#i had to fight so hard not to address miku as miss steal yo man

[brisquad-unit-4402]

Hi! I saw your requests were open so if I may, can I request an Ike scenario or fic where he buys this huge Miku body plush or smth (cause we all know he loves Miku 🤭) and it kinda annoys reader at night since there’s like no space for them to sleep anymore 🥲. And like after a while reader just decides to sleep on the couch for the night and Ike comes up to them and reader finally confronts him about it.

I’m sorry if it sounds so specific but this certain idea has been keeping me awake at night 💀😭

And any reader is fine like (but most preferably female reader)

Thank you so much for your time <3

miku please don't take him just because you can

shoutout to this tweet for being the first thing i thought of when i saw this request. do you guys remember the supermassive miku plush that released around this time last year? that’s what i based ike’s miku off of because it’s so cute and. i gotta level with you. ike would be the perfect boyfriend and i would be so blessed to have him in my life and if the only condition is that he has to hog the bed with that three foot miku plushie i would go shopping for a comfier couch

tags: fluff, comedy, crack treated seriously, gender neutral reader

─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

You stare down at Hatsune Miku. You’re surprised that you don’t have to lower your neck as much as you are. When your boyfriend told you he was going to order a giant Miku, you were expecting a body pillow or a tall figurine. You certainly didn’t see the three-foot-tall plush coming. Her head ends a little bit above your hips, and she sits perfectly on the ground, balanced by her outstretched legs and beanbag pigtails. 

“Yeah,” you say. “That’s Miku.”

“Miku,” Ike repeats, absolutely riveted. You see the sparkles in his eye through his glasses as he sits next to her. When he crouches down, he’s somehow a few inches shorter than her, and only then do you realize just how massive she is. 

You both think of the song reference and sing in time. “Oo-ee-oo!”

Ike hugs Miku from the side. His face squishes against Miku’s, and the cuteness is doubled. “She’s so soft. Feel how soft she is, Reader.”

You comply. Sure enough, Miku is made from a cozy minky fabric that feels nice no matter which way you rub the plush. She has just enough give that you can hug her comfortably, but she keeps her shape no matter how tight you grab around her. 

“I love how they did her eyes,” you say. “They’re so detailed, but they don’t look uncanny.”

Ike buries his face into the Miku void. “I think this is the best purchase I’ve ever made.”

You play with the pigtail on your side of the Miku plush. You wouldn’t call yourself a huge Vocaloid fan- that’s Ike’s thing- but you know enough about it to keep up in a conversation with your boyfriend, as well as understand just how deep his love for Miku runs. It’s never been a problem for you in your relationship, though. She’s a fictional character, after all, and you’re not immune to hot characters in your favorite shows and games either. You get to openly simp over your favorite love interests in light novels and Ike gets his Miku merch. It’s an equal dichotomy. After all, there’s nothing more attractive than when Ike gets passionate about something and takes about it nonstop, and if Vocaloid is one of those things, then you welcome it with open arms.

You raise the pigtail just a few inches off the ground before letting it drop. It plops with a satisfying noise from the beanbag texture inside. “Welcome to our family, Miku.”

.　 . • ☆ . ° .• °:. *₊ ° . ☆

Usually you’re the last to get to bed, even when considering both yours and Ike’s awful sleep schedules. Sometimes your work and hobbies keep you up way longer than intended, and so by the time you climb into bed Ike is already asleep. He looks even more angelic than usual when he sleeps all covered in blankets, and you get to admire the gentle parts of his face that this glasses usually hide in the day. 

You enter the bedroom after finishing your nightly routine, and you’re greeted by an adorable sight. On his side of the bed, Ike is fast asleep, but in less blankets than usual to make room for Miku. One arm is wrapped lazily around her, while one of his legs holds her close to his body as he rests. Miku’s head plops right underneath his chest, so you get an eyeful of one innocent face right on top of another.

For a moment, you don’t even want to disturb the peace, so you take a photo with your phone instead to immortalize the moments before you climb into bed. Even though it takes you some adjusting to get used to the giant Miku body, you finally contort your body and fall asleep.

.　 . • ☆ . ° .• °:. *₊ ° . ☆

You wake up the next morning crumpled up on the far side of the bed. Ike is nowhere to be seen, nor is Miku. You don’t think too much of it; after all, you’re the last to fall asleep, so it makes sense you’d be the last to rise as well. Besides, you have work today. 

You get ready for the day, and once you’re presentable you step out into the living room on the way out the door. You finally find Ike. He sits on the floor as he reads a book, and uses Miku as a back pillow. He placed her arms around his shoulders, and he looks delightfully comfy.

“Heading out, Reader?” Ike perks up when he notices you walk by out of the corner of his vision.

You throw on your jacket. “Yep. Work starts soon. I think I’ll run a few errands before I get home, too.”

“Alright. Be safe,” he says. As you pass Ike, you crouch down and kiss him. He’s always smiling whenever you part. “I love you.”

“I love you too,” you say. “I’ll see you later this evening.”

.　 . • ☆ . ° .• °:. *₊ ° . ☆

You spend dinner and the evening together before working alone at night. Ike’s known to have bouts of creativity and write some of his best story beats when it’s late, and you have some things to type up on your computer for work, anyways.

Once again, you’re the last to get to bed, but you’re just in time before Ike falls into deep sleep, and just like last night he’s clutching the Miku plush. You shuffle under the covers. Ike doesn’t open his eyes, but hums sleepily. His voice is soft and low. “G’night, Reader. G’night, Miku.”

“Sleep well, Ike,” you whisper. You gently push aside one of Miku’s pigtails as you try to get comfortable, before the other plops down right over your body. “Miku.”

Miku’s innocent face stares into your soul. She’s cute, but you have to be honest, last night’s sleep wasn’t the comfiest in the world. Miku takes up a lot of room on the bed, and since you’re always the last to enter you’re usually shoved off to the side to make room for Miku in the middle.

But also, Ike looks so serene, and you don’t want to wake him up again.

You brush Mku’s pigtail away, careful not to disturb your boyfriend, and wriggle into the best position you can. You still feel cramped, but it’s not like you can do any better. Miku keeps staring at you as you fall asleep.

.　 . • ☆ . ° .• °:. *₊ ° . ☆

Another day passes and another night comes, but this time, you come prepared. You decide to get to bed early and stake your claim before Miku can. You fall asleep as soon as possible, comfortably nestled under the blankets but with enough room for Ike and Miku once they’re ready for bed.

…You wake up in the middle of the night with a snort. Your body is too hot to be comfortable, and when you blearily open your eyes you realize why. Ike must’ve let go of Miku during the night, so she tumbled out of his grasp and over your face. She looks at you with those beautifully embroidered eyes. 

I can’t win, you silently brood. You squint through a gap between Miku’s plush body. Ike is fast asleep, but you can’t push Miku back to his side without disturbing him. 

You grumble a little while you move Miku around, careful not to wake the sleeping Ike. It’s a cautious ordeal, and you realize with dread that there’s no way to place Miku on the bed without her being on top of someone. You’re not a fan of the extra pressure on your body as you sleep, but Ike looks so comfortable, and you don’t have the heart nor energy to move her off the bed.

You give up. “Please don’t smother me again, Miku,” you quietly plead, and gently place her above the lover half of your body. It’s not exactly the best feeling in the world, but at least Miku isn’t covering your face.

You move your back to face away from Miku, pray your body isn’t too achy in the morning, and lull back to sleep.

When you wake up Miku is back in your face again. You grunt awake with morning in your voice. “I really can’t win.”

.　 . • ☆ . ° .• °:. *₊ ° . ☆

It’s been about a week since Miku first arrived in the household, and you have to be completely truthful to yourself here. You’re starting to worry if Miku is more of a priority to Ike than you. You haven’t mentioned Miku hogging the bed yet, but you’re getting used to how you wake up in the morning with sore joints from weird positions, and you hate it. 

Even in the day Ike spends more time and more time with Miku than the day before. You remember stepping out of your office during a break from work the other day, and noticing that Ike was playing video games by the TV, hugging Miku in his lap while he held the controller, just like how he used to do with you just last week. 

Another time you got home late from a work meeting out of the house and saw Miku sitting in a chair at the table like a dinner guest. The night before, you took a picture of yourself in bed while Ike cuddled Miku. Me, my boyfriend, and his 700 dollar, three-foot-tall Hatsune Miku, you captioned it. It was pretty funny, until you remembered that you still had to fall asleep and wake up by Miku’s iron fist. 

Today’s workload was a lot more than usual, and you had no hope of getting to bed in time before Miku did. Sure enough, when you entered the bedroom Ike and Miku were already sprawled across the mattress, and you only had a sliver of space left on your side. 

You had a long day, and you could’ve sworn Miku’s innocent eyes held smug contempt for you as you made eye contact.

“Am I getting Jolene’d?” You wondered aloud, still hushed so not to wake Ike. Well, two can play at that game. 

You grabbed a few extra blankets from the linen closet, snatched your pillow off your side of the bed, and went to the living room. Before long, you made yourself a resting place on the couch. It wasn’t the comfiest place in the world, but it would certainly be better than Miku’s domain, and you were too tired to ask for anything else.

.　 . • ☆ . ° .• °:. *₊ ° . ☆

You awoke with only a little bit of a crick in your neck. Improvement!

The second thing you detected after that, though, was the scent of bacon and maple syrup in the next room over, an utterly delicious combination. Your stomach growled. 

You rubbed the sleepy out of your eyes into the kitchen. You were greeted by Ike standing over the stove in an apron, halfway through flipping a pancake. He perked up when he noticed you. “Reader, there you are! Good morning!”

“Morning,” you say. Your voice is low with the grit of drowsiness. You take a seat at the table, and you notice Miku is nowhere to be seen. You barely close your eyes before you hear a dish slide in front of you. When you regain your sight you see Ike place a few strips of bacon on your plate of pancakes and move the maple syrup bottle across the table to you. “Thanks for breakfast.”

“You’re welcome. I’m just glad to see you. I got worried when I realized you weren’t in bed last night!” He chuckles a little, but everyone in the room can tell he’s a bit nervous. “About that. Um, Reader, can I ask? Why weren’t you in bad last night?”

On one hand, you’re relieved that Ike ripped the band-aid off before you did, but on the other hand, you remember you’re feeling envious of a Vocaloid plushie.

You sink your fork into a bite of pancake drizzled in syrup. “Miku,” you admit. “It’s just that she takes up so much space in our bed that I can’t get comfortable, and you don’t cuddle with me like you used to. It feels like you’re spending more time with her than me, you know?”

“I think I get it.” Ike sits at the table next to you. “Reader, are you jealous?”

“I’m aching, is what I am.” You pout and stuff your face with pancake so you don’t have to talk. It’s light and fluffy.

“You are!” Ike grabs your hand under the table. “Oh, Reader, you don’t have to hide it. It’s just adorable that you are.”

“My neck is sore, Ike.”

“Let me kiss it better.” He wraps his arms around you in a hug as he does, and when he’s done they still remain around you. “I know you’re irreplaceable, Miku or no Miku. I just hope you know it as well.”

“I know, it’s just that it’s harder to remember lately. We don’t spend nearly as much time together as we did before you bought her.”

“To be honest, I always thought that I was being a clingy nuisance. I bought her just because, but I realized I could hold her instead of annoying you for cuddles.”

That seems to wake you up. “Ike, you’re never a nuisance. And I never thought you were being annoying. I miss it a lot, actually.”

“That’s good. I never knew that it mattered to you as much as it does for me.” Ike presses another kiss to your forehead. “How’s this? I’ll finish up making breakfast, and we’ll play some games until you need to leave for work. Then when we’re in bed I’ll cuddle you as much as you want, no Miku required.”

“Sounds like a plan. And you can go ahead and hold Miku while I’m out of the house or whatever, just don’t forget about me, okay? I’m irreplaceable, right?”

“That you are. Now get back to eating before your pancakes get cold.”

Ike pats your head before he gets up and gets back to the stove, and you smile as you cut another slice of your pancakes. Miku or not, you’re grateful you have a boyfriend as thoughtful as Ike.

You eat the rest of your pancakes in victory. You look forward to having enough room in bed again.

.　 . • ☆ . ° .• °:. *₊ ° . ☆