. He was smiling his same boyish charm smile that made you feel even shier than you already were. You must’ve looked a mess but it was comforting to see him there waiting for you.

“There she is,” Steve said with a smile as he got up from his chair to greet you. His face immediately fell though as he took in the tracks of your tears and your puffy eyes.

“What’s wrong?” Steve looked upset and angry for you. You were touched, but you’d rather leave it.

“I’d rather not talk about it, if it’s okay. It’s nice to see you though, Steve. How’s your night?”

Steve’s jaw ticked but he swallowed and nodded and you were grateful he didn’t push it further.

“Uneventful as usual, it’s good to see you too, doll.”

You felt your cheeks heat at the nickname. If you were on better terms with Sean you’d feel bad but you couldn’t find it in yourself to do anything but giggle.

You said your goodbye to Steve and made your way to the second floor to study.

Hours passed and you had your nose buried in a book when you felt a sudden presence. You looked up slowly behind you and shrieked when you found Steve just inches from you. He held his hands out defensively and tried to catch your breathing.

“Steve, oh my God, I didn’t see you there, you scared me!” You laughed as you caught your breath.

“Yeah, sorry, I uh, have a habit of doing that.” He said as he ducked his head sheepishly and rubbed the back of his neck. Was he blushing? Why did he look nervous?

“I, um. I was uh, I was hoping to maybe ah, ask you something, actually.” Steve swallowed thickly. He is nervous. You smiled at him and motioned for him to go on.

“I was thinking… maybe, when you’re free if um, would you maybe want to go to dinner? With me?” He stammered out.

You smiled and felt heat flood your cheeks all over again, Steve was gorgeous and you were flattered that someone like him would want to go out with you. Just as quickly as that flattery came dread had instantly replaced it. You had a boyfriend, you couldn’t do that to Sean. Oh God, now I have to turn him down. What if he hates me?

“Wow… I uh, Steve,” you started, “I’m. You’re so sweet, I don’t know what to say. But, I have a boyfriend, I’m really sorry”

“But- but don’t think I wouldn’t say yes, if I could. You’re such a nice guy and I’m really happy for our friendship. I hope this doesn’t make things weird between us, I’m. I’m sorry,” You quickly led up with. You felt so awkward and bad that you had to turn him down.

Steve’s jaw ticked and he looked away. A blush of embarrassment had made its way up his neck and into his cheeks. His fists clenched at his sides and he took a deep breath.

“It’s… It’s fine, I’m sorry, I didn’t know. I don’t want things to be weird between us either. You know what? Why don’t we just forget the whole thing? Sorry again.” He finished with a tight lipped smile

You sent an uneasy smile back and nodded.

“Of course, no damage done, Steve.”

With that he left you and you went back to your book. You tried not to overthink the entire situation but couldn’t help but feel slightly uncomfortable.

____

“Boyfriend” the word echoed in his head on a never ending loop with deafening reverb. He nodded curtly at you and smiled. You had your awkward exchange of apologies and excuses. Wordlessly, he made his way back to the information desk. He felt angry but also humiliated, he had spent at least a week building himself up to say something to you and you just turned him down so wholly?

He saw the way you looked at him, the way you laughed at his jokes. Steve knew that he meant more to you than you were letting on. There was attraction there, you were just in denial because you had a boyfriend.

Who even was this schmuck? You couldn’t have liked him that much because if you did then you would’ve mentioned him before but you hadn’t. If you really loved your boyfriend then you wouldn’t have smiled at Steve the way you did or stopped to say hello every night. He needed to see for himself whom exactly it was that was so undeserving of your attention.

Steve checked the cameras and saw that you were packing up your things. He had maybe a few minutes to gather his own things and wait for you. There was someone else coming to cover the library in 20 minutes, it would be fine if he left it alone until then. He decided to make himself scarce from the desk so you wouldn’t have to see him again before you left and you wouldn’t notice he’d be following you.

Waiting for the sound of the double doors to click shut he turned the corner and waited for just a minute. He slunk down the mainways of campus towards the student apartments and stopped just 20 yards away from you up against a wall. You looked so cold all alone in the dark as you buzzed in one of the numbers.

“1B, what the fuck could you possibly want at this hour?” a gruff voice answered over the comm.

“Baby, it’s me, sorry I forgot my keys but you weren’t responding to my texts so” You trailed off as you shivered in the night. No reply came, just the buzzer sounding off. You hurried inside and Steve tried his best to scope out external windows.

Finally the light came on in one of them and to his luck the blinds were mostly open. Through the vertical slats he could make out your entrance and an impeding figure from the hall. It was him, the boyfriend. The guy that was apparently so much better than Steve.

He saw your body language was tense and you opened your mouth to speak but before you could get a word in, your boyfriend was grabbing your face in his hands and kissing you. You looked surprised maybe, but you just let him grab you like that. You just fucking let him.

He watched from his spot against a pillar from the building across the walkway. He clenched his jaw and tried to control his breathing watching this guy, this boy manhandle you like you weren’t something special, something precious. He was disgusted but he couldn’t look away as your clothes were shirked off and you two fucked right there on the couch.

He couldn’t bring himself to watch anymore and stormed off. As he walked back to his place a plan began to form in the back of his mind.

____

Things with Sean were smoothed over. You didn’t really talk, so much as he just fucked you before you could even talk about it. He had kissed you on the cheek after and said he was sorry. So you figured that he was. You didn’t really feel like pushing it anyways.

You made for the library once again, anticipating a long night ahead of you with midterms around the corner.

You let out a shriek as you realized someone was standing over you. Steve was hovering right above you, looking even taller than he already was. You pushed your chair back to get some distance between yourself and him while you caught your breath from the momentary scare.

“Steve, I uh, sorry I didn’t hear you coming, again.”

He leaned himself against the edge of the table and crossed his arms. How had you not realized he was so muscular before? You flushed and scolded yourself for thinking about him like that. You had a boyfriend and Steve was just the nice guy at the library.

He ducked his head shyly and waved your apology off.

“Sorry, guess I’m just sneaky.” He chuckled in amusement but the feeling wasn’t mutual, “I was just up here returning some books when I realized I missed you coming in, thought I’d come say hi.”

“Right,” you replied, “Guess we just missed each other. How’s the desk tonight?”

“Bored to tears as usual, just glad you’re here tonight”

Steve winked at you and you felt your cheeks get hot again and you looked away with a small laugh.

“You always know just what to say, don’t you?”

“Ah that’s not true.” He paused, “I get nervous all the time around pretty girls like you”

You were really in it now. Your cheeks heated instantly and you had to look away from him again. For someone that just got rejected he doesn’t stay down for long. How the hell were you going to talk your way out of this one? He knows you have a boyfriend, why would he say that?

“Anyway, I’ll leave you to it.” Oh, thank God.

He begins to walk back to his cart before spinning on his heel one last time.

“Hey, I forgot to ask. You’re pretty good with art history, right?”

You nod cautiously, afraid that you know where this is going.

“Well, as of right now I’ve got a C. I was wondering if you’d be willing to meet on one of my nights off here and help me out?”

“O-oh. Yeah, of course. No problem. I’m sure Sean wouldn’t mind.”

You were too nice for your own good, saying yes before really thinking it all through. You only realized you had after the words left your mouth so you mentioned Sean to save yourself a bit.

Steve’s eyes crinkled in the corners as he smiled at you.

“Awesome, you’re the best. Maybe we can get together at that cafe on 3rd next Tuesday around noon?”

“Of course, I’ll be there” You confirm.

____

Tuesday couldn’t come soon enough for Steve. He didn’t need any help in art history, he was averaging about an 87, actually. But when you turned him down he knew he had to find another way to get closer to you and he knew that you’d say yes out of pressure.

All in all things were going pretty well for Steve. Despite your shy nature he’d managed to get closer to you much quicker than he expected. He loved watching you get flustered whenever he was close, finding it hard not to get flustered himself. He was impatient for things to move forward but he knew it would all pan out. There was only one wrench in the plan; your boyfriend Sean.

The other night when Steve had followed you home and witnessed Sean manhandle you in your apartment he began thinking of how to remove him from the picture. Steve did his research on Sean and found it suspicious he couldn’t find anything on him. Usually after a little digging you can find something off about anyone, but not him. Steve knew it would take a little more effort, but for you he’d make it.

So that’s how Steve wound up spending his night off in the corner of the dive bar that was just off campus. Off campus enough that you’d need to drive there. He had tailed Sean’s Jeep there after his club soccer game in hopes of finding something he could actually use to justify getting rid of him for you. He groused as he pulled into the parking garage across the street and pocketed his parking stub. He waited a few beats and watched Sean leave his car.

He slinked in the door and grabbed a dimly lit corner booth. The residue of whatever cleaner this place used was causing his forearms to stick to the table at his booth and the air stunk of vape smoke. He was surrounded by other 20-somethings, awkward Tinder hookups and frat bros meeting up to blow off steam.

On the opposite side of the room he spotted Sean, watched him as he approached the bar for another pint. He’d followed him here in hopes of getting some sort of information on him that he could use. After an hour of nursing one beer and absolutely nothing happening with Sean Steve had been ready to give up.

Just as he was getting ready to down the rest of his drink the door had opened and in walked a girl around his age. She looked nervous but excited as she looked around the place. She nearly squealed as she rushed over when she found who she was looking for. A smile slowly crawled across Steve’s face as the girl rushed into Sean’s arms and embraced him with a kiss. This is exactly what Steve needed to get him out of the picture.

Steve discreetly took out his phone and snapped a few photos, even got a video of them kissing again. He figured this would be enough to blackmail Sean into leaving you. Getting what he needed, he grabbed his jacket and left the bar. He felt light as a feather walking home, his plan was finally setting into motion and it wouldn’t be long until you were together.

Tuesday had finally come and Steve’s good mood only carried over. He practically skipped to the coffee shop you two had agreed to meet at. He grabbed a table and waited for you. When he saw you open the door he was grinning ear to ear but his expression quickly changed taking in your appearance. You looked exhausted, like you’d been crying again. This wouldn’t do.

“What’s wrong? Is it your boyfriend again?” Steve asked.

You nodded silently and set down your bag with a huff.

“He’s just been out really late lately, I feel like he’s never home. Then again I’m always out late.”

“Well I’m glad you’re a night owl, otherwise we wouldn’t have met” Steve tried to turn the conversation back to them and to keep it positive.

“I guess you’re right. You didn’t order anything?” You frowned, noticing his empty hands.

“I was waiting for you, it’s my treat.” You opened your mouth to protest but Steve was quick to add, “Don’t even try to argue with me on this one.”

You sighed but ultimately relented, following him to the counter. He let you order first.

“Um, just a small hot chocolate please, thank you so much”

Steve thought it was cute that you didn’t drink caffeine, he knew hot chocolate was your drink of choice. He knew this of course from hours of pouring over every profile of yours he could find on the internet. He even found your tumblr you were just sure nobody knew about. Turns out you’ve got quite the dirty mind. But that was a thought for another day. Steve turned back to the counter and ordered black coffee and paid the bill.

With drinks in hand you made your way back to your table and settled in for an afternoon of art history. It went smoothly overall and Steve even got you to laugh a few times. He’d perfectly played his balance of pretending not to know about the subject while seeming to be learning what you were teaching. He could tell you felt proud of yourself for accomplishing something and he was happy he could make you feel that way. He was sure he was the only one that could.

You called it a day and said your goodbyes, you went in for an awkward hug which Steve accepted wholeheartedly. He’d even managed to finally snag your number so you two could work out more study times. Maybe you were coming around much easier than he anticipated. He smiled to himself and on the walk home began to devise a plan to get rid of Sean. It’d only be a matter of days if everything went accordingly.

____

You were basking in the rare day off, taking every moment to enjoy doing absolutely nothing. You’d felt drained lately from your class workload, late nights at the library, and your elevating fights with Sean. He was at work today followed by an evening class so you had uninterrupted alone time. Around 10pm it took every ounce of your free will to get off the couch and get the mail.

You milled over to your box and jammed the key in. Pulling the mail out your head titled in curiosity at the large unmarked manila folder. No return address written, only yours but there was nothing indicating whether it was for you or Sean. You’d open it when you got back upstairs.

Finally back to your spot on the couch your fingers slowly undid the folder’s metal clasp and you reached inside for its contents. Out came several photos and a hastily written note. You held the grainy photos closer to your face to make out what they were. When you did your heart plummeted and you went into emotional shock.

Though the photos were grainy it was very clear what they were of. Shots of Sean and some mystery brunette making out in a bar. Sean with his arm around her waist, Sean with his hand on her ass. All the photos were timestamped for only a few days ago when he claimed his soccer game was running late. You dropped them instantly and they scattered to the floor.

Your heart was hammering in your ears, you didn’t know what to think. Sean was the only boyfriend you’d ever really had, Sean loved you, you loved him. Somewhere in the back of your mind you remembered there was a note. You searched for it and tried to read it through the tears that were beginning to blur your vision.

‘I know what you did. You tell her or I will. You have three days’

You didn’t recognize the handwriting. Who would send this? Why would they send it? You and Sean didn’t have many friends and you couldn’t picture them doing this. Maybe this is some prank? Maybe the timestamp is wrong and this is before you were together.

Sean was all you’d ever known and you shared an apartment, it’s not like you’d have anywhere to go or anyone to turn to. Should you confront him with these? It’s not like you two were exactly good at solving your problems. Would he leave you if you showed him these? What then?

Your mind was spinning, unsure of what to do with this new information. Maybe you could keep quiet about this, try to spend some more time with Sean, make him see what the two of you have. Maybe you can ask him to be home more, maybe you could be home more too.

You took a deep breath and wiped your tears before you gathered the photos and put them back into the envelope. You decided you’d hold onto them for now, tucking them away in your drawer of the dresser. Deciding you’d just work yourself up if you stayed up you shot Sean a text goodnight and went to bed.

Morning came and he was snuggled into your side, the comfort you felt had you feeling like everything might be okay for a moment. You stayed in bed just a little longer and turned so he could hold you in his arms. Your heart felt so unsure and scared, but you didn’t know what else you could do.

The week passed by and you decided to shift more of your energy towards your relationship with Sean, pushing your nights at the library to the backburner. You still hadn’t told him about the envelope but you did tell him you missed him and wished he was home more. He relented and was home four nights this week instead of his usual two.

The time together was uncomfortable but you kept telling yourself that things were getting a little better over time, even if your studies were suffering for it. As the week went on you were able to suppress your doubts about your relationship a bit more. Sean loved you and you loved him.

You couldn’t ignore the oncoming threat of midterms forever, though. The last thing you wanted was to be alone because you knew that your thoughts would just spiral but you needed to do well this semester so you grabbed your bag and headed out.

You swipe through the doors, almost looking forward to seeing Steve. You’d blown off your study session with a profuse apology so you could be with Sean. You were eager to apologize in person but found the reference desk to be completely abandoned. You frowned, maybe Steve was putting away books or something. You’d see him eventually though, for now you had an essay to write.

Hours could have gone by and you wouldn’t have known. You were getting so much done though, it felt good to be focused on something other than your own thoughts.

“Where’ve you been?”

You jump in your seat. You turn around to find Steve emerging from the shelves that were just out of your view. He wore a neutral expression but you could cut the tension with a knife. He stepped forward and you debated on what to say.

“Sorry, I had to cancel with you this week. How are you getting along?”

“Nothing another tutoring session couldn’t fix, I’m sure. Were you sick? I feel like you haven’t been here in forever. The nights get awful lonely without ya here”

Why did Steve keep making statements like that when he knew you had a boyfriend? It was driving you insane and getting harder to ignore them.

“Um, no, I was with Sean, actually. But y’know, can’t avoid midterms forever” You gave a half-hearted laugh hoping to lighten things up.

Steve’s neutral expression is slipping, but you can’t tell if he’s angry or not. But his face broke out into a small smile, putting you at ease instantly. He clapped you on the shoulder and took a step back.

“Yeah, guess you’re right. We still on for Tuesday?”

You gave him an easy smile and nodded.

“I’ll be counting the days” With that Steve disappeared back between the shelves.

____

The moment Steve placed the envelope in the mail he felt a confidence he hadn’t felt before. All he had to do was wait for you to open the envelope and everything would take its course. He knew Sean was at work and you’d be the one to get the mail that day. From his spot he’d peered in your windows all those weeks ago he watched you open the photos. You dropped them to the ground and held a hand to your mouth to cover what looked like a sob. Steve smiled to himself, now all you had to do was leave him.

The week went on and Steve figured you might need a little time to break it off and he’d be there at the library, waiting to comfort you. It’s not like you had any other friends in your life to turn to. But then you cancelled your study session with no explanation. Steve figured maybe you were still in shock, needed to cry it out alone. Then two days turned to four turned to seven.

Steve was confused, he was infuriated even. Why hadn’t you come to the library yet? Why hadn’t you texted him? There’s no way that you were actually going to stay with him after you saw him with another woman. Except that’s exactly what he did.

Looking back on it Steve recognized his mistakes. He knew you were shy and meek, sweet, it’s what he loved about you. But he should’ve accounted for this to happen. You were too sweet for your own good, wanting to make it work with Sean. It was an obstacle he hadn’t seen but this is just a slight bump in the plan. He can work around it.

When he saw you coming up the steps on the security camera he made himself scarce, not ready to face you just yet. He gave you some hours to study before he made himself known to you. He could tell just by the way you talked that you were in complete denial about what was happening. You weren’t strong enough to leave him but that’s okay, Steve is strong enough for the both of you right now, he’ll help you get there.

____

Just when you thought things were getting better Sean was back to becoming distant, going out with his teammates and coming home still a little drunk. The more you thought about those photos and thought about how he slipped back into old habits so easily the more you were working up the courage to confront him. You weren’t sure if you’d leave him, but maybe it would make him change.

Then the second envelope came. More photos of them kissing and leaving the bar together. They were time stamped just two nights ago. Your heart fell through the floor as you tried to make sense of things. How much of this could you put up with? When was enough? You needed to confront him when he got home.

You texted him to try to come home early tonight, saying it was important. You spent the rest of the evening planning out your words and trying to quell the oncoming panic attacks. Time passed by in a blur and before you knew it it was midnight and you still had no word from Sean. You couldn’t spend one more minute alone, you needed to get out. You needed a friend.

Your body was on autopilot as your feet carried you up the steps of the library. Steve wasn’t at the desk and you felt almost distressed. You knew he’d be a good third party to talk all this out to and you didn’t know what to think when he wasn’t there. You decided to shoot him a text.

‘Hey, I know you usually work Thursdays, I’ll be at my usual spot, I could really use a friend if you’re not too busy��� Did that sound too desperate? At this point you didn’t care.

You sunk down into your chair on the second floor with a huff. You hadn’t brought your bag so it’s not like you could study to distract yourself. As it turned out you didn’t need to.

“I’m never too busy for you, doll. ‘Specially not at this job” Steve’s voice carried as he rounded a corner into your sight.

You felt instantly better before you realized you were crying. It was hard to be vulnerable but if you could trust anyone with this it was Steve. You gave him a weak smile as he pulled up a chair beside you.

“What’s wrong? Do you need tissues?”

“No, sorry, I just.” You were struggling to find the words. “Sean is cheating on me”

Steve’s hands clenched into fists, he looked absolutely furious for you.

“Are you serious? That bastard! Doll, I’m so sorry. Have you confronted him?” His hand reached for yours and his thumb rubbed light circles.

“I-I, I haven’t said...anything. I just. He loves me y’know? Why would he do that? He’s all I have? What happens if he leaves me where will I stay I’ll be completely alone, I’ll-”

You had worked yourself into a panic attack as you desperately tried to take gulps of air while tears streamed down your face. You were losing touch with your surroundings and spiraling into a place you couldn’t get yourself out of. Steve moved his chair closer to you and brought you into his lap. He held your back to his chest and wrapped his arms around you. You could just make out what he was saying.

“Doll, it’s okay, I need you to breathe with me, can you do that? Take a deep breath in with me. Hold it and count to five with me,” You do but you’re still struggling. “Now exhale, count again for me. You’re doing so well, you can do this.”

Eventually Steve is able to bring you back down to Earth and you slumped back into his arms. You don’t care that Steve is holding you, it feels safe. You shifted so you could lean your head against his chest and let out a heavy sigh. He holds you to himself and lets you sit there for a while.

You don’t know how much time passes but you sit up slowly and he’s reluctant to let you go. You wipe your eyes as you go back to your own chair.

“Sorry, I’m keeping you from your job. Sorry I just totally came here and freaked out” You were starting to feel embarrassed, oversharing your life and emotions with him. You really liked him, you didn’t want to think you’d ruined the friendship.

“Don’t even apologize. You can always come to me.” He gave you a warm smile and you felt reassured. “So what are you going to do about Sean?”

Another hour had gone by with Steve and you could see the sun starting to come through the windows. You had decided you would confront him and go from there. You weren’t ready to fully commit to leaving him but this needed to end one way or another. For the first time in two weeks you felt like things were maybe going to be okay. The next time you saw Sean you were going to confront him.

____

Clearly seeing that you weren’t going to do anything after he sent the photos, he had to go to plan B. Steve waited outside the practice field and followed him to the parking structure once again. He jammed the parking stub in his jacket pocket along with the others and repeated his previous trips here. It was astounding how unaware Sean was of his surroundings, Steve had followed him and that girl from the bar back to her place at least twice now.

Getting what he needed he put another envelope in the mail the next day, this time with no note but the photos were more upsetting. It hurt Steve to hurt you but it’s what needed to be done. You were never going to confront him with things as they were so he had to push the envelope, literally and metaphorically. The hurt would be worth it though, because you came crying to him just like he’d hoped you would. Seeing your text warmed his heart, you needed him and he’d be there. Every time.

He knew he’d be comforting you but he didn’t think that he’d get to hold you. He was hiding his smile as he wrapped his arms around you and brought you down from your panic attack. You did so well listening to him and calming down. He was convinced he was the only one that could help you, you just needed to see that.

Steve abandoned his cart of books that needed to be shelved but he couldn’t care less. He’d stay up all night with you every night if that’s what it took. As dawn broke the two of you devised a plan and he built you up to say something. You weren’t committed to leaving him, which Steve wasn’t happy about, but you were committed to confronting him, if only you’d get the chance.

Based on what Steve knew of both yours and Sean's schedules you’d just miss each other between classes during the day and Sean had a game tonight, which would inevitably lead to a night at the bar. All Steve had to do was wait. He had to contain his excitement, things were finally finally falling right into place, they just needed a final push.

Nightfall came and this time Steve beat Sean to the structure. Steve parked on the top level and stuck the parking stub in his pocket. He didn’t feel like he was taking a risk by counting on Sean to follow routine, he was a good boy, he’d park in his same spot he always did and proceed to get wasted across the street.

A slow smile creeped across Steve’s face as Sean and his teammates stumbled into the bar, probably already drunk from pre-gaming. Sean’s sidepiece wouldn’t come to the bar tonight, her sorority having some dumb mixer or another. Steve reminded himself of his mantra to wait. His phone buzzed and he saw it was a text from you. You two had been texting after you came to him in the library.

‘He’s not responding to my texts. I know he had a game tonight but I really thought he’d be here’

He’d have to text you back another time, Steve needed to be on his toes tonight. He sat at what was becoming his usual booth for nearly two hours, barely touching his pint. Finally Sean paid his tab and said goodnight to his friends. Steve pulled down the brim of his hat and pursued him towards the parking structure. Drunken and fumbling up through the stairwell, Steve entered behind him quietly while taking out a knife he’d stolen from Bucky. He always knew his friend’s strange obsession with them would come in handy someday.

Just as Sean was about to take the final step Steve grabbed him from behind. Sean’s reactions may have been slowed but it hadn’t stopped him trying to thrash out of the grip. His efforts stopped immediately as Steve held the blade to his throat. He spoke clearly and in a low voice.

“Keep walking up the stairs or I will slit your fucking throat, do you hear me?” He brought the knife closer to his neck to drive home the threat.

“E-easy man, please, please don’t do this”

“Keep moving. Up.”

Steve pushed him all the way towards his car at the edge of the top level. He flipped Sean around so his back was to the ledge, the knife still trained closely on him. Pleads for mercy fell on deaf ears.

“What do you wan’!? You wan’ money!? Take, take my wallet man I don’t need it, jus’ please don’t kill me please!”

Steve pushed him slightly, though his grip on him remained tight. Sean struggled against him as his body weight wavered over the ledge. He must have realised how far up they were because he started crying at this point, begging even harder as he teetered and trying desperately to get his bearings against the wall.

“Why are you doing this!?” He wailed, “I’ll do anything, please! Please, I have a girlfriend, I have a family”

That was all that it took. Steve was feeling a high like he’d never felt. He knew at this moment he was doing the right thing for both of you. With a rush of adrenaline and in a flash of certainty he pushed Sean’s body over the edge. He didn’t watch him fall the seven stories down to the ground, but he did wait to hear the sickening crack and thud of his body hitting the ground. There was no way he’d survived.

Blood rushing through his ears, he felt euphoric, so powerful, so in love with you. He climbed back into his car and headed for his apartment. His plan wasn’t quite complete yet though, but everything he needed to do was done. He could watch the rest unfold from the sidelines. He knows you’ll be heartbroken all over again when you find out, but he’ll be there to pick up the pieces.

____

You’d been in mourning for nearly two months. The shock you’d felt wasn’t comparable to any other feeling you’d felt. The police ultimately ruled his death an accident, they performed an autopsy and found dangerous amounts of alcohol in his system. They weren’t able to pinpoint an exact time of death but estimated 2-3 AM, as he’d been found in the morning. They figured he’d just gotten piss drunk and came too close to the edge. And he was gone just like that.

His death weighed heavy on you, you blamed yourself for a long time. He wouldn’t have stayed out if you hadn’t pushed him so far away from you. The last thing you ever said to him was nagging and whiny, no wonder he didn’t want to come home. To think that you were possibly going to leave him. You felt so much self-contempt but slowly you were learning to forgive yourself.

You don’t know what you’d have done without Steve by your side. He was there for you every step of the way. He held you at the funeral, he helped you pack up Sean’s things in the apartment, he took your late night phone calls and came over at the drop of a hat to help you through your grief. You were eternally grateful for his selflessness and his willingness to help you heal.

Guilt loomed over you once again as the old feelings you’d had for Steve in the early days of your friendship started to flare up again. It felt natural to feel them, with him being closer to you than he ever was, but it didn’t stop you from feeling shame over it. You had to remind yourself that you weren’t culpable for anything that happened, that Sean himself was interested in someone else when he’d died. You had to forgive yourself for these feelings for Steve. Maybe even pursue them.

‘Can you come over tonight? I think we should talk’ Your nerves were on fire from the rush you got sending him that text.

‘How about you come to my place? 7? We can go for something to eat if you want.’ Your heart was fluttering, was this a date?

‘Sounds good :)’

Checking the time you saw it was 4, you spent the next few hours obsessing over what to say. No matter what you were determined to tell him your feelings for him. You were debating whether or not you should kiss him. Would he even want you back? What if he only sees you as a friend now? The hours whiled away and you took a deep breath before setting out.

You’d been to Steve’s apartment only once before, you knew he lived alone but he’d managed to make the place feel homey. You were buzzed in and before you had the chance to knock on the door Steve had it open and was waiting for you. His smile was all teeth and it was contagious, you smiled back looking up at him and he let you in.

You sat down on the couch and waited for Steve. No turning back now. Deep breath. He sat down and turned to face you.

“What did you want to talk about?”

No words were coming to you. Your mouth opened but you could only sputter. Oh God, where were the words? Do something!

So you did. Before you could think about it you put a shaky hand up to Steve’s jaw and pulled him in for a kiss. You didn’t know what you were feeling, you were just waiting for Steve to respond. You began to pull back but before you could he took your face in his hands and kissed you back tenderly but with purpose. Your arms were around him and he pulled you closer into his lap to kiss you more passionately.

You finally pulled apart to catch your breath. You snuck a look up to his face and you were nervous but you felt like you were floating.

“You have… no idea how long I’ve wanted to do that” He said between breaths.

You two smiled like idiots and he brought his lips to yours again. The kiss deepened and a moan slipped from your mouth. This seemed to spark something in Steve and his hands shakily moved over your body. He was feeling every curve of you and you ground down into his lap and his hips bucked up in response. You have no idea where this confidence came from but you’d never felt more sure of yourself. You broke apart again and Steve was breathing heavily.

“Is this what you want?” He asked. You could only nod before he was on you again. He pulled you up from the couch and led you to his bed. This time he laid you back and was hovering over you, slowly undoing the buttons of your jeans. You helped him get yourself out of them and pulled your shirt over your head, leaving you in just your bra and panties. How was this happening? Who cares?

He sat back and took the sight of you in, he was looking at you like you were the most precious thing. He slowly removed his clothes and moved back over you, kissing his way up your thighs before pulling your panties down your legs. He continued laving away at your skin, making you nervous but excited. His fingers brushed your core and he brought them up to his face.

“Sweetheart, you are dripping.” Your cheeks heated instantly as he chuckled. Not giving you the chance to respond he dove right in. Two fingers entered you and you arched your back, his tongue lapped up your wetness and then at your clit. You’d really never known pleasure like this, no one had ever done this for you before. His fingers pumped in and out of you and your hands flew to his hair and pulled. He continued on and curved his fingers just slightly and you clenched down around him, you were so close.

“Please, I’m so close” you whimpered.

Steve doubled his efforts and before you knew it the tension he had been building up was released in a white hot flash of ecstasy. You writhed against his fingers as he kept pumping them into you. Finally he relented, pulling them out and licking them clean. You’d never seen something that made you feel so filthy but so so good.

He took off his boxers and encased you in his arms. He kissed your neck and you moaned again at the feeling. You spread yourself for him and he lined himself up and groaned. The stretch was something you weren’t ready for. It burned almost, you cried out as he put his whole length in you. He waited all of two seconds before he began thrusting into you. You weren’t ready but you were adjusting quickly with the way his cock hit that spot inside of you over and over.

You were holding onto his shoulders, nails digging in deep as he started to go harder and faster.

“I’m close” He panted into your ear.

Reaching down his fingers found your clit and started moving back and forth quickly, trying to match his thrusts. The tension was building again to a breaking point and you were getting close again. He worked you even harder until you broke, cumming for a second time. Your eyes were screwed shut in ecstasy as you cried again.

“Steve!”

That was all it took before he slammed into you a final time, you could feel his release and you’d never felt closer to him. His movements stopped and your noses touched. He kissed you hard before rolling off of you.

“That was… oh my god” you breathed.

“I know, me too” Steve chuckled. “So can I take you to dinner?”

“Nothing would make me happier,” You grinned wide and nodded.

You cleaned yourself up and redressed. You were taking in Steve’s room and found yourself smiling at the photos of him and Bucky, little knick-knacks on his dresser. You found a sticky note on the calendar at his desk. You squinted. Had you seen his handwriting before?

You shrugged and flopped yourself back on the bed. You checked the weather on your phone and frowned at the temperature, you let out a small groan.

“What is it?” Steve called from the bathroom as he cleaned up.

“It’s so coooold and I forgot my jacket” You pouted.

“Just take mine, it’s the brown leather one hanging in the living room” He was so sweet.

Gingerly, you made your way into the living room and found the jacket, slipping it on. You don’t know what was taking Steve so long but you shoved your hands in the pockets and waited for him. You felt something in the right pocket. Is this trash? You pulled out little wadded up pieces of paper and unfolded them.

They were parking stubs. They were from the same structure that Sean had fallen from. Your heart was pounding, upset just thinking of him. Looking closer one of them was stamped for 2:15 AM, 2/1, the night that he died. Okay...

1 AM 1/15, 11:57PM 1/28, They matched the timestamp on the photos that had been sent to you. Two others were from nights when Sean had games and had stayed out late. Your heart was in your throat and tears were forming in your eyes, trying to find some explanation. You thought again of the first time you’d received an envelope, those photos, that note. It had dawned on you why the note looked so familiar… The handwriting! Oh, God... Your whole world slowed down as you heard footsteps bound into the room. Slowly you turned, the stubs still in your shaking hands.

“Oh, Sweetheart,” Steve took a step further, “You weren’t supposed to see those.”

[wolvesandpetals]

Loki x Sylvie Playing House Part 3 (Humor, Romance), Rated T. Full on Sylki hijinks, as promised!

Masterlist of my Sylki fanfics here.

---

The first thing she does when Thor leaves is Google herself. Apparently, she was a child actor and made a fortune there, before transitioning into modelling, and later into a successful influencing career.

"That makes perfect sense to me", Loki comments. "If I was not a prince, I would have chosen to be an actor too. Just imagine, legions of fans screaming your name, begging for your attention for just one moment, hanging onto your every word, willing to worship the very ground you walk on. Now, that is the dream." He pauses, cherishing the image in his head. "There's also the money. Looks like you and I will never have to work a day in our lives. We can just live off your money."

[[MORE]]

Sylvie feels the muscles in her laws instinctively tense. This is not her life, or her reality. She can't imagine spending eternity here. She looks at Loki sternly. "We can not. We have to return to the TVA."

"Yes, of course." He agrees immediately. A part of him likes this life. But another part of him knows there is never a gain without a loss. The universe finds a way to make him pay for every bit of happiness he ever gets. Who knows what the price may be if he chooses to stay, with his family, and with Sylvie right here?

Sylvie sets down the laptop on the bedside table, ignoring the danger of Loki's glass being knocked over and drenching it. She cannot let herself be concerned with such simple things. Ignoring them is the surest way to covince herself she hates it here. "I was wondering, if Thor can get into this town, and if he remembers us leaving this town in the past, does it mean we are free to leave?"

Loki studies her features, the resolute glint in her eyes and the defiant stance of her chin. It is clear that she will stop at nothing to get back to the TVA. "We should test it out." He says, trying to sound as calm as possible. "Where do you wanna go?"

"Maybe we can go to Oklahoma? See my supposed parents?" She attempts to play it off like it's nothing, even though she knows exactly what it means- temptation. The urge to see what this life looks like is ever-growing.

"Why can't we go to Asgard and see my parents instead?" He counters immediately.

Sylvie purses her lips, trying not to reveal her emotions. She doesn't remember her Odin or Frigga at all. A part of her longs to meet this version of them, but another part wonders how overwhelming it would feel, watching Loki occupy her place, have her life, her "parents" in this timeline. "Fine. How about we pick a neutral location first?"

"Fine." He replies curtly.

"Fine!" Her irritation escalates. She grabs the laptop again, opening up a tab to a travel website, ready to book a flight.

"LA?" He suggests.

"You just want the paparazzi attention, don't you?" She points out, but doesn't resist. "Alright."

September 1st. The date is set. They will be off to LA within three days, and if whatever being that has placed them here does not want them to leave, they will know by then.

---

"Do you really need all of these sunglasses?" Sylvie asks, after Loki stashes the fifth one in his backpack.

"Of course, I do." He defends. "Style? Remember?"

"Travelling light, remember?" She hits back, taking out two random pairs and throwing them back on her dresser. "Just take what you absolutely need."

"I absolutely need my sunglasses." He says stubbornly.

She can either give in on this trivial matter, or she can dig her heels in and fight it out with him. A stupid pair of sunglasses is not worth the effort. "Fine." And in return, there's something that he has to compromise for her as well. "Only if you help me get my swords past security."

"With pleasure." He says with a grin, and with a wave of his hand, the newly arrived swords from eBay are magically cloaked.

Sylvie looks at her own luggage. She has never really owned anything. She jumped from one apocalypse to another, with only her life, and sometimes food supplies for a few days. It feels surreal to look at the clothes in her wardrobe now. The thought of carrying them with her feels even more foreign.

She looks at the tons of products on her dresser, skin creams, lotions, toners, cleansers and heaven knows what else. All the luxuries she never had.

All the luxuries she does not want.

"I'll just pack a change of clothes." She says finally.

"You don't want anything else?" He asks, surprised.

"These are just things, Loki." She explains. "They can be replaced. I have no attachment to them."

---

She regrets not booking first class. She has been on planes before, using crashing aircrafts as a temporary hideout spot to regroup when the TVA was on her tails. As a stowaway, she never realized just how annoying a plane journey can actually be.

Loki graciously offers her the window seat, noting her unease as soon as they board. She thanks him with a smile, and they nod in mutual understanding.

She stares out of the window, at the town that is supposedly her home, and for the first time ever, she feels a pang of homesickness for a place that is not Asgard. She has been here for just five days now, yet, the thought of sleeping in her own bed is so tempting.

Sylvie notices how she is thinking of the bed as her bed now, but tries not to dwell on it too much.

The plane takes off without incidence, and she dozes off quickly. When she wakes up, she notices a thin comforter wrapped around her shoulders. Turning to her side, she sees Loki sleeping as well, his mouth slightly agape. She snuggles close to him, suddenly needing the comfort of his warmth, and the woman on the aisle seat gives her a dirty look. There's a baby crying somewhere in the back, and what feels like the beginning of a massive headache. But all that fades away when she lays her head on his shoulder.

---

When the flight arrives at LAX, they are both a little scared to leave its comfort. They are about to find out if they are free to travel wherever they want, or whether the action had any consequence. Sylvie is the first to take a step out, and they are both relieved to see nothing happens. The baggage claim goes smoothly, though slowly, and they get a cab quickly. Sylvie hides her grin when she sees Loki put on his sunglasses.

"So we're here." He says, staring at Sylvie, while she stares out of the window.

She only hums in response.

"Is this your honeymoon?" The driver asks.

Loki laughs nervously. "No, no. We've been married for quite a long time. This is just... a vacation."

The driver recommends them a lot of tourist places. Sylvie tunes him out. This is just a test. She has no interest in touring LA. They have their return flight scheduled for the next day.

They check into their hotel room, and she plops down on the bed immediately. "It seems we are free to leave the town. Just not the reality, I suppose." She runs her hands over the silky sheets, amused. "I must say, whoever placed us here has taken every measure to make this prison comfortable."

Loki follows suit and takes a seat beside her. "I suppose that is indeed generous of him. Or her."

Sylvie turns to the side to look at him. "So how do we get out of here then? Got any plan?"

He shrugs. It's not like there's a book called What to do when you find yourself trapped in an alternate universe with your alternate self for Dummies. "Right now, the plan is to get some dinner, then some sleep. Then perhaps in the morning we can see a bit of LA?"

"You want to play tourist?" She asks in a neutral tone.

He replies in kind, testing the waters. "We are here already, and we have the time, so why not?"

"Okay." She replies, a little unsure, but not entirely opposed to the idea. The weariness of the journey starts taking its toll on her. She messages her temples with her fingertips. "Should we order room service?"

Loki contemplates for a moment. On the one hand, she looks really tired, and she could use a good night's sleep. On the other hand, she has been completely on edge and razor focused on the mission since they got in this mess. Well, since they met, actually, and probably for centuries before that. She could also use a bit of fun and relaxation.

With that in mind, he carefully voices his proposal. "I was thinking maybe we can go down to the restaurant and have a proper dinner."

Sylvie looks up, grinning mischievously. She's about to call his bluff. "What, like a date?" His deer-in-the-headlights reaction makes her laugh. "Calm down, I'm just teasing you."

---

It's not a date, but it kind of is. It's a four course meal and a fine bottle of champagne over candlelight, after all.

"Was it like this? Back at Asgard?" Sylvie wonders.

"Mostly. But Asgard was grand, elegant. This is..."

"A cheap replacement." She completes.

Loki smiles. "Precisely."

They talk about their Asgard bedrooms, the similarities and the differences between their safe haven in the palace. An hour passes swiftly.

"The wine is good." Sylvie comments, sipping on her first glass of wine, when the champagne is drained.

"Yes, quite good." Loki agrees, on his first glass as well.

The tiniest buzz starts to take root in him, and his mind wanders into the realm of possibilities, the future he can have, here and now. His eyes focus on the brighest object in front of him- Sylvie.

She feels her cheeks flush under his gaze. "Why are you looking at me like that?"

"You are just so..." He blinks. What is another word for Asgard's Sun when it disappears into the azure lakes? "Breathtaking"

Her lips curve into a shy smile. This is the beginning of the same foolishness he showed on the train in Lamentis-1 that almost got them killed. But right now, their life isn't in imminent danger. Right now, she is just amused. "Wow, you really can't hold your liquor, can you?"

"Of course I can. I am Loki, Prince of Asgard." He declares proudly.

"Yes, yes, I've heard the speech." She says it with a smile and an eye-roll. "We should get you upstairs."

He objects immediately. "But I'm not done yet."

"Oh, I think you're quite done." She beckons the nearest waiter. "Can we get the bill, please?"

He can still walk surprisingly well, but she holds his hand tightly, just in case he decides to take a detour, and drags him into the elevator.

"Blonde looks good on you." He comments out of the blue. "Maybe I should go blonde too."

She grins. "Like Thor?"

He glares at her. "You're a buzzkill."

---

Sylvie opens the door after fumbling with the keys for a minute. She is starting to feel the effect of the alcohol as well. She takes off her shoes and her earrings, while Loki runs to the loo.

"Why did you book a room for two?" He asks in a serious tone, leaning against the door-frame of the bathroom.

Sylvie freezes, her hand hanging mid-air for five uncomfortable seconds before she awkwardly drops it to her side.

Why did she book a room for two? She could have just rented separate rooms, or at least ones with separate beds. It's not like she and Loki are actually together.

But they have been. At least for the past few days. Why do they need separate rooms here when they share a bed back home?

Home. Sylvie realises with alarm that she's thinking of her prison as her home.

Is this reality starting to mess with her mind now?

"It's okay, I don't want to leave you either." Loki's voice pulls her out of her inner monologue. She turns around quickly in his direction. He's still drunk, and it shows, but he has a look on his face that she has never seen before- a mix of resolution and fondless. His eyes whisper silent vows of loyalty, and something else, something he can't quite express yet. "I will never leave you."

Sylvie smiles, closing the distance between them and standing next to him. Her hand finds his by sheer instinct. "Good to know."

"I mean it, Sylvie." He gives her hand a reassuring squeeze, before he tugs her along with him as he sits down on the bed, unable to stand any longer in his inebriated state. She is grateful to be seated too, and she's unsure whether it is just the alcohol. "I know you hate it here. But I like this." He indicates at her, then at himself, then back at her. "I like falling asleep next to you, and walking into the kitchen first thing every morning to see you cursing at the microwave. I like how you hum in the shower and scream at the TV."

Sylvie listens quietly, her eyes focused on the feeling of his hand in hers. She is trying to memorize this moment, burn the shape of his fingers and the feel of his touch into her brain, so that when it's gone- when he is gone- like everything in her life always is, she will have another good memory to relive again and again.

Loki continues. "I like the way you burn the pasta every time you try to cook."

"I don't burn the whole dish." She retorts playfully. "Just the bottom part."

He shakes his head to show he disagrees. "Can I tell you a secret?"

Her heartbeat quickens. Is he going to confess that he has feelings for her?

Does he have feelings for her?

"Sure." She barely whispers back.

Loki double-checks. "Promise me that you will never tell yourself?"

She laughs softly. "I promise."

Loki tenses, suddenly looking sober. He lets go of her hand, to rest his by his side, his fingers clenched into a fist. Mastering all his courage, he finally speaks. "I don't want to leave. Ever. I like it here."

Sylvie looks away, suddenly needing air. Hearing Loki say that makes her feel irrationally angry. He promised to be on her side every step of the way, but the minute he finds a life he likes, he's ready to throw in the towel.

A part of the anger stems from the fact that she knows, a major reason he wants to stay is her, this life he has with her. Two Lokis on any other timeline will cause Nexus events. But here, they are free to be together. Timelines don't start branching off like a growing vine on timelapse video every time they touch. And he wants that. She knows this because he has all but said it with his words and his actions.

And because she wants it too. Damn it, she wants it so much. She is getting sucked into this reality, indeed.

But she knows she has to finish what she started- she owes it to herself, and to the people out there who need her help, who will be robbed of their lives if she doesn't stop whoever is doing this.

She wants to-

- But she can't.

"Loki, I-" she stops when she turns around to see he has already fallen asleep. Wordlessly, she wraps the comforter over his sleeping form, before crawling under it herself. Turning to her side, facing away from him, she wonders what's next for them.

[obwjam]

the tiniest jedi: the hidden enemy, part 2

a/n: part two is here!!! i completely lost my focus in the middle of this but i finally was able to crank it out lmao this was originally going to be three parts but it’s gonna be four now or else this chapter would be like 8k words and uhh no thank u sir

>> part one

——————-

Rex had never felt this awkward in his short life. He did trust General Skywalker. He was programmed to follow orders. And despite the shock of seeing someone so small, he believed that the Jedi wouldn’t send someone to the front who wasn’t fully capable of handling themselves.

And yet, doubt nagged at the back of his mind. It didn’t really compute how someone so tiny could fight like Anakin. Or Obi-Wan. Or… any Jedi, really.

But above all, Rex had a duty to lead his men. If this General Nor’al was their commanding officer for the day, then he was going to respect it. Even if the rest of the 501st griped about it, he knew they would ultimately fall in line and do their duty.

He just hoped he wouldn’t have to bring back any bad news.

Briefing his ARC troopers went about as well as he expected it to. They were a little confused at first, wondering why Rex was pinching his fingers in such a way when he described the new general, and there were skeptical faces when he went over the plan.

“So you two will be on standby here and here, laying down cover fire while I get her as close to the tank as possible,” Rex explained. “At my word, we rendezvous here and Hawk will pick us up with the gunship.”

“Sounds like a good plan,” said one trooper. “But the catch is…”

“...she’s about as tall as a kriffing Zilkin,” another finished.

Rex cleared his throat, snapping his men back to attention. “Look, I know it’s a bit of a… strange situation. But General Skywalker is counting on us to make this work, and the information we get from that droid will save countless lives. It’s important that we execute this plan flawlessly.”

As Rex went to meet Obi-Wan and Jayla, he could only wonder how Cody was handling it all. Even though he wouldn’t be part of the stealth mission, he was no doubt aware that this tiny Jedi existed. Well, if Cody can look past the obvious, Rex thought, then I can too.

“Well, that went better than I was expecting.”

Jayla rolled her eyes at Obi-Wan’s comment as she stretched out on a small section of the table in a break room. Cody was leaning against the corner of the wall, helmet off. Obi-Wan insisted he be there while they wait.

“Are you kidding? That might have been the most awkward interaction I’ve ever had in my life,” Jayla sighed. “That’s saying a lot, you know.”

“Aw, cut him some slack,” Cody shrugged. “He was caught off-guard.”

Obi-Wan cracked a smile. “We owe that one to Anakin.”

“As much as I love blaming him, you did the exact same thing when I first met Cody,” Jayla tutted, standing up. “Remember that, Cody? It wasn’t that weird, was it?”

Cody snickered. In his mind, it was that weird, but he wasn’t going to admit it. It was sometime after the Battle of Geonosis, he couldn’t quite remember when. He didn’t participate, but he could feel the pain in the quavers of his brothers’ voices whenever they discussed it in passing.

It was strange that Obi-Wan wanted to meet him outside of the battlefield, and even stranger that their meeting place was the Jedi temple. Did he want to discuss battle strategy? Expectations? Requirements? He wasn’t made for small talk.

He glanced nervously around the halls as he knocked on a door he hoped was the right one. He could hear mumbling.

“Do come in,” a prim voice called out from the other side. Oh great. He’s one of these Jedi.

Cody walked in cautiously, unsure of who and what to expect. Obi-Wan was sitting cross-legged on a pillow with his back to the door. There was a knee-high table in front of him with two cups on either side. Obi-Wan was talking, too softly to make out, and presumably, to himself. Cody raised an eyebrow.

“Sorry, sir, if this is a bad time…” he stared, but Obi-Wan held his hand up.

“Not at all. I should have warned you that we might have a guest.”

Cody was about to open his mouth when he caught something in the corner of his eye. Something was moving on the table.

Cody’s hand flew to his blaster and he cocked it up in seconds. “Sir, don’t move. There’s something--”

“Commander!” Obi-Wan huffed as he stood swiftly. Cody’s eager eyes darted from Obi-Wan to the table, where… where a very, very small person was standing being a cup, wielding a lightsaber. Looking like a deer in headlights, Cody lowered his blaster.

“Sir--” Cody started, taking a step forward. He stopped when he saw the tiny figure flinch.

“Jay, it’s alright,” Obi-Wan said softly, taking a knee beside the table. “I asked him here.”

“That’s one of the clones?” the tiny girl asked warily, glancing up at Cody, whose face was bright red.

“This is Commander Cody, my new second-in-command,” Obi-Wan stated. “He’ll be leading the 212th Attack Battalion.”

“Oh.” She put away her lightsaber as Cody put his blaster back in its holster. “I-I’m Jayla Nor’al. I’m Master Yoda’s padawan.” She took a few shaky steps from behind the cup. “I’m sorry for the scare.”

Cody blinked. “It--it’s alright. Sorry about the blaster.”

Obi-Wan smiled. “Well, now that that’s all out of the way. Why don’t you take a seat, Commander. I hope you like tea.”

Cody smirked at the memory. “You Jedi sure have a thing for surprises,” he said cheekily. “Just give Rex some time. He’s a good soldier. He’ll get over it quickly.”

“I just hope he trusts me out there,” Jayla mumbled.

“Oh, I have no doubt he will,” Obi-Wan reassured. “The question is, will you trust him?”

Jayla’s eyes fell to the table. She hated the way Obi-Wan seemed to read her mind at the most inopportune times.

She didn’t get a lot of time to dwell on it as the door whooshed open and Rex cantered in. He first noticed Cody before his eyes fell right to Jayla. I should probably stop staring now.

“Captain,” Obi-Wan smiled as Rex removed his helmet. “Thank you for joining us.”

“Of course, sir,” Rex said stiffly. Seeing him with his helmet off, Jayla wasn’t sure what to make of him. If they were all, well, clones… why did this one look so different? Maybe it was the blond hair, or how worn down he looked. Or maybe it was the slight wideness of the eyes and the small pursing of his lips.

“I thought it would be beneficial for us to go over the plan once more in a quieter space,” Obi-Wan started. Rex, who was deliberately staring at the wall ahead of him to avoid looking down, broke his concentration when he could feel the heat of Obi-Wan’s gaze on him. “Captain, do you have a map of the terrain?”

“Yes sir,” Rex said, pulling the holoprojector from his belt. Without thinking, he set it down on the table. His eyes flashed down in concern, but Jayla calmly took a few steps back and found her way to Obi-Wan’s hand again.

“Well, the tac droid will be in this tank here,” Rex pointed. “It’s always the most heavily guarded, but we suspect they’ll be more clankers around it than usual.”

“My battalion and the rest of the attack squad will be over here, pushing through on the main road to the city,” Cody said as the map widened. “They’ll be hundreds of us. The chance of them noticing a few men splitting off is low.”

“General Nor’al, you’ll be with me,” Rex said. “I, uh, I don’t know exactly where you’d like to, uh, ride… but once you finish getting the information we need, meet me at the extraction point here. Hawk will come down with a gunship and we’ll be on our way.”

Jayla cleared her throat as Obi-Wan handed her a comically large piece of tech. “When I get in, I have to disable the tac droid first or else it’s gonna be impossible to do anything. Its weakness is in its neck, so as long as it’s engaged, I’ll be able to scale it without it noticing.” She heaved up the piece of tech, which was about the size of a rotary blaster to her. These were the moments that Obi-Wan tried hard not to smile and Jayla tried hard not to get flustered. “I’m going to plug into the droid at the base of its head. It shouldn’t take more than a few minutes for the download. I’ll cut a hole out the back of the tank and meet you for extraction,” she finished, glancing up at Rex. His face was stoic.

“Well, I think we’ve got a good grasp on this,” Obi-Wan said with a smirk. “Must be a nice change of pace for you, Captain. You hardly ever get the chance to follow a plan.”

“Whatever I need to do, General,” Rex replied. He jumped a little when Cody appeared next to him and put his hand on his shoulder.

“If you don’t mind, Generals, we’ll head down to the hangar for our equipment check,” Cody said. Obi-Wan nodded.

“Thank you, sirs,” Rex said, his gaze lingering on Jayla for a few extra seconds. Rex didn’t need the powers of the Force to know they were both thinking the same thing about each other. The signs of apprehension were universal. But for him, at least, the moment he stepped onto the battlefield was the moment his mind went blank and he was only concerned with achieving one goal. If she had the respect of both Kenobi and Skywalker, then what was the source of his unease? Why couldn’t he stop thinking about her, staring at her, worrying about her?

He was glad Cody got him out of there.

“So,” Obi-Wan said when the two clones left. “Where are you going to ride?”

“I was really trying not to think about that,” Jayla groaned. “You know, you didn’t have to bring him in to go over the plan again. I’m the one who came up with it.”

“You can never be too prepared.”

Jayla took a shaky breath. “And do I really have to go on the gunship with everyone? I don’t want anyone to stare.”

“How else are you planning on getting down to the planet’s surface? A free fall?”

“I think I’d rather,” she mumbled. “Well, do I have to--”

“--you can stay with me until we reach the ground,” Obi-Wan assured, his face softening. “It’s alright.”

Jayla released a breath she had been holding and plopped down, leaning against the curl of Obi-Wan’s fingers.

“Rex is one of the finest,” he said in a hushed voice. “He’ll take good care of you out there.”

“I’m not the one who needs taking care of,” she snapped. “I’m fine.”

“I can sense your worry.”

Jayla sighed. There really was no fooling Obi-Wan. “I just… I don’t want to mess up. I don’t want to… I want to make sure everyone gets back alright, you know? This is my mission. I’m responsible.”

Obi-Wan furrowed his brow. He figured the completion of the mission would have been her main focus. Gently, he raised the index finger on his free hand and stroked Jayla’s back. She flinched at his touch, but quickly melted into it. “As a Jedi, you are more than capable. As a leader, there are few who can inspire people like you do.” He paused to let her smile. “There are things in war you can’t control. Casualties are one of them. The men you lead in battle today will not be the same as the ones tomorrow.”

Jayla couldn’t find anything to say.

“You’ve gone over this one plan more times in the last thirty minutes than Anakin has with any plan his whole life.” That one earned a full laugh from her. “And when things inevitably go wrong, you will adapt. You are ready for this.”

Jayla looked up and met Obi-Wan’s clear blue eyes. In them, she only saw admiration. In him, she only felt confidence. She cracked a small smile, sat up and folded her legs criss-cross. She closed her eyes. The Force pulsed excitedly around her.

She was ready.

—-

“How’d’you know her so well, anyway?”

Rex and Cody were just about at the hangar bay, and Rex was eager to know why she seemed to trust being around Cody but shied away from him.

“General Kenobi does a lot of negotiating in addition to his fighting,” Cody laughed. “She’s with him quite a lot on those trips. I imagine it’s deliberate on his part. Gets her used to being around clones and all that.”

“Well, that explains why I’ve never met her before,” Rex snickered. “General Skywalker never negotiates.”

Cody smirked. “But I wouldn’t say I know her well. She… doesn’t take to people very easily. Still has never let me take her anywhere, despite my plentiful offers. I’ve only ever seen her with Kenobi or Skywalker.”

“Must be a Jedi thing,” Rex snorted. Of course she has a thing against clones.

“Well, if the Jedi are all she’s ever known, I can’t say I blame her,” Cody countered. He could easily see Rex’s irritation in the form of his clenched fists. “The galaxy is not built for people her size. Especially a galaxy at war.”

Rex hummed. He had… never really thought of it that way. “Have you seen her in action before?”

“A few times, when negotiations went south. She moves quicker than anyone I’ve ever seen, that’s for sure. And if she gets scared, she doesn’t show it. I don’t think I’d be able to do what she does if everyone towered over me like a kriffing building.”

Rex pursed his lips, trying to visualize for the first time what it might look like if his brothers stood a hundred feet taller than him. He shivered at the thought.

“Rex? You alright, vod?”

Cody had stopped walking. They were at the hangar. Red swallowed.

“I’m… I guess I’m just surprised someone so small could be such a powerful Jedi.”

“Trust me,” Cody said, slipping his helmet on, “you’re not the only one.”

Rex humphed as he followed suit, joining his small group of ARCs near the larger 501st. Close by were Obi-Wan and Anakin, chatting amongst themselves. He almost didn’t notice Jayla on Obi-Wan’s shoulder, legs swinging as she laughed at something Anakin said. Well, she certainly looks happier.

“Just hang on tight, and you’ll have nothing to worry about!” Anakin said as they climbed into the gunship.

“There’s a reason I’m trusting Obi-Wan instead of you here,” Jayla snipped, regaining her balance as Obi-Wan reached his arm up to grab a handle. “He wouldn’t jerk his shoulder really hard to make sure I was secure enough.”

“Are you telling me he’s not preparing you properly? That’s interesting.”

“Tell me why they stuck me on this mission with both of you,” Obi-Wan groaned, pinching the brim of his nose.

Jayla grinned. “Maybe it’s punishment.”

“No crime is worth this.”

Rex sniffed a laugh under his helmet. She’s just like a mini Anakin.

With a ferocious whoosh, the gunship doors sealed shut and the engine fired up. As quickly as the jokes had come before, any semblance of lightheartedness was gone now. Jayla tightened her grip on Obi-Wan’s robe, Obi-Wan cupped his free hand in front of her, and Anakin stood alert, keeping a close eye on their surroundings.

Rex couldn’t keep his eyes off her, either. When the gunship lurched forward as it took to the air, even he could see how white her knuckles were. She kept her eyes trained on a single stationary item in front of her, trying to stay steady and ignore the small glances she was getting from the 15 other clones packed inside. She stayed fairly still through it all, but every jerk of the ship as it picked up speed and entered the atmosphere caused her face to contort into a sick grimace. Rex could only imagine how many of his other daily experiences were like a nightmare to her.

Jayla could feel Rex’s gaze on her. Something about that was comforting as they rumbled toward the surface. Even over the wind, she could hear the sharp pitch of blaster fire. There was a lot of it.

Her stomach keeled when the gunship made its slow descent to the ground. It was time.

“Jayla?” Obi-Wan spoke as soft as he possibly could over the noise. “I’m going to give you over to Rex now. Are you ready?”

Jayla could only nod as Obi-Wan moved his hand in front of her and she stepped on. She wobbled when Obi-Wan took a few steps forward to meet Rex, who was trying not to seem so flustered. Anakin’s hand was resting on his lightsaber.

Obi-Wan made the split-second decision to place her on Rex’s shoulder pauldron. There wasn’t a whole lot to grab onto, so a wide surface would make it easier for her to stay steady. He knew she wasn’t going to like being in Rex’s hand, and he could sense Rex’s unease with that possibility.

With a little bit of hesitation, she leaped off Obi-Wan’s hand and onto the pauldron, taking note of how it felt like walking on a training mat instead of the hard plastoid she assumed it was. Rex turned his head as best he could not only to make sure she was secure, but to get a better look at her. It was hard to see what she looked like from so far away, but she was mere inches from him now. He didn’t really know what he was expecting, but he was still surprised to see she looked… human. Her long hair was pulled into a loop, like a ponytail but the end was tucked back into its elastic. Her ears were slightly pointed, but almost by a negligible amount. With the sleeve of her tunic blowing around in the wind, he could barely see the tiny markings of a tattoo on her wrist. She was definitely fit to fight — her arms were toned and her face looked battle-hardened. Well, save for the way her wide eyes seemed to tremble as she stared at the ground from her new vantage point.

“Are you okay, General?”

General. It took a moment for Jayla to realize Rex was addressing her.

“Hm—yeah— yeah, I’m good,” she said, staggering her legs for better balance. There was absolutely nothing to grab onto. If all else failed, there was always the ammo box pinned to his chest. “Just—try not to make any sudden movements. Or lean forward. Or fall.”

“Can’t make any promises, General,” Rex replied, dead serious. He splayed his fingers and held his palm out flat. “You sure you don’t want to—“

“I’m fine here, Captain,” she grumbled. “Let’s get going.”

She wasn’t sure what to expect when the doors to the gunship opened, but never in a thousand years could she have been prepared for it.

The towering buildings of Christophsis merely faded into the background for her; like mountains too far off in the distance to properly understand their size. The whole planet had a green hue to it, but the air was thick with red and blue blaster bolts whizzing by in either direction. Jayla could barely get a sense of where she was by eyesight alone. When she finally snapped out of her entranced state, she shut her eyes and let the Force tell her what she needed to know. Droids to her left. Hundreds of them. Thousands. Battle droids, destroyers, super battle droids. All arranged in an impossibly precise formation. To her right, the GAR. Hundreds of clones with heavy breath and piercing shouts in organized chaos. Every few seconds, she felt a sharp pain, like the poke of a needle on her back. Someone got shot. Someone got back up. Someone didn’t.

Through it all, Jayla was still able to hear Anakin's upbeat voice. “Good luck out there, General!”

Jayla managed a laugh, watching with a small smile as Anakin and Obi-Wan ignited their sabers and jumped head-on into the oncoming fire. Rex hopped out of the gunship with two other troopers with the same swooping shoulder pauldrons. Jayla immediately fell to one knee and threw her hand down for extra support as Rex charged forward, finding shelter behind what appeared to be a large piece of metal.

He turned to his troopers and pointed across the way, where there was an elevated structure along the main road. “Positions!” The two ARCs nodded and sprinted over. “That’ll be a good place to lay down some cover,” Rex said to himself as he flipped down his HUD.

“There.” He pointed to a row of tanks several hundred yards away. “The tac droid’s in the middle one.”

Jayla nodded, forgetting that Rex couldn’t see her. She quickly began carving out the best path to get them there safely, which unfortunately required a lot of places where they would be fully exposed.

“I hope those guys are a good shot,” she called out. “Or else we’re toast.”

“There are a lot of clankers out there... stay low and hold on tight, sir,” Rex said, giving her a moment to adjust her position. He flinched at the sudden sound of a small whoosh. Her lightsaber.

“Let’s go, Rex.”

[dear-yandere]

ungrateful.

yandere! rohan kishibe. tw: self-inflicted starvation, forced drugging, confinement. au: rohan is a normal mangaka with no stand bc ... that would complicate things.

art credit: zzyzzyy.

6 am. 

his day starts at 6 am, an hour spent pain-painstakingly crafting a balanced breakfast for his picky little muse — a fucking ungrateful one at that. food would paint the floors as soon as you awake because you’d act like nothing more than a child throwing a tantrum on good days. he expected it, at first, because that’s all you really were to him — a childish pest. at least...that’s all you used to be. another burden on his shoulders, another annoyance that had sauntered into his life — a wasp’s nest built just beneath his nose, waiting to bite.

falling in love with you truly was a joke, but rohan was a fool for letting it happen.

leftover food, coated with a thick layer of translucent spit, dribbled down your chin and stained the napkin stuffed down your shirt. the fact you needed a bib to eat was disgusting, but you’ve proven how uncooperative you intended to be as you rejected every meal. there’s no trying with you, was there? so why try? the question itself is stupid to him, he soon found, because as infuriating as it was, he still kept trying — he still kept hoping. is this what it means to be in love? is this why he could never understand this incessant feeling?

what a fucking tragedy.

“can you at least try to chew?” rohan clicks his teeth and shoved the chopsticks against your lips, frustrated when you didn’t listen for the tenth time. “you’re acting like an ungrateful child. do i have to spell it out for you? you’ll die if you don’t eat.”

talking to you is silly, really; he never expects a response, considering you refused to open your mouth whenever he’s around. your lips were already bleeding from how harshly he’d shoved the utensil against them; he hates using force, but he was running out of options and dealing with a dead body on his hands would be another burden he doesn’t need. “you don’t want to die, do you?” he asks, giving you one last chance to earn his forgiveness — no response.

“at least respond when you’re spoken to.” he hisses, moving away slowly as if backing away from a rabid animal. your eyes brightened at that, the tiniest hint of hope fluttering into the light of your eyes — until he pulls a sedative from his pocket.

“rohan--”

“oh? talking now, i see. don’t give me that look. you brought this on yourself.” he preps the clear fluid, flicking the tube and letting the liquid settle against the plastic syringe. the sight of it was unsettling to him, ironic at best, but he couldn’t bear watching you slowly wither away. you were nearly skin and bones at this point, and rohan  has never done well with guilt — especially when he has to clean up his own messes.

“sit still.”

“no! get away from me!” toenails dig against wooden floorboards,catching in the divets when you try to crawl away. if your eyes weren’t trained on him like a deer caught in headlights, you wouldn’t hear his approach in the slightest — blood rushed against your ears as if you were drowning in an ocean. desperate. you were desperate, completely at his mercy, an animal ready to be butchered.

“rohan, please!”

— why was this happening to you and not someone else?

“this hurts me more than it’ll hurt you.” he insists, but you couldn’t wrap your head around his twisted way of thinking. forcing you to eat is far more painful than inflicting it, and if he did it wrong, your lungs will collapse. at best, you’ll choke and die on your own spit. you’d trusted him, at some point, but it’s hard to believe he’s the same person as back then.

“i’m sorry! i’ll do anything, but please don’t do this—” you hardly felt the needle dig into your skin, but the effects were immediate. like they’d been shot with liquid lead, your arms fell limp at your side. a disgusting, numbing sensation spread across the length of your leg and pinned it against the hardwood floors.

“you’ll do anything?” came his condescending, velvety reply. “you act like you’re full of regret , but i know you don’t really mean it.” he retracts the needle and watches as you lose feeling in every limb and muscle — it was amusing really, a learning experience for his manga. he’s tempted to take notes, but for once, someone other than him took priority. what an unusual feeling, to put someone’s health above your own; perhaps he was wrong, perhaps this was love. he’ll certainly take notes on that later...

a faint shine catches the corner of his eye, and his lips twitch into a condescending smile at the sight of your tears. right now, you must be feeling so scared after realizing your limbs and muscles no longer work. he feels a twinge of sympathy, but that’s easily overshadowed by the curiosity of your sheer gall. “why are you crying? you knew this would happen.” he remarks and wipes the stray tears with your bib, face twisted in disgust. you haven’t even started eating and you’ve already made a mess of things. truly, you’re lucky he loves you. any other sane person would’ve thrown you to the curb by this point. 

“i told you this would happen if you don’t listen.” he chastised, but again he expects no response, as if he’s talking to a doll; though, he imagines it’s hard to respond under the influence of a tranquilizer. it doesn’t take long for your eyes to hesitantly close, though your tears refuse to relent. no matter...

“you’ll thank me later."

dear-yandere, all rights reserved.

[elderstiefel]

A Night to Forget - Miles Edgeworth x Phoenix Wright

Read also on AO3! Leave a comment & kudos if you want!

Summary :  Closeted gay man Miles Edgeworth decides to step out of his comfort zone for a night out on the town. But it all comes crumbling down when he bumps into a familiar face

The chain of events that led Miles Edgeworth to be standing in the middle of a gay club on a Saturday night was an interesting yet all too familiar one.

It started with the usual stress. Many sleepless nights mulling over cases; falling asleep on the office couch and waking up as the sun peeked through the blinds, ringing in another day of work. Rinse and repeat.

Stress can make you do some interesting things, many of which Miles thought he was immune to. Though he had come close to ripping his hair out from the root or throwing an expensive brandy glass against the wall, he always seemed to manage to calm himself down and be rational.

Managing the usual work-related stress was something that was second nature to him.

The stress of being a 25-year-old closeted gay man in the city with no time to do anything was something he was still trying to figure out.

It didn’t help when his two worlds collided, and he had to spend the day staring the stupidly handsome and annoyingly persistent Phoenix Wright in the face during a court session.

He convinced himself that his crush on Wright was brought about by the two sides of himself battling it out in his mind; his suave professional persona and the scared gay boy in the closet who just wanted to come out and have some fun.

Besides, he couldn’t seriously have feelings for Phoenix Wright. They were natural enemies. Wright was so annoying…brilliant, but annoying.

Going out on the town was one of those things way out of Miles’ comfort zone. He was rightfully accused of “not getting out much” but God, he didn’t think he was that terminal. It took a quick swig of vodka and a 20-minute pep talk to get him out the door.

He felt rather…sexy in his tight-fitting grey sweater and even tighter fitting burgundy pants. Not uncomfortably tight, more like made to fit his body just so. There was something about the way his clothes were tailored that made him irresistible to look at…or so he’d been told. He wasn’t planning on bringing anyone home tonight but he knew he definitely could if the opportunity came about.

This night spending too much money on drinks and pretending to know how to dance to popular songs was supposed to help him blow off steam. Let loose a little bit. God knows he didn’t have any opportunity while living in a Von Karma household, but being a grown man with a more than adequate income and one free night to himself, he wasn’t going to pass it up.

Forget the cases. Forget the court. Forget Manfred Von Karma. Forget that stupid Phoenix Wright. To hell with it. Tonight was his night.

Or so he thought.

He felt a vein pop in his neck when he spotted Phoenix Wright, dressed in a shirt and jeans that were impossibly tight, sitting at the end of the bar. He was wearing that stupid dorky grin on his face, and his stupid giggle as he cracked a joke with the bartender could be heard over the music. And My God, he looks so stupidly gorgeous-

It wasn’t until Phoenix was offering up an awkward wave that Miles realized his cover had been blown. Blown to absolute fucking smithereens.

It wasn’t like Miles could pretend he hadn’t seen Phoenix. He was still staring at him, wide-eyed, his feet glued to the club floor like a deer caught in the headlights of a semi-truck.

He couldn’t run, at least not that far. Sure the club was crowded but the shock of grey hair scrambling away would be easy to track down in the crowd.

The thump thump thump of the music turned into a dull buzz in the back of Edgeworth’s head as he tried to plan his escape. Panic made his vision go blurry, but he was quickly brought back from the void when that familiar voice called out to him.

“Miles? Hey, Miles!”

He was absolutely appalled by the greeting, his hands flying up to cover his mouth as if he was about to be sick.

Don’t scream my name in here you moron, I can’t be spotted in here, don’t act like this is so fucking casual why the fuck are you here-

“Edgeworth, are you alright?”

As soon as he noticed Phoenix had left his chair and oh fuck he’s coming this way, his feet finally let him move to hightail it out the door.

He didn’t create any scene at all, but Miles’ anxiety made it feel like every eye in the room was on him as he crashed out the door.

Everyone knows. Everyone saw me. Miles Edgeworth, the demon prosecutor, also a massive queer.

He held his head in his hands and tried to catch his breath in the alley beside the club. The dull thumping of the music bled through the brick wall he leaned up against.

Strings of words repeated over and over in his mind. He squeezed his eyes shut and tried to breathe but the words grew louder and louder. That voice…

Von Karma might be on death row but his words would forever live on in Miles’ head.

Failure. Queer. Pansy. Degenerate.

“…Miles?”

He jumped when a warm hand rested on his shoulder. He peeked up through his fingers at Phoenix, who wore an expression that was the perfect mix of awkward and sympathetic.

As much as he hated being seen like this, especially by someone like Wright, he couldn’t find the strength to straighten his posture and make eye contact. His eyes remained pasted on the concrete.

“… Wright. I-”

“Didn’t expect to see me here? I could say the same thing to you.” Phoenix offered a warm smile, one that persisted he was being genuine and not trying to poke fun.

“…please don’t-”

“Miles, trust me…I won’t tell anyone. Not even Maya, when she starts pestering the life outta me, asking where I’ve been. If you don’t want anyone to know…I get it.”

Miles’ eyes darted up to Phoenix for a brief moment, and he felt a jolt in his stomach that sent his eyes flying back to the ground.

Bracing himself on the brick wall, Miles straightened his back and cleared his throat as if nothing was wrong and he didn’t just have a near mental collapse in front of his work rival.

“I just…I found myself free this evening. And this- it’s not something I usually enjoy but-”

“You don’t have to explain it to me, I get it. Work is, uh…it’s a bitch! Let’s be honest.” Phoenix chuckled, reaching to scratch the back of his head.

Miles hated himself for noticing the fabric of Phoenix’s shirt stretch over his chest and how the sleeves strained at the biceps.

Miles crossed his arms over his chest and cleared his throat once again as if that would help him assert himself in this situation.

“I didn’t know you were gay.” He said bluntly, his eyes darting back and forth between Phoenix and the wall in front of him.

“Yeah, well… being gay is one thing. Being a lawyer is another. I think I do a good job of keeping my personal and professional life separate. But…damn, being a gay lawyer, there isn’t time to do anything!” Phoenix threw his hands up in exaggerated exasperation, offering another chuckle that Miles warmly responded to.

“You’ve got that right…” Miles felt just the tiniest bit more comfortable, much to his surprise. Because God, this was awkward. He knew the working relationship he and Phoenix had would be forever changed but for some reason…he didn’t give two shits. Something about Phoenix’s openness made all the shame melt away.

“But when you’ve got time…you might as well use it.” Phoenix slid his hands into his pockets and rocked back and forth on his heels. “And being a lonely gay in the club can be intimidating…”

“What are you implying, Wright?”

“Can I buy you a drink?”

____________________

Miles didn’t know what came over him, but he found himself, sitting next to Phoenix Wright of all people, at a gay bar, sipping on a $14 drink.

And it wasn’t his first $14 drink either. Phoenix started out getting them some cocktails that came with little paper umbrellas and candied fruit.

Experience tells us that these drinks are the most dangerous because they sneak up on you.

Miles twiddled the tiny paper umbrella between his fingers and sighed a bit more wantonly than he would ever care to admit.

“So…I never really came out to Von Karma, God knows I couldn’t. I thought I hid it pretty well but…he found my diary and…”

“Damn…I’m so sorry. I can only imagine how he reacted.” Phoenix rested his cheek in his hand and downed the rest of his drink.

Miles shivered a little bit as the memory flashed through his mind. “It wasn’t my proudest moment. I like to think everything he put me through shaped me into a better man but that was…terrifying. I thought he would send me away or…worse. All for writing about sneaking a kiss with a boy during lunchtime.”

Phoenix moved in a little closer to Miles. He could tell Miles needed a shift from cold memories to more awkward and funny ones. He wanted to see him smile.

“My parents never really suspected, y'know…I went through law school, and I never really had time to experiment or date. I had a few girlfriends in grad school but uh…well.” Phoenix gestured to the club around him. “You can imagine why those didn’t work out.”

Miles smirked and chuckled to himself, thankful for the change of subject. “Ah, the first girlfriends…I remember mine. Lovely girl.”

“Nice tits?”

“Oh, the nicest. And such a… curvy, womanly behind.” Miles tried his best to match Phoenix’s vulgarity.

They both snickered and simultaneously reached for their glasses, only to realize they were both empty.

“Ah, well…I’m outta cash.” Phoenix patted his pockets with a sad sigh.

“I’ll get the next round, pick your poison.” Miles reached for his wallet and pulled out $40 cash. Phoenix gasped and crossed his arms in such a childish way it almost made Miles lose it.

“Damn, Mr. Prosecutor came loaded! Why was I paying this whole time?!”

Miles let out a laugh that would certainly be deemed ungentlemanly and Phoenix melted a little in his seat.

“You offered the first drink. And you got so tipsy you just kept going.”

“What can I say, I can’t help but buy a handsome man a drink. Or two. Or four.”

Both of them felt the same flush in their cheeks, and they didn’t know if it was the alcohol or that they were both becoming aware of how much they shifted closer to each other during their conversation.

“Well…I can return the favor. I too enjoy splurging on handsome men.” Miles fiddled with his paper umbrella again, his eyes darting up to meet Phoenix’s.

The fruity drinks were certainly filling him with confidence, and he reached up and tucked the umbrella behind Phoenix’s ear, letting his fingers brush ever so gently across the skin of his neck on the way back.

The shiver that traveled through Phoenix was ungodlike and it nearly knocked him off his chair.

“I mean…maybe we could just take this back to your place? I know you have that good shit. The expensive stuff, aged for 40 years in an oak barrel and filtered through gold.”

Miles rolled his eyes and stuffed the cash back in his wallet. “It’s such a sophisticated drink, you can’t just down it like these subordinate cocktails.”

It wasn’t until Miles slipped his wallet back into his pocket that the reality of Phoenix’s question hit him like a ton of bricks.

He just asked to come home with me.

The next breath that left Miles’ lips was shaky. He glanced over at Phoenix, who was looking at his shoes and absentmindedly swirling the fruit in the bottom of his empty glass, staining it maraschino cherry red. He could tell he was just as nervous as he was.

“…it’s a bit of a walk.”

“It’s a nice night.”

____________________

Miles awoke the next morning on his living room couch, a painful crick in his neck and a pounding pressure swelling behind his eyes.

The first sight that greeted him, aside from the blinding sunlight that he immediately resented, was two empty glasses sitting on the coffee table. A few puddles of spilled brandy speckled the glass tabletop.

The night before was returning to him in bits and pieces. The club, Phoenix Wright, the paper umbrellas, the walk home…

He glanced down and drew in a quick breath at the sight of Phoenix sprawled on top of him, out like a light with a small string of saliva trailing from his lip onto Miles’ sweater.

Both of the men were fully clothed, minus shoes and socks, and both equally looking like absolute hungover messes.

A wave of relief washed over Miles as he realized they didn’t…do anything last night.

He’d never forgive himself if he and Phoenix Wright shared a night of passion and he couldn’t remember it.

As he lay there with Phoenix snoozing on top of him, a few more pieces of the night before came back to him.

They continued their talk about Miles’ closeted childhood. About how Von Karma drilled it into his mind that it was a phase he’d outgrow, and that if he didn’t, Von Karma would scare it out of him.

They talked about failed girlfriends, failed straight sex, and had a hardy laugh over that.

They talked about their first times with other boys…how liberating it felt. How good it felt to realize they weren’t broken.

After that, the night became a blur.

God, did Phoenix mention if he was a top or bottom? I can’t remember…

The sleeping man stirred on Miles’ chest and let out a rather loud yawn.

“Urgh… God damn it. This is why I don’t do this often.” Phoenix groaned, forgetting where he was and nuzzling into Miles’ chest.

“The aftermath certainly doesn’t seem worth it…” Miles tried to sit up but Phoenix kept him in his reclined position. He didn’t mind.

After sitting in comfortable silence for a bit, the gravity of the situation started to hit both of them. Miles cleared his throat and decided to break the silence first.

“Um… Wright.”

Phoenix scrunched his nose up and shifted to sit up. Leave it to Edgeworth to make things professional again.

“I know you mentioned you keep your personal and professional life separate…I strive to do the same.”

Phoenix rubbed his eyes and sat on the opposite end of the couch, distancing himself from the other man (as much as he didn’t want to, as much as he just wanted to snuggle back up with him and fall asleep).

“Yeah…you don’t have to tell me twice. This was… I had fun last night. But I don’t see how this has to change anything.” Phoenix offered a smile, to which Edgeworth returned.

“Yes, I agree. I had…fun.” Miles ruffled his hair, trying to smooth it out to no avail. “You’re right, this doesn’t have to change anything. I will remain vigilant in court and-”

“And I’ll be there to kick your ass.” Phoenix cut him off, smirking proudly.

Miles rolled his eyes and shot a look at Phoenix. And then another look. And then a sharp feeling rose in his stomach that was much more urgent than the hangover nausea that was cursing him this morning.

“What are you looking at? Do I have something on my face?”

His eyes were glued to the red and purple splotches left all over Phoenix’s neck and collarbone.

He swallowed hard as his eyes darted to the button of Phoenix’s jeans, his fly wide open just like his own. He shuffled his legs at his sudden realization.

Phoenix’s hair, instead of its usual spiky glory, was tousled like it had been previously ravished by hungry hands.

His heart in his throat, Miles returned his eyes to the messy coffee table in front of him. More memories of last night came seeping back into his mind and he felt his face grow hot.

“Uh… nothing. I had a good time with you last night. Good talk.” Miles’ hand flew to his own neck on instinct, and both him and Phoenix blushed wildly, knowing they were both sporting matching neck accessories.

It’s a good thing the next trial isn’t until Wednesday…

[heungtanbts]

“Oh no.”

“What is it? What happened? Who died?”

“I think I just felt an emotion.”

“You have GOT to be kidding me.” 

drabble #2: what is min yoongi?

Min Yoongi is a lot of things. He’s hardworking. A hard sleeper (natural disasters got nothing on him). A profound thinker. Quite a caring person, actually, but also a sarcastic hardass on the outside. Min Yoongi is a lot of things, but one thing he certainly isn’t is a weak softie for —

“Puppies!”

Yoongi’s hand is history. It’s like it ceases to even exist anymore as you drop it like dead weight to rush toward the large glass windows. You press your face up against the glass, not caring in the least bit if it’s dirty or germ-y or even covered in saliva. This was a totally normal and kind of regularly occurring sequence of events, at least whenever you both passed by a pet shop or animal shelter. Ever since you both talked about raising a pet together, you have been unable to stop the growing excitement from the thought of owning and raising a pet together. But Yoongi could never seem to get over the slight twinge of annoyance he felt every time you left him like he was cold leftovers. The sudden lack of physical contact with you just always seemed to get him. And for some dependent, furry, four-legged creatures? It was beyond him.

Before he can even get a word out, you’re already busting through the front door, the welcoming bell jingling wildly from your sudden entrance. By the time he’s crossed the street to arrive at the store, you’re already pointing to a copper fuzz ball in one of the pens by the window. And by the time he’s actually stepped foot inside, an employee’s already transferring said tiny fuzz ball into your cradled arms. It’s an automatic response for Yoongi to just sigh. Here we go again.

“____, babe I know we’ve been talking about possibly getting a pet, but-“

At the familiar sound of your boyfriend’s voice, you whip your head upwards to reveal your exceptionally beaming (and quite adorable) face. “Oh Yoongs, look. Just look at him.”

Yoongi reluctantly obeys and does just that, his eyes trailing over the cotton ball wriggling around in your arms. Two little black beads and the tiniest triangular button nose appear out of the cloud of auburn and stare right at him. Right into his soul. He scrunches his nose in response.

“Yeah, I’m looking babe, I’m looking.”

“And??”

Yoongi shrugs. “S’cute, I guess.” He knows what reaction you’re looking for, but isn’t sure if he is physically, mentally, emotionally, and spiritually able to conjure up a reaction even close to that for you. Man, if only Hobi were here. He could scream and jump around and freak out with ____ for me.

And as expected, you’re not satisfied with that reaction at all. Not one bit.

“Hang on a second.” Uh oh. That sounds like you have an idea. And when you have an idea, 99% of the time it means Yoongi will be pushed out of his comfort zone. Dating a happy, open, and adventurous extrovert like you pretty much guaranteed that. So when you gently shift the living beanie babie around to get a good grip of it and hold it out towards him, he isn’t surprised in the least. Frozen like a deer in the headlights? Yes. But surprised? No, no, not one bit.

“Um,” Yoongi licks his lips while taking an involuntary step back, “what do you want me to do with it?”

You give him a look of utter disbelief. “Are you serious? Obviously I want you to hold it.” He’s already shaking his head before you can even finish your sentence, and if your eyes aren’t deceiving you, you swear there’s just a slight hint of pure fear and terror in his eyes. It takes way more effort than you expected to keep a laugh from escaping your lips. He’s just too cute for his own good, truly.

“Babe, it’s a puppy, not a glass vase. Or a venomous snake. It’s literally a baby. It can’t do anything to you.”

“I’m allergic to babies.”

“Well thank God you didn’t die from holding my baby nephew last weekend.”

Yoongi lets out a disgruntled huff. “Okay seriously, it’s fine, I don’t need to hold it. If you like him and promise to 100% take care of him, then I will allow him to live in my sacred, humble abode and share the same air and space as me-“

You thrust the tiny puppy closer to Yoongi. “Just. hold. him.”

Min Yoongi is a lot of things, but he sure isn’t dumb. He knows better than to refuse you twice and keep you waiting like this, all smiles and pearly whites while simultaneously writing out his eulogy in your mind. Min Yoongi is a living, breathing man, and he plans on staying that way. So after another moment of rebellious reluctance (he couldn’t give in too quickly), he holds out his shaky hands and awkwardly accepts the squirming stuffed animal. You immediately push his hands and the small pup closer to his chest, your hands protectively hovering over his, just in case.

“N-now what?!” Yoongi stutters, eyes wide and scared. He swears he can feel a bead of sweat trickle down the back of his neck.  

“Well, you could start by at least looking at it.”

“O-okay.”

He hates to admit it, but he immediately notices the pup go still in his embrace. Not in the “oh shit did I just somehow accidentally kill it” kind of way, but the pup has stopped squirming and is now nestled quietly in his palms, nuzzling it’s little snout against his fingers. As if it felt comfortable there, safe, protected. And then it did something Yoongi never ever expected it to do.

It let out a tiny yawn.

Yoongi’s heart suddenly plunges into his stomach.

“Oh no.”

You immediately perk up at the tone of his voice, eyes furrowing in worry. “What? What is it? What happened? Who died?”

Yoongi takes in a shuddery breath, his eyes still focused on the now slumbering pile of curls in his hands. “I did. I just died. I think, I think I just felt an emotion.”

You don’t know whether to laugh, just smile or completely smack him upside the head. “You have GOT to be kidding me.”

You’ve been dating Yoongi for several years now, and you know just how soft he is for you. You can just see it in his eyes. You know you’ve won because his face will say it all. His expression will soften dramatically, and his eyes will start to ooze with longing and affection. And then he‘ll do this thing where he puts on the smallest of smiles and just looks at you like you’re the most precious treasure in the universe. It’s no secret that this man is head over heels for you. But never have you seen Min Yoongi look at something like that before.

Yoongi can’t take his eyes off of the little guy. When it yawns a second time, he prays it won’t do it again or else he will literally die and go to heaven and beg God to bring him back to life just so he can re-obtain possession of this puppy. He doesn’t care who’s watching or what people are thinking. He is now a changed man. He will openly admit that he’s got it bad. Real bad.

“Sooo,” You quietly say, carefully resting your chin on Yoongi’s shoulder to share his view of the puppy who has completely destroyed his formidable fortress and conquered his heart, “I was thinking, he kinda looks like a Holly.” For the first time since in what felt like 40 years, Yoongi looks up at you, adorning a puzzled but oh so soft expression on his face.

“Holly, huh? Isn’t this puppy a boy?”

You nod, a smile growing across your lips. “I don’t know, boy or not, he just looks like a Holly to me. Min Holly.” And that’s the final blow. The last push Yoongi needs to fall over the cliff and into the no-turning-back-zone. Min Holly.

Yoongi gently brushes his thumb over Holly’s furry little head and bites his lip, unable to stop a smile from escaping. He immediately looks up at you and then at the employee standing behind you, his expression completely serious.

“Where do I sign?”

—

send in a dialogue or line of dialogue + a bts member for this drabble game!

[tmnt-imagines]

How the turtles would react to accidentally hitting you: Leonardo

The room fell silent in a second; not one of them even dared move a muscle, not even Leo. He’d frozen. He didn’t move, he didn’t blink, hell you didn’t even think he was breathing by this point. He just stared forward, his ocean eyes filling with their own little oceans that threatened to spill down his cheeks if you didn’t say something soon. He needed you to be ok, he needed you to tell him it was alright, and that you weren’t hurt, he needed you to do something; because he couldn’t. He hadn’t meant to lash out, he hadn’t meant to shout, he hadn’t meant to hurt you. He was the calm one, the leader, he was supposed to stay level headed - he didn’t know how to react to this. Because this wasn’t him, it was against everything he ever thought or believed, and suddenly everything around him was crumbling down.

His brothers looked at him with more anger than he’d ever seen, even Michelangelo was glaring through his orange mask. And you. You just stared back at him without the slightest hint of...well, anything.

It stung, you’d give him that. It hadn’t hurt nearly as much as you thought it would’ve, but then it didn’t seem to be a particularly powerful punch. You thought it could have been the shock, and that maybe the pain would kick in later. But what really hurt was the look on Leonardo’s face. He looked like he had been the one to get hit, because he looked so hurt and defeated you’d think he just lost a fight. He wasn’t doing anything  but stare at you, and you knew why. 

“Leo-” You tried to step forward, but that just tipped him further over the edge. Whatever dark abyss Leonardo had just fallen into, it looked like it was a deep one. Because as soon as you even blinked, he was gone. As soon as you said his name, he flinched and scuttled away like a helpless child. His expression was so filled with horror, that the pain in your cheek hardly mattered at all. 

He put his hand up, keeping you at a distance because suddenly he couldn’t trust his own body; he couldn’t trust himself not to hurt you again. He was disgusted, horrified, and mostly scared. He’d hurt the most important thing in his life, and though you were clearly alright, you could’ve so easily not been. He could’ve hurt you, really really hurt you. He couldn’t forgive himself for even getting close to letting that happen. And you knew it would be a long time before he recovered from this; because it really did break him. 

He shut himself away in his room for a week, he didn’t say a word to anyone. The others were overly protective of you. Even Raphael smothered you with attention and care; as though you were a child, a fragile thing that could break at the tiniest of things. You liked that they cared about you, but they hardly let you go to the toilet alone, they were with you all of the time. And any chance to see Leo was near to impossible. There was always one of them with you, and another guarding Leo’s door, just in case you tried to go to him. 

He was destructive. He was frightened of his fits. And he hated himself for what he did, no matter how trivial it was to you. 

When he did eventually come out of his room, he ignored you, stuck to the walls and steered clear of anyone. He would simply meditate in the dojo, occasionally talking to Splinter; but apart from that, he didn’t do anything else. 

You finally cornered him while he was in there alone, and somehow you’d gotten away from Donatello long enough to slip into the dojo without anyone noticing. Leo didn’t even seem to hear you, which was surprising given his keen hearing. You presumed whatever he was thinking about had him preoccupied. 

“Leo?” You practically whispered, and to your surprise he still didn’t hear you. So you edged closer, careful to keep a distance as to not startle him when he did finally open his eyes. “Leonardo?”

He jumped, to you it seemed like several feet. He’d heard you that time, and instinctively he got as far away from you as he could in a second. You tried to calm him down, but the look he gave you made it clear he was panicking, terrified he might do something else to hurt you. 

“Leo!” You took one step closer and he froze. He was stood on the other side of the training mat, looking at you like a deer caught in the headlights. He was shaking, visibly, and all you wanted to do was comfort him. But he wouldn’t let you get that close. “What are you so afraid of?” 

“I...” That was the first thing he’d said in almost a week, you’d forgotten how much you loved his voice. “I don’t want to...” He was stumbling over his words, you’d never seen him this afraid, and it made your heart shatter. He was the leader, the strong and brave one, and right now he was putty in your hands. He was so weak and helpless, and there wasn’t anything you could do, except wait.

“You aren’t going to hurt me, Leo.” You took another step forward, and he flinched, but he didn’t move. “That was an accident - a one-off. You aren’t going to do it again, I know you won’t.” You kept going, until you were about a foot away. He was looking at you with glossy eyes, and all you wanted to do was hold him. “I trust you.” 

And in that instant, he just collapsed. He hit the mat with a loud thud, but not loud enough to disclose the faint sobbing that could easily be heard from where you stood. You immediately ran to him, and held him close. It as going to take a while for him to get over this, but you would always be there to remind him that everything’s alright.